#now they are both Domestic

[vsemily]

Meat Cute

[thirstyvampyr]

What's that about anyway? It's a long story. Ends in all-you-can-eat tamales. Come here.

[babooshkart]

happy new year, boyfriends 🎇

girlfriends make for boyfriends, part 2: holiday edition (a gift from @emmalovesdilemmas and I for @saintgarbanzo and @academicdisasterfic ) 💕 We hope this upcoming year is kind to you both and full of warmth, love, and many new good memories together

[llondonfog]

consider: baul and lilia going to blows over who has the cutest (grand)child, sebek or silver

[critter-creature-or-beast]

Wellness check for the house critters today. They're both in good health! The vet is surprised at how healthy Noodles is at her age. Noodles is the black lop, is 8 years old, and has no apparent issues besides mild cataracts. Dumpling is on a waiting list for neutering, but they're booked up until next year.

[scripturiends]

two clips where jerome and joy weren’t even officially together yet but they were acting like they’ve been dating for more than a year 😭

[westwiiind]

big fan of how the two main love interest/mother characters in how to train your dragon canonically CANNOT cook for SHIT. httyd said fuck ur gender roles the MEN will be doing the cooking bc if the WOMEN did it ppl would DIE

[tequiilasunriise]

Let’s see here- an abusive, narcissistic prick who manipulates women and has a clear red raging bull design but the fandom calls him a “fucken goatman” regardless?

At the very least Adam was so homophobic that, in a roundabout way, he became the number one Bumbleby truther (“I will make it my mission to destroy everything you love, starting with her”, “WHAT DOES SHE EVEN SEE IN YOU?!”, etc etc), the fuck does Montyass got going fer him???

[togamicrying]

i think togami agonizes about not being able to say “i love you” back to naegi  for MONTHS into their relationship bc like. he DOES love him, he KNOWS that he loves him but thats not something that togamis SAY, ever.

until one day he comes home from just like. a dogshit terrible day at work and naegi is just. hanging out, soft and tired and open in a way that he could never be, and he just says it without thinking. and then they both have a panic attack.

[simplydnp]

Stop im rewatching why dan is leaving me bc of ur post theyre so disgustingly domestic i adore them

sometimes i watch that video just to feel something

[unbidden-yidden]

Despite being (effectively) a Judaism/religion blog, I think I'm gonna end being known for my no-fault divorce, abortion and birth control takes. And honestly? Fine.

I'm a religious person who supports family planning and families of choice and more importantly, I work with domestic violence survivors professionally and so I see the consequences of each up close and personal.

Without no fault divorce, some of my clients would be dead. Without abortion access, some of my clients would be trapped being legally tied to their abusers for 18 more years through their shared child/ren.

And on the flipside, the so-called "pro-life" and anti-divorce mentality of too many churches has convinced some of my clients to not get abortions or divorces that would have helped them escape. I have seen this lead to their children unrelated to the abuser continuing to be abused by him, including choked, beaten and/or raped, never mind the client herself. (Very pro-life, pro-family, and pro-child, guys! Good job!👍)

And birth control? Do you have any idea how important birth control (including secret birth control) is and any idea how frequently abusers try to interfere with it to trap them in the relationship? I've had clients whose abusers have literally pulled out their IUDs during sex.

So yeah. No fault divorce saves lives. Abortion saves lives. Birth control saves lives. All three prevent additional and more severe forms of domestic violence from occurring.

[chilapis]

And I’m off to bed. Good night everyone, I cannot promise the ask game will be carried on tomorrow (except for remaining mutuals hi yours WILL be done tomorrow) but I will do my best. But first.

My gorgeous beautiful husband who is so wonderful and everything to me. My world. My light. It is 3 am and I have to be up in 4 hours. Makes out with him sloppy and also supports him emotionally and unconditionally .

[buildoblivionthenwewilltalk]

See, the thing about Crowley living in his car in s2 is that I left the s1 finale with the impression that both of them finished their lunch, staggered their way back to the book shop (gently sloshed) and spent the night getting absolutely hammered. Like drain the wine cellar, night on the town, capital-P Pissed.

It’s all a bit ‘rambunctious’, as a fussy and well read angel might say.

Crowley wakes up on Aziraphale’s sofa a week later - covered in a blanket, various papers and a copy of the Sunday times.

A pot of tea’s just finished steeping, there’s cake in the tin. Somewhere across the shop, a tartan-clad figure hums (rather untunefully) to himself as he pours over a crackled hardback book.

If you asked Crowley, it’s all quite civilised, if a tad “country living magazine”. A little gauche. A bit twee - not really his ‘style’.

But he doesn’t reach for his glasses, or pat his jacket for his keys.

After all, he thinks, stretching what’s probably the correct number of limbs and reaching out for a bone china cup, why on Her green earth would he ever want to leave?

[the-starry-seas]

love that jango mentions how annoying boba's been about always bringing home sea mice and then comes home from a job to see a brand new 100+ gallon tank FULL of the little fuckers bc myles finally saw one and immediately thought they were cute and jango's just

[tswwwit]

the idea of dipper and bill having to act as a "normal" white fence suburdan home married couple bc of "blending in with community" to investigate some particular magical phenamone or a cult or a monster or whatever and dipper is suffering, and bill is suffering too but he's also having sick fun with horrid fascination as an insane demon does, and they ask mabel for ideas, they have a barbeque housewarming party-

-wont leave my mind, its been *days*

dipper: this sucks, people live like this???

bill: I KNOW! THIS SUCKS! *fascinated like a watching a trainwreck or natural disaster* AMAZING

Pine Tree shuts the door behind him very quietly. A gentle 'click' as the latch sets in place.

Bill looks up from where he was flipping through the newspaper. He puffs on his pipe - unlit, but hey! It's for the look of things! - and smiles.

"Hello honey!" Bill takes the pipe out of his mouth, bouncing a slipper on his foot. "How was the homeowner's association meeting?"

Pine Tree stares forward. A muscle in his jaw twitches.

Bill hums to himself, and smiles.

Domesticity! Such as it is. That wonderful white-picket fence, no magic, no monsters, and no chaos-

The paper under his hands tears slightly. Bill clears his throat, shuffling the pages. He gives up on the ruse of news-reading - whether or not those nosy assholes across the street are watching - and flips, nonchalant, right to the comics section. He already solved the crossword in his head ten minutes ago.

Easy. He's got this. It's only been, like a couple days. There are way longer cons he's played, and this one isn't the worst!

Besides.

He'll be damned if he breaks before his mortal does.

"I talked to Linda." Pine Tree's voice is flat. He slowly strides over to the window, and draws the curtains shut.

"And?" Bill prompts, sitting up a little more. Man, sapling's got a full thousand yard-gaze going! He watches with fascination.

"She's so glad to see that the," Pine Tree lifts his hands, making finger quotes. "'Non-traditional' couple is so," He swallows, holding down some simmering fury. "'Decent'" Bill's throat jumps, but. Nope, not perfect. The gagging noise still came through. But he nods, very seriously.

Acting.

"And," Pine Tree says, very slowly. Turning towards Bill, equally slow, and deliberate. "Even though she said I could water the lawn, since it's dying, now I can't water the lawn, because it violates some…" His hand clenches to a fist by his side. "Like, contractor agreement thing?"

"Oh, don't worry about that, honey!" Bill exclaims, with a perfect nineteen fifties voice - he's got that in the bag. "I'm sure it'll all work ou-"

"Except," Pine Tree strides in, planting hands on Bill's armchair, and staring him right in the face. "We're also getting fined for every day that the lawn is dead."

Bill can't help it. He snorts, face scrunching up. A full catch-22! Linda's got another thing coming, eventually. Once they track down this monster.

But hey! Bill can understand sadism, and contractual bullshit! If only Pine Tree wasn't around, he'd have made the trap appropriately lethal.

"Aw, rough day, huh?" Bill sets his pipe down, patting his husband on the shoulder. "Don't worry, honey, we'll-"

And Pine Tree yanks him forward. Gripping Bill's smoking jacket so tight that he hauls him nearly out of his chair. Bill blinks.

"If you call me 'honey' again," He mutters. "I'm going to murder you."

Bill can't stop his laugh this time, and as his cute little mortal rattles him back and forth -

Oh thank chaos, Pine Tree's the one broke first.

"Bill? This sucks." Pine Tree insists, teeth gritted. Shaking Bill harder now. He searches for words, he splutters - one hand waves at the air. "How does anyone live like this?"

Ha! Maybe now he gets how great he has it. No bureaucracy ! No trying to hide what you are from jerks who think magic is 'wrong'! No suburban life, no lawncare, and no rules!

Bill's mortal has too many hangups. You can explode any problem if you want to!

Pity he's not willing to do it with Linda.

"Hell if I know!" Bill exclaims, and surges up. He heaves out a breath, scratching at his neck. "Bullshit magical prejudice. Don't worry, kid!" He pats his husband on the back. "We'll get out of here in no time."

The monster that's preying on these mortals can't hide much longer. Once that's solved, Bill's contingency will kick in. And then -

"No, I found the vampire," Pine Tree says, half distracted. Bill does a double-take. What, he didn't mention that first? "I just, uh."

Bill wags a hand. Prompting.

And Pine Tree shrugs. Offering up an awkward smile. He rubs the back of his neck. "I…. kinda rigged her septic tank to blow once we got out of here."

Bill tugs him closer, beaming now. "Now that's a nice move!" He tucks his hands under Pine Tree's arms, but the human squirms away before he can pick him up. "It's what, a vicinity based setup?" A quick nod, and he grins wider. "Clever trick, kid." "I'd... ask if that's too much, but knowing you, it's not." Bill's cute little mortal punches him, adorably, in the stomach.

"Pfft, nah, that's nothing," Bill nudges him, and grins. Pine Tree's not the only guy who's heard some comments. "You should see what I set up for her house."

[variousqueerthings]

heterosexuals really want to see lenny and midge get together

queers understand that it's all about susie and midge