#ofc not knowing what their jobs is was on purpose. but i still wanna know!!

[joelsmochi]

Be The Boss - Javier Peña

loosely (actually extremely) inspired by the song you can be the boss by lana del rey ♡ i woke up with this idea and immediately got to writing, i love you smut sluts <3 hope you enjoy :3 this is also all lowercase ! i'm thinking of making a part 2... >:)

plot: ofc genie stumbles across javier in more places than one, and they... can't get enough of each other.

warnings: SIMP!javi, language, soulmates trope, mention of drug use, reader is a bit of a javi apologist (i meannnnn), creampie, fingering (f receiving), oral (f receiving), some angst, mentions of death, choking, office sex, public sex, chance of getting caught, sex with other people nearby (not involved), i may have flexed the timeline of the story a bit + steve is there during the cali cartel job (just for storytelling purposes), prob typos + grammatical errors (english & spanish). lmk if i missed anything pls!!!

wc: 9.1k

masterlist

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ✮ ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚

those blue jeans and that white button-up shirt had genie fanning herself since she walked into the supermarket, but what kept making it worse was that the universe seemed to be forcing the two adults into the same aisle. she’d purposefully skip an aisle she needed to go down and circle back later only to find he still spawned wherever she went.

not like she was too awfully mad though. she knew it was just a mere coincidence, or maybe he found her attractive too. maybe she was the one following him, and not the other way around. maybe she was just reading into it too much — this happens often. you know when you go grocery shopping and can’t seem to get away from another customer? maybe that’s all this was. maybe.

later that night she decided to take her friend's boyfriend’s offer up to get out and go to a bar with them, and since she was feeling a little sad that the man from the market never approached her even though she was too bashful to do it herself, she needed a pick me up. third-wheeling with her friend and her boyfriend may just be the motivation she needed to stop feeling sorry for herself.

a couple hours into the night genie was having more fun than she expected. her friend, aimee, was much more considerate than previous ones; she made sure genie felt included in the conversations and even spoiled some inside jokes just so that genie could laugh too.

playing pool, turning down pushy men for dances and drinks, and watching strangers basically have sex in the middle of the bar was more entertaining than she expected. that could just be the alcohol talking though.

she knew the universe was laughing at her, however, when the man from the market walked in with two rubios trailing behind him. genie’s eyes widened a bit, having narrowed from her tipsy state, and as if she couldn’t get more tense at that moment he made eye contact with her. she pretended to be confident about it and gave him a sweet smile while waving. he frowned for a second trying to remember where he’d seen her before.

the pretty girl in the pretty sundress from the market.

he gave genie a half smile and waved back before glancing as his shoes briefly and walking back to his friends.

“go talk to him!” aimee smacked genie’s arm over enthusiastically. “if you don’t i’m dragging him to the table.”

genie laughed knowing she is 100% serious. “i will, just let him settle in for a few minutes. can’t seem like a groupie,” genie bargained.

“who is that?” aimee’s boyfriend, cory asked while eyeing the trio from across the room.

“no idea,” she admitted, “we just kept bumping into each other at the market earlier. i think he was eyeing me, but i didn’t wanna just stare so i don’t know. seems like he recognized me though.”

“well, duh, you’re fucking hot,” aimee exaggeratedly compliments. “especially when you wear those sundresses, your ass looks so big and juicy in those i’m literally jealous.”

“please, you’re literally built like jane fonda, and everyone knows that jane fonda has the perfect ass. i’m jealous of you.”

“can we not talk about how you two basically want to fuck each other when i’m right here?” cory grimaces, but genie could see the smile creeping on his face indicating he was joking.

“awe, if i wanted her i’d have her already,” genie teased.

“she’s right,” aimee confirmed. the two best friends began laughing loudly at cory’s expense when they heard a voice from beside the table.

“perdóname.” [excuse me].

genie turned her head and met eyes with the moreno, grinning widely at his seemingly timid presence. “¿cómo puedo ayudarte?” [how can i help you]

“no tengo mucho tiempo, pero, lo quería darte esto.” he extended a cigarette out to the brunette; she admired how his harsh features softened at the sight of her for a moment, ultimately taking it from his slender fingers with a confidence that she forced yet seemed natural to everyone surrounding. [i don't have much time, but i wanted to give you this]

“gracias. acabas de llegar, ¿no?” [thank you. you just got here, no]

“claro, pero el trabajo llama.” [of course, but work calls]

genie nodded once clearly not believing him as a sly smirk tugged the corners of her lips while she fiddled with the cigarette. she turned it over quickly finding his phone number sloppily written on it. “¿trabajo, sí?” [work, huh]

“what’s he saying?” cory asked; aimee shushes him and genie ignored him, finding herself aiming to maintain the eye contact she held with the handsome stranger.

“¿llámame? salvo que no quieras.” [call me? unless you don’t want to]

“¿cómo debería llamarme?” she was poking at his boundaries which was something she found herself doing often. she loved to laugh and joke, so it was important to her to test those waters. [what should i call you]

he squints, unsure of what exactly she was asking until it dawned on him. “javier. javi.”

“javi,” she tutted after saying his name a way to tease him making him just bashfully smile. “bien. te daré una llamada, javi.” they exchange goodbyes and she turned back to her friends. [good. i’ll give you a call]

“i got javier,” the boy says, “that’s about it.”

“he just wanted me to have his number, that’s all,” genie said.

“are you about to have your first summer fling, genie?!” aimee nearly shouted in attempt to make her blush (which worked every time). “i want every juicy detail when you taint him.”

“you’re lucky i love you.”

-

genie waited a few days to give this javi a phone call. she didn’t want to seem too eager or desperate as she typically enjoyed waiting until men begged for attention.

but when she did decide to call it was like he had been posted by the phone for the last seventy-two hours because he picked up on the second ring.

“¿bueno?” [hello]

“¿javier?” she asked much more softly than she intended. unbeknownst to her the delicacy in her voice made him weak in the knees.

“sí, ¿eres la mujer del bar?” [yeah, are you the woman from the bar]

“mhm, soy yo,” she answered. she grabbed the phone from the console table and brought it around the corner to sit in her chair by her big kitchen window; the weather was perfect for her: sunny with some big clouds here and small clouds there, not too humid or dry. she just watched the leaves dancing between the wind and focused on how peaceful the world seemed from inside her temporary home. [it’s me]

“nunca supe tu nombre,” he replied while inhaling sharply as he took a hit of his cigarette, “¿cómo se llama, dulzura?” [you never told me your name / what’s your name sweetheart]

she couldn’t fight the laugh that surfaced from the base of her throat as the nickname surprised her. “¿dulzura? mmm, no me hagas colgar, javi.” [sweetheart? don’t make me hang up]

“¿qué?” he laughed along with her, “tenía que llamarte algo, ¿no?” [what? i had to call you something]

“¿me llamaste así a tus amigos?” [you called me that to your friends]

“¿no te gusta? okay, okay, veo.” [you don’t like it? i see]

“no, no es que me no guste. es simplemente… sorprendente, eso.” [no, it’s not that i don’t like it. it’s simply surprising, that’s all]

neither of them could swallow their smiles behind their receivers. they talked for hours, and she still managed to keep her name a secret for the time being. he quickly got in the habit of calling her dulzura and it grew on her just as fast. the way spanish flowed off of his tongue made her cave deeper and deeper into her chair, having to “readjust” her legs a few times to resist her urges to tell him how sexy his was.

“javier…”

his throat was straining from all the talking and laughing they were doing but he ignored it by inhaling cigarette after cigarette. “¿sí, mama?” he cooed quietly.

the way the new little nickname from his lips gave her goose skin and a flushed face, and she was thankful he wasn’t in front of her in that moment because she just might have giving up on her wait and see rule.

“tengo que ir, tengo que ayudar a mi amiga mañana. pero… fue encantador hablar contigo.” [i have to go, i have to help my friend in tomorrow. but it was lovely talking with you]

“yo veo. voy a despertarme temprano mañana también. una cosas más.” [i see. i gotta get up early tomorrow as well. one more thing]

she giggled, somehow already knowing what he was going to ask about. “me llama genie.” [my name is genie]

“genie… ya has hecho realidad mi deseo, dulzura,” he flirted. [you’ve already made my wish come true, sweetheart]

“obtienes dos más, cariño,” she teased. it wasn’t the first time someone used her name as punchline in attempt to flirt with her, and it sounded just as corny coming from javi. the only difference was that she liked it coming from him because he wasn’t trying to hide how bad the joke was, whereas most men try to make it sound original as if they’re fucking poetic legends. javi knew he made stupid jokes and didn’t shy away from it. he didn’t try to put on some stupid façade (at least not with her). [you have two more, love]

“¿dos deseos más? debe ser mi día de suerte.” [two more wishes? it must be my lucky day]

genie gave him a sweet giggle, whispering, “hasta luego, javi.” [later]

“buenas noches, genie.” [good night]

-

it was like night and day, her first impression of javier was that he was just some man trying to find his way in life, in colombia. she got a real glimpse of him tonight: they got to the bar about an hour ago, and to the other men nearby it was like javier wasn’t even there. they’d stroll up to the table and flirt, hard.

she was trying to be polite and avoid a scene by saying thank you, but i’m not interested or i’m here on a date with this gentleman, but there are other pretty girls around who i’m sure are single.

after the fourth guy, though, javi became noticeably irritable, and well… lost his temper at the fifth guy. genie told herself that they were lucky to not get kicked out after javi’s already bruised fist knocked the other man flat on his skinny ass, but it shook her a bit. a man so sweet and so kind to her yet so violent with others. as fucked up as it was she found it a bit of a turn on, but couldn’t help but wonder if maybe one day he’d lose his temper with her.

all her worries swam away when he sat back down and apologized, a look of pure embarrassment pooling his eyes.

“sorry, i don’t know what took over me,” he whispered, “if you want to go home that’s perfectly fine—“

“javi,” she cooed, “you’re fine.” and she meant it. she not only saw his resentfulness, she felt it radiating off of him. she didn’t want the night to be spoiled by some fuckers who lacked respect. “honestly if every girl was coming up here asking you for a buck and a blowjob i’d probably punch one of them too. no, i would do it.”

“you’re not mad?”

she scrunched her face up and grabbed her drink, raising it to her lips and sipping before she said, “fuck no. well, not at you. it’s not like this is our first real date, anyways. the real one will come soon, i hope.” she gave him a tight smile that showed off parts of her teeth showing javi that she was hopeful and willing to try again. “ugh, i hate saying that.”

“what?” he took a swig of his whiskey.

“‘it’s not our real first date.’ god, that just sounds like i’m crapping on this.”

“no it doesn’t. that’s what we said this was, right? not a first date? just two new friends hanging out?”

she snickered at him. “uh-huh, do two friends just hanging out get jealous and possessive over each other?”

he rolled his eyes wonderingly and bit back a smile. “you know what i mean.”

“sureee i do… then you won’t mind if i go out there and dance, hmm?” she pointed behind herself with her thumb. she wanted to toy with him a little to see what kind of man he was so that she knew how to navigate him.

she only received a squinting glare in response as he asked her to elaborate with his eyes, so she ever so slightly rose up from her chair to lean over the table. his face relaxed at her close proximity, maintaining eye contact with the vixen before him.

“for other guys? since we’re just friends right now, that won’t bug you, right?” she gave him no time to respond as she gave him a kiss so endearing that it swept his mind clear of any thoughts that didn’t include her. she almost moaned at the lingering taste of whiskey and cigarettes on his lips, craving him even more now. the kiss felt like an escape from all of her troubles. she only needed this moment of control and then he could have the rest of her — something she’d never give to anyone else. the kiss was over before it even began, and he found himself simpering for her. “can i go dance for other guys, javier?”

he could only nod like a coward.

javi watched how her thighs glowed underneath the yellow lights as she danced shamelessly in the bar they first met in. he couldn’t take his eyes off of her in the white sundress with her blow dried hair flowing around her shoulders and cheekbones. she wasn’t drunk, no, not even tipsy so he knew that she was just a free spirit with the way she was acting, she spoke her mind and let her body express itself uncaring of the other people in the bar that stared.

he liked the fact that other men were staring at her because even though she was dancing where everyone could watch, she was only dancing for javi to see. he also enjoyed it when a man would approach her and she would just dance her body away from them as it confirmed her growing loyalty to him.

sure she’d forgiven his lack of self control earlier, but now he knows that he doesn’t need to act out to get her attention because he already has it. he didn’t quite understand what was so intriguing about genie, but he wanted to explore her depths (and not just in a sexual way).

he stood up to strut over to her after drinking the rest of his whiskey; he clasped his arms around her waist from behind and took in a deep breathe of her sweet perfume which contrasted the woodsy perfume he noticed her wearing when he gave her his number. he planted a needy but light kiss on the curve where her neck met her shoulder, pressing his hips into her butt firmly before swaying and bouncing with her to the upbeat song.

“people are staring at you, dulzura,” he whispered huskily onto her ear lobe. “these men think you’re single. can’t have that.”

she couldn’t help the cocky grin that spread across her face. “i saw the way you were looking around the room, smiling like you own the place…” she turned around in his tight grasp staring into his territorial eyes with an innocent, but knowing look. “like you own me.”

“i don’t own you, darlin’,” he says monotonously, not even the slightest hint of humor behind his tone, “but i do control you. at least for the night.”

“you can be the boss, daddy.”

she watched the surprise waiver his once stern expression and rather than playing her usual confident self she couldn’t ignore what he said.

i do control you.

she wanted to let him take the reigns on this one and see what javier peña was all about. after all, wait and see was far out of the window at this point.

she just pouts with her eyes and brows and folds her lips between her teeth like she had no idea the effect she had on him. she felt his warm hand slide down to the small of her back, gripping into the clothed skin desperately while he hissed at her facial expression and her dumb eyelashes batting up at him.

she filled him with what felt like so much destitution it was beginning to irritate him. the wanting to take it slow. the giggles and smiles. the dresses—god, he just craved fucking her in that little white sundress. how so much woman fit into one person was beyond him, but he looked at her like she was god created just for him.

yeah… waiting wasn’t happening.

the two of them ran out to his car like a pair of schoolchildren, and javi almost hit other cars or pedestrians at least twice on the way back to his apartment. she just laughed and told him to slow down, the few shots of dark liquor she had getting to her carefulness a bit.

next thing they knew they were naked on the couch, just kissing. that’s all they needed to do. just feel each other’s impure warmth. their lips were far beyond numb but they still went at it. she clung to him like wet on water, and he held her close with his sturdy forearms atop his lap while she rocked her hips occasionally. she poured every moan into his salivating mouth and he swallowed them with pride.

they were in no rush to have sex, they just wanted to need each other for a little bit. their craving for each other exceeded physical intimacy and stretched into every curve of their being as they wept onto each other. she giggled every time she felt more of her juiced pool onto his erection that was nestled between her legs and curved up to her ass. he loved her moans and her giggles and her smiles so much that he found himself smiling with her more than he had with his recent partners.

“javi?” she asked softly after finally pulling away from their hour-long kiss. he hummed and looked at her through his low eyelashes, seemingly drunk off of her kisses. “¿crees que podemos esperar un poco más?” [do you think we can wait a little longer]

he frowned, feeling a tad offended that she seemed a little scared to ask him that. “sí, dulzura. no tienes que preguntar.” he pinched her chin lightly and dragged his fingers around her soft face. [you don’t have to ask]

“no quería asumir.” [i don’t want to assume]

he offered her a loving smile and brought one of her hands up to his lips. “yo puedo esperar, mama.” [i can wait]

she blushed at the compassionate stare he was giving her and rewarded him with a tender kiss on his lips and another one to his forehead. “¿tienes agua?” [do you have water]

“mm-hmm. solo agua de la llave.” [only tap]

she carefully stood up from his thighs and stepped from between his legs to the kitchen. “no soy exigente.” she took it upon herself to grab a couple of glasses from his cabinet and them up up halfway with lukewarm water before she peered her head to her right to find a ring sitting in a small bowl nearby. “javier?” she called, unable to take her eyes off of the jewelry. he hummed and she heard as he stood up from the couch and walked towards her. “are you married?” she asked, finally breaking her stare from the ring and looked at him. [i’m not picky]

he eyebrows knitted together and he gave her a dumbfounded look. “no, why?”

“who’s ring is that then?”

he followed her pointed thumb with his eyes and saw how the ring was perched on top of the junk bowl like a trophy. “shit,” he whispered, glancing at his floor bashfully. “uh, no, genie i am not married. i was engaged, but, i left her… the day of the wedding.”

she couldn’t tell why, but she grew worried. “why?”

shrugging, he couldn’t come up with an answer. “i’m still trying to figure that out myself… i guess i kept the ring hoping it’d give me answer,” he laughed incredulously at his confession. “that was definitely not how i wanted you to find out.”

she nodded and a sense of relief came to calm her down. “i run all the time too,” she replied, waiting a moment before holding out the glass for him to take. he found solace in her words even though he didn’t fully understand it yet. he took a lame sip of his water and set it down on the counter before closing the gap between their still feverish bodies. “we don’t need to talk about it.” her tone was so serious but her smile was playful. “we can just make out for another hour or something.”

they laughed at her suggestion, but just as javi was leaning into kiss her as an acceptance his phone rang. he rolled his eyes and groaned before walking over to answer it. genie didn’t want to eavesdrop so she just strolled over to steal a cigarette from him and walked to his bedroom to blow her smoke out of his screen-less window whilst she looked over the other apartments and the streets. she heard a few gunshots far away and poked her nosy head out to see if she saw something, and when she didn’t she just kept looking around quickly forgetting about it.

it is colombia after all.

she was almost done with her cigarette when javi made an appearance next to her also holding a cigarette.

“everything okay?” she asked, glancing up at him. he nodded and grinned down at her nipples perking up from the cool breeze. “take a picture, perv,” she teased once she realized he was staring, then kicked his calf gently.

“maybe i will, smartass.”

she shook her head and laughed indulgently as he pointed his polaroid up to her naked body that was being illuminated by the orange street lights. he laid the photo on his dresser before hugging her from behind like earlier, and he swayed their nude bodies to music that was heard playing from another house in the distance. she hummed and tossed her cigarette outside before stealing his right off of his pouted lips; he took the liberty of his mouth as opportunity to kiss her shoulders.

she wanted him so badly, but she knew it was just her wound of impatience waiting to be peeled open again. she wasn’t afraid of giving in to him. she was afraid of giving in to herself. javier didn’t make it easy at all, and he saw it, but he just couldn’t help himself.

“mi dulzura…” he breathed onto her hot flesh, trailing his lower lip up to her ear and smacking a kiss on it while his hand found the base of her stomach. she felt herself clench around nothing and moved his hand down to her clit before she could stop herself. he wanted nothing more than to make her feel good and she just gave him permission for that in some aspect. “tu coño todavía está tan mojada… tengo suerte, ¿no?” he rubbed tiny little circles around her clit the same way she would when she’d touch herself. [your pussy is still so wet. i’m lucky, huh]

“alguien podría vernos.” she worried like she wasn’t the one to initiate it. [someone could see us]

he waited a moment to respond. “que nos vean.” [so let them see]

she gave in and let him please her for the whole world to see. the pads of his fingers felt like heaven on her heat as she let go of the fear of getting caught; she leaned her head back onto his shoulder and closed her heavy eyes.

javier wanted to felt her tremble in his arms and hear her call his name. he needed to give her a reason to come back and he knew he could do that with his fingers alone. just like he said: he could wait. and he would wait for her. she was gentle and kind but fearless at the same time. he thought it was sexy the way she never cared what anyone thought of her (anyone she wasn’t familiar with anyways).

“¿te gusta?” [you like that]

she simply nodded rapidly as her chest heaved, her mind straying from reality as she sank deeper into the trap he laid with his fingers. her eyes flew open, however when she heard a group of people walking nearby. “javi,” she panicked, “deberíamos mover—“ [we should move—]

“shut up,” he whispered in her ear through gritted teeth while simultaneously wrapping his free hand around her elongated neck, “tengo esto.” [i got this]

genie moaned louder than she realized and allowed herself to no longer care after javi made his demands. if the people wanted a show then they were going to get it. “claro, después de todo… eres el jefe, papi.” [sure, after all, you’re the boss daddy]

-

weeks of harmony went by, and even the bad moments weren’t so bad. sometimes javier would meet genie after a shit day at work and wouldn’t be in the mood for company, but he didn’t want to push her away because of it. he still wanted her near and she saw that despite feeling like sometimes she had to walk on eggshells around him on his moody nights. she didn’t mind it too much, it was more of her still trying to learn how to read him which came with some difficulty.

he knew that when they went almost a week without seeing other and constantly missing each other’s phone calls that he was falling hard from how much he missed hearing her voice. genie filled her free time with her friends and gardening but her mind always trailed back to javi.

they’re schedules finally aligned on a tuesday; javi got the day off and wanted genie to meet his partner steve so she took it upon herself to have them over for dinner along with aimee.

“hi, i’m genie,” she introduced excitedly as she shook the man’s hand before inviting them in.

“hey, i’m steve. sorry my wife couldn’t be here tonight,” he said.

genie just waved him off. “oh, don’t worry about it. i’ll make some extra for her if that’s alright?”

“sure, thank you.”

“my friend aimee is here in the other room, feel free to make yourself at home. dinner should be ready in about an hour.” he excused himself and genie turned to javi and immediately gave him a sultry kiss. “mm, i missed you.”

he chuckled and wiped the corner of his mouth before giving her a hug. “i missed you too. how ya doing?”

“better now,” she whispered. “come help me in the kitchen?”

“not sure i can be much help.” he watched her hips bounce back and forth as she led him to her kitchen. “you have a nice home,” he commented; he walked behind her and enveloped her body into a warm hug as she stirred the sauce in her pot.

“thank you.” he gave her neck a few kisses, placed his fingers on her chin to turn her head toward him, and pecked her lips a few times. she blushed and focused on her cooking again, but javi wanted to play with her again as it had been too long since the last time he’d heard her delicious moans. “javier,” she hissed and he just slid his large hands into her tight jeans. “javi,” she laughed, “we are not having a repeat of last time.”

“you’re right, this time we’re not doing it in a window, we’re in your kitchen,” he teased after his fingers found her wetness and dove into it.

she exhaled softly and felt her nipples harden against the fabric of her shirt. “i don’t wanna mess up dinner.”

“focus on dinner then, baby, don’t think about me,” his voiced strained. she nearly laughed again but couldn’t because a moan nearly surfaced. she brought a bowl of diced onions over the pot and let them fall in as an attempt to distract herself. “i’m sure dinner will be lovely, dulzura.” his breath hitched up against her ear when he felt her clench around his fingers. “what are you making?”

“lasagna.”

“it smells good.”

“thank you—oh.” she accidentally smacked the spoon on the counter and sauce flew specks around the wall and stove. “shit!” she reached for a towel and immediately bent forward to wipe the mess up, but she only applied more pressure between her sex and his digits. he took the liberty to ram his fingers as fast as the angle would allow which had her struggling to stand straight, but she continued cleaning her mess up—well, her javi-induced mess. once she was done she put the lid on the pot and told him that she was close.

“already? seems like you needed this more than me. is that right?”

“yes,” she huffed, gripping the ledges of the countertop. “right there.”

“you’re doing so good keeping quiet.”

“me corro, me corro!” she breathed out. she swallowed every other noise that tried to leave her fragile body while her orgasm took over. it was strong and overpowering almost, unlike most of her orgasms that were slow and drawn out. she felt every bit of her climax in the span of just a few seconds but it was well worth it. [i’m cumming]

javi eased up on her fairly quickly and freed his hand, careful to not get any of her cum on her clothes. she tried to steady her body while she resumed dinner and he washed his hands before helping her trembling hands with the heavy pot. they didn’t say anything but they could not stop giggling.

“are you guys stoned or something?” aimee asked spooking the couple.

“we’re literally dea agents,” steve retorted as he stood next to her.

“eh,” genie edged receiving a warning look from javi. “are you?”

“genie,” javi hissed.

“don’t worry, i won’t tell steve about the time you and i got high before watching star wars.”

“really peña?” steve questioned accusingly.

javi gave genie’s ass a light smack, but he knew steve would ultimately forget about it so he just went back to watching genie cook.

the night went by slow which made genie happy. she got to bond with steve and aimee got to bond with javi. it was like the formation of a new, happier, stronger family for genie and she hoped everyone else felt the same way. aimee and steve teased the other two about how smitten they were being all night and how cute it was to see the love they have for each other growing. they all got a little tipsy from whiskey and wine which caused the formation of a brother-sister relationship with steve and aimee — one that javi and genie found adorable, especially with the way they bullied each other for their music tastes and political views in a chaste way.

when the night was closing in steve and aimee made their exits to their significant others and homes, and aimee naturally made the comment, “don’t be too loud now,” more than once.

as soon as they were alone, genie and javi made their debut to her room for pillow talk and cuddles having gotten their release of sexual tension out earlier.

“do you think they heard me?” genie worriedly asked.

“i think we’d know if aimee heard us,” javi quip, snickering as he did so.

“good point.”

genie admired all of his facial features which made him smile keenly. he was handsome, smart, romantic, and caring, but he was also daunting and reserved for everyone but her. she wouldn’t dare resist love from someone so sweet after she experienced a life in the absence of love. javier gave her all the smiles she needed for one lifetime already, but his desire to keep that smile on her face earned him a special place in her fragmented heart because he was making it whole again.

“do you want to keep seeing me? i’m just checking in, making sure we’re all good.” javi’s insecure tone put a frown on her face.

“i do. i like you.”

he blushed and crawled on top of her. “yeah? you like me?”

“yeah i like you a lot, papito. te quiero mucho, papito.”

he closed the space between their lips and he snaked his arms around her back. he felt closer than before to the woman below him because she forgave his sins faster than he did himself. he didn’t know what he did to get this lucky, but he refused to question one of the only good things in his life.

“te quiero, genie,” he whispered, nuzzling his nose along hers.

“me encanta la forma en que dices mi nombre… y la forma en que me besas… la forma en que me tocas. me gustas mucho, javi, no sé lo que haría sin ti.” [i love the way you say my name… and the way you kiss me… the way you touch me. i like you a lot, javi, i don’t know what i’d do without you]

-

days later javier ended up getting sent home for playing with the enemy, and it left genie in a state of uncertainty. part of her blamed him for the new distance placed between them but she also knew she didn’t understand everything nor did she want to. in this case ignorance was bliss for her.

they set time aside every couple of weeks to keep up with each other for phone calls and she even began considering moving back to the states to be with him, but her loyalty to beth always pushed those thoughts aside. he worried about genie often because her mental health seemed to decline with how much more she was taking care of the sick woman. he’d never ask her to stop knowing he’d do the same for his own family, but once he got put on the case for the cali cartel he knew him being there would put her in good spirits. at least he hoped so.

it had been nearly a year since they’d last seen each other and he wanted it to be a surprise. from what steve had told him she never really moved on despite javi telling her it was okay and that staying friends was best for them for the time being. it angered her how easy he seemed to want to give up, but this wasn’t a fairytale and she knew that it may have very well been years until she was able to see him again so she understood.

genie became more reclusive, only ever seeing her few friends in the foreign state. she and aimee lacked the mental drive to go out and party like they did in the earlier stages of their arrival so beth, steve, connie, and cory were the only other people they spent time with.

javi knocked on her door and as he stood there waiting for an answer he drummed his fingers over his clad thighs. would she look different? would someone else answer the door? would she not want to see him right now? all these thoughts that ran through his head a million miles per hour vanished when he saw that pretty sundress appear before him.

“javier?” she asked softly as if he were unrecognizable.

“it’s me,“ he whispered hoarsely. her beauty sucked all of the air out of him and his body turned to mush when she collided into his broad frame. “it’s me.” he clung to her and breathed her in like she was a wasting memory.

“¡te extrañé, javi! te extrañé mucho.” [i missed you]

“también te extrañé, dulzura,” he whispered into her hair. “i came to surprise you.” [i missed you too]

“come in,” she urged. she ran upstairs to her bedroom and practically dragged him with her. “i need you,” she told him breathlessly. “can i have you?” he simply pressed his soft lips to hers as permission; they ripped their clothes off of each other and she laid him on her bed. just then everything fell back into place.

all of the midday to midnight conversations they had developed meaning. there was no doubt in her mind that her waiting wasn’t pointless or a waste of time. it meant something to the both of them and they wanted to permeate it.

she reached between their bodies and gave his already hard cock a few slow strokes to build up the anticipation. “are you mine?” she asked, a hint of possession in her eyes.

he felt like his soul mended to the shape of hers, her spirit captivating every corner of his mind. he nodded helplessly. “yes,” he moaned with his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“were you loyal to me?” she teased her entrance with his tip, sliding it in slowly.

“yes, i was l—loyal to you.” he couldn’t stop gasping; just the feeling of her slick walls around the first inch of him had him on edge. “i promise.” just then she sunk onto him without further question and felt her wetness pool around him as he stretched her out. they let out sweet moans for each other and began kissing as she bounced on him. “fuck, ya vas a hacer que me corra.” [you’re going to make me cum (already)]

she giggled, lifted herself up, then put her hands on his stomach for better balance. “dame tu leche, papi.” [give me your cum]

he threw his head back while cursing loudly, giving her plump ass a tight squeeze and refusing to let go. “necesito que me des tu leche lindo primero.” [i need you to give me your pretty cum first]

genie groaned and pinched her nipple lightly, feeling the sensitivity spiral down to her pussy. “ven aquí.” he sat up and ran his warm hands over the goosebumps on her back. “lamer mis pezones.” [come here / lick my nipples]

“yeah?” he licked a teasing strip up one of her nipples, giving her puppy dog eyes. “¿quieres que te me lama los pezones?” she hummed at his question and fluttered her eyes shut when he began sucking one and used his thumb to rub circles on the other one, his mustache grazing her skin adding to the pleasure. she continued her rhythm on top of him while he kept her steady. he felt his eyes light up at the sight of her. sweaty, eager, desperate. he knew that he never wanted to feel anyone else do this for him, and no one could make him feel nearly as good. he had to let his mind wander from time to time because of how close he was getting to cumming inside of her. he didn’t want this to end so soon. he wanted this to be the memory she touched herself to whenever he couldn’t be around. he needed the feeling of his thick cock stretching and pleasing her slick cunt to be engraved so deeply into her mind that the thought of it alone would make her cum on her own fingers. “eres tan jodidamente perfecta, mama. so fucking perfect.” [you want me to lick your nipples / you’re so fucking perfect]

she loved the way he cowered his face into her chest as a way to feel more of her and the way he kissed up her sternum until his lips met hers. he cradled her in his arms so that he could switch their positions wanting to see how good he could make her feel. he freed her face of loose hair strands and gave her tiny kisses while he started slowly inside of her, not fully inserting himself in while doing so. genie loved everything about this moment.

javi with messy hair.

how sheen and warm their bodies were from sex and not the humidity.

the cool breeze that often snuck in through the open windows.

javi worshiping her body.

how pretty her body looked under the sun.

how careful and attentive he was with her.

their heavy breathing

and moans

and pants

and whimpers.

javi knew he couldn’t hold back much longer so he pulled out to bury his face between her thighs. she let out an ungodly sound as he opened his mouth as wide as possible and sucked up everything. she clawed at his scalp with her back arching off the bed not able to form any words at the sudden sensation.

he slurped as he closed his mouth and flattened his tongue on her throbbing clit, roughly shaking his head side to side tickling the skin around her clit with his facial hair (and it drove her insane). she tried to squeeze her shaky thighs around his head but his sturdy arms wouldn’t allow that. she cried out his name and let the vibrant and warm and forceful feeling take over he flailing body. her body shook so hard the bed creaked with the headboard smacking the wall a few times. she had no time to recover when he filled her up with his throbbing length and continued her orgasm by rubbing his fingers around her wet clit.

“hazte correrme otra vez,” she pleaded. he rammed into her and held her legs up while she perched on her elbows. [make me cum again]

“¿quieres otra más? hmm,” he grunted. [you want to cum again]

“yes, fuck—fuck. you’re gonna make me cum again!” he rested on top of her, laying her flat down again. he fondled her breast briefly but moved his hand up to her cheek to caress it. “can you cum with me?” she asked; his eyelids battered down and he nodded. she felt his body jerk and she grinned at his flushed face. “¿tú estás corriendo?” [are you cumming]

“mm. mm-hmm,” he moaned, “solamente para ti.” she felt her mouth go dry and his thrusts lose a steady rhythm. his hips dug into her thighs and his cock pulsed when her pussy began convulsing against him. [just for you]

she pouted up at him when he pressed their foreheads together and felt dizzy until that one second of pure stillness carried her body up and back down to reality again. she forced her heavy eyelids open to see him in her most vulnerable state of mind as a way to let him know he had her always and forever. she held onto him tightly, letting out whimpers of overstimulation that turned into exaggerated moans when she couldn’t hold onto the feeling anymore. he got there not too long after, but instead his focus sharpened on her rather than hazed; he thrusted sloppily into her exhausted body and gave her body every last drop of cum he had saved up for her.

their breathing synchronized as they just laid together; he made sure she felt loved when he pressed a few plump kisses over her face, feeling his heart punch against his ribs every time she cooed at his lips on her damp skin.

he carried her to the bathroom so that they could shower together and they didn’t even realize neither of them said anything for the next half hour until they climbed back in bed.

“doing alright?” he asked her as he lit her cigarette up.

she smiled with her eyes and nodded, pressing her back to her headboard. “you?”

“yeah… honestly thought i was gonna have to put up more of a fight to get in bed with you,” he teased. she nudged his foot with hers and laughed. “i came back for you,” he said once the mood shifted.

“i thought about leaving beth and going to you.”

“i know. steve told me,” he admitted. “i wouldn’t want you to do that. sounds like she needs you and aimee more than ever right now.”

“yeah.”

“hey.” he held her chin then gave her a kiss. “i’m here now.” he wiped a tear that fell onto her cheek and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “i’m here now.”

-

“you’re being so fucking loud right now, shut up,” genie scolded. she covered his mouth with her left hand and choked him with the other. he shook his head in protest but gave up when she resumed riding him in the office chair. he tangled his fingers in her hair and pulled even harder as he shot his release inside of her. she finished him off and they had a brief make out session before he tapped her hip.

“how much time we got?” he asked before pulling his pants up and fixing his shirt.

“uh… ten minutes."

“i bet i can make you cum in five,” he challenged.

her eyes widened and she pressed a hand to his chest. “that is a dangerous game you’re trying to play.”

“come on, can’t you make me feel like the boss here for a few minutes?”

his smile won her over and he received the biggest ego boost when she lifted the skirt to her dress. “five minutes.”

he got down on his knees and smirked at her paranoid expression. “an orgasm per minute?”

“shut up.” she pushed his face into her slippery heat, mewling at the curl of his wide fingers and flick of his thirsty tongue. “move to the left… right there.” she held his face in position and watched his tongue work miracles along her clit. the squelching of her discharge mixed with his semen around his fingers was louder than she expected, and she worried about people walking by hearing them.

javi knew how to work the divots and curves of her more than she wanted to give him credit for, and knowing how crunched they were on time he focused on the spongy hill that’d get her to her climax fast especially when combined with tongue despite how badly wanted to taste for hours.

she didn’t warn him or let out any noise other than a few deep breaths, but he could tell by the way her hips jerked on his face and the locking of her knees that she was already cumming. seconds later he felt all he had given her pool around the base of his knuckles. after removing his fingers he licked her and his fingers clean before helping fix her dress.

“come on, we’ll make out in the parking lot,” he whispered to her with that everlasting smirk that she pretended to hate.

“i am never doing that again, that was too close,” she told him once they made it to her car.

“you loved it,” he said confidently. “come ‘er.” his face carried the scent of her and it made her feel good knowing that he’d have to walk around like that for the rest of the day. they kiss until another officer makes fun of javi for becoming a one-woman man to which he just waved off. “ignore them,” he chuckled dryly. “admit that you loved it.“

genie rolled her eyes and a smile crept on her face. “you’re wrong,” she said tugging at his shirt and pulling him in, “but you’re so much fun.”

they kissed once more before saying their goodbye’s and parting ways. when javier made it back to his desk steve could tell he seemed much happier than he was an hour ago.

“fuck are you grinning for?” steve interrogated. the brunette gave him a noticeably fake look of surprise. “what? did you have genie come up here and give you a blowie?” steve huffed and leaned forward when javi’s face went pale. “dude! i was joking!” he whispered harshly.

“do not tell anyone else.”

steve muttered something under his breath but then looked back at his partner through his eyebrows. “where’d you do it?”

he smirked, leaning forward on his elbows. “go big or go home, right?”

“oh-ho-ho!” steve laughed proudly. “you dirty son of a bitch.”

-

“how you holding up?”

genie gave him an endearing look and said, “i’m alright. i miss her a lot already, i’m just glad i got to be with her in her final moments.” he nodded slowly at her answer, watching her pick the strawberries from her garden as they sat together in the grass. “how are you doing? you know with work?”

“i’m managing.”

she rolled her eyes from him back to the garden. “don’t do that.”

“do what?”

“i’m managing,” she mocked in a peculiar tone. “you can talk about it.”

“i don’t want you to feel like i’m ignoring your feelings, though.”

she glared at him and adjusted her posture. “i’m sad, not broken. plus, i asked because i care about you. we’re not just flirting anymore, javi. i thought this was becoming something.”

“this is something.”

“okay so fucking talk to me. don’t tiptoe around me and give me two word responses because i lost beth a couple weeks ago. you don’t have to tell me what’s going on, but you’re not just managing. i wanna know what goes through your head.”

javi sighed and rubbed her back as she got back to work. “you’re right.”

“i know.”

he rolled his eyes but still gave the back of her head a kiss. “i’m thinking of retiring after cali’s done.”

“oh yeah? why’s that?”

she already knew why. the late nights, the constant losses, everyone dying… she saw how he clung to her metaphorically because she was the only stability he got to have every week but he tried hard to not become dependent on her. she appreciated his consideration, but it led to him being unable to vocalize his emotions which made her feel like there was an unnecessary barrier between them.

“can’t do it anymore. i want you to come back to texas with me when it’s done… if that’s something you want.”

she snorted and gave him a raised eyebrow. “you haven’t even told me you love me yet and you want me to move with you?” she was joking, but he noticed how her eyes bored into his as if she was waiting for him to say it.

he thought it over every time he was away from her — was genie just an impulse for him? just another woman? and every time he questioned it his heart screamed no. she could be bratty, lord knows, but she wasn’t complicated. she was sweet and so full of life that she gave some to him and it made him feel warm inside again. she loved all things and all people, she never judged yet she always stood her ground. she could be needy at times when he wasn’t in the mood for attentiveness but she always waited. he didn’t want to keep her waiting any longer.

“i do love you,” he responded nonchalantly, a frown reaching his brows.

she sat her basket down and turned to face him. “you’re just saying that.”

“no i’m not.” her smile faded momentarily, but came back even bigger; he held her face gently and kissed her blushing nose. “genie, mi amor, te amo tanto te esperaría por siempre. i loved you before i even knew who you were.”

“oh,” she pouted, “you break my heart.” she kissed him and sat on top of his lap whilst reaching for his belt buckle to undo it.

"mm, lemme take you inside," he mumbled against her shiny lips.

"right here," she begged quietly; she pulled her sundress over her head which made javi's eyes touch the back of his skull when he noticed she had no panties on. she didn't bother ridding him of his tight jeans. she just pulled out his velvety cock and teased it along her opening, waiting until he was fully hard to sink onto him. she rested her weight on top of him after he opened the rest of the buttons on his shirt, pressing her lips to his. "tell me again," she demanded. she wasted no time to rock her hips at a quick and eager pace as she lusted after the feeling of his cum painting her wet, rubbery walls.

"i love you." he twitched and moaned weakly beneath her, her movements sending shocks and tickles up his spine. he repeated it more than a dozen times like a broken record and boy was the noise music to her ears.

she whimpered against his neck and her hips chased his orgasm more than hers before she whispered, "i love you," back to him. "i love you, i love you, oh, i lo-love you!" she shouted without a care in the world and watched him through weighted eyes. he held her hips in place and fucked her back, ignoring the strain in his thighs from the fabric restricting his range of motion. "i love you, i love the way you fuck me!"

"you take it so good, dulzura." he pinched her cheeks between his palm and fingers causing him to lose his leverage inside of her, however it didn't stop him. he loved seeing how weak he made her: the way she just molded into him no matter how far he'd bent her or throw her around. he loved how red her face got when he squished it in his brawny hands. "that feel good?"

she nodded shyly in his grip. "yes, everything you do f-feels so fucking good."

"good," he boasted, "you're such a good girl for me, hmm... i love you."

"i'll always be a good girl for you," she told him; he felt his steady pace lose its rhythm and his cock twitched so hard and deep inside of her it felt like his skin had meshed with hers. "i'll always be a good girl for you because you're the boss of me."

fuck. he couldn't stop the arrival of his climax at her sinful confession, his cum pouring out of him seconds later with his head digging into the ground beneath him while he silently cursed at himself for cumming so easily. she liked it though and felt comfortable with leaving it off here. she knew he'd make it up to her later in whatever way she wanted. he asked to stay inside of her for just a little longer so that he could savor the moment and she happily obliged. she helped him escape his nerve-racking high by combing her hands through his hair and a firm kiss.

"my god..." his breathing jagged and his arm trembled around her bare waist. "you're gonna be the death of me one day."

"hmm, that's my job." she put her dress back on to sit next to him lazily pulling his jeans up over his slippery length. "you mean it? wanting me to come back with you to texas?"

he laid his head on her thigh after lighting a cigarette and fiddled with her hand. "course i am. i'll buy us a big farmhouse, and you can raise horses, goats, and shit. whatever you want. i'll make you tea every morning and rub your back when you wake up. we can go for walks and watch the sunset... whatever you want. that’s my second wish.”

"you are gonna be setting feminism back a few years if you keep sweet-talking me," she bantered. they shared a few laughs and smoked in silence for a while before he told her it doesn't have to be that. "mi amor... i'll follow you wherever you go. like i always say… you can be the boss."

"you gotta stop saying that. it makes my dick hard every time."

[sinner-sunflower]

Lucifer AU idea- Rabbit Hole

Y'all know that Rabbit Hole by Miku song with the animation trend? Imagine Luci doing that dance ugh

---------------------------

The song is Angel Dust's first official music video that he wrote after breaking free of Valentino's deal.

Ozzie had offered him a job to Club Ozzie's first Pride ring branch and Angel never felt happier.

He got into music as an outlet for his emotions, releasing 'Addict' and 'Poison' to the public via Al's radio show. (He managed to convince Alastor to do it cos it would make his ratings skyrocket past Vox and Alastor loves nothing more than kicking Vox when he's already down)

After the success of his first 2 songs, Angel decided that maybe the 3rd one should have a music video.

With the help of Ozzie as his producer, the project is a go.

Writing the song was the easy part. Angel wanted it to sound fun but also resonate with his past experiences (just read the translation of the lyrics! The one angel wrote is from this Cover!)

One day, he and Ozzie were brainstorming at the Sin's office at the Pride branch.

Ozzie: Angel, this is your first music video! It must be grand! Showstopping! Jaw-dropping! Never before seen! Revolutionary!

Angel: But how do I do that, big dick boss man? I don't think even being greatest porn star Hell has ever seen will wow people now. I've done lots of things and I can't think of anything else.

Ozzie: Hmmm

Just then, Lucifer enters the office.

Lucifer: Ozzie! Just who I'm looking for. I need you to do some inspection regarding your crystals. I just talked to Belphagor and she said that her team just confiscated a whole ton in some imp warehouse in Greed. I know I don't need to meddle but I wouldn't be worried if it was anywhere else. Who knows what Mammon is doing with those and- oh! Angel!

Angel: Heya, Short king.

Lucifer: What are you doing here?

Angel: I work here, baby~

Lucifer: Oh! I knew that haha. And what's this?

The King of Hell gestures to the board they were using for notes.

Angel: Don't tell anyone, but I'm gonna be releasin a new song and it's gonna have a music video!

Lucifer: Really?! That's great! It hasn't been that long too since Poison, wasn't it?

Angel: Yeah, but we wanna catch these motherfuckers off guard

Ozzie: That's why we're brainstorming how we can wow these desensitised demons. I still think we can do-

Lucifer: Why don't I do it?

Angel and Ozzie blink in surprise at the King's words.

Angel: Do what?

Lucifer: Act! In your music video! You know, instead of you, I'll be the uhhh 'rabbit girl'? Not that- you're uh- not enough I just mean that uhm- I think the last thing they'd expect is the King of Hell a sinner's music video.

Angel: Babe, you do know this would be a not safe for work type thing, right?

Lucifer: Yeah? I know? I know you better than you might think, you know.

Ozzie: You sure? Cos Charlie might see this.

Angel: Yeah. I know I don't wanna see my dad basically naked dancing to music.

Lucifer: You can go through it with her if it makes you feel any better. But I'm up for anything.

The two others in the room just stare at him with their mouths wide open.

Lucifer: But if you don't want I...

Angel: Hell no! We are doing this!

Ozzie: Hell won't know what hit em.

---------------------------

Charlie gave it a green light cos she's so excited about her dad finally socializing and breaking out of his cocoon to really realize what everything is about. Angel wants to record a reaction of the hotel for research purposes.

A few weeks later, the video is done and it's dropped out of nowhere.

Ozzie invited the Sins to the hotel for an exclusive live viewing (he and Angel ofc knew what time it would be released and set the whole thing up)

Everyone sat in the lobby in front of a giant projector (No, Alastor, you can't watch a video on the radio!), and as the clock struck at 9:13 AM on a random Tuesday, the video played.

Let's just say that it certainly did leave mouth agaped and caused mass panic.

---------------------------

Ozzie anonymously sent a copy to Heaven and somewhere in a bright glowing building, 6 archangels lay unconscious at the ground due to shock,

---------------------------

If you guys want me to write some dialogue for that first reaction in the hotel, drop the comment!

[agirlwithbigdreamsforher]

FOUND YOU IN A WORLD OF CHAOS: PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE

Pairing: Eric (AQPDO) x Mary (OFC)

Summary: Eric met Mary on the ferry that was taking them away from New York. What would the future holds when you are living the end of the world?

Warnings: Any mistakes are my own. For the purpose of the story there will be elements that probably are not in the franchise, sorry about that. We are not purist here hehehehe.

A/N: Literally obsessed with Eric after I watched the movie. He is so freaking cute. I hope you enjoy this.

Disclaimer: I do not give permission for any of my works to be copied, used, translated nor reposted anywhere else but here on this blog. Do not steal what you didn’t work for. Minors and ageless blank blogs don’t interact with me or my works. Reblogs and likes are always welcome. Remember reblogs do more than likes. Thank you for reading this work of fiction.

Word count: 965

GIF'S NOT MINE, YOU CAN FIND THE CREDITS UNDER IT.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Eric was running to get to the ferry that was going to take him out of the city while Sam distracted the creatures. He was holding Frodo against his chest and then he jumped into the water just as one of the creatures was about to catch him.

His entire body was tired, he hadn’t eaten or slept properly in the past couple of days; he didn’t know where he got the strength to swim. As he reached the ferry the people on it helped him to get on the boat.

“You’re safe.” A dark man told him as he patted his shoulder. “You’re safe.”

Eric’s eyes watered when he saw the smiles of the people surrounding him. He moved to a corner to rest for a bit holding his cat. Where are they going? He had no idea, all he knew was that he was still alive and it was all thanks to Sam. He knew himself, he knew that if he were alone the past few days he would’ve died at the hands of those things.

It was amazing how life can change so drastically in mere hours. He woke up that day to go to school to follow the path his father told him he needed to follow. A lawyer seemed like a grown up job and that’s what his dad expected from him, he wanted his son to grow up. The next thing he knew was that he was running for his life, hiding in the craziest places; and helping her friend to get pizza in the middle of a destroyed city.

As he read the note Sam left for him the words she wrote to him resonated in his head, he wished she had come with him. Sam was dying, he was aware of that, but he would hoped she died in a peaceful place and not in the middle of that chaos, and most importantly not alone.

“Hey.” The voice of a lady brought him back to reality, he was still shaking and tears were streaming down his cheeks. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” It was a middle aged woman with grey hair who smiled lovingly to him. For a moment Eric thought he was seeing his mom but of course that wasn’t possible. “You’re the one who just got here?” Eric nodded. “I’m Lucy, come with me.” Her voice was of a normal volume, no whispers, and no passing notes. Lucy walked passed him but he didn’t move.

“Come on.” Lucy told him.

Eric stood up and followed her to a lower level in the ferry; it will be the part where the cars would normally be. He noticed it was an improvised medical ward. Some men, women and children were there with bandages in different parts of their bodies.

“Sit.” Lucy said pointing to an empty chair. “What’s your name?”

“Eric.” He whispered.

“You don’t need to whisper here. You are safe, you can talk.” He nodded and looked away.

“I want to check on you. See if you are injured. Is that ok?”

“I’m not hurt.” His British accent passed his lips.

“I’ll feel better if you let me check on you. I’m a nurse and I wanna help.” Eric nodded and let her checked on him. Lucy tried to take his yellow sweater off of him but he flinch and grabbed her hand. “Not gonna hurt you.” Eric’s fear was shown through his eyes. “We’ll keep it on, ok?”

He nodded and let go of her hand. Lucy’s voice became distant as he looked around the room. Everyone was awake except for one person, a girl. This girl was sleeping on the floor next to the chair he was on, a blanket was covering her lower half. She seemed at peace, her brown hair all over the floor, dirt and dried blood on her face.

“You are not from around, are you?” Eric shook his head, “Did you have any family with you?”

“They’re in England… were… I don’t know.” Lucy nodded. “What happened to her?” He said pointing with his head towards her.

“She saved a kid and was attacked in the process. Her leg was injured.”

“Attacked by the creatures?”

“Yeap.” Lucy put a cotton with alcohol on a cut Eric had on his hand making him hiss.

“How is she alive?”

“Well the creature was going to attack the child, and she got in the way.” Lucy sighed, “That thing only managed to scratch her right leg with its claws or whatever they have. After that we hid and waited so we could scape and got here.” She smiled at Eric, “She passed out when we were stitching her wound. I gave some pain killers and she fell asleep.”

“Will she be alright?”

“I hope so.” Eric kept looking at her and Lucy noticed it. She finished bandaging his hand, “You’re all set.” She smiled proudly. “Nice cat, by the way.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re most welcome.” She stood up. “Now, I think you should go and tried to sleep too for a bit, you look like you need it.”

“I don’t know where…”

“Go one level up, and find a spot where you can lay down.”

Eric stood and got closer to see the girl, he noticed her things were above her head, a tote bag, her tennis shoes, a sweatshirt, and something that look like bloody ripped pants.

“You can come back later if you want. She will be here when you wake up.” Lucy smiled at him and he blushed when he was caught staring.

“Sorry.” He turned around and practically ran out of there. Lucy just shook her head.

“Hey Mary.” She whispered as she kneeled to check on her neighbor, “I believe someone wants to meet you.”

[hanasnx]

“I like it when you’re jealous,” you say as you take off his clothes. Anakin, through gritted teeth, “yeah and i’m getting real tired of it.” 🫠🤤🥴 I’m dead that what so hot!!! And omg please I would love for you to explore the idea of Anakin being jealous again, maybe how it would differ after him and the reader became an actual couple, if you have time ofc 💓💓💓

ill make time for steamy anakin romance any day anon— im so happy u told me what u liked most about that post!! it always makes me happy to know what lines got u :D

i needed a break from writing my halloween themed kinktober fic for anakin anyway ;)

☥ so anakin is obviously painfully aware of how sexy you are. his dick has ached for you more times than he can count. being so inexperienced before you meant being horny and being horny for you are synonymous bcos he conflates the two

so he thinks that a lot of other men feel that way about you too, even if he doesnt realize he thinks that way

☥ anakin is definitely toxic to an extent, so once you two become an actual couple im sure it’d be a problem that you have to face together.

☥ sometimes you don’t realize youre flirting, you’re naturally flirtatious as a personality trait, something youve adopted because it paid off in your last job, and it pays off now.

it’s a habit youre trying to break, and sometimes it slips out. and damn does it piss anakin off.

“you’re leading them on on purpose!”

“well it was necessary before! i’m still working on it, ani,”

“i think you like the attention.”

“oh? is that how you feel?”

“you get some sick satisfaction from guys thinking they have a chance with you.”

“and it doesn’t excite you that they never will?”

he side eyes you. “don’t turn this around like that,”

“c’mon, anakin, don’t you get some ‘sick satisfaction’ out of men thirsting after your girl only to be denied and forgotten?”

“you can’t say you whore yourself out to other guys for me.”

“but i can say you like having something no one else does.”

the way he fucking looks at you, tonguing his cheek with this heated glint in his eye. KDJF you better be ready to get fucked in half

☥ he gets so worked up over it, and you hate that he’s right about you liking the attention. it’s so tough to catch yourself in the act and clip it. anakin develops quite the routine with you

“i saw you talking with that scum like he had a shot. even if you weren’t with me you’d never even look in his direction. i’m starting to think it gets you off knowing you’ll be punished at home.” he’d tell you while he’s balls deep inside of you in a mating press

“ani! too deep! too deep!”

“i don’t care. you wanna act like a slut? take it like one.”

☥ this would happen so often that he pops a boner when he sees you flirting around. your hand bracing on a strangers arm when you laugh at their joke. letting them put a hand over yours on a table. whispering something naughty in your ear so you playfully hit them and meet anakin’s gaze from across the room.

like when a dog salivates at the sound of the dinner bell, anakin knows you just signed yourself up for being his personal toy tonight.

☥ “i bet he’s thinking about you, you know,” he’d tell you, while you were overstimulated and unraveling over him. his tip kissing your cervix mercilessly, thumb running over your clit, awaiting your next orgasm. “smiling at the thought of you. wondering when he’ll see you next. has no idea you’re here, getting fucked by your lover until you forget your own damn name.”

☥ being an actual couple means he has a little more reign in what he’s allowed to say to you, and what he’s allowed to do to you should you stray

its fun for him to reclaim you, and it’s fun for you to basically get a guaranteed rough fuck—

☥ “i can’t blame you for being so magnetic, princess, men flock to you ‘cause they’re human. it’s got me thinking,”

“about what, baby?”

“maybe if i fuck a baby into you, the question of if you belong to anyone’ll be answered.”

“ani—“

[artsybug0]

So to explain, the ai Actor Millie offered to ask Eddie to babysit my kid, and she called him her older brother but used quotations so like, 'older brother'. so that leads me to think she just means like they friends but have a sibling like relationship so i wanna ask, what is Actor Millie & Eddie's relationship like? Friends? Sibling? Sorry to bother but i just got curious, sorry! - V

Yes yes yes!! I’m so glad that worked!

Millie has a family like relationship with Eddie and Barnaby no matter the Au!!

Eddie is always an older brother figure to Millie

And Barnaby is like a father figure for her too!

Ofc Millie has a dad already (adopted) but Barnaby reminds her so much of him and because she no longer lives with her family she feels home sick but Barnaby helps with that so much!

Millie also is the eldest daughter so she didn’t really have an older sibling to take care of her like she took care of her younger brothers!

(Actor Au)

Millie is a little antisocial. Just a little! She often isolates herself and purposely sits away from people and read on her phone!

If you pay attention to her outside of “she’s hot” you’ll notice that she actually seems very lonely. Before and early in her acting career(?) she didn’t have much time to even make friends. She’s always running around working too many jobs not to mention she used to be in college (she barely graduated-)

Have you guys seen Frills video that shows Wally being tired and stressed from his job? And their post explaining how all of them worked their butts off only to barely make enough for rent and food?

IMAGINE THAT BUT NOT HAVING ROOMMATES-

So she didn’t have time to make many friends and the people that do interact with her usually are just because she’s “a pretty little thing”

Eddie took notice of this. Eddie is the most observant after all. He felt sad and guilty about how lonely Millie seems. Even though she denies and try’s to not act like it.

So Eddie decided to start inviting Millie to join them when they hang out (probably against Wally’s wishes lol. At this time he would of been still cold and distant from her because he doesn’t know her true intentions. He’s super protective over his friends so when she did start to hang out with them he kept an eye on her just in case. Millie was no exception to his cold behavior lol) and eventually they did become her actual friends. And she loves them all dearly and would do anything to keep them happy, healthy, and safe. (I really do mean anything- she’ll murder for them fr)

Also! Millie hates being picked up. She only tolerates it when it comes to people she cares about or a bodyguard she trusts (like Max!) it makes her feel vulnerable and not in control of the situation. But she actually genuinely loves being held by Barnaby. When she gets home sick she’ll ask him to hold her and he does! He holds her in his arms and she takes a nap. When hugging or cuddling for too long she’ll fall asleep haha! So she keeps hugs short usually.

[cemetery-irises]

liveblogging my idv pokemon outfit concept creation because i have no idea what i wanna do but people need to look like something!! (adding to this with pure unfiltered thoughts whenever i get an idea) (this will be so long forever even before i add to it be warned and mainly for archive purposes so i can look back at it for reference)

tldr: what the fuck am i doing i am so clueless on what these people should wear

emil - some sort of baggy, pastel coloured cardigan, probably pink/mint green with cream accents and grass stains probably fairly pale since theres little to no natural sunlight in both ballonlea and the tangle, and he uses a parasol otherwise, for his hair im thinking probably longer than canon?? not overwhelmingly so, but probably just above his shoulderblades. also he has little glowy freckles that are just mushroom spores as well as a morelull that kinda just. sits on his head

now the hard part..... everyone else........

frederick definitely has a suit with a train i think! he prefers to use fairy/ghost types (mecore) and i think it should reflect in what he wears while being elegant. he should get heeled boots methinks

for norton i kiinda wanna keep the self repaired aspects of his clothes. i like the slight stinginess of his personality and i think that his clothes reflect that well, because is there reaaallyy a point in buying new clothes if he could fix them himself and they still do their job........

ive no idea what to do with him though. not a clue....... i was thinking maybe leather or something to show he's a spikemuth local, but im not sure on it,,,

orpheus i just want to give a pretty monocle to and call it a day im so clueless on him. i wanna give his clothes dragon-y aspects though since he specializes in dragon types i'm just. not sure how to incorporate them yet

andrew.... ive been procrastinating on this for him....... for soo long..... im thinking he gets to wear a real big (though worn) hooded travelling cloak since it somewhat resembles a robe (or whatever the fuck you call his canon fit) with the iris remaining ofc, and he carries his mimikyu around in the hood whenever its not up. as a barefoot wanderer myself i think we all know what my first response is but i think he can pull off boots

grace...... grace is soo fucking preetty... ive no idea what to do with her either though, but the simple sort of charm fits her well i think. she could pull off literally anything though agghg

honestly i think ithaqua design is perfect already if you take away all his hunter-y aspects like the stilts and the mask (he might be able to keep his axe. as a little treat) nothing to say for now

luca balsa. the professors son. he has the new eccentric skin no comment. next

alva should wear a vest with rolled up sleeves i think. also he has long hair in a ponytail because i think he should and we were robbed because why is this 46 year old man putting hair gel in and slicking his hair back honest question

[songmingisthighs]

[9.14] baby!xikers (ft. teacher!sunmi)

⇀ truly, they are interesting children

⇁ @legohwas YOU WHO GASLIT ME THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT

⇁ disclaimer : the author is not forcing any ideas or form of relationship between irl characters. this fic is specifically for entertainment purposes

a/n : finally a standalone baby!xikers fic !!! and i know i used the term baby when i meant kindergarteners, but to me it sounds more adorable and that's still a baby. and i just had to put sunmi here bc wtf they're... adorable together ?? it's giving ateez but shy and still appearance conscious and ofc a whole new meaning to crackheadassery <3 but lookie @flowerboykun babies !!!!!

wc : 1.9 k

genre : fluff, baby!au

buy me coffee ?

After school hours, as parents tend to work longer hours or be busy until a little later, the school provides daycare until as late as 7 pm. Ten close-knitted children found themselves herded into a big classroom by their teachers because their parents were not going to be able to pick them up until later that day. As children of celebrities, this is not a rare occurrence nor is it a daily occurrence for them as schedules tend to change depending on their parents' availabilities. They had no problem with this, however, as they know what cool jobs their parents do for a living and they love spending time together. So even for Yechan who was merely 3 years old, they all were able to adapt to being in daycare rather quickly.

Right off the bat, after they all placed their belongings like school bags and the teachers helped the babies (Yechan and a struggling Yujun and Hunter) store their items in the cubbies, the children were assisted to have their lunch as per the program. The ten children really liked having their lunch at school as they got to eat together and spent their time with other school staff like the lunch ladies and even the groundskeeper when they spend time outside after lunch. Once back indoors after an hour of playing, the children grouped themselves with some others in a manner of activities that they shared their interests in. Sumin, Hunter, and Hyunwoo spent time colouring and drawing in one corner, Junmin, Seeun, Jinsik, and Yujun were doing physical activities like dancing and playing games, while Minjae, Junghoon, and baby Yechan are playing legos (Minjae and Junghoon are, Yechan was just holding onto one piece and staring at the two older boys in awe).

The teachers had yet to have any problems with the boys, as they were in fact the least of their teachers' problems. Compared to glue eaters, serial wet willy givers, booger wipers, and swing pushers, the boys' noise and occasional messiness when they're playing are not even a little bit of a problem. At most, the teachers would simply have to separate one child from another and even then, the same children would find themselves crawling back to each other, playing as if nothing had happened not ten minutes later. So days like this, days where the children sit around and play whatever it is that they wanna play together with their friends are not rare but still not underappreciated.

One of the more senior teachers, Sunmi, was tasked to handle the daycare that day which she usually does so happily, but this was the first time she had to handle the group. Nevertheless, she got into the classroom with a big smile and enthusiasm. "Hi, everyone!" she greeted after closing the door of the classroom. Hearing the familiar voice, Yechan snapped his head towards Sunmi and immediately dropped the Lego piece he was holding before bracing himself and making a run for to woman by the door, surprising Junghoon who had a hand forward, waiting for Yechan to hand him a piece of lego block. The little giggly baby was thankfully caught by Sunmi who propped him on her hip as soon as he was in her arms, used to him acting like that from the times she had taken care of his baby class. Yechan was followed by Yujun and Hunter who looked up at her with big eyes, "Are you gonna play with us, miss?" Yujun asked with a tilt of his head to which Sunmi answered with an enthusiastic nod of her head, "yes! I'm here to play and accompany you all until your parents get here! Now, who wants to tell me what they've been doing?"

Soon enough, Sunmi went around the room asking the boys what they have been doing until she got there (with Yechan stuck on her side be it in her arms, hugging her leg, or just tailing behind quietly). Other than Yechan whom she already had the pleasure of interacting with beforehand, Sunmi was able to know what each boy was like and who they were close with. Of course, the most questionable one in her opinion was Junghoon because he barely reacted to her and when asked, he said that he was making a ship that can help him survive another great flood. It was a simple flat surface. But she was grateful to see that Hyunwoo seemed to understand him well (maybe even enabled him). She also saw how Junmin was able to care for his younger friends while doing his own thing like telling Seeun to be careful as he almost kicked his brother Sumin in the face (and disproved how Sumin said "I can just kick him back"). The diversity of how the children played together was fun to see, no one was stuck on their phones and to Sunmi it was refreshing to see.

When she finished her rounds in the classroom, Sunmi noticed Minjae's work was slowly taking shape and she immediately realized what Minjae was trying to make. "Oh, lookie! Are you trying to make a castle, here, Minjae?" she asked as she crouched down, prompting Yechan to move around her and sat next to Minjae with eyes glimmering with interest. Minjae, not looking up from his creation, nodded quickly and confidently, "Yes, this is the princess's balcony," he pointed to the spot where he just finished. It was genuinely amazing to see such a young child be able to make an actual creation. Without thinking much, Sunmi pat Minjae's head and smiled gently, "I hope I can see the end result," as she wanted to show genuine interest and appreciation for what he was doing.

Time flew while she was on duty, spending time getting to know and interacting with the children. Soon enough, it was snack time for the children and Sunmi immediately took notice, not wanting the children to go hungry as they tend to use a lot of their energy. Sunmi clapped her hands to get the attention of the children. "Come on children, it's time for your snack!" she called out as she headed to the door to get the snack crates that would usually be placed by the door for the teachers to take. Knowing that the school usually gives out two crates, one for the snack and another for the milk, Jinsik, Sumin, and Hyunwoo jumped from their seats and rush to Sunmi's side to help her. Meanwhile, Junmin called his friends and got them ready in a line with the help of Yechan who just parrotted what Junmin said from the front of the line (as he was the tiniest and the most likely to create havoc in the back with Seeun or Junghoon). "Okay, Yechannie, can you help me give the milk away to your hyungs?" Sunmi asked the little boy as she helped Hyunwoo and Jinsik pull the heavier milk crate all the way to where the line started while Sumin pushed the lighter sandwich crate until it hit the milk crate.

Yechan was already holding onto his carton of milk when Sunmi spoke to him, asking him to help give out the milk to his friends and he immediately looked between his milk carton, the milk crate, and his friends. "Uh... Uh..." he hesitated for a bit, looking confused which didn't go unnoticed by Sunmi who crouched in front of him, "What is it, Yechannie? Are the cartons too heavy for you?" She asked, genuinely concerned about him. Yechan simply shook his head and placed his milk carton aside, "No, Yechannie can," he stated determinedly before taking three cartons in his arms and began walking to his friends and telling them to take one from his arms and doing it all over again until all of them got their milk. Sunmi was happy to see that everyone was getting along and even helping her out. It wasn't until Yechan finished handing out the milk cartons and the boys finished getting their sandwiches that she noticed there was one of each left. "Who hasn't gotten their snacks?" she asked, stopping the boys as they were about to sit down in the middle together to share their food.

Sunmi suddenly felt a tug on her shirt and saw that Hunter was the one seeking her attention. "Miss, Minjae hyung is still playing," he said as he pointed to the eldest, still busy with his legos which had had some features added since the last time Sunmi went to check on him. While it was impressive, to say the least, Sunmi also knew that the boys needed to have their snacks on schedule so they would be used to having a regulated eating schedule. It seemed like the boy was completely oblivious to what everyone was doing, however, simply minding his own business with absolutely no care in the world. Even when the children are bustling around, running near him with their food and drink, Minjae didn't even bat an eye which made Sunmi worry.

"Minjae-ah," Sunmi called out to him which luckily he noticed and shifted his big eyes from his work to Sunmi, "Do you think you can join us here for a minute?" she asked as sweetly as she can, not wanting to upset the boy. Luckily for her, Minjae simply blinked and looked between her, his work, and his friends before he noticed that it was indeed snack time. So he nodded and paused his construction to approach Sunmi with small yet quick steps. "'m sorry miss, I was making the castle's courtyard," he said with lips pursing slightly and eyes glancing at her from his bangs. Of course, Sunmi couldn't fault him, he was just so excited about creating something and she did say she wanted to see the end result so maybe hearing that, he became more eager to finish to show her that he was able to deliver. Sunmi simply smiled and shook her head at him, scooting closer to where he was standing to pat him on the head, "Don't worry about it, okay? I'm just glad you're enjoying yourself and you're joining us for snacks." Minjae visibly beamed upon hearing that, a wide grin plagued the boy's face before he nodded and skipped along to where his other friends were.

Seeing the children getting along and being able to follow instructions well made Sunmi's chest swell with pride. Looking at them in their big circle, Sunmi realized that they were so close to each other and they love and cared for each other. Maybe that was what made her duty so easy to handle.

That was until a cry broke the happy bubble and Sunmi heard one of the children yell for her attention. "Miss Sunmi, Jinsik hyung poked his nose with the straw!" Yujun called out before taking a munch of his sandwich as the other children watched Jinsik hold his nose while crying. "Seeun pushed my milk!" Jinsik yelled, still crying. "No, I didn't!" Seeun defended with quivering lips and within no time, he too began crying from the accusation which caused his brother Sumin to whip his head and rushed over to tower over Jinsik and ask if he made his brother cry. This was met with Jinsik, who was still in pain, pushing Sumin away which made him stumble and bumped into Hyunwoo, causing him to accidentally splash some of his milk onto Junghoon who froze (or seem like he froze). Chaos ensued and the once-calm room turned into a state of dystopia.

Perhaps Sunmi spoke too soon.

taglist :

@kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @thesolarplanetarysystem @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @jcngh0-hq @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17 @kpoplover718 @haatohwa @x-bluee @erinaimeexx @blackb3ll @mingiholic @angelicyeo @vampcharxter @meowmeowminnie @marvelous-llama @kawennote09 @hongjoong-lovebot @ming-ki @stopeatread @spooo00oky

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @kflixnet

[las-tortugas-ninja]

ok im gonna drop my character analysis on splinter/lou jitsu because im tired of people hating on him.

lets think about the circumstances he was in for moment. image you spent your life as a kickass action star only to get kidnapped by the person you loved and forced to fight in the battle nexus. you have to go through the grief of being betrayed by someone you shouldve been able to trust while now living in a chamber (which looks like it has just the poorest living conditions) and you have zero contact to the outside world, AND your ex who got you into this mess is using you for profit and throws you into fights you have no say in for peoples entertainment for who knows how long! i dont think its ever been stated how long he has been living like that!

now on top of all that imagine the moment you escape you get turned into a fucking rat. now i know its usually joked about but seriously being a rat does seem to really bother splinter and if you think about for like 5 seconds? yeah? why wouldnt it? he basically had his body changed in ways he did not consent to.

so yeah obviously after all that this guy is mentally ill as fuck and i bring all this up because of course it affects his parenting. imagine going through all that and now you have to be a dad to FOUR children (all of which are babies at this time) that you understand none of the biology of, and you have to raise them with ZERO outside support (seriously why doesnt anyone talk about that. what does he do if he needs someone to babysit them or one of them gets sick cause he aint a docter) all this combined makes me think yeah. ofc hes not gonna do a good fucking job.

and when the boys are teenagers and dont need the 24/7 supervision they did as babies. you see splinter spending a lot of his time watching tv melting into the recliner because * drum roll * he is depressed. i do not think he is lazy i think he is depressed and probably traumatized but he never had time to process that trauma because he had to be a dad.

because he spends so much time sulking in the living room his sons (specifically donnie) feel like he doesnt want to spend time with them and are reasonably upset with him.

so in the 22nd episode of the first season when splinter tricks donnie into entering the demolition derby. that was an eye opener for him to be better. he saw the absolute hurt in donnie’s eyes and tone of voice because he thought he wanted to spend time with him. that was the eye opener he needed to realize “oh shit. i really fucked up. i need to spend time with my sons. i need to be better for them.” and he apologizes to donnie because yeah, what he did wasnt okay.

and you can tell he changed for his sons because in “hidden city’s most wanted” you can tell all he wanted to do was spend time with mikey.

and the thing is there is nothing that can convince me his sons (and april to admitably) dont mean the fucking world to him. when draxum tells him that before him he had no purpose, that he was a husk of a man he says hes not lost anymore because he has his sons. his sons were the first thing he thought of when he needed a reason to why his life didnt fucking suck now.

this man went against the hamato clan teachings and almost got all of humanity killed for the sake of his sons. he loves his sons and he hasnt been great to them and he wants to change because he knows they deserve better. there is literally so much love emanating from this family.

a lot of people say that splinter is abusive/neglectful and im not denying that hes not perfect but jesus you can criticize his parenting without treating him like an irredeemable monster (because he is redeemable and he did change for the better)

also i know yall arent gonna wanna hear this but someones gotta say it cause its the truth: in general people will be harder on ethnic parents and treat them less like actual people capable of making mistakes. yes splinter is a rat but he is still ethnically japanese. he is a person of color and as someone whos been in fandom for awhile yeah people are suspiciously a lot more forgiving to white parents who make mistakes compared to when parents of color make them. i really do think its causing a bias.

[jasontoddiefor]

“Bruce can’t kill! He’s not a cop. He will just beat the shit out of you, arrest you, and hand you over to the cops who he doesn’t even trust. Also he believes in redemption, which is why he utilizes the Gotham prison system despite it never being focused on redemption or rehabilitation and also he continues to utilize Arkham despite it canonically making everyone worse!”

The issue isn’t just that Bruce doesnt kill the mass murderers of Gotham, it’s that his moral stance has no nuance. He doesn’t believe in self defense or defense of others. If bane was killing Damian and Damian killed bane to save himself, Bruce would blame Damian. There’s no room in his ideology, it’s just as extreme and skewed as other characters. AND! He can’t just let it be his own ideology. He has to force it on other people as well

I‘m assuming the second one is from the same anon! If not I’ll still answer in one since they work together

You‘re bringing up multiple interesting points here so I‘m gonna break those down briefly!

Batman‘s (Legal) Authority

He’s a vigilante. He has been enemy of the force for a time. The fact that he’s allowed to operate at all hinges p much only on the fact that he’s going after criminals and Gordon like him. And the moment he goes after criminals that are on the “legal” side of things, he’s public enemy #1. He’s never had any kind of binding legal authority.

Violence used in arrests

Batman is violent. Sometimes it’s on purpose, to show him losing control and going to far, sometimes it’s just “Haha Batman go punch” comic book narration style. But we also see panels of Batman talking people down, not using violence as a first, middle, last and only resort. And my original point about that was that “beaten up” is still better than “dead”.

Reliability of the system

I mean, yeah we know the cops and Arkham suck but what else is he supposed to do besides what he’s already doing, weeding out corrupt cops and funding Arkham? He could start his own private prison but we’ve seen in other comics how much that Does Not Work. I think ultimately, Batman sees himself as an emergency service trying to pick up what the system itself can’t do while trying to fix it himself. Meanwhile, people still have to go somewhere.

Humanity/Morality of Batman

Bruce Wayne is a dick. Very my way or the high way, arrogant, and a man of extremes. He cares about people, about love, but Christ he‘s not a good communicator. He‘s got flaws, his inability to see nuance at times is certainly one of them. But what struck me - especially in Batman: The Knight, which was why I added that panel and cannot stop recommending that comic - was that Bruce defines himself by acting out of love, the want to protect, and the realization that if his mission is to save human life, he cannot take it. No matter how much he might resent a person or think they’d deserve it, if he became the kind of person that would kill for his mission, he’d become someone unrecognizable.

Batman‘s ideology as a frame

This is going to sound very dismissive and I promise I do not mean it that way. Batman is a character that says “we don’t kill, period. If you can’t do that, don’t do the job”. Like, that sounds incredibly offensive, but those are the standards to which he holds himself. I’m the best, I can do it without resorting to taking a life, so if you do the same job I’m doing, you should be just as able. Bruce didn’t really make any of his Robins his side kick, they more or less did that themselves, kicking and screaming, whether. Batman wanted them to be Robin or not. If they wanted to, they could drop out (ofc they don’t actually can bc we’d be left without any comics) but they don’t. So we’re back to Batman saying, “if you wanna do the job, you have to be able to do it this way”. Thus one of the Robins taking a life in self defense doesn’t fly because they’re supposed to be better. Is that particularly rational? Well, no, not necessarily, but that’s what it boils down to. If they had to resort to taking a life to save themselves, they shouldn’t have been in the position I’m the first place, but somewhere away from the fight. He trained himself until he could fight without taking a life and thus everyone else who wants to do the same should learn it as well.

All of these are associated with the whole discussion surrounding Batman killing, and you raise interesting points regarding how Batman operates and the hypocrisies involved. The last two are difficult to discuss particularly because we’re still reading comic book heroes and not actual legal irl batvigilante. I think this is still a step sideways from my original point that Batman’s refusal to kill on principle is a valid stance the character should be allowed to keep, but all of this is interconnected.

[roseband]

My VVVIP experience with The Rose (very long):

I did the triple VIP package in Stockholm, Sweden with the boys <3

For the green room tour, they all started with a hug, which was very nice... they're all very short hahaha, but so handsome.

When I first got into the room, Dojoon commented that my top looked like some of the jackets they wear on stage, so I was happy that he noticed that lol (done on purpose!!)

The first thing they asked all of us is if we wanted anything to drink, I asked for a diet coke knowing that Hajoon is a diet coke drinker too, which turned into a conversation with them about how diet coke isn't really sold in that area of Europe cause of the chemicals in it, and how we should probably all.... stop. (I drink like 3-4 a day I have a problem)

They asked why I came all the way from NYC, I mentioned that I had a buttload of unused PTO (which they didn't know what that was, which, honestly... artist problems same reason I didn't use mine, I told them that I finally got a staff graphic artist job (forgot to mention the brand and i wanna kermit cause sammy and their photographer both own a lot of stuff from the brand i work for, and like a ton of other idols lol.... like Eric's whole family is a fan of one of the things I do some art on lol (I should seriously send him one of the toddler outfits I did a bunch on for his nephew lol)), vs the freelance I had been doing for 3 yrs before), asked if I had come to multiple cities or had gone on vacation only, and I told them I was on vacation in Sweden/Denmark.

They don't usually get to tourist when on tour, so mainly just plane/train, hotel, concert venue, maybe one part of the city, which is kinda sad ;_; also it must be so tiring, like Dojoon looked super tired and not the healthiest, so I hope he's okay, he kinda kept his distance from us during parts of the tour and also "brain farted" during Q&A......

But they asked how I got there, mentioned plane ofc, but I made a joke that u could probably take a cruise...?? Hajoon said UBER which made the others all laugh

I kinda froze a bit, it was a loooottt, so Dojoon made a joke that I could just stare at them even and it'd be okay...

I asked them if they were going to ever release the old songs (like photographer, omg, greed, can't let you go) that they used to play on their tours in 2017-19, when I mentioned omg/photographer I told Jae I like his little slap bass solos in them <3 <3 <3 (Jae def still has the most idol'y mannerisms cause he did the classic idol compliment, head turn, heart eyes and hands to chest lol)...

They're planning on releasing them in a special way for broses, and Sammy was thinking some sort of like, scavenger hunt type thing on rosarium. (pls give them to meeeeee <3)

I told them I like those (omg and photographer) the most cause I play a bit of bass guitar, even though it's not my main instrument... and that the VIP package made me want to get out my guitars again,, Sammy asked what it was and if it was guitar, which I was like CLARINET!!!! and Bass Clarinet which is like a super big clarinet that goes up to /here/ *stands and gestures height*.

Sammy and Hajoon both came to the conclusion that it's a "clarinet cello" and "like a cello to a violin" which YES!!!

So when they got the ukulele out to sign, going with the violin joke, Jaehyeong mimed it being like a violin hahaha, and as they went to sign it Sammy kvetched about how sharpies smell lol.

So I was still talking to them about the old tracks, and mentioned I was a predebut fan.... and /used to/ (at least my noggin worked there) run a tumblr page of them, and sammy mentioned he used to be on tumblr and would follow/look into fan accounts, so HELP ME, (now i'm certain they've seen that awful video ;~;) but there's no way that he hasn't seen my acct then and that's big bad energy for my brain now lol.

but for the 4 selfies they first asked who your bias was, and when I said jaehyeong soooo quickly they all made fun of me for how fast it was, but OFC!! bass baby.

Jae and I took the two selfies, plus he almost dropped my phone in the middle, so I have a third really derpy one that wasn't supposed to be taken, and then we had the two with ot4...

Pics:

I wanna know what witchcraft they use to look taller in pics though...

And also... my precious (I have to build my display for it now)

___

So after that we went for the stage tour....

I had initially hung by Jae while going on stage (and he helped me up cause their circle part of the stage was a big step up and i was wearing heels and am a klutz)

But I ended up hanging with Sammy and playing Skylar which <3 <3 <3

So two of the girls who were in my group played piano and were hanging with dojoon, and were both super good at piano btw!! <3

When I first put Skylar on I played a little bit of blackbird by the beatles and Dojoon sang alongggg, and then I played the beginning/chorus of back to me like the melody part (IDK I may slip in the audio that I recorded on my watch later, but not sure, I think I may wanna keep those private for me)

But Sammy asked if I wanted to keep playing (so I didn't get a chance on Juicy w/ Jae but that's okay, next year hopefully) and he showed me the chords to b2m and a little bit of the chords for alive.

It's really hard to play on stage, I'm not a guitar family main, and mostly play by tab/ear, so the delay you get from when you pluck/strum the instrument to when you hear it without the IEMs is really confusing.... so now I totally get why when they had that issue with their sound team with their IEMs they kept having such extreme issues cause it's like off by a half second from you playing and hearing it. (I can really only handle that delay on my reeds lol)

Also, rather than having a pedal board where they can change effects during tracks, they actually have them preprogrammed for each song, so they can change distortion type effects based on which song is in the setlist vs what effects they want at the moment. Which is different than when I went on their stage in 2018, cause they had a typical pedal board setup then.

Also when I took off Skylar, I asked Sammy what's with the heavy relic customs (cause he has two now) and he said that he just likes them..... and I sorta joked that in nerd instrument world that's not ok (even though I know someone who played at carnegie with duct tape on her fucking contrabass clarinet) and he said "well guitar can be a nerd instrument too" and like dude u do not know how weird woodwind players are... u do not get it but ily so much

___

Q&A/Soundcheck/Concert was... normal, waiting for fancams to upload now

___

We had one final group photo with the 5 VVVIPs where they also gave us the signed ukuleles and the posters they were holding backstage for us.

We got to hug them all again and we thanked them for the show.

We technically weren't allowed to give them gifts, but that was the only time we weren't watched as much, so one girl slipped them some black rose pins she ordered thru Dojoon, and I gave the keychains that I drew and had printed/manufactured through Sammy.

Sammy was impressed that I had all them and that the sticker on the back of Brittany is on the back, but when I mentioned I drew them he was like "wait you DREW these" so i'm super happy lol

...and then now i have world's worst post concert depression hahaha

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

[personal vent with some sprinkles of tr]

Today I feel emotionally exhausted. Completly drained. But not physically, with doesn't help because my body have too much energy for just laying down and be sad.

But I can't stop crying for everything and anything at the same time. And I know the sadness, the pain, the tears, are real. I know it bc I feel it. But at the same time I feel like nothing happened to me to be like this, like I don't have a 'real reason', that I'm not allowed to be this exhausted when from the outside it looks like I did nothing.

(And I know that's not true, I know I was burn out from the managements I had to do for having internet back, I know it scares me having an uknown man in my home, even if the internet technician was really nice and kind with my dog, what relaxed me bc if my traumatized dog doesn't feel danger and it someone treats him so good, that means everything is safe. And I know the day before I had a job interview and I had to go to the center what makes me be activated as fuck and my anxiety goes high being inside such a crowded small space like the metro. I know that all this things are a lot for me, I know it but if I don't write it is too easy to forget)

(And I also know that I'm finally talking about things in theraphy that broke me just too mention, I know there are real and valid reasons for be like this, I know I should be proud of myself. But I hate that the past can still hurt me, I hate how weak it makes me feel. Even if I know the fact that I'm finally open this box means I did a lot of progress with myself for getting here. But suddenly the old fears are screaming again and it seems like all the work I did for accepting my own vulnerability and not be terrified of feeling old pains just disappeared. And it sucks so much and only makes me be harder on myself)

Weirdly, if this was like my usual burnouts were I just don't have more spoons or an emotional flashback were I need time to feel safe it would be easy to manage. I would be more compasionate with myself, I'll know what to say to my intrusive thoughts.

But is not that. I'm emotionally exhausted to pretend to be strong, to be fine, to not be broke, to not be fighting with my mind constantly bc I wanna be better, I wanna get better, I can't slip into the same coping mechanisms again (even if it feels so easy to do it).

And I just feel like a kid, starting to cry again and again without "reasons". I just feel like a kid that doesn't want to be this weak, that wants to smile and to not make everyone worried bc it's fine, I'm fine, I'm strong, I'm resilient, of course I'll stand up again, ofc the past is not going to drown me, I'm strong and strong people...

Strong people cry.

Strong people are able to admit that they are scared and want to run away.

Strong people fail. And fail again.

Strong people have a lot of flaws and do a lot of mistakes.

Strong people allow themselves to feel the pain, the sadness, the fear.

They broke. Again. And again. Because they admit when something hurts them, they don't deny the pain, don't pretend to be unharmed.

And after that, they try again. Because they never give up. But they ask for help, the show weakness, they show their tears, they show they are vulnerable.

Because maybe being able to be vulnerable is what real strenght mean.

(and yes, I chose this image on purpose because the contrast with this empty Mikey and Takemichi is so huge, Mikey isolating himself on the top, never breaking until he can't take it anymore... I see myself so much in Mikey and it hurts, but it's also a good reminder of how much I need to remember the lessons that Michi showed us)

And I don't know if any of what I just said makes sense or if it's just me rambling around and remembering to myself what ment for Mikey being so strong and so unbreakable and how Takemitchy being openly vulnerable and showing his feelings to the whole world, saved him. Saved us.

Because Takemitchy saved me too and he does it again every time I'm about to not allow myself to cry and go to the old-repress-and-denial.

So yeah, thanks our crybaby hero. I needed you so much and even if I don't say talk about you enough, I love you a lot 💜

[ofrottenroses]

Stardust’s Divination Commissions

Status : OPEN

Slots currently open : 3

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

( Any / All forms of sharing this post is GREATLY appreciated )

HIIIIYA HELLO!!! I thought it’d be neat for me to start doing divination comms as a way of making some cash on the side to help me with saving money & also to help me out until I’m able to get a job of any sort !!!!

( I wanna be able to save up some extra cash not only could I have spending money on hand but also so I can move out in the nearby future ! )

( I’ve been low energy on art related stuff, this is more accessible for me at the moment so please ! If you’re interested ! Don’t hesitate to dm for inquiries !!! )

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

GUIDELINES & PRICES BELOW !

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

BASIC TOS

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

FOR LEGAL REASONS: My readings are ONLY for Entertainment purposes !

• Upfront payment is strictly REQUIRED . Cashapp only ( My local currency is in USD ! )

• ( I can only take Cashapp at this current moment in time ) + ( idk how well Kofi is working for me at the moment but please do try to stick with Cashapp, it’s the form of payment that’s most accessible for me at this current moment in time . )

• I am within my right to refuse to do any readings that makes me uncomfortable .

• PLEASE don’t hesitate to ramble to me about any / all info that you think I should know before I do the reading !!! The more information I have on hand ——— the better !!! Tell me everything that YOU think I should know / that you’re comfortable with telling me 🫶

• Take what resonates & leave what doesn’t !!! I am still learning & still strengthening my own intuitive abilities pretty much every day, or every single time I do a divination reading of any sort .

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

PRICES & OPTIONS

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

Pendulum reading - 5 dollar base price

( Depending on how complex the question is . Prices may vary . )

1 Question : 15 - 25

2 Questions : 25 - 35

3 Questions : 35 - 45

( fyi these listings above are for card related stuff . I only put the pendulum reading on top because of organization reasons . )

( If you choose any of the listings above vs the listing below you don’t have to worry ab paying extra unless you ask for clarifiers . Aka if you choose any of the question listings I’m gonna charge you based off of the question listings and not the card related listings ( & vice versa ofc ) please let me know if there is anything I need to clarify about the way I have this post worded / set up here )

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

1 card pull - 5 dollars

3 card spread - 15 dollars

5 card spread - 18 dollars

10 card spread - 25 dollars

12 card spread - 33 dollars

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

Anything that is not listed here like price per question / time / whatever can be discussed and adjusted / spoken about between myself & the client .

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ──

All in all, please don’t hesitate to ask any/all questions !!! RB this for visibility purposes & feel free to give me feedback / any or all of your thoughts on the reading that I have provided ! Thank you for your time !

I hope that you’ll enjoy your reading !

[01tsubomi]

hi!! if you dont mind me asking, how did you manage to end up teaching in japan?? ive been researching but info online is so extense and overwhelming and i never have good answers....

hello!! first of all i wanna say i understand the stress - i applied to j/et first and was going to work on backups like int/erac and private hiring if that didn't work out and i'm always thankful that i didn't have to. honestly now that i'm here it feels funny that i stressed out so much during the application process bc i always find myself thinking "damn they'll let anyone in" (often about myself lmao). it can be really odd and unexplainable who j/et does and doesn't take but japan needs a lot of ALTs to keep the system going so if you've got the enthusiasm for it there's definitely a place for you!!

i would definitely recommend trying for j/et and int/erac first before worrying about the other options!! since j/et has the biggest reputation ofc there's the double-edged sword of it feeling the most prestigious and hard to get into but again they do hire a ton of candidates every year, plus it has the highest guaranteed pay and takes care of so much for you pre-departure. idk where you're at in life/when you'd plan on applying but if you wanna start the job as soon as possible, int/erac has pretty much a rolling application and their main recruiting cycle is for spring departures (while j/et won't start recruiting again til october, for departure in summer 2025). int/erac gives you a little less pay and a little less initial help, but it's still very reputable. int/erac ALTs also have a few more freedoms once you're in japan bc i believe int/erac has your school hire you directly intead of employing you to your city's board of education. so for example my BoO doesn't let ALTs commute by car, but int/erac ALTs and private hires don't have that restriction. knock on wood, if neither of those work out, there are lots of sites like gaijinpot posting private hire opportunities. i don't know about the competitiveness of those and they do often require you to sort out visa application or housing on your own, but opportunity is always out there! seriously though i wouldn't worry about that at first. that's the backup plan ace up your sleeve

in terms of what you can do to raise your chances of getting hired, again, i think the enthusiasm is the key!! people say the j/et interview is a glorified vibe check bc they've been known to reject people who sometimes seem overqualified for the position (maybe for good reason - the amount of responsibility you get and teaching you get to do is suuuuper variable and dependent on your school, and probably about ~1/3 of my work days every year i have no classes and little relevant work to do, if any). i don't have a background or certification in teaching but i did a lot of tutoring in college and minored in japanese so i had a lot to say about my passion for language education. i know j/et really loves the angle of "what will you get out of the position, and what will you give back" - i can tell you're excited about the idea of teaching in japan so i'm sure you already have your answers!! if you have hobbies related to japan it's good to explain how being in japan would help you continue them. or you can always research what you could do with your non-japan related hobbies in japan! i love cooking and i started taking classes at a chain studio that does a mix of japanese and worldwide cooking. again i know the hit-or-miss element of it is scary but really they just want friendly open-minded people who can share their culture, have enthusiasm about education and exchange, don't mind the hours/job restrictions, and are down to pack their bags and live in japan. if you have any other questions please ask!! i know this is random but i've helped a couple of friends with their applications so if you do want some extra eyes on a statement of purpose my inbox is always open!! cheering for you!! 🎉🎉

[revenant-coining]

ooo what would you say is the farthest youve went ?? and how much energy would you say you have . but ooo thats so cool its like you have an infinite source because you can cause chaos wherever you go !!

fate sounds like a lovely being ^__^ do you ever wonder if youll be able to see her again ?? and it kinda sucks how most beings in that dimension only dislike you just because of who you are you cant control that :P im glad you at least had some friends though !! 

ooo i dont know anything about politics but was the system corrupt  ?? did things works out the way they were ?? how many jobs could one person have ?? what would happen if you didnt have a job how would you live in the world ??

ooo tendrils sound very useful !! were there any other uses for it ?? i wanna draw a character with tendrils now eee /pos

wait so there were mortals in your dimension ?? is there anything else about your dimension that you havent mentioned yet or isnt related to heaven or hell ?? but ooo minecraft is so much fun im glad they have it both here and over there !! i love looking at the builds personally , im planning on making a side blog just for my interests !!

hehe being a menace is fun though !! my headmates tell me im not one though im too sweet and... theyre right FKDJLSJ TwT what kinds of problems would you cause ?? any specific tricks or tomfoolery that stand out to you ?? thats good you didnt care what others thought of you i bet you are very swag then and even now i think youre swag wee :D 

DETROIT DJFLSKFJKSDL thats so random /pos

oh my god wait i actually really love learning about your dimension ?? like i love learning about it either way but JFKDJFLFJ that. the sin and virtue system is one of my FAVORITES idk if thats offensive or not lemme know though /gen but that is soo interesting !!

ooo thats good to hear !! im glad and i hope things are still doing well !! do you think youll ever be able to go back ?? if youre the god of chaos and they banished you i wonder how its like there now , do you think the balance has been thrown off because of the lack of chaos managing ?? but YES YES YES if and when you can please do draw it id love to see your interpretation of everything !! /nf

chewies check out list : mlp and hilda (when goop has the time ofc)

dude nesting is one of the autismal things ive learnt being human its just ... yes nest for me and my little creechure brain /pos did you teddy have a name ?? and do you nest right now in this realm ?? 

ooo why was magic and potion making big ?? what were the plants like ?? what do you think brought the beginning of how your economy works out ?? economy ive never thought id be so interested in before !!

ooo that dimensions sounds interesting its like theyre trying to prepare to not have any mystical beings but it is very interesting how they were able to push you out i wonder how :O do you give dimensions names ?? do the other gods have the power to open portals ??

we experience dpdr as a symptom of being a system so we know what thats like though we never really put a name to it i like how you have a zombie ai and ghost coping link though !!

ramble anon

the only way to measure how far I've gone is how long it takes me to get my energy back (assuming I'm getting a constant stream of chaos energy). but time works differently in different dimensions. the longest i was in a different dimension is 2 years i think? but when i got back to my dimension only a month had past in hell and heaven (a week had past in my dimension's mortal plane, hell/heaven and the mortal plane had different time flow, a month in hell was a week in the mortal plane)

Fate was very lovely :]

I kinda understand why they didn't like me, cause i didn't need to cause problems on purpose, but i did anyway. and i might not have memories of most of my friends but i have positive emotions associated with them :]

despite running in politics i don't think i knew anything about them, I'm pretty sure my friend was doing most of the thinking and i was just along for the ride. i don't recall any big corrupt controversy so i don't if anything happened /gen. most people if they had a job dedicated their lives to it, but nothing was stopping them from having multiple or changing careers. money wasn't nearly as important as it is in the mortal realm (or this universe for that matter). you could trade for goods or do random chores/quests to get stuff.

i mainly used my tendrils to grab stuff i couldn't reach and carry heavy things, since no weight seemed too much for them. also they were nice for like, grounding exercises. i could wrap one around my leg or torso and be chilling

yeah there were mortals. in my universe earth was real and i'd visit sometimes (mainly to learn about music) humans were a thing along with a bunch of humanoid species (like siren/mermaids, hybrids, etc.) there were portals to and from earth, heaven, and hell so it was common for heaven and hell beings to be on earth.

another thing i haven't mentioned is the Red Dimension (a sub-dimension with my "parent" dimension, which is quite literally a dimension where everything inside wants to kill you. the entire dimension and everything in is was some shade of red. it looks kinda cool but is not a fun place to be.

and Fate lived in her own dimension, basically, an infinite space for archiving what has and what will happen, lots and lots of filling cabinets filled with records of everything. inside said dimension is the. waiting line i guess for getting souls into an afterlife if they believed in one.

minecraft builds are very cool, my (this dimension) older brother is real big on building things. and i highly recommend a side blog for your interest :]

when it comes to being a menace and getting chaos energy, chaos, destruction, and absurdity work well on getting said energy. i avoid causing destruction, but sometimes Fate would tell me that something (like a natural disaster) is going to happen so i could be ready for the influx of energy (excess energy makes me hyper). my favorite way to be chaotic was biting people, it works very well on getting energy and is just very fun to do. throwing myself around with my tendrils worked as well. if i could find something to do that would shock people in a absurdity kinda way i'd end up doing it.

the sin and virtue system IS really cool, and don't worry it's not offensive to say that /gen. I'm glad you like learning about my dimension! I really enjoy talking about it :]

I have no clue if I'll be able to go home while in this body since I don't have access to any of my magic, so I guess I'm waiting to see if some powerful being from this dimension or my own gets me home? I don't know how I ended up in this body in the first place /gen. I haven't even thought about how the balance is back home, I hope the other powerful beings have figured out at least a temporary solution.

I'm on my way home right now so when I answer you're next ask I'll have the drawings done and show you :]

I love nesting SO much. comfy objects is what it's all about. I don't recall the name of my teddy bear, and I nest in this dimension as well (not being able to purr lowkey sucks)

magic is very big in my dimension, even mortals use it. so it was used for a lot of stuff, and he'll had lots of resources for magic and potions. magic and potions are important cause of the fact that lots of creatures that are deadlier then the one's in this dimension exist, so mortals have to be able to protect themselves. The plants looked pretty funky /pos and I remember how a few of them look. (I'll show you art of the plants in my answer to your next ask!)

I think the economy started before I was made, which means it's REALLY old, I've been around for a while but it's been around longer.

I've named a couple dimensions (like afterlife but it's Detroit) but they're more like nicknames. Even the Red Dimension has a official name (which I think is just a bunch of numbers and letters?) but we call the Red Dimension cause it's. very red in there.

most powerful beings can open portals or teleport, it's the main way of transportation (especially between earth, heaven, and hell so people don't have to walk to the natural portals.)

my copinglinks are very close to my heart <3 they help a lot with making dpdr less distressing /gen

[bigmack2go]

Ok so i found something from a while ago and never posted it so here u go ig

Ok first coment: „hey, i just noticed qll the little deatails. You’re really in character, good job!“

(Might not have been abozt that but like i feel like it was)

LMFAO SOMEONE PASSING BY JUST YELLED AT ME ACROSS THE ROOM„wrong foot!“ I CANT 😭💀

Ok so apparently a lot of people know what foot kaz hinks on???

Lmao this one came from my friend who went to the con w me??? „You wanna be completely in character? Hink! Trust me thats the deatails“ i just sort of looked at him fir a minute and then he went „cuz rn ur just walking like u alsways do“ and idk what do respon😭😭😭

Cleared tho whole thing up. Apparently the motherfucker didn’t knew i hinked??? Anyway so i think he’s just an idiot bc i cant believe what he said later. Half an hour later he said „you’re hinking with the wrong foot“ LIKE MF I CANT CHANGE ME DAMAGED FOOT IM SORRY

Ok so i won a price omfg

Im honestly embarrassed by how fucking dumb and oblivious my friends are cuz i think at least seven strangers noticed my limb today and pointed it out and at least as many friends of mine that know me for a very long time haven’t even known about it? I mean i dont rly bring it uo but you have eyes.

Just won another price for being in character. Like the guy SAID IT OUT LOUD.

Why do so many people know which foot Kaz Brekker the Bastard Of The Barrel™️ hinks on?

Someone asked if i choose the character with the limb on purpose 💀💀 (worst part is: yes. Yes i fucking did😭😭💀)

Ok this one was kind of cute. I dont think they knew the character but they noticed i was hinking and asked if i was okay🥹 my heart melted

Its really weird how people are super supportive about kaz and tell me they really like that i represent disabled people by cosplaying him but at the same time just assume that my limb is fake??

Lmfao someone just said im a furry for hinking😭😭

I didnt think that ACTUALLY so many people would notice that im not hinking on my left.

I made this more as a joke tbh. I expected them to notice the limb but the side guys?? Seriously?? I was joking!!!

So turns out that i the only reason i permanently hurt my foot when i was eight, was so i‘d get attention (which i absolutely love! I love love love being the centre of attention for something that isn’t even represening me as a person! And the pitying? *cheffskiss*🤌🏼) and could say im representing kaz? Who I absolutely totally knew about when i was EIGHT? I mean ofc like duhhh. What did u think?

Ok so ive never had so many people even notice my limb on one day and now they’re all kinds of people noticing?? some are insulting my about it?? Why tf are you insulting for a limb? Like thats a genuine question: why?

Conclusion: even tho there were less people at that convention than living im my town, there were still 5 times more that ever noticed mine in years of having it there at one day

[psychelis-new]

pick a pile: "What do you need to leave behind"

take a breathe and choose the photo/number that calls you the most to read about what are you supposed to leave in the past in order to give birth to a new cycle of your life.

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. Also, you're in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

1 - 2 - 3

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 1

Anxiety (social anxiety/ruminating in particular) and attachments issues. Especially waiting for an answer/feedback and like... keep checking on others to see if you can grasp it. Or keep checking your phone waiting for a message reply. And immediatley read it when it arrives. You may be quite impulsive at times, start acting out of nowhere, probably overworking even when you get a rush of adrenaline going. Maybe you do this to distract your mind when doubts arise.

I'm smelling almonds now, it may mean you don't do this on purpose, your intentions are good ofc. It's just something that is stored in you (probably from a childhood/past life trauma related to emotions/lack of feedback); you may need to deal with this cause it can get difficult to live with such expectations and anxiety towards others (and how they may react and all that noise inside of your head). Focus on you the most. On doing your best. And balance your energy (I think the masculine is a bit too strong: nurture yourself). This Mercury retrogade may be talking to you in a particular way, enhancing this problem with communication and relationships/insecurities.

Yup, your feminine energy is a bit blocked now. You might be stressing a lot over emotional responses from others. But you need to learn to let go a bit, to trust, and to believe that if someone is not answering you right away, it means they may be busy not that they hate you or you have said something terrible or dumb and they don't want to have nothing to do with you anymore. Keep working on yourself, so to be able to attract what you really desire, and balance yourself better. And stop self doubting, you're worthy, keep that in your mind.

Learn to be strong and to realize your own power. Be present in yourself fully: don't let your mid wonder and take over, it is often wrong and seeing stuff as worse than itactually is. Be objective and pay attention to facts when things get overwhelming (even if it's hard). And start giving to yourself, and especially your inner child: it may have wounds you really need to take care of.

Stop hurting yourself with the overthinking, it's not worth the pain: you're the only one making yourself suffering, while you're supposed to make yourself happy.

songs: give me love | ed sheeran; burst into flames | cavale; anxiety | black eyed peas

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 2

You may need to let go of fear. There's probably some thoughts that are blocking you or triggering you very deeply. My heart kinda jumped out of my chest and I almost want to tear up. What is going on pile 2?

Could be related to love for some tbh, maybe there's a new love that seems too good to be true or you have never experienced love before and it's kinda scary or your'e unsure of how it'll turn out (it may also trigger you somehow).

Do you fear trying? Are you scared of someone's reaction or something's outcome (maybe a new career/self employed job you wanna try)? Of being different?

Don't worry it's all in your head. You're doing great and you are also healing yourself successfully (you still may need to work on a few things though, seen what I got. Maybe some of you may even need to start their healing journey but you know you you need to do it and you wanna try). You know it takes time and patience, you're not rushing/you won't. You're finding out so many things about yourself, how strong you are, so why are you letting fear/overthinking block you? I know from the outside it all looks clear and obvious, but when it's time to act from the inside things look worse and harder... but try. You really only need to try, to take a leap of faith and make your own reality (I almost wrote destiny, so yeah, that's a massive confirmation). Focus on the happiness, the good, your bravery, how things can (and will) go well for you, don't do what we usually do, when we focus on that small thing that is going wrong while forgetting about all the good around us literally yelling at us. Let things change, welcome that change and don't let your worries stop you. Keep giving love to yourself: you know the choice is only yours. You can decide if to stay in the same mold, or to jump where you need and feel you belong. It's a matter of taking control of your mind and its twirling, but you can do it. It won't be easy, but to have a different result, to go to a different place, you need to change what you do and how you think. And everythign here says you can. You totally can. You only need to believe and try. Things are gonna go great for you. Focus on the now, take that little step that you are missing and that separates you from success.

songs: yours to keep | jordan mackampa; with me | sum 41; bitter sweet symphony | the verve

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 3

You probably need to change your environment at least for a little. I keep hearing "emotional dept", maybe there are situations that are getting kinda tough right now or overwhelming. You need to put a few miles (or kms at least) between you and what is hurting you (especially who is hurting you): you deserve some peace, a time out from all that noise inside. You need to do something nice for yourself, to distract yourself especially if you're healing (doing things for us, that relax us, that make us feel good, that we enjoy like baking, painting, taking a walk in nature, meditating... you name it, it's a crucial part of healing: you don't have to work 24/7 on a real deep healing, it'll only have the opposite outcome for you. You need breaks. Even more if it's related to karmic family relationships). Do something you enjoy.

You may feel like you need to control yourself inside pretty often, to be in charge, to take care of others and be their anchor, but the truth is you need to change your point of you. You need to be in charge (and you are) of your own happiness and yourself. Only that. Trust your Guides and inner self, and start a different journey all for yourself. You may be overthinking on things that are not very important, that are just taking away your inner peace and stressing you out (maybe what others may think? Not your problem, at the end of the day).

You have been giving away a lot of you (time and effort), it's time for you to start taking back and learn how to take care of your needs, nurture yourself the way you need. Body and soul (use lotions, creams, take warm bath, go running, meditate, do yoga, work on your chakras... act on both your sides). Learn how to treat yourself if you wanna teach others how to truly show care for you too.

And keep manifesting, keep working on your dreams: no matter the noise around, you can get anywhere you want, especially if you need to really go away. You can.

Let go of this self inflicted pain, stop always being there for others: use your life experience to shine and go away from the environments that aren't for you anymore. Take this leap of faith, be more aware of all the good can be hidden for you in another place and follow your guts. A small change of view can give you a lot (in particular if you are a creative person: but anyway, changing air can be very inspiring and help you take a break from the wrong energies around you). And remember if you're waiting for the right time, it may never arrive. Start moving the focus on you and what you want now. Be your "one". Mercury retrogade is the best moment (as for travel, be a little more careful, plan accurately. Or start planning now and leave later on. But I think your Guides will take good care of you, just be sure to double check everything).

songs: be the one | dua lipa; 神樹 | huan chen yu; control | metro station