#oh it's a budgie by the way.

[crescentmp3]

oh by the way. there's a bird in my house

[bluebudgie]

Never before have i ever been this excited by the prospect of jumping down a cliff and potentially not immediately knowing how to get back up

[bougiebutchbitch]

NGL I do find it funny that the side of the fandom yelling “if you’re uncomfortable with the way Con showed up to a livestream with his whole bulge on prominent display you’re homophobic” is the same side of the fandom that was harboring multiple sexual predators lol throwback to the Canyon Kink Camp!! Anyway shoutout to the canyon for knowing how to be normal about people’s boundaries <3

I notice you sending this message to multiple people. On anon. Smells like teen cowardice.

So, first off -

You are lying through your teeth.

Victims of two sexual predators came forwards... and those sexual predators were immediately thrown out of the canyon. They were blocked/black-listed everywhere and deactivated! Explain to me how that is 'harbouring'?

Some weirdo also started harassing the victims because they were a friend of the perpetrators. They were...... also....... mass blocked and lost all their popularity, as far as I'm aware (I don't actually know that person, and am not on Twitter, etc.)???

Sexual predators will show up literally anywhere in society - including in your precious fandom spaces. Pretending that your half of the fandom is 'pure' and 'perfect' is, in fact, far more dangerous than acknowledging that there were predators, and dealing with them.

Especially when the antis were the ones crowing that people like me, who are abuse and rape survivors IRL, had 'no idea what abuse/rape looks like', and still are making claims like that in the tags - as well as sending asks accusing us of lying about our trauma.

All because we like a fictional character who you hate.

As for Con showing up in his underwear...

Literally nothing was showing.

You saw the SHAPE of a bulge. It was no more revealing than Tom Hiddleston's Loki outfit, and there have been uncensored gifs of that flying around willy-nilly (pun intended) for years without anyone being Shocked and Disgusted about it.

If you're not bothered by men being in underwear when you go to the beach and see guys rocking a budgie smuggler, but you're throwing a massive stink about a queer man being in his underwear on a ticketed show that was always marked as Explicit, and using it as an excuse to call him a sexual predator, I honestly don't know what to say to you.

Boundaries are real and important.

But if you went to an explicit stream and saw something mildly suggestive there, and proceed to accuse a queer man of being a sexual predator... You are the problem.

And yes, you are a homophobe.

Even if you are queer yourself, you are contributing to the dangerous rising current of accusing queer people of being 'degenerate' and 'perverse' for merely existing, because - oh, think of the children.

And that's without mentioning that Con is a vocal supporter of trans kids in the UK. We all know how queer people who dare to support trans people are unjustly painted as predators. It's happening on Tumblr, with the mass reporting and banning of trans men and women for 'inappropriate content' that is no more explicit than what cishet people have on their blogs. It's happening all over the world.

Hell, all profits from Con's livestream went to Mermaids (UK charity for trans folx) and true colours united (homeless lgbt youth charity).

Take a good long look at your argument. Take a good long look at the current political climate for queer people. Ask yourself who your insistence that Con is sexually inappropriate for... wearing underwear, is really helping.

If you feel this unsafe around even the vaguest suggestion of genitalia, the onus is on you to avoid any streams where you might encounter it. You're no different than people who read Explicit-marked work on AO3 and leave hatemail for the authors because you encountered smut.

[parakeet]

Was wearing my budgie bag today and this little old woman complimented it and oh, it was such a sweet little moment, she started telling me about how she had budgies as a child, their names were billy and Hank and they used to talk and play football with little toy balls with their beaks, and it was just so heartwarming. I love the way animals touch our lives. It was so nice to hear about some long gone but certainly not forgotten beloved little friends. 😭

[cup1dt3a]

Hello, I saw that you were writing for Welcome home and was wondering (If you took requests for it) if you could possibly do a possessive/obsessive (if you want to do Yonder you can!) Wally Darling x reader where the reader has a bird, when weird things start to turn up and objects start to disappear- the comfort of their home grows sour- they end up questioning themselves on what is happening and that they may have a squatter or even a stalker/ intruder who enters the home when the are either away, at work or asleep till the bird starts screeching out "Darling" in the middle of the night and would freak the hell out when ever the reader has Wally or he gets anywhere close to the doll/ puppet?

(Browny points if Reader sees Wally as a comfort object/stuffy)

I thought it would be a cool lill thingy.

If not that is A OK! I only wish for you to be comfortable!

I LOVE THIE IDEA And birds <33 Tysm for the request! And don’t worry I am comfortable with this request tysm for asking either way. Also the bird is a parakeet but I just like the word budgie more! It sounds just sooo cute and fun to say! Hope you and everyone are having an amazing day/night

Warning ⚠️ angst, bad home life, panic attack description

( I might have gone a little overboard with this one so there are some warnings. I’m sorry but the angst gods told me to make ppl cry a river and I had to please them)

“ Aren’t you just sweet?” You cooed out to your little budgie Bean as they nuzzled your face.

“Sweet bird! Sweet bird!” She squawked in agreement.

She was a little green budgie you had recently gotten from the pet store after months of saving. Bean was your dream pet. As a child you would always beg your parents for a budgie and constantly tell them everything you knew about them. But finally after moving out you had finally gotten your dream bird. And they were most definitely worth the wait from how sweet they were. Just a little cuddle bug and sometimes a mischievous little thing. For they had made it a habit of stealing some of your things to make a nest. It was cute but you needed your things back for your work.

After a month of having bean things started to feel odd. Not odd as in pigs flying but as if you were being watched. You knew it wasn’t bean because you would leave her beside one of your windows to have some sunlight in your kitchen. You would move her little “ house” to your room during the day. But at night you would move it to the kitchen due to her squawking a lot. At first it confused you why she would constantly squawk at night, but you thought it was maybe because of some of your room decor scaring her. Once you moved her out of your room to the kitchen she had finally stopped. Poor baby scared of something in your room. You just wished you knew what it was.

You cuddled your Wally plush sighing as you stretched to go see what Bean was screeching about. Your budgie had been constantly almost every night yelling for you. It was concerning. At first you brushed it off as then just having separation anxiety but you were wrong. You needed sleep for work but your small bean came before that. As you went to the kitchen you hurriedly gently got them out of their cadge to comfort them. This wasn’t good. It’s a well known fact that birds could be scared to death. You might have to sadly get rid of Bean if this kept happening. You loved her but you didn’t want her to die because you couldn’t bear to part with her. You gently scratched the top of their head to soothe them.

You had brought them back in your room where Wally sat on top of your bed still. As soon as you got in there with Bean they started to freak out squawking “ Darling! Darling!”

Oh shit! They were scared of Wally. You placed them into their cadge before gently putting Wally away under your bed. They soon stopped calming down finally.

“ Poor baby. I’m sorry I didn’t notice.” You said to the bird.

You felt horrible for not noticing Beans distress over the puppet. How could you not have noticed for so long? Poor Bean.But you still wondered why they would freak out even when in the kitchen. Must be cats or something you thought as you cradled the tiny bird. Seeing them finally ok. Your tired brain had time to wonder what was bothering them in the kitchen later since it was late and you had a shift at 5 in the morning you needed the sleep. Yawning as you pet their fluffy green feathers for the last time before putting them to bed. You went to your own plopping face first onto the bed before snoring the night away. While a certain pair of eyes glared at the finally peaceful bird.

This isn’t going to well at all

“Yeah you know that Wally plush I have? Yeah turns out Bean was just very scared of it.” You told one of your friends as you gave in another order of food to the back.

“ I wouldn’t blame them! That thing is creepy and how long have you had it for again…oh yeah 12 years!” They announced while you rolled your eyes before walking off to your next table.

It’s only been 12 years plus Wally is in very good condition because you may or may not have studied a lot about how to keep plushes in good shape for years. But that doesn’t matter! Wally was just a toy you always had. It felt as if he was always there for you. Listening to your frustrations, rants, bottled up feelings, and even helped you go through the worst year of your life.

Wally was given to you when a friend of yours had noticed you’ve been on the brink of harming yourself for a while. Your home situation wasn’t that good. And they had become worried, so on they gave you Wally. And you just felt a bit of a connection with the doll. It could maybe be that his eyes always looked like they were at attention every time you needed just somebody and Wally turned into your somebody. Sure plushies didn’t work for everyone but Wally did for you so whatever.

As you brought another ticket to the kitchen you had noticed a familiar color of blue poking out of your bag. You rushed to it flipping the top over to see Wally still staring at you with his smile and wide eyes at full attention as always.

“ How did-“ you muttered before being caught off by your boss yelling “_____ keep it moving!”

You hurriedly nodded as put the plus as gently as you fastly could back into your bag. This was the second time you accidentally brought him to work with you. It might have been from habit of always carrying him around but you don’t know you your anxious brain would bring him. You were now scared of being him anywhere except around the comfort of your home. For the fear of losing him, getting him dirty, one of his stitches coming loose, or even one of the cute buttons on his blouse popping off.

You must have just been so rushed today from your lack of sleep and accidentally put him in your bag as you were moving it out from under your bed.

You failed to once again notice the hateful glare threatening your boss as they still had their little yellow head poked out the bag.

Finally after finishing your shift you were called to your bosses office. You dreaded being fired is he going to fire you? Is he sick of you bringing your plush to work by accident. You don’t get that distracted by Wally right? Right?

“ Do you know why I called you here?” She asked while her arms were crossed.

“ No ma’am…am I going to get fired?” You hesitantly asked.

“No _____ but. You need to stop bringing that thing to work! It’s been a distraction to you everytime! This is the second time I’ve had to give you a warning the next time I have to I’ll be letting you go. Do you understand?” She sneered clearly once again upset with your performance at work.

“Yes…Yes ma’am I promise next time to be sure they’re not in my bag before leaving for work.” You promised.

“Thank you _____. But don’t forget that I will fire you if you also continue to daze off during your shifts too.” She remarked as you nodded before turning your back to get out of there.

All the while this time the doll sent a silent threat to your boss. Mortifying her.

Finally home you started to feel as if something was off about it. As you went to see where Bean was they were fast asleep behind their little toy. Yu stared in awe at how cute they were before silently putting some food I. Their cadge when they wake up. Their water was still full and you cleaned it yesterday so they’ll be fine.

You headed off to your room know Bean will alert you when they awake. As you got to your room to try and find some of your pens you noticed they weren’t there anymore. It was odd because you hadn’t had a break to use them in a while so how are they suddenly gone? You then looked for your headphones nowhere to be seen. Even looking for just a hair brush no where to be seen. That’s odd very odd. You used your headphones and hairbrush this morning. How could they not be there. This was creepy. You then looked for one of your oversized shirts once again no where to be seen. All of them except your blue and rainbow one could be seen. You then headed to your bathroom. Toothbrush, perfume, and even retainers gone. What the fuck. What the actual fuck this doesn’t just happen no. Bean couldn’t have done this because they were in their bird house all day. And you knew how to unlock it so… Is there someone in your apartment?

No there can’t be the window is shut, every door still shut, your front door locked, and everything was still as neat as you left it. Do you have some kind of creepy stalker in your house? No no! This can’t be happening you might have just misplaced them? Right you are just forgetful! No one can be in here you live alone with Bean. What if that’s what’s been causing her to squeak out every night. Were they trying to alert you? No, if someone was in here they would have still be screaming out.

You felt too hesitant to go to bed. The lingering question if some stranger being in your house scare you to the bone. You cuddled your Wally plush close to you. Scared. Being full of all the dreadful thing someone could do while you slept. Or even the horrific idea of what they could do to you. Were you just paranoid? Is everything off and you misplaced them all. You didn’t know you were just scared. Tomorrow was your off day and you for once wished it wasn’t just not wanting to be in here right now but at the moment you had no where else to go. You couldn’t sell your house and clean it out because that would take months of work you didn’t have time for. You just wanted to sleep for one night with bean not disturbing you. Why must the world be so cruel with its ridiculous powerful anxiety prone ways of giving you a panic attack? Why does everything go wrong for you? You just wanted to live a good rest of whatever life you had once free from the old place you called home not worried about some stalker.

You held your breath trying to hear if anyone was there. Even as your eye’s watered you still tried to keep it in. But eventually after 5 hours of keeping your eyes open they eventually closed drained from work and too many all nighters.

You woke up with Wally’s head now onto oof yours in almost a hugging position. And a few loud squawks coming from the kitchen. It was 2 pm now. Geez you slept for that long. You hesitantly got up looking around to see anything misplaced. Thankfully nothing was gone or placed somewhere else. You went to the kitchen the atmosphere of your home still as sour as it was when you came in you had seen Bean happily fluttering around wanting you to hug him. Even going as far as to demand them.

“ Hug and Kiss! Pretty bird! Hug and kiss pretty bird!” They chanted making you chuckle.

This is what you needed just this little distraction. Maybe you were just paranoid now seeing your two shirts on the laundry machine. As you turned around with Bean placed o toy our finger to get some food your hopes once again came crashing down. After they seemed to look up a heart gaped apple now laid on your counter white a yellow note beside the now sticky knife.

“ A sweet for my sweet <3”

No no no no no! No! This isn’t happening! No this wasn’t! Why does everything just go wrong for you? You needed to get out of here now. As you hurriedly for yours and beans things you tried to open the door only for it to not budge. How could it lock from the outside the only way to unlock it was in here. You set Bean aside as they tilted their head in confusion. You then started to aggressively try to pry the door open. Even going as far as to beat on it. After an hour of doing this till your throat was sore you stopped.

You were now trapped with some sociopath. You started to hyperventilate sinking down to the floor crying. You didn’t know what to do! Your phone is gone. Because as you hurriedly got everything you noticed it wasn’t on your nightstand.

You felt helpless and trapped. Bean was event running low on food. You don’t want to be here. You just wanted some peace. You’re scared and overly anxious. You’re pretty sure you might have a panic strake from the rapid beating of your heart, the ache in your chest making it too tight to breathe and the endless flow of tears. As you shake out Bean worriedly plops on top of your head while you shaking figure tries to calm down.

“ Pretty bird! Wanna kiss? Mwah!” They squawked placing a gentle constant mwah with every kissing peck of theirs.

“ Oh pretty birds so sweet.” You cooed slightly calming down as the ache in your chest still left you gasping for air.

Just as you were starting to calm down a loud potter patter started to be heard across the floor.

“ Darling! Darling!” They panicked.

You went pale now knowing who your captor was as the familiar wide eyes and wide smile peered down onto you.

Tysm for reading! Hope you enjoyed! I’m almost done with some of my requests so hope you enjoyed this one. And whoever requested this hope it lived up to your standards! Anyways hope you all have a good day or it gets better!

Sincerely -Cup1dT3a 💌

[sharkneto]

Hey, sorry if this is a bit of a personal question - and feel free to ignore it if it is - but how did you know you wanted to start hrt? I am someone who IDs as transmasc and knows in an ideal world, I would've loved to have been born a guy. But the idea of going on hormones is terrifying because I can't figure out if I really want it... I worry about regretting it, or it making me 'unappealing' physically, or my friends judging me for it. Did you ever struggle with similar worries?

I think every person thinking about and starting HRT goes through this. A rite of passage, if you will, and also not a bad thing to do. HRT is a big step, some of the changes (especially on T) are irreversible. It's good to think through if it's a choice that's right for you or not.

That said, it's also Just A Thing You Can Do. I first started really questioning my gender at the end of 2020 (thank you, Elliot Page, for coming out and making me go "oh shit, you can do that?"). I got a therapist to talk about gender... Mid 2022? And started hormones spring 2023, top surgery a year later.

Before getting the therapist, I spent over a year Just Thinking About It. And a lot of the thoughts were around the changes on T and if I'd like them or not or if I'd regret them. If I'd be ugly, after being conventionally attractive as a woman.

It hits a point, though, where eventually you have to pull the plug one way or another. I spent a lot of time thinking about how my body would change on T. A Lot. With longing. I caught myself putting things off Until I Knew For Sure and because I didn't want to do it while being perceived as a woman. I was sitting, treading water for a hypothetical Later that I could start moving towards at any time. I was scared for the Teenage Round 2 phase, and didn't want to spend months being "ugly and awkward", but then the months passed anyway and I was still in the same spot.

HRT isn't an all-or-nothing thing, you can ease into it on a low dose. My doctor started me on a low dose and we ramped up over months. Some T changes can start pretty quickly (voice dropping, bottom growth - this isn't true for everyone, but was true for me). If these changes excite you, make you feel good - great! Keep going! If they scare you, feel wrong - stop. Assess. Figure out what about it isn't right (a gender therapist for all of this process is a Huge Help). In early days if you stop T, the changes can revert, for the most part. But you can always stop at any time.

The bigger thing I actively worked to wrap my head around before starting HRT is - Who Cares If You're Wrong? What's right for you now might not be right for you later. The idea of detransitioning was scary to me, society has such a weird spotlight on it, the Right uses people who have detransitioned as props against transition. But it shouldn't matter. At the end of the day, if I do change my mind, I'll know myself better, and I don't think it's wrong to chase and find comfort in your own body.

A year+ on T, I've mostly made it through the ugly duck phase, I think. I was lucky, I didn't get bad acne or get too oily or anything (after having horrible acne in my first puberty). Most of what I dealt with was the chronic baby face, where I was getting read as male but a teenager - I'm almost 30 and a woman wanted to card me over a free T-shirt at a baseball game because it had beer logos on it. After some middle months of changes and going "oh my god what am I doing" and not feeling confident in how this was all going to turn out, I think of myself as relatively attractive and I think I'm just going to get more vain as my beard comes in. Some of that is physical, sure, but I think a significant amount of that is me feeling more confident in myself and liking the body I'm in more. I was never a selfie or picture person, now I am. I joke I'm like a budgie, always looking at myself if there's a reflective surface nearby. I'm more excited to exercise, I'm interested in lifting weights for the first time, I'm curious what my body on T can do and become. Keep your eyes on the pieces that are going well, the changes exciting you, and let the rest catch up.

My social circle helped a lot. I'm very lucky and blessed to have great friends and family, all of whom are supportive. If you don't have friends who are supportive of you, that are judging you for exploring yourself rather than lifting you up for it, it's a sign to expand the social circle and find ones that are. Family is harder, but that's a thing you have to navigate for yourself and find your own boundaries for.

So, there's no ~one moment~ where you're 100% certain that medical transition is right for you. It's a huge unknown and you're changing the body you've had your entire life. At some point, though, you just have to jump and see how it lands. Part of being alive is making mistakes and doing things you might regret.

That said, the regret rate for trans people is something like 3%. The regret rate for knee surgery is something like 20%. Trust yourself.

[magicalgirlmascot]

Okay, in the KNPS AU, we know the Mata and the Metru's stances on pets... how about the Inika/Mahri and the various other Toa? (Helryx, we know your favorite animal is the african grey you own who is just as intimidating as you.)

Bfkshdis okay hang on

Jaller: dog and cat person equally. Has a pet golden retriever and she is the sweetest dog on the planet. Wishes his parents would let him get a crab like Takua's.

Hahli: has farm dogs and barn cats and likes them both fine enough but is a horse girl in her heart of hearts. Is trying so hard to keep that under wraps.

Kongu: Bird Boy. Has a pet budgie. Genuinely debating whether it's named Ka or to go with @avita-anarchy 's suggestion and give him a Kia with a missing i in the logo.

Hewkii: gets emotional about tiny dogs. He and Macku have made many jokes about adopting dogs instead of having kids when they're older. Neither of them is actually joking.

Nuparu: allergic to animal dander. Loves lizards and wants one so bad.

Matoro: walking animal encyclopedia. Loves birds, especially chickens. Firm believer in keeping your fucking cat indoors.

Takua: crab :) became somewhat less enamored by regular pets after they had to clean up after other people's pets on the regular.

Krahka: hates cats. Will not explain why.

Norik: president of the Creepy-Crawly Fan Club. Has been working in conservation efforts for endangered lizards and bugs for decades. Matoro thinks he's so cool and Kualus doesn't feel A Kind Of Way about that

Varian: prefers humans. Animal brains weird her out.

Kualus: has been fascinated by birds since he was a kid. You know that post like "oh you're a bird fan? Name every bird" and then they do? That's Kualus.

Ahkmou: says his favourite animal is snakes because snakes are cool and badass but actually it's goats.

[historia-vitae-magistras]

I'm curious on your take on the Ratman and ratlings' relationship with animals. Do you think they'd keep any and risk becoming attached? I feel this would outwardly effect Jack the most considering his love for all the weird shit they got in Australia but I think Arthur is also the type to be really hurt by the loss of a pet. But in a dad way. Like he'll begrudgingly take in the fucking cat one of his kids brings to his home out of the rain and the animal ends up being his partner in crime. He's stone-faced when it passes away and it takes a while for the pain to subside but he doesn't let it show for even a second. I don't imagine Matthew could handle the mental load of losing a beloved pet. Alfred is too fucking busy to properly care for one. Zee probably has a few birds whose babies she cares for for generations maybe a kiwi lol

TW for pet death

Alfred has had horses his entire life. He's got a ranch in his name somewhere where the descendants of the pair of horses, Liberty and Justice, that Matt gave him during the Civil War live. Justice got shot out from under him in 1864 but he went full Bury Me Not on the Lone Prairie, dropped dead of idk, the shits and when he was feeling better Liberty was getting her hump on with a local stallion so he just made a ranch there and their descendants still fuck amongst the grasses or however the prairies work. Liberty is immortal because fuck I already killed one horse this post and I'm already emotional.

Matt... He just kept trying. Nations have semi immortal pets. All he wanted was a goddamn friend. François gave him a lap dog when he was little. It died in its first Canadian winter as was often the fate of anything smaller than a terrier. He tried a newfie. It drowned. Finally, around the 1780s he had a little black and white working dog he named Sel et Poivre who lasted a decade. But eventually he got ripped up by a wolverine and Matt was damned to eternal loneliness until Arthur had mercy on him and got attached enough to the wee fat house lion he named Flufferton he didn't die. Matt's best friend for awhile and favourite heat source at his father's. Cue 1980 with Canada finally getting it's full independence and Jan dropping him like a hot rock and Alfred got him a Samoyed puppy in the aftermath. I've called this dog Kuma, Bud and Buckwheat before. The neighbor backs over him by accident! and Matt low-key has the worst mental breakdown of his life like he's 20 seconds from getting the axe and ending up in grippy sock jail. Then the pupper pops up licks him and Matt has the happiest sob fest for like a solid week. Finally! Immortal pupper. No more perishing.

Jack is a fun example because he's very in tune with the circle of lire and his favourite pet was a tortoise named Harriet he's had on and off since 1830 when she died in 2006. So when she finally died of natural causes he was absolutely fucking devastated. Didn't get out of bed for a week after the funeral, cried his eyes out every time he saw a turtle or tortoise for years. She was his baby since he was a baby. Closest thing to losing a childhood dog a nation can express. He had plenty of snakes and spiders and dogs that passed on and they made him sad but oh Harriet 😭.

Zee has a budgie named Pavlova that Jack got her when she finally dropped the family name. Just so she can say she owns Pavlova. It spent a week with Uncle Matt during hockey season and went back to Mum telling everyone, "Give your balls a tug, tit fucker" and making nondescript sobbing sounds. And the singular devotion with which New Zealand intervenes in its bird's well-being? Oh yeah, they're her children. Entire genomes of Kiwi-birds and Kakapo and Kea. She personally hunts rats that threaten their population like it's 1916, flashlight between her teeth, knife in one hand, Arthur sweating like mad somewhere. Bird watching is something she and the old man have in common so he probably does jokingly call them her grandchildren. Zee gets beat in the shin by a screaming kiwi-bird, and he just picks it up like, "Now that's no way to treat your mother, lad! Mind your manners." Before it toddles off and any on-looker is just pure, what the fuck.

[apirateslifeforbudgie]

Damn the Stars Snippet

Oh hey I just realized since I've made Carmen's crew and relationship known, I can post these two scenes I wrote a long time ago! Really hope they still read well~ Still trying to decide how mature I want to go with this spin-off.

But anyway, read below the cut!

“What’s taking so long?” Carmen was clearly limited on her patience as she sat between Heat and Wire in an open-style tent. For pirates, this was luxurious: comfortable individual seating, wine, an abundance of bizarre fruit native to the island. Their rainforest hideout lacked the castle though, and some of the enemy crew stood in front of the tent while they, too, awaited the arrival of their captain.

Heat leaned in, “I was wondering the same. The Titan Pirates have an impressive reputation. Not impressive enough to be worth this wait though.”

"They're keeping me from my captain..."

“Budgie,” Wire got the attention of the two to gesture his head towards the approaching host; a surprisingly handsome and well-built man with smooth tan skin, a close-cut beard, and medium length wavy, dark hair that was appeared wetted and slicked back. He was accompanied by the rest of his crew.

An arrogant smile on his face, the enemy captain took his time in sauntering to his guests, “Ah, the Wandering Star, Carmen Amsel,” the captain had stopped several feet away. “You seem more party favor than pirate.”

Some of the enemy snickered at their captain’s little quip - an allusion to the first article about her after she took up the life of a pirate.

Heat and Wire’s faces instantly showed scorn, but Carmen seemed neutral. Almost amused, even, as she rose to give her own greeting.

“The Giant’s Bastard, Guillermo Greave,” Heat and Wire stood as she spoke. “You seem more bastard than giant.”

Greave lit up with laughter. “You know how to handle yourself out here! You’re earning quite the reputation and the bounty to go along with it. Taking out Rush Black and his Salty Dogs entirely. And it was you who claimed the head of the second-hand of the Leviathan Pirates, was it not? He had a mythical Zoan – a nasty one.” He raised an eyebrow. “I am very curious about the Devil Fruit powers you possess. I wonder how true some of the stories are.”

All the while he was speaking, Carmen and her crewmates had been making their way closer to him, closing the gap he had left.

“I could give you a demonstration, or we could conduct business as intended,” the hint of arrogance and impatience was beginning to come through. “You’ve kept me and my men waiting long enough.”

“My apologies. I was simply making sure everything was in order and giving you and your men time to relax and enjoy some wine. I think you will be very pleased with what I have to offer.”

She raised an eyebrow, “I’m still waiting.”

Finally cutting any of the flattery, Greave turned to give a nod to his crew, and three men disappeared while he began his proposal. “Pirate alliances have been breaking in the papers often recently. Straw Hat Luffy and the Surgeon of Death, Trafalgar Law. Your own captain’s alliance with Scratchmen Apoo and Basil Hawkins. Straw Hat and the Surgeon have outed the purpose of their alliance with events unfolding in Dressrosa – one of the Four Emperors of the Sea. So, tell me, Wandering Star…”

There was a certain sureness to her as she listened.

“Which Emperor is your captain after?”

“Our goals are of no concern to you. News of pirate alliances does not make you a part of ours.”

“Ah, not yet at least,” Greave smirked as the three men returned. Each carried a treasure chest and placed them directly and individually in front of the three Kid Pirates, the one in front of Carmen being opened to present its glittering gold contents. “Whichever Emperor it may be, I am highly interested in having a hand in their fall.”

Carmen’s inquisitive eyes lifted from the treasure at her feet to look back to Greave as he continued.

“Consider this my demonstration. This is only a small taste of what I have to offer for my part in the alliance. My men and I have been doing well for ourselves in the New World even before your Captain and his second hand were Supernovas on the other side of the Red Line. We are well-established, and our abundance of gathered treasure would surely be of use when it comes to preparing for a fight against one of the Four Emperors. In fact, Carmen Amsel, there is more treasure waiting aboard your readied ship.”

“My ship?” that caught Carmen’s attention, and even won over a keener tone with a slight smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

“Oh, yes. It’s said that you have become the helmsman of the Kid Pirates - that above all, you love to sail. You will even take the ship out for fun, do you not? With your feats and talents, I say you have very well earned your own vessel. It’s the black ship at bay, fully prepared and ready to take to the seas! As I said, my men and I have done well for ourselves.”

Carmen lightly looked over her shoulder to playfully  address Heat, “This must be that impressive little reputation you mentioned,” she turned back to Greave, her eyes hard to read. “A nice island base, luxurious tents instead of a crumbling castle with plenty of gold and even a ship to spare…”

The Titan’s Bastard grinned at the recounting of his accomplishments, though his smile would soon fade with the turning of her tone.

“But what else have you done? What big names have you bested? So far, it seems you’ve left them all to us.”

“Like I said,” Heat spoke up – he wanted to make sure the entire crew could hear. “Not worth the wait.”

Greaves began to crack, his suave façade giving into frustration, “Not worth the wait?!”

“Trying to buy your way into an alliance?” Carmen maintained control. “Our first mate told me to expect this – that this might be the reason for you wanting an audience with us.”

“The first mate is who Eustass “Captain” Kid should have been wise enough to send to deal with such matters if he wasn’t man enough to face me himself. Instead, he sends his bitch!” he turned to his men to make a demand. “Take the gold!”

Two of the men reached for the chests in front of Heat and Wire while the captain himself outreached his hand to the open chest in front of Carmen. In unison, Wire stabbed his trident in front of his chest while Heat slammed his foot on top of his, leaning forward and in the position to breath fire. All this while Carmen dropped into a crouch, slamming the lid shut on her way down and nearly catching the Bastard’s fingers. She rested her cheek on her folded arms atop the chest.

“My gold,” she reminded him. “A gift given to me that I very much intend to keep.”

Angered and in shock, Greave took a step back and glanced left and right at her crewmates. “What are you doing?! We had a deal before you even stepped foot on this island. I promised no snipers and you promised me safe conduct! I’ve upheld my end of the deal and I expect you to do the same!”

“I promised not to use my powers,” she narrowed her eyes and darkened her tone. “No more. No less.”

"I've had my fill of you!” The Bastard’s demeanor was slipping even more into dissolve. “You are going to call your captain! I demand to speak with him!!”

She was growing evermore impatient – now flat and cold. “Tough shit, you’re talkin’ to me. I was sent because you were not worth my captain's time, and you were not worth the first mate’s time. If you were, the Massacre Soldier would have contacted you along with Scratchmen and Hawkins. But you were right…” she quickly opened the chest just enough to reach in and snatch a handful of the treasure inside. “This will very much help us. We’ll be sure to put it to good use.”

The enemy captain sneered at her, “You rancid little whore,” his words were dripping in disdain, and his men behind him readied their weapons.

“Careful, now,” she rose. “You make the first move and you’ll find your luxurious little hideout underwater.”

The tales of what could happen gave the enemy a pause.

“I’d rather not go back on my word today,” she continued and began walking away, her violet eyes on the fine jewelry hanging from her fingers. “Heat, Wire...do as you see fit. I think I’ll have a look at my ship.”

As Carmen set off towards the docks, flames spewed forth from Heat’s mouth.

_            _            _

Back at the Kid Pirate’s base, the three captains and Killer were finishing up lunch, their plates mostly clear save for Kid whose mind seemed to be elsewhere.

After enough bottled up agitation, Kid let out a growl, “They should be back by now. How long does it take to steal from a guy who has ‘bastard’ as a part of his title?!”

“Bastard?” Scratchmen questioned as he shoved half a slice of pizza into his wide-open mouth, an amused grin spreading across his face as he thought and chewed. “You sent her to deal with the Titan Pirates?”

“He said to steal from them,” Hawkins corrected his ally while gently dabbing the corners of his own mouth with a napkin. “Do you think that was perhaps not very wise?”

This delighted Scratchmen even more, “It’ll piss ‘em off, no doubt. You could have at least given the girl a little more backup! Would’ve let ya borrow some of my men if you had asked, Kid! Wouldn’t want our little Budgie getting hurt now, would we?”

The redhead’s short fuse was already reaching its limit, and he glared at the captain of the On Air pirates, a low growl escaping his lips as he stared the grinning DJ down.

Just then, the door opened and a group of Kid Pirates, including Haikei, Oscar, and Noe entered the dining room.

“Sorry to interrupt lunch, boss,” Oscar spoke first, but it was Haikei who gave the concerning news.

“We just thought you’d want to know there’s a strange ship docked outside next to the Victoria Punk…”

“What?!” Kid shot up from his seat to look out the blasted part of the dining room wall, Killer doing just the same.

“What the hell…?”

“Dammit, Budgie, I told you I didn’t want them to join!” Kid quietly hissed to himself.

“Surely, she wouldn’t…”

That prompted Scratchmen’s signature laugh. “I’m not surprised! I heard the Giant’s Bastard is quite the looker! Seems like he charmed his way into our little alliance!”

“Shut up!”

From the doorway, the group of pirates seemed unsure. “Umm…your orders, boss…?” Haikei was hesitant with his inquiry while the Hawkins read a floating card spread, and the Sea Roar continued to roar with laughter in the background. But he himself shut up once Carmen used her powers to descend into the open room, a smile plastered on her face and her body decorated with gems and jewels and layered gold jewelry hanging from her neck and wrists.

The moment she landed, her captain stormed up to her, jabbed his finger to the ship and demanded, “What the hell?!”

“I can’t wait to tell you!” she beamed, her eyes bright and full of cheer. But her expression and tone dried up when she looked to the two allied captains. “Get out.”

“This is an alliance, sweetheart,” the Sea Roar suddenly wasn’t so happy. “Whatever you have to say, we have a right to know.”

“And I thought we already addressed the matter of how you are to speak to us,” Hawkins added, snapping his deck from the air into his hands. “You do not give orders. You are not a captain.”

That rendered Kid irate, “I am a captain. Get out.”

With tensions rising, Killer, ever the level-headed one, spoke up. “Just give us the chance to get everything sorted out and settled. If there’s anything worth mentioning, we’ll discuss it at the next meeting so no one is left in the dark here.”

“Out,” Kid sternly reiterated.

The captains’ cooperation was reluctant and contemptuous, and once left with only those on his crew, Kid turned to the grinning girl with a look that demanded to know everything.

“The men you sent with me took care of the Titan Pirates,” Carmen was quick to oblige. “Every single last one of them. During negotiations, they offered up the ship with all the gold you were expecting and more,” her excited tone turned sweet. “It’s perfect, and I really want it to be my ship. Can I have it? Please?” she gently bit her bottom lip and pressed her hands together in a plea, all but bouncing in anticipation. “Can I, can I?”

A light groan told he was just relieved she followed orders...and that she had come back to him. “If it’s what you want, Budgie…The ship is yours.”

With a cry of excitement, Carmen jumped and threw her arms around his neck, “It’s the Black Star!” She released and took his hand, a smile still lighting up her face. “That’s what I’m calling it! There’s another perfectly good ship back at their island, but I only had enough men to get the Punk and the Black Star back here. If you want it, I can take some men and go get it another day.”

Those gathered in the doorway exchanges excited glances, and the Massacre Soldier spoke up. “It may not be a bad idea, but it will still take some time to gather crews for both ships and beyond if we want to start expanding that much.”

“That’s a given,” Carmen looked to the Massacre Soldier. “Maybe someday you’ll be the captain of that one,” then she turned back to her captain. “Or maybe give it to Heat as the captain and Wire as the first mate? That is, if it is your order to retrieve the ship, Captain.”

“Of course we’re getting the ship!” once again that menacing grin appeared on his face just at the thought of how the future was shaping up for him and his crew. “Good job handling the ‘Bastard’, Budgie. You’ve outdone yourself this time.”

Carmen was pleased with the fact that her captain was pleased. “And this is just the beginning. We started today with one ship, and now we have three. The possibilities are endless and the seas be ours, Captain,” she looked up at him with sultry eyes as she moved one of the gold chains from around her neck to his, hanging onto it from either side of the link. “From Captain to Commodore…” she pulled on the chain, bringing his face mere inches from hers, her honeyed voice confident. “And then King.”

[can-of-pringles]

Ok now you've got me thinking about those crack-y OC lore things, I don't have the editing skills to make one but here's like... my "script" for one of Gia:

*image of a medical office*

Doctor: hello and welcome to uhhhhh our medical study on cancer. what brings you here?

Gia: hi i have a Noble Cause my sister died of cancer 3 years ago and i want to help stop things like that from happening

Doctor: wonderful. come back to my Totally Not A Hoax medical room

*Scooby-Doo criminal unmasking*

Doctor: Aha it was a trick! This is HYDRA! Time to trap you and experiment on you because OSHA doesn't exist here

Gia: oh noooooo!!

*dramatic fizzle/fade/sway like a shitty Powerpoint presentation, or when characters fall asleep in B-movies*

Doctor: we're gonna take your life force out of your body. *hyperrealistic hands reach towards Gia and pull out something that just says "IDK SOUL I GUESS" in either Comic Sans or one of those Microsoft Word title fonts*

Doctor: now it's in this clover (*the same hyperrealistic hands carry the "soul" to a stock image of a four-leaf clover*) bc we didn't really think about where we were gonna put it when we took it out

Gia: Ow! Existential crisis! I can't really die anymore! Am I even human? Does this make me immortal? I have so many questions and I don't know what to-

Doctor: hey have you read Misery? The book not the movie

Gia: No why

Doctor: No reason

*stock image of an axe comes spinning in, unceremoniously chops off Gia's left leg at the knee, then both the axe and leg spin back out of the frame*

*TV static/"lost connection" scene just reading "this is all she remembers because of ~trauma~"*

*image of a run-down building in the middle of the city*

Gia: oh well I'm out of HYDRA now and my soul is still bound to this shitty little pot of clover so I guess I need to open a flower shop now.

*long pause*

Gia: also I might be clinically depressed

*another long pause*

Gia: well back to the flower shop

*magic wand floats in, waves a little spell, and with a cartoony "pop!", the desolate building becomes a small flower shop instead.*

Gia: I'm so glad I can pretend HYDRA never happened. Well except that I'm so anxious I can't leave the house and I think I have PTSD and also I'm still missing a leg. but I have a bird now *stock image of a blue-and-white budgie spins in and lands on her shoulder*

*doorbell chimes*

Kate Bishop: hello I'm here to pick up some flowers for my Avenger friend. purple please.

*romantic music, emoji hearts surround Kate, like a Looney Tunes character falling in love*

Gia: marry me. I mean here are your flowers *bouquet of violets passes from Gia to Kate*

Kate: oh by the way do you want to Not Be Afraid Of Life Anymore?

Gia: not right now but maybe if you keep whittling me down over the course of several months I'll change my mind

Kate: great I'll see you thursday

*closing music? or some other cheesy way to end it idk*

Omg I see it so clearly it's a masterpiece

'Doctor: we're gonna take your life force out of your body. *hyperrealistic hands reach towards Gia and pull out something that just says "IDK SOUL I GUESS" in either Comic Sans or one of those Microsoft Word title fonts*'

THE HYPERREALISTIC HANDS GOT ME

'*stock image of an axe comes spinning in, unceremoniously chops off Gia's left leg at the knee, then both the axe and leg spin back out of the frame*'

THE SPINNING AXE AND LEGS?! Fantastic I need 14 of 'em

'*long pause*

Gia: also I might be clinically depressed

*another long pause*

Gia: well back to the flower shop'

Gia... girl 😭 you need some cricket sounds or something in the pauses and then happy music when she mentions the flower shop like nothing just happened

'Gia: I'm so glad I can pretend HYDRA never happened. Well except that I'm so anxious I can't leave the house and I think I have PTSD and also I'm still missing a leg. but I have a bird now *stock image of a blue-and-white budgie spins in and lands on her shoulder*'

THE BUDGIE SPINNING-

[sidetongue]

living their best 

[upper-moon-4askblog]

The budgie finally notices urogi and starts to panic before huddling closer to Karaku as it chirps loudly as the budgie see him as a predator due to his features

— "Woah! Why are you so frightened of me, little one? Am I really that threatening..?"

His expression turns into a concerned one as he looks down at the Budgie and the way it seems to be so afraid of him.

— "Do I look scary..?"

He asks, sounding rather confused and slightly worried. His gaze is still fixed on the Budgie as he asks these questions.

Urogi also looks slightly alarmed when the Budgie sees him as intimidating.

— "Huh? Oh wait, could it be because I look like a bird?"

He asks, sounding puzzled as well.

— "Aww.. why can't we be friends..?"

He asks in a sweet tone as he gently pokes the Budgie with one of his talons, as if trying to get it to befriend him.

Karaku chuckles softly and reaches out his hand towards the Budgie, feeling bad for how afraid it is.

— "Here, come over here little Budgie~"

He says with a smile, beckoning the Budgie over with his hand. He looks down at it and says to it.

— "Why be afraid when I'm here with you~"

He continues, the gentleness in his voice seemingly making the Budgie feel safer.

[bluebudgie]

random ask and dunno if you said this anywhere else before, but how did Lahpp and Luqqah end up together? How was their relationship?

Lahpp seems the kinda guy who doesn't know where to start with anything romantic and somehow fell into it without knowing why (and why Luq went for him in the first place), and I'm curious to know.

Hi anon!! Glad you ask :> (Edit from Future-Budgie who has answered the ask: Oops this got long! Enjoy, I hope.)

They were assigned to work on the same project together in Thaumanova, a fairly standard asura tale I imagine.

The first time they met was... memorable for Lahpp at the very least. So he's introducing himself in the most proper way imaginable, mentions that he wonders if he hasn't seen her before - they did both go to Statics but considering he's a few years older they never shared classes directly. Still, might have crossed each other at some point.

Now Luqqah's introduction is essentially "Oh. You. I know about you. I looked through your medical records as part of a thesis-" Which, considering Lahpp's been trying his damn hardest to keep his medical history a secret from pretty much everyone at all costs, kinda makes him want to dematerialize on the spot. Until a second later... "Ultimately I decided to study someone else's case, yours was too mundane. Nice to meet you."

And for a moment he's not sure if he should be offended that she has the audacity to imply everything he's struggled with all life long is too mundane but... quite frankly he's just relieved to know she doesn't care. His biggest fear, dismantled right there. Off to a great start!

--

So they start working together in the following weeks, work goes really smooth, communication's spot on, they find out they've got some interests in common (mainly music theory), the chemistry's just right, you know. No pun intended. So they decide to give it a go, why not after all? They're stuck together for a while anyway.

Suboptimal decision, as they'll find out later. Their relationship is... a mixed bag. Platonically they're absolutely on the same wavelength, no issues here. Now the whole romance and intimacy part on the other hand.... ...that's pretty damn miserable. I'll leave the details up to your imagination but let's say there's... not much going on. For a good while they try, talk it over and over, really - Luqqah especially is invested - but it's so, so awkward everytime.

They still have amazing quality time sharing hobbies in the little spare time they've got allocated but unfortunately the longer the Awkward Romance drags on the more it seeps into the rest of their relationship and just... kinda sours the overall experience a little. Apparently not enough for either of them to end it. Perhaps it's the underlying fear of losing a good friend.

--

So they're in this kinda miserable "we would really be off better as friends" relationship for what... 2... 3 years? Luqqah goes having a little affair in the meantime (Inquisitor Dunnh, anyone?), time goes on, and on a fairly mundane but fateful day (that I won't describe in further detail now because this is already getting too long once again) Lahpp finally has the realization that'll free them both: "Oh I'm gay."

At this point he really doesn't wait much longer and just sits Luqqah down to have a talk. He feels like he owes her a quick end now and not waste her time much longer.

And he's so anxious. The generally collected, at this point fairly well-adjusted guy is stammering his soul out of his body dancing around the actual break up. Starting with the all time classic "I promise it's not your fault" and going into long-winded spirals of "you still mean a lot to me, but..." Lots of apologetic blah-blah that's going nowhere. Very unlike him. Anyway, Luqqah decides to gently cut him off with "Just get to the point." Well, turns out he thinks he may be gay. She stares. It's quiet for a moment. She smiles. "Well that explains a lot."

It's still a little awkward for a few weeks after that, but they remain close friends. Their relationship gets better. More relaxed. Oh, and Luqqah does tell Lahpp she cheated on him. He doesn't hold it against her.

And then some time later the reactor blows up and they go completely separate ways. After 10 long years they meet again during the events of End of Dragons in Cantha :>

[7ban-sama]

hai there 7ban! realistically, about the ❤️🤍💜 bird au , if the human vers of tsu, amane, and nene were to own bird versions of themselves, how would you think it would go?? would the birds mimick everything they do?? would they watch them having a threesome?? would nene and bird nene get along well?? would the twins with their birdselves get along well?? tell me what you think!

Oh hai there. It's so novel to get an ask about an eccentric AU like that. (In general, I'm surprised by how many people have paid attention to the bird AU...😶)

However I must say, I don't usually think about interactions between human and animal selves in AU, I don't really explore things like that? Usually I think about it like: in this world it's a roulette of which of the three are human or not, so you can have human Nene + parrot twins, or all 3 as birds, etc.

Still, I can try my best to answer your question, it's just that my honest opinion might be a little funny. So for starters, I want to say, I typically think of Nene as the human owning multiple birds. Parrots are especially demanding animals, considering how social and long lived they are, along with how sensitive they are to their environment. Ideally, if you were going to commit to owning something like that, you'd commit in-full. So it's a world where Nene devotes a lot of her time to entertaining and caring for her birds. For this question, let's imagine she owns the twins and herself as a bird, and separately she has befriended the Yugi twins as humans. Sometimes the twins come over and look at her birdies.

For how the humans feel about their bird selves, you have a spectrum of at best... neutrality. At worst, active dislike.

Nene is perhaps neutral on the little budgie Nene, maybe just glad her boys have a playmate they like? Budgie Nene just neutral about the human that tends to her, not really thinking about her much, preferring attention from the boys. She can give her self seed. Accept seed.

The Tsukasas do not regard one another. I do not see him. Just a natural [walks away from you] reaction. Bored.

Amane would HATE his parrot self, and they'd actively feel competition with one another. Because Amane is such a rude, domineering personality, they'd each be offended by how ballsy the other is.

The extent Amane would hate himself is so much more profound than the way Nene&Tsukasa are indifferent to themselves, I think it'd actively cause problems. Cuz you'd have like parrot Amane screaming and diving at him, preventing him from touching either budgie Nene (MY MATE!!!!) or human Nene (MY OTHER MATE!!!!!!!!!!) Amane would be like 💢💢 I hate this JERK that's TERRORIZING you two... He's terrible to the other one too. [regarding Amane parrot constantly scrapping with Tsukasa and pulling out his feathers] He's a nasty pervert... [whines] Yashirooo, are you really going to let your pet bully me... Fine, I won't come over, you're all obsessed with him-

⬆ This would really suck lol. But I think it'd be the reality, you can't have two Amanes in the room, they want to control everything and they don't like each other kfkf...

As for mimicry, they wouldn't pick up any notable tics from their human selves... I like tend to do my animal AUs a bit 'magically', even without literal magic. Soo like, it's kind of as if these birds truly have the 'souls' of Amane/Nene/Tsukasa, and their most individualistic traits are mostly something they innately have. I think what would sooner happen is that human Nene would note eerie similarities between her twin parrots and the twin humans, things she can't explain. Maybe the twin parrots 'talking voices' already sound kind of like the human twins, but this was the case before they ever met each other. Little haunting things like that... (she'd just dismiss herself though, feeling crazy, maybe too into her birds or something...)

If the human trio had sex in front of the bird trio... That's funny, I have to think of it as Nene putting them in their cage before anything went down... The birds wouldn't even register it as 'sex', just humans doing human things, as they enigmatically do. Maybe them all being in a pile would be like ? ?? weird... but w/e. [preens one another]

I'm imagining human Amane feeling some sort of I'm Doing This To Prove She Is Mine emotion tho lol, and the vibes would be kind of weird, because of that, like. Maybe Nene already would be like // /// geez he's so pushy rn... //// Barely let me finish putting everyone away before he dragged me off. Sigh... I'm being fought over... (???????)

All I can picture is chicanery along these lines basically lol. I suppose the driving force is the fact that the Amanes cant completely ignore the interspecies version of Nene/Tsukasa, but this will make one another mad. Which... is why I try to keep things contained in just the OT3 usually. No room for this many Amanes.

[grandmaster-anne]

My Memories of Princess Margaret

Who | Published 14 May 2020

Princess Margaret famously accessorised a cocktail in one hand with a cigarette in the other. But the fun-loving royal, who struggled to find purpose in the shadow of her sister Queen Elizabeth, proved she could rein in her vices when she had to give up smoking and drinking in her later years.

“I asked her, ‘Is it very hard?’” recalls her lady-in-waiting of three decades, Anne Glenconner. “She said, ‘No, Anne, once I make up my mind to do something, I do it’.’’ That was certainly the way she lived. In Lady in Waiting: My Extraordinary Life in the Shadow of the Crown, Glenconner, 87, opens a window into the royal world as it intertwined with her own.

Glenconner grew up in an aristocratic family; had a rocky marriage to fellow aristocrat Colin Tennant (who later became Lord Glenconner); and lost two of their five children (Henry died of an AIDS-related illness in 1990; Charles died of hepatitis C in 1996). She was an attendant at Queen Elizabeth’s 1953 coronation, joined Margaret on her many getaways to the Caribbean island of Mustique and watched as the princess’ own tempestuous marriage, to  photographer Antony Armstrong-Jones, crumbled.

But it was the simple times with Margaret that Glenconner treasures most, “when we were just together. Without our husbands.” Margaret, who died at age 71 in 2002 following a stroke, had a tender side too: When Henry was diagnosed with AIDS, “People were terrified about how you caught it,” says Glenconner. “But she always came and brought [ her children] David and Sarah, and she always hugged Henry.”

Even her biting wit had surprising heart. During a mid-flight storm, Glenconner became “nervous as we were bouncing about”, she recalls. “She put her hand on mine and said, ‘No point in being frightened, Anne, we’ll either be all right or we won’t. I think we might have another drink on the other hand.’ She always came up with good advice.”

The following are short extracts from the book, revealing previously untold details about the royal maverick …

In 1968, Margaret – then married to Armstrong-Jones and mother to David, 7, and Sarah, 4 – began planning a home on Mustique, where Anne’s husband, Colin, had given her land.

Although incomparable to a royal palace, Mustique offered Princess Margaret a break from her husband. Like Colin, Tony was unpredictable, sharing similar character traits: He was eccentric and extremely demanding, often rubbing people up the wrong way. But, just like Colin, he could be incredibly charming.

Everybody she had ever met had treated her in a certain way and there was Tony, being spiteful in creative ways, bothering to come up with nasty little one-liners to write down and hide in her glove drawer, with her hankies or tucked into books.

In the late afternoon we would often go and sit in Basil’s Bar, watching the sunset, sceptically waiting for the ‘green flash’ that is supposed to appear on the horizon just after the sun vanishes … We always seemed to be distracted by the thought, pausing our conversation to stare at the view, just in case we saw it. We never did but it became a fun habit.

In 1973, as Margaret’s marriage was falling apart, Anne and Colin introduced the princess to fun-loving landscape gardener Roddy Llewellyn.

Princess Margaret and Roddy had immediately clicked, even though Roddy was 17 years younger than her. [After a car ride, Anne’s son] Charlie explained, with a twinkle in his eye, that they had taken so long because Princess Margaret had whisked Roddy off shopping to find him some swimming trunks for the pool. With a big grin on his face, Charlie said that the trunks were so tight they could have been described as “budgie smugglers”. I said to Colin, “Oh, gosh, what have we done?”

When Roddy had been at [Anne and Colin’s estate, Glen] for about two days, he told me how beautiful he thought Princess Margaret was, and I said, “Don’t tell me, tell her.” So he did, and from then on, Princess Margaret and Roddy were inseparable, staying up late after dinner, sitting at one of the card tables in the drawing room after an evening of playing bridge or canasta … After the weekend in Glen, they were together for eight years, and friends for life, making all the difference to Princess Margaret who, by the time they met, had endured several years of unhappiness with Tony.

By the mid-1970s, Princess Margaret’s marriage was at breaking point, but with two children and being very religious, she didn’t want a divorce. In the end, Tony pushed her to it because in 1978 his mistress, Lucy Lindsay-Hogg, became pregnant with their first child.

Day after day there were screaming headlines, with pictures of Princess Margaret caught looking miserable, not helped by the fact that she had the type of face that looked sombre when she wasn’t smiling.

During this press-frenzied time, and in an attempt to escape their ghastly intrusion into her private life, over the next several months Princess Margaret would come quite frequently to stay with me in my Norfolk farmhouse or at Glen … Roddy would arrive later in the evening and I would leave them to relax. Going through such a private matter in public, and the scandal of being the first high-profile member of the royal family to divorce since King Henry VIII, was enough to make anybody need a friend.

Throughout countless hours together, Anne grew protective of Margaret, whose reputation as a demanding bon vivant had spread.

People complained about Princess Margaret being difficult, but I think quite often it was because she was bored or fed up.

She would often be invited to meet strangers at lunch or dinner but, not surprisingly, her idea of fun wasn’t sitting next to the mayor, the bishop, and the chief of police for Sunday lunch. When she was staying with friends, she didn’t want to be on show.

She also appreciated being asked what she actually wanted to do and what she wanted to eat but she often wasn’t. Great dinners would be arranged, when really she preferred much simpler food.

I minded very much when people complained about her behaviour. I knew she could be difficult: she was known for her icy stare if she felt someone had overstepped the mark, often accompanied with a curt remark normally with good reason. She had moments of being very grand indeed, but I worked round these ‘royal moments’, finding her quietly amusing. I didn’t like it when people criticised her, especially when she was already being hounded by the press.

In her later years, the single Margaret grew more dependent on Anne than ever.

In the years that followed, Princess Margaret had one or two more strokes and then her eyesight started to fail. Very quickly she lost it almost entirely. Having loved being surrounded by men, she now refused their company, even Colin’s, only feeling comfortable with a few female companions.

A few of us would regularly read to her and sometimes I would stay the night. Her taste in reading material was eclectic to say the least. On one visit, I arrived to find her extremely animated. “I’ve got a new book,” she said excitedly. “Would you read it to me? It’s all about seeds.”

My heart sank. A whole book about plant seeds. What could be more boring? I thought, but Roddy had given it to her, and not only was she thrilled but she was clearly genuinely interested. I got as far as a chapter on potatoes before saying, “Ma’am, are you really interested in this book? Should I carry on? Isn’t it rather boring?”

“Keep going, Anne,” she said, without missing a beat. “It’s fascinating.”

So, on I ploughed through that beastly book, but not without her stopping me several times and questioning my pronunciation, which she was always correcting. This was a habit of hers.

Anne had a front-row seat to Margaret’s complex and sometimes difficult relationship with her sister.

One day, the Queen came to tea with Princess Margaret. I stayed in the drawing room so they could have some time together and she went off to the bedroom to find Princess Margaret. Quite soon after she had gone in, she suddenly reappeared.

“Oh, Ma’am, is everything all right?” I asked.

“No, it isn’t,” the Queen replied. “Margaret is listening to [the UK radio soap opera] The Archers and every time I try to say something she just says, ‘Shh!’”

I wasn’t surprised. Princess Margaret’s defiant streak extended to her sister, despite her being the Queen. I had always noticed that she had a very subtle strategy for one-upmanship, which contributed to the bickering that went on between her and the Queen Mother.

I said, “Let’s go back up together.”

When we got into the bedroom, I said to Princess Margaret, “Ma’am, the Queen is here, and she can’t stay all that long. Would you like me to help pour the tea?” I switched off the wireless, made sure they both had a cup, and left the room.

Margaret died following a stroke on February 9, 2002.

The months after her death felt very quiet without Princess Margaret. She really was an extraordinary woman: If someone was anxious about something, she would always see the problem in an entirely different way, from a new angle, which would often help in finding a solution. Even now, when I’m faced with a problem, I wish she was here to tell me what she would do. Right up to the end, she stayed interested in the world around her. Life has not been the same without her, especially when I go to Mustique.

From the book Lady in Waiting by Anne Glenconner. Copyright © 2020 by Anne Glenconner. Reprinted by permission of Hachette Books, New York, NY. All rights reserved.

[akioukun]

15 Questions

Thanks for tagging me @neonponders love ya 🖤

Are you named after anyone?

Not that I am aware of. Name means…boy or ancestor of man or something along those lines

When was the last time you cried?

Broke up with my partner like two weeks ago, I cried during that. It sucked, haven’t cried since though been too busy. I get close everyday though 🫠

Do you have kids?

Nope

Do you use sarcasm?

I’m Australian its a big part of how english works socioculturally over here,so…ya (I’m sorry @neonponders I am the red flag 😔)

What is the first thing you notice about someone?

Intensity, either in expression or body language. People who are super intense or major extraverts overwhelm me and I’d rather avoid having that interaction at all and not walk away exhausted or questioning my life after being verbally run over.

What is your eye color?

Blue. Painfully blue. Annoyingly blue. A friend at a halloween party said to me “Man I can’t look you in the eyes they’re so intense” Alot of my friends don’t lmao. Still figuring out what to say when people compliment them. My go to rn is to go “oh these?” and pretend to pull them outta my head.

Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movies scary moviessss! I love horror films so much. They have so much range in them and the creativity needed to target that fear response within people can range from genuine to bizarre. Ohhh and if they miss the scary mark they just become the funniest shitpost ever. Love em!

Any special talents?

Anything that is considered a talent is probably something I’ve cultivated from a young age so nah

Where were you born?

Australia. I wont be more specific lmao

What are your hobbies?

Drawing, reading, hiking, climbing, surfing, lifting, cooking, piano and guitar, making a million playlists. I also paint murals in the local abandoned dam for fun if I get a free moment

Do you have any pets?

Two budgies! Zico and Ravi. They’re sweethearts

What sports do you play/have played?

I used to be in martial arts, state swimming and soccer stacked with a couple of the things above. Then I had nothing for a while due to medical complications that ruined the rest of my teen years. Now its just bush hiking and surfing. I love solo stuff

How tall are you?

5’8 I think (172ish?)

Favorite subject in school?

Art. Easy. It was the break from the hell that was all the academics. I also enjoyed english and history but mostly coz I slept in the afternoon classes and no one bothered me.

Dream job?

Studio director. Would be dope to run a studio of my own/with my friends. Stuffs kinda happening right now thats gently pushing me in that direction. Idk big dreams and I’m just riding whatever comes my way right now.

Anyone wants to do this just tag me! no pressure on people tagged to do:

@paaansy @prettyboybillyhargrove @bigdumbbambieyes @ihni