#oh my god oh my god i NEED TO WORK ON NANOWRIMO BUT THIS FIC HAS CONSUMED MEEEEE

[rosyredlipstick]

oh my god im trying to get the space fic out as soon as possible because i need time to plan for nanowrimo but oh my GOD this chapter so long oh my god ???? how do i still have 13 scenes to write ????? IT IS 26K????

[mamawasatesttube]

just finished batgirl (2000). am going to be lying on the floor marinating in thoughts and feelings for the foreseeable future

[tryan-a-bex]

100 fics

Today I posted my 100th fic on Ao3!

My first was Pottery; or Function, Purpose and Heart on Mar 11, 2023. It was a retired Dreamling fic with Destruction (who I call Joe) as the main character.

I moved fairly quickly into my Spy x Family crossover series. Anya is so cute, and throwing her in with Dreamling and the Endless family led to a lot of fun shenanigans! (Generally you don't need to know Spy x Family canon to follow these.)

Next I started on my Sandman x Scooby Doo shenanigans! I really like the Scooby Gang, and there are definitely some mysteries to solve surrounding the Endless! (With awesome art by @sab-draws!)

Gaulcienne caught my eye next. Lucienne, my beloved librarian, and the shape-changing dream-fairy? Oh yes! A Quiet Love with Wings has most of my commissioned art, with pieces by @athymelyreply for Sometimes when You Fall, You Fly, @ibrithir-was-here for Fireflies and a Missing Person, and @designtheendless for The Dragon Rider!

King of Night and Prince of Day, for @nathanwonderwolf's wonderful art, has the second highest kudos of all my fics.

Then I invented an OC who is the preteen personification of the consciousness of humanity, aka Social Media. I thought this was pure crack but people liked it and now it's a series! Dinner and Play was created with @carnelianmeluha's food ideas in mind!

My Dreamling works tend to be short and sweet, often prompted by something on tumblr or discord, and are collected as Dreamling vignettes.

I have recently written (but not yet posted) my first honest to god smut, but early dabbles in the craft were mostly crack, like my Helm Fucking Crack series. I'm unreasonably proud of how cracked it is, and thank everyone who enabled me (notably @sleepsonfutons, @windsweptinred, @tickldpnk8, @zzoomacroom, read their fics!).

My obsession with Fuckboi Dream (mind the tags) is ongoing, and included creating a chapter index with notes so I can find things, a series about Murphy's childhood (somebody please read these, they are so cute), and others, fanart as well!

In The Dragon's Tongue, Lucienne takes on Titania! I commissioned @lostelfwriting to write the bdsm continuation of the scene, and she did a fantastic job!

A Reunion in the Dreaming (picnic recreated here) was the first fic in Walking with the Walkers, my series about Rose, Jed and Unity. It features Rose and Ara (Barbie transformed in Life is but a Dream), Rose and Jed meeting their Endless family members, Jed and Gault having adventures, and Unity throwing family parties in the Dreaming (with art by @ilya-halfelven).

Trials of a Shapeshifter in Love (in which Gault tries to surprise Lucienne with a romantic dinner) was my favourite fic from October 2023 -- Femslash weekend (by @sandmanfemslashfans ) and Monsterfucktober (by @seiya-starsniper and friends) made it a really fun month! I also wrote Chantal and Zelda, Johanna and Death, and zombie Lyta (my most angsty fic, I believe).

Just Get Me Off the Damn Mountain was written for designtheendless' contest and omg, I won! It is my most popular fic, at 185 kudos!

I also wrote an OG story for NaNoWriMo! At 23k, Wander Witch is by far my longest story (the next longest is under 9k).

After a bit of being stuck, I got started again by writing continuations of @gabessquishytum's asks! Thank you to Gabe and to all the anons and contributors who allowed me to post their parts of the story!

Asmi, @weirdly-specific-but-ok, argued that he does not have a fandom, so (with permission) I proved him wrong by writing fanfic where he meets Crowley and the Maggot Fam. I love you, Asmi and the maggots!

Heading on an Adventure, the story of Rose and Orpheus' road trip, led to a series of library adventures for Lucienne (often featuring Meowpheus), starting with The Library Cat and continuing in the Lucienne my Beloved series.

I wanted more Lucienne and Walkers content, so I started a side blog, @lucienne-my-beloved, and am open to prompts there! On ao3, the series is called ficlets for lucienne.

Hob Meets the Doctor June 7, 2389 and The line I will not cross and the line I will (Gaulcienne) are my space fics, and I am unreasonably happy about them!

I'm now writing for @augustwritingchallenge! (They got me over 100 in my wips a week or two ago!) I combined prompts so you'll see a fic every 2-5 days in various series and fandoms, including Good Omens (Aug 30) and Dead Boy Detectives (soon).

And my 100th fic! Why are you whispering? a Jed and Rose fic for the late night call prompts. Woohoo!

Thank you so much to everyone who has supported my fandom journey! I'm the least depressed one in my long covid cohort, due to your support and friendship! I cherish every kudo and comment and bookmark and reblog, and the art and fics you all create as well!

[kaihuntrr]

Sea Prince: 2024 Plans!

Hello hello! No new art for now (currently I’d like to focus on my personal OCs before I settle back in to drawing things for the AU) but I got some lovely updates for the future- likely the rest of the year, actually!

I will say- thank you all so much for your support and love for the fic, even if it’s barely begun! There’s so, so much in store for this AU you won’t even believe it!

It’ll be a long post, so here’s the TLDR; Act One is complete, it only needs to be edited and beta read! + Act Two is currently in production

Thank you all so much <3 now, unto the nitty-gritty below!

First things first, how is the AU faring?

I wrapped up the entirety of Act One in November (you could say the second half of TSP was my Nanowrimo, as I wrote about 48-51k words that month- and Act One sits pretty at 112k!) and currently my good partner in crime @mewhoismyself is editing Chapter 20! We’re starting back up after the new year celebrations, and I’m happy to say we’re pretty rested and hyped to present Act One’s entirety! The schedule is the same as always (chapter every other week) just to keep a good distance between where you guys are at and where we’re at, so no sudden hiatuses!

As a treat, here are the chapter titles for the posts after the upcoming one! I feel I’d be spoiling the surprise if I announce the title now.

OH! And Act Two has officially started production!

I am currently in the process of writing the prologue (I’ve mapped out the timeline of Act Two during my December break), and it’s exciting to say the least.

Of course I can’t share any details (wouldn’t want to spoil anything ;) ) but I’m excited for you to get here!

My goals for this year is to complete Act Two and Three!

Mostly just working on Act Two and bullet out Act Three (at this point, I am aware of roughly everything that will happen from Act One to Five) so that’s fun!

Another question- will the other Life Series be canon (ie. Secret Life)?

I mean, prooobably? This is a pretty lengthy fic so I can imagine some hints/ easter eggs could be fine but I’m focusing more on the first four series (and personally I wasn’t super into Secret Life, but that’s just a me thing, not a plot thing)

I’m considering doing that Flower Husbands AU for Secret Life, but for now I want to focus on this AU and the four series it’s based on.

Here’s a random fun fact that I’m a bit miffed about but I’m sure will be worth the payoff- I love, love Scott and Pearl’s dynamic in this fic a LOT (god forbid the four playlists I made for this AU and one of them is JUST those two.) but you don’t see their dynamic until a certain point. grrr.

Not sure if I’ll ever have these playlists go public, but if you’d want to hear em let me know and I’ll switch em on!

So yeah, that’s all for now! I hope everyone is just as excited as I am, and I cannot wait to show you what’s behind these curtains. See you in the next chapter!

[nightimedreamersworld]

Wip Wednesday

Thank you for the tags today, lovelies @aroace-genderfluid-sheep and @forabeatofadrum your wips are so good ❤️

I've been a bit out of the loop for the past couple weeks, so still looking through past WIP posts I've missed, but everything rn is so good. I'm so excited to see what yall have come up with for podfest!

Right now, I'm still focused on my two wips for CORB (which starts in two weeks 😳). I admit I'm not as far along as I'd like on either fic, so I'm doing NaNoWriMo as a way to try and write as much as possible this month.

Here's a snippet of each, both Simon POV

Wip#1 (as of yet untitled, help):

“Do you believe in prophetic dreams?” I ask over a mouthful of scone.  This time, I ambush Penny during breakfast, no need to wait too long.  Her eyebrows shoot up. “Oh, I think so? Like, divination—”  “Is a whole science, as well as Oneiromancy, yeah, yeah.” Her frown deepens even more, and I push on. “But can you, like, predict the future through dreams?”  Penny chews, pensively. “It’s possible,” she finally says. “But it isn’t simple. Our dreams—”  “Can’t show us the whole truth, yeah, I know.” I pull at my hair; we’ve had this exact conversation before, haven’t we?  Penny crosses her arms. “Well, if you already know everything, then why are you asking me?”  “Forget it,” I mutter. “It’s just…”  Across the dining hall, I catch Baz looking at me, head cocked to the side. His hair is perfectly slicked back. It wasn’t like that before.  I look back at Penny. “I had a dream. About Baz.”  She rolls her eyes. “Don’t tell me about it. You know erotic dreams don’t necessarily reflect on people’s inner desire—”  “What?” I sputter. Erotic? Baz?

For wip#2, have a bit of Simon thirst:

I have no problem admitting Baz is fit as fuck; anyone with eyes can see that. Thing is, that just makes working with him even worse.  It should be a redeeming quality, but somehow Baz manages to weaponize his looks as well. He’s just better than everyone else, in every aspect, and he knows it. I can’t wait to find out all the ways he’ll rub his hotness in my face when we’re pressed up together, hanging by a strap God-knows-how-many feet above the ground.  I drag myself to the gym, already knowing he’ll be there. Silently taunting me.  He’s already up on his canes, one arm outstretched, the other one holding up the weight of his whole body. Both his legs are pointing to the right. His shirt is a light pink, almost sheer, dotted with a pattern of delicate flowers. It shows off the dark hair on his chest, and I have to make myself look away.  Most performers shave off—I don’t even need to, my body hair is just naturally sparse—but Baz never does. Maybe he thinks he’s better than the rest of us in that regard, too.  Like this, I can count all his ribs. His arse looks criminal. His movements look graceful and fucking ruthless at the same time.

Tagging a few friends: @artsyunderstudy @rimeswithpurple @cutestkilla @bookish-bogwitch @facewithoutheart @alexalexinii @j-nipper-95 (see above: the fruits of our sprints lol) @valeffelees @prettygoododds @captain-aralias @letraspal @hushed-chorus @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @confused-bi-queer @whogaveyoupermission @larkral @iamamythologicalcreature @whatevertheweather @stitchyqueer @martsonmars @aristocratic-otter @blackberrysummerblog and anyone else who'd like to join!

[thewordworrier]

April Camp NaNoWriMo - Day 17

Words Written Today: 799 / 700 words. Today’s Goal: 11,900 words. Today’s (Total) Word Count: 14,470 / 21,000 words. Worked On: ~ a little messing around brainstorming of a different thought based on a dream I had. ~ a bit of the February fic. Favourite Line: Because it was more brainstorming and figuring things out; bare bones writing, you can have this single thought.

Yeah, my brain decided Ray needs constant guitar god status and frankly? It’s so real for that.

I mean, it's not wrong. Oh, and actually you can have this from the February Fic:

Frank laughed. “No, no you really don’t. But you do give off a different air when you’re mad, and that can be a bit unnerving.” “Aw!” Shelly lent up to ruffle his hair. “Is the big, scary, big bad wolf frightened of little ol’ me?”

Two snippets!

I don't have a lot of "life stuff" to say at the moment so... 🤷🏼‍♀️

[eurydicees]

idk how I missed all of ur posts about the hq pacrim au until this morning??? but now that ive been exposed im so excited oh my god (I am Very Normal about both of these things)

anyway what does raptor three look like? is it just a crimson typhoon kinda setup? who works on her? (ik u said hanamaki and matsukawa were jaeger techs but these r big ol bots and I can't imagine those two work on All of them especially when they designed Blue Castle so they know her specifically in and out)

also kuroken k-sci division, pls tell me more about kuroken k-sci division🙏🙏🙏

oh my god SO sorry this took me a hundred years to get to! i got busy and lost track of this au…but it has been reborn in the form of my nanowrimo project LOL. you (and anyone/everyone) should continue to ask me about the pacific rim au please and thank you. so many things have changed since my first posts !!!!! 

also this ask did remind me that kuroken were going to be the scientists, which i had lowkey almost forgotten about when i restarted the fic on april 1, so ty ty ty for that. here’s some more about them and the jaegers under the cut ! 

kuroken: 

first off, they didn’t know each other before coming to work at the shatterdome together! the only people who knew each other before coming together in tokyo were iwaizumi and oikawa, the rest of the haikyuu characters involved have never met before. there will be no explanation for this

kenma was recruited in his first year of university because he was posting his theories and amateur research online and it caught the attention of people with resources who wanted to see if he could find anything if given access to more tech and info than his dorm room gamer setup 

turns out that yes, yes he can find things if given more resources. he’s the one who comes up with the theory about kaiju attack patterns and the increasing rate etc etc 

kuroo, for his part, became a researcher in the science dept after incessantly sending his findings to whoever he could get in contact with, knowing he was On To Something and needed resources to share it

kenma is one of the people he gave his research to (twitter besties!), and kenma invited him to the tokyo shatterdome to work together

turns out that working together is frustrating sometimes but they love nothing more than to constantly annoy each other <3 but they do respect each other’s work even if they don’t always agree on methods or conclusions 

ex. kuroo’s research was founded on samples he got from the black market; kenma’s research is all too theoretical for kuroo; etc etc 

daichi and suga’s jaeger 

so ngl i forgot that asahi was originally a part of this

he is not longer a part of this

rip raptor three

anyways daichi and suga now pilot a mark-3 together called raptor flight. i’m imagining something like saber athena, which is from uprising but who cares. i can do whatever i want 

most important features of raptor-2: fastest model to date, extremely acrobatic/dextrous/agile, equipped with ionic twinblades (she gets two swords <3 ) that can be synced/combined into one stronger weapon (are you seeing the references i am making. are you seeing them), and an n-16 particle charger (plasma cannon thing) 

i’ve decided that asahi is the main tech for raptor-2 (hey he’s still here! yay!). he was also the main designer and tech for daichi and his sister’s jaeger, ursa juliet, before his sister dies and the model is ripped apart 

daichi is on the right in both raptor-2 and ursa juliet; suga is on the left in raptor-2 

iwaoi’s jaeger

blue castle is going to be vaguely modeled after striker eureka 

trivia fun fact of the day: striker eureka was planned to be the main jaeger in the movie until they were like well actually this robot is too cold and arrogant appearing to be the hero robot. this is deeply funny to me and also why it is perfect for blue castle 

blue castle is a mark-2 and was an experimental design by two intern jaeger tech development scientists, hanamaki and matsukawa (who get promoted to active jaeger techs as soon as blue castle is successfully put into use) - as the years go on, this design becomes a pretty common basis to design off of for future models 

most important features: extremely strong, aerodynamic, stable, and agile, equipped with 4.211 brass knuckles (exactly what it sounds like) and assault mount 3.25 sting blades (two swords attached to arms), missile launcher mounted in the chest, and advanced displays in the conn-pod which allow them a 4-way view of their surroundings

also not unexpected, but worth saying: iwaizumi is on the left, oikawa on the right 

jaeger visuals

ok so i wrote all of that out and then i found the pacific rim: uprising jaeger design maker thingy online here and i decided i’m bored enough to do that actually. these aren’t , like, exactly what i’m imagining, so kinda mush together the canon jaeger references with these generated images lol. i’m gonna try so hard to describe them in the fic. we’ll see how that goes. 

anyways, blue castle to the left and raptor-2 on the right! and below is striker eureka to the left and saber athena to the right. anyways i’m having SO much fun with this jaeger generator from 2018 lmfao can you tell 

overall. aaaaaa.

im so excited to be coming back to this. anyways more in my #hq pacrim au tag (though much of that is outdated) or eventually also in my #april nano 2024 tag !!!! and pls pls pls come talk to me about it !!!!!

[goingsparebutwithprecision]

Fic writer interview

Thanking @sinni-ok-sessi for the tag!

How many works do you have on AO3? 13

What's your total AO3 word count? 50455 - holy shit, a whole nanowrimo!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Sleeping Arrangements (Good Omens) Habitual (Good Omens) Project New Hope (MCU) Passing the Time (Star Trek:DS9) With Friends Like These (Star Wars, The Mandalorian)

I think I kind of already knew about the top 3, but I would not have called the last two. Nice to see With Friends LIke These doing well, that was so much fun to write but I never felt like it found its audience, y'know

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Mostly not, alas - it feels very awkward to just repeatedly say Thanks <3, however genuinely and enthusiastically I would mean that! I want emoji reacts to AO3 comments, that's about the level I'm at. That being said, I'll try to make the effort if someone's written me an essay, because it's so cool to get that and I've had some really fun conversations that way

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? I don't really do angsty endings. I've been known to write angsty fic, but I'm usually ending on an upswing...Story-Wise is probably the closest, being as how it's heavily implied that everybody involved is dead, and also Bilbo walks away at the end, but even that to me is more bittersweet than angsty.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? Not Story-Wise, and probably not Lethe. But with the rest I don't know that there's much between them. The ship ones tend to end with a get-together, the dealing-with-shit ones tend to end on a found family gathering, and the funny ones end on punchlines; they're all happy but no stand-outs, if that makes sense.

Do you write crossovers? Write? Sure. Plan out intricately and in great detail? Absolutely. Finish? Never in my life. I tend to have the idea for a lot of crossovers too, but very few of those ever get started. Off the top of my head, the current list includes a Star Trek AOS/Disney's Atlantis fusion, thousands of words of BBC Merlin is happening in Starfleet now, a few incoherent sentences of post-Burial Mounds Wei Wuxian having absorbed all of its ghosts a la Matthew Swift of Blue Electric Angels fame, three scenes of Person of Interest and Castle, several pages of Phryne Fisher and Diana Prince are besties - ohhhhh, and my beloved "Oh Good, My Sith Found the Chainsaw" Star Wars/Lilo and Stitch nonsense, which is the only one of these I have any intention of finishing.

Have you ever received hate on a fic? Not as far as I remember. The closes I ever got was someone commenting on Project New Hope in a very "trying to start a fight about MCU Civil War" way, but claiming they agreed with my opinion on it despite MCU Civil War very much not happening in that universe. Very odd.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Not really? The closest I've gotten in anything published is the blowjob letter in And With It My Constant Mind, which is more of an extended sext, and the ending of Untitled #3...the theme seems to be Cyrano De Bergerac and blowjobs, so make of that what you will.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not as far as I know

Have you ever had a fic translated? No.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Involves too much unfortunate-ordeal-of-being-known, I'm afraid. I'm in awe of people who do this though, the process mystifies me.

What’s your all-time favorite ship? I am invoking my god-given bisexual right not to choose. I cannot do it. Simply impossible. Cyrano/Christian/Roxane of Cyrano de Bergerac fame is probably a front-runner though.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? Lin Chen's Hanahaki Research Project - I was having a lot of fun with character voices and style, and it was challenging me as a writer in interesting ways, but I think it needs more research and investment and full Nirvana in Fire rewatches than I'm ever going to commit to.

What are your writing strengths? Comedy, yearning, and sentences that sound good when you read them aloud.

What are your writing weaknesses? Actually finishing things and comedy (I contain multitudes)

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? Absolutely do not have the confidence to do that, thank you and good night.

What was the first fandom you wrote for? By published work, the MCU, unpublished I was not immune to Supernatural

What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? Was not expecting this to be the trickiest one to answer, what the heck. Ummm. Idk. I get more enthused by specific ideas than by specific fandoms, I think - if I actively want to write for something it's because I've been Seized By An Idea(TM), Taken Hostage By An Idea, Had My Whole Brain Rewritten To Think Constantly About This Idea, rather than like abstractly, huh, it would be fun to write something for X

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? I-love-all-of-my-children-equally.gif. No, that's a cop-out. Um. Usually I think whatever I've written most recently gets the most affection, so With Friends Like These is bang at the top. And With It My Constant Mind I suspect is going to have the most longevity at the top of my list, I was living with that one for years and I'm really really proud of how it turned out.

Right, no pressure tagging @starkey @missfangirll @july-19th-club @ereborne and any other writerly folks lurking out there who are interested :D

[cumbiazevran]

[Belated] End of the Year Fic Writer Round Up

tysm @aria-i-adagio for tagging me! I’m tagging @nightgnome and @transfenris-truther but also anyone else who wants to jump in.

Overview. I need to get better at posting things and being consistent with my own writing.

During 2022 I begun two different Dragon Age related works: And The Lovers, Do They Dream? which is a retelling of how Arviraven Lavellan, Inquisitor and Dorian Pavus fall in love in my own canon. I also began writing, and have posted updates, of The Song of Dirthalath. It shouldn’t be news that I’m compelled by the Elvhen Pantheon, so I decided to write an explorative piece that follows an unrecognised member of said pantheon (Dirthalath, a companion of Dirthamen).

For that piece alone I can’t not mention @atypicalacademic: Kani, my beloved, I hope the day I stop learning things from you is the day I day. Long live to our federated republic of Bharata-America brand of dialogue we have going on for both the ancient elves and current Thedas. Love that for us.

My Nanowrimo project is not DA related, however, but if you like my writing please give it a shot. It’s called “As The Covered The Sun With Swords They Had Bloodied, I Found Your Eyes Like A Worship Song of Old”. This is a spin-of of a pirate au by @ilyamatic but it is meant to stand on it’s own as a completely original piece. It is, in fact, the first original narrative piece I publish/post anywhere. It is also a gift for my friend @valhallanrose.

The story follows Aelius Anatole Radosevic, Inti Ankuwilla, a mixed Quechua man who works as an accountant for several Pirate clients and falls in love with Tamryn Olenev, a Polish, Ashkenazi inventor and chemist.

Other finished works include (those which have been posted will include a link):

Death in the Family, the backstory of my DND oc Frazier Arnell

Nettle, for Cruelty, a Charlie Hawke fic

Words written (published or not, WIPs included!): I tried to count them and I failed miserably. I want to think they’re around the 75,000 mark.

Smut scenes.  Unsure of the number but my favourites to write in 2022 have been:

Anything I’ve written for Anatole and Tamryn.

There’s one particular fic I have not published about Tia (@atyipicalacademic’s) and Dirthalath that lives in my mind rent free

There’s a particular scene in The Song of Dirthalath, between him and Dirthamen where the latter Redacts the living hell out of the former bc they’re neurodivergents in love  

I wanna write this year one of June and Sylaise, tho

New things I tried. Publishing something lmao (Worship song of Old), Nanowrimo, “And The Lovers, Do They Dream?”. This one because the writing style is gothic romantic and has a lot of magical realism which is NOT my strongest suit, but on God I will write it.

Fic I spent the most time on. The Song of Dirthalath and Worship Song

Fic I spent the least time on. Audacious Hearts or The Tale of the Champions, and anything that involves my Wardens. I just spend more time on them

Favourite thing I wrote. A WORSHIP SONG OF OLD. THIS IS LITERALLY MY FAVOURITE THING I HAVE EVER EVER WRITTEN.

Oh, and this epistolary from Dirthalath to Dirthamen

Favourite thing I read. Making me choose is violence but I’m gonna be hyper specific here. Kani Atypicalacademic wrote a bit of his Navin Cadash meeting my Arviraven, where the guy straight up kisses his hands, anchor and all, within the first 10 minutes of knowing him bc he’s thankful about Arviraven helping his brother and BROTHERS IN DRAGON AGE IT HAS NEVER LEFT ME.

[orangepanic]

1, 6, 11, and 16 please.

1. Do you have a word-count goal for the upcoming year?

Nope. I've never had a time-bound word count goal outside of the two times I've tried to do NaNoWriMo. The story is as long as it needs to be.

6. Which yet-to-be-started fic is first on your list?

Oh gosh. All of them. It depends on the day. I had three new ideas just this morning. I think of big projects though I'd like to start a gap-filler of the time just after the end of season one that covers the various trials that followed Amon's revolution. I think it was a pretty bad time.

11. Would you like to try any new fanfic genres or tropes this year?

I've had a time travel fic rolling around in my head for a while. It's not a high priority, but I'm interested enough I might give it a whirl.

16. Do you have that one fanfic that you wrote a ton for, ages ago, but never posted? Will this be the year, come hell or high water, that it WILL get finished and posted?

Oh god. You had to ask this one, didn't you? I have just over 110,000 words of Firestorm, the third work in my Irosami canon divergent series, sitting in a google doc. I'd started publishing it more than a year ago, but the story got away from me a little and I pulled a lot of it down to re-work. I'd really love to get it to where I want it and put it back up this year. But I said that last year, too. We'll see. Fingers crossed.

Ask me stuff about next year!

[sevdrag]

dreamwidth update: GYWO 2022 and How I Fucked Up

no, this is not the post about job search depression. not yet.

I participate in Get Your Words Out every year as something that motivates me to make words, much like NaNoWriMo -- it isn't necessarily about "winning" either, but it's about having a reason to track words, which then becomes having a reason to write. In 2020 or 2021, I forget which, I managed to write somewhere near 350,000 words. What a fuckin' banger. A lot of it was Old Vines, and some of it was work words, and all of it was fun as hell.

The thing I noticed at the end of the year, however, was that my writing was just inconsistent -- I was carrying myself towards that goal with days where I wrote 5000, 7000 words in one day, and then not writing for the next 4 days in a row. So if I could get my ASS to the COMPUTER to do the THING, i usually could get a significant number of words done. So let's focus on that, sez my brain, and we'll be a super-writer.

2022 Sev said well, hey, there's a habit pledge for GYWO, so: I took it, with the rather extreme idea of writing 240 days out of the year. that's like 4-5 days a week. But hey! It isn't wordcount! Although I still fucking decided I was going to try to write 300,000 words. just 300K. Not 350K. lol. I'm stupid.

Then at the beginning of 2022 I lost my content writing job - more like, they hired someone full-time and let all the contractors go without warning, yes, I'm still mad - and therefore lost one of the major impetus for me actually sitting down at the computer to write. Plus, I'd been counting work words as part of the yearly target -- which I think is fuckin fair when you write for a living, yeah?, so.

And then as I realized other work had also dried up and I was going to have to start major job hunting - and then the experience of that job hunting - there was a depression zone where I absolutely dried up on words. Like, nearly completely. Most of my WIPs just kind of hung in space, and I had to start an entirely new Good Omens fic (forth the fifth) to have anything going on, and THEN it was only a super-hyperfixation on Detroit: Become Human that really pulled me out of the wordslump and back into writing things. Getting back to the WIPs has been challenging.

And with my new job, there aren't wordcounts I can tally towards anything -- I'm writing and editing at the same time, and sometimes working on things like how the fuck do we cite this and a surprising amount of meetings, and the moral of this story is that I'm unlikely to make either my formal or informal GYWO target this year -- which again, I don't do it for the win, but boy howdy did I misjudge this year.

And what have I learnt about my writing process this year? Since that was the entire point of trying a new target and a new approach? Well, fuck, I'm not sure I've learnt anything, except that it's more fun to write when people are directly cheering you on, which isn't anything new. As of today I've written about 150K, and 135 days out of the year. I am 69 days behind where I should be and there are like. Idk. 70 days left in the year? So obviously I'm not gonna make it lol.

Anyway this has been a long ramble about things that are only important in my head, with no real conclusion. Clearly I am a professional! And I need to get back to actual work!

Stay tuned for NaNoWriMo, where I try to get my 3 FTH fics out in a month while still updating at least 3 WIPs! oh my god, why am i like this? I'm so stupid?

Talk to me about your 2022 writing (or creating in general, if you're a creator but not a writer!). How did you do. How dumb am I. It is a mystery!

comments Comment? https://ift.tt/X8wGCPg

[sheyshocked]

Man I absolutely freaking love your SiMarkus short fics!! It's the stuff I look forward to reading every time I had a long day, the way you write their dynamics is so addicting and by the way (I kinda feel sorry for Redon who always has a chance to get shoved in the pantry because he's just being him haha) like Simon and Markus are just two husbands in love??? And make you go 💞💞💞💞 also the way you never fail to mention their flaws and write it in a good way into the story because obviously not every android you see can act in whatever way possible like a human could (*cough* like Simon when in bed *cough*) it's so good and it basically made me say "alright this is canon NOW."

Also, Simon, an old PL600 model, the fact that you mentioned that he took a little bit more time to wake up in the mornings and him being sometimes confused because he's an old model who doesn't immediately know what to do, makes me love him and your writing more! They're androids too and they're different models with different workings, I don't think I could find much fics that mention these kinds of things.

I love ur writings and I hope I could read more of ur lil simarkus series like 'Markus Manfred's Happy Family'

*Shey.exe stopped working*

Oh my god, that's so sweet, I don't know what to say? You've just single-handedly made my day, thank you 💙💙💙

Yeah, poor Redon, that he has to put up with them at times. But maybe, just maybe he'll pay them back in the future 😉 We'll see about that.

I'm glad you like the small individual flaws and quirks I gave them, I always try to take into consideration that they are still androids, even though very human-like and feeling. It adds to the flavor, ya know?

Don't worry, I will definitely write more about them. I still have big plans for the series (after all, they still need to get married for real). Just don't know when I'll be able to return to it, since I'm finishing NaNoWriMo this month (I'm editing my original novel rn) and finals start right after that. But I'm looking forward to it, I miss the boys a lot!

Anyway, thanks again for this message, it warms my heart that you enjoy my writing so much 💙

[upsidedownknight]

does my brain not realize how pointless it is to get mad at myself for not writing. dude that is the opposite of the point, here.

[pastelwitchling]

Guys. I did it. Remember when I said a day or two before October started that I wanted to write an October novel? Like nanowrimo, but in October? I couldn’t help it, I was hit with the autumnal, October feels. I’m saying October a lot, aren’t I? Forgive me, I’m exhausted.

But I did it. Today, I finished the final chapter at almost 52k words. I can’t believe it. The whole thing feels like a fever dream, to be honest. It was only a month ago that I started this book, on the first of the month exactly, when I woke up feeling the love for the season and thought, “Oh gods, I actually need an idea for this novel first.”

Came up with one right on the spot, jotted it down in my writers group on discord, and they were all so supportive and lovely. When I started writing that same day, I never expected the words to flow out of me as easily as they did, I never expected to love the main character as much as I do, I never thought his voice would come to me as clearly as though I’d been writing him for years. I truly love, love, love him and I’m so happy to have seen his love story through.

This book is meant to be atmospheric above anything else, and despite the tiny amount of smut and the dark elements, I really hope that you guys someday can read this and just enjoy it as a cozy autumnal read. I created my first reel ever writing this final chapter here, and I’m so, so grateful to everyone who put up with me and my updates during the writing of this story.

As you can probably tell by now, the reason I haven’t been posting fics is because I’ve been working so hard on this book. If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t been sleeping or reading or watching movies with my best friend or doing much of anything since starting this, especially in this last week with alex manes appreciation week being at the same time. I won’t be able to come back right away to writing fics. I’d like to take these upcoming few days to rest and do some reading and just breathe. I do still have a lot of ideas for fics I’d love to share with you, prompt requests that are still sitting in my inbox, ideas I’ve had for the longest time and haven’t gotten around to writing because of this October novel, which I think I finally have a title for! I’m so excited.

I have two beta readers who have been wonderful enough to offer me their services once I’ve actually finished editing this book... which will hopefully be next Saturday. For now, I think I’ll just go think of Tyler Blackburn and smell my stay cosmic candle and rest. Thank you all for being so patient with me. See you soon, and happy halloween 👻🖤

[the-darklings]

coa one year later & self-reflection

(*drags out a creaky metal chair and plops down on it heavily*)

Hi. It’s me, ya boi skinny--

Wait, wrong one. Do over.

Hi, it’s me, Kat, and I’m not dead. Clearly. Today being one year anniversary of COA has kinda put me in a reflective mood, so I guess I decided to sit down and just...talk about some things, thoughts and feelings I’ve been bottling inside for a hot sec. Especially given how radio silent I have gone on here and people deserve a bit of perspective. 

And before anyone starts worrying, it’s all good, and I’m still around and currently in good health for the most part. 

So, let’s take it back to the start. Regardless of how dramatic it may sound, we need to go back a year for that. 

By technicality alone, COA actually turned one year old on October 12th. That’s when the first part was posted. However, the reason I’m treating today as the aforementioned birthday is simple: I had no intention of this story ever being more than a short two-parter. I told this to the discord gang already but COA was only going to have two parts. V was going to die in Tokyo and the rest of the story follows glimpses of John throughout the movies and it’s her ghost that haunts him. Skipping ahead, it was going to have a bittersweet ending of John eventually dying, having completed his task, only to be greeted by V, Daisy and Helen in the afterlife. A peace of sorts. Then, I realised that, well, no. I have more to say on this world and intrigue about this placeholder character V kept growing. 

November 1st happened and I made a very last minute call to continue COA but with the added pressure of doing it during NaNoWriMo 2019. And boy did I. Most of the story was figured out during that very intense month. I posted Part 2 on this day a year ago because I was so eager to share it. Perhaps, in retrospect, a bit too eager. 

For those of you who may not know this, I work as a writer full time for my actual every day job. I’m the main writer for an original webcomic called In the Bleak Midwinter on Webtoon.com and have been for almost two years now. Getting what is essentially your dream job is amazing. I’m very lucky on that front but it also taught me stark realities of having your job and only hobby overlap. It’s a dangerous creative mix. Especially because I was not used to being constraint in what I create or the feeling like I have to please anyone else. Writing as a job is a whole other avenue of creative exhaustion. I love my job a lot and am very, very lucky to have it but it doesn’t change the fact that those initial stages made me fall back on COA a lot for creative freedom that I craved so desperately. To an unhealthy degree looking back on it now. 

But going back to November last year. NaNo time. I did it. Finished on the 24/25th I believe. A juicy final count of 52k+. All while maintaining a weekly update schedule for a fic that usually hit around 10k per update, if not more, even during those early days. Add writing an original story on top of that. Writing every day for hours on end (we are talking 10-12hr days) without any time for other hobbies or time for myself in general. I kept pushing and pushing and pushing. Losing weight and sleep in the process. I think the thing that convinced me that I should continue doing so is the fact that the outpour of support for COA ended up surpassing anything I ever expected or even dared to hope for. I’m not a huge numbers person but the outpour of love and just sheer investment in the story and characters blew me away. John Wick fandom is on the smaller side and has been going through downtime when I posted COA so my expectations were...well, small tbh. I like keeping expectations low to avoid any disappointments in general. But I’ve also always had an issue of being a massive 0 or 100 kind of person. If I love something, it consumes me. In this case, it brought me as much joy and freedom as much as it was steadily pushing me towards the ultimate crash. 

That being said, I can’t thank you all enough for every comment, like, reblog and message and fanart. You’re the reason I got this far. With your support. It brightened some really dark days for me.

But. 

To be frank, it’s never been about you guys. I never wrote or pushed because I felt like I had to appease anyone. That creative mindset is pure poison and I long since learned to let go of it. I kept pushing and kept working myself to the bone because I liked it. I liked how reading peoples’ responses made me feel. I liked the addictive nature of reading all the comments and theories after an update. I loved the idea of brightening peoples’ days and giving them something to cheer them up after what might have been a shitty day. Even if that was at expense of my own time/well being. But for a long time, it wasn’t. I love writing a lot but facts remain facts. 

It was beyond unhealthy and burnout wasn’t a question of if but when and that when was approaching at neck-breaking speed. 

So we come to the end of November. Part 4 has just come out. People were invested and I was invested alongside them. I was just finishing up Part 5 which (back then) was the biggest single chapter I’ve ever written and god I still recall my sheer dread because that was the beginning of Santino being established as a LI. Looking back on that now, it’s downright hilarious how worried I was about the reception of him and V together after John.

So honestly, I hit burnout at around Part 8. Because that’s the first time I recall struggling with writing a chapter. Part 8 came out on December 28th. I had a brief break for holidays. But my mistake was not taking longer back then. Because I continued writing with a barely healed burnout. Followed by almost a year of struggling and continuously creating through that state. It wasn’t like I eased off the pressure, either. Oh, no. The chapters grew in size, the world and the characters with it. AUs amassed quickly and while I adore every single one - again, I didn’t know how to pace myself well enough.

I’m spiteful though. The more the chapters struggled the more I pushed against the burnout. By the time Chicago arrived, however, I knew I was in trouble. I ended up writing 43k+ in a span of 2 months, I believe. And while to some it may not seem like a lot given the time frame, it’s a lot when you’re burnout to a crisp & writing an original story for work + deadlines. Which I was burned out and then some. Chicago was something I was looking forward to writing for months. I have built it up since Part 4. It was a long time coming. So while I’m still proud of it, I would be lying if I said that some scenes were not sacrificed for the sake of keeping to my invisible schedule that no one but me actually cared about. You guys have always been patient. I never felt pushed into anything. It’s always only ever been me doing the harm. 

Chicago was the downwards spiral for me mentally. I felt like I was failing to live up to my own expectations. That people were drifting away from it. I was plagued by the thought that the story I poured so much into was falling apart and growing weaker. Which this has always been an issue with me: I am my own harshest critic. Always have been. In fact, I’m a downright mean little fucker when it comes to just tearing at myself. I know writing is for fun - and it is - but I still like the idea of being proud of my work which only made everything worse despite the love each update received. 

This takes us to the beginning of June. Specifically, June the 2nd. Or, as I like to call it: Kat Makes Another Impulsive Decision but This One Actually Works Out For the Better. On this day, I created the COA Discord server. And damn, I’m not sure what exactly I was expecting when I did ngl. I did it for fun and as an escape more so than anything. But somehow it ended up being the best decision I made in a long while. I know some of you are reading this. So love you lots, dorks. It’s such a privilege to be able to call so many of you my friends even outside of COA now. That little community has given me some of the best memories from this year and helped me to crawl out of my own metaphorical pit I was stuck in. Mentally, I’m doing much better than I did beginning of this summer. Which could be summed up as a constant self-hatred cycle and a feeling of inadequacy. 

That, however, does not mean my burnout magically disappeared. If anything Chapter 17 just put a nail in the coffin so to speak. 2020 has been a shitty year just across the board for obvious reasons I don’t need to go into here but that can only partially be attributed to my mental state. Chapter 17 was...exhaustive. To say the least. But I was determined to stick with my vision and not split it up. I was also starting to be a bit more forgiving towards myself in terms of how long I may take to write it thanks to guys on discord though the feeling of failure and worry never quite faded fully. I’m proud of Part 17. Truly. But that was also when I hit rock bottom creatively on COA. It drained me completely. 

I tried writing Part 18 for weeks after, day in and day out, not getting past the first scene and hating every word I wrote. So I took a deep breath and stopped. Figured I let it marinate and wait instead of trying to piece one of the most crucial chapters in this story like some Frankenstein monster two sentences at the time.

So my solution was simple: give myself some distance from it and write other things. Get my spark back. Of course that’s always a good idea. Having multiple creative escapes is the best thing you can do for yourself creatively. There was just one tiny little problem. 

I was still burned out. Still am. The problem went deeper than just being burned out over COA. I was burned out over writing itself. 

Which is an issue for a person who only has writing as a creative outlet.

I don’t have any other way to express myself. So I was stuck in a runt, trying to write because it’s the only thing that makes me genuinely happy even when I really shouldn’t have. And let me tell you. It’s a shitty fucking feeling. My burnout worsened. I had a thousand ideas but every time I tried to get them down it felt forced, fragmented, and weak. Repetitive and dry. Now, this is also in part because English isn’t my native language, so my vocab is limited as a result, but I hit that sweet rock bottom in that regard, too. 

So, I worked on V (but in her OC form Clara), Lucien and The Elites. All those characters have grown so much since you last read about them. I have multiple original projects planned down the line that will feature all of them existing in their own world, with their own stories and no longer constrained by JW canon.  

Which, finally, takes us to the end of October and beginning of November 2020. 

I was convinced that the best course of action was to do NaNo again but with an original story this time (involving V). Suffice to say, it took a grand total of maybe 5-6 days and hating every second of writing it while also feeling like this project I’m so passionate and excited to write (still am) is just...going down the toilet to be blunt, to realise I may have made the wrong call. 

Still, the stubborn ass that I am, I pushed through. Convinced I can get into it if I just keep going. The realizations that I am sharing with you right now won’t have been possible if it hadn’t been for a rather curious turn of events about a week and a half ago.

I recently bought a gaming laptop, all in preparation for Cyberpunk 2077 dropping ofc. But, in the meantime, I kept recommending a game to a friend on the COA server. That game? Far Cry 5. (It’s a blast to play btw, just a side note.) And playing it brought back all the feelings of nostalgia from the days when I used to write for that fandom. So I revisited some old work. Checked the stuff I never published and that has been sitting ducks in my docs for months and hoo boy. Let me tell you it was a vibe check of the worst kind. 

The stark difference in the prose and the ease with which it flowed was...startling. It made me remember why I love writing so much and how proud I used to be of what I wrote back in the day. Which is not to say I’m not proud now, but it was just such a sharp dip in quality it was impossible to ignore.  

So I didn’t.  

I paused NaNo, moving it to another month. I paused writing for everything but work, which with our season coming to an end I will also get a rest from soon, too. I kinda paused in general. For the first time in a while, I finally forced myself to switch off. Rest. 

The reason why I haven’t been on here is simple: guilt and not having energy to be on here. I like making my blog a safe space for everyone. Similar to escape it has become for me. I couldn’t pretend I was fine when I wasn’t. I felt obliged to perform and being here became exhausting. I haven’t been checking my inbox. Haven’t done much of anything except occasionally dropping by and reblogging a random post so people know I’m alive.

And that’s that, folks. That’s where I am currently. Resting. Completely exhausted mentally but resting. Getting my energy back. 

So where does that leave us, huh? If you read this far, dunno what to tell you. Thanks, I suppose. It’s still odd to think people actually care about my existence sometimes.

I know what you’re likely thinking, too. So does this mean COA is never gonna be finished? What is gonna happen to it? Are you abandoning it?

The answer: no. 17 out of 25 chapters and 250k+ in, I’m too far in not to give it a proper conclusion. Not because I owe it to anyone other than myself. I want this story to be a stepping stone for my future as a writer. I want to prove to myself that I can get this done and finish it. As of right now (as you can no doubt tell with how long it’s been since last update) it’s on a soft hiatus while I rest. This rest? Not sure how long it may last. Right now, my plan is till mid December at which point I will reevaluate. Ideally, I finish the year with an update. But my New Year’s resolution is to finish COA. That timeline has become a little more murky now but, again, ideally it’s within the first quarter of 2021. Will that happen? I don’t know. And I don’t want to make false promises, either. 

All I’m saying is that it will be done. I’m just no longer sure how long, exactly, it may take me to reach that Epilogue. I don’t expect many people to stick around for however long it may take me, but if you do, thank you. Truly. I really and deeply mean that. 

So what’s on the cards for this blog in the meantime? Well, CP77 is coming out in under a month (if it doesn’t get moved again lmao rip) and I expect that to be my soft return to posting my writing on here again. We will see where the muse takes me, if at all. Regardless though, I’m excited. 

One doctorate thesis later, here we are at the end of this really long rambling session. I hope that this has given you some perspective on things going on behind the scenes. I spared you some of the gorier details but I think this post has been long overdue. I suppose I, myself, was just too unwilling to face these things despite knowing about them deep down for a while now. I’m too self-critical not to notice but acting on correcting this behavior has been a whole other matter clearly. 

Thank you for reading this post, my writing in general, and supporting me. I’m not going anywhere. I’m still around. More is on the way in the future. I’ll be seeing you all real soon. And all my love to all of you. 

Love,

- Kat.   

[thewordworrier]

November 2023 Writing Wrap Up

Words Written: 56,261 words. Hell yeah. Things I’ve worked on: Aside from two of the three things I posted this month, I also worked on: ~ Normal AU situations [lots of these] ~ other Taylor fic bits ~ something i've helpfully titled :P [I mean, I know what this is but you won't until I post it] ~ the Reverse Vampire AU ~ an AU with the wife ~ the refleshening ~ the tamarin situation Oh! Actually I did work on the 3rd published thing a little - I added a few paragraphs of an ending. Things Published: I'm honestly surprised that I managed to post anything this month. ~ A Shot In The Darkest Dark [My usual, new piece inspired by Taylor's new music kinda deal.] ~ If You Look In The Mirror And Don’t Like What You See [I'm not sure where this came from but hey, we ran with it.] ~ This Place Is Too Crowded - Too Many Cool Kids [Though I will admit I didn't write the majority of this one this month, I wrote it some time ago but decided that it would be fine as a stand alone.]

December Plans! ~ we are going back to the 500 words a day for my sanity. I love NaNoWriMo and I love the progress it helps me make, because I don't cheat - none of this, fully writing out contractions, or adding in extra words that I'll delete later, or whatever BS for me. But. My god is it tiring sometimes. I actually found this year's really hard. Which probably just means I need to plan a little better for next year, as I know I wasn't as prepared as I have been in the past.

~ maybe we can finish off the refleshing It's not too far off to be fair. I'm not sure how to end it. My outline didn't get that far.