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#ok here it is one of the only good posts im going to make in this tag cherish it before i return to shitty ones
extravagav · 27 days
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Yk I never did truly recover from the sick fic chapter
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strwbrymlkshake · 1 year
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Why can't I be satisfied with everything? It needs to be perfect to me and I can't accept anything otherwise :(
#mine#oh boy here we go. guy last post was about has been pretty cool and i got flustered around him a few times#but i feel bad bc. i need m o r e he isnt insane enough he isnt making me go absolutely crazy i want to be satisfied but im NOT im sorry#like its quite honestly the most attention acceptance etc ive gotten but its not ENOUGH he doesnt die whenever i send a selfie#im never satisfied WHY i have unrealistic expectations !!!! i hate my brain killing and violence and death etc#i get crushes on guys who want nothing to do with me but then when one actually wants me its not enough? what is wrong with me#thrill of the chase? i cant accept being loved? what is it brain. christ almighty. im not doing anything like deliberately yandere related#anymore im just being generally incomprehensibly mentally ill 🙄 still trying to find a therapist but idk how on earth ill explain that#ill update this post tomorrow with more insanity but for now i am the sleepy tired#// ok its now 3 days later i dont feel like making another post. i think i was just having a mental illness moment as always#because he does make me insane. hashtag girl. im trying to be the smartest and calculated i have ever been with a relationship in my life#like im thinkin about it so hard bro. the future n shit. how would this relationship go. im so scared ill do something wrong its preventing#me from doing things RIGHT. im sad becaude i flipped out today over even imagining him being upset with me a little#so i was really embarrassed and it put me in a weird mood for the rest of the night but he reassured me he doesnt hate me or want me to die#every one aaalways says theyre different. i can only hope this one is telling the truth. i dont know what ill do if he isnt.#well i need to stop whining about fictional scenarios and focus on the good stuff in reality. i get along with him very well and he#is very niceys to me :3 he doesnt think im fucking insane or stupid for overreacting. i feel very comfortable gossiping and talking w him#every long time blog viewer of mine reading this like ah shit here we go again#but thats what im here for. i guess. just have to keep doing this shit until something good finally happens to me romantically hngh#i feel so strange because i have wanted and yearned for a relationship but now that i actually could have one im like WAIT#I DIDNT THINK ID GET THIS FAR 💀💀💀 bruh. and he doesnt even think im stupid hes respectful to me he checks in on me all the time#like perhaps the only person to ever actually almost match my energy in a romantic sense. there was [redacted] i guess but he didnt love me#he listens to me talk about my problems he doesnt think i complain or overreact too much. all the ridiculous cringe shit i do#he doesnt mind it. its nice to be able to be myself. and im really proud of myself for not rushing into a relationship right away
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arthur-r · 8 months
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falling asleep worked i did it for three hours. now what i’m still tired i just also wasted the day and looked stupid to my roommate….
#like im glad i slept but also. same problems as before#although my french teacher emailed me back said i should go to office hours. which is a proper response to my email#wikipedia guy texted me back with details like an hour after i texted but also like two or three hours ago#gonna settle the score by bringing a $20 bill tomorrow then i won’t feel so weird and guilty#but no i feel so fucking stupid and gross for like. i was crying so close to my roommate so i had to fall asleep#or else i’d be standing up with tears in my eyes next to my roommate which is worse#but i just. i dont know. like he thinks i’m just lazy. i’m always asleep i never tell him why#i dont know. good morning i hope everyone is doing well#there are two people i usually get dinner with and one is out of town and the other i think his parents are here and also things are weird#translation things aren’t weird i’m just weird and feel guilty for being such a weird person#anyway i just. college?? what am i doing here????#i talked to my mom this morning she says that she felt the same way during college and that she should have dropped out way earlier#which. not helpful?? what do i do after i drop out?? i am someone who can’t hold a normal part time job and my only HOPE is ending up being#i mean anything really just something that requires a lot of prior experience!!#and the college is paying me really good to go to school but only if i stay full time#so i cant just lower my course load because that will actually make everything worse instead of better#idk. going to french teachers office hours tomorrow and will figure out time for linguistics teacher too and will get my LIS grade back up#(that one is just simple that one is i missed two discussion posts but there are ten more to come and also tests and stuff. i’ll be ok)#idk. and i still want to go to my LIS teachers office hours and ask how he became professor of rare books print culture and information bias#that is a good set of things to be a scholar for. and he’s curating collections at the same time as being my teacher#so idk. professors don’t seem as stupid and uppity as they used to. and i think i want to do that someday#plus with the salary jump from librarian i can feasibly become a major donor to local libraries to keep that influence around shdhdf#(although. if i get paid by the school (!!) to get a phd in print culture who says i don’t become a fancy librarian with that??)#i dont know. this is so stupid because i get so excited about the prospects and then i go back to the present and i’m flunking out of school#my grades haven’t been this bad since the height of COVID i thought something about me had gotten better but apparently not#like literally who went and made me traumatized?? why did you have to do that?? now i can’t be a normal person?? shut up!!!!#idk. just feel like if i weren’t having panic attacks about the fact that people are safe and kind here (and therefore must be hiding their#true intentions and taking advantage of me) then maybe i would have remembered to take my french test#idk. i’m tired and want to go home. sorry for venting all day i hope everyone is doing okay#vent cw
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0tul1ss · 11 months
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#mannn i literally assumed he ghosted-- why on earth would he text me after so long????#i was fully like 'ok the last msg i sent literally makes me cringe a bit to read but its been months so ig im never opening the convo again#it was simpler before when there felt like there was nothing else to do and easier to move on. i even had a little crush on someone else !#now i have a whole wheel of decisions to choose from#and idek what i truly want from this guy anymore bc even just platonically he kinda fucked it up like. idk#or rather i want a lot of different things and idk what to choose#i want my friend back. i want to never see him again. i want him to know every truth of what ive felt and i want him to know none of it#i want him to miss me or maybe wonder about me sometimes down the line. i want him to not spare me another thought for the rest of his life#i want to reply only 'go fuck yourself' and i want to write him a letter and i want to ghost him better than he ghosted me#i want to tell him i love him and i want to tell him i hate him and i want to say nothing at all#i want the closure i was denied. i want to protect the closure i now have#<-going insane#anyway its soooo stupid like i already grieved for this shit bro. i accepted the end of this years long close friendship#anyway idk why im doing so much processing of this in a vent post nor do i know why i always feel compelled to post these when i do#good thing i keep a small presence on here lol. but yea uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh send post#ok wait i saved this as a draft and went to go look for what i had been tagging vent posts with#[couldnt find one i had been using consistently even tho the whole point is so ppl can blacklist it if they want whoops!!]#and i saw another vent from another time he just kinda disappeared on me#and while this time was a lot worse for a lot of reasons i think its important to say this--#that the last thing that i want is to go back to square one of this stupid awful cycle#vent
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lazaruspiss · 1 year
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any horny hal jordan comics to recommend me?
GOD I WISH. unfortunately i am a "rotate my blorbo in the microwave of my minds eye" kind of guygal u know. Yes im a dc fan. No i dont read. We exist. (My reading list is a nightmare. It's an entire spreadsheet.) I wanna read hal's spectre arc bc it seems like its got weird gender and ghost stuff goin on which is soooo 💕💕💕
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actualtoad · 2 years
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ok but i think white people could give their songs about culture a rest
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jackalhadrurusluvr · 15 days
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i did lots of laundry today and i am changing my sheets and i would like a little bit of gentleness from the universe
#like ok goddamn. ig ill send in a job application or a few. WHAT DO U WANT FROM ME!!!!!!!!#what they dont tell you is the post-friends-hangout-depression is much worse when you see them like thrice a year#before i wouldve had close friends to spend my time with.... but alas. but im still here and breathing nonetheless so i need the world to#take it easy on me#in my pursuit of opening a can of olives the can opener pinched me hard as hell#and i was only getting olives because my coffee machine decided it doesnt know how to heat water anymore#and i was gonna have tea because i couldnt think of anything else to have and just wanted something sweet#i also cleaned the litterbox and basically i actively existed today#doesnt a man deserve a little treat for that#i even got up at noon#and my dads gf :pensive: is still here#auuuauuauauauauurrghhghhhhghhhgh#its kind of funny that my dad expects me to be bffs with her like dawg even with our closest relatives i am extremely awkward and uncomfy#like ive grown to love my aunt! i still would really rather not be around her for the regular 2 hours of visiting time!#i will not speak to her directly! i will speak very very minimally and it will not be to her. and its been this way all my life#extreme introvert in a family of extreme extroverts moment#anyways. the pain in my body from Going Out is also very very intense#im not much of a headaches man and they really trigger my hypochondria#so having one for the past few days has not been optimal. been doing a lot of laying down#they dont know it is messed up that i get the post-hangout sadness and post-hangout pain that takes me out for days#my friends are moving on in their lives and making progress and looking towards the future :(#i am so happy for them. but also what the hell am i doing#i have to pee. i really dont wanna get up. uuurgrghrgrhh.. i ate all my olives. they were good#20yrs on this hell of an earth with absolutely no purpose nor direction but at least there is black olives
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maplesyrupsainz · 5 months
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙rosé flowing l LN4˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: lando norris x nepo baby!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au
warnings: a lot of fluff as always with me!! tiniest innuendo at the end lol but literally not srs !
summary: in which the grid's nepo baby bff tries to keep her new relationship on the low but is sabotaged by her friends
a/n: idk if this is good i kind of dnt like it?? let me know hahahhhh😭😭 i feel like it's too diff to my other nepo baby one
request!!!: If you're up for it then maybe a lando version of the nepo baby fic instead of lance (*HERE*)
fc: shira.klein
my masterlist
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by yourbff, lilymhe, and 512,097 others
yourusername night life 🪩..
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yourbff hot hot hot
yourusername no u😘
user1 is that lando norris??
user2 yessssss the f1 drivers luv y/n
user3 who is she ??
user4 random rich nepo girl lol
user5 so pretty
maxverstappen1 im in your area
yourusername no way. let's go to dinner!!!!
maxverstappen1 👍
user6 rizz
landonorris 😘
user7 no response...
user8 he's not beating the norizz allegations anytime soon i fear ...
landonorris posted a story
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liked by oscarpiastri, danielricciardo, and 282,023 others
user9 ??? who is she
user10 DATE night? first im hearing of this
user11 lando i cant cope with a soft launch rn
oscarpiastri 👀
landonorris 🤫
user12 lando u have RIZZ???? surely not
yourbff 💋💋
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by kellypiquet, maxverstappen1, and 771,684 others
yourusername 🍷
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yourbff awww look at lil merlot 🐱
yourusername mr merlot said he wants a visit soon
yourbff of course anything for the baby
user18 the cat being named after a wine 😭
user19 MAX!?
user20 max verstappen superb rizz
user21 they're not dating guys kelly is in the likes
user22 booo
maxverstappen1 it was so good to see you!
yourusername 💘 always a pleasureee
kellypiquet pretty girl💋💋
yourusername love you sweet
pierregasly you're making the rounds y/n?
yourusername gotta make a point of seeing all my fav boys of courseee🏎️
yourusername posted a story
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liked by pierregasly, yourbff, and 221,732 others
yourbff im gonna get so drunk
landonorris 😘
user23 drunk y/n incominggg
maxverstappen1 dont do anything i wouldn't do
user24 WYDDD Y/N
yourbff
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liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 399,183 others
yourbff my best friend and her man are hot
tagged: yourusername, landonorris
view all 4,820 comments
user25 BEST FRIEND AND HER MAN???
user26 Y/N AND LANDO???
user27 is this y/n & lando dating confirmation
user28 omg it's happening guys
user29 how did lando norizz pull y/n y/l/n???!!!!
landonorris someone's in troubleeee
yourbff who? it aint me surely
landonorris 🤨
yourusername 😭 ur lucky tht i love u
yourbff aww i know im soo lucky i love you sooo much you're the prettiest girl in the world!
yourusername 🤡🤡
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, charles_leclerc, and 301,832 others
user34 omg hi pierre
user35 OMGG y/n & pierre reunion
user36 fav friendshippp
charles_leclerc hanging out without me i see okay okay
yourusername YOU SAID YOU WERE BUSY
charles_leclerc yea but 🥺
user37 charles is crying rn
pierregasly
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liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, and 829,174 others
pierregasly life the past few weeks
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user38 omg is that y/n and her cat
user39 Y/N AND MERLOT
user40 are they dating ??
yourusername sending hugs from me & mr merlot 🐱
pierregasly i only want the ones from merlot
yourusername wow ok. i see
user41 wherever y/n is a full glass of wine follows
liked by yourusername
user42 waittt i kind of ship them
user43 imagine if they were dating 🥺
user44 some of these comments are so ick can a male & female not be friends anymore 💀
landonorris get u a man who looks at u like pierre looks at that ice cream
liked by pierregasly, yourusername, danielricciardo, charles_leclerc
yourbff posted a story
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liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 96,914 others
yourusername STOP
user45 is that y/n
user46 is that y/n
user47 i swear that's y/n
yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 712,384 others
yourusername been a minute 🍓
view all 8,183 comments
user48 HII Y/N
user49 LANDO AND CHARLESSS?!!!!
user50 she prob didnt make a grid post for a bit coz u guys harass her on who she's dating now 💀
charles_leclerc omg it's me
yourusername yup hi charlie 👋
landonorris wow i look sexy ngl
yourusername 🤨
user51 i wish i was y/n
user52 ikr she's so perfect
lilymhe hello my favourite nepo baby
yourusername I MISS YOU!!
lilymhe i miss you moree
landonorris posted a story
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liked by danielricciardo, yourusername, and 593,173 others
danielricciardo medium launch ?
landonorris 😝
user53 lando is it y/n or not plz tell us
user54 major y/n vibes
yourbff she's majestic how the hell did you manage this
landonorris i honestly got no idea im just here for the ride or whatever i guess
yourbff respect it. at least you're aware she's out of your league
landonorris oh absolutely i am
lilymhe i want her
landonorris back off
danielricciardo
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liked by yourbff, charles_leclerc, and 873,013 others
danielricciardo beach day!! 🏖️
view all 14,238 comments
user55 omg
user56 that's literally lando & y/n
yourbff you've rly done it this time
danielricciardo dont know what you're talking about 😇
yourusername you're done
landonorris 😭
danielricciardo i wont be taking questions at this time
yourbff convenient
user57 oh they are definitely dating right ??
charles_leclerc 🤨
liked by yourbff
user58 wait is everyone trying to expose them for dating fr
yourusername posted a story
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liked by danielricciardo, pierregasly, and 314,873 others
danielricciardo HAHAHA
danielricciardo this is basically a confirmation
yourusername i'll never trust you with a secret again
danielricciardo was worth it
user59 Y/N AND LANDO HAS TO BE REAL AFTER THIS
user60 suspicions confirmed
yourbff let the world know y/n!!
yourusername EASY FOR YOU TO SAY
landonorris 😘
lando.jpg
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liked by daniel3.jpg, yourbff, and 365,927 others
lando.jpg 💛
tagged: yourusername
view all 8,173 comments
yourusername you are so obsessed with me
lando.jpg yes 🙌
user61 OMG 😨
user62 they're in love. fr
user63 that first pic omg
daniel3.jpg now do it again on main
lando.jpg all in good time 😃
user64 hardest launch of the century
user65 she's insanely gorgeous
yourbff freaking finally
yourusername 🤫
yourbff me & daniel take credit for this
danielricciardo 👍
landonorris you guys should focus on your own lives
landonorris posted a story
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, and 293,284 others
danielricciardo 👏👏👏
charles_leclerc 🥳🥳🥳
yourbff 🎉🎉🎉
pierregasly 🍾🍾🍾
maxverstappen1 🎊🎊🎊
user66 it's real
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, danielricciardo, and 728,023 others
yourusername i wanna be defined by the things that i love
tagged: landonorris
view all 9,185 comments
user72 omg this is so much to take in
user73 her feet on him 🥹
user74 THIS IS SO CUTE I CANT HANDLE IT
user75 new fav wag for sure
danielricciardo look at my children go
yourusername we're grown up !
danielricciardo no more sneaking around 🫶
pierregasly cracking open a bottle as we speak
yourusername celebrating the only way i know how 🎉
landonorris you know other ways y/n 👀.
pierregasly WTF???
yourusername 🤨
landonorris i love You
yourusername i love you !!!
yourbff 🥹🥹🥹
THE END 🧡
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seattlesellie · 1 year
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this is a request by: @sadeyedsugar !! i posted but deleted bc i wasn’t satisfied w it so i re-wrote it <333
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warnings: smut, dom!abby, sub!reader, size kink, abbys kind of a perv, reader is described as small but it only means smaller than abby in height n weaker than her <3 not proofread!
authors note: why the fuck do i constantly find myself writing about the wlf gym. its like i live there.
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you and abby started dating exactly 3 weeks ago. 3 weeks ago, abby decided to finally ask you out. she was practically pining over you since the moment she met you. your innocent smiles made her heart melt, and every time she saw you look at her it made her physically ache. she couldnt handle it anymore, which is how she found herself banging on your bedroom door at 11pm with a random bouquet of flowers to ask if maybe, possibly, youd agree to go out with her.
since that day, you practically followed abby around everywhere. this is exactly why you found yourself here, in the wlf gym, watching your now girlfriend, lifting an impossibly heavy amount of weights. for some reason, every harsh groan, every moan that escaped her throat, made your heart beat faster. abby and you kissed, sure.
shed kissed you on your second date, while you were cuddled up in her bed after watching a movie, facing her. you were having a conversation about her past. shed told you all about her father, about the void it left in her. your genuine intrigue killed her, made her heart so soft for you. she pushed a hair strand away from you face, and just asked; “can i… kiss you?” that question made you flush so hard you could feel the heat burning in your ears. all you could respond with was a small “mmhm”, and next thing, her sweet mouth was on yours. it was sweet, and warm, like a butterfly landing on your lips. so tender and so innocent, until it wasnt. without even being aware of it, you brought your hand to lightly tug at abbys shirt. just a small tug. that tug, resulted in abby letting out a shaky breath, deepening the kiss for just a moment and then abruptly stopping. you slowly opened your eyes, and noticed how her pupils were dilated, her strong chest rising up and down. “whyd you stop?” you asked in your sweet voice, the voice that made abby’s heart flutter and fist tighten.
“because…” she responded, followed by a deep sigh. “lets just sleep, ok?” she commanded, and you did.
from then on, that was your routine. slow, innocent sweet kiss on the bridge of turning into something more, and abby shutting it off. you didnt understand why. what was she so afraid of? it was just kissing, wasnt it? sure, sometimes youd push your chest into hers, making her breathing get heavier, but that was it, right? what would be so bad about a little kiss turning into a longer one? its not like youd hurt her, not like shed hurt you, right?
“good job, abs” you cheered at your girlfriend, watching her lift.
“mmph- thanks” she breathed deeply, flashing you a triumphant smile.
“how heavy is it?” you asked, curiously examining the weights.
“why? wanna try?” she responded, satisfied with herself, obviously giddy about impressing her girlfriend.
you hesitantly walked over to face the giant weight, examining it with a panicked look that made abby huff a giggle.
you slowly bent down, put your delicate hands on the weight, and tried lifting it up. the thing is, it didnt even move. not even a flinch. “mhhhhp” you groaned, with furrowed brows. how the fuck did she manage to do that? abby was eyeing you up and down, hands crossed over her chest with a cocky smile on her face, as she watched your failed attempts. “let me help you, okay?” she commanded, and you nodded while wiping a small drop of sweat from your forehead. abby stood behind you, her light breaths caressing your neck. “that is not how you dress for the gym, by the way” she snickered. “whats wrong with how im dressed?” you were wearing a jean skirt, and a bright pink sports bra. is that not gym attire? its a sports bra, you thought.
“c’mon” she sighed, “hands on the weight” she demanded. you quickly bent down again, and abby followed you, bending down with you, putting her hands above yours, wrapping them completely up. having your hands practically fully covered by hers, sent a shiver down her spine. fuck, would that be how youd look like with her above you, deep inside, big hands holding onto yours, forcing them onto the bed? would you squeeze your hand into hers while begging her for more? focus, abby, she thought to herself. shes not ready, not yet. youd ruin her.
with the strength of abbys arms, she lifted up the weight, your hands wrapped around it. you thought the weight lifting distribution was about 20%/80%. you were wrong. it was probably around 1%/99%.
“oh my god!” you giggled with excitement. “look at me!” abby laughed in your ear “thats my strong girl” she said proudly, grunting into you, making you squeal.
her strong girl. those words made you tingle and your stomach feel like its getting swarmed by actual butterflies.
“now, bend over again slowly for me okay?” she said in your ear. you slowly pulled the weights down, following her instructions. “thats it, good girl” she said gently, her voice so soft and assuring. what if she saw your breath hitch? what if she noticed how your pupils grow every time she mutters those words? what if she’d know, exactly what she was doing to you. “you good?” she asked, making you snap out of your trance.
“yeah!” you assured her. “totally fine”. “okay…” she snickered, and got back to lifting yet another weight. you shifted from one leg to the other while watching her, leaving her to lock her gaze onto you. “think im gonna do some yoga” you exclaimed.
“you do yoga?” she smirked slightly, sharp short breaths escaping her mouth as she lifts the weight up and down, up and down.
“nope” you responded, popping the p. “but i can try, right? i mean- maybe id get as strong as you?” those words made her smile, and respond “wouldnt want to hurt yourself though, yeah? go easy” in her commanding voice. if abby told you to jump off of a roof, you probably would. especially when she talked to you like that. like you were her delicate little thing.
you grabbed the beat down yoga mat from a pile of gym equipment, and laid it gently on the floor. the mat was hot pink, complimenting your bra, making it almost seem as if you matched with it on purpose. as abby lifted her weights, she couldnt stop examining you. looking at you. noticing how your short skirt hiked up slightly as you bent down, how your white underwear teased her just a little, “look at what you want abby- never gonna get it” she felt as if your body was talking to her, mocking her. every curve of your figure inviting her in, and her brain, pushing her away. she wanted to give in - wanted to give in so bad. but you were so sweet, so kind. she was terrified of what shed do to you if she snapped. terrified of the bruises shed leave, the marks shed burn into you. what if you couldn’t handle it? what if she was too rough? what if she just couldnt go slow with you? she wanted to break you, wanted to keep you whole, wanted to make you scream and cry and pant and beg, and then she wanted you to tell her you loved her, that shes your everything, that youre hers. what if once she touched you, corrupted you, youd hate her? she couldnt handle that.
her body was sweating, and it wasnt the weights that made her react way. it wasnt the rushes of endorphins running through her veins, it was you.
she was full on gawking now, like a fucking pervert. her weights were dropped a long ago, as soon as she noticed your body bending down in front of her, hitting the ground with a thud. “fuck” she mumbled to herself. her jaw was hanging open slightly, hands curled in fists, heart pumping in and out of her chest.
you spread your legs open, following the instructions of an sports old magazine you had found laying around outside the base one day. you were whimpering, desperately trying to put your legs in the right place, hands were they supposed to. were you meant to curl your head this way? shit- was your left leg supposed to be entangled with the right one or were you completely off - looking like a disheveled barbie doll.
“ughhh” you let out a sigh of frustration. “cant get it right!” you scoffed, and shoved the magazine away.
abby was gone. did you speak? she had no idea. all she could think of was the way your thigh jiggled and how your chest heaved up and down, nipples perked up through the beat down old sports bra.
“abby” you moaned, “abby help” you sighed and begged.
“abs!”
she snapped, quickly adverting her gaze away to look at the wall. if you werent so distracted, she thought maybe you would have called her a perv, you would have been disgusted by how her eyes didnt meet yours even once - gaze just glued on to your body.
“yeah?” she responded, wiping her sweat from her hand on her top.
“need help” you drawled.
she walked towards you hesitantly. do i get close? she though. what would happen then?
“look at this” you badgered, picking up the magazine, pointing at a picture of a lady with her head underneath her leg.
“how the hell am i supposed to do that?” you questioned, looking at abbys puzzled face.
you bent down to a form a triangle shape, abby by your side.
“can you stand behind me?” you begged.
her eyebrows raised slightly, questioning you.
she walked slowly, and stood directly behind you. it was killing her. she clenched her fist, short nails scratching her palms, leaving sharp marks.
“how am i supposed to put my arm over there?” you said, and accidentally backed up against abby, your ass slightly bumping her crotch. abbys breath hitched.
“j- just…”
her face was hot. she felt like she couldnt breathe, couldnt even swallow properly, all choked up.
she couldnt control herself anymore. it was like something overcame her, possessed her. she firmly put her hands on your waist, and jerked your body to slam her crotch, for just a second. she wanted to feel you, just like that, just for a monent. god, she needed that release so so bad. she was so good with you, so strict, stern. she managed herself. she was nice, respectful, she tried not to stare if your top was cut too low. always kept her composure, even when you whined her name in a way that made her see the devil, even when you were sleeping, and the urge to pull your pants down, for just a second, just a little bit, was so strong it made her hands grow clammy, she didnt. she was good. until she wasnt.
“abby? what are you doing?” you asked, feeling your own heartbeat speeding up.
“just… stay like that… yeah?” she panted, pulled and pushed your waist to make your ass meet her crotch deeper, harder this time.
“abs…” you gaped. you were in shock - what was she doing? why did your heart beat faster and why did your cunt start tickling? you let out a shaky breath, one that abby heard. one that signaled to her that this time - there was no controlling. not anymore.
“oh god…” she murmured, massaging your ass slowly while bumping her crotch into it.
“you know what you fucking do to me?” she grunted, her voice an octave higher than her usual, desparate. did you even know?
the scene was borderline obscene - you on your knees with your head hanging from your neck like a rag doll, abby behind you with her crotch buried in your cheeks, begging to be swallowed.
“abs- it feels- ah” you moaned. you couldnt control your body anymore, which is why you dropped quickly down to your knees, collapsing on the mat.
abby followed quickly, laying on top of you, crushing you with her weight, practically covering you whole.
she was panting over you, grinding down on your ass, begging herself for mercy.
“didnt fucking wanna do it like this” she whimpered between short breaths.
“fucking wanted to take it fucking slow with you” she grunts, when she feels you slightly arch your back for her. did you want this as much as her? is she fucking stupid?
“abby-“ you squealed, moans muffled by the mattress on the floor.
she grinded herself more harshly now, almost entirely losing herself on top of you.
“feels-“ you whimpered against the floor.
“tell me” she demanded.
“feels g- feels good, a a abby” the way her crotch was grinding into you made your clit bump into the mat, separated only by the thin material of your panties, skirt hitched up burning your stomach.
“fuuuck” she muttered, feeling herself clench at your words. she couldnt believe this was happening. the amount of times she pictured you like this, pictured you a panting mess, your pussy glistening- begging for her strap, her fingers, her tongue. she would lay awake at night with her fingers buried deep inside, fists clenched, just imagining you bouncing up and down screaming her name. after shed come, shed curse herself for it. punish herself for being so fucking unhinged.
“abby- need to see you” you cried out from beneath her. she softened for a second, breaking out of her grunts.
she lifted herself off, and carefully backed away, positioning herself to sit, hands supporting her from behind. as soon as she saw your face, your glistening eyes, the realization hit her. she was about to fuck you like an animal on the floor - you, her girlfriend, her sweet, innocent girlfriend. the same one she brought those flowers for, same one shed kill for, she was gonna ruin you.
“oh shit” she breathed, and her eyes became frantic, almost begging you for forgiveness with just her look. she couldnt hurt you.
you tried steadying your breaths, eyes glued on to the floor. you felt ashamed. ashamed of how much you liked it, ashamed of the wet spot that formed on your panties.
“im so fucking sorry” she pleaded, quickly placing her hand on your cheek, barely even grazing it, barely caressing, almost afraid to touch you again.
“for what?” you questioned, holding her palm. why was she the one apologizing to you?
“i couldnt control myself” she retreated, placing her forehead on yours.
“dont” you simply stated.
“dont control yourself”
as it it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“what?” she scoffed. she looked baffled. what were you saying? was she hallucinating?
“im saying you dont have to… im saying- i want to.” you couldnt quite put it in a sentence, a normal, coherent one. but you knew, you absolutely knew you needed to feel it again. needed her closer, needed her inside.
“c’mere” she almost moaned, and your body was hers.
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myysaints · 11 months
Text
°˖ ⊹ ꒰ LN4 ꒱ JUST MY LUCK ─ LANDO NORRIS
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LANDO NORRIS x f!reader
⌗︙・ summary — in which lando starts flirting with a (not-so-)random girl on the internet.
genre — social media au, fc hannah kae
notes — kinda disappointing finish to yesterday's gp :( but to make up for that here's something simple & cute !!! churned this one out in one day bc by god i love that little frog man with my whole heart. tbh this is just a shameless self insert ..... also rewrote history a tad bit by making lando finish on the podium at monaco because why not LOL hope u enjoyyyy xx
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lando.jpg  Monaco, I’m ready for ya.
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bambiyn  and i’m ready for u !!!!!!!
bambiyn  talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular…
bambiyn  why am i sweating rn
bambiyn  goddamn
bambiyn  my fav driver everyone !!!!!!
bambiyn  my dms (and legs) r open btw 😁😁
       Liked by lando.jpg yourbestfriend  Y/N OH MY GOD…. THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THIS APP… bambiyn  …ok… and? user  yo wtf lando liked????
danielricciardo  Lando I love you but not as much as that girl in the comments
bambiyn  ok i feel called out danielricciardo  Oh, hey there! bambiyn HIIII!!!!!
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bambiyn  yeah ok so monaco’s kinda cool
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user  marry me
user  didn’t know angels existed until i saw you 😩
user  mother is in monaco!!!!
yourbestfriend  “kinda cool” … says the girl who freaked out literally every 5 steps we took because “oh my god look at that car”
bambiyn  the cars here are sick okay idk what u want from me !
landonorris  only kinda?
bambiyn  maybe if u finish on the podium on sunday… then it’d be cooler user  LMFAOOOOO y/n never misses
landonorris  But welcome to Monaco 🙃
bambiyn  thank uuuuu!!! user  girlie hit him with the five u’s GET UP Y/N
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f1wagupdates
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f1wagupdates  Submitted by Anon ❤️ Looks like things are heating up in Monaco for Lando Norris! He was spotted last night on a dinner date with a mystery woman. A source close to the McLaren driver tells us that he is “very very content” in his new relationship, and is “excited to take on this weekend with her by his side”. As for who Lando’s secret lover is, we have it on good authority that, though she is a public figure, she is nowhere near her beau’s status of fame. Follow for more updates on all things wag-related 🏎
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user  arms…. hand placement…. RAHGRFGAHFRH
user  god i wish that were me 😩
user  someone check up on bambiyn… ik shes heartbroken rn
bambiyn  my world is literally collapsing as i type this
bambiyn  damn 💔
bambiyn  so that’s how it be then 😭😭
yourbestfriend  heartbreak. betrayal.
bambiyn  like damn i really thought i was the one 😔 user  LMFAOOO girl ur hilarious
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www.youtube.com/Formula1
POST-RACE INTERVIEW WITH LANDO NORRIS | MONACO GRAND PRIX 2023
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bambiyn
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🏷  landonorris, lando.jpg
bambiyn  thanks people magazine for finally letting me post my man. happy 5 months to my prince charming!! ♡ ૮꒰•༝  •。꒱ა xx
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landonorris  Best 5 months of my life
landonorris  You make my heart hurt silly
landonorris  my forever girl
danielricciardo  You’re too good for him Y/N!!!
bambiyn  ikr… user  get off your high horse smh youre nothing special he’ll dump u in a week landonorris  Yk I can read your comments right? Don’t be a fucking prick in my girl’s comment section. user  “my girl’s comment section” im gonna go feral
user  hey god it’s me again…
georgerussell63   Great meeting you Y/N! You two make a great couple 👍
landonorris  Mate what is with you and typing like youre 50 years old
landonorris
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🏷  bambiyn
landonorris   5 marvellous months with the missus ❤️ To my sweetheart, I love you dummy. I love you and your weird little keyboard face things. i love the little hop you do whenever you see something you like. The way you always smell like cotton candy and clouds and vanilla and cookies. How you laugh at all my jokes even when theyre kinda shit. The fact you still don’t know how to drive stick shift (drives me crazy but anyways). Thank you for being mine baby, here’s to a million more 5 months with you 🥂
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danielricciardo   aww thanks babe
landonorris  💀💀 danielricciardo  But on a serious note, I’m so happy for you guys. You got a good thing going bro 👊 landonorris  Sure do mate
bambiyn  a million kisses for u when u get home (´꒳`)♡
landonorris  eagerly looking forward landonorris  (❤ω❤) landonorris  Did i do it right bambiyn  YESSSS !!!! proud of u baby hehe ur so cute landonorris  >:)
user  we still don’t know what that crazy night was abt lol
bambiyn  omg yeah thank u for reminding me !
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BONUS:
You have [1] unread message.
[4:21 PM] vroom vroom baby: I saw your recent insta story.... 😉😉
[4:22 PM] dummy ❤️: mmhmmmmm
[4:22 PM] dummy ❤️: and what about it…?
[4:24 PM] vroom vroom baby: nothing it was
[4:24 PM] vroom vroom baby: It was perfect
[4:25 PM] vroom vroom baby: Just…
[4:25 PM] dummy ❤️: justttt?
[4:27 PM] vroom vroom baby: Just that I was thinking
[4:27 PM] vroom vroom baby: Maybe
[4:27 PM] vroom vroom baby: If u wanted ofc
[4:28 PM] vroom vroom baby: We could
[4:28 PM] vroom vroom baby: Maybe
[4:29 PM] vroom vroom baby: recreate it…
[4:29 PM] vroom vroom baby: ?
[4:31 PM] dummy ❤️: is this ur way of asking me to come over
[4:25 PM] dummy ❤️: 🥺
[4:31 PM] vroom vroom baby: no….
[4:33 PM] vroom vroom baby: ok yes
[4:36 PM] dummy ❤️: i’ll be over in 5 !!!
[4:33 PM] vroom vroom baby: See you soon gorgeous
[4:36 PM] dummy ❤️: tsch
[4:36 PM] dummy ❤️: you spoil me
[4:38 PM] vroom vroom baby: Just speaking the facts 💯
© myysaints
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moonrisecoeur · 6 months
Note
Ur the best sub Leon writer soooo… idk if you seen these but ppl treat las plagas parasite as sex pollen 😭 and I’m so here for it. Concept : re4 leon infected by the parasite OK but he starts out very agressive but ofc he’s a sub so he does whatever reader wants in order to yk… achieve the goal of the parasite (breeding 😔 who said that? Not me) And pls make the reader mean, I love mean femdoms sm, they are chefs kiss. If you need more clarification post it I’ll send another one idk but I’m just seeing what YOU come up with. LOVE UR WRITING btw I love how it’s pretty in character tbh cuz I read ur bully Leon one and I was like “yeah fr like he’s too caring to be a bully 💀”
OMG WAIT MY DUMBASS FORGOT TO ADD: you said smth so mean to him that he came too early. He was so sorry for coming early and the mess he made in you But then he continued to keep going trying to pump more- OK SORRY
the BEST?? idk about that but i shall take ur compliment and deliver to you only my best work so thank u bestie i appreciate it sm !! ^-^
las plagas is crazy cuz like the black veins, the loss of control with your physical body, the pain it causes… that’s literally so hot. leon was so fuckable all of re4 but especially in the scenes where his body is being controlled that man is SCRUMPTIOUS
also just so you know. the veins on his dick are black as well ♡
no pronouns mentioned, afab parts mentioned, plaga leon has to be a top im sorry (technically in straight relationships men are always topping unless u count pegging BUT in this context i mean he’s a top more like ‘he’s a sub but he’ll fuck u stupid’ like that’s the vibe)
you spot his blonde hair from across the hall, running over to him excitedly. thank god you found him.
“leon!” you call out, grabbing the attention of the man in question, as you catch up to him. finally finding him in this nightmarish place after getting separated was the best thing possible, “holy crap, i’m so- i’m so glad you’re okay— woah, what… what happened to you?”
he takes a cautious step back, still seemingly holding a little bit of control over his body, “they said it was a gift in my…. my blood… don’t know what the fuck that was about..”
you take a step forward, reaching out your hand to touch his face, fingers tracing the black lines that were once veins invisible to the naked eye. but he stops you, his hand roughly grabbing your wrist, “don’t.”
“don’t… what?” you ask nervously, shoulders slumped.
“you need to… stay away from me,” he groans from pain, and you’re too worried to listen to his words, “stop, get away from me, you— i could hurt you! i don’t want to hurt you…”
but you don’t listen to him, betraying his wishes by shaking off his grip and reaching your hand out again. he can’t try to stop you this time. he moans, actually moans, when your fingertips touch his face, caressing him softly.
“really? it’s that good?” you ask with a small smirk on your face. leon thinks he could die.
“f-fuck…” he mumbles, finally coming closer to you. his hands wrap around your waist as he leans in for a kiss that you’re not ready for, and you both stumble backwards while you try to ground yourself.
he’s getting rough, aggressive, and you need to push back a little or else he’ll consume you entirely. not that you’d mind.
“leon, ease up,” you whisper, pushing him back slightly, and when a growl escapes his throat, you know he’s clearly not in any state to listen, “leon.”
he annoyedly makes eye contact with you, trying his best to listen to what you’re about to say. he is trying, and that’s the worst part. this is him at his most gentle, most restrained.
“you need to listen to me, okay? can you do that?” you ask softly, hand against his chest to keep him from diving too deep into you, and pressing a kiss to his lips. it’s softer. he moans into your mouth needily, but you don’t let him get rough. instead you sweetly get the taste of him. sure, it’s not a delicious taste, but he’s a delicious experience.
you enjoy the way he’s trying so intensely to control and contain himself, for your sake. he knows what you want from him is not his full fledged desires out in the open, completely unchecked.
when you pull away, he looks wrecked already, “please, you can’t do this to me, not if you’re just going to walk away and leave me desperate.”
part of you wants to reassure him. i’m not going to leave you. i would never abandon you when you need me most. but the other part just wants to ravage him, take all of him for yourself, leave nothing of him left but the perfection you’ve created. perfection in your eyes. maybe he’s not the only one infected with some kind of tainted desire.
instead, to accomplish both, you kiss him again, letting your own intensity and desire take over, potentially overpowering his. he whimpers, his shaky hands holding your hips for stability. he’s not being grossly possessive and rough like before. he’s softer now, pliable.
when you pull away, you whisper, “we need to get somewhere safe.”
“wha… what?”
“i need to take my time with you, and we’re not safe out in the open like this…” you say, leaning in to press a kiss to that sweet spot right below his ear. it’s so cute how truly weak leon is right now. sure, that’s always been his weakness, but it’s elevated multiple times over by this parasite in his blood. you have half the mind to thank that weird cult.
when you find a safe room, you’re immediately back on him, pushing him against the wall, enjoying the way he whimpers as you kiss him, his need for you multiplying by the minute.
“please, please, i need you, i need you so fucking bad, please, i need to take you, need to make you mine, need to—”
“shut up,” you groan, fingers roughly grabbing his jaw, pushing his head back and away from you, “you’re going to be good, or you won’t get what you want. i don’t care how badly you fucking need me, you’re going to be patient. you’re going to be nice and obedient or you’ll get nothing from me. and that little parasite inside of you is horrified at the idea that you won’t get to fuck my pretty pussy, hm?”
he looks pathetic, moaning like a whore at just some words, but it’s the way you say them, the way you say them, that kills him. he eventually calms himself down enough to nod with his eyes shut tightly, “i’ll do whatever you say. you know that.”
“lay down on the floor,” you command, almost growling back at him, and he opens his eyes in surprise.
“what?”
“you heard me. on the ground, beneath me, right now, leon,” your eyes narrow at him, enjoying the way he weakly sinks to his knees before sitting down completely and laying back.
“like this..?” he asks, confused. he doesn’t know what’s about to happen, and that excites him immensely.
you take off your belt with all your utility tools and your jeans along with it. then finally, your underwear. he looks up at you with wide, delicious eyes.
he asks so sweetly, even though he knows the answer, “are you… are you gonna make me..?”
“yeah, you are. i’m going to sit down on your pretty, pretty face and you’re going to enjoy every second of being beneath me, where you belong, servicing me, and making me cum.”
his heart skips a beat at the thought of belonging beneath you, “yeah, fuck, okay—”
“—and you’re not going to fucking talk until i cum, got it?”
he nods, and once you sit down upon your throne, he gets right to work. he laps up the fluids of your cunt like a dog, working tirelessly, sucking on your clit and tongue fucking you. this is his place. he deserves nothing more than to be here with you, caving to your every desire even if all of his thoughts include breeding you and getting you pregnant with his babies. he’d do anything you asked if he could just have that.
he’d be at your service, at your mercy, until you chose to give him what he wanted.
but he makes you cum so fucking hard that it’s impossible to not give him what he wants, especially when rough hands grab onto your thighs as you’re cumming and he’s still giving you the head of your life through your orgasm. he grabs you just to stabilize you, but also to be possessive.
he can’t help how bad he’s gotten about jealousy and possessiveness with this parasite. he’s never been the jealous boyfriend, knowing you could hold your own and you’re loyal and stuff, but something about the way he looks at you now is different. it’s deep and primal. he looks at you like he needs to have you, and no one else can.
it’s insanely hot, but it’s also inconceivable how uncontrollable those urges are. leon has good self control, and you notice it in how he’s acting. again, this is him at his most restrained. he’s trying to keep himself from pouncing on you, taking everything he wants from you because he knows you don’t want that.
somewhere deep inside of him, he’s still himself, still that awkward and dorky guy that just wants to love you and give you everything you want. you wouldn’t want that.
when you roll off of him, laying down next to him to give yourself a moment to recover, you press a kiss to his shoulder, a sign that it’s an act, your harshness isn’t real. he returns the gesture by kissing the top of your head. a sign that he acknowledges your motives.
“please,” he whimpers suddenly, startling you out of your daze as his hand caresses your back softly, “i’ll let you control everything, you can do whatever you want with me, but fucking please, i’m so desperate to put my cock inside of your pussy, baby. i can’t think straight, and i’m trying so damn hard to control myself but i won’t be able to much longer…”
“yeah? you wanna put your cock inside of me? feel it throb inside the wetness and warmth of my cunt, fill me up with—”
he cuts you off with a loud moan, his hands grasping onto you and his eyes shutting tightly at the thought of such pleasure. he looks wrecked at the mere mention of cumming inside of you. you obviously have to capitalize on this fact.
“oh? so it’s the filling me up part, isn’t it? the ‘gift’ you have makes you really want to cum inside me, hm?” you say, smirking cruelly at him, watching his resolve crumble as he moans shamelessly, “do you want… breed me, leon?”
he gasps, breathing heavily. he’s incredibly wound up, and now you know the real reason he’s insatiable and uncontrollable, “f-fuck, i— it’s not that i want to, it’s that i need to… i need to fuck you and breed you so damn bad, i—”
you cover his mouth with the palm of your hand, enjoying the way he groan in pleasure when you straddle him. god, he’s not even inside of you, but he looks fucked out. he looks he’s about to burst already.
“god, you’re so fucking desperate,” you mumble to him, leaning in closer to whisper to him despite having him muzzled with your hand. not that he’d ever hurt you, he would never even imagine it, “you’re going to fuck me stupid, okay? you’re going to fuck me until my legs go numb and i can’t feel anything but you… and only when i tell you you can, you’ll breed me, fuck your cum even deeper into me and not let any of it escape. understood?”
he breathes shakily, not responding. obviously you forgot you have your hand over his mouth. when you take it off, he nervously says, “got it. i’ll… i’ll be good. i’ll make you feel so good.”
your voice is dark, cruel, full of malicious intent, “you fucking better, or i won’t let you cum. you’ll get to fuck me, sure, but i won’t ever give you the satisfying orgasm your body is desperately aching for. you won’t get to fill me up, and all you’ll have left to fuck for your little orgasm is your hand.”
his heart aches. the idea of disappointing you makes him feel a physical pit of nervousness in his stomach, the same ones he felt when he was more like himself. he just wants to feel like himself again.
“g-got it,” he whimpers. you get off of him, and he’s got you pinned immediately, gently resting you against the ground he was previously laying on. the image of you beneath him has him breathless. he feels like he’s worshipping a god with every move he makes.
he slides his cock into you, groaning at how easy it is, how wet you are. he bottoms out almost immediately, enjoying the way your body wraps around him in almost every sense. he silently adores you. he loves that you want him, crave him just like he craves you. that underneath all of your dominance, you’re his lover too.
fuck, he’s starting to feel possessive again. he beings to thrust into you, his body moving faster than either of you can handle, but you keep your cool better than he does.
“don’t let yourself start to think you’re in control,” you murmur, leaning up to press your lips to his shoulder, baring your teeth but not hard enough to draw blood. just enough to remind him of his place, “you belong to me. not the other way around, got it?” you growl into his ear.
he can’t even respond, too enraptured by your body and the feeling of your control over him leaving him a shuddering mess.
and you can’t even deny it. he’s putting in the work, thumb playing your with your clit just like how he knows you like, and clearly he’s getting the results he’s looking for. his body comes closer to the edge sooner than he’d like, but he tries to stave it off, for your sake.
still leaning into him, you whisper in your darkest voice, “maybe i should leave you like this, so you can stay this desperate… for me. i would try and cure you, but… not sure if i really care anymore.”
he shudders, voice giving out on him as he tries to plead with you. he cums without warning, obviously his body did it without the consent and go-ahead of his conscious mind. he already looks embarrassed at cumming without your permission. you don’t really have the mind to care right now, but you remember it for.. later.
“i’m gonna cum, fuck, leon, give it to me, give in to your cravings, your desires, your needs,” you moan in his ear, desperate for him, only him, and he’s yours, he’s all yours, it’s all he’s ever been and all he’ll ever be. he keep fucking you even after cumming, keeping you filled up, pushing it deeper, “make me yours.”
and he has no choice but to comply.
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epiicaricacy-arts · 5 months
Text
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oh we’re still so young, desperate for attention
this was super experimental so i will talk about my process (+ clearer version) under the cut
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i’ve been looking at a lot of “messier” or more textured painting styles recently and an artist that stuck out to me is clariondeluna ! they posted a self-portrait recently that i really liked and i was super interested in the brushwork seen in their work. i love all the textures and how the shapes feel so loose yet everything is so detailed.
that’s not a method for me at all!!!! i cannot paint like that at all and the stuff i like to paint is very different to theirs. which is okay!!!! i had no intention to copy this artists style so closely like with what i tried to do in my raiden painting, i just wanted to try this style out :^)
it’s been a goal of mine to avoid over-rendering like i tend to do a lot, and i think i’ve been doing good with that recently! the mindset i’ve got going on right now is that if i find myself staring at it too hard for too long, i have to leave it and move on. if there’s still something wrong with it, i can fix it later once ive got a fresh view!
i’ve been trying a lot of things with my art this year. i always try to challenge myself with each piece, and to end the year off i wanted to be as uncomfortable as i possibly could be with this painting. i let myself draw whatever i wanted because i still wanted to enjoy it, but everything i did in this process was new, including parts of the subject matter.
i’ve never drawn a head at an angle like this, and i struggle with drawing mouths open. i don’t do bold lighting like this, and if i do, it’s not fire. i’ve never drawn fire! i also rarely work with warm colours and i hate using green, so i combined those to be my colour palette. i like working cleanly so instead of having a dozen different layers for one section, each section only had 1-2 layers for rendering. instead of clipping masks i would simply paint over things loosely and clean it up later. i never like having limbs cut off in a drawing so i had his other arm go GOD knows where. i don’t like weird patterned backgrounds so i made myself figure out how to like it!
IS THIS MY FAVOURITE PIECE OF ALL TIME. no. absolutely not. but i’m very proud of how this came out with all the challenges i put on myself. i WANTED to get better at these things and be more broad with my art, both in terms of the styles and subjects i portray.
okay let’s talk about wtf this drawing is
for those who don’t know, the design in this painting is my fatui/“Father” lyney fan design (read the design post here). the concept isnt super complicated and i don’t really have much explanation for it, but i wanted to combine the story of how lyney wanted a delusion before getting his vision, fire eating circus acts and how olympic medalists will bite their medal to prove it’s real??? don’t quote me on that i’m like 75% sure that’s a thing that happens. i don’t watch sports though so im just believing someone i heard on the internet ages ago.
anyways. i think fire eating acts are cool. and i think the fact that lyney wanted a delusion is very interesting to me. scratches my brain in the right places. and yk as a magician lyneys character revolves a lot around fooling people and creating illusions so i guess what im saying here is that lyney is trying to prove to himself that this power he’s been bestowed is real. bc his whole life his only constant has been lynette so he is trying to see if he can trust this new power. cause i guess this is an alternate universe where lyney does eventually become “Father” but he never got his vision ??? idk im not making lore for this i just wanted to dress up this funny little guy.
ok i’m done
thanks for reading
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here’s my dog
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littlemissmiller · 19 days
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His Good Girl 🎀
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Pairing: dark!coriolanus snow x fem!reader
Summary: you’re famous in the capitol, everyone wants you or to be you, but only coriolanus get to have you. the night you and him take your relationship public, his jealousy and possessive nature overcomes him. he decides to make it clear who you belong to.
Warning: 18+ smut, praise kink, dom!snow, sub!reader, fingering, p in v, oral (f receiving), cum play, hickeys, possessiveness, jealously, porn with a plot
Word count: 5.1k
A/N: hello again :D! wow back to back posts look at me go. so i was struggling to figure out what i was going write next and didn’t expect to post again so soon until like next week, but i stumbled across this in my notes app last night after i published my billy the kid fic and here we are. so enjoy! im not sure what to write about next still. may drop a pedro fic next who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ so anyways here is another dark!coryo for ya ❣︎
Artwork
୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧ ୨୧
Snow found you sitting by the window in his bedroom, gazing out upon the pedestrians as they walk by.
You hadn’t heard him come in and aren’t alerted to his presence until the door closes behind him. You startle and whip your head around. He stands still behind you, his head cocked to the side slightly as he examines you, with a devilish grin on his face. His eyes trail up and down your body. You weren’t expecting him to be home yet, so he had found you in your silk, pink robe embroidered with small white roses. You were clearly fresh out of the shower and about to change into something suitable for the evening and dinner later that night.
“You’re home!” You exclaim
“Is that ok?” Coriolanus asked knowing that the question was completely rhetorical. As if he could only come to his own home whenever you felt it was suitable.
“I just wasn’t expecting you home so early. At least not for two more hours. I was hoping to be all ready for you.” You explain
All ready for him. Coriolanus liked how submissive that sounded. He likes when you were obedient and perfect for him. Especially the last few months as you and him took your relationship further. By now, he has expected you to be at his apartment by the time Coriolanus had gotten home from the University. Given your schedule, he knew he wasn’t keeping you from anything or taking you away from anything either. So where else would you have to go except come to his apartment. And you did.
“I can see. What are you wearing tonight?” Coriolanus asks
Excitedly, you bounce up and rush over to the wardrobe where your dress is hanging up. In your hurry, your robe reveals a part of your bare thighs which Coriolanus takes note of and enjoys the subtle view of your body. You open one of the doors and reveal a pink dress hanging on the back of the door. It’s silk like your robe and Coriolanus already knows that the moment you have it on, he’ll want to tear it off you.
“It’s the one you said you liked the other day at the shop so I sent in an order and had it sent here today.”
Coriolanus thought to himself as he takes a few strides towards you. Good. You are sending things to his apartment. As it should be.
“Just as beautiful as the girl wearing it.” He smiles and walks over behind you.
He grabs your shoulders and his lips give your neck a firm kiss, directly on your pulse. You take the dress from the inside of the door and reveal the mirror attached to the inside of the wardrobe. You hold it up to you, imagining what it will look like on you tonight. You catch Coriolanus’s gaze in the mirror. His blue eyes are piercing through your soul as usual, but there was now a cloud of lust swirling in them. His hands snake towards your waist. He slithers them under your robe and rests them just above your hips. You pretend to not care or notice his actions, but the growing heat in between your legs wants you to give in to him. You tame your labored breathing as you smooth the dress out in front of your body.
“And what will you be wearing, my love?” You ask
“I picked out an all black suit this week. I’ll make sure to adorn a white rose now that I’ve seen this.” He states taking a piece of the pink fabric in between his thumb and fore finger “and you’ll put one in your hair, just in case people forget who you belong to.”
“Well I was already planning on wearing the black diamond necklace you gave me. The one with your initials carved on the back.” You respond touching the center of your chest where the necklace would lay. “Or perhaps I should wear the black lace choker…the once with the gem?”
One of Coriolanus’s hands travels up to your neck. As beautiful as the choker was, the thought of you wearing the black necklace with his initials around your neck seems perfect for tonight. It would tell everyone at that dinner that you were undoubtedly his. Yes, it was perfect.
“The necklace will look nice on you tonight. Wear it.” He whispers in your ear, tugging at it slightly with his teeth. You gasp, finally breaking and giving in slightly. The hand, not wrapped around your throat, travels up and down your thigh.
“Whatever you want.” You whisper back trying to hold back a moan as Coriolanus places a light kiss to your jawline. His hand holds your face up to look at him as he does. It’s hypnotic to watch and he knows it.
“If you behave tonight, you’ll be sure to be rewarded.” He reminds you
You hang the dress back up and he spins you around. He dips in and gives you a proper kiss on the lips. He pulls back soon and mumbles against your lips
“Understand?”You nod your head. He tuts at you and squeezes your hips.
“Say it.”
“I understand.”
The two of you finish getting ready. Coriolanus takes his own shower while you attend to your hair and makeup. Thankfully, being around Tigris meant she was always helping to style you. She had taught you what makeup and hairstyle looks best with certain outfits or styles of dress. So for tonight a soft, baby doll look. And your hair, Tigris decides to put half of it up, tying it in place, then setting it with a white rose, just as Coriolanus asked. You take a look at yourself in the mirror. You’re stunning. Sexy and yet elegant. Your makeup was perfect too. You had a faint tint of red blush on your cheeks and nose, your lips were glossy and plump like a ripe plum. You batted your eyes, now long and defined with mascara and smile at yourself.
When Coriolanus finally sees you as you exit his vanity closet, he’s stuck in place. Temptation washing over him. Tigris spun you around, showing you off to him. She left the room, leaving the two of you alone to finish getting ready. You attach your earrings and finally adorn the necklace. You put on a pair of strappy pink heels and find your purse.
“Ready?” You ask admiring how handsome Coriolanus looks in his suit.
Coriolanus steps towards you, closely examining you as he does. His mouth curves into a half grin. As if he is pleased by the sight in front of him. The dress hugs your body beautifully and the half slit up your thigh is tempting. He grips his hands around your waist.
“I am. You look incredible my dove.” He remarks placing a kiss on your forehead
“As do you. Almost perfect.”
“Almost?” he inquires
You nod your head and walk over to the side table next to his bed. Coriolanus takes note and how the dress falls on your hips and how they sway gracefully, yet subtly from side to side. You pick a rose from the vase on the table. You open the drawer and pull out a safety pin and walk back to him. You stand in front of him and look up at him as you pin the white rose to his lapel. You show off the back of your hair. He touched the rose in your hair and smiled. You turn back to him, wrap your arms around his neck, and whisper into his ear.
“Now you are ready.”
You and Coriolanus leave the house, enter the car, and give the driver the directions. Tonight was to be a “private dinner”, however it was truly anything but. The guest list was to be consisted mostly of Panem’s up and coming young politicians from the senior class at the University. Around thirty students, each permitted to bring a guest. It wasn’t anything too special, but rumors of Coriolanus Snow seeing someone had become rather out of hand. So what made tonight special for the pair of them was the public nature in which they were officially announcing their relationship.
Up until now you and him have tried to keep things a secret to avoid attention from the news, given you are a prominent member in The Capitol. Especially your family. Your father had helped create a new weapon manufacturing business after the war and had been regularly contracted by The Capitol to create weapons in the last few years. He had become good friends and business associates with Strabo Plinth. It gave your family status and you some newfound fame. In turn it would help give Coriolanus some as well. But Coriolanus had you in his life for much more than just that. Having you as his own. His girl. It felt thrilling.
Thrilling to know that only he got to have you. It was no secret that your looks were talked about often. Simply because you were so beautiful with a beloved last name. A name almost impossible to escape given your father’s philanthropy as well as service to The Capitol. So the fact that Snow got to have you. Out of all the other wealthy and famous girls, you were the most desirable. The most popular and loved.
Coriolanus rubs your semi-exposed thigh and watches you watch the city pass by.
“Are you nervous my dove?” he asks
You look over at him and smile. You shake your head.
“Not at all.”
Despite this being a private dinner, he was sure that, by the time they left, word of their romantic relationship would get out and the press will try and snap a picture of them. A type of attention Coriolanus hadn’t received in a while and wasn’t sure how he would react this time around. Your attitude towards this evening however, put him a little more at ease.
“Are you?” You follow up
“Slightly. Not ready for all the attention that we will probably get after tonight.”
You look at him sympathetically and squeeze the hand that is rubbing your thigh.
“It will be fine” You reassure him
He looks at you with a new found sense of confidence. He squeezes her thigh as she continues to grip his hand.
The driver arrives to the mansion where the dinner is held. The house of the Dean of Political Science. Coriolanus steps out, rushes to your side and opens the door. He extends his hand and you take it. Both your arrivals change the dynamic of the party. You move through the crowd towards a group of Coriolanus’s classmates. The polite nods, chatter, and occasional laughs turn into head turns, double takes and whispers as you walk past people. Coriolanus looks at you as you walk. You seem unbothered by the attention and loop your arm around his elbow. Once you make it to your table, his classmates greet him.
“Ah Coriolanus! Good to see you!” Festus Creed exclaims
“You as well Festus.”
“And might I say it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Festus follows up extending his hand to you. You take it and greet him.
“Nice to meet you”
Coriolanus officially introduces you and Festus to each other. You then turn to smile at a few of Coriolanus’s classmates hanging around, but they stay back as to not intrude on your boyfriend’s conversation. They whisper to one another. You couldn’t tell if they were talking about you though. What you couldn’t tell was if it was good or bad. Coriolanus knew however. The sneering looks and childish giggles of Livia Cardew and Clemensia Dovecote were looks that he was all too familiar with. Coriolanus looks at you. You seem to have slipped into a polite conversation with Festus, who by the sound of it seems to be a fan. You indulge his enthusiasm. Coriolanus nods at you and walks over to investigate the conversation between Clemensia and Livia’s conversation. As he approaches they seem too caught up to notice him.
“I mean the matching roses. So cheesy.” Clemensia snickers
“And the matching colors. Like give me a break.” Livia follows up
“Also what is that. A night gown? She looks like a whor-“ Clemensia starts
“Clemensia. Livia. How are you two this evening?” Coriolanus asks firmly, cutting her off
“Oh Coriolanus!” Clemenisa startles “Good to see you.” She says, suspicious of if he had overheard their conversation.
“Anything the matter?” He asks
“No. Why would something be wrong?” Livia asks
“I hope there wouldn’t be.” He states in a somewhat threatening manner
“So your date. What a surprise.” Clemensia sneers not at all intimidated by Coriolanus’s stern manner
Coriolanus starts to feel a strong wave of protection over you, with a slight tinge of possession. He looks at Clemensia with a threatening look masked in curiosity.
“How so? I thought there was rumors of us floating around am I wrong?” He asks
“There were, just interesting to see them be confirmed. Happy for you.” She smiles “Seems like you’re not the only one who is infatuated by her.” She snickers
Coriolanus whips his head around to see that a crowd has gathered around you. A few more of the male students in addition to Festus. They ogle you and subtly fight for your attention. Coriolanus finds himself slowly filling up with rage. He forces a smile to Livia and Clemensia, excuses himself, and walks over to you. You watch him as he walks over. He moves to stand behind you, placing both his hands on your shoulders. He dips down to kiss your cheek and you smile.
“Making friends” he jokes trying to hide his anger
“Apparently” you whisper back
As you and Festus continue the conversation and Coriolanus tries to contain himself. He rubs your shoulders. He’s fuming with anger at Clemensia and Livia. And at the other men trying to steal your attention. Part of that is his fault for walking away from you. Letting them have access to your attention. Still, how dare they. And how dare anybody try to insult you. He wouldn’t stand for it. The evening continues and Coriolanus keeps you close to him for the remainder of the dinner. He watches the people around you. The group of boys from before seem to keep their distance now that Coriolanus refuses to leave your side. He also keeps a close eye on Clemensia and Livia. He wants to teach them a lesson for their gossip and wants to gouge that group of boys eyes’ out.
He tries to temper his anger, but his paranoia seems to continually get the best of him. Maybe you’ll leave him for one of them. Get bored, think taking the relationship public like this is too much. Maybe you do think the matching roses are cheesy and think he’s silly for suggesting it. He glances around at the numerous eyes looking at you. He tries to convince himself that every man looking in your general direction isn’t looking at you but he can’t help but notice how their eyes seem to linger. They way they gawk at you disgusts him.
You and him leave, making sure not to linger after dinner is served. Coriolanus is anxious to leave, practically rushing you out of the mansion and into the car. There is an awkward silence on the way back to his apartment and you try to talk to him, but he just shakes his head and whispers firmly “I’ll explain when we get back.”
His mood seems to escalate as the car approaches the apartment. When it arrives he rushes out in a hurry and you thank the driver before trailing behind him.
“Coryo? What’s wrong.” You ask
“Just get inside” he huffs
You walk past him into his apartment and he follows you. He shuts the door and lets out deep breath in frustration.
“What’s wrong?” You ask again
“I can’t stand how people treat you?” He huffs
“What do you mean?”
“The way they talk, the way they look at you.” He explains. He walk over to a chair in the kitchen and flops himself down. His chest rises rapidly as he looks down at the floor. He tries to control his breathing, but the thought of how that group of boys looked at you, plays in his mind. And he can still hear the obnoxious giggles of Clemensia and Livia.
“And you think that I care? That’s how it always is for me.” You sigh with a laugh
Coriolanus still feels upset however and his body language doesn’t change. He’s still fuming.
“What about the attention from all the boys tonight. Do you care about them?” He perks up
“Is that what’s truly bothering you?” You ask stepping closer behind his chair.
“Partly.”
“And what else?” You ask standing behind, placing your hands on his shoulders.
“A few of my other classmates. I caught them gossiping about us.” He confesses
“Hmm. They are probably just jealous.”
He doesn’t respond as he tries to calm himself down.
“I just want to put them all in their place. Show them they shouldn’t mess with us.”
You start to massage his shoulders and he begins to lean back into the chair and relax. You move your hands up towards his neck and continue to massage him. “And tell me what would you do to them?” You ask.
“I want to sew those girls mouth shut. And tear those boys eyes out.”
“Mmm. Maybe you can find something special for them in Dr. Gaul’s lab” you whisper as you feel Coriolanus sink further into your touch. You run your hands up and down his chest. “Or turn them into avoxes. So they never speak again.”
“And those boys?” Coriolanus asks
“Well if you’re upset at them then you’ll have to put a price on everyone’s head who looks at me like that.”
“I just don’t want them getting ideas” he replies
You giggle and continue rubbing his chest.
“Well they’ll think what they want. Not much I can do there. But it doesn’t matter because they’ll never have me. It’s a game to them. And they’ll never win. They will always lose.” You pause to kiss his cheek “And Snow always lands on top right?” You whisper kissing his earlobe and the side of his jaw. He groans and leans his head back in response. You cup the side of his face and rub his cheek. He turns his head and kisses the inside of your palm.
“You’re the only one who gets to touch me. To have me. Only you. No one else gets that right except you.” You whisper
“Am I?” He asks
“Mhmm” you nod
“Show me”
Coriolanus grips your wrist. He pulls your hand off his face and tugs at it, signaling that he want you to come in front of him. You walk around and stand in front of him briefly. He looks at you lustfully and spreads his legs. You stand in between them and grin at him. He rubs your hand as you slide onto his lap. As you sit, you guide his hand to your thigh and under your dress, slowly guiding him.
“See. Only you.”
He inches up and down your thigh. His fingertips graze the inside, making the heat that has begun to bubble up in between your legs more apparent. You move your hips against his crotch and feel his semi-hard cock aching to be free from the confines of his pants. You lean in and kiss him. He kisses you back and snakes his hand further up your thigh. He brushes his fingertips across your core and feels how wet and hot you have become. He lets out a breathy moan, breaking the kiss.
“Is this only for me too?” He mutters. You nod your head and he snakes two fingers under your panties. He starts to lightly rub at your clit. “You look beautiful tonight.”
“So then I can’t be blamed for wondering eyes now can I?” You whisper back
“No, but they will pay. All of them.” He mouths at your jawline and down to your neck. You tilt your head back, giving him better access. He sinks into your neck, with the goal of marking you up. To show everyone that you belong to him. He sucks and bites on your skin, turing the flesh into fresh black and blue bruises. You whimper at the sensation as you melt into his chest.
“Coryo” you whisper
His free hand begins to grope your breasts over the dress and he moves his hand back down your thigh. He swings your legs over his lap and shifts on his seat. He picks you up unexpectedly and you gasp in surprise. You cling to him. He takes you to his bedroom and tosses you on the bed. You gather yourself and scoot back, as he strips himself of his sports coat. He unbuttons his shirt halfway down, then eagerly, he pulls at your ankles. You yelp and he slides you towards him. He smirks at the look of awe on your face. He could tell you were hungry for him. Not just that, but you seem mesmerized by him. Coriolanus couldn’t tell if it was because of the way your eyes were filled with need or that his clear possessiveness over you had you wondering about what was in store for you. He ran his hands up your thighs, pushing your dress up past your hips. He kneels down and his fingers trace the lining of your panties. You jerk your hips slightly and he takes the opportunity to slide them off your legs. You bite your lower lip in an attempt to hold back your moans, but they stifle out as little whimpers that go straight to Coriolanus’s cock.
“So needy for me.” He smirks
He kisses the inside of your thigh and grazes his teeth over the spot he kissed. He begins to leave the same marks he put on your neck. You can’t help but love how much he’s marking you. You know it’s only because he’s frustrated and wants everyone to know not to mess with you. You whine in frustration, needing Coriolanus to touch you.
“Please Coryo. I want you so bad”
He gives you a devilish grin and squeezes your thighs. “Mmm keep begging pretty girl.”
“I need you. Please just touch me.” You whine
He begins kissing your thigh again, all the way up until he reaches your core. You shutter at the feeling as his lips press against your clit. He moves you closer to him and you rest your legs on his shoulders. You reach for his blonde hair, running your fingers through it. He restrains his actions, only pressing light kisses on and around your clit.
“Coryo please…please.” You beg again
“Mmm that’s it.” He moans
He dives in His mouth fully devouring your pussy. He mouths at your clit and you instinctively squeeze your thighs around his face. He presses your legs apart and devours you even more. He sucks and nibbles at your sensitive bud, taking in the pleasure that is spread across your face. Coriolanus likes having this control over you. He likes hearing the small, soft whines that escape your lips and he loves how you beg for him. How you need him. It makes his ego swell in his chest. He knows you’re addicted to him. He knows that he makes you feel so good. He laps up your wetness and runs his tongue along your folds. It makes your hips buck, causing him to put a stern hand on your stomach.
“Take it baby girl. Try to stay still.” He murmurs against you
You nod your head as he gives kitten licks to your clit before sucking it into his mouth. Without warning, he removes his mouth and replaces the sensation with his fingers. He watches you carefully as your face contorts. He doesn’t hold back as he pumps his fingers into you. You look even more beautiful for him like this. Willing and submissive to his touch. You’re perfect, pretty face scrunched up in pleasure. He drinks you in as he runs his tongue up your thigh. You jerk your hips and he pushes your body back down on the bed. You’re throbbing at this point, so hypnotized under him. He crawls back up to you. His tongue licks a long stripe up your neck, just as he did to your thigh.
“So desperate. Are you gonna be good for me?”
You nod your head, which lands you a firm slap to the meat of your thigh.
“Speak up princess.” He warns
“Yes Coriolanus, I’ll be good for you.”
He strokes the side of your face, his knuckles brush up against your cheek. His hand moves to grip your chin and under your jaw. He forces you to look into his sinful gaze. He leans in and clashes his mouth with yours. He fights to dominate the kiss and you let him. He sits you up as you continue to kiss him. He unzips the back of your dress and it slides down your shoulders. In the same motion, Coriolanus unhooks your bra. He brushes your straps from your shoulders and pulls the rest of the dress from your body. You lay there, completely bare for him. You feel vulnerable, especially given his clothes are still on. You feel like his prey.
“So beautiful like this.” He states rubbing your thighs. He sits up on his knees, towering over you. He begins to explore your body with his hands. He moves them up to kneed and cup your breasts. His fingers gently massage your nipples as he pulls at them. You wince at his actions, squirming under his touch.
“Coryo please I need more…” you beg, your tone sounding desperate and whiny
He smirks. He leans down close to you and gives you a few chase kisses to your neck and up to your ear.
“I like how you sound when you beg. So pretty.”
He tugs at your earlobe with is teeth, causing you to shutter. The action of it going straight to your throbbing core. He rubs his fingers through your slit, humming to himself. He removes them, causing you to whine. He unbuttons the rest of his shirt, revealing his perfectly toned chest. He then unzips his pants and steps out of them. At this point his cock is hard and ready under his briefs. He rubs himself through his underwear as he gazes down at you.
“Touch yourself.” He commands and you obey
Your fingers dragging through your folds slowly as you look back up at him, mouth agape.
“There you go. Good girl.”
“Coryo” you whisper. He smirks at you and pulls his briefs down and his cock springs forward. This isn’t your first time with Coriolanus. Still, every time you got nervous and he could tell. Your fingers slow down and you think about having to take him in you.
“What’s wrong my pet?”
“Just you’re so big Coryo.”
He gives you another smirk “Yeah, but you can take it right? You always take me so well.” He growls, slithering his hand around your neck.
He kisses you as he lines himself up with your entrance. He slides in slowly. At first it’s painful and he keeps his eyes focused on your face to get a read on how you feel. You temper your breathing and try to fixate on how handsome the face staring back at you is. He pushes into more until he reaches the hilt and his hips meet yours. You sigh in relief as the pain replaces with pleasure. You moan and he captures your lips. He dominates you. His lips move fast with yours. He’s clearly just as hungry for you as you are needy for him. His tongue swirls around with yours and he starts to move his hips. You moan again and he breaks the kiss. He looks down at the spot where you both connect and shutters. His gaze returns to yours.
“See. Look how well you take me. Just like you always do. So good for me.”
You nod your head in agreement and wince. He picks up his pace, thrusting deeper and deeper each time. His cock drags in and out of your pussy with ease now, the pain totally subsided. You nod in agreement, but that doesn’t satisfy Coriolanus. He needs to hear you say how much you like it. How much you crave this feeling he gives you. A feeling only he can give you.
“Talk to me. Use that pretty mouth of yours.”
“You feel so good.” You start hesitantly
“More.” He demands
“Mmhm Coryo you fill me up so well. Better than anyone else.” You moan
“The best you’ve ever had?”
“Mhmm.” You moan
In response he grabs your chin and forces you to look into his eyes.
“Use. Your. Words” he demands,, pumping into you harder with each word.
“Yes Coryo, you’re the best I ever had. And you’re the only one I want ooh…” you whine
“Good girl.” He grits through his teeth, giving you more of himself. He hit deeper and deeper, his lust fully overtaking him. He kisses you harshly, pinching and massaging your cheeks. “Only I get to have you like this. You understand?”
“Yes Coryo. I understand.” You mewl
He nods against your mouth. You feel your buildup coming, tense in your stomach, waiting to release. With a few final thrusts, you come around his cock. Your hips buck up, legs shaking, cunt throbbing as he fucks you through your euphoria. Soon enough he’s finishing inside you, stuffing warm ropes of white cum down your hole. You float down from the feeling that he gave you and temper your breathing. He pulls out, admiring as his cum drips out of you. He gets greedy, taking his index finger and pushing it back into you. You moan as he fingers you
“My sweet girl. I hope you know who is here for you. I’ll always watch over you. I’ll never let anyone disrespect you again.”
He pulls his hand away and traces his fingers over your neck, where he had previously sucked and marked you up. He smirked to himself. He puts his finger in your mouth. You suck yours and his collective cum off it and he coos at you.
“I get you all to myself. How fortunate for us both then hmm.
“Mhmm.” You nod, too fucked out to properly respond. As much as Coriolanus wanted you to speak, but he could see how spent you are. He kisses her cheek and settled into the bed next to her.
“Good girl.” He said letting his word be the last.
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Artwork
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holmsister · 1 month
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I think one of the things Dungeon Meshi is definitely about is how different people deal with being an outsider/marginalised/neurodivergent/what have you and basically what im getting at is that Kabru is TEXTBOOK "high functioning [insert diagnosis here]". Its that how they say it still? Don't care.
Basically. This man shows up and you listens to him talk and see how his party treats him and you think. Oh this is a cool guy who has his shit together. And then after like two pages you find out that he has constant flashbacks to Utaya that make him completely freeze, anxiety attacks, thought spirals, is incapable of analyzing his own feelings, is a stuttering mess when the stakes are high, has never done a chore in his life, keeps putting himself in triggering situations and re-traumatising himself, and the icing on the cake is when you read the extra material and it turns out he regularly forgets to eat and lives in a depression nest of dirty clothes and self-medicates insomnia with alcohol and also is 22. Which also kind of puts Misilril not wanting to let him go in another light - yeah for sure she's controlling and infantilising and also its not like she was really helping his issues but also she was not entirely wrong in her judgement. This man does NOT know how to take care of himself. He knows how to do the bare minimum so when he shows up at work the next day he can fool his coworkers into thinking hes got it together enough. For a bit.
He is DEEPLY unwell and he knows it but he is carried by the desperate wish to avoid another catastrophe. If he stops for a moment he KNOWS he'll collapse so he doesn't.
I also think this is why him acting nurse to Mithrun is such an important part of his arc. Its like. This person who has spent all of his adult life focused on a single objective disregarding everything else is faced with what happens when you do that for too long. And the result is a wet tissue of a creature who looks like he doesn't know where he is most of the time.
He is a man on the brink. I have no doubt he felt relieved when he decided he could trust Laios - not even in a Labru way, straight up because he knew he could not keep going like this.
But also like. Of all the characters in the manga, I think Senshi and Kabru are the most lonely ones. Except Senshi seems to be OK with solitude - for sure it's not entirely healthy to be alone for as long as he was but he definitely did well enough. He is very good at taking care of himself. Meanwhile Kabru *knows* a lot of people but can you really say he has friends? Rin, maybe, arguably, but even she does not seem to truly know him, you know? He keeps himself hidden from everyone. I think the only time we see him entirely honest is when he says to Laios that he wanted to be his friend, and hes so shocked when it comes out, you can tell he did not mean to say it. And differently from Senshi, he does NOT fare well alone. He likes people, he needs people. Again compare with Mithrun - he has like a squad of people taking care of him. If Kabru had a breakdown of that size can you say his party would go out of its way to help? Im not sure. Not because they're bad people, but because he's simply not that intimate with any of them.
Idk man it just struck me all of a sudden. Laios is weird and offputting and doesn't care about other humans the way Kabru does and YET he is infinitely more successful at building deep, meaningful relationships and taking care of himself as well. I think this is part of why Kabru is so fascinated with him as well. He can tell Laios has something he doesn't have. Wait this is turning into a whole another post I'll write this next time.
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hey guess what. it's finally time for my Stardew Valley Loredump. i’m about to ramble about my farmer and yo-yo/yoba and shane in a probably long-ass, disjointed post because i have a problem ok. not expecting anyone to read it all of course—just want to finally write these brainstorming shenanigans down. the loredump will be below the cut below the image 👇 (WARNING: IT'S LONG):
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SAMUEL IZAWA:
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*samuel is 28 years old, pan, japanese okinawan (no im not self projecting hahaha), and goes by he/they. main thing is that they’re from “our world” where stardew valley is a video game, but he died and ended up in the stardew universe. because i think isekai tropes are fun and silly. as the player, samuel can do things others in the stardew world can’t do, such as: 
summon the in-game HUD that’s only visible to him, so he can see health/energy levels and inventory and all that.
speaking of inventory, it’s essentially a pocket dimension samuel can shove stuff in. the inventory doesn’t really care about size/weight/etc as long as it’s something the system considers an “item.” so like samuel can put a whole ass four poster bed in there but he can’t do that to a person or a whole house. samuel just needs to touch the item to make it disappear into his inventory. he can then summon it back out when he needs it. the game’s inventory limit system remains the same. samuel gets 12 slots on their own, but if they have a bag on them it increases to 36.
can access the player menu you can normally access in game. so like profile, skills, collections, relationships, etc are all there. no options or quit tab though. having the relationship tab is a nightmare for samuel, who has major insecurities about what people think of him. that tab is a quantifiable measure on how much people like him. it a real brain demon for him to know it exists and is right there for him to access anytime. 
can see the “stats” of food and healing items. hp/energy recovery amounts, buffs, etc. 
*funny thing is that samuel has never played SDV himself and only has knowledge based on what he’s heard and seen online secondhand. ironically he was planning on playing the game for the first time before the whole dying thing ruined it. they can’t even remember how they died, but it doesn’t bother them as much as they think it should. they didn’t leave much behind in that life.
*anyway, i’m talking a lot of game terms here, but don’t get it twisted. while samuel has all these game systems going on, the SDV world is very much a real one that doesn’t normally work by that logic. by that i mean time flows normally like in our world and there isn’t just 4 months in a year. things exist outside the valley. there’s a whole planet of places and people. 
*luckily samuel has help in navigating this new world in the form of yo-yo the junimo, who is the first living thing samuel sees when he first wakes up in that joja cubicle. yo-yo helps explain a lot of things and guide samuel around in its own abrasive way. he’s also there to be like, “hey i gave you a second chance at life so you kinda owe me actually. sign this contract.” and samuel, who is a pushover and also confused, is just like, “ok.” (yo-yo sounds like danny devito btw. because i think it’s funny.) 
*i call the contract a “magical girl contract” because that’s essentially what it is. samuel gets access to extra powers/abilities on top the stuff he can already do as a player. in return he fights monsters n shit for yo-yo and generally does things for them that they can’t do easily on their own. the extra benefits include: 
higher pain tolerance. which isn’t always a good thing. especially when you tend to not be great with self-preservation like samuel is. 
can heal most injuries by just eating/drinking stuff to regain hp.
yo-yo can teleport the both of them around as needed, but it’s tiring and it drains a lot of magic. distance matters too.
yo-yo can spawn items but it drains magic as well. the more valuable/rare the item, the more draining it is. spawning items is already a magic-intensive thing in the first place. also yo-yo isn’t creating the item out of nothing. they’re actually randomly taking it from wherever it already exists in the world. for example, say yo-yo “spawns” a jar of pickles. somebody in the world is going to open their fridge and discover their jar of pickles is missing or maybe a grocery store will have a sudden empty spot on its shelf. yo-yo doesn’t have control of where the items are taken from (or so they claim).
samuel and yo-yo’s magic pools became connected so they can both do more than they could do on their own before. this is one of the reasons why yo-yo wanted a contract with samuel, who has a larger magic pool than normal due to being from another world. but it’s possible for one side to use up all the magic for the both of them. 
*samuel’s personality can be summed up as Awkward People-Pleasing Tired Sad Garbage Dork. either he’s dressed like a grandparent in sweaters and turtlenecks or he’s wearing a button up shirt with the collar undone and jeans. they usually have their neck covered in public to hide the mark of yoba embedded there. he has a “resting bitch face” as some may call, but that’s just because his brain is busy over-analyzing 193828 different things. he loves being outside in the grass and dirt, looking at bugs n shit. he’s also a nerd who likes to play video games and ramble about the lore in them (he likes RPGs the most, but if the game’s got a good story and cool world, he’s into it). they like to do things with their hands like model building/painting. in their new stardew life, they get into woodcarving after willy teaches them the basics (he carves shane a little chicken). 
*samuel does NOT know how to say “no.” absolute pushover. their self-worth is based on how much they’re liked by others, which isn’t healthy obviously. he has a fear that the only way he can be liked is by being useful. he’s scared that he is inherently a bad and selfish person, because he can’t say for sure if he’s helping others purely out of kindness or because it just makes him feel better about existing. deep down there’s anger/frustration that’s accumulated over the years, anger towards himself and also others because he’s always doing things for other people—going above and beyond—but it never feels like enough. at the same time though, they hate it when these thoughts come up because they believe that you shouldn’t go into helping somebody expecting that you’ll get something out of it. he hates how much of a hypocrite he is. he hates how he bases so much of his self-worth on the opinions of others, but feels helpless to it. they usually just push these emotions down because samuel feels guilty about them. how can they be a good person if they’re thinking like this? how can they deserve to exist with this mindset? however they get a chance to let out the anger/bitterness/frustration through fighting monsters. kind of disassociating in a way. this also isn’t a good thing because his demeanor is much colder and scarier during combat. having someone who’s felt powerless for so long suddenly gain power is a dangerous thing.
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*this mindset when monster fighting shatters when samuel meets krobus and realizes that monsters aren’t just the simple enemy NPCs their brain had been automatically categorizing them as. guilt galore. he gets real depressed about that for a while but yo-yo, krobus, and shane are there to help him. 
*SPEAKING OF SHANE… it’s crush at first sight for samuel because hot damn is shane their type. i mean just look at him. mamma mia. haha anyyyway, they first meet at the stardrop saloon. samuel’s waiting at the bar for his to-go order near where shane is drinking. shane’s looking sad, so samuel gives in and decides they’ll start a convo to maybe distract him from whatever’s bothering him. samuel employs the “crack a dumb joke to hide the fact that i’m nervous because i’m talking to a hot person and then use that opening to introduce myself” strat. shane, being an asshole, is like, “oh so you’re the new farmer. here’s a tip: don’t bother me.” samuel takes 999 damage and their brain immediately goes “THIS IS MY FAULT I FUCKED UP like who wants to be talked to by a stranger when they’re sad goddammit why am i so bad at this?!!” it’s overall not a great first impression. after that, samuel tries to avoid shane out of embarrassment, but circumstances keep making them run into each other. for instance, samuel works a lot with marnie with her being a mentor figure to him in animal husbandry, so he and shane have a lot of opportunity to interact through that (plus marnie is secretly trying to get them closer to each other). through these meetings and shenanigans, samuel and shane get to know each other better until one day they’re friends. then good friends. then best friends. then kiss friends. then marry friends. :)
YOBA (A.K.A. YO-YO): 
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*yo-yo is ????? years old and goes by any pronouns but most of the time it's it/they.
*yo-yo is actually THE yoba, but they’re not the completely benevolent creator-of-all-things humans have made them out to be. maybe they were in the past, but now they’re selfish and rude and swear a lot. but they do still care, even if they don’t admit it (tsundere-ass). yoba is currently stuck in the form of a little junimo and is substantially weakened because it gave too much of itself away to the world in the past and got burned for it. because the world kept taking and taking. and now there’s war and pollution and shit and yoba/yo-yo is maybe just a teensy tiny bit angry and bitter now. but it’s ok because now they got this human from another reality to help them reclaim the pieces of itself. and maybe along the way relearn how to love the world again.  
*oh also yoba didn’t create the whole planet like the creation story claims. they’re technically an alien that came across a young planet full of life and decided to stay and help it develop. 
*main reason yo-yo made a contract with samuel is because it needs help finding/reclaiming the pieces of itself. pieces can usually be found in strong monsters empowered by the piece. this isn’t always the case though. sometimes it’s in an ancient artifact. sometimes it’s in a specific place like a temple. sometimes it’s in a person. 
*samuel doesn’t have to deal with having an existential crisis about yo-yo, since he’s from our world where yoba doesn’t even exist as a god. yo-yo claims to be the one responsible for bringing samuel over into the stardew universe, but there are holes in their story. where did yoba even find the power to do such a thing when they’re in such a weakened state? mysterious. 
*the first time yoba reveals itself to shane is kind of chaotic. it’s in the middle of the night when yo-yo suddenly appears in shane’s room, grabs his face with its little stick arms and yells, “WAKE UP!!! YOUR BOYFRIEND IS IN MORTAL PERIL!!!” shane is like, “WHAT THE F–”     it was an act of desperation on yo-yo’s part, because samuel was in trouble and shane was the only one it could think of going to for help. essentially samuel meets something Bad in the deep mines, something that takes him out of commission and puts him in a trance state while draining his lifeforce. y’know, the classic kind of trance state where you need to figure out how to get the person back–how to snap them out of it. yo-yo tried and failed, so that’s where shane comes in. it’s the classic “love-interest-breaks-main-character-out-of-mind-control-with-sheer-power-of-love” trope. except shane does punch samuel during it. lovingly. in the face. hey it works ok.     after the chaos is over and everyone’s safe and gathered together, samuel and yo-yo explain everything to shane (well more like samuel explains everything while yo-yo wishes outloud that they had their memory erasing powers back). shane, who is canonically an atheist, learns that this talking pottymouthed jerkass apple is actually THE yoba and is just like, “yeah. this might as well happen.” and then he remains atheist because what else are you going to do when you learn that god is a talking pottymouthed jerkass apple who calls you a bitch and is also responsible for your partner having to go do dangerous shit. he and yo-yo have a rocky relationship at first to say the least. but once they both realize how much the other cares about samuel, things get a little better. 
*yeah, yoba may be a bitch and they may be angry and they may be bitter, but they really do care, even if they try to convince themselves otherwise. even though so much got taken from it, it still cares about humans and dwarves and shadow people and everything else on the planet. and when it eventually comes down to it, yoba will step up to protect what it loves, even if it means losing everything again. 
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SHANE FINCH: 
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*this post was technically supposed to just be about my farmer and yo-yo’s lore and stuff, but i gotta give some personal headcanons i have about shane… like for instance his last name is “finch.” because i thought the bird theme was cute. he’s 29 years old, bi, and half asian, half white (in our world that asian half is korean). i’m not being specific because i don’t know if korea even exists in the stardew world, since all we know in the game is that there’s a “ferngill republic” and a “gotoro empire.” i was thinking of just headcanoning that stardew’s planet is essentially the same as earth. so like most of the same countries/nations exist except the history diverged a bit along the way, leading to the ferngill republic and gotoro empire. OK SORRY for the tangent—back on topic.
*so shane is a trans man who started transitioning back in high school. he had two best friends who were very supportive and really helped him on his journey to figure himself out. those two friends were like family to him. it was good that he had this support because his parents were always pretty shitty and shane transitioning just made them act even shittier. the only good family member of shane’s is marnie, who was supportive, but she lived far away, was busy, AND wasn’t on good terms with her sister (shane’s mom), so shane didn’t get to see her much. 
*the moment shane became a legal adult, he got away from his parents, finding a place with his two best friends and moving in together. oh and his friends’ names were rosa and heath. should’ve probably mentioned that earlier oops.     shane, rosa, and heath go to the same college together, suffer student loans, graduate, etc. haven’t thought of what shane would get a degree in yet—most likely something “generic” because he’s unsure of what he wants to do himself (i feel u bby). 
*ok so rosa and heath were dating since high school, but they were so comfortable with shane and vice versa that things never got that awkward living together. however when rosa and heath got married (“yoba, FINALLY,” shane would say), shane felt like it was time to find his own place, much to the devastation of his bffs. the apartment ended up close to where rosa and heath lived of course—the couple made sure of it (“stop backseating my apartment hunting!” “MAKE US”). 
*rosa and heath get pregnant and have a healthy baby girl that they name jasmine. i headcanon jas as black (from heath’s side) and portuguese (rosa’s side). everyone is thrilled about the baby. shane was immediately offered godfather role and he happily accepted. jas was the cutest baby ever and he adored her. he babysat jas all the time. 
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*jas was 4 years old when rosa and heath tragically passed away in a car accident. they were coming home from a business dinner when they lost control of their car on some black ice and slid into oncoming traffic. shane was babysitting jas when he got the call. in the span of one cold winter night, shane and jas’s world shattered. 
*rosa and heath didn’t have any reliable relatives either. those relatives only came to take the money and belongings. shane was the only one jas had, so he adopted her. he tried his best to pick up the pieces. he really did. he lasted for a year trying to raise a kid on his own with the salary of a dead-end job, but he knew the situation wasn’t good with the money and how much his mental health was spiraling. he knew he and jas were in dire need of more support (“jas deserves better than this”). so he turned to the one person he had left to rely on: his aunty marnie. and that’s how shane and jas ended up in pelican town.
*shane’s joja jacket was actually originally rosa’s. rosa worked as an accountant for joja and would get free promotional items all the time from the company. the jacket was one of the only things she actually ended up using because “it’s pretty comfy for being joja bs.” she would wear it all the time, much to her more fashion-conscious husband’s chagrin (yet he would patch up any holes she’d get in it anyway). after rosa died, shane kept her jacket. there were a lot of memories in it. 
~~~
ok that’s it for now. if anyone actually read all that, thank you for even wasting your time to process my ramblings. i’m sorry it’s so fucking long like jfc.
*who is mr. qi?
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cranberryjuice-posts · 3 months
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hiii want to say that i just met your blog and i obsessed with it!! i really love your writing. anddd i want to make a abby request, abby and reader are in college and abby is like super popular and when they start to date reader is called “abbys girl” all the time and get super flustered? i dont know if i express myself good, english is not my first language, sorry! hope u have a amazing day, xoxo <3
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- Abby’s girl -
Pairings - modern au! Abby Anderson x Fem! Reader
An - this is kinda bad I’m sorry 😭😭 I wasn’t really sure what plot to write but I still appreciate the request.
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Everybody was cheering. With only a minute left on the clock the Seattle wolves vrs the Jackson mustangs— one of the oldest lasting rivals on and off the court, were pushing one another around trying to keep Abby from making her shot.
The blonde dodged around trying to avoid the other team. Making it to the 3 point line she threw the ball. Going through the hoop the clock blared at the same time, the referees announced the wolves win making the home side scream with excitement.
Abby shouted happily, making eye contact with you she grinned. Making your way out of the stands was easier said then done.
Eventually getting to the locker room you walked towards Abby’s spot. One of her teammates walked past you taking a moment to say hi. “Shit It’s Abby’s girl, hey she’s just over there the girls are cheering for her”
You felt your face turn red, “oh thanks” with a smile you watched as she walked away before going towards the shouting. Being the girlfriend of the basketball team captain tended to help boost your own reputation. Most of them didn’t know your name only addressing you as ‘Abby’s girl’.
Was it your preferred way of being addressed… well no. But it wasn’t the end of the world, all it did really was embarrass you.
Setting your purse down by Abby’s duffel bag on the bench you watched as the girls other girls crowded around her, chanting Abby’s name while they all celebrated their big win which would now take them to state. You were and always will be Abby’s biggest supporter, no matter what you would never miss any of her games.
She instantly noticed your presence, breaking free abby quickly made her way to you. Grabbing you by the waist she pulled you into a messy kiss. It was full of adrenaline and not coordinated. Pulling back Abby kept her face close to yours. A few of the other girls on the team chuckled at the display making you blush. “Hey” abby flirted against your lips.
“Hi” You giggled “You did amazing out there.. I mean really I genuinely believe Your Gonna win this thing”
“And im Gonna do even better tonight” she continued her cocky streak, pressing your hips against hers.
You rolled your eyes finding her attempts at seduction funny. “Uh huh, I’m gonna wait for you outside ok” kissing her one more time you gasped as she grabbed your ass. You rolled your eyes as you pulled back, giving her a warning look as Abby remained on her high.
You sat down on a bench near by the exit. Pulling out your phone you started to scroll on Instagram, trying to decided what to make a post about. That and finding a new restaurant near by to take Abby to, just to celebrate her big win before she actually tried to get you pregnant.
“So your Abby’s girl huh?” A woman spoke. Looking up you were taken back by seeing Ellie Williams the Jackson mustangs team captain.
Confused you nodded “uh yeah..”
She just scoffed. “How the hell did she manage to pull you” standing up you grabbed your purse, Ellie knew you had been offended by what she said.
“First of all she didn’t pull anyone, how we got into a relationship was because she’s a good person and secondly” you looked her up and down “why are you even over here, your bus is on the other side of campus”
“Damn, I was just asking” she laughed crossing her arms “but seriously though Abby? Her being a good person, that’s total bullshit she’s anything but good, besides I can do anything she does”
“Except win a Game”
You could tell Ellie was starting to loose her patience. Why was she over by you, to hell if you knew. There was a tense silence between you both, before she could speak the back door opened.
Abby stood tall and strong as always only her former grin was replaced with a look of disgust. Getting up you walked over to her, kissing her cheek. “Williams”
“Anderson”
Both girls staring at each-other with a Look of hate, You had heard Time and time again the rivalry between the two schools and between their families. “Why are You over here, and better question why are you talking to my girl”
“Fuck dude nobody’s trying to fight Dina just forgot her bag inside I offered to come get it.” Ellie looked at one once again before gesturing her head to Abby. “Your Girl seems like a real catch, guess you got lucky”
“Guess i did” her response was harsh. At this point you were fed up with the conversation and dealing with Ellie. Grabbing Abby’s hand you pulled her away.
——
Sitting on Abby’s bed you laughed softly at watching her go on a rant. “And don’t get me started on Joel the sheer fucking audacity of that man! He punched my dad because he couldn’t help Ellie. I repeat he punched MY DAD— why are you laughing”
“Nothing Nothing its Just.. your really cute when you get mad” Abby flipped you off making you laugh once again. After a moment she sat down on the bed beside you, taking a calming breath she leaned over kissing you softly, slowly, sensually.. pulling back she gently squeezed your hand.
“What did I do to deserve you” she muttered.
“Not much but working out and getting buff and being blonde helped, you know the important shit” you gave her a charismatic smile
“Your not Funny”
“I’m hilarious”
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