#ok maybe it’s just me. nostalgia for a game that died like what 2 years ago

[scorchrend]

ok maybe im a little crazy

[voltrixz]

*puts on fake mustache* hello voltrix uhh what's your favorite little sillies yknowalso whats your favorite games please put a long detailed list i will totally not do anything with this info

Hello random tumblr user with a fake mustache that isnt my good friend lime

However yes I will tell you about my favorite little sillies (which im guessing is favorite characters) and my favorite games all in a long detailed list

Ok for games its probably ( not ranked)

HOLLOW KNIGHT!!!!

I've always heard of it and how good it is for like a good 2 years I'd say but never checked it out until like I'd say in the summer of this year. BEST CHOICE OF MY LIFE TBHHHH, its so so GOOD. So many of the characters are so memorable and honestly have rlly sad stories that made me so so so sad and AQUGHHHH theres so so so much of the story to analyze. I LOVE ANALYZING ITS STORY and the little like details of each character. For a game I put off due to the supposed difficulty and my non existent experience or skill with these type of games, I did not expect for me to enjoy that much. BECAUSE I DIED SOOOOOO MANY TIMES early game and even later on but I HAD to keep on coming back to play because the game is just so so so PRETTYYYYY, like aughhhh eye candy and as I mentioned before, the characters and story are really really awesome

MPN!!!! (Madness Combat:Project Nexus )

Honestly was really excited to play this game when i finally could but also feared I would give up since it isnt the usual type of game im used to and would probably find it difficult. (they had a tourist (easy) mode, cant believe they planned this just for me) EITHER WAY I FUCKIN LOVE MPN!!!!! However i think the interactions/dialouge for each character in this game is my fave part. DEIMOS' LINES ARE SO FUNNY (and fruity) AND I LOVE HANK'S DIALOUGE TOO, he's just a tiny bit silly but very insane. Also love how you can just move the mouse around and the characters will just spin in circles, its so silly, go gay boys go!!! ALSO!! love just in general every character's dialouge AND TRICKY'S LEVEL AUGHHHH, died a few times but ITS SO GOOOOOOODDDDDDD AUGHHHH, still need to finish the storymode (gave up on the last boss when I died on the last health bar) (my computer was about to explode either way (the got into hk and kinda forgot about it) HOWEVER I DO RLLLY RLLY want to get back into it, complete storymode and go through arena mode

POKEMON SUN!!!

Would I consider this a favorite game soley because of nostalgia and because it was my first actual pokemon game? Maybe. But did I have fun with it? YES Plus the game has Popplio (FAVE POKEMON EVER) also AUGHHH got so attached to my team in that game. Also I love the alola trio so much (Lillie, Hau and Gladio) and THE PROFESSER, he is so silly, shoutout to him and his wife for being the best bi4bi married couple ever, also heheh LOVE SOLGALEO SMMMM, its so cool. ALSO GUZMA, AUGHHHHH banger character. Rlly wish my 3ds worked so I could revisit the game tho :(

Thats all the favorite games for now (would add endacopia but I'll wait till the full game releases)

OK UM FAVORITE SILLIES!!!!

This is super obvious BUT AUDITOR AND PHOBOS

AUGHHHH LOVE THEM SO SO MUCH, love the both silly and really interesting trivia about them

The duality of Auditor canonically having a sweet "tooth" compared to how Krinkles sees Auditor as inferior to the rest of the employers since they level themselves down to the mortals in Nevada and picks fights with them

Along with the duality of Phobos having his size (around the height of a half MAG) because he's on a GOMAD diet (a lot of milk) and then his descent into insanity and how his egomaniac tendencies took over his sense of judgement

I just think they're really really cool and honestly REALLY REALLY interesting characters if you dig deep enough (and become morbidly fixated on them and understand them on different levels)

Other characters would be NOISEMASTER!!! (silly funky guy that is actually quite fucked up and rlly fuckin tragic when you think about it), another would be QUIRREL!!!!! (also rlly fuckin tragic but aughhhh geniuely such a kind and caring character love him) and uhhh SNIPER AND PYRO (THEY ARE LITERALLY ME FRRR)

Maybe have rambled a bit much but I sure hope you totally dont do anything with this info

[cosmic-navel-gazin]

This is something a bit different from me, but in light of the recent announcement from Ubisoft that there’s going to be a remake of Prince of Persia: Sands of Time coming out in January 2021, I thought I’d share some thoughts.

(This started out small but got outta hand so super long post incoming, no spoilers for the games)

So first off, a bit of my history with the original game.

 I’m a big fan of the Prince of Persia (PoP) franchise, and I’ll fully admit that nostalgia plays a big part in it. You see, in many ways this 2003 classic was my real entryway drug into the world of videogames.

It wasn’t the first videogame I had ever played. My friends had consoles, there were some games on the school computers, but I didn’t own games as a kid. As far as my parents were concerned, these were all the spoils and soul damning devices of Lucifer himself. You know how it is, every generation goes through this thing of blaming all the world’s problems on a new artform: rock and roll, comic books and then videogames.

So yeah, a gaming console or buying games for the home computer was a BIG NO-NO! 

But of course, the more an authority figure says you can’t have something, the more you want and crave it. It was only a matter of time until the opportunity presented itself to me.

And then the day finally came.

It was just me and a couple of friends, going to this new magazine store near the school. And there it was: the dvd case that came with a gaming mag for like 5 euros if I remember correctly, stupid cheap for such a great game. 

There was doubt, there was fear, there was anxiety. I didn’t know much about the game, only the old 1989 DOS Prince of Persia:

This had the same name but looked different. I was seduced immediately.

The case stared longingly at me:

 It’s not my fault, I was bewitched and I bought it.

My symbol of rebellion, my first big transgression, and my first real treasured posession that I bought with hard earned money.

PoP:The Sands of Time was my original sin so to say:

Accurate representation of what happened that day

I furiously installed the game as soon as my parents left the house. Played it for a couple of hours and stood in awe at the thing - the cinematics, the cool parkour moves, the arabian nights setting, the time manipulation to undo mistakes when platforming or in combat, the Prince breaking the fourth wall saying:”no no no, that’s not what happened, let me start over” whenever I died and got a game over…

You have not experienced true fear if at some point in your life you didn’t feel the cold sweat running down your back as you hear the very distinct sound of your parents’ car arriving when you’re doing something “prohibited”.

 As soon as I heard that sound, I quickly quit the game, uninstaled it (I could not run the risk of them finding out I had tainted their machine with a videogame *gasp!*), and ran to my room to hide the game before opening the door for them. 

Neetheless to say, I never made much progress since I had to start over every time after quitting and uninstalling the thing. I would just play those first couple of hours over and over, never knowing how the story progressed, but I was happy all the same. At one point I knew every line of dialogue, every music cue, every sound effect of that beginning part. It would be some years before I got my first laptop and finally managed to complete it. 

All of this to say that the game means a lot to me. Not just as a product or piece of entertainment. This wasn’t casually playing on someone’s gameboy advance or PS2 to have a bit of fun and pass the time.

 This was more intimate.

 It was just me; the game; a dark room and a blanket; and a sincere and charming, simple but compelling story told seamlessly through mechanics that only enhanced it. This was me witnessing gameplay and storytelling going hand in hand in a way that even many of my other favourite games don’t do, or don’t do as well (there’s usually some disconnect where a game only manages to really excel at one but not the other).

Ok, so on the announcement and trailer:

As a big fan you might think I was super hyped for this. 

But I gotta say…no, not really.

I’m not super angry, but I’m not really excited either honestly. And I don’t think it’s just the rough and uncanny character models and animation that people are pointing out all over (although that doesn’t help).

I guess to talk a bit on that, I should stress out that my problem isn’t that it doesn’t look realistic enough. To be honest, and this is going to sound rich from a big Witcher 3 fan, I think that the gaming industry overall, moreso big tripple A titles, seem to have this unhealthy obsession with photorealism. Like, I don’t need to see the characters’s pores to care about these polygon people. Strong art direction is what I feel is more valuable. I just don’t think this arms race to photorealism is sustainable. Games are taking longer to make and fund, and I’d rather have dev teams spend more time polishing and refining the games’ mechanics and/or story if the trade-off is less “realistic” graphics.  

It might just be personal preference, but I wish we were getting more stylized character and world design. Go look at some screenshots for Pathologic 2, a game that came out last year that hits that sweet spot between full-blown cartoony/caricature and realistic by today’s standards:

And I think that is somewhat what they were going for with this remake’s character models (or I hope it was). But it’s still not quite there, hopefully they’ll work on improving those so they can hit that sweet spot also.

(in defense of my hipocrisy and love of The Witcher 3, I think the more realistic look was appropriate for the world they were portraying, it benefits from it. However I don’t think I would love it any less if it had less detailed models and environments)

One last thing on the graphics.

I will say this though, at least from the footage we see in the new trailer the team seems to be capitalizing on colour. Big vibrant reds, blues, whites and yellows in the environment look great, and really captures the 1.001 nights/arabian nights feel that I absolutely love. I appreciate that since there’s always this tendency for remakes to suck all the colour and life from the original (in both games and movies), regardless if it fits the setting and tone or not.

Anyway, I think the reason I’m very much without a big reaction is that I believe the 2003 original is a true classic, a masterpiece even - I guess I should stress out that when I say masterpiece, I don’t mean it’s perfect. Just that the whole is bigger and better than the sum of its parts, that the things it does right, it does so right, that it completely overshadows the flaws. 

The story, the art direction, the gameplay (the holy trinity of platforming, combat and puzzle solving), the brilliant introduction of the dagger of time as a gameplay and story mechanic (one of my favourite mechanics in all of gaming), the music, the charming duo that is the Prince and Farah, the tight pacing with the game being just the right length and not overstaying its welcome, the outstanding level design where you’re never stuck doing one thing for too long (the game is always juggling between combat, story, platforming and puzzles, mixing and matching)… 

Looking at all these things, I just really don’t think we need a remake because I don’t think there’s that many glaring terrible flaws that could justify it. 

Adding more scenes and content could be good, or it might backfire: bloat and ruin the game’s already excelent pacing and fluidity (which I think is the main keyword that better describes the original, everything flows superbly). The original was only 6-8 hours long and it is better for it. I’m not confident that adding dozens of hours of gameplay like the big tittles today would help at all.

The only real improvements I can see are: 

tweeking and perfecting the combat (I’ve seen it mentioned that they’re implementing a targeting system which sounds good); 

perhaps also better Farah’s A.I during combat when you have to help protect her from swarms of enemies;

Maybe throw in a couple more enemy types? The cut sand tigers for example? 

usual things like adding the option of subtitles, add the ability to skip cutescenes;

But other than that…

I don’t even think the graphics of the original look bad. They’ve aged of course, with the game being 17 years old, but still. I installed it last night and played through the first hour to take some screenshots and I think they’re still good:

I can understand the MediEvil remaster, the Spyro remaster or the more recent FFVII remake in terms of wanting to update the graphics. I can understand that not everyone can easily go back to these low poly lads:

 But this game? I know I’m influenced by nostalgia and all, but I don’t think it needs that makeover that badly, especially when compared to these other remakes and remasters. Funnily enough, I just noticed that these examples I just listed were all PS1 games. PoP: SoT was a PS2 , PC and Xbox game. PS2 era games have aged far better visually and don’t need that big a makeover in my most humble opinion.

It would be one thing if the original was out of print like a Rule of Rose scenario ,where you can’t find the game unless you go to ebay or something and it’s stupid expensive. Or if it was a pain to get running on modern systems like it was with Grim Fandango, until it got a remaster. 

But no, you can find the Sands of Time trilogy and the PoP (2008) reboot on GOG and Steam (on Steam only there’s also the PoP:The Forgotten Sands midquel). So there isn’t the usual problem of the game no longer being accessible to people who want to play it, which helps justify the need for a remake.

The original still plays nice, sounds nice and looks nice, so I guess this all goes to show that at the end of the day, this remake just feels a bit unnecessary to me, at least from what little the trailer showed (I would love to have my bitter cynical ass proved wrong though!). 

 Maybe I just have a superhuman tolerance for older games and how they look, I really don’t have that big a problem if the game itself is good or interesting, so I don’t always think older games need remakes.

Maybe my falling out of love with Ubisoft in this last decade has curbed forever any hype I might have for their announcements, even when they pull out my  son, my baby boy Prince of Persia out again.

 Maybe I’m just burnt out and too pessimistic about remakes, remasters and adaptations (although game remakes usually do better than film ones).

And this makes me a bit sad because I don’t want to sh*t all over the first piece of “new”  Prince of Persia content we’ve had since 2010??? Oof, it’s been a while.

Especially knowing that Yuri Lowenthal is coming back and excited to voice the Prince again. And I also don’t want to be too harsh since we’re looking at an alpha of the game. But so far I’m just very numb to this, I do seriously hope it turns out good and that they don’t rush it out the door. But I’m not convinced we need a remake in the first place. The original is a milestone, a game changer. I’d rather see a game that had great ideas and poor execution being remade than something people already love and consider a masterpiece.

 Guess we’ll see how I feel once more news and footage come out.

Oh and feel free to share your own thoughts on this remake. I’m curious to know what both fans and newcomers alike think.

small edit: I can’t believe I was just watching this Sands of Time playthrough on youtube and at one point it is said: “Another game that is designed similarly to this is Soul Reaver actually.” 

Of course! I didn’t even see it! All of my favourite things are connected!!! Maybe that detail was another thing that helped me getting really into Soul Reaver as I was first playing it.

[reimahowaido]

Spyro: Reignited review 2.5

The Dragons of Artisans World! Let's have some words on all of the dragons while I'm at it~ Why not :2 Nestor - God I love his design. It's so good. It really does fit him and the idea of him that I had as a kid. Truly the image of 'he leads these dragons' with the very first glance. And I love the voice too, is the good stuff~ Kind and very welcoming sound coming from this dude. His colors are great too. Is it biased or boring to just, like the first fella you see a lot? Because I do like him a lot. I imagine many people like Nestor though. Shoot, I like his name too. This dude, perfect. Super good. Great job everyone Delbin - Artist boi~ As a kid I saw him as an angry aggressive kind of dude. Somehow he just, came off as being very angry when I was a kid. Maybe his voice actor had that kind of vocals or something? Anyway, he seems like a kind fella to me now. Yes he might have a deeper raspier voice, but those thick eyebrows and the effect they have, making him look like he's going ÓuÒ I kinda like him a lot more now. He's great, I'd love to just sit down and paint with this dude. I dunno what if anything we'd talk about, but just doing some painting with a chill buddy would be nice Tomas - I've shared my thoughts on him already earlier like a year or 2 ago. He was my fave as a kid, but now he's not at the top anymore. I still loooove his energy and attitude, the jokester feel I get from him & the emoting he does with his hands and body. Tomas is still great, don't get me wrong! My expectations were just suuuuper high and I didn't expect the beard etc. Nothing bad with beards, sometimes they're really cool and nice~ It just wasn't part of my own vision and nostalgia, so that's why it takes points away from my own personal ranking. He's still great with his smile and grin! But ye, I like the little musical note sound as he jumps up Argus - I love his watermelon. I love he. Also the first moment where I immediately went 'oh god he sounds so nice, I could listen to him speak for hoooours' the voice is that good. Soothing and soft, tell me a story I'll listen. Also he just looks really friendly with his glasses and all. Not to say that glasses make you automatically friendly or anything, but just, story teller, let me grab a pillow and a snack and let's craft up some silly stories

Lindar - A favourite design boi here we go~ Not my absolute fave, but certainly up there~ I feel like many people like him, and for a reason xD I love his colors, the blue and yellow here are really great~ And clocks are cool, lots of work goes into them. Also love his goggles and goggle horns. That stuff is cool and nice and yeeees. "Not that you ever run into trouble, Spyro" yeah maybe not Spyro, but yes, yes I do, me, the fella who died in Artisans homeworld. Me. Lindar, I am baby, I fail, a lot. Don't have high expectations on me Astor - Magical portal fancy vortex thingamajiggyr, love the enthusiasm in his voice. He's pretty great too overall, a nice fella. I do like him Gavin - This boi got tattoooooooos and he a barista, he's Really cool~ Also I think he had all those elements from one of the artists who worked on the designs, yes? I also love the work of said artist, I'm bad with names, I feel the name started with Co- or Col- but it's not quite at my grasp. Either way, we love Gavin in this household, he's great and his design is great and now I want hot chocolate but it's 3am and others are sleeping so I can't (QuQ) Gildas - Gildas my man! Honestly at this point, if it weren't for him I'd not have gotten all that far at all in the game. That hint on gliding, as simple and small as it might be, has saved lives - or at least attempted to. I'm as enthusiastic as Spyro when listening to this fella. He certainly sounds and seems like the kind of fun art teacher who is super kind and understanding and just great to be around. Such supportive energy from this man. And I love his design too~ Paint splatters everywhere, he's definitely an artist because we messy. The big paintbrush is also very great~ And the little pose and smile at the end of his speech, also great~ Alban - I forget if I wrote about him before, I think I did (I think I wrote about a bunch of dragons years ago, but I'm not going back to that post until I'm done with the game just to see if I feel differently now). There was that whole 'this is Spyro's dad' thing when I was a kid, with him being purple and all that jazz (and the whole 'oh it's you'). But that aside, I like this dude~ Can't imagine how strong that tail of his has to be to support him and his whole weight, but that does make him kinda unique when compared to most other dragons~ Is a cool pose :2 And I like the blue... Frills or scales he has, gives off some slightly aquatic feel in a way Oswin - My first feeling on him is some sort of memory about a recolor or model. Like there's a green Oswin or such somewhere. Anyway though, I think I liked him as a kid too, just something about telling secrets and getting to feel special or something. He aight, I do like secrets, and the room he's in is cool Darius - Many comments made on some Shakespeare references I bet. I'm not one of those kids who were forced to read those books as a kid. Not English native, no such experiences. The skull and reference is cool though, even if mostly lost on me. Also the note on the big Gnork using 'Her' pronouns, big ladies, that's cool honestly and refreshing Nils - Nils Nils Nils Nils, snakey long boi, he gets me hyped. that one camera angle of him as he's bowing, polite tall man, it's kinda hilarious in a way but I love it so much! The way he poses after stepping away to look at the statue he's working on. His long thin moustache. The green and cream colors. The red scarf. God I love everything about him, voice and all. Even the fact he knocks over his sculpture at the end. Oh no baby oh nooooo it makes me laugh a little on the inside I can't help it xD It's tragic and sad, but it just adds so much personality and life to the character Devlin - Same hint as Gildas, so it doesn't hit quite as hard here and my brain didn't really grasp it, but honestly, good on them for doing it twice, it's what my brain needs because understanding that gliding thing took me a moment. But ay, that aside, he sounds so friendlyyyyyy I love that~ The Rs in his words~ Also cake, yes, I want to bake, let's bake something sweet,

like cake or pancakes. I've never actually baked a cake on my own, maybe one day. Alvar - Ok I like

him a surprising amount. The food stuck on his tail, the way in which he just throw-jabs stuff on the ground all angrily, yeet the scewer, yeet the knife, the way he runs out of breath when rambling. This dude's got an attitude and I respect him for it. The drama, the energy. Also I. I want barbecue, I want grilled food. It makes me hungry. I could say he's one of my favourites too, very memorable for sure! Thor - Older sorta fella, the name always makes me think of the God of Thunder, so it's quite the different feeling when seeing this dude. He does have some braids which does give off a small bit of Norse energy. And right, the words, on the guidebook. I've not yet mentioned it in these reviews but I'll certainly get to it. I had figured it out before talking to Thor, but it's a fine addition. I don't have a lot to say on him, but as many others, he looks friendly too Nevin - I like his voice~ Another painter fella. Smug expressions. And I'm now noticing that he has some big wings, there's size to those, like daym, I almost got used to the smaller sized wings but when he jumps and flaps his to be off, kinda nice and impressive. Spyro kinda steals the show here though, him saying 'barbecue' is just, niiiice

[obscurum-passagium]

i forgot to keep doing these so here we go:

it’s that daily meme thing. but i’m just going to do the rest at once because, honestly, i’m not gonna remember to do this shit every day.

day 2: a game to make you happy

TRT! which was my answer to the first one (first game played.) and it’s all that nostalgia that makes me really happy.

day 3: favorite music

MHM and SAW are both fantastic. SAW is probably my favorite, MHM is maybe the most effective cause it never lets up with the anxious/scary mood. 

day 4: a game for a rainy day

weirdly enough, DDI springs to mind first. probably because it’s nautical/aquatic and has a cozy café in it... though CRY would be great and GTH as well. 

day 5: favorite location

wickford castle probably. at least for like, the one i’d want to actually go to the most. but the ryokan hiei as well... i mean it’s fake haunted but looks pretty chill post-haunting.

day 6: favorite phone character

god, all the ones in SSH? i feel like that game had such a vibrant off-screen cast of phone characters. they all had wonderful voice actors. 

day 7: favorite boss

i’m not 100% sure what this means because i mean. we’re not talking video game boss here. favorite person that employed nancy? idk. all bosses suck

day 8: game with summer vibes

ASH for sure. sunny hometown vibe with an ice cream shop? very summery. CAR probably has this too but i honestly kinda hate that game

day 9: a puzzle you love

the BULLSHIT hieroglyphic puzzles in TMB. the frame backing puzzle in SAW. clamming in DDI (this isn’t a puzzle, i know, but i love it) 

day 10: game you always revisit

TRT, FIN, DOG, CUR, SSH, SHA, MHM

day 11: best storyline

i mean, it’s gotta be CUR. “i’m turning into a werewolf nancy come help” like ok. like hell yeah. lets solve this shit. unbelievable.

day 12: favorite second chance

nancy getting her guts fucking squashed in the elevator in TRT. hands down. nothing else comes close

day 13: best quote

“I may have to cut this short, Hal. Someone just climbed out of my wardrobe.”

day 14: game with best characters

SSH for sure. love em all. they’re such a good clusterfuck and one really ugly tie

day 15: funniest moment

i’m not sure if there are any, like, really genuinely funny moments in these games. i’ll have to come back to it and see if i think of something. 

day 16: best game ending

being able to let people burn to death in GTH. metal

day 17: most surprising culprit

i remember being shocked that joseph was the guilty one in FIN when i played it for the first time when i was like 12 or something. overall tho.. i honestly don’t worry too much about who did it lmao. like i don’t super care? weird, i know. but whoever it is i’m like “yeah, okay, that’s fine” and then my life continues as normal. i guess i don’t get super wrapped up in these games

day 18: the easiest game

well, TRT of course. i can finish it in maybe 40 minutes?

day 19: the hardest game

SAW. if there weren’t walkthroughs for the nonograms and big fucking sudokus i would literally still be working on it. and i would never, ever solve any of it.

day 20: best quote

this one seems to be best quote again... so see above

day 21: game with best design

GTH, i think. gothic all the way. (yeah SEA has better graphics but that’s something else)

day 22: most shocking moment

when nikolai or whatever the fuck his name is died

day 23: scariest game

MHM made me cry when i was like 12? GTH jump scared me for sure. SAW has a beautiful tension to it... none of them really scare me anymore though. i am fucking thirty years old, after all

day 24: game with the best food

dear god it’s CUR. absolutely CUR. i, too, long to put some of that turkey in my pocket for later.

day 25: saddest moment

when MID actually did come out

day 26: favorite character arc

brady charmstrong. ok he’s a spineless git but i love him. he just wants his ponytail back!!

day 27: favorite memory playing

when my friend heather and i finally figured out how to get into the library in TRT. fucking massive for both of us. felt like the best, most perfect genius in the world. (it should be noted: i was, like, 10 or 11, and we were playing entirely without hints from online)

runner up is being drunk and switching between lounging, sexting, and playing SAW when i was like, maybe, 24? 

day 28: most touching game

no. this is not for me.

day 29: favorite character

professor hotchkiss. turns out i’m a really shitty diet version of her as an adult! wonderful

day 30: favorite game

right now it’s SAW! can’t get enough of that spooky soundtrack

[alfafilly]

Bird Boy Birb Fun

Stealin’ this questionnaire from @designraccoon and @extraneousdominomask​ but only to write it for Arpeggio because he’s the only one that matters TRUE FACT. Also @arpeggio-the-parrot is doing it too go look!!

Why I like them: I honestly am not sure. I currently adore him because I adored him as a kid and the nostalgia hit me hard. That sorta thing where you had a crush and you can’t deny the crush and the crush returns full force. But what I THINK I’m into about him, is the fact that he has potential as a villain. He’s physically non-threatening, but yet he is threatening. He caused all of the headache and horrible things in Sly 2. He turned his back on his entire gang because he was selfish. He probably had that plan for like... at least 2 years since Clockwerk originally died. He thought on that plan, dudes. He was a genius and he had SOME GAD-DAYUM BIRD BALLS to manipulate everyone and was so confident in himself that it was all gonna work. But he was also “human” in that he had flaws. He trusted Neyla and it backfired. And he was SHOCKED when it backfired. He was an overly confident ass up until he died, even if the last moment you could hear him realize he fukked up. All of this is evident in such a TINY ITTY BIT that we saw of him. That’s just. Kinda awesome. And it makes me love him as a character.

Also he’s got a nice suit and I have a suit kink STFU.

Why I don’t: Um. He’s an asshole. Like, his assholery is a great character point for him conceptually but if you wanted to be his friend uhhh you wouldn’t because he’s a pretentious prick.

Favorite episode: Jean Bison’s first level where we get to hear him on the phone in the cabin! That part is honestly the best scene to show his personality, and he’s not even physically present!

Favorite line: “Bison, you covetous troglodyte!”

Favorite outfit: The one I made for him which is just his outfit but it makes sense. Sorry not sorry.

OTP: Arpeggio x da Vinci. Ok, but for real I think Arpeggio is demi or ace so probably no one. But I did draw Arpeggio x Carmelita last week so that’s cool and completely backed up by absolutely nothing.

Brotp: Arpeggio and Jean Bison for realz. Except I know in my heart Arpeggio hates him. And. Well, Bison hates him too, we know this from one of his audio clips in the safehouse where he straight up says he would burn his lil bird body alive if he wasn’t so smart. Just. Imagine this fake friendship where they pretend to be bros but the entire time they go “oh god I hate you so much”. It’s great and relatable cause we all have one of those and if you don’t you’re lying.

Head Canon: Penelope was Arpeggio’s first apprentice but he dumped her in place of Neyla when he found her more “useful”. Penelope is honestly a perfect protege for him: they both love aviation, they both love inventing, they both love machines. They just have their own unique flairs to their crafts. But I think Arpeggio ran into Neyla and while she is not as good with machines or... anything, really, that would make her worthy of being his apprentice, Neyla probably put on an act and buttered him up and Arpeggio believed he could control her and make her do his every bidding. Penelope probably wouldn’t be able to do what Arpeggio wanted, not physically (running around on rooftops and being a snakey cop n all), she’s not intimidating (Neyla got a whip that’s scary and hot), and just generally Penelope was probably not as experienced with lying and manipulating as Neyla was at the time.

Second headcanon: Penelope helped Arpeggio design his blimp maybe really early on concept-wise and she stole his designs and sold them to Le Paradox because that skunky boy can’t be original and that blimp is totally an Arpeggio thing (she probably assumed he dead so whatever no backlash) am I wrong?!

Unpopular opinion: Arpeggio is actually ugly as shit in the game. Like. They did not know how to draw birds well. He’s got high AF red eyes. Why. The monocle is. WTF is that monocle that is a foggy piece of glass glued on his face, that’s stupid. He is not a bird he is an ugly as shit potato. Sorry bird boy I love you but you’re not gonna win the Neopets beauty pageant.

A wish: That we had gotten to battle him. I think his level/the last level was structurally pretty weak and could have been improved. Maybe quarter of the arc is just the gang trying to figure out where they had Clockwerk, maybe they can gradually find out/discover the BIG EBIL SCHEME on their own without a 10 minute dialogue dump, and then they try to stop the plan for a few missions, and THEN we can run into Arpeggio (maybe Neyla too idk) but you have to fight him in some sorta big machine. The bird boy can make a giant ass airship with hypno powers n shit, he probably was the one who fitted all the Klaww Gang’s Clockwerk parts, the man can easily build a freakin robot or something you can fight. Maybe he used Clockwerk’s design as inspiration in some of them idk. And only after you defeat him does NEYLA reveal herself to be a lil shit and go “lol I could help you bird boy but I’m not” so then Arpeggio dies not only beaten and weak by Cooper n Co but also his apprentice pulled the rug out from under him at his lowest point. Double heartbreak double dead birdboy. BAM hire me Sanzaru.

If Bowser Jr. can do it, Arpeggio can do it. Fight me, bro.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: I have SUCH FEAR he will reappear in the TV show and somehow be uglier than in the game. How is that possible I don’t know. If they make him look like a Rio bird I would be happy. If they just take a parrot and give it disturbing human eyes I would... Maybe be okay with it. If they made him a manbird I would be turned on I mean happiest! If they make him a Little Person then I’ll be super worried because I talked about my feels on that before and why I think that is an offensive and not-a-good choice for his motives. But if they can write it non-offensively then I would totally be into it!

TBH I would love a Neyla/Arpeggio wacky Team Rocket-style duo in the show. Reoccurring lil shits being shits. But that’s me being stupid.

5 words to best describe them: Suave lil bird; but dumb.

My nickname for them: Pedgy or Bird Boy. Even though Bird Boy has horrible second connotations I’ll explain one day.

[atleastputinsomeeffortinuroc]

Rant/Review: Ready Player One --aka-- Just Watch Wrinkle in Time Instead...

I don’t usually hate movies. 

I know that seems backwards considering that this blog is me complaining and ranting incoherently about movies I don’t like, but very few movies leave me seething. Even all of the Detective Conan movies, which are mostly terrible pieces of garbage, I don’t necessarily hate. Red Crimson Letters is a terrible waste of time and energy, but I wasn’t insulted or felt talked down to. It was just a really bad movie I wanted to talk about.

In my life, there have only been three movies who have truly enraged me. “Batman v Superman,” “Joy,” and “War for the Planet of the Apes.” 

Objectively, there are aspects that are genuinely good in all of them and are definitely better than I probably give them credit for...but I doubt it, but they just flare up an anger in me for one reason or another. They’re permanently on my “fuck that movie” list. And now…now there’s another entrant to that prestigious list.

Ready Player One.

My GOD. THIS was the book everyone’s been talking about? THIS is supposed to be the fucking bible of pop culture?! THIS MOVIE?! THE ONE THAT UNIRONICALLY HAS THE PHRASE SPOKEN BY HUMAN VOCAL CHORDS “FANBOYS ALWAYS KNOW A HATER?!!” ARE YOU GUYS--…ok. Ok, I need to calm down. 

There are several, several, SEVERAL parts about this movie that don’t work, and I could go into a lot of the problems, but instead I’m going to try to talk about three aspects of the film. And for the sake of me not swearing up and down, we’re not going to talk about that godawful dialogue. Just know that it sucks.)

1) The ham-fisted arc

2) The protagonist and his trophy waifu

3) References over content

There are spoilers ahead, and I’m going to write this with the assumption that you’ve already seen the movie. If you haven’t, you’ve been warned. Anywho, let’s get started. Put on some “a-ha,” break your nostalgia goggles and join me as we go down this road where I collectively shit over Spielberg’s attempt to adapt a supposed “beloved classic.” (CAN YOU TELL I’M MAD?!)

1)     The arc

Here’s the thing with arcs in narratives, and more specifically films. 

They need to feel earned. 

Your central character has gone through a life-altering change or point of view since the beginning of the film due to the adventures and trials had throughout the film. Good examples include “Mad Max: Fury Road” where Max finally lets others into his life and sees the value in not going through life alone as described by the part where he donates his own blood and tells Furiosa his name. Another good example is actually from the Oscar nominee Spielberg had LITERALLY LAST YEAR, “The Post.” In it, Kay Graham finally put her foot down and shows authority by stepping out of her comfort zone to release the Pentagon Papers—damn what the powers that be say. This is important to any narrative because it shows the flaws of your characters through their insecurities and hesitations to make them human rather than movie characters. Even if you have paragon characters like Superman, Wonder Woman, or Batman, they still have to overcome some kind of personal issue that is keeping them from achieving what they’ve wanted.

Now, if you look over to the main character, you can see that his arc was…what is it that was his arc? 

He’s…he’s the same at the beginning as he was at the end. 

“OH BUT HE HAS A PENTHOUSE AT THE END,” yeah that’s not a change. One could argue that the (even though the catalyst for change has no fucking relation to it) arc is about unplugging and enjoying the real world. The bits at the end with Easter Egg man where he starts going on and on and on about how he missed reality or something, and the VERY BRIEF bits at the beginning where you see people all over the VR systems, one of which is the mother neglecting a fire in the house and one where an Asian man almost commits suicide after losing all of his stuff in the game (it’s played for comedy, so THAT’S also pretty fun, because it’s not like Japanese suicide rates are a serious issue or anything OH WAIT.) So it’s about being close to reality and unplugging. Ok. Coolio.

But here’s the thing, similar to “War for the Planet of the Apes”…YOU HAVEN’T EARNED IT. There are brief moments where it kind of alludes to it (see the middle challenge with ‘oh yes, I should have kissed the girl during the Shining’ and the small bit at the middle where the main two are sitting there and the main dude has ONE HALF-ASSED LINE about how “it’s nice here. It’s slower,”) but that’s IT. It doesn’t actually give you a reason to think that staying in the Oasis and avoiding reality is a BAD thing. Sure you have abusive father obsessed with getting high scores but he’s just one dimensional asshole dad who dies and you don’t give a shit about it one second later after his parental figures are killed. 

There are no real CONSEQUENCES to spending too much time in the Oasis, it’s just because he’s good at the game. And if there are, they sure as hell aren’t focused on in favor of mindless spectacle (which looks REALLY BAD by the way. I know it’s supposed to look fake because video game, but do the main characters have to use the ugliest models in existence?!) As such, the ending and central arc of learning is lost.

So what’s the arc? Well…there is none. Nothing is really learned, nothing is really gained that MATTERS aside from the keys to Willy Wonka’s goddamn chocolate factory. 

Z or Perzival or Wade or generic-white-gamer-boy learns all of fucking NOTHING by the end. (As such, it makes the ending where he says “EVERYONE HAS TO BE OFF ON TUESDAYS AND THURSDAYS” come off as BULLshit.)

But no, this is clearly the Spielberg classic. It’s not like Indiana Jones learned anything in the Last Crusade as a character only he totally fucking DID, HE LEARNED TO RESPECT AND LOVE HIS FATHER WHO HE PREVIOUSLY DESPISED AND THE IMPORTANCE OF—sorry. Sorry I’m getting a bit mad again.

Anywho, due to a lack of a real arc, it makes you think that the entire fucking plot was pointless. It was just inevitable that the good guy win because…well he’s the main character. He doesn’t say anything about anything but is instead dumb fluff, which would be fine…but here’s the thing. It also affects the main characters. And it affects them HARD.

2)     Tweedledee and Tweedledumbass

The two main characters have no personality or character due to this lack of an arc.

The main man, Wade, his personality is…what exactly? He’s just generic hero-boy who is obsessed with the 80s. “He’s like a regular Star-Lord!” I hear you say, only he totally fucking isn’t. Starlord has baggage, has character has points and instances that stretch BEYOND just quoting 80’s movie and saying the actual phrase that a screenwriter actually wrote down and didn’t immediately delete that went “FANBOYS ALWAYS KNOW A HATER” NO I AM NOT OVER IT.

...Point is, the references don’t make Star-Lord who he is, it’s the character of Peter Quill himself. Cocky, brash, and in many ways, a child running from his past. 

As for Wade, he’s got nothing. I’ve looked over this sometimes, depending on the writing or the situation, so maybe it wouldn’t bother me so much, but the actor who plays him isn’t doing a good job. I know I don’t talk about acting a lot, but the man…the man is just whining through his lines. He comes off as insufferable with his needless 80’s knowledge that I was genuinely rooting for the one-dimensional villain to kill that fucking brat.

Then we have Artemis or Samantha or Sam or its-the-pixie-cut-rebel-chick.  

There are several scenes that are etched into my brain now (including a FUCKING NUT-SHOT AND A PASSWORD FOR A HUMAN ADULT THAT IS “B055MAN69.” IN A SPIELBERG MOVIE. THE MAN WHO MADE INDIANA JONES AND SCHINDLER’S LIST.), but one of the big ones is the final image of the film in which the main character in his 80’s man-boy cave spins around with his beautiful woman sitting in his lap as they suck face as the line “reality is pretty awesome anyway” or something like that. Aside from the main character not earning that statement as previously stated…fucking let’s look at it for what it is.

The man just won a real-life walking-talking waifu. A trophy wife that he wins at the end of the game.

She’s what probably made me see through the movie the most honestly. She makes this big fucking deal about “oh, but I’m not who you think I am on the outside, I’m not pretty” and then when you go outside to the real world, of course she’s the fucking gorgeous Hollywood white girl—she just has a goddamn birthmark on her eye to be her “blemish.”

“Oh but she’s insecure about it,” I hear you say--I’m sorry, but you mean to tell me NOBODY told her she’s fine and beautiful with the eye-mark BEFORE Wade? You mean to tell me she’s insecure, but not insecure enough to feel the need to buy fucking MAKE-UP!? I’m not saying that she needs it, I’m saying that the character’s central flaw is the WEAKEST FUCKIN FLAW I HAVE EVER SEEN. YOU WANNA CHANGE THE GAME, QUASIMODO THAT SHIT. 

THEN, and this part was just fucking HILARIOUS to me, she mentions about how the ioi company fucking KILLED HER FATHER in a workshop and she has to stop him for revenge…and then it’s totally dropped. Like it’s never mentioned by the end. At all. She chucks a grenade into Mechagodzilla to kill the bossman but fuck me if it ain’t satisfying and adds physically NOTHING to her character.

Her character exists for one purpose. She is the love interest who sets the main character off on his journey. Nothing more. And I say that, because SHE’S THE CATALYST FOR HIM FINDING THE FIRST KEY. She tells him something that reminds him of something that solves the puzzle. And what’s more, I am willing to bet that THAT’S the reason they kept her Hollywood pretty. Because you need to have an attractive romantic love interest to keep the audience pleased. 

Now apparently, she does more in the movie than she does in the book. And that’s great. That’s super. She’s the one breaking in to destroy the d20 of doom. Hell yeah I guess. But I also don’t care. You wanna know why? BECAUSE I AM NOT READING THE BOOK. Superficial changes that improve certain aspects doesn’t make the movie better than it is. It’s like polishing a fucking turd. Yeah, it’s nicer than what you had, but you are still making me hold this piece of dogshit.

They don’t have characters. They don’t have chemistry BECAUSE they don’t have characters. It’s a fucking wash.

3) Drowning in References

But now we talk about the big one. The big fucking thing that everyone and their mother is obsessing about this movie over. And the thing that has gotten me from not liking this movie to fucking DESPISING it.

The references.

To quote from people who will be seeing the movie in the theater *ahem*...

“OHMYGOD IS THAT TRACER?! OH AND IT’S HARLEY AND THE JOKER! OH! OH! OH! IRON GIANT! HALO! BORDERLANDS! BACK TO THE FUTURE! BATMAN—FUCKING IT’S THE BATMAN! THEY MENTIONED THRILLER! THAT’S PRINCE! STREET FIGHTER! MECHA-GODZILLA FIGHTING GUNDAM! MINECRAFT! NINJA TURTLES! FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH! STAR TREK! FIREFLY! THE SHINING! IT’S FUCKING CHUCKY!!!”

…Ok? So what?

Not to be a snob, but seriously—so what? Why does it matter?

Listen, I like crossovers too. I remember the Avengers and what a big goddamn deal it was, and how it made everyone’s jaw drop to the ground, and how in some ways, it still does. But whereas with those it felt organic, Ready Player One with its ninety thousand references felt…empty.

I’m going to bring out two comparisons to the table that do the same thing that Ready Player One did, “Who Framed Rodger Rabbit?” and “Wreck-It Ralph.” Both had pop-culture icons throughout them. One had all of the classic cartoons all spliced together—where you saw Daffy Duck and Donald Duck in the same shot having a dual piano-off. One of them had all of these video game characters that you loved and embraced since you were a kid, running around and hanging out ala “Toy Story.” These big names are all in the background, just like Ready Player One, but they’re clearly different in terms of execution. Why is that?

Well it’s because the movies weren’t reliant on them. Sure, Rodger Rabbit had fun moments with these big names, but if you took them out and animated totally new characters with similar personalities, what would you lose? Nothing. The plot is the same, the dynamics are the same, and it can still be seen as a salute to the classic animations from back in the day to also an allegory for the Jim Crowe era just as the book intentionally was. Same goes for Wreck-it Ralph, the character goes through a fundamental change that has him accepting who he is and how “there’s nobody else I’d rather be, than me” ALL THE WHILE paying respects to classic arcade video games.

The same can’t be said for Ready Player One. The instant you take away the pop-culture references, the movie loses its protective suit of armor to reveal it’s about…nothing. 

It is. 

Nothing. 

The generic quest, the generic corporate baddie, the generic love interest, the main character has nothing to say, and the conflict is revealed to be flat—nothing about it sticks out or makes an impression.

And if you fail to make an impression without a fucking suit pop-culture references then, well, if I may use a pop-culture quote myself...“If you’re nothing without the suit, then you shouldn’t have it.”

Plain and simple.

But then…there’s the one thing I can’t really debate. 

“It’s just fun though, right?”

Yeah sure. I’ll admit around that third act, even though it was long overdrawn, I had fun watching the violence and references I understood while they blasted “We’re Not Gonna Take It” in the background.

But y’know what? It was just about as enjoyable as seeing someone adapt a piece of shitty fanfiction, because both have one thing in common for everything that they do: It’s just there for fan service. If you make the statement “well the Oasis is cool,” then you’ve clearly missed the point because you don’t like the movie, you like it’s gimmick. And it’s gimmick exists—it’s called VR Chat.

Meanwhile, screenwriters of different backgrounds, ethnicities, genders and religions from everywhere across the world are actually putting EFFORT into their screenwriting and directing. And while their action scenes for their blockbuster idea may not be perfect, they at least tried and did something new with it.

I went to see “Wrinkle in Time” today after I’d seen Ready Player One yesterday, needing to see literally anything good. And yeah, it’s not perfect. It’s got some stilted dialogue and some questionable acting on nearly all fronts at points and the conflict can be about as cliched as you can imagine, but the visuals, the costume design—you could tell everyone cared and put a goddamn effort into everything put forth. It’s much more gorgeous than the downright UGLY CG that was in the Oasis world in Ready Player One, and I guarantee you nobody had the phrase “B055MAN69” anywhere. It didn’t pander to kids or guys who wanted to feel validated for knowing a couple references. It wanted to tell the story of fighting back evil and hatred by embracing love. It’s cheesy and sappy…but fuck me, if it didn’t try to say something while having fun.

But fuck that movie right? We have Iron Giant fighting Mechagodzilla. 

If you have that, then why bother putting in effort?

That’s what kills me. It’s lazy and people praise it because it just stuck pop-culture words in a fucking blender. Don’t call it innovative. Don’t call it original. Don’t call it anything than what it is.

80’s. Prepubescent. Fucking. Fanfiction.

You can love it and enjoy it if you want, I mean I don’t like not liking movies. It sucks. And in some aspects, I can see why you can if you turn your brain off but…I’m not gonna lie, to see this get away with murder insults me.

Listen, I love Spielberg. There is nobody I respect more in the business. His work in AI, and the reason why he did so to keep a dying friend’s vision alive will always keep him as one of my personal heroes but…sometimes you gotta call people out when they make shit. And I am.

I don’t care what anyone says, don’t see Ready Player One. Watch something worthwhile. Go to Netflix and watch “Stranger Things” if you’ve got that need for an 80′s kick, or hell--”Blade Runner 2049″ is a visual goddamn MARVEL. Go see “The Post” or “Jaws” if you want some good Spielberg. Just PLEASE! Go see something that isn’t just a bunch of references that almost feel as though it’s a remake of “ctrl+alt+del.” 

(Random aside, people have told me to read the original book...but if that fucking thing is ANYTHING like this movie, I’d rather BURN IT than let it get one inch into my house. So no, I’m not going to read the book even if there are claims that it’s “better.” (Even though I believe that it’s impossible to say a book is better than it’s adaptation or vice versa because it’s two different mediums and as such it’s hardly fair, but that’s a whole other thing.) Point is, I’ve never been more turned off to a book in my godddamned life and I ain’t gonna bother.)

[askullinajar]

The Shattered Frame (Part 3/7)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

Fic info: this is a sequel to my previous fic, The Living Ghost so go read that or this won’t make sense. Rating: General. Pairings: Lucy/Lockwood, Holly/Rani. Ao3 link: here.

A cluster of hauntings in a decrepit manor and the dripping spectre of a woman dressed all in black hits a little too close to home for Lockwood & Co’s newest member.

Part 3 – Road trip

There was a brief argument between Kipps and Lockwood over whether the oldest or the tallest got to sit in the front seat. Kipps won out in the end, after pointing out that, if Lockwood sat in the front, he wouldn’t get to sit next to me. He flushed at that but made no further objections. No one pointed out that Skully was, in fact, both the oldest (if you counted his years spent as a ghost) and the same height as Lockwood, though that was easy to forget because he slouched so much. He didn’t seem to care, though, and slid into the back seat with me and Lockwood, leaving the third row for George – his own fault for being the last ready. I got stuck in the middle – a disadvantage of being the shortest out of the three of us. It was either that or sit next to George in the back, and he had a tendency to fall asleep on whoever was sitting next to him and drool, something I’d discovered on many a taxi ride home after a case.

Skully kicked the back of Kipps’s seat repeatedly while we waited for Holly to say her goodbyes to Rani, either to be annoying or because he was already feeling restless; he got tetchy in small spaces, something I put down to his many years stuck in a jar.

“If I have to put up with this for the whole ride, Lockwood can have the front,” Kipps huffed.

“Oh, hold on,” said Lockwood, suddenly. “George, pass my bag from the boot.”

George handed over Lockwood’s bag and he proceeded to fish something out of the front pocket and pass it to Skully. “I used to have trouble focusing when I was younger, and my sister bought me a bunch of stuff like this. Now I just practice with my rapier instead, so you can have them if you like.”

Skully inspected the object – a line of interlocking pyramids that could be twisted to contort the toy into different shapes. Skully eyed Lockwood contemplatively for a moment. “Thanks, A.J,” he said at last.

“Call it an early birthday present,” said Lockwood, giving Skully a warm smile. He said nothing about the new nickname; I guess it wasn’t as bad as ‘big A’.

Skully seemed content fiddling with the toy for now; he relaxed back into his seat and stopped kicking Kipps’s chair. I shot Lockwood a grateful smile.

We watched Holly hug Rani one last time.

“Stay safe, okay?” Rani was saying. “Call me when you arrive.”

“Come on, Hol!” George called. “We’ve gotta get there before it gets dark.”

A little reluctantly, Holly pulled away from Rani’s embrace and climbed into the driver’s seat. Rani waved us off as the car pulled out into the road. I watched her go.

“George,” I said, “why did so many agencies fail at clearing this place?”

George cleared his throat. “Oh, you know, ran into some trouble, that’s all. Not as competent as we are.”

“So, they gave up and left?”

“Something like that.”

I had a feeling that meant they gave up living, but I said no more about it; I hated the thought of this case enough already.

“How long until we get there?” Lockwood asked.

“Four, maybe five hours,” Holly replied. “Give or take.”

Skully let out a long groan.

“Don’t be like that,” said Kipps, “now you get to experience the joy of car games.”

“For example,” I said, and punched Skully in the arm.

“Owww! What was that for?” Skully whined.

“Yellow car,” I said, pointing it out.

“You’re just supposed to say yellow car,” said Holly

“That’s not how my sisters and I played it– Ow!”

“Yellow car!” Skully announced, grinning. “You know what? I like this game!”

“Can we play something a little less violent?” said Holly, hopefully. “Like I Spy?”

“I Spy is for losers,” said George, reaching forwards and punching Lockwood’s shoulder. “Yellow car!”

“Or the Alphabet game,” Kipps suggested.

The car turned a corner, the momentum forcing us the lean sideways. Skully lurched into my side so I wound up squished between him and Lockwood.

“Hey!”

“Oops!”

“That’s also a loser game,” said George. “Let’s play truth or dare.”

The car turned another corner. Lockwood grinned at me before shoving me into Skully who collided with the door.

“Boys!” Holly warned.

“You can’t play truth or dare in a car,” Kipps argued.

“You can play the truth bits!”

“Then it’s just ‘truth’!”

A roundabout came into view. I stuck out both elbows so the boys either side of me wouldn’t be tempted to squish me again.

“Fine, we’ll play truth! Skully, how did you die?”

“George! Don’t be rude!” Holly scolded as I shot a dirty look towards the back seat.

“I was beheaded for several accounts of murder,” Skully replied with an even tone.

“They hanged people in those days, they didn’t behead them,” George said, scowling at him. “How’d you really die, Jimothy?”

Skully flicked a window cover at him, which unfolded in mid-air and smacked him in the face, knocking his glasses off.

“I swear, if you lot don’t behave, I am turning this car around!” Holly threatened.

We settled into a game of I Spy after that.

Two and a half hours later, we stopped for lunch and a toilet break. We sat on the hood of the car and ate the sandwiches Rani had made for our trip. Holly yawned into her hand.

“Why don’t you let me drive for the last stretch, Hol,” Kipps offered.

“Oh, no, no, no,” Holly said. “You’re not insured on it. If we get pulled over…”

“No one’s going to pull us over,” Kipps insisted. “I have never been pulled over in my life.”

Holly surrendered after a little while and let Kipps take the driver’s seat; I think she was exhausted from having to deal with the rest of us for over two hours.

The drive went on without problems for a little while; Holly was fast asleep, George was snoring in the back, Skully was dozing against the window…

We got pulled over.

The policeman tapped on the driver’s side window and, on the edge of my vision, I saw Skully open one eye.

Kipps rolled down the window. “Is there a problem, officer?” he said, smiling tightly.

“Routine check. We’ve had a few car robberies ‘round here. Can I see your license?”

“Yep! One sec!”

As Kipps turned towards the glove compartment, he exchanged a frantic look with me that clearly said he did not have his licence on him.

To bide time while we tried to think up excuses, he shuffled through the items in the glove compartment. “Should be in here, just one sec. Not like it’s not my car or anything! Ha-ha.”

The policeman raised an eyebrow. I mentally face-palmed.

“Sir, I’m going to need you to…”

Then something happened. The officer paled. He swallowed, thickly, and took a step back. “Um… y-you know what? It’s fine. You all look like nice kids, anyway… and I really should get going. Don’t worry about it! I’ll just…” He seemed all too keen to get back to his car, tripping over his feet before he scrambled into the driver’s seat and slammed the door to drive away.

“Strange,” said Lockwood as Kipps breathed a sigh of relief.

Skully closed his eyes again. I eyed him curiously.

“What did you do?”

“I don’t know why you’re assuming I did anything,” said Skully, without opening his eyes. “Maybe he just has an aversion to gingers.”

“Hey!” Kipps protested.

I hummed, unconvinced; the cop’s reaction had looked suspiciously like Creeping Fear, but the sun was still shining, and I definitely hadn’t felt the presence of any Visitors. I wondered how many ghostly powers my friend still possessed.

Holly had remained fast asleep for the whole encounter, so Kipps continued driving. I propped my head against Lockwood’s shoulder, watching the cars pass by, imagining stories for each of the passengers. The radio played an old song my dad used to have on records before he died. I didn’t have many good memories of him, but the song still gave me a strange sense of nostalgia.

Lockwood’s jumper was soft against my cheek, and it smelled of clean laundry and fresh tea bags and home. I snuggled closer and closed my eyes.

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I remember, Lockwood’s arm was around me, Holly was back in the driver’s seat, and George and Kipps were arguing.

“We should’ve gone right back there.”

“No, the map clearly says that would have taken us away from the sea. We want to go towards the sea.”

“It’ll loop back around!”

Next to me, Skully had also been woken up and was agitatedly fidgeting with the toy again.

“Lemme see the map,” George insisted.

“I’m in the front seat, therefore, I have map privileges,” Kipps retorted.

“But if we don’t get there before nightfall, they won’t let us in!”

“Maybe I should ask someone for directions,” Holly suggested.

“No!” both boys shouted at once before going back to arguing. Holly and I exchanged eye contact in the rear-view mirror. Boys.

Eventually, Skully seemed to have had enough. He snapped his fingers and the map flew out of Kipps’s hands and into his.

“Oi!”

“Oh, come on!” said George. “Can you even read?”

Skully shot him a deadly look before scrutinizing the map, occasionally glancing out of the window at our surroundings. “Ok, go left here and then right and we’ll be on the…” He squinted at the map. “The promen…”

George scoffed.

“The promenade,” I supplied, scowling at George.

Holly followed his directions and, sure enough, we found ourselves right outside the hotel where we’d be staying for the night, with plenty of time to spare before nightfall.

It was certainly a change from the Inns we usually stayed at, though I wasn’t sure I liked it. It just seemed too… clean. Less homely. Holly, Kipps, and Lockwood seemed right at home, though.

We were shown to our rooms by a woman with a thick northern accent that only I was able to understand, and split off into twos: Kipps with Holly, George with Lockwood, and me with Skully, mostly because I couldn’t trust him not to murder anyone else.

I claimed the bed by the window by dumping my bags on it. Skully immediately began jumping on his bed and scoffed down both our pillow mints.

I stared out of the window, which overlooked the beach. The tide was way out, blending into the sky on the horizon. Despite the season, a few children still ran around on the sand with their parents standing nearby. Perhaps it was half term.

“Have you ever been to the seaside before?” I asked Skully, who was now rifling through the complimentary toiletries in the en-suite.

“Snuck on a train to Brighton with my sister, once,” he replied. “Got kicked off before we got there, though.”

“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I said.

“I had 5. And 6 brothers.”

I whistled. “Your parents must have had a fun time handling you all.”

“They didn’t have to deal with us for long.”

I frowned at Skully’s reflection in the window. Did his siblings die? Did his parents? I realised Skully had been rather lucky to live to adulthood back in those days; from what I remembered from books and primary school history, many barely lived half as long.

I was about to ask him more questions about his family when there was a knock on the door and Lockwood entered. “Fancy a walk before it gets too dark, Luce?”

I glanced at Skully; he seemed pretty content sniffing shower gels for now.

“I’ll be back later,” I told him.

He raised an eyebrow and looked meaningfully between me and Lockwood. “Sure.”

I ignored that and grabbed my coat before following Lockwood out. As I was about to close the door, Skully yelled after us. “Don’t get sand in your knickers!”

I slammed the door on him. My face burned. Lockwood cleared his throat. “Right… uh… shall we go?”

The wind was bitterly cold, and it whipped against our faces and blasted our hair in all directions. We held hands, shoved in Lockwood’s coat pocket for warmth, and walked, pressed up against each other, along the wall overlooking the beach. The sand was rippled from waves, and vast puddles of seawater were dotted around alongside the crumbling remains of children’s sand castles. Seagulls hollered as they soared overhead, swooping down to inspect discarded food wrappers, squawking as they battled each other for fallen chips.

Despite the cold, the fresh ocean air was a nice change from the polluted streets of London, and we walked silently for a while, breathing it in. There was no knowing whether we’d get another chance to stroll along beside the beach, listening to the crash of waves in the distance; tomorrow would be spent inside a haunted house, and whether we’d want to stay by the seaside after that ordeal was a mystery for now.

On our other side, shops bustled with the last dregs of customers. In London, the streets would be bare by now; everyone would already be safely locked away indoors, long before darkness fell.  But I knew from experience that the north of England wasn’t as teeming with ghosts as the south. Fewer dangerous type twos, anyway. It was one of the reasons my previous team had let their guards down that night at the windmill.

I eyed the line of shops and checked the watch on my wrist. Half an hour before they all closed; enough time to do a little shopping and maybe grab some fish and chips to take back to the others.

I squeezed Lockwood’s hand and changed our course towards one of the shops. He raised an eyebrow at me; I wasn’t usually one for shopping, but this time I had something in mind.

We returned to the hotel room a few shopping bags heavier. Most of them were filled with fish and chips – and a pasta salad for Holly – which I took into mine and Skully’s room while Lockwood went to hide the other bag amongst his luggage. Then the rest of Lockwood and Co joined us and we lounged, split into two groups between the twin beds, and stuffed ourselves with all the salty, vinegary – and pasta-y, in Holly’s case – goodness. We needed the energy, after all. We were in for a big day tomorrow.

Previous Next

[cosmosogler]

i got just about everything done that needed to be done today. i need to check if i’m actually registered for specific classes yet or not and continue with ongoing studies but other than that i got a lot done.

first thing i did was get up at 9:20, which is just a bit earlier than i’ve been getting up lately. tonight i’m gonna try for bed at 11:30 to see about getting up at 8 or 8:15. right now it’s 10:35 so i’m in the clear for now.

gotta let dad know i will be accompanying eve to the vet on friday.

i showered and got the final bandages off. my bellybutton actually only has a tiny cut. not into it, but around the inside in a semi-circle. there wasn’t any extra blood or anything, it’s all closed nicely. i’m guessing there’s just a lot of blood flow through that area of your body and that’s why the bandages looked a lot more severe. i even scrubbed off ALMOST all the residue at long last. there’s a little bit left around a scab i didn’t want to irritate too much. my stomach finally looks like i was lightly injured instead of operated on. taking off the tape helped a lot honestly. none of the incisions look like they will leave a noticeable scar.

modern medicine really is impressive. when my gramma had her gallbladder out just 10 years ago or so it left a definite mark along her side.

anyway after that i looked up a lot of finance stuff and compiled a list of resources to review again later. stuff explaining, like, what investment is and how it works and why it’s preferable to just putting everything in a savings account. and what a retirement fund looks like and the differences between all the varieties. i think i am going to have to actually have someone at the bank sit me down and explain how my accounts work though. and maybe how to tone down mom’s control over my finances. definitely want to do that BEFORE i leave, as there is no open branch in gainesville.

looks like i could even bring mom along on saturday if we need, like, negotiations or something. i’ll keep looking into it.

then i went to the grocery store and got some tortilla chips, and some dog treats since you get a dollar off (which is like 20%!) if you got a membership. i got the old favorite, bacon and blueberry. i’m gonna start giving them to the dogs after eve’s surgery. i’m hoping cookies will lift her mood.

then i ate an entire bowl full of sharon’s salsa and also heated up some leftover pizza. i was really full afterward but i’m glad i didn’t overdo it with the salsa. i didn’t actually fill up the entire bowl until it overflowed. i only reasonably filled it.

the pizza made me SUPER sick afterward. i spent a while listening to music while i looked at the rest of my finance resource tabs. then i downloaded an app that tracks how long you spend each day working on individual long-term projects and helps you pace yourself with timers and scheduled breaks and stuff. i even coughed up the five dollars for no ads. 

i spent an hour giving it a try! i added a few projects to work on over the next week, and stuff i thought would probably be important to keep up with at school like “study physics.” for now i just timed myself organizing some bookmarks. it was nice actually. i got all my folders where i want them, i cleared out my “general” tab into the appropriate folders, and i started going through one of the larger folders looking for dead links or things that were sorted incorrectly back when i made the folder like five years ago.

the hope is that if i streamline my folders enough i will be encouraged to actually look in them sometimes? at least my music folder is looking fantastic. i’ve got it sorted into genre and a subfolder for things i would like to buy when i have money for it.

i hope i can make good use of this app. it seems promising so far.

then i took care of some ufl orientation stuff and a survey i found in my email. and i signed and sent off some paperwork. then i went to dinner with gramma and grampa, my brother, and the cousins. this time my brother did invite my sister but she stayed home because she and mom wanted to go to the movies. (mom flaked out on the movie. but gramma is going with her tomorrow.)

i ordered a veggie burger, and the waitress wrote it down and read it back to me correctly, but when i got my food i took a bite out of the burger and got a mouthful of Double Beef Patty. 

i always feel like i’m put in a complicated situation when this happens. and it does happen a lot. like, on one hand, i really don’t want to eat meat! and i am very out of practice with digesting meat! and now i am even more unable to digest it due to the gallbladder thing!! but on the other hand, not eating the meat isn’t going to bring the animal back to life. it feels like if i refuse to eat it the animal died for nothing. no one else is going to eat it now that it’s on my plate sitting in front of me. 

i felt bad because i really did get sick. i wanted to avoid too much more fat because of the pizza for lunch. veggie burgers are usually pretty good about that, and i got a side salad instead of fries or anything. i dunno. the waitress was nice about it and it wasn’t her fault. i hope that didn’t affect the tip grampa gave her. mom said he tips badly in general anyway though.

after that we went back to gramma’s house and i had another klondike bar and played “village idiot” with my brother and austin and thomas. i lost only once out of the four rounds even with austin very carefully explaining each turn of the game to me constantly and telling me my options when my cards were face up. i teased him about it after the first round and he let me just play. i did get a lot better at it after the second round though.

thomas did the “kill yourself” thing again but it seemed to be more that he was very enthusiastic about the game and it had become his go-to phrase at some point before the first time he told me that.

after the game my brother and thomas and i were screwing around on austin’s computer. my brother knew most of his social circle so we were just goofing off on discord.

then my brother and i came across a channel where austin had posted pictures of my sister (taken from screenshots of her snap chat a few months ago) and had received some very... inappropriate comments on her appearance. i asked who the guy was and his age and he apparently is older than even me. that made me REALLY upset. when austin got back my brother looked at him and was all “what the hell is this?” and i told him not to show them pictures of us any more. he seemed confused? but he also said “ok.” 

i talked it over with asher when grampa was driving me and my brother home. asher was real nice about it at least. when we got home i took wiley on another lap around the neighborhood in 100-degree heat, and then i told my sister what happened. she thanked me for telling her and said i did everything i could already. 

it was actually kind of nice that she thanked me for once. i usually get a response more along the lines of “o....k....????” when i try to talk with my sister. or “that’s just how she is” when i talk about mom. i recognize that my sister has a very different (but just as complicated and stressful) relationship with my mother than i do.

what did i do after that... it looks like i just checked some comics and watched an episode of nostalgia critic and folding ideas. and watched another physics video. i’m kind of relieved that it’s coming back to me fairly easily. i’ll try to keep up with it tomorrow. tomorrow evening we are entertaining jamey and her kids (part 2!) it looks like the oldest one just got pokemon moon so i can finally give her the espeon i spent that one evening training up haha. hopefully in exchange for transferring all her pokemon up to the new game she will help me evolve my machoke. 

i’m a little nervous about how much i should really... talk to her or ask her about herself. she’s ten years younger than me. like what’s polite and what’s too much? will she think i’m being patronizing if i start explaining too much about pokemon or whatever? should i ask what kinds of tv shows she likes? would it be weird if we talked about steven universe or something?

i know i was just a kid a few years ago but i already don’t remember how they work. this is weird. i seem to remember telling myself i would never not understand someone my age but i don’t remember when that was. probably when i was like nine. i have a lot of “shower thoughts” style wisdom chunks to impart on a younger generation but i always figured it would be, like, my brother’s kids at some point in the far future. 

god. i’m babysitting my old babysitter’s kids. i want to treat them with the respect i would give an adult but at the same time there is a difference in how kids work compared to adults. i don’t know where i’d be overestimating or underestimating. underestimating kids is insulting to them, of course, i remember that, but i feel like overestimating is a lot more... stressful and dangerous.

i guess i’ll figure it out as i go. 

i’m worried about eve... she seems like she’s about ready to give up. she just seems so exhausted when i come over to pet her. she barely lifts her head. she doesn’t greet me at the door since she doesn’t spend time with the other dogs when i’m not home. so she doesn’t hear the front door open or close.

i need her to hang on for just one more day. i wish i could tell her that. one day before she can exchange this problem for a set of less insurmountable problems. i really hope that the amputation is helpful for her. even if she only lives a couple more months, if she’s able to “live” again, it will have been worth it. by “live” i mean stuff like getting around when she wants to. eating. wagging her tail. thinking a little more clearly. not being irritable and frustrated and confused all the time.

she’s sleeping right now. at least it passes the time i guess. i still get the feeling that she’s the one taking care of me instead of the other way around. i check on her a lot but when she’s not sleeping she’s usually watching me. she almost never leaves the room i’m in and almost always follows me as soon as i leave. she has gotten better at “stay, i will be right back” at least. i wish there was more i could do for her right now. 

[cookinguptales]

It was so hard to pick out of 75 questions so I hope this is ok 😬💦 2, 13, 18, 19, 25, 28, 29, 30, 33, 39, 42, 46, 47, 54, 58, 67, 71 (Doesn't have to be the romantic kind), 73, and 75

Oh wow, jeez. haha. OKAY I’mma do it, but I’mma put it under a cut bc this can only be long.

2. Who is your hero?

You know, I feel like I learn about amazing people all the time?? There are so many people in history who have done so many cool things. I love the information age we live in where we can here about heroes every damn day. But if I had to pick one that means a lot to me specifically, possibly Helen Keller. Like sure she did the whole learning to talk while blind/deaf thing, but she also became a hardcore social activist! If you read her writings, she was not even in the vicinity of fucking around, and I’m here for that.

13. What is your favorite book to read?

Hmm. My comfort read used to be Howl’s Moving Castle, but I haven’t read it in years. That’s...a bummer... Maybe I should reread it soon.

18. If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

Hmm... I mean, if we’re talking on like a magical level, then a pain-free, exhaustion-free day would be swell. I’d be happy doing just about anything. If you mean in a more normal way, then I think I’d be happiest traveling somewhere really cool with a friend and having a nice meal and seeing beautiful sights.

19. What is your favorite game or sport to watch and play?

Hmm. I mean, I don’t play/watch sports that often. Disability and all. But I used to do tae kwon do and karate fairly regularly, and I really enjoyed that. I usually really only watch games/sports during the Olympics, but I enjoy speed skating, figure skating, gymnastics, archery, women’s weight lifting... Um... I watch the Super Bowl for the commercials? lol. Honestly, my favorite part of watching sports is watching the winners cry haha. That’s why I like the Olympics best.

25. Who is your favorite author?

Probably either Diana Wynne Jones or Neil Gaiman. I’ve read a lot of books by a lot of authors that I’ve liked (and admittedly both of them have some stuff in their work that makes me raise my eyebrows now) but I feel like both of them really shaped me from a young age. I was devastated when DWJ died.

28. In the evening, would you rather play a game, visit a relative, watch a movie, or read?

Most of my reading energy is taken up by school stuff now, but hopefully I’ll start to get to read again come graduation. In the meantime, I like to watch movies best. I livetweet them a lot haha.

29. Would you rather vacation in Hawaii or Alaska, and why?

WELL I have actually gone to Alaska before! I really liked it, honestly. It was beautiful up there. And nice and cold! Which is good for the POTS, haha. But I think if I had to choose a future vacation I’d choose Hawaii just because I’ve never been there! And there are some shrines I’d love to visit.

30. Would you rather win the lottery or work at the perfect job? And why?I mean... The job I’d really like to do now certainly wouldn’t pay as much as the lottery, but it’d keep me comfortable. I mean. I guess it’d be great to win the lottery so I wouldn’t have to worry about working (which, as a PWD, can be...stressful) but not to put too fine a point on it, my current living situation is one where I don’t need to worry too much about money. I’m incredibly lucky on that front, I know. If I were as poor as I was about ten years ago, this would be a much easier choice. XD Though research does show that a lot of people who win the lottery end up getting fucked over by taxes, friends, etc. so. maybe not.

33. If you could go back in time, what year would you travel to?

I MEAN... I’m a gay, disabled woman. Going back in time probably wouldn’t be great for me, haha. But I guess I’d love to hear some of the old jazz musicians I love play live...

39. List two pet peeves.

Motherfucking DISCREET and DISCRETE which are TWO DISCRETE WORDS. There was a moment once when someone tried to assure me that “discrete” was just the British spelling and I just. I JUST!! Like if I were in the Cell Block Tango, that would probably be my prison origin story. I also hate it when strangers ask about my cane/disability.

42. If you were a super-hero, what powers would you have?

uhhhhhHHHhhhh teleportation powers which I would mostly use to get to class on time but also maybe catching babies when they fall out windows or whatever. That happens, right?

46. If you could go back in time to change one thing, what would it be?

Geez. I mean, on a big scale? Like Hitler? Bro, don’t put that much pressure on me!!! If you just mean in my own life, I’d probably just tell little!me what POTS is haha. If I have to change like. A personal decision?? I might have decided to do a different program while I was in Japan. It was very expensive (through my school) and I didn’t get to do a lot of the things I really wanted to do.

47. If you could share a meal with any 4 individuals, living or dead, who would they be?

HONESTLY, a lot of the major heads of religion. Like. I just think it’d be so interesting to talk to them about philosophy and what they’d think about where their religions are at now. Like even if you don’t believe in the religions, people generally believe that people like Jesus, Mohammad, Siddhartha Gautama, etc. lived.

54. What's your favorite holiday?

HALLOWEEN, BY A COUNTRY MILE!!! I love Halloween! Lots of great spooky stuff and yummy treats and fun parties. I love Halloween SO MUCH.

58. What's your favorite type of foreign food?

I LIKE A LOT OF THINGS... In Japan, I think I loved curry and takoyaki and onigiri best. Some of the octopus and lemon chicken/soup/etc. in Greece was delicious. I loved like ALL the food I had in Barcelona. Tomato bread and jamon iberico and olives and everything was just high quality and delicious?? We just ate our way around La Boqueria (a giant market) one day and I loved it. I like poutine from Canada and pasties from the UK and basically anything cooked in red wine from France. haha. I’ve only had Thai food and Moroccan food in the US (so who knows if it’s accurate) but I love massaman curry and bastilla and Moroccan lemon chicken. I am a big fan of sweet and savory meat dishes, haha. Oh, and Afghan Palow!! Delicious.

I PROMISE I ALSO EAT FRUITS AND VEGGIES... I also like lots of international alcohols haha. Ouzo and absinthe (taste similar), champagne/prosecco/cava (cava was SO CHEAP in barcelona, rip), sake (especially nigori sake)...

67. What is your favorite childhood memory?

Jeez, that’s a hard one. I feel a certain nostalgia for the natural vibe from where I lived as a kid. (In other words, the people and buildings and stuff were fine, but I feel nostalgic for the natural phenomena.) Like the smell of fresh soil and the sound of the woods and rustling fields of corn. But like a specific memory... Long before we moved to FL, my parents did surprise us with a trip to Disney World when I was about 8! We were visiting a Floridian friend (who we later moved in with when we lost our house) and driving down and thennnn my dad “made a wrong turn” and checked us into the Wilderness Lodge just outside the Magic Kingdom. We drove up like RIGHT as the fireworks started over at MK so my sister and I were kind of in shock haha. It was really fun.

71. What's the craziest thing you’ve done in the name of love?

I WENT TO THE MUSICAL CATS. I kid, Loo. (Mostly.) I’m not really the kind to do big OTT things for love, but I think I am the kind to hurt myself for it, unfortunately. I loved a girl for a long, long time, and in retrospect, I realize that I allowed her to devalue me in ways that I’m still trying to undo. We were never together or anything -- I have a habit of falling for straight girls -- but boy did I get fucked up. Like...viewing this through my current lens, I can’t believe I let that go on for so long. It was crazy. There are a lot of reasons why I believed I was lesser and unlovable because of my disability, and I realize now that some of that started with her and another friend of mine. I just kind of wished that I’d figured that out before they ditched me for good and told me it was because I always “made everything complicated”. (I’d been late to a get-together because I was at the doctor...) I...cried a lot. haha. But I ended up becoming closer to my best friends today as a result, and learning a lot about myself. So I guess maybe it was for the best, even if it hurt at the time.

OH I’VE ALSO GOTTEN IN FIGHTS FOR LOVE but that was more for friends. I’d kick anyone’s ass in high school, or if we weren’t in an avenue where I could do that, I’d yell a lot or say stuff that was just, ah, really cutting. haha. I have...a protective streak. And I was frustrated about a lot in high school. Our school had martial arts classes, which was a good outlet. I was known as someone who could, uh, get things done. Um.

73. What was your favorite subject in school?

Uhhh. If we’re just talking high school, maybe math?? English if I had a really good English teacher. I love reading/writing. But math was comforting, in a way. Math is very solid. I also enjoyed French. And I enjoyed a lot of fibercraft techniques in that class, but hated the teacher. Womp womp. I liked making things with my hands. I found batik particularly comforting.

75. Do you collect anything?

I collect tarot decks! I’ve studied the history of tarot before, and I’m always really fascinated with the way that people attach meaning to mundane objects. I kind of love how tarot was basically just playing cards for rich people until a series of weird events and people started using them for divination. Now people rarely use them for anything else. That kind of applied religious/personal meaning is super interesting to me. PLUS a lot of them are very pretty. Haha.

[libgds]

I have been to three MLB games in my life. Two were White Sox vs. Yankees when I was a kid and what I remember is taking home a kitten we found at a rest stop. His name was Yankee, and he was a good kitty. I know there was a third as part of a school trip in middle or high school, but it made not impression. I do not even remember who I saw. I did know it was not a Cubs game. I was a Wrigley Field virgin and Andy had chosen me to go to the last game of the season against the St. Louis Cardinals.

I knew from all his texts, tweets, and Instagram pics during games (@44_for_tony_wood) that Cubs gear was a must. I brought a red bandana for my hair and my red Converse, then I asked to borrow a shirt. Andy brought down what he described as the first stack in one drawer. I had at least six to choose from and I had the suspicoun that he had enough still in his room to cloth a small village.

Since it was the last home game of the season  and rain was in the forecast (plus, why not?), Andy decided we should get a hotel room close to Wrigley. IF there were rain delays, we would not have to worry about catching the train back late. Plus, whether we ended up celebrating or drowning our sorrows we could not have to worry about driving back to Indiana.

The reason this was on the list was that Andy and Tony had attended this game last year. Baseball was a huge bond for them and much of their family. It also marked the end of a season that had started with the Best and Worst Day of Andy’s life. (Seriously, those need capitalization. Fight me, grammar Nazis.) During Spring Training in Mesa, Arizona Andy and Tony rented a place to watch their beloved Cubs kick off the year. Tony lived in California, so these times together were special and both of them are the type of men to suck the marrow out of every moment. The first day, they had a blast and went out on the town. They did not leave anywhere a stranger.  Tony declared it the Best Day.

The next morning, Andy found him collapsed on the floor. He had died in the night of a heart attack. Andy then had to take care of arrangements, let his sister-in-law know she is a widow, and tell his mother that she had lost her oldest son only about a year after their father had died. Tony was only 54 years old.

I still do not know how Andy is still standing.

Andy decided to dedicate this year to remembering Tony and sharing his legacy. Tony had a thing for the numbest 44. It’s the number his two sons wore when they each won a State Championship in Football. He liked Tony Rizzo, number 44, on the Cubs. Since Andy was also turning 44 this year, he made a list of 44 places and memories he had of Tony and asked others to experience them with him and listen to Tony’s story and impact.

Andy asked me to complete number 8, the final home game of the Cubs season. The final page of a season that had started with so much joy that in a night turned into a tragedy.

Andy has a solid game day routine. He drives to Chinatown and parks in the fenced lot below the Redline train. He takes it to Wrigley and times his arrival for when they start serving beer at noon. He watches fora bit around left field and then goes an d finds his seats. Maybe he sits there and maybe he goes somewhere better. At eh 7th inning stretch, he dons his beard and records singing with whomever has attended the game with him.  At the end of the game, he goes to his favorite haunts in Wrigleyville either to celebrate or complain with the rest of Chicago.

Now the routine was going to be a bit different since we got a hotel It was a boutique hotel called The Wheelhouse Hotel.  It was really fun and they embraced the baseball theme in a fun and classy way. More hipster than sports bar. Our room’s mini bar included beef jerky, peanuts, cracker jack, and my favorite, Big League Chew bubble gum. Instead of mints, they left packs of Wrigley Doublemint gum on the pillows.

Now some of my more conservative readers may be thinking, wait a second, an unmarried man and woman in a room together? What exactly are the sleeping arrangements?

No need to clutch your pearls, our room had bunkbeds.  No seriously, bunkbeds.

See. I told you.

We had a wonderful lunch on the patio. I had a classic bacon cheeseburger and Andy had a fried bologna sandwich that somehow still managed to look pretentious.  Gotta love hipsters.

We headed to the stadium and Andy had a million stories for every nook and cranny of the place. We did laps and he would have a different story each time. When it finally got close to game time, we headed up to stand behind left field. I started to get a bit worried at this point. Normally, when people stand instead of going to their seats it is because where they are standing is better. Well, with my eyesight I could not see the ball at all. It was like watching a weird Youtube video where the object everyone is playing with is photoshopped out. A few times, I thought I heard the ball getting hit, but it turned out the pitch was so hard that I was hearing it hit the catcher’s mitt. Ouch.

After an inning or two, Andy decided to go to our seats. Technically, I guises I should say we went to where we were going to sit. It was a day where it kept spitting rain, the Cubs had put themselves in the position to have to win every game left to go to the Playoffs, and they were plagued with injuries, so we had some choices in where we sat. We ended up under the roof on the first deck on the first base line and hey, I could see the ball! The game is much more interesting when you can see where the ball is. The Cubs led the Cards 2 to 1 as I experienced my first 7th inning stretch at Wrigley. 

It was all going fine and dandy until the top of the 9th when the Cubs fell apart. TheCards pulled ahead 2 to 3 and the Cubs only managed a single to end the game. My first Cubs game was the full experience in the Cubs fan tradition of dashed hopes and crushing disappointment. Andy modified his W flag to a WTF flag and flew it for anyone who would look.  We learned the sad fact that Wrigley has an “L” flag they fly after a loss.  It was a sad day in Wrigleyville.

The rest of our evening were more stories about Tony and other happier Cubs memories. Andy displayed his WTF flag and became a popular model as numerous people asked to take his picture. We went to some of his favorite bars where he managed to have conversations with more than one stranger in each place. This was the most uncomfortable part of the trip for me. More uncomfortable than the bike ride. Andy thrives on attention, and I prefer invisibility. He is the life of the party, while I am the ninja who hides in the shadows and occasionally throws in a devastating one liner. Loud bars are not my ideal environment.

However, we kept changing locations and not staying long because even Andy had trouble finding his niche because so many of the Cubs fans had just gone home to cry in their beers.

Finally, we hit upon a spot where we both could shine. Old Crow Smokehouse is a large place and we ordered appetizers. Andy struck up a conversation via his flag with a couple sitting next to us. We were all about the same age and they quickly learned that Andy can be full of crap. He likes to make up tall tales to see how far he can go before they wise up. That then made me their de facto BS meter. If they were not sure whether to believe him, they would look to me for confirmation. Andy told them Tony’s story and after that, we all sat together and had a great conversation. Johanna and Chris are engaged and living in Phoenix. Andy even got what sounds like a sincere invitation to a Spring Training Game. We were kicked out around 9 or 10 for last call because the Sunday hours were based on how many were in the bar and the four of us were about it.

We did one last round of Wrigleyville to hit the memories we missed durning one of the small rainfalls. This time we made it to Murphy’s Bleachers which was one of the places that was around before the business boom after the World Series win.

Five minutes in, we walked by an almost fight. This was decidedly not my scene.  We finally headed back to the Wheelhouse. I was surprised how much of Wrigleyville had rolled up the sidewalks and it was only 10:30, but that’s OK. It had been a packed day full of every emotion.

It had been a full day…and of course I had to take the top bunk. Why end the nostalgia tour now?

Monday will not be getting its own post. We asked the concierge if there was anything open for breakfast. He directed us to a place a half mile away.

We had a quiet walk… to a closed restaurant. We settled on bagels then headed back to the hotel, then Indiana and the real world.

Now go tell someone you love them.

44_for_tony_wood I have been to three MLB games in my life. Two were White Sox vs. Yankees when I was a kid and what I remember is taking home a kitten we found at a rest stop.

[bloodinyourcoffeestream]

one month of practice teaching

ＴＲＡＮＳＣＲＩＰＴ

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS WTF I HAVE SO MANY STORIES TO TELL YOU CAN I JUST CALL????????? I'M CRYING EVERY WEEK IS HELL WEEK WHEN YOU'RE A STUDENT-TEACHER

actually i would most likely just break down ya kno if my hair isn't this short i'd consider getting a haircut again, why do my kids have to be so rowdy what the actual fuck???????????????/ i've walked out on two of my classes already which is super Not a good notch on my performance but jesus fuckin christ no one ever said it would be this hard (maybe except that one senior who advised me to shift courses when i was a sophomore)

i'm saying this so often these days but i've never been this Tired in my entire goodamn life!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ya know how yoi outgays itself in every episode?? it's like that for me except each day outstresses the previous one time to die

ya i'm sorry it's just ughughhuhuhuhguhughughuhuhuhguhughuhuhuhughu teaching is fun and all but? i thought i'd stop getting stressed once i get adjusted to the environment but holy fuck it seems everyday that passes reduces my tolerance for my kids' antics

i'm a pretty chill teacher in general i let them have free reign in my time as long as they submit their outputs on time. we start the class late up to 20mins to wait for the latecomers!!!!!!!!!!! they can like eat and play music and even walk around or do stuff for other subjects and even fucking sleep!!!! (they even played 'stupid love' and 'kalimutan mo na yan' and 'titibo-tibo' in my class and i never judged them for it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) they can easily gain my permission when they want to excuse their whole class to practice for their mapeh cheerdance!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i joke around with them!!!! i treat them all like i personally ejected them outta my damn womb & raised them for 16 or so years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm a pretty chill teacher in lectures too i try to be as jolly as possible!!!!!!!! i try to make discussions interactive!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm generous with recitation chips!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (u can get chips just by sweeping the floor and erasing the board!!!!!!!!!!!!) i spend all night designing lesson-related games so that my kids wouldn't get bored!!!!!!! i give them plenty of time before the deadline!!!!!!!!!!!!! (like we spend a whole week for each output!!!) i go around the room during hands-on activities to make sure they're all doing their work properly!!!!!!!!! i even lent them my drafting stuff & provided them with bond paper bc i know how broke they are!!!!!!!!! you should come & sit in one of my classes they'll be the best thing you'll ever witness. i swear. i'm the best B-)

so holy mother of fuck why can't they give me the 1 ounce of respect i deserve? i'm so kind to them is it so hard to be kind back???? why are they all after my blood??????//

being strict's not my thing because strict teachers get less respect and u know it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sinasaway ko sila + nagtataray ako minsan pero sandaling-sandali lang then back to bibo hotdog na aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i'm so sorry for this rant i know i'm not supposed to be complaining to you i just. can't bring myself to tell my co-teachers bc they just tell me to be strict. and i can't for the life of me be strict. i literally forget which kids were noisy and rowdy after a maximum of 10 seconds!!!!!!!!!!! i easily forget which classes i'm supposed to be angry with and treat them well again the next day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! uhuhhuhuhuhuhuhuuuhhuhughughghuhuhuhuhuhhghugh kahihiyan ako

which is why i walked out of two of my classes; i feel like i've done everything to deserve their respect and it turns out i still don't. and idk what to do with them anymore honestly

i'm so stressed na bimb. minura ko na yung lower sections na hawak ko legit if my advisor/cooperating teacher(CT) finds out i'll get a bad rating for sure (and if i get a bad rating, laude is cancelledt) (super bigat na batas sa high school teachers na bawal magmura). i told them verbatim; guys kayo di ko kayo ginagago kaya pwede ba ako huwag niyo ring gaguhin? (which sounds light but not when coming from a hs teacher ok? some of them audibly gasped wow high schoolers are so soft) but even that didn't seem to have an effect on my raucous kids hanunah

anyway i just feel so weak now?? i forgive too easily specially especially after they've apologized or stopped being dicks + they make me smile so easily bc they're mostly so sweet & funny??????? why don’t i have the ability to stay mad & hold grudges & be strict hahahahhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuetangina

some 'anonymous feedback' i got was that, para raw akong baliw, one minute galit then the other bati-bati na ulit, tas parang be-babyhin ko pa yung mga sinita ko. inexplain ko nalang na di ko kayang magalit then my CT said kailangan kong maging consistent - kung galit, galit talaga, or else magmumukha talaga akong baliw. or di na ako susundin kasi parang joke lang ako magalit

b i h

iyak na c acoe

i'm sorry this is so long i feel like we haven't talked in years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm writing this in the faculty room actually haha i feel like i'd stop functioning if i don't type these out, my head is such a wreck rn bc i keep getting bad feedback about my teaching strategy, sorry for all the exclamation points :(((((((

yung CT ko pa, he's always insisting that my lower-sectioners are just a bunch of assholes, KSPs, and lazy fucks, but they're not!!!!!!!! they're actually really sweet, they can be competitive when motivated properly, and they have so much potential???? their grades might be mostly seven-liners – (yung isa kong anak aNG SAYA-SAYA NIYA NUNG BINIGYAN KO SIYA NG 79 LIKE ?????) (pinaulit ko yung gawa niya btw tinuro ko ulit sa kanya kung alin yung mga mali niya hahahahaha then naging 103/100 pa yun) (may +5 kasi pag nagpasa before the deadline so ayun) – but they're the ones who are maparaan/madiskarte; i know they're the ones who's most likely to succeed in real life. they're also the ones who greet me on the corridors & off-campus with those cheerful "hi ma'am"s!!! ma'am buhatin ko na gamit mo!! ma'am ako na magwawalis!! idk if i’m a fool but i only see kindness & initiative in their actions?? these pabibos are gonna go far, i believe in them so much, i really go

the top-sectioners my CT puts on such a high pedestal are mostly GCs and self-entitled, always have their noses in the air & think they're better than everyone including me. always competing with their "Friends", crab mentality, always memorizing my material even if i always tell them to Understand instead of memorize bc they'll never learn shit that way????

i'm so dismayed bc there's a very specific mould that determines whether you're a 'good teacher' or not. and that mould is so, so different from what my shape is. that mould goes against my beliefs and principles; that mould is nearly everything i've been wanting to fight against when i decided to be a teacher and holy shit it looks like i have to fit in that stupid, ugly mould if i want to graduate. nevermind cum laude; i'd never graduate unless i fit in that bullshit mould

shet bes magpapakain ako sa sistema makakuha lang ng diploma

ily so much baks thanks for listening to my stupid rants. i don't know who to turn to, everyone else is like 'ganun talaga' or some other bs i wanna jump off a cliff, pls i'd rather disappear than magpalamon sa sistema. tangina ng sistema

why do i have to be so stubborn why am i like this?????

bes

ang sama pala maging weird

tanggap ko na nga sarili ko eh minamahal ko na nga yung pagiging weird ko pero hindi pala pwede; not in this profession; shet bes i need to become normal 2 survive. no fun allowed

now i just want to go home & send u thing whole novel can u believe i've been here since 5:30am!!!!!!! every!!! single!!!! weekday!!!!!! it's 5pm now but i can't go home yet bc i have to check tons of student outputs and write 5 semi-detailed lesson plans so that i can actually rest at home. someone take me out, the footbridge in sandigan is really tempting sometimes you know? the one that crosses over the underpass and u can see all the trucks passing underneath the bridge, plus theres a bunch of electric cables too. and when you're standing on that spot on the footbridge, the view of the sky is super pretty too. (you know what, maybe i'll take a photo when i pass by later. if it's there's still daylight out, that is.) it's so tempting sometimes,, sadly i'll never hear jung hoseok's contagious laughter if i pull any shit

do u think i should drop out now and just. i dunno work as a farmer in pangasinan or somewhere farther, like in visayas or maybe even cambodia where so much myths and folklore thrive, at least that sounds a lot less mentally taxing. i have backpain now anyway; i won't have to complain about that when i'm actually farming

i can't even listen to all the older songs i like bc they make me nostalgic about the past sjhkjhkjdhfkshdk i've told you how much i hate this nostalgia already, it hasn't stopped yet, gods help me!! i keep saying, "sana thesis na lang, thesis na lang ulit" and it's not even funny anymore

i'm so sorry for telling you all this :((( i'm sure you're stressed with school too, i hope i'm not adding to that. don't worry about me, okay? i'm probably not as stressed as i seem anyway, i tend to overact a lot then be perfectly fine after drying my tear ducts and then an 8-hour sleep and like a hot meal that isn't just reheated for the 5th time. i'm so sorry for making you read all this, this is like 5 whole pages i'm sorry :'((((

there's another lower-sectioner i wanna tell you about but this is getting ridiculously long, ask me about patricia sometime ok? it's kind of long-ish hahahaha

but u know what the worst thing is??? I BOUGHT TWO PUDDINGS FROM THE BAKERY YESTERDAY & ONE OF THEM FELL ON THE PAVEMENT JUST LIKE THAT. IF THE GOD'S AREN'T BULLYING ME IDK WHAT THIS IS

[fajrihanny]

Backstreet Boys 2017 : Larger Than Life

Oh my God, we’re back again~

So a few months back, there was that little news on my Facebook that Backstreet Boys were coming back to Singapore for one night only - and it’s their only stop in Asia in 2017! 

Did I rush to get the tickets? You bet I did. 

But this is to note that Singapore Sports Hub ticket system sucks - that virtual waiting room just got me so nervous. I needed to open few different browsers so I got more chances in the ticket!

Anyway, I got the ticket and I upgraded myself (and Husband, of course) to the ...2nd cheapest class available. Haha. 

Oh well, at least this is not our first time. I mean, we saw them back in 2015 (has it been 2 years?!) and we pretty much knew what we were expecting.

The concert was held in NATIONAL STADIUM. OK, they only opened half of the stadium for the concert but man, I was really surprised when I saw the venue! I imagined it’s going to be big and full of a blast! 

But was it?

The concert was supposed to start at 8.30 pm so we did Maghrib first at home. When we reached the venue, it was close to 8 pm. We thought we still had time for some snacks cause we were both quite hungry. Alas, we didn’t.

My friend who was already inside the stadium since 7 (!!) texted me and said that the security check took a while so I better queued early. Meh.

So we ditched our original plan and went to queue early. Poor Husband who was so hungry :(. When we reached the first security check... oh man, I started to appreciate how swift security check at Star Vista. They were fast, efficient, and most importantly, everything was done in an airconditioned room!

I digress - but the weather was really killing us outside even at night.

When we finally passed the last check, it was like 8.20 pm so we rushed to our section which was.... so far at the back LOL. Even my seats back in 2015 were SO MUCH BETTER and I paid less!

Anyway, enough of my rants. Let’s get on with the concert review.

***

At 8.30 pm, the big screen played a medley/remix of Backstreet Boys’ songs. That’s new (for me). The screen also flashed lots of clips from their music video - kinda like a mash-up.

That’s how far our seats were from the stage

The medley went on for about 10 minutes before finally, the concert started with “Larger Than Life”. So apt.

The crowd went wild but I stayed calm in my seat. LOL. Age is really catching up with me now. The boys (well - men) looked all smiley and did their best to open the concert with a bang, but I noticed that everyone’s voice was too tired. 

Next on the list was “The One”. Brian’s voice was a bit off and he couldn’t hit some of his notes in this song. And, as usual, the crowd cheered the loudest for Nick. Ah well, the teen heartthrob still has it.  They continued with “Get Down”. Not my favorite so I tended to skip. Kevin had a long hair and meh. Seemed like they toned down some parts of the choreography - maybe to cater to their age. After all, they are all backstreet dads now. Heh.  When the song was done, they started the first chat session. AJ has always been the heart of the party and this time it was no different. Nick followed afterwards and man the cheers could make my ears go deaf! He complained of how humid Singapore was that night and .... *drumroll* he also announced NEW ALBUM. 

PLEASE OH PLEASE MAKE IT BLACK AND BLUE VER 2.0!

Next was Kevin and I just wanted to chop that long hair of his.  After that short break, “Drowning” was played. Everyone looked so mellow. And at this point of the concert, I was starting to get annoyed at how bad the sound system was and how Brian still couldn’t hit some of his high notes right. What’s up with these?

The mellow mood continued with “Incomplete”. Meh. I am usually OK with Backstreet Boys’ slower songs but they didn’t sound... suitable for this open-air concert.

Luckily the next song was more upbeat. Now, this is weird but why was everyone so excited about “Quit Playing Games”? I mean, it’s a song about a man who got cheated on by his girlfriend! We were served with another intermission. Now it’s few slides which showed each member’s now and then. Wanna guess who got - like 50% more cheers than the others?

(Hint: it was not AJ nor Brian nor Kevin nor Howie) I was expecting more songs after those slides were over, but apparently... there was a bit of dance break. Yeah, forgot to mention that they brought a HELL lot of back dancers for this concert.  Not really interested in the dancers so I took that chance to rest my voice. I haven’t stopped singing while I was having a pretty bad cold and my throat was killing me. 

The dance show was finally over and... “Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely” was on. Oh crap. 

I am always weak for this song ;_; At some point of this song, I think I got some tears in my eyes. And finally, Brian hit his high notes perfectly!

They took a lighter mood with “I’ll Never Break Your Heart”. The crowd was swaying their heads to the left and right. Awww~ I have to say though that AJ’s adlib was awesome. How come his voice was that stable - this is no joke man! Next on the setlist was “Anywhere For You” and sorry, I was just not feeling it. My least favorite song of the night. 

... Or so I thought. Until next song was up and I didn’t even recognize the song?! I took my phone out and Soundhound-ed it and found out that it’s called “Darlin’”

Apparently, the stadium thought the same as me cause I swear I didn’t hear any choir from the crowd when this song was sung. Why was this song even on the list?

There was another dance show after that and I groaned - again?? Next song was “Undone” and the audience died down LOL. Maybe because this song was not nostalgic enough. But again, AJ’s voice~ <3 

The men (HAH!) had another break and Brian took the crowd. “We are only halfway done!” Seriously? The concert was already on for almost an hour and according to my ticket, it’s supposed to be only for 90 minutes. No way we were getting 2 hours concert right?

Brian said that their next song was his favorite and it was...

“As Long As You Love Me”

OK WHERE WAS MY MICROPHONE.

And the best part was, THEY DID FREAKING CHAIR DANCE GUYS. Granted, it was only for mere 30 seconds but COME ON IT’S THE LEGENDARY CHAIR DANCE. PS. Anyone can guess why is it that this song is Brian’s favorite?  (Hint: His wife. You are welcome)

Well, there was another intermission after the song ended. Now it’s another medley of their songs - one of those is “Everyone”- a less popular song from their ‘Black and Blue’ album. I couldn’t help but wonder why were there so many intermissions in this concert? And almost all of them were so abrupt and so disorganized. Honestly, I was a bit annoyed and feeling like this concert was really lacking in preparation. 

We were left for about 20 minutes. After the intermission was done, suddenly there was a phone ringing somewhere and I knew exactly what was the next song....

“The Call”

I sang my voice out lol. I knew I was getting myself a lot of trouble but come on, it’s THE CALL. They had a lot of back dancers for this song by the way. Concert moved on with “Get It Down” and “Get Another Boyfriend”. Followed by the last intermission from Howie. 

I could feel that the concert was reaching the last spurt. And I was expecting “I Want It That Way” any moment LOL. But no. It was “More Than That” which was a welcoming breather after so many dance numbers. 

Next came up “Shape Of My Heart”. I pretty much lost my voice at this stage. Playback was too strong and the inconsistencies in the sound system became more and more apparent.  Another dance show was up and for once - this was a number that I can appreciate. The dancers danced to “Straight Through My Heart” and “It’s Gotta Be You”. Man, their energy didn’t seem to slow down.

And finally, the intro to “I Want It That Way” was played. I ROSE FROM MY CHAIR OK. This is the legendary song from the epic 1999 - the only song from Backstreet Boys that I am willing to dance to. And I think the whole stadium agreed with me that night cause the choir was SO LOUD I didn’t think the group needs to sing at all lol.

When the song finally finished, everyone seemed to notice that the concert was going to end soon. Oh well. Everything good will end eventually. But of course.. there’s still an encore... “Backstreet’s Back”.

Unfortunately, I was already too tired to even sing along lol. 

Once the encore was done, the group waved goodbye and went to the backstage. The crowd moved fast to the exit - age is really catching up with us. Enough of nostalgia. Time to go back home and to reality.

***

Honestly, if you asked me, I don’t really like this concert. It felt too commercialized. It’s weirdly tied to WTA finals. if you buy a package of WTA finals ticket and Backstreet Boys concert, there will be freebies or upgrade if I remember correctly. Talk about profits. 

With 20,000 people buying the tickets, you would expect that they would have extra screens in the Stadium - but no, there was only ONE giant screen in the middle of the stadium. And guess who couldn’t even get a look at the group? People who sat on the side - like us. I know - beggars can’t choose, but come on, we paid for our tickets. 

The sound system was blah. Often times the playback was even stronger than the boys’ singing and it was so off-putting. The back dancers were such eyesores at some points of the concert - not their fault but they made the concert felt like just another Vegas show instead of a concert for Singapore fans.

The humid weather didn’t really help either. But again, this could be solved by ... I don’t know - extra fans? The organizer should have more experiences how to troubleshoot this right?

And lastly, again perhaps it’s the age, but Backstreet Boys looked so tired. They jetted to Singapore for 30 hours straight from the other side of the globe. From what I saw in their social media, they were still in the US two days before the concert! So if that’s true, they had no rest before they appeared in Singapore.

I sounded like an angry fan - but if you compare this concert with their 2015 concert, it’s like heaven vs earth. Maybe because they were a bit younger back then? Or maybe because the 2015 one was indoor and it was more intimate with only 5,000 attendees? I don’t know.

I think, twice is enough. It has been fun to sing along with the other fans but now, let me just rewatch their old videos and soak into nostalgia at the comfort of my bed. 

[geek-gem]

A little talk about Michael Bay

I'm gonna say if I sound stupid forgive me and shit. Including correct me please. Also I might get off topic. Yet it's mainly well about the Michael Bay thing on the Dora The Explorer movie.

Including I found the notes funny mainly in the 2nd thing I reblogged that relates to this which was the last thing before my latest reblog. Seeing funny notes and ones I agree with. Basically the kind of jokes I forgot to hope for people would make when Michael Bay gets involved with a franchise. Including a cartoon.

I'm gonna say Thank you @angel-baez hope your not bothered by me mentioning you. But thanks for sharing that news.

But okay back on topic Michael Bay. I don't like him as a director. While honestly some of his films seem okay haven't seen them all. I'm mainly talking about the bigger ones where he's involved with a franchise. Such as Transformers and TMNT. Now Dora too and I remember okay these are cartoons in a way. While others were film franchise's.

Including I was inspired seeing a latest post about Steven Universe a reblog by Angel himself love that name lol chill out normal to smile just did. But about view points or yeah it's that post I mainly think about. But also the other Dora related posts.

Basically I wanted to say this and I did think a bit and waited till these women left Pizza Hut where I feel better to type this.

In fact this is where I get off topic.

Despite all the critical shit Steven Universe gets.

In a way or no yes.

Be grateful Steven Universe doesn't have Michael Bay putting his hands on it.

Including being pissed off at times at certain times people hating on the Crewniverse however it goes yeah that's how it's spelt remember.

But remembering seeing someone call Rebecca Sugar a racist which made me go what the fuck and other things. Including at times me being angry that I would like the show to be taken away from people yet that is not reasonable.

The concept and idea of Micheal Bay working on an adaption of Steven Universe or on the show itself. You would be begging for the original crew to still be working on it and praise the original show as a masterpiece.

Including Micheal Bay his films mainly the big ones or just.... here's some stuff. The explosions lots of people know that it's like a meme of him. Including sexualizing women at times. But at the same time I'm trying to not sound stupid. Yet women in his films just...Jesus. Also racism and I suppose if I remember right stereotypes. Along with thin plotlines honestly not everything has to be big but when it's the same shit mainly discussing the Transformers films. Basically Michael Bay does a lot of shit.

It's fucking amazing the 5th Transformers film was shit and it had new writers but it proved something if Michael Bay is still on. We are never going to get a film as okay or as good as the first film or even better. Including the aftermath of that 5th film sweet Jesus I'm glad I didn't see it. Yet it feels so weird I didn't seeing the film on sale on the PlayStation Store on my PS4 and just that 4th film changed me. Or basically I don't really like the Nostalgia Critic yet his video about that 4th film changed me. Where Doug plays the character.

Even though I changed over time about my opinions and shit. Yet I'm mainly upset and see the Transformers live action films as some of the worst ways to adapt a franchise got a text message from a aid from school told her some what an hour ago I left.

Seriously it makes me sad. Including I wanna mention seriously you would praise a Zack Snyder adaptation or just version of Steven Universe and I have thought of this. I don't hate Zack Snyder I like his work. But also people's reactions to him are crazy. Including I some times make jokes about Steven dies and he comes back Jesus style.

Including during the first Steven Bomb of 2016 after that bomb actually. Made some weird thing this thought Rose is God, Yellow Diamond is the devil, and Steven is Jesus yet that's bullshit some weird religious meaning shit but when I found out about well actually more in depth of what the show was doing. That no one was a villain in the show and we look into why they do the things they do. It changed me thinking that some post I liked when I was still new here on Tumblr. Basically talking about or mentioning yeah Steven Universe isn't a black and white tv show.

But sorry to get off topic. Were on the case of Michael Bay but just saying you'll like a Zack Snyder version of Steven Universe maybe he'll shove a lot of story lines in the face and change some stuff. Yet respect them at the same time. Also just really I'm thinking just... seriously some criticals have pissed me off that I think of how the show should be.

Yet Michael Bay back to him. His work on stuff like Transformers and TMNT, will say the first film is the reason I became a fan yet just...it's another story. I don't mind the third yet seriously just everything.

I was okay with the first TMNT but thought the 2nd was better. Yet their not the best it depends on your own opinion.

Seriously no one attacks Michael Bay or says let's boy cott his stuff yet people assume Rebecca Sugar is a racist when clearly their intention was not that. Along with even if it's a show. Movies and TV shows are different but seriously you complain of how some characters are portrayed and consider some stereotypes. I could try to understand in a way. But compare that to the shit Michael Day has done. Including other films like Pain And Gain a film that was really surprised and shocked me. In a way one of his better films. But my judgement is a weird considered he based that upon a real life crime and other shit.

Also the famous Nostalgia Critic review of Pearl Harbor while I never seen the film. Just well I have seen bits of it at Hawaii last year yeah interesting right at Hawaii just....I don't care for Nostalgia Critic much these days despite some funny moments. The film doesn't seem to be the best.

I'm sounding stupid basically just what he touches I just don't like his work. Seriously it's a miracle he doesn't have his hands on the Sonic The Hedgehog franchise on that upcoming film by Paramount not Sony. While I rather have Warner Bros to have the rights for personal reasons. Yet keep Bay away from that shit typos for shit and others.

I remember that Sonic Legends fake movie thing I talked about and it was fake yet I believed it, but it was on Deviantart this awesome poster and information. It saying Michael Bay directing and I think Steven Spielberg executive producing like with the Transformers films. Also DreamWorks and Paramount a CGI PG-13 movie. Amazing years later Paramount actually gets the rights.

But the thought of that and Michael Bay fucking up storylines while not the best some were deep. Such as Shadow's story from Sonic Adventure 2 and Sonic Unleashed a game I love and reblogged a shit ton. Including even keep him away from Sonic Forces and Sonic Mania despite I dislike the custom character. I'm being weird wanna mention 06 but no yet just tv is on in here and some guy in here.

Seriously I thought this imagine The Loud House him working on that and considering the shit that went down, or Wander Over Yonder, or OK KO shows I love and others too.

I got off topic yet this could relate to Dora The Explorer which was a cartoon first. Just.....I'm getting worked up. But I wanted to talk about that Steven Universe part and Sonic. Yet I thought of other things like other cartoons.

Oh yeah imaging Michael Bay's Gravity Falls I don't like that show anymore but God damn the idea lol normal to smile.....

I don't think I'll tag this just....I'm typing this in a Pizza Hut lol just I feel that says something. But lol almost left I but just almost left o.....smiled right now.....

I'm getting distracted but I seriously wanted to talk about this. Sorry ticks started to get ahold of me my Autism. I was basically trying to be deep lol just....smiling a bit because it's funny in a way but sad.

Yet I could be getting worked up. But I think someone should say sometime I seriously thought that was fake yet that college humor thing did it say it parodied Michael Bay just asking. I need to finish my pizza and sorry to bother

Edit wow my smile wasn't really a little talk and even thought first I just wrote This

[rodrigohyde]

Interview: Scott Eastwood takes the wheel as a badass car thief in ‘Overdrive’

Hollywood badass Scott Eastwood is ready to take center stage.

After appearing in action films like The Fate of the Furious, Suicide Squad, and the upcoming Pacific Rim: Uprising, the 31-year-old is getting behind the wheel of his own (potential) franchise in Overdrive. It's a welcome opportunity for the burgeoning star, especially because the new action-thriller gave Eastwood a chance to combine two of his biggest passions: acting and classic cars.

[RELATED1]

“I think I may have said yes to the role right when they pitched me,” Eastwood told Men’s Fitness. “They said, ‘Classic car thief in the South of France,’ and honestly, before I even read the script, I said, ‘Yeah, I'm in.’ It was almost a selfish thing, because I love classic cars. Classics are like my wet dream.”

In the film, Eastwood plays Andrew Foster, a thief who travels around the world with his half-brother Garrett (Freddie Thorp), looking for the most expensive classic cars they can find—and then steal. But after crossing notorious crime boss Jacomo Morier (Simon Abkarian) by stealing his prized 1937 Bugatti, the duo must put together a team (played by Ana de Armas and Gaia Weiss) to steal a rare Ferrari from Morier’s rival, or suffer the consequence. Which is death.

The “let’s get a team together” vibe and the car-centric story may open Overdrive up to comparisons to the Fast & Furious franchise, but Eastwood sees it as its own thing.

“Fast and the Furious is such a big animal,” Eastwood said. “This one was a much smaller movie, so it's a little different. Everyone sort of knows their role and place in Fast and the Furious. On this one, we were just trying to go, ‘OK, what are we going to do? Does this move make sense? The cars are beautiful. Let's just go.’ It was cool and a really fun experience.”

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Eastwood is a self-professed “car nerd,” so he didn’t need too much preparation when it came to getting behind the wheel for stunts, many of which he did on his own.

“I felt like I knew everything about these classic cars,” Eastwood said. “What's interesting is a lot of these classic cars that are worth so much money now, they're pretty much works of art. Along with that comes stories, like why certain cars are worth so much, because this car won at Le Mans in '62 against Ford or this famous racer died in this car in this race. There's certain nostalgia that comes along with it, and I was sort of already in touch with that world. So there's not a lot I had to train for car-wise.”

With Overdrive now under his belt, would Eastwood ever follow the footsteps of his legendary father, Clint, and get behind the camera to direct? It’s a major possibility.

“Yeah definitely, just for a little bit more down the road,” Eastwood said. “I'm only 31, so I'm still young in this game. But I want to do it down the road. I've got to find the right material first.”

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Eastwood spoke with Men’s Fitness about his favorite classic cars, doing his own stunts, and why Overdrive is the perfect “straight-up popcorn” movie.

MEN’S FITNESS: What drew you to the role in Overdrive and what made you excited about being a part of this movie?

Scott Eastwood: It was a car thing. I have to be really honest: It was the car thing. I love classic cars, and we shot in some of the most beautiful locations. I really loved Antibes in the South of France. It's very close to Cannes and it's gorgeous—definitely one of my favorite places. It was almost like fairytale. It was an amazing experience.

What are some of your favorite classic cars? What were the cars you enjoyed working with the most on the film?

I would have to lean toward the Ferrari and probably the 250 GTO, just because I guess I'm a little bit in love with that time era, with the Le Mans and the Ferrari and the Ford rivalry. I think that's just such a cool, innovative era, through the '60s. You have the birth of the Cobra because of that. You have so many innovative things that happened for race cars in the '60s. They sort of transcend that decade. So I'd probably lean toward that. Second place would probably be the Bugatti, the '39 Bugatti Alicante.

What was your workout routine like as you trained for the movie?

I'd wake up and get some yoga in, maybe a sauna, at like 5:00 in the morning. Then go get ready for work. Instead of having lunch sometimes and just getting lethargic, I would hit a secondary gym. I'd hit a first gym session maybe in the morning, knock some stuff out, but then I'd hit a gym session at lunch or I would use some free weights we had around. We'd do everything from squats, to pushups, to lunges with free weights. You just can knock out the odds and ends during lunch for even 30 minutes. Then you get that endorphin kick, and so you're not lethargic after lunch, but you don't sit and just kind of veg out. You actually are burning the calories, and then you can just pack some good protein and veggies right afterwards.

You did a lot of your own stunts for the film. What was it like preparing for those, and why do you enjoy getting behind the wheel and doing most of the stunts yourself?

I really enjoyed the stunt work a lot. That's the stuff that keeps me going in this business for sure. It’s great when you get to raise the adrenaline a little bit, because if not, I get kind of bored sometimes. Once in a while I need to say, ‘Let's fucking crank this bitch up.’ But I think that that was probably the most fun, and I really enjoyed just being in the cars.

Did you deal with any injuries while making the film and doing those stunts?

I think as an athlete or actor, you're always playing hurt. You've always got something. You're always dealing with this, that, and the other. But you know, just gonna deal with it, grind through and keep on hammering.

What are you hoping people enjoy about the movie and get out of the experience?

I hope they just go to have fun. No expectations. Go eat some popcorn, watch some fast cars, and just have a big smile on your face and have fun. Not everything's got to be super-serious. I want to do some more dramatic movies in the future, too. I love serious movies. But yeah, this is just a straight-up popcorn flick and it’s fun.

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What was your nutrition plan while training for the film? What are some of your favorite healthy foods to help you stay in shape?

My favorite meal, it's pretty standard. I try and have every meal as clean and pure as I can. I’d go with wild-caught salmon, with either brown rice or sweet potato, and broccoli. But I'd switch broccoli for kale sometimes. I'd substitute, shake it up a little bit. But that is pretty much my epic meal. That and maybe some artichoke on the side because I love artichokes. That is pretty much what my dad [legendary director Clint Eastwood] eats every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. So you're getting those omega fatty oils, you're getting incredibly great lean protein. You're getting a good natural carb, and you're getting what I call your colon scrub with all your broccoli and your veggies to move everything through.

What was it like working with the producers behind action films like Taken, Wanted, 3:10 to Yuma, and 2 Fast 2 Furious? What was it like to be part of that group now?

It was really cool. You have guys like producer Pierre Morel, who directed Taken. You've got this young guy, director Antonio Negret, who has done a couple Latin films, so he brought some interesting flavor to it. It’s like a classic action movie, but with cars. So that was my expectation, and it was great.

While you can’t get into spoiler territory too much, what was it like working on Pacific Rim: Uprising?

I'm super-excited about that one. Me and John Boyega teaming up—I really liked the dynamic he and I had together. In the film we have some issues we have to resolve, and I think it's cool the way it goes down. Not to give anything away, but there's some cool new shit. It’s going to be really awesome.

Overdrive is now in theaters and available on Digital HD. The DVD and Blu-ray release will be available on November 7.

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from Men's Fitness http://www.mensfitness.com/life/entertainment/interview-scott-eastwood-takes-wheel-badass-car-thief-overdrive

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8/26/17, 4:31pm - Some Kinda Closure

gonna actually try to write this time.

So I had no patients for tuesday, but my boss let me work during the day to cover the hours. What that meant is that I worked 18 hours straight on a day where I told my buddy Jwilli that he could stay at my place and that I’d want to take him out for karaoke. Couldn’t manage to take a nap and proceeded to have the longest fucking day of my life. Bustered out in bracket and got bummed out, went to hang out with Angie and convinced her to come out to karaoke with us. Smoked on the back patio of the bar with these randos (I fucking love greensboro sometimes), told a bunch of stupid jokes and bounced to this bar closer to my house with Josh, the queen I met last time. Turns out him and angie already knew each other. So I’m meeting a bunch of his friends (couldn’t possibly tell you any of their names now), get in this big hissyfit argument with this girl friend of his who said she was pansexual, and when I described myself as biflexible she said that it was disgusting and that I just wanted to get laid when I was drunk. All I could say was pretty much, yeah, i mean who doesn’t want to get laid when they’re drunk. Plus I don’t wanna tease gays by saying I’m really bi that’s not fair lol. She tried to convince me that since I felt some attraction to men sometimes that you might as well call it bi and I was like “well that’s silly that’s like everyone should just be pansexual then.” Idk the conversation didn’t end up with us fighting so that’s good. Luckily drunk me has that trollish charm that people can just slide anger off of lmfao. After we popped by Josh’s a sec we were gonna go to another party but Jack and Angie were tired, so I took them home and had some great drunk sex. That was the last I’d see of Angie. After this trip she ended up breaking things off a few days ago.

But things with her were a little wonky, yknow? Like she wasn’t too confident in her appearance and was always confused that I’d flirt and say things like “i’m not someone to lust after.” I guess she was kinda right, I wasn’t overly excited about her appearance as much as her personality, but it’s a shame. I had encouraged her to pick up this second job that was more like what she wanted to do with her life, she got it no problem, but got doubly busy so I’m assuming she just became too adulty and didn’t really have time for me. Or whatever it doesn’t really matter, it’s nice having someone break things off and not feel bad about it.

Between her telling me I’m sexy as fuck and all these gay guys hitting on me all the time I’m pretty confident in how I look again lol. Not overly confident, I still wanna cut all this silly gold hair off now and maybe tone up a bit but not enough that I actually care to do anything about it lmaooo.

/

So anyway, that weekend was the annual delta sig reunion. Really happy that my boss switched my shifts so that I could go. It was probably the best thing that could’ve happened to me. Getting to bro out with everyone and share music with Nic and talk about Kailey stuff with Tato and Dakota and drunkenly bro with everyone up on the rooftop was amazing. We got fucking plastered playing drinking games, it was incredible. Got some great pics, but ofc I don’t share my pics with anybody lol.

The catch with the alumni weekend though was that Kailey was coming to spend the day with Jacober on day 2. So at first I was the tiniest bit salty. She shows up at the pool party and acts like I don’t exist at first, of course. And she looks as incredible as ever. So I pour myself into drinking, play the pokemon drinking board game with everyone, catch up with everyone. Hung out in the sauna cooking myself and drinking it was excellent lmao. We ended up talking a bit and I found out she’s got a great new job lined up making twice as much money as me right out of college and is doing well, so that’s good.

The best way to describe our relationship now is that we’re strangers who happen to know each other very well. I like that description a lot.

There was this great moment where I’m like drunkenly sulking by the poolside and this fat chick that one of the younger brothers had brought walks up to me. She says “did you mean to dye your hair that color?” I say “yeah, I wanted it like yellowish gold.” and she just says “well it’d look better if you’d dye it lighter.” and I just say “well you’d look better if you lost some fucking weight.” bahahahaha. She got that it was just a rib and playfully kicked at me, but I was at That level of not giving a fuck from the whole ordeal. Took a great group pic and I laid around sunning in my supreme hat and Griff told me that “I looked like a rapper.” I think that means he thinks i’m cool, i took it as high praise lmao.

 So we leave the lake house and I’m heading home with tato and dakota, Conner asks “where are jacober and kailey?” and I like mutter “well I don’t give a shit.” and he laughed and just says “hah I caught that.” So Dakota and Tato are like trying to get my feelings out of me because all I’ve said about anything is that and when tato had asked if I was gonna be ok with kailey being there I loudly and overexcitedly (intentionally in order to express my sarcasm) Oh yeah it’s fucking great.  It’s hard to describe. I’m like feeling great and having a good time with everyone, but fading in and out of this state of like salty disdain with everything. And tato can clearly pick up on this, so he’s trying to cheer me up by talking to the uber driver.

The uber driver tells us about how he’s ubering to make some extra money to take care of his kids since a divorce, but that now he’s in this wonderful relationship with this girl that he loves. So tato’s like “see? Things get better.” So he starts asking about more details and like this guy’s story is nutty. His first wife leaves him, he starts dating this girl from high school who has a few daughters and after like a year of dating and living together one day she up and leaves and takes all of his shit and maxxes out a bunch of credit cards in his name. And even though they weren’t married the court rules in her favor that he has to pay for all of it. So that’s why he’s really ubering on the side. And the girl he loves works night shift and he works day shift AND they’re long distance so they don’t get to see OR talk to each other much. So i just come out of the uber shaking my head and joking like “damn, with a life like that when do you just like call it quits?” Like suicide isn’t funny i guess, but god damnnnn hahahahah. 

So the three of us bro out in the dorm rooms we’re staying at, and I open up a little bit about feeling inadequate and about that time of my life being over and whatnot. And tato was just like “yeah well she was too young for you anyway.” So I hrmphed that, but I knew what he meant, because the split really was because that time of my life was just ending. So it led to this realization that a lot of my depression and feelings for kailey were all just tied up in this post-college doldrum nostalgia. Good to finally realize that that’s normal. College is cool, adulthood sucks, it’s nothing to sit and cry about. So that was part 1 of moving on.

We proceed to get drunk and high on the rooftop again that night. I’m flirting with this girl grace, we’re all hanging out topless (girls have bras on) playing this game piccolo and drinking. Kailey and Jacober and a few people are still hanging around. Her and Jacober kiss and I call out gayyyyyyyy and she gets all defensive saying how yeah it IS gay because she’s really happy. All I could think was that I’m glad she’s happy, but you’ve missed the joke lmao. Shrugged off that response. So later people are starting to drift off, and Kailey and I finally got a few words with her one on one while we smoked a joint together, but we didn’t really say much. She told me she didn’t like my hair either but I didn’t really give a fuck. She talked about how much she hated when people got in the way of her getting high and I thought about that girl I just broke things off with and how they really did sound exactly the same.  Then have one of the best one on one talks with Jacober that I’ve ever had. We talked about our dads and life a little bit. I really fucking love that guy he’s so damn nice lmao. He goes to grab something for Kailey and like skips away and me and Kailey say at the same time “what a cuuuutey.” Then she looked at me almost frustrated like I was making fun of her until she saw that I was being genuine? Idk I was a little drunk and high who knows how reliable a narrator I really am, but this is how I remember it. 

Then I’m hanging out with gus and his friend singing out frank ocean jams, until his friend starts crying about how his friend died. I say whoooo ok i’ve gotta go and tag along with jacober and kailey as we leave the roof. Don’t really remember talking about anything of importance, just said goodbye when we got to our rooms and said to have a good night. Like I said, strangers who know each other really well. But like all of it, her just being salty and negative reminded me that I was better off. So part 2 of moving on.

In the morning Dakota Tato Jack and I went to bojangles and joked about a bunch of shit before peaceing out. Really was a fucking great weekend.