#okay i know it can't be that dangerous

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage]

my greatest achievement in DA2 is maxing out Carver's friendship

and all it took was begrudgingly kissing a little templar ass in act 1 because Carver didn't want to plan a prison break if my Hawke got his ass arrested for being stupid.

[sarah-cam]

i've seen some people bringing up the parallel of how tim told lucy that they were worth the risk to how tim broke up with her... this is a great parallel don't get me wrong and it is so painful and i feel so sad for lucy

HOWEVER i've also seen people absolutely railing on tim and calling him a coward for leaving her and saying that this is unforgivable. i get being upset with him, i'm not saying that's wrong. but i just want to offer my take:

tim is absolutely broken down. this is the lowest point he's ever reached and it's been building and building since before we even met him. everything that happened in his childhood, in the army, with isabel, the trauma we've seen from the job these last 5-6 seasons. and now this, which has brought everything he's never dealt with to the surface. he truly believes in his bones that lying to lucy was what he had to do to protect her. even when lucy (rightfully) told him to stop, he said he can't because it's who he is. it's all he has right now because if he's going to lie and break the rules and compromise him morals, he is damn sure going to do whatever it takes to protect the people he loves.

he grew up with an abusive father who made him believe that he doesn't deserve to be loved, let alone unconditionally. he had no control in his childhood so he got that control by joining the military, and when he finally had that control?? he screwed up and blames himself for getting his teammates killed. he tried to gain back that control by becoming a police officer/to but never felt like he needed to move up any higher than that and now we know why. he didn't want to be a leader again because he didn't think he deserved it. he was terrified of losing lucy with the UC work and didn't even realize it, because when she's gone, he doesn't know what's going on and can't back her up. he has no control.

and now this? he compromised everything he believes in, as he said, "to save his career" but it's not that simple. if he told the truth, that angela and lucy knew about everything and still helped him, they would still lose everything he tried to protect them from. he can't even look at himself in the mirror right now.

he's not a coward for breaking up with lucy. he's not walking away because they had a fight and he doesn't want to work through it. in fact, she validated everything he did!! she showed him that she still loves him no matter what he did, that she would've done the same thing. but to him, that's even worse because he doesn't believe he deserves unconditional love, so when lucy gives it, he thinks that he's dragging her down because how could anyone love him after this. giving their relationship a shot was worth the risk because she is worth the risk. but him? he's not worth it

it's not cowardly to take yourself out of a relationship that you're not mentally okay to be in.

[sorrelpaws]

they need to address season six episode two Rick: A Mort Well Lived otherwise i will start biting shit

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

thinking about superheroes unfortunately

[buttercup-barf]

Under the cut are mostly self-insert doodles of decreasing quality. Again, not much directly tied to Team Fortress 2. Might as well toss these out while I have no access to my puter. Much yapping under the cut and in the tags incoming.

Another self-insert, this time less of a "here's me as a tenth class" and more of a "here's my game experiences translated into the class I would take the place of". The Cleaner. Although I guess they could still be wearing either suit. It doesn't matter that much.

That one Convict's Case taunt with Backup would be extremely funny, because the man would be on the verge of a breakdown (he does not want to go to jail so bad you have no idea). The second image- I owe no explanation. You know what I am. You see the pattern with my favourites.

The duality of the man. Resting face versus "just heard you express interest in religion/Russian folklore" face. He's not that hard to make friends with, when you pull him away from all the explosions.

Some doodles of trying to figure his face out. Unfortunately, the more I stare at him, the more I worry that he looks like A Certain Guy With The Last Name "Kazarin", and the fear of never being original in my life caught up to me.

Don't look at me, don't perceive me, I refuse to explain any of my actions to you.

[sallysellsseashellssundays]

Ya'll have no idea how much brainrot I have rn...it's "the Doctor with Rose vs without Rose" dynamic that drives me insane🥺🥺🥺

[bylertruther]

the crazy thing abt will and mike is that we mostly learn will is gay because other people tell us he is, but we learn that mike is gay (despite him telling us he's not, begging us to pls see tht he's not gay) because literally everything that he does is so fucking gay. because in him trying to not be gay he is just being so unbelievably extra fucking gay without realizing. like. el is literally his red herring idc i'll say it stone me if u must but the truth must be said !!!!

[timewizard-oldman]

i just finished watching adventure time i am so not ok about fern im so not ok about everything actually

fern is literally so special to me i've cried over him like 3 times......, i feel your pain unknown individual..............

[heartshattering]

I'll wake up and this will all be a nightmare, right?

[fazcinatingblog]

She's out of control, why is she like this

And then when I explained myself, she doesn't reply so I'm thinking okay great I made a good point, she'll just back down and not argue with me, but she follows up at 6am:

[stormyoceans]

monica, do we have pepperpapang?

I MEAN. TECHNICALLY NO BUT ALSO THEY SEEMED KINDA HINTED BUT ALSO THE WRITERS TRIED TO FRIEND ZONE THEM?????? im very perplexed rn ;;;;;;;

idk if you kept up with the show, but to sum it up [SPOILERS FOR DANGEROUS ROMANCE FOR ANYONE WHO HASN'T SEEN IT] saifah (papang's character) and name (pepper's character) were high school friends who lost sight of each other after graduation. in episode 2, we learn that name has become a loan shark and he comes to collect saifah's debt for the month

after that, saifah gets a job as khang's (perth's character) grandmother's caretaker, while we don't really see name except for one time where he gives sailom (perth's character and saifah's younger brother) a contact for an escort job. their storyline basically disappears until episode 9, when name shows up at saifah's place with a gunshot wound, asking saifah to help him patch it up. name reveals to saifah that he couldn't shoot the man he was supposed to kill and that he doesn't want to do this job, but that he doesn't really have any other options

saifah then helps him get a job as khang's father's chauffeur and the two promise each other to travel the world together one day

the plot thickens as name tries to quit his job as a loan shark, but his boss tells him that he can do that only after one last job: rob khang's family's house. name tries to get saifah's help, but saifah refuses. for a series of unfortunate events, khang's father gets shot by name's boss, who would have shot saifah as well if name didn't say that saifah could get the blame for them if he didn't want sailom to get hurt. so saifah gets arrested, but eventually name redeems himself by killing his boss to save sailom, khang, and khang's father and by confessing what actually happened. saifah gets released and name goes to jail

in their very last scene together in episode 12, saifah goes to visit name in jail and tells him that the day name gets released, he (saifah) is gonna be there waiting for him so they can go travel the world together like they promised. when name asks him "why do we have so many promises?" saifah says "because we are best buds, right?" (SURE JAN). they then proceed to hold each other's hand through the prison net and stare into each other's eyes for like 20 seconds, which doesn't seem very friendly to me but what do i know

tl;dr: technically we didn't get pepperpapang as a pair because name ended up in jail and even if saifah vowed to wait for him to get released so they can travel the world together, the two of them only ever called each other 'friend', never mentioned having any romantic feelings for the other and didn't kiss.......... BUT I KNOW SAIFAH IS JUST WAITING FOR NAME TO GET OUT OF JAIL TO PLANT ONE ON HIM AND WHISK HIM AWAY FOR THEIR HONEYMOO-- I MEAN ROAD TRIP AND NO ONE CAN CHANGE MY MIND

[brionysea]

me when there's still a "mike wheeler is good and strong and brave, actually" moment in my mike stays in hawkins fic but it comes from dustin

[wizardnuke]

yalls tags on the caleb astrid post are all SO spot on thank you for understanding the uh. canon that was given to us. not saying that anyone doesnt. but i am.

[smileduponyou]

I have too many instances of other muses just... completely brushing off how dangerous Gregory actually is.

[cloudcountry]

my two moods while playing jihyun's route are "jihyun i love you, i want you to be safe and happy and love yourself, i want to make sure you know you can trust people and i want you to know that some things just couldn't be avoided because they were the decisions of other people and you couldn't have done anything to help or stop it even if you wanted to, and i know you aren't perfect but i love you anyways because you're trying to get better and improve and thats a beautiful thing." and "SHUT THE FUCK UP YOOSUNG."