#okay their whole deal. they don’t get along rn. like at all

[shalpilot]

temporary buddies

[world0fmadness]

⋆ ˚｡⋆ ✩ ˚ FIRE AND ICE

kimi raikkonen x cky / jackass member! wife! reader x ( platonic! ) oc daughter x ( platonic! ) oc son

featuring: a daughter called tilly because it’s just such a pretty name and some dico and rake slander

faceclaim: assorted but mainly lucy liu

୨୧ okay so the timeline on this one is a little messy but please just deal with it <3 i imagine they met when they were around 21, had their daughter when they were around 28 and married when they were around 30… so their daughter is around 16 years old… is that messy? a lot of this is from the pov of their daughter and fan accounts since social media wasn’t really a thing in the early 2000’s and stuff…

reading music recommendations: lost in a contraption by cky - along comes mary by bloodhound gang - your sweet 666 by him

loveuyn: thinking about how in an old interview yn said she was going to keep her first ever car so it can be her future child’s first car and now tilly has it and absolutely loves it 🥹 photos from tilly’s social media

ckylvr: it’s so crazy seeing her drive the car that was featured in SO much of the early cky stuff 💔 every time i see her post it i do the leonardo dicaprio point like “ oh! that’s the car bam jumped off while it sped down a road ”

❤️ liked by tillyraikkonenln

ynlnstomponme: i hope yn cleaned it REALLY good lmao… the amount of times people have been caught on video vomiting in it is genuinely nuts

> loveuyn: not to mention the blood lmao 😭

> ynlnsbackhand: if that car could talk…

> loveuyn: if that car could talk it’d be taking yn to court straight away for pain and suffering

tillyraikkonenln: the best part about being a late 2000’s baby is you get all your parents cool vintage stuff :D

ynraikkonenln ✔️: you’re grounded for a year

> tillyraikkonenln: i’m sorry mom :(

❤️ liked by ynraikkonenln and kimiraikkonen

> iluvf1: teens calling stuff their parents used when THEY were teens “vintage” just to annoy them is so funny to me

> loveuyn: crying rn, the time tilly was on live and someone commented to ask yn and kimi about AOL “ what the hell is AOL”… and yn immediately giving her a whole history on how she used to flirt with boys in her school over AOL while kimi and tilly just watched her ramble from the side

> oldf1lvr: she needed to educate her baby on the old ways real quick 😭

> kimicelover: kimi had SO MUCH love in his eyes on that livestream… i want what they have

oldf1lvr: tilly, who’s your favourite grid uncle?

> tillyraikkonenln: seb!

> sebastianvettel ✔️: the greatest medal of honour! thank you tilly, come visit soon - sebastian ❤️

> lewishamilton ✔️: what at am i? chopped liver?

> tillyraikkonenln: sorry uncle lew :3

❤️ liked by lewishamilton

> jackass4ever: favourite jackass uncle?

> tillyraikkonenln: CHRIS! definitely chris

❤️ liked by chrispontious

> chrispontious ✔️: thank you very much tilly, always knew you were smarter than your mother

> ynraikkonenln ✔️: get lost 🙄

ckylvr: the amount of HIM and CKY pin badges you can spot in that pile 💔 take me backkkk

jackass4ever: what’s the nastiest thing your mom did on cky? in your opinion…

> tillyraikkonenln: kissed dico and rake 😟

loveuyn: yn’s grid milf fashion highlight ❤️

tillyraikkonenln: i don’t think i’ll ever get used to people calling my mother a milf :(

> iluvf1: lmao poor tilly 😭

oldf1lvr: kimi in the third picture in a boring ass button up and jeans… i hate m*n

> ynlnsbackhand: she’s EVERYTHING, he’s just ken

iluvf1: i miss seeing her interact with fans in the paddock so much, bring our mom back 💔

> tillyraikkonenln: she misses interacting with people in the paddock! they’ll visit soon, her and dad have just been busy with KJ ❤️

> new2f1: KJ? who is that?

> oldf1lvr: it’s their son! they haven’t revealed his name or anything yet since he’s only 5 so they call him KJ because according to yn he’s a double of kimi

> iluvf1: kimi’s genes are incredible because tilly looks EXACTLY like him too 😭

> loveuyn: she’s a double of kimi look wise but has the exact same personality as yn

❤️ liked by tillyraikkonenln

loveuyn: gentle reminder of these adorable pictures yn posted when she was pregnant with KJ ( and the only pictures we have of him so far )

ynlnsbackhand: her comfy mom era was her best era, fight me

❤️ liked by tillyraikkonenln

oldf1lvr: baby KJ 🥹 you can’t even see his face but you can tell he totally IS a copy of kimi

kimicelover: i wonder if KJ will be the future racer, since tilly is more into skateboarding and photography?

❤️ liked by tillyraikkonenln

> iluvf1: maybe! but is the grid really prepared for another iceman 🫣

jackass4ever: i love how whenever she’s in the jackass movies she’s still a total hardass but the second it comes to her babies she just crumbles 🥹

> kimicelover: it’s the same with kimi! he’s still ice cold to most people but the second he sees tilly, KJ or yn he just melts and there’s SO much video evidence of it 💔

ynraikkonenln: my little girl helping me and kimi celebrate our anniversary by cooking dinner for us ❤️

tillyraikkonenln: i burned literally everything… and i’m not a little girl anymore, i’m 16 :(

> kimiraikkonen ✔️: we’re still grateful and you’ll always be our little girl kulta 💙

❤️ liked by ynraikkonenln and tillyraikkonenln

> tillyraikkonenln: oh and did you have to include that picture of me washing up?

> kimiraikkonen ✔️: yes, she did, it’s pretty unbelievable for a teen so we need people to see photo evidence

loveuyn: yn ln… then and now 🥹

tillyraikkonenln: black and white filter on the first pictures made me think my own mother was dead for a second…

> loveuyn: sorry tilly 😭

iluvf1: goddamn, this woman has aged like fine wine…

ynlnsbackhand: just me who thinks she’s got hotter with age?

> oldf1lvr: definitely not just you…

> kimicelover: kimi too though… they’re both so hot as older people… i want them BOTH so bad 😭

jackass4ever: genuinely HOW is this the woman that let dico pee on her in her sleep and only hit him with a belt after?

> oldf1lvr: sorry WHAT?

> loveuyn: the iceland incident…

> ynlnsbackhand: at least ryan got back at him properly for her

> ynlnslighter: those belt whips she gave dico were fucking crazy what do you mean 😭

> ynlnsbackhand: HE PISSED ON HER

> ckylvr: everyone was pissing on each other in iceland, wtf was in the air over there?

⋆ ˚｡⋆ ୨୧ ˚ NEW ADDED BONUS ˚ ୨୧ ⋆｡˚ ⋆

her parents are in love… gross

tillyraikkonenln: sigh… my parents are still SO in love even after like… 60 years… nasty

kimiraikkonen ✔️: cheeky girl… thank you for taking these pictures kulta 💙

> tillyraikkonenln: wonder who i get that from… you’re welcome isä <3

❤️ liked by ynraikkonenln and kimiraikkonen

ynraikkonenln ✔️: 60 YEARS? you’re pushing your luck missy… love you

❤️ liked by kimiraikkonen and tillyraikkonenln

kimiynlover: if i don’t ever have a love like theirs i have failed at life 💔

sebastianvettel ✔️: KJ is getting big! sending my love ❤️ - sebastian

❤️ liked by ynraikkonenln, tillyraikkonenln and kimiraikkonen

[screeching-bunny]

Helloooo my fave yandere!character writer! I hope your having a wonderful day! Can i request yandere!jock with male!reader and he finds the reader crying bc someone was bullying them or said smth mean or smth like that? Ik he would be pissed but i was thinking something along the lines of this:

*Reader explains what happens*

*Yandere!Jock absolutely pissed and turns to go beat the shit out of them*

Then the reader would grab is arm to stop him and say smthing like: “wait!…please…..please just….stay with me….please?” Like EEEEEEE I LOVE YANDERE!JOCK SMMMM AND IMA PASS OUT IF YOU DO THIS! OKAY THANKS BYE

(Also plz ignore if your requests are closed rn)

Yandere! Jock x Male Reader

Asks 2

Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Reader is specifically going to be Male in this post!!!

Asks 1

Yandere! Jock liked looking at you whether it be intention or not his eyes were almost always on you. He loved looking at every expression you made throughout your day to day life and practically memorized every fine detail on your face. So it was no surprise that he was instantly alerted when he saw a hint of sadness appear on your face when you came in for your afternoon class. Like a little leach he started attaching himself towards you with a concerned look on his face to find out what had happened to his little darling but alas his attempts reamied futile as you refused to give him an answer that he accepted.

“I’m just tired and just didn’t get that much sleep last night.”

Tired his ass. Yandere! Jock knew for a fact that you fell asleep early last night while watching an animal documentary. How does he know this? Well, he was stalking I mean watching over you last night. Anyways the sentence “The giant horse cock weighs over eight pounds” was still fresh in his mind but that's not the point! The point is something or someone made you upset! This is honestly so absolutely unacceptable!! When class finishes he ends up cornering you to try and figure out what has happened to you. Soon you start to give in and tell him the exact reason as to why with tears bawling out of your eyes.

When he finds out the reason he is beyond pissed. A bunch of npc bullies had the audacity to go and bully you! There is nothing he wants to do then skin those losers alive for making you cry like this. How fucking dare they. Yandere! Jock immediately decides that at that moment, he would go on a manhunt. He genuinely believes that it’d be a good riddance, no way in hell is someone going to miss them. As he tries to get up, he is immediately stopped by you as you grab ahold of his arm.

“Please stay, I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Holy shit! That sentence damn near put him in a coma. He just can’t believe how adorable you are. With that, he decides right away to bring you to his home in order to comfort you. The rest of the day is spent with just the two of you guys together while watching Netflix and ordering out to eat. All of his plans that he had before were canceled in favor of being by your side. He does his best to make you happy and laugh as much as possible. That smiling face of yours suits you better than a teary eyed expression. Although he can’t do it now, he vows to absolutely destroy the lives of your bullies. The mental and physical wellbeing of yourself matter more than anything in the world to him. Anything that causes harm to you he quickly deals with even if it means people. All that he wants is that you’ll be safe in his arms and by his side whenever he wakes up.

He makes it a point to prove the words of you tormentors were false and does his best to undo their claims. He’d be so appalled by the whole situation and just can’t wrap around his head at how someone could be mean to you. Like just look at you! You’re literally perfect what the hell were they smoking when they decided to verbally assault you. Yandere! Jock would be so overbearing and clingy towards you. Wherever you went he was close behind you. You’re going grocery shopping? Cool he’s right by your side. You gotta go to class? He’s right by you. Even if he doesn’t have the class he’s still coming. Showering? Move over and make room, he wants to shower as well. Is totally the type to throw a fit when you say no which causes you to relent and let him follow you.

In a few weeks after this incident there were missing people reports all over town of local college students. The same ones who coincidentally were vicious towards you. Everytime Yandere! Jock walks past these posters, he has a hidden smug look on his face. Justifies it by saying that he’s doing it in the name of love and that those people were the spawns of Satan. Besides, they're not even dead yet. They’re just trapped in a cabin in some random woods that only he has access to. Content with himself he spends his days by your side and pledging to himself that he’d never let anyone bother you ever again.

[lemon-natalia]

Harrow the Ninth Reaction - Chapter 4

i feel like Ianthe is possibly the worst person to stage a mental health crisis intervention, but here she is

‘Good morning, my comrade’ ah yes, what a normal way to greet people Ianthe

Harrow’s extreme discomfort/dislike of people seeing her actual face w/o face paint puts her insistence Gideon wear it in the last book into perspective - it's wasn’t just her being pedantic, it’s a really big deal for her

the letter is written in her own handwriting??? i thought at first it was a message from the Emperor but i guess not. this whole situation just keeps getting stranger

ok, its written in Harrow’s own cipher, and the letters Ianthe specifically aren’t written in code, which strongly suggests that it really was written by her. still, what with all the mind/soul melding stuff in these books (specifically how Harrow could replicate a key Palamedes remembered), i feel like its not impossible for someone to have replicated it

and this is letter number two, not number one - Ianthe has two, one that is in case Harrow dies, and another … unmentioned one. i don’t trust that Ianthe isn’t lying about something here, or has taken a letter that wasn’t for her, or something along those lines

letter two was written 48 hours after becoming a Lyctor. i don’t have my copy of GtN with me rn so i can’t check if thats before or after the epilogue with Harrow and the Emperor?

current perspective Harrow seems to be a lot more unstable, or at least a lot less coherent than when Harrow was writing these letters - between her forgetting writing them, and her memories seemingly being messed up, Something else seems to have happened to her in between then and now, her general state rn isn’t just a reaction to the events of the last book like i had assumed.

She has to check Ianthe’s jaw to make sure its her, without her knowing - firstly, why her jaw? Secondly, are they gonna kiss??

Oh she did kiss her okay!

Harrow thinks she’s never interacted with Camilla? has she forgotten all the events of Canaan House other than becoming a Lyctor? now i’m wondering if Ianthe remembers what happened at all

i mean at least Ianthe does care about her sister, if in a mildly weird way

oh wtf i get she can heal herself but Ianthe was very ready to just stab herself. and stabbing Harrow was very uncalled for - but it took her far more effort to heal her hand up, again i feel like Harrow is not really a proper Lyctor yet

[heliads]

Idk if requests are open rn (I can't convert time lol) but I was wondering if I could request something for Now You See Me? Maybe smth with Jack where they're both just a super silly couple, like always goofing around before shows and just having fun, but they're both kinda insecure, like 'what if the other person doesn't take this as serious as they do'. So they...idk talk it through and in general super fluffy. Sorry, i'm really bad at describing things. Feel free to ignore if I sent this in too early.

masterlist

If you ask the Horsemen what they like most about being, well, a Horseman, you would get completely different answers. Some of you love the planning process, being able to organize the perfect heist right down to the very last detail. Others love the car chases afterwards, running as fast as they please without ever getting caught. Still more of you have a fondness for the magic tricks of the shows themselves.

If you were to pick, though, your favorite part about this fantastical life of yours wouldn’t be what happens on the stage, nor immediately before and after it. The magic is lovely, obviously, and you all enjoy the sound of so many people cheering your names, but what you like most of all about this select group of extraordinary people are the members of the group themselves. The backstage murmuring, the whispered inside jokes. That, to you, is worth more than any perfected sleight of hand trick.

That’s the reason for the contented feeling in your stomach as you survey your little crew. The five of you just made it out of another successful deal. This one will have the skeptics talking for months, of that you’re certain; all of you went above and beyond to make this job impossible to deny. It’s a good feeling. It lets all of you lay down your guard for the time being and just laugh with each other while you wait for the coast to clear outside.

Merritt tips his glass appreciatively as another siren caterwauls outside your hideout. “I think that’s the tenth one I’ve heard in ten minutes. Face it, people. We’re famous. Or, I am, at least. They might be too distracted by my good looks to notice you.”

Danny rolls his eyes. “They’d only get distracted by your looks if you hypnotized them.”

“Why don’t I do it to you, then?” Merritt pretends to lunge towards him, laughing when Danny jerks backwards.

“Not funny,” Danny complains.

“Totally funny,” you argue. “Are you scared because you’re worried it already happened? What if you secretly think Merritt has been super attractive this whole time and you’re just fighting the truth?”

Merritt snorts. “I like that idea.”

By your side, Jack breaks into a wide grin. “It’s okay, Danny. You can talk to us. We’re friends. Tell us your inner truth.”

Danny scoffs. “That is so not my inner truth.”

You arch a brow. “Are you sure? It wouldn’t be the first time you’ve fallen for a Horseman.”

Danny glowers at you. “Low blow, Y/N. And that’s rich coming from you, anyway, given that you’re also dating a Horseman.”

This is true. Unlike Danny, though, you’re quite proud of it. Your relationship with Jack Wilder was quite literally months in the making. It nearly drove the other Horsemen insane with the way both of you couldn’t stop tiptoeing around your feelings, but you both confessed eventually and have been quite happy ever since. Even when your friends try to divert blame onto the two of you to get out of the hot seat.

Jack must be thinking along the same lines, because he just shakes his head and grins. “It’s okay to be jealous of our fantastic relationship, Daniel. It’s not your fault we like each other way more than anyone loves you.”

Merritt chokes on his drink, and has to press a hand to his mouth to stop from laughing any more. “I didn’t laugh. That’s not funny, you two. You should all be nicer.” The twinkle in his eyes, though, lets you know that he’s firmly on your side.

Danny just groans. “Trust me, if this is what love is like, I’m fine without it. I feel like I’m going to be sick to my stomach. Remind me again why I wanted you two together so badly?”

Merritt chuckles. “Because you said the same things when they were just pining uselessly, remember? Ah, good times. And now the two of you can actually tell each other how much you love each other, right?”

He stares directly at Jack, waiting for him to say something. It’s strange, usually Jack has no problem picking up the thread of a joking conversation, always jumping in with another rebuttal, a laughing riposte, but this time, he just stays silent. He seems lost in thought, and maybe it’s just you being paranoid but it seems awfully coincidental that he would zone out just as Merritt brings up the idea of him being in love with you.

And, well, you get it. Love’s a big idea. Especially with your lives on the road now, it’s hard to picture any of you settling down in any way. You and Jack started out just flirting, only catching feelings by accident. You can’t expect him to love you. Even if you know that you’ve loved him for quite a while now.

Truth be told, this isn’t the first time such an issue has crossed your mind. You and Jack have been dating for a couple of months now, and you’ve been questioning things since the halfway point. It’s not Jack’s fault, really, it’s just hard sometimes to understand why he would pick you when there are literally hundreds of thousands of people begging to go out with him at every show. He could have any supermodel, any celebrity, but he chose you. It just makes a person wonder why.

It’s been getting to you lately, the instability of it all. You and Jack have a lovely time joking around, kissing after shows in between bouts of laughter, but he’s never once told you that he actually loves you. There’s a very good chance that he hardly sees this as a relationship at all, more a distraction in between extensive shows, and that to you is more heartbreaking than if he’d never confessed his feelings in the first place. You love Jack, you know you do. You just don’t know that he feels the same way about you.

The conversation drifts off into uneasy silence when Jack still says nothing. When it becomes clear that he’s not going to respond to that, you quickly change the subject, asking Daniel about his thoughts on the way a certain aspect of the job had gone. It’s an easy excuse, and will earn you at least fifteen minutes of uninterrupted Atlas monologue to smooth over the awkwardness, but you still feel your spirits sinking. It wouldn’t have hurt Jack to say something, right? Even just to joke along. He wouldn’t have to have meant it.

Merritt meets your eyes sympathetically, but you look away just as quickly. You don’t want his pity, it just means that he’s aware of the imbalance just as much as you are. Danny’s oblivious enough that he probably won’t notice it, which is good. You don’t want anyone realizing the difference in your affection from Jack’s. Not when you plainly like him more than he does.

It’s not a good feeling, to say the least. It sits with you the rest of the evening, causing you to leave early, claiming exhaustion and wanting an early night’s sleep. Jack tries to coax you to stay a little longer, but you can’t answer his jokes with the same spirit you usually do, making his face fall slightly. Well, a cruel voice whispers in the back of your head, good. He should feel at least a little of the hurt you do right now.

Even that doesn’t make you feel better, though. You lie awake, listening to the soft sounds of your friends laughing together. Jack never has a problem carrying the conversation when it’s just them, then. That means the problem must be you. You joke too much or not enough, and somehow Jack saw that you weren’t quite the right match for him. Maybe somewhere out there is a person who’s perfect for him, who can always pick up what he’s putting down and knows exactly the right amount of emotion to show, but Jack is making it clear that won’t be you. 

You fall asleep eventually, but even a good night's sleep isn’t enough to reset your mood. You do your best to act like nothing is the matter, but it’s hard to go on joking with Jack when all you want to do is ask him if he could ever actually see himself loving you. 

It takes about a week before he catches on. You’re bailing out of another night of drinks with the Horsemen because you can’t bear to see how flimsy your relationship really is. 

Instead of letting you go, though, Jack stays put in your room. “Do you want to tell me what’s going on?”

You feign indifference. “Nothing, really. I’m just tired.”

Jack doesn’t seem convinced. “You’ve been ‘just tired’ for a while now. It’s not like you.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you don’t know me as well as you thought,” you mumble, trying to distract yourself by pretending to look at the papers on your desk. 

“What does that mean?” Jack’s voice, suddenly razor-sharp, takes you by surprise. 

You lift a shoulder cautiously. “Nothing. Just leave me alone, alright? You’ll have more fun if you’re not stuck with me right now, I know that.”

“That’s not true at all,” Jack protests. “Every time the rest of us go out, I’m miserable. They can all tell you that. It’s no good if you’re not out there with me, Y/N.”

You can’t help a tinge of bitterness from entering your voice. “So you want me to go out with you because you want entertainment? Great, Jack, that definitely makes me feel better.”

He reacts as if you’ve struck him. “That’s not what I mean at all. What’s gotten into you?”

“What’s gotten into me?” You spit out. “Nothing, Jack. Nothing at all. It’s just that I realized you don’t feel half as much about me as I do about you, and surprisingly enough, that doesn’t make me feel the greatest.”

He’s silent, reeling in place. You shake your head slowly. “See, this is why I didn’t want to do all this. Just forget it, alright?”

You try to move past, but Jack’s hand snaps out, weaving around you and blocking your path. “I had no idea you felt like that,” he says softly. “I would have said something sooner, sweetheart, I promise. All this time, I’ve been thinking you didn’t like me that much, so I didn’t want to say something stupid like I love you since I thought it would scare you off. If I had known–” he breaks off in a quiet half-laugh, then continues, “–if I had known that’s what you thought, I would have told you a lot more about just how you make me feel.”

Suddenly, it seems to take a lot of effort to speak again. The weight of your surprise hangs against your throat, slowing the syllables. “You love me?”

“More than anything,” he smiles. “Enough that I didn’t want to hear you say you didn’t love me when I knew how much I loved you. I never asked what you wanted, and I assumed you didn’t want a serious relationship.”

“I want you,” you tell him. He beams.

“And I want you, sweetheart.” In Jack’s arms, it’s easy to forgive him. This has all been a simple misunderstanding, and the greater truth is far lovelier than you could have ever hoped. Maybe you will go out with him tonight after all, tonight and every night until forever. The stars will shine sweetly overhead and you will be happy. With Jack, you think you always will be.

now you see me tag list: @mayfieldss

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[storiesofsvu]

Okay, so last week my sleep schedule was beyond fucked up and I had a friend staying with me so I didn’t get to watch the new CM until WAY too late and my reactions were barely existent and I almost fell asleep before it ended cause it was almost 6am by then. So I’m rewatching last week rn (while working on other stuff) before watching the new ep. Expect some notes from last week but not a lot I guess lol!

We love a good female unsub.

I STILL do not understand how Emily got full ass arrested over this shit, like yeah brian accused her, but they don’t really have any grounds for arrest, esp her being fbi?? She should have been asked to come down for questioning but that was it. She never should have actually been booked. (though this DOES play into the whole conspiracy thing. Like get her arrested/out of the way/a reason for the upper people to get rid of her or have something to hold over her head. Like, her getting arrested would be part of the whole gold star thing). WITHOUT that though, make it make sense.  GOD to be a lawyer in the CM universe must be THE most annoying thing in the entire world LOL.

This red coat will forever and always be one of my top fave wardrobe items of em’s

Okay but like, the coke “conspiracy theory” seems pretty legit LOL. But em is like.. losing it. She’s tunnel visioned on this gold star case and isn’t sleeping and like, my girl just needs rest and peace for ONCE please.

Jj wanting to talk but not having the courage to bring it up just hurts me man.

“contracted to kill gold star” I thought gold star was an operation? Or a team? Or was that found out later in this episode….LOL

Honestly… Emily breaking the rules/law is not OOC at all. and her asking Garcia to help her (and Garcia complying) isn’t either, it’s happened before in canon. And like.. when em’s getting shoved to the utmost bottom, she’s never above breaking protocol, even if she is in charge. Look at the lauren arc, look at her battle with barnes, her standing up to strauss, she’s always done whatever she thinks is right, it’ll get her answers, even if they can’t be used in court.

Voit looks SO much like someone I work with and that weirds me out LOL.

Mega points for Sydney for standing up for herself. I’m super glad she’s been given some time to shine this season.

Okay either Emily has had some sense knocked into her w saying “this case isn’t gold star until we prove it” or she thinks its an utter waste of time…

You’re SERIOUSLY telling me Penelope Garcia of all people didn’t see “star light star bright” and think of the nursery rhyme? That she wasted how ever many of her guesses and didn’t come up with something along the lines of “wish tonight”?!!!? that shit’s TOO easy…

If last season gave Emily a migraine, dealing with all of this and esp brian should be giving her an aneurysm lol.

The girl playing holly is incredible, I hope she gets the career she deserves. Also.. she deserved to attack voit, like her sister is young enough she’s still living in a weird confused/delusional point where she doesn’t really get what’s going on. holly’s old enough she knows her entire life is completely fucked up by her dad being a killer. That her family’s torn apart, she’s watching her mom barely keep it together, they have to move, again and again, new school, new friends, over and over all in a feeble attempt to try and stay safe from their dad who’s supposed to stay in prison?

Yeah this girl’s absolutely going through it. She loves her dad and misses what they had before everyone found out what he was actually doing.

Not voit getting TWO fucks in one sentence! He is right though about holly being in trouble and needing help now. Maybe he’s self reflecting a little bit, I can’t remember if his past was discussed last season LO, I’m remembering something but I might be fucking up plot lines… EITHER WAY, he sees a bit of himself in holly and doesn’t want her to turn out like him, which could be considered remorse…

JJ asking about Emily and how she’s doing after em asks about Sydney and the girls… just absolutely proves what everyone online was BITCHING hardcore about, with em “not caring about jj” they’re both going through hell, they’re both exhausted, I bet jj didn’t sleep the night before either. JJ wants to know about em and is checking in with her, she knows everyone’s going through it and when asked about her shit, she brushes it off cause she knows both of them are under stress, that she can bring it up later rather than dump everything on em when she’s struggling to hold herself and the team together. Sometimes you have to wait on things like that.. it’s just life.

If tyler and Penelope had met under ANY different circumstance I would be here for it, but I refuse to be the way it was done.

Emily v Voit is giving me so much life. Why didn’t they just send her in first? Lol. Like yeah voit ends up getting what he wants, but also, she’s so fucking cocky about the way it  happens and she can read him like no tomorrow and that’s after no sleep and all that shit? Tell me your powerful without telling me your powerful.

Okay, imma check if the new ep is up yet, if it is, I’ll be back right away, if not, I’ll see ya in a couple of hours…

Alright, I decided to finish writing some headcanons and got distracted and opened twitter to a gif of Emily smoking from the new ep and it was the hottest thing ive ever seen so let’s pray the new ep is up…

HERE WE GOOOOO

Oh we’re starting WAY back with last season flashbacks? Oh GOD this is gonna be a rough episode isn’t it??

Emily needs a hug, a nap and an orgasm.

Jfc this got creepy right off the bat… like voit was slightly okay in the past eps and now he’s just playing into the psycho

Im sorry, the fbi assassinated WHO? I cannot function without my subtitles and there are TOO many names/people in this season over the total season arc that I keep losing track….

Okay so at least it’s not just em’s ID they haven’t updated, rossi’s is old as fuck too..

“its not the first time I’ve crossed ethical and legal boundaries for this case” Rebecca: “and I didn’t hear that…” LOOOOLL

 AND THIS IS WHY  I SAID ID NEVER WANT TO BE A LAWYER IN THIS UNIVERSE

I understand that they said any previous deal would be off the table if voit fucked around with them but are you SERIOUSLY trusting him to provide the message and it not be something to alert them?

Okay but shout out to voit for being the first person to refer to tara as “Dr Lewis” in like.. forever

“you neglected to ask me that” dude’s right… you didn’t ask. That’s on you.

I really like the way they’re profiling this situation from both points and jumping back and fourth,

LOOOOLLL the morse code. Fucking called it.

ANND LUKE GETS A FUCK! YES

“can you do that? without fingerprints?” homegirl is about to get herself fired, isn’t she? (she don’t care either so…)

I know Rebecca being close to voit is like, a legal thing and the jurisdiction and shit but it worries me. Imma be surprised if she makes it through this season.

Jfc Emily is SO hot. I adore they keep putting her in blue!

Voit being the comedic relief was not on my bingo card.

YEESS JJ WITH THE “SO SHUT THE FUCK UP”

Not fuckin voit giving the ship a name.. my dude.. stop.

Lmao, Rebecca, he’s not actually gonna confess a crime babe…

“youre not under arrest, you’re here as a person of interest on a 24 hr hold” WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHOULDVE HAPPENED TO EMILY

“useful idiot” IM TELLING YOU EM TO BRIAN IS FRANKIE TO THE DEAN

Not him gaslighting her!

I know part of it is tv, but part of it is reality that plain clothed officers look EXACTLY like cops. Like, everyone can tell that you’re looking over your shoulder and being suspicious. Someone watching for cops isn’t gonna be that dumb.

Wow that team really had ONE good shooter? You serious?? Jj could have got that in a second.

The way Penelope knows about bombs?? That definitely came from derek.

UGH NOO BUT YESS the look on rebecca’s face when tara said she was staying with the bomb. There’s still love there and I swear to fuck if there’s some dying confession of love that’s my 13th reason

Not jade literally being in the same fucking park…

Ive been saying it for years but without Garcia… the team wouldn’t solve a single fucking case.

Okay I GET THAT THERE’S A FUCKING BOMB but like.. both tara and luke and ALL the surrounding officers are SO focused o that and are COMPLETELY ignoring voit.. that bitch could and would have been completely gone if it wasn’t for rossi and the sniper with him…

“this piece of shit” YES. Listen, I know we’re all feral for swearing, but as someone with a potty mouth who works in an industry when we’re always swearing, it’s so natural to me, and it makes things seem more real.

OH FUCK NO

HOW WAS THAT DUDE SO FUCKING DUMB?!?!? WHY WASN’T THERE LIKE 50 OFFICERS AROUND TO MAKE SURE SHIT LIKE THIS DIDN’T HAPPEN. MY GODDDD

But now voits back in his cell…

Ugghhh rebeccccaaaaaa

“im not at my best right now” “pfft. LOOK AROUND”

How DARE THEY end the ep like that. like the smoking part and her not giving a FUCK about it being inside and in her office was one thing, but the dire attempt to keep her composure and keep it together until she got out of the building only to utterly break down in dave’s arms?!?! Im sobbing. I honestly don’t think we’ve seen her cry *like that* since she was abducted by scratch…. They really turned to paget and said “hope you’re ready to act this season…”

Fuck.

I.. what an episode.. part of me feels the intense need to write some form of fix it fic… woof.

[memberment]

DOES ANYONE WANNA PLAY A GAME??? (This is the post I was just yapping about.)

So we’re playing a game! Perhaps, if anyone wants to play! 

For reference, we have all gotten pretty used to me having one fic per day of the week, with exclusion of Sundays, bc I gen hate posting on Sundays. (I don’t wanna talk about it!<3) 

But. As of more recent months, I’ve shackled myself to behemoth fics that realistically, y’all would be waiting for new shit for millennia if I start posting shit in the order I’m writing it. So that’s just not gonna work! (I also do not want to be shackled to ao3 forever, but I cannot just write shit and leave it to rot in my google docs because I am not evil. Sharing is caring.) 

So without saying any more than that (bc I gotta leave y’all with some mystery), I would like y’all to help me narrow down this list of twenty to ten. (These are all of my open concepts that I’m willing to touch at the moment. There are a few more sprinkled about, but I don’t even wanna think about them rn.) I have listed titles, if I have them (if not, it's noted) and brief either descriptions or yaps. Literally just throw numbers of shit you wanna see or specifically think I should not be working on first at me. Do not care. Whatever floats your boat. <3

-

A Girl and Her Dog - Bebe runs into a lunatic and a dog while trying to complete a task (there’s actually a leak for this in my test fic).

Ca$h4Cultz - The main four accidentally manifest a god after starting a cult. (Again, leaks are in my test fic. This one might not be super long, but whenever I think about it, it makes me laugh really hard.)

Tweek’s Eclipse?? - I don’t have a title for this yet. It is literally Tweek’s story from Eclipse. Including the shit before. I’m not super invested in it yet, but the first chapter I did write kinda hits. There’s leaks for it somewhere in my slew of posts on here.

What Are You? (not sold on this title) - Tweek meets an imp after spending his whole life alone. He doesn’t really care if the imp takes his soul, but for some reason, he can’t. This aggravates the imp to no end so now he’s just dragging Tweek along to figure out exactly why he can’t take Tweek’s soul. (The imp is Craig. I personally think what I have written so far is fucking funny. It’s not gonna be good, but I stand by it.) 

Son Of Satan - Craig meets an imp. Or at least, that’s what the imp’s calling himself. (This is probably gonna be a fun nonsense piece with no legitimate plot and will probably get thrown on the trashfic pseud, but it will be fun. The entire fic is concepted off of one single piece of fanart I saw, if I can find it again, I will gladly share.) 

Untitled mind reader fic - I do not have a set title for this because I’m only two chapters deep. Basically, Tweek has to deal with some shit after someone starts reading his mind and decides to speak up. 

Untitled Horror Duo- Okay, so neither of these have titles yet, but basically, it’s two fics. There is the main story and the prequel. They both line up though in the way that I have the guides structured. These are so old, but I have like 30k between the two of them and I kinda don’t want to just leave that to rot, y’know? The main storyline follows Tweek who just entered high school after being locked away his entire life. He’s possessed by something, making adjusting to normal human life ten times more difficult. But still, he manages to find friends that care about him and want to help him, despite everything. And the prequel actually follows Kenny who’s had some close encounters with the something that’s possessing Tweek in the main story. I think this could be really fun. I remember being very deliberate about weaving these stories together when I was working on it and it was fucking ANNOYING!!! But it might also be really bad (I haven’t touched what I have since around March so I gen don’t know???), so I may assign it to  the trash psued. BUT IT’S AN OPTION!!! 

Three Kings Of Chaos - Chaos Inc. has three leaders. General Disarray, Major Mayhem, and Professor Chaos (of course). But being super villains can be complicated. Especially when their angel donor decides he wants to join in on the fun. (This will realistically probably not be very good. But, I find the concept to be very entertaining.) 

Then We Won’t (I’m not sold on the title) - When a kid gets outcasted for his powers, he makes an unlikely alliance. (This entire fic got concepted around the saying ‘The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.’) 

Untitled Civil War Fic - Basically, C&F are all evil. The Freedom Pals are just trying to get their friends back. Just about every ship in this winds up getting thrown in enemies to lovers territory. Except for Butters and Bebe (and I personally think their storyline is fucking hilarious). 

New Beginnings Rewrite - I HAVE VERY LARGE IDEAS FOR THIS. THE OLD ONE IS STILL UP SO I WILL NOT BE ELABORATING.  

Human Island - (no set title) After the world is destroyed, humans are limited to a small chain of islands. But what happens when a scientist threatens to destroy the harmony they’d worked so hard to build? (This is loosely based on something and if someone were to catch it if I were to write and post this, I would lose my fucking shit. Like, I think I would be so happy I would, like, throw up.) 

Vents - (no set title) SOMEONE gets thrown into a psychiatric facility. Involuntarily, of course. They assume they’re just abandoned there to die until someone starts calling out to them through the vents. 

I might actually finish Stalkers (this is not the title but I’ve been referring to it as such since it got concepted). Heads up though. This one is trash. Like out of everything I’ve ever written, this is thee trash. It was actually the precursor for Leap Year in the sense that I wanted to write something problematic for the sake of being problematic. It will be on the trash fic psued. Like, I genuinely find it funny because of how bad it is. But I can’t recommend telling me to work on this, because it genuinely isn’t good and I stand by that. 

My Love Letter To You - There are not one, but two Professor Chaos’ in this story. How fucking wild. Wonder how that happened. This story is basically the set up to them fighting it out and what led them there. (I’ve been eyeing and fiddling with this for a while and if you read my end notes you can prob figure out when I started messing with this concept). 

Untitled Cartman and Kenny FP fic. - Okay, so this was actually one of my first fanfic concepts. Basically, Cartman spends a good amount of time blacked out. When the other Freedom Pals find out, they try to intervene. And of course, Kenny has something to do with it. 

Cntrl: Escape - I think this might genuinely be my favorite out of all of these. A group of people get elected to escape their “perfect” world. (There is a tyrannical ruler and AI involved. Also the opening scene rn is artist Tweek trying not to lose his shit over the AI art contests surrounding his block. I love it. This one’s prob Tweek centric, but there are six(?? I’m not checking my notes. Approximately six???) mains in this.) (There is also a tiny leak of this on my test fic.) 

Untitled Kyle Supersomething Fic - As states. Human Kite’s either gonna be a supervillain or a vigilante who does not fuck with the rules of hero society and does things his own way. Could be fun. Oh also, from the jump I have decided the bad guys (Kyle) win in this. Like, I feel like villains winning is severely lacking and I need to contribute to what I want to read because that is the entire reason I started writing fanfic. 

Untitled Evil Shed Fic - And our favorite gadgeteer superhero is not a superhero anymore. He’s much worse. Stan is irredeemable in this, or at least that’s where it’s taking shape in my head right now. This is prob gonna border on horror if not be straight up horror. I do have plans to make all of the people I really focus on character wise (that isn’t Butters, obviously) have their own villain fic at some point, but rn all I have buzzing around my little idiot brain are Kenny (which is done), Stan, and Kyle’s. (Wendy’s is also starting to take shape in my head, but not enough to concept it out yet.)

New Kid - A small town (South Park, obviously) falls into chaos when an alien stumbles upon them. This is New Kid centric without it actually being New Kid centric. I have been giggling about this concept since the idea graced me back in March when the warm weather first popped around and I heard the song ‘Trailer Park Alien’ for the first time. Which is exactly what this fic is based on. 

[thosesillylittlegayghosts]

FINALE THOUGHTS

DO NOT START IT WITH THEM CRYING HOW AM I MEANT TO DEAL

well there goes my one last night theory

Just because it’s over doesn’t mean its really over and if I think it over maybe-

Actually just kill me off it would hurt less HIS VOICE

NOT THE FISH FUCK OFF

they’re bestie goals i adore them also im sorry but the song being called perfect movie scene and them two looking like they’re in a rom com (from far away) will actually be the death of me

Fuck she’s wearing purple again and he’s wearing beige

SIMON PLS I WANT TO WRAP YOU IN A BLANKET YOU DESERVE SOME COMFORT

damn okay Sara admitting Simon’s right??? NO don’t call yourself stupid you’re finally getting the recognition you deserve

Them having their lesson outside is so real it’s my favourite thing about summer

AHHHH I WAS SO RIGHT THEYRE CLOSING HILLERSKA

SEVERAL WARNINGS

Vincent fuck off fuck off fuck off. Nils please defend him

NO THEYRE GONNA BLAME FELICE AND WILHELM

NOT NILS AND WILHELM YELLING AT EACH OTHER YOU GET ALONG

not August crying

Omg omg he just pulled a Queen Kristina he did what she did is this foreshadowing cause now he’s having a mental breakdown???

Stella and Fredricka get together whilst comforting each other??

Nah I actually love the third years having a group hug that’s amazing

And Henry and Walter talking to their parents (?) but still being together it’s so cute to see all their little favourites

Oh it’s so gonna end at the end of term, hillerskas closing and Simon’s moving away so they’re having like one last day together all of them

Wilhelm you’re killing me here

Has his room changed? I swear he used to have one window

NOT KRIS

NEON PARTY NEON PARTY

Not Vincent and nils calling him out

VINCENT YOURE ACTUALLY TALKING SOME SENSE FOR ONCE

okay so Augusts gonna back out and then Wille can threaten to do whatever he wants

AHHH TALK TO HIM THROUGH THE BOOKCASE WILLE GO ON

noooo they’re both returning crisis

HES WEARING PURPLE

HENRY FUCK OFF

NOOOO HE WAS GONNA SAY SOMETHING

okay maybe my one night theory wasn’t entirely off…

Not the housemaster doing shots with them??? No wonder the schools getting shut down

Yes Wilhelm Felice besties era again!!!

LOVE OF MY LIFE AHH

no he thinks he’s gonna kill his mum

HOW DID SHE HIDE A WHOLE BOTTLE OF WINE??

PARTY PRINCE RETURN OF THR PARTY PRINCE TITLE

not her hiding the wine Felice I love you

I love all these people so much man

Alexa play closure by Henry Moodie

HE DID THE THING THE THING WITH THE GRASS

REVOLUTION?!?!!

ERIK WOULD HAVE LOVED YOU NO MATTER WHAT

theyre near tears so im near tears

PLEASE SARA YOURE MEANT TO BE IN LOVE WITH HIM WHAT DO YOU MEAN STRONGER FEELINGS

they’re bestie goals and couple goals and I’ve never really shipped them but honestly I could be convinced-this all happening where they first became friends is just too much

Stella I had hopes for you man

NILS YOU HAVE….??? I seriously thought he was gonna say I have feelings for you

AH HE CAME OUT AND THEYRE ACTUALLY SUPPORTIVE AND ACTUALLY ACTING LIKE FRIENDS I LOVE IT

God he’s so in love HA REJECTED AT LEAST HE APOLOGISED

military service he’s doing military service now?

I CALLED THIS WEEKS AGO THAT THEYD GET BACK TOGETHER THEN SHED REJECT HIM BUT THE LAST EPISODE TRICKED ME

I LOVE YOU ITLL PASS FUCK OFF WHY ARE YOU BRINGING UP THAT TRAUMA RN?!

ONE LAST NIGHT TOGETHER I WAS SO RIGHT

OMG THE LAKE SCENE NOT THE LAKE SCENE

NOT IT TAKES A FOOL TO REMAIN SCENE THE CYCLICAL STRUCTURE IS HURTING ME

NO THIS HURTS SO MUCH MORE THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD

HOW CAN IT JUST BE OVER NAH THIS IS MY CAUSE OF DEATH

STEDRIKA GOT TOGETHER AND FELICE IS JUST SMILING I LOVE HER

Them showing Henry and Walter right after Stella and Fredricka get together means they’re also canon actually

REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID EVERYONE WAS FAKE??? REMEMBER WHEN YOU SAID YOU COULD BE FREE I HOPE YOU GET THERE. It’s not looking good for the endgame guys

WE WERE A REVOLUTION?! IT SHOULDNT BE A REVOLUTION TO LOVE EACH OTHER???

He’s gonna do something OMG OMG WHAT DOES THAT MEAN HE THREW IT AWAY DOES HE MEAN HES DONE WITH THE CROWN?! WILL I HAVE TO EAT MY WORDS AND WATCH HIM ABDICATE?!

Queen redemption arc???

Say no say no say-damn at least maybe now he’ll get support??

What is it with frogs and this royal family??

Goodbye Simon MY HEART MAN COME ON

I HOPE YOU HAVE A NICE SUMMER YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT I CANNOT EVEN IM ACTUALLY NEVER GONNA RECOVER FROM THIS

Girls trip!!!

AHHH HES SO GONNA ABDICATE

but August might…

AHHHH WILHELM I LOVE YOU IVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER TO BE WRONG

NAH ITS A ROMCOM HE PULLED A LOVE ACTUALLY IM NEVER RECOVERING FROM THIS

AHHHHH

FOR HIS OWN SAKE IM SO PROUD

NOT THE FLASHBACKS IM GONNA CRY

THE FINAL LOOK I CALLED IT

[werebutch]

WSBH chara q’s: (you don’t have to answer all the numbers, just whatever you want to 𖢘)

16/35/51 for Scotch

1/6/55 for Atlas

I LOVE YOU

16. What kinds of people do they have arguments with in their head?

okay i truly think scotch argues with seraph in his head all the time. ALL the time. scotch largely ignores them, and vice versa, because he dislikes them and they know it. seraph is very conflict avoidant lol, and as long as hes not a "threat" they dont care to talk to him about their problems. he probably argues with atlas and jacob (his older brother) too, atlas about more stupid small stuff, and jacob about childhood and life stuff :p

im trying to think of more general groups he would argue with but i cant come up with anything BAHAH. hes not exactly conflict avoidant in the annoying libra way that seraph is, he more just ignores conflict for his friends’ (mostly atlas’) sake. idk if that makes sense LOL

35. What is the smallest, morally questionable choice they’ve made?

hmmm.. smallest? i mean scotch strings eloise along for most of the time pre timeskip. its not a main focus but its definitely important in order to understand scotch as a whole. she and scotch go out for a while, and mid way through that he realizes hes GAY gay. lol. and obviously lying to her about that is pretty questionable after a while. especially since he and atlas have been 👉👌 like the whole time. but she kind of knows. well

something a little bigger would be him encouraging or otherwise turning a blind eye to all the weird stuff atlas is up to. he doesn't know what it's like to be a werewolf, he can't say anything, right? lol.... murder is okay if its a talking dog doing it. scotch enabler supreme. actually when seraph is introduced, he and atlas have a 'joke' (kind of starts being real) about luring seraph somewhere to kill them. obviously doesnt happen and gets abandoned. but i think its important to know about their dynamic LOL

51. What’s a phrase they say a lot?

this guy is kind of goofy. i cant think of phrases rn but he has a specific way of speaking.. you could watch pretty much any old pop punk band interview and kind of get the idea. HAHAH

1. What’s the lie your character says most often?

atlas is a big fan of saying 'its fine' for all situations ever. family in mortal danger? its fine. completely splitting? its fine. arthritis excruciating? its fine. hes one of those people that dont like to deal with the fawning of others unless hes feeling real special. Ends up putting people in more danger a lot of the time. i think eloise is the only fan of communication in this friend group to be honest. i should have made her the main character

he tends to make promises he cant keep as well, but thats more general..

6. What’s their favorite [insert anything] that they’ve never recommended to anyone before?

i have NO idea. i feel like atlas would be a music snob, so maybe his favorite 'super underground' bands. otherwise he'd probably never recommend raw human meat to another human (no matter how much scotch asks -__-).. (he would chicken out anyway)

55. What’s something they’re expected to enjoy based on their hobbies / profession that they actually dislike / hate?

um. so atlas hates working out. he especially hates running, you know, the thing that wolves are known for doing a lot of? unfortunately the lycanthropy came with a side effect of pretty bad arthritis, so that doesnt exactly encourage him. he DOES exercise, a lot since hes pretty much required for his ermm "side job", but he hates it 😸 besides the arthritis it’s mostly because I think it’s silly that he hates it. yay

[faerieismm]

hi um im very sick rn so my words might be bad here but could you do a grell x transfem reader who has pretty bad chronic illness? i get its fairly specific but its a time of need ty ty ty <333

hello lovely anon! i’m sorry to hear that you’re sick :( i know how hard it can be to be in constant pain while you’d like to be out there like the others around you. know that you’re not alone and its okay to share your pain<3 my dm’s are always open! i decided i’d make some headcanons, along with a little drabble so you’ve got both types of stuff! i hope this helps to lift your spirits, atleast for a little while <3

grell sutcliff with an transfem!s/o who is chronically ill

tw? mentions of illness

genre? reverse comfort, little angsty at times?

type of writ1ng? headcanons + drabble !!

it was nice for grell, having someone who faced the same struggles as her, trans wise. well, atleast it was nice to be able to share her pain once in a while.

finally there was someone she could relate to, or go to in times where she didn’t know what to do, times others were mean to her.

you were great comfort!

and she tried to be there for you too.

as you got closer, she noticed something was a bit different about you.

grell had heard from other reapers your attendance was a little lower, often being noted as sick in the register.

and, indeed, at the days she’d walk past your room, everything would still be dark, curtains seemingly closed. could you still be asleep?

it began to worry her, but when she had asked you would always shake it off.

“don’t worry about it!”

“it’s nothing special!”

she didn’t believe you, but who was she to pry?

grell made a deal with herself though, if she noticed your absence got worse, she’d demand you tell her what’s up.

low and behold, it got worse.

so one day, when you were absent, she decided to knock on your door.

“honey, i know you’re in there, i’m worried, please open the door.”

grell then heard a little “i can’t.” followed by a louder “it’s open though.”

there you were, laying in bed, all worn out.

she rushed over to your side, asking what’s wrong.

when you finally told her, she made a pledge to always care for you.

she gets that it’s frustrating not being able to do it all on your own though, so she always asks what and what not would be nice to help with.

she doesn’t care about her reaper attendance, she was never really that strict with it, and she’d rather care for you.

at some point you got romantically involved, and the feeling to care for you, to help you, got even stronger.

i think once you’re important to grell, she’s a very caring person, and she likes to care, too!!

she often joins you in bed, or wherever you like to rest really, and talks to you for however long you need.

and if you feel guilty about it, she will think of atleast 100000 reasons not to be!!!

“my baby, so strong and beautiful.” she coos as she caresses your hair.

as all the reapers were off to their jobs, silence began to settle itself over the building.

sometimes it was one of the hardest times, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

but grell always seemed to pop in at the right moment, her pretty, smiling face appearing from behind the doorpost.

“morning darling~” you wondered how she could be so cheery at times.

the first thing she always did was planting a big fat smooch right on your forehead, leaving a lipstick mark right where everyone could see.

“have you taken your meds yet?” you nod.

grell lets out a hum of approval, and fills the kettle for some tea.

she then plops herself next to you on the bed.

“pain on a scale from one to ten?” she turns to you, awaiting your response.

going over all the places of pain, you think about it.

“mmh, nine?” you respond, a little unsure.

she lets out a ‘tsk’.

“how can you say that so calmly my dear?” she pulls the blanket further over your body, pressing another kiss to your forehead, and stands up to get you a cup of tea.

somehow, she pulls out a whole breakfast in about 3 minutes, and returns to your bed.

“i’ve made pancakes.” she grins.

you smile back at her, sometimes its nice when the people around you stay positive.

you gladly cut a piece of pancake and stuff it in your mouth. nodding in approval, you stuff another piece into your mouth.

grell laughs. “well i’m glad you like it~”

after chatting and eating some of the things she made, grell puts away the dishes and get into bed with you.

snuggling into you, she gently guides your head to her chest. as you let out a whine, she softly coos that “i’m sorry for your pain, i’m here okay?” as she gently caresses your head.

“this is not your fault, i think you’re an amazing being.” she presses another kiss to your head.

“we’re going to make the best out of this, okay?”

“okay.” it’s a soft whisper, but a promise nonetheless.

a promise that, no matter what, grell will always be here, and no matter what, you two will make the best of it.

thank you for reading anon, i hope there will be better times for you<3

love,

[indigostreaking]

could you do a headcannon of the boys taking care of you while sick? i’m super sick with the flu rn and just want affecting lol 🤍

Absolutely 🤭 I tried to vary the illnesses just for the sake of not being repetitive, but I genuinely think they’d all be very sweet and attentive.

Warnings: mentions of chronic illness, throwing up, and a whole lot of sweetness

Josh:

“You okay babe?” He asked as he walked in to your darkened bedroom. He had always been a morning person, rising with the sun. You usually slept in until mid morning, but you were woken by a cough. It was deep in your chest and rattled when you exhaled. You couldn’t breathe through your nose, so you let your mouth hang open as you shook your head. Josh walked closer, sitting down beside you and kissing your forehead gently as he held your face in his hands. “You feel pretty warm..would you like some tea?” He asked with an easy smile. You nodded this time, still far too early for words. He padded down the hall, returning moments later with a steaming mug. “I added some honey..good for the throat,” he sat down once more and held out the mug. You accepted it graciously, taking a delicate sip before placing it on your nightstand and snuggling into his lap. “Will you sing me a song?” You asked quietly and he smiled down at you, running his fingers through your hair while gently untangling the knots from sleep. He looked up and to the right as he searched his memory for the song he wanted, then back down to you as he began to sing Into The Mystic.

Jake:

“Soup’s done…want me to bring it to you, or do you want to venture out to the living room?” He asked as he leaned into your shared bedroom, hanging sideways on the door frame. You loved having him home and seeing him all domestic compared to his ‘usual’ rockstar vibe. He was wearing red flannel pajama bottoms that his mom got him for Christmas—she got a set for everyone so you could all match. His hair was pulled back in a low bun, which he did frequently when he cooked. “I can manage for soup, I guess,” you teased, not losing the sass even after sweating out a fever all morning. You wrapped the blanket around you and waddled after him, plopping yourself down on the couch while he brought over a bowl for each of you. “You’re gonna get sick if you stay this close to me,” you reprimanded between sniffles when he sat down close enough that your thighs were touching. “Don’t care,” he grinned before leaning in to kiss your forehead.

Danny:

“Y/n, you okay?” Danny asked gently after knocking on the bathroom door. You groaned in response before throwing up again. The door clicked open, and he padded in across the tile, frowning when he saw you sitting in the floor, draped over the toilet, in the middle of puking your guts up. You’d be embarrassed if you had the energy, but you couldn’t find it in you. You looked up at him helplessly, and he sat down behind you without a word, removing the hair tie from his wrist to pull back your hair and rubbing your back soothingly. “You’re shaking…Do you think I can put you in bed?” He sounded nervous as he asked, but you nodded. You felt okay enough for the moment, so he scooped you up bridal style and carried you to bed, placing you gently and tucking you in. He trotted out of the room, returning with a trash can, some crackers, and a glass of ginger ale with a straw. He sat everything down and handed you the remote before settling in beside you. You took it and switched it to YouTube, turning on your comfort song without shame. Danny giggled and shook his head when Light My Love came on, but you could have sworn you heard him singing along before you fell asleep.

Sammy:

“Baby, it’s fine, I promise. Go take a bath and crawl back in bed. I’ll join you in a few,” Sam said sweetly after you told him you didn’t really feel up to the plans you had today. You were dealing with a flare up, and just felt exhausted and sore. He was an angel for being so understanding, and you made a mental note to make it up to him when you felt better. You turned on the faucet, letting the tub fill with warm water as you undressed. When you shut the water back off, you could hear Sam talking to someone on the phone. “Yeah, sorry but we’re not going to make it today. Y/n isn’t feeling well,” he said calmly, and you hated that he felt the need to be the one to let everyone know..but you loved him for it. “Well yeah, that’s what chronic means,” he was definitely annoyed now, bordering on angry, and you desperately wished you could hear the other person. “I don’t care if she ‘looks sick’. You don’t look like an idiot, but that didn’t stop you….yeah fuck you, too!” You heard his phone slam into the couch cushion and he sighed. You settled into the tub, knowing he’d come to you when he was ready, and like clockwork he appeared. “Who was that?” You asked softly. “No one important,” he replied plainly. “Room for one more?” He asked with a sly smirk.

[mj-thrush-gxn]

asking this to my fav dndads artists, do you ship any of the teens, if so whom with?

Sorry i took a little while to think about this

hmmmm

this is actually a really hard question because i haven’t really thought about it-

okay i’m gonna go teen by teen 🫡

Taylor— honestly, swiftli. I feel like link is the one taylor gets along best with, so it’s kinda hard for me to see taylor with anyone but link.— BUT ALSO the idea of gothweeb is adorable and i find it kinda funny. they kinda bully each other but it’s fun because i love them. gothweeb is probably my #2 taylor ship. —i feel like taylor and hero was funny but it would’ve never worked out, and it didn’t, and i thought it was really funny. so like, i didn’t really ship it, but i thought they were hilarious.

Link— this is when i reveal my biggest secret… i love gothcleats. i like gothcleats a lot more than i like swiftli. gothcleat moments are more serious and carry more meaning, swiftli if mainly just funny homoeroticism and i love it. i honestly don’t know how to explain why i like gothcleats so much i just do. they hold a special place in my heart. —swiftli is my second favorite. LIKE AHHHHHHHH!!! PIZZA, PISS, HOMOEROTICISM!!!! ALL THE BEST THINGS!!! once again, their relationship is mostly just them being dorky little dweebs and i love them for it. — I LOVE KICKWORTHY… but that’s mostly because it’s basically just me and my best friend and i thought it was funny. i love the joker, my best friend loves garfield, instant win.but in all seriousness, i don’t really have a big opinion on them. i feel like since link didn’t like him at all until after apollo four teens, they dont have a wholesome enough relationship. i know that link has warmed up to herm a lot since then and i find them cute, its just that. — oakicks- i love oakicks and i think that if they polished up their friendship that would be wonderful. norm tries so hard to make everything good for everyone, especially link and herm, but it never works for him. so like, if link had tried a little harder to be nice and include him earlier in the season, it coulda worked.

Norm— ah norm… poor sweet norm… ANYWAY!! Oakworthy. i love oakworthy. it’s so dimmed but i also think it’s so cool and i just think it should be 100% canon. i mean, normal has been manifesting it since the dance, so like, cmon. I feel like herm doesn’t actually like scary as much as he says he does. like it’s just part of the bit. if herm breaks character, the first thing he better do is give norm a smooch. that’s all im saying. i will choose to believe that hermie actually likes normal and is just playing a part rn. he has to crack. he just has to. Norm deserves to get what he wants for just once, and this is all he wants. please anthony, let will have his moment. — Coin Toss, do they actually have a ship name? cause if not i just came up with one. Anyway- scary and norm. i love them. they are so same narrative opposite direction and i love them for it. i see them as platonic but like, feel free to give the homies a kiss ig. but yeah i mostly see them as platonic and scary needs to accept that norm is her new best friend. deal. — i already laid out my reasons why oakicks doesn’t work. i love them but like 😔. —oakweeb just does not work. it never will. taylor bullies norm way too much.

Scary — uhhh- Gothcleats, Gothkicks, wtv. i already laid out my reasons in links section. but like, link and scary could help each other out so much. both of their lives would be (i don’t wanna say so much, but) better. anyway- scary just needs to accept that she can be loved. — gothweeb, i already laid out my thoughts in taylor’s section. i like that and i think they would be cute, but like, not established enough. so i see them as platonic. — already stated my case for coin toss, platonic and i love them. I will explain the whole scary and hermie thing in the herm section- cause i need to write down stuff for herm… — scerica. yes. i love them. let the girls be girls. i ship it, like extremely, but also- they only interacted once in canon. they are my teen, female, nark basically. yes.

Herm- THE SCENE PARTNERS- SCARY AND HERM ARE JUST SCENE PARTNERS TO HERM- I FEEL LIKE HERMIE AND SCARY ARE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS AND THEY SHOULD HAVE GIRLSNIGHT WITH MARGARITA AND ERICA- HERM REFERRED TO SCARY AS A SCENE PARTNER THATS ALL IM SAYING — oakworthy. yes. if hermie can get over himself and accept that scary is nothing but a friend and a scene partner, it would work. please. i am begging. — already stated my place on kickworthy — swiftworthy is illegal.

your welcome-

i rambled- a lot.

[bugflies00]

ok its time for my. traditional post-stream moment (well. post-vod considering the circumstances) where i try to condense all my thoughts into a singular post especially rn since i didn’t liveblog so people not watching don’t have to see it

dsmp spoilers obviously 

um. okay uh well first off im still crying, that should give you…? an idea of the effect this stream had on me…?

im still holding onto hope for this story to be about healing but if it ends grim and the only hope is ‘oooh volume II blank slate woo’ i don’t know what i’ll do with myself LOL (despair). but i’d like to think if wilbur didn’t kill off his character. i’d like to think tommy wouldn’t either. but like always in extremely tense dangerous points in the story before i’ve never believed they would die like i never thought cwilbur would die yknow. but i think. well this is the most scared ive been for lore since um well ever actually i think

first off. gonna try to avoid talking about dream as much as possible even his character.  just hope people aren’t gonna take the justifications he and cpunz give for the . Horribly Fucked Up shit theyre doing as valid and start running with ‘oooh cdream was in the right and the victim all along!!’ but who am i kidding they probably have already. ill admit i didn’t see the hydra-type plan coming, with one not being killable if the other’s alive so that was a twist

UMM lord that whole lava room scene was . indescribable levels of fucked up and dont get me started on how cdream managed to convince ctommy that all the shit and abuse he’s suffered (even up to doomsday) was HIS FAULT and we see that resurface not even an hour later when ctommy tells ctubbo every bad situation theyve had since the start of the server has been his fault. don’t get me started

when they broke character because tommy couldnt do the stunt of aiming the throw of the discs JDJZDJJDSJ appreciated the break of the tension it made everything worse after in comparison. even tommy said he was on the ‘verge of tears irl before that’

and then the nuke. we got SO SO CLOSE to an acknowledgment of the nuke plan. of c!rocketduo’s plan to kill ctommy. but honestly while we didn’t get it outwardly i’ll take ctommy hesitance and like. pause after ctubbo said cjack helped him & ctommy brought up the explosion near him as him putting together the pieces. ill pretend just for my own sake. SPEAKING OF ctommy now knows cranboo was the one who set up the explosions (under mind control obviously) that stuck him in the prison with cdream and got him killed!!! can this boy catch a break. well he’s dying tomorrow so i guess he’s getting a very long break (<- just cried for an hour at that prospect)

and then. ctommy setting up the plan to trade his life for everyone else’s.

okay so like we all saw it coming but Ummmmmmmm well still a punch to the gut. Ummmmmmm. Ummmmm dealing well with this info. also ctommy screaming at ctubbo to ‘stop being optimistic’ and ‘its over, theyve lost’ and how he needs to just do this and die and its the end. Hahahahhahaha disc war finale roles flipped amirite. now ctubbos desperately clinging onto an alternate solution and ctommys the one who’s so jaded, so desperate that he’s convinced he needs to die (and that he deserves to. let’s be real ctommy thinks he deserves to die because he believes he’s at fault for the shit he and the others have been through. and if he dies without anyone having fucking proved him wrong. well.)

and like in my mind this story has always been about healing, like i said. and i’d genuinely be surprised if tommy chose an absolutely grim ending for his character (dying for everyone, sure a hero’s death, but dying still thinking he’s at fault for it all. that’s not just tragic that’s unnecessary.) but yknow at this point

the part that got me the worst was the whole bit after they started walking away from the nuke site. like they started walking towards and on the prime path and talking about how it was the last time and Uhm wellllllllll yes so maybe i cried fuck off . like the LAST TIME do you realise this???? LAST TIME c!clingyduo walked the prime path. and when ctommy started talking about lmanberg. looking at the flag. ASKING CTUBBO THAT, AFTER HIS DEATH, THE FLAG BE PUT UP THERE TO FLY IN THE WIND. ASKING CTUBBO TO TELL EVERYONE, INCLUDING HIS SON AND HIS SON’S CHILDREN, THE STORIES OF THEM AND THE OTHERS AND LMANBERG. looking at the lmanberg pictures. sitting on the bench together but there’s no music anymore because the discs are gone but that’s alright, it’s so pretty, look at the sunset tommy isn’t it so pretty? yeah it is. i’m gonna die tomorrow tubbo

like its all always been about lmanberg because it was about them. and i know people are gonna run with cpunz’s ‘nations exclude those not part of it’ argument, but lmanberg was about the community. like ill never say this enough lmanberg was literally family like that’s what they were all fighting for or clinging onto or running away from . and it was their project and to cwilbur it was ctommy and they were all important but ctommy was the heart of it all. he gave everything for it, for them really. over and over and now he wants ctubbo to tell those stories after he’s gone because he plans to walk in tomorrow at eighteen years old in a place where he’s only known trauma and death, walk in there and lure his abuser and his partner and then take a nuke for everyone. youngest one on that server. and yeah they’re not kids anymore (according to them) but they are they’re fucking kids ctommy is so tragic i feel fucking ill

and now its past midnight meaning Today is. final ctommy stream ever. Um well it has not sinked in yet. two years and probably my favourite character of all time ending Today and most likely dying. brother i don’t know what i’ll do with myself if he dies im genuinely so embarrassingly attached to this character and the others and this story. and so much of it feels so hollow when they walk around the server and there’s no one. idk whatever happens tomorrow i’ll still be so fucking glad for this story no matter how fucked up some things have been recently and no matter how much wasted potential there was. this is disgustingly sappy but tbh you clicked ‘read more’ on this post like u signed up for this. anyway ctommy my shining star whatever happens tomorrow youve been the best ever🌟🌟🌟 my favourite little guy in the whole wide world literally a star

[that-pissed-off-tolkien-blogger]

Okay so here’s the work update

So, I believe I posted that I got my appendix out earlier this year. That was a whole fiasco with me being in the hospital twice and missing a bit over a week of work. When I came back from work, no one had told me I needed to get doctor clearance to be back even though the person I would have sent it to WATCHED ME LEAVE WORK AT LUNCH FOR EMERGENCY SURGERY! This bitch would continue to be a fucking problem. Anyway, so work made me use all of my leave even though I was like “no don’t pay me I need my leave for something else.”

Fast forward to me putting in my leave for that something else, my study abroad in Scotland. It was roughly a two week study abroad, but I said fuck it I’m gonna stay in London a few extra days after, I deserve it - not that I told work that. I put my leave in and turns out someone is already off at the same time. In my request I put “for mandatory study abroad class”, implying I didn’t have a choice and this leave was happening no matter what. I get an email from that same dumb cunt as before saying “we can’t let you take this, someone is already out then and it’s too long.” I email back with “as per my initial time off request, this is for a mandatory study abroad for a Master’s Program and I have no control over the duration or the time” - corporate speak for “can you fucking read?” So a huff and a fuss later and they allow it because it’s a school thing, but in the meeting about it I am told to my face, in slightly round about words, that if I am off for anything other than illness or something unexpected like a death in the family, I will be fired.

Now, this would not be a problem except for the fact that prior to even being hired at this place my dad had booked and paid for most of the family to go on a cruise - literally everything was paid for including airfare and excursions and it came to around $40k which is basically my entire fucking salary after taxes. So, no way was I going to miss that - ironically I ended up sick and missing half the cruise anyway but that’s a story for later.

Anyway, now I basically have a death sentence over my head. But I keep chugging along with the plan to quit while I’m in Scotland. That’s when work starts getting worse. I was taking three classes at the time, which for a Master’s Program is pretty much full time. I am also working full time and I’m doing catch up work for school after being hospitalized and incapacitated for the second half of the first week of school and the first half of the second week, so two weeks for all intents and purposes. I���m also healing from surgery so I should be resting. Nope, I’m constantly running on 2-4hrs of sleep, which is not healthy normally and an absolutely terrible idea if you’re supposed to be healing.

I’d been doing a bit of homework at work at this time, but mostly saving it for lunch and then the odd small thing during large gaps between patients. Because of the lack of time and pressure I started working on homework all the time between patients. Note, another one of my coworkers was also in school for some kind of a nursing license (LPN, RN idk). So what happens, you ask? Well, I start getting scolded by the head nurse for doing homework. MEANWHILE she and the other nurse were FUCKING HELPING THE OTHER GIRL WITH HER CLASSWORK IN FRONT OF PATIENTS. Double standard much? I didn’t give a fuck so I kept doing homework but the “you better not be doing homework back there” and “are you doing homework” got old real fucking fast.

The end of my semester was in sight so I was under the gun in school and dealing with going in every day to a work environment where I was being treated poorly by the people I worked closest with - FYI the docs? Yeah they were all onboard with me doing homework at work and would say things like “you have to get it done whenever you can”. So finally, I said fuck it. There’s no way I can finish all of what I need to read and do before the end of the semester and go to work if at work during my fucking downtime I can’t do homework - and by downtime I do mean I had done everything in the office I could including restocking and cleaning like I made fucking sure that everything work related that could get done was done. And then one morning I got dressed for work, drove to my mother’s and then quit via email, shut my phone off, and went to sleep on her sofa.

Anyway that’s if. If anyone has questions or needs elaboration on something lmk. Anon is always on.

[moriartyluver]

Sherlock definitely doesn’t know anything about love, bro is clueless

STOP WILLIAM PROBABLY FELT EVEN MORE GUILTY BECAUSE FL NEVER GOT ANY REASSURANCE OF HIM LOVING HER AND CARING ABOUT THEIR CHILD

Imagine Louis taking liam to his grave because bro was curious or smth and he somehow found the letters😭

Love louis, but bro has to leave liam to his whoreship of fl

It’s okay fl and liam eventually got better when he came back

Louis played the therapist

They so should have fucked in his office in that scene💔 it’s okay tho they probably fucked in every room of that manor after they did it the first time

FL’S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH BRO GIVE THE POOR GIRL A BREAK😭

Also liam may be a stupid virgin but he’s still good asf, bro literally said it himself🛐

FL AND WILLIAM WOULD NEVER PLAY CBAT WHILE FUCKING

okay maybe William’s dumbass would but fl would beat him for it🛐

You just re-traumatized me with that

The images in my head rn are terrifying

Oh god

You just convinced me to go church

🎀.

John getting engaged and Sherlocks silly reaction is proof enough that sherly knows NOTHING about love. He may have only seen it once and acknowledged it when fl came to him to tell him to help liam and he just says “you really love him, don’t you?” And she just nods with a melancholic smile

The moment liam finds out about the accidental fetus deletus, poor guy is just sobbing and shi because he feels like it was his fault and poor fl was suffering mourning not one but TWO people

If Liam found the letters he wouldn’t know how to feel. He’d feel guilty but also bro was probably kicking his feet and blushing because he hadn’t ever been written a love letter from fl

Each time fl goes, she leaves a bouquet of lillies and Liam saw the fresh bouquet when he visits his grave

Keyword: eventually

It was probably so awkward for them at first. Fl was probably a little salty and Liam is just trying not to annoy her

Imagine them at that family dinner omg 😭 like with john and mycroft and miss Hudson and they’re all like ‘whys she so mad at him I thought they were married’

Louis definitely had to deal with their silly couple shenanigans for a bit afterwards.

Also poor Louis had to deal with his older brother being so down bad for god knows how long. William probably has a whole shrine for his whoreship of fl

On that note, bro is probably such a good therapist. They should have given him more screen time away from liam before his brother ‘died’ because his development seemed a bit sudden but makes sense when you read back on it

Nah they down bad fr 😭 can’t keep their hands off of each other omg

EVERY ROOM 😟😟 I think maybe the office and both their rooms are enough. Bathroom too if they’re that down bad there are other people in the house

Maybe if u combine both the rooms in Durham and London, that could probably make sense

Nah they actually can’t stop being down horrendously. There are going to be complaints from the other residents I swear

He may be good without realising but that stupid virgin still needs to initiate something ‼️ those idiots need to consummate the marriage

Also I actually think it makes most sense for William (along with the other Moriarty bros tbh and other characters like the Holmes brothers) to have little to no experience even in canon. You can’t tell me liam had time for anything involving his clothes off in the manga and in false lovers, bro couldn’t do that unless with fl. stupid hoe 🙄

Nah fl is so silly she probably made it a competition mid way just so she wouldn’t have the admit that she thinks liam is hot.

I had to be a little silly with the cbat thing cmon 😭 liam wouldn’t even mind being beat for that what a masochist

Yknow who else needs to go to church?

William

He should get on his knees for something that isn’t fl (that has so many meanings to it—)

[clacing]

The way I was counting down the days when u finished the book shsjsksk when that email notification came I was 🏃‍♀️ like im sorry I was excited but no ur so right.

[Light Spoilers(?)]

The book is totally incomprehensible especially when you get to the part where they're driving the bus, the way the narration switches up is hard to keep up with. Especially given how we are going from Nona's POV to about three of Nona's POV and then we snap back and just don't question that part like???

But I don’t have much to say rn because you're still processing the book and like talking about how Nona is a soup of about three and a half souls and the implication of a Percect Lyctor and the whole of John's chapters, it's all just mush until you kind of crawl through each point.

If you want like a super boiled down explanation of the book; imo it's a book meant to juxtapose Nona and who her original body is. The John chapters go into a fair amount of detail on how the series has gotten to this point(in as much as we can trust John about anything)

But like I'm so very interested in Anastasia and her connection with the 9th house and the relationship she seems to have had with The Body, given what we hear her say about Anastasia during that chapter.

Which like also goes into how Harrow is compared to Anastasia by Mercy(a less attractive Anastasia) and why Harrow and the 9th house specifically has such a nuanced relationship with the Body and the Locked Tomb.

I'm jumping around walls, I'm literally so in love with this book rn I just want to blab about it 😭

DAMN that was quick lmao No you're right the truck part is absolutely when I went from "I don't understand anything that's happening, but that's okay, I will eventually" to "Not only did I not understand anything that happened this far but it's probably only going to get worse" like I was so confused about the dynamics within BoE and the conflict Antioch had with God and the blue madness.... literally what

Having Nona as a narrator was interesting but also exhausting 'cause she also doesn't understand anything in a very different way than Gideon didn't understand anything in GTN or Harrow in HTN. 'Cause she literally doesn't know anything about anything. When they get to the Ninth she talks about stepping in a cage with bars and the floors flying up around them and I nearly had an aneurysm just trying to figure out that she was describing an elevator. And the whole book is like that 😭 I appreciate Muir's dedication to "Show, don't tell" but sometimes.... telling is just fine.....

The alternating chapters were a masterpiece though like how every piece of the story John told brought you one step closer to understanding who Nona was and sometimes paralleling her side of the story. I was so into it I could not stop reading for 7 whole hours on the train

(Also help who are the three and a half souls you're talking about.... I thought it was "just" Earth but I've since been informed that Harrow has consumed part of Gideon's soul so that's the half.... who are the other two.... Harrow and Anastasia?)

And about Harrow and The Body.... I'm so curious what the whole deal is. I don't know if I missed something but like. Alecto's soul was inside her all along somehow, right? And also. ALSO. is Harrow's love for The Body just the result of part of her soul longing for its original body. And that's why once Alecto is back in her body and she kisses Harrow Harrow isn't pleased about it. I literally realized this right now as I was typing 'cause while reading I was so convinced THIS line:

was foreshadowing that "Harrow was Alecto all along and that's why she loves The Body so much" but actually that works even if Alecto is only part of her soul. And the fact that the spirit of the literal Earth (or at least the part of it that John couldn't consume) was just chilling inside her... no wonder Harrow was so powerful and also very mentally unstable