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yelena-bellova · 4 years

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Don’t Be Afraid: Poe Dameron x Solo!Reader - Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve: Where We Go From Here

Series Masterlist

Plot: Y/n, Rey, Finn and Chewie return to D’Qar and the Resistance determines their next course of action.

Warnings: angst, maybe one curse word, more angst

Word Count: 7.2k

A/N: This is a messy chapter but there were so many ends to tie before moving onto TLJ. Grief is also such a weird thing to write about because everyone handles it differently. Hope you like it and as always, excuse the typos.

——————

At some point during the flight home, after crying enough to dehydrate myself, I went numb. My tears stopped, my yelling ceased and I simply sat in the co-pilot’s chair quietly working. We grieved losses all the time in the Resistance, but it was different for me this time. This was my father. There was a part of me that wanted to hop out of hyperspace and fly to some corner of the galaxy where I didn’t have to see anybody. But I remembered my mother, Poe, and all the other people that were counting on us to return. I needed to see them and hold them, I needed to know that I hadn’t lost everyone today. They outweighed my desire to run any day of the week.

Once we had landed safely, Finn was our priority. Chewie carried him off the ship while Rey and I brought up the rear. I’d used my comm to let base know we’d need medical and true to their word, they were waiting as soon as we hit the tarmac. There was a crowd that consisted of pretty much every Resistance member running towards us. The medical team took Finn from Chewie’s arms and I heard them say that they’d found a heartbeat.

“Y/n!” Poe called.

Poe was alive, I had that to cling to at least. I saw him speeding ahead of everyone else, stopping to quickly look over Finn before meeting me,

“What happened? Are you okay?” he asked hurriedly, taking me into his arms. I pressed my face into his flight suit, inhaling his scent as a reminder that he was real.

“Go with Finn, make sure he’s okay.” I replied quietly, he pulled back to ask another question, “Please, for me. I’ll explain what happened later.”

He hesitated before kissing my cheek and running to catch up with the medical team. Someone needed to be with our friend in case he woke up, though that was unlikely to happen this fast. Rey and I watched as Finn was wheeled away, we could do no more for him.

It was then that I began to process what Rey and I had just been through. We’d fought together and almost died together, but then our relationship had consisted of little else so far. We met each other’s watery eyes and pulled the other in for a hug, holding on to each other gratefully. I hoped with everything in me that she wasn’t going to go back to Jakku, that she’d stay and fight with us.

I pulled away to pick through the crowd, scanning for one person. I should’ve known she’d already be there waiting for us. My mother and I locked eyes and my heart felt like it was breaking all over again. It was clear to see she already knew about Dad, it was impossible for her not to have sensed it. I took a few slow steps towards her before running into her arms. We clung to each other tightly as we silently grieved together, there was nothing that seemed right to say. At some point we’d talk about it, but the wound was far too fresh. We were now the last remaining members of the Solo family. That alone was one reason I was glad I had survived, I couldn’t bear the thought of my mother having lost her whole family. She pulled away and took my face in her hands, pressing our foreheads together. I could feel her grief, her heartbreak, every emotion that was flowing through her. I’d made the decision flying back that I had to tell her about my powers. She deserved to know and I couldn’t live with the guilt anymore.

We broke apart and I turned her towards Rey, they had yet to meet but Mom had heard so much about her. Rey looked like a kicked Porg, helpless and scarred by what she’d seen today. I watched Mom give my friend the first motherly embrace she’d had since she was a child. Rey sunk into it easily, but she quickly pulled me by the arm to join them. The three of us stood there for a moment, taking comfort in the fact that we didn’t have to face our struggles alone. I only wished I was shedding tears the same way they were, but I couldn’t find the strength to. All my strength, emotional and physical, had been used in the forest.

——————

I’d never heard the command center so quiet, no one made a noise louder than a deep breath. Chewbacca sat in a corner, a paw to his head letting out a little moan every few minutes. He was hurting just as much as me and my mother were. A couple majors and lieutenants stood around the round table, Snap and Jess nearby as well. Mom stared aimlessly at a chart, I’d come over and put my hand on hers and she’d halfheartedly squeezed it. We needed to mourn together, but we also needed time on our own. Rey sat atop a crate, no doubt trying to wrap her head around the situation she was now in. I sat on the stone seating against one of the cold rock walls, staring at a wall. Poe had entered eventually to report that Finn was stable and the medics said he had a fighting chance. While I was beyond relieved, I couldn’t crack a smile.

Poe kneeled down in front of me, “Sweetheart, what happened out there?”

I met his loving gaze, wanting to tell him everything but knowing that if I did, I’d feel too much at once. It would all come out in a jumble of tears and words. I was opening my mouth to say that when 3PO entered,

“General? Excuse me? General? R2-D2 may contain some much needed good news.” “R2?” I called, turning my head to hear a series of beeps I hadn’t heard in twelve years. I watched the familiar droid, who’d sat collecting dust under a sheet for so long, roll to find me. I dropped to my knees at the sight of him and threw my arms around him, “Buddy, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.” I’m happy to see you too, but I’m going to need you to let go so I can show you something.

I released him so he could back up next to me and project a large hologram map in the air. Poe pulled me to my feet and we stood together examining it, the map was practically complete except for one missing piece.

“Wait a minute…” I mumbled just as BB-8 rolled in front of our group to take a look at the map before beeping ecstatically. He turned to Poe,

Give me the drive! Give me the drive! “Yeah, all right, buddy. Hold on.” Poe went to the computer we’d saved the drive in and retrieved it. He inserted it into BB-8, who rolled across from R2 and projected a hologram of the piece of the map. Everyone in the room gasped as Bee inserted his piece into the empty shape, the map was whole.

“The map! It is complete!” 3PO exclaimed, I covered my gaping mouth and immediately turned around to find my mother. She was just as awestruck as I was, I made my way to her and put a hand on her shoulder. I gave a breathy chuckle and we embraced, in the worst circumstances we had found a shred of hope. My uncle was out there and we could go find him now. After breaking from her, I turned to Poe, who was standing behind us, and practically leapt into his arms. Our mission was complete.

Less than an hour later, our group settled around the map table to decide what the next plan of action was.

“We’re going to need a team to go and locate Master Skywalker,” Admiral Statura stated.

“It doesn’t need to be a team,” my mother spoke up, “We can’t afford to spare more people than needed.” “So we send one person to go retrieve him?” Bracca inquired.

“Yes,” Mom answered, “But the right one. I’d go myself but I need to be here in case of an ambush. There’s no saying that the First Order doesn’t know where we are and with what we just did, there is chance of attack.”

“Commander Solo?”

I was zoned out, giving all my focus to the center of the table. It was the mention of my last name that caused me to finally look up, everyone was looking to me expectantly.

“Are you willing to lead the mission to go find Skywalker?” Statura asked.

I looked back down at the table, I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to say. I’d fought my mother tooth and nail over the past few years about going and finding Luke. But now that the time had come, I was less enthusiastic about the prospect. I was exhausted, beaten down and drowning in grief. But. war waited for no one and it didn’t care about your losses.

I nodded softly, “I’ll go.”

Mom looked over, her lips pressed in a thin line and her eyes misty, “Y/n…” “No,” I objected, “Someone needs to and I’m the one that begged to go in the first place. It should be me,” I bit down hard on my lip, every part of me screaming to stay put, “I’ll be fine.” “General,” Rey said, “I’ll go.”

“Rey,” I began, watching her expression change from solemn to confidant in a matter of seconds. “Y/n, you’ve been through too much today to turn around and leave again. I want to do this, for you and for the Resistance.” I ran a hand through my hair and addressed the group, “I trust her, Rey was a scavenger on Jakku. She’s a fighter too, a damn good one.”

“Rey, are you sure you’re up to this?” Mom asked.

“More than sure,” Rey nodded, “I want to do my part.”

The most joy I could summon came out as a quirk of the corner of my lips. I was overwhelmingly grateful for my friend’s gesture though, and I would make sure to communicate that.

“Then it’s decided,” Mom announced, “Rey will take the Falcon, Chewbacca and R2 to locate Master Skywalker. The rest of us will remain here and keep watch for an attack. Meeting dismissed.”

Rey was almost immediately whisked away to get a change of clothes and a room assignment. I’d have to talk to her later. Meanwhile, I’d fill my quota of usefulness for the day and was craving the safety of my quarters.

“I’m going to head to my room,” I whispered to Mom, “I’m assuming you’re going to stay here for now?” She took a deep breath, “I have to, someone needs to be steering the ship.”

I nodded somberly, my mother was the strongest person I’d ever known. Even while mourning the love of her life, she was still carrying out her duties. I attempted to do it but Mom succeeded at it, there was no second thought in her mind as to what needed to be done.

“Darling,” she said as I’d begun to move away, taking my hand into hers, “Say the word and I’ll come running.”

Unable to think of the right thing to say, I simply squeezed her hand and hurried out of the command center. The walk to my room was uneventful, most people were still outside or in the mess hall celebrating our victory. Victory? Was it a victory? I suppose to most, it was the biggest victory the Resistance had seen in a long time. Meanwhile I’d just suffered my greatest loss and couldn’t find joy in anything. Yet since returning, three things that should have made me happy had happened. R2 had woken up, we’d located Uncle Luke, and Finn was most likely going to live. But my father was still dead, that was the overshadowing event of the day.

I halfheartedly punched in the code to my room and dragged myself in. Shutting my door, the first thing I did was take off my jacket and unclip the lightsaber that I’d reattached in the Falcon. I tucked it away in a desk drawer, this time out of care and not shame. Dropping the jacket on my chair, I then sank onto the edge of my bed and buried my face in my hands. I felt like I’d aged decades over the past few hours. I shut my eyes and rubbed them, but as soon as I did, I saw everything.

The red blade sliding through Dad’s back.

“No…”

His lifeless body falling down the shaft.

“No…” Kylo’s face as he attacked me.

“No…”

“You’re a worthless orphan who your brother should have left to die.”

“NO!”

I snapped.

I sprang from the bed and began using the Force to extract drawers from my dresser in a frenzy. Tears fell freely once again, streaming down my cheeks like the saddest river. I yelled as I extended my hand to the dresser itself, slamming it to the ground. Next was my desk, I tipped it over but the drawer containing my saber stayed untouched. I let out a loud cry as I raised my hand to my bed, lifting the mattress in the air and making it fly across the room. Once I’d redecorated the room, I was left with the overwhelming emotions swirling inside me. I dropped to my knees and sobbed violently as I replayed my father’s death and my fight with Kylo. I hadn’t heard the sound of the keypad beeping or the door opening and closing over my cries.

“Y/n!” Poe exclaimed, his arms wrapped around me and held me tightly. I blindly felt around for his hands, which quickly grasped mine and squeezed. He made no effort to stop me from crying, he knew that if I was having this strong of a reaction it was justified. But his warm touch and soothing voice, repeatedly speaking my name, quelled my manic state. He opened his legs and adjusted me between them, my back falling against his firm chest. I leaned my head against his, occasionally he’d dip down and press a tender kiss to my shoulder. My tears continued to fall, though switching to a softer steady stream eventually. The room was near silent as he gently rocked us back and forth, the only sound filling the air was my sniffling.

“He’s dead,” I whispered, “My dad’s dead.” Poe let out a heavy sigh, “I thought he might be, I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” “I watched him die, Poe,” I trembled, “I watched Kylo Ren kill him.”

Poe stopped rocking and turned his head to look at me, “What?” I nodded, more tears escaping my eyes.

“Oh, Y/n…” Poe said lowly, “I can’t believe you had to see that.”

“I had to fight him too.” “You fought him?” “I didn’t have much of a choice.” He dropped his forehead to my shoulder, shuddering as he probably conjured up a visual of me battling Ren. I squeezed his hand reassuringly,

“I’m here, you didn’t lose me.” “I know,” he insisted, “I just wish you wouldn’t have had to go through all that.”

I sniffled, “Yeah, me too.”

Poe kissed my temple and between the tenderness of the moment and the memories surfacing, I began crying again.

“What can I do for you?” Poe whispered against my hair.

“Just stay with me. Please…” I whimpered before dissolving into another fit of sobs. Poe dropped his head back down to my shoulder and tightened his grip. We rode out the wave of sorrow together and once I’d quieted down, he told me to “stay there for a second” and stood up. I turned and watched him lug my mattress back up into it’s frame. Once it was secure, he came back and lifted me into his arms, carrying me over and laying me down gently. He climbed over to the other side and pulled me into his warm embrace, which I melted into. I settled underneath his chin and wept into his flight suit, Poe’s hand rubbing my back slowly.

“Thank you,” I whispered. “For what?”

“For coming back to me.”

Poe kissed the top of my head, “Always, sweetheart. Always.” —————

When I woke up, I was still cradled in Poe’s arms. We’d flipped in our sleep and his chest was now pressed to my back, our legs tangled together. He was lightly snoring, getting well deserved rest after what we’d been through. However I’d caught a whiff of myself and practically gagged. I was just as sad as I’d been last night, but I could mourn and be clean at the same time. Poe’s grip was tight but I was able to wriggle out, thank goodness he was a heavy sleeper. I navigated my way around the drawers I’d abused and grabbed a change of clothes. I tiptoed into the refresher and shut the door quietly, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I looked like a person who’d been dragged through a desert, the snow, a couple fights complete with a wicked case of bedhead. So…not great. I peeled off my clothing, kicked off my boots, and got into the shower. I’d been so spent last night I’d even slept in my shoes. Poe hadn’t changed from his flight suit either so clearly he’d been just as tired.

Alone with no distractions, I thought of Dad again. Though instead of thinking about his last few seconds, I thought of our last interactions. In our last day spent together, we’d had two of our best conversations (we were Solos of course, communication wasn’t our forte) piloted the Falcon together, fought together and the best of them all…I’d reunited him with Mom and enjoyed a few short minutes of having my family together again. I smiled for the first time since yesterday at the memory of being squished between my parents, telling them I loved them. Love. Dad’s last words to me had been telling me how much he loved me, how he wanted to keep me safe. The man was a scoundrel, but damn it if he didn’t fiercely protect his loved ones. I’d known people in the Resistance who’d lost loved ones. Their last interaction with them had been a fight or they’d missed the chance to say ‘I love you’ one last time. I was lucky enough to have had a last day with my father that I would cherish for the rest of my life. Dangerous and crazy as it had been...That was perhaps the only comfort I could take regarding his death.

I changed into a pair of cargo pants and a plain black tank top, understandably forgoing my commanders uniform. I towel dried my hair, brushed my teeth and felt a little better about facing the day. However, I could no longer ignore my stomach growling. The adrenaline that had sustained me since Jakku had long worn off and I realized just how dehydrated and starved I was. I quietly opened the door to reveal a sleepy Poe sitting on the edge of my bed rubbing his eyes. As soon as he registered my presence, he was up and crossing the room to me.

“Hey” he greeted, his voice gravelly, “I was wondering where you went.”

“Couldn’t stand my smell any longer,” I explained with a quiet laugh, intertwining our hands.

“If it helps, I didn’t notice any smell,” he said, smiling down at me.

Silence fell over the room as our eyes met, his deep brown ones carrying the same worry and sadness for me as last night. Poe had many lovable qualities, but the one I admired the most was how deeply he loved the people close to his heart. He cared so profoundly for me it almost broke my heart in the best way. I gently pulled him down to place my lips on his in a sweet morning kiss. Poe’s lips moved against mine carefully, as if he was afraid I’d break with too much pressure. I almost appreciated it, a heated make-out session didn’t feel appropriate with the somber cloud hanging over the room. My thumbs rubbed against the sides of his neck as we broke apart, he pressed a final kiss to my forehead and encircled my hips.

“How are you doing?” he asked cautiously.

I sighed, “I don’t know. I’m still…shattered, but I’m also grateful for the last day I spent with him. I’m definitely not done crying about it but I also have work to do…” “Y/n,” Poe began, his hands sliding up my back, “You can take time off, you deserve it.” “No, no, not Resistance work. Personal stuff.” He raised a concerned eyebrow, “Should I be worried?” I chuckled, “You hitched your cart to a Solo, you should always be worried.”

Poe chortled, “I don’t think truer words have ever been spoken.”

A knock at the door surprised both of us, I padded over and opened it to reveal 3PO. He was carrying a tray with a large plate of food and glass of water,

“Good morning, Mistress Solo. Your mother requested that I bring you breakfast.” “Thanks, 3PO,” I took the tray from his hands, “I appreciate it.” “You are most welcome,” he began to leave but came back, ”Oh, and she has requested a meeting with you in her chamber before Rey and Chewbacca depart.

“Okay, tell her I’ll meet her in a half hour.”

——————

After downing the food and drink 3PO had brought and convincing Poe I was well enough that he could go shower and eat breakfast, I knocked on my mother’s door.

When she opened, she was dressed in a stunning blue dress with her grey hair styled beautifully atop her head. But the redness in her puffy eyes, identical to mine, suggested she hadn’t had a pleasant night or morning. I took her hand immediately as she ushered me in, as soon as the door was shut we embraced. What was it about your mother’s holding you that immediately brought every emotion you were trying to hide to the surface? Quietly, I cried into her shoulder but unlike yesterday, I knew that today we needed to talk. I dried my eyes and walked to her bed, sitting down and resting my arms between my legs. Mom sat down next to me and gracefully folded her hands in her lap,

“I just have one question for the time being.” “Hmm?” “Did you have to watch?” My eyes watered again as I played the long lasting seconds back in my mind, the blade had pierced him so easily. He was defenseless. And of course she’d known who killed him, she’d felt a double dose of pain when it happened. I nodded sadly and buried my face in my hands, elbows balanced on my knees. Mom rubbed my back soothingly, allowing me my moment. After I’d collected myself, I sat up straight and nervously began,

“There’s something I need to tell you. Something I should have told you a long time ago.”

I stood and began pacing, nervously rubbing my hands and trying to craft the perfect sentence.

“Okay,” I paused my steps. “You might be mad or you could be really worried about me. To be honest, I wouldn’t blame you if you’re both. But please, try to understand why I kept it from you for so long.” “Darling, is this about you having the Force?” “Yes,” I exhaled loudly, “I’m sorry that I hid it from you for…wait, WHAT?”

Mom sighed as she looked at me lovingly, “Sweetie, I’ve known since the minute I met you. You practically radiate it.” I can only imagine how ridiculous I looked with my jaw slack and my brows furrowed deeply,

“W-wait,” I waved my hands, “If you’ve known for this long, why didn’t you just tell me?”

Mom raised her eyebrows and smiled, “Now, I could ask you the same thing.” I tilted my head quickly as if to say ‘fair point’ and crossed my arms, awaiting her explanation.

“Soon after we adopted you, Luke came to visit. As soon as he saw you, his eyes lit up and I could tell he knew. He pulled me aside and told me he hadn’t felt the Force this strong in someone since Ben was born.” I clenched a fist at the name spoken, but kept my focus on her words.

“He told me that when he met you, he had a sudden vision. He didn’t tell me the details of it, even when I pushed him, but he said he couldn’t. All he told me was that it was imperative to your journey that you discover your powers on your own.”

Imperative? Journey? What had Uncle Luke seen in my future? Mom continued, “We told your father, he never knew what to make of Luke’s premonitions but he trusted him. So we waited, waited for you to discover your power and tell us,” she gave a half shrug, “But you never did. Though when you were seven, I began to sense that you were feeling things like fear and shame. Am I right in assuming that’s when it happened?” I bowed my head and nodded.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” “Because,” my head shot up, “Because the first time I used my powers, I used them in anger and it terrified me. I was so afraid of what I was capable of, I didn’t use them again for years.” Mom gave a slight nod, “I can understand that. Well, I can’t tell you how glad it makes me that it’s out in the open. But I sense there’s something more to all of this that I don’t know.” I blew my cheeks out and shook my head, “There’s a lot more. Do you remember the night on Chandrila when I took the Falcon?”

“Vividly.” she retorted, giving me the mom look that made every child feel guilty, no matter their age.

“It wasn’t that I couldn’t sleep,” I went on, “I’d been communicating with…him, through the Force. That night, I sensed he was in danger and he didn’t answer me. I knew something was wrong so I took the Falcon and flew to Yavin 4.” A single tear fell down my cheek as I gathered strength to relay the next portion to her, “It was just as Uncle Luke said. Once I found him, I tried to reason with him but he was too far gone to listen to me. He turned on me and we ended up dueling. I managed to knock him out and was able to escape before he woke up. But not before grabbing this…” I reached into my jacket and unclipped my lightsaber, displaying it for my mother. Her watery eyes widened slightly, but she still maintained her calm composure.

“I can’t explain why I took it, I just felt compelled to. Since then, I’ve been training with it and in my abilities to use the Force. I’m learning trial by error, usually I do it in the forest or in my room. I started carrying this,” I rolled the saber in my palm, “With me a while back, I just felt safer having it on me.”

I set the weapon down on Mom’s desk and placed my hands on my hips. The next chapter of my story made the one I’d just finished telling look like a fucking fairytale…

“Then yesterday happened.” “Y/n, you don’t have to tell me anything you’re not ready to-“ Mom began.

“We fought again,” my voice wavered, “Rey, Finn and I had just escaped the oscillation station and were racing to the Falcon. He found us somehow and I was furious about Dad and of course,” I chuckled bitterly, “He knew every single button to press, I attacked him and was pretty much ready to kill him.”

My face was wet with teardrops now and I’d turned away from Mom, too ashamed to face her.

“He tried to get me to join him and that was when I woke up and looked at myself. I’d spent so many years worried I’d become him and... there I was, ready to strike him down. I dropped my lightsaber and told him no, I wouldn’t join him. Just like that night at the temple, he tried to kill me. If it hadn’t been for Finn, I wouldn’t be standing here. We ended up fighting again, except Rey stepped in too at one point. The last conversation me and him had was him threatening to kill me and wipe out the Resistance and me admitting that my brother was gone.” I ran a hand through my hair and turned back to my mother, her face was unreadable. She was staring at the wall, I could practically see the gears turning in her head.

“I’m so sorry, Mom,” I whispered, “I’m sorry I couldn’t protect Dad, I’m sorry I failed the promise I made you yesterday. I’m sorry I kept all this from you and I’m sorry that you have to live with another family member with the Force.”

Finally, she turned and said, “Why do you think you owe me an apology?” I shrugged and dropped my hands at my side, sniffling loudly as more tears fell.

“Y/n, I’m sorry that you felt you needed to keep this from me. And I am beyond sorry that you had to go through all of this,” she stood and crossed the room to me, “Darling, people like you and I who posses this gift will always admit to having had moments of struggle with their emotions. But that does not make them bad people or too far past help. You’ve done this on your own for so long, honey, it’s time to let go of any shame or guilt you may feel.” Twenty years. I’d hidden this from her for twenty years, I’d been afraid of myself for twenty years. With her last sentence, I felt the chains I’d bound myself in break and I suddenly felt more like myself than ever. I sobbed out of relief and my mother threw her arms around me. We stayed like that for a while, grieving and rejoicing together.

——————

The machines being used to monitor Finn’s levels beeped and hummed steadily. I sat in a chair next to him, watching his chest rise and fall, reminding myself that he’d be okay. He’d risked his life to protect Rey and I, how was I supposed to repay that debt? I guessed that he wouldn’t be leaving the Resistance once he woke up, I’d have plenty of time to think of ways.

A knock on the wall broke me from my thoughts, I looked up to see Rey. She was clothed in a new set of clothes, a white tank top, a flared grey vest, matching arm wraps and dark pants that were hemmed at her calves.

“I looked for you last night but I figured you were probably busy,” she shared.

“Yeah,” I grunted as I readjusted myself in my seat, I’d been here a while, “Last night wasn’t a great night.” “Understandable,” she pulled up another chair and sat on the other side of Finn, “I’m so sorry, Y/n.” “There wasn’t much time for condolences after, was there?” I remarked, raising my eyes to meet hers. She looked like she was holding back a thousand questions and explanations.

“Rey, I’m doing alright,” I reassured, crossing my legs and settling into my seat, “Even if I wasn’t, we need to talk before you leave.”

Rey nodded and her shoulders relaxed with knowing she wasn’t intruding on my grieving. She proceeded to tell me how at Maz Kanata’s castle when she’d gone to retrieve Finn, she’d felt something pulling her in a different direction. She’d ended up downstairs and had opened up the chest to reveal Luke’s lightsaber. When she picked it up, she’d been subject to a terrifying vision that she said felt more like a bad dream. I had to stop myself from laughing, I knew nothing about those…

Maz found her there and explained to her that the lightsaber was calling to her. Rey had wanted absolutely nothing to do with any part of it. She’d run into the forest, that’s where BB-8 caught up to her and the First Order arrived shortly after that.

“Ren found me there, he used some mind trick on me that caused me to pass out,” she explained, “The next thing I remember is waking up restrained and he was there. He tried to extract the map from me, Y/n, he was inside of my mind but somehow, I was able to enter his.” I had my chin propped up on my fist, leaning my weight on the chair’s arm, “I’ve no answers for you as to how you did that, I’m not as advanced as you may think.” “Whatever it was, I was able to do it without even thinking about it,” she continued, “After that, it just got stranger.” She explained how she’d been able to use a Jedi mind trick on a Stormtrooper to let her out and leave her with a weapon. Now that I had heard of, but never attempted to do. The thought of messing with someone’s mind felt invasive to me, but perhaps necessary in certain situations. Rey had made her way through Starkiller Base undetected until eventually running into us. “We saw you scaling the wall of the base,” I smirked, “Thoroughly impressive.” Rey smiled slightly and ducked her head down. We were at the part of her story where she didn’t need to fill in much,

“I didn’t expect when I reached out for the lightsaber that it would come to me,” she disclosed, “But Maz was right, it called out to me. I’d never used one in my life.” “Then that’s even more impressive than the wall climbing,” I chuckled, I was doing what I could to lighten the mood a little.

“I don’t know what my place is in all of this,” she said, looking around the room, “But I know I want to be a part of it. I just don’t know yet what this power I have is.” “Well,” I began, “I can fill in a few blanks. You’re obviously gifted with the Force, Rey. I have the same power, though I’ve gone untrained since I discovered I possessed it. I was just a kid and I was terrified of it up until today, so you’re already a few steps ahead of me when it comes to acceptance. Everything I know about the Force I know because of what I’d overhear from my family, what I saw in Kylo or by figuring it out on my own. I need help too, same as you. That’s why I’m glad one of us is going to go find my uncle.” “And you’re okay with me going?” she asked hesitantly.

“I’m incredibly grateful,” I specified, “I need to do my job from here for a while, but also selfishly I’m not ready to head back out yet. Not after what happened.”

“Your father,” she leaned forward, “Was a good man. He showed me kindness without even knowing me.”

I squinted, “I’m not sure we’re talking about the same guy.” Kind was not have been the first word I would use to describe Dad.

“I mean it, he offered me a job on the Falcon working for him when we were on Takodana.”

“Ooh,” I inhaled, “I’ve worked on that ship with him many times before. He was arrogant, yelling orders left and right. Constantly looking over my shoulder to make sure I was doing everything right.”

“So I wouldn’t have liked it?” Rey asked.

“Nah,” I smiled nostalgically, “You would’ve loved it.”

Rey smiled widely, “Even though the circumstances weren’t ideal, I can’t tell you how thankful I am that you and I crossed paths.” I beamed, “Me too. When do you leave?” “I’m actually on my way out now, but I wanted to find you and check on Finn,” she replied, “He’s going to be alright?”

“That’s what the doctors told me this morning, it’ll just take him a while to wake up.” “Good,” she was looking him over with such caring eyes, it felt like a private moment.

“I’ll give you a minute with him, I’ll wait outside for you. Take your time.” I stood up and walked towards the door, but not before stopping to place my hand on Rey’s shoulder. She slid hers over it and squeezed gently, our close knit trio was about to go their separate ways for the time being. I exited the room and shut the door so that Rey had privacy if she needed to say something to Finn. After a few minutes, she came out the door looking as ready as she could for what lay ahead. We walked through the base mostly in silence, until Rey picked up on how many looks we were receiving.

“Why are so many people staring at us?” she whispered.

“Word travelled fast about what happened on Ilum,” I replied as I smiled at a waving worker, “I think we’re considered heroes now.”

“But what did I do? You guys did all the work.” “You got us into the oscillation station, plus you’re headed to go get Luke,” I said, “Get used to the word, you’ll be hearing it a lot.” Rey simply shook her head in surprise as we exited the building. There was a large crowd gathered outside the Falcon, people were eager to see it off.

“Now I don’t have to tell you to be careful with the ship, do I?”

“No, but why don’t you just to really drive it in?” she smiled.

“Gladly,” I said, “The Falcon means everything to me. I grew up on it, I’ve lived in it, I learned to fly on it. And now,” I stopped before the crowd noticed us, “Now it’s the last piece of my father that I have. If you have any questions, Chewie will be with you and he knows the ship just as well as I do. When in doubt, ask him. Please don’t take any chances with her unless you absolutely have to. You’re a fantastic pilot so I know you’ll do great. Just treat her well, she’ll protect you.” “Of course, Y/n. I’ll bring her back in one piece for you.” Rey assured me, I believed her.

“I trust you,” I placed a hand on her arm and we began walking again.

The crowd cheered as they caught sight of us, they wished Rey luck as she passed them by. My mother was at the front awaiting our arrival, she pulled Rey aside and I went to say goodbye to Chewie and R2. Chewie embraced me as soon as I got close enough, we both shed a few tears into each other. Short on time, we had to pull away sooner than desired.

“You keep Rey safe and do the same for yourself,” I ordered, “Direct orders from your commander and un-biological niece.” Chewie purred in reply, promising that they would be okay and that he loved me.

I hugged him one last time, “I love you too, fuzzball.” I went over to R2 and kneeled down, “I just got you back, now I’ve gotta say goodbye.” I’ll come back and I’ll have Luke with me.

“I know you will, I’m sure he’ll have missed you.” If he was going to miss me then maybe he SHOULD HAVE TAKEN ME WITH HIM.

“Hey, hey,” I laughed, “Don’t give him too much trouble when you see him, he’s been through a lot.”

Fine…

I wrapped my arms around him, “Be safe, I’ll catch you up on everything you missed when you get back.” I stood and turned to see Rey walking in my direction, it was about that time. Once she reached me, I saw her eyes carried the same unshed tears that mine did. We embraced each other tightly, I knew she’d be okay but I still had the overwhelming fear of losing her. After years of feeling alone, struggling with my powers, I’d finally found someone who was like me. We shared a unique bond that few could understand, we needed each other.

“Please be safe,” I said. “I will, you do the same,” she pulled away, “Is there anything you want me to tell your uncle for you?”

I sighed, “That his niece wants to hear about his vision. He’ll know what it means…”

Rey nodded confusedly, “I’m trusting you to explain what it means when I get back.” “Will do,” I replied, giving her hand a squeeze before she broke away to step on board the ship.

I made my way back to the front of the crowd to stand with my mother, catching a glimpse of Poe dressed in his commanders uniform.

“I’m assuming she talked to you before she left,” I commented.

“She did,” Mom responded, watching as the ship powered up.

“Think Luke’ll be able to help her?” I asked.

“Hopefully, he’ll help us all.”

Our hopes really did rest with my uncle, if anyone could help us it would be him. He’d helped save the galaxy once, hopefully he could give a repeat performance. I patted Mom’s shoulder and went to stand next to Poe, “Love the uniform.” “It’s itchy as hell and you know it,” he replied, sneaking a scratch at his visibly red neck.

I smirked and watched as the Falcon lifted into the air. It was harder than I thought it would be to watch it leave without me onboard. Tears began to flood my eyes, Poe must have been dialed into my senses because his hand intwined itself with mine. They’d be okay, they’d come back, I’d repeat it to myself a thousand times if that’s what kept me calm. The next time I saw my friends, my uncle would be with them. The Falcon jumped to lightspeed and then it was out of sight. The crowd disbanded shortly after, my mom was already being whisked away to a meeting. Poe and I stayed out on the tarmac with BB-8 at our feet,

“What do you have on your schedule today?” I asked.

“I cleared it as soon as I got back to my room this morning.” I tilted my head, “What for? “For you,” he replied, running a hand through his curls, “Look, when I lost my mom I was in a different mood every hour. Depressed, angry, sentimental, you name it. Whether you want to be alone or if you want someone there with you, I wanted to be 100% available.” There it was, that overwhelming, heart swelling feeling of love for him. I’d have to get used to it because I had a feeling that Poe wasn’t going to stop being this sweet. With the crowd gone, I pushed into him and kissed him firmly, pulling him closer by his collar. I’d caught him off-guard, but he settled into it quickly, his hands finding my hips. Once we broke, he nuzzled his nose against mine sweetly,

“Whatever you need, I’ve got you,” he whispered.

“Thank you,” I mumbled, “Why don’t we go back to your room and you entertain me with the story of how you got off Jakku?” He kissed my forehead, “You got it, sweetheart.” We walked back into base, hands locked together and hope in our hearts that the future was brighter than what was behind us.

————

A/N: There we have it! I’m sad I won’t get to write interactions between Rey and the Reader for a while, but you’ll finally get a healthy, well deserved dose of Poe. And I swear one day I’ll learn how to write a decent kiss scene 😂 Let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist 😊

Taglist: @m1rkw00dpr1ncess @springfox04 @constantdisgrace @holybatflapexpert @seninjakitey @tammythompson-singslikea-muppet @leilei-draws @eternal-fandoms @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @imaginecrushes @eternallyvenus @thescarletknight2014 @simplybarnes @captain-america5 @breyasficletblog @caseymcflurry @stumbleonmywords @april-14-blog @i-ievu @ultrunning @desperatelytryingtosavemyself @caswinchester2000 @meraki-loki @lovinnholland

#star wars #poe dameron x solo!reader #poe dameron fanfiction #poe dameron imagine #poe dameron fanfic #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron #rey #rey imagine #rey x reader #finn #finn imagine #finn x reader #star wars imagine #star wars fanfiction

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k-llama-llama · 4 years

Text

The Rose

TXT AU: 6th member

Sara x TXT

Sara is not having a great time at a Christmas party.

A/N: Please check out my PATREON (patreon.com/kllamallama) for exclusive posts you can’t get anywhere else, as well as lots of other cool benefits!

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Masterlist and other Follow Me links in bio!

“Look over here!”

TXT turned obediently to the photographer, smiling at the wall of cameras. Sara held up a finger heart, giving a tiny smile as they were directed to move on.

“This is ridiculous.” She said for the thousandth time that day.

“You look nice.” Soobin promised her. “Besides, the worst is over. Now we just get to mingle and have fun.”

The Christmas party that they were attending was already packed with idols, and Sara swallowed before they descended into the room. Taehyun clutched the material of her skirt in his hands, staying close by her side.

“You’ll wrinkle it.” Sara scolded.

“Like you care?” He replied.

He wasn’t wrong. Sara had put up a fight when she’d been shown her dress, even though it honestly wasn’t that bad. It had elbow length sleeves made of a cheer material, but the bodice and knee-length skirt were made of a shimmery black material. Her tiny silver heels also weren’t that bad, but she was certain she looked like some sort of lumbering giant.

“Soo-ji!” Someone shouted, drawing their attention over to the snack table.

Sara couldn’t hold back a laugh as she saw Tori arguing with Jisung. Apparently she was too loud, but she shoved him away and waved Sara and the boys over.

Tori looked gorgeous, of course, and Sara immediately envied how comfortable she looked. Tori’s dress was short and strapless, done in a bright red to match her lipstick. She tossed a carrot stick to Jisung as Sara approached.

“You look amazing!” Tori gushed, pulling her into a hug. “Seriously, I think you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”

“Calm down, Tori.” Jisung rolled his eyes. “We don’t need another dating scandal.”

Sara laughed. “You look great too. Have you guys been here long?”

Tori shook her head. “Maybe twenty minutes. But I’ve already hit my snack quota before I burst out of this dress.”

“Cookie, Noona?” Kai reached around Tori and grabbed a couple of cookies, one of which Sara accepted.

“What are we supposed to do?” Sara asked with her mouth full. “Just talk?”

“I guess so. There’s supposed to be music later, but not everyone is here yet.” Tori answered.

Someone appeared behind Sara, poking Tori in the side.

“Noona!” I.N (Sara tried to remember his name, and thought it might be Jeongin), “ I brought you something.”

“Oh, what?” Tori closed her eyes. “Please be snacks.”

“Felix wouldn’t let me. Open your eyes?”

Jeongin pulled out a rose, and extended it happily to Tori.

“Ooh, it’s so pretty!” Tori beamed. “Where did you get this?”

“They’re just giving them out.” He answered. “I really hope you-”

“Guys!” Chan’s voice carried across the room. “Let’s go, pictures!”

“Crap.” Tori sighed. “We gotta go. I’ll meet up with you later, okay?”

“See ya.” Sara sighed.

Her own boys were busy ravaging the snack table, and she didn’t really know anyone else.

“I’m going to go sit down.” She told Yeonjun. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

“You hear that guys?” Yeonjun said teasingly. “Sara says we aren’t allowed to have fun.”

“Ignoring you.” Sara sang, walking away.

There was a fountain in the middle of the room, and lots of people were sitting around it. But it felt too out-in-the-open for Sara, and she moved towards a row of benches lining the outside of the room.

Sitting herself down on the bench, she sighed in relief. Now that she wasn’t the center of attention, she felt like she could relax and just people watch. At one side of the room, she spotted Tori playing rock-paper-scissors with Felix, and to the other side, her boys had located Ateez and were busy presenting snacks.

She played absently with one of the flowers in the vase next to the bench, admiring the way the fake snow made it sparkle.

“Is Sara okay?” Hyunjin asked Tori, placing a hand on her back to draw her away from her battle with Felix.

“Soo-ji?” Tori turned around. “I was just talking to her. Why?”

“Because she’s been sitting on that bench for ten minutes, by herself, playing with a flower.” He pointed out. “She looks kind of lonely.”

“I don’t know, maybe-” Felix poked Tori in the back, giving her a knowing look.

Tori blinked. “What is wrong with you. Hyunjin just noticed that Sara is -”

“Man, she sure does look lonely.” Felix cut her off. “It’s a shame no one is keeping her company.”

“Should I go?” Tori asked. “Do you really think...”

Felix made an X with his hands, leaning forward and whispering in Tori’s ear.

Tori nodded. Hyunjin hadn’t noticed their exchange, as he was attempting to locate TXT in the crowd. But they were hidden from view, and Sara was still very much alone.

“Oppa,” Tori leaned closer to Hyunjin. “I have to run to the washroom. You should go see if Sara is okay.”

“Me? You should. You’re her friend.” He seemed surprised.

Felix rolled her eyes. “Wardrobe malfunction. Tori’s got to go.”

“You look fine, I-”

“My bra came undone.” Tori said simply. “Go. I’ll come join you soon.”

Felix gave Hyunjin an encouraging look, before placing a hand on Tori’s back and leading her away.

Hyunjin swallowed, before he made his way in Sara’s direction. This was probably a terrible idea, but for some reason he didn’t stop moving forward.

Sara looked up as a pair of feet stopped in front of her. She blinked. “Hyunjin?”

“Ah, hi?” He offered.

“Hi.” She said with a smile. “I thought you guys were taking pictures.”

“We’re all done.” He answered. “Are...um...you okay?”

“Am i okay?” Sara nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”

“Sorry, this was stupid. I just...Tori and I thought you looked lonely but then this whole thing happened with her bra so now I’m here and-”

“Her bra?” Sara tilted her head. “Nevermind. I don’t mind the company. Want to sit?”

“Ah, sure.” He sat next to her on the bench. “Oh, I brought you something.”

“You brought me something?” Sara asked skeptically. She was very confused about why Hyunjin was here, why he seemed so uncomfortable, and years of friendship with Yeonjun had lead her to never trust a surprise gifts. “Why?”

“Because...well...you didn’t have one. So I thought you might like one.” He lifted his hand, and Sara realized for the first time that it was clutching a rose, identical to the one Jeongin had presented Tori with.

She took it shyly. “Thank you. It’s really nice.”

“They were giving them out at that table over there...so I thought you might...” He sighed. “Sorry. I’m probably being really weird right now. We usually leave the making-new-friends thing up to Tori.”

“She is good at that.” Sara agreed, giving the rose a sniff. “But seriously, thanks. I love it.”

“If you’re not lonely...is there a reason you’re here all by yourself?” He asked curiously.

Sara shrugged. “I’m not much of a party person. Once the boys get bored of food, they’ll come find me. Plus, if I stand too long in these shoes I’ll probably break an ankle.”

“They look nice though.” He peered at her feet. “I mean...you look nice. The party look suits you.”

Sara wasn’t sure if she was blushing from the compliment or from stress. “Thanks. You look really nice too.”

Hyunjin looked down at his suit. “It’s kind of boring. The stylists usually save the good looks for Tori.”

“She does look really pretty.” Sara agreed. “That dress is amazing. I’d never wear it, but she looks incredible.”

Hyunjin shrugged. “I don’t know, I kinda like yours more. It’s more like...elegant, if that makes sense.”

Sara gave a small nod. “Yeah, I think I prefer this one too.”

They fell into a semi-awkward silence, both of them staring at the crowd around them.

“Tori’s not coming over, is she?” Hyunjin sighed.

Sara laughed. “I mean...she is kind of forgetful.”

“We usually call it excitable, to be nice.” He laughed. “But, I should go find her. Make sure everything is okay with her...”

“Her bra?” Sara raised an eyebrow. “You should probably do that.”

“Right.” He stood, his hands searching for pockets that weren’t there. “It was nice talking to you. I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah, for sure.” She held up the flower, still clasped in her hands. “Thanks for the rose.”

“Anytime.” He gave a sharp nod, and then practically marched away.

Sara bit her lip, giving the rose another sniff.

“Where’d you get that?” Yeonjun demanded as he appeared in front of her.

“I was going to get you one!” Taehyun protested. “Did you get it for yourself?”

Sara shook her head. “It’s from someone else. You boys took too long at the snack table.”

“Noona, they had cheese cut like Christmas trees.” Beomgyu explained. “It was important.”

“Of course.” She nodded solemnly.

“Are you having a good time, at least?” Soobin asked.

Sara wrinkled her nose, before nodding. “Yeah, I am.”

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fifteenleads · 4 years

Text

all in a day’s work (1/?)

Bungou Stray Dogs x Cells At Work.

Atsushi grimaces yet again before the mirror. As he thought— the red uniform jacket looks horrible on him. It was supposed to be tailored to his size, but the bulky sleeves aren't doing wonders for his short arms at all. The blue jeans are straight-cut with the edges folded up twice over, even after the quick alteration job. They promised to replace the pants with custom-fit ones as soon as possible, but who knows how long that will take?

At least they let him keep his black fingerless gloves. The standard white ones would only be wasted on him, given how... bloody the work gets.

"Sighing again, Atsushi-kun?"

Tanizaki emerges from the other row of lockers, an eyebrow raised in amusement. Unlike Atsushi, he chose to tie his jacket around his waist, the dark red inner fabric contrasting well with his faded jeans. Today, he wears an off-white v-neck sweater instead of the usual black roundneck. The lighter shade brings out the color of his eyes better.

"Nice outfit, Tanizaki-san," Atsushi comments, by way of greeting.

"Oh, this? Naomi offered to dress me today," Tanizaki grins, a little pink coloring his cheeks. "She's always excited to see me off to work everyday, it's a little embarrassing, really."

"I heard. She's almost graduating from the Marrow Academy, right? Good old days." The three of them were born from the same bone marrow, and Naomi had taken to calling themselves siblings ever since they have been assigned to the same dorm.

Tanizaki laughs at the memory. "Kinda? Can't say I miss being whacked by a wooden sword, though!" Their macrophage teacher, Ozaki, is known to be very strict on the erythroblasts during RBC training, but for good reason and good results. Even now, Tanizaki refuses to admit it, but his time at the Academy definitely helped his work performance by large; the year-end Rookie Award he got was definitely not just for show.

"Same here," Atsushi agrees. "Do you think we'll get to pass by the spleen today?"

"I'd rather not," Tanizaki turns up his nose at the suggestion. "I'd like to go see the dendrites, though."

"Oooh," Atsushi hums curiously. "I heard Ranpo-san's been asking after you since the other day. Do you need a wingman?"

"L-Look, let's just get to work, okay? We're running late," Tanizaki huffs, going back to retrieve his hat. Atsushi puts on his own, a floppy red forage cap that completely covers his white bangs. This, too, the wardrobe department would replace sometime later along with his pants, but it would have to do for now.

"AN-5509," he recites to himself, inhaling deeply before putting on his game face. "Okay, let's go."

"Your oxygen for the day, sir," Atsushi enthusiastically hands off the sealed package to the recipient, who curtly signs the slip over the small counter. The cells in this apartment complex have been affected by a scrape wound nearby, and are now being kept awake for days on end to meet the rapid cell division quota. Must be stressful being an epithelial cell, Atsushi observes.

"Is there anything else?" the cell glares at him, near-bloodshot eyes accentuated by deep eyebags. Atsushi gives the cell a small smile as he bows, before pushing his trolley back to the elevator. Another trip to the lungs, before he can finally clock out.

All in a day's work, he thinks.

The nearest route to the lungs from where he is would require passage through the pterygoid plexus, an inconvenience Atsushi is more than willing to avoid during this time of the day due to the heavy foot traffic. He decides to use a venule located half a kilometer away; the extra walking would help develop his leg muscles while helping him get there faster.

Half an hour passes by in a flash as Atsushi let his mind wander while traversing the curved road. He slowly returns to reality as he notices more red blood cells in the open area. From the maxillary vein, it should be easier to get to the lungs now. He starts to pick up the pace once more; Tanizaki said he'd wait at the alveolus so they can clock out together.

Just then, the earth rumbles, then shakes more violently. Small cracks give way to an explosion, sending large chunks of concrete flying.

Atsushi, too, is sent flying back a few meters, landing face down with his ass sticking up. Before he could even scramble back up, the ground shakes again as loud footsteps approach. Then:

"Well, isn't this cozy? Just the right temperature, and plenty of nutrients, too!"

A sharp claw swipes across just a few centimeters from Atsushi's forehead, and he flinches hard, eyes widening in fear. At the center of the wreckage stands a gang of purple humanoid creatures with bladed tentacles, jeering and leering at the terrified cells looking on from the periphery. "We like it here," their leader declares smugly. "From now on, this area is ours!"

As if on cue, the other creatures spread out, rapidly sending out their blades in a circumferential fashion, causing the cells to run away en masse. From the periphery of his vision, Atsushi sees a platelet knocked over by the ensuing stampede. Adrenaline kicking in, he runs over and picks up the child, hugging them tightly as he weaves his way through the panicking crowd.

'Lungs, lungs,' he thinks to himself while ignoring the persistent hammering in his chest. He has to make it out of this alive with this child, at least!

Atsushi trips over a raised crack on the road. He rotates his body by instinct to land on his back, the resulting impact sending shockwaves of pain through his hips and spine. The platelet in his arms holds him tighter, wailing loudly. Atsushi desperately wills his legs to move, but they remain powerless. He grits his teeth through the pain and fear, trying not to cry. 'Move, Atsushi, dammit!'

The cold sweat suddenly drenching him, however, tells otherwise.

Two of the invading creatures rapidly approach them, bundles of thin tentacles pointed at them at the ready. Atsushi does not hear the incoming taunts, all other sound deafened by the rapid pounding of his heart. It can't end like this!

"Red blood cells run from bacteria, not fight them!"

"You'll never survive outside the marrow, you good-for-nothing blast!"

"You're no hero, AN-5509! When will you ever learn that?!"

No... no...

His eyes remain wide open as a large, pointed claw comes down at him fast.

"Antigen sighted."

Just then, a black dagger hits the tentacle, sending it off-course. The creature looks around frantically at the source of the offending blade, before a spurt of blood bursts from its back. The other one falls, too, not a second later. Atsushi could only gape at the swift extermination, both creatures lying dead with black blades buried in their backs.

A man wearing a tattered black cape over bloodied white military fatigues approaches them, his dirty combat boots making loud crunching noises on the ground. Atsushi rolls himself to his side in an effort to stand up, but is instead pulled up violently by his collar, causing him to almost drop the platelet in shock.

Jet black eyes glare intensely at him from beneath a white cap, and Atsushi could practically feel himself being burned by the full force of the man's presence. He gulps in anticipation as the man bellows:

"Fool! Why didn't you run away?! Do you really want to die that quickly?!"

Atsushi's throat is still too parched to make any sound. The man's strength betrays his short stature and very pale complexion, unruly chin-length black hair ending in tips of white only contributing to his ferocious glare. Atsushi's lips part as they quiver in fear; it is as if he is being thrown suddenly from the frying pan into the fire.

As soon as it started, however, it ended just as quickly.

The man's eyes narrow as they regard Atsushi with disgust. Atsushi could barely react before he is again thrown back to the ground. This time, he lands on his stomach, almost crushing the crying child in his arms. It takes a few moments before Atsushi remembers to breathe.

Static noise breaks through the crackling sound from burning buildings. The man unclips the radio from his belt and curtly gives a report:

"This is R-3192, 'Akutagawa', of the Neutrophil Division. Threat has been eliminated."

(1/?)

#bungou stray dogs #nakajima atsushi #akutagawa ryunosuke #sskk #shin soukoku #cells at work #hataraku saibou #bungouhataraku

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glitterandmoondustofficial · 4 years

Text

Side To Side

Chapter 178: Hot Date

Characters: Ruby, Ikkaku, Law, Jun Rating: Teen Warnings: Sexual themes, Lingerie, Language Notes: Sorry that I've been slow on the updates. I work and go to school full time so I have no spare time. Full Story

~~~~~~

Ruby slipped on a pair of new red heels with ease. For the moment, it felt good to wear stilettos again. She’s sure she’ll hate herself later in the day but that was for later.

She smoothed out her dress before straightening her back. She still needed to put on makeup and do her hair. Her red bustier dress with matching heels was the most dressed up she’s been in months. She finally had a reason to actually get dressed up.

“Got a hot date?” She heard Law from behind her with a teasing grin and toothbrush in his mouth.

Ruby turned around and smiled at him. “Ikkaku and I are going out together.”

Law took the toothbrush out his mouth and walked over to her, kissing her cheek. “You’re going to break some necks today wearing that.”

“That’s the idea.” Law snorted and smacked her butt. “I still gotta put on makeup and fix my hair.” She started to walk into the bathroom.

“Ah.” He followed after her. He walked up to the sink and started brushing his teeth again.

“You have no opinion, huh?”

Law spit in the sink. “Not really,” he said. “As long as it makes you happy you can do whatever you want.”

“Whatever, huh?”

“Within reason.”

“And what isn’t?”

“You running off with some asshole.”

“Yes, I already hit my asshole quota.”

Law rolled his eyes and continued to brush his teeth. Ruby started to pull out her makeup, getting everything she wanted out. She washed her face, put on moisturizer, started with toner, followed by foundation, and then concealer. Highlighter, bronzer, blush. Eye shadow and eyeliner with a little mascara. Lip liner and red hot lipstick. Finished up with some powder and setting spray.

She cleared her throat and started to pack everything up when she noticed Law staring.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

She made a face. “Do I have lipstick on my teeth or something?”

“No.” He reached out and ruffled her hair. “You’re starting to put this much effort in the way you look again, it’s good.”

Ruby swatted his hand away and started to smooth out her hair. “Whatever,” she mumbled a bit flustered. She opened the drawer with all of her hair supplies and pulled out a straightener. She plugged it in and let it warm up.

“What are going to be doing today?”

“Not sure. Probably shopping, cake, lunch...you know, the usual stuff I do when I go out with her.”

“Will Jun be with you?”

“Nope. No lovers allowed.”

“You’re going to leave me by myself?” He teased her.

“The way you prefer it, I know.” She leaned over and kissed his jaw. “Oops.”

““Oops?” Since when is kissing me an “oops?””

“Since I got lipstick on you.” She lifted her hand up and rubbed the red smudge away.

“I don’t mind lipstick on me.”

“You only don’t mind when we’re having sex.”

“And?” Ruby snorted and grinned at him. “I’m going to get going, enjoy yourself today.”

Ruby hugged him, sliding her hands to his butt. “Thanks, love.” Law pulled away and stared at her with a raised brow. He stuck out his hand with his palm up, as if to ask her to put something in it. Ruby sighed and placed his wallet in his hand. “Oh, come on.”

“I need it, use your own money.” He flicked her forehead. “See you at dinner.”

“See you.”

~~~~~

Ikkaku held Ruby’s hand as they walked through the park. Ruby sipped on a smoothie with a look on her face that said she knew that she was getting stared at and that people should be grateful to be able to stare at her.

No wonder her and Captain got along so well, they were far too confident in themselves.

Ikkaku didn’t care about being attractive. She wore her overalls with a crop top. She was fine. She didn’t care if Jun found her sexy. She didn’t really dress up for anyone either. Ikkaku was fine with just being...plain. She wasn’t Ruby, who put so much effort into being attractive. She wasn’t Captain, who made sure to wear the least fashionable clothes available. She was just a normal, plain looking woman and she liked it that way.

“Do you ever wear lingerie?” Ruby asked from absolutely nowhere.

“No??” Ikkaku balked. “Where exactly could I wear it? I don’t have the luxury of a private bedroom.”

“What about a hotel?”

“Getting a hotel just to have sex?”

“Yeah? I’ve done it before.”

“With Captain?”

“No. Why does that matter?” Ikkaku rolled her eyes. “You know…”

“What, Ruby?”

“There’s an extra room on the sub.”

“And?”

“I bet you could convince Law to make a separate bedroom for you and Jun.”

“Just to have sex?”

“You can say you don’t like sleeping around guys or something like that.”

“A year and a half later? He’s not going to buy that. Besides, Helmut and Shachi don’t seem to need special treatment. And if anyone got special treatment from Captain, it would be Shachi.”

“Then fine. Get a hotel room.”

“Why do you care about me having sex so much?”

“I don’t care about the sex.”

“Then?”

“Lingerie! It’s so much fun. Don’t you want to make Jun nervous?”

“Do you like making Captain nervous?”

“Oh my god, yeah. It’s fun to watch him lose his composure.” She finished her smoothie. “Trust the slut, Ikkaku.”

“Didn’t you stop being a slut years ago?”

“It’s state of mind.” Ruby sped up and started to drag Ikkaku along. “Let’s go get you some lingerie!”

Ruby was always excitable when she got her way; and Ikkaku supposed the only person who really didn’t let her have her way was Shachi. Everyone else on the sub was fair game though. Especially their captain. But Ikkaku didn’t care, because Ruby would always do whatever the crew wanted her to do. She wasn’t a doormat, but she definitely had trouble saying no to everyone.

Ikkaku followed the red dressed woman in front of her into a lingerie boutique. There was...a lot. Lace, frills, satin, leather...Ikkaku didn’t know where to start. It’s not like she’s ever worn lingerie before. Ruby looked like she knew what she was doing, though.

“I know it’s intimidating,” she said. “The first time I was in a lingerie shop I was overwhelmed.”

“Like five years ago?”

“Actually, I didn’t start wearing lingerie until I started a relationship with our dearly beloved captain. I was so nervous. I didn’t like the way it looked on my body, at first.” She threw her smoothie cup away in a trash can. “But Law made me confident and so I started to buy more. Stuff I liked, stuff he picked out, etcetera.”

“So…”

“Let’s get you something that you like! It’s fun, I promise. If you start to get uncomfortable, we’ll leave.”

“You know, I’ve tried on plenty of clothes for you, but this is definitely not something I planned on doing.” Ikkaku sighed and walked up to mannequin. It had a navy blue teddy on it.

“Yeah?”

“It’s...blue.”

“That is your favorite color.”

“It’ll make my boobs...uh...you know…”

“That’s the point.

“Ah.”

Ruby giggled and walked up a rack that had a red, see-through babydoll, with a silk bow in front. Ruby held it up and showed it to her.

“For you?”

“For you.”

“I don’t like that...too...girly.”

“Alright. Well, let’s look around for a bit more.”

~~~~~

Ruby and Ikkaku walked onto the Tang to see some of the crew playing catch on deck. Captain was seated against Bepo, reading a book. Ikkaku watched Ruby grin affectionately. Ikkaku rolled her eyes, Ruby didn’t really hide the fact she was in love.

Captain looked up from his book before closing it. He stood up and started walking towards them. No, Ruby. Ikkaku supposed that he didn’t really hide the fact that he was in love with Ruby either. At least not in front of his crew.

“Did you get enough?�� He asked flatly.

Ruby grinned and shifted the many bags in her hands. “Probably not,” she set down the bags. “Got you something.”

“Oh?” He blinked. “It’s not clothes again, is it? I told you that the clothes I have are fine. You know...”

Ruby ignored him as she lifted a pink bag up. That pink bag had lingerie in it. She knew that because Ruby had somehow convinced her to buy her own little pink bag. He took the bag she offered with an annoyed look in his eyes. He had already decided that Ruby had bought him clothes that weren’t ugly. He sighed and looked into the bag, the tissue paper crinkling softly. Her captain’s face went from annoyed to calm in a flash. He coolly looked up from the bag and handed it back to Ruby.

“Don’t want it?” Ruby teased him.

“Get your bags.” Ruby obediently picked up her shopping bags. “Lets go, I want to try it out.” He started walking into the sub.

Ruby shot Ikkaku a smirk and skipped after him with a giggle. When she reached him, he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, causing her to laugh.

“Ugch.”

Ikkaku blinked and turned to the source of disgust. She raised her eyebrow at Jun. “What?”

“They’re disgusting.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” Ikkaku nodded. “Uh, hey,” Ikkaku cleared her throat. She took a deep breath and looked at Jun’s curious face. “I was thinking that maybe we could spend some time together, off the sub…”

“Like dinner? A date.”

“Not exactly.”

“What do you mean then?”

Ikkaku cleared her throat and blushed. “I got you something, too.” She shoved the pink bag in Jun’s hands.

“Uh, okay?” Jun peeked into the bag and her pale cheeks brighten to a deep red. “Oh! I see!” She shifted. “Well...we should go! Try this out, I mean.”

Ikkaku took Jun’s hand and started to drag her off the sub. “I know of a place where we’ll have some privacy, just the two of us.”

~~~~~

“How was your day?”

Ruby smiled as Law kissed her bare back. “It was good.” She turned from her position on her stomach to her back. She wrapped her arms around Law’s neck, smiling up at him. “I’m sure my hair is flat and my makeup is all smudged now, though.”

“Yes to the makeup, no to your hair. You have sex hair.” He brought his hand up and ruffled her hair for emphasis.

“Perfect, we match.” She giggled and Law kissed her forehead. “I need to shower.”

“Then go shower.”

Ruby started to sit up, kissing his chin as she did. Law let her stand up and he laid on his back on the bed. “How was your day?” Ruby asked as she picked up the lingerie that was on the floor.

“Fine, spent it doing nothing.”

“Then why’d you need your wallet?”

“I went to a bookstore. Didn’t find anything.”

“Ah.” Ruby walked into the bathroom. She heard Law shift on the bed and stand up. “You joining me?”

“Never said that. Maybe I want to brush my teeth.”

“Uh-huh.” She grinned when he wrapped his arms around her. She hugged him happily, with her cheek against his skin. “Oh, by the way, I’m supposed to tell you that Ikkaku and Jun won’t be home tonight.”

“Where will they be?” He raised his brow at her. “Are they safe?”

“They should be. Jun can handle most people.”

“Where are they?” He asked again.

“A hotel.”

“Why?”

Ruby looked up at his face and stared at him. “To have sex.”

“Ah.”

“Mmhmm.” They stared at each other for a moment. “Want to take a shower?”

“Yeah, let's do that.”

~~~~~

“Have fun you two?” Penguin snickered at Ikkaku and Jun as they walked onto the sub the next morning. They both stared at him annoyed. “Come on, I’m just teasing.”

“Whatever.” Ikkaku grumbled. She looked over to see Ruby on deck, with a mug of coffee in her hands. She wasn’t nearly as glamorous as yesterday. She was in an over sized sweater and leggings. Her hair was pulled back and her glasses were on. She was talking to Captain quietly. He looked offended to be awake and was barely acknowledging anyone’s existence. “Let’s get breakfast.” Ikkaku took Jun’s hand.

“Sure.” Jun squeezed her hand. Ikkaku brought Jun’s hand to her lips and kissed it. Jun blushed brightly.

“Gross!” Penguin yelled. “Stop being cute!”

“Shut-up!”

“Are Ikkaku and Jun are at it again?!” Someone yelled from inside the sub.

“Yeah!”

“What kinda cutesy lesbian stuff is that?!” Shachi called from the other side of the deck.

Ikkaku groaned and started to drag Jun along as they were teased and laughed at. She supposed she deserved it, she definitely did it to Captain and Ruby (especially Ruby). She heard Ruby giggle and shot her a look. That made her giggled harder. Captain sighed and took her coffee from her and started drinking it, pulling her attention away from Ikkaku and Jun.

Ikkaku smiled as they walked into the sub together. Maybe she will ask her captain about that spare room.

#one piece #one piece fanfiction #lawxoc #law x oc #trafalgar law #side to side #sela ruby #ruby sela

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firebirdsdaughter · 5 years

Text

Quick, while the ibuprofen kicks in!...

... Zi-O 20 raw!

In no order:

Are the Wozes gonna be switching off for the recaps now?

Okay. Why has my computer managed to learn Geiz, Tsukuyomi, and Sougo’s names but not the word ‘the.’ So every time I mistype it as ‘teh’ I have to go back and fix it?

I’ve already watched this once, Kuro Woz, I know you’re lying to me. Or maybe it’s just your wishful thinking.

Sougo needs to learn that Geiz’s main method of tacit communication is punching things.

Geiz’s eternal war against having feelings. The boy is losing.

Honestly, though, he’s probably also got some pent up aggression right now, and Hiromu was being so obnoxious I’m not surprised someone as intense as Geiz would want to punch him at some point.

Sougo has come to the conclusion that if he just yells Kuro Woz will show up. And honestly, Kuro Woz has yet to prove him wrong, so...

Shiro Woz is conveniently in suit during this whole opening so that Keisuke doesn’t have to change costumes too quickly.

JK I know scenes are often filmed out of order to make things like this easier.

Congrats, Kuro Woz, you’ve been promoted from Another Rider detector to teleportation service!

Were Ora’s fingernails painted before?

God, I hate Shiro Woz’s laugh.

But on the bright side (literally) my precious tsundere child is so pretty and I love him! He looks so sad here I wanna give him a hug... ^^

While I listen to the theme. Fun fact is that the image translator I use for the mandarin/Japanese subs (there’s both on the versions I watch) periodically translates random words into things like ‘kiss’ and ‘hold’ and other romantic-esque stuff. It literally at one point translated one of Geiz’s lines to Sougo as ‘I want to kiss you’ it was hilarious. The fact that it just does it completely randomly sometimes.

Anyway, Hiromu’s a good actor. Like... His movements are all really fluid and he comes across and really confident? I dunno. I like it.

Geiz is moping around outside, and Tsukuyomi literally just made a ‘really?’ face at him. XD

He’s too embarrassed to come inside, bc that might make him have feelings, so he’s hiding outside pretending he’s angry.

You know Geiz trusts you when he’s willing to at least sort of admit to having feelings around you. This is super cute, actually. I wanna more about the history w/ these two as well... Also him worrying about what Sougo is gonna do is so cute. You do care.

Geiz and Tsukuyomi on their own is really interesting, though. He's much less guarded around her, and she obviously knows him very well.

OH MY GOD. YOU CAN SEE IT. YOU CAN SEE THE EXACT MOMENT HE GETS THE IDEA.

Also this ep was literally Geiz playing Shiro Woz and I love it.

Ya know, I was kind of hoping we’d get some info on Tsukuyomi’s past with this... After all, she’s the other member of the cast we can almost certainly confirm has dad-angst. Admittedly, that’s probably more related to dad getting dusted by Puma Zi-O after pushing her to safety, but...

Come to think of it... Why hasn’t that ever been brought up? Like ‘yes, Sougo, I know you want to be a good overlord and all, but in the future you literally killed my father, can we discuss this?’

Geiz is looking sadly at children playing w/ their parents and I want an explanation.

Apparently he’s here to see Shiro Woz. ... Why is Shiro Woz hanging out at a playground, that’s creepy.

Though the translation was apparently ‘contact.’ But then... How did he contact him?

Geiz just looks so very tired right now. That would definitely be my response to this bastard.

What the hell does Oct-Sox mean? What the hell is Sox?

They’re all so cute though, it’s unfair.

Oh, wow. He goes right at Sougo. That was super obvious.

Geiz is like ‘oh my god, just go already, I only have so much pent up aggression I can throw at this oaf, he’s too cute and I’m kinda fond of him at this point.’

That’s something I kinda wanna write at some point. Like, the fact that Sougo is just so tiny and adorable that he’s like a puppy that makes people instinctively feel the need to protect him or something. And Geiz is just like ‘no what the fuck.’ That was a bad explanation, hopefully it got across.

I’m getting the implication that the Ride Watches have turned into ‘whoever grabs it first from the holder’ and that is bloody hilarious to me.

Okay, so he deHenshins him, but... Sougo isn’t actually that injured. He’s fine, he gets back up and fights later. Geiz actually did him better than Sougo did him during the OOOs thing.

Sougo is picking on Woz again. Woz is literally like ‘you do this every time’ and Sougo looks so proud of himself. This is so funny.

Woz is trying to tell Sougo what to do, and Sougo is like ‘nope.’ And Tsukuyomi’s like ‘please do kill anyone.’

Like I said, this whole ep is Geiz playing Shiro Woz and I support this endeavour.

I love how Tsukuyomi clearly knew very well that Geiz was way softer than he was trying to act, bc she’s straight up giggling at Sougo asking her the same thing. Like, I’m sure she is worried about how this well turn out, but she knows both her boys are going at it w/ good intentions.

Also the fact that they both turned to Tsukuyomi. She’s their glue and they know it. It’s like that line from Harry Potter ‘We won’t make it ten steps without her!’

Aw, Sougo’s so happy to know that Geiz was worrying about it, too. XD

I think she’s noting that originally, Geiz wouldn’t have cared what Sougo would do. And that’s true and it’s cute and I love it.

Sougo just figured it out.

I love how Geiz pauses in front of the door, for some reason.

He literally uses Shiro Woz to get around Ora’s time freeze. I don’t know if he thought that far ahead in the moment from the beginning of the ep, or if that was what he was asking Shiro Woz about before, but that’s freaking brilliant.

Also, it’s totally the feathers. Is there a time bird?

The fact that Shiro Woz is hiding by the air conditioner units writing in his Nook is bloody hilarious to me.

The wild Hiromu is confused.

Geiz is like ‘hell no, I just attacked you guys before so that the asshole in the beret would believe me enough to negate Ora’s timestop’

Shiro Woz here, to ruin everything. Shut up dude, Geiz isn’t sure he wants to do it that way anymore.

Also, side note, the image translator did it as ‘Your mission is to defeat the ostrich.’ And now. I can’t.

It’s interesting how, even though they both wave their arms around, the Wozes are different. Kuro Woz is very stationary w/ his arm waving, while Shiro Woz’s body often follows his arms and does weird noodle motions.

Sougo showing up to back Geiz up. *clutches at my chest and cries bc cuties*

Geiz is mortified at having been caught having and acting on feelings, especially by Sougo.

Okay, so these room shots are nice and dramatic, and everyone looks quite well, but... Where the devil are they? What is this place? I know I joked about air conditioners but that was a joke I don’t actually see any.

He’ so embarrassed, oh my god. I love my tsundere baby so much.

Hiromu’s like ‘holy shit, dude.’

Still would like to point out that Geiz clearly went way easier on Sougo during the ‘fake fight’ thing than Sougo went on him during was was allegedly a fake fight. Though, I will absolutely grant that those had slightly different circumstances. But still.

The only valid things about Shiro Woz is his suit, his henshin (which I still unfortunately love) and the fact that Keisuke seems to be having a great time playing him. That’s it.

I feel like it should be meaningful that Sougo’s breaking out the Double Armour for this. Ya know, the show about partners and their unbreakable trust in each other. Or maybe I’m reading too much into everything. Probably the second one.

I think they changed the effects of Hiromu’s Rider Kick?

A for effort Sougo. But we can’t be beating the tertiary Rider just yet.

‘Who are you?’ ‘I am... Red Buster! No! Wait! Shit! Wrong show again!’

Okay, so he’s just like ‘it’s your mother,’ but... How does he know who his mother is? Has he already met her? How old is Hiromu? My first guess is in his twenties, but hat doesn’t confirm anything. I’m assuming this will be made clear once this is subbed, and the main issue is my not knowing any Japanese and the clunkiness of online translators.

Hiromu thanks Geiz and Geiz’s response it to immediately look away awkwardly. I love him.

Shiro Woz just straight up backhanded Geiz and that is extremely rude. Also let go of Hiromu you meanie.

Shiro Woz has already cottoned on to the fact that Geiz is too good to do what he wants. This is bad.

Geiz why would you take something this guy hands you? Though it’s also freaking adorable how his first reaction is to try and hand it back to Hiromu.

Also, Shiro Woz looking minority offended at Geiz’s first response being trying to give it back.

Also all three of them are still wearing their Drivers and this is somehow hilarious to me.

Aw, Hiromu smile! So sweet! Your hat is still dumb, though, sorry. XD

I am not comfortable w/ the weird electric Watch shock or Shiro Woz at all. I strongly suspect that he’s gonna try and force Geiz to do what he wants at some point.

Doesn’t Geiz Revive have two forms? That looked like only one of them... Maybe him getting the other alters time again? Hmm... Be really cute is he got mind controlled into using one form and then achieves the other by breaking out of it?

Well, Sougo’s clearly at least slightly worried. I’d be freaking out. But I guess at this point this kid might have hit his ‘weird’ quota.

Okay, I think he’s saying something about ‘You have to defeat the Overlord, so you can’t have feelings for/about/care about him’ something like that. Too late loser. Though I can see Geiz trying (and failing) to distance himself just in case, not bc he wants to, but bc he’s scared of actually being hurt if he does have to do it. Did that make any sense?

Hiromu is literally like ‘holy hell, are you okay?’ but also like ‘I... don’t know what I can do if you’re not and now I really don’t wanna cross this guy... Don’t have much choice...’ Like, him looking back in concern was really sweet.

My melodramatic, friendship etc. obsessed side is like ‘Nooooo! Sougo, why didn’t you go after him!’ but my logical half is like ‘oh, gee, I don’t know, maybe the unconscious man on the ground, probably in need of a hospital?’

Tsukuyomi’s outfit was cute again this ep, and I wish I could’ve seen more of it.

Still really hoping Sougo at least tried to look for Geiz. Like, he’s very valid in being super down at the end there after that weird shit, but I really wanna know he at least tried. Like he probably did have to get home, but he must’ve had time to at least try to look...

Apparently, nobody questions why it looks like Kuro Woz just came from upstairs.

Any conversation about what just happened is prevented by Junichiro’s appearance! Man, of all the times, Oji-san.

Also Kuro Woz just ‘ya’d again. That was it. That was all he said.

Kuro Woz just whips out the Zi-O power up and hands it to Junichiro. Like... Why? What is going on here? Sure, Junichiro is acting like he doesn’t recognise it, and maybe he doesn’t. But maybe he also is the one who originally made the Ride Watches, in the past or the future?

Also, Kuro Woz, did you have that the whole damn time?

Maybe Another Ryuuga is the mirror world version of Shinji? And that was why he was creepy smiling? Bc that smile was creepy!

Sougo has to fight his mirror self, it seems. Also, looks like the boys are back together. So either they found Geiz, or he got home on his own. Hoping there’s a ‘we were so worried about you’ scene. I’m also hoping that one day, Sougo, like, hugs Geiz, and Geiz freaks out and is like ‘is this an attack? Am I being attacked?’ and Tsukuyomi’s just like ‘no you nincompoop it’s a hug I know you’ve been hugged before you big baby.’ What? I have absolutely not imagined something like this/already put it into a scene. Sort of. Too bad that at this rate, no one will ever see it.

Also, does mirror Sougo mean Geiz is going to finally have a go at ‘Guess Which is Which?’ Bc I would love there being a time where that happens and he nails it, and then tries to pretend his knowledge of Sougo/ability to tell the difference was not sentimental at all.

Oh, my god. Like that episode of Gekiranger, where Retsu got switched w/ a mirror monster and only Gou noticed? Like, Sougo gets replaced by something, but Geiz, Tsukuyomi, and even Junichiro notice? It would be so cute!

I used the word cute a lot in this post, didn’t I...

Alright, well, that’s all for now. Virtual shortbread for anyone who read my nonsensical ramblings all the way down here.

The tea and the shirts remain on standby if necessary.

Which is not gonna make sense to anyone who didn’t see that one dumb post I made ages ago. XD

Oh, right. And my fave image translator moment from this ep:

I can totally imagine Shiro Woz saying this.

#Kamen Rider Zi-O #Firebird Rambles #literally #pretty sure half of this makes no sense #Zi-O Spoilers #have I mentioned I love Geiz?#my precious tsundere son #long post #anyway #that's all for now folks #Timey Wimey Rider

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brerediddy · 5 years

Text

the resistance (with you by my side)

summary: what happens after the Marshal tells Hermann to go find Newt following the attack on Hong Kong. (newmann; fluff & slight h/c).

Hermann didn’t hear much else after the Marshal mentioned Newt’s name. Once the initial tragedy had been avoided, the only thing he could stand to think about was his fellow scientist—out in the middle of city name, alone and possibly dead. But he couldn’t think of that at the moment. No, he had to remain optimistic. Newton had survived the attack, gotten the kaiju brain, and was perfectly fine to continue on with his asinine and perilous drifting scheme. That being said, Hermann could feel the anxiety pooling in his gut. White knuckled, he gripped his cane as he was boarding the helicopter that would take him to the other man.

So much had become clear in the past twelve hours. He had found Newton prone, seizing on the floor. That alone was enough to send a shockwave through his collected system, throwing off the balance of years worth of rivalry. Then. Well, then, the Marshal has suggested that Newt drift again. As if the first time hadn’t nearly done the biologist in. Hermann tried to focus on his own matters. The numbers; they made sense and they were consistent and they didn’t scare the absolute shit out of him. Well, no more than normal. The numbers didn’t risk their lives in the name of science. Hermann hadn’t considered a loss of the other scientist before that moment and he never wanted to again, after the fact. Yet there he sat. He twiddled his thumbs absently in the helicopter, his mind wandering to Newton’s situation once more. Not only did he go into the bone slums—a heinous place filled with known criminals—but he went to strike a deal. Now, Hermann knew the other man. As much as it pained him to admit it, he knew Newt better than he knew most anyone else. And it was due to that surety that he could say that Newton’s mouth would get him killed. Or at least seriously injured. Really. The man, as smart as he was, had not one ounce of self-preservation when he was amongst his peers. He was always the one to stand up to bullies in the Shatterdome, resulting in a black eye or such. He was the only one who could turn a simple negotiation into a blood match. Hermann was sure of it.

When the helicopter landed, the bubble of anxious energy building in the physicist’s chest was hitting its peak. He would know, soon, how his lab partner had fared in the attack. The city itself wasn’t looking promising. Buildings were crumbled, blue entrails lined the streets. Sirens were still wailing in the background. It was exactly what Hermann expected to see, and yet, the thought of Newt in the middle of it all changed the image. Newton. Small, scared. Running with all the finesse of a man who hadn’t run since grade school. Newton, coming face to face with the creatures he admired so much; Newton watching the jaws open through teary eyes, accepting the inevitable. Hermann really hoped that Newt hadn’t just accepted the inevitable. Pushing the unpleasantness away, the man continued on his quest. His one and only objective was in bright lights such as on a marquee: N E W T O N. His legs carried him towards the body of a kaiju, where the other man had to be (if he had survived). As he approached the humongous creature, he couldn’t see the biologist anywhere. Surely he would be in plain sight, yes?

He grew closer and closer, his heart pounding against his rib cage and his lungs expanding more frequently than they were meant to. Newton Newton Newton. Where could he be? He had to be here. He had to. Hermann clenched his jaw, eyes still frantically scanning the area. Dark hair, glasses, chaotic energy. Find those and it was a surefire map to the other man.

But he could find none of those things. Newton was nowhere to be seen. But, Hermann reminded himself, that didn’t mean anything. Maybe he’d just be on his way from a shelter somewhere. Maybe he was busy with a different kaiju brain. But Hermann couldn’t imagine Newton not wanting to investigate the fresh specimen right in front of him. He had to be here. He had to be. In the middle of his panic, a hand clasped his shoulder. It was warm and familiar and soft and electric.

“Herm-“ a voice said as Hermann began to turn around. No sooner could Newton finish his sentence before the taller man was wrapping his arms around the shorter, bringing him into a tight hug. He couldn’t bring himself to care about PDA or professional boundaries at this point: he was just overjoyed that the man was breathing.

“Newton, you’re alright,” he said. it was more for his benefit than for the other’s.

“Yeah, dude. I’m okay.” Newton’s tone was calm but he hugged back a little bit tighter than was necessary.

Hermann released his hold just enough to glance at the other man, checking him over for any major injuries. When he couldn’t find any, he let out an involuntary sigh of relief. Hugging Newton close to his chest again, he said, “I can’t believe how idiotic you are.”

“Right back at you, Herms,” Newton said, smiling that smile that suddenly made Hermann’s stomach flip. They released each other, the physicist still looking over Newton for irregularities.

“What happened to you?” he asked, raising a gentle finger to trace near the blood on Newton’s forehead.

“Oh, you know. Just kaiju stuff,” Newton responded with a shrug. At Hermann’s stern look, he amended his statement. “I tripped. A few times. They’re tracking me now, man. One found me in the shelter. Then the baby, dude, it came right after me. It was crazy.”

However scared Newton was (and, oh god, he was), his eyes still lit up with glee at the mention of the monsters. He had gotten his wish—seeing a living kaiju up-close.

“Tracking you? Because of the drift?” Hermann was almost too afraid to ask. Newton was on their radar. Newton was at more risk than Hermann even thought possible.

“Yeah. Hannibal said something about it before...well, before.” Newton looked at the ground unpleasantly. “Anyway. I only have so long to harvest this brain, so.”

He began to step away from the other man when Hermann reached out a hand, grabbing onto his art-covered wrist. “Newton, wait.”

The biologist was silent for a moment, eyes wide. His glasses were cracked. How had Hermann not noticed that before?

“I’m glad you’re alright.”

Newt grinned again. He patted the other man’s hand with his own and said, “I’m glad you’re here. I really needed...someone. I’m glad it’s you.”

Hermann swallowed and tugged the shorter man close to him yet again. Their eyes met, Newton looking up with a trace of wonder. The taller man leaned in before he knew what hit him, pressing his lips to the biologists.

The kiss was short and sweet, more the product of curiosity and impulsivity than anything else. They pulled apart in a hasty manner. Newt was wide-eyed, his mouth shut for once. Hermann’s face heated up, his eyes averting to the ground as he rapidly stammered out an apology. “I don’t know what came over me, Dr. Gieszler, I’m-”

“Do it again,” Newt said. His eyes were shining and he smiled up at the man. “I want you to kiss me again, Herms.”

“Oh,” the physicist said. He connected their lips again, pulling in the other man by his waist. They fit so well together and it was incredible. They both knew the clock was ticking, knew there wasn’t time for this, but it was impossible to pull away from the magnetic draw of each other. Hermann hated how much time they had wasted not kissing.

They broke apart once again, grinning at each other. “You’re not just kissing me because I almost died, right?”

“No,” Hermann said quickly. “Well. I suppose to say no wouldn’t be fully truthful. I’m kissing you because I want to. Because I care for you greatly. I didn’t realize just how greatly until I thought I might have lost you.”

Newt nodded like this made sense. “I’m glad you figured it out, then. We should do that some more later.” He went in for one more hug, wrapping his arms around Hermann’s middle like his life depended on it. “I’m glad you’re here to see me off before the drift.”

Hermann frowned. The concept of Newton going in at all wasn’t pleasant; however, the thought of him doing so alone? It simply wouldn’t happen. Hermann wouldn’t allow it. Deciding that he would remedy the drift-situation when it became relevant, he let out a breath and allowed himself to enjoy the embrace.

It had been mere hours since Newt’s first life-threatening experience and yet Hermann had broken his quota for physical contact over and over again. He supposed that it was okay: the apocalypse called for these sorts of things. Newt fit perfectly in Hermann’s arms, closing his eyes and sighing. He could afford one more second of peace before diving into another nightmare. Besides, with Hermann by his side, he could handle anything.

#newmann #pacific rim #newt gieszler #hermann gottlieb #hermann x newt #fic #fanfiction #my writing

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pottercrew · 6 years

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Change pt 2

This is the continuation to this snippet (I tried to make it open in a new tab but I’m pants at this stuff) that I posted last month. I hope you like it. All snippets and continuations will be added to my pottercrewsnippets page and tag if you want to find them! (BTW I have no beta so if there are mistakes please tell me and I’ll fix them) Hope you enjoy <3

Malfoy,

I’m sorry about the other day, please let me explain.

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Malfoy,

I tried to visit but the wards are too strong, please, I'm sorry let me explain, I want to do it face to face.

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Malfoy it's been weeks please let me know you're okay

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For fucks sake Draco! Where the fuck are you? I know you're getting these as Alexander comes back empty handed! Just let me know you are okay! I'm shit at this fuck

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Draco please

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Draco Malfoy,

I hope all is well, I heard about your mastery, congrats.

Harry J Potter

Eight years later

“No”

“What do you mean no?”

“I mean no Potter, as in, no, you are not getting a sign off to get Acromantula venom for whatever the hell you want to use it for” Draco sighed, and he gave Harry a droll stare over the small green garden table they were sitting at. He noticed Granger and Blaise trade a confused look at each other over his and Potter’s conversation. He couldn’t say he was surprised. They didn’t know the amount he and Potter had to interact at work, this was probably the first time they had seen them interact since the trials years ago and he couldn’t blame them for their concern, but this was nothing new for him, hadn’t been for over five years now. Or earlier a small voice in the back of his supplied, but Draco quickly squashed it, he wasn’t going there, was going to think about those months after the war.

Potter rested his head on his hand and sighed, looking up at Draco through his lashes, like that would work now. Potter had pulled that one on him the third time he had come storming into his lab asking for forbidden substances and Draco had been so mad he had refused Potter entry to his lab for a month and heavily threatened his staff with redundancy if any let him in. “Please”

Draco just snorted “No” and took a sip of his tea, placing it gently back down on the table. That look never worked on him and Potter knew it, he was being smug about something, and Draco was instantly suspicious. When Potter wanted something for whatever the hell he did, he always had something to trade with Draco to get it. Unfortunately, Draco knew Potter knew what he wanted, or what he could give him to get what he wanted and Draco knew better than to think Potter wouldn’t go that far. But when Potter threw himself back into his patio chair with the look a fake annoyance that Draco knew so well, he knew he was beaten.

“Would you sign it off if I told you I have a fully signed and approved order form for a small amount of unicorn blood, purely for ministry testing?” He said, admiring his nails and Draco felt himself freeze, tea cup halfway to his lips. The bastard knew he would say yes to that, he knew how much Draco needed that rare ingredient for his current tests into the potions he was currently going over for his ministry quota.

“My office at 10:30 and you’ll have your damn venom” He said before taking the sip he was going to.

“Thank you” Potter smiled, and Draco had to look away at the rush of satisfaction that flooded him when he realised he had made Potter genuinely smile. He really needed to get over this stupid little crush on the boy who lived.

He looked around the back garden they were all currently residing in, hoping it would take his mind of off the way the tips of Potter’s canines showed when he smiled. They were here for Luna’s birthday, she had gathered them all at a beautiful magical hotel in the middle of London surrounded by magically hidden fauna rising high and giving the backspace they were sitting in a secluded feel, contrasting the size of the garden space that had to be a quidditch pitch long and wide, with two lily pad ridden ponds randomly placed.

Luna had invited everyone she could from the looks of it, not that Draco minded, no one could say no to Luna, she deserved the world and everyone would give it to her if she asked. Speaking of the birthday girl, Draco saw her socialising with a group of witches he didn’t know (something that his father would be rolling in his grave about as he made it his life’s goal to know everyone of importance) by one of the small ponds. Her deep purple dress set off her shining blonde hair that cascaded down her shoulders and back, looking like a fairy, well, the muggle interpretation of the fey, especially with the backdrop of such diverse plant life.

Draco’s attention snapped back to the table he was sitting at when he felt a small kick to his shin. Blaise and Pansy were looking at him like he had a third head and he knew instantly what it would be about when he noticed the absence of Potter and Granger who must have left while he was watching the host.

“What the hell was that?” Pansy whispered, eyes narrowed slightly “Kept this little friendship between you and Potter rather quiet haven’t we?” She teased before taking a sip of tea. Draco knew she wasn’t mad, there would be no reason for her to be, they were all adults now and Draco had seen her talking to Granger earlier so she really couldn’t say anything.

“Oh please Pans” Balise said, leaning back in his chair, “we both know what’s going on here, how could we not?” At the look he and Pansy shared Draco felt himself becoming defensive, something he never normally was with these two, and something he knew they would notice. He took a slight breath before schooling his face into the most aloof expression he could.

“And what would that be?” He asked, knowing full well what the answer would be.

Pansy smirked “Like you don’t know what we’re going to say Draco, we’ve been teasing you about it since sixth year”

Draco just rolled his eyes, picking up his cup and taking another sip, it wasn’t his fault that his eyes drifted to where Potter was standing next to Granger talking to yet another witch Draco couldn’t name. And it definitely wasn’t his fault when he found his eyes glued onto the spot where the back of Potter’s top drew up when he rubbed the back of his head, revealing something black peeking out-

“See” Pansy huffed and Blaise laughed shaking his head. “Potter isn’t the only attractive man in the world Draco”

“Oh so you admit Potter’s attractive then?” Blaise asked his brows raising and Draco could tell this was an argument from a previous conversation that he did not want anything to do with.

“Fine, yes I admit it but come on, look at him” Pansy explained, waving a hand towards Potter’s direction. Blaise did, and Draco watched his dark eyes sweep Potter’s body.

“Oh I know he is Pans” Blaise drawled and Draco rolled his eyes. These two were insufferable, before Pansy could answer however, Potter was back and he fell back into the spare chair by Draco, head flopping back.

“You would not believe how much Jillian Greenbanks talks” He moaned, flopping his head back forwards and Draco had to curl his hand around the arm of his chair to stop himself from pushing back the dark hair that fell into Potter’s face.

“Well Potter, I’m sure she was just so enamoured to be talking to the chosen one and all” Draco quipped.

Potter just snorted, pouring himself more tea from the self warming tea pot in the middle of the table. “Well she should go be enamoured with Ron or Moine” He mumbled, dropping two sugar cubes into his cup and giving it a stir.

“Yes well I’m sure she would have gotten a better conversation out of either of them two” Draco responded, watching the way Potter’s fingers wrapped around the cup and not the small handle.

“Yep” Potter agreed, taking a long sip from his cup. He was just about to say something else until a crack of apparition filled the garden.

Draco turned to look, along with everyone else and was quite surprised to see a woman, clad in all black standing by the foot of the stairs leading into the hotel. What was most striking however, was the fabric mouth cover she wore that blended into the neck of her robes, her mouth and nose covered showing only her deep dark eyes staring straight towards their table. She had black hair tied up neatly in a bun making her look like a ballerina but Draco knew better. Draco had never seen anyone dressed like this but he had heard of it, with black robes fit so tightly against her body it was almost scandalous but Draco knew combat fabric when he saw it. She was a hit wizard, that he knew at least, however that wasn’t helpful seeming as the term ‘hit wizard’ was an umbrella term for a number of different jobs, kind of like unspeakable. What held Draco’s attention most of all however, was the sigh that left Potter’s mouth when he caught sight of her.

Potter stood up, and everyone’s gaze went to him, then back to the mystery woman. He just headed over to Luna, a look of guilt on his face. “I’m sorry Luna” He said, rubbing the back of his neck “Work and all”.

Luna just smiled, waving her hand “It’s no problem Harry” She said, her eyes never leaving his face.

“I’ll be back for dinner” Potter said a look of determination in his eyes “I promise”.

Luna beamed, hugging Potter quickly “You better Harry James”

Potter smiled at her one last time before heading towards the woman, who’s eyes look sympathetic.

“I’m sorry Cap, they wanted you in at seven this morning and I was able to push it back till now”

Potter just shook his head, his eyes looking troubled “You shouldn’t have had to” His voice was soft and Draco felt more curious than he ever had before about what Potter did for the ministry. As quickly as the woman had appeared, her and Potter disappeared in a wisp of smoke.

The sound of conversation built slowly back up again around him and Draco felt his eyes going to Granger and the look of worry etched into her features. Did she know what Potter did? Did she know why he was so scarred? So secretive? So different, mature and intense from the boy they had both known from Hogwarts. From the looks of it, she did not, and Draco knew it bothered her, like it bothered him.

The rest of the lunch went by just as slowly and uneventfully as it had started, but not in a boring way, in one of those ways that had you pleasantly relaxed and both looking forwards to what was next and wanting to stay in the haze of what you were doing.

By the time dinner rolled around Draco was feeling a bit more lively, his curiosity about Potter had faded to the back of his mind. Or so he thought. It came flooding back however as he was sat staring at Potter’s empty dinner seat across from him on the great table that Luna had set up in the hotel’s dining area. It was lovely, all pastel blues and pinks fading into each other. But the empty chair seemed to take something away from the evening, so did Granger’s worried looks aimed at said chair.

He sat back in his chair and saw Pansy wink at him from up the table and he couldn’t help but smirk back at her. She was chatting up one of the witches Luna had been talking to most of the day and from the way the witch was eyeing Pansy, it looked like it was going well. Not that he could blame her. Pansy did look stunning tonight, well, she did have his and Blaise’s help all afternoon in her room helping her pick something to wear. She had declared her mission for the night and neither had anything better to do than to help her. Her flowing red dress and sharp red lipstick were hard to look away from, added with a necklace that plunged down her revealed cleavage and her curled bob and the witch had no chance.

He heard a slight cough next to him and turned towards Neville who had just sat down in the seat next to his, an easy smile on his face as he looked at Draco and Draco found himself returning it. He and Neville had shared an easy friendship ever since they had both gone back to Hogwarts to complete their apprenticeships a year after the war. It had been tense at first, seeming as only a few had come back and they had to share a common room, but slowly as the years passed, they managed to create something akin to friendships between their lessons. Now Draco saw Neville at least once a month at the Three Broomsticks when Neville got a weekend off from his professor duties.

“Still regretting not taking the potions professor position Draco?” Neville joked, placing his napkin on his lap.

“Merlin no, working with the ministry and everything they throw at me is a hundred times better than teaching third years thanks ever so” Draco laughed, fully turning towards Neville now. They joked about this quite often and Draco knew Neville was still a bit disappointed in him not working with him at Hogwarts but Draco just couldn't bring himself to. It would have been nice, teaching in one of the only places he had been able to slightly avoid his father when he was younger, but there were too many memories, too many painful emotions there that he just couldnt take the job when it was offered to him.

So now he worked in his own lab at the ministry as potions master, signing off and making potions for the different departments to use. It was a good job, one that Draco loved, a little too much if anyone was to ask any of his friends, the pay was good and so was the fact that he had a number of staff to boss around. He ignored the part of his brain that said there was another reason why it was good involving the man who was currently absent and focused on what Neville was saying.

“Crazy kids this year I swear they get worse every year. You wouldn’t believe all the new rules Mcgonagall has had to introduce just this term, you lucked out”

Draco arched a brow “Really?” He asked, that was another reason he was glad not to be teaching. He really didn’t know whether he could handle a classroom full of kids, not like Neville.

Neville, Draco had came to notice over those tentative years back at Hogwarts, had finally found the self confidence he had been missing before the war. He was finally confident in what he was doing, he was confident in Herbology and looking after students and Draco honestly found himself smiling every time he saw Professor Sprout’s successor. He had grown into his looks as well, much to Draco’s attention. Gone was the scrawny clumsy boy from their youth, replaced by a self assured, tall, broad attractive young man with a smile to die for and a twinkle of mischief in his eye that Draco definitely would have pursued back in their apprenticeships if he hadn’t been getting over his obsession with the other ‘war hero’. However he had come to adore the friendship he and Neville held and wouldn't do anything to disrupt that. Plus, it didn’t help that Neville knew of his feelings towards Potter and their past from a drunken night in their common room after everyone else had gone to bed. If Draco thought about it however, that night had been the making of this friendship, both of the opening up on the floor leaning against armchairs and highlighted by the flickering fire.

“Yeah but I really don’t wanna talk about work now” Neville laughed, picking up his glass and watching it fill itself “What did you pick?”

“Feta watermelon salad, Lentil cottage pie and the chocolate mousse, you?” Draco replied and he smiled as Neville rolled his eyes.

“Veggie week is it?” Neville asked, knowing full well it was.

“Yes” Draco took a sip of his champagne and felt a small twinge as he caught sight of the empty chair again.

“Chicken Pate, Crown of Lamb and the chocolate mousse too” Neville replied, looking longingly at the empty plate in front of him. “I wish they’d hurry up though, I’m starved” He moaned and Draco laughed.

“You’re always starved Neville”

“Yeah well, you didn’t have to travel all the way from Scotland to get here” Neville joked

“You flooed you prat” Draco snorted back.

“Yeah well, I’m still hungry” Neville grumbled and Draco laughed again, really, he missed the times they had had in the Three broomsticks. Seeing Neville drunk for the first time is honestly one of Draco’s fonder memories.

“Potter’s still not back then” Neville casually remarked after they had finished joking and Draco just finished his drink off.

“Nope” He held his glass out and watched as the pale liquid slowly filled it, bubbles just reaching the top.

“Ah”

“Ah indeed”

A silence fell between them that made Draco’s foot start to twitch. Fucking Potter, still fucking things up even when he’s not here. Draco was so deep into thinking of ways to break the silence that he almost missed what Neville was saying.

“Never mind, look who just walked in, just before the food as well” He whispered and Draco turned slowly, trying not to make it obvious.

Yes, that was indeed Potter rushing through the doors of the dining room, pulling at his tie, hair wild and out of breath. That wasn’t what had Draco staring though, no, it was the long red mark running from the bottom of Potter’s right eye down to his chin that definitely wasn’t there before he left. Draco heard Granger’s sharp intake of breath and he felt his hands curl into fists. He really shouldn’t care, he really shouldn’t feel himself getting protective and angry at the cut on Potter’s face like he saw Granger be. He had no right. So he turned back to Neville and found his warm eyes on him, a look of curiosity and sympathy in them.

“It’ll be alright mate, dangers of the job” He murmured and Draco just nodded in his direction, knowing full well that Neville knew as much as Draco when it came to Potter’s job. He was an unspeakable, that’s all they knew and all they would know. Everyone knew however that unspeakables turned up dead more often than not.

Draco saw from the corner of his eye Potter lean down to murmur something into Luna’s ear, probably his apologies for being late. Luna just nodded and smiled, pointing towards Potter’s empty seat and Draco felt himself go rigid as Potter turned towards them.

“Well, it looks like we get the envious company of the Chosen one tonight” Neville joked, nudging Draco in a gesture that Draco knew was to cheer him up and snap him out of his mood together. Draco forced his swirling thoughts to the back of his mind and smiled back at Neville.

“Oh how delightful”

Neville just snorted into his glass and took a quick sip before smiling brightly at Potter as he sat down opposite Draco. Draco had to force himself to not look at the mark on Potter’s face when he turned to face him.

“Busy day Harry?” Neville asked innocently, smiling.

“A little” Harry laughed, getting comfortable in his seat.

“Really Potter” Draco drawled, leaning back “leaving lunch early and being late for dinner, bad form”

Potter’s eyes found his and Draco felt his fingers clench at the intensity in them “Ah my bad” Harry smiled and leaned forwards “how rude of me”

“Yes well” Neville interjected “it’s good to see you again mate, been a while”

Potter’s intense eyes snapped to Neville and Draco felt himself let go of the breath he didn't know he had been holding.

“Yeah, sorry about that” Potter had the decency to look sheepish. “Work and all” he offered and Neville snorted in agreement.

“Know what you mean, I thought Mcgonagall was harsh as a teacher, she’s worse as a boss”

Both he and Potter winced at that and Draco couldn’t help but notice the way Potter had relaxed slightly, not fully, he still eyed the doorways before responding to Neville, but he was leant back in his chair, and easy smile on his lips.

“I don’t know how you do it Neville to be honest” He laughed.

“Me neither” Neville admitted “But I love it, though, it would be a lot more enjoyable if this one was there with me” he thumbed at Draco and Draco rolled his eyes yet again, what was it with him and surrounding himself with friends like this?

Potter’s eyes went from Neville to Draco and back again quickly with a look in them which Draco thought was judgement before quickly vanishing. “Oh really?”

“Yeah mate, the things we got up to during our apprenticeships” Neville replied wistfully, a small smile playing on his lips and Draco caught on immediately. Whoever thought that Neville was an innocent unobservant wizard was heavily mistaken. Draco kicked his foot lightly in warning but he knew the look in Neville’s eyes, had seen it enough times when Neville acted as his self appointed wingman and knew he couldn’t stop what was happening.

Potter looked back at Draco, but Draco didn’t look him in the eye, just held out his glass to be refilled. Draco must have done something good in a past life however, as at that moment the starters appeared on their plates, the smell of food suddenly cutting through the conversation as everyone looked down at their plates.

“Before everyone starts eating” A voice fell over the room and everyone looked to the top of the table where Luna was sitting next to Ginny Weasley. “I just wanted to thank everyone for coming this weekend, I’m very grateful”

“Happy Birthday Love” Girl Weasley said, holding up her glass and everyone followed, raising a glass for their host.

“Happy Birthday Luna” Everyone said before taking a drink.

Luna laughed happily “Thank you everyone, now you can start, I know how hungry you all must be, especially you Neville” She said, smirking down the table and Draco felt Neville shift next to him.

“You know it Luna” He called back and Draco knew he’d have that devilish smirk on his face that let him get away with everything “All that travelling”

Draco couldn’t help the snort of laughter that came then at the ridiculousness of the situation, but luckily everyone had started talking again. Neville chuckled next to him before he dug into his starter. When Draco looked up, two green eyes were staring at him, a look he couldn't place in them. Draco couldn’t help his gaze from sweeping the red mark on Potter’s face and Potter noticed.

“It’s nothing” He said lowly, enough for only Draco to hear.

“Doesn’t look like nothing Potter” Draco sniffed, picking at his salad “Whoever the healer was did a shit job, I’ll see what I can do on Monday”

Potter smiled that damn smile again “Thanks”. Draco ignored the feeling he got from that, honestly he was pathetic.

#pottercrewsnippetseries #Changes #Pottercrewwritings #Draco Malfoy #Drarry #Harry James Potter #drarry fanfic #snippet

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resonance-and-d · 6 years

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Random bits of Hogwartstuck AU I may or may not write

Dave Lalonde, the letter is addressed to.

It's not your last name, but when you looks closer, you sees that instead of just an address, it also says, "The hidden apartment, small bedroom."

The return address says, "Hogwarts."

You are curious, and it's not like this Lalonde guy who shares half your name is gonna come get the letter. It doesn't even have a stamp on it, what the fuck.

You open it.

The letter inside is full of crazy shit. A school of witchcraft and wizardry. Magical book lists. They want you to reply by owl.

Welp. That's a prank, alright. You would suspect John, but it's too weird to be a prank from him- John is a lot of things, but a subtle mindfuck like addressing a letter to the wrong name is a bit beyond him. Nope- this is meant for someone else.

You toss the letter in the garbage along with the junk mail, and don't think much more about it.

The next time you gets the mail, a couple days later, there are three more letters, identical to the first. None of them have stamps, and they're all addressed to Dave Lalonde.

"Huh," you say. When you open one, it is the same as before. Book list. Supplies. Welcome letter. Reply by owl.

You look up to see an owl on a bike rack outside.

"The fuck?" you say.

The owl is large. It also looks exhausted. It looks at you with an intelligence you usually associate more with corvids than owls. Crows are the smart ones- owls are generally pretty dumb.

You think, well, why not?

You find a pencil and scrawls a hasty reply.

My name's Dave Strider, you writes. I think you're sending this to the wrong address or something. Great prank though, I've got a couple friends who would be super impressed. I like the weird parchment, that's a nice touch.

You go outside. The owl is still there.

"If you bite me," you says, "All the crows around here are going to mob you. They know me. They like me. I feed them."

The owl just stares wide-eyed. Because it's an owl, and doesn't speak English. Duh.

You cautiously approach. There's a little tube on the owl's leg, ready for a letter. You roll up your reply and stick it in. Mission accomplished.

The owl nips you a bit and then flies off.

"Fucker," you mutter, and when a passing troll gives you a weird look you flip him the bird.

The next letter, the next day, is addressed to Dave Strider, and that's when you get really annoyed. Bro is on the couch when you walk in. You toss the bills at Bro and walk into your room with the letter.

"What do you have there?" Bro asks.

"Stupid prank letter," you say. "Someone trained an owl to deliver letters, can you believe it? I didn't think owls were smart enough to train."

The next minute, the letter is torn from your hands.

"Hey!" you say, spinning to face Bro.

Bro is already reading the letter.

"Well damn," he says. "I thought for sure you must be a squib. Hell if you ever showed any talent when we were strifing."

"Huh?"

"You're a wizard," Bro says, monotone. "Congrats."

You can never tell when Bro is fucking with you, but you're pretty sure this has got to be one of those times.

"Whatever," you say. You finish the walk to your room, and shut the door.

"Egbert, John," the hat calls out. John walks up to the stool, looking slightly nervous. The hat sits on his head for only a moment before it announces, "Gryffindor!" Ther's a lot of applause from the table in red. You're kind of hoping to get into the same house as him- he's the only person you know here.

(Rose and Jade don't count yet. You just met on the train, even if they're John's friends already.)

There are a few students in front of Rose in line. Eventually the call of "Lalonde" comes, and then, because the universe hates you, the first name that comes with it is "Dave."

Everyone looks around, especially Rose. Awkward. You maintain your poker face. You're going to run into trouble if "Strider" isn't on the list anywhere, but there's nearly half an alphabet to go between now and then. Maybe you'll think of something before you get there.

"Dave Lalonde," the professor at the front of the room repeats. She looks slightly put-upon, lips going thin.

She turns to the tall, wide man who brought you all across the lake. "Surely we haven't lost a first year since the train?"

Someone gets the bright idea to count all of you. Meanwhile, one of the girls at the blue table- Ravenclaw- gets up and walks over to chat with the professor. She looks lot like Rose (like you).

"No one missing," the man- Hagrid- eventually reports. No plan has occurred to you yet.

"I see," the woman says. She shakes her head.

"Lalonde," she calls again. "Rose."

Rose goes up. "Slytherin," the had declares after a short pause. Rose goes to the green table with applause A guy who looks very much like a younger Bro gives her a hug.

"I need to go," you announce, and push past the troll behind you-

"Watch it, fucknugget," he says absently-

-and you abscond.

You don't make it very far. You are nearly immediately lost, and make up for it by flashstepping along as fast as you can. You don't know where you're hoping to go, but you need to get away. Maybe you'll go live in the woods. The woods sound simpler than your life right now.

You turn a corner and flashstep straight into the Ravenclaw who'd spoken to the professor a few moments ago.

You both fall over. You manage to do a fuckin' pirouette over her and hit the stone wall hard enough to knock the wind out of you.

"Are you okay?" she asks, once she's made it back to her feet.

You manage to catch your breath, and sit up. "mfine," you manage. You're about to flashstep away again, but she catches your hand and the human contact freezes you to the spot.

"Dave?" she asks. She looks really hopeful, emotion written all over her pink eyes.

"Strider," you say. "Dave STRIDER, and everyone keeps getting my name wrong, or- or lying to me by fuckin' omission by never telling me about magic or where I was born, and if you have somethin' to say it had better be clear as the finest crystal because I have had it with mysterious bullshit, I have enough bullshit to start my own farm and fertilize it for years-"

She pulls you into a hug, which is kind of alarming. She's not even that much older than you- maybe 13 years old, maybe 14, hard to tell. But she's surprisingly strong.

"You're my little bro," she says. "No BS, no mysteries. Rosie doesn't know she has a twin. We never thought we'd see you again."

It isn't long before a professor comes along. "You're missing your own sorting," he points how. But he clearly sees you're in the middle of a moment, and he doesn't sound pissed. Just- worried.

"I don't understand," you say, more to this girl who says she is your sister than to the professor, who is still taking in the situation.

"Our dad absconded with you when you were a baby," she explains. "No one knows why. You've been missing all this time." She is still holding your hand, apparently afraid that you might run again, but she has released you from the hug.

You want to call BS, but she doesn't seem to be kidding. And this makes more sense than you would like to admit.

"Wait," you say. "Does that mean that Bro is actually..."

"Ambrose Lalonde," she says.

"He can't be my dad," you say in a voice that comes out small. "He's just- Bro."

The professor has realized this is a pressing issue. "Should I call your mother?" he asks the girl, whose name you still don't know.

"That's prolly a good idea," she says. "We're eventually going to need Dirk and Hal and Rose, too, but let's wait a minute on that." She looks at you with something tender in her eyes. "Dude's been through enough tonight," she says firmly. "Let's not be all overwhelming right now."

You are ushered to an office, where some "House-elves" bring you and the girl- Roxy- some food. You realize you've reached your weirdness quota for the day because you don't even blink.

#hogwarts au #homestuck #fanfic #my stuff

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boobachu · 5 years

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Why 100 reasons not to kill youself is bullshit

I’m in a bad mood and I’m bored out of my skull so I’m gonna fill out answers to that post going around

1. We would miss you. Who’s we? I left the internet a week and no one noticed.

2. It’s not worth the regret. Either by yourself if you failed or just simply left scars, or the regret everyone else feels by not doing enough to help you. Okay this is kinda true, the main reason I haven’t blown my brains out yet is fear of screwing it up and becoming a vegetable.

3. It does get better. Believe it or not it will eventually get better. Sometimes you have to go through the storm to get to the rainbow. No it doesn’t! Well, technically it gets better enough for you to feel pain when it gets worse than it ever was,

4. There’s so much you would miss out on doing. I’m dead! I can’t miss shit when my brain isn’t on!

5. There is always a reason to live. It might not be clear right now, but it is always there. This isn’t even a reason, five and you’re already stuffing this full of bullshit.

6. So many people care, and it would hurt them if you hurt yourself. Literally I can’t remember the last time someone told me “hi” or “Hey wanna do something?” No one cares I exist and nothing I can do will change that.

7. You ARE worth it. Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise. Why?

8. You are amazing. Yeah that must be why I can’t get a home or even cook.

9. A time will come, once you’ve battled the toughest times of your life and are in ease once again, where you will be so glad that you decided to keep on living. You will emerge stronger from this all, and won’t regret your choice to carry on with life. Because things always get better. Well it’s been 25 years... nope, never happening. I’m only getting worse and worse.

10. What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about the things you’ve planned, but never got around to doing? You can’t do them when you’re dead. I CAN’T DO THEM WHEN ALIVE EITHER!

11. I love you. Even if only one person loves you, that’s still a reason to stay alive. You can’t love strangers.

12. You won’t be able to listen to music if you die. So?

13. Killing yourself is never worth it. You’ll hurt both yourself and all the people you care about. Okay good?

14. There are so many people that would miss you, including me. I literally don’t know OP. This is why suicide prevention is total bullshit. No one actually cares about you, they care about making themselves feel better through platitudes.

15. You’re preventing a future generation, YOUR KIDS, from even being born. I’M STERILE

16. How do you think your family would feel? Would it improve their lives if you died? If they’d care, they’d have actually shown even a little bit of empathy.

17. You’re gorgeous, amazing, and to someone you are perfect. Bullshit.

18. Think about your favorite music artist, you’ll never hear their voice again… Who cares?!

19. You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day That’s literally the worst feeling, you have to take off all your clothes cuz it’s suddenly hot as hell and then you have to put on the jacket to leave and ugh it’s the worst. 20. Listening to incredibly loud music Who cares? 21. Being alive is just really good. It’s literally not.

22. Not being alive is really bad. You’re not even trying, you’re just filling bullshit to hit that 100 quota.

23. Finding your soulmate. SOULMATES AREN’T REAL 24. Red pandas Ew

25. Going to diners at three in the morning. Diners don’t exist! Where are these diners? I live in fucking Texas!

26. Really soft pillows. In the coffin. 27. Eating pizza in New York City. I’M POOR 28. Proving people wrong with your success. That dream died a decade ago.

29. Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life. Literally all the jerks I know are mega successes. Hell look at ProJared, Jontron, Pewdiepie! This world rewards being the worst!

30. Seeing someone trip over a garbage can. Meh 31. Being able to help other people. No one needs my help, they have others.

32. Bonfires. scare me. 33. Sitting on rooftops. SCARE ME

34. Seeing every single country in the world. No way jose. 35. Going on roadtrips. I’ve already done that, now I’m poor.

36. You might win the lottery someday. Yeah that’s stable. 37. Listening to music on a record player. Who cares?

38. Going to the top of the Eiffel Tower. I’M SCARED OF HEIGHTS STOP 39. Taking really cool pictures. WHO CARES

40. Literally meeting thousands of new people. Who don’t give a shit about me, next! 41. Hearing crazy stories. Who cares? 42. Telling crazy stories. No one cares.

43. Eating ice cream on a hot day. This really doesn’t seem worth it. 44. More Harry Potter books could come out, you never know. So murder-suicide JK Roling.

45. Traveling to another planet someday. No way 46. Having an underwater house. NO

47. Randomly running into your hero on the street. I have no hero. 48. Having your own room at a fancy hotel. WHo cares? 49. Trampolines. I HATE THEM

50. Think about your favorite movie, you’ll never watch it again. I’M DEAD

51. Think about the feeling of laughing out loud in a public place because your best friend has just sent you an inside joke Yeah, that’ll never happen.

52. Your survival will make the world better, even if it’s for just one person or 20 or 100 or more. It literally doesn’t!

53. People do care. That’s not a reason 54. Treehouses What do they care too? LOL

55. Hanging out with your soul mate in a treehouse Soul mates aren’t real.

55. Snorting when you laugh and not caring who sees I already do that, doesn’t matter.

56. I don’t even know you and I love you. Impossible

57. I don’t even know you and I care about you. More possible but still difficult

58. Because nobody is going to be like you ever, so embrace your uniqueness! Thank God, I’m a horrible person.

59. You won’t be here to experience the first cat world emperor. Big whoop 60. WHAT ABOUT FOOD?! YOU’LL MISS CHOCOLATE AND ALL THE OTHER NOM THINGS! Well I’ll be dead so meh

61. Starbucks. Worst thing ever 62. Hugs. Scare me

63. Stargazing. I’m always scared a spider will exist. 64. You have a purpose, and it’s up to you to find out what it is. My purpose is to die.

65. You’ve changed somebody’s life. So?

66. Now you could change the world. I already did.

67. You will meet the person that’s perfect for you. Nope, I’m too bad of a person. 68. No matter how much or how little, you have your life ahead of you. Actually yeah, the nazis might turn me into soap so it might be better to die now.

69. You have the chance to save somebody’s life. So?

70. If you end your life, you’re stopping yourself from achieving great things. You already said this.

71. Making snow angels. Texas 72. Making snowmen. TEXAS

73. Snowball fights.

TEXAS!!!!

74. Life is what you make of it. Which is why I want to die. 75. Everybody has a talent. Who cares!

76. Laughing until you cry. I can’t cry no matter how much I want to and honestly that’s a big fuel of wanting to die.

77. Having the ability to be sad means you have the ability to be happy. Nope, depression. 78. The world would not be the same if you didn’t exist. The world is always changing.

79. Its possible to turn frowns, upside down You literally just said this.

80. Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive. This is literally advocating suicide. Wow you suck at this LOL

81. Heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary. Be your own hero. Poor

82. Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections. No, it means waking up not wanting to die and having something to look forward to and being able to do what you really really want to.

83. One day your smile will be real. The wind blows waftfully 84. Having a really hot, relaxing bath after a stressful day. I’m too big for my bathtub.

85. Lying on grass and laughing at the clouds. I’m scared of spiders.

86. Getting completely smashed with your best friends. Alcoholism runs in the family and I don’t want that.

87. Eating crazy food. Ew no

88. Staying up all night watching your favorite films with a loved one. No one loves me.

89. Sleeping in all day. Already do that cuz depressed

90. Creating something you’re proud of. If I could, I wouldn’t want to die.

91. You can look back on yourself 70 years later and being proud you didn’t commit I’m pretty certain I’d die of famine by then.

92. Being able to meet your Internet friends. I’m literally terrified of meeting them. 93. Tea / Coffee / Hot Chocolate Who cares

94. Sherlock season three. This is literally advocating for suicide, wow you’re bad at this! 95. Cuddling under the stars. You already mentioned this.

96. Being stupid in public because you just can. Wow that’s really worth living for 9__9

97. If you are reading this then you are alive! Is there any more reason to smile? No, there’s literally no reason to smile because my future is blighted.

98. being able to hug that one person you haven't seen in years I’m scared of hugging.

99. People care enough about you and your future to come up with 100 reasons for you not to do this. You literally didn’t!

Many of these are just repeats and almost all of it is nonsense!

Like if I could enjoy any of this shit, then I wouldn’t want to die in the first place!!

Either that or your “reasons” were horrible awful things I’d never want to do.

Deadinparadice, you suck.

100. But, the final and most important one is, just, being able to experience life. Because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, literally anything could happen You mentioned this many times.

Well that was a shitload of fuck, what were they thinking?!

You wanna know real reasons not to kill yourself?

A) If you fuck up it’s going to hurt like hell

B) If you don’t die because you fucked up or if some asshole saves you, there’s always going to be something wrong with you

Whether it’s colorblindness, mental hiccups, or being a fucking vegetable, the lights are on but nobody home

C) It’s scary

Otherwise, suicide happens when you have no place in the world, when your depression gets so bad, and it ALWAYS gets that bad eventually, that you can’t take it anymore.

Like, if other people can take these platitudes and feel better, more power to ya, but all this shit just feels like being mocked.

Like it’s sooooo easy to want to live.

As though life is going to be wonderful always.

There’s literally a genocide going on along with a massive extinction event, and all the fascists, authoritrians they all got nukes so one day it could all end.

There’s nothing to look forward to.

On top of that more and more it feels like I have no place anywhere in this world.

If I were braver I’d take the shotgun and end it, but I fear pain so much I’m scared of running cuz I might trip and skid my knees.

Life is nothing but misery.

#TW: suicide #death #negativity

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