#omg i actually feel so disheartened ??? what the fuck ??????

[ughscara]

tumblr. what is wrong with you /lh

[shalomniscient]

the cinnabar's gender confusion must be a universal experience and yet it actually makes me quite sad. the fact that cinnabar usually attracts people only because of the so-called gender intrigue and her story revolves around this fact almost completely, too, is so heartbreaking, to me at least.

i want to know more about her past, want to learn more about her family (serpent eye members basically), about the way she was raised and tutored, about her habits and stuff... and all we get is some stories when numerous girls confessed to her because she was mistaken for a man and stuff. even in her files they say that other sinners find her uninteresting besides the fact she's handsome... it makes me feel so bad for her. i mean her supervision cases provide us with a bit of additional information (for example she eats a lot and doesn't really have any food preferences as long as the meal is well cooked) but still that's not enough (for me personally dunno about others).

i'm probably overreacting or something but you know... that's just what i'm thinking about constantly. she needs more love from both the fandom and the fucking creators, aisno crew should sleep with their eyes open, i'm living in their walls and i'm not paying any rent /hj

– milk nonnie

wait omg i didn't know that wtf cinna that's so sad ?? this is a sign for me to do more interros and read more lore sldhjhldjhfdlh but yeah, lack of lore for a character u rlly like can be very disheartening bcos it takes away ur chance to fully connect w them in a way, but i feel it also presents a unique opportunity for u to take their story and run with it yk? like what's the best direction you feel to take w her story? maybe it could be the most fun direction or the most compelling direction or a secret third option. it's both a deficit but also a special kind of freedom, kinda. i don't know if i'm making sense hsdjfhjhfdjl

[ceasarslegion]

Im gonna be real some of you take other peoples fanwork a bit too seriously

Like i feel the "he would not fucking say that" meme went from poking fun at like, fanfic that portrays brutal villains as uwu soft beans to legitimately bullying anybody who lifts even the slightest outside interpretation of a character beyond the canon text. And all its doing is creating hostility in fandom groups when someone makes fanwork that isnt 1,000,000% compliant to canon.

Like idk what you think fanfiction is but some people like to build on their own interpretations of characters in a story that isnt strictly canon and its getting super disheartening and annoying as hell to get barrages of "HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT OMG DID YOU EVEN READ THE TEXT DO YOU HAVE ANY READING COMPREHENSION UGHH THESE FANDOM KIDS ARE SO CRINGE" the moment you like. Write a coffee shop AU

I dont think a lot of you actually like fanfiction very much from the ways youre reacting to it lately. You dont have to fucking read it.

[wordsbymae]

Hey, just to validate your fic, i would love to read the pregnant reader doesnt matter which darling but im here for it ! I also love your aesthetics!

Also after reading your whole master list again, ii got some questions. I will be talking about big old farmer man but specifically mouses version, apart of me wonders what it would be like if they just flat out asked him why he started hanging out with em, i mean in the beginning he didnt care for them and never showed interest. Maybe mousey draws that line hard in the sad that he isnt interested so they dont take any actual flirting he does seriously. Possibly some farmer trying to slip into a normal husband role and whenever their asked they think its some kind of bully/teasing. Maybe even mousey concerned hes ruining his romantic chances and just hits him with the “You dont like me, you dont have to hang around me cause you feel bad, go live and be happy.” Cause i want him to face the consequences for his actions lmaooo

If not thats all good but just some ideas lmaooo

💜💜-🌊

Omg!!! The angst!!! Thank you so much! They were pretty fun to make! I actually kinda wanna make some for the readers as well but I'll have to see how it goes.

OK, this would probably happen after he fires the farm hand and tells him to fuck off. Reader goes over one day to say hi to her new friend and he's nowhere to be seen. Farmer tells them smugly that he left and ain't coming back. Mouse of course is a bit disheartened at this, they were really starting to like him. Now they have no friends and are all alone. Farmer is absolutely beaming. He has them all to himself.

But when he starts hanging around reader, doing things for them, inviting them over for tea. Mouse gets a bit uncomfortable. He made it clear he wasn't interested in romance or friendship except for Mouse's near-daily offerings. And suddenly he's best mates with them? It doesn't feel right. Mouse confronts him one day and tell's him he doesn't have to feel bad for them that the farm hand left without a goodbye, that they are ok and don't need their hand held.

But of course, he continues. to the point Mouse thinks he's making fun of her, that this is all a prank. I mean he's inviting her to the movies! He would never have done that before, so why now?

But if mouse told the farmer all their suspicions about his intentions, he might do something rash. He's a hot-blooded male with the emotional and social intelligence of a jack russel, if mouse keeps denying him he will resort to kidnapping.

[cwarscars-a]

🔥

Send me a “ 🔥 “ for an unpopular opinion.

i'ma shape this one around the final fantasy vii fandom and go off on my usual spiel ( or, old spiel? cause i haven't chatted it in a while lol ).

i honestly despise the lack of love that the side-characters get as a whole from the fandom. i really don't like what the remake did for the franchise ( i do love the remake, don't get me wrong, but i think it bought about some of the fandoms worst traits ), and i cannot stand the 'one rule for thee, another for me' mindset that fans have regarding characters.

let's start with numero uno - so, obviously i write heid. lol. he's not particularly liked & that's totally fine...but man. finding content for him is horrible. there's nothing. like, barely anything. the few fics that exist are either rape fics or are ( and i hate saying this ), sorely out of character. the art is few and far between and usually more bara-anime-oriented. overall, i feel like i'm drinking from a dried up well. actually, nah. there was no well in the first place.

i always understood that heid isn't exactly the character who would get much fanfare but it's so disheartening to shift through five million pics of 'x' character and find two of heid. i can't even draw ( or at least, im not at all confident in my art ) and yet i took to drawing heidegger all of the time because i had to start making content for him. and in doing so - my art gets no regonition and is totally ignored anywhere but here. i think if i drew a popular character, i'd maybe get more attention but...i can't bring myself to do so.

in general though; heid isn't the only one. even reeve is quite underrated and ignored by the fandom as a whole (or implied to be an owo cat boy which makes me cringe). even, dare i say, barret is often shoved aside in favour of the more 'popular' characters ( the whole tifa/cloud are now marlene's parents suggestion by some people enrages me, like, wtf? )

secondly, i don't like what the remake did for the fandom because i think it bought the worst out in the fans. it appealed to cloud/sephiroth shippers despite that ship making no sense. you could argue the sephiroth cloud sees is just an extension of himself. they're both essentially jenova. but the remake makes it overtly sexual / suggestive. even as i played, all i could think was 'yeah, this was done for fan service'. i don't even think sephiroth should have been seen in remake part 1. ( obviously that'd never happen ).

but whereas there are things i adore about the remake. i think that they dumbed down the story and by extension, made the worse aspects of fandom writers become apparent. like, by making AVALANCHE basically entirely innocent ( despite being literal terrorists ) - they make shinra ENTIRELY evil. in the og, shinra were weirdly nuanced. they were 'evil' sure, but then they were also genuinly trying to save the planet from sephiroth. as for AVALANCHE; yes, they were fighting on behalf of good. but they did murder people in their quest to shut down reactors. in the og, reeve even calls barret out on this. but...now we probably wont get that? like, way to go rid your main heroes of any nuance. god forbid a hero does something bad.

my final point cause goddamn is this getting long is - i despise the way that the fans talk about characters & the whole 'LOL i can ship this but if you ship that then lol stinky gross smelly ewww'.

i've always wanted to explore shinra/heid as a young men. like, really explore their relationship. potentially even one-sided ship them. i love the idea of it, it's interesting and i imagine their dynamic was similar to tseng/rufus. how many jokes have i seen about shipping them? tonnes. but it's not okay to diss any other ship. make a joke about tseng/rufus and ohhh noo, you fucked up, kiddo.

i've seen people imply heidegger is a pervert because he commented on sephiroth being good looking. literally suggesting he 'creeps' on sephiroth and people wholly agreeing like 'omG LoL YEs' - as if calling someone good looking is an alien thing to do or means immediately that you want to bang them (smh).

in general, i constantly see the fandom make jokes about certain characters & imply that if you ship them, like them etc - 'loool something wrong with uuu'. it's dumb as shit. don't be mean about other people's preferences when half of the fandom can't take being told that cloud shouldn't be shipped with whoever.

[iliiuan]

Babylon 5 S1E9 Deathwalker

My favorite psychic. And my favorite asshole politician.

The hour of scampering. Interesting time keeping system there.

What are you up to, Kosh?

Hmmm. Snake lady does not like the lady with the wrinkled forehead.

Delenn vs Na'Toth in response to mortal enemy: Na'Toth kicks more ass, Delenn does better convincing others to support her.

Do their spots turn gray, Garibaldi, or are you projecting?

The Dilgar sound like some sort of nazi society. Fitting, then, that they all died. I guess that reinforces the show's claim that genocide begets the death of the genociding culture. (What happens when two groups are both set on genociding the other?)

Hello. You seem familiar. (She's a Superman villain, turns out.)

Huh. I guess we're exploring medical ethics this week.

G'Kar is ever the diplomat. Trying to play as many sides as possible. I love that for him.

So people can just rent out psychics? Gives me damane vibes: the person with the powers can't be trusted to use them, but other people can be.

A three edged sword doesn't sound very effective my dude.

Dilgar. I feel like there's a joke there, but it's not coming to me.

Chon'kar. Nemesis? Blood feud? I like it.

Everyone wants Deathwalker's ill-gotten biomedical weapon fountain of youth.

"You shouldn't listen to rumors." That's rich, Sinclair. Listen to the rumors, Londo. It's important.

G'Kar my man, you got outplayed there. Deathwalker is so evil.

Oh yeah. Unethical medical experimentation being excused because the result is valuable provides such tasty discourse. I like that Garibaldi is taking the view that lady is unforgivable and her serum is not valuable actually thank you very much.

Crimes against sentience! Perfection!

Sorry, Earth. You don't get to protect the fucking war criminal. Well fucking played, G'Kar.

What ARE you up to, Kosh?

I guess only the superpowers get votes? Seems like a bad system. Ah. The League of Non-aligned Worlds gets a single vote. They deserve better representation.

The cowardice displayed by every major government is realistic and disheartening.

Wow. Ivanova is having a really bad day. OMG she really pulled the customer service voice and fake smile. I love how she played all of the angry customers against each other. Pure genius.

Kosh wants something from Winters. Oh. Her thoughts, apparently. Poor Winters. She doesn't deserve psychological torture.

It is fair to let Deathwalker produce her serum? Perhaps, but why would you trust this woman? Free, she can manipulate others into fulfilling her twisted desires. In a position of authority, she can stall and make promises to keep herself alive. Nothing good will come from this plan.

And there's the catch. You get immortality by killing other living beings. But that's always true? Can't you get it from plants? Does it have to be other sentient beings? She betrays her evil nature in her assumptions.

I... disagree, Sinclair. Keeping her alive to brew her potion is a stalling tactic at best. And James Holden taught us what happens when you leak random information.

JUST KILL HER NOW SINCLAIR. Come on goody two shoes. You can do it.

I guess the Vorlons killing her prevented anyone else from having culpability, so that's probably for the best. Kosh is such a dick, though. "You are not ready for immortality." Ok wise guy. Is anyone ever?

Poor Winters has PTSD from reading a psychopath's mind. And Kosh has some weird leverage over her now, though to what end is anyone's guess.

[ofmermaidstories]

Ooh im so glad you enjoy any type of comments because im so so so obsessed with something (just like this) but felt the comments i left on ao3 weren’t showing how much i really really liked it! [which is a lot, i live react to my little fanfic gc about it whenever i read/reread 😭 shout out to them for listening☝️]

NO, listen—I’m the same way!!! Writing big, analytical comments doesn’t come naturally to me (which means I appreciate the ones I get even more, because i know exactly how much time and thought they take 😭), so I understand the knee-jerk worry of, oh no, is this enough? But I do think that it’s a disservice to each other to like, have expectations of how to comment on something. 🥺 I don’t believe in rigidly policing how we aught to interact with each other’s art (beyond not being dicks). It’s—disheartening! Disheartening and fucking rude, actually, because it does two things: it treats those beautifully detailed, loving comments that people write of their own excitement as the only valid form of expressing love and it also makes reading fanfiction and interacting with each other a chore! And it shouldn’t be! It’s not! I dunno how many times I need to say this, but fanfiction isn’t homework—and that goes two ways!! You, as a writer, are not enslaved to it. You don’t need to finish to a deadline (unless you want to!). And you as a reader are not obligated to provide an itinerary of the time you spend with someone’s work!!!

It’s not the only way to love something. Like you saying that you live react it to the group chat—I don’t even know how to articulate what that means to me, to hear??? Lmfao. Because it’s so cute and it’s so fun!!! And it’s relatable, because I do the exact same thing with fics I love, to the friends that I love. 🥺 If anything, I find it easier to like, lay out what I love in a fic to a chat, if that makes sense? Because I’m not worried about the author! Like—I’m not worried about impressing them, LOL. Or accidentally hurting their feelings if I’m maybe a little confused about something, or am just extra opinionated that day. I can just say, “OH MY GOD [insert writer here] UPDATED [insert fic here] IM LOSING MYS HIT OH MY GOD ITS SO GOOD OH MY GOD!!!! [insert plot twist here]!!!!!! NOOOOOOO OMG WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS TO ME IM TOO DELICATE FOR THIS I HATE IT HERE” etc etc.

We forget that fanfiction communities are built, in large part, because of readers—readers silently reading things, or privately sharing them. Readers making tiktoks about their favourite fic (and then it blowing up and the fic getting deleted because people are mean to other fics in that same community that share the same tropes LMFAO go on, ask me about attackonfic). There’s one user on AO3 that I adore, literally, they are so precious because I see them so often in the comments of the fics I’m reading and every time it’s the same, short and sweet sentiment of how much they love whatever it is they’ve been reading, and sometimes they’ll add emojis and sometimes it’s capitalised but it gets the point across so well. They’ve commented on surrender before; it now lives in my folder for comments, on my phone, because it made me laugh when I first got it.

I promise you, Anon, if you have commented on SJLT then not only have I read it—I’ve screenshot it and saved it to that folder. Because for all I write, I don’t think I can ever adequately express what any comment means to me. 🥺 The sense of relief and—safety, almost? In being seen. It’s just—it’s there for all of them! Every comment!

If anything, I owe you an apology—I’m not good at replying to things in any timely manner 🥺 It’s never malicious, it just—it takes energy, no matter how big or small the comment (or tumblr ask!), because I want each reply to mean something, to return that sensation of hi, i see you too! It’s not an excuse. But I promise, Anon—I see you, too. And I want you (and everyone!) to know, no matter what you’ve said to me on AO3—whether it was an emoji, one word, a couple of sentences or paragraphs that took half an hour to write—it found me just when I needed it. And it meant so, so much. 🥺 Thank-you for reading, Anon. Thank-you for being here. I hope I can give you a finish story that makes those comments worth it. 🥺🌷📖✨💕

[includeangieinthesequel]

Hi!! So, I've been reading the Stoner Madrigal series for a while and I just wanted to tell you and @lariskapargitay much I love it (I didn't know witch one of you to send this so I'mma send both of you, let's hear a hurray for indecision)

In your last work someone was kinda rude on the comments so I felt compelled to write this to spread a bit of positivity (and possibly to vent and fangirl a little about your work)

SO, I got personally offended when the person said it felt like you didn't know where the story was going?? Like, I felt that burn in my soul bc if there's something I'm absolutely positive about is that you guys are not lost at ALL. Y'all know what you're doing and how to break us little by little (appreciative). LIKE ITS THE WAY I go back a bit in the works and there's little hints about stuff that happened and will possibly happen, like you're giving us clues and I feel like fucking sherlock holmes trying to piece everything together and coming up with theory's about what happened.

Also, I LOOOVE the fact that you're taking you're time writing Pepa going back and forth because this is how you do a 👏good 👏 character 👏 development. If you just made her sorry in the first few works it'd feel rushed and not worked for. Your Pepa always thought what she was doing was okay, because Vera did it too and on that note WHAT AN AMAZING WORK YOU DID AT MAKING THE OTHER FAMILY CHARACTERS???? Like all of Alma's siblings and Félix's and Agustin's family... Y'all didn't have to slap so hard but you did and I love it.

On a very serious side note, Agustin and Pepa just gave me such a bi panic??? Like the fic where they get together for a month had me wanting to scream at the top of a roof and then bang my head through a wall (but in the best of ways yk??)

But yeah, I'm really glad Pepa had to have a lot of different realizations bc my girl needed it and you guys just made her character have so many fucking layers she could fight an onion. Thank you so much for writing, the Stoner Madrigals give me life actually, I can't believe you went from funny times getting high with grammy to "yeah let's fuck this hole family and the readers mental health but like, in a good way :D yeehah"

(fun fact, I just wrote this whole thing on my notes and then went to share the ask and high pitch screamed when I saw neither of you let me go anon JDHKSJSKAJMSJSKW guess I'll just shyly die in the corner)

🥺❤️ omg thank you so much!

You have NO IDEA how much this means to me and my co-writer. We’ve had so many negative comments on the last chapter of the story. There were a few negative comments here and there after “Baby Blue” but for some reason “Dazed and Confused” is the chapter that made a lot of people upset and it was really disheartening.

So I absolutely love your kind words! I was getting insecure about the direction of the story because that’s the one thing everyone kept saying. I was even seeing posts on here of another author comparing our story to theirs and it made me really upset. That person has a great story with great reviews so it hurt that they felt the need to bring my story down to put theirs up.

This really made my morning by seeing this! We’ve been foreshadowing everything from the very beginning and the ending has been something we’ve been building for weeks as well! I said this in so many comments but it takes time to build to a good ending that doesn’t feel rushed. If we wanted a bad story then this whole series would’ve ended a month ago after the secrets came out. So, I’m glad you noticed the amount of work we’ve put into the series ❤️

Seriously, thank you so much! You deserve all the warm hugs and sunshine in the world. You’re a treasure ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🍃

[blujayonthewing]

Omg i feel you so hard on the clothes, I wear like a size 44 EU depending on the store and… um… country but I’m 176 cm tall and ALLLWAYS on the cusp of just… not being able to fit in the largest size and I’m like what the actual fuck am I supposed to do if I ever gain any more weight, it’s especially disheartening when you’re looking at exercise gear because it’s like I’m TRYING to be healthy and maybe lose a lil weight (obviously it would be fucked up even if you’re not looking to lose weight but personally I would feel more comfortable if I did lose some) but outdoor gear always runs at LEAST a size smaller in my experience and like… what for… plus I’m not that big relatively speaking, at least I can still shop at mainstream stores most of the time, and I truly wonder where people buy clothes? It’s so messed up

RIGHT EXACTLY like, when I CAN find stuff that fits me it's almost always The Largest Size, and yeah for things like exercise clothes or outdoorsing gear especially it always feels like the unspoken attitude is 'well obviously no fat people are gonna be doing these activities anyway', it sucks so bad

[rpbetter]

I'm so tired of roleplaying with people who don't put half the commitment I do into our threads and muses. I'm so tired of feeling like I'm a weirdo or like I don't belong for that. Any other hobby and people wouldn't care if I took it seriously. Why is roleplaying different? How can I keep going like this if I'm getting rudeness from all sides? I can't even go outside my already tiny bubble and find more partners, because I always see people putting roleplayers like me down and it's exhausting.

"Why is roleplaying different?"

Well, Anon, I know that was a rhetorical question, but I have some thoughts on that. To the surprise of no one!

I strongly believe that this is an issue with how fandom has come to dominate roleplaying. As I've said before, it really wasn't always like that. Of course, you always had canon characters and almost all RPers were invested in a fandom or two. The difference was that online RP was once viewed much more like tabletop RPGs are.

When the RPC became a near-total offshoot of Fandom, a lot of shit changed and very rapidly...and within Fandom, a lot of shit was changing very rapidly as well at that time.

RP has always been something looked down on (though, at least no one ever accused written RP online of being literally demonic like they did DnD, or made correlations to murder sprees like they did LARPing, so there's that) as strange, not the good, understandable sort of dorky.

Part of that is almost certainly because of the difference in the way society views writing vs the way it views hobbies like gaming - writing is seen as an intellectual pursuit and a job, gaming, even at its most negative points of view in wider society, has been seen traditionally as a downtime activity only.

But. RP was not looked down upon from within Fandom or in roleplay communities themselves like it is now.

When the whole experience of fandoms themselves became extremely mainstream and open, it welcomed in a ton of shit ideas and behaviors that were not previously prevalent. It changed RP, too, along many of those same lines.

When your hobby is considered objectionably weird by people within the fandoms you love and RP in and that makes you a sort of lowest-tier fan, the viewpoint of RP to RPers becomes something lesser than a valid hobby. When RPers are the same people who engage with Fandom monetarily, anything not monetized is passively consumable content, including RP. And RPers are trying to both deflect shame and struggling with wider society's mixed messages, that now hit them everywhere online as well. Shit like, "you don't have to monetize your hobby, it's okay to just make really good cross stitches of memes for yourself" and "if you're not paying me, you have no control over me."

We seriously do not view RP as a proper hobby anymore, that's why. There are many factors to that, those are just few, but that's the ultimate answer. It's not seen that way because it's not valued in the same way.

I think much of the problem with muns losing their entire shit over anyone else approaching the hobby differently, dare I say...more seriously, is related to a lot of complex psychology about self-esteem, control, and anxiety. So many people here struggle with serious self-worth and confidence issues, and I think to many of them, whether they realize it or not, when they see serious RPers, they feel like that's an inherent judgment and a danger to their own enjoyment. Because RP, as writing, is a skilled hobby - the more you practice it, the more skilled you become with it. Meaning that someone who approaches the writing seriously is going to be at a higher skill level.

Enter the way we're training to think about writing again - when they see someone who is very practiced, skilled, and confident with their writing, the learned idea is that they're somehow superior in a nasty, personal way.

I most certainly do not think that makes it alright, it isn't, and I'm not very tolerant of it.

It's absolutely alright to engage with RP in any way you see fit. If that's extremely casual, it's a minor hobby for you, that's great! I'm so happy you're enjoying yourself, and I mean that in no facetious way. But not when that is the only form of it respected and accepted. It's just as alright to have RP as your primary, serious hobby!

The only way we can all enjoy a hobby with such great variance within it is by respecting each other's variables, not by vilifying them. It's recognizing that, no matter how much you enjoy the mun and/or muse, they're not engaging with the hobby in the way you are, it's not a good fit to write together. (Please, begging y'all to be friends with those who are different, not enemies, shit's sake. You've not got to write together to be friends!) Instead of labeling them and being hateful. Different =/= a threat.

And, to go off a bit lol y'all demonizing serious RPers really don't get that there are some intense tones of ableism and more going on in that narrative of yours, huh?

Not that anyone requires a reason to be serious about any hobby, but when people pick a hobby like RP as their primary one...you should probably have the maturity to consider why that is. Could it be that they focus on a hobby they can do from their homes and that requires low physical involvement, and has a degree of separation from direct socializing, for a reason?

Serious RPers tend to be limited in their ability to pursue other hobbies. Mental and physical health, region, finances, and ability to spend time outside of the home are all very common limits for those who "take RP too seriously/are addicted to RP."

Maybe take five seconds away from your own issues to consider that the person you're shitting on for something so minor as a difference of importance of a hobby might be the full-time caretaker of a special needs child, having to remain home and on a very small income. They might be chronically ill or suffer from agoraphobia. They might live in an area with no hobbies of interest, affordability, or at all...or they might live somewhere that is incredibly dangerous for them.

I honestly do not know where these people have been that they've been aggressed at by serious RPers, but that's usually the excuse. (I'm not saying it has never happened or does not happen, before anyone goes there.) The idea that serious RPers are extreme elitists who are demanding that other muns do what they do, how they do it. That they expect other muns to be online and RPing all the time, that they be "available for entertainment at all times" at the cost of real-life matters. Having the expectation that threads not be dropped constantly or that a writing partner not leave for months with no contact is neither of those things.

In over two decades of RPing across almost every platform type that has existed, I have literally never seen that be either a singular RPer-type problem or one that serious RPers are even more likely to deal in. I've seen the opposite, actually. Which is not a condemnation or a statement that all casual RPers do this, just what my experience has been. And one that actually stands to reason based on the way they view and engage with RP - quick replies, quick entertainment, and very low commitment to threads, muses, or other muns. Of course, it's annoying to them when a more serious RPer is unwilling to do rapid-fire style quick, short threads from an ask with them, but is writing the lengthy replies they already owed instead.

That's probably a factor as well, in here among a plethora of misunderstanding/unawareness of differences - for many serious RPers, it's not easier and more fun to write short, quick threads. So, what a casual RPer is seeing is that they're willing to put all this extraordinary effort into a massive reply to someone else while their easy, fun, quickly done thread is waiting in line.

Misunderstandings and unawareness breed hostility, period. And there is a hell of a lot of those things in the RPC.

What serious RPers are expressing are either boundaries/expectations or frustration. Not a demand that you be around all the time, but an expectation that you leave them alone if you're not also a serious RPer who will be committed to threads and muses. Not hostility and elitism, the frustration that it's already difficult to find muns who will work out before you add in the majority rule of casual RPers.

It's incredibly disheartening, frustrating, and honestly, a bit anxiety-inducing to constantly be the weird one, always have few choices, and to be at risk of being Problematic purely because you take the hobby seriously. You can't vent without someone jumping on your ass to remind you (even if you said numerous times that "real life comes first" and "people can do what they want") that omg, people have lives, people can do what makes them happy, it's just RP.

It's so upsetting when you think you might have found a good writing partner, then, you see a PSA they've reblogged about how it's a "hobby, not a jobby," and "no one owes anyone anything, ever." Excuse me, as that last one is a direct quote, let me redo it so it is verbatim: "no one owes anyone here anything - EVER !!!"

I said I wasn't very tolerant :)

But seriously, exactly what you've expressed is why I'm not...it's another form of controlling others instead of trying your best to control your own experience, and it's often extremely hateful. I'm not tolerant of anything like that, it's no longer supporting preferences at that point. When your preference is the only one that will be tolerated in the community, it's not a preference anymore.

It's something that makes others feel isolated, afraid of harassment, and depressed. It is a hobby and it isn't supposed to make you feel like that!

And, no, absolutely the fuck not lol the "answer" to this isn't that you're taking it too seriously and need to take a break. I'm so tired of seeing that shit tacked onto RPH responses and vents and PSAs. You're not saying that RP is making you feel this way, "just take a break and come back when you agree with everyone else" isn't a solution.

Of course, if you do feel like your time here has become so upsetting? Yeah, obviously, you should try to find some other things to supplement your downtime that make you feel happier again. Engage in some other forms of writing just meant for yourself, or that can be published as fics. Spend some more time on a game you enjoy for a while, or get invested in a new one. Learn to shape bonsai or make no-knead rolls. Whatever would make you happy as a hobby when you're not here.

Other than that, however, well...we're not going to be implying on this blog that you're too serious and need to take a hiatus until you have no emotional investment in your hobby. That's insane. I'd not say it about hiking, martial arts, dog obedience competitions, hobby farming, or painting either.

I wish I could think of some solutions as to where you could look that wasn't like this, but it's definitely the majority of the RPC. It doesn't help that, due to this, serious RPers have a tendency to quietly stick together and not venture out into the RPC. They're just not incredibly easy to find.

I will say that they tend to be:

novella - if you're not here for serious RP and sticking around for a while, you're not going to invest the time and energy into particularly lengthy writing

older RPers - I would say that twenty-five is probably the youngest, with early thirties to late forties being the majority

in fandoms with a large adult base of fans - even if it's a franchise friendly to, or even meant for, younger fans, if it has a particularly active adult fanbase, it's a better chance of finding serious RPers in it

as above, old fandoms - fandoms that have been around for a long time tend to have more serious RPers in them

fandomless OCs - tend to have a higher chance of being written by serious RPers than canons or heavily fandom-involved OCs

RPers who do not do a ton of advertising for their muse(s), but when they do, they don't advertise them based on activism points or trends

slightly more likely to not have an emphasis on highly aesthetic blogs, graphics, icons etc. - they use a modified basic tumblr theme, low on graphics, their aesthetics are not on-trend, for example

anti-content policing/"write what you want" style muns

muns with more extensive rules pages - they plan to be here for a while, they take writing, RP, and their muse(s) seriously, so, it's a bit more important to them to head off problems before they start

those with older characters/FCs - be that literally in age or the character being one that has existed for a long time

"stay in your lane" style muns - if they're opining on fandom or the RPC, they must really be angry about something

those with numerous and detailed headcanons - for example, their response to a HC meme ask like, "what's your muse's favorite ice cream flavor?" is going to be treated seriously, not simply answered with "mint chocolate chip because my bby is gross"

As usual, not a complete or perfect list. I don't fit some of the things on there! It could give you some things to look for when trying to find other serious RPers, though. It's based on observances from someone who was never a casual RPer, even as a minor (me, obviously), and maybe it could at least keep you from continuously running into hostility about your approach to RP.

I've honestly considered making a list of some sort expressly for RPers who are on the more serious end of the spectrum, but...in a RPC back when things were dominated by serious RPers, I did that sort of thing with a RPH I had, and it still got labeled as being a list for and by Elitists. I don't know that anyone would want to put themselves out there for potential harassment on tumblr, you know? It was a joke then, just having a group of RPers label you as an Elitist. Here, you get told to kill yourself, and none of us need more of that shit, right?

Try to hang in there, Anon, I know it's upsetting, and I'm so sorry that something fun has gotten to be like this.

Try to understand that these people are coming from a place of irrational defensiveness, often in response to bullying themselves at some point or feeling bad about themselves. That doesn't make it right, but it does make it easier to not take to heart.

And keep at it! In my experience here, once you find a group of people you fit into, it really is...A Group. Especially among RPers who are ostracized, they stick together, they promote each other, and they're very happy for their mutuals to become your mutuals. Once you find them, it unlocks so many opportunities for the interactions and type of RP you've been missing!

[books-and-cookies]

What’s up! Historian here! I saw your post about RFK’s doc series and was drawn like a moth to a flame

It is SO fascinating to think about what the US would look like with RFK as President from at least 1969-72. I think the biggest thing that would have changed (at least from my perspective) was the US involvement in Vietnam. Nixon basically made the whole thing a clusterfuck with the Cambodian bombings and really escalating the situation- I feel that RFK would have just handled it better. The Kennedys were infamous for a lot of things, but deescalating international conflict was a strong suit of theirs because of the connections they had- Nixon just fought fire with fire.

Internally, RFK would have done so much for minority communities in America. He wanted so desperately to spread equality and finish what his brother started- the Mindless Menace of Violence speech just breaks your heart when you think about it in the context of all he could have done for this country and changed the way previous generations thought about PoC in this country. I could talk about this all day aaaaahhh

OMG I LOVE YOU thank you for reaching out!!

I was thinking the exact same thing! RFK was, if not a pacifist, very anti war - he talked extensively about how he disliked that so many billion dollars were being poured into Vietnam, instead of supporting the very poor communities in the rural United States - especially the Appalachian region. And I agree about the Kennedys being skilled in deescalating international conflicts - the documentary I watched gave JFK as an example with the Cuban missile crisis, because he was the one who brought together the heads of all internal organizations and worked together with their Russian counterparts to overcome it.

I'm sure Robert, had he become president (which I'm sure he would have, his support had been growing steadily and the Democratic nomination was all but his), would have noped the fuck out of Vietnam as soon as possible.

And yes yes to what you mentioned internally - he actually cared about minorities and POC, during a time when no one else gave a shit, and during a time when race violence was escalating and it's so disheartening to see all his work was cut short.

I was genuinely very impressed with everything I found out - like a lot of people, I only knew about his brother, JFK, and i just watched this documentary very wide eyed.

Thank you again for popping in!! *hugs*

[space-------kid]

hi there!! I really love your genya fics they make my heart feel so full 😭 i was just wondering if you could write kimetsu academy genya w the reader going supporting his shooting competitions + dragging sanemi along to prove that genya has incredible skill 💗 tysmm

Thank you so much!!! 😭💕💕💕

I’m sorry this took a while (this request is so cute OMG OMG OMG), but I hope you enjoy this! 💕💕💕 

Also, thanks to everyone who submitted a request! I hope I managed to put a smile on your faces with my writing! Thank you so much!  💕💕💕💕 💕 💕💕

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓲𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓪𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓭, 𝓼𝓮𝓮 𝒮𝒽𝒾𝓃𝒶𝓏𝓊𝑔𝒶𝓌𝒶 𝒢𝑒𝓃𝓎𝒶 𝓍 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

               “The shooting competition’s gonna be next week, isn’t it?”

               Genya tears his gaze off the target to look at [Name]. She sits on the audience stands, elbows resting on her knees and her palms cupping her chin. The way she glows with admiration while she watches him during morning practice sends Genya’s heart aflutter, and he’s filled with the need to impress her even more. Shyly, he gives her a confirmatory nod and turns to face the target again.

               “Yeah,” he tells her as he lines up another shot. He pulls the trigger and the crack of the gunshot reverberates in the training area. He hears [Name]’s delighted gasp, clapping her hands while Genya smiles with pride upon seeing that he hits the bull’s eye a third time.

               “I’ll make another banner and little flags for you, then!” [Name] exclaims, hopping off the bench and making her way to him. She picks up his towel and offers to wipe the sweat off Genya’s forehead with another of her lovely, bright smiles. He leans down so she can reach his face.

               “You really shouldn’t bother, you know…” he tells her quietly, face red from the proximity and how gently she dabs at his forehead with the towel. “And besides, nii-chan won’t even come to watch like the usual… Remember what happened last time when the school gave me an award?”

               [Name]’s expression falls at the memory. Genya has been so shaken that day, humiliation and pain fighting for dominance on his face when Shinazugawa-sensei ripped the certificate and told the former that he ought to focus on his studies – especially Maths – instead.

               It hurt her, how Shinazugawa-sensei doesn’t even seem to care about his own brother. She remembers how full of confidence Genya has been during practices and the competition itself, and how he even forgot his shyness when he gave her a hug after being crowned the champion for all three clay shooting categories. He isn’t the type to brag, but [Name] recalls how Genya – lavender eyes shining with pride – wondered how proud Sanemi-san might be of his achievements.

               It all crumbles during that day Kimetsu Academy organized an event to award certain students for their achievements in different competitions.

               Genya’s sympathizers may have increased and showed their support openly since that day, but [Name] knows that only Shinazugawa-sensei’s matters the most to him.

               “Don’t worry, Genya-kun,” she consoles him with a reassuring smile, a plan already hatching in her mind. “I’m sure your nii-chan will come around.”

--

               “Oi, [Surname].”

               “Yes, Shinazugawa-sensei?”

               The white-haired Maths teacher gives [Name] an appraising look as she stands by the doorway of the staff room, hands folded in front of her and her [colour] eyes gleaming with a mixture of worry and curiosity at being summoned. She hopes she hasn’t done anything to earn his ire – not when she’s working hard with her plans to convince the older Shinazugawa brother to come to Genya’s shooting competition next week.

               “You’re the Public Speech Club’s ace, aren’t you?” Shinazugawa-sensei asks her, folding his arms over his chest while he leans against the doorway.

               “Um, y-yes…?” [Name] replies hesitantly, still unused to the sudden attention she’s been showered with lately. She has been one of the students who are awarded alongside Genya by the school upon snagging the gold medal Kimetsu Academy’s Public Speech Club has long coveted in the interschool public speaking competitions. Rengoku-sensei is assigned to oversee the club’s participation in competitions, and she wonders why Shinazugawa-sensei summoned her for it.

               “Rengoku’s on a sick leave and he asked me to take over your practices until he returns,” Shinazugawa-sensei tells her, frowning at her diffident response. “I want you to transcribe and give me a hard copy of your speech in your previous competition.”

               “Yes, sensei!” [Name] replies, inwardly thankful that Genya has taken a video of her performance when he came to watch and support her like she does with him. She will just have to ask him to send her a copy of the video.

               Speaking of Genya—

               “Um, Shinazugawa-sensei?”

               “Yeah?”

               [Name] fidgets, looking down in embarrassment to avoid her teacher’s piercing gaze. Genya has told her that his nii-chan already knows about their mutual feelings for each other, and despite not being an official couple yet, she suddenly feels shy about asking Shinazugawa-sensei to come and watch Genya’s competition in the upcoming week.

               “Spit it out already, [Surname],” the Maths teacher tells her but not – surprisingly – unkindly. [Name] meets his gaze and sees the impassivity on the usually ticked off older Shinazugawa brother.

               “I-I…!” she blurts out, now standing at attention. Her cheeks turn red at the amused look her future older brother teacher is giving her.

               (Out of all his students, Shinazugawa-sensei seems to be tolerant and kind enough towards [Name]. No one knows that the reason for this is that he sees how supportive, kind, and patient she is towards his brother – but of course he won’t tell anyone that.)

               “Sensei, Genya’s shooting competition will be held Thursday next week,” [Name] says, her expression seeming to say it’s now or never. “Do you want to come and watch–“

               Shinazugawa-sensei rolls his eyes at her and turns away dismissively. “You should be worrying about your own upcoming competition, brat. You’re dismissed.”

               “But sensei–!”

               He looks at her, eyes narrowed with an expression she can’t name. “Drop it, [Surname]. And tell that moron to quit already. He barely even passed last time’s quiz.”

               Worry fills [Name]’s entire being. It’s her first time asking, and she’s already been shot down! What will she tell Genya?

               She turns around and leaves, hands clenched at her sides. [Name] can’t believe herself – why does she think that way? The first is not the only opportunity given to her to ask. There’s still a second, a third! If she wants to see Genya happy and for Shinazugawa-sensei to witness how skilled the former is, then why is she being disheartened at being shot down?

               Heart set with fiery determination, she turns to the direction of the staff room and pumped her fists. “Telling me to drop it won’t do, Shinazugawa-sensei! I’ll ask you a hundred – no, a thousand times if I have to! I’ll do anything to prove to you that Genya is outstanding at what he does! Just you wait–“

               “No shouting in the hallways,” comes a cold voice from behind [Name], her face turning pale at the sight of the Chemistry teacher glaring at her.

               “I’m sorry, Iguro-sensei!” she yells and bows at him, sprinting off out of sight.

--

               The week-long saga of convincing Sanemi to attend Genya’s shooting competition ends with a shouting match between [Name] and the teacher during one of her practices for the public speaking competition. The topic given to her is familial bonds, and [Name] seamlessly and shamelessly slides in Genya – though anonymously – every three sentences, sometimes subtly or even openly telling her teacher to show his younger brother support by watching the competition.

               Monday comes, and the practice devolves yet again into another heated argument between teacher and student.

               “I told you to drop it already, didn’t I?” Sanemi bellows at her, finally losing the patience he reserves for her.

               “I don’t want to!” [Name] yells back, face flushed with frustration. She is alone in one of the classrooms with the teacher – she wouldn’t be yelling at him like what she is doing now if they weren’t. “And why are you being so difficult about it, sensei? Would it kill you to watch even just one event? Why are you being so stubborn?”

               “You’re the one to talk! I don’t give a shit about Genya’s fucking obsession with guns and joining shooting competitions!” the older Shinazugawa brother rages on. “Not when he’s close to failing my subject because he’s stupid!”

               “Don’t say that you don’t give a shit, sensei! And don’t call him stupid – not when he’s trying so hard to be good at something he isn’t!”

               Sanemi stops from spewing another heated comment when [Name] begins rubbing an arm over her eyes to stop the aggravated tears from flowing down her cheeks. His arms drop uselessly to his sides, suddenly feeling so clueless at the sight of the crying girl in front of him. Genya has good friends, that much he knows (he still hasn’t forgiven that Kamado boy from frowning disapprovingly at him when he rudely commented on Genya’s quiz results). He knows as well that something is up between his younger brother and [Name], but to actually see her crying in Genya’s defence lifts the heavy fog of neglect in the teacher’s heart.

               “You’re always telling Genya-kun to quit, and you look like you don’t even care when he looks hurt by your words! Why do you keep doing that to him? B-Because… Because he’s bad at the subject you’re teaching? Because he’s not as good as Maths as you? Sensei–“

               Sanemi knows what his constant discouragement is doing to Genya. As much as his heart clenches at the look of hurt on his little brother’s face, the older between the two has to do it for Genya’s sake. He’s doing it because he truly believes that the reason why Genya keeps on nearly flunking the subject is because the latter focuses his attention too much to his club activities. Sanemi is harsh because he genuinely wants for Genya to focus on his studies so he graduates with good grades. With good grades, Sanemi knows that the big universities in the city would send invites for his brother to enroll – and soon enough Genya’s future would be as bright as Sanemi has always dreamed of it to be. But to hear from [Name] herself that his little brother is trying hard to be good at Maths despite not being gifted like Sanemi…

               He knows that [Name] is always at the shooting range with Genya during the latter’s morning practices. He even sees the two hanging out with Genya’s friends in the library, the group patiently helping each other with subjects they find difficult.

               Sanemi smiles and softly places a hand on top of [Name]’s head, prompting her to stop crying.

               “You’re a good kid, you know that, [Name]?” he quietly tells her, gently stroking her [colour] hair. “Now I know why Genya’s so smitten with you.”

               The red on her face deepens, and [Name] hides it with her hands with an embarrassed squeal.

               “Sensei!”

--

               The day of the shooting competition finally comes, and Genya’s heart sinks when he doesn’t see [Name] among the audience.

               He knows that she also has an upcoming competition, and he’s even surprised to learn from her that his nii-chan becomes her temporary coach in the absence of Rengoku-sensei. Anxiety slowly creeps in his chest, dread weighing him down where he stands.

               What if… what if nii-chan has stopped her from coming to watch and made her practice today instead?

               A purple banner saying “KIMETSU ACADEMY’S UNBEATABLE ACE! GO GENYA!” pops out from the stands and Genya’s doubt leaves him as soon as they came when he spots his friends (aptly named the Kamaboko Squad because of Inosuke’s penchant of getting people’s names wrong) waving at him in support. Aside from the banner, they wield flaglets depicting his shotgun and his name. Smiling, he lifts a hand to wave at them but freezes when Inosuke puts the banner down to reveal–

               “N-No way…” Genya mutters in utter disbelief, eyes widening and filling with tears.

               Sitting side by side are [Name] and Sanemi, the former holding onto the latter’s arm and excitedly pointing to where Genya is. A huge smile splits [Name]’s face as she waves cheerfully at him. Sanemi, on the other hand, looks like he’s trying not to look too annoyed or bored with the proceedings. He faintly hears her shouts amidst the crowd’s din, his heart leaping up in his throat at her words.

               “GENYA-KUUUN! LOOK WHO I MANAGED TO DRAG HEEEEEERE! YOU BETTER SHOW SENSEI YOUR TOP-NOTCH SHOOTING SKIIIIIIILLS!”

               Genya is reduced to an embarrassed, blushing mess as he follows the other competitors in the first shooting location for the first event, all the while thinking of ways on how to express his gratitude to [Name] for managing to do the unthinkable.

--

               Skeet shooting, the last of the three clay shooting categories, comes to an end with Genya remaining at the top of the leaderboard.

               To say that Sanemi is astounded by his little brother’s shooting skills is an understatement.

               Judging from the categories of the shooting competition, Sanemi is quick to deduce that a competitor is required to have quick reflexes and flash judgement, not to mention a sharp eye, accuracy, and precision. The way his little brother handled all three categories with ease proves that Genya possesses such skills, and maybe even more.

               Despite his distance from the audience stands, Sanemi can perfectly see Genya’s posture and the way he holds himself. When holding a shotgun, Genya seems to transform into an entirely different person. He is so steady, not even a hint of trembling nor exhaustion evident regardless of how long he has been holding the shotgun up and constantly aiming at a clay target flying at approximately 30 seconds per meter. While there have been contestants who merely grazed their targets, the ones Genya shoots always end up shattering mid-air.

               His little brother doesn’t half-ass these competitions, doesn’t he?

               In his mind’s eye, Sanemi can clearly see Genya raking gold medals and trophies for Japan in international competitions.

               He trails behind Genya’s friends when they swarm his little brother right after the awarding ceremony. As expected, the younger Shinazugawa brother is sporting gold medals for each event. Sanemi blinks and looks down at [Name] when she tugs at his sleeve, her face glowing with pride as she gazes up at him.

               “Well, sensei?” she asks him, and Sanemi fights the urge to roll his eyes at the smugness in her voice. He settles for poking her cheek and shooting her a proud grin.

               “N-Nii-chan…?”

               The two look at Genya with varying degrees of pride on their faces. Sanemi places a hand on his brother’s shoulder, now openly showing the latter his brotherly love and support.

               “Well done, Genya,” he simply tells the younger Shinazugawa before resuming his task of poking [Name]’s cheek. “And tell this idiot that she can call me nii-chan outside of school from now on.”

               The (still not official!) couple’s faces explode into a brilliant shade of red at the blatant implication of Sanemi’s words.

               “NII-CHAN!”

               “SENSEI!”

.

.

.

.

[seerofmike]

i feel like a huge portion of kpop fans are gay fetishists attracted to the idea of quote unquote feminine men and thats why theres so much bullshit

YES okay. okay let me rant for a minute. let me preface this by saying i am NOT a kpop shipper at ALL. this is going to be long so i’ll put it under a’ ‘read more’ because i’ve been holding it in for TWO FUCKING YEARS BABY!

being mlm in boygroup kpop fandom is literally so exhausting. 99% of the people who ship real life human men from boygroups are fetishists and i will tell u why

obviously we all know of a ship in a fandom where the characters' personalities are twisted to fit the heteronormative view of "top" and "bottom" --one character is hypermasculine (top) and the other one is feminine (bottom). there are typical traits associated with both. the ‘top’ is scary or mean or angry or serious while the ‘bottom’ is emotional or bubbly or shy. while this is egregious, at least its fictional characters. their personalities can be simplified or exaggerated and it doesnt cause any real life harm.

im going to define what i think of as a fetishist: a non-mlm person who overly sexualizes gay men/men they think are gay/gay ships, and forces them into heteronormative roles for their own pleasure. its not even limited to cishet women. plenty of non-mlm lgbt people do this too and its like disheartening. so anyways

enter the kpop fandom

i may be incredibly biased here because one of the most affected members [of bts] is my favorite kpop boy, but oh god is the ‘personality change/simplification’ thing AWFUL here. i do not go out of my way to find fanart or see fanfic threads, but being in the bts fandom, u will inevitably see it and i REALLY wish i didnt

so anyways. my favorite boy ever is hoseok. he is sweet and hardworking and very passionate about dance and he can be serious when needed, but ultimately he tries to be very lighthearted and will consistently laugh or make jokes or do something funny when the other members feel uncomfortable or awkward (mostly during english-speaking interviews). he kisses the members on the cheek a lot/hugs them a lot/cuddles them a lot [this is important for later okay]

of course, theres a lot more to him because he is a multi-faceted real life human being, and i don’t know him personally, but that’s a general idea of what he’s like, okay?

SHIPPERS will have you think differently. some video got popular on youtube ""proving"" that hoseok is a sadist (which is just clips of him jokingly playfighting with the younger members), and the video depicts him as secretly mean and serious, and shippers will use that to say "hoseok is a total top!" and then most fanart or imagines or fanfic threads you see are top!hoseok, using this imagined 'hoseok is a sadistic dom' narrative to fuel their fiction, because SOMEONE has to be the top, so they twist him into this hypermasculine mean person (and probably feminize the 'bottom' of their ship but more on that later)

EXCEPT it is not just fiction. this narrative bleeds into REAL LIFE. you have new armys who dont know anything about the shipping scene, and yet somehow the narrative of hoseok being a secretly mean, sadistic person has already made its way into them. in real life, hoseok likes rainbows and wearing nail stickers and putting glitter in his hair. yet people in the fandom will say shit like "hoseok hates femininity" "hoseok would never wear [thing] because he's a dom"

sometimes on twitter you have ppl like me who say uh actually you guys are really weird and this is fetishy and in real life hoseok is very nice and not sadistic at all, you will UNDOUBTEDLY get comments like "omg hoseok isnt cute/nice when will yall learn he’s secretly like [x] and [x]". you could post a video of hoseok with a puppy titled "wow cute" and u will get like 2 clowns in ur comments going 'hoseok isnt CUTE hes a sadist’ . i wish i was joking but i am not. they will do this for EVERY action hoseok does. he cannot blink without people twisting it into a sexual thing

[also, side note: its funny that, since hoseok is one of the least popular members and therefore one of the least shipped members, he is often the odd man out among pairings, and is assigned 'the straight one' by default, and 9 times out of 10 people who assign him 'the straight one' do all this 'dom daddy hoseok' shit.

which just goes to show that this is indeed a matter of heteronormativity.]

so anyways arguably the most popular ship with hoseok is with yoongi, sope. this absolutely happens to other ships probably but im just using them as an example because i see it the most, being a hobi stan

yoongi is very calm and thoughtful and kind and sometimes appears to be cold/having a bad attitude but its just because of the way he speaks, which is very bluntly. again hes a multi faceted real human and i do not know him personally but thats generally what hes like.

god the fandom. treats him SO BAD. so horribly. he's shorter than hoseok. he's shorter than hoseok and people will exaggerate that literal 1 inch height difference so bad and people will turn his whole personality into shy and blushy and In Love With Hoseok, so in love with hoseok that ‘he gets sad’ when hoseok doesn’t kiss him/hug him/or whatever and IT BLEEDS INTO REAL LIFE.

ANY time hoseok or yoongi do ANYTHING together at ALL, people will ALWAYS push the narrative that hoseok, being the mean sadist he is, is 'hurting' yoongi for not returning his undying love or whatever. hoseok did a vlive where he made bracelets for all the members and he considered putting a cat charm on yoongi's but ultimately decided not to because he was having difficulty and oh my GOD sope stans twisted it into 'hoseok HATES yoongi, yoongi would have been so happy, he would have worn that all the time, hoseok isnt affectionate he hates being close with other people after all :(' which is LITERALLY not true because hoseok gives all his homies good night kisses but okay! whatever fits your narrative!

PEOPLE ACTUALLY HATE HOSEOK BECAUSE OF THIS. BECAUSE OF A SHIP. BECAUSE OF THE MANUFACTURED NARRATIVE PUSHED ONTO HIM BY FETISHISTS SO HE COULD FIT INTO THEIR HETERONORMATIVE ‘TOP’ ROLE. not to be all wahh wahh hoseok is one of the least popular members BUT THIS IS LITERALLY A CONTRIBUTING FACTOR.

everyone """headcanons""" hoseok to be a top so they will make him a MEAN HYPERMASCULINE person. everyone """headcanons""" yoongi as a bottom so they will make him a SOFT UWU HYPERFEMININE person. shippers are literally pigeonholing the two of them into fujoshi-esque roles for jack-off material.

anyways this all boils down to: gay fetishists will do anything, ANYTHING, to twist characters or real life fucking people to fit their heteronormative view of top and bottom. top=mean and masculine, bottom=soft and feminine. hoseok is a real life human being. yoongi is a real life human being. they both have real life human personalities, and yet shippers twist their personalities into the opposite to fit their narrative, to the point where nonshippers will genuinely view the two of them as something theyre not.

you have tons of armys that theorize that hoseok's happiness is just a mask he puts on to hide a cruel nature. on twitter. on youtube. in fanart and fanfiction. you have tons of armys that truly believe that, despite literally all the evidence, believe he hates being cute, he hates being happy, he hates the members, and hes secretly a dom daddy fuckboy who wants to bend yoongi over a table. hes a real life human being and fetishists doing their fetish thing has real life consequences.

the same is true for bottom!hoseok stans: they overexaggerate his more cutesy personality traits and he does have a 'feminine' figure i.e. he has a rly small waist but they will overexaggerate that as well and give him huge hips and its disgusting but dom!hoseok is far more frequent with far more devastating consequences so i used that as an example but they’re both bad.

people who """"headcanon"""" [like actually headcanon/firmly believe and not just joking or lighthearted] that members are gay will force these types of roles onto the members. if someone genuinely believes that like, yoongi is gay/bi/whatever, and then try to force this subby soft uwu persona onto him, they have no respect for gay people. they dont. gay people are simply objects for their fantasies. their view of gay people is so one-dimensional and so driven by fetishists’ ideas that its actually disheartening.

and god bitches will deadass be homophobic yet still ship real ass human idols. not just for bts specifically but all boygroup fandoms. sometimes when you search up an idol's name, [idol] gay will be trending--whether it be because of people saying "im gay for him" or whatever, and a LOT of cishet people will try 'clearing' the searches because being gay is bad or something. people normally ‘clear’ the searches if something like [idol fat] or [idol ugly] are trending, which im telling you so you know the context that people only clear the searches when bad things are happening.

[never forget that time 'jungkook gay' was trending and bitches were like "lets clear the searches!" but their pinned tweet said some shit like "sub jungkook x dom jimin coffee shop smut au thread 🌈". bitches also be like i cant be homophobic i ship taekook]

and hoseok and yoongi arent the only ones affected ! we could get into why namjoon and jin (another popular ship) are often assigned 'dad' and 'mom' respectively, or the fact that gay fetishists not only twist members' personalities to fit their ship narrative, but will also force tropes onto them i.e. taehyung/jungkook shippers who will literally demonize jimin and call him a slut or say that he's trying to 'get in the way of' of taekook or 'steal' taehyung/jungkook but thats a whole DIFFERENT rant baby! racism/asian fetishism is also definitely a present factor in all of this but this focus was primarily on gay fetishism and heteronormativity.

oh my god i could also get into the severe transphobia/trans fetishism in this fandom too but this post is already long enough as it is

tl dr: gay fetishists will fetishize real life people and it has actual real life effects and we should ban straight women from shipping mlm

[valzhangism]

this is a long, long ass post. but i need to get this off my chest.

dttwt. we all know it. they’re pretty crazy. and i hope they fucking see this, because i don’t have a public twitter acc, but oh how i would like to scream in their faces.

warning: this post is pretty pro-shipping, particularly pro-dreamnotfound. while i definitely do not encourage prying into personal lives, doxxing, shoving it in their faces, etc., i myself am a shipper. 

if you’re an anti insisting on being close-minded and putting hate in my asks/comments/mentions... don’t. don’t read this post. please remember to read the tags for tws.

so. not even an hour ago at the time i’m writing this twitter user @/simpgogy posted a tweet saying - and i quote this word for word verbatim: 

claim a dreamnotfound fic in the replies

which is... you know, already pretty shady. what the fuck does ‘claiming a fic’ mean? that’s not your work. is this some kind of dystopian alternate universe where we assign other people’s works to ourselves?

but i digress.

now people were claiming fics in the replies. and by claiming i mean stating the name, and generally kind of talking about it. some people claimed smut fics and had the general ‘ew’ replies. some people were actually claiming sfw fics and talking about how good they were.

which pissed me off to no end, of course. because what the fuck? that’s our work. that’s our hard work. they don’t just exist for you to gawk at. it’s like they don’t even acknowledge that there are people behind these screens, putting out effort and writing for free, for them. 

and this isn’t even mentioning dttwt’s treatments of shippers. which is fucking terrible, by the way, i’m not even going to sugarcoat it. i’m fine with teasing! i’m fine with being like “uh oh here come the shippers” under another one of dream’s weird tweets!

but genuinely dttwt pisses and shits on us every day like they’ve got a kink akin to the pissbaby himself. making fun of fics and aus. asking “who the fuck put dreamnotfound on my tl” like its some kind of curse or gore. acting like being a dnf shipper is like being a nazi.

don’t get me wrong here. i am absolutely fine if you’re uncomfortable with it. in fact, you’re valid as fuck! if you need to mute the tag or the word, go ahead. if you don’t like me personally, go ahead. you’re valid.

but even y’all have to understand that it feels shitty, right? when you make posts mocking us?? it’s so disheartening to see that you like these fics, you consume them, you’re like, “omg they’re so good!” and then turn back around and act like we’re kids to be pointed at and laughed at.

do you recognise that fic writing takes work? any kind. angst. fluff. and i don’t write smut, but i’m sure that takes effort too. where’s your energy with dnf artists? why is it fanfictions especially that make y’all want to laugh at us like we’re the circus? is it, perhaps, because of people’s misconception that writing somehow doesn’t take skill or talent or effort?

some people take weeks, days, months, writing fics. some people are genuinely passionate about them. a lot of the fandom is neurodivergent, and a lot of people hyperfixate. so has it ever occurred to you that making fun of a work that is a product of their love and effort... kind of shitty??

okay, so, i kind of got off-track here. to summarise: it’s okay if you’re uncomfortable with it, it’s fine to make fun of shippers here and there, but if you’re going to clown on us don’t consume our hard work. at least acknowledge that it takes effort.

this isn’t even discussing this reply which kind of implies that reading or shipping dnf is some kind of mental illness or condition. or at least some kind of depressing state. but it’s a joke and it didn’t really hurt me, personally, so whatever.

and this tweet pisses me off as well. like, you’re comparing dnf shippers to slur6d now? and i do recognise that she meant it as a joke, that there is a big fat /j slapped at the end, but it’s still kind of... weird to compare people having fun at dream and george’s consent to a man who said a literal slur and then defended himself endlessly? especially considering how, as i said before, lots of people are nd themselves?

it’s just weird. teasing dnf and their shippers? fine. clowning on them seriously, treating them like the plague, and then consuming our hard work afterward? not fine. i’m not trying to start drama here, just please... don’t do it.

bonus section -

whoa, what’s this? a bonus section? yep. and it won’t even be half as long as the one above, it’s just a short thing i need to vent about.

there’s this trend going around on twitter where popular mcyttwt artists make a bet that “if i reach ___ followers by this time i’ll draw dnf!!” most people end up losing.

which is, uh, pretty... weird? i don’t know, i don’t mind it on its own, i don’t get too heated up over it. but seeing artists drawing these arts, getting humongous amounts of clout and compliments, and to follow it up with “HAHA I LOST A BET I’M NOT A SHIPPER I WOULD NEVER DRAW DREAMNOTFOUND BECAUSE DREAMNOTFOUND IS FUCKING TERRIBLE AND HAHA SHIPPERS FUNNY”...well.

anyway lots of artists have openly admitted that it was for clout, which is good that they’re being honest, i guess. but anyway people draw “fake” dnf art and get sooo many compliments while i and a lot of other people work hard on writing fics and get clowned on. 

it’s weird, it’s rude. christ on a stick, be respectful, at least. stop putting backhanded insults for harmless people you claim to have no issue with.

i bet you, the reader, is getting real tired of me, so i’ll end this here. i hope you liked watching me rant about this (take a shot every time i say ‘uh’, ‘ugh’, or put an ellipsis lmao). 

to end this, here’s a tweet reply that made me want to smash my head through a glass window and die because of how rude and disheartening it is. cheers!

[valleydean]

What advice would a big blog such as yourself give to a relatively unknown fic author for getting their fics read by more people in the fandom? Are there any secrets you can share for things like tagging, posting times, etc?

well, first of all, thank you!! i don’t know if i’m really that big of a blog so you may be misguided lmao. i’ve just been on this website for like - a decade. so don’t let that confuse you lmaoo. but anyway!

the advice i’d really have to you is like..... just be super annoying. i will admit to you right here in front of god and everyone on tumblr dot com, the ONLY reason ANYONE has ever read any of my fics is because i wore them down. like, i am ANNOYING. i am constantly reblogging my own posts about my fics. i’m reblogging the same shit 5 times a day for 3 weeks straight and not even blinking. no shame in the game. make a graphic (for example) or a gifset (for example) for your fic! make 5! who gives a shit! and tag people - even if it’s just a couple friends at first (they won’t mind, don’t worry) and then put a note on the posts after your tag list telling people to let you know if they wanna be tagged. i mean, fuck, tag ME! i am giving you permission to tag me. (and then IM me about it because i’m old and i never check my @’s nor do i know how to check them lmao)

and for bigger fics, i’ll like - make a spotify playlist and post that on here. or i’ll make a tag on my blog for it and reblog like - aesthetic posts or quotes or stuff that have the same themes. and i’ll like - post screencaps of excerpts from my word docs to give as previews. i’ll just make random posts about my progress or lack thereof. i’ll just like..... never stop talking about it. hahah

but like - yeah, be annoying. do the Most(TM). hype your fic up SO MUCH that people will either be like “omg fine i’ll read it if you shut up” or “oh that looks dope i’ll check it out.” both reactions are VALID!

and this may be obvious if you’re not me, but i used to post every chapter of my fics at once. but then a little while ago i was like - i’m gonna post a chapter a week and see how it goes. and i like it a lot better. (i usually post one every sunday. it’s best to keep it the same day every week, i’ve found.) i feel like that generates more traffic. i also make a post like this for each chapter, so that may be why i’m getting more traffic. (again, back to my first point, be annoying.)

i usually tag those tumblr posts with: deancas, destiel, deancas fic, destiel fic, spn, supernatural, spn fic (and if there’s an edit involved, i’ll tag deancasedit and destieledit too). idk how many people are actually looking at those tags but.... it can’t hurt!

for smaller fics, i’ll usually just do a simple banner on the posts instead of a full edit banner - but i’ve noticed that fics with any sort of banner whatsoever usually tend to catch people’s eyes. so, i’d recommend doing that even if it’s just the title of the fic.

for one-offs, i’ll just do a header like on this one. i set that up with:

Title Pairing, word count Summary Link to AO3 if i posted it there too

but you can obviously set it up whatever way you want.

and yeah, i mean.... i don’t really know if there’s an exact science. i know it’s super discouraging right now because there’s a trend of people not reblogging things on here and just liking them, and putting kudos on ao3 but not commenting. and it’s really disheartening because it makes you want to stop altogether. but like, just because people aren’t interacting with your fic, doesn’t mean they aren’t reading it. there are a lot of silent readers out there. i wish they would speak up, but unfortunately they don’t.

i’m not sure if any of that is usable advice! but i hope it helped a little. but yeah, try not to get discouraged. keep at it. and like.... please do remember that, no matter what, you’re doing this for the love of it. you’re doing this for YOU. and i know you want to share that with as many people as you can. you should want to share it with people. but, at the end of the day, none of us are getting paid. so feel free to write as much or as little as you want. feel free to promote yourself as much or as little as you want. just keep at it and keep doing what you love and hopefully people will see your passion, and the rest will follow.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

another prompt saga

April 8th: Talk about friendship. How important are friends to you? Do you find it hard to make and maintain friendships? Are your friends generally supportive? Is there anything about having friends that confuses you?

another big question for me to go on plenty of tangents lol

well i haven't often had friends Really, there's like, being amicable with classmates, being friends with people While We're At School Together, being friendly acquaintances lmfao, or like, the occasional "yeah ig we're sort of friends, not exactly very close tho" lol and then rarely where yeah i'd call someone a close friend, although naturally, it's not like i completely discount those other, less close relationships. and, even more so, not like overall i'm like "oh friendship? yeah that's pretty frivolous and unimportant and it's just something mildly entertaining vs the Real Shit & True Emotional Support & Love of your biological family and romantic soulmate" lol, Friends Are Important and it's entirely serious 2 me

also natch i Do find it hard to make and maintain friendships lol. goes back to like, preschool and being around a bunch of age peers regularly for the first time, where my "best friend" defaulted to this one person who sought out interacting with me when i was otherwise doing my own thing during preschool recess, and i was pretty enthused about getting invited to a bday party one kid invited a bunch of us to, because that was like, a Friend thing, and a fun social thing, and i was included.....that i Do remember just feeling like, socially, everyone else was playing a game i didn't know the rules to and so couldn't expect to participate and, furthermore, i ought to stay out of the way of whatever everyone else was doing, where i Did often choose to do stuff by myself, but it's like, you know, the way "autistic" is even used figuratively (which. i have a lot of disdain for) because it's like oh the defining thing really is that telltale "doesn't want to interact with other people or form relationships, probably because also they have no feelings / normal and intrinsic qualities of Humanity" but it's like, if you pay any attention or god forbid ask autistic people about their own experiences, sure everyone has their own varying social approach and anyone might not always be raring to be the center of the party or Not want to do their own thing, but it's not that oh all autistic people aren't interested in social connection, but that like even when you are a small child it's like, oh all these other kids are interacting in this way that isn't really my social style and that shuts me out, and/or attempting to interact with people results in this even subtle, quiet rejection / exclusion that can be picked up on. i wasn't making friends and was often keeping to myself / keeping my head down as it were, but it wasn't because i didn't want to have friends or socialize. my mom was insistent i was a Shy Child lmao and i'd always argue that i wasn't Really, without further explanation though lmao, but it's like, again that i felt that sort of emergent exclusion, and there wasn't any space to interact much on my terms at all, and like, yeah i often stayed quiet / didn't want to mingle with other kids / if i was in a Situation i wanted to know the How To of navigating it / what to expect

being friends with people at school was fine, except the drawbacks of stuff like "we're only interacting at school, rarely hanging out outside of that" & "someone in the same grade is in a diff class in elementary school so we just never see each other now" & "for some reason that 2nd grade teacher made a whole giant Example out of me and a friend, god forbid, not paying attention or whatever the fuck, so now i feel like we can't interact at all anymore" & "changing schools entirely between elementary / middle / college" & "not being in school" lmao similar to work friends too, we're At Work, might not see each other outside of that, might change jobs & stop seeing each other, & still overall rare, b/c the Preschool Experience never Really stopped imo, had different versions of it even into college and like, being at jobs with other adults lmao, socializing is still Like That, came up with the Je Ne Hate Quoi where like, people kind of just Know to exclude you / consider you an exception to whatever other social stuff is going on.

and then like, the difficulties even when socializing / interactions Are happening, where like, it's always funny like. i'm very Verbose / Chatty and very opinionated but like, this will surprise people, that i Talk actually and have a ton of takes, b/c i was keeping to myself / not sharing that with them and so it's like well, that must of course be the realest version of me, no way i was filtering myself, i just must have Not Wanted to talk, and/or had nothing to say & hence no thoughts or feelings i might wanna share lol, of course....and tbh like, it sure Can be true that i don't wanna talk lmao like. i wanna talk About Stuff that isn't really "personal" generally, which can be like, yeah i wanna talk about this book, or about birds, or about this trivia topic, or whatever, whereas idk so much how to do like small talk about your day or otherwise share Casual things about Yourself, like, idk, being aware my interests are things about Myself but also aware that it's Weird / wasn't the kind of stuff you were supposed to talk about, and i felt that things about my life were otherwise Not The Right Stuff, or too boring (never hanging out, not doing much except being at home reading / doing shit by myself or w/siblings) or too Unfun (able to pick up the sense that At Home Shittiness was a private matter lol......) and it'd be like, idk what to say, things about myself don't seem to fit..........but also it can be that i do not enjoy the Vibe of an interaction lmfaoooo like, i truly do not want to talk to you people. like that i can sometimes vibe with someone inebriated people better lmfao because then, idk, they have some sense of humor and can muster some enthusiasm for anything, but also i'm not really a fan of knowing that someone isn't sober lmfao like. ppl will be like "omg were you drunk" like no, that was just my personality, whereas i am not Heartened to know other ppl Will have to have been drunk to get on my level, for example, don't understand when people cannot muster being even a little silly. it's goofaround hours. but then you have like, being around a bunch of cishet people when they're drunk, and their humor is as nonexistent and boring as ever but they're even louder / more insistent about it, nightmare. and, yknow, just people talking and i'm like "i'm not interested in this at all, whether re: conversational Style or Subject, i would not want to participate" and times when it's like. i know if i was gonna chime in with what i Would say you would not be able to handle me here lmfaoooo so. i truly would prefer examining the wall and thinking about my own shit or texting with someone i do like talking with

but that yknow, in groups / conversations i would be at least someone interested in, i can still be like, idk, Hesitant To Talk b/c of all the instances you've been taught like oh you're socializing Wrong and everyone hated that, sorta like the post about making a comment about salsa that brings the gc to a halt and you're wondering how you fucked up and if salsa killed someone's parents and forgot or whatever, i've been Disheartened re: hanging out when it's like, well, nice to be included, but i'm a friendship third wheel here, not being included in the entire convo and nobody misses it, there's been instances where it's like, two people talking, i chime in, i am completely ignored multiple times, this is frustrating lmao. or there's been times i've tried to put myself out there in a way, like yeah sure i'll hang out with this group, but also i'm anxious and it's like, if people are doing homework i'm also bringing this thing i'm working on as this parallel task, only to find out down the line like people then regarded you as a joke or something b/c it was Rude or Wrong when you know, actually that was you reading some weird shit that didn't exist into the situation, and just like, idk it's wild how people will have like "graciously" declined to express something to your face, and you either can pick up on shit at the time but not be able to say anything which just reads to people like "oh they didn't notice this / that means you can push it a little further next time even" or like, figure out later that something that seemed positive or decent actually ft. people not liking you / not wanting to include you Yet Again, and as a bonus you're left with you know, having to always worry about if people Seemingly being amicable & accepting is actually them wishing you weren't there or solidifying some Interpretations of you that they're then gonna Talk About or Act On behind the scenes, like, beautiful thank you, always very touching, so glad you were so Considerate of someone's feelings and Nice about this where it just ends up being this whole letdown / feeling like even more of a rejection if there was this weird like stringing along lmao like. can allistic people be normal for five minutes

anyways and tied to that sort of, it's also like, simultaneously Cagey About Things and always worried about like, i could tell this person this thing and maybe it'd be Incorrect for the interaction and they won't care, whether because it's too mundane and boring a thing about you or because it's too #Real, i think i glimpsed something a month or so ago about like "do other autistic people have trouble where like, you can be friends with someone a long time but not get particular Close to them" or whatever lol, where like, well i have to hold everyone at arm's length and often Then Some because there's just matter of fact stuff about me that i nonetheless think i can't or shouldn't share, if i talked about something it might be out of the blue b/c i just was hardly confiding in people about it, or it's boring, or it's like, i don't actually feel like i'm close enough with this person that saying this isn't gonna be like "whoa overshare!! i just feel awkward & weird!" lmfao like. there were people i hung out with in person the year i lived out of my car and i did not mention this at all to them / kept it a secret b/c it's like, not out of like ohh this is a secret b/c No One Can Know, some people Could know lmao (shoutout to the person i Did confide in about these problems and who talked with me at what must've been like 3am in that timezone when i was like "well the rich people around here made sure to get cops to harass an unhoused person, e.g. me, would you believe it, it sucked" lmfao) it's that i knew idk, it would be pointless, they'd just feel weird about it and switch into that "for some reason, this is being Nice" where everyone will go into full Putting On A Front mode to be Polite like, that really sucks actually lmao could you Not. but it's like, idk, all this stuff where it's like "this thing about me / my life would be too Boring or too Awkward or Depressing or Etc Etc" turns out to be isolating / alienating b/c like, of course it would be. and idk nobody i ever made friends with in person i was Confiding in, not a ton of them re: me either, because you know. being cagey and wary, on top of like ohhh this person is Standoffish if they're hesitant to interact with people generally or do their own thing or i don't think they're socializing Right / have incorrectly inferred their feelings/motivations/intentions or whatever

and furthermore on that lmao it's also like, again, while i'm Verbose & Opinionated people will think i'm quiet & have no takes to provide because it's also like, even when it comes to stuff i sure feel i Could talk freely about, it's like, if i have a different opinion here will that just be a conversational Interruption ruining things for the real participants, probably nobody wants to hear me talk about this Subject, probably nobody wants to / would let me talk about it at much length without interrupting, even Online lmao i can be just going all out in terms of [how much i can talk about something] and while people can be Into that at that time it's like, people aren't into that beyond that one back and forth on one day, shoutout when people do enjoy the extensive discussing and/or have patience for it other times lol.

then supposing i Am talking to people lmao it's like, idk i'm an acquired taste or what have you, like, on top of the Talking A Ton it's like, the being opinionated and argumentative and sometimes pedantic or whatever on top of being irritable, could stand to be a bit more patient lmao, The Hater Friend to use the figure of speech lmao i have hardly been in a Group to be The [Any] Friend lol, also if my sense of humor doesn't fit it's like well how am i supposed to be silly, if being sometimes Enthused doesn't fit, again kinda an issue......have described myself as A Bit Much, humorously, but already not doing that as Much b/c it's like, i think i'm still too much like considering other people's opinions too "objective" here when like, first of all that's never accurate lmao, second of all i can easily forget that idk, i can at least in theory expect people to just regularly Like me and Enjoy interacting with me lol so. an acquired taste few can sample..........like hey even if other people don't vibe with me, it can just as much be the case that i'm not vibing with other people, don't worry lmao. and yknow, kinda parallel to Masking to seem acceptable in any casual social situation it's like, if i feel i'm suppressing my whole personality here / putting up a front / like i have to Get Through what should be a friendly interaction rather than be able to enjoy it myself, it's not exactly that rewarding. and plenty of times it's like, i like to be around people, but it can be strangers, i don't feel like "oh i wanna go out to eat / see a movie / go to this event, but if i can't get any friends to go, guess i can't!" like get out of the way i'm readily doing shit alone, it can even feel Better that way if otherwise it's like, now this occasion is about performing peak Agreeability for this other person/people, and like, not like i have ever been like "yes i have people i can readily ask to hang out and they'll be like Ya" anyways lol so. used to operating solo, where you can't be like "aha this is because this person has no Human Interest in Human Connection" when it's like. well it was never all up to me was it

well and so also it helped when i was 14 and able to be Online consistently, vs at home lmao. time for online friendship, which i don't think is like, oh that's not Real, like what sorry have you never known about people who have Remote friendships before, phones & letters & telegrams and also [nowadays when many ppl are Remote even if they usually lived near enough to hang out with] where it's like, you have this different format for socializing that can sure play out differently than Real Time, In Person interactions, and ever since i'll be posting mostly to myself lmfao but able to thusly talk about Interests and like, people will come along who want to talk more about it, then we do. i suppose also it can sure help that i'll draw (and Only draw, lol) for said interests, although tbh i think most of the time it's the extensive text posts that do it? really and great litmus test or whatever lmfao like, well already this person must not hate the verbosity. and then you can end up vibing with these people further, or not, but it's like, again, there's this chance for From The Start like, oh this person Likes that i have this niche interest, they like &/or don't mind talking A Lot about it lmao, vs in person introductions where that can sure happen but it's like, that's gonna be chance & spontaneous, whereas ppl might have the opportunity to Seek Out this interaction / content of yours......even online though, i'm still like, not as inclined to reach out or make the first interaction move or whatever lmao so. and then it's like, people make galaxy brain remarks like "ohh people who are very Online don't have friends, irl, they aren't Personable, irl," like yes congratulations i'm autistic and i don't have many In Person friends generally, sometimes maybe not any, don't really know where people think they'll land their argument here. like, follow it through, are you just calling people losers. is it "social media makes peopel Not social" like nobody is Doing Anything when they're online or everyone is embracing strangers and having heart to hearts every weekday morning with whoever is nearby if only they weren't on twitter? plus the fact that like, if i don't have access to people i interact with online, that doesn't like, force me to become neurotypical so that i then have a thriving in person social circle, it just means i'm more isolated? meanwhile, turns out it helps a lot if it's like, yeah i can Expect to interact with people

and then still like, all the time it might be like i still can feel Confused as it were about How To Talk To People lmfao like. there's not much "Just Be Yourself" when being yourself has meant filtering yourself, actually, and being v self conscious about trying (and often failing) to appeal to other people (which, then if you do succeed, it's like oops this person likes me but if i've been putting up a front the whole time, not super Validating) and not exactly a ton of practice getting to do Otherwise, and it can again be like. is this too boring to talk about, or just somewhat arbitrarily like "oh i'd better Not talk / say whatever" for no real reason lmfao, i Can just get like. Real Time Chatty as it were, but it's difficult actually lmfao like i need a lot of momentum, and it's easy for that to be Not the case.......and just like, again that it's easy to forget you don't have to be in "nobody wants to hear you talk" mode, or think like, okay, i can't just say anything, i have to say something Good, aka of interest or funny or whatever lmao but then it's like well i guess i Can just say anything. don't much know how to do that tho

(also, sidenote from "wtf is thinking being friends w/someone online is faker than when you're friends with someone sort of from being in the same building every weekday, what is the conclusion of 'what a loser geek whatever if you care about connecting Online who can't be popular Offline'" where it's always funny when someone is also like "wow even in person Fandom is, like social media, something that only people who suck at socializing Normally are into" lmfao like. not very relevant b/c nobody wants to really be in a broader fanbase rather than find particular kindred spirits through it, and who actually wants to go to comic con or whatever, sounds like a nightmare, but it's still such a faux analytical perspective lmfao like, again, first of all, what's the Conclusion to your argument here? and secondly honestly like. all versions of Small Talk are kinda gonna be bullshit, even amongst say, nt people, there's nothing Universal, and people can certainly be inconsiderate / preclude any genuine connection via what they might consider to be this neutral part of the ritual, and yknow, i find it kinda exhausting like it's peak Time To Mask and then i'm hardly in the mood to Really talk further, like yknow what. idk i'd be annoyed if someone demanded i Correctly Complete some sort of fandom reference by way of greeting, but i'm also annoyed when someone demands i Correctly Complete whatever maneuvers you're supposed to do with a rhetorical "how are you :)" lmfao like. you're a cringe nerd in the rigid social ritual of pleasantries fandom)

anyways and uhh yeah i also yknow, hashtag alana beck, it's like, glad to pretend Friendly Acquaintances makes sense, i guess it can, but it's great when it's like, oh i Don't have to only expect to be really peripheral in people's lives, or to only be friends with people i don't feel like i vibe with That much or also talk to that much about anything, when i can definitely feel like Yes this person is a Friend, no "are they actually closer to an acquaintance at this point" disclaimers needed, again, taking it back to the fact that friendship sure is Significant to me and when i have it that's v important thanks

so it's like uhhhh yeah difficult to make friends, don't have general appeal or whatever lol, ppl aren't on my wavelength or i'm not on theirs, hard to talk to people even though it's not because i don't/can't talk plenty lmfao.......and re: being Supportive it's like well, i don't really tell people In Person i'm autistic but naturally if you follow me Online here i am talking about it lol, and not like anyone who already knew me & was friends with me was like "oh nvm don't like interacting with you now" and i also gotta mention the like Handshake Lgbtq lifehack, where plenty of times it can be like, oh if we vibe on That wavelength it can be easier to befriend people, and/or that people will at least be more like, amicable / supportive based on Knowing you're handshake on that lol. b/c really it's like, i'd also like to just be allowed to talk and/or simply be around people even if we are not Personal Friends, aka that you can expect to be treated decently with some basic respect / consideration and like you're generally allowed to exist and be present and interact with people where you're not only guaranteed to Not be punished / excluded for it if someone's your individual friend and allows you to be here, so. once again it's like, can allistic ppl be normal for 5 min