#one of the reasons was probably Obi-wan never telling him

[bayonettassecondgf]

Ngl I would too survive burning on the shore of Mustafar just like Anakin did because imagine your brother/father figure tells you he loved you after he cuts off your hands and legs and lefts you to burn.

Man, I would be mad asf too. Like king couldn't have you told me that earlier, like we could have avoided all this...

[maidenvault]

During my last rewatch of the prequels I was actually shocked by how much I've misremembered or decontextualized certain moments in my mind because of how they're often talked about in fandom as showing the Jedi as too arrogant, too bureaucratic, generally just burying their heads in the sand while everything goes bad etc. So I'm gonna try to address every individual scene that typically gets brought up to argue that this is an actual theme in Lucas's portrayal of the Order.

The Council doesn't take Qui-Gon's account of meeting a Sith seriously.

Mace and Ki Adi Mundi do both express doubt this guy could be a Sith. (Understandably! Historically they've never known Sith to be able to hide their existence, and for them to have survived totally in secret for a thousand years is a pretty wild thing for Qui-Gon to be so sure of.)

BUT Yoda admits that the dark side is hard to see, and Mace assures Qui-Gon they'll do everything to find out the identity of the attacker. Later he's ordered to go back to Naboo and try to draw out Maul to discover more. Qui-Gon accepts this and doesn't ask for backup. Why should he? He held his own against Maul before, and Maul's probably not gonna show himself again to face a ton of Jedi. They end up missing the chance to learn who trained Maul because of how things go down, but Qui-Gon's death isn't the result of the Council mishandling the situation.

At the funeral, Yoda says the presence of one Sith means there's another out there. They know they've got to be on guard now and will be, but they've got no more leads for now.

2. Qui-Gon's not here to free slaves.

There's this idea that slavery existing on Tatooine shows the Order is apparently too tied up doing shady things for self-interested politicians (footage not found) to help the people who really need it. But Padme's shocked to know the Skywalkers are slaves for a reason. The truth is there isn't a lot of slavery in the galaxy at this time because the Jedi have helped keep it that way for centuries only by working with the Republic. In TCW we see that Zygerrian slavers have a particular hatred of Jedi because they're literally The Anti Slavery People and did so much of the work to crack down on their trade. But Tatooine is controlled by the Hutts and they simply don't have the resources to start a war with them.

(And honestly, it's crazy how people talk like Qui-Gon's a monster for honestly and apologetically telling Anakin no, that's not why he's here. This is a child he's already indebted to and who has a hero-worshipping idea of Jedi, it would be fucked up for him not to be clear about how he can't help him and his mom.)

3. They doubt Dooku could be behind the assassination attempt.

This I understand shows the Jedi to be a little naive. But they knew Dooku as a good man, and at this point he and his followers are still putting on a show of wanting to secede for idealistic reasons (and a few of them, manipulated by Dooku, actually do have good intentions). Only later do the Jedi learn they're illegally building an army before they've even officially left the Republic and clearly have no interest in the peaceful resolution Padme's been advocating for. And they only find this out because they have Obi-Wan investigate the assassin and this very quickly leads him to Dooku.

4. "Arrogance, yes. A trait more and more common among Jedi. Even the older, more experienced ones."

In context, this line from Yoda is clearly not meant to be taken so seriously. Obi-Wan says he fears Anakin is too arrogant, and this is Yoda's light-hearted way of telling him not to be so hard on him. Part of training a Padawan is learning to trust them so they can grow, and Obi-Wan perhaps needs the reminder that he isn't done learning himself.

Of course Yoda saying this could be partly motivated by them having been caught off guard before by the existence of Darth Maul and the dark side clouding their awareness, as we're told repeatedly throughout the PT they know is a problem. But it's kind of contradictory to take this as confirmation that this is a serious fatal flaw of theirs. If someone acknowledges their own arrogance then they're aware of their ability to be wrong, which means they can't actually be that arrogant. If truly meant in a general sense and not just as a gentle reproof of Obi-Wan, it's a pretty self-deprecating comment coming from Yoda.

5. "If an item does not appear in our records, it does not exist."

Chief Librarian Jocasta Nu gives this haughty response to Obi-Wan looking for Kamino, a system that's not in the Jedi Archives. So being so overly confident in the infallible knowledge of the Jedi, he takes her word for it and totally drops this lead.

Except no, he goes to someone older and wiser to figure out what this actually means. And he and Yoda are forced to conclude that the unthinkable - a trusted person among them somehow had reason to erase information from the archive - must nonetheless be what happened. This is honestly an exception that proves the rule: Kamino, and we can assume only Kamino, is missing from the archive only because it was removed, which is so suspicious it just shows he must be on the right track to discovering something. Jocasta is kind of snooty about it but theirs obviously is supposed to be one of the most accurate and complete databases in the galaxy.

6. Obi-Wan doesn't believe what Dooku tells him about the Senate.

For one thing, in this conversation Dooku's lying about basically everything but this. And I can't ever stress enough that Palpatine is a threat unlike anything the Jedi have ever dealt with before, who's already taken control of so much before they even know they're fighting anything, so the idea that a Sith is controlling the Senate would be really hard for anyone to believe.

Still, we know Obi-Wan reports this to the Council anyway. But it's a vague statement and they still don't have any information to act on. Palpatine soon has them very busy putting out fires in the war, and naturally fighting the Separatists who are led by Sith seems the best way for them to get to the bottom of what exactly is going on with the dark side. And they do finally turn their attention to how power-hungry Palpatine is getting once the war is nearly over and they've got the bandwidth for it, and think about what they might have to do if he's the threat to their democracy they fear, but of course he's too many steps ahead of them all the time.

---

So basically, what we see the Jedi being so guilty of in these examples are thought crimes. When confronted with the crazy explanation that happens to be true, their instinctive reaction is "No, I don't think that's possible." And then they do their due diligence to uncover as much of the truth as they can anyway. And Yoda, the Grand Master of them all, is often the first to admit that their first assumptions could be wrong. But Palpatine wouldn't be a good villain if his moves were predictable and he couldn't get an advantage over the good guys - that's just how storytelling works sometimes and it's not that deep.

It honestly felt stupid typing so much of this out because it's 90% just describing what actually happens in these scenes. But I guess it's a lot to ask that people actually carefully watch the films they discuss. 😒

[saphronethaleph]

Literary Illusions

“It’s ironic,” Palpatine said, shaking his head. “He could save others from death, but not himself.”

Anakin frowned.

“And this is something the Jedi wouldn’t have told me?” he asked.

“Of course not,” Palpatine replied. “Is it a story you’ve heard?”

“Well, yes,” Anakin said. “Just now, from you. But not before then… and that surprises me, Chancellor.”

Palpatine shrugged. “I think you’ll find, Anakin, that the Jedi have not been telling you everything.”

“Maybe not, but… honestly, that sounds like exactly the kind of thing they’d tell me,” Anakin said.

Palpatine frowned.

“...what?” he asked.

“You know,” Anakin said. “Some Sith Lord works out how to bring people back to life from the dead, but his apprentice kills him and doesn’t bring him back to life because the Sith are inherently self destructive. If the two of them had worked together and been able to trust one another, they’d have been immortal.”

He shrugged. “It’s a good illustration of the inherently self destructive nature of the Dark Side, and it’s the dichotomy of how the Dark Side leads you to seek power in order to achieve goals that you then discard as irrelevant, because they’re not directly related to gaining power… hold on a second.”

Palpatine was a little distracted by trying to avoid mentally kicking himself, so it took him somewhat more than a second to notice what Anakin was doing.

“...Anakin?” he said. “Are you getting your comlink out?”

“Yeah,” Anakin replied. “Going to text Obi-Wan, ask him what he thinks of the story. Maybe there’s some kind of detail I missed which makes it less of a good illustration of the different worldviews and mindsets of the Jedi and the Sith.”

The Knight shrugged, his thumbs tapping away at his comlink. “He probably knows it, he knows all of the old stories.”

Palpatine blinked several times.

“...don’t,” he said, then very discreetly scrambled for a reason why. “It’s the middle of a performance. We don’t want to interrupt them.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s on silent,” Anakin replied, with a shrug. “Or vibrate. Did I put it on vibrate… hang on, Chancellor, I’ll make sure it’s on silent…”

He turned the comlink over, then a loud bwing sounded.

“Oh, right, I forgot to set it to do not disturb mode,” Anakin said. “Hang on… uh… yeah, there we go, I forgot I added all these custom modes. I’ve been missing a lot of sleep lately.”

“Perhaps-” Palpatine began, but Anakin spoke over him.

“Huh,” he said. “He says he’s never heard of it either. Wants to know where I heard about it, it looks like he’s really interested… or maybe he’s trying to tell me about a death stick vendor, he’s terrible with multiglyphs and he thinks he’s good at them.”

Anakin glanced at the Chancellor, hoping for some solidarity, then visibly noticed that the Chancellor was several decades older than him and abandoned that.

“Is there a book I can get the whole story from?” he asked, instead. “Obi-Wan is better at nuances, like I say.”

“That is not the point,” Palpatine said, trying not to get visibly angry. “The point is that there is a way to save your loved ones!”

“Maybe there used to be, but not any more,” Anakin shrugged. “Like you said, this was a Sith thing and the Sith are all dead. Well, unless General Grievous is a Sith who knows how to heal people, but I doubt it given how much he got hurt, and I’m not sure Dooku knew it either… hey, if this story needs to be publicized more then maybe we could have them do a play of that instead?”

Palpatine blinked several times, as he tried to keep up with a Jedi with possible undiagnosed ADHD and found himself discovering a lack of talent for podracing.

“What?” he asked.

“You know, a play,” Anakin explained. “Dramatic betrayals, lost loved ones, it would probably do numbers. It’d be better than this, anyway.”

He waved his hand at the ongoing performance of Squid Lake.

“...what is wrong with Squid Lake?” Palpatine said, before reflecting that that had really been a stupid question for him to ask and that he should have asked a much better one.

“Well, uh,” Anakin began, looking a bit abashed. “Actually now I say it out loud this might be really culturally insensitive of me, but to me this play might as well be eighty minutes of people boasting about having enough water to swim in.”

“It’s a ballet,” Palpatine told him, now completely having lost control of the conversation.

“It’s just a less scary version of Sarlacc Pit,” Anakin went on. “Someone tried to drown me in a lake once, because they thought I couldn’t swim, but floating on sand is much harder, you barely have to do anything to escape a lake. You just float.”

Very belatedly, Anakin caught sight of Palpatine’s look of total befuddlement, and shrugged.

“Watto was a lot of things,” he said. “But he had culture.”

Palpatine’s hands twitched, as he very seriously considered the idea of abandoning literal centuries of Sith planning and decades of personal political advancement in favour of stabbing Anakin somewhere it would hurt.

It was extraordinarily tempting.

“...hold on,” Anakin said, slowly. “I guess… the thing I’d like most at the moment is for… and that means… this is literally one of those times when I could fall to the Dark Side because of it, like Darth Plagueis.”

He bestowed a grateful smile on Palpatine. “Thanks, Chancellor! I need to make a call, I guess the ballet won’t mind.”

Palpatine was so thrown by the swerve that he couldn’t think of a way to stop Anakin in the few seconds he had.

“Love?” Anakin said, into his commlink. “I… think we need to come clean, because otherwise I’ll fall to the Dark Side.”

Palpatine’s eye twitched.

[adragonsfriend]

Use this one trick to instantly fix all childhood trauma (Jedi Masters don’t want you to know this)!!!!!

That is what every “if Obi-Wan had just— *adds one extra scene to canon* —then Anakin would’ve had perfect mental health and never listened to Palpatine at all,” sounds like to me. Look I am not an expert on any kind of psychology at all let alone early childhood development but,

It is possible to do your very best to help or raise someone and still have bad or imperfect outcomes, especially when you have someone actively, secretly working against you (cough cough Sith Lord of the month cough), (for many reasons, but in this case particularly), because unravelling the mindset built in early childhood is hard, actually.

Coming at this from the “raised in a safe and loving environment” side of things, it took me years to figure out and internalize that my friends whose parents weren’t as great as mine were functioning in an entirely different landscape when it came to their interactions with adults.

Many years ago when I was in middle school a friend (acquaintance? idk I think most people thought I was annoying) told me that her ankle kept giving out and causing her pain. I asked if she'd told her parents so she could rest or go to the doctor. She told me she had, but her mother either hadn't listened or refused to help. My (approximate) responses?

"So it's not actually that bad then?"

"You should tell her again."

"Are you sure you explained it right?"

The only explanation I could comprehend at the time was that there must have been some unclear communication about the situation or its severity--if her mother had understood she was in pain, she couldn't possibly have just not done anything about it? Adults are responsible, caring, etcetera! They wouldn't do that?!

With more experience, I've come to understand better, and learned to respond in kinder, more helpful ways, but the shift in mindset was not and is not intuitive.

And I had the luxury of figuring all that out whilst being safe myself. Coming from the other direction, being in danger and trying to figure out why other people act like the world is safe? I can't say for sure, but I imagine it’s a lot more complicated.

Point with regard to Star Wars being, it really is harder for Anakin, coming in later, to acclimate to the Jedi ways and thought processes than it is for his peers who grew up in the safe environment of the Temple. And whatever arguments people want to have about how much psychology and therapy exist in the Star Wars universe, or how much “Jedi just do cognitive behavioral therapy” (not totally inaccurate, but reductive on several levels), no matter what the answers to those questions, it will still be harder for Anakin.

There is a reason the council changes its mind on training him only after he is suddenly famous and the Sith are proven to be back. When Anakin was not in significant danger of being snatched up by someone else, it was genuinely probably the easier and safer option—for him and everyone else—for him to live a different life.

The Jedi are not necessarily fully prepared for a child with Anakin's history, and, there is nothing bad about living an ordinary life. Anakin would not have been somehow unforgivably robbed by living life as a mechanic or an engineer or something, rather than being a Jedi.

Anakin is a victim of many things in his life—Sidious, Watto, Gardulla, Tatooine’s everything, his own conscious choices—but he is not a victim of malice, incompetence, or idiocy by the Jedi just because they couldn't—in only a decade or so—help him fully and perfectly unravel the mindset he developed in his early childhood. If there was any lack of qualification on their part, it was one they were aware of—but which was outweighed by the danger of little Anakin getting kidnapped out of normal-kid elementary school.

Being brought up in and around slavery absolutely made him more vulnerable to Sidous and became the basis of their dynamic as master and apprentice. Acting like the trauma that affects his mindset and actions for his entire life can be obliterated just by making minimal changes to the plot is wild to me.

And don’t get me wrong, fics and headcanons can do whatever they want, not everyone wants or is trying to write a deep psychological character study (also fanfic and even fiction in general cannot and should not be held to any standard of realism if it's not serving the story and the author)—simple fix-it’s (my love) are fun and an excellent short-cut to other things like happiness and fluff (my other loves)—but don’t act serious about the idea that adding one conversation about his feelings or one extra explanation about Jedi philosophy would automatically lead to Anakin having perfect mental health outcomes and always making good decisions.

Disclaimer (if the ones throughout weren't enough) : please go forth and do whatever you want. the moral of this post is actually just that (1) you won’t convince me, (2) I wanted to talk about this, (3) the clickbait title was too funny not to post, (4) i literally can't open my mouth without phrasing things like i'm in the middle of a heated debate, and (5) i continue to not be an expert in early childhood development—my evidence is very literally anecdotal

[fanfic-obsessed]

Failing to Thrive then Thriving in failure

I just had the funniest notion. Time travel comedy, but the twist is that Palpatine is the one to go back in time. 

So we start just after Kenobi, Palpatine has been emperor for about a decade, he succeeded. The Sith plan is complete, he has everything he had dreamed of and worked toward for a decade…and he is so bored. He never realized that 90% of his joy actually came from pretending to be a benevolent Chancellor and the intrigue of fooling people.  Now he has shown his true colors and could not go back to pretending (it simply would not work). Being the Sith in charge is not as fun as he thought it would be. Even getting to openly torture people has lost its appeal after 10 years.

It’s ok for Vader. For one Vader was never interested in those intrigues in the first place. For two 45% of Vader brain is taken up by trying to resurrect Padme Amidala, 50% is taken up by Obi Wan Kenobi (Palpatine is not sure if Vader wants to kill Kenobi, Kriff Kenobi, make Kenobi tuck Vader in every night and tell him is it going to be alright, Force Kenobi to help Vader resurrected Padme, or make sure Kenobi is eating, taking care of himself, and has a good enough blanket), leaving only 5% for everything else.  

Frankly if this is what Kenobi had to deal with before the war, Palpatine is somewhat impressed he got anything done.

Vader isn’t bored. Palpatine’s assorted lesser minions are not bored, they are living the dream of being as bigoted as their little fascist hearts desire. But Palpatine just could not find joy any longer. 

I do want it clear. Palpatine is not repentant. He does not regret the deaths that he caused, the genocide, the enslavement, any of it. He’s just bored. 

One day Palpatine finds a book, or maybe an artifact, or possibly a scrap of paper with an archaic formula. The title roughly translates to ‘Sith Master Time Travel’ (Listen The Son was also very bored, and being outside of Space Time meant He wanted to see what would happen). Palpatine is able to time travel, but only as far back as when he became a Sith Master. It was also a one time deal, he would not be able to use the method again AND it would destroy his origin timeline (not that that actually factored into Palpatine’s decision at all).  Not to mention he would essentially be possessing and killing his previous, alternate timeline self. 

Of course Palpatine time travels. He goes all the way back to the moment he became the Sith Master (it turns out the Sith titles are not just titles), looking at the still warm corpse of Hugo Damask, just as the Naboo crisis is wrapping up. 

Now Palpatine had already decided to do some things differently.  At first he was still working outward the Grand Sith Plan, if trying to keep his ‘Kindly Politician’ mask a bit longer, however he has decided that instead of Vader (or possibly in addition to Vader, if things get boring again) he will get Obi Wan Kenobi as his apprentice, figuring that there must have been a reason that every Sith Apprentice for 20 years ends up obsessed with the man (also because he thinks it would be funny to corrupt the Jedi’s ‘Guiding Light’). Dooku and all the pieces needed to start the Clone wars are already mostly in place. It is just a matter of maintaining until the clones are the right age.  So he does what he needs to to maintain the Empire building plans and decides to focus on corrupting Obi Wan. 

He fails, utterly. He fails so fully that Obi Wan did not even notice his attempts at corruption. Like he knew it would take time to corrupt a Jedi, he had done before after all, but he still expected at least a little change within the first year. There was nothing. 

And it was not a case of Obi Wan not trusting Palpatine. This is still a decade before the war. Obi Wan is a grieving, freshly knighted,  trying to keep up with a nine year old with somewhat unique trauma. Palpatine knows how to get Obi Wan to feel comfortable and trust him (Palpatine probably knows too well how to get Obi wan to feel comfortable and trust him, between Dooku and Vader). Obi Wan is just, for a given value, incorruptible. 

Now Palpatine’s obsession switch has been flipped. He went into it thinking that corrupting Obi Wan would be a fun side project, a way to pass the time.  He was wrong.  He knows from the previous timeline that torture would not be effective (Listen if the torture mask specifically built to corrupt lightsiders did not make a dent after a month it is pretty well proven that torture will not cause Kenobi to fall, Palpatine knows this) nor would killing Kenobi’s loved work (again, if it didn’t last time we have some pretty concrete proof). 

So now we have Palpatine trying every method he can think of to seduce Kenobi the darkside, always just shy of admitting to being a Sith or being creepy. To the point that he has actually forgotten the Empire building he was doing. He kind of even forgets to be Sidious.  He almost ghosts Dooku, before he remembers that Dooku is Kenobi’s grandfather(that is not the correct term, Dooku tries to correct Palpatine an even dozen times before giving up) and gets Dooku involved in the corruption that is STILL. GOING. NOWHERE.

Dooku basically becomes Grandpa Dooku to both Obi Wan and Anakin, and falls back into the Light while trying unsuccessfully to corrupt Obi Wan to the Dark. Due to darkside vow complications (also because I think it would be really funny) Dooku is not able to say, imply, or otherwise do anything to make the Jedi suspicious that Palaptine is a Sith. Also, to a certain extent he thinks that as long as Palpatine is focused on corrupting his incorruptible grandson, the other Sith is not thinking about galactic domination (To be fair he is correct).  

Palpatine spends most of his time trying to corrupt Obi Wan, while keeping up the act used to maintain Obi Wan’s trust. The thing is Palpatine is fully aware that Anakin in the original timeline was about observant as a particularly dense brick wall and would not have realized that the persona of ‘My friend Palaptine’ did not match the reality of ‘My pal Friendpatine’. Obi Wan would realize if his act was not consistent. 

So Palpatine decided to keep the act up 24/7.  And everyone knows that your actions become your habits become your personality. 

Somewhere in year 8 Palpatine forgets how to Sith. 

Technically he is still a darksider but not the extra layer of fucked up that comes from being an actual Sith. And he still has not even made a dent in Obi Wan’s light. He has also, almost single handedly, derailed the war that had been brewing and fixed about 40% of the corruption in the Senate.  All without killing a single senator.

Palpatine spends most of his time very confused. 

Palpatine lets his term as Chancellor end, having gone down in history as one of the most beloved Chancellors in history.  The Clones are found and mostly are inducted as an arm of the Jedi Order. Jango Fett is given a metric ton of therapy, which helps him see that the Jedi were not actually at fault for Galidraan (Jango had, in fact, been the person to escalate things to violence) before he is allowed to take Boba back into the galaxy. By that point the Clones want little to do with him. 

For the rest of his life Palpatine tries, unsuccessfully, to corrupt Obi Wan (who never noticed). At this point he is genuinely friends with a number of Jedi (He and Mace Windu have a surprising amount in common, including a love of the theater and a mild exasperation for Anakin Skywalker's antics). He is an honored guest at both the CodyWan and the Anidala Weddings (including a Jedi based wedding ceremony).

Honestly he is having the most fun of his life. 

He is also never caught as a darksider. He never figures out how that is possible either.

[antianakin]

I think I'm able to perhaps put a few words to why I really dislike that the Ahsoka show had her choose to come to the conclusion that Anakin was GOOD, that he was a good person and good teacher to her, rather than having her refuse to forgive him and just having to let go of him entirely.

Ahsoka is a character who has been, for her ENTIRE RUN on Star Wars, defined by Anakin and her relationship to him. She's never been able to escape that. She was created as an explanation for why Anakin "matured" over the three year gap between AOTC and ROTS, but her lack of existence in the films means she can have no greater impact on Anakin than that. She is wholly irrelevant to his character but she does not EXIST without him. In Rebels, she is only in one season where all of her appearances are fixated on her discovery of Anakin's betrayal and how that impacts her, leading up to their final confrontation where she appears to die fighting him. She comes back only so her relationship with Anakin can be used to help Ezra let go of Kanan. In TOTJ, she has an entire episode dedicated to explaining that the only reason she survived Order 66 was because of some kind of special training Anakin gave her that made her stronger, better, faster than any other Jedi. In The Mandalorian, her appearance was full of subtext about her trauma regarding Anakin and the way she reacts to other Jedi as a result of that. In The Book of Boba Fett appearance, that subtext is still there, primarily in her conversation with Luke where she even tells him how much he reminds her of Anakin. Which leaves us with the Ahsoka show itself and how it REVOLVES around that relationship, from Sabine being turned into Anakin 2.0 to everything in episode 5 to Ahsoka claiming she'll support Sabine in everything because this is what Anakin did for her to Anakin literally showing up in ghost form to Thrawn predicting everything Ahsoka will do because he has some familiarity with Anakin.

Ahsoka CANNOT escape this relationship, she cannot move out from this particular shadow and become her own person because her character seems to ONLY EXIST to be "Anakin's student." She can almost literally not stand on her own at this point. If her story doesn't revolve around Anakin in some way, it doesn't seem to really exist (please keep in mind here that I am mostly looking at HIGH CANON appearances for this because that's what I am familiar with; I'm sure that some comics have probably managed to move away from her relationship to Anakin a little bit sometimes but I haven't read any of them so they're not being counted in this analysis, especially since I don't think they're really impacting her higher canon characterization anyway).

It's even just visible in how other characters perceive her. She is constantly being COMPARED to Anakin, we keep hearing how like Anakin she is. The only time I can think of that she is compared to anyone OTHER than Anakin is when Trace and Rafa tell her that she acts like a Jedi even if she isn't currently calling herself one (bless their SOULS for this moment, they deserved so much better than the hate they got and one single appearance on fucking TBB). We never hear anyone say she reminds them of Obi-Wan, or Yoda, or Plo Koon. It's ALWAYS Anakin even though she's known Yoda and Plo Koon longer and she seems to spend almost as much time with Obi-Wan as she does Anakin.

By having Ahsoka decide to deal with her feelings about Anakin by just... setting aside all the bad shit he did and focusing ONLY on the good moments that he had and letting that define him, it makes it nearly impossible to separate her from him. If he's good, then it's a GOOD thing to compare her to him. If he's good, then his influence on her HAS to have been a good one. For me, it ruins ANY nuance that could have come from going the opposite direction and recognizing that while he had some good moments, he was in fact an overall bad person who was a terrible teacher to her. He betrayed her, he tried to kill her (and only failed because she was saved by someone else), he abandoned her. I don't care WHAT he did before this, this automatically makes him a BAD TEACHER.

And recognizing that Anakin was a bad teacher would force Ahsoka to look at HERSELF more critically, too, to recognize the places where she has made the same mistakes perhaps, where she's started leading herself down a similar path to his, and then choosing to NOT BE LIKE HIM. Anakin should be (like he is with Luke) the personification of her own darkness. Palpatine represented Anakin's greatest demons and personifications, Anakin can represent something similar for Ahsoka. He is an indisputable part of her now, but she doesn't HAVE to become him, she doesn't have to let that CONTROL her. And by making that choice, she frees herself from being defined by him for the rest of her life.

But now, the narrative has bound Ahsoka to Anakin forever. She'll never be anything more than Anakin's student because this has become what defines her as a person and a character. And it just... it sucks. Ahsoka deserved better than that.

[221bshrlocked]

Keep Your Religion

Pairing: Commander Wolffe x Jedi AFAB!Reader

Words: 7630

Warnings: 18+ only. Starts off angsty then gets to the smut. Softer than usual Wolffe because that man would be madly in love when he finds his special someone. Lots of Kissing. Possessive Behavior/Words. Dirty/Sweet Talk..but mostly Sweet. Exhibitionism Kink if you like squint! Oral Sex (female receiving). Penetrative, Unprotected Sex (wrap the shlong before you king kong my dudes). Slight Breeding Kink. Wolffe is insatiable yall!

Summary: You try to end things with Wolffe because you fear your relationship will end badly due to the rules set in place for the Jedi and the Clones. Wolffe convinces you otherwise.

A/N: Can you believe I finished another fic? Neither can I. It was about time for another Wolffe fic so here you go my lovely humans. I hope you enjoy. Comments are always always always appreciated so let me know how I'm doing please and thank you. I do apologize that I'm not tagging, it hasn't been working for some reason since post editor changed permanently to this new looking editor. I'll try to figure it out I swear! P.S. this is the second of hopefully many more submissions for @clonexreaderbingo

Something about seeing him so relaxed and loose tugged at the strings of your heart. It was a rare sight, one you thought he would only grace you with when the two of you are alone together. But here he was, throwing back whatever shit drink the bar offered him and his brothers, all the while smiling at Cody’s remark about the new shinies embarrassing themselves in front of Anakin and Obi-Wan. You’re nursing your own drink in the corner, trying to find the best possible way to approach the booth without making a scene. He’d told you before that almost everyone close to him knew of your relationship, but you felt weird about dropping the pretenses. You were his boss, after all. Well, not completely his boss, but a commanding officer regardless. If you started acting extra friendly, you’re not sure how the rest of the Wolfpack would take it. 

As you swirl the spotchka around, you suddenly feel like someone is watching you, hunting you even. There’s only one man who’s ever made you feel so heated and just as you look up from the glass in your hand towards the group of Clones you were previously studying, you notice Wolffe staring you down, the slightest hint of a smirk flashing at you in an attempt to get you to react to his attention. 

Normally, you’d enjoy the subtle flirtatious expressions, even tease him a little to get a rise out of him before escaping to the nearest room to lure him for a private moment. Or, as private a moment as 79’s can offer a Jedi Master and a Commander of the Grand Republic Army. 

But tonight was different. Tonight, you came out to the Clone bar to decide the best way to end things with Wolffe. It was the last thing you wanted to do, but you didn’t want to push your luck any further. Things were getting worse by the hour, and you couldn’t afford losing Wolffe all because some assholes in the Senate didn’t think he deserved to love or to be loved by someone. Then there was the matter of the Jedi Council, and how strict they were becoming. It was already frowned upon before the war, and it only took a few months into this galactic conflict for them to push their ideologies even harder on everyone at the Temple. 

You would never forgive yourself if they punished him simply because you couldn’t stand being far away from him any longer. You narrow your eyes at Wolffe and down the rest of your drink, disappointed in yourself for not having the guts to tell him earlier. 

And for knowing that you probably wouldn’t be able to do it tonight. 

The smile on his face drops instantly when he notices you avoiding his gaze, and you curse yourself for ruining his night. It was going so well, and one look at you made the worry return to his mind again. 

Clutching your robes tightly, you pay the bartender quickly before excusing yourself and heading towards the bathrooms in the back. You could feel the tears threaten to spill down your cheeks and the last thing you wished for is for someone to see you and make a huge fuss about it. As you push through the crowd, you feel those same pair of eyes hold you down harshly, as if they were refusing you permission to leave without confronting them. 

Quickly wiping your eyes, you push open the doors and turn around to lock them behind you, only to nearly bump into the chest of the man you were hoping to avoid tonight. You gulp nervously, and before you can say anything, Wolffe tilts his head to the side and studies you closely, his eyes roaming down your body to see if anything needs his immediate attention. 

When he finds nothing out of the ordinary, he takes a step closer to you and shuts the door behind him, not bothering to lock it as he continues to back you up until you hit the wall. 

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’re trying to avoid me.” His gaze is direct, unfaltering in the haze of lust he was sending you under. You furrow your eyebrows and try to look anywhere else but him, but as always, he doesn’t give you the easy way out. Grabbing the bottom of your chin, he turns you until you have no choice but to look straight into his eyes and respond. 

“What if I was?” You’re not sure what pushes you to say something so defensive, but the chuckle it gets out of him makes you realize you had already lost whatever game he was playing with you. 

“I’d say you should have gone to another bar.” He’s right. You know this, and he definitely knows this too. The ease with which he continues to have an effect on you would normally be welcomed, but you’re pissed at him. Pissed for being so weak for him. For not bothering to put up a fight. 

“But here you are…at the one place you knew I was coming to tonight.” Wolffe leans down and nudges your temple with his nose, breathing in the scent of your sweat and perfume, and forcing you to reach for him so you don’t topple over from the sheer amount of control he has on you. 

“So tell me mesh’la, what have I done to deserve the cold shoulder?” He whispers the question in your ear, slowly sliding his hands down your body until they reach your waist. You’re having a difficult time breathing, and you moan his name as you throw your head back when he squeezes your hips and pushes his chest impossibly closer into your own. 

“I- you didn’t…it,” you can’t form a coherent sentence, let alone a sensical thought, when you’re so overwhelmed by his presence alone. You thought he would laugh at you, but when his breathing becomes nearly as erratic as your own, you understand that he was genuinely trying to figure out if he’s done something wrong. His methods seldom changed, and you weren’t surprised that he was trying to get you to talk by touching you as intimately as possible without tearing your clothes off. 

“Don’t tell me I did nothing wrong…sir. Something must have happened, or else you would be begging me to have my way with you right now. So what is it? What have I done?” Wolffe repeats again, making you feel guilty for your behavior and for what you’ve been thinking of doing since the last time you were together. You remind yourself that he deserves someone better, someone who wouldn’t compromise his position in the GAR all because of their messed-up religion. He deserved so much more than you. 

And the mere mention of your rank made it worse.

“W-Wolffe, I umm, I can’t do this anymore.” You know this was the last thing he expected you to say because in the blink of an eye, he’s removing himself from you completely and putting space between your shaking body and his own wound up chest. When you muster up the courage to look into his eyes, a shiver courses down your spine. 

It has been so long since he’s given you such a look, one that was filled with nothing but suspicion and guardedness. He’s quiet for longer than you like, and when you reach for him in an attempt to console him, his frown deepens and he twitches away from you. You hadn’t expected such a reaction to hurt this much, but it does, and like before, you have no control over the stream of tears rolling down your chin. Again, it’s not what he expects to witness from you, certainly not after what you just declared to him, and when you sniffle to get yourself under control, he closes the space between you more aggressively than before, slamming his hands on both sides of your face and clenching his jaws tightly when he sees you pouting at him. 

“I don’t know what I’ve done, I don’t. But I’m sorry regardless. I am so very sorry. Whatever it is, we can talk it out. It’s not worth throwing away all that we have. Please. Just- krifff…tell me what it is I have done, and I will get down on my knees right now and beg for your forgiveness. But don’t do this, don’t give up on us.” In all your time knowing Wolffe, you’ve never once heard him speak with such a tone. He was always assertive, confident and unwavering in his commanding presence. 

But the only thing you could feel now is his fear. 

“You did nothing wrong, it’s me…it’s all me Wolffe.” You know this won’t be enough for him, but you try to convince him regardless. Then he drops his head against your shoulder and you know you won’t be able to hold out much longer. 

“I wasn’t born yesterday sweetheart. If you’ve ever held an ounce of respect for me, you’ll tell me what I did wrong. You owe me that much. I- I deserve to know.” If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was close to breaking down as well. 

“I do Wolffe, I respect you…more than anyone. You have to know that.” You hope he doesn’t turn away when you reach for him again, and as you cup his cheeks in the palms of your hands to raise his attention to you, you’re met with an expression you never thought you’d see on his features. 

“You haven’t done anything baby, it’s me. It’s…all me.” If you were a better person, you would have been consistent in your tone with him, but seeing him so torn down broke you, and you couldn’t not soothe him the way you always did whenever he comes back from a particularly difficult mission. 

“You deserve someone better Wolffe, someone who would never compromise your safety. Being with me is- it’s getting dangerous. The Council is becoming more strict…the Senate even worse. If they court martial you because you’re with me, I- I don’t know what I would do.” There’s something so gut-wrenching about the way he refuses to look away from your moving lips, and when you stop talking, he doesn’t blink once, his cybernetic eye focusing in and out before slowly blinking along with the other.

“Someone better?” It’s clear that he’s still hurt by the word vomit you threw at him, but whereas his voice showed it earlier, the shakiness and reluctance is gone now, replaced with a menacing, almost angry tone that you were too familiar with, one that you’ve witnessed during battle when his orders weren’t obeyed immediately. 

“I can’t give you what you want Wolffe, not without hurting you eventually…unintentionally. My- my religion, it’s becoming a threat to your well-being. It’s not worth the hassle. I am not worth the hassle. You could do so much better than-” Whatever you’re about to say gets lost in the damp air of the room as soon as Wolffe decides he’s heard enough of what was on your mind. He grips your neck tightly, winding his other arm around your back and violently pulling you into his embrace as he swallows your surprised shrieks. Your frown deepens for another moment before you surrender yourself to the possessive kiss, and Wolffe must feel you melting into his arms because he growls against your lips and claims your tongue without remorse. 

His hold on you only grows stronger when he feels your arms move to wrap around his neck, and when he’s sure you’re trying to get closer to him and not push him away, he tilts his head to the side and deepens the kiss, not caring for how messy or aggressive he’s being with you as he shoves his tongue past your lips and reminds you of what you could be missing if you got what you wanted and left him. 

As the need for air becomes difficult to ignore, Wolffe breaks the kiss and gives the two of you a moment of respite. When he opens his eyes and finds your orbs glistening with unshed tears, he swears beneath his breath and lunges for you again, the hand around your throat loosening for a fraction of a second before tightening around your jugular and forcing you to accept his rejection of your wishes. You moan into the kiss, allowing him to take whatever he wants from you, knowing that he wasn’t going to allow you to go through with whatever it is you thought you could get away with tonight. When he’s content with the reactions of your mind and body to his touch, 

“You nearly broke my heart, ner runi. Don’t ever say that to me again!” Wolffe refuses to let go of you, afraid you’d leave the room thinking that he agreed to the sentiment you dropped on him a second ago. When you say nothing in return, he shakes his head and crushes you into his arms, nuzzling into your neck and breathing you in to attempt and calm his nerves. He prays that you give him some form of an answer that confirms your understanding of what he just said, but when you don’t, Wolffe sighs heavily and pulls back enough to take a better look at you. 

“Wolffe, we need to talk ab-” Again, he doesn’t care for what you have to say and cuts you off, letting you know that this was definitely the end of the conversation. 

“No, we’re done talking. You can keep your religion sweetheart, I couldn’t care less for its consequences…but don’t you fucking dare and ask me to abandon mine.” His voice is firm, the familiar unyielding articulation confirming to you that he’s already made up his mind on the matter. There would be no more on the matter. 

As much as you hate to admit it, it feels like a bantha has lifted one of its feet off your chest. You look into his eyes and find them filled with a more familiar emotion, one that kept you going ever since you confessed your feelings to him. You thought it would be difficult to get him to accept your proposition, but you realize then and there that it was definitely harder for you to come to terms with your initial thoughts. 

You slowly smile at him, and it must be what Wolffe needs to hear to forget the last few minutes because his touches become less crazed and more soothing, a level of intimacy you’re always yearning for when the two of you are away from each other for too long. 

“And what...what is your religion?” You barely find the attention span to ask, the familiarity of his touch and his voice sending you down a spiral of lust-filled thoughts that only increased the longer Wolffe remained in your presence. 

“Your body is my religion cyar’ika, and I’m not planning on losing my faith any time soon.” The confession is lewd, mostly because he’s using your weakness to drive the message home. But as dirty as the admission sounded on his lips, you couldn’t help but sink into his embrace, wanting to hear more of him so you could forget about why you were here in the first place. 

“Is that s-so?” You’re practically shaking in his arms, and Wolffe uses your momentary distraction to tug your robes apart and leave a trail of kisses down your neck to where he wanted to bite you most. 

“Yeah,” he licks at your skin, wishing with all his heart he could have you right then and there. It’s not as if the two of you haven’t fucked at 79’s before. He just knew that you both needed something more, something that he can only accomplish in the privacy of his rooms. 

“Here’s what’s going to happen. I’m going to excuse myself for the night, tell the boys I have to finish reports for the General.” He slips a hand underneath the edge of your shirt, drawing circles on your waist until you slowly begin to roll your hips into him. 

“Ahuh,” you’re not really paying attention to what he’s saying, your body already frozen with anticipation now that it felt his hands and his tongue leaving marks across it again. 

“Focus,” he squeezes your ass, shaking it twice to get you to open your eyes and look past the haze to obey his next commands. 

“Yes sir.” You bite into your lip and giggle when he narrows his eyes at you and mumbles something about punishing you for being a tease. 

“You’re going to leave shortly after, something about being needed back at the Temple.” Your stomach twists in knots when you realize he’s using his ‘Commander’ voice on you, and you can’t help but wrap your arms around his neck and mold your lips with his own when you remember the last time he used that same tone on you. 

What a night it was. 

“And where w-will I actually be going?” You ask as soon as Wolffe pulls you away and breaks the kiss. 

“My room baby, where you’ll stay for the rest of the night.” He says matter of factly, as if you shouldn’t even be asking his such a question. 

“Pray tell, Commander. What will we be doing that- oh kriff, that will require me to spend the night in your quarters?” You throw your head back when his hand slithers up your body and cups your breast through your Jedi robes. You can almost feel the heat radiating off the palm of his hand, and the harder he gropes you through your clothes, the more you wish he would just push you down on all fours and fuck you into oblivion. 

“Well, I don’t know about you sweetheart, but I’ll be practicing my faith...and worshiping every inch of your body until the only thing you can feel is me.” The smirk on his face would be menacing if you weren’t so used to it by now, and you gasp lightly when he leans down and bites the skin of your shoulder peeking from beneath your cloak. 

“Oh gods-”

“That’s it, moan for me cyar’ika. I want the whole fucking bar to know who makes you feel good.” Wolffe shoves your thighs apart and pushes his leg in between, slowly moving you back and forth on him to give you a preview of what’s to come tonight. 

“Wolffe, please. I need you.” You fall forward against his chest, whining for him as he continues to move you across his thigh and dares you to come from such a simple touch. 

“Oh, now you need me?” You know he’s joking without looking at him, but the question throws you off guard and you snap your gaze up to see if he was hurt by what you said previously. 

“I- I didn’t…I’m sorry.”

“None of that.” Wolffe shakes his head, not wanting to ruin the moment by something so trivial. He slows down his touches but keeps you moving on him, hoping to distract you long enough to make this night a little better for the both of you. 

“Wolffe,” you call for him again, not in warning but in desperation, hoping that he can see how sorry you are for ever doubting what the two of you had. 

“That was cruel of me, forgive me sweetheart.” His voice is soft, so much sweeter than before, and you’re reminded by how quickly his mood changes whenever he senses you’re upset or angry. 

“How could you ask that when I am the one who hurt you?” You should drop it, everything that he’s done is proof that you should let this go and get back to more important matters, but you can’t stop yourself from asking him, wanting to know why he’s always so patient and caring with you when he was the one who deserved better. 

“You didn’t hurt me, cyare.”

“I did, I- I almost…”

“You could never hurt me, little one. Never.” Like before, he doesn’t care for whatever you have to say, not because he doesn’t value your words, but because he knows how difficult your relationship with him probably weighs on your mind. 

Even from the beginning. 

You study him for what feels like hours but is probably only seconds. And you wonder how anyone could ever think him cruel and rude when he was so loving and unbelievably long-suffering. Without warning, you throw yourself at him, mirroring his actions from before and shoving your mouth against his own to feel grounded. He doesn’t waste a second, pushing you harder against the wall and sucking on your tongue until you were a moaning mess in his embrace. 

“F-fuck, if you keep that up, I won’t- kriff, I won’t hold back.” Wolffe rests his forehead against yours, trying to keep himself in check so he doesn’t end up embarrassing the two of you by what his body is willing to do. 

“Then don’t!”

“You want me to fuck you right here, where anyone can walk in and see you getting filled with my cock?” He shouldn’t be surprised by how wanton you are, and although he knows he should step away and put some space between you and him, he can’t help but retort with his own teasing comment. 

“Please Commander.” You lean up and kiss his jugular, nipping at the skin just above his armor and soothing it with another kiss before laying your head back and meeting his intense gaze. 

“Always playing dirty. Just for that, you’ll have to wait.” Wolffe clears his throat and eyes you up and down before taking a few steps back. He barely manages to hold back from laughing when you stumble forward and nearly lose your footing. You’re about to complain when he raises a hand and silences you, furrowing his eyebrows at you in an attempt to look intimidating. 

“Another word, and I won’t give you my cock tonight.” He warns calmly, smirking immediately when you shake your head and tell him you’ll be good.

“No please, I’ll stop. I’ll behave, I swear.” 

“You’ll behave-?” The question trails until the room is silent again and you know instantly what you said wrong. 

“Commander.” You whisper to him as you try to fix your clothes and hair so you don’t look like you were fucked against a wall by the Commander of the 104th Battalion. You don’t dare smile at him, afraid he’d misunderstand the gesture for another one of your teasing expressions and completely throw the night away. 

“Good girl, now do as you’re told and I promise to reward you.” He watches you saunter past him and before you unlock the door, he smacks your ass quite harshly, watching you closely to see if you were going to behave or retort like you usually do. 

“Yes, sir.” You don’t dare give into his tricks, hoping to get through the next hour or so without getting distracted, or worse…caught. 

“Off you go.” He gestures for you to leave before him, and when you’re no longer in sight, he shuts his eyes and sighs in relief. Wolffe is not sure how the two of you got to where you are now, but considering the fact that he expected something like this to happen since you got together, he’s relieved that it was for reasons different from what his mind conjured up all those nights he spent alone in his bed. 

You walk out and move towards the bar again, your eyes roaming across the busy bar and waiting until Wolffe walks out before you make sure that no one noticed the two of you together. He follows you soon after, finding you almost instantly and winking at you before he heads towards his men. You watch as he tells Sinker to give him his helmet, and you assume they all roll their eyes not a second later because he told them he needed to get some paperwork done. 

But as soon as Cody looks at you, he knows what Wolffe is planning on doing, and before you can turn away from him, he raises his glass and smiles at you before downing the rest of his drink. You should be embarrassed at being seen, but something about the way the Commander gestures at you makes you smile, as if he was telling you that he hoped the two of you are okay. You shake your head at him and throw your hood up, walking to the Commander of the 21st Nova Corps to let him know you’ll be leaving earlier tonight. 

“Ah General, I was wondering when you’ll be joining us.” You smile at Commander Bacara and the boys, giving them a few credits to let them know the next two rounds were on you. 

“Sorry Bacara, I’m calling it early tonight. Needed back at the Temple!” You feel bad for lying to him, but as always, he doesn’t ask for an elaboration, telling you that he hopes you don’t have to do too much paperwork while you’re still on break. 

“See you later,” you nod at him and the others when they salute you, and just as you walk out of the bar, you vaguely hear them yell for the droid making its rounds to get them a round of quanya. 

“Hmm, didn’t peg them for the type.” You mutter to yourself as you step out into the chilly Coruscant air, looking around to see if Wolffe was anywhere to be seen or if he has already left. When you don’t sense his Force signature nearby, you make your way towards the speeder bike Anakin lent you and bring it to life, trying your best to contain yourself so you wouldn’t be caught by another Jedi nearby. 

You make your way through the streets as quickly as possible, and when you make it to the Temple, you park the bike nearby and think of the best way to make it through the barracks without being seen by any of the Masters…or Commanders. 

It’s not the first time you entered the barracks, and under normal circumstances, it wouldn’t be strange to see a Jedi making their way through the hallways. But it was nearly midnight, and you weren’t sure you could lie your way through a question if you were caught before you made it to Wolffe’s quarters. You’re about to reach out to the Force to see if anyone is awake when you hear footsteps approaching you from behind. The familiarity of its warmness sets your mind at ease, and you take a deep breath before you turn to face him. 

“Commander.”

“General, is there something I can help you with?” He’s putting on a show for the surveillance cameras, and you clear your throat before you tell him something about wanting to review the plans for the next mission. 

“Very well,” he’s curt in his response, and you get the sense that he may be avoidant because he has about as much control around you as you do whenever you so much as hear the mention of his name. 

“Thank you, Commander Wolffe.” He nearly falters in his steps at hearing you call his name, and he swears beneath his breath as a way of warning. You nearly smile at his reaction, but you remember how closely the guards watch the cameras and you choose to switch your attention to the ground. Not another word passes between the two of you, and as you reach his room, you feel your heart threaten to leap out of your chest at the prospect of finally spending a night with him. 

Up until now, the two of you had to make do with stolen moments and short breaks, whether on missions or back here. Neither of you have ever spent the night alone, and you find it fitting that tonight would be it. It’s comforting and nerve-wrecking all at once, and as soon as you step into his quarters, you allow yourself to take in the calm before the storm. 

Before the door slides completely shut, Wolffe is on you like a moth to a flame, nearly ripping your clothes off of your body as he pushes you down onto his bed. 

“W-Wolffe, I-” You try to ask him why he’s so frantic and crazed all of a sudden but he lets go of you and stands to his height, making quick work of his armor in record time all the while keeping you still with the mere look in his eyes. 

“I can’t do slow tonight, can’t wait another fucking second without having you.” You always admired how much care he puts into his armor whenever he’s taking it off or putting it back on, so seeing him drop each pass to the ground sends a zap of lightning down your spine. 

You mirror his actions without another word, throwing your boots and socks away before struggling to take your pants off. Moments later, you feel the bed dip once Wolffe crawls towards you, his muscles flexing in such a menacing way that makes you fall back into the sheets and wait for him to tell you what to do next. 

But then he says nothing, and you’re torn between asking him what he needs from you and letting you do whatever the fuck he wants. He reaches for the edge of your pants and tugs them right down your legs, not once blinking as he violently takes your sweater off and throws it somewhere behind him. You’re left in nothing but your undergarments, and as you twist your arms to take your bra off, Wolffe shoves your thighs apart and makes space for himself in between. 

“I need you, now.” His voice should terrify you, it should be enough of a warning for what he has in store for you. But you find it exhilarating, knowing that only you could get him to lose this much control. You try to reach for him, wanting to feel his skin beneath the tips of your fingers, but Wolffe shakes his head and grabs both of your wrists in one hand, slamming them above your head and tightening the hold he has on them while he slithers his other hand down your nude body. 

“If it were up to me mesh’la, I’d tie you to this fucking bed and have my way with you whenever I want. I’d- kriff, I’d fill you with my cum every minute of every fucking day…so everyone would know you’re mine…so they know that I’m yours.” He teases you through your panties, rubbing lazy circles across the damp spot quickly becoming larger. 

“Wolffe, please…take me.” You whine his name in desperation, hoping he’d finally give you his cock and end your misery. 

“I swear to the maker sweet girl, I’m going to fuck you all night long…kiss every inch of you, mark you with my teeth and hands until you’re my very own altar. I’m going to worship you baby, but only if you promise me one thing.” Wolffe slips his fingers beneath the flimsy material of your panties, rubbing at your clit furiously to get you to focus on him and him only. 

“A-anything…anything Commander.” You turn to the side and kiss his forearm, hoping he’d see how willing you are to do whatever he asks of you. 

“Pray for me.” As you look bite into his skin, Wolffe pushes his hard dick into your cunt, not bothering to give you a moment to get used to being so full before he starts fucking into you with sharp thrusts. You’re screaming his name instantly, arching your back from the sheer amount of pain and pleasure he was bringing upon you so quickly. 

“FUck, there we go…such a good fucking girl for me, screaming my name so sweetly. Go on ner Jetii’ika, tell everyone who fucks you like the perfect cockdumb whore you are.” He leans down and bites the top of your breasts, letting go of your wrists for a brief second so he can rip the last bit of clothing shielding you from his hungry eyes. 

“Wolffe…f-ffuck, oh gods…Wolffe!” You twist your fingers into his bed sheets, crossing your legs behind his back and whining for him when he descends down on you and sucks on your nipple. His hand seeks out your own, and when he intertwines his fingers with yours, he grunts and growls against your skin, reaching for the other breast and groping you harshly until the only thing you can feel is his tongue, and his hands, and his cock wreaking havoc on you. 

Wolffe knows he should slow down, perhaps be a little less demanding with you. But something about seeing you in his bed when everyone else is asleep makes him more possessive, more needy with your body. And it didn’t help how you were reacting to his advances, how completely you surrendered your body to him without so much as a question. He opens his eyes and roams them over your already bruising skin, and when he finds you wanting for more, he increases his pace and fucks you until you couldn’t even breathe out his name. 

You sense his gaze on you, and as you look through heavy-lidded eyes, you find him completely focused on your dazed expression. 

“Wolffe, I- I love you.” You’re not sure what makes you say those words now, but a voice in your heart told you this was the right moment. You’ve spoken before about what this thing between the two of you was, and you knew, as well as he, that this would be it. There would be no one else, not for him, and definitely not for you. 

But you’ve never actually said those words out loud. You’ve said it in the way you kissed him, in the way you gave yourself to him…and Wolffe had pretty much conveyed them to you with every stolen glance and every quick touch he managed to sneak when the two of you passed each other on the General’s ship. 

Like before, Wolffe hasn’t expected to hear you part with such a confession, now of all times. He falters in his pace for a brief moment before he sinks his cock into you and stills completely, wanting to be as close and connected with you as possible when he finally said what he’s felt for you since you introduced yourself to him. 

“Ni kar’tayli gar darasuum…cyare.” You let out a quiet sob at the intimacy of the moment, and Wolffe wraps his arms around your neck and your waist to feel you against every bit of his skin. His thrusts are shallow, barely leaving you empty out of fear of losing this moment. You throw your arms around his neck and bring him flush against you, crying for him one last time as he seals your lips with his own and sinks into your wet cunt. 

The world comes to a halt around you, and all you can feel is Wolffe’s lips claiming your mouth just as he fills you with his seed. You come with him, shaking softly in his arms as his hot cum shoots into you and coats your walls with proof of his need to mark every fucking inch of you. It’s too much and not enough, and you push your heels into his ass in an attempt to bring him even closer to you. It’s not possible, you know that, but you want nothing more than to have him sink into your body until you weren’t sure where he ended and you began. 

Wolffe is fighting for his life, torn between giving you a second to breathe and quite literally stealing your breath to fill his lungs with your essence. He parts for a brief moment and looks at you, kissing your eyes softly before shoving his lips against yours again. You don’t dare ask him to give you a moment of respite, mostly because you’re sure you would miss him if he were to put space between your skin and his lips. 

Suddenly, the world turns around and you break the kiss unintentionally, gasping in surprise when he turns the two of you around until he’s laying on his back and you on top of him. You smile against his jaw when you feel his hands slide down your back and grab at your ass. As he starts moving your hips back and forth, you nuzzle into his neck and breathe in his scent, licking and kissing his skin the more he fucks his cum deep into your cunt. 

“W-Wolffe…”

“I’m not done with you yet, ner kar’ta.” The promise is both teasing and terrifying, but you can’t find it in yourself to hesitate, not when he was promising you the stars all night long. 

And he does, he brings you the heavens until you can no longer breathe without tasting the cosmos on your tongue. With every touch of his fingers, you beg him for more…more of his sweet words, more of his sinful kisses, more of his needy cock.

He fucks you until you lose your voice, and when he’s sure he’s rung your body of every ounce of pleasure it can offer him, he fucks you some more, filling your pussy until you were nothing but a mess, a mixture of his seed and your juices.

And then he pushes you down and parts your thighs to pull you apart with his tongue, and you feel that familiar heat rise in your chest all over again. You tug on his hair, torn between urging him to make you cum again and pleading for him to stop because you could no longer stand the pleasure. You were so sensitive, and Wolffe knew very well how painful the ecstasy was becoming, but some twisted part of him wanted to mark your cunt with his teeth and tongue as well. He wanted to devour you, body and soul. Your release comes in the form of a silent cry, and Wolffe laps up your mixed cum until you can’t take it anymore, softly pushing his shoulders away so he can slow down.

There is a lazy smile on your features, one that deepens further when you see Wolffe crawling on top of you and leaving a trail of wet kisses across your sweaty skin.

“Satisfied?” He dares to ask, lightly pinching your nipples when you don’t respond right away. You giggle at the touch, pulling him closer to you so he can kiss you some more. He melts into your body, roaming his hands across the tired muscles until he has no choice but to fall beside you.

You hum in response, studying his relaxed expression and laying the softest of kisses on his forehead before pulling him into your neck. Neither of you say anything, and only when your breathing steadies does Wolffe pull away to make sure you’re comfortable and asleep.

He sits up on his elbows and takes in his handiwork, biting his lower lip when he sees the bruises already forming all over your body. The contentment falters for a split second, but his worries evaporate when you sleepily reach for him and bring him back into your arms. He mutters his love for you one last time before surrendering to the comfort of your embrace, falling into a deep sleep almost as soon as he rests his cheek on your shoulder. 

It’s hours later when you wake, and you groan tiredly when the sunbeams hit your eyes and make it difficult to escape them. You turn to the other side and peek through your lashes, only to find Wolffe already wide awake, softly touching the length of your arm with his lips and nose, as if he was tracing every little mark he left on your body from last night. He looks up when he notices your breaths coming in erratically, winking at you and smirking at the sudden spirit of shyness falling over your tired form. 

“I can taste the sunlight on your skin.” He moans against your clavicle, lightly nipping at the skin over the bone when you turn away from him and hide beneath the sheets. 

“Hmm…such a smooth talker.” You groan from underneath the shield you’ve created, giggling like a little girl when Wolffe tugs them away and attacks your face with playful nips and kisses. 

“Only for you cyar’ika.” He whispers into your ear before biting at the space just below it, his touches becoming less playful and more needy as he takes in the way your body is reacting to his advances. 

“Wolffe, your lips feel so good.” You throw your head back and sink your nails into the muscles on his back, gasping for air the longer Wolffe continues to mark you up. It’s almost as if he was looking for spots on your skin he hasn’t left his bite marks or fingerprints on. Not that you were complaining. 

“Just my lips, General?” You can hear the smile on his handsome face, and you nearly push back to edge him on, but you realize it would serve you better to give into him and tell him what he wants to hear. 

“N-no, it’s everything you do to me Wolffe. It’s in your touch…your- your voice…your cock.”

“My little Jedi can’t get enough of me.” He shifts you in his arms until you’re laying on your stomach, and when you try to look back to see what he has in mind, he combs his finger into your hair and pushes you into the pillows until he has access to your back. When he hears whine his name, he descends down on you like a crazed man, sinking his teeth into the skin he wasn’t able to reach last night while pulling on your hair to remind you who was in charge. 

“Oh gods…never, Wolffe. Never. I want you all the kriffing time, even now…I just want you to- to,” you forget what you want to say, the need to commit this moment to memory outweighing whatever information your mind wanted to part with. It must be the reaction Wolffe was wanting for because he chuckles against your heated skin and finishes your thought for you. 

“Claim you?”

“Please.” You try to push the sheets away from you so you can feel him against your back, and Wolffe lets go of you for a split second to let you do whatever you wish, returning flush against you once you’re completely nude to his eyes. He’s on you in the blink of an eye, teasing you with the head of his hard cock while keeping a firm hold on your hips so you don’t move against him.

“Can’t really do that now, can I mesh’la?” He struggles through his words, his hungry eyes picturing all the things he still wants to do to you as you lay there beneath him, willingly submitting your entire self to him without a second thought. 

“You’re already mine, little Jedi. You’re mine, have been since you came here all those months ago and told me you wanted me.” He massages your back with his calloused hands, trying to come to terms with the fact that he will never be close enough to you. He’ll never get tired of this. He’ll never not want to touch you with everything he’s got. 

“But since you plead so sweetly,” you moan into the sheets as you feel him part your thighs and slowly sink his cock into your swollen cunt, keeping you filled to the brim and refusing to move until you begged some more. 

“Wolffe...” You reach back and tug on his hair to bring him closer to you, the need to hear what you do to him igniting a flame in your chest, one that only he could put out by showing you how much he craves you. 

“F-ffuck, you’ve ruined the mornings for me cyare. Now I- I won’t stop thinking of your wet, tight pussy when I…kriff, when I wake up.” Wolffe bites into your shoulder as he rolls his hips into you, no longer able to control his desires from you. He wanted you to know the effect you have on him, the hold you had on his very soul ever since you walked onto his ship and offered your aid all those months ago. 

“I’m yours Commander, always. Y-you can have me whenever you want.” You sigh heavily when he growls against your skin and continues to fuck into you without caring for how rough he’s being. 

“E-even at sunrise, General?” Wolffe chuckles as soon as your cunt clenches tightly around him at the mention of the honorific, letting you know that he enjoys calling you by your rank as much as he does when you moan his. 

“Especially at sunrise-” You barely manage to breathe out, smiling through the assault he was bringing on your body as you surrender yourself completely to him.

“My little tracinya,” Wolffe nuzzles into the crook of your neck, content with the way you seem to melt the harder he fills you with his cock. A part of him knows he should maybe discuss the incident from last night, but he finds it difficult to pay any mind to your words when he already has you so willing and wanting beneath him. 

Later, he would consider the little issue of your religion later. 

But for now, he was adamant on showing you his own.

[starlazergazer]

Pinky Promise

Pairing: Anakin x Reader

Request/Summary: One bed trope! / The reader follows Anakin into a dangerous warzone making him upset that she would put herself in harms way like that

Warnings: Some swearing

Word Count: 5k

A/N: I know the request was just for a simple one bed trope but for some reason I made this super angsty so I hope y’all still like it! As always let me know what you think and I greatly appreciate everyone reading these! I love you!!

 You sat across from Anakin in the cafeteria, fork, along with your appetite, long since abandoned on your too full plate before you.

“You’re really being sent to Orto Plutonia?” You asked the same question for what had to have been at least the fifth time since he had told you of the mission, still unable to fully wrap your head around it, still unable to fully accept it.

Anakin, however, barely spared you a glance as he took another bite of his food, shrugging slightly as he spoke “yeah It’ll be pretty cold but I think I can handle it”

And a part of you wanted to hate him for how nonchalant he was being about it. How he seemed to look the danger, the imminent threat to his life in the face and shrug. Another part of you, however, knew it was a façade erected fully for your benefit. Distracting your worry with a joke, an all too Anakin Skywalker think to do. “You know that’s not why I’m worried”

His eyes met yours briefly as his fork froze midair, a brief second passing as he took in your features before dropping the utensil and pushing the plate of food to the side, a soft chuckle as he shook his head “I’ve been in active warzones before Y/N, it’ll be fine”

You rolled your eyes at his attempt to brush you off, a small sigh escaping you as you crossed your arms defensively over you “I know but the Talz are known for their brutality, back home they’re the myth you tell stories about to scare children-“ and you paused as you watch him listen to you, watched the concern sink in but not for his upcoming mission, rather for you “Just be careful okay?”

A soft smirk grew over his lips as he chuckled “hey I’m always careful”

And you couldn’t help it but laugh back, Anakin’s laugh never failing to pull a similar one out of you “Every story Obi-wan has ever told me speaks contrary to that fact”

He scoffed dramatically at that, a hand coming up to his chest in mock hurt as he leaned back slightly “and you would believe Obi-wan over me?”

“Any day Skywalker” you smirked back at him, picking a piece of food off his plate and tossing it into your mouth.

He pretended to object at your theft of his food, but the way his eyes cut down to your own full plate showed the façade for what it was. He was just glad you were eating, even if it was his food. “yeah that’s probably fair”

And with that you let the comfortable silence fall between the two of you, eyes dancing back and forth between his for a moment before you couldn’t help yourself, hands coming forward to rest on his, pulling all his remaining attention (not that any of it was really straying) back to you “I’m serious Ani, please be careful”

His smile never slipped from his lips as he nodded, his voice dropping to a quieter tone as he said earnestly “I’ll be careful, I promise”

Finally deciding to believe him you raised your hands from his, raising one pinky and offering it to him with a raised brow.

Anakin laughed softly but nonetheless obliged, taking his own pinky and wrapping it around yours, whispering softly over the top of your hands “pinky promise”

-

You weren’t surprised that Anakin was the first one to greet you when you landed, no doubt he had identified your ship the moment it broke into the atmosphere. You weren’t even surprised at the confusion on his face as the dock slowly lowered, the slight panic that took over his features, something you had told yourself was bound to come as he recognized you, as you descended onto the planet’s surface.

“Y/N what are you doing here?” His voice was strained slightly, eyes flitting around to each of your companions as if they could explain what he was seeing.

“My job” you answered simply, keeping your head held high as you marched past him, Anakin’s shock freezing him place for mere moments before he jogged ahead, coming to a stop before you, effectively blocking your path.

“Y/N this is an active war zone” he stated it as if you simply hadn’t known where you had landed, as if you hadn’t been the one to give him those same words of warning just days ago.

“I know” you answered calmly “I’m here to negotiate” and again you tried to push past him.

This time, however, a hand at your elbow halted your movement, holding you in place in front of him “no you’re not” his tone here this time did surprise you, the finality in it, the slight edge of a threat he pushed into it. For the first time in your life you truly felt like you were talking to the jedi Anakin Skywalker and not your friend.

“Yes I am” you insisted, trying to pull his grip off you but he held on, squeezing not hard enough to hurt but hard enough to make extracting yourself from him difficult.

“Go home Y/N” the condescension in his tone had you gritting your teeth, as if you were a child he was punishing, as if he had any authority to tell you what to do.

Looking up at him through your lashes you clenched your jaw, seeing that he was already doing the same, standing firm in his position “I’m here as the senator of Pantora now take your hand off me General Skywalker and let me do my job”

“Your job is back on Coruscant-“ Anakin took a step closer as he spoke, his voice dropping slightly lower, though you stopped listening after just a few words, your eyes flitting to the horizon more than happy to recognize a familiar face just a few yards off.

“General Kenobi it’s good to see you” you called loudly over Anakin’s shoulder, relishing the way he froze slightly at the sound of his master’s name, the soft curse the left his lips as you felt his fingers slip from your elbow allowing you to push past him, careful not to look up at him as you did so, keeping your eyes on Obi-wan as you extended a hand out to greet him.

“Senator Y/L/N it’s good to see you as well” Obi-wan greeted you with a confused smile “I wasn’t aware you would be joining us”

“I was sent here to negotiate peace with the Talz” you explained in what you hoped wasn’t a too insincere smile, something that became harder to force as you heard the thinly vailed anger in Anakin’s voice from over your shoulder.

“Pantora has no jurisdiction over this planet”

You grit your teeth as you tried to keep calm, not even bothering to look in his direction as you answered “As the only other inhabited planet in this sector the senate decided I could serve as negotiator on this matter”

“Well we’re glad to have you” Obi-wan broke in before Anakin could get off a word, sending a small glare over to his former padawan as he addressed you “the sooner we can resolve this peacefully the better, I’ve already lost enough men”

“I completely agree general” you nodded at him before casting your eyes off into the distance “I here chairman Cho is here I would like to speak with him-“

Anakin cut you off before you could finish, his voice sounding closer than before “Senator could I speak with you for a moment?”

And for the first time you spun around to meet Anakin’s gaze, not missing the malcontent fire that raged beneath the surface ‘I’m afraid I really must speak to chairman Cho” you offered with a sickeningly sweet smile.

“It will be quick” he insisted firmly.

Leaving you with no more to really say you nodded reluctantly, giving Obi-wan a small smile as you followed him off to the side, Anakin waiting until he was out of earshot before turning on you. “really? There was no one else who could’ve come?”

“Did you miss the part about Pantora being the only other planet inhabited in this sector?” You countered, matching the barely held rage he had in his voice.

“You were the one that was just warning me about how dangerous it was to be here” he exclaimed, gesturing vaguely to the sounds of blaster fire over the horizon.

“And you came anyways because it was your job, and now my job has brought me here too same as you” you crossed your arms defensively over your chest.

“So you pretend to be sick, or you give any sort of excuse to get you out of this trip because anyone could’ve come here to negotiate. Chairman cho is even already here as a negotiator” he countered in exasperation only making you shake your head.

“And you see how well that’s been going, how many of your own clone troopers have you lost already to this fight?”

You could practically see the rage boil up inside of him, hands coming to his hips as his intense gaze broke from yours, a loud exhale sounding from him as he took a step back, shaking his head before he looped back around to stand in front of you, hand coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose “you can’t be here Y/N it’s not-“

“I am here general Skywalker” you broke him off sharply “I’m here to do my job and I’m not leaving till it’s done, now if you excuse me I’m going to speak to the chairman”

Anakin caught your arm before you could move, holding you in place once again as his gaze bore down into your own, a soft plea edging into his must softer tone as he spoke “Please Y/N”

And admittedly you felt the fire within you die at the sound, your chest hollowing as you looked up at Anakin, never finding it easy to say no to him. “The sooner I do my job the sooner we can all get out of here”

Again there was a flicker in the muscle of his jaw as he clenched it, his eyes hardening slightly as he recognized your resolve in the matter, giving you a loud, long exhale before releasing your arm with a small nod. Clearly not agreeing with your decision to stay, but at least finally recognizing he could do nothing about it.

Without saying anything more you returned the nod before turning around and heading towards the main encampment, Anakin never more than two steps behind you.

-

By the end of the day you were practically dragging your feet towards the inn the squadron had rented a few rooms in to stay for the night.

Your day had been spent in meetings entirely with the republics side so far and Anakin had been right at your side for each and every one of them, offering one hell of a glare to anyone who so much as mentioned meeting with the Talz.

He made it beyond difficult to focus as with every step he was always just a bit too close, looming over you at every corner, anger radiating off of him in massive waves, making it abundantly clear to not only you but everyone you met with that he didn’t think you should be there thereby undercutting your authority at every opportunity.

You had at least thought you could get some sort of break from him for the night but upon reaching the inn you learned that you were to share a room with two beds, meaning not a single moment since you landed on this planet could be spent outside of Anakin Skywalker’s disappointed glare.

Nevertheless, you sucked it up as he followed you up the stairs to your room, knowing that any argument from your side could set him off again, could have him yelling at you to go back to Coruscant, and right now you’ll take stoic anger over animated yelling any day,

Without so much as a word in his direction you stuck the key into the door of your room, pushing it open with your hip and coming to a dead stop as you looked inside, your eyes landing on the one massive bed taking up the majority of the space in the room instead of the two it was supposed to house.

You spun around on the spot before Anakin could come in any farther, planting one hand on the doorframe physically baring entry “you’re finding another room”

He gave you a brief confused look before casting his eyes above your head, surveying the furniture with a small, annoying smirk “nice try”

“absolutely not” you tried to stop his train of thought before it could get any farther “go bunk with obi-wan or something”

And in response you saw his jaw clench just as it had countless times today, his arms coming up to cross over his chest, telling you he was ready to put up a fight “I’m not leaving you alone”

“It’s for 8 hours while everyone sleeps” you argued back, feeling the anger flicker like hot fire in your chest.

“and what would the council think if I left the one senator on Orto Plutonia completely defenseless for 8 hours?”

You could have laughed in his face at the question, your response coming back without any real thought necessary “and since when have you ever cared about what the council thought?”

“Since it came to your safety” his answer came back just as quick, just as reflexive, making your own anger die in your throat.

“Do you realize what you being here does to your safety” he seemed to demand an answer more than ask, though instead carried on without waiting for one “both sides want a war, you have to see that”

“That’s why I’m here” you cut in angrily, crossing your arms over your chest “to negotiate peace and stop that”

“You’re here as the perfect target” he shook his head, breaking down his thought process as if he were talking to a child “if either side can get the other to take you out they can mark that as an unmotivated attack and declare war, blaming the other for starting it. You being here paints a massive target on your back.”

“So-“ you started to shoot back but he cut you off, stepping forward just enough to tower over you.

“So that’s why I’m here, that’s why I’m always two steps behind you, and that’s why we will be sharing a room tonight even if I have to sleep on the floor” and he pushed past you as if you hadn’t been standing in his way, grabbing one of the pillows from the bed and throwing it onto the ground at the foot of it.

“So I should’ve just stayed on Coruscant?” you asked him as you shut the door behind you “just let them go on bombing each other until one eventually surrenders”

“Yes” he answered simply, not even bothering to look at you as he took off his cloak and laid it on the floor next to his pillow.

“You don’t really believe that” you scoffed “those are your men out there suffering the consequences of this ongoing violence, someone needed to come out here and put an end to it”

“And did that someone need to be you?” His head snapped up to meet your gaze as he raised his eyebrows slightly, silently daring you to say otherwise.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes at the same question he had asked earlier, shaking your head slightly as you started to make your way to the bed, ready to let him brood on the floor for the night if that was what he wanted.

“No look at me” His serious tone froze you in place, not missing the way his voice had softened, even if his posture remained as rigid as ever. “I’m serious tell me the truth, did you need to be the one to come out here to negotiate or did the republic just want to send a senator”

And all you could do was clench your jaw in response, bite down the words that sprang forth. The lies and the truths because at this point you weren’t sure any more which would be worse.

Anakin, however, read your silence like a book.

He deflated slightly on the spot, his eyes closing as he shook his head, his hand coming up to pinch at the bridge of his nose “damnit Y/N”

“You were here!” you objected quickly “what was I supposed to do just abandon you out here?”

“Yes!” He broke in quickly, matching your volume as both of your voices raised “I can handle myself. You were the one warning me about being here why the fuck would you think it would be a good idea to come here yourself?”

“You were the one that brushed off my warning” you pointed out “you acted like my fears were unfounded that being here was no big deal”

“Because I didn’t want you to worry”

And you let that statement hang in the air for a moment, let its ridiculous nature ruminate a little as you watched Anakin’s chest rise and fall rapidly with his pent-up anger.

“You really think that would be all it takes to make me not worry about you?”

He rolled his eyes at your response with an exasperated sigh, turning away from you deliberately and sitting down on his makeshift bed on the floor, trying to physically shut down the conversation.

“No you’re angry right now because I’m putting myself in danger, because you’re worried about me, how do you think I feel every time you leave?”

“Just drop it Y/N” he tried to shrug you off, laying down on his pillow on the hard ground.

But still you pressed on “Every time you run off on a new mission, putting yourself on the front lines of some battle you think I don’t worry just like this? You think I’m a stranger to exactly how you’re feeling right now?” You scoffed “I’m so sorry that for once it has to be you worrying about me”

Anakin sat up suddenly, turning to face you, his jaw clenched so tightly you could see the muscle through his skin “the difference is it’s my job. I’m a general, I’ve been trained to be on the front lines, to protect myself, to fight battles. You’re a senator, your job-“

“-is to negotiate peace and advocate for those who can’t speak for themselves” you broke in before he could answer, eyebrows raised silently daring him to say otherwise “which is exactly what I’m doing here”

With a bitter chuckle he shook his head, twisting back around to lay down “fine then you do your job, let me do mine”

“fine”

And with that you turned back towards the bed, getting ready to climb into it when you looked down at Anakin, laying without a blanket on the hard floor, arms wrapped pathetically around himself as he faced the wall.

And even though you were still reeling from your fight a bit of guilt started to creep into you. Because even though you still thought he was going overboard and being ridiculous you had been telling the truth when you said you knew firsthand how he felt.

You’d spent too many nights staying up waiting for any info regarding his safety, waiting for him to finally land on Coruscant, waiting for him to be okay. You knew his anger was coming from a good place, even if it still didn’t give him the right to be a jerk about it, and even more you knew exactly what sleeping on the hard floor all night would do to him.

Stalking over to where he lay on the floor you gave his feet a soft kick “come on there’s enough room on the bed for the both of us”

“I’m fine” he shrugged you off, not even bothering to look in your direction.

With a roll of your eyes and a frustrated groan you stalked over to the bed and grabbed a pillow off of it, throwing it to the ground making sure it made a loud thump before sitting down next to it.

Your display had the desired effect. Shortly after Anakin was pushing himself up to a sitting position and spinning around to look at you, a very unamused expression gracing his features. “what’re you doing?”

“You don’t take the bed I don’t take the bed” you answered simply, making a show of fluffing your pillow.

“You’re being ridiculous” he groaned, rubbing a tired hand over his face in exasperation.

“Oh so you are aware of the concept” you goaded him with a raised brow, fighting the smirk off your face as he glared back at you.

“You’re gonna wake up tomorrow with a sore back, just take the bed”

“And you know some magical way of sleeping that won’t make yours sore tomorrow?”

“Y/N-“

“You think it’s your job to protect me then why would you risk a sore back on something as stupid as sleeping on the floor” you cut him off before he could continue, crossing your arms over your chest, knowing you had trapped him.

And to your delight you watched him clench his jaw in response, watched a deep breath rack through him before he stood, marching across the room towards you, fierce gaze never straying from your eyes as he did so. You fought the urge to shrink from it.

Wordlessly he took your pillow from the ground and threw it onto one side of the bed, pausing for one moment to look down at you still sitting on the floor before making his way back across the room to grab his own pillow and bring it to the other side of the bed before silently sliding onto the mattress, back pointedly facing you.

And though a million passive aggressive comments flowed to your tongue you bit back each, knowing when to accept your victory. You pushed yourself to your feet and crawled into bed next to him, careful to make as little movement as possible as you did so lest you set him off more.

A heavy silence filled the room as you stared out at the wall, unable to even think about going to sleep after what had just happened. Luckily, it would seem Anakin had the same predicament.

“I don’t just think it’s my job to protect you”

His voice didn’t hold any of the anger, the malice you would have expected. Rather it was soft, sad even. A voice that was begging to by listened to.

“You don’t have orders to be my bodyguard” you responded back, careful to keep your tone even and your voice low “Obi-wan out ranks you here and I know he’s given no such order so if anything he would be”

“I don’t care about orders” his response came quickly, desperately “I just want you to be safe”

You took a beat to let his words sink in, to mull them over, to formulate your own response, before you turned onto your back, not fully facing him but a half truce.

“My job isn’t any less important than yours”

Your words were met with silence, clearly a response Anakin hadn’t been expecting.

“Other senators could’ve been sent but these are my people, or if not my people than my neighbors. I’m the only one with skin in the game. I’m the one with the best chance to end things before too many people end up dead.”

“And if you end up dead?”

You were surprised to see how quickly and naturally your answer came to you “then at least they can say I died trying”

Another silence blanketed the room, not quite as tense as the last but nonetheless uncomfortable, before you heard Anakin shift positions from his side of the bed. A look out of the corner of your eye telling you he was lying on his back too, the both of you staring up at the ceiling above you. It wasn’t much but it felt like a start, and for now that could be enough.

-

You woke slowly the next morning, too much light filtering into the room drawing you back to consciousness but stubbornness kept your eyes closed, refusing to let go of the last remaining bit of sleep.

The bed beneath you was soft and warm, pulling a content groan from your lips as you shifted your position slightly, pulling the blanket up to your chin and digging your shoulder a bit deeper into the mattress, deciding to give yourself another few minutes before getting out of bed.

That was until you heard another soft groan echo yours. Your eyes shot open as you finally registered the unnatural extra weight draped around your middle, the hard body radiating heat pressed firmly against your back, the long legs intertwined with your own.

The arm draped around your waist tightened its hold, drawing you deeper into Anakin’s sleeping form, a content hum slipping past the jedi’s lips as you felt his breath tickle to top of your ear. “5 more minutes”

The low grumble of his morning voice had your cheeks heating up as you hid your face further into the blanket, taking the opportunity to tuck yourself even further into him, relishing the way his warmth fully encapsulated you. “5 more”

The hair around your ear stirred softly as the sharp exhale of a chuckle left his lips making you smile as well.

“I’m sorry Y/N”

Those words crashed you back to reality, pulling you out of the comfort of the present moment, of the security of Anakin’s tight hold on you, out of the strange familiarity of the present moment, and forced you back to the fight last night, to his reaction when you had landed, to the idea of being the subject of Anakin’s ire.

You rolled over onto your stomach, feeling Anakin’s arm reluctantly slide off you as you did so but pointedly not holding you in place, propping yourself up on your elbow to better look at him only to see his alert gaze already trained on you, one elbow propping himself up slightly.

You said nothing in response, waiting for him to expand, to prove that he knew what he did wrong, to prove that he truly meant the apology. And for a second he said nothing, blue eyes bouncing slowly back and forth between your own before he took a slow deep breath.

“I didn’t meant to imply that your job was less important than mine, or that you weren’t allowed to make your own decisions” he sighed softly, one hand coming out to you, soft fingertips just barely skimming over the skin of your cheek as he tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, hand sliding down to rest in the base of your neck for just a moment before retreating “I just liked it better when you were back on Coruscant and I knew you were safe”

You opened your mouth to reply but he shook his head softly.

“you showing up here with no warning, with no extra protection, with no apparent regard for your own safety…it scared me”

And looking up at him you could see the sincerity in his statement, it was in the soft draw of his brow, the slight pout of his lips, the desperate look in his eye. Reaching forward slightly you grabbed his hand and pulled it into yours, giving it a soft squeeze “I know but I needed to be here”

And a heartbeat passed, then two, a small silence starting to settle in a way that you knew meant he had brushed you off again, before he spoke. “I know”

A part of you was embarrassed by how much relief came from just those two words, a simple acknowledgement, but a bigger part of you knew better, knew the weight those words held, the unspoken understanding that had just settled between the two of you, and rejoiced in it.

You gave him a soft smile, bringing the knuckles of his hand up to your lips and pressing a soft kiss into the skin “thank you Ani”

He chuckled back down at you, the hand you held in yours coming up to give your cheek a soft pinch before he withdrew it, pulling you along with it, pulling your head to rest comfortably on his chest as he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his side.

“Is this really how you feel every time I go?”

And you wanted to laugh at the ridiculous question, at how that could have never occurred to him. Instead you tried putting yourself in his shoes.

“I know you trained your whole life for this, and I know you can handle yourself, I fully trust that you can handle any situation you put yourself in” A soft sigh, a slight hiccup in Anakin’s breath as he waited for the inevitable ‘but’ “but of course I worry, of course I don’t want you to go. It kills me every time to watch you fly away to the next warzone”

“I’m sorry Y/N”

“Don’t be” you shrug him off without a second thought “it’s your job and you’re doing important work. I just need you to give me that same attitude when I have to do something dangerous for mine. You don’t get a monopoly on stupid, dangerous decisions”

You could hear his heart beating through his ribs, could feel his hand come up from your back to play softly with the ends of your hair, a low rumble reverberating up through his chest before he spoke again “If I promise to stop making stupid, dangerous decisions when I don’t have to will you do the same?”

You snorted at his question, craning your neck up to meet his gaze as you raised a brow “I’d like to see you try Skywalker”

He scoffed in mock offense “I could make smart, safe decisions”

“Sure” you chuckled, your gaze coming back down to rest your head in a comfortable position on his chest “do you even know how to properly use a ship’s landing gear?”

“I’ll have you know in many situations it was actually the safer decision to crash land the plane” he challenged back but you could hear the smile in his voice.

Shutting your eyes and burrowing your head further into him you hummed softly “sure name one”

His chest shook slightly as his laugh ruminated through his body but he offered no defense, letting the silence hang in the air for a moment before you saw his hand beside him move slightly towards your head, the pinky alone extended in your direction.

With a soft chuckle you shook your head softly, pulling your own pinky up to wrap around his, whispering the promise into his chest.

[tossawary]

I'm going to rewatch "Revenge of the Sith" later and I don't remember the original trilogy all that well either, but... both "The Phantom Menace" and "Attack of the Clones" seem to suffer tremendously during their final battles because the films keep cutting away from the potentially dramatically and emotionally rich sequences to... the childish physical comedy adventures of sidekick characters.

I'm not going to pretend that "Star Wars" isn't incredibly silly at times. "Return of the Jedi" has the Empire being murdered by teddy bears with sticks at one point, and I am personally incredibly fond of this sequence and the Ewoks generally for no good reason I can name. But, from what I remember, that movie was better editing-wise about letting more dramatic sequences like Luke versus Vader breathe emotionally. We had some time to settle into these fights, to feel Luke's fear and anger, to see Luke's resolve, you know?

And in "A New Hope", the climatic dogfights involve people dying and it's treated quite seriously. A lot of lives are on the line with the Death Star's destruction. The characters go into the battle knowing that some of them won't make it back. And in "The Empire Strikes Back"... as far as I vaguely remember, there's not very much silliness at all at the end of that movie, the protagonists "lose" and all of the characters are in a lot of pain. The camera stays with them to show us their agony and grief and strength.

But in "The Phantom Menace", the film keeps cutting away from Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan versus Maul in favor of Jar-Jar Binks tripping over droids. Jar-Jar Binks fighting to defend his homeworld against an invading army, as his people die around him, is treated as an utter joke. Pure comedic relief with no substance at an utterly inappropriate time. They are undercutting the "war" in "Star Wars" that was a big part of its tone. The film doesn't bother to treat anyone like they or their lives matter in that sequence. And Anakin is in a ship he's struggling to pilot against an entire army, but we never get any real sense of him being afraid of dying in space or being at risk, as he almost accidentally saves the day. Padmé is just... fighting down hallways and it's kind of boring, both action-wise and emotionally. I spent most of the time wishing that the camera would just cut back to Maul again because that fight had actual, like, substance.

And in "Attack of the Clones", the film keeps wasting time cutting back to Threepio with his head accidentally stuck on a battle droid's body, when it's not even clear why he and Artoo are even there beyond just jamming them in as iconic figures from the original trilogy. They shouldn't be there!!! This is blatant shoehorning!!! This is valuable screentime that the Battle of Geonosis could use to focus on the Jedi who are being killed, on the separatists who are being invaded, or on the clones who have just entered the war. Mace Windu or Obi-Wan Kenobi reacting emotionally to the nameless Jedi being cut down around them would have been nice. The confrontations with Dooku could have dug deeper into the emotional and physical pain of his betrayal.

Mace Windu's fight with Jango could have been longer, instead, seeing as the hardest emotional beat we actually get in this film confronting the death of this battle is probably Boba picking up Jango's helmet. A kid has lost his dad!!! We could have seen any of the clones reacting to this, maybe? We could have seen Mace Windu telling Obi-Wan about Jango's death and then Obi-Wan belatedly realizing that they don't know what happened to Jango's child in the chaos. "The Clone Wars" television show ended up doing so much heavy lifting emotionally for this trilogy, because these movies are way too busy with unnecessary Jar-Jar Binks and Threepio physical comedy in all the wrong places.

"Revenge of the Sith" as far as I remember is at least too busy finally focusing on everything going to hell and the tragedy to fit in a jarring sidekick comedy sequence during any final battle. Can you even imagine? Anakin is murdering younglings and the movie keeps cutting back to Threepio and Jar-Jar tripping over droids and shrieking trying to escape Coruscant? I don't remember the movie that well. If there actually is a sidekick physical comedy sequence through the end of the fights in "Revenge of the Sith" that I have blocked from my memory, then I am going to scream into a pillow.

[throughparisallthroughrome]

"In Darkness, We Transcend"

Chapter 5: Cult of Personality

Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x Reader

Word Count: 7.9k

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of suicide,

A/N: SOOOOOO sorry this took so long! I ended up having to split this chapter into 2 part (got a little carried away with dialogue oops) so I promise the next one is coming soon. I really really can’t wait for it (it ends on an awful cliffhanger…) Please enjoy!! Let me know if you want to be tagged <3

Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4.

No matter how you stacked the crystals on your nightstand, they never looked right to you. 

Your time as a Jedi allowed you to develop a liking for the diverse minerals available in the galaxy. There were millions, and you spent a reasonable amount of time collecting as many as possible when you got the chance. All different colors, shapes, and sizes. They reminded you that there were so many opportunities in the galaxy and the beauty that came with that. Especially now, you were grateful for that reminder. 

You stacked one called “pietersite” you found in a cave on Alderaan on top of a piece of ocean jasper from Kamino. You felt the colors looked nice together, and you had always wanted a cairn next to your bed. The tranquility was necessary, as you did everything you could to bring it to your space. Just as you got them to balance, your hands knocked them over as a knock on the door across the apartment startled you.

You sighed and set them down, realizing that you should probably focus your energy on the surrounding boxes instead of some rocks next to your bed. A week had passed since you were knighted and granted more spacious living quarters. Quarters that fit your status much more. While you didn't receive the role of master, they provided you with quarters befitting one. It must be some sick way for the council to apologize for what they put you through with the Children of Nox. Funny. 

As you strolled through the small apartment and to your door, you wished you had this space when writing. It would have made that process much more comfortable- well- as comfortable as it could have been. Writing for months on end about a cult you were unwillingly indoctrinated into in the name of research wasn’t exactly “easy.” After tripping over a few boxes and loose items, you finally reached the door and pressed a few buttons, buzzing in your mystery visitor.

“Master Kenobi!” You exclaimed, a hint of confusion lacing your voice, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“The pleasure is all mine, Y/N.” He smiled at you, though a hint of sadness was present in his eyes. Besides the look in his eyes, you felt it in the force that something wasn’t right. Your own smile dropped. 

“Is everything okay, Master Kenobi?” You gulped slightly, watching as the man in front of you searched for something to say, opening his mouth in response before closing it harshly.

“Why don’t we take a walk?” 

He led you through the temple and into the gardens, passing several younglings and other Jedi along the way. You felt yourself growing more nervous as the seconds passed, the silence between the two of you excruciating. You knew deep down that whatever he was about to tell you couldn’t be good. Your hands grew sweaty, and you discreetly attempted to wipe them on the sides of your robes. 

Obi-wan knew you were nervous. Hell, he was feeling worse and worse about this as he led you to the garden. There was no going back from this. And although you both attempted to hide your nerves from one another, they were painfully obvious. You noticed his discretion, and it piqued your interest (As well as kinda made you want to die).

“Master Kenobi,” You followed him as he stood on the ledge, looking at the city surrounding you both, “Why did you bring me here?”

He sighed deeply, bringing his hand up to scratch his beard in thought, “I’m afraid there’s no easy way to discuss this.”

“Discuss what?” You felt your breathing hitch. Fuck. This was not good. 

“The council likes to believe that what they do is in the best interest of everyone.” He looks off in the distance, avoiding your lingering gaze. “As a member of said council, I’d like to say that’s true. But there are cases where I feel as if maybe we could have handled things a bit better.” 

“Obi-Wan, is this about the Children of Nox?” Your hands shook as the words left your mouth, and you carefully put them behind your back, avoiding his concerned eyes. 

“No, I’m afraid we’ve moved past that.” He motions for you to follow him, sitting down on a bench surrounded by beautiful trees, vines, and various flowers. “Congratulations, by the way. I’m glad Anakin and I could make it to the ceremony. It’s a great honor to be knighted, and after everything you’ve been through, you deserve it.” 

“Thank you,” you mumble while fidgeting with the rings on your fingers, feeling an unpleasant taste on your tongue at the mention of his padawan’s name. “But if it’s not about them…” You trailed off as you turned to face him, watching his lips form a frown. 

“I’m afraid the council has been lying to you, Y/N. And I’d like to preface that even though this was before my time as a member, I was involved. And for that, I am so sorry. I hope you know that at the time, I thought I was doing what was in your best interest as a youngling. I hope one day you can forgive me.”

“Master…” You trailed off, your eyes wide and body shaking at his words. What could Obi-Wan Kenobi could have possibly done to you?

“Y/N, Anakin isn’t the only chosen one. Actually, he is one half of the chosen one prophecy.” He smiles gently at you, putting his hand on top of your shaking one. “You are the missing half.”

“W-What?” You manage to croak out, your mind not believing the words coming out of his mouth. 

“I really shouldn’t be telling you any of this- I could face expulsion from the order. I feel as if I owe it to you after everything that has happened in the past year. It’s not your fault, and it’s not Anakin’s. The council made a decision that seemed to be the most beneficial at the time.”

“I-I don’t understand.”

“They picked Anakin as their chosen one and made sure that you stayed separated from him as long as they could. I know that you and Anakin don’t know each other, but that isn’t an accident, either. Anakin doesn’t know any of this, and I’m afraid I can’t tell him quite yet. They were worried about what could happen if you met too young and how this would look to the younger Jedi. The Jedi code prevents attachments even though the prophecy states an attachment between the two of you would bring balance to the force. The Council was selfish in its decision, believing that maybe Anakin could bring balance to the force on his own. But he can’t. He’s reckless a-and, selfish, and angry. I’m afraid that you would be his only hope.”

Your blood suddenly boiled as you realized the implications of his words.

“Does that mean they sent me on a ‘research’ mission to the Children of Nox in an effort to keep me away from him? All for the selfishness of their code?” You spoke plainly, attempting to hide the anger within you. Obi-Wan adverted your gaze, giving you the answer you needed.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry. I had no idea when I agreed that it would go this far. That it would cause so much pain to you and Anakin both. I’d give anything to change my decision.” He attempted to console you with his touch once again, his eyes widening as you flinched away from him.

“What else, Obi-Wan?” You stated flatly, the anger and sorrow in your voice leaving you. In this moment, you only felt empty.

“Well, there is something else. This decision wasn’t made by the current Council, as the prophecy is thousands of years old.”

“But you just said it was?” You interrupt, furrowing your brows in confusion.

“The current Council decided to uphold the plans made by those during the High Republic. The decision to separate the chosen ones goes beyond just our Jedi Council. It was made decades ago, deciding that the best option was to keep things as normal as possible. I’m afraid these things were decided before you or Anakin were born.”

“Obi-Wan, what is considered normal? I feel like you aren’t telling me something.” He sighs once again, leaning back against the bench.

“Admittedly, yes. The Council fears the power the two of you may possess together. It’s new and scary and something that has been foretold as long as the Jedi has existed. The fact that it’s come true within our time is just- I don’t even know how to explain it. But it seems that the Council and the Jedi have long been afraid of the power the chosen one prophecy could bring- and I know that isn’t fair to you or Anakin. But that is just the way things were and always have been, unfortunately.”

Obi-Wan was met with your silence as you stared off into the distance, letting the news wash over you.

“So I’ve lived my entire life like this because the Council was too fucking afraid of the prophecy they are supposed to uphold?” You don’t falter from your gaze out onto the horizon, speaking as calmly as possible in this situation. 

“I’m afraid so, Y/N.”

“And you’re not telling Anakin for what reason?”

“I know the boy- and he won’t take this nearly as well as you are. I fear what he may do if he finds out.” Obi-Wan mumbles the last part of his sentence, the guilt washing over him as you come to terms with the situation.

“There’s that fucking word again,” You mumble, balling your fists at your side as you take another deep breath, “I-I can’t fucking believe this.” You choke out a sob, feeling Obi-Wan trying to soothe you once again.

“Don’t!” You shoot up, shouting at him, “Don’t fucking touch me right now. Please.”

“Y/N, I’m so sorr-“ 

“Please stop, Obi-Wan! I just-“ You take another shaky breath, gripping your knees to ground yourself, “This is unbelievable. My entire fucking life as a Jedi is a lie. I’ve done everything in the name of the Order and in the name of what I thought was the greater good. What I’ve been taught as a CHILD is in the name of the greater good. I’ve been indoctrinated here as well, the Order isn’t much better than the Children of Nox- just preaching different things.” You trail off as your realization hits you, Obi-Wan staying silent next to you.

“I’m afraid I must leave, Master Kenobi.” You stand up, your voice shaking as you brush off your robes. “I hope you can understand my decision.” 

“Y/N, wait-“ He grabs your arm as you turn to leave the gardens, forcing you to face him one last time, “I know there’s nothing I can do to convince you to stay. I can’t say I blame you for wanting to leave. But please- don’t do anything irrational. And just know that I am so sorry.”

You take a deep breath, pull your hand back from his, and nod, a reassuring smile spreading across your lips. The second you turn away from him and make your way back to your quarters, tears start falling freely as your heart pounds. 

You’re not sure at what point you broke out into a run, but as you sprinted through the temple halls, ignoring the looks of those around you, you knew that you needed to get out of there as fast as possible. Your legs and hands were shaking, your mind racing as your body felt like it was going numb. Breathing was nearly impossible, and by the time you opened your door, you collapsed on the floor, the panic attack washing over you as fresh tears streamed down your face.

You let out a quiet wail, the sobs taking over your body as you struggled to catch your breath. You attempted to cover your hand over your mouth, wanting to conceal the sounds of your cries from the others in the temple. It was over. Obi-Wan had told you everything you needed to know in order to solidify the end of your days as a Jedi. 

Everything you knew was a lie. Everything Anakin knew was a lie. And no matter what Obi-Wan had told you- you’d never stop hating Anakin. He got the best missions, the chosen one treatment. The only thing you ever did to surpass him was being knighted first. And you knew he hated it. You saw it in his eyes at the ceremony. 

You managed to pick yourself up off the floor, making your way to your bedroom as you shakily put the few belongings you wanted to keep in a couple of bags. Some clothes you needed, toiletries, pictures from your time as a youngling, any awards or sentiments as a Jedi, some books you enjoyed as well as the copy of your books, and finally, your lightsaber. You knew Eric’s door was always open to you, so that’s where you eventually ended up. 

You’d never go back to the temple. 

“Hey,” You heard a soft voice mumble next to you as you stirred in your sleep, your eyes fluttering open in confusion.

Anakin smiled as he nudged you, watching your brows furrow through exhaustion. You groaned softly at the disturbance, lifting your hand that had somehow ended up on his knee to your eyes and rubbing it. He unknowingly gave a slight frown at the lack of contact from your knee and the way you suddenly lifted your head off of his shoulder. You let out a small yawn, covering your hand over your mouth in the process. Anakin giggled at your tiredness, finding it difficult not to.

“Fuck,” You grumbled, the sleep giving a slight scratch to your voice, “How long was I out, Ani?” 

He blushed a little at the old nickname your sister had given to him while cracking a smile, “Like 10 minutes.”

“That’s it? Maker…” You put your head in your hands and shook briefly, attempting to wake yourself up.

You suddenly cleared your throat, moving away from Anakin as you realized how close you had been sitting next to him. You were so tired before that nothing other than the rest mattered at the moment. Now you were uncomfortable again. Anakin, of course, noticed this, and it took everything within him to not reach out and comfort you. He knew this had to be fixed on your own terms, as much as he hated it. 

“Thank you,” You mumbled to the cab driver, throwing him some credits and crawling out of the vehicle. 

The air was brisk, and you felt the hair stand on the back of your neck. You wrapped your shawl closer around your arms and over your head, glancing up at the stairs to the landing pad. Anakin stood next to you, wincing gently at the breeze in his face.

“Ready?” You sighed at his words, choosing silence as a better option before beginning to walk up the stairs. 

He quickly followed behind you, making sure to glance behind him. When you reached the top of the stairs, you paused, taking in the sight of the cruiser before you. It was big, and it was exactly what you needed. It wasn’t a warship, either; it fell more into the “luxury” category. But as your eyes trailed down the ship, you noticed a hooded figure standing beneath it. 

You instantly tensed up, and Anakin immediately felt you through the force. You both exchanged nervous glances as the two of you reached for your lightsabers instinctively. Before he could say anything, you began to slowly walk towards the figure, feeling something familiar about it. He mentally cursed himself and then followed closely behind, unclipping his lightsaber from his belt and holding it close. 

You stood tall and took the shawl off of your head, feeling braver as the force signature of the person in front of you became more familiar. “I’m afraid you have the wrong platform. This is Jedi business.” You stated coldly, gripping your lightsaber tighter, your knuckles turning white from your nerves. Anakin nearly choked hearing you call yourself a Jedi and how boldly you spoke. 

“Do I?” The voice was melodic and one you had craved for so long. You instantly grinned.

The figure turned around and met your eyes, smiling wide on their face. You clipped your lightsaber back and ran to them, pulling them into a tight embrace and taking in as much of them as possible.

“Fuck, I missed you so much Padmé.”

You swang each other around, giggling and laughing as you held tightly. You buried your head into her shoulder, breathing in the scent of your older sister. 

“It’s been too long, Y/N. I’ve heard so much about you lately. I’m so sorry I haven’t visited sooner, and I-I’m sorry for our circumstances now.” She pulls away from the hug, still holding onto your body tightly as she searches your eyes for any response. You brush off her apology, pulling her in for another tight hug.

“No need to apologize. You’re here now, and that’s what matters. Wait, Padme- Where’s your security? I don’t like you here alone.” You search the perimeter, Anakin walking up next to you and nodding to Padme. 

“Y/N, they’re here. I promise. I asked them to give us a moment together- they don’t need to know what’s happening. You’re starting to sound like Anakin.” She giggles at you, raising an eyebrow slightly at her underlying claim. 

“I-” You cut yourself off with a laugh, giving her another quick hug before pulling away and taking another look at the ship. 

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Padme asks, stepping beside you and glancing up at the ship, “Made sure you got the best one we could offer.”

“Y-You did this?” You turn to her with a smile, noticing how she looks back away from you and at Anakin. You turn to face his grin.

“It was my idea, but Padme shouldn’t give me the credit. Figured it was better than some old, suspicious republic warship they gave to the Jedi. Although, I didn’t know she was coming to say goodbye.”

She beams at Anakin’s words, grinning back at you. 

“Guilty as charged.” You look between Anakin and Padme, the words stuck on your tongue. As much as you wanted to stay with Padme and catch up, Obi-Wan’s life depended on you. 

“Padme…” You turned to face her, the sorrow in your eyes telling her everything it needed to. 

“Go,” she pulls you in, holding her hand against the back of your head and squeezing her eyes shut. “Do what you have to do. Just... please be safe. Come back, preferably in one piece.” 

You nod against her, letting a sob take over you as you embrace her warmth for what feels like the last time. She cries too, mouthing to Anakin behind you to keep you safe, and he gives her a solemn nod, feeling tense about the situation. You shudder beneath her touch, taking a deep breath and pulling away. She smiles gently at you before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. 

“Come to Naboo when it’s all over.” Padme squeezes your shoulders.

“I-I’d love to, but I have the restaurant and-”

“Y/N, it can wait. Our family needs you right now- especially after all of this. Please. Do it for us. You need to rest, honey.” She reaches out to you again, and you bite your lip, thinking over your response as your leg bounces.

“Okay. Fine- yeah. I could stay in Naboo for a few days.” You laugh slightly, smiling back at the girl in front of you.

“Okay, now go! Before we start crying again!” She shoos you off, breaking eye contact and walking away back towards her guards, who suddenly made an appearance at the edge of the platform. You felt yourself let out a breath you were unaware you were holding. She’s safe. 

You follow Anakin onto the ship's loading dock, turning around and making eye contact with Padme one last time before the ship closes, and she’s gone.

You let Anakin walk to the cockpit without you, taking a moment to sit on the floor and breathe for a second. Your mind is reeling, your heart pounding. It was all happening. In a few short hours, you would be on Mustafar, facing the past you thought you had escaped. As lovely as it was to see Padme, it didn’t help you at all. In fact, it only made you feel worse. You needed to get Obi-Wan back no matter what, but deep down, if something happened to you along the mission- it never concerned you. Padme made your willingness to sacrifice yourself much harder. You didn’t promise her verbally that you would return, but with the last look she gave you, you knew that’s what she wanted. She knew you far too well for your own good, and she knew you would try to do something morally righteous. She knew you’d try to be the hero.

Maybe Anakin did, too. Deep down, a part of you felt like he could see right through you. Like he knew you better than you knew yourself. And maybe he was lying about not asking Padme to come, knowing it would be the only thing that made you take yourself into consideration. The only thing that would prevent you from doing the ‘heroic’ thing. And as much as you hated yourself for it, you were thankful, even if he didn’t do it. You knew there was so much more to the relationship between you and Anakin, more than he even knew. But you suspected he knew that much, too. He knows there’s still more to the story. 

“Hey,” Speak of the Devil. 

“Oh- uh- Hey.” You awkwardly stand up to meet his gaze, wiping your wet eyes on your jacket sleeve. “I- uh- I should probably change.”

“Yeah,” he whispers, his intense eyes staring holes into you. You quickly turn to grab your bag and change in the nearest bathroom before a hand on your wrist stops you, his calloused fingers making your heart skip a beat. “Y/N, everything’s going to be okay.” You flash him a pathetic smile and a nod before running off. 

He frowns as you break away from him and bolt into the bathroom. Taking a deep breath, he wipes his hands on the front of his robes and shakes his head in annoyance. He just wanted to help. Why were you still being so difficult? How long was this going to take? He finally walked to the cockpit and sat in the pilot's chair, throwing his feet on the dash and closing his eyes. As much as he didn’t want them to, his thoughts wandered to you. He thought about the dress you wore, the muscles in your back it exposed, how you talked to your employees, and the gentleness you possessed when you fed him that soup. This was going to be a long trip. 

“What are you doing?” You cross your arms at the man before you, annoyed by his comfort. 

“Oh, fuck! You fucking scared me!” He jumps at your words, taking his feet off the dash and taking in your different look. His eyes scan your body thoroughly, and you feel yourself shift uncomfortably under his gaze. Although you knew you liked it. 

“Get out of my seat.” You sneer, and he raises a brow, leaning back into the seat further and letting out a loud, sarcastic laugh. You clench your fists at your side. He was clearly enjoying this.

“Your seat? That’s fucking rich. I’m piloting. End of story.”

“No, not end of story. It’s my fucking mission, so get the fuck out of my seat!” You snap at the man before you, pointing to the co-pilot's seat as you yell. 

“Your fucking mission? We’re saving my master. I’m leading the mission-” He stands up, getting in your face as he yells back. Your face turns red with anger. You were not putting up with his self-righteous chosen one shit right now. Not when so much was on the line.

“Anakin, you don’t know shit about what we’re doing here! How dangerous this is! Obi-Wan’s life is on the line, and I come back to you with your feet propped up on the controls fucking daydreaming! It’s my fucking mission. Drop it. Now.” You move closer, sticking a finger at his chest accusingly. He let out a laugh, rolling his eyes at you and smiling. 

“Y/N, you think you’re so fucking high and mighty because the Jedi sent you on a suicide mission to be a part of that fucking cult, and now Obi-Wan is gone, and now you feel guilty. Stop acting like you’re so much fucking better than me. I’m so sick of your fucking attitude. And why is this your fucking mission suddenly when you haven’t been a Jedi in years? I know about the Children of Nox- I’ve done the research, I’ve read the books-”

“And who do you think wrote the fucking books!” You yell in his face, feeling his hot breath on your nose. His smile had dropped, his eyes washed with guilt. You knew he wouldn’t admit that you were right, but his eyes told you everything they needed to. “Now sit the fuck down and get out of my fucking chair.”

“Okay, Y/N, you may be leading this mission, but I need to pilot. Please. It’s nothing against you, but I don’t feel comfortable with other people piloting. I have a thing- just- please.” His voice was soft, and desperate, his eyes searching yours for any sort of sympathy you could offer through your cold gaze. You sigh and shake your head, plopping into the co-pilot seat next to him, knowing he was undeserving of a verbal answer.

“Anyways,” You kick your feet on the dash as Anakin messes with some of the controls and lifts the ship into the atmosphere, punching on the hyperdrive. He throws a glare at you. “You may want to take a look at this, Anakin.” You pull up the most recent HoloNews feed about you, shoving it in his direction.

“Woah-Woah-Woah-Woah, What the fuck is this?” He rips it out of your hands, staring at the headline. ‘A forbidden love? Jedi Knight and General of the 501st Legion, Anakin Skywalker, makes first public appearance with ‘Like a Bantha!’ CDC, Y/N L/N. Could this be love?’ The picture showed you smiling and waving at the fans while his hand rested on your lower back, leading you into the restaurant. He only had eyes for you. Fuck. 

“Just fucking read it; I’ll explain in a second.” You search his eyes, unable to read the expression on his face. You attempt to reach out through the force and see him glance at you. Nothing. 

His eyes scanned the article, his brows furrowed in confusion. 

Even though the Jedi Order is known for forbidding their believers from any sort of attachment- romantic ones included- our dreamiest Jedi is seen behind CDC of ‘Like a Bantha!’ Y/N L/N into her own restaurant. Now, you may be thinking, how do we know they’re together? Maybe he’s just a bodyguard? Well, readers of Galatic Gossip Magazine, the GGM has yet to let you down!

As you can see from our clearly dissected photo, his hand on her lower back, the smile on her face, and the crease in his brow as he looks at her says it all. Our Jedi is clearly smitten. And our Chef is clearly in love. And everyone knows L/N wouldn’t do anything like this publicly without a reason. It has to be a relationship. There’s no question about it! Listen, in a few weeks, when we see them kissing in a public place, and I come back to write a follow-up, don’t say I didn’t tell you so! But now the main question is… how is Skywalker getting away with this? If we know, then the rest of the order has to know. Are they okay with their chosen one being romantically involved with another? And what does this mean for the rest of the Jedi? This controversy raises many questions about the Jedi and what they stand for. If you have any thoughts or questions you’d like to add, click the link below! And don’t forget to subscribe and tune in next week!

“I-I don’t understand. This feels bad.” He hands back the device as he gulps, feeling suddenly uneasy about his reputation as a Jedi. 

“No, Anakin.” You lean forward with a smile, resting your hand on his knee to comfort him. “This is good. This sends a message to the Children of Nox. We know each other—we know the truth. And clearly, the rest of the galaxy knows something is up, too. They should fear us—they need to fear us, especially when all eyes are on us.” You gently squeeze his knee before leaning back in your chair and closing your eyes. 

“I think I get it. Even though they know we know each other, fear is our most powerful ally.” He mumbles to himself, biting his lip in thought.

“Exactly. Now, what do you know about Mustafar?” You giggle, enjoying his nervousness about the news. For some odd reason, the idea of the galaxy thinking you were a couple didn’t necessarily bother you. 

“Well, I know it’s located in the outer rim and is pretty much uninhabitable, as it’s a lava planet. It’s a mining planet overrun with all sorts of crime- pretty sure it serves as the headquarters of Black Sun as well as the Children of Nox. However, I do remember one of your books saying that Crimson Dawn often fought over territory on the planet.” You quirk a brow at his knowledge, a satisfied grin painting your face with the credit he gave you.

“Wow, I’m impressed, Skywalker.” You leaned forward, adjusting some of the controls on the ship, “You’re very knowledgeable. I appreciate that. Would be a shame if only one of us had a brain.” You shot him a wink and a smile, to which he reciprocated. 

“It’s all thanks to you, Naberrie.” He mused, and you smiled softly to yourself at the use of your real last name. How you miss being called that.

“Now, like you said- it’s an outer rim planet. And it’s all fucking lava. Not only do we need to be careful about not burning to death, but there are pirates everywhere. And who knows what crime syndicates have been there since the last time I was there?” You turned your chair to face him, and he automatically mimicked your actions, his brow creased in concentration, “We need to land around 17 klicks away, so it’ll take around half a day to get to the fortress.” 

You open a projector and map out the new waypoint for you both. Anakin follows your painted fingers carefully as you show him where you need to land and what direction you need to hike in. 

“There’s a cave in this area; it would be best if we landed there. In the case of pirates, syndicates, and the cult- this conceals us the most. When we arrive at the fortress, there’s a series of ventilation that we can take in. They used to be under construction for a long time, but hopefully, they’re functional. That should block out most of the noise. I scouted the ventilation system for a long time when I was there in case something happened, and I needed to make a quick exit. Regardless, if we follow a certain path, it’ll take us across to one of many control rooms. We exit the vents- knock out some guards- and there’s our disguises. They should have a keycard to the control room where we can slice the computers and access the data on where Master Kenobi is being held. We could also disable the cameras and alarms, and we might as well- Wait- Are you getting all of this?” You break your stare at the projection to see Anakin wholly spaced out, looking at you. 

“Oh- uh- yeah, of course. Keep talking, I’m listening.” Anakin stutters out awkwardly, feeling the energy shift between the two of you. He makes a bold move and places his hand on yours, giving it a light squeeze. You freeze. He smiles. 

“O-oh- Uh- okay, well, then you and I make our way to their cell block with the information about where Kenobi is being held. We break him out- but keep our disguises up. It’s crucial we act like this is standard- even to Kenobi. The Children of Nox are smart- too smart- and we can’t risk any slip-ups- especially when we have Kenobi. I’m not sure at what point it will be best to reveal our identities to him, but I’m sure he’ll catch on. We leave the same way we came in, making sure to avoid detection the entire time.”

“Sounds easy enough.” Anakin grins, gripping your hand tighter with his gloved one and leaning back into his seat, letting his eyes rest for a moment before you land. 

“Yes- it does. But there is one thing that will make this extremely difficult-”

“And that is?” He opens one eye at you, his eyebrows raised. 

“They’re all force users. We have to conceal our force signatures as best as we can in order to remain undetected. We can use the force minimally- but nothing crazy. The higher-ups will suspect something just with us in proximity to the Temple- but that’s just general unease. We have to be careful about this, Anakin. There’s so much at stake and-”

“Hey,” He gives your hand another gentle squeeze, his brows furrowed in concern as he feels your heart rate rising. He doesn’t know how he can detect it- but his force sensitivity is significantly acute when he is near you. “We’re gonna make it. He’s gonna be okay.”

“A-Anakin, shouldn’t I be comforting you? He was your Master, after all. I-It’s okay, you don’t need to do this, Ani.” You trail off into a whisper, breaking eye contact. His hand doesn’t falter it’s grip on yours. 

“This isn’t your fault, Y/N. I know you feel like it is. And I’m sorry I used that against you- you don’t deserve that. Y-You don’t deserve any of this.” He grabs and holds your hand with both of his, those blue eyes searing into your soul. But with those words leaving Anakin’s lips- you do the unspeakable. You hug him. 

You throw yourself into his lap and wrap your arms around his neck- not saying a word. He can feel your body shake slightly above him, and you can both feel each other’s increased heart rates. He wraps his cloak around your body while his gloved hand snakes itself around your waist, pulling you closer into him while his other one finds its way to your scalp, massaging your head against his chest. You lay there momentarily, closing your eyes and taking in his warmth. He smelled good- too good. And shockingly- you were so comfortable there with him. A small part of you didn’t want to leave. You didn’t want it to end. And with the beep of the dashboard, it did. 

The second the ship notified you both that you entered the Mustafar system, you jumped off of his lap and into your own chair so fast. You both cleared your throats and avoided eye contact- clearly not wanting to discuss the intimate moment you just had. Were you weak? Just giving in to your unfairly attractive enemy like that? Probably. But did you like it? Yes. 

“Do- Uh- Do you mind punching in those landing coordinates for me, Chef?” He attempted to mask his nervousness with a nickname. Even though you smiled, you saw right through him. 

“Of course,” You mumble, quickly typing in where you need to go onto the ship's navigation system. He watched as your fingers moved, another smile teasing its way onto his lips. 

You were both silent during the landing sequence into the cave- the air thick with tension for what was to come. To say you were nervous was an understatement- you were fucking terrified. There was so much that could go wrong and so quickly. He opens the door, and you’re instantly hit by the smell of smoke. You carefully step out of the ship, blaster out and ready to fire as you survey your surroundings. Anakin quickly discarded his cloak, leaving it behind on the ship as the door closed. 

“Fuck, This sucks already.” You squeeze your eyes shut, the smoke instantly making them water as Anakin giggles at you. 

“Okay, Princess, didn’t realize you couldn’t handle a little smoke.” He muses, and you glare at him, ignoring the heat rising to your cheeks with the nickname. 

“Shut up. Let’s start walking.” You walk away from him as you pull up the map on your navigator, giving you the best directions to the coordinates of the Temple. You hear a slight ‘aye aye, captain’ from behind you and roll your eyes as your lips curve into a smile. 

“So you’re just a chef at some restaurant? Didn’t realize just a chef would end up on the front page of the galaxy’s hottest gossip magazine…” He teases, and you roll your eyes, gently kicking rocks along the path.

“It’s only cause of you, Skywalker.” You toy, and suddenly, it’s his turn to roll his eyes.

“Now you can’t possibly think-”

“Of course, I don’t think that.” You turn to look at him, placing your hands on your hips, and he smirks. “I know my status. I earned it.”  

“Oh?” He raises a brow, “How so? I’m beginning to realize I don’t know much about you, Chef.”

“Well, what exactly do you want to know?” You start walking again, avoiding his lingering gaze on your figure. The heat rose to your cheeks, and you became slightly apprehensive. What the fuck.

“Tell me everything. We have a long walk ahead of us, y’know. And I find it fascinating that you are more famous than I realize.”  

“Well, okay. I’ve loved cooking and eating for as long as I can remember. When I was a youngling, I was always excited to be sent out on missions with the hopes that I could try some of the local foods and customs, as well as being just exposed to their cultures. I just loved seeing different things that we weren’t used to as a Jedi, yknow? My master would even let me bring some ingredients home if we could, and I would figure out something to cook. I honestly don’t know where the creativity or my ideas came from- they just sorta happened. The Order was kind enough to let me visit with my family for a long time- I often took holidays in Naboo, and I learned to cook from my mother and sisters, as well as enjoyed their- our native foods and cultures. I also took a bunch of missions there, so I really got to know the planet.”

“Oh yeah, the food was terrific on Naboo. I noticed how much of your restaurant was inspired by it. It’s really cool. But how did you even become a famous Chef? You’re so young…” Anakin trails off in thought, trying not to offend you, and you laugh. 

“I’m getting to that, Skywalker. And actually- the entirety of my restaurant is inspired by Naboo. It was the little piece of home I had away from home. Anyway, after I left the order, I lived with Eric for a long time, doing a bunch of random freelance work. But all of my time and money went to cooking, traveling, and eating. I somehow managed to befriend a lot of Chefs, and over time, they took me under their wing. I became really popular in the community, and they were all impressed with my knowledge and skillset despite never going to culinary school. I have this thing about flavors, and somehow, the skills have always come to me so easily. I don’t know why or how- but it’s helped me thrive ever since. Eventually, I made enough money to open “Like a Bantha!” which did insanely well and put me on the map. The only reason I’m so fucking famous is because I’m an ex-Jedi who’s never been to culinary school and has the insane culinary talent of someone who’s been cooking for 50 years. And it’s beyond just me- the Force has something to do with it. Cooking is my passion- I thought I was the chosen one of that, not this. And Anakin, I feel like I’ve accomplished far more and have done far more good for the galaxy with “Like a Bantha!” than I ever could as a Jedi. I’ve given so many people new opportunities and experiences… It’s what I’ve always dreamed of. I thought being a Jedi would fulfill that purpose- that longing. But it never did.” 

You stop rambling and gaze at Anakin, noticing he has a particular unrecognizable gaze towards you. Admiration, maybe? You weren’t sure.  

“Wow- uh- That’s-um, That’s really impressive, Y/N.” He stutters out, and you feel almost shameful.

“I-I I’m sorry, Anakin, I shouldn’t have-”

“NO, please. I loved hearing about it. I’m almost jealous. No need to apologize. I just wasn’t sure how to respond. Now I am. It’s incredible that despite everything, you built yourself back up and made a name for yourself in such an iconic way. I’m really impressed.” He flashes you a smile, and you find yourself becoming a little more fond of the Jedi next to you. “Tell me about your staff. You all seem pretty close.”

“Ha, yeah, that we are. I feel like I raised all of them despite a lot of us being the same age or most of them being older, actually. I probably shouldn’t say this, but Cora’s my favorite. She came in freshly out of culinary school and was so intimidated but so excited to learn. Something about her... I just felt so inclined to help her. To make her grow. I’ve taught her everything I know and some more. I’m still teaching her. She’s teaching me, too, actually. She’s probably a year younger than me, but she’s so fucking smart and talented. I’m so proud of her every day. I feel like her big sister. And I’ve spent so much time with her. I know her friends and family; I’ve cared for them and helped them when I could. I mean, just recently, I paid around 7,000 credits for her Lothcat to have surgery after a bad accident. I left the restaurant with her, knowing she’d take care of it. She loves the place as much as I do. If I ever left it, I’d leave it with her. She deserves it.”

“And what about Luca?” He avoids eye contact, but you raise a brow at his question and laugh.

“Luca is Luca. He’s almost as good as Cora but still young and so reckless. He’s also way too fucking horny for his own good. He’s hit on me so many times it’s hilarious. I never entertain it, but I do find it amusing. I just let him talk himself into a hole, and he always stops. It’s become more of an inside joke than anything. He’s also in charge, despite his attitude and lack of maturity, he has an amazing talent and is immensely passionate about the place. He’s gonna do great things one day, especially when he stops thinking with his dick.” You both laugh, and you notice his shoulders drop, the tension easing on him. Was Anakin Skywalker becoming comfortable around you? 

“Ah, I see. Thought maybe something was going on there. You’ve seen the way he looks at you?” He jokes.

“No, no,” You giggle, “There’s nothing going on there, as much as he hates it. And yes, I’ve seen the way he looks at me- it’s purely lustful. Besides, I haven’t had anything romantic happen ever, and fucking Eric was the last person I slept with, and that was a fucking mess. I’d rather not rehash that. Besides, virgin Jedi boy, what’s it matter to you?” 

“It doesn’t- was just curious. And believe me- I’ve had my fair share of fun. It’s not very ‘Jedi-like,’ but again, I never really have been.” You raise a brow.

‘Makes sense. You always were trouble-”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Oh, come on, Anakin,” You nudge him slightly, “Don’t act like the entire order didn’t hear about it when their beloved ‘Chosen one’ would act up! Gossip spreads faster in the Jedi Temple than it does on GGM.” 

“I- Touche.” 

You both fell into a comfortable silence, and the walk was amicable despite the circumstances. You took your time taking in your surroundings, most of which you only saw during a window when you were a part of the Children of Nox. Although the mission was critical, you were grateful you got an opportunity to see Mustafar for yourself, not locked inside. There were so many mountains and valleys where you walked, you couldn’t help but feel uneasy. Anyone could pop out. And they did. 

The second you felt a trigger being pulled- before the shot was even fired- you pulled Anakin behind some rocks, cutting your thigh open in the process. 

“Ah, Fuck!” You shouted, grasping your thigh and putting pressure on it as Anakin fired your blaster back.

“Y/N, are you hurt? What’s wrong?” He ducked beneath the rock, allowing the blaster to cool off while he attempted to inspect your knee, only to be pushed away by you. 

“Just focus on shooting! Fucking bandits.” You trail off to yourself as Anakin fires at them, the noise growing unbearable to you. You had to make it out of this. This was not part of the plan. You ripped off the bottom of your shirt, wrapping it around your clothed thigh, hoping to stop the bleeding. You ignite your lightsaber, the yellow hue contrasting beautifully with your surroundings while you stand up and reflect the shots back to the bandits. 

“Y/N!! What the fuck are you doing!” Anakin throws the blaster to the side, igniting his own lightsaber and jumping over the rock, hitting a few bandits with their own blasts. 

“Ending this. We don’t have fucking time for this!” You yell back as you slice through the last of the bandits with your yellow saber, ending the fight. You exhale and wipe the sweat off your forehead as you shut off your lightsaber and clip it back to your belt.

“Hey,” Anakin yells towards you, gaining your attention from the slaughter you both just committed, “Check these out.”

You turn around to meet Anakin’s eyes as he leans against 2 perfectly good speeders the bandits had graciously left you. Well, they didn’t have much of a choice.

“Holy shit!” You yell back, running over to meet him as you inspect the speeders. He instantly smiled at your reaction. “These will get us there in no time!”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

Let me know if you want to be tagged for this series or all fics <3

[yanderes-galore]

I just finished the clone wars now I’m curious how would Yandere platonic anakin react if his friend he knew fromHis Padawan days , left the order ?

I'm not done with the Clone Wars series so sorry if you imagined this taking place at the end of that series- but I have seen the first two prequels which were his Padawan days. I hope what I have down will work :) Sorry this took months to make- I kept it a bit general so there isn't many spoilers for the series.

If things are too OOC, tell me how to improve as I am really new to Star Wars! I'm sorry if I trigger the Star Wars fandom with my lack of knowledge :(.

Yandere! Platonic! Anakin Skywalker with Darling who leaves the order

Pairing: Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Violence, Desperate yandere, Mutual friendship turned forced, Overprotective yandere, Displays of Anakin's corruption, Manipulation, Murder.

For this concept the identity of your Master doesn't really matter.

All that really matters is they probably knew either Qui-Gon Jinn or Obi-Wan Kenobi.

This way you would've met Anakin Skywalker at some point.

Anakin is a very emotionally driven yandere.

In fact this is why he goes to the dark side as Vader eventually.

He tends to get too connected to people, which makes him a danger to others.

Ahsoka, his Padawan, and Padmé, his girlfriend/wife are good examples of this.

Personal connections are forbidden within Jedi.

That never really stopped Anakin from forming close connections, however.

In this concept you are another example of Anakin's emotions driving him.

The friendship between you both is really close.

Your Master was allies and maybe even close friends with his.

As a result you had become well acquainted with Anakin.

While Anakin held romantic feelings for Padmé as a Padawan, he felt he could let loose around you.

Anakin never liked the uptight rules of being a Jedi.

He didn't like it due to many reasons, such as the restrictions on relationships and just... angsty teen reasons.

You two met in your teens and while your Master got along with his, your Master felt Anakin would corrupt you somehow.

You were always warned to not take on Anakin's behavior as your own.

Yet you were more concerned with just relaxing and training with your fellow Padawan.

As with all of his close relationships, Anakin was always very protective over you.

Even during training he didn't entirely like he idea of going all out on you.

Although when you ask for it he relents just so he can say he 'told you so' .

You two share such a strong bond.

Nothing romantic, just one of best friends, maybe even siblings despite you not being related.

Both your Master and his thought your fate with him was intertwined with his...

Yet they dreaded the fact they weren't quite sure how.

Training with Anakin in your Padawan days made you both skilled Jedi.

By the time of the Clone Wars you had matured similar to him.

It surprised you when you learned Anakin had taken in a Padawan, Ahsoka.

You tease him about it sometimes, which causes Anakin to playfully swat at you to stop.

When Ahsoka asks about you Anakin reminisces about your Padawan days with each other and explains you are a friend.

A friend he doesn't think he could live without.

Then there's that fabled day.

The day Anakin got one of the most devastating pieces of news he'd think he'd hear as a Jedi.

You, his closest friend, wanted to leave the Jedi Order.

As the Clone Wars continued on... you decided to rethink your decision.

Your master had passed in battle and you felt a bit alone.

Sure, Anakin was still part of the Order and you could function on your own without your Master... but that wasn't the only issue.

There's reasons and ways a Jedi can quit the Order.

It's not like you can just ask to leave, however.

You are a young Jedi with no wounds that affect your combat ability.

Maybe you had differing beliefs from the Council and Order?

Maybe you had personal connections of your own like Anakin and wanted to leave to pursue those....

Either way you most likely want to go rogue or something and turn your back on your duty.

Something Anakin doesn't approve of, for selfish reasons.

He tries to talk you out of it.

He meets up with you and accuses you.

He admits he loves Padmé to you in private but keeps it secret. If you loved someone too then he suggests doing the same!

He even accuses you of abandoning him.

Does he not matter that much to you!?

He's your best friend! He cares for you!

Yet you want to abandon him your duty?

All of these words are hypocritical and you can sense it.

You two most likely argue heavily, causing your friendship to rift.

In fact, maybe you leaving the order is one of the factors that pushes him to the Dark Side due to his emotions.

He begins to blame you when you leave and go into hiding.

Anakin doesn't understand why you left at first.

Although part of him begins to when he starts giving more and more into the darkness within him.

Anakin may even begin to blame the Council and Order itself for you leaving.

Perhaps even the Republic, too

Ahsoka notices her master has a change in behavior after you left.

He's even more moody than usual.

He's... vulnerable, too.

Ahsoka notices he's trying to be stoic yet feels sad.

Devastated, actually.

Padmé no doubt tries to help Anakin through it.

He's worried for you.

When you were in the Order he was confident he could watch over you.

Now he's sent into a state of constant worry as he can't sense you.

How far out did you go?

After you left the Order you most likely don't meet Anakin for a long time.

He makes it a goal to find you again.

Maybe you meet him when he was still known as Anakin, he can sense you with the Force if he manages to get close to your location.

When he senses you with the Force then he no doubt hunts you down, abandoning any mission he was sent on.

It would be by chance but if he does meet you still as Anakin then he clings to you.

He missed you... he's always missed you.

He wants you to come back with him where he can keep you safe, you refuse.

He doesn't care how long it takes... he's going to try and coax you to stay by him once again.

You're supposed to support each other!

Ever since your Padawan days you've been by his side with a smile.

Why not now?

WHY do you fight him?

Why is he only able to take you with him after he's beaten you in a duel?

Why do you treat him as a monster... he's your friend!

A friend who refuses to leave you alone when you don't wish to be found.

If you had a family of your own there's no doubt Anakin would slaughter them.

He's corrupt and clearly has it in him to kill as he's done so before due to his rage.

After all, your family took you from him.

With them gone, you have no choice but to come with him.

Ahsoka's left horrified when she finds out what he's done.

Anakin doesn't care.

Now it can be just like old times between you.

Then there's if you meet him much later, when he's Vader.

Jedi are his enemy, yet when he meets you all alone...

He remembers you.

He knows you most likely aren't part of any side in this new war, since you left you aren't evil.

He actually praises you for leaving the Republic at least, maybe you knew something he did not?

He doesn't kill you, he spares you.

When you ask why... he says it in the best way he can.

"It's me... Anakin."

No matter how you cross paths again, be it with Anakin or Vader, his goal still stands.

He's found you...

He won't let you ever abandon him again, even if it costs you your life.

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

hiiii! congratulations on your milestone!! i love your blog <3

for jukebox roulette, the song kiss & tell by idkhow is one of my favorites of all time and gives me major obi-wan feelings. maybe a lil fic for him? :) thank you, love u

Hiiiiii! my lovely @creatureoftheunderworldd

Thank you so much for loving the blog.

I hope I did your song justice. I have never heard of this song or this group, and thank you so much for introducing them! I LOVE THEM!

I hope you love this. It's a prequel to How Long Will I Love You?

Love oo

Kiss & Tell

Warnings: heartbreak, unrequited love, dealing with feelings, sneaking out, I think that's it, if I miss anything please let me know.

Main Master List   | Star Wars Jukebox Roulette |   AO3 Link

Qui-gon spent all morning looking for you, and when he finally found you in the archives, your nose buried in a book, he sat in front of you, pulling the book away as he locked eyes with you.

“I didn’t do it, I swear Master. It was already broken.”

“No, that’s not … wait, what was already broken?” Qui-gon furrowed his eyebrows.

“Whatever was broken before I touched it … Master Qui-gon!” I realized who it was once I actually focused on his face. “Master, you’re back! I heard you were helping out Mandalore!”

Qui-gon simply chuckled as he shook his head, “Yes, my dear. You’re right, but…”

“How was it? Tell me everything? Are Mandalorians really as strong as they say? I heard that they have jet packs, live in their armour all the time, and they even sleep in it. Is that true? Did you get to try one?”

“Padawan!”

You clammed up, he’d only shout padawan when you were in trouble.

“Please, listen.”

“Sorry, Master”

He let out a sigh, slowly his smile etched back on his face, “You’re always a special one, my dear.”

You shrugged, “It’s called being young.”

“Don’t get too comfortable, age has a way of creeping up on you. Today, you’re 19, tomorrow you’re nearing 50.”

“Well that’s a bright and cheery thought. How can I help you, Master Qui-gon?”

“It’s Obi-wan.”

Your smile faltered as you thought about your best friend, “Is he okay? 

“No. He had his first lesson in heartbreak.”

For a reason you would rather choose to ignore, there was a pain in your heart, as it wrapped around and squeezed tight. You took in a sharp breath, “I’m sorry to hear that.” Your voice sounded flat even to you. 

“As his oldest friend, I am hoping you can be a shoulder to cry for him, as he will not talk to me.”

You rubbed your forehead nodding, “Alright, Master Qui-gon, where is he?”

“Where else, but the reflecting pool.”

“But, of course.” You smiled and stood heading towards the reflecting pool. It wasn’t the first time Obi-wan hid himself in the reflecting pool. It usually happened when something significant affected his life, or when he got in trouble after he rebelled. You smiled as you found him underneath his favourite tree, his eyes closed as he meditated.

You gently lowered yourself, fluttering your robe out behind you, as you sat beside him. 

Silence filled the space between you two as you simply stared ahead, watching the ripples in the pool. 

“You really not going to say anything?” Obi finally uttered.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

“Then why should I say anything?”

He let out a sigh, as he opened his eyes, “It’s not fair!”

“No, it’s not.”

“She could’ve asked me to stay.”

You nodded in agreement.

“I should’ve offered to stay.”

“That was another path you could’ve taken.”

“Why didn’t she say anything!”

You turned to look at him, locking eyes with you, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

He groaned as he flopped back against the grass beneath the both of you.

“Come on, you can answer it. Why did you say anything?” You shifted lying beside him as you looked up at the overgrowth from the tree.

“Because I didn’t want to walk away from the Jedi.”

“So … why do you think she didn’t say anything?”

“Probably because she knew I wouldn’t have been able to make the decision”

You nodded in agreement, “Yup, she probably did.” You let out a sigh as you stretched, placing your hands underneath your head, this wasn’t a conversation you really wanted to have with him. You didn’t want to know about him falling in love with someone else. You didn’t want to be the one that had to sit here and help his broken heart, knowing he’d never look at you the same way. 

“Obi, falling in love is not horrendous,” you shifted your head so you could look at him, “Having emotions isn’t the worst thing to happen. Just know that you’ll be able to help your own padawan someday when they’re head over heels in love.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“I do. You have an exceptional mind, and when you’re not being a rebellious idiot, you’re quite mature. Take this time to heal from the pain, knowing I’ll be here to help.” You shifted sitting up as you turned to glance at him, “Any time you wanna talk about her, I’ll be here to listen. Okay?”

There was a soft smile on his face as he sat up too, looking at you, “Thanks, my dear,” he pressed a kiss to your cheek, “for being there for me.”

“You’re welcome. Now do you wanna mope some more or …” you smiled, with mischief glinting in your eyes. 

“Or?”

“Or do you wanna sneak out of the temple for old times sake, hit Dex’s Diner, and then hop the transport ships heading down to the lower levels? See how many jumps we can do from one transport to the next without having to stop for more than five minutes?”

“You’re on.”

You chuckled as you stood heading towards the lower level entrance that no one ever used. Even though it’s not what you would’ve hoped for, any time you got to spend with Obi-wan was a lot better than spending time by yourself in the Archives.

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[weepylucifer]

okay here it is. i hinted at this one time in the tags of some reblog that probably no one noticed. but trust it has been on my mind. my AU with force-sensitive clones

so the kaminoans would probably want very hard to have everyone believe that clones can never have the force, and that is what they do tell everyone. bc they love to pretend that clones are little more than very adaptable flesh droids, and force sensitivity is a benchmark of sentience, and with the way the jedi make such a huge fuss abt it, they know that if they found clones to be strong in the force, they would get difficult about it and perhaps even about the whole war. so they spread the word around that clones cannot be force-sensitive at all ever, and most clones probably don't have any reason to question this

of course there are outliers bc clearly clones are people and can have the force like anyone else. we all know about clone trooper glitch. (in my opinion someone should also find a force-sensitive droid somewhere and let's see what happens THEN). but they'd be weeded out by the kaminoans before they can do anything with their abilities, and so word gets around the GAR that if you are the kind of trooper who makes things float sometimes, keep that shit to yourself or else. but most clones who are not strong in the force and don't have any brothers around them who are would likely never even consider this

okay this is our set-up

our focal character will be cody bc he's my favorite. i think if cody had the force he wouldn't notice. i love him but he's not the QUICKEST of all clones at questioning what the people in charge tell him. so he just wouldn't think about it. maybe obi-wan catches glimpses of something going on but, you know, these guys have SO much on their plates, they are fighting a war here. plus obi-wan might just go "of course i feel like cody's special somehow. it's attraction" and just brush it off as symptoms of codywan. maybe he considers looking into it but he never gets the time and then order 66 happens

so the force and the evil mind control chip do violent battle in cody's brain and he manages to snap out of it, but unfortunately too late. they've already shot obi-wan off the cliff, and cody has reason to assume he's dead now. everywhere jedi are dying. you know the drill

desperately, cody, for the first time in his life and purely on instinct, reaches into the force to somehow make things right. more than half mad with terror, as he is overpowered the way he's never been before by grief and rage and fear and suffering and horror and rage and guilt and rage and rage and rage, what he connects with, completely by accident, is actually, you guessed it, the dark side

the shit show began years ago when the clone war started, or perhaps the shitshow began even earlier, when sidious fell. but here is where the shitshow continues

[ahsoka-in-a-hood]

Obi Wan is capable of being kind of a bitch but also quite gentle and polite and for reasons I was thinking about when and why he gets like that-

for example in TPM he's often snarky with Qui Gon though he obviously loves him, and one thing that sticks out is that while he is clearly frustrated with Quin Gon's handling of Anakin and expresses that directly to him, he's always nice to Anakin. I'd venture that part of his irritation does stem from him feeling this isn't really fair to Anakin either- making him promises about training him even though he doesn't really meet the criteria and might not be accepted, for reasons he basically agrees with

In Aotc he gets caustic with Anakin, but it's generally again when he's done something that really irritated him- undermining him publicly, ignoring his instructions, going off on his own, putting himself and Padme in danger- but he's not mean for the sake of being mean. He's visibly embarrassed by Anakin's bad flirting but he doesn't make fun of him, and even reassures him that Padme was happy to see them. To me he's very gentle in that scene when he approaches Anakin about his dreams, and in RotS when he says goodbye before utapau- they were disagreeing a minute ago, and again obi wan was embarrassed by his behaviour with the council, but he takes the time to say goodbye properly and tell him he cares and he's proud of him. Unless this is literally the first time they've been separated during the war (and in TCW it is decidedly not) that can't be a parting that hasn't happened before.

I don't recall him ever being short with Yoda. I know some would interpret that as him being too deferential to authority (with Qui Gon being his own category I suppose) but... well, I think they're at least a little closer than that, but also we didn't really see them disagree- except I suppose when Obi Wan insisted on training Anakin, but even then Obi Wan was on his side before Qui Gon's last words, so that feels different to me. But it doesn't feel beyond me that he could feel provoked to rudeness with the council, or other authority figures for that matter.

And then there is Satine, who he is professional with for approximately five minutes before descending into rudeness

In conclusion: he is generally polite, and he's not exactly mean, but he's irritable and only professional up to a point, and then he can get bitchy.

(bonus: we never saw him bitchy with his troops, and I'd say it would take a certain degree of familiarity before that occurred, and that it's nigh impossible that they never ever got on his nerves, so it probably did happen at some point over three years.)

[grapenehifics]

WIP Wednesday

I'm going to start posting an Obikin Jurassic Park AU later this week, but in the meantime, here's a sneak peek of chapter 3!

“That was so cool!” Luke enthused, jumping up and down, the same way he had ever since he’d seen the helicopter on the landing pad at the San José airport. “Dad! Dad! Dad! Did you feel how fast we dropped? We went like – whoosh – and then like, like – whoosh – again” –

“What did you think, Leia?” Anakin asked, turning his attention to his daughter. She was holding his hand, but was being much quieter than her brother, which was not her custom.

“Do we have to ride it again when we go home?” she asked, looking up at him.

Anakin nodded. “To get back to the airport, yeah.”

She squeezed his hand a little tighter. “And then we’re going to fly back home to Grandma, and you have to go back to work, huh?”

Luke was busy pretending he was a helicopter, so Anakin momentarily had both hands free to scoop Leia up and into his arms. She was getting just a little too tall to be carried, and her legs dangled somewhere around his knees, but she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tight. “Yes, but let’s not think about that right now, all right?” Anakin murmured, and Leia nodded. “We get to have fun together all weekend first!”

Luke finally noticed no one was paying him any attention. “Dad,” he tried again, tugging on Anakin’s sleeve. “Who’re they?”

Anakin looked up. Dooku’s guys had picked them up at the airport, flown them here on the first helicopter ride any of them had ever been on, then put them in a Jeep and driven them to some sort of squat concrete building very much still under construction, and Anakin had been so busy enjoying seeing his kids for the first time in weeks that it had all passed as a sort of blur, but now, standing in the lobby of a large circular rotunda, the truth hit him like a ton of bricks.

Obi-Wan was here. Obi-Wan was about to meet Anakin’s kids. Dooku was here, too, and Anakin’s kids were about to meet Count Dooku, and they’d probably make a terrible impression, because they were ten, and neither Obi-Wan nor Dooku but especially Dooku seemed like men who suffered ten-year-olds lightly. Anakin had put ten years of work into protecting his family and his career both, and this one weekend had the power to bring the entire house of cards tumbling down.

If Anakin were a smarter man, he never would have mentioned his kids at all. Neither Obi-Wan nor Dooku would have known the difference. Nor would Luke or Leia. He might have missed his weekly Sunday check-in call, but he could have found some reason to explain why he needed to reschedule that. Costa Rica would have just been this weird blip in his summer that he didn’t tell his kids about. But no. He’d just been missing them so badly, and Dooku had mentioned kids, and Anakin had made that dumb joke, and the twins were on his brain, and the words had just come tumbling out, and Dooku, for some weird reason, had gone for it, and now here Anakin was, one ten-year-old dangling from his neck and the other making zoom-zoom noises with his mouth, standing in front of Doctor Obi-Wan Kenobi, full-time paleontology god and part-time secret love of Anakin’s life.

[antianakin]

Didn’t get a picture but I saw someone on the internet claiming that

a. Ahsoka, unlike Obi-Wan, was actually good enough at combat to defeat Anakin properly at Mustafar and should have gone instead. (and just that she’s the best at combat out of all the Jedi or something along those lines) b. because of her training and goddess-ness it means she’s the Most Powerful Jedi now. I feel like your blog is a good safe space to express my complete annoyance with everything going on here. why. Why. I am so tired of this (and all the anti-Jedi people in the fandom as well.)

and also, I love all your analyses on Star Wars and they always brighten my day! Thank you!

Lollllll this is a VERY safe space to express annoyance at these takes.

For one, Ahsoka literally DOES go up against Anakin and she FAILS. Anakin punts her off the side of a cliff (it's technically a battlestation but they're very high up so whatever, I'm calling it a cliff) and she only manages to snag off a piece of his mask because she runs up behind him while he's distracted with Kanan and Ezra rather than because she's genuinely able to overpower him through skill alone. She gets LUCKY.

People seem to forget that Ahsoka does NOT recognize that he's Anakin for the beginning part of that fight on Malachor. Like technically, deep down, she probably DOES know, but she's convinced herself it isn't true and Anakin confirms that at the beginning by saying he's the one who destroyed Anakin, so Ahsoka can just... go at him with everything she's got with zero conflict at all. There is literally NOTHING holding her back here, this is Ahsoka at FULL FORCE and she fails pretty epically.

She doesn't really do any better once she DOES know it's Anakin because she's immediately refusing to go on the offensive at all, she's JUST defensive because she doesn't WANT to kill Anakin. And more than that, she REFUSES to kill Anakin. She feels guilty for what's happened to him because she's decided that it's her fault for having left him behind. That's the whole arc she's gone on in Rebels, it's why her line to him once she can't deny that it's Anakin anymore is "I won't leave you. Not this time." That's not the kind of thing you say to someone you're prepared to defeat and/or kill. Ahsoka is prepared to DIE here because she'd rather die than abandon Anakin a second time and killing him would ABSOLUTELY be counted in that category for Ahsoka.

So not only is she just not competent enough to have beaten Anakin, I don't think it's reasonable to argue she would've even WANTED to. If Ahsoka had been on Mustafar, Anakin probably would've killed her, and then he would've been able to capture Padme and the twins and who knows what he would've done if he'd been able to do that.

And even within the Ahsoka show, she goes up against Baylan more than once and loses EACH TIME. Baylan literally tells her that she CAN'T beat him. She just isn't good enough. And this is a FILONI-RUN SHOW, there are zero other writers on this show, so if Baylan is telling Ahsoka that she isn't good enough to beat him, then presumably Filoni himself believes that that's true, at least for now. I imagine that she WILL beat him eventually, but it may end up similar to her win in season 1 where she's relying on distractions from other people or assistance or something. Who knows. But either way, she can't even beat a regular Jedi like Baylan, so how the fuck is she supposed to have beaten a major powerhouse like ANAKIN when he would've been hell bent on her death and destruction?

Obi-Wan DOES defeat Anakin properly on Mustafar, he just can't full-on kill him because the narrative sort-of requires Anakin to survive. He does LEAVE Anakin to die, though, and if Yoda had succeeded against Palpatine, Anakin WOULD'VE died. Obi-Wan CHOPS OFF THREE OF ANAKIN'S LIMBS AND LEAVES ANAKIN TO BURN ALIVE, I'm not sure how much more properly defeated it is possible to get.

Also, the reason Obi-Wan defeats Anakin is almost never due to power levels. It's a combination of being centered/balanced in the Force and knowing Anakin so well that he can predict his moves extremely well. His win in ROTS on Mustafar isn't because Obi-Wan happened to be more powerful than Anakin, he's not. He just is aware enough of his surroundings to take advantage of an opportunity when he sees it and lasts long enough to be able to find it. The stunt choreographers also have explicitly stated that they intentionally choreographed this fight sequence with Obi-Wan consistently GIVING GROUND to Anakin in an attempt to give Anakin time to calm down and come to his senses. So not only is he just good enough to take advantage of an opportunity when he sees it, he's good enough to hold BACK for a while and still live through the fight. And if he's explicitly holding back in the fight, it means that there's even more power he could've been exerting and it's entirely possible that he might've been able to end the entire fight much earlier had he chosen to do so. There's never any kind of indication that that's true for Ahsoka during her one fight against him. She doesn't let herself get tossed off a cliff on purpose lol.

And of course in the Kenobi show, Obi-Wan wins in the flashback scene due to being SMARTER, not more powerful. In the final confrontation he wins because he's more BALANCED and is more willing to put everything he's got into his attacks and changes up his fighting style so he can take Anakin by surprise, so when he slashes off a piece of his helmet, it's not just because Anakin was distracted, it's because Obi-Wan genuinely fought Anakin down enough to make that hit.

Obi-Wan might genuinely be the ONLY person who could go up against Anakin and WIN by the time you get to the Rebellion era. And it isn't because he's more powerful than anybody else, he just happens to have an advantage against this particular opponent which means that the disparity in power-levels is canceled out by Obi-Wan's knowledge of Anakin and the fact that he is just straight up smarter in a fight than Anakin is.

Ahsoka, by contrast, was taught by a dude who tends to rely on brute force to win his fights, and so that's often ALSO how we see her win her own fights. Most of the fights we see her winning are against opponents who are far weaker than she is, like Inquisitors or Mandalorians. Occasionally she fights someone like Maul and has to be a little smarter about it, but most of her major victories are against weaker opponents. She's a brute force fighter, not a smart fighter most of the time, because she CAN be. But she's not more powerful than ANAKIN, and she'll never be able to brute force her way through a fight with him, and she's not smart enough to outwit him, even if she WAS willing to hurt/kill him.

I'm not sure what "training" this person might've been referring to, either, because Ahsoka gets 1.5-2 years of official Padawan training MAXIMUM and some of that would've been Anakin's bullshit blaster blocking training which isn't exactly going to help Ahsoka against ANAKIN HIMSELF. As for the goddess thing, while it's definitely sort-of in there and implied, it's not technically confirmed and so far nothing has really been shown about it that makes her exponentially more powerful than anyone else. She has to flee a fight against Baylan, she'd have died fighting Morgan and the zombies if Sabine hadn't stayed behind to help her, she'd have died on Malachor if Ezra hadn't jumped in to help her, etc. She doesn't seem to have any super special goddess powers that we've seen so far, so it seems a little early to be counting that in her power levels.

Not to mention that in the "Most Powerful Jedi Alive During the Mandoverse" competition, she doesn't have a shit load of competitors she's up against here. The only other options to compare her against that are currently confirmed to be alive post-ROTJ are Luke, Leia, and Grogu. All three of them are shown to be pretty powerful in the Force, but Leia likely isn't super well-trained and Grogu is still a child, and therefore it doesn't seem fair to compare them to Ahsoka at this point. But Luke? I have a hard time believing Ahsoka is MORE powerful than Luke. Close, perhaps, we know she IS supposed to be fairly powerful in general, it's why she was able to be a Padawan so early, but possibly not MORE powerful.

And power alone does not actually guarantee a victory. She could be more powerful than Baylan, but if he's a better fighter, he'll still beat her. As shown with Obi-Wan and Anakin, power alone won't win a battle if your opponent is smart enough to simply outwit you. Obi-Wan can beat Anakin, and Baylan can beat Ahsoka. Ahsoka can be an extremely powerful Force user and still not be able to beat someone with better training than her.

I'll also note at the end here that Ahsoka isn't even canonically a Jedi at this point. She's never once claimed to be in the Ahsoka show and she explicitly says she isn't one in Rebels. She makes comments about how there's more to being a Jedi than using a lightsaber, but that isn't confirmation that she CONSIDERS herself a Jedi or that she'd call herself a Jedi. So she can't be the most powerful Jedi if she's not a Jedi at all. Same goes for Baylan, Grogu, and Leia.

Which leaves us back at Luke as the most powerful Jedi in existence within the timeline of the Ahsoka show because out of all of our options, Luke is the single person alive willing to actually identify as a fucking Jedi.