#one of them is like 'but stockholm syndrome isn't a real thing though'

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

I'd like to be a character in a science fiction adventure show but not like as the main character that shit's too stressful. I'd be like the human version of a trucker cat

[l1tw1ck]

The Fall of Spider-Man

bottom!ftm Miguel x top!masc!villain reader

🕷️ Word Count: 1,897 🕷️

AFAB Language Used

CW: Non-Con, Kidnapping, Lingerie, Fingering, Squirting, Cunnilingus, Overstimulation, Crying, Corruption, Creampie, Nipple Play, Pregnancy Mention, Stockholm Syndrome (Kinda?)

Miguel’s eyes shoot open. He immediately analyzes his surroundings. He’s tied up and on the floor. He can't see anything but he can tell he’s wearing lingerie. He feels sick. His first instinct is to try and get out of his restraints but no matter how hard he tries, nothing happens. He’s powerless. How? Why? When? Where the hell is he? He looks around the dark room, stopping to look at a door. There's light coming from behind it and he can hear movements. Footsteps. Getting closer and closer.

“You’re awake! Good morning, Miguel.” You smile, turning the lights on before walking towards him. “How are you feeling?”

“Who are you?” He asks.

You give him your name. “The person who's going to defeat Spider-Man once and for all.” You grin. “Although my methods are a bit unconventional.” You chuckle.

Miguel keeps his mouth shut, waiting to hear what you have to say next. Your confidence scares him. It's not like he's never met a confident villain before, it's honestly less likely to meet an insecure one, but your confidence is scary. You know something he doesn't. He knows you're dangerous. He always chooses to fight but everything inside him is screaming to run away. It's not like he has the choice now though.

“Pretty soon, you’ll be my beautiful husband and the father of our children.” You kiss his forehead. His heart drops. “But first, I’m gonna have some fun with you.” You kneel down and caress his cheek. He grimaces in disgust. “Let me give you the play by play.” You push his lacy red panties aside. “First, I’m gonna play with this pretty pussy of yours and give it a lot of love.” You rub his clit. “Then, once I’m done, I’m gonna slide my cock inside of you. I’ll make sure to go real slow, make you feel every inch of my cock.” You bring your fingers down to his entrance and push two of them in.

“Yo- you're sick.” He spits on you.

You wipe your cheek. “I didn't give you permission to speak, or spit.” You slap his cunt, earning a moan from him. “Watch yourself, Miguel.”

He looks at you angrily but doesn't say anything, too ashamed of the sound he just made and too afraid of the consequences to do so. You push your fingers in and out of his cunt, giving Miguel unwelcomed pleasure. “You like that?” You smirk, moving faster. He bites his lip to silence his moans. “I know you do. Even if you try to deny it, your body doesn't lie.”

He hates this so much.

“And then, I’ll pick up the pace. I’ll fuck you rough and hard. So rough that you won't be able to think. So hard that you’ll cry.” You push your fingers all the way in and thumb his clit, moving your fingers inside of him absentmindedly. He tries to fight against the pleasure but it's no use. He’s going to come.

“I’d love to see you cry.” You grin. He’s not going to cry. He might do a plethora of shameful things tonight but one thing he isn't going to do is cry. He refuses to. “I know you think it's impossible but it's not. And I can't wait to see you break.” You punctuate your last word with a hit to his g-spot. Miguel gasps, hips raising in the air as he squirts. Miguel looks down at himself in shame, cheeks burning hotter than a flame. He’s never done that before. He hates that you're the reason it happened. “Oh Miguel…” You let out a sharp breath.

You move in between his legs and dig into his wet cunt, slurping up his slick before tonguing his sensitive hole. Miguel squirms around in protest. Why does this feel so good? He wants to curse you out but he's worried about what you’ll do if he acts out. He feels terrible and so fucking good at the same time. He wants to kill you but he also doesn't want you to stop. He rolls his eyes back and squirts again, feeling extremely exhausted.

You pull away and stand up, stripping down to nothing. Miguel looks at your cock in horror. That's not going to fit! He desperately tries to get away but he can't do much in the position he's in.

“You’re really boosting my ego, Miguel.” You chuckle, kneeling back down and grabbing his waist. You pull him close to you so his thighs are on yours and your shaft is right against his cunt. “I’m going to enjoy this.” You look at him like the 5 star meal he is. You move him so that his pussy is sliding up and down your length, bringing the both of you pleasure.

He bares his fangs, showing you how angry he is without speaking. “Aw, you don't like this?” You frown, faking sympathy. “Or is it that you want something else?” You grin. “You want me to fuck you, is that it? You want me to finally fuck you?”

Miguel shakes his head rapidly. You move him backwards, just enough for you to be able to make an easier entrance. You point your tip against his clit, smearing pre cum over it and sliding down in between his folds. You tease him with your entrance, you're gently thrusting into him but only the tip is entering him. He can't stand the feeling. You eventually stop and slowly push your cock inside of him. You weren't exaggerating when you said he’d feel every inch of you. You’re practically tearing him apart with the way you’re stretching him out. You bite your lip, thoroughly enjoying his pussy. “I think I’m in heaven.”

If you’re in heaven, then Miguel’s in hell. You slowly slide in and out of him, reveling in his wet warmth. “That's right baby, sit back and take it like the pretty little slut you are.” You place your hand over the bulge of your cock on his stomach, enjoying the way it feels as you move and how sexy he looks with his tummy bulging. “You’re doing so good for me, you know that? Doing so well…”

He doesn't want to be good for you. He doesn't want you to enjoy this. If he wasn't afraid of the consequences he’d curse you out. You rub his clit gently, causing his breathing to turn shallow. “I wanna feel you come..” You mutter. “Come for me, baby.”

He grits his teeth, trying to stop himself from giving you what you want but it's too difficult. He can't hold back. It all feels too good, his pussy feels way too good, he can't do anything to prevent this. He shuts his eyes and comes, walls fluttering around your length. “You’re such a good boy, Miguel. You may be prickly but at least you know how to follow orders.” You caress his cheek. He turns away from your touch. “Even after all that…you're still trying to keep up this facade?” You pull away and turn him onto his stomach. “You won't be able to pretend any longer, Miguel.” You raise his ass in the air and plunge your length fully into him. He gasps. Miguel doesn't even get a minute to adjust to the new position thanks to you suddenly pounding into him. He rolls his eyes back, letting out uncontrollable moans as you fuck the shame out of him. He can barely think over the explicit sounds of your hips snapping against his ass and the loud wet sounds of your cock sliding in and out of his sensitive pussy. You're going too fast for him to even try and act like he doesn't like it. He’s always had a thing for being treated roughly and you're fulfilling his need for it. You pull on his hair, causing him to let out an almost scream-like moan as he squirts.

“Fu- fuck-” He feels tears welling up in his eyes as you continue fucking him through his orgasm.

“‘M gonna give you the child you always wanted, Miguel.” You fuck him even rougher than before, chasing your orgasm. Tears flow rapidly from Miguel’s eyes, as if there was a blockage that contained all his tears and prevented him from crying all these years. He sobs, crying loudly as you overwhelm him with pleasure. It feels good but it's too much, he can't handle it. He loves it but he needs it to stop. “Ah, I love hearing you cry..” You slow down your thrusts and dump your load inside of him. Miguel uses this break to finally catch his breath and calm down.

“Aw, was it too much for you, baby?” You coo, rubbing your hand down his back.

Miguel nods. “Ple- please..” He whimpers.

You pull out and turn him around. You pick him up and sink him down on your cock. You place your hands on his waist and kiss his cheek. “You’re so pretty when you cry, you know that?” You caress his face gently. He sniffles, not sure how to feel about that. You press your lips against his, kissing him slowly and sensually. Miguel reciprocates the kiss, following your tongue movements and subconsciously grinding down on your cock. He feels a little less stimulated than before. He feels like he's about to have an orgasm that’ll never come and somehow it feels good. He doesn't know how he feels about you now but you make him feel good, and thanks to the current state of mind he's in now, that's all that matters.

You pull away from the kiss and pepper kisses down his throat and to his chest. You undo the clip in the middle of his bra, causing the two cups to separate and reveal his breasts. You latch onto his nipple, sucking it gently while your hand goes to pull and twist on the other one. Miguel whimpers in pleasure. His nipples are so sensitive, he’ll definitely come from this. “mmh..” Miguel grinds down harder as he orgasms, his pussy clenching and unclenching around your length. You pull away from his nipple, your saliva dripping down the brown bud.

He still despises you but he knows he'll be stuck with you from now on. He’ll eventually learn to love you.

Miguel turns on the radio as he starts cooking breakfast. The reporter talks about all the crime going on in the city and he doesn't seem to care, even though he’s back to normal and completely autonomous, he has no intention of going out to fight. He wants to stay home with you. The Spider Society’s been trying to contact him but he's ignored all their calls. He only leaves the house for dates and groceries, why would he go anywhere without you? He loves you so much, he wants to stay by your side as much as he can. Nobody seems to understand it but he doesn't care to explain it to them. Peter B. and Jessica have been trying to convince Miguel to come back and many spider people have tried to kill you but to no avail. He doesn't want to come back, especially not when they're trying to kill his beloved. He’s perfectly content with where he is now and he can't wait to have his first child with you.

[animeyanderelover]

To: Tsukinami Brothers (Poly) NSFW/THREESOME

Let's talk about a s/o who has Stolchom syndrome… what if Tsukinami brother's petite s/o wants to do threesome with them?

Thanks in advance! <3

Back to my studies, everyone!

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, abduction, isolation, mind break, Stockholm syndrome, Nsfw, breeding kink, specific mentions of darling's body type, afab s/o

Threesome

🔮​🐺​A threesome with those two won't be quite as easily achievable as you might think it is for the mere reason that those two quite often argue about how to treat you. Shin is a hopeless sadist who just wants to hurt you and see you suffer for no evident reason, Carla only hurts you to break your mind and shape you into his ideal version. Outside of that though, he won't harm you as long as you behave and since Stockholm syndrome has kicked in, he's become more lenient. By all means, the older of the Tsukinami brothers has no desire to share you with his brother, your request is perplexing and mildly he's even displeased because even if he's sharing with Shin, it's disappointing to find out that you seem to value his younger brother as much as you do him.

🔮​🐺​Shin finds your request initially just as strange because he absolutely doesn't want to share either, especially since Carla is in general the one who always forbids him to have his fun with you, he always has to hold back whether it's a simple torture or filthy and humiliating sex with you. Sure, you are a human but you aren't made of porcelain either. The younger brother knows the motives behind his brother's demands though, he wants your body to not sustain any permanent damage so that you can bear him an heir. What even is the appeal of a crying and helpless little brat anyways? Yet Shin is the one who kind of isn't as opposed to the idea as Carla is. Something about the aspect of possibly being able to get under Carla's skin is rather thrilling because as much as he respects his older brother, sometimes he just wants to spite him a bit.

🔮​🐺​Carla is the hardest one to crack because he's so strictly against the idea of sharing you physically like this. He has no desire to see Shin doing things in his own style which is distasteful and undesirable at best in his eyes. Carla knows that Shin is a freak but that doesn't mean that he wants to see for himself. So Shin ends up pestering him with the idea of it whilst you have to continue begging him, hoping that he might agree. If Carla tells both of you clearly that he has no interest though, it's wisest to stop because otherwise he sees it as an act of you disobeying him which naturally means that he has to teach you how to do better next time. You've been doing so well for him up until now, you wouldn't want to disappoint him. You shouldn't be such a hungry, little slut. He alone should be more than enough to satisfy your needs in the sheets.

🔮​🐺​A threesome with both of them, if Carla should agree to it with great skepticism, would be tiring and exhausting for their darling. Because even if Carla considers your petite form and warns Shin to hold back, especially now that he's present, ultimately both vampires are still sadists with an unlimited amount of stamina. Shin enjoys bickering with his older brother a bit simply to break his normally composed facade a bit by purposely getting on his nerves, earning him from Carla a sharp snarl all whilst the white-haired male is pounding into you. Shin is forbidden to cum into you to ensure that you'll be carrying Carla's child and even whilst the First Blood King will take you all for himself later anyways, he might as well start already now. Shin has no real problem with that. A crying and screeching baby is the last thing he wants and he has a defined love of soiling you in spit, sweat, your own blood and his sticky cum or simply watching you chock on his dick as he fucks your mouth.

[dead-dove-yandere]

Idol darling getting a bloodied heart in the mail from Laura...

Darling isn't sure where or who it came from, but poor Laura signed it with her real name like the girl-failure she is.... <3

Maybe her darling is into it?

~ 💌

Yessss, I love it when the darling starts to realise they’re into the violence >:))

TW: Stalking, obsession, bereavement, murder, gore, stockholm syndrome

You forced a smile on the livestream - only fifteen more minutes and then you could rest. You loved being an idol, but keeping up the façade of being perfect all the time wore you to the bone, and chances to let the mask drop were few and far between. You pulled the sack your secretary had left for you into the view of the camera upon seeing the cue from your manager, who stood behind the camera, prompting you to make sure you stayed on track.

“Now it’s time to open some fan mail!” You said cheerfully. You picked up the box at the top of the sack, placing it in your lap. Your manager gave you a glare, letting you know that you’d forgotten your line, and you stifled a defeated sigh, holding the box in your lap still.

“As you know, things have been really difficult for me recently ever since my partner went missing just a week ago. But reading all your fan mail has really helped and reminded me that I am loved!” The words were sickly and saccharine as they dripped from your grin like syrup. You wanted to keep it private. You wanted to mourn in peace, you didn’t even want to do this stupid livestream, but your manager’s word was law, and you’d be damned if you went against it. You looked at the parcel in your lap.

“This one is from Laura, it says - well, I’ve certainly been getting a lot of fan mail from you!” Your manager shot you another glare as you went off script again. You silently opened the box with the letter opened that was conveniently on the table in front of you, and began to rummage through the packing peanuts inside. You could usually figure out what had been sent before you saw it, just from feeling the weight of the box alone. If a fan’s parcel was light, it was probably a plushie of some sort. If it was heavier, it was usually snacks, but of course you were never allowed to eat them, not just because of a tamper risk, but also because food in the post tended to begin rotting before it reached you anyway. It felt as though there was food inside this box. Whatever that crazed fan had sent, you hoped it would at least look edible on camera, and hadn’t melted or desiccated or gone mouldy.

You feel curved glass as your hand finds the object within - maybe something in a jar, like jam or chocolate spread? You wrap both hands around it and lift it out, displaying it to the camera before it had even registered what it was you were in fact presenting to your thousands of adoring fans.

“Wow!” You said, following the routine blindly, and then it clicked. You froze as you stared wide eyes at the jar in your hands. Inside of it was a heart, and it looked human too. It seemed fairly fresh still despite being in the post, but it had turned a strange, rusty brown colour and was covered in clots of coagulated blood. You wanted your scream, but it died in your throat before you could even muster it.

“Cut!” Your manager hissed, and the livestream was cut off abruptly, leaving everyone, both you and your fans, utterly confused and horrified. You quickly placed the jar on the table, disgusted, but you couldn’t tear your eyes off of it. There was a label on the jar, in that same paste up style that Laura always composed her letters in to disguise her handwriting.

“Now you can see their heart wasn’t suitable for you, my soulmate. -Laura”

“Jesus Christ, what the hell is that?” Your manager growled angrily at no one in particular.

“It’s… it’s my partner’s heart,” you say, your voice wavering as your vision blurs with tears, your own heart hammering in your chest. Your manager scoffed.

“It ain’t. It’ll be some sheep heart from a butcher or something. Some tasteless prank.” He grabbed the jar with a disgusted look.

“I thought you said you checked the parcels!” You cried, beginning to get angry as your anxiety worsened, your hands shaking and bile churning in your stomach.

“We do, but for things like guns or bombs. We don’t exactly have the means to detect a piece of meat.” Your manager sighed, flagrantly ignoring the no smoking sign as he lit up a cigarette. “You get some rest or whatever. I have to go draft an official apology.” Your manager left the room, taking the heart with him and leaving you alone with a dead camera. As the initial shock wore off and you began to dissociate, you were surprised to learn that you didn’t feel upset anymore. Not even frightened of Laura, or what she was capable of. You felt disappointed that the heart was gone. You knitted your brow, trying to make sense of the feeling, but no understanding came, at least not easily. You mused out loud to yourself in the empty room.

“She sent me my partner’s heart in a jar, supposedly… why does it feel good?”

Meanwhile, Laura laid on her bed, kicking her feet and giggling as she rewinded the livestream on her phone again, all to listen to your reaction again just before your manager spoiled the fun. She watched you pull the jar out and present it to the camera, a cheery “Wow!” Escaping your lips. That simple utterance was the best reaction she could have ever hoped for.

Dividers Credit: See Pinned Post

[foxes-that-run]

Make my day

I am obsessed with this song, I sincerely hope the muse is also. It was leaked on 7 December 2023.

Lyrics

Make my day has pair of lines, one with a good thing about his life and one that shows that that doesn't make up for loneliness

You don't want to hear my tiny violin You don't want to hear my explanation

Harry is aware how lucky his life is, he thinks he shouldn't complain. You should Harry, I wish this was on the album.

They make me feel wanted, make me come fast The hottest of fires still cold when it's ash

He refers to his millions of screaming fans as making him feel wanted (you are Harry).

However, no matter how loud they are, large the crowd is, it's cold when he is alone.

I make lots of money, build a big house Put an extra sink in, say I'll settle down

He's building a '£30m house, but has no one to use his double sink. He puts it in anyway hoping one day he has someone to use it

Friends call me a loner, I know they're wrong She asks me to choke her, I play along

His friends see him as a single hot guy having kinky sex, but he just wants someone to share his life and is going along to not be alone.

This combination is that Harry is lonely but 'active' with this person is also on his albums:

Keep Driving: Choke her with a sea view [..] Hey, you Should we just keep driving? (Seaview was an Adore You MV Easter Egg) and

Fine Line: "Spreading you open Is the only way of knowing you"

Harry's an extremely desirable man, he's in love with someone he hooks up with and wants to be more to them.

Hit me like a red line, straight to my face/vein Hit me with a real life and that's when I'll change

The Red Line is the central London line. When he is with the love of his life everything will change. When it is real he will settle down, he wants to.

After the Bridge the pairings change, no longer a good/lonely pairing they become a bad thing made better by being with his love.

If the grass isn't greener, if the song's out of tune It'll all go away when it comes to you

Harry is saying if things don't work or are hard that will be fine, because having this person is the one thing he needs.

You won't have the answers to all my questions I'll piss you off, won't learn my lesson

Harry doesn't expect that this person will be everything to him or vice versa, he is singing to a particular person that it's been hard with before. Not learning his lesson is similar to previous songs he's not changed I Just wanna love you "Selfish, crazy and I'm never gonna change" Though he did in Stockholm Syndrome "Used to sing about being free but now he's changed his mind"

I don't want you perfect, don't want too sweet But you'll make my day and make my whole week

Harry refers to Perfect, a song about how they are not so and n The 1 Taylor said "And it would've been sweet / If it could've been me".

[facesblind]

×     𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲  𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗼𝗻𝘀

name  :  uses  various  ones,  depending  on  her  current  residence (  and  verse  ).

nickname  :  miri  (  by  @agentvalentine  )  ;  mimi  (  by  @buriedabove  ).

gender  :  nonbinary,  femme  presenting  (  doesn't  actually  care  about  gender,  uses  she / her  pronouns  and  highlights  feminine  parts  of  her  body  out  of  convenience  ).

romantic  orientation  :  panromantic,  though  sexuality - wise  —  asexual.

preferred  pet  names  :  doesn't  have  any,  really.  menace  or  brat  would  do  though  hehe.

relationship  status  :  verse  dependent  but  i  get  to  talk  about  the  relationships  so  HERE  WE  GO.  fate  is  in  a  romantic  relationship / situationship  with  @buriedabove  and  it's  my  primary  ship  on  the  whole  blog  ;  she  considers  herself  taken  even  before  leon  acknowledges  his  feelings  towards  her  (  she  simply  wasn't  interested  in  pursuing  anything  other  than  what  she  has  with  kennedy  ).

also  in  naruto  verse  she's  in  a  romantic  relationship  with  @tragedysworn's sasuke,  lee  and  kabuto,  but  it's  v  complicated.  in  theory,  she's  just  friends  with  the  youngest  uchiha  and  at  first  dates  lee,  though  despite  their  somewhat  mutual  feelings  decides  to  leave  the  hidden  leaf  village  with  sasque.  during  their  stay  at  orochimaru's,  fate  decides  to  """  romance  """  kabuto  as  eventual  backup  plan  if  the  snake  man  wished  to  kick  her  out  (  so  both  kabuto  and  sasuke  would  protest,  and  they're  the  dearest  for  orochimaru  :)))  ).  she  fakes  whatever  kabuto  wishes  they  had  while  sleeping  with  sasuke,  in  the  end  parting  ways  with  the  uchiha  too,  only   to  be  reunited...  you  get  it.  something  something  soulmates.

OH  and  there's  a  verse  in  which  she's  in  a  polyamorous  relationship  with  @desireshonour's  phillip  graves  and  @thehollyverse's  holly.

and  oh  my  god.  prometheus!!!  they're  a  couple  and  actually  prome  is  fate's  og  partner.  they're  bound  by  her  decisions  and  he'll  never  be  free  from  her.  it's...  v  toxic  but  v  sweet  all  the  same.  me  and  prometheus'  writer  are  brainstorming  if  david  (  prome's  real  name  )  actually  loves  fate,  or  if  it's  a  stockholm  syndrome.

annnnd  that's  it  when  it  comes  to  labeled  relationships.  it's  probably  v  chaotic  but.  i  love  all  these.

opinion  on  true  love  :  okay  that's  tough  because...  she  usually  chooses  her  "  targets  "  and  picks  whom  she  wants  to  love.  as  weird  as  it  sounds.  so  for  her,  that's  true  love  —  feelings  she  kinda  makes  in  her  head  &&.  stays  loyal  to  them,  stubborn  little  bitch!!!

opinion on love at first sight  :  i  did  roleplay  it,  but  it  was  rather  fascination  directed  at  someone  as  insane  and  intelligent  as  her.  she  doesn't  beieve  with  love  at  first  sight  per  se,  as  mentioned  above  :  she's  consciously  choosing  her  loved  ones  :)

how  ‘romantic’  are  they?  :  taking  the  most  common  meaning  of  the  word?  she  isn't.  but,  she  accomodates  and  adjusts  her  behavior  to  please  her  loved  ones,  so  if  her  lover  likes  receiving  flowers,  she'll  make  sure  to  get  them  a  bouquet  or  a  plant  from  time  to  time.

ideal  physical  traits  :  none.  a  body  is  just  a  body,  everyone  has  it.  though  it's  worth  noting  fate  has  a  thing  for  people  older  than  her  and  leans  for  the  masculine  presenting  ones,  but  it's  because  of  her  daddy  issues  with  no  deeper  meaning.

ideal  personality  traits  :  i  said  it  once,  but  she  exclusively  dates  cringefail  boylosers  and  it's...  an  accident  from  my  side,  but  it's  also  a  pattern.  she'd  love  to  have  someone  of  an  iq  level  close  to  hers,  but  there's  little  chance  it's  going  to  happen,  alas  she  finds  herself  dating...  well................

unattractive  physical  traits  :  lack  of  hygiene.  that's  it.

unattractive  personality  traits  :  what  is  annoying  in  one  person,  fate  can  find  charming  in  another,  and  even  the  annoyance  can  be  enjoyable  if  it's  the  right  person  (  for  example,  @the1ongcon  ).  so,  it's  hard  to  say  if  there's  something  unattractive  per  se  as  it  varies  from  person  to  person.

ideal  date  :  she'll  adapt  to  whatever.  though  she  really  enjoyed  being  taken  to  a  conference  with  a  scientist.

do  they  have  a  type?  :  mentioned  above  —  older  and  masculine,  though  it's  not  a  rule.

average  relationship  length  :  forever,  in  life  and  in  death.  once  fate  decides  you're  hers,  there's  no  way  out.

preferred  non - sexual  intimacy  :  long  talks,  especially  when  she  gets  to  elaborate  on  her  favorite  theories  and  somebody  actually  listens.  deep  conversations  in  general,  too.

opinion  of  public  affection  :  indifference.  she's  okay  with  it,  she's  okay  without  it.  usually,  fate  prefers  to  stick  close  to  her  partners,  so  holding  hands  is  a  somewhat  regular  occurence.  she  won't  force  it  upon  anybody  though.

past  relationships?  :  i  usually  write  fate  with  no  partners  prior  to  any  romantic  connections  me  and  my  writing  partners  come  up  with.  it  can  be  assumed  there  are  none,  except  for  a  timeline  in  which  she  parts  ways  with  leon  &&.  one  in  which  she  parts  ways  with  lee  and  sasuke  for  a  brief  moment.  she  doesn't  seek  a  romantic  partner  afterwards,  and  it's  both  because  she's  stubborn  and  because  she's  written  with  the  manic  pixie  dream  girl  trope  in  mind  —  she  """  belongs  """  to  the  main  protagonist  and  without  him,  it's  all  empty  pages  until  they  reunite  in  the  next  chapter.

tagged  by:  stole  it  off  dash  &&.  from  being  tagged  on  my  other  blogs. tagging:  whoever  wants  to,  because  that's  a  lot  of  writing,  but.  @buriedabove,  @playedbetter  (for  zevran,  viktor  and  zachary?),  @vulpesse,  @withinchains  (for  morgana,  kayn  and  aphelios  please!  and  bun - bun  too?),  @oriphical  (i'm  SO  CURIOUS  barking  howling  screaming),  @nezemny  (for  any  muse  of  your  choice  :3),  @brvo6  (if  i'm  tagging  you  too  much  let  me  know  pls),  @dreamweaved  (for  briar  and  if  you  want,  for  kuro  too!!),  @thehollyverse  (holly  &&.  nick),  @tragedysworn  (choji,  deidara,  sauce  k,  lee,  kairi,  natsumi,  akari,  kabuto,  basically  EVERYONE  at  this  point  but .  whoever  you  want  actually .),  aaaaaAAAAAAA  who  else  can  i  tag  i'm  curious  of  100%  of  my  moots,  @tealbeats,  @dimitresca,  @phasmasum,  @siabann  (&&.  gaz  too?),  @legionarm,  @ixalova  (yasuo,  sylas,  lee?)  &&.  you!

[strawberryscorner]

Forgotten Sins Chapter 1

Tags: Amnesia, Stockholm Syndrome, Drug Use (Bliss), Religious Cults, Fluff and Angst, Car Accidents, Family Member Death, Manipulation, Emotional Manipulation

Note: Hey, I just wanted to let you all know some things before reading this story, This is a reader-insert and it is written in the second person but she has/you have amnesia from the events in the first chapter so when asked your name, you can't respond with the "Y/N" answer so you'll get the name Dawn.

Also, I'm not from America so if British words slip in, forgive me because the character/you are meant to be American since it's Far Cry 5.

Other than that, have fun! (also, let me know if I missed something in the tags at any point of the story!)

Series Masterlist

Almost as soon as your dad drives past the Welcome to Hope County sign, the radio started playing a song about letting the water wash away your sins.

"What is this garbage?" he asked, going to turn the radio off but your mom smacked his hand away.

"It's what you need with that gambling addiction of yours," she said, returning to her phone, "no signal." She put the phone down and looked out the window.

"It's pretty cute here," you said, looking out your window.

"Pretty cute?" your dad asks. "There's nothing here!"

You roll your eyes and keep focusing on what's outside your window. Your dad always was a bit grumpy on these road trips, yet it was always him who insisted on taking them, good for family bonding. Now that you were an adult and had moved out long ago and your brother was going off to college, it was time for another road trip. While your dad and mom argued about the quickest way to your destination that your parents kept secret to add to the fun, you started humming along to the radio.

"Where even are we?" your mom asked.

"Holland Valley, well, just left it according to this sign," your dad said.

You see a shirtless man with the words greed and wrath tattooed on his torso running from a group of people, they're all shooting at each other.

"Is that real?" your brother asked, hearing the gunshots.

"Look away!" your dad yells at us as the shirtless man fell to the ground. You turn to look out the window on your brother's side but there were people with guns running towards the car, most likely to fight the people on the other side of your vehicle.

"Oh God, what is that?" your mother asked, pointing at a man with a beard and a red shirt that had been cut into a vest held up what looked like a rocket launcher, though you couldn't be too sure, you'd only ever seen them in video games. You see a rocket heading towards the car, no one has time to get out before it hits.

__________________

You wake up, one hand handcuffed to the railing of the bed you're laying on. The other hand goes up to touch your pounding head, only resulting in more pain so you quickly remove your hand. There isn't much in the room with you, just the bed you're laying on, a table and a chair.

"Ah good, you're finally awake," a man with long brown hair and a bushy beard said, pulling the chair closer to the bed before sitting down.

"Awake?" your throat was painfully dry and your voice came out weak, almost as a raspy whisper.

"You've been out for a while, a few weeks," he said, "weren't too sure you'd make it, no one else did."

"Made what? Who else?"

"What's your name?" he asked.

You thought about it for a while but couldn't remember, "I don't know," you answer honestly.

"Guess the accident messed with your brain more than we thought," he mumbled, "how about we call you Dawn?"

You don't know what to say, that's probably not close to whatever your name was but you couldn't remember so arguing against it seemed pointless. Eventually, you just nod your head, accepting your new name.

"Well, Dawn, you and what we assume to be your family were in the wrong place at the wrong time," he said. "You see, we got somewhat of a war going on here, a cult leader who calls himself The Father is trying to take over Hope County. Save us from what he calls The Collapse that he knows will happen because God told him. My people were captured by fucking Peggies - his followers. Now is the part that affects you, you and your family got in the crossfire between my people and the Peggies, well, they had a rocket launcher, fired it at you. We pulled you out of the car, but your family all died, your mom was already dead in the car, and your dad and brother died here later. I'm sorry."

You tried to remember it but you couldn't, you couldn't even remember your family, their names, faces, voices nothing.

"Why don't I remember?" you ask.

"You hit your head pretty hard, you might remember at some point but you may also never get your memory back," he shrugged.

"What's your name?" you ask.

"I'm Eli."

He stood up and took out a small key, "Am I right in assuming you won't be a danger?"

You nodded. While you had no memory to be sure, you didn't feel dangerous. He unlocked the handcuff.

"You can stay in here for a while, Hurk is right outside this door. Hurk get in here," a man with a beard and a red shirt walked in, he seemed familiar but you couldn't remember why.

"Do I know you?" you asked.

"No," Eli answered for the man, "but Hurk here will help you if you want to walk around."

With that, both men leave you alone in the room. 

You stayed in bed for a while, thinking about everything Eli had told you, trying to remember anything from any point in your life but you couldn't. You were thankful you seemed to remember your language and how to talk. Now, you needed to see if you were strong enough to be able to walk. Don't fall flat on your face, you thought to yourself before sitting in the bed, your feet touching the ground. You closed your eyes and held your hands out in front of you as you slowly stood up, when you did instantly fall, you slowly opened your eyes. You take a deep breath before attempting to take your first step, it was wobbly, and you fall forward but you're able to catch yourself on the chair Eli was sitting on earlier. You thought about calling for Hurk to help you walk but you wanted to do it on your own, your legs just needed to wake up, Eli did say you were out for a few weeks, naturally, your legs would be weak like your voice was. After a few seconds, you dare try again, letting go of the chair and pushing it a bit in front of you so you can use it to catch yourself again if needed. Which you did.

"Shit," you say to yourself, but it comes out more of a whisper. "Hurk?" you call out as loud as you can but it doesn't come out very loud and he doesn't come in so it's safe to assume he couldn't hear you. Well, I can still stand, you thought before getting up from the chair and throwing it at the door.

"Dude, are you okay?" Hurk said, throwing the door open, holding a gun, "whoa, sorry about calling you dude, I don't want to assume nothin' but I call everyone dude so I don't mean no disrespect or nothin'-"

"I can't walk," you interrupt him, not really caring to hear more of this odd apology when you just want to walk.

"What do you mean you can't walk?" he asks. You take a step forward and fall, he catches you and helps you back to your feet.

You make it outside with Hurk's help, he's pointing to everyone who walks by, telling you their names, what they usually do around here and how fun they are to talk to on a scale of "better to talk to Monkey King than them to actually a good listener, they're fine"  as you drink a glass of water.

"Where are we?" you ask.

"We're in Whitetail Mountains," he answers.

"Where are my family?" he looks to his feet when you ask that, "I know they're dead. Eli told me. But what happened to their bodies?"

"I'm not really sure," he scratched the back of his head, going quiet. You hadn't known him long at all but hadn't known him to do that.

"Well, what about the Pennys?"

"Pennys?" he looks confused for a while.

"The cult?"

Hurk laughs, "you mean Peggies."

"Yeah, Peggies."

"They're followers of the big guy, not Monkey King, the other big guy. You know, I almost joined 'em. They had guns, food, fine ass women, why wouldn't you join?" he paused, looking at you and when you didn't say anything, he continued. "Well, I didn't join because o' all these rules you have to follow, no partyin', no fornicatin' - that means fuckin', didn't sound so fun after that so I went home."

He was going to keep talking until a radio started making noise. He excused himself and took a few steps away.

"You want to know about the cult, sweetheart?" an older lady in jeans and a pink blouse asked.

"Yes," you said.

"I'm Adelaide, you are?"

"I'm Dawn," you said, remembering Eli's name for you.

"Well, Dawn, the cult has pretty much taken over Hope County, brainwashed everyone into believing the world is going to end and only Joseph Seed can save their souls. They take you in, make you confess your sins through torture then continue to torture you either by forcing you to make that Bliss shit until you lose your damn mind or by training you to be a soldier, ain't been many survivors to tell us how it goes but we can assume it's not pleasant."

"And people join willingly?" you ask, thinking back to what Hurk said.

"They do, some completely willingly, either with or without the knowledge of what the cult does, or some join willingly but after some tough persuasion.

And some join because they're idiots like my boy," she moves her head towards Hurk.

"You're Hurk's mother?"

"I am," she smiled.

"Come with me, we got a job," he said, interrupting our conversation.

"Me?" you asked, seeing him looking at you instead of his mother.

"Yeah, don't worry, it's not a big job, just collectin' some meat then droppin' it off," he got in a truck.

"Collecting meat? From where?"

"We're going huntin', you been huntin' before?"

"I don't know."

"I can teach you."

On the way to where he wanted to hunt, he spoke about his relationship with his father, it didn't sound like a very good one. It made you wonder what yours was like, maybe you'd remember one day. Instead, you smiled and hummed when it was appropriate. He didn't give you much time to speak.

"Here we are," he said, stopping the car and handing you a gun. "There's a lot of Caribou here?"

"Caribou?"

"You'll know it when you see it, they're hard to miss."

"Why are we hunting this thing?" you ask.

"For food, we gotta eat, don't we?" he laughed as you nodded.

You walk behind Hurk, he was telling you about the parts of the gun and how to shoot it. You had a hard time following what he was saying but he assured you it would come easy when you had to actually take the shot. You walked for a while without seeing anything more than trees but eventually, Hurk stopped you.

"There, see it?" he points towards a big animal with horns.

"That's a Caribou?" he nodded. "We're meant to kill that?" he nodded again. He really was crazy.

"Won't it attack us? With those horns?"

"What? Nah, 'course not. They ain't predators, they'll just run away."

You nodded, watching as he raised his gun. Part of you wanted to stop him from shooting the animal but he was right before, you do have to eat and you saw quite a lot of people to feed at the bunker. He shot the animal, but it didn't die.

"Shit, I missed," the animal ran off and Hurk chased it, not knowing what else to do, you ran after Hurk. Eventually, the Caribou slowed down near a lake. Hurk managed to kill it there.

"You stay here, I'll go get the truck." You turned your back to the animal, not wanting to see the corpse. The lake and trees were beautiful so you focused on them until you heard tires. You expected to see Hurk but were surprised to see three men with tattoos that said Wrath, Lust and Pride on each of them.

"What are you doing here, sinner?" One of the men asked, pulling his gun out but keeping it by his side.

"Nothing," you said, backing away, "hunting."

The men laugh at you but stop once you hear more tires, before anyone can react Hurk drives over the two men in front of you. One of the men flew over the truck while the other one is trapped underneath. The third man makes it back to his car and drove away. The man under the truck was probably already dead or at least it seemed that way since he wasn't moving or making any sound. The man who flew over the truck tries to get back up but is shot by Hurk.

"Alright, let's get that thing on the back and head off," Hurk said, lifting the animal. All you can do is watch. He just killed a man; sure he had a gun but you didn't expect Hurk to be so okay with killing two people. Even if he did kill the animal, that was different, that was to eat, this was for nothing? 

"Why did you kill them?" you ask.

"Well, they're Peggies," he said, getting back into the truck after loading the corpse onto it. They're Peggies, that's the only reason. Based on what you had been told, it was Joseph that was bad, the Peggies were just brainwashed but apart from that, you hadn't heard much. What Hurk did seemed worse than just not partying or training. Adelaide did mention torture as well but if Hurk could kill a man so easily, maybe they weren't telling the whole truth or maybe they just weren't any better than the Peggies?

"You gettin' in or what?" Hurk called from the driver's seat. You didn't want to but felt you had no choice; you didn't want to be left out here.

"Where are we going?"

"Chad Wolanski, he's a cool guy but can't understand him for shit though," he said. He speeds there, explaining he doesn't want to bump into any more Peggies.

"We're here!" Hurk calls out, getting out of the truck and you hear a man grumbling. Hurk lifts the Caribou out of the truck, sort of dragging it around the house. "Hey Chad, got a new member with me."

Chad mumbles something that sounds like hello.

"Hello, I'm Dawn," it felt slightly less strange to call yourself Dawn this time.

Chad and Hurk started talking while helping each other with the meat. You weren't sure how Hurk understood what Chad was saying, only one word per sentence was said loud and semi-clear enough to make out and the rest was mumbled and jumbled together. You kept yourself preoccupied with looking at the scenery. The radio was on and started playing a song about letting the water wash away your sins, it felt familiar and you easily hummed along. It made Chad mumble something angrily to Hurk.

"I don't know, I never had the radio on," Hurk answered, also raising his voice at Chad.

"Hey," Hurk called for you, "how you know that song?" 

"I don't know, it just sounds familiar somehow," you answered, unsure what the problem was, neither man said anything, just mumbled something to themselves. 

"Let's head back," Hurk said, saying goodbye to Chad.

Hurk was awfully quiet while driving, you reached for the radio, tired of the silence and not knowing how to fill it. Before you could turn it on a car drove in front of yours, making Hurk have to hit the brakes.

"Whoa, shit," he said, "are you okay?" 

"I'm fine, you?" 

"Yeah," he took his belt off and picked up his gun, "fucking Peggies. Come on."

You got out of the car with him. You stayed crouching behind your open door, Hurk moving forward. It was going well for him until, "Hurk, behind you!" You yelled but he didn't react on time, a Peggie from behind him hit him on the back of his head with their gun, knocking him out. You notice it's the Peggie who escaped after Hurk ran his friends over.

"Are you going to come with us willing, sinner, or are we going to have to make you?" the one from earlier asked you.

"I'll go," you said, standing with your hands up, scared of what they'd do if you didn't go willingly since two of them had their guns pointed toward you.

"Good choice," he said, his friends putting their guns down.

[noodleshark]

How I see Six

    Six is so interesting to me when thinking about where her character starts and ends. Her starting off as kindhearted and hopeful is something I mostly made up but there’s reason behind it. When she and RCG got to meet for real, her first instinct was to help. Even after she got left for dead, she still tried to save RCG’s life, but it ended horribly. The first “friend” she ever had died infront of her, and Six probably thinks she could’ve prevented it.

   Then she gets kidnapped and isolated from everyone but her captor for I think 2 goddamn months. Her first interaction with someone who isn't the hunter after that time is the door being BROKEN DOWN WITH AN AXE! The first thing she gets to do after escaping the hunter is killing him which can either be really cathartic or mixed for her depending if she started developing stockholm syndrome or not.

   And then after being saved she gets kidnapped again, so girl has no sense of safety at this point. I like to think that during the city part of LN2, she started getting a bit better, maybe she started feeling safe again, but that safety and healing gets taken away from her when the thin man kidnapped her. Yes, even though she has anything she could want when we find her, I’m not gonna ignore how much the thin man kidnapping her traumatized her.

   Six tried to find peace after all of this and share her music box with Mono but he destroyed it with her trust in him in the process(this isnt to slander mono he was just helping her but she didnt know that). The amount of anger she must’ve felt at him, for releasing the thin man, for destroying the 1 nice thing she had, so Six lets go. I don’t think it dawned on her what she did until she got out.

 The worst part is that she saw another friend fall, but this time she was the one who did it.

      The first time she saw a TV after all of this, has a hat and that music box in the same room. She tried to share something she’s interested in with other kids again, but it gets destroyed in front of her eyes once again. She’d lose all of her hope in befriending other kids at this point, why should she try, they’ll just hurt her or she’d hurt them. 

      She has to make an awful decision and eats the lady to survive, she kills the guests. Starting the story as someone kind, only to become angry and hurt by the end of it.

Anyways please don’t put her in LN3, she’s at her breaking point and if anymore shit happens she might either go apeshit or have a breakdown.

[dokukoi]

i don’t remember if you have a normal ask in your inbox from me but! how has noe and rens relationship changed the long theyve known each other/been together? what are some things that have stayed the same throughout it all and what things have become different??

- @freakkisser

so, basically, you can sum them up as friends to one-sided love to being the lovey-dovey couple they are now!

noe is the one who's most changed; ren has mostly stayed the same with his feelings and actions towards noe, though as the relationship goes on he gets less violent towards noe and tries to move the relationship in as healthy of a direction as he can without really letting his claws out of them. which isn't saying much, but it's still something.

before ren, noe was completely isolated—they had acquaintances but no real friends. noe loved talking to ren whenever he called it because it was the first time they had gotten geniune human interaction in a year. noe then basically has the same personality as current noe, just a little more shy and subdued, and way more prone to panic+anxiety attacks and depressive episodes

for the first two months after ren kidnapped them, though, they basically shut-down. for the first two or three weeks noe would refuse to talk and eat. this really frustrated ren, and these two months (especially the first one) is probably the worst moments of their relationship and most violent. ren was still trying to figure out what exactly he wanted out of noe—it wasn't until he almost killed them doing a stream that he realized he loved them.

after the incident, he really started trying to make admends and not be so... well, strade-like towards them. (when he realized he was being like strade, he had a complete mental break) shortly after, stockholm syndrome began to set in—noe was just grateful that anyone actually wanted to spend time with them, and they just ended up falling for him.

since noe actually has a... semi-positive force in their life now, their depression and anxiety disorders improved immensely. arguably, they're doing better than before ren kidnapped them.

im also toying with the idea of ditching noeren eventually just becoming a normal couple in canon and ren grooming noe to be an assistant or a favorite on what becomes fox's streams. the idea of perpetuating this cycle of like, inescapable violence and horror is so appealing but also. i want ren to get better :( the duality of men

[mygwenchan]

Stray thoughts while watching Love Syndrome III - EP5

Day wore that cast for weeks or even months... yeah I wouldn't want to touch it, that thing is nasty

The strippers are a nice touch though hehe

Jealous Day is jealous. He really doesn't want anyone to look at his man

Yes please, everyone take something off! Itt should start with his wig 🤣

Ohhh~ Itt was totally into that thing with the belt, what a naughty boy 😉

Cue Mac & Nan: Yeah, sorry folks. But it you see something like this, call the police ASAP and get that poor boy out of there. That's even beyond bad bdsm etiquette. Mac, my love, you should just castrate Nan. Maybe that would help

What's with the 70s porn music lol And suddenly everyone is making out ✨Is this a party or an orgy, who knows~

YES MAC throw that water into his face, baby! Throw the glass as well, fuck it, throw the whole bottle! Well, at least Day seems to feel a little bad for Mac, everyone else just ignores the situation (fuck them tbh)

Acts of service in the bedroom. We like to see it. They really need to have Long shirtless at least once per episode, huh? Maybe it's part of his contract? Maybe they knew his abs would save the series lol. They are nice abs though, I have to admit

Cuddle time~ That's cute

Flashback time~ The confusion is real, Day's as well as mine. Also, that kid Salmon is a shipper, they're really starting early these days 🤣

Sorry Day, but Itt is right. Car racing while being in that poor health condition is just asking for an accident to happen

Oh, Mac is back! Sweety, grab a car and run them all over. Just a suggestion

Itt fainted again, didn't see that one coming tbh. Was it too hot for him? Was he too stressed out? Probably both. Dude needs a vacation

Cute moment in the office. We like to see it. But Day, don't just answer Itt's call, not cool man. How did Itt later on know that it was Ball who called though? Ah jealous Day is jealous again. My dude, chill. Your boy isn't going anywhere

You go tell him, Itt! Day doesn't even try to remember you...

Oh? Looks like Itt is getting sick again. I feel him, I always get sick when I'm too stressed out, fever and all. Don't recommend. Also, I officially love Nik: "According to what I've studied, I think I can diagnose you. You're likely just sick!" LOL

Day: "Why does he love someone terrible like me?" Because it's the Stockholm Syndrome, baby~ 🎉✨

Not Nik suggesting that Itt got a fever cause he's on his period. DUDE XD He is the most character ever

Are they ever going to get into that car, or? Ah, now Day has another flashback and bad headache... Hmm, maybe that's why there are so many side characters? They're needed to hold Day and Itt when those idiots faint again

Tiny Itt curled up on the bed 🥰

Day "You can't take a shower, you're sick." Oh oh? Does that mean what I think it means?

YES, THE MAGICAL BL TOWEL MADE A COMEBACK!! They did skip the gay checkered sheets though, so one point deducted for that one

Most unhinged moment of this episode: Day taking a shower FULLY CLOTHED. Come on production folks, that would've been THE perfect excuse to show us Long's abs again, ah...

More fainting to come in the next episode. Stay tuned~

[evilwriter37]

The other idea was that the riders are all captured and held prisoner on Viggo's flag ship, their dragons all kept on another ship to keep them from escaping. Viggo wants Hiccup to join him and so intends on playing the long game. At first he keeps Hiccup and the riders seperate, never telling one how either of the others is doing. Hiccup is kept in the captain's quarters with Viggo, while the other riders are kept down in one of the dragon cells below the crew quarters. Viggo is civil with Hiccup, almost friendly even, treating him as if he were a member of his crew. Feeding him well, talking to him as an equal, playing Maces and Talons with him, and even letting the younger man peruse his personal library as he wished. He had even had a second bed brought in just as a cherry on top. While just below them, the riders were fed on scraps the crew wouldn't even feed the dragons they hunted and only had a single pile of hay and a thin blanket to share amongst all 5 of them. Viggo wasn't pushing himself on Hiccup in any capacity, wasn't making demands. Once there was even an inkling of trust, be it faux or not, the real games began. Viggo let Hiccup wander the ship - always above deck and always with eyes on him, wether the smaller viking knew it or not. If he behaved and didn't cause trouble or try to escape he was left alone to his own devices. If he did though, the riders were punished in his stead severely, and Hiccup was made to watch. Ryker took that to the extreme, usung any little thing he could as an excuse. Hiccup hated watching his friends suffer, apologizing to them profusely. They kept strong though, assumimg that Hiccup was still woking on a way to get them all out. Eventually though, Hiccup stops trying. When he's good Viggo rewards him; He would give the riders more creature comforts: pillows, blankets, better food, cleaner water, new clothes.

After a few months, when Viggo thinks Hiccup has come far enough along and the fight has all but left him. He even gifts the boy his dragon back. Of course he takes the prosthetic tail fin so they can't fly, but it's a gift Hiccup practically worships him for giving. He asks after the other dragons and it's revealed they were being taken care of. Maybe not as well as the riders would personally, but they weren't being mistreated. From here out, Hiccup is granted permission to go see his friends. Not that he does that often, the guilt of giving up weighs heavy when he looks in their eyes. He can't stomach telling them he isn't trying anymore. Viggo is relatively sure that Hiccup is under his thumb by this point and it's just a matter of time. Slowly he starts to integrate Hiccup into his crew, disguised as small busy work to keep him from getting bored. He learned early on that a bored Hiccup, was a dangerous Hiccup. To both himself, and anyone around him. It's around here that likely a sort of Stockholm syndrome starts to slowly set in. He starts to see Viggo in a more positive light, even coming to the alarming realization that he might actually like Viggo. He can't remember the last time he had felt anything remotely close to romantic for Astrid, even though before they had been stuck on this ship for Thor knew how long at ghis point they had been engaged. That scared him. When had his affections shifted from Astrid to Viggo? He couldn't let either party know. He would take it to his grave. Except that he's a terrible lier. And by now, Viggo can read him like a book.

Viggo's plan comes to a head that night, while Hiccup is struggling with his revelation he says something along the lines of "I've noticed you've been in a messure of some distress today, I'd like to show a bit of fait and offer you an outlet. As long as you promise to come back, and you take someone with you, you can have Toothless' tail fin back and go for a flight." Viggo knows no one on his ship will agree, that it will inevitably end up being the two of them, because the chance to fly with his dragon again will be too much to refuse, even on pride. It's while they're flying and Hiccup is physically relaxing in Viggo's arms at the feeling of the cold wind in his hair and the sound of Toothless' wings in his ears, (the smell of Viggo's cologne in his nose) that Hiccup lets it slip that he might in fact be attracted to him. And that with that bit in the open all of the insecurities of his friends finding out and hating him, thinking he was a traitor just tumble out of his mouth like word vomit. It's what Viggo has been waiting for. He treds lightly, not wanting to spook him, but tells him that his interest is not one sided. That he would not reject him should he want to pursue a relationship.

"If you promise to stay with me, to join my crew, I will let your friends go free. Their dragons as well." Viggo says with full sincerity. "If you betray me,and leave, I can not promise that Ryker will not kill each and every one of them. If you stay, they will have my protection."

At this point the main idea is done and the sub idea was Stoick starting tonbe worried that he hadn't heard from any of the riders in quite some time and when the others return to the edge - because of course Hiccup accepts - they tell him thayvhe sacrificed himself for them. They all try to organize a rescue for him from Viggo. If he tells them of his new found attraction or not could be up to you.

Because my brain likes to add angst it thought to pepper in some sort of repressed gay panic for Hiccup (that maybe only Snotlout keys in on if he tells them. Astrid would also be mad at being very suddenly essentially dumped for Viggo of all people) due to the expected stress Stoick put on Hiccup to "find a nice woman and settle down, and have an heir of your own." That Viggo now has to gently navigate, is more than happy to do, if it means he gets what he wants. Hiccup would be surprised at how gently Viggo regards him, how understanding he is of the situation, and it would probably make his delusion of "attraction" deepen.

I love this!!!! Ooooh, the manipulation is thick in this one. Gotta love it when Viggo manipulates people and plays mind games like that.

This does sound like it would be a multichapter story though. I already have 2 longer multichapter fics going with a short one on the side as well. I’m sorry, but I just do not have the time to write this.

However, I will keep the idea stowed away, should the time and inspiration ever strike me. Thank you for tickling my inspiration and for giving me more Vigcup to think about!

[waitingforwinterwinds]

ASOS; Steel and Snow: 15 JON II (pages 202-219)

Jon counts the giants, enjoys the latest songfic interlude, then has to answer some hard questions as Mance's scouts discover the aftermath of the Epilogue at the Fist.

-

"Big enough for you?" Snowflakes speckled Tormund's broad face, melting in his hair and beard.

gentle like a lover's kiss ahem. sorry, I just came from some pure, 300% crack fic in another fandom, my brain is... I might need a moment. Just got to remind myself Tormund is older, and Jon is younger, than their show counterparts.

... yep, that seems to have worked, I think the giggle-brain is off. We'll see if it stays that way.

In Old Nan's stories, giants were outsized men who lived in colossal castles, (...) These were something else, more bearlike than human, and as wooly as the mammoths they rode. Seated it was hard to say how big they turly were. Ten feet tall maybe, or twelve, Jon thought. Maybe fourteen, but no taller. Their sloping chests might have passed for those of men, but their arms hung down too far, and their lower torsos looked half again as wide as their upper. Their legs were shorter than their arms, but very thick, and they wore no boots at all; their feet were broad splayed things, hard and horny and black. Neckless, their huge heavy heads thrust forward from between their shoulder blades, and their faces were squashed and brutal. Rats' eyes no larger than beads were almost lost within folds of horny flesh, but they snuffled constantly, smelling as much as they saw. They're not wearing skins, Jon realized. That's hair. (...) And Joramun blew the Horn of Winter, and woke the giants from the earth. (...) The song never says if the horn can put them back to sleep.

Huh. GRRM gave us something so alien, something ancient and primal, and D&D gave us... well:

A more handsome Qui-gon Jin in skins. (Went looking for Wun Wun reference pictures and made myself sad. It's okay, they only killed him off in the show because they didn't want to use their budget for the cg needed to paste him into the shots. he's fine. don't tell me if he's not. Let me have this.)

D&D suck at their job = 🍷 ... hmmm... Horn of Winter = 🥛

I am a man of the Night's Watch, he reminded himself. So why did he feel like some blushing maid. He spent most of his days in Ygritte's company, and most nights as well. ... Lately, though, he was noticing some other things. When she grinned, the crooked teeth didn't seem to matter. And maybe her eyes were too far apart, but they were a pretty blue-grey color, and lively as any eyes he knew. Sometimes she sang in a low husky voice that stirred him. And sometimes by the cookfire when she sat hugging her knees with the flames waking echoes in her red hair, and looked at him, just smiling... well, that stirred some things as well. But he was a man of the Night's Watch, her had taken a vow.

So at the moment, it does seem like his lack of interest is more about the vow, than actual lack of interest, but, at the same time, it's never going to be that simple because Jon is undercover, and any relationship between them would be under false pretenses, with possible Stockholm flavouring on the side.

(Stockholm Syndrome isn't real, but you all know what I mean when I say it. Clarifying that: apparently Stockholm Syndrome was originally invented to discredit a woman (a bank teller) after a bank hold up, during which time the only person with any power over the event who wasn't (effectively) fully prepared for her to die in the event, was one of the bank robbers. The "negotiation expert" who had a psych background and had actually made everything worse every time he opened his mouth, invented what would later come to be called Stockholm Syndrome, because she (the bank teller) tried to tell the world he sucked at his job. As far as I know, it's not really a recognised thing in the psych field itself, you only really see it bandied about with cops and feds and the like. That said, humans really will attempt to pack bond with anything, even under duress, and even subconsciously. Alpha Male Swag Bros, miss me with your Lone Wolf Bullshit.)

Although, while we're on the subject:

Hey Robb! Look how easy it is to keep it in your pants for a vow.

I know, I know, he was emotionally compromised, I'm being mean to him. Too mean, especially given... future relationship evolution. That, may or may not, go on to seal his doom. and the doom of his entire faction.

Varamyr Sixskins, a small mouse of a man whose steed was a savage white snow bear that stood thirteen feet tall on its hind legs. And wherever the bear and Varamyr went three wolves and a shadowcat came following.

"Sixskins" because he can warg into the skins of five animals? So he has six skins including his human skin? Pokemon, gotta wear 'em all.

If that is the case, I've got to wonder if being the recipient of a warg changes the subtle nature and awareness of the animal for the five creatures to be ... well maybe not safe for public, but tamed enough I suppose.

... Jon's making a good point, Mance's warriors being spread out means they have no solid defense anywhere along the train, but, given that it's a refugee caravan in reality, it's actually pretty smart to spread the warriors out. It ensures that where ever a threat comes from, there will be someone close by to respond quickly, and given everything, the only things around that could cut through the host quickly and violently enough to make the warriors pointless no matter how closely group they are, would be maybe the Watch, but more likely: The Others and their Wights.

"Ooooooh, I am the last of the giants, my people are gone from the earth."

oh.

The video I grabbed Wun Wun screenshots from was set to this song. I'm not crying. you're crying. Okay, It's me. I'm crying.

Gosh, I was literally just listening to this song and I was thinking "fuck this slaps, came straight for my feels, this has to be a fan song right? specifically written for this? It's too perfect not to be."

and it was GRRM! He wrote it!

... and D&D fucking cut it from the show like it meant nothing. They cut so much of the music from the show, like the books have had at least two, three songfic chapters by now, plus there's been, what? a dozen references to music going on in the background of various scenes, music and song is so present in A Song of Ice and Fire, you'd think D&D would have kept more of it. Oh, but I guess singing is boring when you can shove in more blood spray and cool sword action.

D&D suck at their job = 🥛

There were tears on Ygritte's face when the song ended. "Why are you weeping?" Jon asked. "It was only a song. there are hundreds of giants, I've just seen them." "Oh, hundreds," she said furiously. "You know nothing, Jon Snow. you- JON!"

The only reason, that I am not currently taking another drink, and/or smashing D&D's kneecaps with a steel chair, is because while D&D turned this line into a meme about Jon's sex knowledge, they also turned it into an evolving meaning line. (Where in as the line is repeated, its nuance and meaning changes, or the characters'/readers' relation with it does.)

Because, D&D made this line so memeable, but it is so rage filled? Like, Ygritte is so (justifiably and rightfully) angry at Jon's ignorance here.

Jon says 'hundreds,' but we aren't given an exact number here. Fun Fact: a species with a population of 250 mature adults or less is considered Endangered and at risk of Extinction. Fun Fact: a species which has lost between 50 and 70% of its average population can also be considered endangered.

That's just talking about the giants that are here, now. I'm getting vibes that these are either not the giants from the songs, the giants know their days are numbered, or this song is old and the giants have come so close to extinction in the past that any of them being alive now is a miracle.

Jon doesn't know, I don't know, but Jon is making light of Ygritte's emotional response because he doesn't know, and Ygritte has every right to be upset by that.

But No, D&D saw a chance for a sex joke.

... oh shit, BIRB OF DEATH SCRITCHIES!!!

Actually, given how much of himself Bran's been loosing in the warg, I wonder if keeping your sense of self is something you can teach, so that even after death, the warg in the bird knows what he's doing, or if the death grudge is just so strongly imprinted on the warg, that even lost to the animal instincts and mind of the bird, the hatred for Jon lives on, even if the warg/bird no longer understands why he hates this human specifically.

"There were three hundred of us." "Us?" Mance said sharply. "Them. Three hundred of them." Whatever is asked, the Halfhand said. So why do I feel so craven?

Probably because you've just realised you are alone with no back up from the Watch, telling Mance is different when it's a ploy you can justify as orders, compared to now when the plan, such as it is, has been stripped away and all that's left is handing over information to save your own life because your people are already dead.

I do love that he spared a moment to wonder after Sam. besties!

(... It would be a little funny (to me) if he mentioned the worry about Sam out loud, and Ygritte and Tormund (and others) got the impression that Jon's just not into girls. Cock works fine, he's just not into girls. ... except with how this series treats non-straight sexualities, and the free folk's focus on siring strong children. meh, free folk are free-love/love-is-love positive AU)

... I can't decide how I feel about the book Ygritte/Jon ship.

On one hand, she is protecting him, lying to say he's more loyal to the free folk than he is, at her own risk. But then she turns around and uses that to make him feel indebted, even if that wasn't her intention, because, on the other hand, like Tormund was saying earlier in the chapter, by the ways of the free folk, Jon has 'stolen' Ygritte, by her own culture, they're effectively in a relationship already, Jon did the equivalent of courting.

I don't know, I think, book version, I'd feel more comfortable seeing more shifting in their power dynamics, a sense of equality and friendship grown free of deception, some time apart and a reunion in which they're actually meeting on equal footing before any kind of sexual shenanigans happened.

(I'm just one of those people who thinks fully informed consent is The sexiest thing in the universe. followed closely by competence.)

Show ship had more appearance of equal footing, and the actor chemistry carried a lot of the ship weight for me. There was more return flirting before they wound up in the cave, and afterwards, the regrets (felt like they) were about ending up on opposing sides, and then never getting a chance to reconcile before she was dying in his arms.

[demcnsinmymind]

everyone be out there talking about their demon/host combo sorta being besties and a symbiont power couple, meanwhile there's the boy, the az and me. And though I also do have a symbiont late post canon verse which is super fun, for the most part I am here to tell u that no, I am boring and do not have a real symbiont power couple on this blog

the az is extremely obsessed, manipulative as hell, chaotic as shit and that is all.

Like, it's important to me to stress that this is not your typical supernatural-y type of possession either. Lance let it in. He's not exactly trapped in his mind 24/7 and it is not in charge 24/7 and it's not forcing him to do stuff all the time. It has never physically harmed him and would never torture or mentally hurt him in any way. It does want him its version of 'safe' and 'comfortable' and it does want him alive, and it enjoys letting him be in charge most of the time because to it it's like watching your fav tv show BUT

There still is a severe imbalance of power and no real equality here and there never will be. Both of them will abuse each other's perks for their own gains regardless of whether it's useful or good for the other. Az will keep gobbling his mental trauma right up for food and funnsies and it will keep using him as its home for comfort and for the heck of it. Lance in return will keep manipulating its protectiveness and obsession to trigger its powers against others and eventually will use its powers all by himself to his own benefit, to bascially become OP just so no one can ever hurt him again. Both their number one goal is to keep him alive, yes, but other than that, Azzy's extreme obsession with him is mainly unhealthy and nothing positive. It'll kill people over it. It'll try to destroy genuine relationships to keep him all to itself and just itself. And Lance's attachment to it is based on nothing but fear of abandonment and trauma aka it's a trauma bond/stockholm's syndrome. And he's the type of character who doesn't have many friends, doesn't know how to make genuine friends, is terrible at keeping them, and post canon, is afraid of having them and hurting them, so he's trapped in a way since this leaves him with Az as his only 'friend' which he doesn't want to lose.

Not throwing any shade at anyone, just thought it'd be fun to make that a little clearer because I myself tend to forget the idea at times and catch myself thinking "okay but maybe Azzy is right and it really isn't so bad actually, it just wants to keep him safe and protected, so maybe it actually really is his friend" and that is true, but it still fucked up my friends because the motive and intentions behind it are important, and let me tell u those are not at all about Lance but all about itself. Because we all know if it truly cared about him and his wellbeing and just wanted him to be safe and happy, it would leave him alone if he got better. But the thing is that it won't EVER leave him again because it is way too obsessed with him and the endless food supply of his time paradox and suffering and it literally just wants him because that's all it cares about. Not needing or reason or anything else. Just endless hunger and want.

Having said all of that, I still can't picture a post canon reality where either of the two actually get rid of each other. They're stuck with each other either way - for better or worse. Especially since Lance literally needs it in his head because otherwise there would be nothing in place to keep the physical damage to his brain away. It's literally like a pacemaker, and that just adds up to the 'hostage' situation without it being a true one. It's just...a mess all around.

[meigui-jin]

Let's Discuss 'Yandere':

- *all of this situation for research purposes of my character analysis of many 'yanderes' present in media*

I know this sint a post but I'm having massive writers block at the moment- so here's an analysis IG?

Warning!: The topics mentioned are extremely disturbing, Real life issues, talk of sexual perversion and dependency, yandere in general.

Hello, I know this isn't a post but I'd like to talk about it. Also to get to know me a little bit- more or so how I'm going to write about yandere characters or the topic in general.

Though I am no expert in psychology, though I have done a fare amount of research and some personal experience with some of the parts. (I.E, abuse, dependency ect.)

Alright- now let's get into the meat of this.

What is a 'Yandere'?

Well I don't believe that the feeling or expression this word describes exists- let me explain.

As I see multiple similarities between multiple different phenomena for yandere to just not be a stand alone definition or cut and dry.

Though it shares it's main part of concept with the Lima syndrome. To grossly oversimplify it's where someone's captor- (Or person in power) gains positive attraction to their victims (a person not in power). Which is the case in most yandere depictions. Either it be physically, mentally, literally, educationally, socially- you name it! The Yandere has to have some sort of advantage over the victim. Which calling the victim 'darling' is kind of weird but im not here to all about that.

This is a broad statement since this can account for if the yandere is better or the best conpaired to their 'darling' in any way that sticks out. Like earlier examples such as physically- maybe they are pretty strong on their own right and some way somehow their 'darling' isn't? Or maybe mentally, they see themselves better equipped than object of obsession is.

This also goes hand in hand with narcissistic mindsets that they are better than their obsession in some way. That they have a duty to them due to their own inability to do anything about it as the yandere sees. This also can be expressed through self loathing as well. That they are inadequate in something, and their 'darling' is. So they put them on a pedestal- which we'll talk about later. Or that they see their obsession as a good thing or the only good thing that they should care about due to their inability. Depending on the type of obsession the yandere has.

Which is why when there is no power imbalance there is no grounds for the captor to grasp onto. So when people make 'yanderes' who have literally no advantage over their victim it doesn't really make sense to me. But fiction is all about dramatics, honestly exaggerate those flaws or imbalances then you REALLY got a good base for your yandere. It can even be the flaw of the yandere- maybe they aren't mentally well, (which they aren't anyways) and that their obsession is finding ways to cope with their trauma. Or that they are better socially. It can be many reasons as to why your yandere s, well, yandere?

Though in not every case this can be made. Since not ever case can be cut and dry with a power imbalance. So what's another way you can make the yandere- yandere? Paraphilia.

Well lack of a better term it's when a person has sexual desires, is aroused by or having intercourse with an unwilling or non consenting partner. Such as some cases of voyeurism. As well as some other examples such a as exhibitionism or frotteurism. Rare cases show yanderes having voyeuristic behavior as well, as well as all examples in one. Though this is mostly sexual in practice it can also be with a domestic perversion, that they are delusional about the quality- or state of the relationship that they think this is fine. Okay even, that what they are doing isn't bad. Though delusional yanderes don't pose paraphilia within their own minds- but it's with every yandere. Unless their obsession shows signs of Stockholm syndrome- but that's still not consensual since the feelings came out of trauma.

The yandere has to find something appealing about their obsession, which they hyper fixate on to the point of fetishizing it. It's the thing that's most attractive to them- sexual or not. It can be to the color of their obsession's eyes, their skin, an image of a domestic life, physical touch, their voice, habits- anything. It can be more than one too, nothing is ever just one thing. Though it can be both sexual and domestic (any % of each) or purely sexual, or domestic.

Though it can just be an attraction to being, what their obsession is and that they exist and their mear exsistance is captivating the yanderes soul in a death grip. That they can't or will fight due to the sheer euphoria it meddles their mind into- mush really. This is true for any case. Enough for them to throw away moral to chase that feeling and never let go.

This also comes to a sense of entitlement, anger at the supposed suppression of their love. They would feel insulted, offended, or any form of pity- at themselves or their obsession due to the rejection of whatever their delusion makes it. Protection, love, utter devotion, pleasure or any positive trate the yandere sees that their obsession lacks and can only get from the yandere, that they need them, it would never be the same with another. They would do anything to keep this dependency, gaslight, force, intimidation you name it.

Or the yandere finds something they need from their obsession, going through harsh withdrawls when denied access to whatever it may be. And would do anything to get it. As per the prior examples. If it gets so bad that they might even kill for it.

Though murder is something that can only be used sparingly- and with impact. So they probably wouldn't murder just anyone.

No, they'd probably do something horrible- torture the closest person their obsession has to get the message across, or, depending on their personality they would probably snap and attack any living thing that they see a threat. All so they can feel that gross euphoric ecstasy. They'll even kill their own family- no one gives them the intoxicating rapture of pure joy, pleasure or warmth than thier obsession does. So no one really matters to the yandere at this point. Then comfort you as if they'd done nothing wrong- remember all morals are lost in the haze. So deep into their own mind they don't even realize what theyer doing. Or they do- which doesn't make that much of a difference if they understand what thyer doing or not. Maybe a little pity- but the yandere who knows what they're doing is wrong would probably not care, that feeling of obsession and love that it would be a necessary evil. Most of what I've said would be a necessary evil to lucid yanderes.

Which brings in co-dependency/OCD, it can effect either the yandere, obsession or both. Where they feel a duty to their obsession that advises their utter devotion or they might just choke themselves. Anxiety when they've been away too long from their obsession without a momento of them. Separation is completely off the table with them. They would probably go on a rampage if that were to ever happen. Though calmer yandere's would have a higher tolerance to this- but everyone has a breaking point. Especially with the mental instability of yanderes as it is. They would also feel the need to protect their obsession, to a disgusting amount. If their obsession actually did something extremely bad the yandere would just deny, deny, deny. Like with their behavior.

They would never change their behaviors, it's too intoxicating to let go of if they even realize at all. They would gaslight their obsession, intentionally or not that there's nothing wrong with them, there's nothing wrong with this. They would even turn the people around them against their obsession, or they would turn their obsession on themselves. Depends on the type of person the yandere is. They would either be flamboyantly open about their 'relationship' with their obsession, be quiet but intimidatingly noticable about it or they keep their obsession out of public as much as possible.

With the yanderes that let other people breath around their obsession are the ones who has everyone wrapped around their finger. Comments on how cute their relationship is or that the obsession is crazy for reaching out for help, glued to the yanderes side at all times under their blazing gaze. Or the yanderes that breath down their obsession's neck whenever they dare step foot outside. Or the ones who keep them all cuddled/leashed up inside somewhere- waiting for the yandere to return, as if they step outside and risk a leg being broken or a missing persons case. Yanderes are good at keeping their behavior a secret in public, well, most are. Some just can't help it.

Escaping is almost impossible for most yanderes obsessions, it's mostly too late before they even realize what was even going on. Taken literally or metaphorically right under their noses. For reasons their minds would never understand completely from the twisted, dementedly sickly minds of their captors. Since most yanderes would be almost disgusted with themselves during the begining stages of their fall- hiding it from the world and themselves untill they could t help themselves but to indulge in it. 'one more time' turns into thousands. So it becomes a web of lies, unleased trauma, tension and possessive obsession woven into the art that is a yandere. A gruesome, yet captivatingly charming one. Like Icarus- someone who flew too high and was fated to fall.

------

Well that got extremely out of hand. Well this is just a part of the spectrum that I personally see yandere as. Since it's so broad I'll probably have to make a separate post boiling down the types into their bare bones to not make this longer than the bible... Anyways I hope this brought some light onto how I think yanderes are!

[faggot-billcipher]

th i literally do nawt get how so many people can still agree with anti rhetoric wihle seeing how lily orchard is. and knowing she is one of THE top influencer-like figures in the community. ibtch lied about finding a therapist who agreed with anti culture as her stepping stone. ivew legit only seen one ex anti have a case of a therapist hat legit promoted anti rhetoric. but that's it. only one experience isn't much vlaidity to work with. certianly not enough to justify murdering people over this shit irl the way so many antis are willing to do thoughtlessly. (murdering people will always be a bigger crime than fanfic sorry not sorry.) however i still think lily's stockholm syndrome fic and her other fics are ohrrid though and mainly because she actually uses them to groom minors into tinking that shit is okay to do irl. and uses those fics to tellk minors you should forgive rapists and pedophiles. since that is the most consistent moral in all of them. despite how lily's usual presence is in the anti community where she is the most aggressively anti forgiveness one in there. like the thing is i am not against people edploring incest and pedophilia in fictoin. i do it myseolf. my issue id when you use it to groom real people. because in that case the fic isn't inherently wrong. using it to groom someone is though. and can fall under non contact csa especially if you do it to a minor over texting. of course unfortunately online crimes are in muddy waters in terms of whether or not you can get someone convicted over them. this kind of shit can only get a predator like lily convicted if she's sharing like porn with real peo[le with minors. or sharing and making stylized nsfw art of real minors (which is what the actual "fictional csem" obscenity laws antis keep misrepresenting fall under btw not fanfic or fanart.) what shadman did to keemstar's daughter could actually fall under that. but yeah i digress....lily's fanfic a one isn't what's wrong, how she was using it was. and again i cannot get people seeing a bunch of big name antis including lily being exposed as total creeps irl so much recnetly and still want to side with anti rhetoric. how many more antis have to be exposed like this before you decide enough??

and not only that a huge amount of antis are still sidfing with lily on this. i even saw some saying that how lily sexually abused courtney wasn't a bg deal. and treated it like a joike in their tone. how are you going to act like bashing fanfic or fanart that depicts csa and pedophilia and adult/minor sihps is about protecting csa victims when this is the common attitude?? Simply becuase lily was super popular for years before this all got exposed. i know that could definitley not be me. i could not comfortably sit in a community that is that dismissive of one of lily's vicitms solely cuz he's lily's victim.

let's stop pretending the anti community treat proshippers the way they do because they're trying to normalize protecting csa victims. if that was true they would not be letting off lily scott free simply cuz shes lgbt and is popular in their community. antis just want to justify thinking it's okay to tell rape victims they're more likely to agree with their rapist for portraying rape in a way they didn't like in a story. that's all it's about. everything else they use to cover that is just padding gaslighting. and to also trick well meaning newbies to think the community actually has any victims best interest at heart more than they do. they do ont care about any victims. they only care aobut using victims as a meat shield and to tokenize them. everything happening with lily should heavliy prove that ocnsidering the huge number of antis still defending lily in all this and the vile vicitm blaming things they're saying aobut what happened to courtney. i don't directly support courtney anymore for personal reasons i'm ont getting into but like...that is still fucked up.

and is a line i'm not crossing in this whole mess no matter how i feel about courtney's recent behavior. two things can be true at once. that courtney's also a bad person in his own way and that his allegaiotn s against lily are still true. i think it's important to remember sometimes aubse trauma can make you develop fucked up moral sand coping mechanisms. doesn't mean it didn't happen at all.

anyways yeah fuck lily orchard and fuck her enabling stans too. i'm only willing to be forgiving to the ones that stop defending her ass. however i do hpoe the minors in lily's community are able to get the fuck out of dodge soon. because holy shit from what i've heard lily is abusing so many minors in her online spaces especially on discord. both sexually and non sexually. and also maybe we should all consider dropping anti rhetoric if this is what it turned into so qiuckly on accident.

because it's only going to get worse. and we're only going to see more situations like what lily's doing at the rate things are going. due to the social immunity a lot of adult antis get to be super creepy and inappropriate with minors in their chatrooms, blogs and forums. of course it's gonna result in a bunch of both intentoinal and opportunistic pedophiles when adult antis think they can't abuse in any way just by being antis (sounds kinda similar to lily's mentality doesn't it??) no person who thinks like that is going to realize they're crossing the line if they refuse to be open to being confronted even politely.

that's why i say anti culture feeds into this problem. and i hope more people realize this sooner because i can guarantee we're gonna see more cases coming out even after this about different adult antis. especially if nothing aobut tihs problem in anti culture spaces changes fast enough.

[ur-blxxdy-valentine]

(Delete the one that has the same first paragraph- i didnt mean to send that yet.....)

Beware to everyone huge trigger warning because this is a major trauma dump......

I love how my older brother is shit talking me and saying how much he hates me like i'm not even sitting next to him. I love how he's calling me retarded and he wishes that I would die and that if he ever has a kid i'm not allowed in it's life because I'm just going to fuck it up. I love how one of the only people I ever fucking cared about and the real reason why i'm still alive hates me so fucking much he wants me to kill myself..... I love how the person I was always by the side of, the closest to and was always by my side just admitted he wants me fucking dead and that he hates me.... great lol. I just lost both of my brother. He forgot I'm sitting right here..... literally 2 feet away from him.... and i'm fucking crying because I can't hold it in.... just tears falling down my face as i'm fucking mute. Why am I so fucking worthless

I feel it so bad.... deep in my bones.... he's one of three peoples opinions that actually matter to me.... my brother isn't shitty though...... idk..... i'm kind of used to it but idk why it gets me every time..... he's said stuff like that our entire lives but meh... yea idk...... all he cares abiut is his stupid pedophilic, disgisting, rapist, abusive fucking girlfriend. It's the worst stockholm syndrom story i ever heard.

He should be thanking me and be proud of me for not shooting her point blank in the fucking head after torturing her after all the shit she got him into, addicted to and put him through. I had a gun in my hand and she was right in front of me. I had the chance and god oh god are both of them lucky I didn't take it. Hilarious how we're each others ride or dies though. It doesn't matter what he'd do or did I'd be helping him every step of the way or alibing him for anything. Killing someone? Okay when where who? I got the equipment. Or oh you killed someone well shit, no second thought my first instinct is to cover for his ass. I've done it our entire childhood, he'd do the same for me....... hell I was having issues at school, he stalked and beat the living shit out of a kid for me..... he gathered his friends who are part of the literal mafia and cartel and beat the living shit out of the kids..... I have no clue where they went or what happened and all he told me was I didn't need to know.... I think they may be dead.....

All I am is because of him..... I wouldn't be who I am without him..... I don't think i'm ever going to get a better hand or a better life or better hand. I have a gut wrenching feeling life is just going to get shitter for me and I'm only 18....... eight fucking teen.... if i finally get something good it's a disaster in surprise..... my baby brother's birth for one. I waited 10-9 years for a baby sibling when my mom got pregnant and only got 8 horrible trecherous, traumatizing weeks of him being alive and hell and trauma for the rest of my life....... hell when I first lost my baby brother I tried killing myself and my older brother is the reason I'm alive besides him beating the shit out of me for trying to off myself and then threatned to kill me for doing so..... he held a gun to my head with the safety off, bullets in it and one in the chamber as he was close to pulling the trigger once.... he has tried killing me on multiple occasions between guns and knives to chemicals...... I'm shocked I'm still alive because the amount of chemicals i've digested should have killed me.... the amount of times I've blacked out from him choking me.....

So it fucking hurts. It hurts so fucking bad..... I have no clue what I did or what I have done..... All I've done is do everything for him, practically literally worship him with how devoted and deep I love him.... the bad thing is....... my love will never end or stop for him..... that's the pain..... Our relationship is so damaging but its the strongest and realest bond i've ever had...... (if it helps if you believe in astrology he's a Scorpio and i'm a Leo. And if you know anything about the compatibility, they love very strongly but are each other's kryptonite)

— ❤️‍🔥

i know everything i’ll say sounds probably repetitive to you at this point. i’m sure you’re aware of it. so just ignore me if i sound aggravating and repetitive 😭 but i know how much family means. family bonds are so painful because deep down we are just magnetically attached by nature. especially when our whole lives are filled with such negativity and pain, something that makes us feel even the slightest bit cared for can be something we latch onto. there’s a point though where it is not worth the pain that that person brings. your brother sounds extremely unwell. i know that naturally as his sister you want his approval more than anything. you want his love and just some ounce of family support. you will not get what you deserve from him. i’m only saying that because i know exactly how that’s like. the family drama i mentioned awhile ago is a bit of that. i’m begging for approval and attention from someone who doesn’t give a shit about how he’s actually supposed to treat me right now. the most painful thing is learning to move on from them. you don’t have to give up on your brother. you just have to understand at this moment, he is not the one you should be seeking anything positive from. the more hope you pin on him, the more you’re just going to disappoint and hate yourself. especially if he’s in a toxic relationship. i’m not gonna therapize you and be like “you should be seeking approval from yourself first 😍,” bc ohmygod is it the most annoying thing to hear when all you’ve done your whole life is hate yourself. so for now all i can say is force yourself to care for someone who actually cares for you. i know it’s easier said than done because people like us can’t help but want to push away those who are actually good to us. but sometimes you have to fake it till you make it. if it means anything, i’m always here for you. i’m staring at you with awe and appreciation. i think you’re amazing. i think you’re great. i’m seeing all that you do i’m truly proud.