#or worse that people notice my absence and are relieved or something

[cookinguptales]

If you’re still doing readings I would love one. I’m having a hard time right now with a lot of external stressors that are making me sad. Wondering about the path forward?

I'll be doing them all night. And once I inevitably fall asleep, I'll look at the ones that came in during my absence. The barn door doesn't shut until I wake up again. Don't worry, I'll post a notice when I'm done. I have to take breaks periodically because my eyes have started to act up a little, but I'm not finished yet.

All that said, I'm happy to do a reading and I'll be very glad if whatever I say helps you come up with your own path forward. But again, I can't give any real advice here; just say stuff that I hope you can find meaning in. 💜

(Judgement, Justice, The Empress)

Old friends coming together in new ways, huh...

Well. I think you're probably right in that things are tough right now. Judgement and Justice together usually call to a rough time.

Judgement, as I mentioned before, really means that the stage is set, the curtains are drawn, and the main event is about to start. Shit, in other words, is about to get real. Everything is coming together now, and the decisions you make now will have long-ranging consequences. Either for good or for ill.

Judgement can also be a moment of spiritual awakening, though, too. Everything has come to a head, and in the middle of all that chaos is a moment of understanding. I hope that moment comes to you, friend, and when it does, I hope that you can accept it.

Justice is a card of truth and fairness. It means that things are coming to their logical conclusion and no one can hide behind lies, not anymore. In a way, I think this is the card that people think Judgement is. It says that the time has come for the truth to come forward, and everyone will be judged exactly as they have earned. If you're a good person (and I see no reason to assume you're not, anon) then your efforts will be recognized. If someone has hurt you, perhaps, if they are not held to task for their sins, you will at least be able to find the healing that you are due.

But if you have done something bad... well, I guess that Justice and Judgement are not a promising combination.

Let's just assume that you'll be on the good side of this, though, shall we?

Either way, your last card is The Empress, and I won't lie when I say I was relieved to see it. This is a comforting card to end on, especially in times of strife. This card is extremely nurturing and understanding and wise. It's an understanding that, for better or for worse, comes from experience, and it's a wisdom that allows her to rule a room. But she rules with grace and with abundance. This is sometimes read as a nod to motherhood, but it's more.. caring and strength, I think. You have the potential to create and the potential to nurture and hopefully someone will take the time to nurture you as well.

All is not lost, and The Empress rules with clear-eyed kindness. She carries bounty in her arms, and whether you'll create it or receive it, it will come eventually.

As for a path forward... I suppose, with The Empress where she is, my advice is to try and be clearheaded through all this. Hopefully understanding will come to you, and you'll be able to use that understanding to create a kind and nurturing space -- for others as well as yourself.

And -- on a more serious note, anon, if you ever need someone to talk to? I'm usually around. Regardless of what the cards say, you never need to suffer alone. 💜

[cellophaine]

Mirrored Hearts

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Word Count: 2714

Warnings: None.

Author's Note: This fluff piece was the one that I had a bit of struggle with :( I hope you will enjoy it anyway!

As always, every likes, comments, reblogs, feedback and ask submissions are greatly appreciated! <3

Prompt requested by: the lovely dovey @psychedelic-star <3 I'm so sorry that it took me so long to respond to your prompt request!

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Some people said being young and in love was one of the most beautiful things that could happen in one's life.

You thought they were full of shit. It was convenient the way they left out what type of love that was. Because you were young, you were in love, yet, you were miserable. For your love was the unrequited kind that only you knew and no one else. What was it exactly, this feeling you had for Matt? It had been too long to call it a crush.

Worst of all, you knew better than pining for that one person you could not have. But you couldn't help it. You were in love. After all, love wasn't something you could handle with facts and logistics. For love was confusing, and it worked in its own mysterious way.

Your affection for Matt had only grown since your freshman days at Columbia University. It transformed into something bigger, into something even you couldn't tame. If you were blessed with the eyes of a mighty immortal being, you could see the blossom with its head hung heavy, spilling over your chest; its petals scattered around your feet, leading you to the destination you always longed for.

And for that exact reason, you couldn't tell anyone, not even Foggy. He was the friend anyone would be lucky to have, bless his soul, but he could make your situation worse had he known about your feelings for his other best friend. He would try to help you, and you couldn't take the risk of losing Matt if he didn't feel the same way.

You blamed on those late nights studying in the university library when it was only you and him. You caught yourself sneaking glances at Matt more often as time went on. You watched the way his slender fingers tracked the Braille lines. The way he pushed his hair back when they fell over his eyes. The way his hand came up to fix the collar of his shirt. And so much more of the little things you had accumulated through time. You wished it was your skin underneath his fingertips instead, imagining how it would feel if he touched you — tenderly, softly, like a touch from an old lover that you knew too well, that feeling of home, of bone-deep affection. You craved it, even though you knew it was something you could never ask of him. You had wanted to get it out of your chest, but it was too late, for there was a danger that seemed to appear out of nowhere, a new and beautiful danger — Elektra. Every intention of confessing withered, gathering in a heap of ash in your chest. You forced yourself to pull away, to put distance between you two. It worked, but not for long since something like your constant absence could not escape Matt's notice.

"I missed my friend." He said.

And somehow, that felt even worse. You apologized, made up some excuses, and you knew Matt knew they were all fiction. He didn't pressure you any further. And things seemed fine again. Tense, but just fine.

The day he told you about his breakup, you couldn't help but feel relieved, and you condemned yourself for feeling that way. You hadn't seen Elektra since, and Matt didn't want to talk about her much. As time went on, she faded away as graduation neared, with exams and all the worries of securing a stable future. Graduating, interning and declining job positions for Landman and Zack, and opening your own firm. Things that seemed impossible, but the three of you did it all, going through everything together, just like how you were now, drunk on cheap beers, sitting in a booth at Josie's, on the occasion of signing with a client who paid you with actual money instead of living chickens and bananas.

"Now that we have money coming in, you know what we should buy? A spaceship."

You shot Foggy a bizarre look as Matt laughed at his friend's ludicrousness.

"Are you sure? I heard the traffic up there is horrendous. With aliens and such."

Matt took a sip of his beer, and you tried not to pay too much attention to his lips. Or the way his throat bobbed. So you averted your gaze to Foggy, picking up where the conversation was left off.

"You know what you can buy? Bagels. You did miss them a lot when we left Landman and Zack."

You added, nodding sympathetically at Foggy.

"Correction. I still do. God, they were perfect."

While Foggy mulled over the loss of the bagels, you observed Matt with a slight tilt of your head. Matt was leaning back into the seat, his posture relaxed. The sleeves of his white dress shirt were rolled up around his elbow, putting his fuzzy forearms on display. The top button of his shirt was opened, letting a glimpse of his chest through. You swallowed, once again looking away to avoid thinking about how his chest look. His face was flushed with alcohol, and you couldn't help but think how he looked effortlessly good tonight. Or any time. He always did. And it didn't do anything to help with your so-called crush for him.

You felt a rush of blood on your face. Gosh, he still had the same effect on you after all these years. You should be moving on already. The reminder made itself known again. You cleared your throat, standing up abruptly.

"I'm getting a fresh drink. Do you guys want anything?"

"Same for me."

Foggy took a sip of his drink and confirmed with you. You turned to Matt, waiting for a response. The look he gave you was odd. Curious, dotted with concern. You asked him again.

"Matt? You want anything?"

Matt seemed to snap out of the trance he was in, composing himself with a visible effort.

"Yeah, I'll take the same thing."

Leaving the table, you brushed off Matt's strange reaction. The bar was packed with people, so you waited patiently after a knowing nod from Josie. You tapped your fingers absentmindedly as you waited when the guy sitting at the bar leaned in, leaving a respectful distance between you, catching your attention with a small 'hey'.

He extended his hand, flashing you a charming smile.

"Hi, I'm Gideon."

You clasped his hand, offering your name in return. You fell into an easy conversation, finding yourself surprised at how much you were enjoying his company. When Josie put your drinks down in front of you, you were almost sad to leave. Almost.

"I have to go back to my table. My friends are waiting."

"Of course. Would you like to continue our conversation elsewhere, some other time?"

You hesitated. You thought about how you had denied a lot of potential dates in a hopeless wait for something that would never come. You exhaled deeply. And nodded. The smile Gideon gave you lit up his whole face; the dimples on his cheeks deepened.

After exchanging phone numbers, you went back to your table with the drinks in your hands. Foggy raised a brow at you, looking at Gideon's direction pointedly.

"What?"

"Has our partner finally taken a lover? Who's that cutie you were talking to?"

Foggy wiggled his brows; a teasing tone crept into his voice. You played it off with a shrug of your shoulders.

"Oh! That's Gideon. And maybe. I don't know. It's been a long time since I last did this dating stuff."

You pushed the drinks towards your friends, failed to notice the way Matt tensed up underneath the calm exterior he put on. The curve of his lips slightly dipped as if your casual remark was a rotten fruit on his tongue. The night soon wrapped up after that with little words exchanged between you two, and you couldn't figure out the cause of Matt's silence.

Another late night, with the same guy who had been by your side for almost a decade. Hell's Kitchen was loud and chaotic, but when was it anything else? All you knew was right here, right now, in Matt's apartment, you were tucked away in your own world. You and Matt riffled through the mountain of documents, reading, taking and exchanging notes. You ordered takeout, had dinner in the comfortable silence; the ambience of the city of millions was a whisper in the back of your mind as you went through the paperwork.

Your eyes watered from running over the ink lines, page after page, and it only seemed to get longer. You muffled a yawn into the back of your hand, blinking rapidly to chase the sleep away. Matt's fingers stopped on the Braille document as he turned to face you with just an arm's length away.

"Are you tired? We can call it a night here, and I can take you home."

Always a gentleman. You thought.

You gave him a tired smile anyway, knowing he couldn't see it.

"It's okay. I want to push through."

You went back to the stack of paper in your hand, tapping your cheeks lightly to wake yourself up. But the drowsiness persisted. You had to trace back on some sentences because the words started losing their meaning. If only … you could close your eyes right now. But ... but ... your idle mind struggled to come up with an excuse. Matt's apartment was warm; you were tired, and you gave in. Your vision darkened at the edges, and you let sleep pulled you under.

Your eyes blinked open, fluttering a few times so you could see what was going on. You weren't sitting anymore. Your view was tilted sideways, your cheek was pressed up against something solid, and your sense of smell was filled with the scent of clean soap, of familiarity, of ... Matt. You turned your head, and a concerned-looking Matt gazed down at you, his soft eyes settled on the bridge of your nose. You let yourself dared to imagine the day when you could lay your head on his lap like this, his hand stroking your cheek affectionately as he lowered his head, pulling you in for a kiss …

But that could only be a dream. You brought yourself back to reality, sitting up with a deep yearning for his warmth again.

"I'm so sorry. Did I make you feel uncomfortable?"

You weren't sorry. You wanted to soak in all the physical touches as much as you could from Matt. You knew you were treading on thin ice. With a wrong step, you would fall into the freezing water, and you weren't sure if you could survive the fall. Matt placed a hand on your shoulder, his touch tender. You could feel the heat of his palm over your blouse. Too much, too close, and you can't ...

"Hey, hey, I'm fine. I would never be uncomfortable around you."

"Still, I shouldn't have dozed off like that. Besides, you're hard at work, and I'm slacking off."

Matt swiped his thumb back and forth; the fabric rustled softly and silently on your skin, amplifying the heat you felt on your face.

"I'm glad you got some shut-eye."

You could feel just how much you had gotten closer to one another. Your breath hitched at the realization, but your body demanded you to stay put. Matt parted his lips slightly, just enough for a hint of tongue swiped over his upper lip. He swallowed hard, his hand inched upward to your cheek, pushing your hair back and tucked the soft tendrils of your hair behind your ear. His fingers brushed over your ear, which was already heated up at Matt's attention. How would Matt react if you decided to risk everything for the feel of his lips —

Your phone alerted a new message, startled you both. Matt pulled his hand back instantly, clearing his throat. You silently cursed at whoever that was for ruining the moment, just when you thought you could go for it. You hastily searched for your phone under the document disaster. The message shown on your phone was an indifferent surprise.

"Hey, it's Gideon. I had a good time talking to you the other night. I would love to take you out on a date :)"

You sighed. Gideon was nice and respectful, but he wasn't Matt.

"Is it of anything important?"

You darken the screen on your phone.

"No, it's just Gideon from Josie's the other night. He's asking me out on a date."

You didn't know why you were telling him this. What were you looking for?

"Are you going to ... accept?"

Matt spoke; his voice was just a touch lower and rough on the edge. If you didn't know any better, you would say he sounded nervous.

"I don't think so. I don't think our firm can afford it right now. I'm just going to say no."

A rueful smile pulled on the corner of his mouth.

"You can take a night off. It's more than okay."

"Well, I don't want to put things on yours and Foggy's shoulders. Maybe I can reschedule with him some other time."

You felt a touch on your elbow as you typed out a response to Gideon. Matt's voice sounded different now. Husky. Small but more than enough for you to hear.

"I know I have no right to ask you of this. But, please, don't go on a date with him."

You blinked. Once. Twice. Thrice. After determining that no matter how many times you blinked, Matt did indeed, say that.

"What? Why?"

"I … I can't say."

He stammered, and you pressed on. Why would Matt disapprove of someone he hadn't even met?

"Why? Tell me."

He pressed his lips together as if it could stop him from saying what he was thinking.

"Aren't we friends, Matt? You know what people say: friends don't keep secrets from each other."

Matt turned his head away from your direction as if to avoid your gaze.

"We are friends. But what I want to say might change that. And I don't want to lose you."

You reached forward, clasping his arm in your hand.

"Matt, there's nothing you say can chase me away. As you said, we are friends."

You repeated his words. He winced slightly; his hand came up to rest against yours. His mouth opened, closed, and opened again. This time, his words came out in an earnest tone, so honest and raw that it hurt.

"That's the problem. I don't want to be your friend. Not anymore. I haven't wanted to for a very long time. Longer than you could know."

Your heart dropped to your stomach as his words echoed back and forth in your skull. What did he mean? Did you do something to upset him?

"Matt, whatever that I did, please tell me."

"No, it's not you."

"I have … feelings for you — more than friends, type of feelings. I have been ever since we first met. I know this won't change anything, and it's selfish of me to confess before your date with -"

He couldn't finish the sentence as you leaned forward and silenced him with your lips. The first touch was light, barely there. Then, he started to move, pulling you in. The kiss felt soft, but there was a hint of desperation, wanting, and need hiding between each drag of air, each brush of lips. The way he held you close by your waist, the fabric of your blouse bunched up in his hand. You moved together, exploring, searching. Nothing else mattered. Matt was all warmth and heat and comfort. It felt like finding your way home.

With great effort and reluctance, you pulled back, pulling the much-needed air into your lungs. Matt grunted softly in disapproval, following your lips, trying to fill the gap between your mouths. You smiled into him, caressing the side of his face and composed yourself.

"I have feelings for you too, ever since our days at Columbia."

Matt beamed at you, letting out a relieved exhale. The fine crow's feet adorned his eyes; his mouth pulled taut at the ends, and you fell in love. All over again. But this time, your love was no longer unrequited.

[astaroth1357]

Demon Brothers React to MC Getting Kidnapped by Lesser Demons.

Watch out for minor first half spoilers!!

Lucifer

Kicking himself because he has to find out through Mammon that the MC is missing and he didn’t notice their absence himself.

The second the alarm gets raised he gets into a state somewhere between coldly rational and extraordinarily furious. 

Definitely still level-headed enough to rally and organize his brothers for a search party but there's nothing but seething rage just rolling off of him the entire time. Probably-could-have-made-another-Satan type rage.

How well he keeps his composure will be based entirely on how long the MC is MIA. The first hour or so will be mostly put together but past that he'll start to slowly unravel as the panic takes hold.

At one point he even gets snippy with Diavolo over the phone and that's when you KNOW that he's reaching meltdown mode.

If he's the first to find the MC, his #1 priority is to get them away from whatever scum grabbed them and take them to the closest safe place he can find. He'd scoop them up so fast they won't even know where he came from, just whoosh! How'd I get on this roof??

Only once they're out of harm’s way will he circle back and deal with their kidnappers personally. You better be sure any damage done to his human will be reflected a thousandfold back onto their attackers. Probably coming back to the MC with some blood on him and is not going to care.

Relieved to have the MC back but restricts them from going out alone after a certain time now for their own good. If they need something that badly, they can come to him.

Also strings Mammon up by his toes that night for losing them in the first place.

"By the time Cerberus gets to you, I'll be sure you're only my table scraps…"

Mammon

The first to notice that the MC was being oddly quiet (thank their father for his text spamming habit) then found their stuff scattered and abandoned at RAD.

Told Lucifer right away and, oh boy, he is a mess: talking a mile a minute, punctuating his sentences with expletives, on the verge of tears, whole nine yards.

He left his human alone for what?? Like five minutes, if even, to go to the library and get themselves kidnapped?! What kind of guardian is he?!?

Already searching the place top-to-bottom without being told where to go or what to do.

He actually ends up a strange inverse of Lucifer. While Lucifer will start panicking more over time, Mammon will start panicking less as his fear escalates to all out anger. Give it a few hours and he’s not even going to be able to keep his demon form under control anymore.

You know this boy is legging it across the entire Devildom himself waving around some kind of hand-drawn "Have You Seen This Human?" flyer looking for any leads at all.

If he were to find the MC first, his first action would probably be to plant his foot right in the face of whoever took them. Hard. Then repeat until their skull’s a caved-in mess on floor. No mercy this time, just pure protective rage.

Following the fight, you'd think he was just reunited with his lost puppy. Lots of crying, hugging, and blubbering out apologies even when the rest of his brothers show up.

Would pretty much be glued to the MC's hip for at least a week afterward and makes more of a point to hang off of them in public now. They're his human after all, can't have anyone else getting the idea of pulling a stunt like that again.

"MC!! What'd ya go runnin' off for?? We're goin' home after I take out this trash, got it!!"

Leviathan 

Wouldn't really want to believe it at first because it just feels too unreal, like, the same thing happened to Henry in Episode 86 of TSL when he was kidnapped by enemies of the Lord of Fools and it was up to his true friend to track him down…

Suddenly remembers that Henry was also tortured while he was taken and that really sets in the panic.

Unsure of how to help at first because he knows he's just a useless shut-in but Belphie of all people is the one to remind him that he does have one big advantage over his brothers: a fucking navy.

In an act of surprising backbone, he more or less demands a full fleet of ships from Diavolo and (honestly to his shock) he gets exactly that to comb the Devil’s Sea while looking for MC. Lotan even helps out!

If he were to be the first to find the MC (presuming they are indeed on a boat or something cause 🤷‍♀️) those kidnappers really shouldn't have challenged the third strongest brother in his natural element, eh? Those who aren't automatically lashed in the face or flung overboard by his tail get hung by the leg over the edge of the ship for Lotan to pick off one by one.

Sails back to shore with MC booming with pride that he of all people finally got to be their hero! Will literally be so happy if MC ever brings it up again, doesn't matter how much time has passed.

Things would settle back to normal pretty quickly after that, but he now checks up on the MC a lot more often and will even leave his room for them if they need to go somewhere and don't want to go alone. Can't have this turning into a rerun, you know?

"You hurt my only friend… So drown."

Satan

One guess how the Avatar of Wrath took the news. It's not swimmingly.

Unless your definition of "swimmingly" is a murderous rampage of toppling furniture, breaking windows, and swearing to curse right about anything that moves, in which case aptly put. 

He gets stuck in an anger-induced tantrum for a bit before finally getting snapped back into coherent thought by Belphie and putting those mystery novels of his to good use. Smart boi takes second to Lucifer himself in the search, suggesting good locations for his brothers scout based on what clues they have to go on.

Of course, he's not content to just to call orders from the sidelines and is out searching himself like he's on the goddamn warpath. Doors? Who needs doors? If anything the hole I made in your wall is more efficient.

Should he be the first to find the MC he would coolly and methodically subdue any kidnapper he can get his hands on, release his human, and bring them home as soon as possible. They've been through quite enough today and don't need to see anything he's got planned for the bastards later.

But the second that Diavolo puts them in the castle dungeon, you best bet that Henry 1.0 is going to the LEAST of their worries. Who's ever wanted to play a life or death game of hide and seek with a giant snake and the incarnation of Wrath itself? First one caught gets the "quick" death! Any volunteers?

Might give the MC a mild scolding for going out when they shouldn't have but otherwise is just happy to see them back and safe. May act extra soft towards them for a couple days, just until the nerves of the situation finally wear off.

"Don't mistake this for mercy. I assure you, I don't know the meaning of the word."

Asmodeus

Highkey freaking out, like, almost as hysterical as Mammon when he hears the news. 

Being the Avatar of Lust, he of course knows there's a whole lot of creeps out there in the world and he is utterly terrified that his poor MC has fallen victim to one at that moment.

For once, all thoughts of himself and his looks are out the window. What? It's past 2am and MC is still gone? I can stay up another hour! Dry shampoo and a washcloth counts as a shower, right? Who the fuck cares, where's MC?? Somebody find them already!!

Pools his contact list with Satan's and starts reaching out across the whole Devildom asking for people to be on the lookout and offer tips. Also begs Solomon to use his magic to help in the search (which he's more than happy to do anyway because he cares about the MC too)

If he were to find MC first it'd be one of those rare cases where he'd be seen really truly enraged. No cute banter, no playful flirting, just telling those worthless scum-vats exactly where they belong and exactly how he's going to put them there. Is it any surprise that he's also madsick with a whip?

Crazy relieved that MC is free, but now it's on them to help him clean up and get back to his prettiest self. I mean, he worried himself half to death while they were gone! All this dirt and sweat going to take three, no four, bathes to fully clean off!! Best hop to it~♡

"Touch them one more time and I'm going to set fire to whatever landfill trash like you crawls out of!!"

Beelzebub

It can't be happening. It honestly can't be happening. First he loses Lilith and now MC?? He can't lose two. He. Can't. Lose. Two.

Pretty much the mantra going through his head as he tears the Devildom apart with his bare hands. 

It's 1000x worse than how he gets when he's hungry because at least then he might stop when he finally gets fed. Now it's either find MC or wait until he collapses from exhaustion and hope he doesn’t leave the whole realm a smoldering crater before he gets that far.

There's no reasoning with him either, the best the brothers can do is steer him in a direction and let him loose.

If he found MC first he probably wouldn't even realize it for a bit, he'd just keep attacking whatever or whoever is in front of him on his path of blind destruction. It'd take the MC literally flinging themselves at him or throwing their arms around him to snap him out of it but then it's back to sweetheart Beel.

Hugs ensue. Really tight hugs. Probably a few tears and apologies too (even if it’s not really his fault at all). 

Woe to anyone who tries going for the MC once he’s sure he has them because they WILL be broken then eaten. He’ll encourage his human not to look, but some things just have to be done.

Would absolutely carry MC back home and refuse to put them down until the others force him to. The floor may as well be lava planning on taking them away from him too.

Wouldn't care as much about personal vengeance as his brothers as long as MC is safe. He'll trust that his family will more than punish the kidnappers (though chances are he already took a chunk or two out of a few of them during his rampage anyway).

Protective instincts up by 100 after this, though Belphie usually steps in and eases him back a bit when he's about to get suffocating. MC never travels without a buddy now, ever. He just can't risk it.

"MC, I-I'm sorry… I just couldn’t lose you too…"

Belphegor

Keeps the coolest head of all the brothers on the outside, but there's a cold fury building up in those eyes.

Pretty much takes charge of whipping everyone back into gear with a combination stinging remarks and heavy duty guilt tripping. May not be the nicest method, but it's effective. 

"Asmo, grow a freaking spine and do something useful for a change! Mammon, this your fault to start with so you ought to be breaking your ass to find them! Satan, watching you is getting embarrassing, pull yourself together and think like you're good at it!"

His harshest criticisms get saved for Lucifer (big shock) but he only dishes them out when he sees his older brother really losing his grip or teetering on losing hope. If the “mighty firstborn” can’t keep it together then why should they even listen to him in the first place?

When he's not administering "motivation," he's keeping tabs on Beel's progression through the Devildom and trying to minimize the damage there. He's the only one that can get through to him long enough to change his course if necessary.

If he were to find the MC first, well, unlike Satan he doesn't have the forethought to save the torture for later. It's happening right here, right now, and you better bet that being the last born doesn't stop him from being a force to be reckoned with.

Waits with the MC for his brothers to catch up to them and deal with any stragglers. May cuddle with them and look like he's trying to take a nap in the meantime, but in truth he's still very alert, on edge, and ready to absolutely wreck shit if anything gets too close to them.

Though it doesn't look like his lazy ass goes through the same protective streak as his brothers, he's a lot quicker to try and convince the MC to stay home now. No out and about=less chance of getting nabbed. Plus he keeps his favorite pillow, win-win. 😏

"What about your worthless lives makes you think you deserve my mercy??"

[twinklelilstarkey]

Relieved - Matthew Tkachuk

Words: 1.7k+

Type: Fluff

Summary: Matthew has to go back to work just days after you give birth to his son and he absolutely hates it.

Warnings: Female!Reader. Anxiety (maybe, separation anxiety). Kinda rude Matty. Mentions of soreness and lack of sleep (from birth).

It has been 2 days since you were dismissed from the hospital. Two days since you have officially become a mother. And two days since you haven’t slept a full night without waking up at least 4 times during it.

Your body is still very sore, but medicine helps. Yet it’s not like you move a lot around the house.

Matthew, your boyfriend and dad of your kid, does not let you get up most times the baby cries. He always says that he will check and then if you’re needed, he’ll bring the baby to you. All of this because he knows that you’re tired and really doesn’t want you to tire yourself out further or go through any pain from how sore you are, over something that he can do.

Bad thing work calls quick. You’ll be on maternity leave for at least one more month, but Matt? Yeah, no, his team supposedly already needs him back.

And he’s not happy about it.

“Baby, I’ll be fine.” You tell him in a low whisper. “You don’t have to worry that much.”

He clenches his jaw and looks out of the window, clearly annoyed. He’s not wearing a shirt and is holding the newborn baby close to his chest as he sleeps peacefully.

Matt looks down at his son, staring at his small chubby face with adoration, as it is kind of smooshed against his warm skin, which makes his lips slightly parted, and he continues to contemplate calling his coach and just announce his absence last minute.

“He’ll probably still be asleep when you come back.” You tell him, gaining his attention again. “We’ll both be fine.”

“And if something happens?” He asks, also in a whisper, “I won’t be able to pick up the phone and come home.”

“Your mom is just a few blocks away at the hotel, remember?” You ask softly, “I promise that if something happens she’ll be the first person I call.”

He thinks about it for a second and looks down at the baby again.

“She’ll probably get here in less than 2 minutes too.” You add to lighten the mood.

A grin appears over his lips at the sound of your words and he gives his head a slight shake. You smile and he leans away from the wall beside the bedroom window.

Matthew sits down beside you on the side of the bed and you move a bit to sit closer to him. You two look down at the sleeping baby, admiring him as if he’s just the most peaceful thing in the world and didn’t wail his little lungs out just about half an hour ago.

You lean your cheek against Matthew’s naked shoulder and he lays his head against yours, letting the two of you sit in the peaceful silence as he rethinks his options.

“I’ll go.” He finally whispers, “But promise me you’ll call my mom right away. And that you’ll always have your phone with you.”

“I promise.” You say with a slight grin.

You lift your head off his shoulder really slowly, so he can lift his first, and you move a bit on the bed to move in even closer to him. You give a quick kiss on the lips before giving him two more on the cheek and offer him a smile.

“Everything’s going to be fine.” You tell him in a whisper.

(...)

Throughout the warmups and game, Matthew’s mind is going a mile a second. 

Sure, he’s a professional athlete, he’s supposed to be able to put everything in the back of his mind and only focus on the game and nothing else. But it doesn’t really work that way. 

From the time he stepped foot outside of the apartment and inside the arena, he feels like his heart is continuously skipping beats and accelerating for no reason.

And the fact that everyone that would see him walking to or around the locker room would congratulate him for the second time for being a first-time dad, is just making matters worse. 

How is he supposed to be focused on something when everyone just keeps on reminding him who he has at home?

Warm-ups were awful, he just wanted to do one more lap, go take his gear off, and go home. It’s going to take him hours to leave that place and knowing that is just worsening this whole situation.

You, on the other hand, are more than calm. To be completely honest, you’re sitting in bed half-asleep for most of the time. As well as the baby, who is sleeping on his little crib beside your bed, peacefully, as the game plays in a soft mumble on your bedroom’s TV. 

You’ve also now come to realize that the voices of the casters over the sound of blades on the ice are surprisingly relaxing when left at a certain volume. To you, at least, a mother who hasn’t slept more than 3 hours for the past few days.

While you were taking your very peaceful nap, Matthew was still a nervous wreck. He’s made sure that one of his trainers has his phone just in case something happens. Something that, of course, they never do but today is the big exception.

And surprisingly, he scored in the second period. 

Matthew honestly felt like he was on autopilot the whole game, so it even came as a shock to him that he did it. Which some people did notice since he had a more confused look on his face than anything while everyone around him celebrated. 

And right as the game went to intermission, he thought he was being able to put home aside for a second. But that was only until the god damn intermission interview.

“Congratulations on the new addition to the family , by the way. How’s everything going back home?”

Damn you, whoever decided to make that question. He did answer with a smile and a soft tone, seeming to everyone like he’s an under-control-over-his-emotions dad and not at all freaking the fuck out.

You? Still fast asleep. Just like the baby.

By the time the third period reached its half, Matthew was already seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. 

He’s almost home.

And you? Well, this time you’re not asleep anymore. You’re changing a diaper and then comforting your very small baby against your upper chest as you walk around the house.

It still amazes you how such a small being can scream so loud.

You used the opportunity of being up on your feet and with the baby with you to go actually eat something. Which was kind of hard to do with only one hand, but not impossible.

You texted back Chantal, Matt’s mom, just to let her know that you are okay and that you were even able to take a nap, which as an answer you got all types of celebration emojis.

Everything was going pretty okay and honestly, that nap worked wonders with you. You felt exhausted when Matthew left, and now you feel as strong as ever. Still sore, but strong.

After eating and drinking tones of water, you walked back to the bedroom to watch the end of the game. You had to eventually feed the baby as well but that went fairly easy.

You had to give yourself a pat on the back after this whole thing, everything went so well that it seemed like you’re truly getting the hang of it. For now, at least.

The game ended, the Flames won, and Matthew was ready to go home. 

That is until he’s told that he has press to do. He swears he almost hit someone with his stick or even helmet. Like, come on, people!

And this time he did not have the smile nor a soft tone, he looked pissed, which some people found funny. 

At least some questions were quick and easy to answer, but there still were the quite annoying ones he’s grown accustomed to.

He was out of his chair as soon as the words ‘the questions are do-’ left someone's mouth. Rude? Probably, but today is not the day to throw that in his face.

The shower was probably the quickest one he’s ever taken and he thinks he didn’t even dry himself off completely when he started getting dressed. 

Speeding out of the parking lot, home he went.

He doesn’t even think he parked his car correctly, but he was out of the car and inside the house in a matter of seconds.

You heard him from the bedroom let his bag fall by the lobby of the house and his quick footsteps over the wooden floor of the hallway. 

A few seconds later, Matthew appears in the bedroom’s doorway and his eyes are staring down at you right away.

“Hi!” You say with a smile.

“Did he sleep this whole time?” He asks, a slight shock on his face.

“No,” You say with a smile, “But he might go to sleep again in a few.”

You look down at the small baby and you hear Matthew making his way to the bed. He ignores the fact that he’s still wearing his very uncomfortable suit and sits next to you, leaning his back against the headboard while eyeing his son staring at the ceiling while what looks like chewing on his tongue.

“Do you want to hold him?” You ask him as he stares intensely.

A shy smile grows on his face and you smile back as you see that as a big ol’ silent yes. 

You lean away from the bed’s headboard and turn a bit to Matthew to get a better angle. He slowly and safely takes his baby from your arms, who automatically leans on whatever warmth is next to him - that being Matt’s chest.

Matt doesn’t feel stressed, anxious, mad, or even tired anymore. He just feels relieved that he’s back home.

You look at two of them and your heart completely melts at the image you swear you can look at for the rest of your life. 

What is there not to love about this?

Baby fever is still going strong, so I had to write this, don’t hate me.

[oitommothetease]

Invisible String (9/?)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female reader (Modern AU)

Word Count: 2k words

You weren't a morning person, hell, you weren’t even a person in the morning. Therefore, when you woke up to two kids playing with your hair and jumping on your bed, you wanted to strangle them or shove them on the floor. But again, you loved those little demons so you just groaned loudly, clearly irritated and you decided to keep your eyes closed, hoping that your ignorance will make them leave you alone. You squeezed your eyes shut and didn't open them until you heard a familiar voice chuckling.

“Carol told me you aren't a morning person, but this-” James didn't finish his sentence, his lips breaking into a cheeky grin, and as much annoyed as you were at his teasing, you kind of thought he looked gorgeous. Who looked so gorgeous this early in the morning? A smile made its way to your face and you instantly wiped it off, feigning offense.

“Carol? You're already on a first-name basis with my sister?”

“Aw, don't worry, doll. I'm just trying to be friendly with your family or should I say my future family as your mother reminded me ten minutes ago,” he pestered, moving towards you to hand you the cup of coffee in his hand. Bucky winked teasingly when you accepted it, and you mumbled a ‘thank you’.

That pet name made your stomach do some somersaults and you didn't trust yourself enough to speak. It's not like the first time he called you ‘doll’, in fact, he had been calling you that the moment you started fake dating. But it was something about the way he said it as if the word was made for you and nobody could say that word unless it wasn't voiced by him for you. He didn't notice the flush in your eyes and even if he did, he didn't mention it.

“That’s it. You’re done hanging out with my family,” you articulated, “You are officially infected.” 

“Don’t be like that, doll. Come on, breakfast’s ready.”

At the age of 18, when you were finally a college girl, you decided that breakfast was a myth created by Satan. When you lived with your parents, the breakfast consisted of extravagant food like pancakes, waffles and fruits. Once you moved away for college, your breakfast shifted to coffee and maybe a toast if you had the time before your first lecture. And the second you were independent, coffee became your boyfriend, keeping you up at night and also, your best friend, keeping you up in the morning without dozing off in classes.

So, sitting again at a dining table with your family and fake boyfriend/boss was very awkward, to say the least. But of course, your sister had the magical ability where she took an awkward silence and converted it into an uncomfortable conversation.

“We hope we didn't wake you up last night. Nick and I tend to get loud sometimes,” Carol joked and you coughed, choking on your food, and James laughed awkwardly. 

James' hand instinctively came to your back, running calming circles with his palm and you shot a deathly glare to your sister. 

“Oh, we know all about that,” James teased, bringing your chair closer to him. Your eyes widened and you whipped your head towards him so quickly that your neck hurt. What was he saying? This man, your boyfriend, fake boyfriend was a completely different person than your boss (not that you were complaining). He was funny, charming, he made you feel comfortable and something else you weren’t ready to point out just yet.

You could see yourself falling for a man like James. No, he is your boss and sort of criminal. Get your shit together, you told yourself.

After the very awkward breakfast, thanks to Carol. Your mother told you to show James around town and you would have said no but that meant you’d have to stay at home with your family, which was worse. So when James accepted your offer to go to your favorite burger place nearby, you were relieved.

“This burger is amazing, but nothing compared to Barry’s,” James stated. 

You nodded your head, chewing the remnant of food in your mouth properly before speaking, “Nothing compares to Sally and her food.”

You liked being with James, everything about him made you want this, the real thing with him, not the whole faux boyfriend play. You wanted him and you were sure that he didn’t. One look at him was sufficient for anyone to know how handsome he was, and how oblivious he was to the waitress ogling him. He didn’t spare her a glance, he was probably used to the attention that he stopped caring about it. Of course, if you weren't overthinking at the moment, you would have noticed that he didn't care about anyone else - well, except you. 

“The waitress was totally checking you out,” you informed James. You were very jealous, but you wouldn't stop your crush on your boss to stop him from living his life. He had already sacrificed a lot for you, you didn't want to cock-block him on top of that.

“No, she wasn’t,” he huffed, looking at you for any sign that this conversation displeased you the way it did him.

“I swear she was,” you said, “You should ask her out. She’s cute.”

 “No, I’m taken.”

“But you’re not taken, James. This isn’t real,” you retorted and it hurt you so much to say. Sometimes you wished you could be a selfish bitch but you couldn’t do that to James. He deserves someone who would cherish and love him, not give him a faux relationship. “You should ask her out.”

 “Do you want me to?” James asked, his voice was laced with desperation that you couldn't understand. Why would he care about your opinion?

Bucky hoped that you would say no, he needed a sign to know that you wanted him too. His tone was despondent because he was hoping that this could be more. He really wanted it to be. But when you said yes, everything came shattering down for him. You didn’t want him and God, he was so frustrated that he could cry. What sick game was the universe playing with him? He felt like a rat stuck in a cage with cheese right outside, in front of him. Even though he was so close to you, you were still out of his reach.

“You know what?,” he pondered, “Now that I think about it maybe I should ask her out?”

“Like right now?” you questioned, taken aback by his sudden and unexpected change in demeanor.

“Yeah!” he cheered enthusiastically, “No time like the present, right? You can get home by yourself?”

He didn’t wait for your answer, already walking back towards the restaurant, and you murmured a ‘yeah’ which he didn’t even notice because he was already jogging towards the burger place.

When you reached home alone, tears welled up in your eyes, and you ran up to the bathroom to avoid stumbling upon your family. Maybe you shouldn't have pushed him, maybe if you didn’t then he wouldn’t have pursued the waitress. He wouldn’t have gone if you didn’t shove him towards the cute waitress. Why were you such a good person?

Your thoughts were brought to a halt with frantic knocks on the door. Instantly, you wiped your eyes and opened up the door to be met with your sister’s kids. Izzy and Alex didn’t give you any time before getting a hold of your hand and rushing you outside to help them set up the trampoline.

Your family was already out there, and you hoped your face didn’t say, ’I've been crying in the bathroom.’ Your sister and her husband were seated on a blanket which was spread out on the grass, sipping wine, and your parents were admiring their grandchildren.

“Auntie Y/N!” Alex exclaimed and Izzy added, “Help us fix the trampoline please.”

You agreed because those two were the only people in the world that considered you their friend without asking for anything in return. Moreover, it was a good distraction, if you stayed in a room thinking about James, then you would probably lose your sanity. So, once you started setting up the trampoline for the kids, it became somewhat fun, and you almost forgot all about James, and how he must be talking to that girl and how that girl must be flirting with him. You hoped he didn’t call her doll, you knew you were being unreasonable and immature, but you couldn’t help yourself.

Izzy and Alex made their way towards their parents and whispered something about you being so in love with James that his absence made you angry.

You ignored them and the way your sister smiled, you were so focused on fitting the trampoline spring that you did not realize someone was standing behind you until two strong hands came around you, taking the spring from your hand and attaching it to the corner. 

You knew it was James, no one would touch your hand so gently, any other man would have snatched the spring from your hold and mansplained it’s process to you. But James wasn’t doing that, he wanted to be near you, to have your attention fully that is why he took the spring from you. He didn’t undermine you. No, he desired you to notice him, the guy who has been trying all weekend to get you to like him. He wanted you to see Bucky, not your boss, James.

You could feel his head looming over your shoulder, you dared to crane your neck in his direction to find him already looking at you with a smile on his face. You were so dazed in his eyes that you didn’t notice that he was wearing a white shirt instead of the one he wore in the morning. You did not notice that he didn’t leave you to get the waitress’s number, instead he got a customized shirt that read 'I heart Y/N'. You only noticed him.

Furthermore, you didn’t care about anything else at the moment, just him. Bucky eyed your lips longer than he should have and leaned a bit towards you; a question. You answered his question by closing the distance between you and crashing your lips with his. His hands engulfed around your waist, flushing your back against his chest and he kissed you feverishly. 

The kids were right.

You were in love, and that love was reciprocated by the man who was holding you like you were his archer and kissing you like you were the source of his last breath. But both of you were too unaware to realize that the other felt the same way.

Everyone could see that, your mother looked over at your father and your sister looked at her husband, smiling, reminiscing the way they fell in love just like you and Bucky. The kids looked at you both with hope, aspiring to have a love like that in their future, the kind they saw in movies and in the couples around them.

What you didn't realize was that there was one other set of eyes watching you from a car in the distance. Rumlow finally found his rival's vulnerability, and he was going to do everything in his power to exploit and eventually kill Bucky’s weakness, his love, you. 

TAGS:  @bananapipedreams​ @akkinda10​ @rivers-rambles21​ @emmabarnes​ @valsworldofcreativity​ @boofy1998​ @marvel-3407​ @mybuck​ @priii​ @coffeebooksandfandom​ @ladydmalfoy​ @shaking-a-jar-of-bees 

[janshu]

Once In A Millennia...P1.

Summary: A thousand years ago you were married to the Sukuna, a mortal man with the power of a god. Bound to him, his "death" leads you to wander the world alone, against all odds. However...his spirit remains and was resurrected by an unknown boy...

Word Count: 1k-ish.

Warnings: Gn!reader, mentions of a past life & family arranging a marriage.

The days had begun to blur into one incoherent mess.

That wasn't too out of the ordinary. You couldn't be expected to remember every moment of every day, not when you had several lifetime's floating around between your synapses. The mundane and monotonous would naturally be forgotten to make room for the impactful and important memories. The one's you hold onto like your life depends on it and maybe in some way it did, life was mysterious in its ways.

It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that you had seen everything. Every advancement in every field from science to medicine, going from horse-drawn-buggies to vehicles and letters to text messages. Safe to say that nothing was a surprise anymore. What was life's great surprise now? In a thousand years you had seen and experienced everything, from the divine to the depraved.

Life had begun easy. Being only the child of simple country folk who took pride in their work, worshipping the gods in their own special way, you were given more freedom than most in your childhood. Father and Mother had let you wander the secret places of the village until the sun set and dinner was ready, fed and ready for bed you'd lay down on the comfortable cot they had purchased with the earnings from that season's harvest to let you dream the night away. Until he came, that fateful day where your parents made the decision to sacrifice you to the warlord baring down on their home and land. The ultimatum that sealed your fate was simple: you or them and being the pragmatic people they were chose themselves to save.

Now hundreds of years later you weren't sure you should curse or bless them for their decision because that choice set you on the path to where you are now, browsing the morning market like the days of old with the luxuries of the modern age.

That's when you were made aware of it. The creeping cold of being watched, of being found. The inescapable reality of a person exhaling their hot breath against the back of your neck at an angle your neck simply could not turn towards. The feel of a large palm bearing its weight against the curve of your spine with the addition of three more to various hand-holds across the expanse of your body.

"Have you been well, my sweet spouse? The years haven't been kind to you, have they?"

The deep chuckle of a man thoroughly sadistic in the uncaring manner of which they dispatch those he deems maggots, a man changed, a curse upon the world.

Your husband: Sukuna Ryōmen.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten. Wouldn't it be a pity if you've forgotten your husband?"

And when you understandably twist your head around to venture a guess why he of all beings was behind you at a random stall? There was no one. Not the copious amounts of people shopping for their meal ingredients, not even the shopkeepers or the one that was impatiently waiting for you to purchase that fruit and strangely enough: no husband in sight.

An odd hallucination perhaps?

You were being followed, very conspicuously might I add. Clearly they thought themselves to be a master spy by the way they hid behind dumpsters, peeked around poles and made themselves the most obvious person in the ocean of people. Pure lunacy or a power move you weren't sure of yet, the garment they wore a dead giveaway to their intentions. The deep navy uniforms of the Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Technical College. A sorcerer and not a good one if their sneaking skills alluded to their abilities.

Far more inconspicuously you took a look at the figure with the reflection of a shop's window pane. A young man, average, pink undercut and overall nondescript but there was something familiar about his aura. A sinister darkness that was foreign in his kind features. That couldn't be natural. Sepia shaded orbs trained on your figure with a burning intensity that would set your soul on fire with its pinpoint directness. The more important matter was why a sorcerer was following you. To your knowledge they believed Sukuna was a myth and your marriage to him had been forgotten in the past seven hundred years so was it superstition that led him to follow you? Or did you have a curse attached to you and he was doing his job?

Odd, to say the least.

"Excuse me? Uhh, hello? Uhm..'scuse me."

A hand clamped down on your shoulder from the opposite direction you had been watching the sorcerer. Turning back around what did you find? The very same magic user you had been spying. How did he move so quickly? That was a split moment and he was behind you. How did he manage that?

"Yes?" You responded, face rather devoid of emotions while taking a closer inspection at the sorcerer. Upon closer look he was indeed a boy, in the middle of his teen years at the most yet experience had aged his soul considerably. The windows of his eyes closer to that of a wizened old monk rather than a bright-eyed pubescent teenager. The oddest feature that stood out were the dark tattoo's across the bottom edges of his eye sockets, rather distinguished against the otherwise blank face. Fashion statements got stranger and stranger with each passing century.

The boy appeared to have a goal in mind as his eyes searched your face, your eyes and the windows to your soul. Whatever he was looking for either wasn't there or he kept the discovery to himself because after his hand was removed he sheepishly scratched the back of his neck. "Oops, sorry! Thought you were someone else."

"No harm done, honest mistake."

Without another word the sorcerer boy turned on his heel and retreated in the direction he came from. How he had managed to double back and come from your blind spot was still a mystery, there must've been more than meets the eye on that boy.

Yuji Itadori returned to the First Year dorm hall and slid the door closed behind him as he entered. It was late, much later than when he was expected to be in bed and resting. If anyone had noticed his absence then he'd be in a world of pain. What could be worse than the punishment's Gojo could think up? Well, there was one thing. That tattooed psychopath using his body as a vessel. Whoever that person was had set him off. The control he originally thought he had on the cursed spirit had hung by a thread, a battle on who got to control his body raging on. It was a stalemate, mostly. He had control over the vast majority of his facilities but that uppy bastard had gotten his hand in the metaphorical doorway and pried himself into the driver's sleg. Taking over his legs and waltzing up to them and without a plan. They were lucky he had regained himself right as he touched them, what would've happened if he hadn't? There were moments he went on and on about slaughtering women and children like maggots but was the sight of them enough to cause a sudden bloody rampage? Apparently so.

The transition to phase into the mindscape that kept Sukuna contained was seamless. As if he had walked to another section of a home, could be considered as easy as breathing but whenever he was there it was not because he went willingly. He was summoned.

On the pinnacle of the mountain of bones, perched upon on the throne, Yuji noticed there was a crazed grin on the very man's face. Revealing the pearly whites amidst his bloody gums, eyes wide as he leaned forward. Not looking at his host, quite the opposite but something beyond him. Shoulders cloaked in a white robe rose and fell in time with his maniacal giggles, gleeful and relieved. It would be perturbing if he wasn't used to the grating sound by now. The reason why he was laughing was the disconcerting subject.

"Ahh, there you are, dearest spouse. How long will it take until you return to me?"

[whatiswhump]

Oh I wonder what Del’s sister would think if she visited again and saw how much Alfie has deteriorated 🥺 what would her reaction be?

@cursedscribbles @voidwhump @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @aliceinwhumperland @whump-it @professional-idiocy @ziptiewhump @angrystudentgoopfire @jaxonjekkels @clubbem @simplygrimly @whole-and-apart-and-between @one-stop-whump-shop @bumpthumpwhump @rosesareviolentlyread @whumpasaurus101 @hurting-fictional-people @burtlederp @thelittlegirlwithcurlyhair

-

She had lied to her parents, again.

She lied to them a lot these days, each time it got a little easier. A little bit less of a twist in her stomach, less of a shake in her hands.

She had always been held to a high standard, she was the darling girl, the larkspur, the dear. She kept her parents contented and happy, even after… Del’s absence.

She studied hard, enjoyed the little things put in front of her like her mother’s interest in her embroidery and needlework. She didn’t mind doing things for others, she liked to do so. To put a little extra gusto into a hobby just like any other of hers to make her mother smile brighter was a very small sacrifice.

… but now everything was so… tangled.

Each day what had all been so routine and simple in her life was becoming increasingly more difficult but she seemed to be the only one noticing.

So she lied.

-

“The doctor would like to speak to you first, Ms. Sullivan, please take a seat and he will be with you shortly.”

Three buses and a mile walk. She could wait a few more minutes.

Georgie nodded and retreated back to an institutional chair on the wall opposite of the visitors’ entry. The nurse had looked surprised when she requested Alfred’s name. She had picked up a phone, with an uncertain expression and spoke in a hushed tone to the other end. Georgie only straightened her dress and tried to stand up taller. They wouldn’t send her away would they? She had come so far.

She was relieved when only a few minutes later the doctor from last time opened the door with a smile.

“Ms. Sullivan, I’m so delighted to see you again.”

She did her best to smile in return and then followed his welcoming gesture through the door.

“It’s nice to see you as well-”

He must’ve seen her trepidation when it came to his name, “Dr. Harris,” he supplied with a reassuring smile. He lightly rested a hand on her shoulder to guide the teenager forward into the maze, only removing it to unlock the necessary doors.

“So, back to see Mr. Finch? He’s a lucky boy to receive another visit from you.”

“Um, yes, I’m on my summer break now.” She offered as a means of explanation for her presence.

She felt the doctor looking at her even as she kept her gaze forward as they walked side by side, “Do your parents know you’re here?”

Her heart jumped, would he still send her away? Or much worse, insist on calling them?

“Oh yes, of course, they wanted to come themselves but they were already otherwise occupied. Father is at work and you know how bridge club can be.”

The doctor didn’t respond right away as he opened another door off the hall for her and she fought the urge to look at him, something about eye contact with him made her feel as though she were under a magnifying glass. She was hoping for a laugh at the bridge comment, no such luck. It was a distinctive difference from the fatherly warmth she remembered from the last time she had met the man.

“Have you been studying hard all year?”

Georgie had to pull her dreading gaze away from the sterile halls they were passing to look back to the doctor just as soon as she’d repressed the urge, “Um yes, I received straight A’s.”

“Clever girl. You will have a bright future ahead of you then. I very much believe in young women having the opportunity to apply themselves academically and in the workforce. We’ve even had a few young women beginning to graduate in psychiatric medicine coming to the hospital.”

The doctor stopped at a door and unlocked it for her to enter.

“I’d like to go to college when I graduate after next year, but my parents are not so sure about it yet…”

“Well with your grades I’m sure you can convince them,” He placed his hand on her back again and led her to a chair to sit and then took the opposing chair at the table.

She nodded but waited for him to speak again, it was hard as it was to hold her thoughts as she was imagining Alfie in these halls, alone day in and day out.

“Ms. Sullivan, I can tell you are a bit nervous but I’d like to talk to you about Mr. Finch before your visit today.”

She swallowed subconsciously and nodded to the doctor earnestly.

“As you know, Mr. Finch is very unwell. I suggest you prepare yourself as he’s declined significantly since your last visit. His inability to cooperate has required more rigorous treatment and as a result he may not be able to communicate as you might be used to -He isn’t even talking right now actually. I considered not allowing you to see him as this institution is no place for a young lady like you to begin with… but thought better as I can only hope that seeing you might help. I realized that you might be calming for him, after all we want to do everything we can to help. I am willing to try all routes.”

Struggling? More so than before?

“I’m afraid you will have to brace yourself, can you do that for me, Ms. Sullivan?”

Georgie forced herself to fold her hands politely in her lap and make eye contact as she nodded in understanding. He was scaring her but any hesitation and he might not let her see him.

Something about him today made her feel as though he wouldn’t think twice about exercising his control. She recognised it from her school principal, her 2 week long boyfriend had called that one sadistic.

Georgie looked past the doctor at herself in the mirrored wall she faced. Her cheeks were flushed like they always did when she was nervous. She self consciously tucked the stray pieces of hair behind her ears just as the door buzzed and then clicked open and a man in white entered. He nodded to Dr. Harris and then stepped aside for a much smaller frame to come in.

Alfie was as pale as a ghost, dressed in a straight jacket and eyes trained down. An additional man in white was guiding him in by the shoulders, practically pushing him forward as he shuffled in.

“Alfred, you have a visitor!” The doctor announced jovially.

Alfie’s eyes darted up to him and stayed for a moment, as if actively trying to comprehend what the doctor had just said.

At last he blinked and turned his head to check the rest of the room. After an excruciating few moments he landed on Georgie and as she smiled, she realized she had been holding her breath.

“Hi Alfie,” Georgie whispered.

She looked back to Harris who had stood for the orderly to press her friend down in his place. The orderly stepped back and it was Harris’ turn to place his hands on the slumped shoulders.

“Alfred, I allowed Ms. Sullivan to come in case she might help you to improve your behavior. Ms. Sullivan, I will be in just the other room in case you need any kind of assistance.”

He stared at her a moment while the guards and doctor left and closed the door. The doctor had said he wouldn’t talk, she reminded herself.

But then after an excruciatingly long silence, he whispered back, “Hi-”, his voice sounded wrong and rough.

In horror, she noted that his eyes looked empty too, he recognized her right?

“It’s been a long time since I visited you last, I’m sorry,” her stomach was twisting. What had they done to him? He looked so- so- very wrong, emaciated, exhausted and just... so very empty. 

Tears started to well in her eyes as he didn’t respond again immediately, angrily she wiped them away with her hand, she shouldn’t be crying. She was stronger than that. She didn’t cry. Not anymore.

He frowned deeply, reflecting her expression.

“Where is Del?”

Where is Del.

More tears threatened in her eyes. The doctor had warned her- she had told him she could handle this.

Each silence dragged on as she tried to hold herself together and Alfie was just trying to comprehend.

“Fie…” She breathed, “It’s just me… Del isn’t- he isn’t coming.”

He looked down again, eyebrows creased but silent.

With harsh movements, she wiped her face again, she had to pull herself together. Or they would-

The door clicked and they both flinched, though Alfie mostly just hunched a little more into himself. 

“Ms. Sullivan, I think it would be best if you followed me out.” The doctor had returned, along with another young man in a coat and the two same orderlies. 

She looked wide eyed between Alfie locked in on himself and the men. It was clear she had messed it up. She had only been with him at most 3 minutes.

She stood and Alfie looked back to her and tried to stand too, but the orderlies were already above him, holding his shoulders to keep him seated.

“Come along now, Georgina,” Dr. Harris beckoned her again uncharacteristically with her first name and Alfie made a noise. He looked upset.

It looked like he wanted to stand again but the men’s grips were strong.

The doctor’s eyes had become hard, she was hesitating too long, so she looked back to Alfie one more time before following him out.

-

“I’m sorry I let you do that- see him- I mean, that was too upsetting for you,” The doctor said once they were in the hall. But his eyes had softened and he did look sorry.

She choked back a sob, “What happened to him?”

“It’s his disease, his hallucinations are worsening.”

Another infuriating sob escaped her. How had this happened? How had she lost them both?

Next thing she knew she was hugging the doctor, crying into his jacket.

“Shhhh- shhhh, you’re okay, I know, that was very hard to see- shhhhhh, you were a very brave girl to want to help him,” He stroked her head a few times.

At last she pulled away and he held out a handkerchief. She accepted it and mumbled that she better be going, incredibly embarrassed by the intense show of emotion.

He walked her out and suddenly she was in the parking lot, her lip still trembling stupidly now that she was alone. 

That wasn’t even him, kept going over in her head.

Before she knew it, fresh tears were spilling over her cheeks. 

“Um, ma’am? Are you alright?”

She whipped her head up, mortified yet again. 

In front of her was a young man of about 30 something with a very concerned look on his face.

She used the doctor’s handkerchief to wipe away the fresh tears, “Yes, I’m okay,” she meant to say in an assured tone but in said it came out shaky, like she was 10 again.

“Pardon my intrusion, but I’m not sure if I believe you,” a small worried smile bloomed on his face and he reached out his hand, “My name’s Sean, I’m an orderly here.”

She laughed slightly in spite of herself, he was right she wasn’t really selling herself on this one. She shook his hand, “Oh god, I’m sorry, that’s probably covered in snot,” she retracted it quickly.

“Ma’am, that isn’t even the worst I’ve seen today,” he cracked a smile and she blew her nose again in her best attempt to regain control.

“I feel like such an idiot... the doctor, he warned me what he would be like but I was so stupid, I thought I’d be fine,” Her voice cracked again. 

Sean took a step back from the hand shake, careful not to invade her space.

“Your response is nothing to be embarrassed about.”

She felt her cheeks burn in shame as she sniffled again, why was she talking to this man in the middle of the parking lot while bawling her eyes out? It was bad enough in front of the doctor. She was already certain they wouldn’t let her see him again, not after all of that. Now this was probably just making it worse, the guy worked here after all.

“If I may ask, who’d you visit?” He asked so gently, it almost looked like he wanted to hug her right there.

She hesitated but then realized it didn’t matter if she told him, he could just go look at the logs she was sure.

“Alfred. Alfred Finch.”

The man’s eyes grew serious and then quietly, very quietly he said, “You’re the girl from the painting.”

The girl from the painting. God, Alfie had been painting? And she was in one?

It felt like a knife right through her.

“This is going to sound incredibly peculiar… but Alfie- he’s um my patient- but more- he’s my friend.”

His friend? 

Georgie didn’t know much about mental hospitals but she didn’t think orderlies were friends with patients.

He read the look on her face and pressed forward, “I know it doesn’t make sense.. But, Fie, I mean Alfie, he’s a really good kid and- well I don’t know, I feel crazy just trying to explain it to you-”

“-He painted something with me in it?”

She looked like she was going to break out in tears again.

“Yeah, a few months ago, it was amazing, there was this one with you and a young man, in a park or a field or something, surrounded by little yellow flowers…”

She looked down, “They had taken me to a picnic in the country, the three of us... I remember that day. It was buttercups.”

Sean watched her somewhat nervously as she stayed lost in thought for a few more seconds but then she looked back up, “So you know Alfie? Actually know him?”

Sean nodded but frowned, “I haven’t seen him in months, the doc thought we were too close, he wouldn’t communicate with anyone else… so now I just hear bits and pieces.”

“What- what have they been doing to him? Today, he-” She fell off, unable to finish the sentence she had started.

“It hasn’t been easy for him, they were giving him electroshock for a while but I have no idea what they’re doing right now, sounds like a lot of different things.”

She stared back at him with horror and Sean could only grimace, that nagging guilt suddenly twisted like a knife into his stomach. It was now his turn.

“You really love him don’t you?” He finally said at last. 

She nodded, solemn, “He didn’t kill Delano…. And he’s the only brother I have left.”

Back-breaking clarity weighed down on Sean in that moment, he knew without an ounce of doubt that she had spoken the truth. Alfred did not kill Delano.

Now Sean felt like the stupid one for ever questioning himself.

“I don’t think he did either.”

The girl stared at him, hard and solid, “You believe him?”

She had to ask, she needed to hear it again, it was too much to believe. She had been the only one for so long.

“I mean I didn’t ever think he could do it. But I think I’ve really known he didn’t do it for a long time now.”

Suddenly for the second time that day she found herself inexplicably and uncharacteristically hugging someone, but this time as she buried her face into the practical stranger’s chest, she sank with relief. He believed them. He Believed Them.

After Georgie remembered herself and how ridiculous she was being she pulled away. But Sean didn’t look embarrassed, instead his face was only a reflection of her own, sheer relief.

“He doesn’t deserve to be in there. I think it might kill him.” Sean said at last. The second sentence was like an admission to himself, something he hadn’t dared allow himself to think.

She nodded, “But how can he ever get out?”

They shared another tired look, neither of them were idiots. What they wanted was impossible.

After neither of them said what they knew, Sean inhaled and looked around, “Did you take the bus here? Can I give you a ride home? I just got off my shift.”

“Um, you know what, sure, thank you... But you can drop me off at a park closeby, I can’t go home like this,” She pointed to her tear stained face and gave a half hearted smirk, “My parents don’t know I visited him.”

Sean thought for a moment, “If you’re hungry, my wife-” It thrilled him even to say the word, two months fresh, “- is cooking dinner… I can’t promise that it’ll be edible but the company’s good. She’d love to meet you. She never stops hearing about Fie.” Sean raised his hands slightly in a ‘what can I say?’ gesture and smiled sheepishly.

“Okay, thanks, I’d like that.”

[nerdzzone]

The Aftermath

Summary: Dealing with the fall out of their first night together isn’t easy for Whitney Taylor or Chris Evans, but given the complicated results of their frivolous activities, it isn’t something they can avoid forever.

Chris Evans x OFC

Part One: Luckless Romance

Note: I was originally going to leave Luckless Romance as a one shot, but I had some requests for a part two. I had it all planned out in my head anyway so I figured I’d write it up to explain more of where our two lovely character’s heads were at!

Please let me know your thoughts! Or if there’s any other parts of their story that you’d like to hear about!

_____

When Chris woke up, the first thing he noticed was the throbbing in his head.

The second thing he noticed was the warm body curled into his side.

His initial reaction to that sensation was confusion, but as the events of the night before quickly came back to him, he was filled with an unignorable sense of dread.

He'd fucked up.

He'd spent a year burying his feelings for her to protect their friendship and all it took was a few drinks and flirtatious remarks for him to risk it all. He cared for her, there was no doubt about that, but he knew she didn't feel the same way. Clearly, she was at least attracted to him, but he'd hazard a guess that her loneliness was the driving factor in why she'd chosen to indulge in the activities they'd partaken in a few hours earlier. She’d had no luck in the dating scene, so she'd settled for him and now, when she woke up, she'd break his heart.

She didn't want him.

She didn't want the life that he could offer.

She'd made it clear that she found the world of Hollywood exhausting when she'd talked about her discontent with living in L.A. and that was a world he couldn't escape from. Plus, his fans had given her a hard enough time when she was just a close friend. If she was to become something more, they would tear her apart. He didn't want that for her and he knew that she didn't want that kind of hassle in her life either.

But he couldn't stand to hear her say it. He never did well with rejection and rejection from this woman - who he knew was absolutely perfect for him - was more than he could handle.

So, after carefully extracting himself from her grasp without waking her, he left.

He felt sleezy and awful not even saying goodbye, but he needed to quiet the noise in his brain before he could face her and he figured she would probably appreciate his absence. He knew firsthand how awkward it was to let down a one night stand the morning after so, really, he was sparing her just as much as he was protecting himself.

The heat outside was stifling already and made Chris realize just how desperate he was for something to quench his thirst. They'd drunk more than he normally did and he was feeling the effects. Perhaps that was why his mind was so fuzzy and unable to process what had happened, but he figured it was a safe bet that he could pin that on his anxiety.

And there were only two people who had much luck soothing him when his mind started racing: his mother and his brother.

He knew his mother would be disappointed in him if he told her what happened. He'd poured his heart out to her several times about the confliction he felt with his feelings for Whitney, he dreaded to think what she would say about him finally doing something about those feelings in such a reckless way and he was definitely too hungover to deal with her reaction to how he'd handled things that morning.

So, that left Scott.

Pulling out his phone, he glanced at the time and cringed. It wasn't even six thirty yet and with it being a Sunday there was a good chance that Scott was in a worse post-inebriated state than he was, but he took a chance and hit 'call'.

It took a few rings, but eventually Scott answered, his voice still groggy from sleep.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Scott," Chris greeted him as he crossed the street. He needed to flag down a cab to get home, but figured the quiet park across from Whitney's apartment was a better place for this conversation. No extra ears listening in. "I fucked up."

"Chris, it's not even seven o'clock in the morning. How badly could you have fucked anything up this early?"

He sounded tired and Chris felt bad, but he needed someone to talk to.

"I slept with Whitney."

There was a moment of silence before Scott let out a cheer.

"Finally!" He practically squealed, but then he paused as he took in what Chris had said. "Wait, how did you fuck up? Did you not use your best moves?"

"What? No, nothing like that," Chris' brow furrowed in annoyance. "I fucked up by sleeping with her at all. She's one of my best friends, Scott, and now that's ruined. It’ll never be the same, if she even wants anything to do with me now."

"Did she not seem happy about it? What did she say when you left?"

"Nothing," Chris admitted. "I left this morning before she woke up."

There was a moment of silence as Scott processed his brother's words.

"Okay, I'm starting to see where you fucked up. You shouldn't have done that."

"No, I fucked up by sleeping with her!"

Chris' tone was snappy and uncalled for, but his headache was getting worse by the minute and he was feeling exasperated enough without Scott's judgment.

"Alright, alright, calm down," Scott sighed. "If you want my honest opinion, I think you're overreacting. You two have always had a 'will they won't they' vibe about you. She's clearly just as interested in you as you are in her."

"Why 'clearly'?" Chris questioned. "She's never acted like she sees me as more than a friend."

"Uh, yes, she has. She blushes and giggles like a schoolgirl every time you compliment her, she practically drools at the sight of you and listens with hearts in her eyes whenever you talk. She's got it just as bad as you do."

"Don't do that," Chris groaned. "Don't put ideas in my head that aren't true."

"It is true. I wouldn't lie to you about that," Scott insisted. "I think this is just your anxiety talking. Go back to her place before she wakes up, hear what she has to say and go from there. She might surprise you."

"I'll think about it," Chris lied, knowing already that he couldn't face going back. "Thanks for answering. I'll let you get back to bed."

"Don't mention it," Scott assured him. "I know you're stressed now, but I'm happy for you. It's about time the two of you came to your senses."

Chris smiled despite his disbelief in what Scott had said. He laughed it off and said his goodbyes before walking towards the nearest road to catch a cab.

He saw Whitney's message a few hours later, but he ignored it. He needed to get his head straight and steel himself for however she chose to let him down before he would be ready to talk to her.

It took days for him to get to the point of acceptance, but she never messaged him again. So, working on the assumption that she was relieved by his silence or didn't care enough to demand any explanations, he got on a plane and headed back to Massachusetts with plans to spend the next few months drowning his sorrows and pushing her from his mind.

-

Three Weeks Later

My period was late.

For the last ten years of my life, my period had arrived with impressive reliability and now, a few weeks after having unprotected sex, my period was late.

It didn't take a genius to figure out what was going on. There was no doubt in my mind that I was pregnant.

"It's not that easy to get pregnant," Hannah insisted as we sat in my living room, counting down the minutes until the pregnancy test would be ready. "A lot of people who actually want to get pregnant have to try for months before it happens. It seems super unlikely that you'd get pregnant from a random one night stand."

"Yeah, but it does happen to plenty of women," I pointed out. "And knowing my luck, I would get knocked up by a man who then flees the state without another word."

Hannah winced as I paced in front of her.

"Still haven't heard anything, then?"

"Nope, nothing," I sighed. "I haven't reached out again, but he made himself pretty clear by leaving before I woke up and then ignoring my text."

"I just don't get it. He was so obviously into you. I would have bet money that you two would live happily ever after."

"You did bet money," I reminded her. "I'm still waiting for that thousand dollars you promised me."

"You didn't accept!" She smiled. "I owe you nothing!"

While I didn't really expect her to pay me, I was going to argue the point, but the timer we'd set for the test went off and snapped our focus back to the task at hand.

"Oh god," I groaned. "You read it. I can't deal with this."

Hannah nodded and carefully picked up the little stick before looking up at me with a grin.

"It's negative!"

I felt a wave of relief, but it was quickly replaced with doubt. I felt like I was pregnant. My period was late for the first time in years, I'd had sex without a condom and I was nauseous and my boobs hurt. It seemed too good to be true that it was all some kind of coincidence.

"What? Are you sure?"

"Yeah!" Hannah smiled. "There's two lines!"

Her words hit me like a truck as my stomach dropped.

"Hannah, two lines means positive."

"No, it doesn't," she insisted, reaching for the box. The fall of the smile on her face told me all I needed to know before she even spoke again. "Shit. Sorry, babe. You're pregnant."

I let out a groan as I flopped onto the couch next to her.

"This is a nightmare."

"Shall I get my shotgun?"

I raised an eyebrow at my friend.

"What?"

"For a shotgun wedding?"

I laughed at that suggestion, but shook my head.

"No, I don't want him to be forced into anything."

"Well, what are you going to do?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "It doesn't really seem real yet."

"Are you going to tell him?"

I looked down at my still flat stomach and nodded my head.

"Yeah, I'll have to. I know it's still new, but I want to keep it so he'll have to know," I sighed. "If he even answers my calls."

"He will," she assured me. "Or we'll fly out to Boston and you can tell him after I kick his ass."

The image that statement conjured in my mind pulled another laugh from my lips as I felt an overwhelming wave of appreciation for my friend. I knew that no matter what, she was in my corner and that was a comforting thought even in the midst of all the uncertainty that was swirling around me.

"Thanks, Hannah," I smiled. "I really appreciate all your support."

"Of course," she reached out to squeeze my shoulder. "Are you going to call him now?"

"No, I think I'll do it later," I informed her. "I want to wrap my head around it a little bit first."

"That's probably sensible," she agreed as a grin slid onto her face. "Wow, you're gonna have a baby, Whit. I know it's scary, but that's really cool."

"Cool isn't the word that I'd use. Try absolutely terrifying."

My earlier smile was still on my face despite my bleak words as I thought about what she'd said. It was somewhat good news. Definitely worrying, especially given my situation with Chris, but I'd always wanted to have kids so it would have been a lie for me to say that I wasn't at least a little bit intrigued by the idea.

-

When Hannah left my house, about an hour after we read the test, I planned on taking some time to fully comprehend the news before I shared it with Chris. However, almost as soon as I closed the door behind my friend, I remembered the time difference. Chris was three hours ahead of me which meant that even though it was only five o'clock for me, it was already eight o'clock where he was.

I felt the anxiety bubbling in my stomach as soon as I came to that realization because I knew that if I wanted to call him that day, I had to do it right away and if I didn’t call him soon, I was worried I’d lose the nerve.

I took a deep breath and went straight for my phone, dialing his number before I could change my mind, but I was crushed when he didn't answer. I waited a few minutes and then tried again, but still, there was no answer and I let out a growl of frustration as I frantically typed out a text.

Hey. Call me as soon as you can. It's important.

I paced around my apartment, the reality of the situation starting to creep in now that he, once again, seemed to be rejecting me. 

I didn't want to tell him news like this over the phone, but I'd seen the paparazzi pictures of him arriving at the airport in Boston so I knew that I had no other choice. However, if he wasn't even going to answer my calls, I'd have to get the news to him another way. My mind immediately started racing with all the possible ways I might have to break the news to him as the panic of potentially having to do this alone started to rise.

But luckily, all those concerns were irrelevant when my phone lit up with Chris' name on the screen.

"Hey," I answered quickly before he had the chance to change his mind and hang up. "Thanks for calling."

There was a moment of silence before he replied.

"Sure," he kept his tone cool and steady, but there was an underlying tension. "What's up?"

The sound of his voice brought tears to my eyes. This was it. This was the make or break moment and I felt my palms start to sweat as it hit me just how devastated I'd be if it didn't go well.

"I, uh, I don’t really want to tell you this over the phone, but I guess I don’t really have much choice," I started. "I got some news today that you have a right to know."

It seemed obvious to me what I would be hinting at considering our current situation and the silence that followed my words led me to believe that he had a pretty good idea what I was going to say. When he stayed quiet, wordlessly waiting for me to continue, I took a deep breath and dove in.

“I’m pregnant.”

I hadn't thought much about how I was going to tell him, but I figured there was probably a better way than blurting it out that bluntly. I cringed slightly at my harsh delivery as his silence was almost immediately broken and he started spluttering and stuttering, stumbling over his words until he managed to blurt out one clear sentence.

"Is it mine?"

A burst of anger flashed through me at such a suggestion.

"Yes! Oh my God, Chris, of course it's yours!" I insisted. "How many people do you think I've slept with in the last month?"

Maybe he thinks you're a slut, the voice in my head taunted me. Maybe that's why he left without a word.

That thought was enough to get the tears flowing and, when Chris didn’t answer my question, I let out a sob. I covered my mouth to hopefully stifle the sound, but I knew he heard it loud and clear.

"Shit, Whitney," he sighed. "That was a dumb thing to say. You just caught me off guard."

"Well, how do you think I feel?" I hissed. "I'm scared, Chris. What are we going to do?"

This time there was no hesitation before he answered.

"I'll get the first flight out tomorrow morning," he informed me. "We can talk about it then."

"Okay," I sniffled. "I'm sorry."

"No need to be sorry," he assured me. "It's just as much my fault as it is yours."

My emotions were overwhelming me by that point and I stayed quiet, knowing I'd fall apart if I opened my mouth to speak, but Chris didn't let the silence last too long this time.

"Are you, uh, are you gonna keep it?" He asked, sounding heartbreakingly similar to a small child asking his parents if he could keep the stray dog he'd brought home. "It's your call, but I'm behind you one hundred percent."

"I am going to keep it," I told him quietly. "But you only have to be as involved as you want to be."

"I want to be very involved," Chris answered quickly before letting out a sharp laugh. "Fuck, I'm gonna be a dad."

The sound of more laughter floated through the phone after that realization, but I couldn't tell if it was giddy or hysterical.

"You are," I agreed, feeling some relief from his reaction despite how complicated I knew things would be. "But we can talk about it all when you're here. If you really don't mind coming back."

"Not at all, this is important." He assured me. "I'll be there as soon as I can. I'll text you with the details as soon as I know."

"Okay, thank you."

He insisted that I didn't need to thank him before we quickly wrapped up the conversation.

There was a lot to say and a lot to discuss, but it wasn’t something to be talked about it over the phone. We needed to discuss it in person once we'd both had time to understand exactly what it meant.

And we needed to figure out what the hell we were going to do about us.

-

I thought having almost twenty-four hours to compose my thoughts would make things easier, but as I waited for Chris to get to my apartment I still had a lot of questions and concerns

But I had decided one thing for certain: we were better off as friends.

When we were friends, he didn't ignore my calls. When we were friends, he didn't run out of my apartment without saying goodbye. When we were friends, he hadn't broken my heart because I never gave him the chance. I was frustrated by his behaviour since the night we spent together and it made me angry. When I thought about it too hard, it made my blood boil and I wanted to tear a strip off of him for making me feel so used. When we were friends, I'd never felt more than a hint of annoyance towards him.

So, the only solution as far as I could see, was for us to stay just friends.

That would prevent any more heightened emotions and if we didn't do it that way, I would end up resentful and bitter. I didn't have much experience with children, but even I knew that those feelings would create a very toxic relationship for raising a child.

Which is why, as soon as he stepped into my apartment, I was on the defensive.

"I think we both know that we're better off as friends," I blurted out before the door was even shut behind him. "What happened was a mistake and now we just have to find a way to work together as friends."

Chris looked surprised, which I found surprising, but he recovered quickly and nodded his head. I'd be lying if I said that wasn't bittersweet. I didn't have the energy to argue with him, but part of me was definitely hoping that he'd put up a bit more of a fight.

"Yeah, I think you're right," he agreed after a moment of thought before changing the subject. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," I shrugged. "A bit nauseous and very emotional, but nothing I can't handle so far."

"Good, that's good," Chris smiled. "Have you been to a doctor yet?"

"No, not yet. I have an appointment tomorrow."

"Can I-" Chris paused to clear his throat, looking nervous. "Can I come?"

I felt my heart flutter at the thought of him caring enough to want to come to a doctor's appointment, but I shut those feelings down as fast as they popped up. He cared for the baby, not for me.

"Sure," I nodded. "But it won't be very interesting. I think it's mostly just checking all my basic information so they can keep track and probably some blood tests and vitamin recommendations."

"Doesn't matter," Chris insisted. "I want to be there for it all. We're in this together."

Those words brought more tears to my eyes, but I blinked them back and looked away. In a move that I wasn’t expecting, Chris noticed immediately and took the few steps needed to put him right in front of me.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

His hands settled on my arms and the way he rubbed them would have been soothing if it didn't break my heart. How could this supportive, comforting man in front of me right now be the same man who slept with me and then never called me?

"I'm just overwhelmed," I choked out. "We really fucked up, Chris. How could we be so stupid?"

"I don't know," Chris sighed. "It was a dumb mistake, but we can make the most of it. We can do this."

"I know, I know," I took a deep, shaky breath to try and pull myself together. "It's just a lot to take in and I don't think it's really hit me yet."

"It is a lot," he agreed. "Here, let's go sit down."

I let him lead me over to the couch and then flopped down on it. He sat next to me, but we stayed quiet, neither of us really knowing what to say. After a few moments of tense silence, Chris finally spoke.

"I know this might be asking a lot," he started, the hesitation in his voice making me nervous. "But would you consider moving to Massachusetts?"

It wasn't an unexpected request. I knew Chris was happier there and considered it his home and I had told him how tired I was getting of living in Los Angeles. It was probably the better place for raising a child as well. I'd heard plenty of stories about Chris' childhood and it was pretty idyllic - full of experiences that children growing up in a big city like L.A. didn't often get.

However, it meant that I would have to leave my entire support system behind. All my friends and my family would be here and I would be completely alone except for Chris - who I wasn't even in a relationship with - and a child - who was hardly going to be able to provide much emotional support.

It seemed like the best option for everyone involved except for me and I wasn't sure that was a sacrifice that I was selfless enough to make.

I realized how long his words had been hanging in the air between us as I got lost in my thoughts and my head fell into my hands with a groan.

"I don't think I'm cut out for this," I whined, tears filling my eyes again as I felt a strange mix of emotions There was plenty of regret and with that came guilt because this poor child deserved a mother that didn't dread it's existence. "I'm not mom material, Chris. I don't have the instincts."

"It's all still fresh," he reminded me. "The instinct isn't instant. But I didn't mean to upset you, if you don't want to move to Massachusetts then we'll figure it out."

"No, no, it makes the most sense," I sniffled, lifting my head to look back up at Chris. "It's just scary. I don't want to leave my family and friends and I'll have to move soon if I'm going to so I can find a doctor, it's a lot to think about right now."

"It is, but I can ask Carly about a doctor. My family will support you one hundred percent."

I forced a weak smile, but I felt more nerves bubbling in my stomach.

"Have you told them?" I asked. "Does your mom hate me? I hope she doesn't think I'm trying to take advantage of you."

"No way!" Chris insisted with a chuckle. "She gave me a very stern lecture about being responsible, but I've talked about you enough for her to know you're not some crazed fan looking for a payout."

"That's good." I breathed out a sigh of relief. I knew he was incredibly close with his mother and I didn't want her to think badly of me. "I haven't told anyone yet, except Hannah."

"Downey's gonna kill me, isn't he?"

He shot me a sheepish look as he spoke, but I shook my head.

"Nah, I think he'll be thrilled. He loves babies and he's been teasing me about us getting together since the night we met," I informed him, watching his face for a reaction to that statement. There wasn't any. "He'll probably have a bet to cash in on as soon as I tell him the news."

"Well, that's reassuring," Chris smiled. "I think we'll have enough people who'll be mad at us..."

He was clearly referring to his fans and I cringed.

"What are you going to do about that?"

He shrugged.

"What do you want me to do?"

I took a moment to think before I answered him.

"I don't want you to publicly deny that the baby is yours," I warned him, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to bear hearing that even if I knew that he really had no doubts. "But I don't care if you don't make a big announcement. We can just let people draw their own conclusions."

"Making a statement might be better. It would stop the rumours from getting out of hand. There'd be an uproar, but it would eventually die down," he pointed out. "I'll talk to my team and let you know, but you should probably make all your social media private whatever we decide."

I didn't use social media much and I definitely never posted pictures of Chris, but even so I'd felt the wrath of his fans more than once after we were spotted out together so I knew how they could be.

I nodded in response to his instructions and another silence settled between us.

My mind was racing with questions that I wanted to ask. I wanted to know why he'd left, why he hadn't called, why he'd even slept with me if he really didn't see me that way. Part of me even wanted to cry and plead with him to give me a chance, to let me show him that I was good enough to be more than a friend, but I knew I couldn't handle the rejection. Whatever his explanation would be, it wouldn't change the situation and with everything else we had to deal with, I didn't have the strength for more heartbreak too.

-

When Chris left almost an hour later, we had a firm plan in place.

I would try to get out of my lease - or Chris would pay whatever fee I was charged for breaking my contract - and I would move to Massachusetts by the end of the summer to stay with him. I'd argued that point at first, but his reasoning made sense. He would be in and out once they started filming the last two Avengers movies so I would have the place to myself a lot, but when he was home he'd be able to help with the baby. After the first year, when the newborn phase was done, I would get my own place and we'd work out an official custody agreement.

He promised to come to as many doctor's appointments as he could and offered to pay for absolutely everything that I needed. I assured him that wouldn't be necessary, but I appreciated that he was already committed. Many men probably would have run for the hills in our situation or, at the very least, demanded a paternity test before they made any promises, but Chris was enthusiastic and supportive and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Well, I wanted to ask for something more. I wanted us to be together - I wanted us to be making plans to be a family, not to be co-parents - but I knew that wasn't what he wanted and I was determined to accept that. I needed to focus on counting my blessings and being grateful for what I did get out of our relationship instead of focusing on what was missing and unobtainable.

Even if it broke my heart and hurt me more than the loss of any other romantic relationship I'd ever had, I was going to make the most of it for the sake of our child. It didn't ask to be born into such a messy situation and it's safety and security were quickly becoming the most important things in my life despite the fact that it was hardly more than a bundle of cells at that point.

And as that thought hit me, I realized that maybe I wasn't as lacking when it came to maternal instincts as I had thought.

-

@maggotzombie @moonlacebeam @mizzzpink @zaylaugh @flowery-mess @flowerjewels @njrronaldo7 @hockeychick10 @partypoison00 @theladybiers @sidepieces @firoozehmoon @patzammit @sparkledfirecracker

[whumpmatsus]

Hi! 👋 Two things! First, a fic request (again Ichimatsu whump because I'm sorry but I have to): Ichimatsu takes a hit meant for one of his brothers (be it accidental or on purpose) and is pretty badly injured. Cue the rest of the Matsu Bros. to the rescue!

And second, um...would you be okay with it if, let's just say hypothetically, I made fan art of some of these fics? 😺

FIRST OF ALL thank you for this because it's LITERALLY the longest thing I've written on this blog so far!! so I hope u enjoy it fully uwu

Matsu Bros plus a cameo by Mama Matsu!! <3

second... YESSSS THAT IS ALWAYS DEFINITELY OKAY!!! aaaaaaa you flatter me <3 <3 <3

-

When Ichimatsu first wakes up in the hospital, he doesn’t remember why he’s here. Hell, he barely even remembers who he is.

All he really knows initially is that he’s in a lot of pain. It hurts to breathe, his face is kind of numb in spots, and his leg feels weirdly positioned, plus heavy and uncomfortable. His shoulder feels kind of sore… as does his wrist.

There’s also some strange fog drifting around his mind that’s making it difficult to really focus on anything.

He feels a hand in his own. Not very tight… he thinks it’s someone giving just enough pressure to let him know they’re here. That he’s not alone. That’s comforting, he thinks.

Then he starts to remember things.

He was out walking with some of the others; Karamatsu and maybe Totty? What they were doing is a little fuzzy and isn’t coming to him instantly. He just recalls they were together, walking on the sidewalk. They came to a crosswalk and waited their turn. Karamatsu, as the eldest out of the three, stepped forward first to cross.

Ichimatsu thinks Karamatsu’s intention was that he would hold Totty’s hand to keep the youngest safe while they crossed, and Ichimatsu could follow after them. He doesn’t believe Totty had any objections.

They waited. They followed all the rules they were supposed to. The crosswalk light told them they were allowed to go.

It was someone else who broke the rules, tearing through a stop sign, the car headed right for his brothers. He… thinks he remembers Totty had only just come forward to grab Karamatsu’s hand, so he wasn’t quite there yet. Karamatsu was the one in the most danger.

He doesn’t remember much else. Running forward, pushing his baby brother behind him and yelling for his big brother to move.Then an impact. A lot of pain. Black and nothingness and warmth.

Now he’s awake. Putting the pieces together, he’s pretty sure he shoved Karamatsu forward and ended up getting hit by that car.

He thinks, in his haze, that the car should have hit Karamatsu, because he was the one who went first, because things happened so fast. But he’s glad it didn’t happen that way.

A couple groans catch the attention of whoever’s in the room, and he gets a squeeze to the hand. “Ichimatsu? Honey? Are you awake?”

“Mmh…” It hurts a little to move his head. He does it anyway, getting a glimpse of his mother. “… Mom…?”

It looks like she’s smiling… relieved, maybe. “Yes! Yes, my sweet boy, Mama is here.” She reaches her free hand over to gently stroke his hair. It feels nice. “Thank goodness. How do you feel?”

He closes his eyes. “I hurt.”

“Well, I should hope so! I’d be worried if you weren’t in a lot of pain right now. Do you remember what happened?”

Although he tries to move around, it’s difficult simply because it’s so painful. “Uh, yeah, kind of… I got… hit by a car, right? ― H… hey… Karamatsu and Totty… where are they? Are they okay?”

“Yes, dear, they’re both fine. Karamatsu has a couple of scrapes, but nothing serious. You, on the other hand, are lucky, young man. You’ve got a broken leg, a couple of broken ribs, and a broken wrist. You did have a dislocated shoulder, but they got that back into place. The doctor said it could have been much worse. She said you got off easy compared to some people who get hit by a car.”

She combs his bangs back in a way that mitigates any anger or frustration in her next words. “What were you thinking?”

“The car was coming for Karamatsu…” He frowns as the memory surfaces again, in slightly better detail. Damn. “… And Totty didn’t see it… he was gonna step out, too…”

Everything seemed to happen so fast. How the hell did he manage to get his older brother out of the way and keep his younger brother out of the way when everything happened so fast?

Matsuyo sighs and continues stroking his hair. “Oh, I know… they were both in tears when we all arrived. Totty was inconsolable… saying that Karamatsu would be dead if you hadn’t run forward and that he thought you were dead because you weren’t responding. I should be mad that you scared your brothers… but…”

She leans forward to kiss his forehead. “… You did a brave thing, Ichimatsu. Mama is very proud of you. I just don’t like any of you boys hurt… if you’re inclined to do this again, pull the other person back instead of taking their place. You silly boy,” she adds with an affectionate smile.

“Hah…” he laughs weakly, wincing at the pain in his chest. “Sorry, Mom. Everything hurts… I wanna go home.”

“Mhm, they’ll probably let you go pretty soon now that you’re awake. That’s the main thing they were waiting for, I think.” She moves her hand down to pat lightly at his forearm.

“Don’t worry. You’ll be home before you know it, and your family will take good care of you.”

-

Coming home is kind of weird.

Ichimatsu can’t really walk on his own. Since his leg is broken, the doctor gave him a crutch that he can use with his good hand, but it’s an awkward movement and leaves him feeling unbalanced. It’s just easier to lean on one of his brothers to walk ― in this case, Choromatsu has volunteered to help if Ichimatsu needs to walk somewhere. Though… he gets the feeling that the others would be more than happy to volunteer if the third eldest were somehow busy when he needs to get up.

Every motion, from sitting up to reaching for things to just breathing, is painful thanks to the broken ribs. There’s nothing that can really be done for those, so he’s evidently got to just suffer. He remembers the doctor saying they should feel quite a bit better in a couple of weeks. Most of this is going to take a month or more to fully heal, which is… according to Osomatsu, a ‘major boner-killer’.

Sitting around doing nothing but being in pain is going to be the end of Ichimatsu. He’s sure of that. He can’t go outside to feed the cats, and it’s difficult to cuddle with them inside with all his injuries. That alone is pretty depressing.

The pain medication they sent him home with is also a little frustrating. The first time he takes it, it makes him so tired he sleeps right through dinner.

He falls asleep on the couch in the spare room, he knows, because it’s where he has to be set up for now. There’s noway he can sleep in the futon with everyone else while he tries to heal; that runs the risk of running into someone, or having one of his brothers accidentally run into him.

His leg’s in a cast and his wrist is in a splint, to protect them as they fix themselves, but if those areas have someone roll onto them, it’ll probably result in more damage. Which means more pain and more time added to his recovery.

It’s apparently a bad idea to sleep on the couch. When he wakes up, everything is sore and screaming in pain. Justified, unfortunately, since he fell asleep in the same position he was relaxing in.

Someone else… is here? There’s something warm pressed up against his side.

He glances over to find that he’s evidently been resting on Karamatsu’s shoulder, likely for a while given that Karamatsu’s eyes are closed too. It looks dark out, and Ichimatsu’s foggy mind busies itself wondering what time it is.

There’s a soft chuckle beside him, and looking over reveals one of his big brother’s eyes is cracked open now. It’s swiftly followed by the other one, then the sudden absence of a pressure around his shoulder makes him aware that Karamatsu had an arm around him. “Awake, hm?”

“Yeah…” He tries to stretch, stopped short when a jolting pain in his chest reminds him that it’s definitely a bad idea. “Oww. I don’t even remember falling asleep.”

“That’s alright. You started to get a bit drowsy about half an hour after Osomatsu-nii-san gave you your medicine. We saved you a plate from dinner, though, if you want me to go warm it up.”

Ichimatsu blinks. “I slept through dinner?? Shit. How late is it right now?”

His brother shifts a bit more to take out his phone. “Hm… a bit after midnight.”

“Midnight?” Well, fuck. Although he can justify an hour nap or so, he’s just slept like six hours. He missed dinner, he missed going to the bathhouse, he missed maybe a game of cards before bed.

Karamatsu laughs again, his hand tousling Ichimatsu’s hair fondly. “That’s right, my brother. Don’t worry. Osomatsu-nii-san said fatigue is a side effect of your medicine, and your body needs sleep right now, anyway. So, are you hungry? Mommy made soba and yakitori for dinner, but if you’d rather have something else, just say the word. Your wish is my command!”

Honestly… he’s not really that hungry. He knows he should probably eat; his stomach is just trying to tell him not to have anything heavy. Another side effect of the medication, maybe. “Are you… sure? I kind of just feel like plain miso and rice. Other stuff doesn’t sound good.”

“Of course! I’d be delighted to go heat some up. You simply rest and I’ll…” When he goes to stand up, something catches Ichimatsu’s eye, and he grabs his brother’s hand, weakly, with his own injured one. It’s painful, but…

Karamatsu’s eyes focus on his younger brother, brows furrowing. “Ichimatsu? What’s the matter?”

It’s… that cut on Karamatsu’s face. Ichimatsu didn’t notice it before. Now that he’s a bit more alert, it’s practically all he can see. It’s not very big, maybe the length of one of their little fingers, and not deep. It looks like a scrape from falling off one’s bike or something. He thinks maybe it had a bandage on it at one point. The color has faded into something dull; the skin around is still bright pink, though, suggesting that it’s irritated despite not being cut.

His gaze shifts down to find similar wounds on Karamatsu’s hands. On the palms, where he probably got a sort of road rash when he tried to catch himself after Ichimatsu pushed him out of the way.

His own wrist protests with a violent throb as he reaches to let his fingers graze lightly over Karamatsu’s wrist. Image after image of what might have happened to him if Ichimatsu wasn’t fast enough comes unbidden into his head. Karamatsu could be the one with a broken leg or broken ribs, or it could have been worse.

“Y… you’re okay… right?” As soon as those words are out of his mouth, tears start spilling. All at once he’s pulled into a hug, loose fists resting against his back. He can’t stop himself from leaning in, pressing his face against Karamatsu’s shoulder.

He can feel the soft rumble of mirthless laughter his big brother gives. “You’re the one who was hurt, Ichimatsu. I’m only okay because of you. If you hadn’t seen… I wasn’t paying attention…”

The words, “It should have been me”, hang heavily in the air even though Karamatsu doesn’t say them.

He brushes a delicate kiss over the side of his little brother’s forehead. “Heh… you would have been a better big brother than me. You kept us all safe when I failed. You probably saved my life, you know. Thank you.”

Ichimatsu isn’t sure why it’s now that the full weight of everything has hit him. Now, when he’s home and out of danger, when everything is okay. Shouldn’t he have been falling apart when he first woke up in the hospital? It shouldn’t have taken seeing Karamatsu’s small injuries to remind him that they all could have died when he’s the one in a cast.

It’s hard to keep himself together, to keep his breathing normal so he doesn’t completely go to pieces. (Though, if he did, what better place to do so than in his older brother’s arms?) “… You’d do the same for me, right? So it’s only fair.”

“I would,” Karamatsu hums. “Without a second thought. You’re my little brother and I love you very much and if I could save you from being hurt, I would. I’m… sorry I was so careless that I couldn’t do it this time.”

Ichimatsu grunts, slipping his good arm around Karamatsu’s waist in an effort to be closer. “Don’t feel too bad. The next car’ll be yours.”

-

After eating as much as he feels like he can, Ichimatsu allows Karamatsu to help transfer him to the floor. It’s already set up with a spare futon, a blanket, and a pillow, probably because someone guessed that sleeping on the sofa wouldn’t be comfortable.

He’s still in so much pain. The shoulder that was reduced back into place aches like an old war wound, and his chest is sore even when he’s lying still. To say nothing of his wrist and his leg. His whole body feels like one giant bruise, except worse.

Although Karamatsu insists he’d be just fine to stand guard all night, after a few minutes Choromatsu comes in and sends him back to the bedroom. Ichimatsu doesn’t hear too much of the conversation ― mostly whispers that Karamatsu needs to go get some sleep, that Choromatsu is glad to take a turn.

Soon enough, though, Karamatsu relents and comes to tell Ichimatsu goodnight before he leaves the room. Ichimatsu gets one more kiss on the head and a reassuring squeeze to his good hand and exchanges another round of “I love you”s with his brother, then heads into the bedroom.

Choromatsu came prepared, setting his own pillow up on the couch and tossing a blanket at the end just in case he needs it. “So… how are you feeling, Ichimatsu?”

“Mm… like crap, kinda.” He looks over to where his brother is trying to get settled in. “I can’t believe I slept six hours and I’m still tired. What kind of shit did they put me on?”

“Hah… y-yeah, it’s the good stuff, probably. Is it at least helping the pain a little?”

“A little. Like Mom said before we left the hospital, I… guess it’d be more worrying if I wasn’t in pain right now. I did get hit by a car.”

Choromatsu leans forward and places a cautious hand on his little brother’s head. Once that earns him no punishment, he gingerly combs through Ichimatsu’s hair. It certainly feels relaxing. “You sure did. I… I can’t believe you kept both Karamatsu and Totty safe. Adrenaline’s a… a weird thing, huh? I’m glad you’re all okay. Hopefully the pain medicine will work better once you’ve had a few doses.”

“Mh. I hope so.”

“Yeah. For now, just, uh… just try to get some more sleep, okay? Your body needs a lot of rest while you’re healing.”

Yep, that’s what Karamatsu said, too. Two of his brothers saying the same thing can’t be wrong. … Well, they could be, but it would be weird. “I’ll try. Thanks for… being here. I dunno that I’d really want to sleep alone for the whole night. Guess Totty’s rubbing off on me.”

A low chuckle leaves Choromatsu as Ichimatsu closes his eyes. The sound of rustling suggests that his older brother has laid down and pulled a blanket over himself as well.

After a moment of quiet between them, Ichimatsu becomes keenly aware of a sensation that definitely isn’t going to allow him to sleep. “Uuuugh. Shit.”

“Huh?” Choromatsu is sitting up in an instant, ready to practically spring out of his skin. “What’s wrong, Ichimatsu?”

“― My leg itches.”

“O-oh. So… scratch it??”

He throws his head back in frustration. “No, the one with the Goddamn cast on it.”

“Ohhh. Okay, uh, well…” Choromatsu gets up and rummages through one of the drawers for a few seconds.

After that, a pencil is pressed into Ichimatsu’s good hand with a smile. “Here, try this. Stick the eraser end down in the little space between your leg and the cast, then keep moving it. If the itch is high enough up, it should help.”

Ichimatsu raises an eyebrow at the advice. Well. What’s he got to lose, after all? He spends a moment trying to get the itch scratched after slipping the pencil down, and finally he sighs in relief. “Fuck, that’s a lot better. How’d you know that was gonna work?”

Choromatsu grins self-consciously, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Ah, well… remember when I broke my arm? When I went for my checkup, I had this itch inside the cast that was driving me nuts. So the nurse showed me this trick. It doesn’t always work, but…”

“Huh… well… thanks.” After everything, he’s just really tired and ready to sleep now. He would cross his fingers that nothing else disturbs him if he felt like moving at all.

“Heh, no problem. All good now?”

“I think so.” When he sees his brother straighten up to head back to the couch, his brain evidently thinks it’s good to say something. “H… hey. Choromatsu?”

Choromatsu looks back down, concern etched on his features. “Ah, yeah? What’s up?”

His heart is hammering so fast it feels like it’s trying to break more of his ribs. He doesn’t really want to embarrass himself. It’s just… he feels… “Can you… can you… stay for a minute? Down here?”

“Oh… yeah, sure. I can’t stay too long… I-I can’t sleep next to you. I might accidentally hurt you.” Even so, he lowers himself back down, sitting cross-legged and reaching to stroke Ichimatsu’s hair.

He nods. That’s part of the problem. Even though he normally wouldn’t have much complaint about being left to his own devices… he’s used to sleeping next to his brothers. Right on the end beside Karamatsu. When he’s not feeling well, being absent from them is apparently not doing him any favors. “I know. It’s just…”

His eyes drift closed once more. It must be the medicine making him feel out of it and way too honest. “… I think I’m gonna get lonely sleeping like this.”

“O-oh… gosh.” He can practically hear the frown in Choromatsu’s voice. The other man’s hand combs through his hair, a rhythmic and repetitive motion that makes him sleepy again. “I can probably… sleep like this, propped up against the couch. Is that okay?”

“Mmmh… I don’t want you to have to do that… you’ll make your back sore.”

He chuckles. “Ah, I-I think I can handle it. Even if that’s true, it’d be worth it to me so you don’t have to feel lonely. It’s the least I can do for my little brother.”

“I can’t stop you,” Ichimatsu mumbles. Sleep is scrabbling its tiny, strong fingers at him, trying to pull him down. It’s getting hard to resist. “If you want…”

“Yeah… yeah, I wanna do this for you.” Choromatsu leans down to press a small kiss to the top of Ichimatsu’s head. “Hey. Love you, Ichimacchan. Try to get some rest, okay?”

He doesn’t have to tell Ichimatsu twice. Within a minute of Choromatsu’s urging, he’s fallen back into a peaceful darkness.

-

When Ichimatsu wakes up the next morning, Choromatsu’s presence has been replaced by Jyushimatsu’s.

As much as he loves his immediate older brother, he doesn’t have any complaints. He and Jyushimatsu are very close, and his younger brother being here is pretty soothing to wake up to.

He’s uncharacteristically quiet, though that’s not to say he isn’t his usual energetic self. He appears to be flipping through baseball cards, maybe organizing them in his little album, humming to himself. There’s also one hand free to play with Ichimatsu’s hair, which he supposes is why he still feels relaxed.

“Hey, Jyushi.” His body reminds him why stretching is a bad idea right now, so he settles for arching his back a little in an effort to make something pop. Everything is sore. Even that little bit of movement hurts his ribs enough that he has trouble catching his breath for a minute. “Fuck… morning.”

“Oh! Yeah, it is morning!” Jyushimatsu is chipper as always, though when he leans in for a hug, he’s surprisingly gentle. “How’d you sleep, Ichimatsu-nii-san?”

“Okay, I guess. I still hurt a bunch.”

“Yeahhhh, you were crying in your sleep! But it’s okay! Because guess what? Jyushi is here!” He grins, nuzzling his cheek against Ichimatsu’s. It’s a bit weird, but par for the course as far as Jyushimatsu is concerned. Besides, the hug is nice after the fear of being lonely last night. “Did you have nightmares, huh?”

Now that he mentions it… yep. Ichimatsu’s dreams, or what he remembers of them, were filled with horrible things. The memory of being hit by the car, or the images of either Karamatsu or Totty being hit because he wasn’t fast enough.

He recalls one piece of a dream which involved looking into his own chest and seeing the end of a fractured rib shatter his glass heart.

A shudder runs through his body, prompting Jyushimatsu to tighten his grip just slightly. “Oh, you’re cold! It’s past breakfast, ‘cause you slept for a really long time, but I’ll go get you some tea!! Sound good?”

Given that his appetite hasn’t come back from war, that sounds better than anything else. Though he did manage to choke down that rice and miso last night, he’s not sure if he wants to eat even anything bland. “Yeah, sounds good. Put just a little bit of agave syrup in it for me?”

“Yeah! Anything for Ichimatsu-nii-san! Be right back, okay?”

With Jyushimatsu, ‘be right back’ is typically how it goes. He’s only gone for a few minutes, or at least it only seems like a few minutes.

Regardless, Ichimatsu has a cup of tea in his hand relatively quickly. Almost as if his brother predicted that it would be difficult to hold something very hot with only one hand, the tea is warm, not boiling hot.

It’s easier to balance it with one hand, plus this means it’s pretty much the perfect temperature to drink. As he starts to sip it, he feels Jyushimatsu’s hand, covered entirely by his sleeve, rubbing affectionately between his shoulder blades. “It’s good, huh?”

He swallows and gives the other a nod. “Yeah, pretty good. Thanks.” Thankfully, it should wake him up, too. He’s still feeling kind of groggy.

“Good!! Osomatsu-nii-san said he’s gonna give you your medicine in a minute, since I told him you were up and hurting.” Jyushimatsu shoves his binder of cards away, shifting up to sit on the sofa. “Do you want me to move you up here after you’re done drinking?”

“Probably, yeah. You got anything you wanna do today?” Another sip, and he sighs in relief feeling the warmth flow through him. Damn.He can’t believe he could take something as simple as a cup of tea in the morning for granted. “I can’t really help with baseball practice… but we could watch TV together or something.”

“Sure! We can watch whatever you want!” After only a few seconds, Jyushimatsu wiggles himself back down and leans against his big brother’s shoulder. “Hey, Ichimatsu-nii-san… I’m really glad you’re okay. Even though you’re hurt and everything, you’re home with us instead of… being not home with us!”

The least he can do is let his head rest gently against Jyushimatsu’s. “Yeah… I’m glad I’m home, too. Don’t think I’d rather be anywhere else.”

Jyushimatsu nods eagerly, making a brief, dull wave of pain wash through Ichimatsu. However, he’d rather have that pain than not have his little brother close. “We’ll take really good care of you! Just say if you need anything, okay? I’m really strong and I can get anything! … And if I can’t, Osomatsu-nii-san probably can!”

“Heh.” Ichimatsu takes another gulp of his tea. “You guys are the best.”

-

True to Jyushimatsu’s word, Osomatsu is in pretty soon to give Ichimatsu the painkillers. For whatever reason, even when he can’t be trusted with literally anything else, the eldest is pretty good at monitoring medicine when one of the others needs it.

All things being equal, Ichimatsu has a lot of faith in taking medicine when Osomatsu keeps track of it. He knows how much was dispensed, how many Ichimatsu is supposed to take and how often, how many are left, and all the related things. He’s like some kind of idiot savant who was put on Earth to be a pill counter.

After he takes it, he expects to start getting tired again, so he silently begs Osomatsu to stay on the couch with him. They’re all supposed to be hanging out anyway, based on what Jyushimatsu said, so right now he decides he wants to be close to his oldest brother for a little bit.

Osomatsu seems all too happy to oblige, snuggling Ichimatsu as close as he dares to. It’s probably not a good idea to use normal force, so the touches are… lighter than usual. It’s not so bad.

He settles in on Osomatsu’s shoulder, trying to get his eyes to focus on the show Jyushimatsu turned it to for him. It’s kind of unfortunate that he’s almost certainly going to fall asleep on it. “You guys are taking really good care of me,” he sighs, letting his eyes slip closed. “You want my allowance? Or, like�� a bag of sardines?”

Osomatsu snorts. “What? You’re nuts, man. We’re taking care of you because we want to and because you need it. I mean, if I was sitting here with a broken leg, a broken wrist, broken ribs, and had to have my shoulder cherry popped back into place, wouldn’t you all be like, ‘Wow, maybe we should give the poor bastard a hand’? We’re just doing the same thing for you that we’d do for any one of us.”

Ichimatsu huffs. “Yeah, well… you’re all doing a lot. Karamatsu went in the kitchen past midnight to make me miso and rice, Choromatsu probably fucked up his back sleeping against the couch so I wouldn’t be lonely, Jyushi’s waiting on me, and you’ve got my medicine on a damn schedule or something.”

“Yeah, well,” Osomatsu grins, “I can’t leave it up to you, crackhead.”

He can’t help but chuckle at that. Even so, it’s not going to make him totally drop this. “I’m serious. You guys are…”

Osomatsu nudges him carefully. “We’re being brothers, you boner. I know we suck at showing it sometimes, but… you know we all love each other, right? I guess it’s easier to show it when one of us is sick or hurt. Just so happens you’re the hurt one right now. And also your ass is on painkillers, so everything seems weird to you.”

… Okay, so maybe he can’t fault that logic. Still, though.

They’re both quiet for a long moment while they watch the screen, then Osomatsu lets out a soft hum. “You did good, you know. I don’t like that you tried to get yourself killed, but you did good.”

“I wasn’t trying to get myself killed,” Ichimatsu retorts with the nastiest facial expression he can muster right now. “I didn’t wanna get hit, either. But Karamatsu and Totty weren’t paying attention… I didn’t want them to get hit. I was trying to get us all out of that way… I just wasn’t fast enough.”

Osomatsu scoffs before reaching his hand up to ruffle Ichimatsu’s hair. He appears to be getting a lot of pets like that lately, not that he’s complaining. It feels really good and is one of the biggest comforts he has right now. “You protected them, anyway. I can’t say too much, because you didn’t do anything I wouldn’t have done if it were me.”

Ichimatsu offers a low, mocking wail. “Oh, shit. I’m turning into you. I think I’d rather be a cat. If I were a really bratty cat, you’d still be nice enough to feed me sardines and scratch behind my ears, right?”

“Uhhhh, I guess. You’re changing the subject, you dick.” A small puff of laughter makes his bangs move. “I just… wanna say I really respect you, man. Sometimes I remember the days when you would kick Karamatsu in the leg just for breathing the wrong way. And when you used to blow Totty off to hang with your friends in high school.”

He gets a shrug in response. “People change. We’ve all changed a lot.”

“Yeah, sure. I know.” His arm shifts down and he squeezes Ichimatsu’s good hand in that reassuring, proud way only an older sibling can. “They haven’t all been good changes. But seeing you trying to keep the others safe… that’s a a good change. Just gotta give you your props, Ichimacchan.”

He’s too tired to really argue with Osomatsu. Despite the fact that he knows he’s the shittiest of them all, he has to at least silently acknowledge that what he did prevented one of his older brothers and his baby brother from being in the same pain he’s in right now.

Instead of saying anything meaningful, he just presses himself in more against Osomatsu and mutters, “That’s nice. I’m tired.”

Osomatsu snorts and Ichimatsu feels a light kiss on top of his head. “Alright, dumbass, get some sleep. The pills are probably kicking in. Let me know if you need anything.”

Ichimatsu thinks that, right now, all he needs is his big brother to be the perfect pillow, and he’s doing a pretty good job of that.

-

Although it’s not dark at all the next time Ichimatsu wakes up, it’s significantly later than he meant to sleep. 3 P.M., meaning that once again he’s slept through a meal ― lunch, this time.

Just like last night, he finds that he’s not really all that hungry. Even so, it might be a good idea to eat, so probably he ask Osomatsu to get him something small.

When he shifts and looks over, though, Osomatsu isn’t there anymore. Instead, there’s Totty…

… Oh.

He’s holding onto Ichimatsu pretty tight. Ichimatsu isn’t sure he can move too much with the way Totty is holding him.

“Hey,” he says softly. “Totty? Everything okay?”

His little brother stiffens, wide eyes suddenly turning up to look at him. Unlike what he noticed about Karamatsu, Totty doesn’t have any physical injuries, but… the skin around his eyes is red and puffy. “Y… yeah, it’s all good. Sorry, am I hurting you?”

“No… not really hurting.” He doesn’t remember having seen Totty too much after everything happened. He visited Ichimatsu in the hospital, all teary-eyed and not talking, before they were all allowed to take him home. Once he got home, though, he can’t recall Totty being around a lot even though everyone else was.

He assumed Totty was freaked out after everything and avoiding him just because he’s emotional right now. Seems Ichimatsu was right about that.

He maneuvers his good arm to put it around Totty’s shoulders, pulling him in closer. “Have you been crying? You sure you’re okay?”

Totty sniffles and dips his head down. “Yeah, sorry… I just…”

“Don’t be sorry, dumbass.” Even though it hurts a little to move so much, Ichimatsu cuddles his brother in against him. “It’s fine, you big crybaby. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.”

“I should be the one making sure you’re okay.” Regardless, Totty nestles in, tucking his head under Ichimatsu’s chin. It’s a bit of a weight on his hurt ribs, but it’s not that bad. “… H-hey. I, um. You know. I… I love you.”

Huh. It’s been a while since Totty has said that point-blank to any of his brothers, Ichimatsu thinks. It’s kind of nice to hear. He closes his eyes and offers an appreciative hum. “I love you, too. That it?”

Totty lets out a frustrated sigh, and Ichimatsu can just imagine the pout he has on his face. Kinda cute. He can’t really help himself; the youngest is always gonna be the baby, always gonna be adorable, even when he’s acting like a little bitch or if he wants to deny it. “I wanted to… say I’m sorry.”

“For…?”

“For… everything! Y-you know, for almost getting hit and… I mean, you got hurt trying to protect me and Karamatsu! If I hadn’t tried to follow him without even looking… you wouldn’t have had to worry about me. And… and I haven’t been with you too much since you got home…”

He nuzzles his head against Ichimatsu’s collarbone, kneading his hand against the top of his brother’s good leg. “I’m sorry about that. It’s just… I’ve been… really upset. It was scary, seeing the car hit you…”

The hum Ichimatsu gives this time is lower, pensive and understanding. “Yeah. Mom said you were crying a lot when she got to the hospital. ‘S okay to be kinda freaked out, you know.”

“Yeah, I know… and I was… am.I was scared the whole time… Karamatsu tried to wake you up, but you were just lying there and you wouldn’t…” Totty sniffles and his hand curls into a weak fist against Ichimatsu’s knee. “I didn’t wanna lose you, Ichimatsu-nii-san, and I was really afraid you were gone. I’m happy you’re okay… I just… I-I was pretty sure I was gonna cry the first time I tried to take care of you, so I… wanted to be alone with you. Crying in front of all you guys is…”

Ichimatsu nods to quiet his brother, ghosting a kiss over the top of Totty’s head. “I get it. It’s okay, Totty. C’mere, okay… you don’t have to be sorry for being freaked out and not wanting to cry and all that shit. I’m sure Karamatsu’s freaked out, too. And everyone else. Don’t apologize for your feelings, stupid.”

An indignant huff is the response he gets, before Totty presses in against Ichimatsu’s uninjured shoulder. “It just makes me think a lot,” he finally confesses.

Ichimatsu smirks. “Right. And you’re so out of practice with thinking, it’s hard. I know.”

“Th-that’s not it, you jerk!” Totty whines and brings his arms in, curled against his chest. His knees come up onto the couch, folded under him, as he tries to get comfortable. “It makes me think… anything could happen, at any moment, and that… might be it.And I know we’re all shitty to each other a lot of the time, but… but I love all of you.”

He sniffles, snuggling against Ichimatsu when his big brother pulls him even closer. “The thought that one of us might… die… I-I didn’t… I didn’t know how afraid I was of that… till I thought it happened. If one of us wasn’t here… it… it wouldn’t be the same anymore.”

“… Yeah.” Ichimatsu gives Totty a squeeze that’s maybe a little tighter than necessary. It’s not like he can pretend that Totty is wrong. He’s right. Even though they’re all assholes and treat each other like crap sometimes, the last thing any of them want is for their family to be… incomplete.

They sit quietly for what feels like a long time, holding each other. Breathing. Just existing in sync, in perfect understanding for a while.

Sometimes, it’s true, Ichimatsu is kind of a death seeker. Sometimes he really does want to die. Sometimes he doesn’t care about anything, and just wants it all to end so he doesn’t have to deal with the weight of life anymore.

Sometimes, though… sometimes he fights death with all he has. He thinks maybe that’s what happened after he got hit by the car.

It would have been easy to die then. To just let his injuries swallow him up and put out his life like blowing out a candle.

He’s in a lot of pain right now, but he’s not dead. There must be a reason, right?

He thinks this is the reason.

Holding his youngest brother and realizing how broken his absence would leave his family, thinking about how broken it would be if anyof them were gone, how much they love each other…

… For once, he’s happy to be alive.

[travellingarmy]

║Kaeya║A Cold War

Gender-neutral.

Word count: 3k

---

You two had been at it for quite some time now. The war between you and the Cavalry Captain, Kaeya, didn't look like it was going to end any time soon. "Honestly, this has gone for far too long that it's silly at this point," Lisa sighs, watching the two of you from afar. "When are they going to make up?" Jean, who stood beside the librarian, nodded in agreement.

You and Kaeya had crossed paths in front of the fountain in the centre of the city one fateful morning. Snarling and angry at the sight of the male, you turned around with a huff and walked away. Although he was your captain, you two clearly showed a much stronger relationship than commander and knight; you two were friends until the fight two weeks ago.

Kaeya sighs at your retreating figure and walked over to the two, tall females who he had noticed was watching. "Good morning," he greets, a hand raised and a smile on his face. "Kaeya, when are you two going to talk?" Lisa asks, a concerned expression on her face.

He shrugs, pretending not to care of the matter. "Who knows?" he simply say. "Anyway, if that's all you're going to talk about, I'd rather get going with my missions." The Cavalry Captain walks away without letting either of the two say anything. Lisa sighs at the retreating captain. "Both of them really are like couple in quarrel," she states, resting her cheeks on her hands. "I find it very cute." Lisa keeps going on about how you two acted like a couple even though you two obviously weren't. Jean looks over at the witch with dismay and shook her head.

You and Kaeya really showed the citizens of Mondstadt of how you two were at war at each other. Kaeya had started to become a grouch and cold while you were fuming with a fit of anger and it showed in everything you do- from training and wiping out hilichurls to simply eating and easy chores.

"We should get (Y/N) to do something else right now, rather than let them wait for Kaeya's orders," Jean says, knowing that even if Kaeya got a mission for you, you won't even listen to him and go do your own thing. It was also bad for you to linger around the city and throw passionate anger into everything you do as citizens reports how an underling of the Cavalry Captain is scaring away people- be it customers or the people themselves.

You were heading off to the training area to train even more. Although you were kind of sore from training from morning till night yesterday, it didn't keep you from training today so that you can make the blue-haired male take back the words he said to you two weeks ago. "You're not capable in doing these alone!" The words rung repeatedly in your head and made you even more angrier, but mostly saddened.

As much as you appreciate Kaeya's concern of your safety, it can sometimes make you question your worth. What are you good for if you are basically told to sit back and do nothing? That's not why you became a knight in the first place; you wanted to seek thrill while protecting the citizens of Mondstadt and you won't improve if he tells you to slack off.

"(Y/N)," a voice calls from behind you, stopping you on your way to the training grounds. You turned around to see the Acting Grand Master with a couple sheets of paper. You guessed it was most likely missions for you. "Are these tasks?" you ask, no sign of hostility in your tone as you spoke with the blonde.

"Yes, we're short of hands right now and was hoping you could take a look at them," she said and hands you over the papers. It is true that since the Grand Master took most of the knights, there aren't a lot of knights left in the city. But, the tasks given to you can be given to any other knights at any time; Jean just wants to help you clear your mind. "Okay, I will. Thank you!" A flare of determination and excitement reflected your hyped tone.

Jean smiles before waving bye and getting to her own things. You look at the papers in hand, seeing that some would take longer than others, but can still be done all today. Not caring to read the full details, you headed to the locations written and wipe out any and all enemies.

In the end, you did clear them all and felt really proud of yourself that you managed to do all tasks alone. You kind of wanted to boast at Kaeya's face but you were too prideful let that happen.

You were making your way inside the city, now late at night, feeling even more sore than yesterday. Although it was hurting you, it felt rewarding since you haven't done this much moving around under Kaeya's orders.

When you got home, you went straight to your bedroom, rather than eating dinner and washing up. You felt the stinging soreness wash over your body when you were taking of your shirt. "Ack!" You immediately lower your arms as a reaction to the pain. "I should deal with this.." you mumbled. You decided to deal with it tomorrow since you don't have the energy to do so tonight.

The next day, you went to the training field, albeit still sore from two days worth of strained movements. The pain really made you question if you had done anything at all to contribute to the Knights of Favonius; you see the Acting Grand Master put her all into everything and the build up of stress and strain on her, Outrider Amber running around and helping anyone who she comes across and scouting areas around Mondstadt, and even the traveller from some place else is doing something much greater such as helping Dvalin, but what about you? You felt miserable.

You headed to the Knights of Favonius' headquarters to see if Jean could give you some missions for today. You knocked on the door lightly and entered when you hear a quick and muffled 'come in'. "Good morning. Sorry to bother you this early in the morning, Acting Grand Master," you started, closing the door behind you. "I was wondering if you could give me any more tasks?"

Jean looks up from her work and smiled. "Ah, (Y/N), good morning," she says. "I heard you came back late last night. Did I give you too much to work?" You shook your head immensely. "No, no, it's just the trips that made it long."

"I see. Well, I don't have any missions right now.. Why don't you see Kaeya and ask if he has any for you?" Jean says nonchalantly as she discreetly adds, pretending she doesn't know what is going on between you and him. Your head slightly drops at the mention of his name. You didn't want to go to him- not now, at least. "Ah, he probably doesn't have any either. It's fine, I'll do some training on my own," you said and left the headquarters.

When you said that you'll train on your own, you mean to go search for some dangers that will help you improve. You still are feeling sore all over but dismiss it. You did, however, applied some essential oil to help relieve your muscle pain and thought that that alone would help. You headed out of the city's wall and looked for some tough opponents.

Kaeya's eyes narrowed as he saw you leaving through the gates, a worrisome feeling in his guts, but he wasn't going to let that feeling in the pit of his stomach get to him. He felt that he was in the right and that you were too stubborn. Your stubbornness and prideful personality made him really irritated, but he felt sad that you two didn't get to chat like before.

He shrugs his shoulders and went to bother anyone who he sees- most likely Diluc, who was at Angel's Share at the moment.

Nightfall started to set in and you hadn't returned- no sightings of you ever walking around the streets since thos morning. Kaeya wasn't aware of this since he thought you were home like he had always expected of you. It wasn't until the next day when he was summoned to the headquarters by Jean that he knew of your absence since yesterday. "Hey, what did you call me for?" Kaeya says, his usual, playful smirk on his face. However, that fell when he saw Jean and Lisa's expression and feel the atmosphere of the room. "What is it now?" His stomach started to churn in an awful feeling and only one thing was on his mind- you.

"It's about (Y/N)," Jean starts off, making Kaeya starting to feel even worse. "A ruin guard has been found awoken near the Thousand Wind Temple by someone in the Adventurers Guild and no one has seen (Y/N) since yesterday morning. I have a feeling that they are the one who woken it up."

Upon hearing the news, he clenches his fists and his jaws tightened, a shadowed cast over his face as he narrowed his eyes. But, "What does this have to do with me?" he asks coldly. Lisa and Jean looks over at each other with a concerned expression. "Kaeya--" Lisa started off but was immediately caught of by the male.

"They said that they can handle anything so shouldn't you two put some faith in them as well?" he said, raising his voice in anger, recalling what you said to him two weeks ago. "Kaeya, I am aware of the fight you two had but this has honestly gone for far too long that it's silly," Jean says in a calm tone. "Isn't the reason why you don't allow them on dangerous missions is because you care about them?" This hit Kaeya and he hang his head low. It was true that he cares about you deeply and doesn't show the same feeling to anybody else but you.

He imagined scenarios of situations you could be in right now and it made that feeling inside him snap. He turns around and storms off, shutting the door with a boom.

Praying. He was praying to the Archons of your safety as he feels something went trailing down his face from his eyes. It was blurring his vision but he ignores them, running through the darken day.

When he reached to the location of the sightings, he found the ruin guard, awake and walking, but no signs of you. He quickly disposed of the ruin guard and searched the area for you or anything that was on you that dropped that might give him some hope.

A few metres away, there your body lie on the cold ground. "(Y/N)!" Kaeya runs over to your side and felt his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach. You were all bruised up along with scratches and blood that was either still running from open wounds or had already dried up. Your eyes were closed and he worried for the worse. Rushing to kneel beside you, heb helped you sit up against a rock, putting his hands under your chin to feel for a pulse. To his relief, he found it beating and pulled your body into his chest, one hand behind your head as the other wrapped around your shoulders. "(Y/N)," he whispers your name, his heart feeling lighter.

Your eyes slowly opens from the sudden warmth that engulfed you. "Nngh!" The moment your mind became conscious, the pain from the battle and the soreness from training before suddenly rushed all over your body. "Ack!"

Kaeya immediately pulls away from you, his face full of worry. "(Y/N), are you okay?" he asks. You look at Kaeya with surprise. "Why.. Are you here?" There was no anger in your tone as you were too exhausted. "I came looking for you, dummy. Now, let me take you back so ease up." You gave a quick nod and closed your eyes, falling into another sleep. Making sure you were asleep, he stood up with you in his arms and made his way back inside the city.

He went to see Barbara in the cathedral so that she could heal you. "My, they're badly injured! Hurry, bring them here," she exclaims with a hand over her mouth at the sight of your badly figure and gestures towards the infirmary. Kaeya listened and places you on one of the beds inside and let her do her thing.

She left as soon as she healed any and all visible, major wounds. Kaeya sits down on the wooden chair beside the bed and waits for you to wake up. You were asleep all throughout the day and only woken up the next morning.

You felt something at the side of you and you slowly turned your head but hissed at the sudden pain, closing your eyes in reaction. Although it lessened thanks to Barbara, the pain didn't fully go away.

Once it subsided, you open your eyes to see whatever was beside you. To your surprise, it was Kaeya. His arms were crossed on top of the bed and rested his head on top of it, sleeping with his lips slightly parted. Your heart warmed and remembered the little scene when he hugged your bruised body.

It looked like he slept late and didn't even bother to comb his hair- meaning to say, he didn't go home and return early in the morning. In that moment, you let your pride down as well as forgave him for what he said two weeks ago. You weakly reached your arms out and tucked a strand of his unkempt hair behind his ear.

You suddenly remembered the reason why you two fought in the first place- you went out to a dungeon, alone, on a mission that you secretly accepted without the help of the Cavalry Captain. It was a simple wiping out of a hilichurl camp but there was no knowledge of an abyss image nearby since it wasn't written on the report.

When Kaeya received word you left on a mission, he was upset and immediately left to find you. He found you soon enough, wiping out hilichurls. His eyes looked off to behind you and see a cryo abyss mage. "(Y/N)!" he warned. You turned to look at him and that's when the abyss image shot an ice crystal. It hit your left arm and you roared in pain. Kaeya quickly made due of the image and quickly rushed to check your wound.

"What were you thinking- going out on a mission alone!?" he angrily asked, gripping your upper arm. "Kaeya, you're hurting me!" you hissed.

"I told you time and time again that you should tell me when you're going out!" he said, raising his voice. "I was doing just--"

"Just fine!? You were hit by an abyss mage, goddamit!"

"It's just a scratch--" He cuts you off again, his tone now booming with anger. "Yeah, it's just a scratch, but what about the next time you go out alone? You could be heavily wounded or even worse!" He wasn't listening to a word you said and the grip on you looked like it wasn't loosening anytime soon.

"Kaeya, would you just listen to me!?" you shouted back in the same volume and tone as his. "I am more than capable as a knight to wipe a few hilichurls and an abyss mage!"

His anger didn't subside but he let's go of your arms, head down as a shadow casted over his face. "So, that's how this is going to be, huh? Alright, then I'll leave you be. See if I care." The words broke your heart. Kaeya turned around and left you there with your head down. That was the last time you guys talked to each other before the cold war.

He groans at the touch, making your heart flutter. Then, you see his visible eyelids open slowly, revealing his unique, blue eyes. He straightened up in his seat with a loud yawn before looking over at you. "(Y/N)..!" he says your name, his visible eye showing surprise.

"Good morning," you weakly greet, a gentle smile tugging your lips. A few short seconds passed before he quickly draws you into an intoxicating embrace. You returned the hug as you bury your smiling face into the crook of his neck. "You dummy. Why did you go out and pick a fight with a ruin guard?" he whispers, deepening the hug.

"I wanted you to know that you can depend on me.." you answer, tears starting to form. "I'm not a child that needs protecting; I'm a knight so please look at me as you would to any other knights." Kaeya pulls back and stare into your eyes. "I'm afraid I can't do that," he said, his eyes stern and serious. "What--"

"Because.. You're different," he cuts you off. You look at him with questioning eyes. "I can't bring myself to not care for you nor can I bring myself to treat you like any other subordinates of mine because I love you." The three words that you never thought you'd hear from the Cavalry Captain came out so easily- it's as if he wanted to say it for so long. "I can't bear to lose you, (Y/N). And just seeing you hurt hurts me more than you realize."

"I.." You looked down on your blanket. "I'm sorry that I made you worried.. I didn't know that's how you felt."

"No, I'm sorry. I should have really told you before you got into anymore danger," he said. You two smiled and pulled you back to a loving embrace. Then, "I love you too, Kaeya."

---

[babytaes]

The Arcane Angel

➳ 𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: “ why is it that the good-looking people are always the ones with the mad minds? Several cases of dead bodies have been discovered, and they are all linked. They are often accompanied by a pair of angel wings.”

❥ 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐: jeonghan x female reader

❥ 𝚐𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎: serial killer au, suggestive/smut, angst

❥ 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 6K

❥ 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: there are some suggestive and light smut scenes, if not comfortable with them please don’t engage. Profanity. we have smirky and seductive jeonghan, what a surprise. 

➳ part of the song series 

↳ Because we don't want to behave

Apparently you lost control, you never really had before

Say, ooh you changed, you're not the same

You're different than the way that I loved you

When you turned around and heard a piercing scream, a shadow appeared from the dark woods. You quickly grabbed your phone, switched on the flashlight, and cast it at the shadow.

You couldn't tell what it was because all you could see were some big black wings. You slowly rose with your jacket and stepped closer to the forest, texting Jeonghan to ask about his whereabouts.

“Babe, I didn't exactly follow your instructions about staying in the car, but there's something wrong here. Call me please.”

As you peered up from your phone, you heard a ping from across the ground; he was now in front of you, wings and all. His black eyes gazed into your soul as blood dripped down his wings.

As he quickly caught you and whisked you deep into the dark night, a chuckle escaped his throat.

You didn't notice when he started going missing at odd hours of the day, particularly at night, but you did notice a slight shift in his mood whenever he returned from whatever he was doing.

You didn't want to question him or worse, catch him in the act; you'd understand if he were to come forward, right-?

When you stop talking to Jeonghan, he stops sucking on your neck. He dipped his finger into your folds, eliciting a moan from your parched throat. As your body whimpered as your high passed over you, he moved his digits faster and faster.

You both went limp as you collapsed on the bed, gasping for air, your body aching for relief as you slid the water from the bed stand gulping it down.

Jeonghan returned from the bathroom with a washcloth and gently washed you up while kissing the swollen region and giggling as he saw your reaction.

The aftermath was the best part of sex. How could someone who was so rough and passionate yet be so caring and kind? You leaned against your arm, watching him clean up the dried cum that had splattered all over your and his body.

You blew him a kiss as he finished you up, tossing the cloth in the bin, and ran over to your side, arms open. You scooted over to him and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around his waist, nestling into his chest.

You mumbled a simple question against his skin, which perplexed him for a moment

“Do you love me?”

As he pampered you with several kisses on your forehead, finally landing on your lips as he drew you closer to him, his famous chuckles fell from his lips.

“I'll love you forever y/n” As you closed your eyes and remembered the unforgettable day when you met him on that fateful night, your chest began to move softly.

You were 23 and fresh out of college, ready to live and move anywhere you could, and South Korea was your first stop. Not only did you want to immerse yourself in the culture and admire the stunning architecture, but it was also time to reconnect with some old friends you made on a previous trip abroad.

You had a difficult time understanding the language and finding out the city's customs and all of their wonderful facets. However, with the aid of your college classes and friends, you were able to shape phrases and sentences that would assist you in getting around the area.

You texted your friend Min-Su as you walked to the airport entrance with your luggage, waiting for her car to arrive. A beep alerted you, and you dashed over to the white car, arms outstretched, as she parked and opened the trunk to load your belongings.

As she rushed over to you and wrapped you in a long-awaited embrace, she let out a cry. As you tightly clenched her waist and soaked in this quality time with her, a tear streamed down your cheek.

As you both jumped in the car, a grin grew on her face, and within minutes, you were blasting music from the aux, resuming where you all left off!

“Do you recall the group of boys we met the last time you were here?” You stood up from the sofa, glaring at her grin.

“If you start a sentence with sooooo, you know it's not going to be good.” As you sat back on the sofa, you heard her laugh, and a shadow came to a halt over your body and spoke.

“Well, that's accurate, but they've invited us to a kickback at their place. I did mention you were returning to town after a long absence.”

You jumped from the sofa and dashed to the fridge for a drink as a hand flew to her thigh as she rubbed it. You relaxed on the island while sipping your water, curious about her proposal.

“Will Jeonghan be there."  Min- Su's head whipped around, raising her brows and smiling, she chuckled in your direction.

“Perhaps you'll have to come if you want to find out.” You rolled your eyes at her and walked back to your temporary room, shouting at her as the door closed behind you.

“Text me the details, I'm going to lie down and rest my eyes, and fuck you!”

As you closed your eyes, you heard a snicker, followed by an “I love you too.”

As you blinked away the crust and sleep with your eyes half-closed, trying to block out the noise from the phone, your alarm goes off. Min-Su kindly entered the room and turned off the alarm for you. In response to her behavior, you waved your hand at her.

“Get your butt up, Luv. You must have been exhausted because you slept for three hours straight. “Jet lag.” You awoke suddenly and checked your phone; it had been 3 hours. As you trudged to your suitcase in search of something to wear, an unavoidable yawn slipped out of your throat.

When you reached your bulky suitcase, a stretch took over your body, and a hand flew to your face as you tried to relieve the pain.

“I'm not sure what you're wearing, buttttt you got an hour to get ready."

As you tried to process what she had said, your eyes flew up at her.

A damn hour, to cover up all this. Jeez

You ran over to your phone and switched on your speaker, hoping to speed up the process of getting ready after being awakened by the startling news. With voices coming through the speaker, you hurriedly applied your makeup and found some comfortable shoes before hurriedly throwing on a bag and heading out the door.

“I'm not going to lie, I'm blown away. I look so damn hot. See, Min-Su, you had nothing to be concerned about.” As you approached the entrance, she rolled her eyes at you, where you could already hear voices and music blasting.

Here we go

You cursed yourself as you remembered that you hated going to these parties when Min-su opened the door and was greeted by shouts of random shouting. You didn't like loud noises, and many people made you feel uneasy, but you were always there to have a nice time.

You clutched Min-Su's hand as she led you to the kitchen, which smelled strongly of booze. You noticed a familiar group of people approaching you from down the hall. When you realized who it was, a grin spread across your face.

“Is that Y/N, THE Y/N, it's been a long time, and we've missed you dearly.” Cheeky Seokmin hugged you with open arms, and as you returned the hug, more of the other members came into the kitchen looking for you.

Except for one male, everybody received their fair share of hugs about 5 minutes later. You noticed his figure leaning against the kitchen door frame, sipping whatever he was drinking and paying no attention to you. He had the same appearance as before, except now he had black locks cascading down the front of his forehead. He turned to you with a smirk on his face, eyeing you up and down until he left the room.

So we're playing this game are we now.

When excused to go get some "juice," you swallowed the bitter taste and let out an enthusiastic yell as you flew your hands up in the air, gathering another drink and chasing the prey out the back door towards the pool.

You were already stumbling out the door, even though you had only had two drinks. As you turned around with the biggest smile on your face, a hand landed on your back.

As he shifted you to the closest chair he could find, a perplexed Seungcheol kept you steady. He sat you down and looked you in the eyes. You weren't yet wasted, but you were on your way there, and a few more drinks would have put you out.

When he gave you his cup and urged you to drink, you looked up and took it, perplexed.

“Don't worry, it's just water,” says Seungcheol

You took a swig and chuckled at him as you gasped at his remark.

 “Wait, so the famous Seungcheol isn't drinking?”

“No, hold up, I'm the "designated driver," which means I've just had one drink so far. Someone has to keep an eye on these boys.” He rolled his eyes at you and turned to face the other partygoers who were dancing to the noisy yet soothing music.

A hiccup escaped your throat when you caught a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye. He was looking fucking good once more. You set your cup down and stood up, bowing to Seungcheol and thanking him for the short conversation.

You gathered your courage and approached him; it was almost as if he was teasing you as if he was playing a game with you. When all you wanted to do was fu-

He had already walked up the stairs, waiting for you as you reached the back door before you could reach him. As you ascended the stairs, you saw him reach the last room and excused yourself through the crowd.

“Hello, Y/N, it's been a long time since we've seen each other.” You walked into the room to find him casually typing on his phone on the bed frame.

You sat on the opposite side of the bed, shutting the door, and crossed your arms, laughing at his remark.

“I admire how you put on this show when you begged me to return this summer. “Something must have changed,”   When he looked up from his phone as he got out of bed and approached you, he had a devilish grin on his face.

He took a step closer to you, almost whispering, as he stood over your small frame.

“Says a lot for someone who was basically begging me to fuck them senselessly. “Did you miss something or?” When you grabbed his shirt and yanked him closer to you, he licked his lips. 

“How about we pick up where we left off and see if you can keep your promise.” He pushed you down on the bed and kissed you without breaking the kiss as you tossed his clothes to the side as the last words left your mouth.

He looked up at you with carnivorous eyes and spoke loudly until he hit your core.

“Oh, this is going to be so much fun; I'm so glad you're back.”

And with that, you guys were back to being your usual horny selves.

As you slowly open your eyes and search the room for Jeonghan, you stir in your sleep. It was pretty early in the morning, so he must have gone out.  Your hand grabbed the television remote and turned it on.

The news lady began speaking as you were distracted by your phone, oblivious to the events she was discussing. You dialed Jeonghan's number to see where he was. To be honest, you miss seeing his face first thing in the morning and before he goes to work.

(In News Voice) “According to recent reports, the Arcane Angel has struck once more. At 4:30 a.m., a young man's body was reportedly discovered at the scene off of 3rd Street on Seoul Ave. We've just received news that another pair of angel wings have been discovered at the crime scene, coated in the blood of the deceased. This is the third body this month, for a total of eight bodies in the last three months. To the neighborhood, we ask that you remain safe while we investigate who is responsible. Now let's talk about the weather.” 

You looked up from your phone and gasped at her words; this jerk has yet to be caught. You recall a similar case from when you first arrived a few years ago. And you thought they'd figured it out by now.

The thought of their intentions made you shiver. You took a brief breather before getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom, where you stripped off your clothes and entered the shower.

It wasn't long until you heard the door open and a few voices, as you scrubbed your body trying to figure out who it was. “Maybe he didn’t go to work, you never know with him”

 As you finished up, turning off the water and getting out of the shower, a grin crept across your lips as you heard the bedroom door open and a familiar voice ringing in your ears.

Jeonghan guffawed and dashed to your side, hugging you closely as you wrapped yourself in a robe, pouting as he leaned his head on your shoulder.

“You should have left it open; you know all access for my eyes only.”

You slapped his chest and turned to face the mirror, attempting to do your skincare. Jeonghan wrapped his arms around your neck and kissed you deeply. As your eyes were rolling, you let your neck fall into his arms.

Still, in ecstasy, you let him pick you up and put you down on the counter after he united your rob and tossed it to the side.

“The fact that you can't just let me do anything I want without it leading to more. Aren't you such a needy person?” You chuckled as he rolled his eyes at you, and as your back slumped against the mirror, trying to catch your breath, he started to eat you out while spreading your legs.

As he pulled yourself closer to his mouth in an attempt to build more tension, a cry escaped your throat.

As you tried to talk, you whimpered. “Hannie... faster—faster-fast.  As you held on to his hair for support, your words failed to come out. As he pinned you down, he started to lick harder, and slick juices poured out of you as you panted.

He cleaned the cum off the back of his hand and sucked up the remainder while he laughed at your disheveled appearance.

“Whenever I do that, you literally fall apart.  Also, get ready because I want to take you out today have”

As you walked out the bedroom door, he gave you another kiss on your wet core. You shook your head and gently got up, you laughed and called out to him, tightly securing the robe around your body.

“You can't just spring that upon me after what you just did. Also, It's not my fault you're so good at it.”

You came out of the bathroom in a casual outfit and moseyed over to the sofa, where you were surprised to see more people than you had expected. Mingyu, Hoshi, Joshua, and Seungcheol were all laughing on the sofa, much to your surprise.

You waved to everyone before sitting on Jeonghan's lap and whispering in his ear.

“If I had known there was company, I would have been quieter.” He replied with a chuckle into your ear.

“It's not because I had to prove to them who is mine and who can satisfy you as well as I can. No, it's not me.” As you lay on his lap, shielding your face, he kissed your temple and wrapped his arms around your waist.

As the discussion progressed, the subject of the Arcane Angel crept into the conversation, and everyone's expressions fell silent. You entwined your hand with Jeonghan as you gazed down at your arms. You spoke and looked at the others.

“Do you think this guy will ever approach us; we have no idea what his intentions are. He was pursuing young males last I heard.” As you looked at Jeonghan shaking his head, you felt a grip on your palm.

Why did they not want to talk about this?

 “Why don't we go out now?” Jeonghan said, tapping your arm. “The mood is dropping, and I'd like to hang out with my girl.”

You grinned and stood up, grabbing a coat from the rack and saying goodbye to everyone when you heard Jeonghan calling out to his friends.

“Please don't make a mess, and remind Joshua of tonight; we don't want anyone to be late.”

Joshua gave him a thumbs up and stood there watching as we shut the door behind them, leaving the house silent

As you got into the car, you held Jeonghan's hand as you pulled out of the driveway humming as he entered the lanes.

“So, what were you and Joshua talking about?” “Do you mind if I come?”

As he considered his extracurricular behaviors, he caught a glimpse of your pouty face and broke down inside.

With a shake of his head, he expressed his dissatisfaction

“Not this time, love, me and the guys... we have a meeting” You scowled at his remark as you cocked your head to the side. He locked his gaze on you once more, tightening his grip on you as you crossed your legs aimlessly, staring out the window, oblivious to his presence.

He has gotten good with lying, hmm?

“Babe, please look at me.” As you guys walked into the park, he jumped up and down. You laughed and didn't seem to notice his movements. If you're going to be so mysterious, I suppose I'll follow suit.

As you filmed the scenery with your camera pointing towards the lake, little ducks emerged from the water and walked towards you both. You cooed at the baby ducks waddling around the mother as you walked over to them.

As you got closer to the birds, you talked softly to the smallest one, smiling as you returned your gaze to Jeonghan.

“You know little one, don't get a boyfriend because all they do is lie and hide secrets from their lovely girlfriend.” When you turned around and saw Jeonghan, a grin appeared on your face.

As he looked down on you with a sulky smile on his face, you instantly chuckled and hugged him, telling her that you were just... partly joking.

“I c-could bring you if you really want to go so bad.” However, you must stay in the car.” You leaped into the air and kissed him on the cheek before sprinting past him to a grassy open field.

As you sat out your picnic spread waiting for your smiley boyfriend, you smiled as you saw him jogging up to you.  He arrived and sat down, removing the food from the basket and clearing space for the meal.

You took out two wine glasses, one of which you passed to him, and afterward you went to get the champagne. He watched you with fascination as you poured champagne into his glass.

“Cheers to this beautiful day, and thank you from the bottom of my heart for bringing me on this ride. I believe we both agree that this was something we all needed. With this maniac on the loose, things have been tense, but I'm glad I have you to help me stay safe through it all, I love you.”

He draws you tighter to him and smashes his lips on you instead of his playful smirk that he usually has on his face when you get all gushy. As you scoot closer to him and close in on the empty space, his tongue slips in and out of your mouth

As he caressed your face and patted the open space between his thighs, he pulled back and massaged your head. You slid closer to him and sat in between his lap, kissing his hand lightly and resting your head on his chest, soaking it all in.

It was late at night, about 12 a.m. The atmosphere was much darker than it appeared on the surface. As he pulled into an empty parking lot overlooking a forest, you peered over at Jeonghan. You couldn't tell who was there, but the other boys' cars were familiar.

With a smile on his face, Jeonghan switched off the car and faced you.

“First and foremost, as I previously said, you must remain in the car. I and the guys have this meeting and we will be out late. So, if you get tired or need to return home, I'll leave my keys with you. I'll be able to get a ride home with Joshua. If you get hungry, I have left some snacks in the back. “Are you sure?”

You cocked your head and shook your head, trying to figure out what was going on.

“What are you guys doing in the woods for a “meeting?” It seems suspicious, and it will take that long. Tell the others not to stay out late because the Arcane Angel is still out there.”

He laughed as he rolled his eyes at your joke and took a bag from the back.

“Out there is a little cabin, So it's not just meeting on a  grassy patch. And I'm not sure why they picked that name for him-- I mean for them. I suppose it's catchy. But don't worry about me; I'm capable of looking after myself.”

You snickered as you reclined in your chair, pulled out your iPad, and opened Netflix.

“If you say so, don't forget to kiss me before you go. Remember those movies where the girlfriend kisses the man and then gets murdered? That is something I do not want to happen.”

“I swear, you're such a drama queen.” He kissed you repeatedly before opening the door and waving to you as he approached the other boys near the car. He turned around and waved before walking into the woods.

You shut yourself in for a few hours by turning on the drama you were currently watching. Knowing you, it was only a matter of time before you finished the series, and this quiet time provided you with enough opportunity to do so.

Before you let loose and relax, you took out the snack bag and pulled out some chips, then hit play and settled in for the ride.

 As you turned off your phone, you rubbed your eyes and yawned. When you looked out the window, it had sufficiently darkened, and you checked the time, it was 2 a.m. To get some fresh air, you rubbed the back of your neck and opened the car door.

You gently jumped out and stretched while allowing your legs to regain some energy. You heard a scream coming from the direction of the forest as you walked around for a while. You were startled, but not completely terrified.

As you rushed to the car, grabbing your phone to record for evidence, another scream echoed from the forest.

Maybe it was the Arcane Angel? Imagine the headline, the stunning Y/N Y/L/N caught the Arcane Angel. How cool.

You grabbed your jacket and threw it on and ran towards the direction of the forest, switching on your flashlight to aid you in the moonlight.

Stay in the car, my ass.

As you aimlessly walked through the forest looking for something, you could hear the crisp leaves under your feet as you stomped on them, offering small entertainment. As you move deeper into the trees, you put your hand in your pocket and hug your cold body even tighter.

Why the fuck are they so deep. remind me to not come to these “meetings” anymore

A shadow crossed your path before you could process what had happened. It was hard to tell what it was, but it was moving quickly. It was almost gliding, more like flying.

When you turned around and heard another piercing scream, a shadow appeared from the dark woods. You flung your light at the shadow.

You couldn't tell what it was because all you could see were some big jet-black wings. When you smelt something in the breeze, you took a step back and scrunched your brows in disgust.

It smelt rotten.

When you looked around, you heard more strange sounds that perplexed you. You weren't about to become a statistic. You cursed to yourself when you sent a text to Jeonghan.

“Babe, I didn't exactly follow your instructions about staying in the car, but there's something wrong here. Please call me.”

As you peered up from your phone, you heard a ping from across the ground; he was now in front of you, wings and all. His black eyes gazed into your soul as blood dripped down his wings.

As he quickly caught you and whisked you deep into the dark night, a chuckle escaped his throat.

You screamed and thrashed about in an attempt to free yourself from his clutches, shouting to the dark night for help. Nothing worked, and as you soared through the air, not daring to look up at the figure, you knew you were in for a long trip.

When you knew you were bound in a chair and blindfolded, a chuckle escaped your mouth. From the other side of the wall, you heard a "whoosh" sound. You struggled to spin around to see who it was and what it was after.

“You know, this whole thing makes me laugh so hard. This is what happens when you're nosy. You remember, the nosy ones always die first.”

Before you could process what was happening, a figure appeared in front of you and removed your blindfold. You blinked a lot, trying to take in the light when looking at the person in front of you.

“Fuckin Jeonghan, I knew it was true; my suspicions were right. At the very least, you could've at least been more secretive about it.”

He gave you a puzzled look and coughed at you as he leaned in his chair in front of you.

“Wait, tell me what you're talking about. You knew who I was all along.”

You laughed and threw your head back, unable to believe what you were seeing in front of you. You smirked as you crossed your legs.

As Jeonghan looked at you, a gust of wind came out of nowhere, causing you to break free from the rope spinning around the wisp of cloud, exposing your true identity to Jeonghan.

"Witchcraft"

As he took in the scene in front of him, he gasped and staggered back. As he scrambled to his feet, attempting to appear presentable in front of you, he struggled to get the words out. You chuckled at him and shook your head.

“This one isn't going to sit well with the Council.”

You ran your hand through your hair and shook off the dust from your chilling entrance.

You crept up to him, crossing your arms and placing your fingers all around his neck, soaking it all in. You didn't expect him to learn about you so quickly, but I suppose things happen.

He shook his head and swept his hand through his hair, still perplexed by what had occurred.

“All right, before you start talking, let me get to start. Who are you, and what did you do with my girlfriend, and who the hell do you think you are?" 

You came to a halt and slowly turned around, chuckling in his direction. You leaned in close to his face, whispering something into his ears. The atmosphere had darkened by at least a factor of ten.

“Well, your "girlfriend" is still right here, if you must know. She's just gone for the time being, and I'll explain.   You're welcome to get a drink. I heard you and your "gang" were on their way to a meeting. “How are things going?”

He stood there watching as you talked directly into his ears; he wasn't sure if he liked this new version of you, but it was certainly sexy when you explained your part in the story.

“So, Mr. Yoon, where shall I begin?” Waiting for his answer, you cocked your head to the side and crossed your legs.

“Why don't you just tell me, how do you know the Council?” he thought as he raised his eyes to the side.

As you told him the story, you leaned forward and winked at him with an "ah" smile on your face.

“First and foremost, if you must remember, I am not from here. I'm from The Ode, a small town that you've probably heard of. Anyway, you're a bit of a prick, you know. You cause trouble wherever you go, and when you do, it always falls on our people. Aren't you aware of that-?”

“Well, it is my specialty you know,” Jeonghan smirked and snickered at you.

You rolled your eyes and motioned him to close his mouth with your hand.

“Anyway, The Council figured I'd be a good choice to keep an eye on you, kind of like a guardian angel.  BUTTTTT  I must admit, you have a knack for persuading people. To make it worse, I couldn't stay for long because I had to return to The Ode for mandatory training and other boring stuff.”

As you spoke, you looked at Jeonghan, and he focused on you as your words came out of your mouth.

“Last but not least, they assigned me to look after you after I completed all necessary training. The first time I met was the start of it all, you were still annoying back then-"

“Hey, I mean you still dated me” 

“I didn't mean to "date" you in the first place. Things just started happening and I was in too deep to get out. I'm not upset about it. I've had a wonderful time with you over the last few years, but I've strayed from the mission. The only reason I'm here is to keep an eye on you and keep you from getting into any mischief. Unfortunately, Iook at where we are.”

As he tried to hide his blush from you, he snickered. After that, he gasped and looked at you.

“So, were you sincere in dating me, or was it just part of the plan?”

When you explained yourself, you looked into his eyes. As you said, meeting him wasn't part of the plan, but you were happy you did. You loved his faults and all, even though he was an egotistical ass with a big ego.

“Yes, Jeonghan,” you said slowly as you shook your hand in front of him. I guess you have good hands and good flirting skills.”

“I mean, what else can I say-”

“Shh, I'm not done yet.”

He scowled at you, crossed his arms, and squirmed around like a child throwing a tantrum.

“All in all, I'd say. I'm not sure what will happen to me as a result of my huge disaster on this mission. It wasn't all bad, though. I had a great time with you and the guys and created some new memories that will last a lifetime. Perhaps I will convince the Council to let me stay for a while.”

He sprang from his chair and knelt at your side, pleading with you to do so.

“Please, Y/N, I don't know what I'll do without you.” He secretly peered up through one eye and put on a pouty smile in an attempt to win you over. You chuckled and shoved him to the ground, laughing at his antics.

“Sooo... Which do you want to know first, the good or the bad?'

“Bad news,” Jeonghan said quickly as he rose from the cabin chair.

“Well, the bad news is that we will have to move to a different area. You caused enough havoc in this one that the Council decided to cover it somehow.  The good news is that they're letting me stay; I think I had an effect on you.” You smirked and flipped your hair, laughing at him.

“And where did the guys go?  It's been a couple of hours. It’s 4 a.m. and they're still out?”

Jeonghan gasped and dashed to his phone, chuckling as he brushed his hand through his hair, dialing the boy's numbers.  When you came closer to the call, you could hear the boys' voices and different laughter. He gave you a sidelong glance and rubbed his head, avoiding eye contact.

“Soo bad news... We still have one more guy to deal with, and we can't just let him go. He'll be the last one, I promise. But we have to hurry because the sun is rising.”

Your face was pressed into your hands as you screamed and punched him in the shoulder. He raced around the room, avoiding your savage blows, before bolting out the door.

He spread his wings and teased you in the air as he spread his wings and hovered over you.

“Haha, you don't have any wings,” he teased as he blew raspberries at you. You won't be able to catch me.” 

This bitch really thinks I don’t have wings.

You covered your mouth to stifle the laugh that was escaping your lips, and before you could return the joke, you turned in the air, passing the moon quickly. As you smirked in front of Jeonghan, the rays of light shimmered on your velvety wings.

“So, what exactly did you say...?” 

You smirked at him and flew off into the darkness, yelling at him to hurry up.

He flew towards you, scrunching his brows and pouting.

“Heyy, that's not fair. Yours look way  cooler than mine.”

On your way to the boys' location, you saw Jeonghan flying far ahead of you. He was the sort to flaunt all of his tricks while flying.  As you peacefully watched him, he twirled and twisted in the air, gradually slowing down to fly alongside you.

“So, Y/N, would I have met you if I hadn't been so hot and a killer?” You sneered at his phrasing and pushed him away from you, which elicited a chuckle from him.

“To be honest, I'm not sure. I'm glad, though; you've improved my life in several ways. Living on The Ode became tedious after a while. I suppose you might suggest your heinous deeds drew me in.” You chuckled while covering your mouth, attempting to ignore the cringe that ran down your spine.

As you dropped to the ground, he grinned at you and took your hand, holding you close. He kissed your brow and extended his hand, which you gladly accepted and kissed.

“Now there's my lovely girlfriend.”

“So, what do we have here?” says Jeonghan. He walked up to the badly beaten man and knelt down, laughing at his terrified expression. As he looked up at Jeonghan, the man was terrified and panicked.

“Please let me go. I'm not going to do it again. Please don't kill me, I promise. "  As he turned to face you, Jeonghan cackled, his eyes narrowed into a lethal stare, and his mood darkened. When he looked up at him, the man's breath hitched in his throat. No... your th-the, The Arcane Angel,   As Jeonghan lunged at him and pulled out his heart, splattering blood everywhere as he held it in his hand, inspecting it, he let out piercing screams.

"Isn't it just satisfying, did you see him stuttering when he mentioned my name. The Arcane Angel. It's growing on me.

You look down at your shirt, realizing that blood has splattered all over it. As Jeonghan approached you, tossing the heart to one of the members, you shook your head at him.

He removed the blood that had fallen on your face with his clean hand. He smirked and kissed you on the mouth, wiping the blood from his wings.

“You're very sexy covered in all that blood,” he grinned as he looked you up and down.

You slapped his shoulder as you cringed at his remark.

“I know I am, but could we please hurry up?” I'm getting tired, and you guys still need to clean up this mess. I'll keep this one off the books, but let's get out of here before I lose my cool.” You threw them a pearly white smile as you sarcastically laughed.

The other members chuckled and nodded in agreement with you. You could see Joshua holding the lifeless man on his back as he, Mingyu, and a few others flew away, waving farewell to the rest of us made our way to the cars.

You looked at Jeonghan, who was wiping the rest of the blood off of him with some wipes he found in your bag.  You didn't mind his whole act, you concluded.

Some flaws I can live with.

As you skyrocketed through the air, waiting for him, you chuckled to yourself. He looked at you, puzzled, and threw the remaining wipes into his pocket before flying up to you grabbing your hand.

“Hey, why are you laughing at me?” 

“Because it's strange how quickly you switched it off. Like, go off actor” You bragged about him while raising your hand in the air and waving it around.

As he looked at you, he laughed and shook his head. He realized he had finally met someone who accepted him for who he was, wings and all. He loved your expressions as you continued to describe how he flew at the man like a lunatic.

He inched closer to you and put his finger over your mouth, suppressing your words.

“I know I looked cool, but let's talk about something more positive. Like where the hell we’re moving to, I didn't expect that."

“Oh, yeah, I didn't tell you, The Council will take care of that; all we have to do now is return to the Control Center in T-Minus 8 hours.”

He turned to face forward and said, "Oh," as you both approached the car. As you hopped into the car, sighing at the day before you, your wings both retracted in your backs. You planted a kiss on Jeonghan's cheeks before closing your eyes.

He took one look at your worn-out body and began driving towards home

Thanks for staying with me Y/N.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

➳ Navigate to the Maze

[witcher-and-his-bard-archive]

Not Too Late

doing this thing | day 20 - hypothermia

I guess I’m just really into post-mountain reunion fics this week. I wish I had more time for this (I know I keep saying that, but I have like 10k worth of plot for this one).

Jaskier huddles in on himself, trying to remember what Geralt had taught him about keeping warm. All he can think of is Geralt's face and it only makes him more miserable, so he gives up on the attempt altogether. He's still so cold.

As a last resort, he pulls himself toward the edge of the cliff with the desperate hope that some of his own body heat might bounce back at him. It doesn't work and Jaskier is left shivering under his thin blanket, wishing he hadn't been quite so stubborn after they had parted ways on the mountain. If he had gone after Geralt like he wanted to, like he almost did dozens of times, he might not be here, on the brink of death frozen and alone.

He wonders vaguely what Geralt is up to these days, whether or not he'll miss Jaskier when he finds out about his death, wonders if he'll hear about it. He's probably off somewhere with Yen - nothing can ever keep them apart for long. He hopes he's happy. Geralt is the last thing he thinks about before he shuts his eyes against the world.

Geralt is hesitant as he enters the city, acutely aware of his surroundings, ears pricked to any sign of danger. He's fully aware that most of the people here probably hate him, but the offer for the contract had been too good to pass up. Things haven't been great lately - or maybe that's just him - but he hasn't been taking as many jobs as he should and the winter will be setting in soon, he needs provisions before he heads north.

He heads to the mayor's house because the notice was unsigned, but he's quickly turned away, sent in the direction of the academy. It feels like a trap and he's not enthusiastic about walking right into it. But he knows he was awful to Jaskier, knows that if this is a trap, he probably deserves whatever he has coming. He's not at all expecting what he gets.

The professor he's been sent to is a young woman close to Jaskier's age and she smiles at him when she sees him, but he can smell the nervousness on her.

"Master Witcher," she says, "I wasn't expecting you to be quite so prompt."

"Monsters don't just wait around to be killed," he says and she gives him an odd look. He's used to odd looks, especially when he mentions killing things, but this one is new. It's less nervous, more sheepish.

"Ah, well, about that. Actually, sir, there is no monster. It's just you see, our Jaskier's gone off somewhere and no one's seen him for days. It's getting cold and he never goes off without telling someone." Geralt stares blankly at her, waiting for her to get to the point and hoping it isn't what he thinks it is.

"You see," she continues, "we've all heard the stories about how you never turn down a man in need and how you're the best tracker there is and, well, who better to go and find Jaskier than his best friend?"

Ah, fuck.

But he's only been gone a couple of days. Surely, that isn't unusual? And if he's gone on purpose, surely the last person he wants to see coming to collect him is Geralt? How could he want anything to do with him after the things he said? Even Yen is still upset with him and he didn't blame her for everything wrong with his life.

Apparently, he's taking too long to respond because the professor shifts in place and looks up at him hopefully. And because Geralt is a hopeless fool, he agrees. Jaskier could be in trouble after all and Geralt will not be the source of any more hurt for him.

"Do you need something of his?" she asks and Geralt barely resists rolling his eyes.

"I'm not a dog." And besides, there's nothing in the world that could make him forget a scent when it's absence has been haunting him for months.

He sets out immediately, asking around for any information on where he would have gone and all of Jaskier's peers seem delighted to see him. He doesn't understand. It's confusing and overwhelming and Geralt is happier when he leaves the city gates and heads out into the wilderness. He keeps to the riverbank; a heavy snow fell only a few nights back so looking for tracks is useless, but Jaskier knows to keep to the edge of the Pontar. That's how they find one another every spring.

The thought eats away at him. This coming spring will be the first for years that he hasn't met up with Jaskier and it's an uncomfortable feeling not knowing what Jaskier will get up to, where he'll be. Whether or not he'll be safe.

It's hours before Geralt finds any sign of his missing bard and he's worked himself into a panic in the meantime. What if Jaskier's been taken? What if he's run off and gotten himself kidnapped - or worse? He can't keep his mind from reeling and when he finds signs of a failed campfire off toward the treeline, he stumbles in his rush to reach it.

It shows nothing, but there is a trail leading away from it, deep footprints made more shallow by the newly fallen snow. Geralt follows the path to a large, rotting stump and at its base- fuck.

Jaskier is huddled in on himself, his skin a haunting bluish-grey and Geralt drops to his knees in the snow. He tugs him close instinctively only now able to hear the sluggish thud of his heartbeat and a little of the fear eases away. He's still alive, at least, but Geralt needs to get him warm - and fast. He bundles Jaskier into his arms, relieved to find his limbs still moveable, and carries him to the first place he can find shelter.

Oxenfurt is much too far to travel with him like this, but Geralt is familiar enough with the area that he finds a shelf of rock without much trouble. He's loathe to leave Jaskier even for a second, but he needs to get a fire lit and there is little he can do with the few sticks lying around. He tucks him up against the back of the shelter, wrapping him in his cloak. For a second, Geralt pauses, pressing his forehead to Jaskier's and breathing a silent apology before tearing himself away.

It's hard to find usable wood under the snow, but he manages and clears a space in the snow to build a fire. It's rough, but igni will get anything lit, so he doesn't mind. Once it's burning, he turns back to Jaskier, cupping his face in one hand.

"Jask," he says, "are you with me?" There's no response and Geralt takes a steadying breath, his thumb rubbing absently over Jaskier's cheekbone. "Okay," he says to himself and gets to work.

The first thing he has to do is get Jaskier out of his clothes and while he knows it's necessary, it still feels like an intrusion. But his clothes are soaked from the snow and sitting in them will only make things worse. He gets Jaskier undressed and turns to lean against the wall himself, hauling Jaskier into his lap. Getting out of his own shirt is much more difficult, being unwilling to let Jaskier go for a moment, but it's necessary; skin to skin contact is the easiest way to warm someone.

He wraps both blankets around them and he holds Jaskier close, tucking his head under his chin and shutting his eyes. He focuses on every inch of the body pressed against his own, rubs his arms, breathes against his neck.

"Please," he whispers, "come back to me."

Geralt has no recollection of drifting off, but he wakes with a start to something - someone - moving against him. There's a pained grumble and Geralt's arms instinctively hold him tighter as Jaskier shifts slowly in his lap. He presses his nose into Geralt's chest, humming quietly before stopping abruptly and twist himself to look up at Geralt.

"You know," he starts and his voice comes out raw and rough. Geralt hates the sound of it. "If you wanted me naked in your lap, all you had to do was ask."

He's bleary and still looks half-alive, still too cold and pale for Geralt's comfort, but he's okay. Geralt could cry with relief. Instinctively, he hauls Jaskier closer, bundles him up against his chest and buries his face in his neck. It's another hour or so before either of them moves and then it's only for Jaskier to pull his cold fingers from Geralt's chest.

"Put them back," Geralt mumbles and Jaskier pulls back to look at him - as much as Geralt will allow.

"You always get mad when I touch you with my cold fingers," he mumbles. Geralt brings his own hand up, slipping his fingers between Jaskier's and lifts his hand. Without thinking, he presses a soft kiss to his palm, lingering longer than he should as he mumbles,

"I never will again, I promise.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

Unexpected Places (Pt. 10 of 11)

Pairing: Ivar the Boneless X Reader/Bjorn X Reader

Word count: 2.7 K

Summary: As a princess, you've lived in a golden cage all your life, always a piece on someone else's game. But everything changed when the Norsemen came crushing down on Wessex, like waves in a violent storm. Their king spared your life and decided to take you with him to his kingdom, in what felt more like a rescue than a kidnapping. There, you were not only confronted with a completely different culture and lifestyle, but also with two of his sons. The oldest one has his eyes set on you, but it's the youngest one, Ivar, who gets who claimed your attention since the first sight. And he seems to have an unnamed interest in you. Of course you hoped whatever that was would pass, but when unexpected feelings start to flow a different way, things begin to change.

<- Previous part (09)

Next part (11)->

{Vikings Masterlist}

×

A Lot To Celebrate

You're not a poet, and you surely weren't born with literary talents. But if that's something you learned after coming to Kattegat, is that you can feel. And you feel it, the distance, the days that don't seem to pass by. Aslaug takes you to everything she has to do, alongside Helga, Torvi, and some other women. The weather is quite nice, and you're not cold all the time. Kattegat is a completely different place, but you do find ways to enjoy it. The town is empty, less loud than it used to be. And it doesn't help when Ivar's absence hits.

It usually happens in the morning, or the evening. When you wake up, with nobody lying next to you, and right before falling asleep. You miss Hvitserk too, and even Ubbe. Bjorn... Not really.

Aslaug started talking about marriage after a while, making you blush so hard you feel like you'll burst into flames. You haven't spoken to Ivar about it, and you don't want to take things too fast. But secretly, you enjoy making plans, and you even give some ideas of what you'd like. The celebration is quite different here, and you can actually have a say in what you want and what you don't.

You start getting impatient when the winds start blowing colder, a sign that summer is passing. And you can't even begin to describe your happiness when the news arrive of the boats returning. The town bursts into life, and you decide to pick up some flowers in the woods to make yourself a crown. Helga comes with you, happy her husband is coming back. Searching through the forest, you put the flowers you like on a basket, holding the bar of your dress out of the way as you climb a small slope.

“What do we have here?” The voice doesn't belong to Helga, that's obvious, and it makes you turn around, freezing when you find two men standing some feet away.

Looking at the sides, you see Helga, way too far among the threes, oblivious to your company. “What do you want?” You ask, fingers holding the basket a little tighter. “The warriors are returning from England.”

“We know.” The tallest says, walking over you. “We were heading to Kattegat but now that we found a pretty girl like you...” He smiles, and his friend circles around you, making it impossible for you to run. “...We thought we could use a little distraction.”

“(Y/N)?” Helga calls, and you look her way. She comes running, grabbing your arm when she reaches you.

“One for each.” The one standing behind you says. “That's an improvement.”

“If you touch any of us, Ivar the Boneless will know.” You speak fast, holding Helga's hand.

At the mention of Ivar, the one before you steps back, squinting his eyes. “Ivar isn't here.”

“He's on the boats about to arrive.” You explain, trying to keep your voice steady. “I belong to him now, and I'm sure you know Ivar is very possessive of the things he owns.” Pulling Helga with you, you start walking.

“Are we going to let them go?”

“I won't piss Ivar off.”

“We'd be done with both of them and far away from Kattegat before he even gets here.”

“Run.” Helga whispers and you both set in motion.

You're not sure if they're following you or not, but you don't stop until you're back in town. The basket and the flowers were left behind, you're not sure where, but it doesn't matter. Once you're surrounded by people again, you try to catch your breaths.

“Are you alright?” You ask, running a hand through your hair.

“Yes. You did right back there. Talking about Ivar.”

“It wouldn't stop the other one.” Taking a deep breath, you start walking again. “It doesn't matter. Not now. They're almost here.”

“You tell Ivar about that. They'll probably come to Kattegat.”

“I will.” But not now. As you walk to the deck, the first boats are already here, and you're immediately looking for Ivar.

The fear from moments before vanishes when you finally spot his boat, sailing way too slowly for your taste. When it finally stops, you push some people out of the way, unable to just stand there and wait. When you see him, you get the same feeling you had on the first time those blue eyes met yours. Smiling, you watch as two men help him out of the boat, putting him on the ground. You're not sure why he's not with the clutch but you don't care. Kneeling, you sit on your legs as Ivar crawls over you. Your heart is trying to beat its way out of your chest it seems, and you feel relieved to see he's not wounded.

“Hi.” He says, a funny smile on his lips.

“Been a while.” Ivar settles down, hands resting on his lap.

“Sorry if I'm not standing, princess, but–”

Grabbing the collar of his leather vest, you pull him into a kiss. Standing, crawling, it doesn't matter. Ivar is back, alive and well, and you'll have him all winter.

“Do you have to do that here?” A very annoyed Ubbe complains, making you pull away and laugh.

“Hello, Ubbe.” You stand up, giving him a quick hug. “It's good to have you back.”

“It's good to be back.” He smiles, walking away, and greeting some people.

“Hvitserk?” You ask Ivar, at the same moment you see him coming your way with his father.

“I'm still here,” Ivar complains when you step away a little to hug Hvitserk and Ragnar, welcoming them back.

”Don't be jealous.” You tell him, keeping his pace as he crawls through the deck. “Let's get you cleaned up. You have some blood on your clothes that I know it's not yours.”

Ivar simply giggles, and that's all the answer you need.

Ragnar's house is very, very loud tonight. You hear them from inside your bedroom as you dress up for the biggest feast they have here. To celebrate those who came back alive and to honor those who didn't. Once you're ready, in a new, beautiful dress, you sneak your way to the main hall, but you stay behind the leather-like curtains, a few feet away from Ragnar. He glances at you, smiling.

“Ivar isn't here yet.” He says, and you raise your eyebrows.

“What makes you think I'm looking for him?” Shrugging your shoulders, you're happy he's too far to see your blushing cheeks.

“I know a lovebird when I see one.” He mutters, giggling.

“Fine, old man.” Rolling your eyes, you step back, waving at Ragnar before turning on your heels and heading for Ivar's bedroom.

The halls are empty, obviously, and your footsteps echo. You're not sure why Ivar isn't at the feast yet, so you softly knock on his door instead of just pushing it open.

“Who's it?”

“Me.” You answer, wondering what's about with his angry tone. “Can I come in?”

“I'm bathing.”

“And?” Your brain is somehow slower than your body because you only process what Ivar said when you're already inside. “Oh.” You mutter, seeing Ivar in a huge tub. Pushing the door close, you clear your throat. “Sorry... I can leave if you want.”

“No, I...” Stuttering, Ivar settles down again, his back at you. “There are just some things you don't have to see.”

“Like your legs?” You decide to just say it, noticing, even though he's looking away, that he nods. Slowly, you make your way to where he is, and you can't help but notice his tub is like three times the size of yours. For the legs, probably. The closer you get, the more restless Ivar gets, as if he's trying to hide himself. “Your hair is dripping.” You whisper, stopping behind him. “The floor is all wet.”

“They'll clean it up after.” He snaps, turning his head to look at you. “You don't have to–”

“To see you?” Walking around the tub, you just look. You know why they call him Boneless now, but you were expecting something far, far worse. Slowly, you raise your stare until you meet his eyes again.

Ivar expects you to leave. You can see it in his eyes. He expects you to leave and be with someone else. Probably, Bjorn, you think. But no. You don't want anyone else, and you need to show him that.

Taking a deep breath, you pull the skirts of your dress up to your thighs, stepping inside the tub. “What are you doing?” Ivar asks, a low chuckle escaping his lips. As you lower yourself, the water spills out, and you pity whoever will have to clean this up.

“This tub is huge. It fits two.” You answer, settling down, straddling his hips. A smile breaks through his lips, and you feel your heart warming up. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you sigh. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.” Ivar brings a hand to caress your cheek, and you close your eyes.

“And I need you to know that I don't want anyone else.” Whispering, you place a lingering kiss on his lips. “I want you, Ivar. Crippled and everything, I love...” Your voice fades as you realize the word you just said. Biting your lip, you clear your throat. There's no reason to hide it, it's true. And he has to know. “I love you.”

“Marry me.”

Whatever you were going to say next, it gets stuck in your throat. You can't help but wonder if you heard him right, and then, you just expect him to laugh, to say it was a joke. But Ivar just stares at you with a serious face. “A-are you for real?” You stutter, looking for any signs of doubt on his face.

“I am.” He nods, his thumb caressing your lower lip. “I want you to be my wife.”

Smiling, you pull him into a kiss, fast and passionate, that leaves both of you breathless in no time, forcing you to pull away. “Yes, I want to be your wife.” You tell him, unable to keep the smile from your face.

“Then buy a new, pretty dress, and make a flower crown for the wedding.”

“Well, I was going to make a flower crown to welcome you back but...” Helga did say you should tell Ivar, but you don't want to ruin the moment, it just happened that the conversation flowed this way.

“What?” He inquires, already aware something is wrong.

“I went to the woods with Helga when we heard the boats were coming to pick up some flowers but these two men showed up and surrounded me.” You speak in a low voice, not really pleased on remembering it. “When I said I was with you one of them backed off immediately, but the other said they could be done with both Helga and I before you got here. So we ran.”

Ivar's expression changes and you get now why people fear him. It feels like he could burn those men alive by just thinking about them. “Are they here?” He asks, voice clouded by fury.

“They said they'd be coming to Kattegat so probably yes.”

“Then let's get out of this tub and join the feast.” Ivar kisses you on the lips before holding your waist and pushing you up.

It's not like you could stop him, so you just do as he says. Your dress is ruined, so you go back to your room to put on a dry one. Half an hour later, you're entering the main hall, hand in hand. Ivar gives you a look that you already know what means. He wants to know if they are here, so leaving him standing by the thrones, you walk around, eyes scanning through the people. You're about to give up, thinking they had the decency not to show up when you eye Helga, and she tilts her head to the side. And there they are, chatting, unaware of the rage that will rain upon them.

Turning around, you find Ivar's eyes set on you. Feeling brave, you walk over to the two man, with their backs at you, touching both their shoulders. They stop suddenly, curiously looking at who's behind them. But when they see you, their expression change, as if they've just seen a ghost.

“Hello again.” It's everything you get to say before some men, ordered by Ivar, come to take them away as they desperately try to fight, saying they're sorry. But it's a little too late for that.

“Now that the trash was removed...” Ivar raises his voice, and a silence falls on the hall. Making your way over him, you blush a little, taking his hand. “...I want to announce that Princess (Y/N) and I are getting married.” The hall bursts into cheer as people raise their cups and celebrate.

Aslaug comes to hug you and her son, a smile that means she already knew this was coming. Ragnar comes next, then Helga, Floki, Torvi. Hvitserk comes running, hugging, and spinning you around, a bright smile on his lips. Ubbe does the same, telling his brother something you couldn't hear. Bjorn only nods from a distance before walking away. You're so happy now that it hurts to see him so bad. Sighing, you grab Ivar's arm.

“I'll go speak with your brother. I'm sure the news didn't sit well with him.” You know about the growing jealousy between the two brothers, but everyone will have to learn to deal with it. Nobody is going anywhere, and the best you can do is try to make things work out.

Ivar gives you a look, not happy about it, but sighs and nods. “He'll try to convince you to marry him instead.”

“Then he'll lose his time.” Placing a kiss on his lips, you smile and go where you saw Bjorn walking to. You find him outside, drinking what's left of his cup before letting it fall to the ground. Pulling your cloak tighter, you slowly approach him. “I'm not the only princess out there, you know it, right?”

Bjorn turns around suddenly, furrowing his eyebrows. “Came to make me feel better?”

“I came to tell say that you don't love me, Bjorn.” Walking over him, you stop when you're closer. “You love the idea of the prophecy being fulfilled.”

“Don't act as if you know me.”

“I may not know you, but I know this.” Raising your voice a little, you take a deep breath. “Maybe the Seer wasn't talking about me.” You don't believe their Seer or the things he says, but if it's to make Bjorn feel better, to put some sense into his head, you don't mind bringing him up. And, you did learn a lot about their culture, and you know how things work here. “If it was, I wouldn't have fallen for Ivar.” Friendly, you touch his arm. “I assure you who the Seer saw wasn't me, so don't waste the time you could use finding love. This... This is what was supposed to happen, Bjorn. And what's supposed to happen to you will come, I know it.”

Despite the nod, you don't think he's convinced. “You're very beautiful.” Bjorn says in a low voice, and you blush, looking down and muttering a ‘thank you’. “I never thought anyone would really love Ivar, and to know someone looking like this chose him over me.” He giggles. “It's insane.”

“Well, thanks for the compliment. But it's not about choosing him over you. And it's not about him being a crippled and you having normal legs. It's about the heart.” Shrugging your shoulders, you see when Bjorn looks at something behind you, and you know who it is. “The heart is a wild creature, Bjorn, it loves who is loves and... Mine loves Ivar.” Giving him a small smile, you step back. “Yours will find someone too.” Turning around, your smile grows bigger when you see Ivar, walking over him and taking his hand on yours. “Let's go back in there. We have a lot to celebrate.”

×

@multific @revolution-starter @crackhead1-800 @youbloodymadgenius @clown-boyyy @kitten0394 @castielsangelx-blog @goldlion07 @midnightmystic @readsalot73 @xvxcarolinexvx @momowhoo @fangfoxy @msrawog @walkingonshunshine @alytavzla @anotherfan07 @heavenly1927 @msrawog @alexhandersen-marcoilsoe-fandom

[cherienymphe]

Protect & Serve V (Steve Rogers x Reader)

WARNINGS: Cop!Steve, NON-CON, mentions of violence and murder and assault

IF ANY OF THIS OFFENDS YOU, PLEASE DNI

➥ {page breaks done by @whimsicalrogers}

summary:  escaping an ugly past, you have no choice but to return home. While much has remained the same, Officer Rogers is a new addition who has won over the hearts of the town in your absence. And no one believes you when you start to see him for who he really is

~

When you woke up, you felt like you’d slept for days. Knowing Steve, and having no clue as to what he injected you with, that might be true. You had dry mouth, that much you could tell, and your head still felt like it weighed a ton. Peeling your eyes open was rather difficult, but when you did, you realized that you were in a different room from the one before.

You pushed yourself up to lean on your forearms, looking around and listening. The house was quiet, a far cry from the last time you were here. You guessed that all of Steve’s guests were gone, and you didn’t know if you should be relieved or not. You didn’t know why you thought their presence would protect you when it wouldn’t. They had literally helped Steve recapture you after also watching your unconscious form be carried into his house to begin with. Maybe it was better that they were gone…

Now you could start formulating another escape without them around to catch you.

A stabbing pain struck you behind your eyes, and you squinted, bringing your fingers up to pinch the bridge of your nose. You cursed Steve to hell and back. Why had he given you the option of walking back with him when he was going to do what he wanted anyway? Did he get some sick pleasure out of it all?

Speaking of pleasure, you noted the soreness in between your thighs and wondered if Steve had done a lot more to you while you were out. He’d said that it wasn’t his style, but he couldn’t be trusted. You pressed your thighs together and winced, sitting up. Just as you considered what to do next, the bedroom door opened.

You sharply inhaled as Steve filled the doorway, heart rate picking up at the sight of him. Was it crazy that you were more terrified of him than you had been of your ex-husband? At least with Killian, you had grown to know what to expect. Steve had shattered every one of your expectations.

“You’re awake,” he said, stepping further into the room.

You didn’t know what to do, so you just stared at him as he approached. For your own sake, you needed to keep your eyes on him at all times. Escape was your top priority, and you had to think smart about it. He gripped your chin, turning your head to the side to gaze at your eyes, and hummed, clearly satisfied.

“You’ve been asleep for almost an entire day,” he informed you, grabbing your arm.

He helped you out of bed, and you let him. Your body was still fighting off whatever he gave you, and you stumbled. Steve was more than happy to catch you though, arm thrown around you, hand digging into your shoulder as he leaned you into his side.

He was patient as he helped you out of the room and down the stairs. The smell of food hit you, and you sniffed, stomach grumbling. Steve heard it and chuckled.

“I made breakfast,” he said, leading you into the kitchen.

A modest dining table was on the far side, and your eyes fell to the food laid upon it. You couldn’t trust him, having no idea as to what he wanted from you, so there was no telling what was in the food. However, you couldn’t afford to not eat. Steve turned his back after helping you sit down, and you glanced through the living room to look at the lake on the other side of the window. Getting across that lake was your best chance…

Too busy staring, you didn’t notice him approach until your hands were being handcuffed to the arms of the chair. You gasped, and he did the same with your ankles. Forgetting about your injury, you jerked your legs, only to cry out at the pain that traveled through your ankle. Steve hummed at that, sitting next to you.

“You gave Bucky and Sam hell. Thor too,” he added.

You watched as he picked up some scrambled eggs on a fork before bringing it to your lips. Realizing that you didn’t have much of a choice, you reluctantly parted them. The food tasted good enough, and he fed you again.

You licked your lips.

“You sound surprised,” you whispered, eyes meeting his.

A faint smirk was on his lips, and he chuckled.

“Not surprised…impressed. I like a fighter,” he said, reaching out to grab his glass of water.

He never broke his gaze from over the rim of the glass, and you blinked.

“…but I could tell that from the first moment I met you. So reluctant to accept a ride from a nice small-town cop-.”

“There isn’t anything nice about you,” you sneered.

Steve chuckled, nodding fondly.

“I suppose you’re right about that,” he agreed. “Nevertheless, the average person doesn’t pick up on that. Of course…you would…”

You glanced away as he fed you again.

“…tell me about him,” he eventually said.

You looked back to him with a frown. You knew who he was talking about, and your heart clenched. He pressed his elbows into the wood of the table, hands clasped together as he eyed you.

“Your ex-husband,” he elaborated.

You heaved a deep sigh, frustration coloring your tone.

“Why?”

“Because I want to know,” was his simple response.

You swallowed, a shiver climbing up your spine as you thought about the other blond man in your life.

“What…what do you want to know?” you wondered with a shrug.

He reached out to brush a finger down the side of your face, running it over your bottom lip.

“Tell me why you stayed,” he quietly demanded.

Figuring there was no harm in humoring him, you answered.

“I…was afraid. I had nowhere to go and…part of me…felt like I was being punished. Like I deserved it…”

“For what?”

“For leaving my family and friends behind,” you murmured. “For ignoring them for years…”

Steve nodded at that, pulling his hand away.

“I am sorry about your family. I meant that when I told you that. They were good people,” he replied.

You blinked. Of course, he had known them. How could he not? It didn’t sit right with you that someone like him had interacted with your family…especially while you weren’t around. You wondered how he behaved towards them, if he ever made any of them feel as uncomfortable as he did with you.

“The funerals were lovely. Was he the reason you didn’t go?”

You suddenly found it hard to swallow, and tears kissed your eyes as he brought that up. He reached out to brush a rogue one away, and you jerked away from him. Missing the funerals of your family was definitely your biggest regret. Every time you thought about it, your hate for Killian grew.

You didn’t have to answer because Steve already knew.

“Bucky told me that you thought he was the one at your house every night. He said that you had feared he would find you,” he said, making you frown at the mention of the brunette.

You looked down when his hand found yours, brushing circles into the skin with his thumb.

“You don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he murmured, and your frown deepened.

You clenched your jaw, biting back what you wanted to say, and seeing the look on your face made Steve laugh. You looked up at him, gaze cold.

“I know what you must be thinking…that I won’t get away with this…”

He took another bite, leaning back in his chair as he eyed you smugly.

“…but I will. Hell, I’ve gotten away with worse,” he chuckled.

Your brow twitched, and you narrowed your eyes at him, recalling something that Wanda had said.

“Peggy?”

You watched the way his face fell, and you continued.

“Wanda said she’d just…left right after the breakup. I never thought that seemed her style…”

Your tone was accusatory, and apparently with good reason. Steve slowly exhaled, straightening up as he rubbed his hand over his chin, elbow pressed into the table as his eyes gazed at something you couldn’t see.

“Peggy…was an accident,” he admitted, and genuine remorse registered on his features.

Remorseful or not, your eyes still widened as he confirmed what you had initially suspected but brushed off, convinced that your paranoia was getting the best of you. Now, you knew the truth. You weren’t just sitting with a kidnapper, but you were sitting with a murderer too.

“You see, I started having my fun before I came here. I’d help out unsuspecting girls in need. Sometimes they were homeless…sometimes they just needed a ride home…to the store…”

Horror filled you as he spoke, and you started to realize that you weren’t dealing with an amateur.

“They’d get in, and I’d offer them a bottle of water I kept inside.”

Of course, they would. Steve Rogers looked like the poster boy for good Samaritans everywhere. Those soft blue eyes could convince anyone. Said eyes met yours, serious.

“They’d always accept. Either out of genuine thirst or just to avoid being rude, I don’t know. I didn’t care. They’d be knocked out within minutes…”

You felt like you were going to be sick.

“…when I was done, I’d park at wherever they had wanted me to take them to. They’d eventually arouse, and I’d convince them that they had nodded off. None of them ever suspected, and if they did, what could they say?”

He rose an eyebrow.

“The friendly neighborhood cop, Officer Rogers, drugged and raped me?”

He scoffed, and you blinked away tears.

“…and Peggy?” you forced out.

Steve sighed.

“I got tired of the coldness and casualness of it all,” he said with a shrug. “I realized that I wasn’t getting any younger, and Peggy… She was so sweet.”

He sadly shook his head.

“Like every other woman in this town, she was itching at the chance to have me. But unlike the rest, she wasn’t bold about it. She was coy, and I liked that. It wasn’t long before I had her in the palm of my hands,” he chuckled at that. “Literally.”

Disgust churned in your stomach.

“She was everything I thought she’d be. Except…she wasn’t.”

When he looked at you again, his eyes were hard, face taut with tension as he recalled whatever memory you hadn’t been privy to.

“Peggy had plans,” he dragged out, voice low as he took another sip. “She wanted to achieve all of these great things…see the world…leave me.”

He huffed.

“We fought. Things got…physical, and the next thing I know, my hands are around her neck.”

You swallowed, tears spilling over now.

“Jesus,” he quietly scoffed. “I didn’t even realize until I let her go and she just…dropped.”

More tears fell, and he finally took notice. He reached over to wipe them, and you flinched.

“That’s right,” he hummed. “You grew up with her.”

He moved to feed you some more, but you shook your head, appetite lost. He let the fork drop before leaning back in his seat. He turned to look though the living room, eyes roaming over the lake through the window.

“She’s in that lake, you know. I think about her every time I look out onto it,” he quietly said, more to himself than you.

You sniffed, throat tight and chest burning. Fear gripped you, and you wondered if that was going to be your fate. Steve suddenly moved his chair closer to you, and you cried harder. He shushed you, reaching for you to wipe your face with his thumbs.

“That won’t be you. I promise,” he said as if reading your mind, hands resting on the sides of your face.

You shook your head.

“Why me?” you quietly asked him, no longer able to keep it in.

You had to know.

“I could see how broken you were,” he hummed, eyes roaming over your face. “…and I thought that I could fix you. That maybe we could fix each other, hmm? I give you the safety and security and love you’ve been craving for years, and you give me what I want.”

You frantically blinked, eyes searching his face.

“I could see that you wanted me too. Deep down, anyway. After all, I was a good guy. I’m sure Wanda told you something like that, didn’t she? That I would be good for you…and you had thought about it, considered it. I could see it in your eyes that night,” he continued. “Wondering what it would be like to be with a genuinely good guy…”

“I wasn’t ready,” you mumbled.

He took a deep breath.

“I know, but unfortunately for you… I don’t have much patience. At least not when it comes to something I know I want.”

“What…what do you want from me?” you finally wondered.

He let out a breath, brushing his thumb over your bottom lip as he stood, towering over you.

“I want you to look at me with complete adoration as I come inside of you. I want to come inside of you every night, calling you wife while I fill you with my children. I want to make love to you when you’re glowing and round with my child, but…right now…”

He reached for your plate again, bringing some more eggs to your lips.

“I want you to finish your food.”

Too stunned by his admission, you allowed him to feed you, fear gripping your heart at what would happen if you didn’t escape.

When you weren’t locked away in the room, and when you weren’t handcuffed at the table, Steve pretty much allowed you free reign. He was at your side at all times, of course, closely hovering. You figured it was best to seem cooperative. Of course, you didn’t think Steve was gullible enough to believe that you had accepted your situation. You both knew that you were just biding your time. It was only a matter of thinking of a way to escape before he thought of a way to stop you before you even tried.

You feared what he would do to keep you here…feared what he would do if he caught you trying to leave. You thought of Peggy, of how she had simply brought up the idea of leaving and had died for it. Steve’s desires weighed on your mind, and you knew that you only had so much time before he started to go through with them.

That second morning, you had woken up to the feel of a hard chest pressed against your back, a thick arm curling over your waist. It had taken you a moment to understand that the second room you had woken up in was his room. You had jerked in his grip, attempting to get away from him, but your movements had aroused him…in more ways than one.

His hold tightened, pulling you closer, and he groaned as sleep began to leave him. You could feel him poking against you, hard and hot, and you had panicked. You fought to get away from him, and he swiftly pushed you to lie on your back, settling in between your legs. Your hands, having attempted to push him away, were pinned between your bodies as he kissed you.

You gasped against his mouth, and his tongue slipped past your lips, tasting the inside of your mouth. His arms were pressed down on either side of you, caging you in, and you felt like you were suffocating. Steve paid no mind to your aversion, moaning against your trembling lips. One of his hands reached down to wrap around your wrists, dragging them above you until they were pinned just below the headboard.

His other hand slid down your side, kneading your skin as it descended. He ground himself against you, his hardened member poking at you through his shorts. You only had on a nightgown that he’d left outside of the shower the night before. You had briefly wondered if it belonged to Peggy. This very thing was a pressing concern of yours when you noticed the absence of underwear.

His free hand moved to make a home in between your legs, fingers brushing against and poking at you. You bit his tongue, hard, and you tasted blood. He ripped his face away from you with a hiss, and your satisfaction was short lived when he shoved two fingers inside of you to the hilt.

Your chest arched, a choked sound escaping your lips as he roughly fingered you. You turned your head away when he leaned back down, and his lips met your cheek.

“Do that again,” he whispered, lips moving against your skin. “…and I’ll make you pay for it.”

You squeezed your eyes shut as you felt his fingers glide within you more easily now. He hummed, mouth trailing down to your neck, sucking on the skin. You squirmed beneath him, trying to fight off the pleasure that was being forced on you. Your legs kicked around him, and he widened his, pushing his knees underneath your thighs to restrict your movement.

You pushed your wrists against his hands as he added a third finger, stretching you out. A moan threatened to bubble out of your throat, but you swallowed it down, whimpering instead. Steve wasn’t pleased with that. He continued to thrust his fingers in and out of you, thumb coming up to brush against your swollen bud, and you whimpered again.

His hands tightened around your wrists as he sped up, almost painfully so, and he grinded against you. His lips attached themselves to your neck, pulling the skin in between his teeth, laving his tongue over you. He curled his fingers, and a broken moan finally slipped from your lips. He did it again and was met with the same result.

You turned your face as much into the pillow as you possible could, but Steve’s lips sought out your own, covering them in another kiss. He swallowed your moans, groaning into your mouth as your hips bucked against his hand. The hand that was holding your wrists down moved to intertwine with one of yours. You quickly pushed your free hand against his stomach, and when that didn’t work, you wrapped your hand around his wrist.

Your efforts were useless, Steve effortlessly working his fingers into you again and again.

“Stop,” you finally begged against his lips.

“Come for me, and I will,” he roughly replied.

He flicked his thumb over your bundle of nerves again, and you fell apart beneath him. He pulled back ever so slightly, your moans permeating through the air as he looked down at you. A few of his blond strands tickled your own forehead, and his nose kept brushing against yours as he worked you through your climax.

He looked down, eyes focused on the way you clenched around his fingers, hand a mess. Your chest heaved, breath shaky as he tightened his hold on your hand. You’d just woken up, but you felt tired all over again. He finally pulled his fingers out of you, bringing them to his lips and humming.

“Good girl,” he murmured as he kissed the corner of your mouth.

He rolled off of you, and you caught sight of the large tent in his shorts. You looked away, hurriedly pulling your nightgown back down, disgust coursing through you. You didn’t move as he strode into the bathroom and turned the shower on. You only did so when low moans reached you minutes later, and you moved to exit the room, but it was locked. You noticed what looked like a key pad on the wall next to the light switch. You hadn’t noticed it the day before.

Realizing that you’d have to sit here and listen to him get himself off, you sat back down, covering your ears. You were still in that position when he finally exited, a towel loosely hanging on his lips. You watched as he walked into the closet and came back out with clothes that were clearly meant for you. Again, you wondered if these belonged to Peggy. He ushered you into the bathroom before you could give it any more thought.

Your time in the bathroom was quick. Your quick search of the cabinets turned up nothing useful for you. No type of medication or sedatives or anything. You would have loved nothing more to spend all day in the bathroom, but you didn’t want to give Steve the opportunity to check on you and see you naked. The clothes fit perfectly, and it was then that you decided they weren’t Peggy’s.

The idea that Steve found clothes that were perfectly in your size made your stomach churn.

He was waiting for you when you got out, and he reached for you as soon as you were near. One hand went to the back of your neck, holding you beside him while the other went to what you thought was the keypad. You watched in awe as he pressed his thumb against it, and the pad flashed green just before he reached to open the door.

“Buck and Sam are coming by later,” he told as he guided you down the stairs. “I don’t think I need to remind you not to do anything stupid, do I?”

You shook your head.

“Anyway, just in case…”

He stopped before the door of the basement. Apprehension filled you as he opened it and guided you in, his chest brushing your back as you walked. You walked down some stairs, stopping at another door. This one was sturdier and had a bar that fell across it. You watched as Steve lifted the bar and pushed you in.

You stumbled, tripping over your feet before straightening yourself. You could feel Steve behind you as you looked around, and your heart dropped. It was a room, furnished with a single bed, a toilet, and a sink. You swallowed in fear, taking a step back, recoiling when you bumped into him.

Steve wrapped his arm around you, lips at your ear.

“I don’t want to have to put you in here, but I will if you force me to. Is that understood?”

You gave him a shaky nod. His hand closed around your throat, and you gasped, reaching up to grab his arm as he lifted you, your toes grazing the floor.

“I want to hear you say it,” he whispered.

“I understand,” you shakily replied, and satisfied, he let you go.

He spun you around, one hand on your jaw as he tilted your head, lips brushing your cheek and then your ear.

“Be good for me…and I’ll be good to you,” he quietly told you.

He didn’t wait for a response before guiding you up the stairs. You reached the hallway again just as a knock sounded on the front door. He pulled you along, keeping you at his side as he went to answer it.

Sam and Bucky had grins on their faces and greetings on their lips when Steve opened the door. However, Bucky’s face fell when his eyes met yours. You took in the red marks on the side of his face, and you couldn’t keep the smug expression off of yours even if you tried. He let them in, hand sliding around your waist as he closed the door.

You flinched, and he tightened his arm around you. Bucky looked over his shoulder at you, lips curled into a cruel smirk.

“Like the new look?” he wondered, gesturing to his face.

You simply looked at him, and both Sam and Steve chuckled.

“Maybe if you weren’t slacking…” Sam’s words trailed off as they entered the kitchen, but Steve pushed you towards the living room.

He pressed his lips to your forehead before pushing you down onto the couch. You swallowed, watching as he joined Sam and Bucky in the kitchen. Sam’s eyes were on you, and he turned to Steve.

“She’s quiet,” you heard him say.

“No. She’s not quiet,” Steve replied, calculating eyes meeting yours before he ran them over you.

He smirked.

“She’s smart,” he argued.

He looked away, and so did you, eyes looking through the backdoor to roam over the lake. If only you could get to the lake. When the time was right…

Sam and Bucky didn’t stay for long. Steve had waved them goodbye with one arm securely around your waist. You watched them get back into the car, the police cruiser, and your stomach churned, still in disbelief that the supposed good guys were nothing but scum.

You wanted to know how they could be okay with what Steve was doing. You wanted to know how they justified it, and unable to keep it in, you asked him. He didn’t respond right away, instead heaving a sigh as he pressed one hand into the wall beside your head, caging you in.

“After Peggy, I went back to my…casual encounters…”

You frowned at how he worded it, and he chuckled at that.

“…not often like I did before, but just enough to satisfy me… They caught me one day…”

He smiled as if he were thinking back on a fond memory, and you were almost sorry you’d asked.

“They wanted in on it too.”

Your eyes widened as they met his gaze, and your lips parted as you registered what he was saying. He reached up to brush his thumb over your trembling lips, his own parting.

“Eventually Thor got roped in too. His brother Loki prefers to sit out on the festivities, but he doesn’t mind. I don’t think you’ve been properly introduced to them,” he added. “Loki is a lawyer, and Thor is a cop in the next county over. They come over from time to time. Usually for a game.”

Now you were positive that you were going to be sick, and Steve continued.

“Thor wasn’t exactly the most inconspicuous about it when he’s here…and the boss caught on one day. We’re the best cops in town though. We keep these people safe and crime is practically nonexistent, so… So long as we’re discreet, he looks the other way,” he told you.

You turned away from him, tears in your eyes. He pressed his lips to your cheek, inhaling.

“Do you see, now? You have no one to run to. No one will help you,” he whispered darkly, hand landing on your shoulder, digging in, the other trailing to cup your ass. “We run this town…”

He pressed a leg in between yours, and you pushed against him, but he was faster. He grabbed your wrists, slamming them against the wall as he forced his mouth on yours. You kicked at his legs, but it was hard to do when one of his separated yours.

He pulled you away from the wall, lips never parting from yours as he turned and forced you back. You stumbled and tripped over your feet, trying to put as much distance between you two as possible. When that didn’t work, you brought your knee up, and Steve pulled back with a grunt.

Slipping out of his arms, you ran towards the backdoor, but his hands in your hair stopped you. You screamed as your scalp protested his tight hold, and he yanked you back into his chest, one hand closing around your throat. His chest heaved against your back, harsh breaths in your ear.

“Remember what I said,” he whispered, deep voice threatening. “Be good for me…and I’ll be good to you…”

You hadn’t realized you were crying until he walked you forward towards the couch. Your face crumbled as he pushed you down, one hand sliding up the thin dress he’d given you to wear. His hand grazed your bare slit, and you cried harder.

As awful as Killian had been, he’d never forced himself on you. It was crazy to think that in all the years you’d experienced violence at his hand, none of it had ever been sexual. That was a line that he had never crossed.

Steve flipped you, and you immediately fought against him as he ripped at your dress. He caught your wrists, holding them away as he dipped down to wrap his lips around one breast, bud hardened from the cool air in the house. He moved his head to give the other the same attention, and you cried out, pushing against him.

He suddenly jerked your wrist, and you cried out, pain traveling down your arm. He looked up at you, eyes cold as both desire and anger warred within them.

“I will break both of them,” he harshly said, making you freeze.

You couldn’t swim across the lake with a broken wrist, let alone two. He let you go, hands hovering over your own for a while to make sure you would behave. Pleased, he swiftly undressed, and you looked away from him, eyes on the ceiling. He tsk’d, reaching for your chin to turn your head.

“Eyes on me,” he ordered.

Too afraid to defy him, you watched as he grabbed your ankles, spreading and lifting your legs as he moved closer. He was hard and throbbing, bigger than Killian was, and you shook beneath him. There was no warning, no teasing… Steve slid into you with one thrust.

Having been wholly unprepared, you yelped in pain, head falling back on the arm of the couch. He rested your legs on his shoulders, leaning over you as he forced your knees to your shoulders. All of your movement was restricted, and the only thing you could do was press your hands into his waist. A few tears escaped your eyes, and Steve kissed them away.

His breath was shaky, blond hair hanging into his forehead as he savored the feel of you wrapped around him. He rested his forearms on the arm of the couch, caging you in, and you felt incredibly hot being surrounded by him. His lips brushed the corner of your mouth before moving them down to your jaw, nipping at the skin there.

He slowly pulled his hips back until nothing but the tip of him remained inside of you. He was slow to thrust too, and you squirmed, nails digging into his waist. The position you were in didn’t allow for you to do anything other than lay there and take it. Steve gradually began to pick up his pace, and the couch trembled from the force of his thrusts.

You wanted to close your eyes so badly, but you were afraid of what he’d do if you did. His lips never stayed in one place, kissing every part of your face that they could. Occasionally, his hand would brush over your cheek or shoulder. Sometimes he’d reach down and flick his fingers over you. Unable to do anything, you had no choice but to accept the pleasure he was forcing on you.

His skin slapped against yours in the quiet house, and you whimpered as he rested his forehead against yours, blue eyes boring into your own. As quiet as you tried to be, he could see the pleasure on your face, and the corner of his lips curved upwards. He kissed you, slow and soft, and you hated it. His lips didn’t part from yours as his thrusts grew erratic and choppy.

Too many things were happening at once, it was too intense for you, and you turned your head. Steve snarled at that and fisted his hand in your hair, yanking your head towards him again. He kissed you harder this time, slamming into you as he did so. Tears streamed down your face as you felt your stomach tightening, toes curling while you clenched around him.

“That’s it,” he murmured into your mouth. “Come for me…”

You pressed your nails harder into his skin, trying to fight it off, but it was no use. Steve didn’t relent in his movements, and soon, you were coming around him. Your climax struck you like a punch, stomach aching as it tightened, core fluttering around Steve’s unyielding cock. You slapped your hands against him as he fucked you through it, tears in your eyes again.

“Be good for me,” he reminded you, and you shook your head.

You reached in between you to press your hands to his stomach, turning your head away. Steve’s breathing was harsh above you, chest heaving as he thrust into your soaking core.

“Steve,” you begged, pushing against him.

“You’ve got another in you, I know you do.”

Sure enough, it wasn’t long before he threw you head first into another, and your mind spun as a choked moan slipped out of your mouth. You couldn’t swallow it down even if you tried, and Steve groaned. One of your hands was on his chest, the other on his shoulder, but he wouldn’t budge. Your legs trembled, and you involuntarily closed them as you tried to stem the oversensitivity, inadvertently locking them around his neck.

“Steve... Steve, please,” you begged, out of breath.

His lips found yours again, and he growled into your mouth.

“One more,” he whispered. “Give me one more.”

You tried to duck your head, but he followed, lips brushing the corner of your mouth.

“Give me one more…”

Stars appeared behind your eyes as you came for a third time, choking his cock. Steve let out a low moan as you gripped him, the sound drawing out into a groan. You could feel the mess you were making, but Steve didn’t mind as he pressed kisses to your cheek, your jaw, your neck…

“Look how good you are for me. Such a good girl for me,” he mumbled, spilling into you.

You shuddered at the feel, and Steve fucked his cum into you, hissing. He sat up to move your legs off of him, and relief filled you as they fell limply around him. He pressed his chest against yours again, hands cupped underneath your thighs as he lazily moved within you.

“See how good I can make you feel…” he said, lips grazing yours. “…when you’re good for me.”

~

tags:  @xoxabs88xox  @darkficreposter   @mcudarklibrary @captainchrisstan @nickyl316h @buckybarnesplumwhore @harryspet @readermia @sebabestianstan101 @villanellevi @opheliadawnwalker3 @notyourtypicalrose @coconutqueen21  @stargazingfangirl18   @lou-la-lou @izzfizzh @thatgirly81 @autty0314 @hinata7346 @lokislastlove @honorarytenenbaum @void-hoechlin  @autty0314​ 

[amillionmillionvoices]

River/Doctor #7

river/12, kissing scars a bruise

It’s been over a day by the time he notices. A day of skirting around one another, of half-conversations, almost-apologies, broken declarations. She almost tells him what she’s been through, since Manhattan. He almost asks. She almost touches him, fingers ghosting across his arm before they fall away, and she turns her attention to something else. He almost stops her. 

They’re still in the TARDIS, parked near the Towers now, and he thinks perhaps they’re both too scared to mention all the time laid out before them. He thinks maybe she doesn’t want it. Maybe she doesn’t trust him. He wouldn’t blame her, but it knots in his chest, every time she looks at him, like she’s just waiting for him to leave. 

They’ve spent time together and argued about little things—the TARDIS’ bulb, where to put the swimming pool, whether Akorax V is better before or after the Fall of the Emperor. But everything they need to talk about—Amy and Rory, Manhattan, Darillium, Hydroflax, Ramone, the Doctor does not, and has never, loved me—they keep tucked away on their tongues. 

He doesn’t know if it’s the weight of the unsaid, or just the last six months, but they’re bickering over where to order in from when he looks up, looks at her, and for the first time sees how exhausted she looks—there are circles under her eyes he swears weren’t there before, a heaviness to her shoulders, her smile wane. 

He trails off, stares, and River arches an eyebrow. “What?”

He blinks, and frowns. “You look tired.”

“Thank you,” she says with a huff, rolling her eyes, but her hands drop from the menu they’ve been holding together, and she tries to stand straighter. For the first time, he notices her wince. 

“When was the last time you slept?” 

River glares. “When was the last time you slept?”

He can’t remember. He doesn’t feel tired—too anxious to be tired, too afraid, of losing her again before he’s had a chance to make things right. To do better by her, be better for her. 

He doesn’t answer. 

River shrugs him off, and he doesn’t press. They order food and sit in the kitchen and he doesn’t feel like eating. River barely touches her plate. He wants to call her on it, but knows she’d simply turn it back around on him. They pack most of it away in the fridge. 

River disappears to shower, and he wants to follow her. Wants to run his hands over her skin and reassure himself that she’s alive and safe and really here, not a ghost, not a haunting. But she doesn’t invite him and he can’t summon the courage to ask, so he tinkers with the controls and folds and unfolds a newspaper he picked up, full of real estate ads. 

There’s a little bungalow not far from the town nearest the towers. It has bay windows and a garden, or so the ad says. He should ask her about it. If she wants it. If she still wants him. 

He supposes it’s a conversation they should have sooner rather than later. 

Tucking the newspaper into his pocket, he takes his time moving toward their bedroom. Runs over in his mind what to say and how to say it. Practices under his breath being gentle. Being open. His voice still sounds too gruff, too irritated. He doesn’t want to sound like he doesn’t care. Not here, not now. Not with her. Not this time. 

Their bedroom door is cracked open, and he can hear the shower running. Slips inside and stares at the bed they haven’t slept in together for years, still made up. Her clothes are in a pile on top of the comforter, her trowel on the desk in the corner. Her diary’s on the nightstand, her new screwdriver on top of it, and his stomach knots. He looks away, takes a seat on the edge of the bed facing the en-suite door, and fiddles with his ring. 

He hasn’t told her why he wears it, that he wears it for her. Hasn’t told her he keeps his bow tie in his pocket at all times. Hasn’t told her how much he’s missed her, longed for her. Hasn’t told her how badly he wants to bury his face in her hair, how he wants to hold her and never let go. 

He thinks of the aftermath of Manhattan, of the way she’d tried so hard to be strong for him. The way she wouldn’t break. The way he pushed and pushed until she left, taking the rest of his hearts with her. 

The way he hadn’t gone after her, like she should have done. 

He’s made so many mistakes, they make his chest ache, and he knows he doesn’t deserve this, deserve her, but he’s selfish and needs her and he’s so busy trying to come up with the right thing to say to make her realize he isn’t lying that he doesn’t notice the shower turn off, doesn’t hear her moving until the door opens and she’s standing there, hair wet against her neck, towel around her waist, staring at him. 

“Doctor?”

Not sweetie, not darling. 

He swallows. “We need to talk.”

It isn’t what he means to say, isn’t how he means to say it, and River tightens her grip on her towel. She looks down for a brief moment, and he hears her inhale; then she looks up, jaw tight, steeling herself. 

“Talk, then,” she says, as if it doesn’t matter. 

She crosses to the closet and picks out clothes and the Doctor stares at her legs, her back, her shoulders.

“I—“ he starts, and falters. There’s something on her neck that he can’t quite see. “Come here.”

River turns, frowning, clothes in her arms. He gestures, and she rolls her eyes, but comes closer, almost cautiously, eying him with too much suspicion. When she’s close enough, he reaches for her arm, nudging gently. 

“Turn around.”

She huffs. “What are you—“

“Just turn.”

She glares, but does as he says, and he reaches a trembling hand out to move her hair aside. Her shoulder is purple, almost black in some places, worse up close, now that he can see the faint outline of large fingerprints. He hesitates, fingers ghosting over the outline of the bruise, and River flinches. 

“Hydroflax?” he asks, remembers when they tried to escape, the way the robot dangled her off the floor by her shoulder. He hadn’t seen anything, hadn’t known—he supposes her spray is to thank for that, the longer sleeves she’s been wearing since. 

“It’s fine,” River says, and makes to turn but he stills her. 

“Stay here.”

He disappears into the en-suite, comes back with a bottle, a healing salve from some planet or other, he can’t remember. Knows only that it will help her pain. 

“Sit.”

“I’m not a dog,” River snaps, finally, a hint of anger in her eyes, and it relieves him just a little, to see her spark. 

He holds up the bottle. “Sit, please?”

River glowers, but sets down her clothes and perches on the edge of the bed, her back to him as he uncaps the bottle and pours a generous amount of salve into his hands. 

“This might hurt,” he warns, but she merely nods, flinches slightly at the first, barely-there touch of his fingers on the bruise. 

It’s wide and discolored and he hates that he didn’t notice, hates that she didn’t tell him, hates that he let it happen in the first place. That she was harmed. That anyone dared harm her. He clenches his jaw, but it doesn’t stop his words from spilling out, a muttered, 

“Should have put him down the garbage disposal when I had the chance.”

River snorts. 

“I’m serious.”

“Yes,” she says, too casually, “But then I’d never have known who you were.”

He stills a moment. “You think I wouldn’t have told you?”

She shrugs, and winces again. “You certainly took your time.” 

Her voice is even, but he knows better now. Knows it isn’t a joke, and he swallows tightly. 

“I tried,” he says, but they both know he didn’t try hard enough. “Not my fault you’re slow on the uptake.”

He regrets the words immediately, for the way River sighs quietly, says, “No, I suppose it isn’t.” It sounds too much like defeat, coming from her. 

“River…”

“Just say it, Doctor.”

“Say what?”

“Whatever it is you think I don’t want to hear.”

She sounds exhausted, sounds wrung out, and he stares at her shoulder, wishes he could see her face, but he isn’t brave enough. And it helps, almost, to stare at the bruise when he says, 

“I...don’t know…” he trails off, hesitates, reaches out and touches her spine, so gently. “...how to say it.”

There’s silence, long and dreadful, and River doesn’t turn, doesn’t move, barely looks like she’s breathing. 

“Most people just say ‘goodbye.’”

The Doctor flinches. “Is that what you think I want?”

River shakes her head, but still refuses to look at him. “I don’t know what you want.”

Her words hit his chest, and he feels something inside him crack. 

His River. 

His wife. 

And he’s done this to her, made her so uncertain, she won’t even face him. He’s made her so sure that his absence is the only thing she can count on. It forces the air from his lungs, makes him shudder. He closes his eyes against the rotating guilt, the grief he’s created for them both. 

There’s so much he wants—needs—to tell her and he doesn’t know where or how to start. She’s stiff beneath his hand, waiting, he knows, for a dismissal. An excuse. A trite line or a lie. 

He wants to ask her what she wants. What she needs. But he thinks, staring at the bruise he could so easily heal, that it isn’t good enough. Puts too much onus on her, to pretend the hurt never happened. That it’s easily fixed. 

Swallowing down his nausea, his fear, he slides his hand over her skin to her arm, cradles her bicep gently, fingers whispering in Gallifreyan. 

I’m sorry, he says. 

River shudders, sighs, and moves to turn, away or toward he isn’t sure, but he doesn’t want her forgiveness, not yet. 

Bending forward, he places a soft kiss to the bruise on her shoulder. 

“Just you,” he whispers, and gathers his courage. 

River doesn’t move, for a long moment, his lips pressed to her skin, his fingers drawing symbols on her arm for want and need and hope. 

When she turns, finally, her eyes are bright with tears, and he lets his hand fall to hers, lifts her wrist to his lips and kisses that, too, the scar he’s never forgotten. 

River stares at him, her eyes blown and he waits, brushes his thumb over the pulse in her wrist. 

“Always you.”

River blinks and a tear falls and he catches it, cradles her cheek, relieved beyond all measure when she tilts into his touch. 

“Sweetie—”

He kisses her quiet, so softly, and tastes salt.

[optimistic-dinosaur-nacho]

Outnumbered

Chris Evans x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Language, Dog Birth, Blood, Morning Dog Sickness Summary: You know what it is when my fic involves with puppy gifs. You have a dog who is Dodger’s best friend that turned into his mate. That’s right, you and your husband Chris found out that your dog is giving birth to a load of puppies and you don’t know what to do with them. You two have become outnumbered.

~~~

“Dakota!” You call for your mix-breed husky, who was outside with Dodger. You see him pounces on her, trying to signal her as to he wanted to play with her. She barks and pounces on him, the two began to chase each other through the backyard in Los Angeles.

You wanted to take them out before you and Chris go out grocery shopping along with grabbing dinner. 

They seem to be playing than the bathroom. “Come on, sweet girl!” You call. Dakota snorts and dodges Dodger’s attack and rushes over to you. She squeeze through the sliding door and Dodger follows behind, huffing.

You slid the door close and followed them into the living room. Chris was grabbing his keys as he turned to the dogs, “Hey, buddy.” Chris kneels down and cups Dakota’s face. “Hey, Kota,” He says.

You smile at them and grabbed your phone, “Ready?” You asked. Chris stands up and nods, gripping his keys in hand, “Yeah,” He leans down to place a kiss on your lips before turning away to the door.

You gave one last glance towards the dogs and you both walked out. “You sure they’ll be okay?” You asked. Your dog was always a trouble maker with Dodger, when you and Chris had gotten Dakota, she was very hyper. She loved chewing your shoes and always propped herself on the counter, eating whatever she could.

It’s worse when she’s with Dodger. You from the start had to keep her in another room with toys and food.

Now, she was doing well, less chewing and being less of a hyper dog. Dodger would play with her, you two were happy to see him happy with another dog. They became best friends.

So, you got into Chris’s car and you drove to the store.

.

Just like a normal day, you gotten dog food, bathing supplies and a few goods from almost every aisle. Chris was grabbing beer for himself with a movie. He lifted it up to you with a grin, “Look what I found.”

You turn to see the movie in his hand, you grin, “You wanna watch Central Intelligence?” You asked. Chris nods, “Yeah, I heard it was a good movie. Besides we already have The Winter Soldier, that was my second choosing.” You shake your head and turned away, “Come on, put it in the cart.” Chris placed his things in the cart.

You paid for the things and headed out to his car. Chris helped you putting the groceries in the back. Giving you a quick kiss on your head, he closes the back of his car and you both headed to the front, sitting in your seats.

You were gone for about 30 minutes. You and Chris were driving back home. Dinner was brought back home and Chris carried the groceries while you handled the food.

You hear Dakota and Dodger bark at the door.

“We’re back, babies!” You say, walking in to see Dodger spinning in circles. Dakota had her tail wag very low usually if you’re scolding her. But she was happy. Her tail just seemed off. Dakota didn’t do anything bad during your absence which was good.

“All right, I’ll put the stuff away and you set the movie up,” He says, you hum as he kisses you again and walks over to the kitchen.

That night, it ended very well. 

.

Two weeks had passed and you were walking over to the kitchen. You noticed Dakota was following you very close. She peered up at you with love, she licks your bare calf as you reached for a coffee mug. “You love mama, do you?” You asked, she hears Dodger come by and he happily trots his way over to you and Dakota.

You look down to see Dakota lift up her flews and let out a low growl. Dodger’s tail lowers. “Kodabear, no,” You lower your hand under her chin and lifted it up, soothing her. “It’s okay, it’s just Dodger.”

Dakota looks back at Dodger and he slowly approaches her again. She gently licks his neck and turns away. You were somewhat confused and concern on what was going on with Dakota.

She wouldn’t growl at Dodger.

.

A week later, you were beginning to feed the dog’s. Pulling up their bowls to the counter, you filled it up with water and the other with dog food. About a cup and a half, you look over to see Dodger and Dakota peer up at you with delight. “You hungry?” You asked them.

Dodger barks lowly and spun. You placed the bowls on the ground and Dodger went straight in. Dakota on the other hand didn’t. She looked at her water bowl and licked it once, going over to the dog food, she sniffs it and looks up to you again.

“That’s all you’re getting,” You say, she uses her nose and nudges the bowl, tipping it over and spilling the food across the ground. “Dakota!” You softly scold, kneeling down to pick up the food.

She sniffed the food again and sat down. You groan, “What’s going on with you? I thought you loved this food? You want wet food?” You asked. And that’s what you did. You gave her wet food. Looking down at the can, Dakota sniffed it. You were leaning on the counter, waiting for her to eat.

Chris comes in, looking at you who was impatient. “What’s up?” He asked, he looked down to Dakota. “What? Is she not eating?” He asked. You sighed softly, watching your dog nudge the bowl once and gaze up at you.

“She didn’t want the dry food and she’s being a picky little dog.” Chris looks up to you with a blank expression, it confused you. “What?” You asked. Chris stared at you for a couple of seconds and finally shook his head, “Nothing.” He then left you in the kitchen with Dakota.

You didn’t have your coffee that morning now.

.

Week four, Dakota finally relieved you when she went back to eating. It was kind of odd how she was acting these weeks. She stood by you the whole day and night. She would growl or be less active around the house. 

Her growling would be towards Dodger and seconds later she’s loving him. On the couch, she growls when Chris pets her. Something was very off about your dog.

You and Chris thought she was having organ failures or something. It worried the hell out of you two. Chris finally chose the day to take her to the vet. Chris had her on a leash and took her up to the vet. You followed behind, nervously thinking how you would live without Dakota. 

She was a very good dog and you only had her for 2 years. Holding her close, you and Chris checked up at the desk and waited for a few minutes. You look down to Dakota and gently pet her. Chris then did it and she accepted it for a bit.

A nice woman walks out with a smile, “Dakota Evans?” She asked. You and Chris give her smiles and stood up, following her to one of the rooms. “I heard that Dakota was acting strange around the house, is that correct?”

Chris nods, “Yeah, we have another dog at home and she’s really good with him but nowadays she’s like growling or... growling at me. But with her, she’s fine,” Chris says, gesturing to you.

The woman nods, “She’s also a picky eater? What do you give her?”

Chris shrugs, “Regular dog food, she did have wet food but she just always tip the bowl over and stare.” The woman nods and writes things down. “How long has this been going on?”

You and Chris look at each other. “About 3, 4 weeks?” You said. She nods in response. “Okay, I want to check her real quick, run a few tests and I’ll be back to you guys in a few minutes. You wait here and I can take her with me.” Chris nods and hands her the leash.

The woman spoke softly to Dakota as she followed him. You and Chris sat in the smaller room. Few minutes in that room, Chris was staring at the dog and cat posters. He noticed your hands fidget with each other and he slips his hand between them, holding them. “It’s gonna be okay. She’s gonna be okay,” He reassures.

I shake my head, “I just don’t want to lose her.” Chris brings your hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss to them. The door clicks and Dakota was the first to come in, rushing up to you. You and Chris coo at her. The woman smiles in a good way, holding the clipboard in hand.

You look up to her, “So?” You ask.

“Congratulations. Dakota’s pregnant.” Your face drops along with Chris, his smile is completely gone. “What?” You and Chris say in unison. The woman grins, “I’m guessing this was unplanned?”

You laugh in disbelief, “I thought Dodger was fixed, I-” You pause and glare at Chris. He tilts his head, giving you the ‘why you staring at me’ look. He smiles sheepishly, “Sorry?” He asked.

You hit him but not hard. “I thought you said he was fixed?”

“You can’t tell that he has his balls?” Chris turns to the doctor, “Sorry.” The woman chuckles. Chris takes your hands, “I’m sorry, I thought you knew. Why isn’t Dakota neutered?” He asked.

“Because I didn’t plan on it!” You said, rubbing your temples once you pulled them out of his hands. “Oh, my god...” You groan. You couldn’t handle another 7 puppies in the house. What was worse is that Chris loved puppies and he’s gonna want all of them in one house!

You shook your head, “Sorry, Dr. Lindsey, this is just big news to us and I don’t know what to do with these puppies.” The woman grins, “Well, there’s always people who would love to adopt one. We even do adoptions here. Give us a call if there are any problems. But I do have some things to say that is for Dakota.”

.

Onto week six and you were starting to give Dakota less food just like Dr. Lindsey had said. Dakota was at the foot of the bed, you and Chris were sleeping till a rough noise woke you up.

Oh no. “No, Dakota!” You jolt up from the bed causing Chris to as well, “What!” He says. You see Dakota gag and she began to throw up the contents in her stomach. “Oh no...” You moan, covering your face. Chris looks over, “Oh, gosh, she’s throwing up now?”

You rubbed your face and stood up. Cleaning the mess up and disposing it. Dakota seemed fine after it and she laid back down. You joined Chris back in bed and he pulled you into his chest. “I’m sorry,” He says.

You sigh, “It’s okay. It was bound to happen. I don’t know what to do with the puppies.”

“We’re keeping them-”

“Christopher Robert Evans, no we are not. We’re gonna be outnumbered.” Chris chuckles into your hair, “Once you see those puppies, you’ll want to keep them.” You roll your eyes at him.

You would never.

.

“I felt it again!” Chris says. You sighed softly as you set up the whelping box. Week Seven and Chris is feeling Dakota’s belly. Two more weeks, Dakota was about to give birth to seven pups and you weren’t ready.

Chris was more into feeling Dakota’s stomach for the past hour. Their kicks pushing in Dakota’s stomach. Chris announced Dakota’s pregnancy not too long ago when Dakota’s stomach began to swell. People freaked out and were trying to find out if you were keeping them.

Chris didn’t want to set them up for adoption. Imagine what people would be, taking a pup that was made by Chris and Y/N Evans dogs. Weird feeling in your gut. You knew your mother had wanted a dog in your hometown.

Maybe you wanted to give one to one of the cast. The ones with little kids would love to have puppies. But Chris didn’t want to give them away. That means more dogs, more food and more trouble.

You tried talking to him about the pups when they come. You hear Chris talk to Dodger.

“You’re gonna be a dad, buddy. You’re actually the first man in the family to be one. Such a lucky dude.” You grin as you finished setting up the box. “Okay, bring her over.” For the next weeks, you’ll have her separated from the father which Dodger did not like. He hated the separation.

You set her up in your bedroom, somewhere where she could be close to you guys.

Chris gently guided the sweet girl into the box and she immediately laid down in the bed. You close the gate and sighed. Chris’s arm comes around to pull you into his side as you both look at her. Dodger began to whine, peaking over the box.

“I know, bud. She’s gonna be in there till she has your puppies,” Chris says, Dodger looks up in sadness, whimpering. You pout and placed your hand on Chris’s chest, rubbing softly. 

“Just two more weeks,” You said, Chris looks down at you and grins. “I love you.” You look up to him and you grinned at him, “I love you, too.” He lowers his head to place a kiss on your lips. You, for a second, pulled away and kissed him harder than he did.

He took that as some sign and he held you close.

That day, you left Dodger in the bedroom with Dakota while you took the couch.

.

Your eighth week was normal as the rest, fed Dakota some food but she mostly laid on her side. You knew she would be uncomfortable through the last week. Chris was getting excited, he updated his family every day. He checked up on Dr. Lindsey, saying we were doing good.

You were feeling her belly, feeling the small kicks that happened every second. You laughed at her reactions. Her legs kicked and her eyes wide, knowing something was growing inside of her.

You were ready.

Dakota wasn’t.

But you had confidence in her. You spoken to her on how she’d be the best mother these pups would have, along with Dodger. You scolded her jokingly, saying she allowed her lady parts to a best friend. Saying they were friends with benefits.

Dakota wagged her tail as you rubbed her belly, gently. She gave you lazy kisses as well. She now knew she was ready.

.

“SHIT!!” You screamed, pacing around the house, Chris was laughing while Dodger was barking at the loud thuds. Dakota was anxiously pacing around, licking and scratching up her bed. Chris had set up blankets in the box with her, it was big enough for him to fit with her. “Y/N, calm down,” Chris says.

“What are we gonna do? How are we gonna take care of them? How many boys? How many girls? Oh, my gosh! Dodger, you could’ve just kept your private to yourself!” You shout, Chris shakes his head with a grin as he sees Dakota pace around.

“I know, I know, sweet girl. It’s gonna happen. She was heavy breathing, it had been going on for a few hours. Chris watched Dakota carefully. She then jolts up and Chris jumps, “Oh.”

“What?”

Chris lowers his head to look at her, “Her water broke.”

“AH!” You shout. Chris gently tells Dakota to lay down as she paces around, whining. Dodger was whining as well. You came over and saw Dakota on her back. “That’s a sign that she’s on the urge, Chris,” You said. Dakota curls up in her bed and you see her began to push.

“Oh, gosh, it’s happening!” You look away as Chris scoots over, gently petting her. “Good, girl,” He says. You turn back and gotten serious. “Okay, okay...” You slipped on rubber gloves and joined in the box.

You and Chris both encouraging her. You gasp, “There’s a head!” Chris reaches over and grabs a small towel. “She’ll clean the pup on her own, let her do her own thing and we’ll dry the puppy fully off.”

You nod, “One big push, Dakota.” Dakota’s leg lifts up and the puppy comes out. She immediately began to clean the puppy. “Good girl!” You and Chris say. Dodger barks.

After you cut the umbilical cord, you took the puppy in the towel and began to dry it off. “Look at its fur, it’s gorgeous.” The puppies back was a spinal trail of dark fur, the rest was white and tan color similar to Dodgers fur. 

Chris lifts up her tail, “It might take another six hours so we just have to stay for a bit.” You nod gently rubbing the puppy before looking at it. “It’s a boy,” You say, showing it to Dakota. “Look it, it’s your baby.”

She gently licks it and you placed it in a blanket that was bowl like, having them there for Dakota to see. It began to squeal and you pout, “Oh... baby...” Chris smiles and waited for the next puppy to arrive.

.

Six.

Six hours of waiting and retrieving puppies. Dakota had six puppies. Their furs were unique. Some had light fur, brown, white and tan. One looked like Dodger and another looked like Dakota. 3 girls and 3 boys. You hadn’t found out names. 

It was too much to start getting attached to them by naming them and have them leave with a different one. 

Chris named them anyway. He also bought these color velcro collars that are used for puppies. He sort them by color. “Are you gonna tell me their names?” You asked.

Chris laughs, “Well, the blue one, is Steve. The red one is Tony-”

“You did not just name them after your co-stars.” Chris laughs, “Hold on, hold on! The grey one is Thor. The pink one is Rose, the purple one is Natasha and the yellow one is Chloe.”

You laugh, “You need to work on your names.” Chris smiles, “What, took me this whole birth to plan the names!” He says. You smiled as you watched all six puppies suck on Dakota like vampires. Them squirming place as they whine. 

Dodger brought your guys attention.

“Oh, Dodge, you’re not supposed to see them for another 4 weeks,” Chris says. Dodger barks. Chris nods, “I know it’s not fair, buddy. You’ll see them.” You turn to Chris and grinned, laying your head on his shoulder. His arm comes around and pulls you to his side.

“This was a tough day,” Chris says, you nod, “I’m not letting your dog knock up my dog ever again.” Chris laughs and rubs your shoulder. “This would be a family I wouldn’t mind having... as long as I have you and the dogs. I’m living a dream.”

You pause for a moment before accepting it with a grin.

.

4 weeks later, your puppies are walking. Oh man. It was the day, Dodger was able to meet his puppies for the first time. You on the other hand had other plans for the day. But you stood in the box with Dakota as Chris held Dodger back. “Okay, you be nice to them, bud. They’re still babies, treat them as your babies. K, bud?” 

Dodger whines in response and Chris opens the gate for Dodger to come in. The puppies surrounded you and they look over to Dodger. Their father began to sniff them carefully, the puppies already started pouncing towards him. Chris dies in cuteness. 

Some of the pups are yipping as usual, Dodger does his little play position and the puppies throw their paws at his legs and face. Dodger playfully opens his mouth, being gentle around them.

Your heart warmed at the sight. “He loves them.” Chris laughs, “They do. So does he.” Giving Dodger a few more minutes with them, he gave Dakota a small lick on her head before leaving.

You stood outside the box and grinned, “I have something for you and the pups,” You said. Chris furrows his brows, “What? Outfits?”

“Yeah,” You said. Chris walks over to where you pointed and he digs in the bag. “When did you go out?” He asked. You peered up at him with a small grin. “When I got the signs,” Was all you said.

The shuffling from the bag stops and Chris looks over to you in shock. “No way.” You grin at him, hands behind your back. Chris pulls out the outfit and shows it to you.

It was a custom outfit you made.

Captain’s Little Soldier.

He looks up to you again, “We’re pregnant?” You nod. Chris shakes his head, “Not Dakota, us?” He asks. You laugh, “Yes! Come here!” He grips the outfit in his hand and rushes over to pull you in a tight hug.

His face in your neck as he shakes his head, “I can’t believe this.” He pulls away and you reach up to swipe the tears away from his cheeks. “Don’t cry, you gonna make me cry,” You said.

Chris chuckles, “I’m sorry. I just wanted this.” You nod, reaching to stroke the side of his head. “I know and now you got it.” You hear him sniffle and you pouted at him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” He says. He pulled you back in the hug, lifting you up in his arms. You laugh lightly in his neck. “So what about the puppies?”

“We’re keeping them-”

“How many times do I have to-?” You sighed, rubbing his shoulders. You couldn’t deny their amount of cuteness and have them leave this house. You shook your head.

“Okay, fine. We’ll keep them.”

~~~

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