#ouchie!

[itsriotmotherfuckers]

James believed in monsters in his closet.

Peter believed in monsters under his bed.

Remus believed in monsters breaking his bedroom window.

Sirius believed in monsters sleeping in the bedroom a few floors above his.

[whumpologyy]

One day Caretaker notices some kind of rash on Whumpee’s skin, almost as if it’s been rubbed raw.

“What happened here?”

“Just….just trying to get clean.”

“Whumpee…” Caretaker tries to meet Whumpee’s downturned gaze. “It’s been weeks. You are clean.”

[bloedgetuige]

need to stop carrying stress in my shoulders . post haste

[gaytobymeres]

Getting your period when you’re on holiday should not be allowed!!!!

[carnavoyeur]

my lower back: in pain for the last week

me: yeah man, tickets for more concerts, this is the greatest decision ever

[llycaons]

there's a lot of really great moby dick covers but the audiobook one is such a letdown...it's got a little figure stabbing him and he's actually bleeding. I don't want to see that...

[askthebadlydrawnkinito]

can i bite you?(in fredbear way)

What?..

ACK-

haha do any of you perhaps have bandages?

[awynter]

which tragic death would you suffer?

the prophetic hero

you die saving the world, as you were always supposed to. peace comes only with your blood. the world will remember you for centuries. they will write poems, create art, and film movies all about you. no one will remember what you were before your death. maybe you don't even know it either. you have spent so long saving the world time after time that there is nothing left of you except the heroism. you die never knowing love.

[jerrydevine]

don't feel so good

^ im george the world is jerry and elaine

[stumbleonhometomycats]

thinking about the most devastating mashup taylor could do with invisible string....

[the0retically]

As much as I love bowling, and believe me I love bowling, my wrist and knees do not at all

[fatherforgivemeforihavesinned]

it wld be helpful if ppl treated not drinking water as much as a red flag as not eating bc like how have i only seen you drink water once (1)??????

[widowshill]

scraped my finger big time at strike everyone send me love letters and kiss it better.

[cleaduvalls]

i have a crack on my lip. if someone wants to kiss it better

[bugtastic-bug]

bops you on the head gently with a feather duster

yeouchie! my poor head! :[

[hearty-an0n]

when you poke yourself in the eye and the fuckin mind helicopter comes to get ur ass