#over seriously the stupidest shit for real

[sissybabycucksophia]

The Adult Baby Adoption Part 5

(This story is complete fiction and although i may desperately wish it isn’t, there is no fact or real world experience behind this story, and themes reflected in the story may be triggering, these themes are not my actual beliefs and are only part of a fantasy kink scenario. Also non of the images belong to me)

After lying there disgusted, ashamed and thoroughly emasculated by Cynthia and Daddy’s wild night of passion I begun to ask myself questions like “is this seriously my life now” and “will I ever feel my dick inside a woman again” a familiar and horrifying feeling began to build in my stomach. Suddenly pain and intense cramps began surging from my gut, and pressure begun building in my bowels I knew exactly what this feeling was! “NO NO NO NO NO!!! I Wont shit myself lying here like this NO I won’t do it, I dont know how but I have to get these layers off! I wont lie here and shit myself like a helpless baby!!” I thought angrily.

Suddenly I begun to violently kick my legs, bouncing my head and torso up and to get the heavy pink duvet off of me. With each bounce of my head the humiliating and irritating feeling of my wigs low ponytails slapping around. Eventually and while clenching my butt hole as tight as I could, the duvet was mostly off my body. Next came a manoeuvre which felt like super spy precision but im sure in fact was more pathetic looking than anyone could dream. While my stomach angrily gurgled I would both sit up and attempt to swivel on my heavily padded ass, swinging the legs of the sleep sack toward the edge of the bed, despite being in the middle of the massive super king size pink 4 poster bed I would use my heels and bend my knees to drag my ass to the edge of the bed.

Next came the stupidest decision I could possibly have made. I mean even if I could somehow stand up with crawl booties on… how was I removing the restraining belt keeping my arms from being useful? The timer lock set for god knows how long? The tied on mittens under the sleepsack mittens? Not to mention getting the diapers off without daddy stopping me?…. All rational questions that a grown man desperate to not shit himself while dressed in a demoralising manner such as this was willing to completely ignore in the pursuit of freedom. And so I would scooch my bum and jump off the bed onto my sleepsack and crawl bootie trapped feet. For a moment… only a mere moment mind you, I managed to stand on my tippy toes like a ballerina and even turned to face the bottom of the bed toward the door. However moments do, this one passed quickly, feeling pain in my toes I would Lose my balance.

Falling forward and with no ability to put my arms out to brace myself I would fall hitting my forehead off the hard wooden bedframe, sharp pain rushed to my forehead as I landed face down next too the bed. Rolling onto my back away from the bed I fell blood running down my forehead and instantly tears filled my eyes again…. In that moment of weakness my ass would relax and into my diapers would explode a warm, gloopy and fowl smelling shit! Feeling it spread itself across my ass and between my legs too my crotch toward my cage I admitted defeat… abandoning any sense of reason or control I began to scream and whale for my Daddy like a baby. Genuine fear and upset ripped through me as I wondered whether my crys would be heeded or whether leaving me on the floor like this was simply to be another step in my demoralisation.

However to my surprise the door would unlock and I would be blinded as someone entered and turned on the ceiling light which I was now staring at. Hurrying over to me, Daddy and Cynthia crouched at either side of me, opening my tear filled eyes my breath trembled and I sniffled as I looked into daddy’s face expecting Anger. To my surprise I was met with genuine concern on his face, sliding an hand under my head he guided my head onto his lap and gently stroked the top of the bonnet that was pathetically tied on my head. “Cynthia, go grab the first aid kit please, Jade needs that head wound tidied up!” Daddy said authoritatively as I watched a total naked Cynthia nod and walk out of the room, it was in that moment that my cage tightened trying to smother the erection of seeing such a stunning woman naked that I realised…. Slowly shifting my focus back to daddy I once again was mortified as there right next to my head lay daddy’s large flaccid cock.

BeforeI could even begin to pull away or struggle daddy began to speak softly too me, “Im so sorry princess, this is all daddy’s fault…”. ‘Finally! Now you see all these layers and restraints were overkill! Good now can you get me out of them!’ I thought as daddy took pause. Continuing softly he added “its all my fault for pushing you to be too independent and too free to move around so early. You’re still just a diaper dependent little girl and to allow you such movement around that bed was stupid of me! I knew I should have had you tightly and safely secured to the bed with those bed restraints Reverend Imelda recommended.” My eyes widened in disbelief, ‘TOO MUCH FREEDOM!!! Seriously!!! The only pieces of skin not completely covered by about six layers is my face!!” I thought in a mix of outrage and fear. But at that the birthday suit Cynthia returned, crouching down next to me she retrieved wipes and a small bottle from the first aid kit. “Lucky for Sissy Jade, I’m a Paediatrician. But thats too big a word for such a little girl, it means I’m a childrens doctor. So I can reassure daddy here that this is just a superficial cosmetic wound, once cleaned up I’ll pinch it back together and seal it with medical superglue!” Cynthia explained as her voluptuous breasts jiggled in my face. Proceeded to do as she said, a piece of me found myself kind of gutted at not needing to go to hospital, maybe there I could have convinced someone to help me. As Cynthia finished dealing with my head, Daddy would evilly press his hand on my crotch and squish, pushing the now cold gloopy shit around my groin. The feeling made me want to rip everything off just to get that horrible feeling off my skin, “nope, seems like the laxatives and diuretics i put in your dinner havent quite fully emptied your bowels in here… no changes till the morning then.” Daddy cooed ‘Laxatives!! Diuretics!!?? You bastard!!!’ I thought as Cynthia packed up the first aid cut, but not before humiliating me by showing me the bow shaped, Disney’s Minnie mouse inspired band aid 🩹 which she stuck over my now sealed wound.

At that to my surprise Daddy would Hoist me up into his arms as he stood up. Once again held in a princess carry I asked through the pacifier as best I could “hare Aaaa oooo Aaachhing eee oww?” To which Daddy responded, “for tonight, since your bed clearly is not safe, You’ll sleep in bed with mommy and daddy tonight!” To which my cage once again smothered a humiliation induced erection. Why!? Why was he doing this! Surely he wanted to torture me! As I was carried into daddy’s bedroom I was in awe of its sleek black and gunpowder grey modern aesthetic, so masculine and confident in its design. A complete and total contrast to what was now to be considered my room. Carrying me over to the massive super king size bed Daddy would place me down smack in the middle of the bed, he and Cynthia would then laugh and flirt with each other before Cynthia lay down to my left. Pressing her body against my sleepsack imprisoned for and her breast right next to my head I begun to wonder whether I’d been deliberately positioned lower in the bed than Cynthia. At that Daddy entered the ensuite bathroom and I heard the shower start up, and with that Cynthia’s hand would begin to gently caress my cheek, “did you try to escape and do that to your head because hearing real adults have sex made you feel pathetic and inadequate? Thats hilarious! Im gonna be honest with you sissy… I’m gonna try convince your daddy that from now on you should be in a crib in the room when we’re having sex since you are clearly too young and ill behaved to be left alone~” in a moment of frustration and humiliation I forgot about my restraints and attempted to swat her hand away from my face however all I could manage was a small jarring motion which simply made Cynthia stop and go silent for a moment before bursting into laughter.

After the shower sound stopped I would hear a phone ringing and daddy answering it in the bathroom, unfortunately through the wig, the bonnet and being smooshed into Cynthia I was unable to clearly make out the conversation. When daddy re-entered he would lay down naked but at least clean, on the opposite side from me than Cynthia. Rolling toward me to look over my head at Cynthia I was disgusted feeling his huge cock slap against my the thigh region of my sleepsack. Mortified by all that was happening I watched daddy and Cynthia talk. “Looks like my little jadey bear has a playdate tomorrow, that boy from the church apparently! How exciting!! My beautiful little girl attracting boys already” Daddy said to Cynthia as she simply giggled and laughed. As daddy spoke I was unable to stop from peeing into my shit piss and cum filled diaper, ‘boy? Oh god? Who does he mean? That disgusting pervert that hump me to orgasm in his diapers? Or the beautiful woman forced to be a baby boy?!!’ I thought.

At that daddy would kiss my forehead before rolling me over onto my side so my face was nuzzled in his chest and I felt his huge cock press against my crotch, Cynthia then shuffled in tight to my back pressing her huge breasts against the back of my neck so that they could lie foreheads touching. Never in my life had I felt so unbelievably humiliated, emasculated and weak… and yet so desperate to orgasm as much cock ached in its cage. Eventually as the lights turned off I was helpless but to simply fall asleep cradled between my new caregivers…. Dreaming of what hell awaited me on my playdate.

[astro09-13]

Proxy Interactions Headcanons [Lengthy]

Is it still a "headcanon" if it's part of my rewrite/AU? These are 'canon' within my personal CRP world! [!] NO RELATION TO CANONICAL CHARACTERS/SLENDERVERSE/CRP CHLOE KLEIN & OTHER PROXIES INTERACTIONS. Tim/Masky: - They don't tend to get along because of Tim's attitude and behaviour towards Toby. - Constantly hits on her in front of Toby, making crude and perverted jokes and teasing Toby's "lack of experience." [Let it be clear that he has absolutely no real attraction to her, this is entirely to make Toby uncomfortable.] - She is his antithesis once Toby is involved. Any remarks he makes are quickly shut down by her own sarcastic comments. - When Toby isn't involved, they respect each other's roles. Tim frequently attempts to get Chloe to make his crazy weapon ideas and constantly asks to borrow her IROC. She usually says no: "Let me take the car for this one." "Your lil' silver Corolla looks fine to me." "If you think that shit's fine, you don't know as much about cars as I thought." "You got IROC money?" "..." "Right. Bye, Toyota." "Fuck you." Sometimes she humours him and lets him take the car, but only when it's for completing a task for her, like picking up supplies. - Once in a blue moon they'll have a smoke break together, usually in silence. Brian/Hoodie: - They don't interact that much, however, he finds her bickering with Tim humorous. Sometimes he eggs them on so he can get a laugh. - He's weaponized incompetence personified. Eventually, she just hands off all the tasks to Tim. - He likes to ask her the stupidest questions because she'll always take them seriously and answer thoughtfully: "Why don't humans evolve to have more arms? Think of all the shit you can do with more arms." [Insert lengthy back & forth about evolution and what stupid evolutions would be cool or useful.] Or... "Can you make a gun that shoots knives out or something like that?" [Cue the pair drawing ridiculous schematics and arguing about the logistics of ballistic knives.] Toby: - They went to high school together, so, they already had plenty of history. The entirety of their platonic relationship occurred during high school. - They're together, as in 'dating.' [I hesitate to use that word. As close to dating as you can get while being a proxy, I suppose.] Neither gets very touchy and they don't indulge in PDA. Toby isn't asexual per se, but his desire for sexual intimacy is incredibly low. He prefers quality time and words of affirmation. Chloe is indifferent when it comes to sexual relations and is more than happy to reciprocate whatever Toby needs or wants. - Toby is generally quiet when the others are around, but once alone, they'll chat about anything and everything with each other. - They care deeply about each other and will check on each other after missions. Chloe doesn't do direct killing or 'dangerous' tasks as The Operator finds her technical skills too valuable to risk her wellbeing, so it's mostly her making sure Toby isn't gravely injured. - Due to his CIPA, he relies on Chloe to scan him over and patch up whatever may need it. These moments are very emotionally intimate for Toby. He often gets flashbacks to their time in high school when she would patch him up after his father's outbursts: "Doesn't this feel familiar? Can't tell if I hate it or if I want more." "Well, if it's any comfort, I usually seem to wonder the same thing." "Tsk. You're a comfort in general."

[conspicuous-clown-car]

what a morning,,,

here's a rant about the pressure community

I've been kinda lurking on pressure twitter for the past few weeks while all this shit went down and i just gotta say... jesus fuck.

I practically had a heart attack as soon as i opened my phone when i woke up and saw zeal was trying to sell pressure. Considering how he changed his profile last night to a strictly corporate one and then this? It seemed like a really hasty decision, and something serious was going on with him.

And yknow what, with all the hate being directed at him right now i don't blame him one fucking bit. I'd probably end up doing the same thing if i was in his shoes. Being autistic as well, i would just want to completely distance myself from this overwhelming bullshit. I think that's why he started to distance himself from the community in the first place (which unfortunately is kinda what led to some issues getting overlooked).

The tweet was deleted and pressure isn't for sale anymore thank GOD, but I'm honestly more worried about the actual people behind pressure than the game itself.

I agree that there's issues they need to fix, but its not an entirely black and white situation, and its pretty fucking complicated. With the sheer amount of people in the community its crazy to expect them to handle and manage everything themself, especially since they blew up in popularity in such a short amount of time, how the hell would they know how to deal with this???

Yes, there are certain things they need to actually address and take responsibility for that they sort of haven't, but attacking them to where it gets to this point isn't the fucking answer.

I wouldn't blame any of the devs if they never touch the game again, the way the community has treated them and has completely blown things out of proportion is insane. I feel like the main issue is the discord server itself but that's just me. From what I've seen its mostly just the community self cannibalizing, attacking each other, sending death threats, and doxxing people over shit that literally doesn't matter at all.

I'm not one to really delve into fandom drama, but this whole issue with certain possessive Sebastian fans and those who took it upon themselves to attack those fans is the stupidest fucking conflict I've ever seen in any fandom. Especially when this stuff reaches the people who work on the games who have nothing to do with it.

I agree that this is something the devs need to talk about head on with full transparency, no matter their feelings on it, because a main problem I've seen with them is lack of community management.

But again, y'all are forgetting the devs are REAL FUCKING PEOPLE, people who are bound to make mistakes, and get overwhelmed, and not know how to deal with suddenly having a giant fanbase. Harassing them and sending death threats is going way too fucking far and wont solve anything, because clearly all its done is made things worse.

Also god forbid they have boundaries and don't want to see certain things in the discord server. I'm not gonna get into the specifics, but as a queer trans person I think some of y'all are reading too much into the things they don't allow, seriously.

Reminder, I'm saying all this as someone who self-ships with Sebastian, and who's not entirely thrilled about him being canonically married. BUT PRIORITIZING A FICTIONAL CHARACTER OVER REAL PEOPLE????? THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YALL???

And to the people I've seen disappointed in zeal's response to all this on twitter, I'm with you, not seeing whats happening in the community doesn't mean these problems don't exist. But think about the shit he's going through, put yourself in his shoes and genuinely try to understand how fucking overwhelming this whole situation is, for him and the rest of the team. Especially after what's happened in the past 24 hours.

Tangent, but am i the only one who's seen a drastic change in the way fandom communities operate in the past few years? Like after lockdown fandom spaces have gotten more and more hostile, and people are just being so fucking mean to each other over the most trivial shit??? Listen I Get being chronically online, because i am, but at a certain point you just gotta log the fuck off and touch some grass, man. christ.

I really hope the devs take a break, they need it. I was excited about the update that was supposed to come out this month but I don't think it will now, and I honestly don't think we deserve it.

TL;DR: Pressure fandom, do better. Speaking from both points of view, no matter the various mistakes the dev team has made, the majority of this is on y'all.

And lastly, I'd honestly rather keep pressure exactly the way it is with no updates and no new stuff ever again than for it to turn into roblox slop like most of the games that are sold off on that platform.

[manygeese]

@lost-trio-week Lost Trio Week Day 1: Nicknames

Before we get into this, let’s get this straight: teens who are friends, in my experience, come up with the stupidest nicknames for each other. A friend of mine calls me, a girl whose real name is rather feminine, Steve. Also taken to calling me Crazy Steve lately. There’s also Luigi, nerd alert, etc. etc. I have many a nickname and a grand total of zero make sense. Okay, on with the fic!

~*~

“Okay, you are not supposed to serve it that hard,” Leo huffed after an embarrassing attempt to hit the volleyball that was flying way too high over his head.

It was a late summer afternoon, and Piper had insisted that Leo and Jason go with her to the park and help her practice for volleyball tryouts. Unfortunately, Jason had broken his ankle falling out of a tree (thank you, vengeful venti, that was a great surprise) and Leo was in no way a volleyball champ. Piper found herself surprisingly frustrated. If she didn’t get on the team, she was going to freak the fuck out. Literally all of the cute girls, cough cough Reyna Ramírez-Arellano cough cough, were on the team and she would be seriously missing out.

“Sorry that you’re too much of a shorty to get the fucking ball, dude,” Piper retorted, sticking out her tongue and giving him a raspberry. “Seriously, you need to actually go for it, bro. Get some air next time.”

“You turn into a different person whenever we play volleyball. Like you’re a frat boy. It’s all ‘get the fucking ball, dude’ or ‘go for it, bro’.”

Piper huffed as she carried the ball back to the green space where they were playing. “Shut up.”

“You become Chad whenever we play volleyball.”

“I do not ‘become Chad’ whenever we play volleyball!”

“Yes, you do.”

“Jason, tell him that I don’t become Chad whenever we play volleyball,” Piper whined, looking over to where Jason was situated in a neon green Adirondack chair.

“Leo, Piper doesn’t become Chad whenever you play volleyball,” he echoed absentmindedly, not looking up from his book. His head shot up like a pointing Spaniel when he realized what he’d said. “Wait, what? Become Chad?”

“Let me show you!” Leo clapped his eager hands together in quick succession. “C’mon, Piper, serve me the ball.”

She sighed and shot the ball over to him. He moved to the side and hit it back. They volleyed the ball three more times before it sailed over Leo’s head, making it pretty much impossible for him to do anything but sigh and retrieve it. Wait, did it land in a tree? Amazing. Lovely. What an awesome day.

“Oh, come the fuck on, man! You totally could’ve gotten that shit!” Piper complained.

Jason looked towards her with growing fear. “You do become Chad whenever you play volleyball.”

Leo had an annoyingly satisfied grin on his annoyingly smug face. Piper could see it, even if he was ten feet up in a tree. “I told you, Chad,” he called, chucking the ball at her once he had gotten it.

She caught it with ease. “I would not be a Chad if I was a frat boy.” Piper, knowing that she had lost on one front, moved to another. “I would be… Michael.”

“Michael is not a frat boy. Michael is a nerd,” Leo insisted. He tumbled down a few branches. Piper grimaced in sympathy.

“Now, if you called him Mike,” Jason pointed out.

Piper made a face, like she was taking a big bite of the world’s sourest gummy bear and washing it down with spoiled milk. “Ew, nevermind, I wouldn’t be a Mike.”

“What about Ryan?” Jason offered.

“Never in this life or the next would I let myself be called Ryan. I would sooner implode.”

Jason shook his head. “See, now you’re acting like Michael.”

Leo shook the sticks and leaves out of his hair once he was back on solid ground and squinted at her scrutinizingly. “Ethan,” he decided.

“Oh my Gods, you are Ethan,” Jason agreed.

“Y’know what? I am an Ethan. I can accept that.”

“If I ever develop demigod safe phones, your name in mine is gonna be Ethan,” Leo concluded.

~*~

Months later, over Christmas break, Piper, Jason and the rest of the seven received rough drafts of what were supposed to be demigod safe phones. Leo had bragged and bragged about the job he and his siblings had managed to do, but Jason didn’t quite see the appeal.

“Leo, how do I work this thing?” Jason asked, staring intensely into the screen. “It’s so… small.”

“Are you wearing your glasses?” Piper asked from where she sat on the couch opposite him, already signing up for Instagram on her all new Hephaestus-Cabin made-phone. They were working on the names. So far Harley had suggested Hephonestus, but the only one to second it was Leo.

Jason searched for the frame of his glasses in his peripheral vision. “I am… not. I left them on my bedside table.”

“Okay, Grandma, you want me to get them for you?” Leo teased, ruffling the blond’s hair. “Have you taken your medication today? What about measuring your blood pressure?”

Jason sighed deeply. “I understand the elderly in a way I thought I never would. I am one of them.”

“I’ll tell Hazel and Nico you said that. I think they’re having an old movie marathon soon, you should join them,” Piper suggested. Her mouth tilted up on one side in a sly smirk. “You’ll love the Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies, Grandma. Say, didn’t you see those in the theater when they first came out?”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Eh, kids these days.”

Leo fell into a pit of giggles at Jason’s old woman accent. He had somehow managed to nail it.

“Back in my day, we didn’t have any fancy contraptions such as these-” he waved the phone around in the air, holding it by the corner like he was disgusted by it- “All we had were stock market crashes and crude oil.”

“Pfft,” Piper said. She snapped a sly picture of her friends and made a mental note to post it on her private account later. She would caption it “holidays with Grandma.” No, maybe “Jason discovering his inner old lady”? She’d have to workshop it.

Leo took a deep breath in a last attempt to escape the clutching grasp of laughter. “Okay, it’s official: I’m going to have a group chat with Ethan and Grandma. Two polar opposite beings.”

“No, you remember Ethan?” Piper griped. “This is not going to be good for me.”

Jason nodded solemnly. “Ethan and Grandma: an unstoppable duo.”

“Ethan and Grandma: yin and yang.” Leo pitched like it was a movie, the summer blockbuster.

Piper relented. “Ethan and Grandma: best of friends.”

~*~

Just about the worst thing about Summer was the heat. Everybody agreed on that front (except Leo, he insisted it was the crowds at camp).

Jason and Piper were sprawled out in the strawberry fields, claiming it was too hot to do any real work. Leo, being immune to the heat, just rolled his eyes and kept on picking the berries. He would laugh at them later when Chiron gave them dish washing duty for skirting their responsibilities, but he’d also probably go right down with them if Harley didn’t pitch too big a fit about his absence during the campfire.

Jason tugged on one of the north winds and brought it their way. He sighed as he felt the coolness wash over his face. “Strawberry me, Leo,” he ordered.

“You got it, boss.” He lined up his shot and tossed it towards Jason’s mouth. It would have landed on the grass next to him, but thanks to a little wind manipulation, it was right on target.

“Hey, I want one too!” Piper whined, opening her mouth with an “ahh.” It morphed into an “ow” when the strawberry clocked her square in the forehead. Jason snickered next to her, causing her to slap him lightly in the arm. “Superman? More like Loserman,” she mumbled.

Leo laughed. “Loserman. That’s a good one. We should add it to the list.”

“The list?” Jason asked incredulously. “What list?”

Piper nodded sagely. “We should. Add it to the list, that is.”

Jason sat up and wiped sweat from his brow. “Guys, I’m lost. What is the list?”

There was a list, tacked onto the corkboard in Leo’s room, of the best ways to avoid calling Jason his actual name. It was part of an ongoing experiment to trick new campers into thinking his name was actually Superman or Blondie. “Like Ponyboy from The Outsiders,” Leo had pointed out when his big sister Nyssa found out. She had given him a look and a confused laugh before leaving him and Piper to their own devices.

“You want another strawberry, Pipes?” Leo asked, already finding the best one to give her.

“You know it.” She opened her eyes this time, ready to course correct if need be. Need did indeed be, as the strawberry was headed for the ground above her head, but she shuffled up just in time to catch it in her mouth. It was the green part first, though, so she spat it out and started picking the leaves off.

“You guys are so nefarious,” Jason complained. “You’re always making up lists and you never tell me. There was the list about which horror movies scared me the most so you could torture me on the Halloween movie night. There was the one about what you were going to get me for my birthday, which, now that I say it out loud, makes sense. But my point still stands! If you were a Batman villain, you’d be called the Lister or something stupid like that.”

Piper guffawed. “The Lister is such a lame name. He’d be called the List Bitch.”

“The what huh?” Leo twirled around, making several strawberries fall out of his basket. Jason reached for the nearest one.

“No, that doesn’t quite rhyme. Also, they wouldn’t print the word bitch in the comics,” Jason argued. “List Bist. That rhymes. But it doesn’t make any sense.”

“List Bisque. Bisque is a word, right?” Piper tried.

“Yeah, it’s a type of soup I think. Lobster bisque is pretty good, or so I’ve heard.”

Piper nodded sagely again. “Lobster bisque. That’s good. Leo, if you were a Batman villain, you’d be Lobster Bisque.”

“What does that have to do with me? I am not a lobster and I don’t have a particular connection to soup,” Leo grumbled, picking more strawberries. Maybe he would let them take the fall for dish washing after all.

Jason shrugged and snatched another fruit while Leo wasn’t looking. “I don’t know, but I’m going to get Piper to change your name on my phone to that.”

“Ethan, Grandma and Lobster Bisque.” Piper seemed to envision it as she looked into the wide blue sky. She nodded sagely one final time. “Perfect.”

[fictionalcharactersaremypassion]

A Coming Out Party : Iggy Milkovich Style

Iggy don’t know much about this whole gay thing, but he’s fairly sure people did those whatchamacallit’s....comin’ out parties or some shit. 

It’s been a few days since Mick got his ass beat at the Alibi when he told everyone there he’s gay. The house is quiet again now that Terry’s back in the clink. It’s always a good day when that happens. 

Since that night, Mick’s been real leery around him and Colin. Total bullshit in Iggy’s opinion. Like they give a damn. But their youngest brother has this fucking stupid idea that they’re just like Tarry. 

Fuckin’ rude is what it is. 

Now Iggy isn’t the kind of guy that gets into touchy-feely territory with any of his brothers or sister, but he realizes this is kinda a big moment for Mick so maybe he should do something so his brother wouldn’t keep thinkin’ like a dumb fuck. 

Maybe he should throw him one of those parties. 

*

“You wanna throw Mick a party?” Iggy’s voice slurs. He’s more than buzzed by now, as he and Colin are sitting on the back porch drinking a couple or nine beers. 

It’s late, probably after midnight. The moon’s shining down on them and everything. 

“....kinda party you talkin’ about?” Colin is disturbed from his little daydream he’s got goin’ on. His eyes are still shut but he wiggles a bit to get comfortable again. 

“One of those gay parties,” Iggy says. “You know, them comin’ out things.” 

“The fuck does he need one of those ‘fore?” Colin says, confused. “He already did it at the Alibi.” 

“Yeah, but he still thinks we’re gonna hurt him or somethin’,” Iggy sighs, taking another swig. 

“He’s fucking stupid.” 

“The stupidest.” 

Silence falls over them. But it’s brief. 

“You really gonna do that?” Colin asks, brow raised and all. 

“Yeah,” Iggy shrugs. “Gotta show him what a dumbass he is. I don’t give a damn what he does.” 

“Yeah,” Colin echos. “I mean, I don’t see what’s so great about dick over tits-” Iggy agrees. It doesn’t make much sense to him. “-but Mick seems happy with Gallagher. Pretty sure I saw him smile the other day.” 

“No shit?” Iggy is smiling now. Damn, Gallagher was a miracle worker. Mickey never smiles. He must really like that redhead kid. 

He takes another drink of his beer. 

“You gonna buy all that rainbow shit?” Colin turns to him, and has a look of distaste on him. 

“Nah, that’s too gay,” Iggy shakes his head. “I’ll do something better.” 

“Like what?” 

Good fucking question. What did gay dudes like? 

“Dick,” Iggy says suddenly. 

“Huh?” 

“Gay dudes like dicks,” Iggy’s gettin’ all excited now. 

“Ain’t that obvious, Ig?” Colin says like he’s the stupid one now, 

Iggy waves him off. “We’ll throw him a dick party. It’ll be epic.” 

“A dick party?” Colin repeats, and looks interested. 

Iggy feels like a fuckin’ genius. “We’ll use streamers and make ‘em look like little dicks. And we’ll get hats and a cake from erotic shop downtown.” 

“A dick party,” Colin grins, and Iggy can see his brother is way past drunk at this point but he don’t give a damn. He’s on a roll! “Yeah. Let’s throw Mick a dick party.” 

“But we can’t tell him or Gallagher,” Iggy says seriously. “It’s gotta be a surprise so keep your damn mouth shut.” 

“Fuck you, I can do that,” Colin says, offended. 

“Then prove it, stupid,” Iggy leans back, determined to make this party a reality. 

*

“Ay, do me a favor,” Iggy abruptly comes into Mandy’s room. She’s sitting on her bed, scrolling through her phone, and looks up, instantly annoyed. 

Why is everybody around here so fuckin’ rude? 

“What do you want, assface?” 

“How about showing your brother some respect?” Iggy pouts. 

“Fuck off,” she says without looking up. 

He huffs. “I need a picture of Gallagher’s dick. You got one?” 

The streamers and other shit are easy to get. Colin stole them yesterday. Now they just gotta get the cake and Iggy has the perfect vision for it. He’ll get a picture of Gallagher’s dick so the baker can put it on there. Fuckin’ brilliant if you ask him. 

Mandy shoots him a weirded out look. “The fuck do you want that for? Are you gay too? ‘Cause I don’t think Mickey will be happy with you trying to steal his boyfriend.” 

“Nah,” Iggy said. “Wouldn’t wanna disappoint all the chicks anyway.” 

“You mean all the chicks that turn you down everytime?” Mandy snorts. “Those chicks, Ig?” 

“Fuck you,” Iggy grumbles. It’s true he hasn’t had much luck lately, but it’s their loss. He’s a fuckin’ catch. “You got the picture or what?” 

“No,” Mandy says bluntly. 

“Why the fuck not?” 

“Why would I have one?” She rolls her eyes. “I’m pretty sure Ian’s only sending those to Mickey.” 

“Then ask for one.” 

“No, I’m not doing that,” Mandy glares at him. “Go be a pervert somewhere else.” 

“The fuck am I a pervert for?” 

“You want a picture of Ian’s dick! You don’t think that makes you a pervert?” 

“It’s for Mickey,” Iggy says defensively. “Me and Colin are throwing him a party.” 

“What?” Mandy’s confused. “A party for what?” 

“It’s a dick party,” Iggy watches her furrow her brows. “You know, cuz he came out.” 

“You’re throwing him a coming out party?” she clarifies. 

“Yeah, but it’s a dick party. None of that rainbow shit.” 

His sister does this weird thing where she doesn’t know what to say, then she stares at him a little suspiciously. “That’s oddly nice of you, Ig.” 

What can he say? “I’m fuckin’ thoughtful.” 

“And modest too,” she says dryly. “But why do you need a picture of his dick for then?” 

“Cuz it’s going on the cake. We’re gonna get one from that erotic shop,” Iggy says proudly. 

Her eyebrows fly up. “Uh huh. Well, maybe you should just have them make one that looks like a dick because I’m not asking him for that.” 

“Fuck that. Just text him.” 

“No,” she sounds exasperated again. “Just go away. God...” 

Nah. This has gotta be good. Iggy’s not goin’ halfway. 

He snatches the phone from her hands, and she yelps. He quickly pulls up Gallagher’s contact, while trying to dodge her attempts at grabbing it back. 

“Give it back!” 

Mandy (2:45 p.m.): need a pic

“Iggy, I swear to God!” Mandy shrieked. “Give me the fucking phone!” 

Gallagher responds pretty fast, so he’s obviously not busy wherever he is. 

Ian (2.46 p.m.): what kind of picture? 

Iggy makes it out to the living room with Mandy hot on his heels. He’s typing quickly, eyes darting back up to ensure that his sister wasn’t near enough that she could swipe it back. 

Mandy (2.46 p.m.): a dick pic

Iggy thinks about this. He’s gotta make sure this sounds like it’s coming from Mandy. Hmmm. 

Mandy (2.47 p.m.): ❤️

“Here ya go,” Iggy tosses the phone back at her. He’s back to his own bedroom when he hears her shouting again. 

“Oh my God. I’m gonna fucking kill you, Iggy!” 

*

Him and Colin are at the kitchen table working on making all those little paper dicks.

“This is fucking boring,” Colin groans. They’ve been at it for a while now. He’s sober right now, they both are and this isn’t the kinda activity someone should do when they’re not drunk off their ass. 

“Almost done,” Iggy sighs. Feels like he’s been here forever. 

“Mick better be fucking grateful. Nobody went this hard for me after I kissed a girl,” Colin grumbles. The sound of snip, snip is heard through the air as he starts using the scissors again. 

“We should’ve. Fucking miracle a chick wanted to kiss you,” Iggy smirks. 

Colin flips him off. “At least I got kissed at ten. When was your first, Ig? Oh, right. Fourteen.” 

“At least I got fucked before you,” Iggy says, not to be outdone. 

“You mean Viktoria? I don’t think fucking our cousin counts.” 

“I didn’t fuck her,” Iggy makes a face. 

“She says you did,” Colin lets out a laugh. 

“No fucking way.” 

“She did,” Colin insists. 

There’s too much incest in this family. Iggy’s fairly sure this is why some of their relatives look so fucked up. 

“I didn’t fuck Viktora. Jesus,” Iggy huffs. “It was Courtney Langston.” 

“Courtney Langston?” Colin ponders this. “The one with the split tongue?” 

“Mhm,” Iggy wiggles his eyebrows. “Came in real handy.” 

Colin barks out a laugh. 

“You’re disgusting,” Mandy stalks over there with folded arms. She was seriously pissed for a while after Iggy sent that text off to Gallagher. 

“Come back to us when you’ve gotten fucked with a split tongue,” Iggy says smugly. 

“I’ll pass,” Mandy rolls her eyes. 

“Ay, help us with these,” Colin holds up the piece of streamer and gestures towards an empty chair. 

“I’m not doing a fucking thing after that fucking awkward conversation I had with Ian!” She snaps, and Iggy’s pretty sure she’s not above strangling him. “Mickey was all over my ass about it and it was your fault!” 

She pokes Iggy hard in the shoulder. Damn, why did she have to grow her nails out? Those fuckers hurt. 

“Sucks. Anyway, quit bitching and start helping,” Colin tells her after a beat of silence. Iggy snickers. 

“How many of those are you making?” Mandy asks but makes no move to sit down. 

Iggy pauses. He didn’t stop to think about that. “I dunno. Lots of ‘em, I guess.” 

“When’s Gallagher and Mick getting back?” Colin asks, carefully cutting the streamer. 

“Later,” Mandy says. “Around six, I think.” 

“Good,” Iggy nods. “I gotta go get the cake soon.” Unfortunately, he never got the picture of Gallagher’s dick so he had to improvise. It’ll look like any other dick out there. Fuckin’ sucks, man. 

“You’re really going out for this,” she notes. 

Iggy shrugs. He shoots Colin a glance and they try to ignore the awkwardness that’s comin’ over the table. They don’t do heart to heart talks and all. “Yeah, well. Only cuz Mick’s being a dumbass.” 

“Yeah, why’s he gotta assume?” Colin agrees. “If I was gonna hate him for it, I’d do it. But I ain’t, so he's not gonna go around thinking I will. That’s just fucking stupid.” 

“Yeah,” Iggy nods vigorously. She rolls her eyes. 

*

The living room and the kitchen are all decorated. Little dicks are hanging everywhere. The hats turned out to be a bust but ay, they’ve got a banner, though. 

It’s a makeshift one, written in Colin’s shitty handwriting. 

Guess you ain’t straight after all 

The cake is double chocolate, Mick’s favorite. Colin even stole some ice cream, Mandy bought some pizzas, and there’s plenty of beer to go around. It’s about to be a good fuckin’ party! 

For a while, they just kinda wait around and do nothing. It’s only when the clock strikes closer to six, and they see Mick coming up the street with Gallagher that Iggy hisses at the other two to get ready. 

“Man, fuck your brother. If Lip knows what’s good for him he’ll-” 

Mickey trails off at the sight of the party. Gallagher stops dead in his tracks beside him. They’re just standing there, staring stupidly at them. 

“Ay, there you are,” Iggy comes to clap him on the shoulder. 

“What the fuck is this?” Mickey is confused. He side-eyes Iggy, eyes darting from him and back to the party. 

“Your dick party,” Colin pipes up. 

“My...what?” 

Gallagher is less stupid. He gets it. “Is this a coming out party?” He says, amused. 

“Duh,” Iggy says. “Why do you think we made all those little dicks?” 

There’s a lotta emotions in Mickey’s eyes right now. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t move. His brian musta short-circuited. “Why the fuck did you do this for?” 

“Cuz you think we’re like Terry and we’re not,” Colin frowns. He’s already at the kitchen table, swiping frosting every now and than. Mandy’s leaning against the fridge, drinking a beer. 

“You didn’t even tell me, assface,” Mandy glares at him. “I had to figure it out myself. And that was after Ian told me way too much info about his mystery man.” 

“You made me tell you,” Gallagher insists. “You’re the one that wanted to know!” 

“Not about my brother’s sex life!” 

“Anyway,” Colin interrupts. “We did this so you’ll stop acting like a goddamn pussy around us and get over yourself.” 

“We don’t care who you fuck,” Iggy adds. “You’re still our brother.” 

“And a shithead,” Colin calls. 

Mandy raises her beer in a hear, hear motion. 

Gallagher’s smiling widely. Man, did anyone ever tell him he looks like bambi when he’s like this? “This is really nice, guys,” he says. “But what’s with the streamers? Are those-” 

“Little dicks!” Colin and Iggy tell him proudly. Gallagher snorts. But Mickey hasn’t said anything yet. He’s looking around, caught off guard and Iggy’s starting to wonder if he’s gonna lose his shit or something. 

Gallagher must sense the same thing. He places his hand on Mickey’s back, his eyes all soft. But then Mick shrugs him off, clears his throat. 

“Not like I need your fucking approval,” Mickey mutters gruffly, and the room collectively rolls their eyes. “But...thanks or whatever. At least I won’t have to beat your ass too.” 

“Like you could,” Iggy punches his shoulder good-naturedly. Mickey scowls, shoving him. 

“Maybe if you go easy on him,” Colin smirks. 

“Maybe you need to shut the fuck up.” 

“Ay, look at this,” Iggy cuts into the conversation to show them the look, lookin’ real pleased with himself. 

“Holy fuck,” Gallagher cracks up again. 

“Was gonna use your dick for it,” Iggy says to Gallagher, who’s eyebrows fly up to his hairline. “S’why I used Mandy’s phone to ask for a picture.” 

“Oh,” realization dawns on Gallagher. He glances at Mandy. “That makes more sense.” 

“So you weren’t tryin’ to get the picture for yourself?” Mickey still narrows his eyes at her. 

“No, douchebag,” Mandy glowers at Iggy for causing all of this. “It’s his fault. He took my phone.” 

“For a good cause,” Iggy shrugs. He’s not sorry. 

Gallagher moves closer to the cake. “It’s very realistic.” He sounds impressed. 

“It’s alright,” Mickey says, but Iggy can see the slight upturn of his lips. The bastard’s trying not to smile. That falls apart when Gallagher kisses him on the cheek. 

Fuckin’ sap, Iggy thinks fondly. 

“Can we cut this cake now?” Colin says impatiently. “I’m starving.” 

“Mandy, start servin’,” Iggy tells her. “Serve it yourself.” 

Iggy rolls his eyes but does it anyway. He hands the first piece to Mickey, even though Colin’s got his hands out to take it. “It’s double chocolate.” 

From there, it kind of dissolves into the usual chaos. 

Colin, like the uncivilized bastard he is, uses his fingers to take some cake. Mandy swats him on the hand, scolding him because they all have to eat from that. Iggy plops down in a chair, congratulating himself on a job well done. He watches his brother and Gallagher playfully threaten to dab Mickey with the frosting that’s on his finger, which elicits threats of violence from Mickey. 

Might be a lot of work for a few words spoken but Iggy knows it means a lot to his brother- they’ll have to take him down kickin’ and screamin’ to get him to admit it but it’s true. 

But that’s perfectly fine. Iggy loves the fuckwad and he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

[ethernitty]

i've come to explain.

jrwi (or just roll with it) is a ttrpg podcast. they've done a good amount of campaigns so far but a great place to start would be riptide bc it is, i would say, their most newcomer friendly campaign. apart from the fact that it is over 100 episodes. but they are currently on hiatus so no better time to start than now.

i feel like ttrpgs and improv theatre (especially longform) are like cousins. similar goofy energy, whole plot beats caused by a stupid bit, surprisingly profound emotion, etc. and jrwi is very silly and at times, when they let themselves run rampant, incredibly profound (and sad. seriously this podcast will fuck you up)

plus the boys have a very similar vibe to the sfth boys, only american (and canadian) and usually not in person (except for jrweek and the first few episodes of the suckening i believe)

some of the campaigns they've done are patreon exclusive but if you know who to ask that won't be a problem (you didn't hear that from me)

for a quick rundown of the campaigns:

first one is riptide. as mentioned above it is very long, but very worth it. it's a dnd pirate story, overall very lighthearted vibes with lots of fun combat and funny bits, but it's a real hard hitter in topics of family, loss, abuse, destiny and belonging, with occasional dips into horror territory. so many scenes where the players really get to show off their acting chops

their other longer campaign is prime defenders, a mutants and masterminds superhero campaign. another pretty silly one, with lots of found family, growing up, crushing responsibility and mortality. they got the va of danny phantom to do a line once. so that's pretty fucking sick

one of my favourites and pretty short is blood in the bayou, a call of cthulhu horror campaign set in louisiana in the 80s. pure fucking vibes, we've got a lawyer, a rockstar, and a 30 yo fuck up living in his parents' house. and there's blood. and a bayou. and so much weed. themes of childhood friends, blame, growing apart and facing past trauma

another horror one: the suckening, a vampire the masquerade campaign. ignore how stupid the title is, this is actually the best dming i've seen from any of the boys, with a very rich lore and dense and complex characters, taking on the big question of morality, bloodlust and humanity. it's also full of some of the stupidest, funniest, most demented bits ever. ✨duality✨

the one campaign that most would say makes for the neatest story is apotheosis. it's a dnd campaign about slaying the gods bc the gods are fucking shit up. it's also very gay and also very sexual. be warned they do not hold back in this one. but it's also an incredibly beautiful narrative and unintentionally very well foreshadowed.

then there's wonderlust, currently ongoing, dnd again, it's steampunk and it's about a furry community living underneath the human town. and then some alice in wonderland shit happens. trust me it's much better than how i'm describing it, but it is also just as silly as it sounds. consumerism and privilege and honestly i haven't been keeping up with this one so i can't say how the themes have been developing in recent episodes

i haven't actually seen total monster kill beyond the first episode, but that first episode was wonderful and i've heard lots of good things. it's about a monster hunter society. and corruption?

the other currently ongoing campaign is judgement (dnd yet again), and i'll be so honest i have not seen a lick of it yet (though it is on my list). i have heard however that it's got incredibly lovable characters

there's a few oneshots that are worth checking out too, and there's two currently unlisted campaigns from before they kicked their old dm off the team for reasons that you can look for yourself if you feel up to it

sorry for the long rant but. man i love this show. the blorbos. they keep me up at night

kinda late reply but oh well

they sound really interesting and i think i may check them out sometime (probably when i finish fantasy high because currently thats the dnd campaign im watching)

the vampire one sounds really fun to me, as well as some of the other horror/monster ones

[slvtzofhell]

My entire reasoning for why Daniel Larusso is the main cause of EVERYTHING following his arrival to LA, including counter arguments and rebuttals to said counter arguments. (I have too much spare time)

First of all, I want to make it VERY VERY CLEAR, that I don’t think it’s Daniel’s FAULT. “Fault” implies that Daniel did something wrong (purposely or accidentally) to hurt Johnny and therefore is a problem and is to blame. Daniel did nothing wrong, per se, he is simply the cause and root of everybody else’s fuckin problems. As always. (I’m kidding, but he is the reason everything happened including the entirety of the Cobra Kai show.)

All of this stays within canon; within what we see in the movie and show. I, nor anyone else, is able to change the plot or character’s personalities, or make hypotheticals to fit their argument because THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED. “Well he shouldn't have-” WELL HE DID. SO BIG DEAL. I’M WORKING WITH WHAT I’VE GOT. A real wife defends her husband as is. Some of the counter arguments people have given me extend beyond the canon plot, which is not fair.

Now I’m gonna write a very brief timeline!!!!

Daniel moves to LA

Daniel meets and hits on Ali

Johnny, who was doing FINE before he saw, crashes out over it (NOT VALID ON HIS BEHALF)

Johnny continues to torment Daniel 

Daniel seeks revenge (in the stupidest way btw, seriously, what does pouring water on somebody who beat you nearly half to death do.)

Mr Miyagi saves daniel, who both later decide to end things at the All Valley

Daniel wins which causes Johnny to get kicked out of Cobra Kai

Johnny loses everything and now has 30 years worth of hatred for Daniel

Johnny decides to reopen Cobra Kai in spite of Daniel

Kreese notices that Cobra Kai is back, hence he comes out of his little hiding hole and creeps back into Johnny’s life

Kreese coming back means Terry comes back

After Terry comes back shit hits the fuckin fan.

Counter argument 1

“If it wasn’t Daniel, it would’ve been somebody else.”

You’re right, somebody else would've hit on Ali eventually and it would’ve caused Johnny to freak out, but what are the chances that it's another karate fighter with a secret sensei who lives in his building. PLEASE.

If it were anybody else, 9/10 chances, it’d be some regular guy Johnny would beat up and be done with. If it were not for Mr Miyagi swooping in and saving Daniel by jumping Johnny and his friends, they wouldn’t have decided to settle things at the tournament, (seeing as that was Mr Miyagi’s idea) therefore, Johnny would’ve just fought whoever was coming second and slaughtered them and won first place, and he wouldn’t be kicked out of Cobra Kai with a bright future in fighting ahead of him.

Any other person would NOT HAVE LIVED IN THE SAME BUILDING AS MR MIYAGI considering it was a very shitty and small apartment with more old people than young teenage boys. (unless you count Freddy but he obviously has had no run-ins with Johnny and doesn’t like Ali). without Mr Miyagi, the entire tournament agreement wouldn’t have happened. Any other responsible adult would’ve just said “call the police lol” or “suck it up”.

Counter argument 2 

“Johnny was just waiting for someone to release his anger onto”

an ACTUAL argument from my dad. No joke

Yes, while I agree that Johnny would still be the same violent, “no mercy” fighter he always was, THE CIRCUMSTANCES WOULD’VE BEEN COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. 

Counter argument 3

“It’s Kreese’s fault”

If you really think about it, it’s that fuckass guy DAVID’S fuckin fault for insulting Kreese while he was at his diner job so much because THAT’S what inspired him to join the army, which fucked him up, caused him to create Cobra Kai in the FIRST PLACE, and push his army ideologies ONTO HIS STUDENTS

If you REALLLYYYYY think about it, it’s Vietnam’s fault for existing!!!! Then Kreese wouldn’t have a WAR TO FIGHT IN!!

IF YOU REALLY THINK ABOUT IT!!!!! IT’S THE FACT THAT WE HAVE A MILITARY IN THE FIRST PLACE. PEACE AND LOVE.

That’s how yall sound.

Kreese could still have taught everything he did to Johnny and have him end up completely the same, but the circumstances would be far too different if it weren’t Daniel. DANIEL. IS THE REASON. IT ALL HAPPENS. 

Without Daniel, Johnny wouldn’t have lost the All Valley to somebody, because nobody else lived with a crazy old sacred karate sensei in their shitty Reseda apartment complex AND happened to already know karate (to be fair it was the 80s and karate was huge) to have won against Johnny in the first place. Chances are, they wouldn’t have even been skilled enough to win ANYWAY. And even if they were, they wouldn’t have decided to settle everything at the All Valley because THAT WAS MR MIYAGI’S IDEA. BROJFHUIDJKFJSDFSDKV

Counter argument 4

“Johnny should’ve gotten therapy” -my friend He was a man in the 80’s lets be realistic lmao

Counter argument 5

“Johnny shouldn’t have xyz”

WELL HE DID. I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT ME TO SAY. He DID beat up Daniel, he DID crash out over his ex. He DID lose the All Valley and instead of seeking help, decided to sulk in his misery. I CAN’T CHANGE THE PLOT, I HAVE TO DEFEND HIM BASED ON WHAT HAPPENED. I’M SORRY.

Counter argument 6

“Then we wouldn’t even have a movie” -My mum

WHAT POINT DO YOU THINK I’M TRYING TO MAKE!??!?!? THAT’S THE WHOLE POINT. THERE WOULD BE NO KARATE KID IF THE FUCKING KARATE KID DIDN’T MOVE TO CALIFORNIA.

30 years later, Johnny is forced to see Daniel again

“I know that wasn’t you, it was Cobra Kai. We’re all better off without it, am I right?” 

This line provokes Johnny and reignites those 30 years of absolute misery and hatred towards Daniel that he reopens Cobra Kai in spite of him. After that, well, it was kinda out of Johnny’s hands.

Listen, what I’m trying to get at here is that if Daniel had never moved to California, none of it would’ve happened. The context would be completely different, and most likely, Johnny would just be beating up some regular kid who had normal parents and no sensei with an insane backstory to take down a group of bullies for him. I’m in no way saying Daniel did anything wrong, he’s SUPPOSED to be portrayed as this beautiful innocent angel who did no wrong, but don’t paint Johnny to be the literal devil himself. (even if his actions are very invalid a lot of the time).

NOBODY is at FAULT. and though I do believe everyone in the whole story is a liiiitle bit to blame, Daniel is objectively the root reason it all happened.

[eddsboxofdisectiontools]

Can you name the multiple "pedophiles" that are supposedly in the EEnE fandom instead of vagueposting and expecting people (who may also be minors) to find out for themselves, potentially the hard way? If you name them, we can block them, which is the best way to handle this sort of thing.

The way you put pedophiles in quotation marks tells me that you don't actually give a shit about this, you just wanna nitpick.

And as for "vagueposting" (what in the chronically online jfc) there are WAY too many people who are doing this, and you cannot expect ME to tell you. Literally all you have to do to avoid these people is block them when you see them posting about loving a character who's a minor when they're clearly over 14. Is it really that hard to do that yourself? There IS no "hard way", because minors who see my post will take it as a warning sign when they see it happening, if they haven't already. Practicing online safety is learning to recognize the warning signs and this is one of the warning signs you should learn to recognize. It's obvious, and anybody who didn't know it was obvious now knows because I pointed it out. If people coddled you the entire time by just "giving you the direct @", you'd be at greater risk of being harmed in the future because you don't know what the warning signs are. I am not your personal servant and if you cannot do something as simple as blocking somebody older and recognizing when you see them posting about how a child is their F/O, you shouldn't be online. Seriously. And I don't mean that in a mean way, either. If you are genuinely persuaded enough to miss the warning signs AND can't seem to learn them when people have DIRECTLY TOLD YOU what the warning sign is, I think you should stay off the internet until you can be safe on it, because if you can't hear somebody mention an obvious pattern and then recognize that obvious pattern, you can't keep yourself safe in other aspects.

I am not trying to be hard-headed. And I know some dumbass is going to try to use this as an excuse for some sort of personal slander; either way, I really don't care. I want you to understand that this isn't a case of "oomf is a pedo... Erm!" this is a case of somebody pointing out that there is an issue with people who try to disguise their pedophilic attraction with fiction, god knows what they could be up to in real life or even within the fandom. I have POINTED OUT what you gotta look out for. Get the fuck outta here with that "vagueposting" bullshit you chronically online people always use in the absolute STUPIDEST contexts. Maybe I wouldn't be pissy about it if this wasn't a huge issue within the fandom... How the hell am I supposed to NOT "vaguepost" about something that is happening across numerous accounts 😭

[bl33df0rm3]

Annoyed....Entitlement

i know i don't speak on this blog seriously like at all. But as a black bio female why do white fanfic readers and writers feel the need to defend their isolation of black readers (or anyone non white)? Like when people put in something along the lines.

"Zhongli's hand brushed along your cheek the once pink pale skin tainted a blush pink, made a smile tug at the corners of his lips."

Then black people are in the comments like

"Oh pink pale Skin? Lemme just 💁🏾‍♀💁🏾‍♀💁🏽‍♀💁🏼‍♀💁🏻‍♀" or something along those lines.

They get real offended and say the stupidest shit ever about how they write white Y/N only because they're white. NOT EVERYONES FUCKING WHITE? THAT DEFEATS THE PURPOSE OF A Y/N? How are people supposed to insert themselves into your writing.

Like if you can't or won't think about writing a universal self insert. Just tag it White!reader.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

(Tagging some fandoms and tags just for visability cause im fed up.)

Ps. Most of y'all are writing fanfics and especially smut over the age of 18. This should be basic knowledge.

[miiilowo]

Going through the recent posts on this blog has made me feel so validated in my opinion that this is probably the stupidest bit of fnaf lore ever conceived bc I’ve been seeing people on twt pretend like it’s genius and was planned from the beginning and stuff and I’m gonna be so real I don’t know how much longer I could’ve taken it . It’s so over

this is the stupidest thing theyve done so far because its not out there enough to be completely deniable (ex: springtrap mpreg) and we're just going to have to accept it and accept that people are gonna be using this to explain lore shit for the rest of time. this is fucking awful. i hate the illusion discs but the explanation for fnaf 4 is RIGHT THERE if you dont want it to be a nightmare. we literally already have an explanation. why on fucking earth did they think it would be a good idea to introduce HALLUCINOGENIC GAS CHAMBERS into fnaf. having william sic the illusion-disc-a-matronics on michael wouldve been bad enough for his characterization as is, but this is FAR worse. they have no idea what theyre doing. this is so out of character i cannot even begin to explain it. i know people who dont give a shit about him or his actual personality will think im pulling that out of my ass, but this seriously is so far out of the realm of "things william afton would feasibly do" that when i first saw a post about it i ignored it because i thought the person who made it was trolling. like i thought the MIMIC was bad. im so fucking sorry mimic baby youre not nearly as egregious as this come back im so fucking sorry

[saucy-mesothelioma]

For the movie ask-

26. 38. 40?

HOW DID I MISS THIS NOTIFICATION????

26. which movie made you think the most about life?: The Straight Story definitely. It's a movie very close to my heart, and it revolves strongly around the themes of keeping and maintaining all kinds of relationships. It's about the ties that bind us to those we love, to those we've met in passing, and even those who are no longer with us. The entire atmosphere is just simple and has a feeling I can only describe as home, with gentle music headed by acoustic guitar and violin and expansive shots of the rural Iowa countryside. It doesn't just make me think about life, but makes me reflect on it emotionally and I seriously can't recommend it enough.

38. in your opinion what is the most overrated movie?: The first movie that comes to mind is Fight Club. God that fucking movie. On one hand some aspects were fucking golden. The cinematography was beautiful at some points but in others it was absolute shit. It had a pretty good plot twist that is considered up there with the greatests of all time but also somehow has one of the stupidest and most incoherent plots ever. You could not pay me to watch this movie again. Two honorable mentions are also Ferris Bueller's Day Off and La La Land. Ferris Bueller definitely isn't a bad movie, but honestly Ferris just pisses me off (if I was in Cameron's shoes and he did that shit to me I'd deck that twink so hard) and I've tried watching the movie twice since my initial viewing and just can't get through it. And La La Land, although visually stunning (like the use of color in that film is fantastic) is boring as hell to me, and as someone who hates most musicals and can only stand romance when it's well written and believable to me, having to watch this for my film class a while back was not fun. Also adding this while writing the next number because the movie I talk about there made me think of this: Fuck Casablanca it's not horrible but it's barely even mid.

40. a film you think everyone should see at least once.: So I don't say The Straight Story again, I'm gonna pick one that might seem outta left field for people that know me relatively well and say When Harry Met Sally. Don't get me wrong, the "plot theme" that people who are the opposite sex can't be friends without some kinda romantic or sexual relationship is just...no. But the rest of the movie is absolutely wonderful. Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal have IMPECCABLE chemistry that only gets better the further you make it into the film. Their witty banter and genuine care for the other absolutely make this movie and I doubt I would like the characters as much as I did if they were played by other actors. I also want to give props to Bruno Kirby (Jess) and the absolute queen that is Carrie Fisher (Marie). Although their characters weren't nearly as prevalent as Harry and Sally, those two absolutely stole the show whenever they appeared on screen. In all honesty, when I started the movie I absolutely hated Harry and Sally. I thought they were both absolutely insufferable and they annoyed me to no end. But as the story progressed and they got to know each other better, I got to know them too. And by the time that they began to like each other, I found myself feeling the same way. Looking back at this revelation, I'm genuinely surprised that my opinions on the main characters changed just as their opinions each other changed and nearly at the same rate as theirs. Like that's never happened to me before in any movie I've ever watched. And also as an aromantic who is incredibly picky about my romance in films, this is probably one of if not the only romance movie I love because the progression of their relationship feels so fucking real to me. We get to experience the ups and downs and intricacies and explorations alongside the characters themselves over a span of years and it's genuinely fantastic. It allows for a deeper understanding of both the characters and their relationship, which in turn makes it so much easier to believe and root for. This is the romance movie I suggest to fellow picky aros when they want to try the genre, and I also enthusiastically suggest it to literally everybody else.

[henrioo]

CIS PEOPLE CANNOT DECIDE THE PARAMETERS FOR SOMEONE TO BE TRANS OR NOT

I'M FUCKING TIRED OF A CIS COMING TO ME AND SAYING I'M NOT A MAN BECAUSE I HAVE LONG HAIR, BECAUSE I LIKE DRESSES OR HIGH HEELS

THIS IS MY FUCKING LIFE AND I WILL CHOOSE HOW TO LIVE IT, I WILL CHOOSE HOW I WANT TO BE IDENTIFIED, I HAVE CONTROL OVER MY LIFE, NOT YOU

After this scream I'm going to vent a little because even though I'm a hard rock to break, it doesn't mean that things don't affect me

If they don't hurt me anymore, it will be very difficult for you to hurt me, you know, especially about my trans experience. It's hard enough to offend me, so getting hurt is even harder

But it doesn't mean it doesn't affect me, and it affects and affects me, frustrating me, making me mad at a level where I often question how someone is so stupid

There's this woman (cis straight) and we were from a common group and we became friends, everything was fine, we had similar tastes, etc

But she did something that really irritated me, which was writing Mpreg, if you don't know why this is transphobic, etc. I genuinely don't feel like explaining now, but feel free to send me a message and I'll explain it better later and no, it's not necessarily forbidden to write Mpreg because of this, ok? It's more complicated than it looks

But I ignored it and like I said, mpreg is transphobic but being a writer or artist who uses it doesn't make you one, it's different, you know

But I started to notice the signs, one of the first was how she REFUSED to write trans men when it came to mpreg, she said she simply didn't like it and felt it wasn't her style, She also said that she would much rather have men giving birth through the ass than using a natural biological process that is men giving birth through a vagina

You may not see transphobia in this but it's fucking weird

And then I also started to realize that she was strangely obsessed with gay ships, to the level of just liking them and refusing to imagine them with women or accept other couples

It was also very strange that she EXCLUSIVELY liked gay couples, seriously, both the extreme of only liking LGBT couples and only liking straight couples is problematic, ok?

And now I found out that she also came up with this talk about Yamato being a woman, and I just started to get pissed off because it wasn't just like, oh that's my opinion, She spoke in a way that was like, this is a fucking truth and if you don't believe it, you're seeing something that isn't there

AND HOLY SHIT, WHAT IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM WITH PEOPLE WANTING TO DICTATE WHAT MAKES SOMEONE BE TRANS OR NOT???

WHY DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO SAY THAT A CHARACTER IS NOT TRANS WHEN YOU ARE A FUCKING CIS??? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BE TRANS

And all her arguments were bullshit about Yamato only being inspired by Oden, what a holy shit it already happened, right, use a real argument, holy shit

I'm just fucking tired of people like this

People who aren't even trans thinking they know what it's like to be trans, who know how trans people manifest themselves and expose themselves

No, no, Yamato took showers with men because he likes Luffy, ahem, of course that was it

No, no, Yamato continued using male pronouns even after saying he no longer wanted to be Oden due to Oda's mistake, of course

No, no, Yamato being called son by Kaido himself which only shows that his father knew and supported, besides showing the rest of the world calling him daughter is not a parallel for trans people who are in the closet and can only come out to their parents and sometimes not even that, Of course not, Oda would never think of that pfft

I'm tired, tired of seeing stupid people, because seriously, a person is not stupid because they don't know something, a person is stupid because they refuse to learn something

And transphobes and homophobes are the stupidest people on the face of the earth because they will always refuse to learn

And besides being funny, it's kind of sad, because they never keep it to themselves, they always need to attack others to prove it

Well I never think anyone reads my huge posts but I like to vent on them because I like tumblr

So my dear trans colleague, don't be discouraged, don't be afraid, don't give up

Because you are a star that will still shine brightly in this sky and these idiots will be far below you, millions of light years away, seeing only an illusion of your light, because you will be so badass and so brilliant, that they won't be able to come close to admire your true light

[micetown]

to anyone who thinks people are fearmongering about trump please take a fucking second to remember that fearmongering involves exaggeration. people arent fucking exaggerating about the destruction trump will do if he gets into office again. please please please look up project 2025. its not a fucking exaggeration. its real. stop pretending that you can just not vote and that will do anything!! people who support trump will vote no matter how much you think we can just boycott voting. you are just giving them the win at that point! i genuinely cant understand how fucking out of the loop of the world you must be to think boycotting voting will do jack shit in this stupid country.

also i think some people have this idea that there arent a lot of trump supporters. well thats great if you are in a place where you dont encounter any, seriously that sounds wonderful. but i regret to inform you that they do exist and there are still a lot of them. less than 5 minutes away from my house there are people that hold little trump rallys every couple of months. 3 members of my extended family are very heavy trump supporters and there are at least 7 that are probably going to vote for him. by my house there are multiple people on the street with trump flags still flying. and thats all just stuff thats close to me. in this little bubble. please stop pretending that just because you and your friends know trump is awful that it means the rest of the country agrees with you. it is important to realize how many people still support him. because if you dont it can lead people to do what i said before, be stupid and think its better to not vote.

if you need people to say shit about what great things biden has done and the good sides of him and all that shit to literally think you shouldnt vote against trumps plans for a dictatorship then you are fucking hopeless. you shouldnt need people to win your over with biden to vote against trump. if you arent a white cishet ablebodied christian man then you will be fucked if trump gets into office. i dont like biden. im not going to sugar coat that man so that people dont vote for someone who will strip them of all of their rights. open your fucking eyes. boycotting voting is the stupidest shit ive ever heard.

[theblackfemininesociety]

Why would a guy be continually not wanting to answer my questions saying “You ask the stupidest fucking questions as if we just met, Why are you asking so many questions…he kept on avoiding my question if he just wanted to hookup I said to him “Did you just want to hookup if I come? I’m confused by our last conversation you were saying how you wanted me to go to Naples instead because you’ll be able to spend more time with me” and he goes “bruh Like how are you seriously always so lost. Shits ridiculous.” And I was like “okay…I’m not” and he goes “I’m so bored of this. Goodbye for good.” And I was like “How’re you always so lost? I’ve told you many times… I don’t know why you do this. You say you want me to come and that we won’t just hookup, then say I should go to Naples so you’ll spend more time with me..and you’re confused as to why I’m confused? …what At this point I am lost You just want to upset me. I’m over it It’s really frustrating how I have to tell you the same things over in conversation like how I don’t want to come just to hookup…I’ve told you this and yet we still have the same conversation and you act like I’m not understanding. Idk what I’ve to make you think otherwise” and he goes “Ok then don’t worry, we won’t see each other anyways” I don’t know why he’s being like this to me…even before he kept on ignoring me asking about it saying to “just come”.

Hey bestie!

Thanks for coming to us for advice and guidance.

It seems as if you are having a communication issue with this person, are you only texting? Maybe this is a phone conversation since you can’t meet face to face so quickly.

Also, by the information you’re giving us this person has a problem with not only being patient but considerate of your feelings and how to respond to your feelings with care and understanding. Your questions are valid. Don’t allow yourself to be gaslit or shamed for wanting clarification.

Now we are going to give you a hard pill to swallow, be ready to receive this with love and respect:

Not only do you set the tone for how you want to be treated, you also have to stand on your boundaries! If this person is making you feel uneasy and anxious, step back, look at what you want… does this align with that? If not, this may not be the person for you and that’s okay! This is why self love and self awareness is important to have.

✨We recommend you confiding in a trustworthy friend who will give you a voice of reason and fresh perspective on your situation. If you don’t have someone please try a therapist! (Don’t be ashamed or offended, my therapist changed my life!) In between confiding with a love one or a therapist, we want you to keep a journal, write down not only your thoughts and feelings but what you want ! Use this as an opportunity to build self awareness, love, and confidence within yourself!

We hope this helps 💋

✨If you need sisterhood we have a discord with chat rooms filled with like minded ladies that can help and guide you! You can join under your real name or an alias account. Just be prepared to hear: hard truths, lessons and fresh perspectives from your sisters at BFS 💖

↓ TO JOIN CLICK THE LINK BELOW ↓

[foreverfairytailfan]

🚨RANNT ABOUT FAIRY TAIL HATE INCOMINGGGG🚨

Long rant. Like LONG long. Feel free to scroll on by but I seriously needed this off my chest so just be prepared if you decide to read it💀 also not trying to (and wont with all due respect) debate with anyone about the things I’ve mentioned below, this is just purely how I feel inside atm, plus it’s super sloppy and emotionally charged; I would’ve done a much better job at talking if it was a debate post, but it’s not lol. Debating stuff about FT can always happen another time on another day so hopefully this post isn’t misunderstood to be starting something, just a simple rant :) okaythanksforyourtimehaveagoodday

Mentions of death, as well as murder/killing

——————

ARGH THESE FAIRY TAIL HATERS GET ON MY NERVES SOMETIMES FOR REAL! LIKE I GET PERSONAL PREFERENCES BUT THEY HATE OVER THE MOST STUPIDEST THINGS ABOUT IT!!

One thing I always see people complain about is how Fairy Tail hardly has any killings. First of all, wtf??? How have we become so desensitized that we want to see innocent characters to die? Like I get it contributes to good story telling by expressing the emotional process of it all, and I certainly know I’m not immune to a good and gripping character death when it’s done right, but come on do we really need to have people dying left and right ALL THE TIME?? If the story has to have so many deaths 24/7 to make it a good story, is it really a good story?

Second, there was in fact death in Fairy Tail; it’s just not enough death for people to mention apparently?? While the deaths are rare in FT, when they happen I think it hits harder, and it makes it much more personal because it’s not a normal occurrence. It affects you on a deeper level because you weren’t expecting it already, you know? It shows us that death shouldn’t be taken lightly.

Third, death is not gonna happen frequently for Fairy Tail. Why? BECAUSE THEY ARENT ACTIVELY FIGHTING CRIME!! THEY ARE NOT A GUILD ABOUT FIGHTING PEOPLE!!! They. are. not. superheros!! They are a magic guild that cares about family, their town and townspeople, and supporting one another. They always try keep the violence to themselves (aka roughhousing) and taking jobs that can have potential battles involved.

They don’t ask to be dragged into shit like guild wars, fighting literal dragons and crazies, and life threatening forces! They fight because they’re good people who want to protect the ones they love, innocents, and their planet. This is not a shonen about killing their enemies and bathing in their blood and victory, all they want is to have peace and fun with each other. There is more to the story than death. There are multiple tragic things that happen in the series that are just as heartbreaking as a death.

It’s a feel good series that doesn’t focus on the deep negatives, but how people overcome said negatives and use the power of the love for their found family to fight for what’s right. You say it’s a surface level series, but the truth is your not willing to look deeper under it because you can’t be bothered to see there is more to a series than many deaths, killings, etc.

there are so many shows and mangas like FT that don’t get a quarter of hate like FT does and I just think it’s incredibly stupid and unfair to target a show over petty reasons such as LACK OF DEATH?? It’s a wonderful show that is supposed to cheer you up and make you feel happy, why can’t we just have a series that’s exactly like that and still be considered a good story? And yes, Fairy Tail isn’t perfect; no series is. It has its flaws just like any other shonen.

My point is that FT is picked on way too much for reasons that other anime’s display as well, and that there’s a lot of hypocrisy in FT haters. I never understood why Fairy Tail was the scapegoat for all the hate when their favorite shows and mangas do the exact same thing! If Fairy Tail isn’t what you’re looking for, then move on without shitting on it.

The people of Fairy Tail are extremely important to me, as cheesy and cringe as that sounds. They raised me, taught me lessons that I still hold dear to my heart to this day. It has picked me up in times of need while still being able to evoke strong emotions from me. It just gets under my skin when so many people either pick it apart and don’t bother to dig deeper behind the meaning of it, or just sexualize the characters constantly without paying attention to the valuable lessons we could be learning from them instead.

I know it’s just a show/series at the end of the day, and I shouldn’t let it bother me this much; but I can’t help it, the characters are like family to me and have helped me process many emotions and gotten me through dark times. I just think if you’re gonna hate, you should do your research first and then come back with plausible reasons. I respect all opinions (as long as it doesn’t hurt others) and I never try to say that they’re wrong and I’m right blahblahblah because we all have our own preferences and that should be celebrated, as well as be able to have the right to express them; but let’s not over do it with hate outloud and in the open where people can be affected by the hurtful things you say.

[afniel]

Fall asleep

Immediately have nightmare.

In the nightmare I am also asleep?

Fucking inception type ass shit.

In the nightmare I am also talking in my sleep and possibly singing something though I don't remember what now.

I suspect I was actually doing this in real life too but I can't prove that and my partner isn't home so I can't ask someone else.

Then suddenly a cat is on the bed?

"Well that's not correct," I think in my nightmare, "they're all outside the bedroom. How could a cat be here. I know there aren't any cats in the bedroom."

I open my eyes. Probably in real life, because I have been known to do this in my sleep and it usually results in me having absolutely wild hallucinations.

Absolutely tame hallucination: there is a cat standing on the bed.

"Okay, that still doesn't seem right but I guess that's just what's happening."

(This is also why I don't lucid dream: I will inevitably convince myself that my dream is totally reality, you guys, seriously this is actually happening for realsies.)

The cats in my nightmare start crashing around downstairs and knocking things over and being so loud I'm sure they're destroying the house. Dishes are breaking. Furniture is falling. I'm going to be sweeping glass for a week.

...While Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik in G Major, K. 525: I. Allegro plays, because I can't just have a normal stress nightmare, I have to do it funny style.

Except.

EXCEPT,

Instead of strings, it's entirely played on the Mario Paint meowcat.

Yes I did actually factually wake up in terror from this don't EVEN fucking ask. This is STILL not the stupidest nightmare I've ever had!

Also I had the brain zaps again which is really, really making me think the nightmares are not the cause but a symptom themselves. It's almost always basically immediately upon falling asleep, it's always a nightmare, and I suspect there's some element of sleep apnea involved. Y'know. Despite me religiously using my CPAP. I'm beginning to wonder if I don't have some combo apnea, because I should not be having obstructive apnea episodes, but I sure do wake up like I'm drowning sometimes.

SERIOUSLY THO WHY THE MEOWCAT MUSIC. WHAT WAS SCARY ABOUT THAT I NEED TO KNOW!! Like my nightmares are usually unrealistically on the nose for subject matter but this is just ??? what. Mario Paint Meowcat Mozart? That's what's gonna have me wake up gasping? Okay. Sure. That may as well just happen.