#paper rings

[andichoseyou]

paper rings / champagne problems / you're losing me

[whocaresstillthelouvre]

Paper Rings - A Joel Miller Drabble

Rating: Explicit. 18+ (Minors DNI) Pairing: Jackson Joel Miller x Female Reader Word Count: 750 Summary: Signs of you are all over Joel's bedroom in Jackson. Warnings: Smut, slight somnophilia, drinking.

Thank you to @beskarandblasters for the amazing Taylor Swift Drabble Challenge, I picked Lover because I've been listening to a lot more of it as the weather begins to get warmer. "Paper Rings" is definitely not my favorite Taylor song, but oh my god I LOVED writing this about Joel, it fits perfectly for him.

If you want more Joel. My works are here, here, and here.

***

The story of your romance with Joel Miller could be told with just one look around his bedroom. 

The picture frame on his dresser with a picture that you painted of the two of you the night you met.

It was quite a meeting, a quick slip on the ice as you stepped off the curb on your way to the Tipsy Bison to celebrate Tommy’s birthday, Joel jumping towards you to catch you. His hand grabbing your blue jacket’s shoulder before you fell into the large pool of water leftover from the melting snow. You both making your way to the Bison together, his handsome face taking your breath away once you saw him in the light of the high moon. You became fast friends, urged on by Tommy and Maria’s matchmaking. Your friendship accidentally turning into something more after a night of drinking and dancing together in Joel’s kitchen. The two of you sharing your first kiss as you slowly swayed along to a Neil Young record. The kiss turning heated, turning into Joel taking you from behind as you gripped his kitchen countertop.  

The books you’ve read stacked up on the table beside your side of the bed. Your favorite chapters marked with the bookmarks you made.

He’d always try to bring you home a book to make up for how early he’d have to leave for patrol on Monday mornings, the day always being more sad and dreary due to his absence. He’d always succeed at not waking you up until he’d kiss you goodbye. He found it hard to control himself when he’d hear you let out a small sleep drunk moan as his lips touched yours. Some mornings he could manage it and walk away, and others he’d be late to the stables, leaving you satiated and smiling after gently fucking you in the light of dawn. 

The comforter rumpled on the floor in the corner, left there from when Joel threw it off the bed last night before he made love to you.

Your glass is still sitting on the coffee table half full of wine, the thought of finishing it out of your mind once Joel began kissing your neck. You were teasing each other all day, playing a game of cat and mouse. Biding your time until both of you couldn’t take it, Joel stalking behind you up the steps as he threw his shirt off and started unbuttoning his jeans. 

The t-shirt of Joel’s you wear to bed with the large blue paint stain on it from the time you helped him paint Tommy’s house. 

He loves to see you in it, your body filling it out in places he loves to touch. He loves how you smell of him whenever you wear it, how it sits against your smooth skin. He loves it when you ride him while wearing it, seeing his clothes on his girl as you grind your hips.

The sheets on the bed always on your side, Joel sleeps warm, he never needs a blanket.

You like to watch him sleep, his face more at peace, his breathing relaxed and slow. A small grunt usually escaping his mouth when he turns away from you, followed by a hum of contentment when you wrap your arm around him. Sometimes you’ll wake up before him just to watch the rise and fall of his chest quicken as you take his cock into your mouth. Joel always waking up thinking he was having a dirty dream until he looks down and meets your eyes staring up at him. A small half smile as he realizes what comes next, his tired eyes growing larger with lust. 

The jewelry hung from the hooks surrounding the mirror above his dresser. 

The mirror that Joel loves to watch himself kiss you in. Sometimes because you had a long night. Sometimes because it’s the best way he knows to tell you it’s gonna be alright. Sometimes because he waited his whole life for you. He loves to stand behind you and watch his reflection touch you, he loves watching you gasp as he sticks his hand down your pants. 

The paper rings on each of your nightstands. 

Joel secretly teaching himself how to fold them as a way to surprise you until he could find a ring that would fit you. He just couldn’t wait to make you his wife.

[cassandrattpd]

wrap your arms around me, baby boy 💕

[breakbleheavens]

In paper rings, in picture frames, in dirty dreams Oh, you're the one I want

TAYLOR SWIFT performs PAPER RINGS for the first time ▸ The Eras Tour — Minneapolis, Minnesota (Night 1) | June 23, 2023

[hope-ur-ok]

The crowd was so LOUD for paper rings

[ourlastkiss]

the fuck of it all is she would of married him with paper rings

[florencewellch]

Reputation or Lover this or that. Ready for It or Cruel Summer? End Game or Paper Rings? Delicate or The Archer? LWYMMD or Me!? So It Goes... or I Think He Knows? Gorgeous or London Boy? Getaway Car or Death by a Thousand Cuts? Dancing With Our Hands Tied or Cornelia Street? Dress or False God? This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things or I Forgot that You Existed? Call It What You Want or Lover the song? New Year's Day or Daylight? Reputation or Lover?

[finthegood]

I'M WITH YOU EVEN IF IT MAKES ME BLUE

jj maybank x fem!reader

description: jj and rafe get into a fight over jj being poor. you end up having to clean up your boyfriend and assure him that you still love him. inspired by taylor swift's "paper rings." a lot of this is word vomit.

tw: violence, talk of socioeconomic status, fighting, money insecurity, and a plethora of injuries (shown above).

word count: 861.

five punches and a lot of yelling later, you were sitting on your bathroom counter with jj standing guiltily between your denim-clad legs, eyes running over your face and licking his bleeding split lip.

"stop licking," you demanded mindlessly, voice only a whisper. jj jumped, slightly shocked to hear your voice for the first time since you had fled upstairs with him in tow.

"sorry," he replied roughly.

you had your head tilted to the side, trying not to block the light as you ran a cotton swab over his busted cheek. he tried not to wince at the feeling of cold ethanol alcohol in the wound, but his eyes squinted at the corners. you dabbed it with a dry cloth, before pulling the split together with a butterfly bandage.

as you tried to clear some of the blood off his jaw, you sighed. "i don't really know what to do about the lip. i don't think that i can put neosporin on it, so it's gonna hurt."

"that's okay, it already does."

you gave him a sharp look.

"sorry," he winced.

you chewed the gum in your mouth, having lost the majority of its flavor, now just making your jaw sore in solidarity to your boyfriend. "i know you are," you swallow. "i just don't understand why. we talked about this jage."

he closed his eyes and you watched his adam's apple bob in his throat. he opened his mouth, but nothing came out and he looked ashamed. after a pause, he began to talk.

"i can't stand rafe. i don't know what it is about him, because he isn't the only person who doesn't like me. hell, he's not even the only person who doesn't like me because i'm poor. he just-" he let out a broken sigh. "he just gets under my skin every time, and i don't know why. he makes me so angry, i can feel it boiling under my skin and i just black out. i'm sorry." his voice is hoarse and you know he means it.

"i know."

"i don't even feel bad because he's such an asshole. he has everything. and i don't have shit and he talks and talks, but he doesn't even understand what he's saying because he can't because he has always been fucking rich and i wish i could have that life." his words are spilling out of him, sentences wrapping around each other and his eyes are going glassy. it hurts your heart to see him like that.

you wrap your arms around his neck and hold him, even though you are still angry, because the hurt is sour between your teeth, and you need him to know that he isn't alone.

"but this time was bad. i'm happy your dad was there so fast because i think i could have really hurt him this time," he says it like a secret because it is, but between you two it's just the truth. "he said that i didn't deserve to be at a party like that. that i don't deserve you and your family because i'm just some asshole with no one, with nobody waiting on me or for me. i know you say he's horrible and i agree, but i just think sometimes that if it was a choice between me or him, everyone at that party would choose him, because he's just less trouble."

his words are muffled by your neck, but the meaning is clear. you raise his head and you are inches apart. his breath fans across your face. you rub his unbruised cheek with your fingers and meet his eyes, determined.

"i choose you," you state. he makes a wounded noise. you press a soft kiss to his cheek, trying to move oceans with one small kiss. trying to communicate how much he means to you.

"i'm sorry," he whimpers.

"i don't care about the money, jj. i love you. i choose you. even if i have to clean you up in my bathroom every weekend. even if we both have to be normal people with normal jobs, who work and struggle. you are worth more to me than rafe and this stupid kook shit could ever be."

"i know, i know. i love you and i'm sorry," he winces.

"well, i'm not so stop apologizing," you laugh.

"okay, sorry," he says, laughing loudly when you glare. he leans in to kiss you, split lip be damned. it's gentle and slow. his lips are warm and soft. he deepens the kiss, just looking to kiss. not pushing you to do anything, never asking for more than you give. he licks into your mouth and you sigh.

you kiss for a few minutes before you remember his lip and pull back. he chases your lips mindlessly and you snort. "your lip, baby." he groans and you have to stop yourself from continuing.

his hands rub your waist and you admire him. there is a bruise beginning to form on his jaw. you want to bite it. he swallows and whispers, "i like your earings."

"shut up," you snicker before going to kiss him again.

[dumblr]

[darkacademiaposts]

hey (with the intentions of reading all the books beside your bed)

[nari-roll]

—wriothesley, who loves to spoil you so if he were to propose, he’d make sure to buy at least 3 or 5 pretty rings for you to choose from because he wants to make sure everything’s perfect, but you’d pretty much marry him even if he proposed with paper rings.

i’d ask for his hand in marriage

[andichoseyou]

staring at the ceiling with you

oh, you don't ever say too much

do something babe

say something (say something)

lavender haze / paper rings / exile / hoax / midnight rain / bejeweled / hits different/ bigger than the whole sky / the great war / you're losing me

[gofightwin]

you’re the one I want

[drarrily-we-row-along]

October 2: Friends, Family, Loved Ones

It was Harry’s birthday, and as much he felt embarrassed when a big fuss was made over him, he loved that Draco had planned him a party out in the manor grounds, a big white tent lit up with sparkling fairy lights.

The food was good and the company even better. All of his friends, family, and loved ones gathered around playing games and telling stories; then once they were drunk enough, singing karaoke. He was giggling into his glass of wine (his favorite: Draco had given him an entire bottle just for him) as Hagrid finished a mopey ballad.

Draco was looking unbearably smug about how happy Harry was and Harry couldn’t help but find the smugness horribly endearing. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to his rosy cheek, warm from wine and happiness, “I love you,” he murmured before tucking his nose against Draco’s neck, “thank you for a brilliant birthday.”

“Sap,” Draco accused with a soft tsk, but he was pulling Harry closer, pressing kisses into his hair. “I have one more surprise for you,” he said, and Harry could hear the quiet undercurrent of nerves.

He kissed Draco’s neck, pausing to suck lightly at it just to hear him gasp and feel his body wriggle, “you’ve spoiled me rotten today already,” he said and he’d meant it to sound accusatory but it only came out ridiculously pleased and terribly fond, his whole chest like spun cotton candy, fluffy and light, and sticky sweet.

“Well,” Draco said, “this one is a little bit selfish.”

Harry hummed and just cuddled a little closer so that he was more in Draco’s chair than his own.

"I have to get up to give it to you," he said, chuckling softly and pressing even more kisses into Harry's hair.

With a heaving sigh, he forced his body upright once more with a piteous groan.

His boyfriend leaned down and pecked his lips, "Love you," he murmured against his mouth.

"Mmmh," he hummed, wrapping a hand around Draco's neck and drawing him closer.

"Menace," Draco murmured, kissing him, kissing him, kissing him, like there was nothing else that he'd rather do.

Harry grinned up at him when he pulled back, trailing the tips of his fingers over Draco's flushed cheeks.

"Tell me you love me," Draco requested, soft and sweet, smiling and open.

"I love you," he said, soft and sure, the truest thing he's ever known.

With a mischievous smirk, he gave Harry a wink and sauntered off. It was a couple minutes later when Draco appeared on stage, wearing a sequin top and a pair of short white shorts, tummy peaking out as he pulled the microphone out of the holder.

He cleared his throat, "I wanted to thank you all for being here to celebrate my very favorite person," he said and Harry's face stretched into a smile so wide it made his cheeks hurt. "And also for bearing witness to what's about to happen," he added as the choruses of 'awws' and whistling died down.

Draco gave a nod to Blaise who was standing at the ready by the karaoke machine waiting to hit play. And then Draco started singing, looking out at Harry with a huge grin.

"The moon is high, like your friends the night that we first met," he started.

And Harry laughed at the memory, they had all been high that night after they'd graduated. Lounging about or dancing around the club, causing all sorts of chaos.

"Now I've read all of the books beside your bed," he continued with a wink. Harry grinned up at him, because that was true too, they'd read most of them together, actually, curled up under the duvet. He hadn't been read to as a child, but Draco more than made up for it with the voices and the dramatic way he read.

"The wine is cold, like the shoulder that I gave you in the street. Cat and mouse for a month, or two, or three," he sang on, twisting his body to look at Harry coyly and Harry remembered the months between when he’d started to feel attracted to Draco and when Draco had started to believe him, "now I wake up in the night to watch you breathe."

There was another round of 'awes' and some pretend wretching but Draco rolled his eyes and sang on. Meeting Harry's gaze once more as he sang, "I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings," and Harry's heart flew into his throat at the implication, did he mean it? Was that even possible?

"And I hate accidents, except when we went from friends," he gestured between the two of them, "to this."

His heart burst, Draco did so hate the unplanned, abhorred surprises. That proclamation-

"Darling, you're the one I want in paper rings, in picture frames, in dirty dreams-" a chorus of laughter and whistling broke out and Draco's cheeks flushed bright red but he kept singing, staring at Harry with a naked devotion and affection.

He couldn't breathe with it, his heart rattled painfully around his chest.

Draco sang the next verse before jumping down off the stage and making his way to Harry, bending down as he sang "kiss me once, cause you know I've had a long night," Harry leaned in obligingly and kissed his cheek. "Kiss me twice cause it's gonna be alright," and there were those nerves tingling from Draco's consciousness and into Harry's. He leaned in and kissed his cheek again. "Three times, cause I've waited my whole life." And this time he leaned in to press a hasty kiss to Harry's lips like he couldn't help himself while they counted him back in.

He sang the refrain again, climbing into Harry's lap as he melted into the bridge, "I want to drive away with you, I want your complications too, I want your dreary Mondays-"

Harry's throat went tight around those words, around the way that Draco loved him when he couldn't make heads or tails of the darkness that threatened to overwhelm him.

"-Wrap your arms around me, baby boy," he said, giving one of Harry's arms a little tug.

He repeated the bridge, wrapping an arm around Harry's neck and carding his fingers tenderly through Harry's curls, making Harry tear up again as he stared up into those beautiful silver eyes.

Draco moved into the refrain again, slower and a little sweeter, like a promise. "I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings." Harry gripped him a little tighter, "you're the one I want," he sang softly. "And I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this, uh huh, darling.”

He jumped up, Harry’s fingers trailing after him as he went, singing the refrain again as he made his way to Pansy who was holding out a small box for him. “In paper rings, in picture frames, in all my dreams,” he sang as he made his way back over and dropped to his knees. “You’re the one I want,” he sang, looking up as he opened the box to reveal a gold band.

Harry’s hands flew to his mouth, like a complete cliche, “Draco,” he whispered as the crowd around them went unnaturally still.

“Marry me?” he asked, eyes tight around the edges like he thought Harry could possibly say no.

“Yes, of course yes,” he said, “you silly, perfect man. Of course.”

The room erupted into cheering but Harry could hardly hear it, too wrapped up in his love to notice.

—————————

Written for @flufftober prompt 2 “friends, family, loved ones”

[demonphynx]

* Paper rings by Taylor Swift playing in the background*

[in-my-feels-probably]

Paper Rings by taylor swift with sirius black

Paper Rings

Request: Paper Rings by taylor swift with sirius black

Hi! So sorry for the wait, I was in a bit of a writing slump, and then I was a little busy. I was just writing a fic before this request and it took me so damn long to finish it, but I finally did. Now I’m here! I love Paper Rings, it’s such a sweet song. Hopefully you can see the lyrics interpreted in what I wrote. Thank you for the request! I hope you enjoy it :)

(Warnings: like one swear word, mentions of Sirius’s home life, insecurity, very brief underage drinking, let me know if i missed anything)

—

You truly met Sirius in the beginning of your Third Year. 

You had known of him beforehand—even briefly chatted with him during classes and in passing—but you weren’t friends. Lily Evans was your friend, and Sirius was her friend. So, by extension, you two were…something. 

You didn’t know each other well enough to consider yourselves friends. 

You had always liked him, though. You thought he was charming, funny, and annoyingly beautiful. Maybe a bit loud, but it was also an endearing quality. He thought you were pretty, and bookish—not that that was a bad thing—and a little quiet compared to himself. But there was something about you that he liked, and he wanted to know more about you. He just didn’t know how to go about it. 

That was until, in the middle of Third Year, you stumbled into each other’s lives.

Quite literally stumbled, to be technical about it. You were on a late night trip to Hogsmeade after dinner, Lily and a few other friends by your side. You had snuck out of the castle on a whim, Lily for once actually recommending you break the rules to have a little fun. You were walking past an alleyway when three boys came tumbling out of it, the one in the front accidentally knocking himself into you. You stumbled back on your feet, but you were steadied by a loose grip on your forearm. 

You looked up to see who it was, eyes widening in shock. “Sirius? What are you doing?”

“These two are pissed,” he motioned back towards who you recognized to be James and Remus. “I’m taking them back to the castle before we get ourselves caught.”

What you didn’t know at the time was that the full moon would arrive in just a few days, and the boys knew about Remus’s condition. They skipped dinner to get a few things, and then decided to stay out so they could have a little fun before Remus would be out of commission for a few days. It was a story you’d be told later on in your relationship with Sirius, but as of this meeting, you just assumed they were looking to get into trouble. 

And you wouldn’t be taken down with them. 

“They’re a little loud, don’t you think? Do you plan on getting us all caught, or do you think you can manage getting them back to your dorms unharmed?”

Sirius grinned, raising a brow at your sharp but playful tone. “There’s already been a little bit of harm, actually. Prongs fell, and—”

“Prongs?” You asked, eying both the boys knees. 

“James, I mean,” he corrected, motioning back to the flush cheeked boy who looked a solid minute from keeling over. “I don’t think he’s ever drank like this before.”

“I’m a good boy! Mum would skin me if she knew,” James inserted, hanging his arm around Sirius’s shoulder.

“She absolutely would not,” Sirius groaned, wrapping his arm around James’s waist to keep him upright before turning back to you. “Sorry, as you can see he’s a bit in over his head. He tripped earlier and scuffed his knee. But don’t you worry…I’ll keep him quiet long enough to get him back. Wouldn’t want to take all you ladies down with me, now would I?”

You watched him for a moment, deliberating, before pointedly walking around to his other side, taking a hold of James’s other arm. You turned around to face Remus, offering your free hand. 

“Do you need help, too?”

“Y/N!” Lily rushed out in a hushed whisper, looking around to see if anyone was watching. “What are you doing? We’ll get caught!”

You shook your head, grinning. “Not if we’re careful. We should be heading back anyway.”

“Are you sure?” Sirius asked, a bit confused as he watched James lean some of his weight into you.

“I’m sure,” you mused, turning back to Remus. “What about you?”

He was clearly amused by the whole situation, content to watch from the sidelines. He raised his hands, motioning for you to go ahead. 

“I think I’ll manage, don’t worry about me.”

You nodded. “Alright, then. Shall we go?”

“I think I’m going to be sick,” James mumbled suddenly, making both your and Sirius’s eyes widen.

“Alright, let’s go, let’s go! Merlin, Prongs, I swear I’ll hex you till your eyes cross if so much as an ounce of vomit lands on my new shoes.”

“How gallant,” you mused, although you were now a bit wary about being this close to James yourself. “You can always get yourself another pair.”

You caught a glimpse of his grin from the other side of James. “It’s the principle, darling.”

Together, you managed to sneak everyone back into the castle without alerting anyone. By the time morning came, no one would even know you left. You walked James all the way to Gryffindor tower, everyone quietly chatting amongst themselves. Lily eventually had to hex James’s mouth shut when you passed the Prefect dorms, afraid he’d get you all a month’s detention, or worse.

He—even after all these years—still insists that he considers that night to be the moment he truly fell in love with her.

Remus, pretty much sober now at this point, took on the task of getting James into the Common Room and up to bed. The girls whispered a hushed good night, going to bed soon after. When they were gone, it was just you and Sirius, standing out in the lamp lit corridor.

He gave you an awkward smile, leaning up against the wall. “So…what were you girls doing out so late? It’s against the rules.”

“It may be,” you nodded. “But you were out there too.”

“I’ve got so many detentions wracked up that I’m expecting a Howler from my Mother any day now. I have never seen you, however, in any sort of trouble, let alone in detention. You’re not fooling me.”

You grinned, a glint in your eye. “Maybe I’m just better at not getting caught than you are.”

Sirius felt something flicker in his chest. A faint sensation, no more than a second, but it was there. It was something. The glint in your eye made him want to stand on his toes and lean over the edge until he fell overboard into the depths of you. Your mind was something to be explored, and your heart an adventure to be had. His curiosity got the best of him, and he couldn’t let you go without solidifying another excuse to see you.

“Thank you for helping me bring James up.”

You shook your head. “It was no problem. You looked like you needed the help.”

“I think there’s an insult hiding in there,” he chuckled, ignoring your teasing. “But I’ll forgive it, considering you risked your own shoes to help me. I don’t suppose you let me thank you properly…maybe on your next trip to Hogsmeade?”

“You’re trying to buy my time, Black? Need a friend who won’t need you to carry them home?”

He huffed nervously, retreating. “It was just an offer, love. You can just say no.”

“I was kidding, Sirius,” you smiled, shaking your head. “I’ll go with you. But there’s no need to buy me anything. I’ll take your word as enough thanks.”

His confidence slowly returned, his usual smirk reappearing. “Like you said, love. If I have the means to buy myself a new pair of shoes, I can certainly buy you a butterbeer or two.”

You playfully rolled your eyes, biting your tongue. You supposed that was Sirius’s thing. Winning people over with his charm and riches, so they’d never stop and try to look any deeper. But there was more to him. You could see it. And you wanted to get to know him, not shrouded by his show of wealth. 

“I can pay for my own butterbeer, Sirius.”

He grinned, the glint now in his eye. “We’ll see about that.”

—

You spent most of your spare time with Sirius for days after your first trip to Hogsmeade.

He made good on his promise. 

Despite your efforts, you walked back to the castle with a bag of Cauldron Cakes from Honeydukes and a Sneakoscope from Zonko’s. He rationalized it by saying that you could share the sweets with Lily, and use the scope for when you needed to find him when he was creating mischief somewhere in the castle—which you’d later use the Marauder’s Map for. You could have refused them, but you knew he’d make you accept the gifts anyway, even if he couldn’t come up with a valid excuse to buy them for you. 

Over time, you stopped scolding him for buying you things. You knew he’d do it anyway regardless of what you wanted, and it was easier to thank him than argue with him.

Your trips to Hogsmeade became trips to the Astronomy Tower, or the Room of Requirement whenever you wanted to be alone together. Picnics down by the Black Lake—or winter swims, even though it was freezing—to evenings at the Quidditch Pitch where you’d watch him practice tricks and fly laps between the goal posts on his broom. He even resorted to spending afternoons with you in the library, watching you read with a content smile on his face. Of course, he’d eventually get bored and bother you too, but he was so adorable that you’d usually pack up and follow him wherever he was begging you to go.

The gift giving didn’t stop. 

It was one of his main love languages. He wasn’t always the best with words, but he prided himself on his ability to understand a person and know what would make them happy. No matter how small or big the gift, he’d love seeing the little smile on a person’s face when they opened it up. The way their eyes would light up when they realized that another person had thought of them enough to get them something they’d like. 

It was intimate. 

It was easy and natural to Sirius. 

A locket with room for a photo in the middle, a bouquet of flowers, a book you’d been mentioning you wanted to read, one of his old sweaters that spent more time in your closet than it ever did in his.

Money was never a problem, so he never even gave it a second thought when he’d see something on a shelf at a store and immediately think of you. He’d buy it and happily give it to you, telling you to get over yourself when you’d tell him he shouldn’t spend so much money on you. You’d try and gift him things too, but he considered himself infinitely better at giving gifts than getting gifts. 

“Beautiful girls deserve beautiful things,” he’d always say, and you couldn’t help but flush and grin every time, dropping the subject. 

It became a staple of your growing relationship together. Eventually, days with Sirius turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. You couldn’t pinpoint the exact time that it happened, but it was without a doubt—you had fallen for Sirius Black. 

And you had fallen hard.

—

Before you knew it, years had passed. It was Fifth Year now, and you couldn’t love him more. It was an accident, really—falling in love.

Loving Sirius was as easy as breathing.

Every inhale was another second you got to love him, and every exhale was the comfort of knowing that he loved you just as hard. It was bliss.

If only you knew what was coming.

Sirius had run away a week before. He’d gone straight to James’s house, scared out of his mind. He hadn’t even been there more than an hour before James had sent word to you. You were on his doorstep in mere moments after, begging James to let you in so you could see him. Although he knew Sirius was in a fragile state, he reluctantly let you in. 

There was no harm you could truly ever do to him, and, if anything, you’d bring some good.

Sirius always had an unusual peace about him when you were around. Maybe it was your calm demeanor, or your ability to make silence comfortable. There wasn’t any reason you could pinpoint, it’s just how it was. You were always able to calm him when he needed you to.

Euphemia spent most of the evening tending to him before you were allowed to go up. 

He had taken a few calming draughts, and he was quite tired by the time you knocked on his door. Euphemia let you stay with him for half the night before she made you get up so he could get some rest. She knew there was no telling you that you couldn’t see him, and she knew you’d help him rest easier. 

You sat up against the headboard, Sirius resting with his head on your chest. You had the blanket pulled up tight around him, one hand tangled in his hair, the other secured around his shoulders. You were quiet for a long while, doing nothing but listening to him breathe. Each exhale gave you a little bit of peace. 

They meant he was alive. 

They meant he was here, right here, and he was safe in your arms. Nobody was going to hurt him, and they most certainly weren’t going to take him away from you.

It must have been an hour before he finally spoke. He clung to you, his voice muffled into your shirt. He sounded so small…and it broke your heart.

“You don’t have to stay with me,” he whispered, though he made no move to let you go. “I may be a burden, but I don’t have to be your burden.”

“Don’t say that!” You rushed out firmly. 

Your grip on Sirius tightened, and you could feel him let out a sigh. His chest rose and fell as he tilted his head up to look at you. 

“And why not? It’s true—”

“It isn’t!” You interrupted, looking him in the eye. “Sirius Black, you listen to me…you have not been, and you never will be…a burden. Do you know how many people love you?”

He said nothing, only staring up at you with sad eyes. You frowned, reaching down to tuck a stray piece of hair behind his ear. You cupped his cheek, running your thumb along the top of his cheekbone. 

“Look where you are. You’re home and safe with a family that loves you and considers you their own. They’re your family, Sirius…you’ll never be a burden to the people who love you. You’ve got Euphemia and Fleamont. You’ve got James, and Remus, and Lily, and Marlene, and Frank and Alice…and Regulus, and your Aunt Andromeda…I could give you an endless list of people who care about you. People who love and adore you so much.”

You hooked a finger under his jaw, making him look you in the eyes as you spoke. He let you, his hands still clutching your shirt.

“And I love you,” you whispered, tilting his chin upward. “I love you so much that it scares me sometimes. I don’t think it’s normal—to feel like this about another person.”

You smoothed your hand over his hair, leaning down so that your forehead rested against his. You spoke softly, so soft that you could practically hear your own heart beating.

“I would follow you wherever you wanted to go. I don’t care where, I just want to be with you. I want to sit with you and listen about your day, however good or bad it was, and talk with you until we can’t keep our eyes open and we fall asleep. And I want to wake up next to you—wherever that is—and I want to lay with you until we have to drag ourselves out of bed and start our day. I don’t care where we are, I don’t care what we’re doing, I don’t care who we’re with…I just care about you. And I would give up anything to have that life with you. Anything.”

Please believe me, you thought to yourself. Please believe how much I want you.

You watched his eyes brim with tears, and you could feel his hands shaking as he held you tighter. A stray tear spilled over the top of his cheek, and you were quick to wipe it away with your thumb.

He let out a long breath. “That’s a lot of love.”

You managed a small chuckle, smiling down at him. “It is. I’m not quite sure what to do with all of it.”

“I’ll take it,” he replied, once again letting his head rest on your chest. “It sounds really nice. If you’ve got no one else to give it to, I’ll take it.”

You nodded, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “It’s all yours, love. All yours.”

—

Sirius got better, with time. 

Sirius’s parents never came for him, although an owl from his brother came a week after he left to let him know just how finished with him their Mother was. He’d been permanently burned off the family tapestry. 

He had laughed it off when he found out, letting out an exasperated sigh. “Just like my Aunt Andromeda. Always one with a flare for the dramatics, my Mother.”

“Is that who you get it from?” You teased, ducking when he chucked a pillow at your head.

“Be nice to me!” He pouted, crossing his arms over his chest as he laid back against the couch. “I’m fragile right now.”

You rolled your eyes, leaning over and pressing a sloppy kiss to his cheek as your way of silently apologizing. It made him giggle, which was a sound you didn’t realize just how much you’d miss until it was gone. You’d have done anything to hear it again and make him smile.

His pout disappeared, replaced by a small smile and flushed cheeks. “Alright, I guess you’re forgiven.”

“How generous of you,” you mused, grinning. 

“It’s a gift.”

The days rolled on, and he slowly returned to his usual self. 

Euphemia and Fleamont treated him like he was one of their own, and James was relishing in having another sibling. He’d already considered Sirius a brother, but living with him somehow made it more official. 

Remus came over whenever he could, and you spent every spare minute of your time at the Potter’s. Euphemia said it constantly looked like a parade of zoo animals running around her house, but you could tell she was secretly enjoying the company. Like you, she had a lot of love to give—and you and all your friends were her honorary children that she could love and spoil. 

You were beginning to realize why James had turned out how he did. Like the sun, personified.

Eventually, Sirius seemed entirely himself. He was back to cracking jokes and getting into mischief, never a dull moment with James by his side. He didn’t often speak of home, but when he did, it was of lighthearted memories and long forgotten tales. Everyone kept him well occupied, and he learned to fill the rare silences and still moments when he was alone with things that made him feel hopeful and content. 

If you were anyone else, you would have missed the signs. 

He seemed entirely happy to the untrained eye. But you noticed something was wrong during quieter moments when his mind would stray, and there was this far off look in his eye. It was minuscule and fleeting, but it was there. You knew it was bothering him, and yet, he never brought it up. You figured it was best to stay quiet and let him come to you about it…but he never did. And the far away stares were becoming more and more frequent. 

One evening, you couldn’t help but gently confront him about it. If there was any chance you could bring him some peace, you had to at the very least try and get him to fess up. 

You were sitting on the porch, watching the stars twinkle in the night sky. It was just after dinner, and he had been uncharacteristically quiet the entire time. You couldn’t stay at the Potter’s every night, but on the nights when you could, he was usually quite excited. It was unusual for him not to be teeming with excitement, and you led him by the hand to the porch the minute dinner was over and everyone had dispersed.

“What’s going on, darling?” You asked, your shoulder brushing his as you laid down on the porch floor next to him. “You’ve been quiet.”

“Nothing,” he shrugged, keeping his eyes on the stars. 

You gave him a pointed look, but turned your attention back to the sky as well. “It’s not nothing, Sirius. You’re quiet, and you’re never quiet…and you may be quiet right now, but I know your mind isn’t. I can practically hear the cogs turning. You can tell me what you’re thinking about if you want to. You don’t have to, of course…but I’m right here if you do want to.”

Neither of you knew at the time that his Uncle Alphard had set aside a small fortune for Sirius to live on until he came into his own, which subsequently got him burned off the family tapestry too. 

He was a blessing, and you’d always be eternally grateful for what he did for Sirius. It truly changed both of your lives.

The money didn’t pass to Sirius until after Alphard died, so Sirius was under the assumption that the inheritance he’d been promised all his life was taken away from him. That fact had been bothering him since he left home, and the reality of his situation was beginning to set in.

“I’m just worried,” he finally murmured, rolling over to face you. 

You rolled to face him, so close that your noses were almost brushing. “About what?”

“About how long James’s folks are gonna let me live with them. We’ve only got two years left, and I’m sure they’re not looking to support another child that isn’t even theirs.”

You frowned, reaching for his hand and intertwining your fingers. “Don’t worry about that, Sirius. They’re happy to take you in, and they’re absurdly rich too. I don’t think you’re going to make a dent in the family fortune.”

He could tell you were trying to make light of the situation, using humor to make him forget about how much the Potter’s were doing for him. He shook his head, growing frustrated. 

“I don’t want to make a dent. I don’t want them to feel like they have to take care of me, even if they have the means to. They shouldn’t have to support me, I should be able to do it on my own—”

“You’re still a kid, love,” you interrupted, squeezing his hand. “You shouldn’t have to worry about those kinds of things yet. They wouldn’t want you to.”

“And what about after school? What about when it’s time to move out, and I’ve got nowhere to go?”

“You can go with James,” you tried to rationalize.

“And when he gets bored of me? When he gets tired of living in a flat with another grown man, and decides he wants to settle down in a house of his own.”

“Then you can live with me,” you said softly, eyes softening on him. “James is your brother, and he’ll never grow tired of you, but you’re right…he will eventually want to settle down on his own. But then you can come live with me. I told you, Sirius…wherever you, I go. No matter what. I promised you.”

He shook his head. “I can’t ask you to do that, darling. How would we live? I won’t be able to give you all that you deserve, and I refuse to let you accept anything less.”

“Beautiful girls deserve beautiful things, right?” You asked, offering him a small smile. “That’s what you said to me. And I’ve got my beautiful boy…that’s all I’ll ever need. The rest of it doesn’t matter. We’ll make it work.”

There was a choked sound in the back of his throat, and he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck so you weren’t able to look at him. You wrapped your arms around him as he took a deep breath, feeling his chest rise and fall under your touch.

“I don’t deserve you,” he mumbled into your shirt. “I’m going to ask you to marry me one day. Merlin, I hope you say yes.”

You shook your head, chuckling, sitting up and pulling him with you. You tugged the spare hair tie off his wrist, twisting it around your finger until it was bundled into loops. You slipped it over his ring finger on his left hand, securing it in place. 

“I’d marry you with nothing but one of these around our fingers,” you smiled, twisting the hair tie around and around. “I like shiny things…but I’d marry you with paper rings…a rubber band, or a string, or a tattoo—even a Ring Pop, I don’t care—it doesn’t matter. As long as I get to marry you.”

He was quiet for a long moment, a silly grin on his face. His cheeks were flushed, and he knew he was beet red, but he didn’t care. He just cared about his girl—the one who just said she’d marry him no matter what. He felt like his heart could explode.

“What’s a Ring Pop?” He finally asked, smiling wider when you let out a bright laugh.

“It’s a muggle thing. A lollipop carved into the shape of a giant jewel or diamond, and it’s melted onto a plastic ring you can slip on over your finger so you can wear it while you eat it. It’s cooler than it sounds, I promise.”

“I think it sounds very cool,” he said as shook his head, grinning. “It’s good to know you like them. It may be all I can afford.”

You smiled, continuing to twist the tie around his finger. “As long as it’s the blue raspberry one. Those are the best ones. Turns your tongue blue, though.”

“Is there a red one?” He asked, and you nodded, making him grin. “Good. Then we can make our tongues purple.”

“Sirius!”

—

The day his inheritance came in was the happiest he’d been in a long time. 

Euphemia and Fleamont had kept him well taken care of, but he wasn’t content. He didn’t want to spend any more money than was necessary to get him the things he needed, and he often went without some of the things he wanted. 

But what he really wanted, and what he really missed…was being able to get things for you. 

James had a countless number of times seen him staring longingly in a store at some little knick knack and offered to buy it for him, but Sirius always politely refused. He never felt right about it. You were content to never receive another thing from Sirius ever again. You didn’t need him to spend a galleon on you. But you knew it made him happy to give people things. It wasn’t just you he missed spoiling. 

So when the money came in, he had a field day. Everyone who had supported him and loved him since he left home received a gift of some kind within a week, and Sirius hadn’t smiled that wide like he did watching people’s eyes light up as they opened them in a long time. 

He saved you for last, pulling you aside one evening after a gathering at the Potter’s. He pulled a small box out of his pocket, tied shut with a ribbon.

“Sirius,” you gasped, eyes widening in shock. “Is that—”

“It’s a promise ring,” he finished for you, slipping the ribbon off.

You felt your stomach knot itself up, afraid your palms were beginning to sweat as he opened the lid to show you the ring. He grinned when you paled. 

“Don’t worry, it’s not a real silver band. And it isn’t a diamond—it’s a moonstone. Lily told me it’s a symbol of protection or something like that. I figured that you’ve spent so long protecting me, it’s my turn to start protecting you.”

You raised a brow. “You’ve been talking to Lily about this? No wonder she and Marlene have been so secretive recently. I was beginning to think I’d done something wrong.”

“Apparently, McKinnon has a thing for astrology and crystals and all that shit. Someone should tell her she’s a witch,” he chuckled, pulling the ring out of the box. “Lily helped me pick the band a few days ago. The shopkeeper thought we were a couple while we were in there.”

“I’m sure Lily loved that, and I'm definitely sure it amused you,” you laughed, smiling at the thought of Lily scrunching her nose up at the mere insinuation that she and Sirius were together.

“It most certainly did.”

He pocketed the box, holding his hand out for you to take. You placed your palm in his, letting him slowly slip the ring onto your ring finger. He twisted it around once, before squeezing your hand in his. 

“I’ll get you the real thing one day.” 

You smiled, admiring the ring. “It’s beautiful, Sirius. Not as tasty as a Ring Pop, but I love it.”

“I love you,” he breathed through a laugh, running his thumb along the back of your hand. “And I love that you would have let me propose to you with a Ring Pop. I love that you want a life with me, and Merlin, I want it too. And I love how you make me feel. I love that you feel so deeply and love so hard…I love that you love me just as much as I love you.”

You felt your chest swell with emotion, feeling your eyes sting with tears. You gave him a watery smile, squeezing his hand tightly in yours.

You were only able to choke out a few words. “I love you more.”

He laughed, like you had just said the most unbelievable thing he had ever heard. He hooked a finger under your chin, titling your head up until your eyes met his. He looked at you a long while, before shaking his head.

“Impossible, darling.”

—

A/N - Hi!  So so sorry for the long wait, it took me so long to get this out. I really enjoyed writing this one, I really appreciate the request. Small Fleabag reference for my girlies who caught onto that. I hope you enjoyed it! Let me know what you think :)