#part of the honors society that has to do with this award and presentation night

[julesnichols]

Shoutout to the professor at this event tonight who absolutely BODIED this kid when giving him an award by saying "oh he's here tonight, he wasn't in my class earlier today"

[biblioflyer]

X-Men: Disproportionate Power, Disproportionate Disorder

Superheroes and Villains are already well understood to complicate traditional understandings of crime, law enforcement, and general social cohesion. When large numbers of people start manifesting powers, the problem only grows. As does the existential dread.

Previously I discussed why X-Men as a setting is fundamentally pessimistic as a necessity according to the creative choices made. It is an essay in 5 parts:

1,2,3,4,5

This is a new series analyzing how experience and social status influences Mutant outlooks on the assimilation vs separatism/supremacy question.

The last part unpacked Xavier’s relatively pampered background and how it likely made him more optimistic, but also how he’s seen more of the sharp end that he’s usually given credit for.

Mutants complicate systems of justice. Assuming the same spectrum of morality as Sapiens, Mutatis with Dark Triad personalities and high power levels, perhaps even Omega level, represent an existential threat. Unlike mortal Premieres and Presidents, someone like Apocalypse can’t easily be thwarted by a minion who simply doesn’t follow orders. Incidentally, I’d happily swap out pretty much any Federal holiday for a Vasily Arkhipov day.

X-Men is also rife with examples of Mutants with more minor abilities using them for criminal intent. Although we could of course fairly ask whether the lack of acceptance pushed them to this, we still must expect that even in a more just society, some Mutants will suffer mental health crises or otherwise simply be contrarian and problematic because it's part of the natural spectrum of Humanity.

Much of social thought is oriented around the idea that you can design a society that rewards good behavior and works around the worst instincts of humans very effectively. Debates over models and systems are functionally debates over what is the more correct understanding of human motivation and behavior and the best way to encourage “good” behavior and discourage “bad” behavior, and to a great extent by what rubrics we should judge good and bad. 

I think all told, we have done better than many historical societies: a person in the 70s/80s would be shocked at how low US rates of violent crime are. This is the era that gave us Escape from New York and Judge Dredd: the idea of entire cities as prisons. 

This is perhaps not an unfamiliar concept to those who watch closely the status and fates of stateless and displaced people now that information more widely circulates, but many people had their ideas about cities shaped by historical crime waves. Many people are also slow to update their assumptions about cities and carry those biases to the present..

I’ve seen it noted that the correlation between living in a rural area and skepticism of government and the regulation of behavior, the so-called “nanny state”, may represent a difference in experience. In the country or small towns, dumb or antisocial behavior has lighter consequences. It impacts fewer people. If you’re playing around with distilling, making homemade explosives, or just having a loud party, the distance between homes often means it's largely the problem of the people involved in doing something reckless or stupid if something goes wrong.

If you throw an all night rager in a densely packed apartment building with walls that wouldn’t pass muster as Amazon packing material, you’re likely to make a lot of enemies. Same as if you start playing around with toxic chemicals. Expectations that people will simply self-regulate, following the honor system or being wary of its dark twin: the Darwin Award, simply fall apart when there are too many people in too close of quarters. 

Eventually someone’s judgment is going to be dubious because even under the most ideal of circumstances, you probably can’t quite keep every last outlier on the Bell Curve from frakking around and finding out.

Now add superpowers into the mix. 

So we who exist outside of the narrative need to contend with this: Human fear of the consequences of Mutant powers wielded by the unscrupulous or disordered is rational.

Collective punishment and oppression of Mutants remains cruel and unjust.

Next: The precariousness of passing and the earned cynicism of those who have known only the wrong end of the boot.

[duadaily]

dualipa: I was delighted to join Amal and George Clooney this week as they honored courageous defenders of justice and human rights through the Clooney Foundation For Justice’s Inaugural Albie Awards. It was inspiring to witness what a just society could look like through the tremendous work of all the honorees presented that evening.

I had the honor of presenting the Justice for Survivors award, alongside my dear friend Nadia Murad to iAct, for its work with survivors of genocide and other mass atrocities. iAct worked with the Clooney Foundation for Justice to interview survivors from Darfur, Sudan, who have been trapped in refugee camps in Chad for over a decade. Using this evidence, Amal Clooney represented over 100 survivors in a trial of a militia leader at the International Criminal Court.

I’ve learnt through my friendship and my campaigning work with Nadia Murad just how important it is to gather testimony from survivors of genocide, and to do this in a sensitive way. It is very difficult to ask someone to relive their trauma, but as Amal has demonstrated, survivors hold great power through their testimony in trials against perpetrators of mass atrocities.

It was a privilege to be a part of this night with old and new friends coming together to honor these great defenders of democracy, equal rights, free speech, women’s rights, racial equality, and justice for survivors.

@clooneyfoundationforjustice @iactivism #TheAlbies

[dualipahls]

dualipa: I was delighted to join Amal and George Clooney this week as they honored courageous defenders of justice and human rights through the Clooney Foundation For Justice’s Inaugural Albie Awards. It was inspiring to witness what a just society could look like through the tremendous work of all the honorees presented that evening.

I had the honor of presenting the Justice for Survivors award, alongside my dear friend Nadia Murad to iAct, for its work with survivors of genocide and other mass atrocities. iAct worked with the Clooney Foundation for Justice to interview survivors from Darfur, Sudan, who have been trapped in refugee camps in Chad for over a decade. Using this evidence, Amal Clooney represented over 100 survivors in a trial of a militia leader at the International Criminal Court.

I’ve learnt through my friendship and my campaigning work with Nadia Murad just how important it is to gather testimony from survivors of genocide, and to do this in a sensitive way. It is very difficult to ask someone to relive their trauma, but as Amal has demonstrated, survivors hold great power through their testimony in trials against perpetrators of mass atrocities.

It was a privilege to be a part of this night with old and new friends coming together to honor these great defenders of democracy, equal rights, free speech, women’s rights, racial equality, and justice for survivors.

@clooneyfoundationforjustice

@iactivism

#TheAlbies

1/10/2022

[fykimtaehyung]

[ARTICLE] Break the Internet: BTS

PAPER: What's the greatest challenge you've faced as a group, and how did you overcome it?

RM: Seven grown men always staying close together and experiencing work and life at the same time means that we come face to face with numerous contradictions and differences. But I think we overcame that by working on understanding and caring for each other over time.

Suga: Seven men with different values living together was not easy. It was difficult for all of us to focus our thoughts on one single point, but looking back, they are all good memories.

J-Hope: There was a time when we fought each other quite a bit because we all came from different backgrounds and our personalities were so different. But we were able to overcome that after frequently talking to each other and living together for a long time. We now know what each of us are thinking just by looking at each other.

Jimin: Because each member was so different, I think it was hard for everyone to understand each other. But we didn't give up, and now we are a team where each member is irreplaceable.

Jungkook: When something I said or did caused an issue or made people feel disappointed, I realized that I should think twice before I do anything, and not forget where I am, no matter what situation I may be in.

If you could switch talents with one of your bandmates for 24 hours, who would you choose and why?

RM: I would like to dance like J-Hope just for one day. What would that feel like?

Jin: V's ability to memorize choreography. I want to say to RM, "Have you already forgotten [the moves]?"

Suga: RM — I want to be good at English.

J-Hope: Suga's amazing producing skills!!!

Jimin: J-Hope's smiley face. Looking at J-Hope, I think his smiley face is really adorable.

V: I want to borrow RM's brain and make a whole bunch of songs.

Jungkook: RM. I want to write really nice lyrics and have deeper thoughts.

Do you ever feel pressured, in the face of global fame, to present yourselves a certain way to the world? What do you do when you feel overwhelmed to be “perfect"?

RM: It would be untruthful if I said there was no pressure. Still, on stage I want to do really well.

Jin: I try to keep myself on the right lane.

Suga: I would not be telling the truth if I said there's no pressure. But what can you do? Pressure is also one part of life.

J-Hope: I can't say we don't. These days, I feel like I live with a sense of mission. Rather than thinking, “It has to be perfect!," I do what I have to do, making sure I remember the really important and fundamental things and trust that the results will follow.

Jimin: All things aside, I always think that I have to show a performance that is at least close to perfection for everyone who comes to see our performance.

V: I feel the pressure of showing a performance that is close to perfection, but I also think that being natural is important, too.

Jungkook: The pressure is always there. But I want to show them that I am improving.

Is there any advice you wish you could give your younger selves?

RM: If you're debating whether to go or not, go.

Jin: Jin, study English!

Suga: Please study English.

J-Hope: When things get tough, look at the people who love you! You will get energy from them.

Jimin: Silence is golden. Don't waste time.

V: You worked hard! [Pat on the back.]

Jungkook: Don't lose the people beside you because of your mistakes and wrongs. And live [your life] to the fullest.

You recently took an extended vacation in order to rest and get some relaxation after a long span of releases and promotions. How did you spend your vacation?

RM: I slept, worked out and went to art museums quite a lot. I went to Jeju Island, Venice, Vienna and Copenhagen.

Jin: I played games at home. I also went fishing with Suga.

Suga: I focused on resting and worked on some songs. It was a time [for] looking back at myself.

J-Hope: I went to film the music video for "Chicken Noodle Soup." I felt and learned a lot of things! I can't call it a rest time, but it was a meaningful time. After that, I came back home, I had good food and rested well. I also played with my puppy.

Jimin: I just kept on the move and went to a bunch of places. It was an opportunity to think about [the group] in the past and in the future.

V: I took a good rest. It was an eat-play-sleep routine.

Jungkook: I worked on music.

Are there any music styles you haven't tried yet as a group that you're excited to dip into in the future?

RM: I want to show our various sides that reflect the progression of our age as well as our emotions and sensibilities.

Jin: I want to try something in the genre of rock. I think it will come out great because our members are pretty charismatic.

Suga: There are so many I don't know which one to say. There's plenty of things to show you, so please look forward to it.

J-Hope: Now it feels like BTS is just BTS. Whichever [style of] music or performance, it comes out in BTS style.

Jimin: There are so many things I want to try, but I don't want to be too specific about it.

V: I want to try doing music in the style of Conan Gray or "All Tinted."

Jungkook: It's different from time to time. I just hope I can widen my vocal spectrum regardless of what that might be.

Your fans, ARMY, are one of the most passionate, mobilized music fanbases in the world, especially on social media. How would you define what makes your fanbase so special?

BTS: It's an honor that people around the world love our music and messages. It seems like there's no language barrier. We think that ARMY helped us spread our music across the world. All of this would have not been possible without ARMY.

Another theme in your music is dreams. With all the heaviness of the world today, do you think dreams help people find meaning and ambition to move forward amid uncertain times?

RM: We just hope that we can be of help. We did say that you don't have to dream, but living a life without dreams or hope would be quite dim, wouldn't it? I think everyone needs motivation and milestones in order to move. Whatever that may be, we want to be of help, even a little, for them to move forward.

So many of your dreams have come true since you'd made your debut: No. 1 albums around the world, sold-out stadium tours, Grammys and U.S. award shows, becoming the first Korean music group to perform on Saturday Night Live…What new dreams have sparked for each of you now that you have these accomplishments crossed off the list?

RM: I want to head in a straight path without losing sight of what I feel now. [I want to] keep our passion burning bright and walk straight.

Jin: I talk to Producer Bang quite often about how we should work together for a happy life. How to live happily...I think about that frequently.

Suga: I would like to have a hobby since I never had one. I would love to have a lifelong hobby.

J-Hope: To stay healthy! So that we can keep doing what we're doing now!!!

Jimin: I know that many people are cheering for us for who we are now. I think about how those people would love seeing our new, better music and performances. What I'm trying to say is, my dream is to show them more performances and better music for a long, long time.

V: They're not new dreams, but dreams that we never imagined could achieve. I'd like to keep them going.

Jungkook: I wouldn't want anything more than to keep doing music and performances just like now.

What do you hope to get better at or improve upon?

RM: Dancing! And knowing "myself."

Jin: I hope that the team always gets along and everyone is happy.

Suga: Without a question, English.

J-Hope: Our team's health! And happiness! They are the path to growth!

Jimin: I want to be good at what I am currently doing.

V: I want to widen my spectrum and become an artist who has a variety of talents.

Jungkook: If I had a chance to improve every aspect of myself, then I would work hard to make it happen rather than just sitting idly by.

Your fans, ARMY, are one of the most passionate, mobilized music fanbases in the world. How would you define what makes your fanbase so special?

BTS: It's an honor that people around the world love our music and messages. It seems like there's no language barrier. We think that ARMY helped us spread our music across the world. All of this would have not been possible without ARMY.

What music is exciting you right now? What's on your personal playlists?

RM: I'm listening to Post Malone's latest album.

Jin: Taylor Swift's “ME!" The song has a bright energy, so my mood is lifted when I listen to it. I want to try that kind of music, too.

Suga: Post Malone's “Circles."

J-Hope: I listen to older songs these days: The Fugees' “Killing Me Softly" and Cheryl Lynn's “Got to Be Real."

Jimin: I prefer songs that fill me with emotions. Nowadays, I listen to our song “Jamais Vu."

V: I'm listening to DaBaby's new album.

Jungkook: I'm listening to Jang Beom June's songs these days.

What did it mean for your album to be nominated at the 2019 Grammy Awards for Best Recording Package?

BTS: It truly was an honor. We were happy to be invited as presenters to such a big show, with such great musicians. We also became members of the Recording Academy this year. We hope to be invited to the show next year as well.

The importance and power of “loving yourself" is a cornerstone of the BTS message, in your lyrics, speeches, music videos and beyond. But when and how did the notion of self-love become something you were all so passionate about?

BTS: Our LOVE YOURSELF series bears the message that “loving yourself is the beginning of true love." The “love" that we aim to convey can be both the individual experience and a message to our society today. We once saw somewhere that “being able to love is also an ability. If you don't love yourself, you can never love anyone else." Reflecting on the ways you love yourself, we thought that this question could give the answer for many different aspects. We wanted to focus on that searching process and find the answers. [We] think LOVE YOURSELF has a positive impact. [We] also ask ourselves, “Do I really love myself?" So, [we] looked back one more time and put that notion into the lyrics.

What are the key differences in performing for audiences back home vs. elsewhere in the world?

BTS: Fans all over the world are cheering for us. We get on stage with the mindset to give them the best performance. Every occasion to meet our fans is important and meaningful.

How has social media and the Internet impacted the way you're able to reach listeners?

BTS: We like communicating with our fans. We communicated [with them online] even before our debut. Fans enjoy it and so do we. Our Weverse app was launched recently, which is a platform for our fans. We can see their messages and leave comments there. We feel that the whole world is truly connected as one through social media. Language is not a big barrier anymore, and we think that with good music, sincere messages and the effort to communicate, fans from all around the world will show their love.

What can you share about any upcoming new music?

BTS: We are currently practicing and working on new songs so we can show you the best sides of ourselves. Please look forward to it.

[doomonfilm]

Memories : Top 15 Films of 2020

If 2020 taught movie fans anything, it was that we shouldn’t take things for granted.  On the dollars and cents side of things, movie theaters were already facing an uphill battle to stay sustainable, but the “shelter-in-place” practice of March and beyond decimated box office returns, with many theaters yet to reopen (if they will open at all).  In terms of famous names and faces, the list of those who passed away featured numerous icons : Kobe Bryant, Kirk Douglas, Max von Sydow, Honor Blackman, Carl Reiner, Ennio Morricone, John Saxon, Wilford Brimley, Chadwick Boseman, Sean Connery, Tiny Lister Jr., Adolfo ‘Shabba Doo’ Quinones and many more transitioned to the great beyond.  Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Shudder and a number of other streaming services saw themselves step into the forefront of the entertainment provider realm, with Warner Brothers and a handful of other studios making announcements that they will be following suit for at least 2021, if not for good.

With all of this uncertainty and chaos, however, the year 2020 was a surprisingly strong one, in my opinion, when it came to cinematic output... so much so, in fact, that aside from a number of Honorable Mentions, my list of top films was expanded to 15 in order to accommodate all of my choices.  For anyone who has checked out my lists from previous years, you will know that I did not see every film released this year, but I did make my best effort to cover as wide a range of films as possible.  Enjoy the list, and be sure to support film in whatever medium you are able to moving forward so that it can thrive.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

The 40-Year-Old Version (dir. Radha Blank) A nice little personal film that spoke to my hip-hop sensibility, as well as that ever-present awareness of the inevitability of age, and how it can skew our perspective in regards to our achievements.

Ava (dir. Tate Taylor) This isn’t the action film that’s going to reinvent the wheel, but if you look at action films like wheels, this is a quality wheel.  Outside of Common, I couldn’t really find much to shoot down... this will definitely be one I consider the next time I have company and we’re looking for something fun to check out.

Bill & Ted Face The Music (dir. Dean Parisot) I honestly would have been satisfied with just two films in this franchise, but surprisingly, a third entry was created that didn’t ruin my overall enjoyment of the previous two films.  Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter jumped in without missing a beat, a healthy dose of familiar faces popped back up, and the new cast additions weren’t too jarring... it’s nice to know that a pair of my favorite childhood films are officially now part of a trilogy.

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (dir. Jason Woliner) This was possibly the most surprising release of 2020... outside of a couple of news blips that Sacha Baron Cohen made during production, not a lot about this film was leaked prior to its release.  For such a dated character and a seemingly outdated style of humor, Borat once again exposed the simplest parts of society in an incredibly insightful (albeit cringey as all get-out) manner.

Guns Akimbo (dir. Jason Lei Howden) One of the most fun films of 2020.  Somewhere, the creative minds behind Nerve are wishing that they’d made this film instead. 

Henrietta and Her Dismal Display of Affection (dir. Jeffrey Garcia) Jeffrey Garcia is the homie, and I’ve had the pleasure of being in a number of his short films, so when he announced his intentions to write and shoot a feature film in 2020, I was completely on-board.  Miraculously, he was able to film the movie while the world was being ravaged by COVID-19, and though I cannot publicly announce details yet, this film has definitely already met (and likely succeeded) his expectations.

The Midnight Sky (dir. George Clooney) With each film that George Clooney directs, I realize more and more than he is an old soul trapped in a body idolized by the new school of film.  That being said, it’s nice to know that there are directors out there willing to embrace patient, silent and contemplative moments while simultaneously withholding from force-feeding viewers exposition.  

Tenet (dir. Christopher Nolan) This was possibly the most anticipated release of the year, considering it was the king of the IMAX release crowd in its pre-release promotion.  After a small delay due to COVID-19, it was one of the first films released in hopes of testing the movie-going waters during what was sure to be a diminished period of time, which probably hurt its numbers.  Too many, the film was confusing, and the nit-picking was fierce from the criticism contingency, but in all honesty, this was pretty impressive Nolan fare... certainly a good second movie in a Nolan double feature.

The Trial of the Chicago 7 (dir. Aaron Sorkin) I cannot tell a lie... I was hugely impressed with how Sorkin managed to reel his personality and voice back in order to let this well-known, controversial moment in time present itself.  Sorkin has a tendency to be the star of his films, be it when he is in the writer or director role, but for this film, he managed to focus the best parts of his skillset into a highly respectful, educational and inspiring tale that fit the tumultuous summer we endured.

VHYes (dir. Jack Henry Robbins) I remember seeing this trailer as 2019 was coming to a close, and it was a film high on my list of desired viewing.  Then 2020 reared its ugly, stupid head and many releases disappeared into obscurity or found themselves delayed.  Luckily, this one slipped through the cracks and found a home in the streaming world, which in all honesty, suited its presentation very well.  One of the most delightfully weird films of the year, hands down. 

Vivarium (dir. Lorcan Finnegan) Of all the films cut from my Top 15 list, this was the toughest cut to make.  I went into the film totally blind (with Jesse Eisenberg and my respect for his acting chops being the sole selling point), but this film really hit a lot of my buttons... it’s trippy as can be, there is a character that is freakishly unique and wholly unnerving, and the production design leaves a lasting impression.  Don’t let the Honorable Mention designation fool you... this one is a winner.  

Wonder Woman 1984 (dir. Patty Jenkins) The Christmas gift that the masses collectively decided that they did not want.  Much like Ava, there is one glaring aspect of this film that I could have done without, but otherwise, I found this to be an enjoyable film.  Gal Gadot was made for this role, while Kristen Wiig and Pedro Pascal stepped up to the plate and impressed.  If you’re looking to be blown away, the Wonder Woman franchise isn’t the smartest place to go, but if you’re looking for entertainment, there’s plenty of it here.   

THE TOP 15 FILMS OF 2020

15. Mignonnes (dir. Maïmouna Doucouré) This one started off the year with plenty of controversy.  What was an award-winning tale about womanhood and the difficulties surrounding coming of age in an ever-changing and evolving world quickly devolved into a campaign to ban the film (and Netflix).  Many people overlooked the film as a cautionary tale about what access to the Internet and the sexually-charged nature in which women are portrayed can do to developing girls, instead choosing to accuse the film of being fodder for malicious types seeking to exploit the sexualizing of young women.  More than anything, in my opinion, Mignonnes served as an example of our outrage-fueled culture and the way it tends to skew our perspective and/or our ability to take art at face value.

14. His House (dir. Remi Weekes) As I’ve mentioned many times over the past week or so on this blog, horror films were one of the few genres that found a benefit from the film industry’s transition to streaming services for primary access to film.  While a number of traditional horror films received notice, His House took the opportunity to not only make a pure horror film, but one that spoke on racism and the conditions that asylum-seekers and refugees face.  The film is well-acted, the production value is high quality, and it’s paced beautifully... while not the highest film on this list, it is certainly one I will encourage others to see as time goes by.

13. All Day and a Night (dir. Joe Robert Cole) When human nature reared its ugly head during COVID-19 in the form of numerous race-related killings, multitudes of businesses quickly adopted the Black Lives Matter mantra, with film distributors and streaming services taking advantage of the moment to produce and release content relevant to cultural and social awareness.  Netflix was no different, and of the many films they released in the wake of the harrowing events, All Day and a Night is the one that feels the most sincere and honest in its approach and presentation.  The streets of Oakland are presented with a vast array of characters, each with complex backgrounds and states of mind, all of which helps the viewer understand the pressure many minorities live with and process on a daily basis.

12. She Dies Tomorrow (dir. Amy Seimetz) Execution is king, even when applied to the simplest of premises, and She Dies Tomorrow is a shining example of this.  In a very John Cassavetes move, director Amy Seimetz took her payment from her appearance in Pet Sematary and used it to fund a personal project that more than likely would have been ignored by studio heads.  The result is a hypnotic, entrancing and haunting film where stillness and anticipation play antagonist, while we as viewers feel the need to transpose ourselves into the protagonists we are presented due to their stilted but emotional performances.  Hopefully this one finds some notoriety in the cult classic realm as the years pass.

11. The Vast of Night (dir. Andrew Patterson) For a debut film, The Vast of Night handles itself with a surprising amount of confidence in its vision.  The immersion is nearly instant as we are first placed in the premise of a TV show, and then a 1950′s town, but once the actors and camera get going, it’s up to us as viewers to strap in for the ride.  The story is deeply intriguing, the performances are strong enough to carry a very dialogue heavy movie, and the final act is chilling in its reveals.  I will be surprised if this one finds its way to a Best Original Screenplay nomination due to it being a debut film from a relatively unknown writer/director, but if it manages to get the nomination it will certainly be a well-deserved one.

10. Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (dir. Cathy Yan) The movie that broke the list.  If someone would have told me in 2019 that a film directly connected to Suicide Squad would be anywhere on a Top Films list I curated, I would have laughed dead in their face, and yet, here we are.  It’s like every good idea that was poorly executed in Suicide Squad found new life in Birds of Prey, which makes the film not only an entertaining watch, but a satisfying one.  Not only is Margot Robbie perfect in this film (as well as given a break on the exploitative costuming), but Mary Elizabeth Winstead arguably takes a stab at stealing the show with her performance.  Don’t let the DCEU association fool you... Birds of Prey is the real deal.    

9. Never Rarely Sometimes Always (dir. Eliza Hittman) Probably the most contemplative film on the entire list, and impressive in its nature for sure.  To my knowledge, the cast is made up of mostly unknowns (unless I’m sleeping on actors and actresses, which has been known to happen), and as a result, a tough slice of life to swallow is presented in an extremely grounded nature.  Sidney Flanigan gives a powerful performance, hopefully the first of many.

8. Possessor [Uncut] (dir. Brandon Cronenberg) Easily the most “what the f-ck” film on this list, and certainly one worthy of the Cronenberg name.  Andrea Riseborough has been on my radar since Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) and Mandy, and seeing her in a lead role confirms her talent.  I’m a sucker for science-fiction films that don’t rely on digital effects and elaborate set pieces, and Possessor rings both of those bells with a vengeance.  I watched the uncut version, which has a couple of extremely brutal sequences that will unnerve even the most hardened viewer, but these sequences only serve to drive home the lost nature of Tasya, our protagonist.  This one isn’t for everyone, but for those who can stomach a bit off graphicness and process a narrative that doesn’t spoon-feed you answers, this one is a must see.

7. Da 5 Bloods (dir. Spike Lee) Spike Lee has always been a huge influence on me as both an aspiring filmmaker and a fan of the medium, but I’d be lying if I told you that his last decade was a memorable one.  Outside of BlacKkKlansman, Lee has found himself falling short of his vision more often than not, but Da 5 Bloods is a tonal and stylistic bullseye.  Fans of Lee will dig it, fans of Vietnam films will dig it, and anyone who had an inkling of respect or admiration for Chadwick Boseman will be moved.  If Lee continues to make films as good as this one, he may find an entirely new generation of fans as a result.

6. Soul (dir. Pete Docter) As mentioned at the top of this list, people love to try and sink films due to their own personal agendas, and Soul found itself in the crosshairs prior to its late 2020 release.  Many people were upset that a minority character would not only spend most of the movie as a blue blob, but would also seemingly serve as a tool for another character’s “salvation”.  That being said, once Soul dropped, anybody with common sense dropped those stances and realized that Pixar had not only made a stunningly beautiful film, but one that likely spoke to adults more than children.  Plain and simple, Soul is a bonafide instant classic.

5. Kajillionaire (dir. Miranda July) If Evan Rachel Wood doesn’t win an Oscar for her performance in Kajillionaire (or at least garner a nomination), Hollywood needs to collectively have their head checked.  Every year worth its salt has a weird, quirky but loveable film, and Miranda July more than succeeded in making one for 2020.  The humor, both physical and dialogue-based, is on point, and the bittersweet nature of the story is gut-wrenching as the film progresses.  This one was probably the biggest surprise for 2020 in terms of prior awareness versus post-watch admiration.

4. Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom (dir. George C. Wolfe) The final film of Chadwick Boseman’s short but prolific career is one that allowed him to exist in the wake of his reality, making his performance powerful and (seemingly) cathartic.  He is surrounded by supreme talent on all sides, as there are no weak performances in this film, and despite it essentially being a play shot for film, it feels far from limited, contained or constrained.  Not only does it speak on larger issues of the commodification of Black pain and talent, but it may serve as a vehicle for a posthumous Oscar for Boseman.

3. The Devil All The Time (dir. Antonio Campos) This was the first Netflix original that made me really and truly respect them as a film distributor.  The list of talent for The Devil All The Time is truly impressive, and Tom Holland knocked his lead role out of the park.  Robert Pattinson is great as always, and the way that the story winds back into itself keeps you locked in and connected until the credits roll.  For something that came out so many months ago, it’s respectable that it was able to hold such a high position on a list that was as fluid as any I’ve ever put together.

2. Mank (dir. David Fincher) For a time, this was the hands down film of the year on my list.  Gary Oldman has basically become a “can do no wrong” actor, and his performance was amplified by David Fincher’s ability to emulate the look, sound and feel of a bygone Hollywood era.  On top of this, the built in intrigue that comes with handling anything remotely connected to Orson Welles is present, making Mank almost feel like a companion piece to the prolific film that is Citizen Kane.  If The Devil All The Time was a victory for Netflix, then Mank was the win that put them into a true spot as contenders in the future of film distribution. 

1. I'm Thinking of Ending Things (dir. Charlie Kaufman) Where does one even begin with Charlie Kaufman?  Time and again, he proves to be one of the most truly unique voices to gain fame.  For I’m Thinking of Ending Things, Kaufman seemingly returns to his foundation of odd, offbeat love stories, only to take us on a journey of truly mind-bending and psyche-warping proportions.  Of all the movies on this list, this is the one that almost demands repeat viewings, as one must have an idea of the entire journey before they can understand the individual aspects laid out.  If dialogue isn’t your thing, then this one may not hold you, but that would be a shame, as this beautiful mystery stands head and shoulders above the rest of 2020′s stellar output.

[ivyonna10]

Kate McKinnon

Kathryn McKinnon Berthold is notable as an American entertainer, comic, and essayist who is known for her character work and big name impressions. 

Individual Life 

Kate McKinnon Berthold was brought into the world on January 6, 1984, in Sea Cliff, New York as an offspring of Laura Campbell and Michael Berthold. McKinnon's mom, Laura, was a parent teacher, and her dad, Thomas Berthold, was a designer. As a kin, she has a delightful more youthful sister Emily Lynne, a Comedian who went through their adolescence with so much fun and love. She had likewise worked with her sister in the Podcast arrangement "Heads Will Roll" and the advanced arrangement "Legal official Publix." 

At the point when she was 18 years of age, her dad was kicked the bucket, which turned into the most exceedingly terrible day of their life. Afterward, she uncovered that she is a lesbian. She likewise got the feline Nino Positano, which is the pizza station's name where she had found. She used to call her feline her child, where her affection for feline makes her discover more ideas to her working profession. 

Identity and Physical Stats 

Kate McKinnon holds the American ethnicity, where she has a German and Scottish plunge. She is presently 36 years of age as a fruitful lady. She is 5 feet 4 inches (1.61m) tall, and her weight is 50 kg. Her body estimation is 34-26-35 inches and had a light hair tone with blue eye tone. She was brought into the world on January sixth, so her zodiac sign is Capricorn. 

Relationship 

Kate McKinnon expressed that she was a lesbian, and previously, she was involved with a picture taker and known as an entertainer Jackie Abbott. She had likewise communicated her sentiments about being a person, and she additionally expressed gratitude toward Ellen DeGeneres for her help, which made her simple to acknowledge reality and her sexual direction at the 77th Golden Globe Award, which was in 2020. Being a lesbian isn't simple, she needed to support her sentiments to her folks and society, however she could do that. Afterward, she was involved with Bari Weiss, and now she was involved with Jackie Abbott. 

Early Life and Education 

Kate McKinnon used to play the instruments in her youth, and she likewise began to play the piano when she just five years of age. At the point when it transformed into 12 years, he played the cello and figured out how to play the guitar when she was 15 years of age. At the point when she was in her fifth grade, she took an interest in the tryout to turn into the perusing week's sovereign, where she utilized English pronunciations. Afterward, she talked with "Drifter," where she expressed that she began her existence with a grin, which is consistently a direct result of doing the British articulations. 

In 2002, Kate McKinnon moved on from the North Shore High School. Afterward, in 2006, she moved on from Columbia University with a degree in the theater. She had likewise helped to establish the Tea Party parody gathering, which centers around the melodic comedy satire. She had additionally found the opportunity to participate in three Varsity shows like "V109 Dial D for Deadline", "V110 Off-Broadway", "V111 The sound of Muses". Around then, she was likewise used to be important for Prangstgrup, a parody gathering. 

Profession 

Kate McKinnon was cast to Logo TV's in 2007 to "The Big Gay Sketch Show" where she worked for three seasons. Afterward, she routinely played out the live sketch satire in the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater in New York City. From that point onward, she was likewise considered attempting to be a voice-over entertainer where she gave her voice in the arrangement like The Venture Bros, Lobotomy, and Ugly Americans. 

She was additionally found in the Kennedy Center Honors to be the piece of an accolade for Lily Tomlin in 2014, who is an entertainer, artist, humorist, essayist, and maker. At that point, she was found in the reboot "Ghostbusters "in 2016, and in 2017 she was seen in Amblin Entertainment's Lunch Witch, a novel variation of youthful grown-up illustrations by Deb Lucke. 

From that point onward, Kate McKinnon gave her voice in the few arrangement which incorporates "The Simpsons" as a Hettie, "Family Guy" as Karen or Heavy stream, and furthermore in the films like "Discovering Dory" in the part of Stan's fish spouse, "The Angry Birds Movie," in the function of Stella or Eva the Birthday Mom and the film "Ferdinand" as a Lupe. She additionally gave her voice to Mrs. Frizzle's function in the energized youngsters arrangement "Wizardry School Bus" and in PBS Kids TV arrangement Nature Cat as a Squeeks. 

Kate McKinnon was broadly notable for her character work and turned into the VIP impressions of the pop artist Justin Bieber, Ellen DeGeneres, Hillary Clinton, Rudy Ginsburg, and some more. 

Saturday Night Live 

On April 7, 2012, Kate McKinnon went to the cast of Saturday Night Live, and on March 28, 2012, she was employed then elevated to the repertory status in season 39 of every 2013. She got loads of grants for her remarkable execution and contemplations, which were her best minutes for her profession. Moreover, she had been found in the arrangement "2016 official political decision" as a Hillary Clinton, where she had assumed the lead job. 

At the point when the genuine Clinton was found in the show's season 41 debut, McKinnon communicated about Hillary Clinton, where she portrayed that Clinton has a profound reverence. There is no uncertainty that she needed to win the political decision. In any case, on November 12, 2016, Clinton couldn't win. Afterward, she rehashed her function to begin the show just wilt an independent presentation, which was known as "Glory be." 

Work as Creator 

McKinnon has additionally functioned as co-made and co-stars with her sister in the web arrangement "Legal official Publix." They have likewise made the dream parody Audible sound arrangement "Head Will Roll" and debuted in May 2019. 

Other Work 

She has additionally found in a few ads for the Ford Focus in 2015 and co-facilitated the 31st Independent Spirit Awards with Kumail Nanjiani in 2016, where she was likewise found in the supporting part in the film "Yesterday" in 2019. 

Accomplishment 

Kate McKinnon was assigned for seven Primetime Emmy Awards, which additionally comprises of six for the Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series, and one was for Outstanding Original Music and Lyrics, which was won by her in 2016 and 2017. Likewise, in the time of 2013, she was named for an Emmy Award, which is for the best-supporting entertainer, Comedy and she had the option to win the American Comedy Award for best-supporting Actress in 2014 where she was additionally named for the Emmy Award for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series. In the exact year, she was likewise assigned for Outstanding Original Music and Lyrics. 

What's more, for the subsequent time, Kate McKinnon was selected for the Emmy, which for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series in 2015. She was likewise ready to turn into the principal entertainer to win the honor since it was in 1993 Dana Carvey was granted. 

Total assets 

The assessed total assets of Kate McKinnon is $8 million.

[markharmonparadise]

Football 5/16/2019 9:59:00 AM

Mark Harmon Named 2019 NFF Gold Medal Recipient

On Dec. 10, the NFF will present its highest honor to Harmon in recognition of his roots as a football scholar-athlete and subsequent accomplishments as a leader in the field of entertainment. IRVING, Texas (May 16, 2019) – The National Football Foundation (NFF) & College Hall of Fame announced today that former UCLA quarterback Mark Harmon has been named the 2019 recipient of the NFF Gold Medal in recognition of his exceptional accomplishments, unblemished reputation and for reflecting the values of amateur football. He will be honored for his achievements during the 62nd NFF Annual Awards Dinner on Dec. 10 at the New York Hilton Midtown in New York City, which will also celebrate the 150th anniversary of college Football.

"As we prepare to celebrate the 150th anniversary of college football, Mark Harmon captures exactly what we hope to inspire in future generations of young football players, making him the perfect recipient for the NFF's highest honor," said NFF President & CEO Steve Hatchell. "An NFF National Scholar-Athlete at UCLA in the early 1970s, Mark took that same relentless drive to succeed, applying it to his career as an actor and unequivocally becoming one of the most successful stars of his generation. He has earned this honor many times over, and we are extremely proud to add his name to the esteemed list of past NFF Gold Medal recipients."

The highest and most prestigious award presented by the National Football Foundation, the Gold Medal recognizes an outstanding American who has demonstrated integrity and honesty; achieved significant career success; and has reflected the basic values of those who have excelled in amateur sport, particularly football. First presented to President Dwight D. Eisenhower at the NFF Annual Awards Dinner in 1958, the Gold Medal boasts an impressive list of past recipients, including seven presidents, four generals, three admirals, one Supreme Court Justice, 29 corporate CEOs and chairmen, actor John Wayne and baseball immortal Jackie Robinson. Harmon will become the 65th recipient of the NFF Gold Medal. (See below for the full list of past recipients.)

"Having achieved the highest levels of success, Mark Harmon has always remained humble and focused on the things that really matter in life, which is hard work, perseverance and teamwork," said NFF Awards Committee Chairman Jack Ford. "His success on the gridiron as a student-athlete and his subsequent icon status in film and television make him exceptionally well-qualified as our 2019 Gold Medal recipient. We look forward to welcoming him back to the NFF's stage in December, poetically 46 years after his being honored as an NFF National Scholar-Athlete during an event when another famous actor, John Wayne, accepted the NFF Gold Medal."

Harmon was born and raised in Southern California; the son of actress Elyse Knox and Heisman Trophy winner Tom Harmon, a 1954 College Football Hall of Fame inductee from Michigan. He attended The Harvard School (now known as Harvard-Westlake) in Los Angeles, playing football, baseball and rugby. On the gridiron, he mostly took the field as a running back and safety, only appearing in four games at quarterback. He broke his elbow as a junior, and did not play varsity football as a senior. 

Not recruited out of high school, Harmon headed to Pierce Junior College in Woodland Hills, California, and he quarterbacked the team to a 7-2 record in 1971, earning All-America laurels. His performance earned him multiple scholarship offers, including Oklahoma in an effort led by Barry Switzer, the offensive coordinator at the time and a future College Football Hall of Fame coach, to recruit him. Harmon opted to stay in his hometown of Los Angeles, playing for UCLA head coach Pepper Rodgers and assistant coaches Homer Smith, Lynn Stiles and Terry Donahue, also a future College Football Hall of Fame coach.

Playing alongside future College Football Hall of Fame inductees Randy Cross and John Sciarra, Harmon helped orchestrate a UCLA turnaround, quarterbacking the Bruins, which had finished 2-7-1 at eighth-place in the Pac-8 in 1971, to a combined 17-5 record in 1972 and 1973. In his first game ever as a Bruin, which opened the 1972 season, Harmon led an underdog UCLA to a dramatic 20-17 win against two-time defending national champion Nebraska, snapping the Huskers' 32-game-unbeaten streak.   A Wishbone-T quarterback who could run, pass, fake and mix plays, Harmon rushed for more yards and touchdowns than he did passing, amassing 1,504 yards rushing and 14 touchdowns versus passing for 845 yards and 9 touchdowns during his tenure in Westwood. The offensive coordinator Homer Smith's wishbone offense forced Harmon to make multiple decisions in very short time periods, distributing the ball to running backs Kermit Johnson and James McAlister. The combination created the top running game in the nation in 1973, and UCLA set school records for total yards gained (4,403), average yards per game (400) and rushing touchdowns (56).   A Communications major who aspired to become a doctor, Harmon excelled in the UCLA classrooms, carrying a 3.45 GPA and graduating cum laude. His accomplishments earned him Second Team CoSIDA Academic All-America honors as well as an NFF National Scholar-Athlete Award, which led to his trip to New York City where he was honored at the NFF Annual Awards Dinner the same night that John Wayne accepted the NFF Gold Medal.   "In today's society, the scholar-athlete is indeed a rare breed," Harmon said in responding for the NFF Scholar-Athlete Class in 1973. "Not only does he excel on the field, but he competes in the classroom as well…. As we gather here tonight to pay our respects to the men who made the great American game of football what it is today, we hope that one day in the future some of us from the Class of '74 might be fortunate enough to carry on the great tradition that has been passed down by the distinguished men in this room. If we do, it is because our universities gave us the chance and the game of football has given us the principles."   After UCLA, Harmon declined professional football offers to instead pursue acting. He worked in advertising, as a shoe company rep and as a carpenter between acting gigs and appearing in Coors beer commercials. His hard work eventually paid off with a big break on NBC's St. Elsewhere and the leading role of Dr. Robert Caldwell. His success continued on NBC's police drama Reasonable Doubts starring as detective Dickey Cobb and CBS's Chicago Hope where he appeared as Dr. Jack McNeil.   He also had memorable arcs on the hit shows Moonlighting and The West Wing before landing the lead role of Leroy Jethro Gibbs, a special agent with the Naval Criminal Investigative Service, on CBS' global favorite NCIS series, which has become part of television history, approaching its 400th episode and recently inking a deal for its 17th season. The most-watched-scripted show on American television today and consistently ranked among the five highest-rated TV shows each year, NCIS is a TV juggernaut, attracting more than 15 million viewers each week throughout most of its run.   In 2011, Harmon became an executive producer on NCIS, and in 2014 an idea he co-developed became the spinoff NCIS: New Orleans which premiered on CBS with Harmon as an executive producer alongside Gary Glasberg. His big-screen credits include Freaky Friday, Wyatt Earp, The Presidio, Summer School and Stealing Home. He has worked with Elizabeth Taylor, Michael Caine, Sean Connery, Jamie Lee Curtis, Jodie Foster, Allison Janney, Karl Malden, Patricia Arquette and Denzel Washington among countless other Hollywood notables.   Harmon has received numerous accolades and award nominations during his career, including being honored with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on Oct. 1, 2012, but he has always remained humble with an appreciation for the efforts of others. Quietly giving back, Harmon's charitable work includes Saving Bristol Bay, Stand Up To Cancer, Ronald McDonald House Charities, Kids Wish Network, Clothes Off Our Back, Entertainment Industry Foundation, Oklahoma Kidz Charities Foundation, Oklahoma City Indian Clinic and The Children's Center OKC.   From his time as a quarterback at UCLA until now, as an executive producer and star of the CBS hit series NCIS, Harmon has always treated teammates and production crews with familial respect and loyalty. "I look at the show as a team," Harmon said during a previous interview. "I've always been a team guy. I'm not in [acting] for the personal part of this, and I wasn't as an athlete either. It's about the work and we all work together."   Harmon will be honored during the 62nd NFF Annual Awards Dinner on Dec. 10 at the New York Hilton Midtown in New York City. Harmon will accept his award alongside the yet-to-be-announced recipients of the NFF Outstanding Contribution to Amateur Football Award, NFF John L. Toner Award for excellence in athletics administration and NFF Chris Schenkel Award for excellence in broadcasting.   In addition to the presentation of the NFF Major Awards, the 62nd NFF Annual Awards Dinner will provide the stage for the induction of the 2019 College Football Hall of Fame Class; the presentation of the 2019 NFF National Scholar-Athlete Awards; and the bestowing of the 30th NFF William V. Campbell Trophy® to the nation's top football scholar-athlete.   The 2019 College Football Hall of Fame Class includes Terrell Buckley (Florida State), Rickey Dixon (Oklahoma), London Fletcher (John Carroll [OH]), Jacob Green (Texas A&M), Torry Holt (North Carolina State), Raghib "Rocket" Ismail (Notre Dame), Darren McFadden (Arkansas), Jake Plummer (Arizona State), Troy Polamalu (Southern California), Joe Thomas (Wisconsin), Lorenzo White (Michigan State), Patrick Willis (Mississippi), Vince Young (Texas) and coaches Dennis Erickson (Idaho, Wyoming, Washington State, Miami [FL], Oregon State, Arizona State) and Joe Taylor (Howard, Virginia Union, Hampton, Florida A&M).   On Oct. 30, the NFF will announce the members of the 2019 NFF National Scholar-Athlete Class, who will vie as finalists for The William V. Campbell Trophy®. They will be honored at the NFF Annual Awards Dinner on Dec. 10, where one will be named the recipient of the Campbell Trophy® as the nation's top football scholar-athlete.   For ticket information at the 62nd NFF Annual Awards Dinner, please contact Will Rudd at 972.556.1000 or wrudd@footballfoundation.com.

Recipients of the NFF Gold Medal include:

2019 – Mark Harmon 2018 – Aaron Feis 2018 – Jason Seaman 2016 – Archie Manning 2015 – Dr. Condoleezza Rice 2014 – Dr. Tom G. Catena 2014 – George M. Weiss 2013 – Roger Goodell 2012 – Roscoe C. Brown, Jr. 2011 – Robert M. Gates 2009 – Bill Bowerman 2009 – Phil Knight 2008 – Sen. John Glenn 2007 – Gen. Pete Dawkins 2007 – Roger Staubach 2006 – Bobby Bowden 2006 – Joseph V. Paterno  2005 – Jon F. Hanson 2004 – William V. Campbell 2003 – Gen. Tommy R. Franks 2002 – George Steinbrenner III 2001 – Billy Joe "Red" McCombs 2000 – F.M. Kirby 1999 – Keith Jackson 1998 – John H. McConnell 1997 – Jackie Robinson 1996 – Eugene F. Corrigan 1995 – Harold Alfond 1994 – Thomas S. Murphy 1993 – Gen. Norman Schwarzkopf 1992 – Donald R. Keough 1991 – Pres. George H. Bush 1990 – Adm. Thomas H. Moorer 1989 – Paul Brown 1988 – Clinton E. Frank 1987 – Gen. Charles R. Meyer 1986 – William H. Morton 1985 – William I. Spencer 1984 – John F. McGillicuddy 1983 – Sen. Jack Kemp 1982 – Silver Anniversary (All Past Honorees Recognized) 1981 – Justin W. Dart 1980 – Walter J. Zable 1979 – Adm. William P. Lawrence 1978 – Vincent dePaul Draddy 1977 – Gen. Louis H. Wilson 1976 – Edgar B. Speer 1975 – David Packard 1974 – Gerald B. Zornow 1973 – John Wayne 1972 – Pres. Gerald R. Ford 1971 – Pres. Ronald W. Reagan 1970 – Adm. Thomas J. Hamilton 1969 – Pres. Richard M. Nixon 1968 – Chester J. LaRoche 1967 – Frederick L. Hovde 1966 – Earl H. "Red" Blaik  1965 – Juan T. Trippe 1964 – Donold B. Lourie 1963 – Roger M. Blough 1962 – Byron "Whizzer" White 1961 – Pres. John F. Kennedy 1960 – Pres. Herbert C. Hoover 1960 – Amos Alonzo Stagg 1959 – Gen. Douglas A. MacArthur 1958 – Pres. Dwight D. Eisenhower

[storyofmyownlife]

End of The Decade

I started this about 9 years ago for a very simple reason-I was hooked on the tv show called Akward. Jenna, the main protagonist of the show, likes to write blogs about her life as a way to cope and express how she feels. Awe inspired, I decided to create my own anonymous blog with the hopes that cathartic venting and documenting the past can help me navigate the present. For the last couple if years, l had been given many opportunities to taste the bittersweet feelings of life. Truth to be told, I have never thought I would be here writing this blog to end the decade. The earlier entries can attest to this. Ten years a go my life was in shambles. I had a broken family, broken English, and the broken will to live.

My father, two siblings and I arrived in Canada on April of 2009 to finally live with my mom. With little regards of the past, I cherished the brand new start to live a life without prejudice. I felt very little emotion when I left the Philippines because I knew deep down I could finally escape the invalidation of others of how I suppose to love. Of course, then, I was naive to think that I wouldn't felt that way ever again- I was completely wrong. It did not take long before everything start to turn sour. Us siblings did not get a long. We did not group together and we did not know how to live with one another. My mom and dad started to fight a lot. Almost every night. My dad started drinking a lot for many reasons that I know now and understood, but not completely forgiven. He misses his old life back in his home country- the life of the party and his other family. My mom push him to work and help with bills. Just like my sister and my brother and I, My mom and dad did live apart for many years. The feeling of living with my whole family was foreign to me. A month after arrival, the incident happened. The police came and for many months the social worker came and visit us. The resentment between us siblings began to build up. For many months, my brother and I blamed my sister for telling the truth. Knowing what I knew now she did the right thing. Nevertheless, my brother and I alienated her.

I also had broken English. I did not make a lot of friends in Grade 8. I was that loner kid who would spend every day during lunch alone and would walk on the school ground by himself. My sister and my brother got their own friends. I wanted to make my own but couldnt. On the bright side, my brother became friends with the guy name Denver. He is one of the only few people in our lives who never left for the past decade. He is still with us.

I started high school. I made more friends who are Filipino. We all kind of form this group. Denver is also part of it. Within that inner group, we had more inner clique called cajibo. I'm not going to disclose who they are because I no longer associate myself with them and it does not matter. There were also four girls who called themselves kimfejeny and they became part of the inner group. Regardless of what happened in the end, they taught me a lot of things about life. For the first time, they made me feel what is like to find a family in a group of random strangers. I must admit they helped us work throughout with some of the traumas. We had crazy dreams together, we spent so many adventures together, and they taught me the life is not as simple as black and white. It all ended because I cared too much and told the truth when it was not my place to do so. Inspite of if all, there were some silver linings to it.

I worked hard to improve my english and move in advance english. My ESL teacher helped me a lot. I improved my academic performance in no time. I also began to developed new relationships. My brother and I became more close to Daniel, Alen, Kith, and Alden. I also began to listen to Taylor Swift's music. She did help me cope with unreciprocated love, broken hearts, and the unpredictability of life. I swear I had crush on couple of people at my high school. I'm just gonna name them here for memories sake- adam, alden, aiah, and andrew.

As time went by, I started thinking about my future. After taking few courses, I knew that I have a passion for literature and history. During my junior and senior years, I took classes in philosophy, history, and law. I was no good in math. Science was okay. I actually got the biology award college level and made it to the honor roll in grade 11 and 12.

In my senior year, this girl name Chelsea asked me out to go to the prom with her. I tagged a long with her friends. They were also friends kimfejeny and some members of cajibo. It was an okay time. I didnt really have an ecstatic time. Suffice to say, I got to go so it was a check for one of my bucket list. Since I'm on the subject, I also went to Red tour concert instead of going to my own school prom. Ed Sheeran performed with Taylor swift! They were both great. Another item checked off!

On my last year, I was also determined to move out. My mom was very supportive of it. We started to look for school. I got in to all of the ones that I applied to. I was torn between u of t and Mac. To be honest, I would not have considered or let alone knew about mcmaster if it wasn't for Andrew. I visited both schools. I thought that u of t provide more classes and opportunities for what I wanted to do. But, I wanted to have an experience like those in movies. Also, deep down I wanted to run away in hope that I could find myself and be. I decided to go to mac

My brother and I graduated. I said goodbye to my favorite high school teach who gave my brother and I a gift. But she did not need to because she has already given me so much and more. The summer was filled with excitement and anticipation. I held a get together before I leave for college. I said goodbye to my friends and left a note for my brother to read. There were crying involve because I felt that I did not deserve them at all. They were so good to me and I was not in return. That summer was bittersweet.

I started my university experience. I would not go in a lot of details because I pretty much documented my first year here well enough. Grace, Shane, nicole and devone made a difference in life, especially Grace. She saved me from myself.

In second year, it was interesting because it started off as bad. I was seeing this guy and wanted to be with him but couldnt. I also was very insecure about myself and my sexuality. Everyone went on dates, make out with someone at the party, etc. I risked my life a couple of times in pursuit of getting the same experience. With the help of my friend and after going to group support, I got through it all. I started joining clubs: board games society, humanities,etc.

Devon came back. Turns out he is bi. I've always liked and wanted him. I had wanted his approval but It was an impossible task. He was drunk and toxic. He liked one of my roommate to who kind of like him too, but did know it was right. She was also the only person who knew about my feelings towards him. Suffice to say my relationship with Devon was severed after the end of that year. Shane was also a drunk and feel like he would not approve of my sexuality so I cut my relationship with him slowly.

I also started dating someone name T. It was an okay relationship. He was a really good guy but I don't think we were meant for each other. I loved how he held me, but I knew I was not the one for him. I was not a good boyfriend to him. I think I tried to look for things in him that I want from my partner. Older, and hopefully wiser, know now that it was wrong. I ended it.

I had great times with my friends and old roommates. Spontaneous drives, adventures, and they gave me opportunities to experience things I never experienced before. Like going to demetris, hiking to trails and falls, random trips to McDonalds etc. Alicia also became my support on my last year at mac. I also became hers as well.

When graduated, I did not find a job immediately and was kind of down. I started to work out to motivate myself. I lost about 75 pound in a couple of months. With the help of family friends, I got hired at a law firm. I learned a lot of things from there. What it's like to practice law, experience to use office equipments, how to network, etc. The perks were great. But the coworkers and the work are not as great. Couple of coworkers come and go. 2 years and a half I still work with them. I also met Ashley, Selena, clarice, bryce, mike. Fun fact: Ashley's wedding was the first wedding that I attended that was not affiliated with my family.

A year ago, I woke up one day and decided to apply to post grad HR program. I was supposed to apply right after I graduated university but I knew I needed to take some time off. But, that day, I was determined to start a new. I got in to the program but was not able to start until last january. The program taught me so much about myself and others. I worked like I've never work in my life. In the end, I got 3.64 GPA. I've made friends and enemies.

My friends from high school that I mentioned before are still with me to this very day. We've gone through so many late night adventures together! I finished my internship last week and I now work as a full time employee at COC. I've traveled couple of times outside Canada for the past 2 years.My family and I recently went to punta Cana. I'm hoping to go to either Mexico or California next year!. I know in my last post I may have mentioned my struggle with the changing times. I know everyone in my life is starting to build their own life without me and that's okay. It is part of growing up. I'm also having short term memory lost lately but hopefully I get better. I'm hoping that my friendship with mike and Bryce would last longer. I wish my family the best in this new decade.

They say, life gets tougher as you grow older. My hope is I became tougher and more resilient still. I will ride the every changing tides of time while always looking up to the daylight.

I'll tell you the truth but never goodbye.

December 31st, 2019

Ps: pic 1 shows the books that I accumulated and read over the years. Pic 2 my favorite things the I received and owned this year.

[robinsoncenter]

[Qsc_asuw] Week 9 Newsletter

Welcome to Week Nine! <3 

QTBIPOC Artist        Spotlight of the Week: 

Gabriella Grimes is a 23 year old        queer artist from New York City. Under the handle ggggrimes, their work        focuses on portraying people of color, many of whom are queer. One of        ggggrimes’ goals is challenging common perceptions of race, gender, and        sexuality in the western world. They want their viewers to question        society’s rigid views of the gender binary, and why individuals expect        artists to adhere to this binary.

ggggrimes is inspired by queer        predecessors and current activists to help young queer people        understand that they’re valid and their existence is important.        Similarly, they acknowledge the humanity of people of color in their        artwork, showing them hurting, healing, and simply living happily.        Buy their art here! 

The Queer & Trans People of        Color Alliance (QTPOCA) will be        meeting this Friday in the ECC Asian room! 

The SEED Scholarship is due this Friday, March 8th!      

This             scholarship is open to any undocumented student who will be             attending UW during the 2019-2020 academic year. The application             will close on March 8th, 2019 at 11:59 PM. If you have any             questions please email asuwraza@uw.edu       

Here is the application link:         http://tinyurl.com/Seedscholarship2019

               MESC & SARVA        #MeToo in the Middle East        (Tuesday, March 5,        2019) 4 PM - 5 PM @ Husky Union Building Room        340     

Join             Menosh, a Clinical Social Worker, Mental Health Therapist, and the             previous Director of the Sexual Assault and Relationship Violence             Activists. We will be having a warm and intimate discussion with             other Middle Eastern and Muslim women about issues relating to #MeToo.       

ACCESSIBILITY INFORMATION:       

Event             venue is mobility aid accessible, the HUB’s front entrance is             wheelchair accessible.

        An             all-genders restroom can be found on the 3rd floor, down the             hallway from the Q Center. Gender binary bathrooms with multiple             stalls can be found on each floor of the HUB.

        The             Husky Union Building is near landmarks such as Allen Library,             Padelford and Sieg. For a map, search HUB on the campus             maps: http://www.washington.edu/maps/.

        The             HUB is not kept scent-free, but we ask that you do not wear scented/fragranced             products (e.g. perfume, hair products) or essential oils to/in the             event in order to make the space accessible to those with chemical             injury or multiple chemical sensitivity.

Alchemy Poetry        featuring Ben Yisrael and Ebo Barton

(Tuesday, March 5, 2019) 7 PM -        8:00 PM @ Alchemy Poetry 

1408 E Pike        Street, Seattle, Washington 98122                Join us at Lovecitylove for our 5th installment of the series on        Tuesday, March 5th, 2019        featuring Ben Yisrael and Ebo Barton!

Alchemy is a curated performance art space that elevates        voices that are often silenced. Performers in our community focus on        the brilliance of storytelling by offering personal stories and        reflections that are socially relevant. We are powerful artists and our        space allows our audience to witness the craft at its highest form. We        believe that art is a divine power to create community.                $5 Admission        ALL AGES        Limited        Showcase Mic Spots                Every first, third and sometimes fifth Tuesday of the month        at 7pm, we call on two featured performers and a showcase mic at        Lovecitylove.                ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:       

Entry             door to LoveCityLove is at least 32 inches wide

        Restroom             is single stall. 

        There             is a grab bar installed in this restroom, clearance measures             TBD. 

        There             are 2 couches, and 20 folding chairs available in the space. We             ask that the audience prioritize folks that need to be seated             during the show. 

        Parking             is paid street parking, or there is a paid lot on the east side of             the building. 

        We             are located near bus routes 11,12, and 2 and 0.4 miles away from             the Broadway and Pike Streetcar stop

         Dean Spade: Fighting to Win! Critical Queer & Trans Politics in Scary Times        (Tuesday, March 5,        2019) 6 PM - 7:30 PM @ Washington State History Museum        1911 Pacific Ave, Tacoma, Washington 98402      

Join             us to hear Dean Spade - trans activist, writer and teacher -             discuss trans liberation. For more information, please call (253)             383-2318.       

ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:        The Washington State History Museum is wheelchair accessible.

The _ Monologues Art        Festival Auditions, All Art Forms Welcome!        (Thursday, March 7,        2019) 12 PM - 7 PM @ ASUW Womxn's Action Commission Office                AN OPEN CALL FOR STORIES, TRUTHS, AND VOICES IN ALL ART FORMS as a part        of the production previously known the Vagina Monologues, which this        year we proudly present as: The Monologues Art Festival!     

Please             go to our website to fill this form for participating in the             auditions or submitting the different art forms: http://women.asuw.org/

        Join             us on March 7th and 8th, any time between 12:00 pm - 7:00 pm to             share with the Womxn's Action Commission your spoken poetry and             artistic talents, so you can be part of this year's The __             Monologues Art Festival!     

About The __ Monologues Art Festival:                - It will take place on April 15th, 16th and 19th at the Intellectual        House, and it will consist of a production that centers the experiences        of womxn, trans*, gender non-conforming and genderqueer folks through        two nights of spoken poetry/Monologues, and one final night (the art        festival!) where all art forms will be displayed in a gallery/show        event. - The festival will also include artisan vendors from local        communities!                - It doesn't matter if your work is still in progress, if you have        never done this before... this is a supportive space where your        stories, creative processes and truths will be honored, and where you        will have the chance to meet other artists and build future projects        with them.                About the Audition Process:                The Womxn's Action Commission team members will be at our office with        welcoming beverages and a supportive environment: Here, you can share        with us your spoken work/monologue work, as well as share your other        art forms.                - We will notify you of the next steps during the following week, and        schedule 101 meetings with each participant, so we can start walking        through the event.                - Our audition/art submission form is coming very soon! so please keep        an eye on this page and submit your responses as soon as possible.

       The 2nd Annual Lee        Scheingold Lecture in Poetry and Poetics @ Walker Ames Room (Kane Hall) Kane 225        Red Square (University Of Washington), Seattle, Washington 98105        (Thursday March        7, 2019) 5:30 - 8:45 PM)         

The Lee Scheingold Lecture in        Poetry and Poetics is thrilled to welcome Dr. Leanne Betasamosake        Simpson and Dr. Alexis Pauline Gumbs to the University of Washington on        Thursday, March 7, 2019. A reception will be held from 5:30-6:30 in the        Walker-Ames Room in Kane Hall. From 7:00-8:15, Dr. Simpson and Dr.        Gumbs will each share a short talk on poetry, poetics, and social        justice, and then will be in conversation in Room 220 in Kane Hall. A        book signing will follow. This lecture is hosted by the UW English        Department and is made possible through the generous support of Lee        Scheingold. Free and open to the public.

         Leanne              Betasamosake Simpson is a renowned Michi Saagiig Nishnaabeg              scholar, writer and artist, who has been widely recognized as one              of the most compelling Indigenous voices of her generation. Her              work breaks open the intersections between politics, story and              song—bringing audiences into a rich and layered world of sound,              light, and sovereign creativity.

         Working              for over a decade as an independent scholar using Nishnaabeg              intellectual practices, Leanne has lectured and taught              extensively at universities across Canada and has twenty years              experience with Indigenous land based education. She holds a PhD              from the University of Manitoba, is currently a Distinguished              Visiting Scholar in the Faculty of Arts at Ryerson University and              faculty at the Dechinta Centre for Research & Learning in              Denendeh. Leanne's books are regularly used in courses across              Canada and the United States including Dancing on Our Turtle’s              Back, The Gift Is in the Making, Lighting the Eighth Fire              (editor), This Is An Honour Song (editor with Kiera Ladner) and              The Winter We Danced (Kino-nda-niimi editorial collective). Her              latest book, As We Have Always Done: Indigenous Freedom Through              Radical Resistance was published by the University of Minnesota              Press in the fall of 2017, and was awarded Best Subsequent Book              by the Native American and Indigenous Studies Association. https://www.leannesimpson.ca/

As              an educator, Alexis Pauline Gumbs walks in the legacy of Black              lady school teachers in post-slavery communities who offered              sacred educational space to the intergenerational newly free in              exchange for the random necessities of life. She honors the lives              and creative works of Black feminist geniuses as sacred texts for              all people. She believes that in the time we live in access to              the intersectional, holistic brilliance of the Black feminist              tradition is as crucial as learning how to read. She brings that              approach to her work as the provost of the Eternal Summer of the              Black Feminist Mind, a transmedia- enabled community school (aka              tiny black feminist university) and lending library based in              Durham, North Carolina.

         A              queer black troublemaker, a black feminist love evangelist and a              prayer poet priestess, Alexis has a PhD in English, African and              African-American Studies, and Women and Gender Studies from Duke              University. She was the first scholar to research the Audre Lorde              Papers at Spelman College, the June Jordan Papers at Harvard              University, and the Lucille Clifton Papers at Emory University              during her dissertation research.

         She              is the author of Spill: Scenes of Black Feminist Fugitivity, also              published by Duke University Press; coeditor of Revolutionary              Mothering: Love on the Front Lines; and the founder and director              of Eternal Summer of the Black Feminist Mind, an educational              program based in Durham, North Carolina. Following the innovative              collection Spill, Alexis Pauline Gumbs's M Archive—the second              book in a planned experimental triptych—is a series of poetic              artifacts that speculatively documents the persistence of Black              life following a worldwide cataclysm. Engaging with the work of              the foundational Black feminist theorist M. Jacqui Alexander, and              following the trajectory of Gumbs's acclaimed visionary fiction              short story “Evidence,” M Archive is told from the perspective of              a future researcher who uncovers evidence of the conditions of              late capitalism, antiblackness, and environmental crisis while              examining possibilities of being that exceed the human. http://alexispauline.com

ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:   

Restrooms: The              most accessible restrooms are on the basement floor.

         Seating: Wheelchair              seating is available at the front of each auditorium.

         For              mapped and numbered ADA access information: https://www.washington.edu/admin/ada/kane.php

         Parking: The              Central Plaza Garage (underground) is closest, has wheelchair and              disability parking on all levels. Use Kane elevator #168.

         Dial-A-Ride: Stop              #17 is located at the ride shelter at intersection of George              Washington Lane and Memorial Way, and is uphill from Kane Hall.

Winter Quarter        Social Justice Film Series        (Wednesday, March 6,        2019) 6:30 PM       

The             Kelly ECC is back with another social justice film series for             winter quarter!

        Each             Wednesday evening at 6:30, we'll be screening a film in the main             lobby! We hope to see you there!       

February's Focus: Black History        Month        March's Focus: Women's History Month        ------        FILM LINE-UP:        • March 6: Ladies First        • March 13: Neerja                ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:        

The             Samuel E. Kelly Ethnic Cultural Center is near landmarks such as             Alder Hall and Lander Hall.

        For             a map, search HUB on the campus maps: www.washington.edu/maps

        The             ECC’s front entrance is wheelchair accessible. There is an             elevator in the building.

        There             are universal, all-gender bathrooms in the building, as well as             gender binary bathrooms with multiple stalls.

        The             ECC is not kept scent-free, but we ask that you do not wear             scented/fragranced products (e.g. perfume, hair products) or             essential oils to/in the event in order to make the space             accessible to those with chemical injury or multiple chemical             sensitivity.      

University District Metro Bus        Routes can be found here: metro.kingcounty.gov/tops/bus/neighborhoods/university_district.html

The In-Between Tour        with DANakaDAN and Mike Bow        (Wednesday, March 6,        2019) 7 PM - 9 PM @ Hub Lyceum        Seattle, Washington 98195       

Ever             feel like you're not Asian enough? Not American enough? Join             Youtube rapper DANakaDAN and actor Mike Bow for a hip hop style             concert celebrating the feeling of being stuck between two             identities.

Free general admission. Interested in VIP meet and greet        tickets? Email asuwasc@uw.edu        or register for VIP tickets!

ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:       

The             Husky Union Building is near landmarks such as Allen Library,             Padelford and Sieg. For a map, search HUB on the campus             maps: http://www.washington.edu/maps/.The             HUB’s front entrance is wheelchair accessible and the common area             is to the right of the main desk.

        An             all-genders restroom can be found at the 3rd floor, down the             hallway from the Q Center. Gender binary bathrooms with multiple             stalls can be found on each floor of the HUB.

Indigenous and Women of Color Rise (Friday, March 8        2019) 7 PM - 10 PM @ The Seattle Public Library        Central Library, 1000 4th Ave, Seattle, Washington 98104     

As             our world burns, injustice festers around the globe. Patriarchy,             racism, and capitalism are bringing us to ruin. In the face of             this brutality, we need to elevate voices from the grassroots. And             not just any voices. We need radical voices that take no             prisoners, that speak the truth, that rip down the fantasies of             the powerful and inspire us to fight like our lives depend on it.

        On             March 8th, 2019 (International Women's Day), an event will be held             featuring two of these powerful voices: Dominique Christina, the             author of four books and the only person to EVER become a two-time             world champion in slam poetry, and Cherry Smiley, warrior hero,             feminist activist, scholar, and artist from the Nlaka'pamux             (Thompson) and Diné (Navajo) nations.       

The evening program will inform,        educate, empower, inspire, and strengthen our spirit for the injustices        we face: male violence, objectification, sexual exploitation, and        racialization.        Tickets are        available now!                ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:       

All             Library locations, restrooms and meeting rooms are             accessible with one or more accessible public computer             workstations.

        Designated             accessible parking spaces are available at all 27 locations.

        Automatic             doors at all main entrances.

        Elevator             access to all levels, with verbal cues at each floor at the             Central Library.

        TTY-enabled             courtesy (public) phones on Level 1 at the Central Library.       

Service Animals 

In compliance with the Washington State Law Against        Discrimination (WLAD), the Americans with Disability Act (ADA), and the        Seattle Municipal Code, service animals are welcome in all areas of the        Library where members of the public are normally allowed to go.

Free, rapid        HIV Testing and PrEP counseling provided by Lifelong.        First come, first serve, walk-in appointments available on the last        Monday of every month during Fall, Winter, and Spring quarters!                 Other Times Offered (All        times at Q-Center from 1:00 PM - 4:00 PM)    

Monday,             March 25

        Monday,             April 29

        Monday,             May 27       

ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:       

The             Husky Union Building is near landmarks such as Allen Library,             Padelford and Sieg. For a map, search HUB on the campus             maps: http://www.washington.edu/maps/.The             HUB’s front entrance is wheelchair accessible and the common area             is to the right of the main desk.

        An             all-genders restroom can be found at the 3rd floor, down the             hallway from the Q Center. Gender binary bathrooms with multiple             stalls can be found on each floor of the HUB.

        The             HUB IS not kept scent-free but we ask that you do not wear             scented/fragranced products (e.g. perfume, hair products) or             essential oils to/in the Q Center in order to make the space             accessible to those with chemical injury or multiple chemical             sensitivity. To request disability accommodation, contact the             Disability Services Office at 206-543-6450 (voice), 206-543-6452             (TTY), 206-685-7264 (fax), or dso@uw.edu preferably 10 days in             advance.

       Let’s Talk is a free        program that connects UW students with support from experienced        counselors from the Counseling Center and Hall Health Center without an        appointment. Counselors hold drop-in hours        at four sites on campus:                

Mondays, 2-4 PM, Odegaard Library Room 222

        Tuesdays, 2-4 PM, Ethnic Cultural Center Room 306

        Wednesdays, 2-4 PM, Q Center (HUB 315)

        Thursdays, 2-4 PM, Mary Gates Hall Room 134E       

Let’s Talk offers        informal consultation – it is not a substitute for regular therapy,        counseling, or psychiatric care. To learn more, visit letstalk.washington.edu.                ACCESSIBILITY        INFORMATION:       

The             HUB’s front entrance is wheelchair accessible and the common area             is to the right of the main desk.

        An             all-genders restroom can be found at the 3rd floor, down the             hallway from the Q Center. Gender binary bathrooms with multiple             stalls can be found on each floor of the HUB.

        The             HUB IS not kept scent-free but we ask that you do not wear             scented/fragranced products (e.g. perfume, hair products) or             essential oils to/in the Q Center in order to make the space             accessible to those with chemical injury or multiple chemical             sensitivity. 

        The             ECC has single-stall gender-neutral bathrooms on each floor, near             the gender-binary bathrooms to which signs are indicated. 

        Odegaard             Library is not ADA accessible nor scent free.  

        All             rooms in Mary Gates Hall are wheelchair accessible. Please contact             the Disability Services             Office at 206.543.6450 or dso@uw.edu.             MGH is not scent free.

Thank you for being a part of our community <3         We are so glad that you are here, and we are so glad to get to know        you!         Have questions about the QSC? Just want to get involved? Find our        office hours online at hours.asuw.org.        To hear more from the QSC be sure to like us on facebook, and follow us on twitter & instagram to stay up to date with        all queer and trans related happenings on campus and in Seattle!                 With love,         Mehria Ibrahimi, Outreach & Engagement Intern. 

[the-canary]

What If? - S.R

Summary: In which Steve Rogers finally takes a chance of his own. (Reader/Steve Rogers)

Word Count: 1.5K

Prompt: Delight

Masterlist

A/N: This is for @redgillan‘s birthday challenge. This is the first time I have written for Steve and I got a little too excited and ran with the idea i got in my head. Just to step up a timeline, first part takes place after the first Avengers and the second part some time before Winter Soldier. 

Please enjoy and feedback is always welcomed.

After the Battle of the New York, Steve Rogers is allowed a small respite as the Avengers Tower is finished being built and the rest of the city tries to find itself after all the destruction. Steve tries his hardest to find his own place within this new version of his home, of what he should be in this era and he spends a lot of time people watching – seeing others trying to help one another, strangers helping strangers find a place to stay or missing loved ones. It gives him a sense of hope for a society that seems so closed off to him. And through the following months, Steve finds himself in a small cafe in Manhattan, because it’s closer to the Tower and he really can’t find a good coffee place in Brooklyn without being hassled.

Blue eyes look around to watch all the people that pass by through the mid-morning rush, but one catches his attention most off all. A young woman that often sits in the back either writing on papers or hiding behind huge glasses and a thick book. However, she always pauses and talks to the older people that seem to know her so well, she smiles and laughs behind a cup of coffee – and Steve Rogers draws her from time to time. He's captivated.

“You should talk to her sometime, kid,” Stan, the owner of the shop, tells him drawing Steve out of glancing at you from the countertop seat he frequents, “Don’t wanna miss ya chance.”

It takes him two weeks to get the courage to talk to her.

 You're reading something by a Jon Meacham and downing your last coffee, as he stands next to the empty seat across from yours.

“H-Hi,” he tries not to let his voice shake, as you look up and your eyes grow at the sight of him, though not exactly for all the reasons he is used to, “Can I sit here?”

“S-Sure,” you voice is equally as shaky as he does,”To what do I owe the pleasure today?”

You smile and put down your book before taking another sip of coffee. It’s small talk at first as you try to ignore who Steve Rogers actually is, who he has been to you your whole life, but as you learn a little more about him on a personal level it’s all water under the bridge. You talk about the book you’re reading and what you do for a living – a professor in a certain prestigious university.    

“So, what’s your field of expertise?” he eventually asks, and you feel your cheeks suddenly burning up.

“Ummm…well you,” you cough out in embarrassment, as he looks out you in utter confusion. Oh, it could only go downhill from here, “Well, specifically the use of Captain America imagery and propaganda post World War II and during the Red Scare.”

“I see,” is all he can say, as you sweep a hand over your messy hair due to your anxiety overwhelming everything else in that moment, because only you could mess up meeting Steve Rogers after months of seeing him from afar, because in all the months of stealing glance behind books and graded papers – you saw that he wasn’t self-righteous and honorable Captain America but sweet and kind of shy man that enjoyed his coffee with two sugars and lots of cream, that sometimes liked sitting next to a window to draw those huge skyscrapers or a person passing by.

Oh god, only you could fuck this up, and you still were. If only someone could stop you from opening your big mouth.

“You should have seen it…Mr. Stark hated McCarthy using your image,” you babble on due to nerves, as Steve covers his mouth to hide his smile, though you take it as something else,”Ran all the newspapers with any rumor he could find out about ‘im.”

Steve shakes his head, something like that clearly reminding him of the flamboyant scientist and millionaire he once knew, but it also reminded him of the cruel fact that he missed so much. His face is clean of any expression as you begin to put two and two together (and try to stop yourself from saying anything worse), but your phone does the job as it rings. You surprised to hear the Dean of the Political Science Department yelling congratulations and for a moment Steve smiles at your bright eyes and excited hand movements.

“Henry, you’re joking, seriously!” you cradle the phone between your shoulder and ear and begin to gather all your papers and books, clearly not trying to glance at the specimen of a man across from you in the obvious disappointment of how your talk went – at least in your opinion, “I’ll be there before my afternoon classes…Ok, ok, as soon as possible.”

“Big news?” he questions with a slight smile, as you nod enthusiastically.

“I got awarded something huge,” your eyes widen, while talking and he can’t help but get caught in your bright facial expressions,”but, I really have to go now.”

“That’s completely fine,” Steve smiles catching some your eagerness,” and congratulations.”

“It was great meeting you. Maybe–” we could hang out again sometime, but you pause and stop from embarrassing yourself any further. He doesn’t seem to catch what you were going to say, as you wave goodbye.

He watches you run out the door without another world, promising himself that he’ll turn this awkward situation around. Steve Rogers waits two weeks and there’s no sight of you, on the third he asks Stan if anything had happened to you. Something better, he said proudly like a doting grandfather. You had gone to Washington D.C on a fellowship.

Steve Rogers had missed his chance again.  

It’s another two years and Steve Rogers learns more – he slowly learns to stop living in the past, to trust in the small family he has formed. However, he still finds himself slipping to the what-ifs off it all, particularly more recent ones. Maybe, that’s why he isn’t feeling the opening gala of the Museum of the City of New York’s Captain America Exhibit – all of his accomplishments and failures in one place, though he still kept the professional smile along with the tailored-made suit Tony had made for the occasion. He doesn’t slip once, especially when talking to people and even when giving his speech – all everyone ever wanted was the hero, and he played it well. Playing it safe, he stands away from the stage after his moment, his thoughts are everywhere until the presenter starts thanking all the curators and historical professors that helped make the exhibit possible and then he hears a familiar voice.

“It is thanks to her diligent effort that we added an extra wing on Captain America’s influence after WWII,” the emcee claps, as you smile in a blue dress and stylish pair of black glasses.

You’re glowing at all your hard work and Steve smiles a little bit more than before, but he knows he can’t let this chance slip away. You blush and look away and Steve in all his single-minded stubbornness knows he needs to talk to you again. However, that's easier said and done, as both of you are pushed back and forth to be put on display but due to different reasons. It isn’t until well into the night that you are both pushed onto the empty dance floor – him due to Tony and you because of your co-workers. Steve is standing in the middle of all those dimming lights, and you’re completely breathless.   

“Captain Rogers,” you greet him, as he grabs you by the waist as the old song begins to play.

“Steve is just fine,” he murmurs softly, as you smile while slowly swaying to the song. The rest of the room is completely forgotten and neither of you say anything for awhile. You hum lightly, as he chuckles while rubbing small circles on the back of your dress. But, just like before you had to open your big mouth.  

“Isn’t it weird?” you ask as blue eyes turn to meet your own.

“What exactly?” he smiles, knowing where you are going with this train of thought already.

“I mean, I know everything about you from an academic standpoint,” you explain in confusion, which causes him to laugh. It’s then that Steve decides to make a what-if possible.

“Then, how about from a personal one?” he asks in a pleading, hushed tone and your eyes widen like saucers.

“W-What?”

“It’s taken me a long time to adjust,” he pauses as he swings you away and back from him. A light blush on your face as he pulls you closer than before, “But, in all this time, I still miss that little shop back in Manhattan, I missed what could have been and I’m tired of the what-ifs.”

“What if?” you keep questioning, as he moves his hand from yours to cradle your cheek.

“…What if I had talked faster? What if I had asked for her number?” he whispers eagerly as his forehead touches yours, “What if I asked to kiss her right now?”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind,” you pause and let out as an afterthought, “after a couple of dates.”

“You think she’s free Friday night?”

“Definitely.”

Steve lets out a hearty laugh and feels a truly warm and delightful feeling at grasping something for himself for once. It gets a little better when you decide to steal a quick peck before the night is over.

[tessaxjanelle]

Janelle Monáe and Tessa Thompson: 2015-2018 Timeline

2014/2015:

Tessa's dad introduced her to Janelle's music. 

Janelle and Tessa officially met while auditioning for a part in the movie Joy.

April 13 2015:

Tessa was featured in Janelle’s music video as a background dancer for “Yoga” (x)

May 30 2015:

Janelle performed at the MOCA charity gala in LA  - Tessa attended as well. (x)

August 22 2015:

Issa Rae, Justin Simien, Tessa, Janelle, and Angela Bassett hang out backstage at the Eephus Tour. (x)

November 7 2015:

Janelle received the “Equality Award” at the 18th Annual Women’s Event hosted by the Center in New York (NYC’s LGBT Community Center). Tessa presented her with the award that night. (x) (x) (x)

November 20 2015:

Janelle surprised Tessa on the red carpet at the Creed premiere - the film that really launched Tessa’s career. (x) (x)

November 27 2015: 

In an interview, Tessa talked about Creed and her favorite singers. She talked about Janelle first: (x)

“I’m going to give a shout out to my friend Janelle Monáe. She is fantastically talented. I got the chance to give her an award. She sang her a capella rendition of “Smile” in a room for some friends, and she just killed it.”

December 2015:

Janelle, Tessa, and other friends took a trip to Mexico for Janelle’s birthday. 

For the most part, Janelle and Tessa were very quiet in 2016, most likely due to the fact Tessa was on location for most of the year filming Thor: Ragnarok and Annihilation.

December 7 2016:

Tessa posts a pic on instagram and Janelle comments with hearts emojis (link is broken).

February 25 2017:

Tessa and Janelle both attended the annual Oscars Week “Sistah’s Soiree” at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel. (x) (x) 

February 26 2017:

The night of the Oscar’s. (x)

August 6 2017:

Tessa posts a picture on Instagram, and Janelle comments a heart eyes emoji. (x)

August 22 2017: 

Out with Rowan Blanchard. (x)

August 24 2017:

Boots Riley out with Tessa, Janelle, Carrie Brownstein, and Nate. (x)

August 26 2017:

Tessa and Janelle at Ava DuVernay’s birthday party. (x) (x) (x) 

September 9 2017:

Tessa and Janelle at an outdoor music/film event in LA. (x) (x) (x) (x)

September 15/16 2017:

Tessa tweeted about Janelle. (x) 

Later it was found out that Janelle did an impromptu performance and said the line Tessa tweeted about. You can see Tessa off to the right in the second linked video around the 1 minute mark. (x) (x) 

September 16 2017: 

Tessa and Janelle attended the annual Equality California Awards (EQCA’s), an award show that honors individuals who work to help create a more equal society for the LGBT community. (x) (x) (x) 

September 17 2017:

The pair were seen cuddled up at the HBO Emmy’s after party. (x) (x) 

Janelle later posted about it. (x)

October 4 2017: 

Tessa quoted Janelle birthday wishes on Twitter. (x) 

October 5 2017:

Tessa posted on Instagram pictures of the flowers she received for her birthday. Janelle just so happens to send flowers exactly like the ones Tessa posted about. (x) (x)

October 8 2017:

Issa Rae threw a last minute “Lemon Pepper Kickback” house party in Atlanta - Tessa and Janelle attended. (x) (x) (x) 

Earlier in the night, Tessa, Janelle, and Amandla Stenberg attended a Nick Hakim concert. (x) (x) (x) 

According to another concert go-er that attended Nick’s show that night, Tessa and Janelle were touching each other a lot and were calling each other baby. (x)

October 12 2017:

On Instagram, Janelle posted a screenshot of a conversation between her and “the love of [her] life” and referred to this person as her “partner”. She deleted quickly. 

Many think Tessa sent the message because she had used the same phrasing regarding the Time’s Up movement in an interview (specifically the word endured), and worked closely with the Time’s Up movement that year. 

Also from other receipts, we know they call each other baby/babe a lot.

October 20 2017:

Twitter user __theluckyyyone tweeted: @janellemonae is definitely next to @tessamaethompson.

October 22 2017:

Someone verified received an email from Janelle. Janelle mentions Tessa in the email. (x)

October 27 2017:

Janelle and Tessa were seen with friends for dinner, sitting next to each other (links are broken).

November 8 2017:

Janelle tweets about Tessa, her "talented friend” (x) 

December 9 2017:

Out with Lena Waithe. (x)

December 14 2017:

Some mentioned that Tessa was in Atlanta.

December 15/16 2017:

During these two days, Janelle tweeted a lot. However, the tweet linked was the only tweet Tessa liked. (x)

Nobody is knows exactly when Tessa left ATL, but she was in LA the 17th for West World’s season 2 wrap a party. 

January 3 2018: 

Tessa was spotted in Atlanta. January 5 2018:

Both spotted at a café in Atlanta. The Twitter user who posted about it now has their tweets protected so I can’t link the tweet. 

January 28 2018: 

Janelle gave a Time’s Up speech on The Grammys stage, and a tweet storm from Tessa “supportive gf” Thompson followed. 

January 29 2018:

Tessa and Janelle were seen at the Black Panther premiere together. (x) (x)

They later left together as well (you can see Janelle by Nate in the first video, and then Tessa running to catch up with Nate in the second video). (x) (x) 

January 30 2018:

They were spotted having dinner together. (x)

February 5 2018:

Janelle and Tessa went live on Instagram.

Here are some of the best moments in gif form. (x) (x) (x) (x)

Zoe Kravitz also spilled some tea. (x)

February 5 2018:

2 Dope Queens premiere. (x)

February 11/12 2018: 

Tessa posted Instagram stories with Janelle and Nate. No one saved the video.

February 13 2018:

Tessa and Janelle attended the Annihilation premiere, and were photographed with on another on the actual red carpet. (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

Lip readers were able to decipher some of what they said to each other on the read carpet. Note the the gif where Janelle says sorry babe. (x) (x) 

February 16 2018:

The trailer for Dirty Computer was released. (x) 

Here are two clips from it: 

February 20 2018:

Janelle’s cover spread for W Magazine dropped. Jordan Peele directed, and Tessa approved. 

February 22 2018:

Janelle released her first two singles off of Dirty Computer. Make Me Feel has been coined a bisexual anthem (Tessa’s words, not mine), and up until this point, it had been the closest thing we’ve seen to a coming out from Janelle. 

Tessa also stars in the music video: 

Credit for the next two gifs (x)

Credit for the next two gifs (x)

Tessa posted about it as well. (x)

February 23 2018:

Tessa did an interview with Entertainment Tonight, and in that interview she pretended she didn’t know what shipping meant, even though we know she’s familiar with different Internet lingo.

She was also heavily stumbled over her words before she was able to get a "we’re really good friends" out. (x)

February 24 2018:

Janelle tweeted about Annihilation. Peep Wondaland liking the second tweet. (x)

February 26 2018:

Janelle tweeted something romantic the same day they both attended the Wrinkle in Time premiere (no pictures were taken together). 

Here are the tweets: (x) (x)

February 28 2018:

Tessa and Janelle both attended Alfre Woodard’s 2018 Pre-Oscars Soiree (x)

March 2 2018: 

Tessa attends Janelle’s Fem the Future event. (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

Janelle went live on Instagram, and it appeared throughout the whole event that wherever Tessa was, Janelle was right by her. 

March 3 2018:

Janelle and Tessa attended the Essence Black Women in Hollywood Event.

Pictures: (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

Janelle revealing how her and Tessa first met. (x)

Janelle interrupted an interview Tessa was doing on the red carpet (and proceeded to hold Tessa’s hand) and presented Tessa with an award.

Watch Tessa try to contain her smitten smile from 2:25 and on after Janelle walks away... So cute. 

March 10 2018:

Tessa was in Miami for VCCarnaval Event.

A instagram story was posted that showed she was talking about Janelle with her friends. (x)

She left Miami that day. 

March 13 2018:

Tessa tweeted about "Paddington 2 and chill."

Janelle was in London at the time doing promo for Dirty Computer, and later we found out that Tessa was also in London at the same time. (x)

March 18 2018:

Janelle wants her own Josie Radek (Tessa’s character from Annihilation). She later deleted the Instagram story. (x)

March 19 2018:

The twitter page @tessasgoats comes to life, and both Tessa and Janelle follow it. Janelle was liking many of the pictures the twitter page was posting.  March 25 2018:

This is more so speculation, but there was an article/interview about Janelle that basically said that Janelle was the truth. After a short time, Tessa tweeted "the truth is so cute" - Janelle liked. (x)

There's also a response to the tweet too from Tessa. (x)

March 30 2018:

Tessa commented on Janelle's Instagram post with a rose emoji. Janelle replied to Tessa with a rose emoji. (x) (x)

Tessa also liked this picture within 3 minutes of Janelle posting it. 

April 1 2018:

Tessa posts about an artist. Janelle followed it. (x) (x)

April 3 2018:

What Janelle’s Twitter page looked like that day. (x)

April 6-8 2018:

Tessa went out of her way to be at Nate’s birthday bash in Miami. She left the 8th, and tweeted about delayed flights. 

April 10 2018:

PYNK dropped and Lena Waithe commented on Janelle’s Instagram, “That’s how you feel? Perfect.”

April 11 2018:

Ava DuVernay gave us some good tea when she posted this on her Instagram story. (x)

April 26 2018:

The day before Dirty Computer dropped, Janelle came out as pansexual the Rolling Stone. (x)

April 27 2018:

Dirty Computer’s emotion picture dropped. In Janelle's note to Tessa in the album booklet, she called Tessa her muse. (x) (x)

April 28 2018:

Justin Simien (creator of Dear White People) made a post on Instagram where he called them "wives" with a screen-cap of the PYNK video. He deleted it, and uploaded a new one with different caption.

May 2 2018: 

Janelle arrived in Philly for Michele Obama's College Signing Day. Tessa was in Philly filming for Creed II. 

They were spotted by 2 different people late at night. (x) (x)

After Tessa came out, this receipt dropped from that night as well. (x)

May 5 2018:

They were both in NYC but were staying in different hotels. Janelle was at The Mark, and Tessa was at The Bowery. 

This was also the day of Janelle's 'Dirty Computer' NYC album release party. They arrived separately, and Tessa stayed for an hour. (x) (x) (x)

May 7 2018:

They both attended the Met Gala and the after parties. They were by each other the whole time. (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

May 9 2018:

They went to see the play Angels in America, and had dinner at Chez Josephine restaurant. (x) 

People tweeted about it. (x) (x)

May 15 2018:

Janelle followed @thombrowneny (the guy who designed Tessa's outfits for the Met Gala). 

May 17 2018:

Janelle followed Marc Anthony Thompson (Tessa’s dad). (x) 

May 20 2018: 

Janelle was seen in Philly.

May 21 2018:

Janelle tweeted about Sorry to Bother You, and Tessa retweeted it. (x)

May 23 2018:

Tessa posted a birthday video to her dad on Instagram. Janelle commented with a heart and Tessa responded with a rose. (x)

Janelle also commented on Tessa’s dad’s picture. (x)

May 24 2018:

Janelle posted a picture on Instagram with Michelle Obama, and Tessa commented on it. Jane replied with a rose emoji. (x)

May 25 2018:

Tessa being supportive on Twitter. (x)

May 28 2018:

Tessa’s friend’s dog dancing to PYNK on her story. (x)

May 31 2018:

Speculation so make what you want of this - While in LA (where Tessa lives) Janelle posted on her story saying "it's just not the same without you.” (x)

While in Philly shooting Creed II, Tessa then proceeded to post on her story, "misery loves company" while fake crying. (x)

Janelle then deleted her story after Tessa posted her’s.

June 3 2018:

Janelle liked a drawing with both of them from PYNK on Twitter. (x)

June 8 2018:

Spotted in LA. (x)

June 11 2018:

Janelle’s tour started in Seattle. 

Tessa posted flamingoes on her Instagram story before it. (x)

June 14 2018:

There was a special screening of Sorry to Bother You in LA. Janelle came straight from Portland (she had a show there the 13th) just to support Tessa. (x) 

There was an Instagram story (that no one saved) where you can see Janelle and Tessa by each other mingling at the after party. Janelle apparently also greeted Tessa with a hug and kiss on the cheek before she went in to the viewing.

June 15 2018:

Janelle tweeted about Tessa and Sorry to Bother You. (x) (x)

June 19 2018:

Tessa liked these pictures of Janelle on Instagram. (x) (x)

June 20 2018:

Tessa was in NYC promoting Sorry to Bother You, but two days later Janelle unarchived a photo where she’s wearing the same outfit Tessa was wearing while in NYC. (x) 

June 26 2018:

Tessa put a pride flag in her bio on Instagram. (x)

June 29 2018:

Tessa came out as bisexual in an interview she did for Net-a-Porter. (x)

She also said this about her and Janelle: “We love each other deeply, we’re so close. We vibrate on the same frequency.”

It’s already been added previously, but this receipt came a day after Tessa came out. It has to do with the dinner date they had in Philly back in May. (x)

July 14 & 15 2018:

Janelle continued to promote Sorry to Bother You. (x) (x)

July 22 2018:

Tessa posted two stories on Instagram showing the crowd going crazy over her being featured on the screen while Janelle performs PYNK. (x) (x)

July 27 2018:

The two songs Janelle was featured on for Sorry to Bother You were released. (x) (x)

July 31 2018:

Tessa posted two flamingos on her Instagram story. Flamingos are gay symbol, specifically a symbol for lesbian marriage ( I’m not saying Tessa and Janelle are married). Flamingos also mate for life. 

August 4 2018:

Janelle liked the last 3 pictures Tessa had posted (at the time) and unarchived an old picture of them with Zoe. (x)

August 22 2018:

Janelle’s hairstylist posted a picture of Janelle from her spread with Bustle. Tessa liked it. (x)

September 4 2018:

Tessa liked Janelle's video on Instagram. (x)

September 9 2018:

Tessa liked Janelle’s tweet. (x)

September 11 2018: 

Tessa attended Janelle’s first show in London. There were a lot of tweets about her and Janelle. (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

People were also reporting that Tessa cried. (x) (x) 

On TLC, an anon who was at the show posted this:

So I was in the London crowd tonight and had a pretty good view of both Tessa and Janelle. What a night! Really didn’t expect this. Tessa seemed to stand on top of a step or something so she was pretty visible. Nate was maybe 4 meters away from her by the mixing booth. A couple of things I noticed:

Tessa did not look at the screen when the audience cheered for her video clip appearance during PYNK. She kept looking away during moments like this throughout the evening. A couple of people took selfies with her so she must have been aware of people watching. She laughed a lot during I Got the Juice, particularly when Janelle told the crowd: ‘If I point at you - you will come on stage and you will dance!’ … 

Tessa seemed to giggle and repeated Janelle’s pointing motion followed by a simulated lasso into Janelle’s direction. She was on the phone throughout the rhythm dance intro in the beginning of Make me Feel… We all know what happened next - she must have gone live soon after

There were a couple of moments where she was flat out beaming.

Tessa was laughing really hard when Janelle did the microphone dildo pose…

Note how Janelle snuck in an 'I see you baby’ at the end… Not sure if she meant the crowd or someone particular there  

Tessa was watching the whole thing with her bright, beaming smile - that was definitely one of those moments when you could see that they have a connection. It was a great thing to see the two across from each other.

I remember watching Tessa’s reaction to the 'If I’m gonna sin it’s with you line’ and she was definitely singing / speaking along with the lyrics… and then Janelle inserted 'London’." 

September 13 2018:

Tessa, Janelle, and Zoe caught dinner at Sketch (a restaurant in London). (x)

September 14 2018:

Janelle traveled to Berlin, but posted an Instagram story showing her new flamingo rings. (x) 

A couple of hours later Tessa posted an Instagram story with a picture of a flamingo as well. 

September 17 2018:

Janelle’s a Revolution of Love documentary was released on Youtube. It included bloopers and unseen footage from the PYNK music video. (x) (x)

It also featured Tessa talking about what she loves about Janelle. Kehlani, who’s friends with Janelle, liked the tweet. (x)

September 26 2018:

Janelle retweeted Tessa’s tweet regarding the Creed II trailer that dropped the same day. (x)

October 2 2018:

The night before Tessa’s birthday, Janelle tweeted this. (x)

On the 3rd (her birthday), Tessa posted a video on her story of her dancing. 

October 3 2018:

Janelle started the day off by posting two images of flamingos on her story.

Janelle then proceeded to post this.

Lastly, she commented on Tessa’s post.

October 4 2018:

The day after her birthday, Tessa tweeted this in direct reference to Janelle’s tweet on the second that said, “Dance like a goat.” (x)

Dance like a Goat ended up being an actual song that Janelle and Wondaland created specifically for Tessa and her birthday. (x)

Janelle commented on Tessa’s post of her dancing. 

October 5 2018:

Dance like a Goat finally dropped! (x)

News that Janelle had been cast in Disney’s ‘Lady And The Tramp’ reboot was announced as well.

When it was announced that Tessa was going to be in the movie she tweeted the following:

When it was announced Janelle was going to be in it as well, she tweeted the same: 

Janelle had initially tweeted “woof woof” but then deleted it so she could match Tessa’s.

October 6 2018:

Some of Janelle’s likes regarding Dance like a Goat.

[blackkudos]

Benny Carter

Bennett Lester "Benny" Carter (August 8, 1907 – July 12, 2003) was an American jazz alto saxophonist, clarinetist, trumpeter, composer, arranger, and bandleader. He was a major figure in jazz from the 1930s to the 1990s, and was recognized as such by other jazz musicians who called him King. In 1958, he performed with Billie Holiday at the Monterey Jazz Festival - but, then, really, he performed with every major artist of several many jazz generations, and at every major festival you could possibly care to name.

The National Endowment for the Arts honored Benny Carter with its highest honor in jazz, the NEA Jazz Masters Award for 1986. He was awarded the Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award in 1987, and both won a Grammy Award for his solo "Prelude to a Kiss" and received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 1994. In 2000 awarded the National Endowment for the Arts, National Medal of Arts, presented by President Bill Clinton.

Biography

Born in New York City in 1907, the youngest of six children and the only boy, received his first music lessons on piano from his mother. Largely self-taught, by age fifteen, Carter was already sitting in at Harlem night spots. From 1924 to 1928, Carter gained valuable professional experience as a sideman in some of New York's top bands. As a youth, Carter lived in Harlem around the corner from Bubber Miley who was Duke Ellington's star trumpeter, Carter was inspired by Miley and bought a trumpet, but when he found he couldn't play like Miley he traded the trumpet in for a saxophone. For the next two years he played with such jazz greats as cornetist Rex Stewart, clarinetist-soprano saxophonist Sidney Bechet, pianists Earl Hines, Willie "The Lion" Smith, pianist Fats Waller, pianist James P. Johnson, pianist Duke Ellington and their various groups.

First recordings

He first recorded in 1928 with Charlie Johnson's Orchestra, also arranging the titles recorded, and formed his first big band the following year. He played with Fletcher Henderson in 1930 and 1931, becoming his chief arranger in this time, then briefly led the Detroit-based McKinney's Cotton Pickers before returning to New York in 1932 to lead his own band, which included such swing stars as Leon "Chu" Berry (tenor saxophone), Teddy Wilson (piano), Sid Catlett (drums), and Dicky Wells (trombone). Carter's arrangements were sophisticated and very complex, and a number of them became swing standards which were performed by other bands ("Blue Lou" is a great example of this). He also arranged for Duke Ellington during these years. Carter was most noted for his superb arrangements. Among the most significant are "Keep a Song in Your Soul", written for Fletcher Henderson in 1930, and "Lonesome Nights" and "Symphony in Riffs" from 1933, both of which show Carter's fluid writing for saxophones. By the early 1930s he and Johnny Hodges were considered the leading alto players of the day. Carter also quickly became a leading trumpet soloist, having rediscovered the instrument. He recorded extensively on trumpet in the 1930s. Carter's name first appeared on records with a 1932 Crown label release of "Tell All Your Day Dreams to Me" credited to Bennie Carter and his Harlemites. Carter's short-lived Orchestra played the Harlem Club in New York but only recorded a handful of brilliant records for Columbia, OKeh and Vocalion. The OKeh sides were issued under the name Chocolate Dandies. His trumpet solo on the October 1933 recording of "Once Upon A Time" by the Chocolate Dandies (OKeh 41568 and subsequently reissued on Decca 18255 and Hot Record Society 16) has long been considered a milestone solo achievement.

In 1933 Carter took part in an amazing series of sessions that featured the British band leader Spike Hughes, who went to New York specifically to organize a series of recordings featuring the best Black musicians available. These 14 sides plus four by Carter's big band were only issued in England at the time, originally titled Spike Hughes and His Negro Orchestra. The musicians were mainly made up from members of Carter's band. The bands (14–15 pieces) include such major players as Henry "Red" Allen (trumpet), Dicky Wells (trombone), Wayman Carver (flute), Coleman Hawkins (saxophone), J.C. Higginbotham (trombone), and Leon "Chu" Berry (saxophone), tracks include: "Nocturne", "Someone Stole Gabriel's Horn", "Pastorale", "Bugle Call Rag", "Arabesque", "Fanfare", "Sweet Sorrow Blues", "Music at Midnight", "Sweet Sue Just You", "Air in D Flat", "Donegal Cradle Song", "Firebird", "Music at Sunrise", and "How Come You Do Me Like You Do".

Europe

Carter moved to Europe in 1935 to play trumpet with Willie Lewis's orchestra, and also became staff arranger for the British Broadcasting Corporation dance orchestra and made several records. Over the next three years, he traveled throughout Europe, playing and recording with the top British, French, and Scandinavian jazzmen, as well as with visiting American stars such as his friend Coleman Hawkins. Two recordings that showcase his sound most famously are 1937's "Honeysuckle Rose," recorded with Django Reinhardt and Coleman Hawkins in Europe, and the same tune reprised on his 1961 album Further Definitions, an album considered a masterpiece and one of jazz's most influential recordings.

Return to Harlem and a move to Los Angeles

Returning home in 1938, he quickly formed another superb orchestra, which spent much of 1939 and 1940 at Harlem's famed Savoy Ballroom. His arrangements were much in demand and were featured on recordings by Benny Goodman, Count Basie, Duke Ellington, Lena Horne, Glenn Miller, Gene Krupa, and Tommy Dorsey. Though he only had one major hit in the big band era (a novelty song called "Cow-Cow Boogie," sung by Ella Mae Morse), during the 1930s Carter composed and/or arranged many of the pieces that became swing era classics, such as "When Lights Are Low," “Blues in My Heart," and "Lonesome Nights."

He relocated to Los Angeles in 1943, moved increasingly into studio work. Beginning with "Stormy Weather" in 1943, he arranged for dozens of feature films and television productions. In Hollywood, he wrote arrangements for such artists as Billie Holiday, Sarah Vaughan, Billy Eckstine, Pearl Bailey, Ray Charles, Peggy Lee, Lou Rawls, Louis Armstrong, Freddie Slack and Mel Torme. In 1945, trumpeter Miles Davis made his first recordings with Carter as sideman on album Benny Carter and His Orchestra, and considered him a close friend and mentor. Carter was one of the first black men to compose music for films. He was an inspiration and a mentor for Quincy Jones when Jones began writing for television and films in the 1960s. Carter's successful legal battles in order to obtain housing in then-exclusive neighborhoods in the Los Angeles area made him a pioneer in an entirely different area.

Benny Carter visited Australia in 1960 with his own quartet, performed at the 1968 Newport Jazz Festival with Dizzy Gillespie, and recorded with a Scandinavian band in Switzerland the same year. His studio work in the 1960s included arranging and sometimes performing on Peggy Lee's Mink Jazz, (1962) and on the single "I'm A Woman" in the same year.

Academia

In 1969, Carter was persuaded by Morroe Berger, a sociology professor at Princeton University who had done his master's thesis on jazz, to spend a weekend at the college as part of some classes, seminars, and a concert. This led to a new outlet for Carter's talent: teaching. For the next nine years he visited Princeton five times, most of them brief stays except for one in 1973 when he spent a semester there as a visiting professor. In 1974 Princeton awarded him an honorary master of humanities degree. He conducted workshops and seminars at several other universities and was a visiting lecturer at Harvard for a week in 1987. Morroe Berger also wrote the book Benny Carter – A Life in American Music (1982), a two-volume work, covers Carter's career in depth, an essential work of jazz scholarship.

In the late summer of 1989 the Classical Jazz series of concerts at New York's Lincoln Center celebrated Carter's 82nd birthday with a set of his songs, sung by Ernestine Anderson and Sylvia Syms. In the same week, at the Chicago Jazz Festival, he presented a recreation of his Further Definitions album, using some of the original musicians. In February 1990, Carter led an all-star big band at the Lincoln Center in a concert tribute to Ella Fitzgerald. Carter was a member of the music advisory panel of the National Endowment for the Arts. In 1990, Carter was named "Jazz Artist of the Year" in both the Down Beat and Jazz Times International Critics' polls. In 1978, he was inducted into the Black Filmmakers Hall of Fame and in 1980 received the Golden Score award of the American Society of Music Arrangers. Carter was also a Kennedy Center Honoree in 1996, and received honorary doctorates from Princeton (1974), Rutgers (1991), Harvard (1994), and the New England Conservatory (1998).

One of the most remarkable things about Benny Carter's career was its length. It has been said that he is the only musician to have recorded in eight different decades. Having started a career in music before music was recorded electrically, Carter remained a masterful musician, arranger and composer until he retired from performing in 1997. In 1998, Benny Carter was honored at Third Annual Awards Gala and Concert at Lincoln Center. He received the Jazz at Lincoln Center Award for Artistic Excellence and his music was performed by the Lincoln Center Jazz Orchestra with Wynton Marsalis, Diana Krall and Bobby Short. Wynton accepted on Benny's behalf. (Back trouble prevented Benny from attending.)

Carter died in Los Angeles, at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center July 12, 2003 from complications of bronchitis at the age of 95. In 1979, he married Hilma Ollila Arons, who survived him, along with a daughter, a granddaughter and a grandson.

Songs composed by Carter

"Blues in My Heart" (1931) with Irving Mills

"When Lights Are Low" (1936) with Spencer Williams

"Cow-Cow Boogie (Cuma-Ti-Yi-Yi-Ay)" (1942) with Don Raye and Gene De Paul

"Key Largo" (1948) with Karl Suessdorf, Leah Worth

"Rock Me to Sleep" (1950) with Paul Vandervoort II

"A Kiss from You" (1964) with Johnny Mercer

"Only Trust Your Heart" (1964) with Sammy Cahn

Other songs by Carter include "A Walkin' Thing", "My Kind of Trouble Is You", "Easy Money", "Blue Star", "I Still Love Him So", "Green Wine" and "Malibu". Of course there are, literally, hundreds more - he truly was one of jazz's greatest composers.

http://wikipedia.thetimetube.com/?q=Benny+Carter&lang=en

[architectnews]

24H Competition: Architecture Design

24H Competition, Winners, 2021 Architecture Contest, 38th Edition, Images

24H Competition: Design Contests

Architectural Contest News + Winners – Sustainable Architecture Design 2021

24 May 2021

24H Competition culturEart

24H competition 38th edition – culturEart

The heart of culture will be the epicenter of all emotions, this Sacred place of wisdom and knowledge that feeds a people and moves them forward. Here minds are opened, and the reason is challenged. Feeling takes place and takes us to places we didn’t know existed. We will be less reason and more emotion and, therefore, more human.

We will have the ability to dream and unveil the hidden. Learning that 1 + 1 may not be two and a square may not be just a square. Knowledge through culture has an abstract dimension that cannot be explained, but that is felt. Art is born, and the heartbeats!

BRIEF

Download the brief here on the competition day, July 3rd!

SCHEDULES and FEES

the beginning of the registration period: May 14th

Promotional registration period from May 14th to May 23rd at 23:59 – Fee € 25

Regular registration period from May 24th to June 22nd at 23:59 – Fee € 30

Late period of registration from June 23rd to July 3rd at 11:59 – Fee € 35

After the competition start – Fee € 50

Publication of winners and honorable mentions at www.if-ideasforward.com on September 1st

the competition date

July 3 to July 4

The competition begins on July 3rd 12:00 noon and ends at July 4th 12:00 noon (London GMT + 0:00)

AWARDS

1st Place € 500+ publication on the website, social networks and media partners + 24H free registration + 24h competition eBook

2nd Place € 150 – publication in website, social networks and media partners + 24H free registration + 24h competition eBook

3rd Place € 50 – publication in website, social networks and media partners + 24H free registration + 24h competition eBook

7 Honorable Mentions – publication in website, social networks and media partners

JURY

Will be announced soon!

The orgnisers used the Paypal payment system, if you want to use the system of BANK TRANSFER please send an email to info@if-ideasforward.com

Previously on e-architect:

24H Competition 2018

3 Aug 2018 24h competition 26th edition – Ocean

Ideasforward wants to give young creative people from around the world the opportunity to express their views of the future of societies through their innovative and visionary proposals. We are an experimental platform seeking progressive ideas that reflect on emerging themes. The eco design, sustainable architecture, new materials, concepts and technologies are compelling issues in the societies of the future and the involvement of the whole community is imperative.

In an era of globalization where communication was dominated by the technological revolution, there is the need to rethink the cities and how Man can relate in a global World as well as rethink the economic, social and cultural patterns of contemporary societies. The young creatives and thinkers are a precious commodity that we value a lot. We want to give them a voice.

AIM OF THE COMPETITION

24H A space where the time limit is used to stimulate your creativity. The aim of this competition is to present answers in 24h to social problems, visionary ideas, humanitarian causes and sociologic problems of the contemporary societies. Commitment, perseverance, inspiration and hard work are all the necessary bases to develop a proposal that meets the premises that will be released regularly in the brief of the competition. We challenge you to prove your talent in 24 hours! There is a period of registration on the competition, when it ends, starts the 24H competition! You have 24H to develop a proposal that responds to the program contained on the brief that will only be available on the same day the competition starts. Take the risk!

FRAMEWORK

ocean

The oceans are a part of the surface of the planet occupied by sea water that surrounds the continents and currently covers about 71% of the Earth, 361 million km2. Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, Antarctic and Arctic are their names. They give life and allow life with the 70% of oxygen they release into the atmosphere through the plankton that is in the sea. Once again, Man is destroying a good that is yours and precious … «We must save the oceans if we want to save mankind» Jacques Cousteau

the beginning of the registration period: August 1st Promotional registration period from August 1st to August 7th at 23:59 – Fee € 20 Regular registration period from August 8th to September 12th at 23:59 – Fee € 25 Late period of registration from September 13th to September 22th at 11:59 – Fee € 30 After the competition start – Fee € 50 Publication of winners and honorable mentions at www.if-ideasforward.com on October 24th the competition date //September 22th to September 23 // The competition begins on September 22th 12:00 noon and ends at September 23th 12:00 noon (London GMT + 0:00)

AWARDS

1st Place – € 500 + publication in website, social networks and media partners + 24H trophy + 24H registration fee 2nd Place – € 150 + publication in website, social networks and media partners + 24H trophy + 24H registration fee 3rd Place – € 50 + publication in website, social networks and media partners + 24H trophy + 24H registration fee 7 Honorable Mentions – publication in website, social networks and media partners

This is a competition in 24 hours so you only have access to the brief on the contest day Download on September 22th 12:00pm (noon) (London GMT+0:00).

CONDITIONS FOR PARTICIPATING

Participation can be individual or as a group. Participants must be over 18 years old. In the case of groups, the leader must be over 18 years old. By participating in an ideasforward contest the participant accepts all the terms and conditions published on our website that define the rules for use of the company website, as well as the rules of participation therein.

2 Mar 2018 24h competition 23rd edition – bigData

FRAMEWORK

Big Data Imagine something gigantic. Imagine something immeasurable. Imagine what can be bigger than the planet Earth. Imagine things. Let’s imagine the volume of what can not be accounted for. Imagine structures. Imagine the speed. Imagine the complexity. Let us imagine the variability. Imagine the variety. Imagine a dimension of information so big that wanting to account for it, is simply impossible. Imagine what is going on around us. Imagine what we can see and not see. Imagine information. Can we imagine the non-visible? Let’s imagine Big Data.

beginning of the registration period: February 19th Promotional registration period from February 19th to February 25th at 23:59 – Fee € 20€ Regular registration period from February 26th to March 27th at 23:59 – Fee € 25€ Late period of registration from March 28th to April 7th at 11:59 – Fee € 30€ During the competition period: Fee 50€

Publication of winners and honorable mentions at www.if-ideasforward.com on May 18th

The competition date // April 7th to April 8th // The competition begins at April 7th 12:00 noon and ends at April 8th 12:00 noon (London GMT + 0:00)

JURY

João Belo Rodeia, arq. Diogo Burnay, arq. António Câmara, prof. Pedro Vada, arq. Fatih Yavuz, arq.

This is a competition in 24 hours so you only have access to the brief on the contest day Download on April 7th 12:00pm (noon) (London GMT+0:00) but do not forget that you always have to register before April 7th at 11:49 am (London GMT + 0:00)

24h competition 21st edition – home

PROGRAM hometown house Objective: In this exercise you should draw your family house in your honetown. It´s not a simple house, it´s your family house. Program: – Make a program and justify it. – You should describe your family and her members in a general way. Numbers of members, sex, ages, etc. Create a narrative whose justify the intentions of your project. – Localization: your hometwon – Areas: not defined The panel must have a descriptive text of the proposal (English), concept, idea. Scale – Appropriate to the submitted elements.

1st Place – Team: Anna Maksimova, Anfisa Mishchenko; City: Moscow; Country: Russian Federation

24H Competition 21st edition

12 Dec 2017 fire 24H Competition

22th edition – fire

AIM OF THE COMPETITION – 24H

A space where the time limit is used to stimulate your creativity. This competition proposes give responses in 24H to the social problems, future visions, climate changes, humanitarian causes and sociologic problems of the contemporary societies.

Commitment, perseverance, inspiration and hard work are the necessary bases to develop a proposal that meets the premises that will be released regularly in the brief of the competition. We challenge you to prove your talent in 24 hours! There are a period of registration on the competition, when it end, started the 24H competition! You have 24H to develop a proposal that responds to the program contained on a brief that you only know on the same day that start competition. Take the risk!

FRAMEWORK

fire

Fire: extravagant, egocentric, impulsive, strong, irresponsible and adventurous. One of the 4 elements of nature and the greatest achievement of the human being, which allowed the survival of the species. With fire Man developed the protection, the comfort of cold nights, the search for light and discovered the cooked food. He controlled it for his own benefit, changed survival habits in a dramatic way, and nowadays, fire can be a symbol of destruction and danger, giving it a negative connotation, or a symbol of rebirth and renewal of forces divine. Fire can be heaven or hell, peace or war, a small ou big flame. One thing is certain, whoever plays with it can get burned.

beginning of the registration period: December 11th Promotional registration period from December 11th to December 15th at 23:59 – Fee € 15 Regular registration period from December16th to February 7th at 23:59 – Fee € 20 Late period of registration from February 8th to February 17th at 11:59 – Fee € 25

Publication of winners and honorable mentions at www.if-ideasforward.com on March 31th

The competition date // February 17th to February 18th // The competition begins at February 17th 12:00 noon and ends at February 18th 12:00 noon (London GMT + 0:00)

26 + 24 Nov 2017 biomimetic 24h competition

biomimetic – winners announced

1st place Team: Maël Barbe, Clémentine Huck City: Clermont-Ferrand Country: France

image courtesy of architects

Team: Nahid Akram City: California Country: United States

Team: Jack Francis, Rebecca Beer, Elina Savvas, Andrew Waller City: Portsmouth Country: United Kingdom

Honorable Mentions:

Team: Aleksandr Buzin, Ekaterina Sapina City: Moscow Country: Russian Federation

Team: Igor Augusto Almeida, Matheus Pardal, Thiago Zati, Carolina Pereira City: Santos Country: Brazil

Team: Pedro Feriotti, Bruno Lopes, Gustavo Teixeira, Leonardo Messias City: São Paulo Country: Brazil

Team: Luis Mariano, Uriel Patawaran, Justin Wee Eng, Erold Enriquez City: Makati City Country: Philippines

Team: Savu Bianca, Tutelca Sonia Cristina, Istrate Andreea City: Bucuresti Country: Romania

Team: Caitlin Paridy, Osman Bari City: Brantford Country: Canada

Team: Patrycja Czaplinska, Sara Czerwinska City: Wroclaw Country: Poland

24h competition 20th edition – biomimetic

FRAMEWORK

What does nature have to teach us? Do we need to perceive it better by copying it in search of perfection, or simply to understand the rules that govern it? Nature is multidisciplinary and everything seems to work effortlessly, because it is not designed to be perfect, but functional, non-toxic, adaptable and “alive” in form or function. Biomimetic is a new movement created by spontaneity and perpetuated by the need to create sustainability solutions. It is up to the human being to discover the powers and, with the right dose of utopia, to make it the best way to respect the nature of which we are all a part. Making it happen is the master key of these new doors ahead …

biomimetic All living forms present in nature carry mathematical formulas and quantifications. The interpretation of these forms can be the great achievement for architecture that, intelligently, should translate them into solutions and needs in a sustainable and functional strategy. Natural examples are biological inspirations of efficiency and aesthetic / functional balance. The way of looking at forms can finally awaken to the simplicity of what more complex exists on the face of the earth: life itself.

PROGRAM

collective housing

Objective: In this exercise we propose that nature be your inspiration. It is intended that you apply natural systems in the conceptual process of your project. More than simple patterns or coatings, you must understand these systems and apply them in your constructive process. We want that you see in the nature a solution for this building. Inspired by the principles of biomimetics, we challenge you to design a collective housing building.

Program: – You must define the population and the number of flats for your building. – You should think other spaces like services, shops, restaurants or others. – Localization: not defined – Areas: not defined

The panel must have a descriptive text of the proposal (English), concept, idea, etc. Scale – Appropriate to the submitted elements

RESULTS 1st Place – ID0001070 – Team: Maël Barbe, Clémentine Huck; City: Clermont-Ferrand; Country: France “Perceiving the desert as an environment suitable for human occupation in an increasingly denser world, Ecosystem of Desert finds inspiration in natural behaviors rather than natural forms, taking advantage of how animal and vegetal species deal with harsh conditions to create an auspicious context to human settlement. Cacti, termites and beetles are seen as natural models to, respectively, protecting living spaces from direct sun, providing air circulation and holding humidity – the project thus reflects not their appearances, but instead their processes, that is, the way they adapt to their own surroundings. ” Romullo Fontenelle, arq.

“The project deals with our nowadays Anthropocene era, climate change, and global population increase. Despite the UN prospects of 75% of the population will be living in urban settlements in 2050, the proposal takes advantage of an undesired territory to be colonized: the desert. A potential anchor for a future counterpoint of rural strategical development.

The structure proposed is a wise underground construction inspired in how live can developed strategies to survive in such extreme conditions. The beautiful drawing and poetical expression of the idea confronts with the simplicity of a telluric constructive act expressed in a symbolic object.” Jin Taira, arq.

“The proposal conceptualizes complex natural systems into clear design ideas, to give form to a collective housing oasis in the dessert. By taking into consideration contemporary issues to society such as over population, it successfully analyses and deploys adaptability to inhabited areas. ” Mario Vahos, arq.

“This project addresses a dystopian future where the climate and/or growth of the human population forces us to live in harsh desert conditions.

For such conditions, this entry has found some greats examples from nature in how to cope with overheating, unfertile land and water shortage. The design however needs to be further developed to make this convincing as architecture, even though the presentation is very nice.” Gerhard Linder, arq.

“The ‘Ecosystem of Desert’ is most creative and innovative design which presents clear solution and direction with very poetic but powerful visual representation. The suggestive section and simple diagrams show how the new ecosystem performs as collective housing.” Chang Kyu Lee, arq.

2nd Place – ID000480 – Team: Nahid Akram; City: California; Country: United States “Polyp – a symbio-mimetic module creates living spaces in probably one of the most intricate urban contexts in contemporary world: war-torn cities. Taking advantage of the enormous amount of rubble left by the conflicts and finding inspiration in the “mutually beneficial relationship between algae and modern corals”, the project is based on the idea of converting debris into architecture – what in a broader sense refers to cyclical processes found in nature in which living species dye, are transformed into mineral and organic substances, to be combined again into new forms of life in a continuous cycle. ” Romullo Fontenelle, arq.

“The project has a double direction. An inspirational study of polyps and the development of a collective dwelling created of prefab modules. A proper solution to provide shelter for people subject of impact hazards. Despite the interest of both ideas, and the potential benefit to human race, is unclear the impact influence of the polyp in the final formal configuration of the unit module typology or the resultant unit- conglomerate block in patio configuration. Habitat, designed by architect Moshe Safdie in 1967 was considered a potential project for the future, but the path proposed was only partially adopted. Maybe, our critical present will bring again the revival of high-density and compact prefab construction systems.”Jin Taira, arq.

“The proposal provides an innovative solution to the rebuilding of war-torn areas by the use of modular units as shelters and working areas. The reproduction of this rational building unit by the re-use of materials on-site responds to the precarious situation of war, and gives an alternative solution to temporary housing systems. ” Mario Vahos, arq.

““Polyp” addresses one of the imminent global challenges, how to rapid provide shelter and rebuild parts of civilization that has been hit by disaster. Using the symbioses between coral and algae as inspiration for the reuse and remaking of building ruins, is both very creative and sustainable, regardless of the realism. This project also manages to go beyond pure idea, to the design of the single units. This design allows adding parts to the units to adopt to changing needs, thus making the design even more flexible. Finally, all the units add up to a large complex, a building block that has a distinctive expression and architecture which could be a part of the urban fabric. The presentation is precise and beautiful, a contrast to the horrors this concept emerged from. ” Gerhard Linder, arq.

“The modular and recycling system drives this proposal energetic and effective idea to illustrate competition theme, ‘Biomimetic’. The reproduction of processing unit not only creates a new image of human habitants, but also allows human survive in nutrient-poor environments. ” Chang Kyu Lee, arq.

3rd Place – ID0001110 – Team: Jack Francis, Rebecca Beer, Andrew Waller; City: Portsmouth; Country: United Kingdom “In a more literal way than the two other winners, the project A Living Resilience finds in the pinecone and its particular form and natural behavior the inspirations to design a building capable to protect its own inner spaces from the cold night and assure maximum solar gain during the day. A series of moving scales closes and opens according to the time of the day, creating adequate living spaces for its inhabitants in harsh environments – more and more common in an out of balance world.” Romullo Fontenelle, arq.

“As the projects before, the proposal, consequently with nowadays global climate change condition, supports the philosophy of intervention in the sensitive concept of resilience. Maybe the most formally biomimetic project of the three awarded ones, structures a collective housing and green tower based in the fibonacci geometry to produce a gigantic pinecone. The responsive façade solution follows an important direction in current innovative technology construction that has being successfully built in extreme climates as the Al Bahar Towers in Abu Dhabi (Aedas, 2012).” Jin Taira, arq.

“The proposal successfully interprets the need for adaptable and dynamic structures that can respond to natural conditions. It studies the Fibonacci sequence and uses the shape of a pinecone as inspiration to the design of a dynamic building structure, which responds and blends with its surroundings. By adapting its shape, it optimizes energy gains and reduces the need for external sources of energy. ” Mario Vahos, arq.

“”Organic” suggests the use of Chitin as the main building component. Chitin is a strong biopolymer found in crabs and shellfish. The material is 100% recyclable and given the right tools it could be used for 3D printing. The idea of a crane size 3D printer is seductive. The building design is interesting and shows potential, but need to be further developed. The presentation however is convincing.” Gerhard Linder, arq.

“Interesting Octagonal floor layout and composition. The dynamic mechanism makes the proposal very unique concept and solution which starts from Pinecone and Fibonacci numbers to growth of human life. The ‘A Living Resilience’ is able to change and adapt through interacting with the environment.” Chang Kyu Lee, arq.

Honorable Mentions ID0001120 – Team: Aleksandr Buzin, Ekaterina Sapina; City: Moscow; Country: Russian Federation

ID000910 – Team: Igor Augusto Almeida, Matheus Pardal, Thiago Zati, Carolina Pereira; City: Santos; Country: Brazil

ID000210 – Team: Pedro Feriotti, Bruno Lopes, Gustavo Teixeira, Leonardo Messias; City: São Paulo; Country: Brazil

ID000920 – Team: Luis Mariano, Uriel Patawaran, Justin Wee Eng, Erold Enriquez; City: Makati City; Country: Philippines

ID000670 – Team: Savu Bianca, Tutelca Sonia Cristina, Istrate Andreea; City: Bucuresti; Country: Romania

ID000190 – Team: Caitlin Paridy, Osman Bari; City: Brantford; Country: Canada

ID000340 – Team: Patrycja Czaplinska, Sara Czerwinska; City: Wroclaw; Country: Poland

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[13623]

My 100 favorite memories of Jonghyun

Hi, my name is Gui. This is my personal gift for my beloved SHINee World, a community I've been a part of and truly felt safe and appreciated in for over 7 years now. I've compiled a list of my personal favorite 100 memories and stories about Jonghyun, which will be listed in no particular order. I hope these videos, photos and words of our precious Jonghyun will make you smile and remember all the gifts he gave us the years we got to spend with him.

My sincere wish is for the world to remember his music and how much of a bright, intelligent, caring, silly and all around beautiful person he was. Below the cut you'll find the list with links to see or read the mentioned picture/video/tweet/etc, all with their corresponding english translations (if I was able to find them).

Thank you, Jonghyun. God knows how much I love you and how much I'll miss you. You were a blessing to me and so many people, I'll remember you forever. You've worked incredibly hard. And thank you again. 

1- For whatever reason, the first thing that came to mind was that time you and Key wore masks of Kate Middleton and prince William while walking around an airport. You two have always been silly on your own, but together you were something else entirely. [link]

2- How you always wished for the members' health at every opportunity you encountered. [link]

3- Your satisfaction every time Yoogeun obeyed you or showed you affection [link]

4- That out of respect and to keep a sense of unity among the members you based the design for the cover of BASE in that of ACE's. [link]

5- How sincere and genuine you always tried to be before the world. [link - trans in comments] 

6- Whenever you engaged fight mode and showed the furious and volatile aries boy you were on the inside. Variety shows didn’t deserve you love! [link]

7- Those days you showcased your fansites' names on your body with so much pride during Internet War performances. [link]

8- KRUMP!! KRUMP!!!!!!! [link]

9- How fucking cheesy you were. We all know Minho is probaby the cheesiest man on Earth but you somehow managed to overdo him from time to time. [link] 10- The love you had for your sister and how your face lit up whenever you talked about her. [link]

11- The birthday you spent here in Argentina. I remember thinking you looked a bit out of it during the concert, a bit sad even until the very last talking break started. I remember the moment when they brought out the cake and you put your hands together to make your wish (that was, of course, for the members to stay healthy), that was the first time I thought you looked genuinely happy that night. I feel so so so honored to had been able to design the support banners we held up during that last speaking segment so you could read them and smile. For so many argentinian shawols that was the best day of their lives. I hope you know that. [link]

12- That time you asked the staff to turn down the lights so you could see how bright and beautiful the pearl aqua sea looked that night. [link]

13- Your inconditional love towards your fans. “Thanks to SHINee World I can breathe” [link]

14- How in One fine day you were the first one to celebrate the fact that you were all travelling alone, but also the first one to admit you missed the other memebers [link]

15- Your infinite love for your trusty sidekick Roo, all the pictures, videos and tweets you've done with and about her through the years, bullying and all <3 And the fact that your bond was an inspiration while writting "End of a day"! [link] 16- That moving message a fan with synesthesia sent you during a Blue Night broadcast in which they talked about the fact that your voice looked "golden" to them~ [link]

17- How you were always the first one to volunteer and show interest in any game or competition that was happening. [link]

18- Your cute exchanges with Key during Hello performances <3 [link]

19- The fact that you were A LIVING MEME [link]

20- That time you bought a birthday present for Key and he was so excited he recorded the whole thing LMAO [link]

21- How you respected your own feelings, especially the not so positive ones. You didn't ignore them, instead you let them stay with you while you processed them and until they could finally left your heart. [link] 22- Your enthusiasm when it came to dressing up for SM Halloween parties, and the costumes you decided to wear like the freaking weeaboo you were [link]

23- Speaking of weeaboos, I also remember your kid-like excitement when you saw Gundam action figures and attractions during your trip in Japan [link] 24- The Hello Baby skits and your... excelent? acting and narrating skills [link]

25- Your tweets asking fansites to send you HQ pictures whenever they uploaded previews you liked (or found hilarious) [link]

26- Your interest in fashion, most likely started by Kibum, that resulted in that cool and characteristic style of yours [link]

27- The absolute adventure that was getting your first bike and learning how to ride it [link]

28- Your adorable height complex, especially in relation to Minho and his 3 meter-long legs [link]

29- Speaking of your height, remember that time he asked to sat down between two tall MCs? [link]

30- Your (attempt at a) message for your mom the day of your debut, that not-so-surprisingly ended with you crying. Key has said he regrets not hugging you and comforting you back then... not because he was interested in making you feel better or anything, but because this video is always shown at events and he feels like it makes him look bad [link]

31- Your sensitivity towards smells and your love for scented candles [link]

32- When you all won the 2013 Melon Artist of The Year award and ran holding hands towads the stage (which was obviously your idea, that's how cheesy you were). You cried so much you dumbass, it was so incredibly adorable and endearing. What a year 2013 was for SHINee GODDAMNNNN [link]

33- The absolute gift you had when it came to pouring your emotions into songs, and the respect that caused in so many members of the industry [link]

34- Lollipop!Jonghyun which caused many a heart attack to members of the fandom back in 2011 [link]

35- Your genuine happiness when japanese fans came up to you to ask for autographs while walking around Tokio, something you weren't used to - no even in your home country [link]

36- How you were "Taemin's firs mom". So proud of our maknae always! [link] 

37- Your visual support for the LGBTQ+ community in a country and society so retrograde in so many ways. And whenever you fucked up you always acknowledged your mistakes, apologized and tried to make things right. [link]

38- The fact that you promoted SHINee 24/7... like that time when you came up to a foreigner presenting yourself as a member of SHINee, and it turned out that dude was actually world famous actor Jack Black. [link]

39- When you asked to stop the van you were on because you recognized the stadium in which SHINee made their debut in Japan, and you wanted to get out and see it again [link]

40- The fact that your #fitspo back in the day was Taylor Lautner in Twilight LMAO [link]

41- That time you became The Listerine Dude™ [link] and the aftermath of all your free promo... [link]

42- Your strange need to bite everything and everyone at all times for no good reason [link]

43- Your, uhm... art skills? [link] [link]

44- When you voted for Taemin through text messages and asked !!with urgency!! for the SHINee World to do the same [link]

45- Your legendary meme battle with Minho on Twitter [link]

46- This live performance, which is my absolute favorite performance of my favorite SHINee song, Sleepless Night. I remember watching the video of the first interpretation you did of the song over and over again... I fell in love with the song instantly. You liked making me cry, didn’t you? [link]

47- When you went to comfort Key after seeing him cry only to end up crying yourself. After that, you hugged each member individually in such a genuine and caring way... you absolute angel...  [link]

48- When you finally realized the mole in your chest was a national treasure and you started showing it more and more in your selcas [link] [link]

49- How much you loved your beautiful omma! [link]

50- "As always, I need you" [link] [link] 

51-  That time when, after receiving many homophobic comments and threats following the first Internet War performance, you decided to silently change your twitter profile picture to one of that performance, and you didn't change it for the longest time. An iconic moment in music history. Truly revolutionary. [link]

52- Your love and respect for all the other SM artists [link]

53-... but especially, for your girls f(x) [link]

54- When you read and commented on tweets from shawols that were doing live commentary/translations of shows or events the other members were taking part of and you couldn't attend [link]

55- I’m sorry but these pictures??? this entire video???? I don’t think you’ve ever looked softer in your life dear [link]

56-  "I look like a monster" [link]

57- The fact that even when in moments when you were surrounded by love and affection, you never forgot about those going through difficult times [link]

58- "IS THIS THE REALITY YOU WANTED!?" [link] 

59- That time you casually killed us all with this goddamn selca [link]

60- When you found out about those pictures Key and Minho took of you while you were asleep, and decided to have some fun yourself [link]

61- And speaking of trolling, your response to the reveal of the cover for Misconceptions of us was absolute gold [link]

62- This live performance of Selene 6.23 which is absolutely breathtaking. You worked so hard, gorgeous. [link]

63- When you refused to accept the fact that you looked like a dinosaur, saying that you looked like a... a puppy-saurus...? [link]

64- When you randomly invited a group of korean shawols in Japan to take pictures with you, to stand close to you and yell from excitement together [link]

65- When you voted FOR YOURSELF to win first place and bragged about it on twitter [link]

66- The infamous ugly face competition you five had a few years ago [link]

67- That time you literally dedicated a song called "I hate them" to couples in love [link]

68- The absurd song you wrote about the fact that even cockroaches have a significant other and you don't. Am I... sensing a theme here... [link]

69- How you weren't afraid or embarrassed when your emotions were too much for you and you felt like crying. How you challenged the way people thought males should express their emotions.

70- Your sweet and charming voice in She is, my favorite solo song of yours [link] 

71- Knowing how much you enjoyed and how much it helped you being a DJ in Blue Night Radio, a space where you could share other people's stories as well as your own feelings and personal projects [link]

72- When you drew a layout of your brain during an episode of Hello Baby, including the small but key element of "Insignificant Choi Minho" [link]

73- That time you mentioned having watched all star wars films (prequels and all oh dear) and that you were failing to understand Anakin's heart the entire time. Me too Jjong, me too [link]

74- When you quickly made a pun while having to immitate/act like Jinki, the most Jinki-like thing you could've ever done [link]

75- This particular performance of A-Yo! I remember watching it over and over again when it was originally uploaded on youtube and feeling happy just from seeing you all smile and have fun together [link]

76- Your appreciation for fanart and fanartists! [link]

77- How you had to pet and take a picture with every goddamn dog you came across

78- How you would look after your fans and tried to make them feel better about their everyday struggles. You were a being made of light, so incredibly sympathetic - which was probably my favorite personality trait of yours. [link]

79- Your beautiful voice and sIcK aCTing SkillZ during that intro you did for the acoustic Juliette performance back in 2009 [link]

80- How badly you actually wanted to date and have a girlfriend. You were desperate in the cutest way possible. [link] [link]

81- I remember my jaw dropping to the floor (... and swearing a lot afterwards) the first time I saw this picture of you from the Everybody photoshoot. Did you know you were hands down the prettiest human on planet earth to me? Did you? [link]

82- Whatever the hell this was...  [link]

83- That dream I had a few years ago, where we were listening a band play live at some sort of outdoors music festival. I was sitting down in the grass and you were lying down with your head on my lap. It was quite a short dream and it didn't have a meaningful ending to it or anything, but I remember feeling a weird sense of peace and serenity when I woke up. That's what your presence has always made me feel and what it continues to.

84- How beautiful your voice sounds in One for me, another one of my favorite SHINee songs of all time. I sure fell for you whenever I first heard that song 7+ years ago, it’s one that fits your pretty voice very well. [link]

85- How you wanted to be able to play every instrument under the sun; your love for music and the music making process. You haven't received so many compliments and gained so much respect from people in the industry for nothing! [link] [link]

86- That time you practically threw youself at Big Bang's Seungri while SHINee were accepting an award [link] 

87- How hard you tried to sing LLO with an MJ flavour but Jinki wouldn’t stop teasing you about it [link]

88- How you behaved during fansigns, the way you always listened patiently and with a warm smile to what your fans wanted to say. [link]

89- The extent of your trust in shawols, and the few moments when you really pushed those limits resulting in some of the sweetest moments ever between SHINee and SHINee World [link]

90- Your love for videogames, something you talked about multiple times throughout the years and an activity that truly made you happy [link]

91- How introspective you were and how you always thought on ways to better yourself and learn from your mistakes [link]

92- Those instances when you decided to take a short break from making fun of the other members and made fun of yourself instead [link]

93- How perfect you and the rest of the members sounded in this live performance of Moon River Waltz [link]

94- I’ve lost count of the amount of times I've seen this video of you guys singing in the car throught the years... [link]

95- When the five of you encouraged shawols to sing along the last bit of Replay, and their singing was so loud and overwhelming you couldn't help yourself and went ahead and cried a lot (again) [link]

96- That time you said the most important part of the choreography for Everybody was literally "your face" [link]

97- How passionately you sang even in the earliest days of your career. Anyone can tell your voice was made for singing balads dear [link]

98- When you and Minho were annoying the heck out of Taemin and completely stole the show during an episode of We Got Married [link]

99- The moment I found out SHINee was going to hold a concert in Argentina on your 25th birthday. We worked so hard for all of you to come here, I was so excited, my god... Turning back time isn't something I'm particularly interested in but I do wish I could've done more for you that day. For all of five you. I sincerely hope you enjoyed your concert here and that it wasn't too exhausting or that much of a burden to you.

100- How deeply it moved you when Minho showed up as a surprise guest during your last day as a DJ for Blue Night Radio, and the lovely words you two exchanged. [link] 

I hope looking at these can help some of you get through difficult times and remeber who Jonghyun truly was, how complex of a human being he was and how much he loved his members, his family and us shawols. May he rest in peace. We love you Jjong, you did well.