#penge manifestation

[xinyuehui]

This is my new favourite picture of them (ㅅ´ ˘ `)

[nexusnyx]

from eden

Joel Miller x f!Reader [3.3k] Summary: The nightmares left when you started sharing Joel's bed, but that never meant they were gone. When you have your first episode in his presence, Joel's right there. He's there, all around you, inside you, comforting you. It's so different than all the other desperate times you two became one that you wonder how much of it is meant to soothe you, and how much was a need of his.

— A/n 📝This was written because I had a nightmare and no Joel to comfort me, so I'm being self-indulgent to the max. You're welcome. Reblogs and comments make all the difference. — Warnings⚠️ mature content—explicit depictions of sex, so minors dni. | 🏷️ age gap, established relationship, morning sex, comfort sex, nightmares, soft!Joel, making out, dirty talking, fingering, missionary sex, prone bone, overstimulation, creampie (practice safe sex y'all).

ㅤㅤㅤㅤmasterlist | read on ao3

Before you, his sleep was non-existent. Restless, a black out, a body function that hit him when Joel reached his limit. It was achieved through scotch, overworking himself, and sometimes, when the date offered no other alternative, pills.

Now, Joel sleeps — okay. He rests.

Drool on his pillow, body waking up with the feeling of new, sometimes even going as far as dreaming. It's insanity, and although he's only had it for months, Joel's terrified of how addicted to it he is.

No matter how great the sleep is, it's still light. Always will be — there's no deep sleep at the end of the world, and when you stir in his arms, Joel wakes up in a second, only to notice this is nothing like the other times; he regains consciousness and is taken by your panic like a cold shower, and in a second, he's alert.

"Baby — hey, hey," he whispers your name, calling you back to him. "Wake up." He repeats your name louder, and you awake in a pained gasp, which echoes in him. "Hey — baby. C'mere."

At first, the shock stops you from abiding by his words.

All you can feel is the hot peng in your chest still echoing from the images passing like a movie before your eyes, the hot ache enveloping all your middle from the sense of alert danger alert, but Joel is patient as you breathe through those seconds. His palms rub both your arms, and he keeps his distance, his breath steady, his eyes set on you firm despite their hazy sleepiness. Once, Joel could barely sleep heavily enough to get rest, and now, he woke with sleep still clouding the edges of his visions.

Because of you. Because of — "Baby," he whispers again. This time, his voice lands somewhere conscious and your gaze meets his. "There you are." His digits apply gentle pressure on your arms to see if your body has relaxed enough to be guided by him and sure enough, you feel the slight pull as a port and sink your anchor into him.

Your upper body sags on his, falling on his touch.

You wished for radio silence. For something to come and take away the pain, the lingering feeling of those worries your subconscious manifested as horrible pictures to dissipate.

And it comes. In the shape of Joel's hand gripping your nape and his other hand wrapping around your waist to pull you even closer, comfort arrives.

"Shhhhh." Only when he shushes you the sound of your whimpering register — you're crying. Wetting his sleeping shirt. Still shaking. "I've got you."

He repeats those three precious words more times until you've calmed down. However long that takes. All you know is that one moment you can barely think beyond what you saw in those dreams and next, you're wiping your cheeks on your forearms and looking at Joel through your wet lashes.

He feels your eyes on him, turns around and flicks the lamp by the bed on.

Faint yellow light illuminates his features amidst all the darkness, and you breathe.

"You're alright," it slips out. You almost cry again, biting at your bottom lip since you're unable to bite your own words back, or swallow them now that they're out in the open.

Joel's brows crease in confusion for only a moment, and then it hits him. It was about him. "I'm alright." The claim erases every ounce of weight left in your chest. "C'mere," he pulls you closer, and you take the invite.

Stradling his lap is your favorite thing, even if you're still shy to do it; the level of desire and attraction you have for Joel is embarrassing, the effect he has on you and how desperate you are for every crumb of his touch and affection should make you ashamed. All it does is make you blush, or occasionally stutter.

Joel takes it all with a good heart. He adjusts your body in his lap, resting his face on your shoulder, and then breathes in deeply.

Breathes out.

After blissful moments like this, he asks. "Feeling better?"

With you, always. "Yeah." You want to look at him, but his neck is where Joel smells the most like himself, and it makes you a bit drunk. Sleep is long gone from your body — that's what a few touches from him can do. "You always know how to help."

Joel chuckles and the huff of breath tickles your neck. "All I did was shush and hold you."

"I know. That's perfect."

Joel would ask if you want to talk about the nightmares, but no one does. He starts petting your hair. "Think you can get back to sleep?"

You shake your head.

His head tilts. What do you want, then? "Still thinking about it?"

His question makes you double-check, and — no. You shake your head. "Just..." Instead of answering, you show him.

A roll of your hips, and the surprised groan it pulls out of him makes the hint of a smile show on your face.

He put you on his lap. That's all you needed to go from asleep to wide awake. Or at least, I want you awake.

"Fuck—," Joel's fingers dig deeper and hard into your waist. "'s what so?"

You nod. "Can we?"

"Can we what?" Joel asks, because while few people know it, he's a little shit.

"You know what," you whine. "Wanna feel you. Please?"

The way you whine brings out something borderline animalistic in Joel.

It took him by surprise every single time — it was a hook you had, an energetic and magnetic pull that turned Joel towards you almost on instinct.

Joel goes from being half-asleep to reeling about all the ways he wants to taste you. It should be over by now, the stupid flutter in his stomach whenever you kiss him like this, devour his oxygen in a starved and greedy way, but they only amplify somehow.

All he does is kiss you for a while.

Joel sighs into your mouth and licks around your soft whimpers. He feels overwhelmed — with only a few rolls of your hips and the desperate tightening of your legs on both of his sides and he's hard as a rock. Straining against his briefs, wetting a spot on it because you're rocking against him and all but melting against his hand on your hair.

When he pulls back for air, Joel has to just look.

He grabs a fistful of your hair by the nape and pulls your head back as gently as he can — you mewl. Whine coming out scratchy, on the back of your throat, and he sort of smiles.

It's on his face. He can feel the tugging on his lips at the sight in front of him. There's the faintest notion of light coming through the windows, the early signs of night dissipating, and they illuminate you just right. Soft, royal blue lights illuminate the contour of your cheekbones, and Joel needs to see more.

Wants to. He lets go of your hair and tugs on your shirt—no, on his shirt, taking it off with your help.

Usually, Joel's talkative from the start. He discovered you have a thing for his voice early on and lost the ability to shut the fuck up ever since. Your words, not his.

Usually, it's not this, though—not this slow, or this reverent.

One of Joel's hands keeps running through your body, smoothing out all the exposed skin, and he can tell by your body that the touch is relaxing.

Then, you break the silence by leaning your upper body, closing the space between your heads. "Joel," you whisper in his mouth. "Wanna suck you off."

The one thing you love doing to distract yourself—he'd allow it, but something's tugging at him to offer more than just distraction.

Joel wants to offer you comfort.

He closes the gap and kisses your eager and waiting lips, tasting you again before answering, "Not now, baby."

You whine, squeezing your thighs around him. "Why not?"

He remembers something and runs his hands over your ass as he talks, massaging and squishing the flesh. "You told me I could touch you as much as I wanted to, remember?" He gets his fingers under the ban of your panties, squeezing harder. "On our night, you told me I could always do you like I wanted, right baby?" Joel seals his lips on yours again in a harsh kiss as both of you recall the night. The first night. The one you two deemed 'your' night. He pulls back. "Was so filthy that night, baby—"

"Wanted you for so long—" and shit, that gets to him.

Joel spins both of you around and lays your back to the mattress again, rocking his hips with yours. "Dunno what you see in me, baby—" you poked him hard on his side, mean and pointy and hard, and Joel looks up to see you frowning at him. Right—no shit-talking himself in your presence. He chuckles, and grabs your chin, tilting your head up so he licks a stripe down your jugular. "My bad — 'm thinking about how fuckin' lucky I was and started off on the wrong end of it."

"Damn right you did — oh." The gasp you let out loud is matched by his cursing.

Joel pushed your panties to the side, taking advantage of the lack of clothes in way, and all he wanted was to check. Instead, he gets his fingers soaked in all of your wetness. Just from kissing. Just for him. "All for me, baby? Jesus fuckin' Christ." Joel runs two, three fingers between your folds, wetting his digits before he starts thumbing your clit. "I love your mouth on me, y'know that. Always get So messy. Do it just like — I like it. But I just wanna see you feel good right now."

"Joel."

He had no idea where it came from, but his brain paints the picture for him.

Your eyes wide, twitching with fear.

It'd been a while since he saw that. Matter-of-factly, Joel was sure now he'd never seen that expression on you before. He would know — the long days Joel spent cataloging ever line, wrinkle, freckle on your body; he was no stranger to your nature. Joel walked into your deepest and darkest woods, and whatever nightmare woke you up today, it was a new storm brewing.

You're alright, you had said.

Joel sinks his fingers inside you as he sinks his mouth on your neck, seeking comfort in you at the same beat as he's trying to offer it.

You clench around him, and Joel sighs when your nails dig at his back. It's not just his voice you like. Joel stops thinking about all the reasons why you could be afraid and focuses on making you forget there's a world to fear. "Like my fingers, don't ya?" he rasps out, inching his face back so he can share the same breath as you.

"So thick," you babble out, thighs spreading wider for him.

Joel wasted many hours in front of mirrors convincing himself he was past the futilities of caring about appearance, attraction, and things of the such. However, all you needed to do was this:

"Joel, oh god, Joel," like a prayer. Eyes closed, rolling at the back of your head, like a surrender. The way you forced them back open just to look at him, and your mouth gaped open — Joel could feel the lust oozing off of you. "So fuckin' handsome, Joel. You look so good fucking me."

He growls, pulsing his fingers in a curve inside of you, abusing the spot he knows to be carved only to break your mind. Designed to make you see stars.

"So flatterin'," he laughs, sucking on your abused lips. "You make me feel handsome," he confesses, milking the trembling in your body that he recognizes quite well. "That's it — let it all go for me, baby."

Your first orgasm cums in a silent scream, as you let his fingers guide you into white bliss.

Joel moans unabashedly as you ride it out. He kisses your jaw since your lips are too busy hanging open, frozen around the letters of his name.

"Joel—too much, too much," you cry out, and he takes out his fingers from inside. He guides them to your mouth, and you part your lips. So obedient it drives him nuts.

"Lick 'em clean," he orders softly. He watches you do it, and imagines it's his cock inside of his fingers, but he has to prioritize now. He wants you in that way he knows it drives you wild — the way it pulls at your animalistic instincts and gets you screaming into the pillow. "Turn around, baby, c'mon."

It's like you know.

You do. Your eyes widen for a second and you moan for him before readjusting your body under him.

He grabs his own pillow to position underneath your hips when you lay with your belly down, settles his legs outside of yours and does his best not to drop his whole weight on you just yet.

"More, more," you whine for him. You want more of his weight — lord knows why, but you enjoy being smothered by him. Joel gives you just a little more and pulls your hair away from your face so he look at you. "Please don't tease me."

He wanted to. God, Joel really wanted to be strong — and young — enough to tease you until you were crying; sometimes, when he was rested enough, when you riled him up just right, when the adrenaline was high, or when something clicked and the air sizzled with a tension between you two, then he could.

Joel could make you cum two, or three times, before he put it in.

Other times, you were both starving for it.

He positioned himself at your entrance and pushed just the head in, wishing he was less riled up, but finding comfort that you were right there with him.

"Joel," you beg.

He smiles, and slides it all the way in. It's so wet, and so tight, and he's so, so fucked.

He praises your name. Catches his breath on your sweaty shoulder, and sucks on the back of your neck.

When you whine for more, this time, he truly has no words.

All Joel does is enjoy the way you're a mess with him.

He starts at a slow pace, pulling out the way out so he can enjoy the drag of it getting back inside. He does that until his arms are aching with the effort of keeping himself upright, and then he's lowering himself further, enjoying how much louder you get.

"Tell me if it's too much," he pleas in your ear.

"Faster, need it faster," is all you have to say back to him.

Joel abides. He gives it to you just how you want it, and he knows you're about to cum again before you start blabbering about it.

"Oh, god—'m gonna, Joel—right there—"

"Here, hm?" He bucks his hips harder, and is rewarded with your moans getting higher. "Fuckin' love findin' your sport, baby. Clenching — so fuckin' tight around me."

"'m gonna cum —"

"Oh, I know baby — clenchin' so fuckin' hard around me. Do it." He grabs your hair again and tells himself to hold it back. "Cum around my cock. Show me how bad — you love — when I give this pussy — what it deserves."

It's a mess of tangled libs and sweat from then on.

You convulse around Joel, your whole body trembling. With thighs still shaking, Joel pulls out and flips you around so he can see your face. He lines up and cups your face with the other hand, "Can I, baby?"

You nod with tears streaming down your face. "Please," it's only a whisper. "Please use me. Wanna—"you push your hips down, and Joel sinks it all the way in, making both of you moan. "Yes. Need your cum, too — need it so much."

Joel was teetering on the edge when he started fingering you and watched pleasure take over you. The minute that thin layer of sweat started covering your curves, he wanted to paint your back in his release. Wanted to bury himself to the hilt inside of you.

So he does.

Joel brackets your face between his forearms, and looks you in the eyes as he fucks into you. Not for the first time, he looks deep into you — switches his gaze between the place where your bodies connect to your face, and it's in your silent plea of his name that Joel loses himself.

He sees you starting to lose it — his sides are carved and marked, painted in red by your clawing and scratching, and he knows you're overstimulated from orgasms so close to each other, so Joel knows it'll be easy to do what he loves.

Make you cry out of pleasure.

When he feels his balls tightening, Joel starts to take longer thrusts to make his pelvis stimulate your clitoris at the same time as his hips meet yours. He lets out a loud moan at the feeling of your walls constricting, and, "'m gonna cum, baby, fuckin' hell—"

"Do it, do it do it, Joel, please—"

"Fuck, beg more. Beg."

The litany of pleas falling from your mouth is drawn out in white noise when Joel cums harder than in a long time, spilling hot and deep inside of you. Filling you up a lot. Fuck—he cums so much that the aftershocks last for minutes; precious time that he spends caressing your hair and enjoying your legs trembling in spasms of sensitivity.

Joel grunts a lot. To pull out it's the hardest — your whine gets him to shush and coo, "Shhhh, 's okay baby, 's okay." He peppers your face in kisses to replace from the sudden emptiness. "'m here."

"Don't leave."

"Won't," he licks under your jaw and gets out from on top of you. Grabs the closest piece of clothing to clean between your thighs and to get rid of most of the mess, then throws it far away for the two of you to deal with in some hours.

When he pulls you to his chest, Joel feels content.

He can feel your heart beating. The steady, strong pulse soothing into something calm.

With both chests touching, Joel recognizes when your breathings harmonize.

He smiles, wondering if you already fell asleep.

You haven't. "You're such a dream, Joel." The words are whispered against his chest, where your lips are. Over the sternum of his collarbone, touching it feather-light. The words make crawl through his skin and as soon as they make contact with his ribcages, they start growing there. A dream.

He understood the feeling. You were a dream. He hugs you tighter, wishing he burns this tender blue-lit moment in his mind to always come back to when he needs comfort. (When you're not around.)

"You're a dream, too, baby."

For a second, he wonders if you heard it. Then, he feels it.

A smile on his skin.

A dream or not, you two are in the same haze. That's all he needs. Let him sleep for good if it's like this — with you. In your arms.

🏷️ @sakuralikestars — @mostardentily — @thegreat-annamaria — @leiticia — @polyglot-noodle — @casssiopeia — @earthtocharlene — @levylovegood — @lavenderhhze — @gracie7209 — @waywardwolfbonklight — @shadytalething — @sanzusmile —@yesimwriting — @celestialstar111 💖

⚠️ if anyone being tagged would like to not be, just let me know in my inbox (which you can also use to talk to me about all the appeals of Joel Miller with his hair slicked back. Just saying hehe.

[loneberry]

Yi Yi by Edward Yang

Kaili Peng (wife of Yang) + Haden Guest, Sean Yang (son)

This film has been on my watchlist for ages. When I saw the Harvard Film Archive was doing an Edward Yang retrospective, I waited to watch a glorious 35 mm print. The film was introduced by Yang's wife, pianist Kaili Peng, and son, Sean Yang. Sean spoke of his father's early death, about only getting to know his dad through his films. After the screening Kaili describe Yi Yi as a "prelude to his own passing," his last "love letter to the world." She described Yang as a moody and passionate person, prone to bouts of anger. Yet while making Yi Yi, he was always in a good mood--that "sweetness" (her word) is captured in the tone of the film. 

Why is it that the films of the Taiwan New Cinema + Second New Wave (especially Tsai Ming-liang) capture urban alienation so powerfully? What is the root of this melancholia? You'd think Taipei was the loneliest place in the world. I don't know. Maybe it is. I've never been, even though my father immigrated from Taiwan and I've long wanted to go there to scatter my grandfather's ashes. 

Yi Yi contains sadness and levity in equal measure. In that sense it is true to life. The adult characters are haunted by their disappointments. Min-Min is plagued by a lack of meaning she tries to counter with Buddhist retreats. NJ is troubled by the counterfactuals of his life—the career he did not pursue, the great love he abandoned, who he encounters 30 years later. The children repeat the disappointments of their parents, continuing the cycle, ad infinitum. Strange, the night before watching Yi Yi, I watched Abbas Kiarostami's Where Is the Friend's House?. Both films stage an encounter between a child and an elderly person as a way to meditate on life and time. In both films there is affinity between the child and old person, who exist on the outer edges of the life cycle. Yes, you can't help but feel, watching Yi Yi, that the little boy Yang-Yang is an old soul (see the films final lines). Yang-Yang is the film's comic relief. I love what that boy sees—the photographs he takes of the backs of people's heads, how I dreamed them (see the photos that open my Sunflower book). 

Ting-Ting, too, is beautiful in her loneliness. Her guilt, her insomnia. She dreams of relief: "Now that you've forgiven me, I can sleep." 

How am I supposed to address the dying? Every soliloquy to the comatose grandma is the character confronting themselves. NJ mumbles that speaking to someone in a coma is like praying. Do they hear you? Are your words sincere? 

The way the film is shot, too, adds to the feeling that the characters are self-enclosed. Much of the action takes place in cramped interiors. The camera is often placed outside the building or train, just beyond the windows, giving you the feeling the they are ensheathed by glass. The window becomes a nexus between the interior and exterior: in the glass we can see what is happening outside at the same time we are observing the facial expressions of the characters. The headlights of the nighttime traffic dance on a woman's face. This is truly the hand of a director with a powerful vision.

Kaili said, after the screening, that Edward's autobiography is manifest in many of the characters. Edward was turned down from piano lessons, as was NJ. The music only meant something to him after the first time he fell in love. 

What can I say. It's a beautiful film. Watch it.

[Read more film reviews on my Letterboxd.]

[feddy-34]

manifesting a pre super bowl peng-win

[scleracentipede]

I'd love more info about the individual system members! I also think a full list of ND headcanons for your Jon and Eddie would be cool too! Again, no pressure and thanks so much!!

tysm for clarifying! imma post some art about the different Scarecrow system members today so I’ll list some ND headcanons for ya now ☺️

Putting under a read more cos this got long!

Scarecrow

Scarecrow, as you know, I headcanon as having DID and by extension CPTSD because lets be real their childhood was horrid

He struggles alot with dissocaitive amensia and would probably say that is the part of his mental health he finds the most 'disabling'

He's spent a lot of his life dissociating from any strong emotion be that positive or negative and can barely remember happy moments let alone sad one (e.g., he can't remember getting his doctorate etc.) followed closely by their frequent flashbacks which manifest as bodily feeling flashbacks rather then actual memories.

Thier autistic and very unashamed of it.

Suprisingly were diagnosed in childhood despite the general neglect they faced but this was not a positive thing for them (see their Granny tried to 'fix it')

He never really therefore had like an autism discovery like some later diagnosed people and his response to being autistic was just kind of "Okay then."

He is not very 'good' with social stuff and gets overstimmed extremely easily leading to alot of angry outbursts that others precieve as 'temper tantrums' but he's geniunely in agony from the sensory inputs around him and the response is actually porpotional to what he's experiencing. (Wild right? Autistic people's 'irrational' responses might actually be rational to their experiences /sarcasm)

They are all stimming all the time because otherwise they'll scream but the way they stim varies between the alters in their system and isn't always the safest stim (what I mean by this is some of their stims cause them bodily harm but I don't like calling those 'bad' because that's very shaming)

Alot of people around them assume they don't experience empathy and there's definitely times where they have low empathy but they also experience very intense empathy to people their close to, to animals, and objects they just can't communicate this externally

Thier empathy for objects is very strong and why they fix so many items they find (that art piece 'Can't Help Myself' by Sun Yuang and Peng Yu left them catatonic with an intense grief and empathy for like a week)

He gets very focused on things and overall struggles to take care of himself any meaningful way without support. Like he will forget to eat or clean himself till he gets very stick from it without prompting and support

He likely needs a carer to help but doesn't have one and has to rely on his few friends when their free to keep him alive which does not help with his feelings of guilt and he'll often push people away so their not 'burdened' by him and so they don't feel bad for leaving him to rot.

In reality, his friends do not find it a burden at all and actually enjoy his company when he lets them.

He helps them all much more then he realises but he's stubborn like an ox and won't here it (e.g., helping him gives Jervis a schedule and routine that helps him remember more grounded and Jons company makes him very happy)

He has alot of support needs that often go unmet but he is loved and not a failure for that

Not ND but disability related is they definitely have physical health issues too

Specifically Ehlers-Dahlos Syndrome (like me!) and Marfan Syndrome

They have alot of joint pain, dizziness, nausea, and fatigue that contributes them get overstimmed quicker

They self medicate for this alot becuase they cannot afford how expensive healthcare is in Gotham so are usually a little stoned but that does help get less overstimmed so win-win

He's great to have as a friend to because he always baby apsrin (incase his heart plays up), nausea meds, and weed on him.

Edward

Edward has been misdiagnosed and rediagnosed so many times at this point hes skeptical about what actually applies to him so tends to just say hes neurodivergent if asked

As a child he was just labelled as 'petulant know it all' and got told he 'could be great if he'd just apply himself' in school

He's been diagnosed with the following over the years: basically every cluster b personality disorder depending on the doctor, autism, ADHD, autism and adhd, dyspraxia, brief psychotic disorder, OCD etc.

He personally finds AuDHD and OCD to be the most accurate and isn't sure what name you can give to his mood swings but he is relucantly willing to acknowledge that his emotional response seems inappropriate to situations

His complusions can be very dangerous and have lead to him being quite injured though with age he's got better at redirecting himself to do less harm to himself or reducing how much he needs to do something

He's found additional coping strategies like wearing gloves all the time to reduce his contamination fears that have been super helpful too

He's very fidgety and struggles to sit still and is often heard mumbling and talking to himself as a form of stimming (which one of Scarecrow's system finds very soothing actually like a particularly clever hyperlexic white noise machine)

His coordination isn't the best which frustrates him when he's trying to build his puzzles and leads to him relucantly, so very relucantly, asking for assistance from Echo and Query or in what he sees as the worse case scenario Jervis Tetch if its something more technical

He has hypergraphia and is always drawing and writing on things often feeling like his brain is too full and he needs to get it out

He struggles with some auditory halluncinations and occasional visual ones if he's spiralling (not going to share what because it can be triggering to people with hallucinations to read about)

He struggles alot with body image issues constantly trying to look 'perfect' so he seems more in controll then he feels as he's is terrfied of people realising how much of a fraud his confident exterior is

His weight flucuatates alot with the different medication he takes for his mental health and with his hrt which causes him some distress

Basically any change he cannot control upsets him

More physical disability headcanons: He actually needs his cane as he struggles with fibromyalgia and POTS so needs it to help relieve leg pain and for balance

He does water aerobics as a gentle excercise that helps with his pain (he thinks Scarecrow would benefit from it but he refuses to go with him - it would be so nice on his joints!)

Edward actually experiences alot more low empathy then Scarecrow and had to teach himself sympathy because he did not understand others at all when they were upset or happy

He's quite touch avoidant and isn't sure why (probably trauma Edward) because he often feels like he is so desparate to be hugged that he has been hollowed out with a melon bawler

In addition he often feels very nervous around other men especailly when they get aloud or drunk (once again trauma) so often ends up with closer friendships with the women in his life like Echo Query or the Gotham Sirens who often joke that he is their diversity man hire.

I hope you enjoyed my ramblings!

[safesthavenoutsideofexistence]

Behind the scenes is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My life is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My within is rigged to go in the desired intention only. The way I think is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My deep rooted beliefs is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My self trust and confidence is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My self concept is rigged to go in the desired intention only. Frequencies and vibrations are rigged to go in the desired intention only. My actions and the words I say are rigged to go in the desired intention only. How they perceive me and experience me is rigged to go in the desired intention only. What they think of me and how they feel about me is rigged to go in the desired intention only. What they say about me is rigged to go in my desired intention only. My energetic and psychic control is rigged to go in the desired intention only. How I view the world is rigged in my desired intention only. How I perceive things is rigged to go in the desired intention only. The things I say is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My authenticity is rigged to go in the desired intention only. I GOT THAT CERTAIN ENERGY THAT HITS🔥. My energy tangibly oozes dream body. I shine brightly like a sunflower. I radiate beauty everytime I wake up and I only get more and more infinitely objectively beautiful and peng. I have this astonishingly undeniable intelligence. They admire how I'm wild yet a deep thinker (chills). I'm tangibly the flex. I'm rigged to choose those who meet my standards. I'm tangibly worth it. I'm the apex predator of being worth it. I'm tangibly the highlight of their day. I'm the tangibly the highlight of their entire year. With me, they want to play the hero knowing dang well I'm the hero of my own story. They cry and break stuff when I block them. They cry and break stuff when I don't talk to them. They cry and break stuff when I don't pay attention to them. My deep rooted beliefs are rigged to go in the desired intention only. My gravitational pull is rigged to go in the desired intention only. My memories are rigged to go in the desired intention only. My within goes in the desired intention only. Energy go in the desired intention only. My subconscious mind is rigged to go in the desired intention only. They can't even find dupes I don't even have any dupes. Trusting go in the desired intention only. My within is rigged to guide me to show me just how much is in my favor. They're rigged to not deter my growth. I'm rigged to be valued as priceless. I'm rigged to be astonishingly amazed. I'm rigged to only receive good news I'm rigged to celebrate. I'm rigged to attract dream women who are astonishingly amazing in bed. I'm rigged to have instant gratification. All things are rigged to have solely and exclusively positive meanings for me. No one is like me. No one can be me. No one can ever be like me. No one holds my authenticity. I'm the embodiment of why black women is elite and superior. Number 9 is rigged to be in my favor. Number 4 is rigged to be in my favor. Their birthdays are rigged in my favor. Their names are rigged in my favor. L is rigged in my favor. The dark is rigged in my favor. I'm rigged to know how the quantum physics of it all works. I'm rigged to know how the quantum physics of my desire work. I'm rigged to multiverse traverse. I'm rigged to be skilled at time travel. The letter A is rigged in my favor. They're rigged to never find anybody else like me ever, deepening the dire profundity of my absence in their lives. When I affirm or manifest the behind the scenes inherently instantly get to work. My mindset is rigged to go in the right direction only. They're rigged to know they need me just to succeed. Miracles is rigged to get to work. The zillionaire superstar is rigged to unfold in my reality. There's no point of stressing over it cause it's still rigged in my favor anyway. Absolutely everyone and everything is.

[zuzukunis]

alatus nemeseos — a brief dive into xiao's character

he longs for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers.

to understand his character better i’d firstly like to briefly talk about the connection between his backstory and the archetypal stories the writers used to create him: "guardian yaksha" and "numinous official's redemption" both (of which) involve a malevolent spirit on a path towards goodness.

among the twelve heavenly generals (a well-known group of guardian yakshas in some buddhist denominations) one is associated with a bird deity, the golden-winged garuda. this fearsome bird deity, however, only ate evil dragons, until one day the poison he consumed while doing so became unbearable and he burnt to death, leaving only a crystal heart behind. the tattoo on xiao’s arm is that of an illuminated beast, related to his true form, the form of a vermilion bird. alatus nemeseos, or the golden winged great peng, xiao’s constellation is a reference to the bird deity. and from xiao’s character story we know that his story is very similar to that of said deity. “xiao relentlessly slaughtered the endless, impure manifestations of their vengeful souls, but in doing so, he caused them to fracture. eventually, these fragments of their hatred were able to taint xiao’s own soul.” and still xiao dons his mask to take on the role of a protector, slaughtering all evil, day after day despite it brining him great anguish. this endless war he wages has not only placed a karmic burden on him but also caused him to resign himself “to the fact that fighting is all he is good at.”

‹ the demon-hunting yaksha ›

“in the fables of another land, the name xiao is that of a spirit who encountered great suffering and hardship. he endured much suffering, as you have. use this name from now on.” (xiao character story ii) after the archon war ended the geo archon called upon the yakshas to fight against the remnants of the defeated gods. but gods are immortal. and despite knowing they were fighting a battle that could never be won the yakshas continued to do so. xiao has been protecting liyue for over a millennia, tainting his soul and watching as karmic debt slowly but surely ate away at the souls of the other yakshas, until all of them succumbed to madness and only he remained. and he knew that one day his karmic debt would catch up to him too. and once it did he would meet fate similar to that of the golden-winged deity.

‹ the fall of the last yaksha ›

“there was once when most of xiao’s strength was spent fighting from dusk till down, with him emerging victorious by a mere hair. the reeds in the fields had been sliced to ribbons in the fierce fighting. plucking his spear from where it had been planted in the ground, xiao began to trek home. well, once says “home” — yet, where did xiao have to return to? he was merely leaving the battlefield. long exhausted, xiao felt the divine hatred that tainted his body take effect. limitless hate flooded his senses, and he fell to the ground in agony. but it was also at that moment that the pain vanished without warning. this was not by xiao’s own strength, for he had been rescued by the sound of a flute. the clear, lovely sound of the flute came over the mountains and rivers, carried on the wind to where he lay. and clear it continued to ring till the first light of dawn brought with it the startled flight of distant birds. it protected xiao, massaging his wild senses, and giving him a moment’s peace. who was playing this music? xiao was curious but did not pursue the matter. for he already had something approaching an answer. the last person who could help him was one of the seven themselves. so this person, too, must be—.” (xiao, characters story v)

xiao, like the golden-winged bird, was about to succumb to his karmic debt. after a millennia of slaying evil spirits it had finally caught up to him, flooding his senses and bringing him down to the ground in great agony. but unlike the bird deity, he had someone to save him. if it weren’t for the lovely sound soothing his senses, that venti let the wind carry to where xiao lay throughout the whole night, xiao would have ended up just like the bird deity. but unlike the fallen yaksha, he managed to survive and keep his crystal heart hidden. and only those who manage to get close to him get to see glimpses of his gentleness.

‹ the yaksha with the crystal heart ›

“according to xiao’s profile, his deepest, most hidden element is gentleness. when all identities and labels are cast aside, xiao has a gentle side, shown in his curiosity towards phenomena in the human world, but he is very reticent to show this side of himself to others.” deep down xiao is a caged bird burdened with a gentle soul and is full of curiosity. he is curious about humans but he doesn’t wish to cause them any harm and so he stays away. after living for so long in the distance, the world has become nothing but a warm light that he is too scared to reach out to (like in his idle animation: "xiao stretches out his hand to try to make contact with it, but because of his karma-ravaged constitution, he succeeds only in causing the spirit to fly away. he knew this would be the inevitable conclusion, but feels dejected all the same."). “this lonely state of existence is the source of his melancholy. it has cause time to stand still, leading to him still having a very young mentality even to this day.” where xiao seems cold and distant he is actually inexperienced, which leaves him unsure of how to act. he doesn’t know what his place among humans is. this results in him coming off as silent and cold-hearted, while in fact underneath all that is a crystal heart, that dreams of nothing but dancing in a sea of flowers to the sound of venti’s flute.

‹ “heroes… i like that word” ›

"it's rare for a yaksha to find repose for their soul." during the 2.7 archon quest xiao is finally learning he isn’t only a demon-hunting yaksha. that he isn’t only a burdened to others. he is learning that there are people who care about him and who want to be a part of his life no matter how hard he tries to push them away for their own good. yes, he did sacrifice himself to save everyone (thank you zhongli for saving our beloved little yaksha) but only because it was the most optimistic solution he could think of. but when the traveler, into whom xiao places a great amount of trust, expreses their concern and confronts him about it, xiao says: i accept your advice. from this day on, heroes will always look out for each other. this is such an important moment for his character because he is finally setting himself free. he is no longer that caged bird.

i just wanted to hop on here and push my “xiao actually has the most gentle soul in all of genshin” agenda. *most of the information here can be found either in game (xiao’s character stories) or in the developer insight #4. also i wanted to add that there isn’t really much about the “numinous official’s redemption” in the official document but (from what i could find) it’s basically a story about a heavenly general who was given the opportunity to correct his wrong doings by the emperor. which you could connect to zhongli freeing xiao from the god that enslaved him, thus giving him the opportunity to redeem himself.

[austerlitzborodinoleipzig]

Conti/Macii third and at their top again.... I probably jinxed Peng Cheng by manifesting a good result.

[sabrinaboglund]

Sådan Undgår Du at Jinxe Din Manifestation

Uanset hvor meget du ved eller ikke ved om Manifestation, så vil der opstå tidspunkter, hvor det føles at din Manifestation er blevet Jinxet! Når det kommer til Jinx, så er vi lidt ude i samme boldgade, som når vi mener noget er blevet forhekset eller forbandet. Det gode er, at forhekselser, forbandelser og Jinxer egentlig kun virker, så længe vi tror på at det virker. Hvis du kan bryde fri fra…

[purble-turble]

In the MK interfering, I could see wukong trying to be with azure because it's the "healthy" option he misses macaque so much and macaque in his heartbreak letting peng's jabs bring his confidence down back to pre jttw levels he doesn't want to be alone anymore, surely this is better than nothing. Both of them are absolutely miserable but hide it well

LMK season 4 spoilers...

.

.

I feel like MK is just the type of person to get drawn into "fairy tale logic" if that makes sense. His first experience with Macaque and Wukong meeting is when they have a huge, earth-shattering fight, so he's probably having a hard time seeing them together as a good thing (even if Macaque is not as much as a bad guy as he was back then)

So yeah, MK could easily be deceived into seeing Azure as a better option for Sun Wukong. Plus, shoving Macaque at this new bird uncle will keep him out of trouble and from getting too jealous of the Monkey King's cool new boyfriend. So MK thinks it works out for everyone!!

...but yes. It's not actually so great. Both Sun Wukong and Macaque are miserable without each other. Wukong is glad to see Azure Lion and all, and it's good to see he's a better person now too (as far as he knows) ... he does have fond feelings for the lion, but it's not the same.

Macaque is suuuper put down by his breakup with Wukong. He tends to favor anger as a way to express himself, so his grief and loneliness just manifest that way, and he ends up in shouting matches with Peng all the time (Peng always wins by reminding him that he doesn't deserve any better than this)

Anyway, the two monkeys don't see each other for awhile because of Azure and Peng's (and MK's) machinations.... but as fun as it is to leave them dramatically miserable, it's even more fun to add some cheesy romance tropes in there. You ever see that ending scene in Pride and Prejudice where it's a really foggy morning and the two meet up by chance out on a stroll because they're both just dying of longing to be with the other person who they think they've already ruined their chances with? ...Yeah. Like that. 🥰 but with more making out haha

[fluffypotatey]

do u have any fun thoughts on mei that u would perhaps want to share with the class

oh no! a prompted ask about my blorbo that i am unable to refuse!

short answer: chaos gremlin

long answer:

i love, love, LOVE how chaotic and energetic she is. before Wukong, she was the only one who could match MK’s energy, and honestly, the two of them combined could power up Megapolis for a whole year. watched Hero is Born and fell in love

see this?

it was this moment. that dam smile 🥰 pulled me in (she like me fr fr except she actually has the resources to follow through with violently protecting her bestie bc she’s rich)

she is a horrible enabler and i’m sure gave Pigsy quite the headache when they first met since she probably got MK into so many shenanigans and hijinks. they are horribly mischievous together and have their morals thrown out the window because chaos is much more fun (you could even say she might be an enabler for the harbinger of chaos who exacts judgement on the hubristic gods of old and—) also, if she spent more time with Ao Lie in that memory scroll, she would have been a horrible influence.

Ao Lie: sure, he was rude but it’s not worth it Mei: bite his dick off

i do like to imagine how much her power has probably changed since the Samadhi Fire was unlocked. she was already powerful before using her dragon speed to help with her racing and her dragon spirit manifestation can wack a bitch (macackle) good. so, now infused with the world/universe ending fire (is it an infusion???? did they explain it and i forget???? imma just roll with it) Mei’s range for fire breathing is a lot farther (could her dragon breathe fire before? or was it just a beam???) and her constitution is probably a lot higher given that she needs it to not burn to death.

also, madam is protective to a fault. girlie has integrity and honor to a T. if mackerel didn’t stop her, Mei would 100% have beaten Peng to a pulp. Birdie would have been roasted alive (literally this time instead of verbally)

but yeah she’s cool.

[diahmandis]

February

The month went by so fast. Quick announcement: I no longer post on my Instagram everyday. From @pritongsiomai, I am now @beefysaucylinamnamulam. I got so caught up with classes that I don’t get the chance to post anymore. Well, I do post the randomest shit on my stories everyday, there’s that. At least I can trace what I’ve been up to there.

In terms of the book I am reading this month, I’m still stuck with Big Magic. I do admit that I’ve lost so much time to read because of the constant battle of commuting to class every now and then, and I really don’t want to bring any additional weight anymore because my back PUNISHES me for it.

On a deeper and personal level, the month has been so challenging. As I’ve said before, I want to become the best version of myself this year. Though I think it is possible, there are so many setbacks that make me anxious every now and then. I’ve been constantly thinking about my future, about how I can save up for a lot of things (namely: a laptop, our Singapore trip in November, birthday gifts, Toffee’s needs, and just saving up for myself in general). I don’t know where I can get money. I can do commissions but I really don’t have the time to make all those announcement pubs and shit. I can get another paid internship, but I know I’ll find it hard to balance with my academic load. I can bake, but the commute from Bulacan to QC is just so draining, I don’t know if I’ll still have the energy to do so. Tangina penge nalang pera!!!!! Joke lang, manifesting commissions soon nalang 😭

Overall, I give this month a 5/10. So much has been happening to my life I can’t even keep track. I hope March would be better. I hope things would get easier.

[maskingtape]

SCREEN | 介面: Or Else It's Not Utopian – by David Borgonjon

DB: Is taxidermy alive?

SY: There's no way for me to say what it is.

Sun Yuan and Peng Yu. The World is a Fine Place For You to Fight For. 2011, single-channel video. Courtesy of the Artist.

DB: So you can't say for sure whether a specimen's alive or not. There's always that inkling of doubt about a specimen. Maybe it's sleeping. In your video work, The world is a fine place, and worth fighting for, a red velvet curtain draws apart periodically, sometimes revealing an important-looking man encircled by bodyguards and taxidermy lions, and other times revealing a stainless steel showroom kitchen. Is there a soul in the cabinets and closets? Better yet, can projecting produce knowledge?

SY: I don't know what it can produce. But fundamentally, projection is a realization of the will. Take qigen (decorative and collectible roots that grow into unusual, often anthropomorphic, shapes), for example. It's somewhere between a human and a thing. So it manifests something more inside of the thing, and isn't just the thing by itself. Or for example, patina. When you get down to it, what is it? Can you explain it from science or pure materiality? (Laughs.) Chinese have countless categories for patinas, and each type requires a period of aging and often of physical contact. Patina can't be forged.

[christine-dela-cruz]

3.27.24

Wednesday.

This week, kani lang akuang klase and I have to go to school early pa kay nag absent mi last week. Lowkey manifesting na di masuko si sir Carlito. SOOO, my day started when I was waiting for an e-jeep paadto placida kay nangluod si pengwin kay la ko nag adto yesterday to asikaso na iuli ang parcel, so while waiting naa'y nanawag pa Uhaw daw tas late na nako na realize papa diay niya nanawag sa ako. Nag talk mi slight (awkward pero hehe) 3 mi pasahero niya and ako ang last na gihatod (gihatod sa atbang sa ila balay). Then kato as time passed by, pauli na dapat ko---magpahatod sa kanto nila para makasakay ko ug e-jeep paadto KCC pero naabot iyang papa and told me na isabay ko sa ila kay paadto sila Tacurong pero muagi palengke. We thought ni peng na from palengke rako ibaba pero guess what? Mali mi. hahahaha gi baba ko nila sa tapat mismo sa KCC Terminal bsan kiat ang doggo nila sa likod. So, that's it. Nag melt akuang heart from what happen di nako ma put into words akuang feelings ron hays, unta safe sila makaabot sa Tacurong hehe xoxo

[safesthavenoutsideofexistence]

They're rigged to be unable to mimic my power. My affirmations and manifestations are rigged to go in the desired intention only. Everytime I see them in my imagination or mind they're rigged to give me precisely what I want in inexhaustible amounts. I'm rigged to have deep-rooted beliefs that my intrusive, undesirable and unfavorable thoughts never come true. I'm very grateful all things I don't want are rigged to not exist. They know it's futile to try to turn it into their favor. I'm rigged to steal their thunder and they're rigged to thank me for it. It's fact I'm a gorgeous girl that stands out from the flock. It's a fact I'm a gorgeous girl that stands out from billions of people. I'm the apex predator of being incomparable. It's a fact I got that incomparable glow unable to be found in anybody else. It's an objective fact no one else is ever like me. It's an objective fact I'm unbelievably perfect inside and out. It's an objective fact I live a fortunate life. It's an objective fact I live the luckiest life. It's an objective fact I live the most magical life. Everything I say about myself is actually true that's why I'm dangerous ;). It's an objective fact I'm an attention magnet. It's an objective fact I'm a money magnet. It's an objective fact I'm absolutely everybody's type. I'm the first person they want and crave to be around (chills). It's an objective fact I'm the apex predator of being peng. It's an objective fact I'm just too unbelievably attractive, inside and out. I'm objectively special. They see me everywhere. They're objectively in love with me. Im objectively brilliant. Im objectively the apex predator of being radiant. Im objectively put on the pedestal by absolutely everybody. It's an objective fact I only radiate and ooze staggeringly unrivaled mellifluously supreme validated energy. The past is objectively revised into my favor on absolutely all and each energy level, covering absolutely all the devils. Even the year of their birth is utterly rigged into my favor. In rigged to have already tapped into my true power (chills). My awareness is the apex predator of awareness. I'm the apex predator of having all eyes on me. I'm the apex predator of being their love fantasy. My spiritual strength is the apex predator of spiritual strength. The deeper recesses of my brain, subconscious and consciousness is rigged Laika to me in the flesh and in the way I fully expect. I'm rigged to attract women lovers who are a year older than me, beliefs aligning with mine, can cook, have green eyes, magical and are just my dream women in general. My powers are rigged to never stop amplifying. My truth is cool (chills). Me expressing my truth is cool. Me living in my truth is cool. I'm real cool just by being myself. Just by being myself is a cool ass compelling melody. My relevancy is the apex predator of relevancy. My relevancy is on Godmode. Nothing changes the fact I still got people compellingly interested in me and violently engrossed with me. Nothing changes the fact everyone still compellingly pays attention to me the most. Nothing changes the fact I'm still doing supremely good🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. Nothing changes the fact extremely potent and powerful ass blessings still come my way left and right. The devil is rigged to never come my way. Everything is rigged to never make me question myself. Everything is rigged to show me I'm doing absolutely everything right fr. It's okay for me to share what I know. I'm rigged to have all the tools to succeed. I'm rigged to have all the tools to get my desires so unbelievably and astonishingly fast. It's all rigged to work out for me from beginning, middle and end. My habits are rigged to change to align with the Zillionaire Superstar version of me. I'm rigged to be enabled to do everything right. I'm rigged to experience astonishing magic. I'm rigged to be the apex predator of being blessed beyond unfathomable, unprecedented, astonishing, breathtaking, unthinkable and awe-inspiring measure. The best route for me is rigged to be the easiest one.

[pure-land-mind-life]

阿弥陀佛. Universe started together when your xin (mind) is shakened. Yi than zhin too many 32,000. Xing fu yuan man. It is created even before any time and space. Alaya consciousness is created. How big? Bigger than the universe, it is zhe xin. Lun wui is to tai yim and change it. Meng sarm kin seng (sarm leng) where u have chap seng (dirty, tham chan chi, ko sarng wud too use to it this turned into wisdom, chi seng sickness). Sarng meng is sarng wud. Zhuan seng to become zhi wai. Fui fuk zhi seng, seng fat (cheng fo). Close to Enlightenment which with no differentiation. Mona become pin deng. Xin fo peng deng. That is the state of Buddhahood. Time & space came from one source. Me but still got fa sheng. Western Pureland is created by it too of Amitabha Buddha but it does not have 'zhi xin dong nian'. Non differentiation mind. The truth behind the tooth. The papaya croach story. When you let go of yourself, you got the world. When you let go of this world, you will get Western Pureland. Tree is life. Today is world environmental day, Jun 5th 2022. A tree is a universe. Money is printed from destroying a universe (tree) and then used in ways to cause more harm to the planet, the universe. Change it dont chase for it, seek and manage. Everything you do, everyone you see, dharma help you see the truth all attachments become saha world, then suffering arise, everything is Amituofo, the way you see the world becomes Amituofo. Ching jing peng deng sure reborn in Pureland. Practicex3. Zhen fa meng ru lai (Kuan yin aeons ago. Kuan ser yin ru lai teaches Kuan Ser Yin pusa the disciple, er kern zhui ling). My true nature is the Buddha. Wui guai zhi sing. Dharma is the cure sickness (Fart). Li ( bu shen bu miet) ser jen, xiang sher jia. Xin is chen, ser is jia. True or false also dont be too attached. Bu ji xing dong nien jiu ser the tips. With a sickness, ji, xing, dong, nien, fern, bie, zhe, zhuo (6 gen). Karn po. Yi cher yau wei fart, sern miet fa. Mei lai mei chu, sam mo se de mei you. Wo you 3 bao. Ching jing peng den. Arhat avhieve zeng jue. Pusa practice Peng deng xin to achieve chen deng zeng jue, Buddha chen wu sarng chen deng jue. Ser jie wan wu ser yi ti. This body is my manifestation. Dont do anything in saha world that makes you attached too much that you couldnt let go and seek rebirth in Western Pureland. Wu xin is Amituofo. Amituofo is my xin. Every ben xin is Amituofo. You seek yourself. Let yourself be found, not search outside but inside. The world is using a piece of paper to weigh everything, cert for qualification, paper owns land and houses. A piece of paper becomes everything, your self worth as light as a piece of paper....Jing zhen guo. Fang xia chai but ku, let go and burden's gone...Compassion is your focus, is your life. If no compassion then only left unhappiness and sorrow. Happiness in Saha world is the start of unhappiness. Go back to the neutral state is happiness, no unhappiness. You need to peace down, silent give rise to wisdom. My heart is my way place. Wo xin ju shi tao chang. Fo got 52 jie ti. Let go, become Arhat, let go become Pusa and let go become Buddha.

Chaotu prayers / retreat: Lunch by 1.30 pm on Pusa 8 kwan zhai day. Note: June 21st in china kills dog, Korea, Vietnam, use zhi lig, fa lig, fo lig. Then, it will combined at a great strength to change the world. 30 days be vegan. House concept, a house is like a cell. No matter how beautiful, you are trapped within. Your body is already like a house. Ur problem is u let go of ur house and came here, that is the dna effect of leaving Chn to Msia living a house there like grandpa.

Part 1

Nian fo - 8x108 x 2 (6 syllable), 16x108 x 6 (4 syllable) Done 28

Kuan yin - 8x108 x 2, 100% Done 28

Ksitigarbha 8x108 x 2, 100% Done 28

Heart sutra, Done 67

Tadyatha om gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha x 108 Done 5.5

Surangama mantra - 4×108, 100% Done 5.5

Stupa mantra, Done 69

A va la ka kia 108, Done 5.75

Compassionate mantra, Done 66

Namo he lai dan na tuo lai ye ye, namo o li ye, po lo je ti se pe la ye, pu ti sa tuo po ye, mo he sa tuo po ye, mo he jia lu ni jia ye, Dan zhe tan.

Om Du lin, Du lin, Jia Du lin, Soha. Done x 5.75

Part 2

Long Medicine Buddha mantra, Medicine Buddha heart mantra 108, Done 3.75

Om mani padme hum, a a sa sa maha - 8x108 Done 18

Usnisa Vijaya mantra, Om Bhrum Soha - 8x108 x 2, Done 18

Om Ah Hum 8x108 x 2, Done 19

Manjushri mantra 4x108, 100% Done 3.5

Om Avira Hum Kachara Mum Soha Done x 3.25

Earth store mantra 4x108, 100% Done 3.5

7th Past Parents mantra 4x108, 100% Done 3.5

Long life mantra 4x108, 100% Done 3.5

Om Maiyura Krante Svaha Done x 3.5

Namo Bo bo Ti li, Cher (li) To li, Dan tuo ye tuo ye, Done 3.25

Om ye ye nan 4x108, Done 7.25

Food mantra 4x108, Done 13.5

Water offering mantra, Done 3.25

Liberate small water being mantra, Done 3.75

Part 3

Sakyamuni Buddha mantra 4x108 Done 3.25

Tara mantras

- Green 4x108, Done 3.25

- White 4x108, Done 3

Om Tare Tuttare Ture Mama Ayuh Punya Jñana (Gyana) Pustim (Pusting) Kuru Svaha

- Red 4x108, 100% Done 3

Setrap mantra 4x108, Done 3.25

Om Benza Wiki Bitana Soha 4x108, Done 2.5

~ Shanti Siddhi Hom 4x108, Done 2.5

Eliminate karma by 7 buddhas mantra 4x108, Done 3

Pudong Ru Lai Zhou

Pureland rebirth mantra 4x108, Done 4.25

Light mantra 4x108, Done 4.25

Om Benza Sato Hung 4×108, Done 33.25

Mantra multiplier mantra 4x108, Done 41.5

Others:

Om tore tore cha tore so poho

Om Lan Soha

Om Chrine

Om Brim

Om Pu Kam (Pureland).

Am Bi Chanaga.

Om da de da de mohe dade svaha.

Om Mani Padme Hung A a sa sa maha

Namo bhagavate...x4

Om Amida Ayu Dadi Soha

Food Mantra

Ganlu sui zhou

Namo bo bo ti li, cher (li) to li, dan tuo ye tuo ye

Om mani facili hum

You need to nian fo then can achieve fo

But now, you only nian 6 realm of rebirth how to achieve fo?

You are fo why cannot become fo?

Becos u never let go of the 6 realm or rebirth activities. Greed, anger, ignorance (3 poisons need to let go 1st)

All ppl are the creation of their minds.

Then can u nian fo (real valuable activities the rests are useless)? All problems are due to cant let go of afflictions. Zhe xin give rise to Amituofo & Western Pureland. All existence is creation of the mind. How to let go of everything and seek rebirth in Pureland. All existence, this Saha world is creation of the mind / messy thoughts. Our body is our own manifestation of the (our) mind. Let go of the thoughts and mind, it will take u to next creation / manifestation. Practice but forget don't put practice into the mind. Be forgetful but only remember where you are going, Western Pureland so keep that in mind. This is called freedom of the mind (like depicted in Heart Sutra, freedom - zezai), our only aim which is zezai warng serng si fang ji le sher chieh. Love is the opposite of wisdom. Wisdom can only arise from compassion if you can turn love to compassion. Love can be a distraction to a cultivator. Love is not real. Reason stuck in 6 realms of retribution is love (because got form and conditions), everything of this nature is impermanent, hence love is not real, jia xiang. U cant come out. Dont let jia siang chi pien ni de xin. Dont be fooled by a false image / appearance. Use peng deng xin to console sentient beings, Buddha treat everyone like his father, the King. The thanxiang, cow agarwood no longer here. Go Western Pureland: (Haitao Fashi) Use 3 fu tien, kan ern de fu tien, zhun jing de fu tien, cher pei de fu tien. (Chin Kung Fashi) 3 fu, xiao shun fu mu / respective teachers - 1. Filial piety is the root. 2. Take refuges, san kwai yi / chi kai. 3. Sam sun yan ko (first, nian fo yin, cheng fo zhi ko). Ying guang fa shi. Wu liang yik zhi zhai fan now, Da zhi zai tien wang tha men di fu de guang ming bu nen kan dao. In front of rulai, it's gone. Fan fu. We have 51 mental factors

https:///wiki/Mental_factors_(Buddhism)

- sing so 11 san de (seong ying), fanuo de 26 (seong ying). The 10 recitation method x 9 times in a day, 2 minutes each time, nian nian bu warng Amituofo. The tipper is must be continuous....then u see improvement (kungfu). Must use chen xing. (Learn from the best learn from the Muslims. Let go to do prayer when the time comes.) Ying ye, 5 jie 10 sarn. Huan xi pu ser. Pu ser, cai yuen guenx2 lai. All existence are manifestation of karma, the fruits of causes (combination of effects). All are swihuan de. At one point, u are here, there, everywhere in the universe of existence, different space and time like a multiverse. This body is like a bowl of water with lots of salt added (a.k.a. sufferings which r the effects of ur past karma). Everything u have contact with is to let u 'suffer' all circumstances created in some past lives that u cant see or remember. The purpose of cultivation is to realised this truth (6 realms of rebirth). To break and escape this cycle is to achieve Buddhahood. Fastest way is to see all existences as one and of the same. If u destroy ur own defilements u are doing the same for others only when u have compassion and use 'peng deng, chi pei, po re xin'. This body is yeap bo. Life is like a bowl of salt water. Living it is like drinking it. You need to add more water not morr salt so it geys better over time. Get out of it, pour it back to the sea. You dont need to drink it. It is where water would return (thru true self discovery and enlightenment, practice of Buddhism to the highest level).

4 Universal Vows

Also sometimes called the Bodhisattva Vows, as they are essential to the Bodhisattva path of Mahāyāna Buddhism.

1. Sentient beings are limitless; I vow to liberate them.

眾生無邊誓願度

Zhòngshēng wúbiān shìyuàn dù

Zhong Shen Wu Bian Ser Yuan Tu

2. Afflictions are endless; I vow to eradicate them.

煩惱無盡誓願斷

Fánnǎo wújìn shìyuàn duàn

Fan Now Wu Jing Ser Yuan Tuan.

3. Teachings are infinite; I vow to learn them.

法門無量誓願學

Fǎmén wúliàng shìyuàn xué

Fa Men Wu Liang Ser Yuan Shue.

4. Buddhahood is supreme; I vow to attain it.

佛道無上誓願成

Fú dào wú shàng shìyuàn chéng

Fo Dao Wu Sharng Ser Yuan Chern.

Say this 4 things, ask to let go:

Ken ching qiu fangxia yuen:

1. Du bu qu. Sorry.

2. Ching yuan liang wo. Please forgive me.

3. Xie xie ni. Thank you.

4. Wo ai ni. I love you.

Duration of cultivation:

41 years. May 3rd, 2022 - May 3rd, 2062 (add one year worth of cultivation)

When the Prince, Siddhartha Gautama bids farewell to his father saying:

Even my love for Yasodhara…and my son…

cannot remove the pain I feel.

For I know that they too will have to suffer,

grow old…and die.

Like you, like me, like us all.

Yes. We must all die…

and be reborn…

and die again,

and be reborn and die,

and be reborn and die again.

No man can ever escape that curse.

Then that…is my task. I…will lift that curse.

At the moment of the attainment of awakening, the Buddha uttered the following:

"I travelled through the rounds of countless births through the cycle of existence,

Seeking but not finding the builder of this house [of 'self'] and again and again, I faced the suffering of new birth.

O Housebuilder, you have now been seen,

You shall not build a house again for me.

Your beams [defilements] have now been broken, Your ridgepole [ignorance] utterly shattered.

My mind has attained the supreme

'nibbana' ('blowing out')

Realised is the unconditioned, Achieved is the end of craving."

- Siddhartha Gautama

(Dhammapada Verses 153 and 154)

When attachment arises in our mind it does not feel harmful; on the contrary it usually feels beneficial. Therefore, it is important to contemplate repeatedly the faults of attachment and to recognize it as a delusion whose only function is to cause us harm.

Remember one cannot trust what you sees because ur eyes are imperfecg and cannot see the absolute truth. This organ limitation is bounded by it creations. It is created from delusion. What is deluded cannot revealed it undeluded nature. Just like the blind leading the blind...it is still within the same state which is called suffering. When u see without seeing and when u have sight of not using any organ is when the truth would be revealed and the absolute truth is the state overcoming delusion or samsara, the true escape of realm of rebirths. Is when u crossed the other shore. The state of relization, Buddhood, the enlightment.