you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.
(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)
but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.
(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)
there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.
(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)
you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.
(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)
you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.
in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.
but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.
they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.
it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.
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it frankly pisses me off that what is essentially “rapists and abusers should be depicted as monstrous caricatures because humanizing them is inappropriate” is considered a very moral and enlightened position to have on art by so many people. a rapist can feel pain, have moments of vulnerability, be amiable and charming, express remorse and compassion at times, be a victim themselves, and so on in real life. they are even capable of doing good things. they can have different sides to them and have individuals in their lives that they are kind to or have a decent relationship with. they will be a human being, and that fact encompasses a lot. conflating that with the claim that they are entitled to and deserve forgiveness or absolution is an issue. nurturing a mindset that believes they need to be one note and uncomplicated to be a correct and tasteful depiction of a rapist inadvertently falls in line with the logic of “how could they have possibly raped you? they are so normal and kind to me. they did all these good things here and there.” ok that doesn’t change that they are a rapist.
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one thing i havent seen anyone talk about yet in dungeon meshi is how sometimes the party just fucking. forgets important info. and usually it bites them in the ass but it feels so natural and human. like yeah my ass would probably forget what namari said about senshi's pot too. and then whatever plans the party makes are always built on half-remembered info, autism sauce, luck, and a solid chunk of actual dungeoneering expertise at its core
it's actually what really makes me wonder sometimes if dunmeshi was based on an actual dnd campaign, because the goofy fuck ups just SCREAM "pack of dipshits playing dnd together and NO ONE is taking down notes"
and then ryoko ties it all together into a unique sequence of events that never perfectly resembles A) whatever the reader thinks they might do or B) whatever the party had planned in the first place and turns it and its just augh. its so good!! i wanna see what these freaks think of next!!! what fucked up shit are you guys gonna do to get out of this one!!
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I know we get collectively frustrated when staff roll out an unwanted layout change (I do too) but jfc the way some of you speak in your @/staff posts is absolutely vile. You know a human being has to read that right. You know a person with a job and rent to pay has to read you telling them to kill themselves because you don't like a website change their management ordered. You know that right
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I find it completely hilarious to think after Simon was freed from the crown and got to be himself in Ooo that he and Finn have a close relationship that neither of them understand.
Finn views Simon as a fellow human, someone he saw at their lowest point and now is on the upswing and now they can be buddies and go on adventures together. He also wants to do sleepovers all the time, what a bro. Simon sure is fussy with him, like Jake sometimes is, must be because they're such good friends.
Simon meanwhile is going around to people in Ooo like 'why did you let a child/teenager live alone in a treehouse with a dog and access to weaponry while making him fight monsters?' and when no one stepped up, Simon unofficially claimed Finn as his own. He checks in regularly, goes over a brings groceries, cleans up the treehouse, educates Finn as best he can on human anatomy, culture, history as well as other stuff.
Its so obvious to everyone - especially Marcy who is laughing her ass off in the background - that the former Ice King is trying to parent Finn who doesn't get it and proceeds to friendzone the hell out of his father figure.
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Mihawk finally gives in and agrees to sail with Shanks and half his first day aboard the red force is spent learning that no actually, ships don’t just sail on vibes .
And the second half is spent deciding that Mihawk shouldn’t be allowed to map out routes because while their sure they’d somehow magically get there nobody actually knows what the fuck island 30 degrees left of the rock where seagull 368 lands at 2pm every Wednesday and Saturday to fluff its feathers means.
Building Snake is following him around observing then hastily scratching down notes in a notepad. Shanks has once again denied his request to study Mihawk under a microscope
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What absolutely boggles my mind is that people who celebrated the murder of civilians, celebrated the rape of women and girls, celebrated the butchering of babies, celebrated kidnapping, are lecturing us on human rights, calling us racist, calling us fascists and calling us murderers and nazis
You can't make this shit up
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BABBLE THE SPELL THAT GETS IT DONE, BABBLE IT ON COMMAND
[image description in read more]
[Image Description: a digital drawing of three white silhouettes gathered around a black book. A multi-colored glow forms the shape of a star underneath them. At each of the five points of the star, the colorful figure of a Lord in Black stands. Pokey is in blue at the bottom left, Nibbly is in pink at the top left, Blinky in purple at the top right, Tinky in yellow at the bottom right, and Wiggly stands at the top point of the star. They loom over the white silhouettes. End Description.]
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