#pinned post now bc i think it’s funny

[properbastard]

I can't mansplain, manipulate, manwhore my way out of this one, lads,

so murder it is

[bravevolunteer]

lied about being productive for a second, tma au michael

[fcxchild-blog]

peeks in

[gibbearish]

theres a kickstarter i backed back in march 2021 thats been going through issue after issue during the production process but has been keeping backers updated the whole time and a couple months ago they announced they were finally able to start shipping orders im excited

[miwakags]

low effort blogs >

[attractedtopeoples]

Jake Webber NSFW Headcanons

NSFW Alphabet

Tags/Warnings: mdni, smutty/suggestive stuff below the cut, don’t like don’t read, written with afab!reader in mind

Johnnie’s version here, Tara’s version here

A/N: hiya, im going insane should I do a Tara version???

Aftercare (what’re they like afterwards)

King of post-sex sleepy cuddles but will definitely make sure your cleaned up and comfortable before he falls asleep, his head is most definitely on your chest as he sleeps too btw.

Body part (favourite of their partners, favourite of their own)

With a afab Partner, their tits. I’m really not going to explain this one too much bc I think it’s obvious (my guy mentions them every second video) but yh.

And it’s a touch odd but he loves his lower stomach, mainly bc you always trace the stars and now he mainly relates that tattoo with those memories of you.

Cum (all things to do w/ cum)

Opposite of Johnnie, loves to make a mess on you. Your stomach, back, tit’s, face- doesn’t matter, he loves it all. He does love being able to ‘clean up’ your tits though (he gets to leave hickeys and lovebites on his favourite part of you, he loves that shit)

Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)

Absolutely a sucker for your nails scratching the back of his neck, or down his back. A bit of a masochist in the sense that he likes small twinges of pain. small enough to not hurt badly- but enough to remind him of you whenever he traces them.

Experience (are they experienced? do they know what they’re doing? etc.)

I’d say average amount of experience, but doesn’t ever brag (other than silly jokes abt getting more bitches than Johnnie), however he has assets, and he knows how to use them, and he uses them well.

Favourite Position (Self-explanatory)

Definitely a sucker for you riding him (cowgirl), and loves to watch your tits bounce along with you.

After a bit he’ll lose patience and help you out a touch, pulling you down onto his chest or swapping positions so your legs are around his waist as he’s pinning you down.

Goofy (are they more serious or silly during the moment?)

Again I feel like a mix between both, but more of a lean into silly, and he loves to tease at the same time.

Hair (are they groomed, do they care if you’re groomed, does the carpet match the drapes, etc)

Doesn’t care if your shaved and doesn’t bother shaving unless you specifically ask him too, he simply doesn’t see the point in shaving- it’s just hair.

again, it’s a touch darker than his natural hair, but o her than that it does match.

Intimacy (are they romantic in the moment?)

He’s definitely the type to mutter love confessions into your neck- either as you cuddle or fuck- it doesn’t matter, he loves being so close to you and being able to be honest with you about his feelings- plus the ability to give you a few hickeys as he does is a bonus.

Jack Off (Masturbation headcanons)

Horny bastard, but he’s usually confident/comfortable enough to tell you so it’s rare that he jacks off, but it’s not entirely uncommon

maybe once/twice a week as a most/average

Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Face Sitting- loves to have you on his face, it’s quite simple. (He also loves your thighs, so win-win)

Praise- he likes to give and receive this one, but you’ll find it more common to receive this one after a good day, and giving it to him after a bad one

Bondage- rarely but he likes to have his hands tied together behind his back- not being allowed to touch you as a form of punishment- a truly cruel one bc he’s naturally a very touchy person, especially so in these moments.

Switch- he leans more towards dominance but is fine with subbing every now and then.

Location (preference in terms of place)

Does not care. At all. (That’s a lie, there are obviously some no-no’s but you get the point). He does prefer places where you can both be comfortable (mainly you)

Motivation (what turns them on)

You.

He’s such a simp it’s not funny (it is), and he’s so sensitive to touch as well, a truly incredible combo- especially if you feel like being a bit of a tease.

No (turn offs/hard no’s, what they won’t do)

Similar to Johnnie, nothing that he fees could seriously injure you, and definitely nothing where you’d be even slightly uncomfortable. He might try but he doesn’t really understand why. (No matter how much he jokes about Johnnie spanking him)

Oral (preference in giving/receiving, skill, etc)

A bit if both honestly, great at giving, and extremely careful not to hurt you when receiving. A very ‘in-the-middle’ guy when it comes to giving and receiving head.

Pace (what pace do they go at during sex)

He tends to do slightly above average speed, but always deeper- and sweet Jesus is he good at knowing what you want. Whether it be wanting more or less he is very observant and is usually able to adjust rather quickly to what you need/ask for.

Quickie (opinions on quickies)

Dislikes them, only because he likes the patience he can have as he kisses you and your body, borderline body worship every time because ‘that’s what you deserve’ (his words)

Again, wouldn’t say no but would simply prefer to wait until you guys could be alone and take your time with each other.

Risk (are they down to experiment? Do they take risks in their sex life?)

I think he is willing to try anything you ask, but otherwise would default to what he knows. And in terms of doing something in public, well he wouldn’t say no.

Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

This guy has some stamina, I’d say 3-4 rounds before he starts to tire out, but similar to Johnnie he’s very willing to give head if your not done.

Toys (do they own them? do they use them?)

I think he owns them, but hasn’t really used them on himself. If his partner wanted to use them on him- go for it, but he’s never found the need to use them himself. He is also fine with using them on his partner.

Unfair (do they like to tease?)

Definitely. This man might not be exceedingly patient, but in terms of this, he could tease/edge for hours before giving in to what you’re asking.

Volume (how loud are they? What sounds do they make, etc)

I feel like he isn’t overly loud, but not overly quiet either. It entirely depends on the situation and what’s going on. Definitely a groaner but I’m not really gonna describe sounds more than that.

Wild Card (random headcanon)

I loves when you trace his tattoo’s, both in the moment and outside of it, he loves watching your face as you focus on tracing each one.

X-Ray (what’s going on under the clothes)

7 inches, slightly leans to the right, no more explaining.

#E7D8C0 > #F2CFBE

Yearning (how high/low is their sex drive?)

Above Average, about 4+ a week, but if yours is higher or lower he adapts to it easily.

Zzz (how quick they fall asleep after)

He makes sure that your comfortable and all aftercare has been sorted out, but then the second he closes his eyes he’s out like a light.

[onlyseokmins]

show and tell • l.s.m.

Pairing: lee seokmin x afab!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), best friends/idiots to lovers!au Warnings: swearing, lotssss of teasing/switch dynamics, tickling, reader is obsessed w/ seokmin's body, they're idiots your honor and they're a lil bit in L-word 🤮, mingyu thrown under the bus as always, ONE BAD PUN BC I THINK I'M FUNNY, sex is as silly as me, BIG COCK SEOK 🗣️ like he's fucking huge okay, oral (both rec. kind of), attempt at 69 but seok's a menace the entire time, fingering, CRYING/TEARS, possession, biting, marking, multiple orgasms, squirting, lil bit of cumplay ig?, mentions of prev partners, overstim... i think that's it lmk if i missed smth 🥵😰 WC: 6.5k A/N: um so this is the most self-indulgent thing i dared to post you're WELCOME i shall now go die in a hole to never be seen ever again... happy belated birthday to the loml ugh ty to all the frens that let me sob in their dms and to @onlymingyus for helping me with a damn title 💖

The commonly shared belief among your friend group was that Seokmin is abnormally soft when it comes to you.

You thought they were full of shit. 

The bestest buddy in the world was also the softest ray of morning sunshine to ever exist in general. You could barely count on one hand the number of people he genuinely ever showed disdain towards or didn't get along with. All in all — it was extremely hilarious in your opinion because Seokmin's fluffy personality greatly contrasted with his lean, sharp physique. 

Ironically, the main reason you ended up in this position.

Just moments before, you were on his bed and caged between his arms. The dog tag necklace you'd gifted, engraved with his birth date and initials, swinging in the same rhythm that your heart rapidly beats with the small space separating your bodies. A sly grin raises the corners of his lips, the long fingers of his left-hand creeping up to trail lightly at your sides.

"I know you have abs."

Seokmin's hands fly up to wrap defensively around his body, though all in good jest. "You can't just ask a dude how many abs he has!"

"And you can't lie to me by saying you don't have any! Do you know how many of your dude-bros have blabbed about your crazy gym routine to me? Can you even guess how many girls bitched at me 'cause you weren't shirtless at my pool party? As if that's my fault?"

"But it's mine?"

"No, all I have to do is prove them wrong. So, show me the goods!"

You sucked at making up your mind — what to eat, what to wear, what to watch, what to do — okay, but who doesn't? It's something Seokmin was very familiar with, hence him always having to pick up wherever you left off. He also knows just as well that once you've settled on something, you'll see it through to the very end. Eventually. 

Which normally works out in his favor except in moments like now. So he resorts to a different preventative measure — tickling the decisiveness right out of you.

Like hell you'll let him do what he wants.

Maybe the whispers about him being soft for you were right. After all, it's to your utter benefit when you push at his shoulder. Only a bit unbalanced, he easily falls onto his side and you scramble to climb on top of him at record speed, one arm pinning Seokmin's wrists against the pillow beneath his head. 

Unfortunately, this looks like one of your 3,718,493,842 very bad choices in life. Once again, something you didn't think all the way through. Sure, you've bested Seokmin at light wrestling and play-fighting before — back when you were toddlers and all he did was cry.

Now, at adult ages, it seems like a horrible, terrible, very bad idea to have him beneath you. Your fingers play with the hem of his black t-shirt that's ridden up ever so slightly, unbearablely close to the leather band of his silver belt buckle. 

Seokmin's pupils are blown wide as he looks up at you with a strange, almost starry-eyed look of surprise. Black bangs flipped up across the dark gray of his blanket, silver chain askew shining against his collarbones, mouth slightly ajar.

Suddenly you're hyper-aware of sitting right on top of him, completely obliterating the distance between your bodies earlier, and leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination from what you can feel nestled in between your legs. 

"Would it be inappropriate of me to take your shirt off right now?" you can't help but ask.

He laughs, all breathless and high-pitched like he does when he's nervous. "You're asking for permission?"

"Seokmin," you whine and shift your hips in protest without thinking. Another bad move. Oops. "I'm trying to be polite."

"You have me pinned to my bed with the intent to strip me and you're worried about being polite?"

"Oh, please, you could easily break free."

It's true. His wrists twitch a bit under your grasp, almost like he's attempting to do just that but you're faster once more. Or he's just letting you have your way with him. Whatever the case, your other hand firmly holds both of his down which only brings your faces closer together.

"Don't move."

"Okay," Seokmin agrees and licks his lips, "at least you know what consent means."

"Are you consenting?"

"Depends on what to."

"Me taking off your shirt."

"… Should I be flattered?"

"Very."

Brown eyes close, his brow furrowing. For a minute, you think you've accidentally taken things too far and are about to quickly apologize and backpedal before things backfire until his lips quirk up and Seokmin snorts.

"Never imagined you'd be stripping me like this."

You would agree because what the hell? All this for some abs? But the way he says it makes you pause.

"Have you imagined this before?"

Expecting him to panic or something, you're even more taken aback when he bites his lip like he's holding back more laughter. 

"And what if I have? You'll be offended even if I lie." 

You narrow your eyes challengingly while his sparkle. "Are you… flirting with me?" 

"That is not how I flirt but okay." 

"You're being weird. Weird weird. Like super-duper weird." 

"Says the one soaking my jeans, right now." 

You want to scream. Instead, you let out a scandalized gasp, eyes widening. The effort it takes to bolt away means you must release Seokmin. Something that doesn't even cross your mind with the shame heating up your cheeks, mortification setting off every sirening alarm in your nervous system.

Your first mistake.

Countless other mistakes will be made after this, but looking back — could they really be watered down to just a mistake after the end results? Why you're even so embarrassed in the first place is beyond you. And your best friend has zero intentions of letting you get away from him.

The minute Seokmin's hands are freed, one flies to keep your hips pressed against his while the other gently braces your back. Lifting his torso up with insane core strength he clearly was lying about not having, you have no choice but to wrap an arm instinctively around his neck like a koala. Your other hand curls into a fist, clinging against the fabric straining with the flex of his chest muscles while simultaneously attempting to push him back in a futile effort.

"Breathe," Seokmin murmurs in mild concern. His eyes crinkle as he smiles encouragingly. "Breathe for me, babe."

You hadn't even realized you were holding your breath. If you inched any closer forward, your nose would brush against his, and leaning too far back would end up with him on top of you again.

"This is all your fault, babe."

"You're the one that started this in the first place, babe."

"All I wanted was to see your abs," your voice drops to a pathetic whisper, "babe."

"All you had to do was ask, silly."

"I did!"

To your horror, he leans in even closer with a devious smirk so his nose brushes tenderly against yours. "For yourself. Not others."

"What… what are you playing at Seokmin?"

"It's like you misinterpret everything I do on purpose."

"I — "

"If you think I'm just playing around you're sorely mistaken."

A beat of silence. "Then what are you doing?"

"Nothing," he says innocently even though the hand on your back trails upwards and not-so-innocently unclasps the bra underneath your shirt. 

Your jaw drops. Of course, your modest top is still on and the shoulder straps keep your undergarment in place. Yet, you feel naked with the way Seokmin shamelessly ogles your covered chest and lets out a satisfied groan, pleased that you weren't wearing a sports bra. After all, it's not the first time he's done that for you — but it is under this strange context.

"Seokmin — "

"I'll do whatever you want me to do. Tell me." His voice is low, rougher than you've ever heard, causing tingles to shoot down your spine at the way he says your name. "I should take full responsibility for whatever happens."

His last sentence echoes over and over inside your head because yeah, what the hell is going to happen? — until you blurt out, "You find me attractive?"

Finally, Seokmin acts the way you expect and are familiar with, his shy demeanor coming out like sun rays peeking through overcast clouds. Bowing his head, forehead flopping on your shoulder, he admits defeat. 

"As if that's even a question, goofball."

"No way — there's no way! My bestie, you, find me, your bestie, like. Hot?"

"Look, I know it's cliché to fall for your friend and all that stupid shit," he grumbles, "but you don't have to sound so shocked. I already know thanks to Mingyu."

You freeze. "Know what?"

"… You're really going to make me say it?" he laughs in disbelief and shakes his head against your shoulder, causing your loose strap to slide down. "When my pride's already in tatters?"

Urging Seokmin to pick up his head and look at you, you face his brown eyes straight-on and cup his flushed cheek. "What did Mingyu say that crushed your pride?"

He sighs. "He told you I liked you before I ever got the chance to say it myself to you."

Your eyebrows raise. "He did?"

"Yeah. And I thought you just. Well. I don't know, I thought you were just ignoring it out of consideration or something. Obviously. Since you didn't say anything."

"… All 'cause I was pretty sure he blabbered about accidentally spilling the beans to you about me liking you."

The both of you pause, silently cursing poor Mingyu. He did mean well. Somehow.

"You're joking right," Seokmin whispers, "is this real?"

"What makes you think it's not."

"Because you've only ever returned my feelings in my dreams."

Your pride swells at that, wrapping your arms around his neck daringly. "Dream about me often?"

He falls backward on the bed, taking you down with him with your bodies pressed tightly together. You admire his handsome features with renewed thirst while he shuts his eyes, no longer forcing yourself to view him through the platonic lenses you'd kept on for so long.

Then his eyes flash back open and you flinch at the burning desire blazing within them. He's never looked at you like that, at least not directly and it ignites the equal yearning you feel for him like a match.

"Yeah," he answers your teasing question, "I do."

Just the thought alone makes you dizzy. Your best friend, your sweet and lovely Seokmin who puts up with all your bullshit, laying here on this exact bed with thoughts of you consuming his mind. Pining for you. Wanting you. Shit, you think he deserves to have all his fantasies come true. And you're more than happy to help him out. 

"What do we do in your dreams?"

"Everything. Anything."

An iron-clad grip will probably leave bruises behind but it's not enough to stop you from a slow, lazy grind of your hips. You sit up for more leverage, hands on his broad shoulders for support, watching with smugness oozing out of your smile as he struggles to continue his wholesome thoughts.

"Holding hands, cute dates, buying you pretty things… "

"C'mon babe," you tease, "what else?"

"Ah… " Seokmin sighs, throwing an arm over his face to hide his eyes though it can't hide the flush creeping up his neck, to his cheeks, and coloring his cute ears. "You know… "

"Nah, I don't. Not unless you tell me." 

"… Just gets lonely in bed. At night. Cold."

"We've slept together before when I've stayed the night and vice versa."

"Mhm, but never with my dick inside of you."

You coo, trying to keep up your unbothered façade as though the quickening pace of your hips isn't making an insane mess of his lap. 

"Poor little Seokminnie had to jerk off all by himself." Leaning down to whisper maliciously in the ear that isn't shielded by his elbow, "Or did you do it while I was laying next to you because you were so frustrated?"

"As if," he scoffs, "and I'm not sure what you mean by little."

Like a switch has flipped, two hands return and grip your hips, keeping them stationary. To prove his point hard, it's Seokmin's turn to grind his pelvis up into the moist heat of your covered cunt while holding you still to feel every agonizingly delicious drag of his cock. The way he can feel you pulse against him even through your thin shorts, the devastating whimper that leaves your mouth when the rough fabric manages to catch your clit just right make up for the mildly gross stickiness of precum inside of his jeans.

A sadistic grin leers at you, almost a snarl. Such a jarring contrast to the normally soft, fond looks you're used to and a shudder runs through your body at the shock, another rush of heated arousal dripping from your pussy.

It's cute, Seokmin thinks to himself, how you put up this act and think you're the one in control when it's really me, the one whose lap you're on.

"Can you even blame me?" he growls, not waiting nor expecting any answer as he sits back up, jostling your body in the process. "I was so good, so well-behaved in front of you. And yet you waltz around me with barely anything on all the damn time, flirting with all my friends in that skimpy bathing suit without a care in the world… "

You don't even know when you ended up on your back. Staring wide-eyed into Seokmin's narrowed ones, his eyelids fluttering as he recalls these memories, fist clenched and arms tense as he towers on top of you once again. He's panting, lower body still pressed against yours.

"Batting your eyelashes at me, giggling, grinding that sweet ass all over me on the dancefloor and then skipping away even though I wanted to touch you so badly… and if that's not torturing enough, constantly showing up in my dreams, always out of reach… So yeah, I'm just a little frustrated, sorry."

"I'm… I'm… I-I didn't know — "

"I know that. I know that and that's why I felt like utter trash. You didn't mean any of it and here I am throwing my disgusting fantasies on you."

"Don't say that," you plead and cup the side of his face, running your thumb repeatedly across his mole. "You're not trash, Seokmin. I wasn't thinking — I mean I didn't realize… I just — "

"Please," he interrupts suddenly, desperately begging. "Please tell me… if this… if this is going to be a spur of the moment, out of pity, and a one-time thing… please tell me you don't want this. That you don't want me — "

"I want to kiss you." 

You watch his body tremble before he takes a deep breath, smiling up at him as his eyes gradually open. They blink owlishly at you, nearly crossing in his attempt to scan your face if he really heard you correctly as you guide him by the jawline close to your lips.

"I want you, Seokmin."

To be honest, you've never really imagined what it'd feel like to kiss your best friend. The movies you've watched make it out to be magical, enchanting, and something out of a fairy tale. Sure, maybe they're not wrong but the majority of entertainment is the bad boy turning sweet or a soft boy remaining a gentleman.

Nothing's prepared you for awakening the beast in a good boy.

He kisses you with a ferocity that steals your breath from the get-go. A sensual clash of teeth, tongue, spit, love bites, and nips. Seokmin always had an enjoyable, pleasing tone to his voice and it sounds even better when he's grunting and groaning in the laidback battle for dominance.

Somehow, your clothes are merely disheveled and not ripped off despite continual tangling and grabbing at each other. Once again, you find yourself back on top as you gasp for air — having to push him away when he chases after you for more kisses. If you thought he was pretty before, he's even lovelier with shiny, swollen lips and a dazed, hungry look in his eyes.

Despite pouting at the sudden distance, the man astonishingly looks at you like you've hung the stars in the sky. As if he's never seen the ugly sides of you, your lowest and most embarrassing moments. His gaze trails from where you sit on his thighs to the rise and fall of your heaving chest to your blown-out pupils with such appreciation and awe that your cheeks are set aflame.

Although maybe you're just seeing a reflection of your own adoration. Running your hand down the toned length of one of his arms, you intertwine your fingers together. A smirk returns to your face as he squeezes back, distracted.

"So, can I see your abs now?"

Seokmin groans your name and chews on his lip, uncertain. You shrug and toy with the hem of your own shirt before decisively pulling it over your head. A blissed-out sigh escapes his mouth at the reveal.

Your bra is undone — thanks to his earlier mischief — and barely covers your breasts. Threatening to fall off at the slightest move, you pretend to protect what little modesty you might have and keep it in place with a free hand. 

"Tit for tat?" you tease.

He audibly gulps and you watch his Adam's apple bob. You wait patiently, letting him go at his own pace and back out if he wants. Though he does relent because he feels at comfort with you, revealing his gorgeous tan skin and upper body you hadn't seen in what feels like years.

"Omigod…" you gasp out and he cringes, upper body taut with nerves. "You've been hiding a six-pack away from the public for so long?"

"I — "

"I want to touch them."

"Why are you so obsessed with my abs?"

"'cause they're mythical. Like unicorns or… or Bigfoot."

"You're comparing me to a yeti?"

"Not yet…i!"

He rolls his eyes at the ridiculous pun. "I thought I was getting a 'tit for tat'?"

"Yeah," you nonchalantly slide off your loose bra and toss it somewhere on his bedroom floor. Seokmin doesn't even get to relish the bare sight of your tits for his own enjoyment because you're grumbling, "can't even show his best friend his fine ass abs," and he has to correct you.

"Maybe if I was your boyfriend, I'd show them to you all the time."

"Oh? Is that a promise? A threat? A distraction?"

"An offer. A suggestion even."

"It's pretty tempting," you play coy, "can I touch you if I say yes?"

"Only if I can touch you too."

"Then yes." Your pointer finger travels down the flexed crease of his skin to right above his belly button. "Can I see your dick now?"

"But I want… I'd like to… taste you."

"Later," you assure and daringly place a kiss above his waistband. Your hands tug at the belt when his hips stutter upwards. "Please?"

He's gone the moment you flutter your eyelashes at him and so are his ruined jeans. Discarded on the floor to join the growing number of other clothing when he says yes. 

Even Seokmin himself would admit he is indeed too soft for you but his cock certainly isn't. Your eyes nearly bug out when it flops against his stomach, angry red and leaking tears of precum. He grits his teeth at how much it aches, perfect jawline even more prominent. 

His self-esteem would have been dashed to pieces at the devastating frown on your pretty face but it's greatly inflated when all you can do is whimper out, "You're so big… "

"Yeah?"

Your best friend — no, now your boyfriend, you suppose — hisses when you blink at him. 

"There's no way you're gonna fit."

"Hah, 's never been a problem before." Nails dig into his thigh, the little show of possession at the mention of his previous partners wickedly giving Seokmin another ego boost. He's quick to try and appease you though by saying, "don't worry, babe… let me prep and taste you, I'll make it fit I promise and you'll feel good."

"Fuckin' sweet talker." You feel a hand reach out to temptingly slip under the band of your shorts. "Everything about you is always so sweet."

"'m sure you taste even sweeter." 

"Seokmin…" 

"Hm?" His touch grows bolder at the moan of his name, squeezing at the plumpness of your ass. "Will you please let me have a taste? Just wanna help you out." 

You won't be thinking I'm so sweet after this. 

Eager to touch him, you nod and start to take off your shorts but Seokmin is faster. Nearly tearing them off your body in excitement and somehow managing to position your bare lower body right where he wants it. 

Luckily, you're able to face his neglected cock. A shriek leaves your mouth, though, because the hardened tip of his tongue is searching for your clit, lathing and suckling on it when he does find it. 

You try to focus on your prize but it's difficult with the vigor he's attacking your throbbing, needy pussy. Seokmin holds you up high enough that he can leave occasional nips on the inner crease of your hips before harshly licking and sucking up your messy arousal. Shaking his head back and forth with an animalistic growl, all you can do is resort to pitiful kitten licks and slobbering mindlessly on just the side of his cock. 

The more you attempt to wrap your lips fully around the tip, the further down he brings you to his mouth until you're almost suffocating him. A brutal assault where you can only twitch your hips to which he agreeably grunts, gliding you across his open mouth ever so slightly. Unable to escape the throes of pleasure, not that you would want to — you give up and give in. 

Tears fill your eyes as your body convulses and shakes, staring longingly at his cock through bleary eyes. Seokmin's muffled moans as he gladly helps you ride out your orgasm with your fluttering hole clamping around his tongue barely registering in your ears. You feel like you're floating while underwater in the most delicious of ways. 

Seokmin manages to nudge you enough so he can catch his breath while waiting for you to come back to him. A fond smile on his lips when you're finally able to move and he helps you flop by his side. 

"Why on earth are you a pussy-eating pro?" 

"You keep complaining about things most people don't find fault in." 

"I wanted to suck the life out of you, not the opposite." You reach for his cock again but he stops you — again — and rubs the back of your hand consolingly while he wipes the wet mess you'd left on his face with a smirk like a badge of honor he takes pride in. "Lee Seokmin!" 

"Shhh, don't whine, baby. Almost there, I'll let you have my dick soon. Give it to you real good. Now that I've confirmed what a tight, good little pussy you have for myself, gotta make sure you're stretched out enough. Don't wanna hurt you." 

"It already hurts, 'm so empty, 'min." 

"Greedy," he snickers, knowing you're full of shit, and sits up. "After I just stuffed you with my tongue so well that you complained about it, now you want me again?" 

"Always want you. Always have. Didn't realize it before but it's true. 'm sorry, Seokkie, need you so bad though." 

"Lucky I like you so much. Now turn around, let me see that lovely ass of yours." 

You do as he says, clambering up on all fours and arching your back prettily, looking over your shoulder to see what he'll do next. 

The sight alone is a wet dream. He's licking his lips, brown eyes honed in on your puffy, seeping cunt until he's snapped out of the trance when he realizes you're watching him. He sticks out his tongue to pull a silly face and you shake your head in disbelief. 

A finger traces up your spine before it turns into his palm pushing down between your shoulder blades so your cheek is pressed into the pillows. You can just feel the heavy heat of his cock but he pulls away before you can savor it for too long. A constant tease that leaves you whining again in frustration and wiggling your hips enticingly, a futile effort. 

"I know you're desperate. 'm sorry, don't wanna cum too fast and disappoint you though." 

"You won't disappoint me." 

"Nope, I'll make it worthwhile. Promise. We can do whatever positions you want after this. I'd like to see you riding me like you do in my dreams, personally." Watching how you clench at his words, he chuckles. "Knew you'd like that too. Now, let's see…" 

He slips a digit inside your hole muttering, "There we go," and adds another. And another. Three fingers explore your gummy inner walls and he hums in contemplating tones before he begins scissoring motions to get your pussy to further open up. 

Your moans are muffled by the bed and Seokmin simply increases his pace to make them louder with a sneer of satisfaction you don't see. You do feel him kissing down the length of your spine, more love bites that make you squeal at each pinch. 

"So cute and perfect. What 'm I gonna do with you?" he asks and pretends to understand the unintelligible garble to his rhetorical question. "Yeah, that's right, babe. Fuck you even more stupid than you are now 'cause it's what you deserve." 

Retracting his fingers, licking them clean, and mumbling how pretty you are — then he's finally wrapping a veined hand around his even veinier cock to tease at your entrance. 

He plays with your wetness, coating his tip with it and making both your mouth and pussy drool. And god, does Seokmin relish the vision before him. 

You're everything to him and that thought alone makes him bite down on his lower lip, a bead of sweat trickling down his forehead. He doesn't want to fuck this up. Every muscle in his body tenses when he takes a deep breath and eases himself inside, enraptured with the way your soft pussy lips part and cling around his length to welcome him. 

When he glances up to check how you're doing, he has to reign himself back from exploding or thrusting insensitively all the way in. The way your eyes roll up, a stain of drool left on his blanket, and the feeble thank you's followed by a filthy series of moans — he lets out a string of curses that would make even a depraved whore blush out of shyness. 

"S'big, s'full," you hiccup, clenching and unclenching in rapid successions that has Seokmin wheezing, though he tries to comfort you. 

"'m not even all the way inside, sweetheart. Bear with me, babe. Breathe. I've got you." 

"Got me… hella fuckin' full."

"You can take it. I know you can." He pushes his hips forward a bit more. "There you go, sweetheart. Relax just a tiny bit… Yeah, that's it…" 

Praises fall from his lips and you sob at both the goddamn stretch and unfathomable pleasure. You already feel him buried in your gut reaching spots you didn't even know existed by the time he's almost bottomed out for his pelvis to press temptingly against your ass — you're pretty sure you can feel him in your lungs at this point.

"S'deep…!" 

"Feel so fucking good… d'ya need me to pull out a little, baby? You still with me?" 

You answer him by bravely using whatever strength — or more like the urge for him to split you open and take it all because you want to be as good as he's telling you that you are for him — and push yourself back so he's fully seated within your tight cunt. 

You're probably screaming if your raspy throat and ringing ears are anything to go by. He's panting and rubbing his forehead with a groan. 

"Fuck, what are you so hot for?" 

The air feels like it's been punched out of his lungs, the same way his cock is being suctioned and squeezed. In an effort to wrangle whatever control is left within himself, Seokmin focuses on your body and how it reacts. Laying over your arched back to press your bare bodies close together in an intimate fashion. 

You can feel his necklace and its cool touch on your burning skin. The recollection of never seeing him without it since gifting it to him reignites a possessive streak in you and has your pussy pulsing around him more fervently. Suddenly you long to have his mark engraved on you permanently, etched into your body and soul just like the inanimate object. 

It's almost a shame when he pauses to tug it free so it doesn't break and let it hang over your shoulder instead. Not that it matters much, for you'd only have a temporary imprint of a dog tag shape on your back. 

As if he can read your muddled mind (he probably can), Seokmin makes up for it in his concentration to delay his dizzy cloud of absolute unbridled lust. He's already left many physical reminders of his touch where you'll definitely be sore later scattered around your body and as a bonus — bites down where your neck meets your shoulder. 

(You have no idea how you'll explain the obvious teeth marks to your friends the next day but you know they'll know. Especially when Seokmin — the little shit that he is — shamelessly shows off the various marks you'll leave all over him later tonight.)

But you don't think about that right now, any and all thoughts consumed of him, him, and him. You're full. So full. Oh, how you ache to run your fingers across his gorgeous body the same way he's able to yours, sneaking a hand underneath to fondle at your breasts and tug at your nipples. You suppose that can wait, already inching toward another crashing orgasm when he's unable to stay still anymore and starts shallow, cautious thrusts.

"Mm, ah, 'min… Seok… min… "

"'m here baby, you're gonna cum for me already, aren't ya?" He pulls his dick out far enough to see the way your essence glistens and coats his length and then smoothly stuffs you full again. "Go on and cream on my cock, make me yours."

Shockingly you shake your head. "No, too soon!"

"S'kay, I know you can give me another one after. If you let go now, it'll feel even better after. You're still so tight, I can barely move."

You really can't believe you're about to climax so soon again. There's not really a choice to hold it off anyways, especially when his hand moves away from your tits and mercilessly rubs your clit. He could've just fucked your throat raw with how hoarse your voice is now with all the sounds he's drawn out of you.

As you recover from the fuzziness of a second orgasm, he'd taken out his cock that's basically gone numb at this point (he's not sure if that's a good thing or not), and appreciates the delectable view of how your hole has been stretched out perfectly in the shape of his cock to accommodate him so sweetly. It all screams I am Seokmin's and he fucking adores it. And you.

There's only one thing left to do. Paint you with the color white.

"You ready for me?" 

You breathlessly huff out a yes but honestly, you're unsure if you will be able to handle another peak without passing out. Seokmin soothes you, whispering that this will be the last one for this round accompanied by two chaste kisses on each of your shoulder blades. So wonderful and perfect, he reminds and suddenly you can do anything he asked of you.

Which is good because he's finally snapping his hips hard and fast with better ability, drilling into your warm, wet pussy he calls his that confirms that ownership itself with filthy noises of agreement and gushes of more arousal. You moan out a mix of yes, yours, and his name — growing so fucked out that when he asks you where you want him to cum, all you do is feebly bounce your asscheeks against his abs when he refuses to move.

"Shit, you gotta tell me now or I'll… fuck, I'll do it inside. I-I know you're on the pill but… "

"Please…"

"You'd look pretty with it all over your back but also spilling out of your pussy… "

"If you don't cum right now anywhere… I'll cry."

"You're already crying." His thumb brushes at the trail of tears that spilled over your eyelids.

"Seokmin…!"

"'m sorry, let me give you what you want."

His hips resume slamming at a rapid pace, hitting deep within that magic bundle of nerves without fail. Stars swim in your vision and the mind-numbing pressure twisting in your lower gut builds up without warning.

It's a silent scream this time and a peak that doesn't seem to end. As your body violently shudders and shakes for what feels like hours at its intensity, Seokmin's release is triggered. Gently thrusting as you spasm around him, milking his cock as it starts to fill you up with a comforting warmth. In a daze, he's forced out by the end of your explosive orgasm and watches with a slack jaw in awe.

He's managed to leave beautiful lines of white across your ass and back as intended. Though the bit he'd left inside of you is mostly expelled by you squirting and coating his thighs with your release, if he looks close enough, there are still globs of cream left around the outer lips of your cunt that has him groaning.

"This is better than what I've dreamt about."

"Of course. Real thing is always better."

"In this case, yes." 

"… Do you still think I'm sweet?"

"… Somehow, yes."

Seokmin laughs as you collapse flat against the bed. You need to clean up but both of you can afford to rest a little first. He lays down next to you on his side, bringing you into his arms and you immediately snuggle your face into his chest before fixing him with a serious gaze.

"I don't get it."

He stiffens in fear. "Wh-what?"

"You fucked your previous partners, right?"

"Um… most… of them… "

"Like this?"

"Uh… " he narrows his eyes. "What… what do you mean?"

"There's no way they would've wanted to let you go if you got a stroke game and stamina this good. Unless you were just too much of a beast in the sheets — which I could understand."

His arms tighten around you. "I'm sorry, did I go too hard on you? I just didn't wanna cum too fast."

"No, you're insane but it was… incredible. You're the unreal one here."

"Didn't expect that when you harassed me about my abs, huh?"

"I did not harass you and of course not, did you?"

"No, but… I'm glad it did. You… don't…  you don't regret it, do you?"

"No, why would I?" He breathes out a tiny sigh of relief which has you raising an eyebrow but you continue on. "I don't get why they didn't try harder to stick around. I mean you're perfect. In all aspects. I one-hundred-percent mean that."

"They weren't you, though. I'm sincere when I say you've always been the one. I was just afraid…" 

"You're a damn good actor, you know that. I had no idea."

Your favorite smile beams at you. "I did major in theater. And we're both kinda idiots."

You slap at his chest playfully and he covers your hand with his. "I like you too, you know that? Like really mean it when I say I do. Even if you just obliterated my fucking vagina out of existence."

"There's no way, I most certainly did not." He kisses your forehead. "'cause you still have to ride me like promised."

"I don't think I'll be able to."

Your eyes close, ignoring Seokmin's gasp of shock and protests about cleaning up. He can tell you're pretty exhausted and acquiesces, shifting you into a position more comfortable for you to be able to doze off for a bit.

But you take that opportunity to spring to life, sucking the nastiest hickey on his neck right above his silver chain. One that will take weeks to heal. He lets out a moan as you do it and when you back away, the atmosphere has heated up again.

"You're giving me a hard time," he points out with an eyebrow wiggle and you giggle. 

Urging him to roll over, you lug your aching limbs up and over so you can straddle his upper body. Adding more and more love marks and bites on his chest, neck, and arms. It's your turn to stake a hushed claim of mine whispered into his ears that you nip at. And he giggles, loving the attention you're showering him with.

His cock is stirring to life under your ministrations as is another pool of arousal swirling in your gut. Despite the hiss of oversensitivity and slight pain you both feel, you ease his length back inside. Nearly crying out because this new angle means he's stuffed in you even more, you don't know if he can fit until you're gasping in relief once you're successful.

He tentatively brushes his fingers against the bulge that appears in your lower tummy, wanton moans erupting from both of you at the gesture. It sends chills down your spine and you shiver.

"Gonna have to help me move, dunno if I have enough strength to make your dreams come true."

"S'kay, we have forever to act them out again and again," he reassures you which erases your pout. "You'll get used to me with enough practice."

"You think so?"

"Well, we can only test that theory to make sure."

You giggle as he pulls you in for a tender kiss by the back of your neck. "You're naughtier than I could've ever imagined."

"But you love it. You love me." His smug look only grows at your agreeing hum and when he flexes his abs. "Now, shall we see if all the work I put into my abs is worth it, babe?"

onlyseokmins: February 2023 ©

Taglist: @joshibambi @junhui-recs @pandorashbox @rubyscoups @woozluv @darlingvernon @charcharfairy @httpswonwoosglasses @yeosayang @buffhoshi @horanghae8star @noraehey @misssugarlips @tinkerbell460 @aceofvernons @dejavernon

[agendabymooner]

keeper ! alex a. x ofc (kpop idol!ofc)

"and she my backup like to say she was my plan b. kinda ironic 'cause with her, i'd start a family."

summary: in which polly jintara berkshire, whose friend was an ex of an f1 driver, juggles her role as a blackpink member and alex albon's girlfriend. OR this is just a series of photos showing how down bad the couple are for one another ❤️

content warning: chatfic + tweets, use of explicit language, a lot of dirty jokes (nothing graphic), alex albon is a blink, references to stormzy songs, fluff

note: the title and quote is referring to my favourite tobi and manny song. anyway enjoy xx (i hope my jokes are funny enough)

masterlist

tagged blackpinkofficial, boamckinnon, thepolsci

liked by nicholaslatifi, jennierubyjane, roses_are_rosie

alex_albon kicking my feet when thepolsci pointed and winked at me tbh 😍😩 have my kids pinned by alex_albon

thepolsci no U HAVE MY KIDS 🥰 liked by alex_albon

landonorris absolutely shameless

georgerussell63 this isn't who we are, alex 🤦‍♂️

user1 bro who did you even go with 😭

alex_albon latifi 😊

user2 WHAT ARE YALL DOING IN A BLACKPINK CONCERT EVEN 😭

user3 alexander albon, driver on sundays and a blink every other day 💖

user4 lad i think it's a spider not a snake?

user5 shhhh don't ruin it for him. he's just being himself <3

user6 i just want him to show up one of these days in an interview and begin bonking the other drivers with his light stick like pLEASE ALEX

williamsracing cool stuff alex, but why didn't you take me there -logan liked by alex_albon

alex_albon big kids only, sorry mate. i'll bring the merch to you tho!

tagged thepolsci, ygentertainment, blackpinkofficial

liked by jennierubyjane, boamckinnon, logansargeant

user1 NO ALEX YOU LOOK COOL NEXT TO HER

user2 we gotta humble him- booooo get back in the car albono

charles_leclerc tell her she's very cool liked by alex_albon

alex_albon she doesn't need reminder 😎

jennierubyjane do we go to you for free marketing?

alex_albon no, you'd have to give me pols for the whole year then i can do free advertising

williamsracing this is not what your pr manager taught you and you know that alex

roses_are_rosie don't worry, your level of coolness heightened a little! liked by alex_albon

alex_albon phew! i thought i brought her down to my level tbh

thepolsci don't say that to yourself, you utter dickhead

alex_albon ily

user3 YES ALEX!!!! STREAM MONEY FOR CLEAR SKIN

alex_albon my real skincare routine is money on loop 🎼

thepolsci when we reach 8 figures you can have my kids liked by alex_albon

alex_albon are we talking combined salary for the next few years bc we can start the process now???

oscarpiastri touch grass

logansargeant this is not who we are alex

tagged thepolsci

liked by pierregasly, lance_stroll, danielricciardo

user1 MAN IS THIRSTY

user2 AND HE'S OWNING HIS THIRSTINESS

user3 now this- this is the standard

user4 are you talking about the picture or the guy who posted it?

user3 yes.

thepolsci screaming crying wailing

thepolsci on my knees frfr 😩😭 liked by alex_albon

alex_albon stay there 😇🏃‍♂️

user5 ALEX ?!!!

user6 MAN IS DOWN BAD

user7 if my gf is a baddie and a keeper i'd be down bad too 😭🤭 don't make fun of my boy like that

tagged alex_albon

liked by logansargeant, roses_are_rosie, jennierubyjane

user1 tbh a trip to paris doesn't hurt 🤔

user2 i want him or i want to be him idk 🧐

user3 ain't no way these two just made stormzy references on their posts

user4 girl serenaded alex with sidemen diss tracks before it's no wonder she posted this with a uk rap song 😭

user5 THAT'S PEAK LMFAO

alex_albon never!!!! liked by thepolsci

thepolsci ily bitch

alex_albon aren't you the sweetest 😩

thepolsci say it back 🥲

alex_albon thx buddy 🤩

thepolsci nvm i h8 you

user6 this is an emotional rollercoaster wtf 😭😭

[thegnomelord]

hi, me again. the cruise is fairly okayish for me but my husband (HUSBAND 🥰🥴🥴🥰😍😻😻😍🥰🥴) loves it

uhh moose price (can you tell i like price). moose are pretty like violent or dangerous creatures so he’d be very clash-y. BUT. this only applies if they’re in fall rut or are a female with babies…take that as you will.

oh god im such a monster fucker leviathan ghost (GHOST LEVIATHAN?? SUBNAUTICA MENTION) (sorry). hes jsut so big and 😫😫 wet. im wet. im a man sorry im not wet im just getting wet bc im diving. into the ocean i go. i need myself a big merman or shit to fuck my ass??

im in love with the graves cat idea but instead his goofy ass owns a farm and sees this fucking….feral bobcat….like what the fuck you doing out there boy!?!?!?! anyways graves like snatches this fucking bobcat reader and thinks hes a normal cat. he has made this mistake many times before. his shadows are cackling bc he just posted a picture of his new catboy demihuman to the groupchat. that is a bobcat my boy. or even better, cougar. mountain lion that just needs a little loving (or, hes planning on eating graves. boy dinner. take that as you will)

graves again, now with a singular hunting dog. maybe a beagle. its hunting time :) gotta catch fucking turkeys or like doves. hes so proud of his boy when the pup drags back his shot 😊. i would bark for you graves pleas come home i have diabetes for you like in america

please dont mind my rambles i have so many thoughts i cannot contain them

-❀

Good for your husband lol :Dd

Tbh I would love to see moose price with big ass antlers, see him fighting over you cause it's rut and he'll be damned before he lets someone else come near his mate. And also then pushing you down and riding you, horns and face still splattered with his opponent's blood.

I mean good luck for your ass, isn't Ghost Leviathan big as fuck? But same tbh, I'd love to see a big ass mer 141, can you imagine Soap if he was a megalodon merman? Jesus.

Also I am deffo laughing at the cougar reader getting taken in by graves cause he just can't tell the difference between an apex predator demihuman and a normal cat lol. Big 'accidentally adopted a coyote' vibes tbh. Would be funny if he does like a dna test cause you're kiiiiiinda funky looking for a cat demihuman and you keep getting bigger as he continues to take care of you and feed you. Only to figure out, oh shit, you're a damn cougar! While you're laying on top of him, heavy body pinning him down and just purring.

[literallyjusttoa]

Hey guys! I'm putting out a call for my commissions again for two big reasons: One, Emergencies have caused me to be low on funds when I wasn't expecting it, and that kind of sucks actually. Two, I have a project that I've been dreaming about for years but have actually been able to start working towards in the last couple of months, but to finish it I need to not be living paycheck to paycheck for like a month at the very least, which brings me back to point one :(. I will talk more about the big project under the cut, bc I think it's something you all might really enjoy!

But for now, I will link my commission sheet: Here (It's also my pinned post)

And my new Ko-fi!: Here for if you just want to donate, which would be literally incredible and I would owe you my soul actually.

Ok now for big Project Time!!!

I am in the process of editing and revising my first Youtube video! This has been an on and off dream of mine for like 7 years at this point, but I've finally taken the plunge and gotten to work on a channel. I wanna talk about all sorts of fandoms (including the riordanverse ofc) With videos ranging from plot and character analysis, to trends in fandom culture in general, to fun little ranking videos and speedpaints. All around, I just want the channel to be a fandom hive, where everyone can find something they enjoy.

I already have PNG's created of my sona to use as assets (And I have a sparkly new sona, the one in the pic above!) and I have two finished scripts, with the first one being fully recorded as well! One for my first video, which will be a retrospective on Gravity Falls, and one for a video about the Percy Jackson TV show, the inherent differences between TV and books as mediums, how I think the TV show could improve, and the things I think it got perfectly. I also have a bunch more ideas, such as:

BIG Trials of Apollo video essay, with a focus on how the books and the fandom have effected me over the years.

Ranking all of my favorite characters from all of the media I've been a fan of over the years (This would be over 70 characters)

Explaining the Iliad, but make it funny (with a side of Troy apologia)

Reading Lore Olympus and pointing out how it deviates from myth (the things I'm willing to do for you people /j)

Canon vs. Fanon, where I compare a characters canon characterization with their fanon counterpart and try to figure out how things turned out the way they did.

And more, but I don't want this post to be 5000 words long.

Now here's the big question. As I said in the part above, I'm struggling a bit now money-wise. And I really wanna make this project work, but there's also, you know. Tuition. Rent. Food. Stupid other adult stuff. So if anyone is amenable (and this is totally up to demand, I don't wanna pressure anyone into doing anything!) I was also thinking of maybe making a Patreon. Now, I'd have to do research for this, bc I wanna make sure anyone who signed up would get the right rewards and really get the bang for their buck. I'm pretty sure there's not gonna be much interest in this rn, cuz like, I'm not that big of a blog oof. But if anyone is interested! Here are some of the perks I would definitely be implementing! (sry it's another list)

Early access to videos, and behind the scenes looks at art assets and video creation

the ability to request topics for videos

Patrons names being shown in the videos. And higher tiered patrons getting custom chibis that will be shown in videos as well (and given to the patrons obv)

This ones a bit complicated, but I want to create a cover of a song that has to do with each video to play during their outros. So like, for the gravity falls video, I'm gonna record a quick cover of the Disco Girl song from the show. Only a small section of the song would be in each video, but patrons would get access to the full covers, and be able to request songs to be covered.

Discounts on commissions

A monthly speedpaint that would be exclusive to patreon. Patrons would be able to vote on what the drawing would be.

All of these ideas I'm 100% sure I want to add to a patreon if I make one, but obv there could be more that comes up later. I'm just gauging interest on this idea rn, so let me know if that's something you'd be down to sign up for! Maybe I'm jumping the gun here but I'm just really excited to create and give back to the community and aaahhhhh

Now, no matter what, I'm gonna have this first video out by mid-September at the latest. Because stupid money troubles are not gonna stop me from making this a thing dangit. So look out for that, I'll link the vid here when it releases! But I am just really stressed rn and any support would go a long way towards making this dream come true. And on that note, one more sappy real talk if I am allowed it?

If you've read this far, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. This community and fandom is truly incredible. My blog is about to reach 5 years old, and I've never seen a group of people so accepting and creative and just fun to be around. You guys have truly changed my life, and I wouldn't have the courage to try for this if I didn't have the support you've given me. I know this is super dramatic for just trying to make a youtube channel, but making a place where I could just talk about all the nerdy and overly specific things I care about and share them with the world is something I've wanted for my whole life. You guys gave me that with this blog, and if this channel works out, it'll be thanks to you, so you'll have given it to me twice. I don't have the words to express how much I love this community and all the incredible people in it. So even if you can't support, just know that being here for however long you have been, whether it's the whole five years or the last two days, has done more than you'll ever know. You guys are the best, thank you for everything <3

[konigsblog]

That mlmxreader blog also keeps claiming that you're sending your followers to go attack them and send death threats. They do a lot of arguing that your dark fic is not real dark fic and that you're purposely trying to trigger and retraumatise them - is what I gathered looking at a couple posts...

I think that for one, there are definitely writers who do romanticise some topics unhealthily with things such as rape/assault/torture, but I don't think you're one of those people? Like you frequently tag and keep stating that what you're writing is fiction, it's fantasy.

On that note, they keep trying to argue that CNC is the more "moral" kink to be writing vs. rape. I honestly think that rape fantasy is something people do fantasize about and can sometimes just not be CNC (bc they keep trying to pin it back to that kink). It's the fact that there's no established relationship and discussion like in most BDSM pairings where they talk about rape play. At the end of the day, you tag your works properly. I don't see much issue with writing what you want when you make sure to tag (which you do!) and are aware the subject you're writing about and its usual connotations (which you're also aware!). People can be mad and uncomfortable, but at the end of the day it's them who chose to keep talking about it. I think people need to get used to being uncomfortable on the internet. This is not a new concept and nobody here is a "hero" for anything.

Sorry I just paraphased some posts and asks with some of my own thoughts on it!

i mean, my content is supposed to be dark, it's dark content for a reason, and i'm not describing these characters to be standard; i'm writing them manipulative, vindictive, depraved, ect. i do appreciate you, anon, as you weren't rude, and instead polite. i appreciate it, my dear! 💗

i don't really care about this whole thing, but something i have never said was to send death threats. now, we don't know if they're lying – they could be – but, if they aren't, stop. i didn't tell anyone to send death threats, because i don't condone that. aside from death threats and mocking someone's trauma, i seriously don't care what you want to do. whether you don't block them, block them, whatever, they've made multiple posts directly insulting me in weird ass ways, so i couldn't really care about their immature opinion.

i'd like to point out something they said though, kinda funny, considering they've mentioned me multiple times outside of their callout post. they said they made ONE post about me with examples, that would be their callout post. but, they're not counting how they're talking about me in response to anons, or how they're mentioning me in their hashtags. it's childish. yes, you 100% have the right to not enjoy a certain kink/coping mechanism (because funnily enough, people use different ways to copes) but it's immature to name people, talk about how what i'm doing is "disgusting" or how i'm a "vile cretin" (like what lmfao 😭)

here's some screenshots of what i'm talking about when i say they've even insulted me, or made comments. this is 4/11 screenshots.

and comparing my supporters to an iof soldier... 😬 wtf is wrong with you? that's disgusting.

now, if anyone sends this to @mlmxreader, go ahead and let them know that they're not the centre of the world, them multiple posts taking about me and insulting me is immature on their end.

[livmadart]

First | Next

Shoutout to @blakquill in the tags of my last post for having the same idea as where I was going for this—great minds think alike! Following up this post, they do pose as twins cause for some reason, they *are* canonically identical.

Now all KID needs is a fake name, which I haven’t been able to pin down. Two options I was playing with include some reference to Harry Houdini, who did have a famously contentious relationship with Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (but I can’t think of any version of this name that sounds good if you’re trying to say “Conan and ___), and Penn of magicians Penn and Teller, which does sound pretty good, and is more funny to me bc reminds me of Pen Pen from NGE. Feel free add any other options or ideas y’all have!

Case closed count: 489

[licollisa]

i’d love to hear your take on sans’ personality!

i was going through your whole blog (as you do) and saw ur post on how sans tends to be mischaracterized, but fanon takes are also very normal and generally just fine, and i agree - i feel like some amount of personal spin from the author is always expected (and keeps things fresh and fun to a degree), but i also feel as if sans is a somewhat tough character to actually pin down when you’re writing him, so i’ve similarly had to drop some fic when they stray too widely from my non-negotiable sans traits lol. (like Being Calm and unruffled. bc while some of that is depression, a large part of it is Just The Way He’s Built lmao.)

Oh for sure, I also have my own set of Sans mischaracterization pet peeves in fics (though I'd often look the other way if the fic is well-written because beggars can't be choosers, no writer owes anyone a perfect Sans voice, fanfics are for fun, etc etc. Hell one of my favorite fics of all time portrayed Sans as an asshole and I'm not complaining because good god the writing is just THAT delicious and I still can't believe I'm reading it for free).

E.g Sans calling another adult (often times the MC) with 'kid'. Or like I've mentioned on another post, if he's quick to anger or aggressive enough to attack at the slightest provocation. Sometimes it's not a case of mischaracterization at all, just something I personally can't read without feeling like a wet kitten (the next time I read an overused skeleton related pun I will escape my own and DIE).

I often theorize why this is a Thing. I yearned to understand why I'm subjected to read yet another skele-ton, tibia, humerus, funny bone pun. Maybe since Undertale was popular with a big ass fanbase, and Sans is like our mascot, so when you combine this with a majority of the fandom being in the younger side -- youths full of time and creativity and energy though lacked the writing experience -- what's left of our poor skeleton is a pile of flanderized bones. Which is often the case when you're young and you just started writing because damn that blue skeleton is too romance able to deny (want write... But HOW write???).

You thought of some of his traits you often see (ketchup, touch Papyrus and die, blue glowing eye, epic bones & blaster attacks, puns, depression, have I mentioned the touch Papyrus and die? Puns again, threats, the bad time catchphrase, so on so forth) and you use these as a guiding bible to writing Sans the Skeleton. Boom, Sans x Reader 200k enemies to lovers.

,,,Bottom line is, I'm kind of sure the tendency to mischaracter him stems from Undertale's popularity and the younger part of the fandom. That, or after all these years, people had simply grown to love and accept Fanon Sans in all his slightly unlikeable behavior glory (heartwarming). So the inaccurate potrayal is now, like, on purpose -- on top of fanon him being easier to pin down because the canon guy are too tricky to pin down, like you said.

From what I've seen though, the canon Sans starts to get the love he deserves again! All is good. Now I can read a Sans x Reader 200k enemies to lovers, but with the actual dude this time. Awesome.

Ight, that said. I legit also think people should write him in the way that makes them the happiest. Sans is fictional but your happiness isn't. Even if your Sans will finally be the one to prompt me to escape my own skeleton. Or your Sans is RABID and deserves JAILTIME and GROWLS and BARA. Go wild, be free, and more importantly, have fun! <3

[spoofy-drawings]

I am a HUGE fan of Thomas Sanders, and I mean a HUGE fan. I have three posters, two pairs of socks, two pins, a necklace, a t-shirt, and a Christmas sweater. Hell, I’m even thinking of getting even more merch from him.

I’m in no way happy to make this post, but I feel as though it needs to be said with how angry the fandom is right now.

As much as I love Thomas, and his work, I feel like he hasn’t been paying as much attention to his fan base as he should. Sure he’s sharing his fan art and cosplays, all that jazz, but he really isn’t focusing on the criticism.

Do I love the new anime intro thing? Absolutely. Am I still angry that we haven’t gotten an official episode in nearly 3 years? Also yes.

I love Sanders Sides, and I can see the entire fandom so deprived of content that we’re taking funny videos like the incorrect quotes and the anime intro as MAIN CONTENT. That’s not main content. That’s silly side content you’d expect from a fan, not the actual creator.

I understand why he hasn’t been working the last year, he’s been dealing with a skin condition and I can’t blame him for not wanting to make a whole lot of content bc of it.

However, my point still stands. The fandom is dying. We are starving. We were promised that the season finale would be released this year and haven’t gotten any updates besides some comments he’s made about working on the script.

I love Thomas, but his lack of transparency on progress is making his fan base fussy. I wish he’d acknowledge that and give us at least a little bit of an update. At this point, that’s all we’re begging for.

[pumpkinstrawbrew]

Do you have any NSFW headcanons for batcrow?

gosh, do i ever! 

i’ll admit this ask took me longer than it should have. i had struggled to figure out how to spell my 'main' naughty hcs in like, one page max. but i failed miserably to accomplish this, so prepare yourself for the walls of text instead. somehow, it turned into an essay along the way.

still, to keep this at least somewhat modest leght, i will mostly talk about comicverse two here. the arkhamverse duo requires their own large paragraphs *even if bc there are two slightly different versions of crane within the same universe*, which would make this post even more bulky, than it already is. n' btas one would prob get the same amount of words, that i have for comicverse. so they all will have to wait lol.

but welp, i have to say, i love it when one part of my otp is kinda knows what they want an' what they're doing. while the other one is kinda either fully or partly lost. i find it funny, how bruce n' jon invented chad vs virgin meme, before it was actually made lol. even if it's not all that simple.

either way, i can't imagine a middle aged virgin like crane to know to a ‘t’ what he wants in sex. he sorta / kinda knows what he wants at best, but he also kinda doesn't know shit. as for bruce, while he had a fair share of experience with different people, n’ therefore expirience with different sexual preferences, he’s also kinda…not into anything too specific himself? well, not really. at least from what i saw, it’s hard for me to picture him having some set in stone kink, that he would indulge in with every person he sleeps with. in fact, i feel like he tends to go along with what his partner wants vs what he might have wanted. which adds to all those layers of why having sex with jon is actually a good thing for both of them lol. so my first hc is that while they both clearly would have prefs n' kinks, it's smth that needs to be expolored. bruce have more knowlege about the subject, but like jon, he has a very shaky conection with his own deepest desires. the big bad bat cannot let himself fully enjoy anything. instead, he sticks to 'simple' stuff, that feels 'safer' to approach vs examining those 'hiden' sides of his brain. i think, bruce would be afraid to emotionally rely on someone in this fashion as well. he's the kind of man, who in the end of the day, craves intimicy that he assumed would come with sex. but boy, was he dissapointed. he can still enjoy good sex, but sometimes, it's like all that he can get from it. n' after so many 'fails', he usually would tell himself, that it's better this way. don't show too much of yourself, don't get too invested, beyond what feels nice in the moment. but then, comes jonathan n' throws a wrench into everything, like he usually does by accident or not.

n' i really like how both bruce n’ jon deep down associate sex with romance. or smth inclosed in this vein. with years of heartbreak, bruce clearly abandoned this notion. not fully, but mostly. love doesn’t work out nor does it last. crane is even worse in this sense. he had learned by bitter firsthand experience how not only romance, but compassion is smth that he can’t have. he can only speculate about those things. even if he's so desparate for it, that unlike bruce, he'd be more openly, pathetically pinning for even a small chance of this to come true. he'd be figthing even for a scrap. so it's good, that he n' bruce want the same thing. they can eventually met each other half way. even if they also will have to eventually put their back into it, vs being paranoid about everything.

now as we know, crane clearly has a type *shallow one, but still*, n' bruce is an embodiment of it. the walking imagery of ancient horror figure n’ dashing knight from woman’s romantic novels in one single mix. what a lucky catch for him. on the contrary, jon himself is pretty much everything, that you don’t see in bruce’s many bedmates. crane isn't curvy, nor he openly flirty or daring. even his costume is baggy n' in most designs there isn't any skin showing at all. he does not tempt or seduce or does anything esp attractive. jonathan not anywhere close to males or females, who bruce might have felt lust toward. he’s his own category, n’ this exactly what makes him stand out in a way. body is just a body, but it’s the only part you can see n’ touch. learning that you want to touch someone bc of what you see in them vs what you see on outside is an experience on its own. n' it goes both ways, since while i do think, that scarecrow was at first more focused on batman's looks n' aestetics, it eventually grew into smth else. for bruce, it's the other way around. he was more interested in crane's inner build, even from crimefigthing point n' then found that he doesn't mind how he's looks either. he even finds certain aspects of it attractive. so my other hc, is that crane lusts for bruce first *naturally*, n' then begins obtaining fee-fees along the way.

the next big thing for me, *which i meantioned in the beginig* is that in all versions of scarebat, i picture that jonathan is a prudish virgin, who is also comically horny. basically, he’s one of those people, who would harbor all kinds of longings, but look at everyone else like on a pervert, when they do the same thing lol. crane isn’t himself, if he’s not a huge hypocrite. he’s also not self-aware enough to notice his own slip-ups. bruce kinda does, but he’s generous about it. the only instance, where he won’t take selfish pleasure in bullying jon is this. he, actually canonically seem to leave this subject alone, which is nice of him. even tho, he could like, really drag jonathan about the whole 'handsome, large jock thing', bc no straight man would ever refer to another men like that. but jon is in the closet, without knowing it. everyone else kinda do, but they also never talk about it. rogue's version of bro code bruce certanly won't talk about it, either.

but the favor is never returned, bc jonathan would be on the bat instantly, if he noticed some kind of odd response. it's in his nature to be mean n’ prying. he can’t help himself, even if it goes beyond creepy in some cases. that’s the dual wields of being a deviant n’ a total virgin. he also prob assumes, that bruce will be into females only. n' he's no female. he's just a cranky, ugly twink lol. so if the bat would begin act weird around him, it's breathtaking in its own right. that's like, his wildest *wet* dream coming true. you can't hope for him to be normal about it. crane would throw himself into this, like a sad desperate loser he is. *i'm always calling him those things with upmost love, do not fret*

meanwhile, bruce with all that sexual experience of his *prob less so with men tbh* is kinda not fully sure how to go about things. it won’t take much for jon to cream his pants, realistically. n’ yeah, literally cum before even the main action will begin. i feel like between btas n’ arkhamverse, comicverse crane is the most ‘easy’ one. the other two will at least attempt to calm themselves down to not look ‘stupid’ n’ inexperienced, comicverse jon is like, never this 'cool'. which makes the bat feel a tad torn, since i don’t think that he was with many virgins before, n’ he also cannot just mentally ‘rely’ on his partner doing what he thinks they want from him here. he has to improvise n’ also let himself do what he wants as result, which is so scandalous lol. but he would eventually get that crane won’t do what he wants, unless bruce will start doing it first. the sex was never scarier, than this. where you actually have to enjoy yourself fully [gasp]

humble the ‘sex god’ bruce is my kink, i guess. prob will become jon’s too, once *or if* he realize what kind of ‘power’ he has. no women had this power over the bat. bc bruce knows what to do with them. with jon, he has to learn those things. has to let himself go a bit too. less of cinematic kisses an' grouping with the catwoman, n' more of slightly messy n' fumbling encounter with the 'crow. jon not knowing how to kiss *but agressivly tries to learn* will just add to this lol.

n' while scarebat will always have power struggle / power imbalance in their dynamic, even given their statuses as villain n’ the hero, in certain areas, it might get flipped on its head. in my head, bruce does to a degree view his sexual encounters with crane as isolated experience. n’ he doesn’t know what to do with this revelation, esp bc he has a lot of things to compare it to. bruce is all about self-control n’ strong will, its wild for him to be this…exposed n’ aching for intimacy yet again, i suppose. n’ that’s not even about his pride or anything, it’s just plainly dangerous n’ scary. every fiber of his being would be tense n’ doubtful about repercussions of what to come, if this fails or backfire too. n’ it all despite the fact, that if there is one villainous plot that batman can be certain for crane to not ever use, it’s this. jonathan is manipulative *his faulty brain would make him act like that*, but not in that instance.

on his end, jonathan basking in this new thing, but he’s scared for different reasons. mostly, to be abandoned later on. for this to end for whatever reason. so he might grow more active / somewhat pushy at times. unlike the bat, he has nothing to compare this to, not any other person to learn from / with, but bruce. n' he’s not interested in trying those things to later on use them on someone else, he only cares to figure out what responses bruce has. the obssessive focus, that they share, but that disorientating all the same. esp for bruce. he’s not stranger to have people or his rogues being hyperfixated on him, even with sexual undertones, but he wasn’t in actual center of such an obsession before this moment. in center, where he actually allowed access to his person. it's also new to be with someone, who isn't apt in this or does smth to be seductive or to show off, it's just yet another attempt to figure the other out, just in different ways. an' without ulteror motive for once. tho, crane also be more offten than not selfish about this too, if he give the room to roam so to speak. some discipling be needed from time to time, but this part bruce knows like the back of his hand. jon also knows the back of batman's hand, considering that it had slapped him at least twice during their fights in the past lol.

their sex can be anything tho. rough, gentler, slower thing, smth in between. it’s situational, whimsical n’ depends on the mood of both parties. crane is usually more horny, than bruce. the years of his sexual frustration could move a mountain at this point. he’s greedy, but he also can be sustained with 'lesser' things, which are just as 'big' to him. heavy petting, handjob, just rutting would do the trick. n' this i think, bruce also usually doesn't have time to be doing. or whoever he had sex with, had no time for this.

as for what kinks they might have, well, there is too many to list them all up. esp since sometimes, i can see certain characters having some…uh, weird prefs, that i myself not a big fan of even visually, but in my mind eye, i can see that exact character possibly having it. like, all comicverse scarecrows are serial killers *besides the period of time, where all villains were just robing banks* some stuff would be more intense with jon, than if bruce would simply fucked someone who loves him. crane, isn't just in love or just obssessed, he is obssessedly loves him. so body worship is surely be a thing for jon, when it comes to the bat. n’ not like a cute, sweet kind, but an over-attentive, needy one. the more skin he can acess the better, all while, crane would insist on keeping some of his own clothes on, or his mask or just try to hide his face, since his appearance is the biggest insecurity of his. bruce will have to be crafty about this one, bc for him it’s not an issue. but it’s hard to make it stop being one for jonathan, who had this mentality his whole life. his not pretty or bosomy. dude barely has fat on his ass, but there is a novelty to a figure, that is all skin, bones n’ tight muscle. can press a hand to stomach n’ almost feel up how organs lie there, or a dick. now, bruce just have to find ways to show it.

speaking of dicks, while jonathan had always thought that bat is hung, actually seeing it in person would make him feel odd things. on y’know, masochistic spectrum kind of odd. he won’t mind to be choked on it for one, or that it would often slightly hurt, if he had to fit it inside himself. he does want to be actually wrecked like this sometimes. n’ it’s rare when bruce can let himself be this aggressive with anyone else. even if sometimes, he does want to be mean. he has anger issues, no matter how much he tries to repress them. having someone, who won’t judge him for it or look at him side-ways after those moments will surely help. jonathan knows a lot about the bat’s anger, even if via their stand offs. it doesn’t shock him. or like scares him, if he knows that this roughness isn't out of negative emotions toward him. but then again, i don't imagine that jonathan's thoughts are super coherent, when they intimate together. usually, he's relieved n' happy, that it happens again n' again. n' thinks about details more rationally later. he also understand some 'abuse' n' kinda can ignore the other, so this can be a bit of an issue in some cases. but it's more of specific set up, i think. vs like general one.

on a more specific note, i strictly see the bat as top, n’ jonathan as bottom. i rarely have ships, where characters switch. in 99 cases, those ratios are how i see dynamic in its core. jonathan is very submissive. esp submissive to the bat. even if this doesn’t mean, that he can’t be more assertive, despite being the one who takes it up the ass. even if comicverse crane is usually this, when batman in specific state or when he’s with bruce, not the bat. he still have that mean, bossy stick up there. unless, it's bloodrain version of scarebat, where jon is submissive as fuck almost all the time in every sense n' way. n' bruce is very pushy n' greedy. to the point, where it’s a wonder how crane even survives them fucking so many times in the row. i mean, evil bruce isn’t a very considerate lover lol. even if there is love in it, he's also goes at it like a hungry animal. that particular jon would dig it, but it's not healthy or actually good for him. n' this time around, bruce isn't sane enough to put a stop to this either. but once again, i feel like some kinks / dynamics n' issues can be very specific an' depend heavily onto au or situation, it all happening in. like almost every ship, scarebat can be good for those involved, n' it also can be not very good, or rather clearly dangereous, but it'll be akin to being stuck inside the car without breaks. can as well push onto gas pedal, while you at it, then. or try to jump out of car.

another bit of hc, is that jonathan is pretty noisy n’ whiny. every touch pushes a sound out of him. bruce is more silent, so getting noises out of him is rewarding. crane savors every bit n’ every note, when he gets those. bruce thinks, that jon’s noises are kinda cute. no one was ever this vocal, when he touched them before. crane is also shit at trying to keep said noises behind his teeth. he’s too sensitive. n’ blushes like a tomato too. not very elegant or graceful in that sense, but it’s very real n’ not what the bat is used to. jon still be an incel about it at times tho, don’t worry. not all his comments will be ‘flattering’, bc ‘of course, handsome, big jocks would be good at this’. or ‘what reservations with this a thot like you can have’. but hey, at least, bruce will have smth else to shut him up with besides a fist, this time around. 

i also think, that in aus, where crane involved with either only batman or bruce, he would act kinda differently with both of them. despite, the fact that if he tried to sleep with them both within the same story, he would have figured out instantly that bruce is the bat. while in masks, jon n’ bruce can act tougher, or meaner, but the core is all the same. they are the same dude each time, even if they both love distancing themselves from their maskless attires. i do find it sad n’ funny at the same time, since them being involved like this woudl throw a wretch into this whole narrative. like, who sleeps with crane, the symbol of justice or a man, who the bat claims does not exist n’ only serves as a daytime disguise? n' who earns for such a closeness, the master of fear, who is supposed to be ‘above’ it, or a lil loser jonathan crane, who should be long ‘gone’ n' replaced with sinister scarecrow? 

them being forced to deal with their mental problems, while bumping uglies is the best self-therapy that they can get prob. so once again, scarebat having 'spooky' sex in ways, where emotions are scary is just such a good stuff. can enjoy the ride, but all those pesky 'problems' are still there. like, if their sexual encounter can’t be smth, it’s ‘casual’. full-time commitment right here.

inside crane’s faulty mind, this checks all the boxes. held hands, had a kiss, fall in love, had sex. they are basically married now lol. i mean, he IS crazy, all things considering, so him being able to fuck n’ be close with the bat will only make certain delusions of his way worse. his jealousy will get worse too. gonna throw hands with the joker n' catwoman each time, he sees them near batman lol.

[slowdive1994]

This is an idea that came to me in a dream and please please read it or I might cry bc I couldn’t get to sleep for ages after this

edit: link to the poll: https://www.tumblr.com/literatureisdying/737806048436568064/you-better-vote-yes-yes-no?source=share

edits I am making now after writing the original thing at 1am are in italics

(there is a tl; dr at the bottom under the cut but I highly recommend reading he notesapp word vomit first bc uhh it provides context and it’s a bit funny)(however if you can’t understand the big block of text please dm me/ send me an ask and I’ll explain the whole thing more concisely)

I would like to preface this by saying I am writing this at 1am in my notesapp 

Okay guys I had this weird ass dream where basically @literatureisdying (im sorry you’re the main character 😭😭) made this freaky timed poll where you had to click either yes or no and there was propaganda and everything like atlas was very much on the yes team but some ppl (@bassguitarinablackt-shirt maybe??? also uhh hi new mutual im sorry im crazy &lt;33) were VERY much no (im talking fulling pinning a gigantic image of the word no to their blog etc. and I wasn’t sure what the poll was ab so I went to vote and bc I can’t make a decision to save my life I closed my eyes and frantically tapped at the screen until I clicked an option, I clicked yes, and apparently I wanted smth from atlas in this dream (no idea what) and an the website gave me an option after I voted to request this from atlas (??) so I did and then I went back to tumblr to try and figure out what the poll was about and I got the impression it might be whether someone has a crush on someone (I immediately when to yk who but it might not be) and yeah but I FUCKING WOKE UP BEFORE I FIGURED OUT WHAT THE POLL WAS AB so all im saying is atlas you must create this irl it doesnt have to have a point it can just be all of us being weird as fuck and doing propaganda and being dramatic and adamant and just pure chaos for a week as we rally for our side uhhh ty for reading this ALL imma try sleep now I’ll post this in the morning ig

Tagging some ppl + summary under the cut 

Tl; dr: So basically I want atlas to make a timed poll where we either vote yes or no and then have chaos for a week as we try to advocate for our side

@gently-decaying-flowers @imslowlydisintegrating( I think you guys and asher and atlas were sorta presence in my dream idk probs bc of innocent sin)

@svnflowermoon @tellme-o-muse (you two are away from tumblr atm so lots of <33333 and if you come back and this is what we’re doing yk what we’re talking ab) @bookscorpion73 @astraeasparrow @zzzzzzzzzee @mandythedino @giveuthemo0n @recklessandyoung(yall have to join you have no choice) abs uhhh idk if I should tag more ppl but I will if this flops bye