#piss off december woman t shirt | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

new-sandrafilter · 4 years

Text

Timothée Chalamet and Eileen Atkins Interview - British Vogue May 2020

“Maybe your knuckles weren’t bleeding, but there was ice,” Timothée Chalamet tells Dame Eileen Atkins. He is recounting, with no small amount of awe, how he first came to hear of the legendary 85-year-old actor with whom he is about to appear at The Old Vic. It transpires that Oscar Isaac, Chalamet’s co-star in the upcoming blockbuster Dune, was at the receiving end of Atkins’ fist in Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood (all in the name of acting, of course). Chalamet was duly impressed.

“I gave him the worst time of his life,” says Atkins, bristling at the memory, before merrily launching into several candid, very dame-like stories from her time on set – “That was a nightmare movie. A nightmare.”

It is a Saturday afternoon in late February, and the two actors – one a titan of British theatre with an eight-decade career; the other, Hollywood’s most in-demand young leading man, with an insatiable Instagram following – have just finished being photographed together for Vogue. Chalamet, 24, in louche, low-slung denim and a white T-shirt, has folded his Bambi limbs into a chair next to Atkins, whose hawkish frame, in a navy jumper and jeans, belies her 85 years.

“Do you like being called Tim or Timothée or what?” Atkins asks in her warm but brisk RP, all trace of her Tottenham upbringing erased.

“Whatever works,” he replies in a bright American accent, that shock of chestnut hair falling into his eyes. “Anything.”

“So you won’t object to ‘darling’? I call everyone darling. I’m told I mustn’t say it these days.” He assures her he is fine with it: “It’s a rite of passage, being called darling by Dame Eileen Atkins.”

“You always, always, have to put the dame in, otherwise you can’t address me,” she jokes.

It’s good the two are getting all this sorted now. A couple of days after our interview they will begin rehearsals for a seven-week run of Amy Herzog’s play 4000 Miles, in which they star as a grandmother and grandson, each quietly dealing with their own grief. Chalamet takes on the role of Leo Joseph-Connell, a somewhat lost 21-year-old who experiences a tragedy while on a 4,000-mile-long cycle ride with his best friend. Atkins plays Vera Joseph, his widowed 91-year-old grandmother, upon whose Manhattan doorstep Leo unexpectedly arrives in the middle of the night, unsure of where else to go. What follows is a wonderful, and wonderfully witty, study in human relationships, a portrait of two generations with decades between them trying to make sense of the world.

Its stars, who’ve met twice previously, in New York last year, are still very much getting to know each other – and are confident in the appeal. “There are things like this play – hoping I don’t butcher it – where you can just sit back and go, ‘Oh, this is a delicious meal,’” says Chalamet. Atkins agrees. “I have a phrase in mind that I shouldn’t really say because it’s going to sound terrible in print.” Which is? “I find it a dear little play, a really dear little play. I think it should be very moving. But who knows? We might f**k it up.”

It’s unlikely. Atkins has been a regular on The Old Vic’s stage since the 1960s, going toe-to-toe with greats from Laurence Olivier to Alec Guinness, and fellow dames (and close friends) Maggie Smith and Judi Dench. Chalamet, meanwhile, is a relative novice, with only two professional plays under his belt. But since his turn as Elio in 2017’s Call Me by Your Name (for which he was Oscar-nominated), his celluloid rise has been meteoric. Roles in Lady Bird, Little Women, The King and Wes Anderson’s upcoming The French Dispatch have not only earned him the slightly fraught badge of “heart-throb”, but proved him to be among the most captivating actors of his generation.

He says he couldn’t resist the opportunity to come to the capital. “There was something exciting about doing a play that feels very New York in London,” Chalamet explains of taking on the part. He’s a diehard theatre fan, too, revealing he saw the six-and-a-half-hour epic The Inheritance – twice. “There are films like The Dark Knight or Punch-Drunk Love or Parasite that can give you a special feeling. But nothing will be like seeing Death of a Salesman on Broadway with Philip Seymour Hoffman or A Raisin in the Sun with Denzel Washington.”

Herzog’s writing particularly spoke to him. “Leo’s in a stasis that was very appealing to me,” he continues. “We find our crisis in moments of stasis, but there’s an irony to it when you’re young, because the law of the land would have you think that to be young is to be having fun, to be coming into your own. But as everyone at this age who’s going through it knows, it’s often a shitshow.”

It’s safe to say that, in casting terms, director Matthew Warchus, also artistic director of The Old Vic, has hit the jackpot. He first took the play to Atkins three years ago, but it was only towards the end of 2019 that Chalamet came on board. When it was announced, in December, that Hollywood’s heir apparent to Leonardo DiCaprio would be making his London stage debut, the news was met with a level of hysteria not usually associated with the 202-year-old theatre’s crowd.

“Oh, my friends have told me who the audience is,” Atkins chimes in when I ask who they think will be coming to see the show. “It’s 40 per cent girls who want to go to bed with Timothée, it’s 40 per cent men who want to go to bed with Timothée, and it’s 20 per cent my old faithfuls.” Is Chalamet prepared for the onslaught? “I think it will be 100 per cent Eileen’s faithfuls,” he demurs.

On the surface, they can seem quite the odd couple. Chalamet, raised in Manhattan by an American dancer-turned-realtor mother and French father, an in-house editor at the United Nations, may be living a breathless, nomadic movie-star life but there’s an iron core of Gen Z earnestness there. He arrives on set with minimal fuss, even deciding to wear the clothes he came in for one shot, before knocking out some push-ups, politely ordering an omelette and generally being divinely well-mannered.

He turns on the star power for the camera, though, and I can confirm it’s as dazzling up close as it is on the red carpet, where he has, famously, casually redrawn the rules for male dressing. From that Louis Vuitton sparkly bib at the 2018 Golden Globes, to a dove-grey satin Haider Ackermann tux at Venice last year, he’s a true fashion darling. Then, of course, there’s his dating life – from Lourdes Ciccone Leon to Lily-Rose Depp – that remains an endless source of fascination to millions worldwide. (All this, it must be said, is of significantly less interest to Dame Eileen.)

Atkins started dance lessons aged three, shortly before the start of the Second World War. By 12, she was performing professionally in pantomime, not far from where she grew up in north London, the youngest daughter in a working-class family. A fast-established theatre star, wider fame didn’t find her until late in life. Despite memorable turns in Upstairs, Downstairs and Gosford Park, it was the 2000 television hits Cranford and Doc Martin, when she was in her early seventies, that finally made her a household name. Today, she lives alone in west London, since her second husband, the TV and film producer Bill Shepherd, died in 2016. She has often spoken of being happily childless, and has zero time for razzmatazz.

And yet, despite their differences, the pair appear perfectly matched. They already have their grandmother-grandson dynamic down pat. Atkins does a fine line in mischievous eyebrow-raising, and at one point recites a limerick that is, honestly, so rude it almost makes her co-star blush. Chalamet, meanwhile, is politeness personified, still trying to work out his thoughts on various subjects, less inclined to give so much of himself away. There is a physical likeness, too, in their delicate features and fine bone structure. They share a naturally melancholic look, one that melts away when they laugh.

Their upcoming play, which premiered to rapturous reviews Off-Broadway in 2011, “about a block” from Chalamet’s high school, LaGuardia, could have been written for them. “Other than not being American, I’m very like the old woman,” says Atkins of the Pulitzer-shortlisted play. “I can’t be bothered to learn the internet.” If there’s one thing she won’t tolerate in rehearsals, it’s people on their phones. That’s the only thing that will “piss me off ”, she says, brusquely.

Ah, phones. Are they really the symbol of generational disconnect? “It’s easy to point to these things,” Chalamet says, tapping his phone on the table, “as the cause or the symptom, but I think my generation is a guinea pig generation of sorts. We’re figuring out the pros and cons and limits of technology.”

Equally, Atkins is keen to distance herself from some of the criticism levelled at her age group. “There’s a saying isn’t there: if you’re not very left wing when you’re young, you’re heartless. And if you’re not very right wing when you’re old, you’re foolish. I’m not political, but I’m not with this government I can assure you – and I’m not with Brexit. I wanted to wear a sweater saying ‘I did not vote Brexit’, because it was all old people who did. Not me, not me,” she snaps. “I went on the march.”

Both are in agreement that intergenerational friendships are too rare these days. “So. Important,” Chalamet says, hitting the table between each word. “There is so much to learn from people who have walked the path of life. That’s why I’m so looking forward to these next couple of months.”

Atkins is thoughtful on the matter. “I don’t miss the fact I don’t have children, but I do envy my friends who have grandchildren,” she says. “About five or six years ago I met a couple of young people – they are just about 30 this year – and, do you know, we go out together. And people immediately say to me, ‘Are these your grandchildren?’ And I say, ‘No.’ And they say, ‘Your godchildren?’ And I say, ‘No, they’re just friends.’ Everybody thinks there is something weird about all three of us. They just don’t get it. But the boy makes me laugh more than anybody and the girl is enchanting. I have more fun with them than I do with almost anybody else.”

I remind Atkins about her description of today’s youth as being overly serious. “I do call them the New Puritans, yes,” she says, before motioning to her young co-star. “He probably drinks like a fish.”

Chalamet, currently single, is remaining tight-lipped about plans for his new London life, and how many late-night manoeuvres in Soho or Peckham it may involve. “I’ve got friends here, which is nice. But I’m here for this – to be terrified at The Old Vic.”

Before we leave, there is a final thing to clear up – Atkins’ aforementioned limerick. “Do you know about the Colin Farrell situation?” Eileen asks Timothée. No, comes his reply. “Better get it over with now because someone will tell you,” she says, proceeding to explain how, when she was “69, about to be 70” and filming Ask the Dust with a 27-year-old Farrell, “he made a pass at me. He came to my hotel room. He was enchanting. I let him chat for two hours, thoroughly enjoying it, but no not that. He was very cross I didn’t.”

But then, she explains guiltily, she later told the story during “some stupid TV show” (Loose Women), where despite her best efforts at keeping Farrell’s identity secret, the internet did its thing and news got out. An apology to Farrell was required. “So I left a limerick on Colin’s phone…” she says. She clears her throat: “There once was a **** of a dame…” she begins, in her imitable theatrical timbre, before reeling off one of the filthiest rhymes I’ve ever heard.

There is a moment of stunned laughter. “Wow, that’s sincerely amazing,” comes Chalamet’s response, as Atkins finishes the verse. He gives her a solemn oath: “I promise I won’t hit on you.”

4000 Miles is at The Old Vic, SE1, from 6 April

#timmy #timothee chalamet #4000 miles #british vogue app #Eileen Atkins #my edit

276 notes · View notes

scapegrace74-blog · 4 years

Text

Lost Kitten

A/N Another fic in the Metric universe. This story takes place in 2016, so after The Beginning and Breathing Underwater, but long before Lazy Dancer and Calculation Theme. Previous fics are available on my AO3 page.

Oh, and the song by Metric that inspired the title and a few lines is here.

December 7, 2016, Brick Lane, Spittalfields, London

It was pissing rain in that persistently dreary way perfected by London. Scottish rain at least had the decency to change its speed and trajectory every few minutes, but this was perpendicular monotony. Jamie tugged his coat collar towards his jaw and leaned into the night, looking forward to a warm shower and a dry bed once he got home.

He couldn’t say what instinct caused him to raise his gaze at that precise moment, but Claire Beauchamp was walking towards him when he did. Even swathed in a black pea coat, singular eyes cast on the slick cobbled street, she was unmistakable.

They’d crossed paths a few times since his aborted revelation at the hospital the previous year. Twice at the same pub where they’d met (a meeting she still didn’t remember) and once at a charity fundraiser for Crisis UK. He wouldn’t say they were friends, but they were more than passing acquaintances. By his estimation, that formed sufficient grounds to greet her, rain be damned.

“G’d evenin’ tae ye, Nurse Beauchamp.”

She stopped and peered at him through a curtain of curls, corkscrewing madly in the damp air. Her expression was a mixture of consternation and woe, calling to mind a lost kitten he’d found hiding in the barn at Lallybroch once.

“Hello, Jamie. I didn’t see you there. Lovely evening, isn’t it?”

“Oh, aye. Perfect for a wee ramble in the neighbourhood. Are ye on yer way home from work, then?”

A taxi hissed past, and they both stepped to the edge of the street where a closed shop awning provided poor shelter.

“I would be, were it not for my own idiocy,” Claire responded.

“Lost, are ye? Weel, ye follow the lane until Heneage, then take a left...” he teased, amused by her disarray.

“Very droll. I haven’t lost my flat, only the keys to... wait a second. How do you know where I live?”

It was Jamie’s turn for discomposure. He hadn’t meant to invoke that first night, when a drunken Claire had captivated him, but he’d slept with her friend instead.

“I, err...” he could feel warm blood pumping against the chilled skin of his cheeks.

“Right. Geillis.”

They both cleared their throats and peered off into the gloom, but neither made any attempt to leave.

“Speaking o’ Ms. Duncan, canna she let ye in? Tae yer flat?”

“She’s out on the town with her latest suitor. I don’t expect her back before dawn, if then.”

“Ah.” A rivulet escaped one of his curls, dampening his under-jaw.

“Sorry,” she interrupted his thoughts after some moments.

“Wha’ for?” He’d been trying to locate his misplaced courage. Perhaps it had run off with Claire’s keys.

“For mentioning Geillis’ new man. I know you and she...” She made a vague gesture with her gloved hand.

“Nah. Dinna fash. I was only thinkin’... Did ye wanna come home wi’ me?”

Before he could continue she took two steps backwards into the lane, her face transformed by astonished anger.

“I bloody well think not, Jamie Fraser!”

“That wasna what I was implyin’ at all!” he jumped to explain. “What kind o’ man do ye take me for? I was merely offerin’ a warm, dry place tae wait out the night, but ‘ave it yer way, ye obstinate woman! G’night tae ye. Claire.” He pronounced her name with as much rancour as he could inject into a single syllable.

Truth be told, it was himself he was angry with. He’d made a right mess of the situation each time he crossed Claire’s path, regardless of his intentions. Perhaps he should take the universe’s advice and leave her well enough alone.

“Jamie,” her voice called from where he’d left her, standing in the rain. Despite himself, he stopped and turned. Her arms hung loose at her sides like a grieving Madonna. The streetlight reflected off the raindrops caught in her hair, making them glisten like diamonds. It didn’t matter what she said next; he wouldn’t be leaving her here.

“I’m sorry."

***

Jamie’s flat was in a converted warehouse just off Commercial Street. A wall of windows overlooked a concrete lot dotted with parked food trucks and picnic tables. Water cascaded down the gritty glass, obscuring the view.

“Is your flatmate away?” she asked as Jamie opened the lights and began noisily preparing the kettle for tea. It was after midnight.

“Aye, inna manner o’ speaking. He moved back tae the Midlands, where he’s from. Couldna stand livin’ in London. Do ye take anything wi’ yer tea, Claire?”

“Honey, if it’s no bother. Otherwise, black is fine.”

She looked around the open living area. There was a comfortable-looking couch facing a flat screen TV mounted on the wall. Several gaming console controllers shared the low coffee table with a stack of magazines. A large metal shelving unit took up the opposite wall next to the kitchen, holding groupings of books, picture frames and the occasional potted plant. Christ, there was even art on the walls. What kind of bachelor lived like this? She’d been expecting empty take-away containers and hastily concealed porn.

“Will you stay on here?” she asked, curious. “It’s a lovely space, but I can’t imagine it’s cheap.”

“Ach, no, it isna. I’m in the market fer a new flatmate, if ye know of one. There’s usually a lad at the station lookin’ fer lodging, but I find I’m gettin’ particular in my auld age. This last one snored somethin’ fierce, so as he always reminded me of a con-”

“... congested hippo,” Claire finished for him, startled. Jamie stared back at her until the whistling kettle broke the silence.

He returned from the kitchen with an earthenware mug in each hand. Taking a long sip, she smiled at the saccharine kiss of honey. Jamie sat at the far end of the couch and watched her through the rising steam.

“Ye remember meeting me, then?” he asked cautiously.

“Not until that very moment. You wanted my beer,” she combed her mind for the buried memory. “I made you beg. God, I was an absolute ass,” she grimaced.

“Aye. Ye were. But under the circumstances, ye deserved tha’ lager more than I,” he conceded.

“You were pretty ungracious in defeat, from what I remember.”

“Tha’s constitutional, no’ personal.”

They both smiled, then turned their attention to their tea. Jamie eventually offered her the first shower. Once clean she changed into jogging pants so long they encased her bare feet in warmth and a worn cotton t-shirt that slipped off her shoulder like a caress.

The second bedroom was bare except for a single futon. Jamie had lain out a duvet and spare pillow while she showered. Exchanging awkward goodnights, she entered the room and closed the door behind her.

***

The strobe of lightning woke her from within a dream. She counted to nine slowly before the old bones of the city shook with answering thunder. London seldom experienced thunderstorms, but she’d loved them as a little girl travelling abroad. Snuggling under the covers, she listened for the approaching crescendo.

A bright pulse lit the doorframe, now filled with a towering shadow.

“Christ, Jamie, you fucking scared me! What are you doing?”

The shadow shifted, but didn’t reply. She knew it was him. She’d recognize those shoulders anywhere.

“Jamie?” she asked more tentatively, wondering if he was sleep-walking.

“Go back tae sleep, Claire,” he murmured.

That wasn’t very likely to happen while she was being observed so intently. Something about his voice sounded off. Strained, like he was speaking around a clenched jaw.

She rose and approached him slowly, assessing the situation. Another flash, followed shortly by a deep snare drum-roll. This close, she could see the terror in his blackened eyes. She’d treated enough shell-shocked soldiers to recognize the signs.

“It still haunts you, doesn’t it?” she asked during the next lull.

“Aye. No’ all the time, mind. Bright flashes. Sudden loud noises.”

“So, pretty much every shift you work as a firefighter,” she remarked.

He chuffed. “Pretty much, yeah.” Then continued, subdued, “I’m sorry, Claire. I didna mean tae scare ye. I jus’ thought if I could see ye sleepin’, I would ken I was fine.” He shook his head. “Tha’ doesna make any sense.”

“It’s alright. Let’s go into the other room. Perhaps there’s something I can do to help.”

Sitting facing each other on the couch, Claire led Jamie through a meditation exercise she'd learned in Afghanistan. Counting upwards from one to ten, he touched his thumb to the end of each finger in turn, taking a deep breath for each number. Then slowly back from ten to one, reversing the sequence. Outside, the storm began to abate, and inside as well. By the time the skies were quiet, they were both dulcet and calm, eyes smudgy with sleep.

“Thank ye, Claire. Truly.” He stood at the threshold of her room.

“Think nothing of it. It’s the least I could do, after you brought me in out of the rain. Goodnight, Jamie.”

“G’night. Claire.”

This time, the door remained open.

#my writing #outlander

65 notes · View notes

hybrid-phantom-archived · 4 years

Text

Danny Fenton Social Link (Moon)

“Hey um... you free today?”

You feel your relationship with Danny will deepen.

“Um, cool yeah. Let’s... go do something I guess.”

Rank 6

Amity Park: Mall. Danny brought you here.

“I don’t usually come here that often. Shopping isn’t my kind of thing, but sometimes it’s a necessary evil.”

Danny appears to be looking for a new jacket. Looking at him up and down, it’s clear the sleeves of the one he’s wearing are burned.

“I’m going to have to cut the cuffs off this one too, this is why I wear T-shirts all the time...” he mutters as he fiddles with a charred sleeve.

I take it this isn’t the first time it happened?

How many sweaters do you burn though? +2

“Was... was that a pun?” Danny pauses a moment before a large smile finds its way onto his face.

“I knew I liked something about you. Any fan of wordplay is definitely a friend of mine,” he chuckles to himself.

“The funniest thing about puns is watching people around you cringe when you drop a good one. Or bad. Depends on what you think of them,” Danny continues smiling widely.

“Back on topic though. Yeah, I burn through a lot of sweaters. Don’t even know why I wear them, even this late in the year...” He continues fiddling with the sleeve, a few charred bits falling off.

“I don’t even FEEL cold anymore. I realized it once winter started setting in. I just, can’t feel the temperature change anymore. In fact, I’m starting to prefer cold weather over hot weather.”

“Crazy, right? Sure, summer has summer vacation, but heat just... irritates me. I don’t know if it’s sun stroke or what, but I was just feeling angry all summer long. And it only started after I got my powers.”

“Summer is officially ruined. If the heat alone pisses me off, high school just got a million times worse for me. Not only is it a slog, but the vacation I have to look forward to is too hot for me to even enjoy it.”

That sounds awful!

Why not cool yourself down with your powers?

“Right... I have ice powers....” Danny mutters. “Honestly, I’d rather forget that detail, or that I have powers in the first place, but I need them for the mission.”

“And it’s not like I can magically wish away my heat intolerance. I’m stuck with it whether I like it or not, I guess.” He shakes his head.

“Honestly the jacket is just for aesthetics, If I went walking around in a t-shirt mid December people would get suspicious. So, I kind of have to wear one to keep what’s left of my image in check.”

Danny continues to look through the the clothing rack.

Recommend the thin, blue jacket. +2

Recommend the puffy, red and white coat.

Recommend he just stick with the t-shirt all winter.

Danny looks to the jacket you’ve pointed out. He pulls it off the hanger and puts it in front of his chest as to look it over.

“This one doesn’t look half bad.”

“It looks puffier than it actually is on the inside. It might be a ploy from the designer to sell it at a higher price than it’s worth, but...”

Danny looks at the tag of the jacket. “Huh. It’s actually pretty cheap. Maybe I’ll get this one.”

Danny appears to appreciate your recommendation. He takes it to the counter to pay for it.

You obtained the 👑 “Plain Jacket Costume” for Danny.

“HEEEELP!”

The sound of someone crying for help across the store puts you and Danny both on high alert. The two of you run toward the yelling, only to see a woman and a man squabbling.

The man appears to pull the purse the woman was holding and begins running away with it. They make a dangerous leap off the escalator in the mall and run for the exit.

Danny, in the heat of the moment, shoves his new jacket into your arms and begins chasing the criminal through the crowd.

Follow Danny

Stand there like a dumb-ass.

You quickly muster up your diligence and pursue Danny and the purse thief through the mall.

Danny seems to vanish into the crowd, part way through the chase. You look around for him and the criminal, and eventually make it outside the mall.

Danny seemed to vanish entirely for the moment, before reappearing out of nowhere, changed.

Danny appears to have donned the look of his alter-ego outside of the Shadow Zone.

You and the rest of the team are unable to use the powers of your alter-egos and personas outside the Shadow Zone, so this transformation in the real world must be another of Danny’s powers.

Danny, or rather Phantom, you should probably refer to him by his code name when he’s his alter-ego, has the criminal pulled up by the shirt.

Though Phantom’s eyes are covered by his visor, the fury behind them could be seen by the crowd that had gathered to watch.

“What IS that thing?”

“It looks like a monster, but it’s-”

“Is it trying to take the purse back from that bastard.”

The crowd appears to be muttering about Phantom’s sudden appearance. Being in his more shadow-like form, most of them must be scared of him. The criminal certainly is, and they drop the bag without much more of a fight.

“M-monster!” the man cries. “What the hell are you!? Get the hell away from me!”

“As if! You tried to steal an innocent woman’s purse. And with all this attention on you, I’ll be damned if you get away with it!” Danny declares.

Though he’s trying to look tough, being called a monster and a thing by the crowd around him is really shaking his morale here.

Cheer him on from the crowd. +3

Scold the crowd

Help him keep the criminal contained +1

You mustered up your expression and began cheering loudly in favor of Danny stopping the criminal.

You call him by his code name, of course, and the crowd slowly joins in with your cheering. Danny seems to grow a bit more confident in what he’s doing in that moment.

With the criminal walled in by the crowd, Danny takes the purse and returns it to its owner, in tact and not a thing missing.

The lady gives Danny a shaky thanks and leaves with her purse.

With the purse thief stopped, you see a brief look of sudden stage fright cross Danny’s masked face before he uses his powers to vanish into a puddle of black sludge.

You start heading back home when you see Danny on the path there, back in his human form. He seems deep in thought.

“So uh... with what happened back there...”

It was so cool!

That was really reckless....

You transformed in the real world.

“I did, didn’t I?” he finds himself scuffing his feet. “Not even you can do that, and you’re Team Captain...”

“Something else that makes me a freak, I guess... I can’t even get this personas and shadows thing down properly...”

Danny looks downcast.

“It made a world of difference to that woman.” +2

“You stopped the bad guy from getting away.” +2

“You really think so?” Danny looks up at you, his eyes searching, begging for the validation you’re providing him with.

“I did jump in there pretty recklessly, didn’t I?” he shakes his head with a tired smile. “I wasn’t even thinking. It just crossed my mind that I HAD to do that. I had to stop that guy from stealing.”

“But, now my powers are out there in the world. I’m sure it’ll be making rounds on the news soon... and my parents will hear about it....”

It’ll be okay. +1

No one knew it was you.

You did the right thing. +2

“The right thing, huh?”

His smile slowly returns, the mischievous smirk that always felt so at home on his face finally returning.

“I used my powers to do the right thing. I didn’t destroy anything either...” the smile widens. “I didn’t let my insecurity hold me back.”

“...it felt nice.”

It seems that the spur the moment action has made Danny more appreciative of his powers.

Through the uplifted mood, you feel you understand Danny more.

(Danny’s growth of heart has affected his persona as well. Valravn can now learn Hamaon.)

You returned Danny’s new jacket to him and bid him farewell.

#Going Ghost! (IC)#Verse: Pursuing My True Self #Danny Phantom

4 notes · View notes

texastheband · 4 years

Text

Super Shar

Interview by Simon Gage, Photography by Wayne Maser Taken from Marie Claire UK - December 2001

She's one of the most successful women in British music, but Sharleen Spiteri refuses to let fame go to her head. And she doesn't mince her words about people who do. Here, the Texas singer gives Simon Gage the lowdown on babies, relationships and having Madonna and Guy round for tea. Photographs by Wayne Maser.

'And you need white wine vinegar, which is weird, but it's the secret ingredient,' says Sharleen Spiteri as she jams another slice of toast into her mouth and peers through the steam from a mug of tea big enough to soak your feet in. She's sitting in the television room of the huge house near London's Regent's Park she shares with her boyfriend, Ashley Heath, editorial director of The Face, explaining a pavlova recipe. (She doesn't mention she is making it for Tom Ford, designer for Gucci and Yves Saint Laurent.) The dustbins outside are full of carrier bags from Alexander McQueen - an old mate of hers from way back - and the kitchen is big enough to drive a Jeep around, but it's a homely home, not a stupidly luxurious swank pad. Although goodness knows, it could be. The house is fairly new to Sharleen - bought with the cash she's earned since Texas's resurrection with the White On Blonde album in 1997 made her a multi-millionaire - but it already looks lived in, with books and candles everywhere, a huge Aga and comfy settees. Her mum and dad are down from Glasgow to help her redecorate. Obviously, she could afford to employ a team of painters - she is one of the wealthiest women in the UK, with recent rich lists placing her higher than Posh but she sees this as a nice way of spending more time with her parents. 'And I get a lot of satisfaction from it.' she adds. 'We've been taking thousands of books off the shelves so we can paint. It's one of those jobs where you end up going, "Why the fuck did I start this?", but they're all back now and it looks fantastic.' Sharleen, 33, may be one of the most successful women in British music -the Greatest Hits album is six times platinum and counting but she is not going to let that stop her getting on with painting her shelves and sloping into cafes for junk food. She may have no time for the Mariah Careys of this world - they fell out last year - but to the women in the second-hand clothes shop we stop off at in Camden on our way to Marks & Spencer for bread, Sharleen's probably the nicest customer they'll have all day. The thing with Sharleen is she doesn't do the superstar thing and has a great talent for not being spotted. It's not like she's in disguise or anything - her hair is tied in a makeshift knot, she's wearing 'great label, but low-impact' clothes and she keeps her head up, talking non-stop in her recognisable Glasgow drawl. She even gives me a body-popping run-through of a Missy Elliott video in the middle of a road without anyone batting an eyelid, then goes on to say how shocked she was when a paparazzo tried to take a picture of her nipping out for milk. Shocked not in a 'How dare you?' way, but in a 'Why would you?' way. But that's Shar all over. She still doesn't quite get what all the fuss is about.

So we hear you're about to take two years off. SS: So people keep telling me. I'm not rushing to do the next record. I think people need a little break and so do I. Johnny [McElhone] and I are still writing [songs], but sometimes it's difficult to know where you want to go musically so we had to take a break. Two years is ample time to have a baby. I knew you were going to say that. Even my friends are phoning up and saying, 'Do you want to come to this party?' and if I go no, they ask, 'Are you pregnant?' and I'm like, 'Piss off!' If it happens, it happens. Hell, I ain't getting any younger. You're doing alright, aren't you? Is there anything you still want and can't have? No. I don't think having something you want has got anything to do with being a millionaire [laughs], but you can say that when you're loaded. I've never been happier. I can come and go, see my mates, have them round to the house and just have a laugh. Did you always dream of being a popstar? I never dreamed of being a popstar What defines a popstar? Someone who sings for a living and everyone screams at them. What defines a musician? Someone who does that but no one screams. So, what am I? You're a popstar. Yeah, but am I the same as people like Hear'say? I don't have a group of producers and writers who are writing songs for me and getting records ready so I can walk in and do my vocal. I don't sell newspapers, I sell records. Those popstars who sell newspapers don't sell albums.

Now you've made it, do things still impress you? Like when Alan Rickman phones to say he wants to be in your video? It's funny because [since the In Demand video], women come up to me and go,'Oh, what is Alan Rickman like?' He's lovely, we're mates. There's no bullshit to him. When we were doing the video, he told me he was up for a part in Harry Potter and I was like, 'Oh, my God! I love Harry Potter' When he got it, he phoned and said, 'Do you want to come down to the set?' I was like, 'You're damn right I do.' I took my niece and two nephews. It was so cool. You were supposed to be in Moulin Rouge, weren't you? What part? The Nicole Kidman part, but it would have meant spending a year filming in Australia. Now it's released, don't you think, 'That could have been me'? No. When I say no, it's no. I didn't ever see me doing that part. I was doing The Hush [Texas's fifth album] and that was more important than doing a movie.

What about when Madonna phones to ask you to dinner, does that impress you? My first meeting was at her house, so it's different from being in a popstar environment. It's pretty funny walking in the door and she's like, 'Hi, I'm Madonna.' You're a bit like, 'Yeah, I know that.' But isn't she just like all those popstars with the producers and the writers standing by? I honestly think she takes the music thing very seriously. We played with her and that wasn't a show where you just walk on and go, 'Let's see what happens.' It was very slick. Were you scared of her? Absolutely not. She's very bright - you don't get that amount of success without being bright. And what is Guy Ritchie like? Guy's nice. He's very real. But he gets criticised for being fake. Everyone reinvents themselves. It's bullshit when people go, 'That's not your background and you can't act like that.' I couldn't care less where Guy comes from. You're either nice or you're not. I don't need your family history to be in your company. Have they been to your house yet? No. It's just a case of getting it together. How would you be able to relax? Why wouldn't you? I don't understand. 'Oh my God, Madonna's coming round, I'll have to get the house repainted.' For fuck's sake. The night we went over, it was me, Stella [McCartney], Ash [Ashley Heath], Guy, Madonna, Guy's dad and his wife, and it was dead relaxed, like any dinner.

‘I don’t do cleavage, Cleavage is overrated’ - Sharleen

Did you see Madonna in concert? No. I was really busy. Was she upset? I'm sure she couldn't have given a flying fuck. So if you're not worried about meeting Madonna, what do you worry about? I'm really worried about my niece, because she's being bullied at school. I get angry more than I worry. I'm really bad at biting my tongue. I've seen people's jaws drop in a 'I can't believe she just said that' way. So you don't dream of having a body like Geri? Everyone would like it, but I wouldn't want to do the work. I couldn't bear having to think about it every time I want to eat. That's not living. I think she looks like a very ill girl. I'm just like, 'Get over it.' Would you ever do the bikini thing for a magazine? I don't need to. Some people might find the need to have a photo of them retouched, but I can't think of anything worse than going home after your boyfriend sees you on a magazine cover with your arse up to here and tits ping, ping, and then you go in and it's reality, gravity. Don't get me wrong, I really care that it's a nice picture. If I go into a studio and there's a stylist going, 'We really think...', I'm like, 'No, this is what I'm wearing because this is the way I look.' You have a big female following, don't you? A woman liking me is the biggest compliment you can pay me. After the Elvis video, so many women said, 'Well done, you're so brave.' Why brave? Because it wasn't you in a sexy little dress. I'm so bored with tits and arse. Did you know you were above Kylie and Madonna as the act most requested at Gay Pride this year? I couldn't believe it. I was like, 'Bring it on, the queen has got her crown back.' You've got a big lesbian following. Have you ever been tempted? No. I love women, but I don't fancy them. I look at women and think, 'Man, she's gorgeous.' I'd like to look like Angelina Jolie. I think she's so sexy. I love her big lips and her kooky character, and I find her madness appealing. I don't think she acts it. How does your boyfriend cope with you being a superstar? A lot of men would find that hard. Ashley's not that type. He's a very confident person, always has been. That's what attracted me to him.

When I walk into the East London photo studio about a week later, the first voice I hear is Sharleen's. She's in the middle of telling the team of internationally celebrated photographers, stylists and make-up artists some off-colour stories. The photographer reckons he doesn't know Texas's music, so someone puts on the Greatest Hits, to which Sharleen lip-syncs like a drag queen, throwing in some comedy Mariah Carey moves. As she changes from her white T-shirt into a variety of top-drawer designer togs, most of which she's brought along herself, the only thing that stays the same is her attitude. Halfway through doing a glamorous shot laid out on the floor, she asks if we can see her balls up her skirt, then she comes out in a top with a plunging neckline, pulling the sides together because, 'I don't do cleavage. Cleavage is over-rated.' Are you still big mates with Chris Evans? SS: I haven't spoken to him since he got married, but I really believe that he and Billie are in love. I met her at a funeral with Chris. Everyone is going on about Billie and Chris and you think, 'OK, so Chris has fallen in love again,' because Chris does that. When I met him with Billie, I thought, 'Oh, this is different.' I don't know her, but she was very relaxed in his company, and he was in hers, and I don't see Chris like that very much. I thought she was a really nice girl. I was quite taken aback. But you forget how young she is. What age is she? Nineteen. I never knew she was that Young. Age makes no difference to me. At that age, I was writing I Don't Want A Lover. I still stand by the lyric. Did you go to Madonna's wedding? No. There were only 60 people invited. If Madonna had invited me to her wedding, I would have wondered why. She's only known me a year. Are you going to invite her to your wedding? Who says I'm getting married? [Laughing] That was the cheesiest way of asking me I've ever heard. So ... ? Probably... I don't know how you decide. I always find it horrible when people talk about it. You're big on monogamy, aren't you? I'm a romantic. I think I'm a realist, to be honest with you. Is monogamy a big deal to me? Fuck, yes. If it lasts a week or lasts the rest of your life. So you won't put up with any running around? No. That's like [split sound] material. It's not good. Would you end it even for a minor indiscretion? Yeah. Why would you have a boyfriend? You might as well just be shagging people. Don't you ever fancy a meaningless shag? No. A shag is the ultimate closeness you can get to me, mentally and physically. When I'm having sex, that's completely me. It has to be really special. That's the way I am. You don't think there are different sorts of sex? You're talking like a man; 'I shagged her and it didn't mean anything.' How do you know it didn't to the other person? I think there are lots of girls who kid on that they don't care, but I don't believe women are like that. But I'm not interested in other people's sex lives. I love having a laugh and a great conversation, but you've seen me with my girlfriends and we're like, 'You dirty devil' and laugh like other women. We talk about sex, but not our sex lives. It's an urban myth that women talk about what they do in bed. So what are your thoughts on Posh? Every time I've met Victoria, she's been a sweetheart. Everyone goes on about her, but you still pick up the paper to see what she's up to. She seems pretty normal. Well, not in the sense that I'm normal, but I think she's actually quite normal in her heart.

See the photoshoot: here Read the scans: here Text originally posted on texasindemand.com

#article #greatesthits #marie claire #marieclaire #Wayne Maser #WayneMaser #sharleenspiteri #sharleen spiteri

3 notes · View notes

strongpham · 7 years

Photo

The Dumbest Thing You Possibly Do Is Piss Off An December Woman Funny T-Shirt. Perfect Gift For Woman, Girls, Wife, Girlfriend, Grandma, Aunt... who has birthday on December

#the dumbest thing #dont mess december woman #dumbest thing shirt #mess with december woman #caution december woman #back off #piss off december woman shirt #funny shirt #december funny t shirt #gift for december woman #piss off december woman t shirt #gifts for december birthday #tee shirt #december girls #december queens #birthday signs #born in december #gift for her

0 notes

trendytopshirts · 7 years

Photo

DECEMBER Woman Gift DECEMBER Woman Gift, Don't Piss Off December Woman T-Shirt -- #december #decemberwoman #funny #birthdaygift #decemberbirthday #tshirt #clothing #dontpissoffdecember #queensarebornindecember #decemberqueen #decemberqueens #custom #trending #giftideas #mothersday #womanshirt #cute #cool #dracula #scary #creepy

#back off #birthday signs #born in december #caution december woman #december funny t shirt #december girls #december queens #dont mess december woman #dracula #dumbest thing shirt #funny shirt #gift for december woman #gift for her #gifts for december birthday #mess with december woman #piss off december woman shirt #piss off december woman t shirt #tee shirt #the dumbest thing

0 notes

ameliascorsones-blog · 6 years

Text

Permanent December ▸ chapter two.

a/n: this chapter jumps three years to where the story is currently set. Honestly, this is a little choppy because I started it a few days ago, and finished it this morning, so I apologize for that. Even if things seem smooth sailing right now, it wouldn’t be a good story if things were completely unproblematic, now would it? This is the last chapter to come out before the heart breaking episode airs, so I hope you guys enjoy, another should be out next week, or maybe on the weekend, we’ll see! Let me know what you think!

----------------------

Three years later;

May 6th, 2022

“Hi, this is Amelia Shepherd.. may I ask who’s calling?”

Of course she didn’t check the caller ID, but she hadn’t when the two of them were together, so who was Owen to be surprised? He didn’t even have it in him to be surprised because he knew that he was guaranteed to get an earful in about two minutes anyways so he wasn’t going to be angry about it now, plus she seemed like she was sleeping just a moment before, anyhow. Who was he to harp on what she did when he had Leo for the week. It wasn’t like they were together, and even if they were, he still wouldn’t test it. Still though as he paced the hospital lobby, the strawberry blonde surgeon rolled his eyes. Most people would blame it on frustration but he couldn’t pretend like Amelia’s tiny habits that he still loved didn’t piss him off.

“Can you come down to Grey Sloan? It’s Leo, Carla took him to the park and I guess she let him do the money bars on his own and he..”

Instantly she was sitting up and tossing the covers off, her jaw clenching just like it had that night three years ago, when he’d been on her absolute last nerve just like he was now. “Owen! What the hell, I told you a million times I don’t want your girlfriend around my kid alone! Are you deaf or something? I mean, I give you one rule, and you can’t even follow that! Plus what kind of teenybopper idiot lets a four year old do the monkey bars by himself!” With one hand she balanced the phone, the other working on getting jeans past her hips. “You know I can’t stand her, she was probably on her phone, group chatting with one of her stupid little friends.”

“You don’t group chat with one per —-”

“I don’t care what you do and who you do it with!” Pressing speaker, the doctor tossed her phone down on the bed and tried to blink away tears that had gathered in the corner of her eyes, she couldn’t lose Leo too, not after Betty. Sure, he probably had a sprained wrist, a concussion at best but she was freaking, the therapy that she’d been taking so didn’t prepare her for this. T-shirt tossed to the floor, Amelia grabbed for another one in her clean laundry and took a deep breath. In and out, out and in.

“Are you breathing?”

“No, Owen.. I’m dead.” Yet she couldn’t help the slight smile on her face at his caring words. She didn’t deserve it, not after all that she’d put in through all those months ago after Betty’s passing, but he’d been there for her always. Sure, at first there’d been bitter feelings, but now they were friends, or something of the sort at least and for that she was glad. Running fingers through her tangled hair, she sighed. Good enough, after all it wasn’t like she was going to a pageant or anything. “Is he okay? Where is he?”

“He’s with Alex, they’re picking a cast color for his arm, but I know that he wants you..”

Keys in hand, Amelia struggled through the lump in her throat as she slipped on her sneakers, grabbed her bag and slipped out the door. Only a broken arm, that wasn’t so bad, right? Still though, it seemed the second that she addressed her anxiety in that therapists office a year ago, everything was so terrifying with Leo, with anyone that she cared about but maybe it always had been and it just hadn’t been on the surface until now. Everyone seemed to recommend anxiety meds, something for her depression but she couldn’t take those, wouldn’t. They’d become addictive and that wasn’t something that she needed to happen, she’d been doing so good with everything and she wasn’t about to risk it now. So instead she relied on the people around her, anything to help. “Will you wait for me at the front doors?”

With an agreement in place, the brunette hung up and made her way.

————————-

Short drive and twenty minutes later, the two parents were leading a brave boy from the hospital. They’d planned to have Leo go back home with Owen since it was his week and he’d made a promise of not letting dumbass Carla alone with their son, yet suddenly Leo paused causing the two parents to stop walking. “I’m hungry, mama.” Here it came, sometimes when the three were together Leo tried his hardest to get them to spend time together, and with a shared look, Owen and Amelia both sighed. It wasn’t that they didn’t want to spend time together for Leo, but it was hard. Even if they couldn’t figure out why that was when everyone else clearly could ; they still loved each other, boyfriends and girlfriends and everything else aside.

“What about breakfast, huh? I’m kind of hungry too, babe,” and even though she was tired, wanted to go home and sleep, the doctor pasted on the brightest smile that she could just for her son.

“Can we makes waffles? Please, mama? Daddy doesn’t make them good.”

It hadn’t really been in her plans to go to that house, the one that she’d left all that time ago. Amelia figured that they’d eat out and she could go home. She hadn’t actually stayed for longer than a few moments when it came to drop offs but one look at Owens encouraging smile, and the brunette nodded her head. If they were gonna hang out, why not go all in, right? “I don’t see why not, since you were so brave this morning.”

It only took a moment for the little boy to grin just like Betty and tug tightly on Amelias hand toward Owens car. Instead of saying something though, like that she should probably take her own car, the brunette let him lead her only stopping for traffic before she buckled him into his carseat after Owen unlocked the door.

“Are you sure about this?” His voice rang into the chilly air, and she did her best to smile just as he had a few moments before as she nodded her head.

“Of course, what could go wrong? Now unlock my door before I freeze my ass off.”

————————————

Frankly, more could go wrong than Amelia’d originally thought because on the way back to what Amelia had once called her very own dream house, Leo passed out in the backseat, giving into the stress from the morning and refusing to wake up when they’d brought him inside. Amelia didn’t want to leave right away either because that would involve waking him up to get him in the car again and so here they were, staring at each other from opposite sides of the couch, the silence causing Amelia’s ears to ring before she opened her mouth to break it.

“Where’s Carla?”

“Uh, maybe at her place, I’m not really sure.. we got in a fight this morning after the whole park thing. You were right, she was on her phone.. I’m not even sure why she wanted to take him in the first place.”

Amelia’s jaw set and then she unclenched a moment later. She couldn’t be mad at Owen, especially if he was pissed off too, but she couldn’t help the fact that she was frustrated nonetheless. “She wanted to impress you, probably. I mean, who wouldn’t? You’re a great man.. She just didn’t realize what kind of challenge she was taking on.” Sure, Amelia was mad, but there had to be something good about the blonde bombshell if Owen liked her, right?

“She just doesn’t pay attention to him ever, the other day I went to get his jacket so that he could go outside. I was gone for maybe a minute tops and she let him go out with no socks, shoes or jacket.” He took a breath and examined the brunette across from him for a moment, the way her eyes rolled, and then settled because she was trying not to say anything too terrible about the woman who took up the other half of his bed on a good day. “Maybe you were right in saying she’s spacey.” It took him a minute and then he gave her the gentlest of smiles because she looked exhausted, almost as tired as Leo had earlier that morning with tears streaming down his face as he clutched his arm. “You should rest, Mia..”

“I said she was a dumb bitch, there’s a difference..” the brunette corrected teasingly. Eyes met his, and Amelia couldn’t help but nod. She was tired, and she’d felt kind of off for the past couple like she was coming down with something. “Hmm, maybe just for a minute and then I’ll get up and make Leo his waffles,” without even thinking about it, Amelia moved closer to her ex, tugging the blanket off the back of the couch as she did. Head resting on his shoulder, Amelia covered herself as her eyes closed.

“ ’s this okay?”

Maybe it wasn’t the best choice to snuggle with your ex who had a girlfriend well your son was sleeping off his pain, in his room but she wasn’t all there or at least that’s what she’d blame it on if she was questioned.

“It’s okay,” and really it was more okay than she’d ever know. Pressing the gentlest of kisses to the top of her head, Owen wrapped his around her without even thinking. They were all three tired, at least that’s what he’d tell himself if anyone caught them like this.

And much to his dismay someone would.

#permanentdecember #omelia #omeliafics #amelia shepherd #owen hunt

36 notes · View notes

jamesvbeircheart · 5 years

Text

&&. word has it ( james beircheart ) was just spotted around the city. ( he ) is a ( 34 ) year old affiliated with ( no one ). it’s been said that ( he ) resembles ( aidan turner ). ( he ) has been said to be ( loyal & quick-witted ) but also quite ( passionate & biased ). ( he ) is currently serving as ( a personal bodyguard ).

— ❝ i am longing to be with you, and by the sea, where we can talk together freely and build our castles in the air.❞

( hi there, kiwi here! this is the official intro for my sarcastic (and brooding) little shit, james beircheart. i’m excited to play him in this group and want all of the connections for him! please let me know if you’d like to plot; i’m available through both the group’s discord and tumblr ims. ♡ )

name: james anrai beircheart

birthplace: dublin, ireland

birthday: december 23rd | thirty-four | capricorn

scent: cinnamon and vanilla

appearance: 6′2″ with a tall, lean, and honed physique from years of training as a bodyguard. james makes sure his body is in tip top fit shape at all times to better assist in his job as the golightly’s hired guard for their little heiress, bunny. when he’s not dressed in the dress clothes of his job as a hired guard, james often favors t-shirts, jeans, and jackets. he has naturally curly hair that can get unruly if he lets it grow out and he prefers to keep a full beard.

personality: loyal, quick-witted, passionate, biased, brooding, thoughtful, caring.

biography: james was born in the heart of dublin, ireland, to a young woman on the brink of poverty. she attempted to care for james to the best of her ability, but found that she simply couldn’t afford the expenses of a child and knew, in her heart of hearts, that he would be much better off with people who could love and care for him properly. so it came to be that james was dropped off at a local orphanage with little more than a small picture of his mother holding him and his name scrawled across the back along with his birth date. james came to be cared for by the elderly nuns and caretakers who ran the organization. eventually, he was fostered out and adopted by an elderly couple who had never been able to conceive a child of their own.

conan and biddy doherty were gentle and kind, though they led the simple lives of two common people just above the poverty line. james grew up poor, but not without love in his home; he grew to care for conan and biddy the way he would pseudo-parents, though he often wondered about the woman who had left her picture in his swaddling and the life she must have led before giving him up.

by the time james was fifteen years old, conan and biddy had reached years of frailty. conan had already been in an assisted living institution for a couple of years when biddy ended up catching a bad bout of pneumonia when she’d gone out to the store to collect materials to make james a surprise boysenberry pie for his birthday. biddy passed not long after in the hospital, and with conan in a retirement home and unable to care for himself, james became the problem of the republic of ireland once more. by this time, james began to act out; he was unhappy with his life, upset that the closest thing to parents he’d ever known were both gone, and frustrated that he was stuck in a position where he was too old to be adopted but too young to be out on his own.

james took to fighting; street fighting, cage fighting, whatever he could get his hands on. he’d never particularly cared about school or university, and with the spiraling of his life after biddy’s death, he felt he had nowhere and nothing to turn to. he channeled his energy and anger out in the ring; he became skilled, but self-destructive. his face became peppered with scars, and one night, when he pissed off a small gang by beating their champion, he had his life threatened at the hands of local gangsters. a knife to the face, and james quickly became adorned with a scar that cut across his left eyebrow and down across his eye and cheek. his vision and eyes survived the abuse, but the scar remains, even to this day.

after conan passed away in the nursing home just shy of james’ nineteenth birthday, he tried to seek out his birth mother--but the orphanage could give him no insight into her whereabouts. they knew as little of her as he did, though one of them had heard rumors that she might have married and headed to america. so james gathered his belongings and set sail for north america, to the states and their loud and boisterous energy. he didn’t find his mother after landing in new york city, but he did find something that changed his life forever: howard golightly.

howard golightly was a wealthy businessman who became moved by james’ story of trying to locate his birth mother, due to the young child he had recently fostered for himself. a young girl named bunny who was in desperate need of someone to care for and look after her in ways that her adoptive parents simply wouldn’t be able to. so james, with his experience in fighting and defense, soon became the personal bodyguard to the golightly heiress: bunny golightly. he has been a constant in her life since childhood, and the two have grown increasingly inseparable as she’s grown up.

now, as the heiress reaches nineteen years old, james fears that bunny won’t need him much longer. she’ll always need a bodyguard and security, but she’s an adult now; she’s grown up into her own, an elegant, kind, and thoughtful young woman, and james...has no idea where that leaves him in her life.

#tdrintro #lone wolf: ( bio )

6 notes · View notes

twobananasforaharry · 6 years

Text

It takes a bit more than you.

I’m sat in front of my vanity feeling vain. I feel vain for even trying to get the approval of strangers. I feel vain for covering my face in gunk while my so-called boyfriend pretends I don’t actually exist.

“Did you hear me? How long is it going to take you to be ready, Y/N?” I looked back to my face as I put blush on my other cheek. Slow brush strokes just to distract me from the present.

“I’m talking to you.” I rolled my eye.

“I’ll be ready when I’m ready. You can leave it you want.” I spat back at his question.

“What’s your problem now?” I rolled my eyes and said nothing. Not today, Satan. “If you have an attitude, then you can stay.” I dropped the brush on the vanity. If you want me to stay, then fine. Go.

“Then I won’t go. Have fun without me.”

I got up and pushed past him. My feet is moving faster than my brain as I made my way through our room and into our shared walk-in closet. I reached for the zipper and pulled as hard as I could to get it to move. The heard the fabric slightly rip as the dress slid off. As I reached for a t-shirt a large hand grabbed the back of my arm.

“You’re coming with me.” I shook my head.

“I was uninvited a minute ago.”

“Dammit, Y/N! I’m not in the mood for your crap right now There are things bigger than you. We need to go.”

“Absolutely not! You’ve been so cold to me lately. You’ve been mean to me. You’ve gone on proper dates with super models and thought you wouldn’t get caught. Then you lie to my face when I show you proof. You’ve been piss drunk almost every night. When I try to talk to you, you tell me to ‘fuck off’. You won’t even let me touch you. Those are my problem! To be honest, I don’t owe you this night or any night after the way you’ve been acting.”

For weeks I’ve kept my mouth shut. I figured it was just a phase. Maybe he’s having a tough time and doesn’t know how to handle it. Then I figured he was getting over me and I should just prepare myself for the worst. Who goes on dates with models and think it’s okay when they’re in a relationship?

“I’m sorry. Happy?” I pulled out of his light grip and put on my t-shirt. “You always wear my t-shirts. Beside you need to put that dress on. We have to go.”

I laugh at his comments. I can’t believe that he thinks he did nothing wrong. It seems today he is comedy gold.

“No, I am not happy. I’m going to wear this t-shirt and lounge. You’re going by yourself. Besides I ruined the dress anyways.” He lifted the dress in his hands and held it in the light. He searched the dress until he saw the tear. It was bigger than I thought.

“That was expensive. Why would you do such a thing?” I almost felt bad about the dress. I won’t let him turn the tables on me now. Still I said nothing.

“It was an accident. The zipper was stuck. When I finally got it to move, it tore.” I sighed. If he doesn’t want this, then I shouldn’t have to fight him. If he doesn’t care, then neither do I. I’m not going to drag him. I won’t start a war. I’ll just give him what he wants.

“There’s another dress fit for the occasion. You haven’t worn it yet. It still has its tags. Try that one on.” I shook my head. He doesn’t get it.

“Harry, I don’t have the energy to pretend anymore. I love you, but I’m not sure if you even feel the same way. There’s been a cold front in our relationship for weeks. I don’t like the winter. I like sweater weather and cuddles. You have been none of that. You’re constantly going on dates with different women. You keep shutting me out. I will not be the woman you play. I’m not that December girl you’re used to having. It’s been two years. You can give me the courtesy of breaking up with me or I you, but you will not dismiss me and my feeling.

“Tonight isn’t about you or me. It won’t make a difference if we go. I am not going at all. I can’t lie anymore.”

Harry stood silently in front of me. He searches my face with his eyes. His hand cupped my cheek and my eyes instinctively close. His hands are soft.

“Y/N, those women weren’t my dates. Those were my business deals. We were discussing future campaigns. I didn’t tell you because I wasn’t sure about any of them. I finally got one that means something to me. It’s for Gucci.” My eye widened at the revelation before me.

“Gucci? Wh- Th- I-I Can’t believe it. Congratulations.” A small smile appeared on his face.

“You don’t really seem that happy for me.” I shrugged. What can I say?

“I am happy for you. I know how much you love the brand. Working hard to get these campaigns for brands that you love doesn’t make up for how you’ve been treating me. I’m sure that most of those ‘dates’ weren’t all business. Even if you were hanging out with friends, it’s something you should tell me. You’re the one who gets all territorial when I hang out with people from work who doesn’t have a female anatomy. Remember Jason? You wanted to bash his face in because Jason, my other co-workers, and I went out for drinks. You didn’t see them at first and you were ready to punch his face in. How do you think I feel?”

His head fell at the same time a look of guilt painted his face. His arms engulfed me. As if on cue, I melted into his arms. I missed him.

“I’m so so sorry, Y/N. I don’t have an excuse for being cold. I didn’t mean to. I got caught up in myself and making money. I forgot to take a step back and see what’s really important. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. In fact, you have every right to tell me to ‘fuck off’, but if you don’t and you’re willing to give me a second chance, I will make it up to you. Just don’t leave me.” Harry looked at me with those green orbs and I felt like crying, but it won’t solve our issues.

“I never want to leave you, Harry. This was me telling you to get your shit together. From weeks ago to five minutes ago, that Harry needs to go. I’m all for your hypersexual dominant needs, but I will not take your crap outside of the bedroom.” He nodded understanding that I am putting my foot down. Enough is enough.

“Does this mean you will go with me to this event?” My brow shot up.

“No. I’m still not going. I’m going to take that dress to get repaired tomorrow. As for now, I’ll send my love through the television set.”

“But-” I stuck my hand up to stop him from continuing.

“I’ll be here you when you get back. You have a lot of making up to do.”

Harry left without. While on the red carpet, interviewers kept asking where I was. He told them that I am under the weather and I’m rooting for him in front of the television. When Harry returned, we made love a countless amount of times. He whispered sweet nothings in my ears and promised to do better. Months passed before we decided to call it quits. We began fighting all the time. Once when he was drunk, he said, “It’s not my fault that I fucked everybody here.” When he was sober, I asked him about it. He didn’t bother to deny it anymore. I love him. I’ll always love him, but he needs time to be alone and from this I will grow.

#harry #Harry Styles #harry edward styles #One Shot #Harry Styles imagine #imagine #imagines #Harry Styles imagines #Harry Styles One shot #Liam Payne #Louis Tomlinson #Zayn Malik #Niall Horan #Harry One Shot #Harry Imagine #Niall #Liam #Louis #Zayn

143 notes · View notes

beuteenet · 3 years

Text

New Trend Products BEUTEE On 29/09/2021

I’m A Warrior Of God The Lord Jesus Is My Commanding Officer The Holy Bible Is My Code Of Conduct Shirt, hoodie

Checklist Before Leaving Home Keys Wallet Cell Phone Knife Shirt, hoodie

I’m A Librarian Nothing Scares Me Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Librarian My Halloween Is All Booked Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Xmas Dog Paw shirt, hoodie

Pumpkin Dog Paws Shirt, hoodie

Baseball Dad Some People Have To Wait Their Entire Lives Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Vietnam Veteran 1954 1975 Don’t Thank Me Thank My 58220 Brothers And Sisters Who Never Came Back Shirt, hoodie

I Checked My Receipt And I Didn’t Buy Any Of Your Bullshit Shirt

I Identify As A Pissed Off American Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Become So Free That Your Very Existence Is An Act Of Rebellion – Camus Shirt, hoodie

Create George Orwell In Fiction Again Shirt

My Rights Don’t End Where Your Fears Begin Canada Flag Shirt, hoodie

Freedom Doesn’t Come From Taking A Needle It Comes From Fighting The Tyranny Shirt, hoodie

Covid 1984 Shirt, hoodie

They Can’t Arrest Us All Shirt

Make Orwell Fiction Again Shirt, hoodie

It Is Not Covid-19 That Is Preventing The Return Of Normal Life It’s The Government Shirt, hoodie

I Need New Conspiracy Theories Because All Of My Old Ones Came True Shirt, hoodie

Lubricated With Liberal Tears shirt, hoodie

Tyranny Needs Constant Resistance You Cannot Comply Your Way Out Of It Shirt, hoodie

I Will Not Censor Myself To Comfort Your Ignorance Shirt, hoodie

You Cannot Comply Your Way Out Of Tyranny Canada Flag Shirt, hoodie

My Rights Don’t End Where Your Fears Begin Australia Flag Shirt

You Cannot Comply Your Way Out Of Tyranny Shirt, hoodie

Shut Up Stop Thinking Do As We Say Media Hypnosis Shirt, hoodie

Work Harder Millions On Welfare Depend On You Shirt, hoodie

I Am Anti Socialist Shirt

Funny Defund The Politicians Shirt

Facts Don’t Care About Your Feelings Shirt

I Don’t Always Scream At My Tv But When I Do It’s Bills Season Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I May Be Crazy But Crazy Is Better Than Stupid Funny Cat Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Unicorn Not My Monkeys Not My Circus But The Clowns Definitely Know Me Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Wrigley Field Home Of The World’s Largest Gay Bar Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I Voted For Trump Who Gave Up His Wealth For My Country Shirt, hoodie

Govern Me Harder Daddy Shirt, hoodie

Statism Ideas That Are Mandatory Just Because They Are Good Enough Shirt, hoodie

The Media Is The Virus Essential Shirt, hoodie

You Just Cannot Force Your Way Out Of Tyranny Shirt, hoodie

Think While It’s Legal Shirt

Nana Witch Like A Normal Nana Only More Magical Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Gigi Witch Like A Normal Gigi Only More Magical Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Why Yes I Actually Do Need All These Books Shirt, hoodie

Never Underestimate An Old Lady Who Loves Reading Book Owl Shirt, hoodie

Owl I’m Not Addicted To Reading I Can Stop As Soon As I Finish The Next Chapter Shirt, hoodie

Mind Your Own Uterus Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I Fully Intend To Haunt People When I Die I Have A List Skeleton shirt, hoodie, tank top

I’m A Simple Woman Jesus Dog Coffee And Sewing Shirt

Helicopter Pilots Get It Up Faster Shirt, hoodie

Once An Emt Always An Emt It’s Like Mafia You Know Too Much Shirt

Mother Of Chickens Shirt

Dandelion Chickens Shirt

I Don’t Care What People Think Of Me Except Cows Shirt

Biden Blood On His Hands Shirt, hoodie

Librarian It’s Good To Be Bookish Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I Used To Be Cool Now I’m Just My Dogs Snack Dealer Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Taxation Is Theft Shirt

Someday I Will Be An Old Lady With House Full Of Books Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Hot Cocoa Scary Movies Pumpkin Spice Flannels Murder Shirt

Mimi Witch Like A Normal Mimi Only More Magical Shirt, hoodie, tank top

To My Wife I Didn’t Marry You So I Could Live With You Ove You Your Husband Fleece Blanket

Simple Man T For Texas Sweet Home Alabama Four Walls Canvas

When I Simply Say I Miss Him I Really Mean My Soulmate Canvas

Personalized Photo And Name Couple God Knew My Heart Needed You Canvas

I Ride Motorcycles I Drink And I Know Things Vintage Poster

I Will Not Comply Shirt

Traitor Joe’s Army Surplus Shirt

Cat Leaf Fall Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dear Karma I Have A List Of People You Missed Cat Shirt, hoodie, tank top

On A Dark Desert Highway Cool Wind In My Hair Witch Shirt, hoodie

10 Things I Want In Life Shirt, hoodie

Hentai Peaches Shirt

Forget Me Not Alzheimer Awareness Flower 3d Phone Case

Cat Lovers And Weirdos Welcome Mug

My Sewing Room Rules Poster

I Fully Intend To Haunt People When I Die I Have A List Black Cat Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Witch I Am Going To Let Karma Fix It Because If I Fix It I’m Going To Jail Halloween Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Books Things I Do In My Spare Time Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Guitars Oh Give Me The Beat And Free My Soul Shirt, hooide, tank top

Make In 1976 December 45 Years Of Being Awesome Flower Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Movie Character Shirt

I Not Just A Daddy’s Little Girl I’m A Veterans Daughter Shirt

Damn Right I Am A Packers Fan Now And Forever Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dispatcher Unstoppable Together, hoodie

I Am A Nurse Of Course I’m Crazy Do You Think A Sane Person Would Do This Job Shirt

Guns Don’t Kill People Biden Does American Flag Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Biden Can Make America Great Again If He Left America Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I’m Ok Garden Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Girl Covered By The Blood Of Jesus Born November Shirt, hoodie, tank top

He Thought With His Willy And Wound Up In My Chili Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I’m The Grammy Witch It’s Like A Normal Grandma But More Magical Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Single Stress Is Now Gone. Life’s Easier Shirt, hoodie

The Most Dangerous Virus Is Media Shirt

Make In December 1965 56 Years Of Being Awesome Sunflowers Shirt

Shark Halloween Costume Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dentist Save Teeth Phone Case

Pilot Mobile Case- Cockpit Indicators Phone Case

Librarian I Like Big Books And I Cannot Lie Poster

Librarian I Am A Reader That Means I Live In A Crazy Fantasy World With Unrealistic Expectations Poster

Librarian Are You Reading Are You Writing Sunflowers Poster

Librarian Between The Pages Of A Book Is A Lovely Place To Be Poster

Librarian Books The Smell The Feel The Words The Weight Poster

Librarian Everyday Hero Poster

Marvel Studio Movie Characters Poster

Stitch I Did Not Trip The Floor Looked Sad So I Gave It A Hugs Shirt, hoodie, tank top

The Browns 75th Anniversary Shirt, hoodie, tank top

March 1959 Limited Edition 63 Years Of Being Awesome Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Witch I Do No Harm But Take No Shit In Your Box Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Drunkle Sclerosis May Be Drunk May Have Ms Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Afghanistan Veteran 2001 2021 Don’t Thank Me Shirt, hoodie

I Was Just Sick In Your Handbag You Are Welcome Cat Mug

I Don’t Live In Finland But Finland Will Always Live In Me Mug

All I Want Is For My Dad In Heaven To Know How Much I Love And Miss Him Mug

Snoopy Happy Everything Holiday Mug

The Exorcists Ghostbusters Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dispatcher Strong Alone Unstoppable Together shirt

Under Armour Hunting shirt, hoodie

Denver Broncos The Beatles Abbey Road Walk Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Life Is Full Of Important Choices Dental Hygienist Shirt, hoodie, tank top

February 1961 Limited Edition 61 Years Of Being Awesome Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Witch I Am Going To Let Karma Fix It Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Owl I’m Sorry I’d Love To Be There But This Book Is Not Going To Read Itself Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dear Karma I Have A List Of The People You Missed Cat Shirt, hoodie, tank top

37 Years 1985 2021 The Goonies Thank You For The Memories Shirt, hoodie, tank top

I Identify As Vaccinated Shirt

Being A Grandma Doesn’t Make Me Old It Makes Me Blessed Shirt

Tom Waits Playing Guitar Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Cute Halloween Zombies Running With Pumpkin Shirt

Cute Cat Sleeping Like An Angel Shirt

57th Birthday November 1963 Limited Edition Shirt, hoodie, tank top

My Gun Is Not A Threat Unless You Are Shirt

57th Birthday October 1964 Limited Edition Shirt, hoodie

It’s Ok If Only Thing You Do Today Is Breathe Suicide Prevention Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Cat Witch You Couldn’t Handle Me Even If I Came With Instructions Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Melanin Family Shirt, hoodie, tank top

My Perfect Day Wake Up Read Books Eat Breakfast Shirt, hoodie

I Am Retired Reading Books Is My Job Shirt, hoodie

This Woman Will Never Own Enough Books And Yarn Shirt, hoodie

Skoden Native American Indian Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dale Earnhardt 20 Years 7x Nascar Cup Series Champion Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Dachshund Pumpkin Halloween Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Sharks Halloween Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Golden Retriever Kisses Fix Everything Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Vaccinated My Body My Choice Shirt

Unicorns My Big Butt Came In Handy This Year Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Damn Right I Am A Broncos Fan Now And Forever Shirt, hoodie, tank top

My Son Is My Guardian Angel He Watches Over My Back Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Missing You Always The Day God Took You Home Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Plan For Today Coffee Boat Beer Sex Shirt

The Spirit Of The Warrior Is Found In The Men Who Bleed Red And Black Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Senior Mom Class Of 2022 I’m Not Crying Shirt

Senior Dad Class Of 2022 Shirt, hoodie, tank top

Class Of 2022 Pandemic Survivors Shirt, hoodie

Senior Class Of 2022 Always Keep Your Face To The Sun Shirt, hoodie

Home Page: BEUTEE

The article New Trend Products BEUTEE On 29/09/2021 appeared first on Beutee.

from Beutee https://ift.tt/3m6qujz via https://beutee.net

#beutee beuteenet sweater socks tumbler shoe tanktop longsleeve

1 note · View note

fabrilyshop · 4 years

Text

List product on Wednesday, December 2, 2020

Assets Over Liabilities T-Shirt

Whale Mountain Biking Vintage Retro T Shirt

Don't Piss Me Off I Will Stop Taking My Pills Funny T-Shirt

Once Upon A Time There Was A Girl Who Really Wanted To Be A Paleontologist It Was Me T-Shirt

Big Face Coffee Owner T Shirt

Phil For President Nice Guy Tries Hard Love The Game T Shirt

2020 Toilet Paper Hello 24 Quarantined T Shirt

A Woman Her Paw Dog And Her Air Force Vintage Retro T-Shirt

#List #product #on #Wednesday #December #2 #2020

0 notes

kentstartt · 7 years

Text

jack and deans 2017

heres a masterpost of everything (i think) jack and dean did in 2017, everything is linked if you so wish to see them also the dates might be a day off bc im in Australia and i cba getting the timezone correct. follow me on twitter @jackhowad for me and @jackandean for updates x (this took me like 3 days to put together id really appreciate if u read it xo

January

6th- deans 25th birthday

8th- they uploaded ‘the good the bad and the just plain sh!t parts of 2016′

13th- dean and his brother daniel went to a Nintendo switch event in london (x,x,x)

16th- deans ass is now available on vinyl & dean followed me on jack and dean updates

27th jack saw moonlight and mark hamill liked his tweet

28th jack and hazel saw the lego batman movie

30th hazel uploaded “a lovely night” cover with jack

February

9th the trailer for drunk history, which jack and dean were in, was posted (x)

10th they posted a photo revealing raleigh richie was going to be in jadoat & dean was on bbc radio 1 talking about games

11th jacks 25th birthday

12th dean did a twitch stream (the only clip i have from that is him saying he wants to fuck tom hardy so, enjoy) & jack and hazel went to the baftas (x,x,x)

13th superglued was the first jack and dean video to hit 2 million views & dean first drew the heart guy

15th bertie took some nice photos of dean (x,x,x,x)

19th dodie posted a cover of ‘someone in the crowd’ with jack and co

20th dean wants to eat ass?

21st they had a screening of jadoat season 2 for cast, crew and friends (x,x,x)

22nd dean posted the first designs for what would become his merch

23rd cayleigh posted the 120 chicken nuggets challenge with dean

27th dean posted the first “We Need To Talk About Games” podcast with bertie

March

1st the poster for jadoat season 2 was posted

3rd dean got his nintendo switch and died a bit inside

6th dean posted the second episode of the “We Need To Talk About Games” podcast with his brother daniel

9th the jadoat tralier was posted on youtube

10th jack went to stay in a cabin in the woods with hazel for the weekend

14th jack posted a vlog “naked man at the gym”

16th jadoat season 2 went online along with season 1 being posted in full on fulscreens facebook page

18th jack and dean (and co) went to dodies gig in london

21st jack posted a vlog “dont talk about it”

23rd episode 3 of jadoat went on fullscreen

26th dean finished playing zelda breath of the wild

27th jack and dean posted a #spon sketch “living room shootout” ft bertie and hazel

29th jack and dean were on hannah wittons fubar radio show (x,x)

30th the 4th episode of jadoat went on fullscreen & they were on the greg james show on radio 1

31st dean posted a vlog “Dean Updates You”

April

1st jack posted a vlog “my bad acne”

6th jack posted a vlog “hasnt seen the matrix" & dean posted the first dean draws ‘Dean Draws A Slime Ghoul’

7th jack and dean went to vidconEU in Amsterdam (x,x,x)

12th jack and dean did an interview with maximum pop

13th jack posted a vlog “movie directing secrets with gareth edwards”

14th dean did the photoshoot for his new merch store

15th dean posted “Dean Draws Space Elephant POTUS”

21st jack and dean posted jadoat S1E3 to youtube as “babysitters”

22nd dean posted ‘Dean Draws A Top Hat Mermaid’ & jack posted a vlog “things go wrong”

25th dean started his patreon back up again (go donate) & jack met james gunn (the director of gotg2)

26th their episode of drunk history aired & jack posted a vlog “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - Thoughts/Review”

28th dean posted “Dean Draws A Candle Samurai Shark”

May

3rd jack hosted a roundtable thing with Ridley Scott and Michael Fassbender & he met billy crudup & katherine waterson

5th dean flew to playlist live in florida

6th jack posted a vlog “whos the best chris” with hazel

7th daniel j layton posted “baking with layton also jack howard” & dean did a m&g at playlist live

8th jack and dean were on cbbc to play “say what”

9th jack was on an episode of reasonable beef to talk about guardians of the galaxy

10th jack posted a vlog “theres NOT hope for us all”

17th dean posted “Dean Draws Jack Howard Cthulhu” & jack was on another ep of reasonable beef to talk about spiderman 3

20th deandobbsstore launched

21st jack posted a vlog “if wonder woman fails”

24th dean posted “Dean Talks #1 - Merch, Patreon, Jack & Dean and the next Dean Draws”

27th dean posted “dean draws a broccoli dinosaur”

28th jack and dean posted a sketch “bed head”

29th jack posted the bts/bloopers of bed head to twitter

June

3rd jack posted a vlog “bad brain days”

16th dean drew this adorable pic of him and jack

17th jack and hazel saw hans zimmer in concert

18th hazel posted “talking pictures” with jack

21st jack and dean flew to LA for vidconUS

23rd jack and dean attended viconUS in Anaheim

25th jack and dean hosted part of the vidcon livestream (x)

27th dean got his jacket embroidered with DAD (his initials)

28th jack and dean officially became real youtubers when they were on “youtubers react to the nicki minaj challenge”

30th jack and dean posted a sketch “nazi bar” (which got trending and pissed off all the alt right piss babies)

July

1st dom fera posted a sketch “banana shirt” with jack

4th nazi bar was featured in philip defracos “today in awesome”

7th jack saw spider-man homecoming

13th jack and dean (& co) attended the dunkirk premiere (x) and jack met tom hardy

14th jack and dean were on another episode of youtubers react “Try To Watch This Without Laughing or Grinning” & nazi bar hit one million views so jack posted the deleted scenes to twitter

15th jack posted a vlog “wonder woman review” & was on another reasonable beef to talk about spider-man homecoming

16th jack posted a vlog “spider-man homecoming review”

17th jack posted a vlog “i love Christopher Nolan”

August

2nd jack and dean were in “youtubers react to 90s internet comercials”

4th dean attended sitc on his own for the first time ever

7th the fratocrats posted “Jack Howard, Muggles Vs Wizards and Roy!“

10th dean drew theresa may babbadook for a dean draws but the file for corrupted

11th wetheunicorns posted “dean dabbs”

14th jack announced that there wont be a jadoat season 3 :( (x)

17th dodie posted “in the middle (acoustic)” with jack

27th jack and dean posted a sketch “handful”

29th jack posted the outtakes to handful on twitter

31st jack and hazel went to ireland

September

7th jack attended the premiere of “Mother” (x)

8th deans week long gaming IG project started (x,x,x) & jack met Jennifer Lawrence and Darren Aronofsky in paris with hazel

15th dean posted "Dean Draws A Mystery Movie Poster - Cineworld Spon”

23rd jack posted a vlog ‘a chat with matthew vaughn’

24th jack posted a vlog “Kingsman: The Golden Circle - RANT & Review”

26th jack and hazel celebrated their 2 year anniversary

27th jack was on reasonable beef to talk about kingsman: the golden circle

28th jack was in a video on school of life “Why we should show our hurt rather than argue” & jack and dean flew to toronto for buffer festival

29th jack was on the jackmaate podcast

October

1st jack and dean posted a sketch “self conscious computer ft anna akana” after screening it at buffer fest

3rd jack posted a vlog “why do we binge” & timH posted a sketch “we’ve all been there” with jack and dom fera

11th josh edwards posted “game show” with jack and dean

16th dean did a photoshoot for season 2 of his merch

19th dean attended an event for mario oddyssey (x)

27th deandobbsstore launced season 2 with chill one hoodies and eat people beanies & dodie posted the official video for ‘you’ with jack and sav

28th dean attended MCM comic con in london

31st josh edwards posted “houndz of the BASTARDvilles“ with jack, hazel, dan and dodie

November

3rd jack went on the orient express

5th dean posted “dean draws chill one (a really bad how to)”

14th jack did some baking as promo for daddys home (i think)

16th jack posted a vlog “the problem with marvel”

17th hazel posted “would you rather” with jack

28th they shot a new video

30th dean was on radio 1 talking about games

December

3rd jack and dean posted a sketch “cup phones”

idk if anyone will actually read this far, thanks if u do. also congrats to the lads who have had a p sick year, i’ve had a great time updating it. also s/o to felicity who proofread this for me, i appreciate it, even if i didn't use any of her changes. follow her on twitter, shes whipped for taron like me but its more sexy from her

#jack howard #dean dobbs #jack and dean #pls read my thing yall

6 notes · View notes

popculturebuffet · 5 years

Text

Bloomtrospective Part 1: The Academia Waltz or Birth of an American Stinker

Once upon a time in Austin, Texas, University of Texas student Berkely Breathed, a smartass with a mustache to this very day and a loveable goofus of the highest order, was recently out of a job, thrown out on his ass by the Austin-American Statesman for one of his cartoons pissing people off. It would not be the last time one of his cartoons pissed people off, nor the end of his cartooning career, though it would probably be the last job he was outright fired from.. maybe he might of delivered pizza's, stripped or fought grown men and/or walruses for money.. I don't know what he did in his spare time.

And not long after, he found a new , regular cartooning gig in the daily texan, UT's newspaper and since college papers give far less fucks about people yelling at them than national newspapers, which gave way TOO much of a fuck about people yelling at them over comic strips, Berkely had his first regular gig. and it was this gig that lead to thousands of comic strips, 3 more series later on, plushies, an animated special, a failed pitch at dreamworks, t-shirts, bill watterson getting pissy with him, pearl clutching from concerned elderly people, letters from harper lee and lenoard nemoy, and a small album made by fans. And it all started with a small time semi-doonesbury knockoff starting an obnoxious fratboy.

Welcome one and all, to Bloomtrospective, my retrospective covering all 14 years of bloom county, and every year of it's prequel and sequels. For those not aware bloom county is a comic strip that was started by Brethed in december 1980 and went on to run till mid 89, becoming one of the most influnetal and funniest comic strips of all time, often getting into political and celebrity satire and weird shenanigans. I"m, as you can probably tell by this insane undertaking, a massive fan and more than happy to dive into all 28, yes 28, years worth of content it's creator , Mr. Brethed, put out. And before you ask, yes virginia, that is his real name. But before I can get into bloom county proper, as you can probably guess i'm tackling his college strip, the Academia Waltz.

The reason is simple: I want to track his full evolution as an artist and professinal smartass, and a lot of what would become bloom county is in the primordial ooze of this strip. That's not metaphorical either: around 41 gags, give or take one or two that are similar but not identical, were recycled for Bloom County , with a paticular gag getting recycled three times, a gag i'll get to next time as it's the very first Bloom County strip and frankly deserves a paragraph all it's own. That being said, the strips were hilarious and worth a recycle and frankly not a lot of people probably saw this strip first run, so recyling his best stuff for a wider audience is just good practice. It was done before him with Doonesbury's Gary Tredeau before him and Pearls Before Swine's Stephan Pastis after him recyling their college and web strips for syndication.

And this is far from the only way Waltz follows in Doonesbury's footsteps. For those unaware of the strip, Doonesbury is a political strip started in 1969 that's STILL GOING, albeit sunday's only since the early 2010's, and was one of the most popular and well loved strips in the world at the time Waltz came out. Brethed has out and out admitted that he curbed from the strip for Waltz and early BLoom County and implied, likely sarcastically but given Tredeau is a smartass himselff I can't be entirely sure, that Tredeau sent him obsecntiy filled letters in response. And for the record the two are now on good terms and likely were by mid-bloom county, and it's just as likely the letters were in good fun. Both series do have a main charcter, though in doonesbury's case one of many, with sunglasses and a surly conservative attitude, and several of waltz side cast resemble doonesbury characters. And Brethed wasn't blind to this, eventually poking fun at himself late into Waltz' run.

But now with that Elephant firmly out of the room, we can move onto the strip itself which starts... with a bunch of formless one off strips about random people before solidly getting into a main cast, as i'll be going character by character here. Though for starters i'll be focusing on two: Steve and Kitzi

Our main schmuck is Steve Dallas, one of the main reasons i'm covering the strip as, along with Opus, the penguin whose the main character of Berke's works as a whole and who we'll get to in an enstalment or two, is one of the few characters Brethed uses in every single strip after this and the only one to have a lead roll in all four.

Steve is an obnoxious, racist, sexist, immature, attempted cheating, asshole of a fratboy. He was based on a friend of Berke's who hasn't come out of the woodwork to beat him senseless yet. The character was intended to be a saterzation of fratboys and toxic masculinity, but sadly as happens often several fratboys saw him as a figure to be looked up to and missed the joke to Brethed's annoyance. And he works well as that and decently as a unsymapthetic protagnist, but I do also see easily why he ended up not being the main character of BLoom County itself and more one of an ensemble with Opus and Milo taking center stage: he's an asshole. It's funner watching his misadventures with someone besides his girlfriend who should've left him LONG ago and who he threatens to molest at one point...

A gag that clearly hasn't agred great, though I concede that put in context of the time it's okay and compared to some shenanigans in 70's and 80's frat comedy, it's tame by comparison. But while not terrible here Steve works at his best with a strong personality to play off of, like most of the bloom county cast, especially as a double act with Opus at times later on. Here while there is a good bit or two with his girlfriend and soriority girl Kitz, like the condom gag used up top.

There just.. isn't that much to her till the last leg of the strip. For most of it she's just a flat character who wnats more from the relationship and refuses to sleep with Steve for most of the strip because he's Steve. She DOES sleep with her professor, in an arc that is absolutley dreadful by today's standards, as she is very clearly drunk when both she calls him and comes over, and not only doe she sleep with him. But well....

Yup, this has happened before.. and look i'm not saying dark jokes can't be played for laughs, again the above molest gag really isn't that terrible in the context of the time, mostly because steve gets caught and presumibly roughed up immeditly. Here? A teacher takes advantage of his student, has done so with them before, and will again and it's portrayed as cheating rather than Kitzi you know, being raped. It's not great is what i'm saying, though I don't hold present day Brethead acountable for it and I doubt he's all that proud of it. He didn't exactly use this arc to represent the strip any time waltz was reprinted before he let it be fully reperinted and wasn't proud of the strip as a whole, it's just a strip that dosen't hold up well int he Me Too era and the character himself can go have sex with a rake.

Moving on from that nightmare, Kitzi DOES get an arc towards the end where she does change a bit, deciding, out of nowhere really, to change her look up and her major.

This verison does in fact sleep with steve, Ugh, but is also a slightly better foil for him and would later be the basis for a character we'll get to next time, Bobbi Harlow, who'd be a more fully realized verison, but still hasn't changed that much: she's a feminist sure but her role with steve is still the smart woman to the dumb traditional male, a dynamic that's been done to death by now, and even taking it in the context of the time just isn't that funny. She's mostly a cardboard cutout of a woman used to serve as Steve's foil and Bobbi after her would be a bit more fleshed out character wise. But we'll get to her next time.

Now onto another charcter, one who'd be fully imigrated, if breifly to Bloom County.

This is rabies, a dog. He'd be abandoned partway into the next strip because as Berke himself put it, there was no shortage of cartoon dogs, and his personality would largely become that of Milo and the forest animals. However for this strip.. he's great, consiently funny, well drawn and the most entertaining part. Some of the best bits with steve are playing off this old boy and here are some of his highlights.

Not much else to say really, he' a funny, dry sacracstic character and to me feels kinda like the blueprint for the vast majority of berke's characters to come.

Next up is Saigon John, though he’d be called Cutter John in Bloom County. He's one of the only two characters to be important to any of the following strips along with Steve. In Both strips he's a ladies man and vietnam vet, though here he's more of an out and out hippie. He's still remarkably fleshed out for this strip and even gets a full origin story at one point, that while starting goofy with Cutter having turned his rifle into a bong the final two strips are pogniant, and while having a good joke in there... still treat his being paralized in a warzone with the weight it deserves.

A standout in this run and a sign that berke does have a knack for emotinal beats as well as damn good comedy. He was also steve's roomie for a while... nothing really to go into there, just something I felt needed mentioning.

Finally, out of the major characters, we have Val, kitzi's roomate who ironically is never seen with her as frankly Kitzi is basically built to orbit around steve. I do like Val a lot though, an average looking young woman looking for love.. but as seen above usually just ends up trying to surivive an evening with some jerkhole. She's a sympatheic enough character and while she does show up for the finale, she dosen't really get an ending. Get used to that as Berke has a habit of dropping characters abrubtly. Speaking of which it's now time for a character lightning round. Outside of our main 5 here the strip had a TON of characters that didn't really do much and whose names I struggle to remember. There's Halfoat a crossdressing football player whose a mixed bag.

Their hard to read as it's hard to tell if their transsgender or just wear women's clothing and this being a 20 something berkely brethead a time when those sorta things were given about as much thought as the producers of Cats gave the idea of making the characters not look like a crime against .. well everything really. But at least the people with an issue against them are treated as morons and Halfoat is portrayed as confident and accepted by most of the team except for the douche above.

Fairing a little better is Threser, another football character before they dropped that gag entirely as it was basically Doonesbury's football strips but with no idea what to actually do with them besides ocasinally throw in an LBGTQ person in there and have the rest of the team be idiots about it. But Thresher is self assurred and enjoyable.

Next we have dancer, a combination of Zonker and Mark Slackmeyer from doonesbury who.. really dosen't have mcuh in the way of personality. He has an accent and that is. The british australian mismash of an accent would come up again in bloom county with LImekiller, a doonesbury ripoff for another day, but otherwise he's basically nothing.

Finally we have the WEIRDEST edition to this cast, Trooper, who appeared for 4 or 3 strips. A very transparent Zonker Harris from Doonesbury knockoff, with the odd as hell twist of "he's an alien". While BLom County would later have aliens and other weirdness from time to time, it worked because it was a hightned version of the real world, something that would be used ocasionally in waltz, but not enough yet at this point to make this any less what the hell. Just a weird footnote. But as you can tell most of these characters are also rans. THere was also a facultiy member warring against medicority, Louis berke's first POC character seen above, some guy who showed up for a while but had no reanl name or personality, Val's mother, Steve's sister and a few one shots but the strip ran through characters pretty quickly. However that does give me the lisecne to bring in the dropped character count!

Dropped Character Count: 9

9 already and with val and Kitzi both being dropped, though kitzi would be resued in a WEIRD way later on in bloom county. that already brings us up to Dropped Character Count: 11

And we've only just begun folks.But to wrap this up, the strip DID have a proper finale: with Berke’s graduation imminent, he quickly wrapped up the story with Steve casually proposing and despite the understandable issues her mother had witht he wedding, steve and kitzi were wed and the strip came to a close. Not a bad ending all things considered and as the next few strips would show, Berke had a way with endings.. for the most part.

Overall though Waltz, despite an awkward start is a decent strip.. dated sure, it was made several decades ago, but not all that bad and enjoyable enough if your a fan of Bloom County, though it's also easy enough to read once out of curosity and then never again, but i'm glad I went through it again for the Cutter John flashback and Rabies alone, and i'm equally as glad it is out there for the curious party to see where BLoom County began.

Naturally you can tell the story dosen't end here... next time Berke goes national and gets syndicated by the Washington Post as he tries to find his footing as a comic stripper and we take our first trip down to Bloom County and meet a wide variety of colorful characters.. that by year two will mostly be gone. Until next time, courage.

#bloom county #berkley brethead #comic strips #comics #the 70's #retrospective #bloomtrospective #the academia waltz #university of texas #steve dallas #rabies #dogs #penguins

0 notes

imaginemarvelbae · 7 years

Photo

Savior- Bucky Barnes Imagine Word count: 1522 Warnings:fighting, physical injuries and swearing. A/N: I’m still without my computer so I’m writing from my phone. Send your request and check the prompt list! James Buchanan Barnes, also known as Bucky Barnes or maybe you know him as the Winter Soldier. I first met him in Washington, he was about to shot Steve Rogers, my best friend and my only family in the entire world. Steve was knocked out on the ground and I stepped between his body and the super soldier. He looked me with his eyes filled with rage and hate. He had beautiful eyes. He was pointing at me with his gun. “Wait! He’s your friend, Steve Rogers. You’ve known him since you were a child. You are James Barnes, he calls you Bucky. Please don’t hurt my friend, he’s everything I’ve got left” I begged him mercy, he ran away furious. That was the last time I saw him, two years ago. Then Sharon texted me an address. I showed it to Steve and his face glowed. It was the most likely place where we could find his bestie. It was a building. We entered in an apartment, very organized. It was a book over the fridge and Steve took it, I turned around and almost had a heart attack. It was Bucky looking at us in silence, he had a red t-shirt that made him look pretty handsome. I was about to draw my gun but my partner stopped me. "Do you remember us?” He spoke quietly. "You’re Steve, I read about you in a museum. I don’t know who she is, she stopped me from killing you” he said without any possible feeling. “She’s agent Y/N Y/L/N. You can trust her. We need to leave now, people are coming to take you but they’re not thinking in taking you alive. I know you’re nervous. Nobody has to get hurt” Steve was so kind but strict at the same time, no wonder why he is captain. “It doesn’t have to end in a fight Sargent Barnes” I said looking at his deep eyes. "It always ends in a fight” he said taking off his gloves and that revealed the cold silver metal underneath. A grenade came from outside the window, Bucky kicked it and Steve covered it with his shield. A man came from the window and grabbed me from behind, I managed to punch him in the right places and he fell down on the ground. Someone shot at Buck but he shield himself with his vibranium arm, one bullet bounced off and ended up in my arm. I cried in pain and Bucky looked at me worried. "We need to get out of here. Now!” I kicked the damn door and a few german agents flew with it. It was so many agents to me, Bucky and Steve followed me and helped. I shot at some but Steve didn’t want anyone to get hurt. Bucky was irrational, he was trying to survive without thinking of the costs. He threw a man and almost die from the fall but Steve caught him right on time. “Cmon man!” He yelled at his friend. I was laughing. Buck kicked a door and threw himself outside the window. I watched him from the window and saw a big black cat jumping from the roof. The cat was actually a man in a costume. Another vigilante, I thought. I jumped trying to stop him from killing James. The man in the black cat suit was fighting Bucky. I shot at him but nothing happened. Vibranium. It was the only way. Nat gave me a thing that was like a small grenade that sticked to your body and gave you enough electricity to be down for two minutes. I threw it at the man and he fell down. I grabbed Bucky by his metal arm and ran with him. He let go of me, of course. Man from the 40s, would never let a woman have the control of the situation. I saw a big fall from the roof we were to the floor, he noticed I was a little big scared so he took me in his arms and jumped. We arrived safely and kept running. Bucky grabbed a motorcycle and I jumped with him to get in it. I don’t know how but the cat suit guy made us jump off the motorcycle, we were surrounded. Steve, Sam, Bucky, this crazy ass guy and me were pointed at with like 200 guns. War Machine, aka Rhodes, arrived and called us criminals. The man in the suit took off his helmet and showed himself, he was prince T'Challa, from Wakanda. He was staring at me, with a disappointed look. “Your highness” Rhodes said. We were taken to the Joint Counter Terrorism Center, where Everett K. Ross was waiting for us. He was like the boss of everyone, including my dear friend Sharon Carter. I was the only handcuffed, Steve was sitting next to me worried as hell. His best friend was accused of murder and he couldn't do anything about it. Sam was arguing with Sharon about his bird suit. I was lost in my thoughts when secretary Ross spoke directly to me. "Any questions miss Y/N?" He inquired. "Why am I only one handcuffed?" I raised my wrists in order to show my question. "You hurt the new king of Wakanda with an electric device. That makes you dangerous" I was pissed. "Really? Dangerous? Steve is a super soldier that survived for like 100 years. Sam is a ex soldier with wings and hurt the king T'Challa as well" Tony rolled his eyes. "Oh god Ross. Remove her handcuffs please. She will be hours complaining. Oh look the interrogatory started" A guard removed my handcuffs and I could see the interrogatory room from a screen. He was sitting in the most awful chair ever. It was like a cell. I was feeling super sad for him, everything he had gone through and there was people trying to screw him up. Suddenly the power went out. I panicked, Sharon whispered to me where he was. Sam, Steve and I ran to his rescue. The golden trio. I walked into a destroyed room. The interrogator was lying on the floor. There was no sign of Bucky so far. He came out of the blue and grabbed me by my neck and pulled me up the wall. He was not letting me breathe. I looked for mercy in his eyes but it was pointless. I looked around and saw a red book with a black star on the floor. He was brainwashed again by this dude. Steve broke a piece of concrete in his back. He let go of me and I could breathe again. Sam was talking to this mysterious guy while our frozen friends left the room fighting. Sam was angry at this guy. I stood up next to him. "What did you do to him?! Why?! ANSWER ME DAMN IT" I was furious, Sam knew it and stepped back. "Mission report, December 16th, 1991" he gave me a quick smirk. Oh he was so screwed. I punched him in the face so hard I knocked him out. Sam was impressed and we left to follow our winter pal. Steve had fallen down the elevator so Sam went to help him and I chased Winter. He was fighting everyone but no one seemed to win the fight against Bucky, not even Tony, Natasha, agent 13 or even T'Challa. He was going upstairs but I stopped him. "Bucky, you know me. You can trust me. Remember. Remember your life, remember Steve, your days in the army. Sargent Barnes, James. Just-" I think he enjoyed the fact of choking me. He lifted me up from the ground. His eyes were lost, he didn't feel anything. He was lost. I just wanted to save him. He punched me in the face and everything went black. I felt like falling without fear, like there was nothing to fell on, like I was flying. My body finally got relaxed after a hellish week. I woke up on the cold floor of a garage, Steve was next to me and as soon as I saw him, I started crying. He hugged me very tight, like he always did. He was running his fingers through my hair, trying to calm me down. "Steve... I-I'm so sorry. I'm so damn sorry. I couldn't save him. I couldn't save your best friend. I'm sorry " I cried. "You did save him. He was acting like the winter soldier and you tried to pull Bucky back. You helped" he made me stand up and lead me to another dirty and cold room. "Buck, she's Y/N. your savior" Bucky was sitting in front of me, looking down at the floor. When he looked up at me, his face changed. He smiled and that smile melted my heart. His face made me want to know everything about him. Steve called me his savior but that smile and those eyes could save me whenever he wanted. "Thanks for saving me doll" Doll, oh my god. I was 100 percent sure I believed in love at first sight.

#imagine avengers #imagine marvel #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes imagine

201 notes · View notes

goddamnedamericanjedi · 7 years

Text

Classic Rock Magazine Interview With Sebastian Bach

It wasn’t the greeting that worried me. During the 13 years that I’ve been interviewing Sebastian Bach, there have been a variety of headlocks and bear hugs. Fortunately, today it’s just a super-firm handshake. Although in the past he’s spat huge globules of phlegm across the room to express disgust at certain subjects, and once even called to talk on a mobile phone whilst taking a piss, neither was I overly concerned about the former Skid Row frontman’s behavior during our encounter.

My biggest reservation was how this particular conversation might conclude. Last time we spoke face-to-face, during a press tour for Skid Row’s 1995 album ‘Subhuman Race’, matters concluded prematurely after I stated the journalistic consensus that the album was considerably below par. “We’ll see who’s still doing this in ten years time,” raged Seb with a face like thunder, before booting the back of my chair, storming from the room and cancelling the rest of his interviews for the day.

That decade he referred to isn’t yet up, but thankfully we’re both still here. “What you said back then hurt so much because I considered a writer like you, who’d written a lot of our early press, to represent the British media,” confides Bach while preparing for Classic Rock’s photo session. “It was hard to take, dude.”

The Canadian had joined Skid Row after being spotted jamming at the wedding of photographer Mark Weiss, and a support spot on Bon Jovi’s ‘New Jersey’ tour gave the fledgling quintet their breakthrough.

Unfortunately, Bach’s dark side was soon revealed and he claimed to have “punched the shit out of Jon, decked him on his fat little ass” when a dispute about a contract Skid Row had signed with Bon Jovi’s Underground publishing company was leaked to the press.

Seb’s wild man credentials were further emphasized by a string of antics, some amusing and some irresponsible. He wiped his derriere on a copy of the Daily Star at Docklands Arena (his tackle flying free in the process) and incurred a lifetime ban at Wembley through playing the song ‘Get The Fuck Out’ when warned not to. Even more regrettably, however, he also wore a T-shirt emblazoned with the slogan ‘Aids Kills Faggots’, and in front of MTV’s cameras threw a glass bottle back into a Massachusetts crowd after it had hit him on the head. A female 14-year-old required 125 stitches.

Finally, Skid Row’s patience snapped, and the relative failure of ‘Subhuman Race’ enabled them to dismiss Bach at the end of 1996. The last time he spoke to Classic Rock, in Issue 13, Sebastian claimed to have no idea why he’d been ‘let go’, adding ruefully: “I’ll never understand why we dropped the ball.” Now a solo artist, his 1999 album ‘Bring ‘Em Bach Alive’ has just been reissued, and Bach has a variety of projects on the go.

DL. You’re here for an appearance on the Never Mind The Buzzcocks, the BBC1 game show. Do you know much about British pop music? SB. Ha ha… no. Well, Iron Maiden had a No 1 record, so that’s pop music, right?

DL. So how will you act when they inevitably take the piss, as they did to Megadeth’s Dave Mustaine and Bruce Dickinson from Iron Maiden? SB. I’ve been on that show twice in America, but the American version flopped - hopefully that wasn’t my fault. I don’t know how a host on British game show could go after me… they’re the retarded ones for paying me $1,800 to come over for 45 minutes work. Dude, everyone says he’s gonna be horrible, but I’ll show him fuckin’ horrible! I can rewrite the fuckin’ level of horrible. I’ll give him a taste of horror.

DL. You recently posted an extremely touching tribute to your father, David Bierk, at your website. Which characteristics good or bad did you inherit from your parents? SB. My dad was a painter who had shows all over the biggest galleries in New York. Elton John, Bon Jovi, Axl Rose and Gene Simmons all bought his paintings. He just let me know that nothing was impossible. My intensity, the way I talk, he made me realize that singing wasn’t a vocational choice, it was a life choice. My only regret is that I’ve been on the road from the age of 13 to now, aged 34, and I missed out on so much family life. I never just got a bowl of popcorn, sat down with my dad and watched the TV. He told me on his deathbed, ‘Everybody in this world is too busy’. I’d say to readers of this magazine, if you’ve got somebody - whether it’s your brother, your mom or sister - just enjoy life with them for just a fuckin’ second, because I look back and God… [trails off].

DL. Since being kicked out of Skid Row in 1996 you’ve spread your wings into TV presenting and appearing in the Broadway versions of Jekyll & Hyde and The Rocky Horror Show. SB. One of my idols, Geoff Tate [of Queensrÿche], keeps calling and asking how I got onto Broadway. The honest truth is that Broadway came to me. I never in a million years thought I’d have the braincells left to memorise the Jekyll & Hyde script. I shit you not, it’s like War And Peace. How it happened was that Jason Flom at Atlantic signed Skid Row in 1987, and Atlantic also has a theatre division. Jason called and said I had the meanest voice and the personality to do it, and believe me when I was Edward Hyde I became Edward Hyde. It was cool music, I swear, some of it’s like ‘Sad Wings Of Destiny’ [the 1976 Judas Priest album].

DL. When a woman in the first row handed you a rose, you bit the head off. Why did you do that? SB. It was my way of saying, ‘I’m on Broadway, but I’m still Sebastian Bach’.

DL. By the time this article is printed, you will be on a year-long US tour playing the lead character in Jesus Christ Superstar. SB. Andrew Lloyd Webber requested a stack of Skid Row CDs, and all my pictures, I swear to God. And he came back and said, ‘Hello, is Jesus Christ there?’, so he made the decision.

DL. Some might say that this is a role you’ve spent your life rehearsing for. SB. [Sounding slightly hurt]: I must be a fucking moron. I never thought you would’ve said that, dude. Sometimes I’m so confused by other people’s perception of me.

DL. Well, they say that you’re an egomaniac. SB. Dude, you have to be on of those to go on stage. What do you want to see, some fucking guy singing [in nerdy, apologetic voice]: ‘We are the youth gone wild’? If I didn’t have my ego I wouldn’t be doing it. I don’t think it’s misplaced though, I hope not. I wake up every day and hope I’m gonna have a great day, be the nicest guy ever. But if someone’s a dick to me, I’m gonna be a fuckin’ dick back to them.

DL. You’re an ass-kicking rock dude from the 80s that’s now playing Jesus. Could you imagine Axl or Vince Neil doing the same thing? SB. Absolutely not, and that’s not a slight against them, Axl has already proved he can’t be on time. I love Axl Rose, but let me get this through everybody’s head: we’re talking eight shows a week for 42 weeks. That’s tough work.

DL. Would you someday like to follow your old rival Jon Bon Jovi into the movies? SB. I don’t differentiate ‘movies’ or ‘Broadway’, what I care about is presenting my fans with something that entertains. And if I’m entertained by it my fans will be, too. So if I got a great film role, yeah, cool.

DL. What do you think of Jon’s acting abilities? And would he work you him in an acting role if the part demanded it? SB. I’ve never seen him really act. There was one movie where he was a pot dealer, and I saw a little bit of that, but he’s a very good actor because he doesn’t smoke pot! I did have acrimony towards Jon for years, but on my Forever Wild TV show I interviewed Tico Torres [Bon Jovi drummer], we played ‘Lay Your Hands On Me’, had a brew at the bar and talked about the old days. All I was ever mad at Jon for was to let me have my own life. That was it. Please, I don’t need someone to hold my fucking hand.

DL. We didn’t get to see your VH1 rock show Forever Wild before it was cancelled back in April. Care to tell us about it? SB. It was kinda obscure, I got to go through the VH1 vaults and pick the videos. We had ‘You Really Got Me’ by Van Halen on the first show, and W.A.S.P.’s ‘I Wanna Be Somebody’… but it was my show!

DL. That explains why it ran for just five months. SB. Yeah, but it was fun. I got to go to Ted Nugent’s 200-acre farm and shoot wild boar, and eat it, of course. I went car racing with Vince Neil and golfing with Tommy Lee. I was in the studio with Rob Halford while he was recording the song ‘Crucible’… waaaaaah! It was 16 episodes, which was twice as long as the [first series of] The Osbournes. Maybe a fifth of the people watched it, but it was a midnight rock show. They offered me another show, at four in the afternoon, but they would be picking the videos and it was cheesy things like Quiet Riot, stuff to laugh at. I will not make fun of heavy metal, or patronize people.

DL. You then resurfaced on - of all things - the Learning Channel’s The New Sideshow, which was described as “a not-for-the-weak-of-heart documentary on today’s more outrageous carnival acts” that included human pincushion The Impaler. Do you do these unusual things to keep you in the public eye, or because you enjoy them? Of course because I enjoy them… doh! Let me offer this piece of advice, I’ve not changed my home phone number since 1989. Never make yourself too inaccessible, it’s good for business when people know where you are. I wake up, press play and it’s, ‘Hey Sebastian, do you want to do this?”… next message, ‘Hey Sebastian, how about this?’ You just have to play the cards that are dealt you, it’s a very different world than it was. I’m in this to sing, so if I can get my voice heard in whatever fashion then that’s what I’ll do. Ozzy is the most famous he’s ever been, not because of his music but because of a fucking TV show. I’m not being flown over to England to sing, I’m being flown over to go on a gameshow. That is fucked. What you also have to consider is that the venues I’ll be playing Jesus Christ in are the same ones that Skid Row headlined for ‘Slave To The Grind’ tour… the Paramount in Seattle, the Fox in Atlanta. But instead of doing one show, I’m now doing eight shows in the same venue. So I’ve finally topped what I did in the past.

DL. C’mon, you must admit you’d rather be coming here to play rock music? SB. I’ve just saw in your magazine that Alex Lifeson says no British promoter wants Rush. Hey, I’ve been asking British promoters since 1996 to come over and they just laugh! I’ve done two full American tours, 104 shows on the first tour, 90 shows on the second, a sold-out tour of Japan. I’m dying to play here, man, but the offers they give me are like… restaurants! Don’t you have to suck first? I’ve never played England and flopped - not fucking once! Thank God for the USA.

DL. You just mentioned The Osbournes. Can you imagine the footage MTV would have got if they’d followed you around in 1992? SB. Ha ha ha, there wouldn’t have been a TV show made out of it. You couldn’t air it. But there seems to be a perception that as soon as we woke up and did drugs and drank, and that’s not true. I never did a show drunk - ever.

DL. Am I right in thinking you’ve cut out most of those antics? SB. I hate that shit, I’ve not done a line [of coke] since 1993. I have no desire to. A part of me still has that personality when I get too sad, when my dad died I was drinking way too much, but just beer. Back in those days everybody was fucking doing it, you were the weirdo if you weren’t.

DL. You were recently involved in what was dramatically reported as “making terroristic threats” to a New Jersey bartender who refused to let you take your drink outside his club, then for having marijuana and rolling papers on you when you were arrested. SB. I’d been shooting an episode of Forever Wild with Vince Neil, who’s always a bad influence on me; they talk about the bad boys of rock, I’m like Queen Elizabeth compared to Vince. But there’s a side of me that can get down and dirty. I was with Vince for a week down on south beach in Miami, waking up each morning and just getting ripped. When I got back to New Jersey, my chick was giving me shit on the phone because she wanted to party with Mötley Crüe. And I was like, ‘Babe, it’s my job, I get paid to party with the Crüe. This is how I feed our kids, so let me party with the Crüe, you stay home and everything’ll be fine’. And she was like, ‘Grrrrrrrrr’. So I go, ‘Fuck you, I’m not coming home’ and tell the limo driver to turn around because we’re going to Broadway. I get a hotel suite and get VH1 to pay for it, order up fucking booze and some other things, and all my friends come over to party. I stayed there for like two days, until she called and was nice to me. It’s a two hour limo drive home and by then I’m so fuckin’ drunk, my chick gives me a little bit of shit. So I take a bunch of Molsons [beers] and walk to this bar, I never drive while drunk. I’ve been going to this bar for 12 years and all these chicks, dudes and businessmen are excited to see me, so then I’m holding court. This guy suggests we go outside and bust a joint, but the bartender says he’s gonna call the police if I take my beer - I told him to go ahead. He fucking rails me, punches me right in the fucking head and I freaked out, so I tackled him around the waist brought him into the one wall, stood on his neck and said, ‘I’ll fucking kill you, mutherfucker’. The whole bar was freaked out, but he threw the first punch. I had a couple of joints in my pocket, so I got busted for marijuana. And the next day’s headline was, ‘Sebastian Bach Busted For Drugs And Terroristic Threats’. Dionne Warwick was arrested for having seven marijuana cigarettes, and I had a joint… someday maybe I can be as wild as Dionne fuckin’ Warwick. What fuckin’ bullshit.

DL. If Skid Row came back to you - and I stress those four words - would you someday agree to rejoin them? SB. It’d all depend on the music, that’s the only reason I joined them in the first place. But Rachel [Bolan, bass] and Snake [guitar] were the best fucking songwriters I ever fuckin’ met, and they just don’t do it anymore. Anyone can go on the internet and find out what happened between me and the guys, just download the Ozone Monday record [make with singer Sawn McCabe]. That was supposed to be the fourth Skid Row record. The reason I’m not singing on it is that it fucking sucks! I mean, Andrew Lloyd Webber or Ozone Monday? Well [chuckles maliciously]…

“Kids think that music is free. My 14-year-old son downloads Arch Enemy and Cradle of Filth songs and I’m the asshole dad who says, ‘Bands worked really hard on those’”

DL. Do you even have any interest in hearing ‘Thick Is The Skin’, the album they’ve made with your replacement, Johnny Sollinger? SB. No. But what fucking year will it come out. Those guys have been saying, ‘We got a whole album done’. Well, let’s fuckin’ hear it. I’m giving you two fucking albums, I’m giving you three fucking musicals, five tours. I’ve got nothing to hide, dude. You may not even like ‘…Bach Alive’, but at least I’m delivering product.

DL. Why do you feel that the band made such a phenomenal early impact, from the Marquee to Hammersmith Odeon in a matter of months? SB. Just the songs and the way we attacked our music. Revolver magazine recently said Skid Row was one of the best metal albums of all time because they played a song like ‘Youth Gone Wild’ like they were playing ‘Angel Of Death’ by Slayer. Would they be so successful now? In the year 2002 kids think that music is free. My 14-year-old son spends all day downloading Arch Enemy and Cradle of Filth and I’m the asshole dad who has to say, ‘You shouldn’t be making those CDs, those bands worked really hard on those’. He looks at me like, ‘What the fuck is your problem?’ I get like emails that say, ‘Sebastian, I went to five shops looking for ‘Bring ‘Em Bach Alive’ and couldn’t find it, but I downloaded it and it fucking rocks, dude’. One the one hand I wanna go, ‘Thanks man’, and on the other hand I wanna hold my head in my hands, but everybody’s in that same situation.

DL. So you were in agreement with Lars Ulrich on the Napster issue? SB. Oh, definitely. I even did this CD called ‘Bach To Basics’ because somebody told me to go onto Napster and when I saw what Sebastian Bach stuff was available I almost fuckin’ committed suicide. The whole The Last Hard Men CD was there, before I even fuckin’ played it for my friends. So I ripped my own CD off Napster and now I sell it on the web.

DL. The last time we were in a room together you lost your temper in a row over ‘Subhuman Race’. Can you now stand back a bit and understand why fans felt it wasn’t as good as the first two? SB. Yeah, but how can a writer say what a record should sound like when they’re not even in the band? What I find humorous is that nobody liked that record, but 12 years later we’re still talking about that fucking record. When I hear ‘Subhuman Race’ now I hear more Bob Rock [producer], because he did the same thing as he did on Metallica’s ‘Load’. He changed things. I remember him saying, ‘Everybody knows you can scream, Sebastian’, and suggesting I sing like Scott Weiland [of Stone Temple Pilots]. Why don’t you just take a thoroughbred racehorse and hit him on the fuckin’ kneecap with a baseball bat? I do like that album, but it’s not a fun record. ‘Youth Gone Wild’ was fun.

DL. Let’s imagine you can go back in time and change three events in your life. If you don’t mind, I’d like to guess that they would be: a) signing away such a large percentage of your royalties to Jon Bon Jovi, b) the bottle-throwing incident and c), not having hit Jon harder. Am I right? SB. Awww, I have more good memories of Bon Jovi than bad ones now. I’ve bashed Jon relentlessly in the past, but I don’t feel that way any more. When I think of those times when I was touring with Bon Jovi and living at his house for two weeks… okay, maybe the deal we signed wasn’t the most equitable of all time, but it’s possible that if we hadn’t, you might never have heard of me. And I respect his tenacity in an industry that devours its young and old alike. So to answer your question… I did wear a really ridiculous T-shirt, and I can’t believe I’m bringing it up again, but it was really rotten, really stupid. And the bottle throwing thing, yeah, I’d change that. Then again, if somebody cracks you in the head with a bottle, what do you do? You ain’t thinking rationally. If somebody hit me with a bottle in the head again I’d probably knock the fuck right out of them.

DL. You even turned down Playgirl? SB. Twice. I already get known for things other than my voice, like my hair or going to jail or whatever, and I want to be known as a singer. That means more to me than anything.

Apart from your Broadway activities, what’s the delay in following up ‘Bring ‘Em Bach Alive’? Atlantic Records signed me in 1987 and they still have first right of refusal [on my work]. ‘Bring ‘Em Bach Alive’ has the Atlantic logo and the Spitfire logo because Atlantic technically owns Sebastian Bach, and they license to certain territories where Atlantic didn’t put it out - including Britain, because Mary Hooton, my great friend, fucking rejected the fucking record.The next record will be done when it’s done. I want to deliver a product that’ll get the proper exposure; I don’t want it coming out three years later in one country than another. I’m doing it, but the fans have to realise how the internet has taken the wind out of the sails of the music industry. There’s always trepidation and anticipation about delivering a CD in this climate.

DL. How do you think you’ll feel aged 65 with 'Youth Gone Wild' tattooed on your arm? SB. I’ll just get “I was the” tattooed on my bicep. Right up here, dude. I got that space reserved.

P.S. Dave says...

Larger than life and twice as unpredictable, Sebastian Bach has now been out of Skid Row since 23rd December, 1996, the day that co-founding guitarist Dave ‘Snake’ Sabo sacked him after receiving a torrent of hate in answerphone form. The parting of ways between singer and the New Jersey band had been a long time coming. Notorious for short-fuse temper as for chiseled cheekbones and multi-octave voice, Bach drove the group’s instrumentalists mental but was accommodated by the rest of Skid Row for as long as their patience would stand. Post-Skids, Bach hasn’t exactly stuck to the traditional route. He acted in the musical versions of Jekyll & Hyde and Jesus Christ Superstar and went on to appear in various TV shows, though age and luvviedom have failed to mellow him. Sebastian recently completed a whirlwind tour of the UK and a new album – his first set of all-new solo material – is due next year. (17th December, 2004)

#Sebastian Bach #Skid Row #The Bazmanian Devil #interview

2 notes · View notes