#plus ingredients for the two other recipes I planned for

[bean-pronounced-bawn]

I know I don't have the energy for it all the time but I love when I cook for myself. 1) it's sexy, 2) I'm not as bad of a cook as I always say I am, and 3) I always make a lot of food, so either I have food for several days or, if I'm in a feeding mood, I can eat a lot at once

[nonranghaes]

it's weird that you don't call out to jun when he comes into your apartment. jun knows that you know he was coming over at some point to spend time with you, and usually you greet him in some way when you hear the apartment door unlock. he's a little earlier than he planned, but you told him to 'come over whenever' and now he's a little worried that you didn't mean it. he quietly slips into the pair of slippers that stays here at your place, and makes his way further into your apartment to set down the bag of groceries he brought on your kitchen counter. your bedroom door is open, but the tiny room you use as a home office is open just a sliver.

he makes his way over, leaning in to listen for a moment... only to hear your voice. there's a little strain to it as you struggle through a sentence, and it clicks all at once: you're speaking chinese. albeit not very well (it's clear to jun that this is one-hundred percent new to you), but you're still trying. your pronunciation is a bit clumsy, but he can hear the way you try to use the right tone with what you're saying...

when did you start learning this much? jun had taught you little things in the past--the absolute basics, really, plus a few other little phrases that veer into his own cheesy need to hear you say sweet things--but this...? he steps back from the door. why hadn't you told him? you could have told him and he'd happily help you learn. but he trusts you: you must have your reasons to keep this a secret, so he won't push. he steps away, deciding to busy himself with getting ingredients put away--or set up for the two of you to cook together, in case you're hungry now.

then he knocks a cup into the sink, and immediately he hears you coming out of your office. relief crosses your face when you see it's just jun, and you lean against the open doorway.

"i didn't know you were here." you pause, and then he sees you get hit with realization. "... how long were you here?"

"i just got here," he says. it's technically the truth, isn't it? he's only been here for a few minutes. "were you working?"

you nod. "yeah. just had to answer a phone call," you lie to him, but he just nods and acts like he doesn't know that. you come up to his side, wrapping an arm around him. "is this for lunch?"

he leans over to you and presses a kiss against your cheek. "are you hungry?"

"mhm," you just snuggle in for a moment, enjoying his presence. "you should teach me more recipes you learned from your mom sometime."

jun finds himself smiling already. was that what this all was...? an attempt for you to understand him better? to show that you care for him so much that you want to know his culture, too? "i'd love to," he says softly, and wraps an arm around you to tug you closer to his side. "only if you teach me things you learned from your family, too."

then he'll make more efforts to understand you and your background, too. just to show you that he loves you as much as you love him.

[verilly]

On my knees for some post-Mithrun fluff rn.

POST MITHRUN FLUFF? I gotchu 😎 it’s going to be bullet points b t dubs, just so I can catch the right mind set… THANKSYU 4 THE REQUEST ILY <3

Mithrun x Reader

•••|•••|•••|•••|•••

Right. So after canon he heads back to Melini (with you, of course) to scout out monsters and demons with his side hustle of making noodles! So as a noble yourself, you follow him to help achieve his dreams!

However, Mithrun is still ticked off at the part where reviving isn’t a plausible option after death, so he’s extremely careful with you. So much so that after a month or so with you trailing with him on his search for monsters, he tosses you in the noodle shop (with the land he had claimed with his noble blood).

At this point, he’s been so surrounded in his want for monster/demon blood that he hasn’t exactly made any progress with the noodle making… and well, neither have you. So there you sat, alone in a big restaurant, with no customers at all, no one to keep you company or to keep you entertained!

So that’s when you decide to try to cook noodles on your own!

You grabbed as many how to guide’s you could from books all over your country, which included recipes from the western territories all the way to the eastern islands! You even scrounged up some old tattered papers from the ex-canaries, Senshi, and the trash.

Collecting herbs, grains, and whatever monster-like ingredients Laios sent to you through the mail.

You decided to keep most of your habits a secret from Mithrun, or at least as you can from him because you wanted to be the one to teach him when the day comes he wanted to pursue his other desire. You always schedule your time practicing for when he's away, and Mithrun being the man that he is always has a set pattern on doing things. Meaning he always came back home almost at the exact same time everyday.

The only other times he'd come home at a later time is when he gets lost, for he has the time of his life navigating the city streets. (This is rare because he likes using his teleportation magic a lot more than actually walking.)

So on this very special day, once you've decided your skills are up to the test, you served him home made noodles. Not only were they home made, so was the sauce/broth. You were quite proud of making such a delicious meal, now it was time to share your talent with your lover.

"Mithrun, wake up, I have a very special breakfast to share with you!" You say, pushing him back and forth from his sleeping state. You'd waken up hours earlier to prepare for this momentous occasion.

No response.

Maybe you should have planned the scheduling better? This was earlier than usual for the ex-captain to wake up... No! You were his partner, he should wake up for you!

"Mithrun wake up!!!" You groan loudly, stopping all your movements before shoving your face into his blanketed stomach, "Please please please please!"

With no words to utter, Mithrun begrudgingly arose from the bed, sitting right up to face you. You beamed with excitement as he looked to face you.

"Why don't you join me down at the resturaunt floor? I have set up something quite amazing down there." You put a finger to your chin and smile, "Plus I think you'll like it a lot!!"

Down the steps the two of you went, where in arrival was the bowl of noodles you had prepared only minutes before. They were served with scallions, mushrooms, a pantry load of seasonings, and whatever meat you had bought fresh from the market a day before.

"What is this?"

"It's noodles! That I made.. for you... 'cause you said you wanted to make them yourself and.... I can see where I messed up a little, but I did it so that I can help you in the future! When you wish to fufill your desire of noodle making!!!" You sheepishly say, a much smaller smile creeping up on your lips.

"I never said you messed up." He said smoothly, teleporting away from you and into the seat in front of the food. You follow closely behind him, sitting at the seat next to him.

"Go on, take a bite! It'll be all for nothing if we run out of time and you need to go out monster hunting." You tilt your head to the right, clasping your hands together.

He looks down at the meal in front of him, and his good eye flickers up and down between you and the noodles. After a few seconds past he picked up the nice utensils you placed next to the bowl and took his first bite.

"So how does it taste? Do you like it??!"

"I don't feel anything in particular for it." He murmurs calmly.

"Ah." Your world view shatters for a moment, before sucking in your pride, "So what makes you feel that way? I thought it was really good, but our tastes are quite different from each other..."

"It's a little too flavorful for me, but I'm... grateful that you spent so much time perfecting this for me. How long was it? A few months?"

"What!!? How did you know that I was..."

"You can't hide things from me, [name]. You'll never be able to succeed."

You stare at him for a second before collapsing on the table before you, "Arghh! I totally thought everything was going to go great, but as it turns out... Mithrun is just too good for me." You pull the bowl towards you, taking the utensils from Mithrun's hand, "And if you don't like it then you don't need to eat it."

"It's not my taste, but I don't mind. Please, I'd rather not leave any left overs, especially if it's a meal from you." His face seemed to soften as he said those few words, and your face reddened in response, letting out an "oh" as you correct your posture.

"Well then if you have time off anytime soon, you could stay here and I could teach you how to make your own noodles that suit your own taste. Then we could actually open the resturaunt to the people." You say sweetly, looking down at the food, watching it dissapear by each passing minute, "I'm sure every being here in Melini would love to eat food made by the hands of a noble. Maybe even the Canaries can home, I'm sure they'd enjoy a meal made by their captain."

"Mm... I'll stay here for today. My desire's growing after eating this d- uhm. Delicious meal you made for me." He states simply, putting the empty bowl and utensils to the side.

"Alright then." You get up from the seat next to him and take his hand, "I'll teach you everything I know." Another smile perks up on your lips as you pull him to the kitchen.

Mithrun in a kitchen. Who could've guessed?!

He's not very skilled at cutting, buthis use of magic fills in the void quite perfectly.

You help him a lot, which includes taking his hands in yours when he begrudgingly uses the knife.

He likes your touches but not the “weapon” in his hands.

You also teach him to pound the noodles, which you usually put lots of energy into, but for him not so much. You have to fill in for him most of the time.

There will come a day where Mithrun won’t go out on expeditions and instead stays with you in the restaurant, for a long time.

And to him, he wouldn’t want to spend his last few (hundreds of) years any differently.

•••|•••|•••|•••|•••

I tried to make it flufffy I don’t know if this is fluff

I hope you liked it :3 pls keep sending me stuff it’ll take like a day - ish for me to fill it out but I def will!!!!!!!

My masterlist is on profile :3

Lots of love, Yours truly.

[miumura]

♯ SWEET ! — GYUVIN ONESHOT ♡

— ♬ : when a baking session gives a chance for one of you to finally admit your feelings to the other. that’s sweet, right?

♡ pairing — childhood!bestfriend!gyuvin x gn!reader ♡

genre ✱ : best friends 2 lovers ; fluff | wc : 3k+ (3328)

warnings — a harmless threat, not rly proofread so …

☏ soph speaks ! bye i finally finishes this anyways , another zb1 imagine yayay !! once again, this is an idea that i thought of late at night..also thought of it when i was midway writing the ricky truth or dare fic 😭 anyways i did have fun making this one, so i hope you do enjoy it as much as i did writing it!

Plop. Plop.

“Hm…what should we do?” Junhyeon sighs loudly, throwing a baseball up in the air repeatedly. The quiet room echoed with the sound of the ball constantly hitting his hand.

“Don’t know—got any ideas Y/N?” Gunwook glances at you peacefully on your phone. Making you look up, he gives you a small smile.

“Uhhh…ask Gyuvin. This is his house anyways.” You shrug, tapping him on the shoulder.

You, Junhyeon, and Gunwook were staying at Gyuvin’s house because his parents are away for a trip. Junhyeon thought it would be a great bonding experience for the span of seven days (although you quite disagree with that).

But clearly, you guys did not have anything planned for today.

Gyuvin being clueless like he usually is, he slowly shakes his head. Laughing at his reaction, Junhyeon suddenly exclaims and snaps his finger.

“Gyuvin, got any baking supplies at home?”

“Yeah, why?”

The next thing you knew, all four of you gathered around the counter in the kitchen.

All of you were surrounding Gunwook’s small phone, reading the recipe for a crepe cake.

“Geez, why is this so complicated?” Gunwook groans, sitting back on the stool. “I give up.”

“Um, no you’re not? Plus, you agreed to this—can’t back out now.” Junhyeon says, eyes still glued on the screen. “And, you’re making the cake with me.”

You four decided to split into two groups—you and Gyuvin, Gunwook and Junhyeon. Junhyeon thought it would be fun to have a competition to see whose cake is better. (and he totally did not request this idea so you and Gyuvin can spend time together.)

“I can’t see the screen.” Two heads were blocking your view, causing you to sit next to Gunwook. Pulling out your phone, you decided to search up the recipe yourself. Once you had the same exact recipe up, you tapped on Gyuvin’s shoulder to get his attention.

Showing him your screen, he gets what you mean and moves to the empty space in the kitchen. Junhyeon smirked slightly then cleared his throat. “Gunwook hurry up. The two already left so no excuses now!” He says, pulling onto Gunwook’s sleeve.

Leaving Junhyeon with a whining Gunwook, you placed your phone on the counter. You two looked at the screen together, reading the ingredients carefully.

“…All purpose flour…” Your voice trailed off, walking towards the cabinet. Scanning the shelves, you spotted the big bag of flour. Picking it up, you made your way to Gyuvin who was still reading off your phone.

“Can’t read instructions now?” You said, placing the bag onto the table. Gyuvin looked at you to give you a blank stare, not noticing how close you were to him when you asked. Looking back at the screen and clearing his throat, he pretended that didn’t happen.

“I can read. We need sugar too.” Stating the obvious, you grinned at his response. Leaving Gyuvin and his slightly reddened cheeks, you made your way back to the kitchen. Looking up at the cabinets, you assumed one of them had it.

Now, why the hell were the cabinets so high up? Your hand briefly touched the cabinet handle, not even giving you a chance to open it.

You hated doing this, but you had to for the sake of the baking process.

“Gyuvin!” You said in a monotone, hearing his footsteps get closer as you continued to look at the counter.

“Hm?” He asks in an obvious tone, knowing very well you were staring at the cabinets above you.

“Get the sugar from the cabinet, please.” He smirks slightly, mocking your voice, “Can’t reach for stuff in cabinets now?” Your remarks sure do bite you back.

“Oh, shut up. Just quickly get it.” You were about to walk away until Gyuvin groaned, making you turn around. “Looks like I can’t reach it either.” You watched him lazily reach the cabinets, brushing over the handles. You can just imagine a mischievous grin spreading across his face right now. Feeling frustrated, you walk over to him.

“Don’t waste our time!” You pleaded, hoping he’d just get the sugar already. He wanted to tease you more, he wore a huge grin and pretended he didn’t hear you. He continued to “struggle” with getting the cabinets open, as if this wasn’t his own house.

Hearing his cheeky tone, you huffed out in response. Clearly agitated about him to be making fun of your height, you just decided to ask him for another favor.

“Okay, that’s enough. At least carry me up there so I can get it or something…” You mumbled quietly yet Gyuvin was still able to pick up what you’ve said.

Feeling his cheeks go warm, he avoids eye contact with you. “What?”

“Listen, you either help me or I’ll ask Gunwook and Junhyeon to help me instead. Or I don’t know—I’ll drag a chair over, whatever you prefer.” He remained silent, making the situation feel awkward as silence filled the kitchen.

“…Alright then.” He finally spoke, already getting lower. “A piggy back ride?”

“That works.” You jumped onto his back, your arms carefully wrapped around his neck. He effortlessly lifts you up, bringing you closer to the cabinet. You opened the cabinet at last, forcing him to back up a little so the door didn't hit him in the eye while still carrying you.

You smiled slightly, relieved to finally have the jar of sugar in your hands. "That wasn't too difficult, was it Gyuvin?"

Gyuvin scoffed playfully, “Couldn’t have done it without me.”

“Okay, okay. You get the credit, I guess. Now, put me down before I drop the sugar.”

“And if I don’t?”

“I’ll kill you.” You heard his sweet, hearty laugh and wished you could replay it in your brain. He kept playing around with you, keeping you steady and doing a few spins here and there. Hearing your screams made Gyuvin continue, temporarily ignoring the baking duties that needed to be done.

Holding him tightly, you tried your best to keep the clear jar from slipping out of your hands.

“You’re gonna drop it, Gyu!” Still teasing you, he smiled at the nickname. "Are you sure? I'm not the one who has it."

"You better not let me down or I'll drop it and you'll have to clean it!" He still didn't take you seriously enough, knowing how horrible you'd feel if you did.

“Sureeee.” He continued to drag on the word. “ You’d totally do that.”

As you two continued to bicker jokingly, Junhyeon and Gunwook secretly took photos of you two, waiting to use them to tease Gyuvin.

“Pinterest worthy?” Gunwook shows Junhyeon the amount of pictures he took of you two. The pictures continued to go on as he scrolled, gaining a thumbs up from Junhyeon.

“Oh yeah, definitely.” After gaining his approval, Gunwook saved all the pictures onto a photo album titled, “Gyuvin ♡ YN.” He should be thankful that neither of you has seen or has access to that album; if you did, he and Junhyeon would be dead by now.

“Alright, we finally got what we needed!” Glancing at the other two, you noticed they were starting to get ready as well. Looking around the area you and Gyuvin went to, you realized there were no aprons. Since Junhyeon was the closest one to them, you decided to call out his name.

“Junhyeon!” Your clear voice got his attention, making him pause his short singing session. “Pass us two aprons, please.” He nodded, throwing two white polka dotted aprons across the room.

“Here.” You said, passing the apron to Gyuvin. You had yours on with ease, unlike Gyuvin. He struggled with tying the two straps together, feeling his arms getting sore already.

He stood there silently watching you tie your hair up while appearing not to struggle. Clearly, he thinks there's something wrong with his apron, and he's still convinced he could do something like this.

"You ready?" You turned to see Gyuvin with his hands still behind his back. "Uh, yeah." He finally lets go of his hands, the straps slipping free once more. The apron reopened, once again not wrapped around his waist. He sighed in defeat as you walked closer to him, chuckling.

"I'll help you." You made him turn around and grab the straps to properly tie them. Junhyeon couldn't keep his voice quiet any longer in the distance. Junhyeon and Gunwook both said "ooo" in unison, lingering on the expression. Gunwook had a wide smile on his face and was repeatedly hitting Junhyeon's shoulder in excitement, evidently pleased with the level of intimacy today. As a result, Gyuvin covered his face with his hands and made you make a slight smile.

"Couple things! Aw, look at the matching aprons too!" Junhyeon yells merely to gain your and Gyuvin's attention. Oh, how easy it was to notice the chemistry between you two. You two hit it off right away, much like your mom and his mom did. You've lived the majority of your life with Gyuvin by your side—first birthday party, first tooth being taken out, first day of school—he was constantly there for you.

You've been there for him through thick and thin—you two were that close. It was pleasant to be in each other's company, unable to separate.

People have assumed you two are in a relationship because they have always seen you two together. That wasn’t the case, but you both secretly wanted more than just a childhood best friend title. It was so obvious, yet you two are still unsure whether the other is picking up the signal or not.

Just one day. You constantly tell yourself, knowing you’d probably experience that sweet feeling of love soon, hoping it’ll be with Gyuvin.

That’s exactly what he wanted as well.

Unlike you two, Junhyeon and Gunwook knew exactly what you intended to say to each other, despite your denials. Those two have been doing everything they can to get one of you to confess since day one.

Tired with this back-and-forth flirtation (which you two were unaware of), your friends decided that today would be the day for one of you to confess. They didn't care who was going to, they just wanted you and Gyuvin to quit messing about.

This is why they constantly tease you both, let alone have a photo album of you two. They intended to show you the photos when you finally start dating. They sure were dedicated to this ship.

Finally finishing up with the knot, you hummed, pleased with how pretty the bow looked. You tapped onto his shoulder to show that you were done. You and Gyuvin immediately went to bake, completely engrossed in the instructions.

Quickly finishing up with the batter, you glanced at the next step.

“Oh right—we have to make a lot of these.” You looked at the screen, holding the bowl in one hand. “Are you good at flipping, Gyu?”

“Of course I am! I’m good at everything.” He says as he rolled up his sleeves, gaining a questionable look from you. He gives you his “what?” face only for you to make your way to the stove.

“We will see about that!” You teased, hoping he’d fail just so you could keep talking about it the whole day. Junhyeon and Gunwook quickly joined you two, turning on the other stove.

You held the bowl out for Gyuvin as you watched him prepare the pan and check the heat. He scooped a large cup of batter and stopped pouring when he heard you laugh faintly. "That's a lot of batter, Gyu." "What are you making, pancakes?"

He stood there staring at the huge blob of batter in the center of the pan, unsure what to do. You kept staring at him, waiting for his next move. He seemed to be about to make a decision as well, plainly worried for no apparent reason. To spread the batter, you reached for the pan and moved it in a circular motion.

"This will be our practice one." You comment quietly as you brush your arm on his. "Plus, I think Gunwook is burning his crepe right now." You two laughed at the charred edges of his crepe and the loud screeching noise Junhyeon made as he flipped it over.

Gyuvin quickly finished the failing crepe and placed it on a plate. You peeled apart the crepe despite how hot it was. You quickly fed Gyuvin first before taking a bite as well. You stared at his expression, hoping that the crepes were fine. His eyes widened as he remembered how much he liked the taste of these.

Exhaling a sigh of relief, you decide to continue. As long as it tastes good, presentation doesn’t matter. You pour the batter again, this time making sure sure it's the right amount. You peered at the pan, perfectly swirling the batter around, waiting for the crepe to be done.

“You wanna flip it?” Gyuvin grins, getting ready to show you his skills. “Saw this a youtube video, just watch this.”

Instead of flipping it with a spatula, he throws it in the air in an attempt to get it to return to the pan. The crepe, however, broke apart, with half of it in the pan and half in Junhyeon and Gunwook's uncooked batter. You giggled when Junhyeon scolded Gyuvin for being so irresponsible (despite the fact that he would do the same thing).

"...I believe we'll have to leave the cooking to me now." You teased as Gyuvin returned from his scolding. He smiled awkwardly, nodding and displaying his flushed cheeks. Oh, how adorable he was. Gyuvin stood behind you, admiring your skills as you expertly flipped each one. He's wondering if you're good at everything and how he ever met someone like you.

He sure thinks you’re perfect.

With a dish full of nicely stacked crepes, you and Gyuvin went straight to work on the cream. Fortunately, Junhyeon and Gunwook were still struggling to flip them over—some flipped into half, uncooked, and burnt.

“Got all the stuff?” Gyuvin nodded, carrying all the ingredients to you. Bringing the silver bowl closer, you automatically followed the recipe. You put the ingredients in, fresh butter and condensed milk. You left the whisking to Gyuvin, handing him the hand mixer.

“Woah, be careful how you handle that machine.” You say, jokingly backing away and covering your face. Gyuvin scoffs, shaking his head.

"I won't make a mess, so come on over." He gestured rapidly, not wanting to disrupt the flow of his mixing. He mistakenly hits a button while looking at the other two people who are burning their crepes. The mixer moves quickly, causing cream to spatter all over the place. The cream got all over his and your clothes and faces. After hearing your yells, he quickly presses the normal button and glances at himself and your clothes.

"What in the hell did you do?" You say this while glancing at the mess Gyuvin has made. It was all over the seats, the table, and even the floor.

He chuckles at the cream on your face, leaving you with a frown that gradually becomes a smile. "I'll go get you some tissues." He gives you the mixer and goes off to find some.

He returns with a box and places it on the table. "Thankfully, it didn't get all over our clothes." Gyuvin wipes the cream from his face, making sure he doesn't leave any behind. You chuckled and kept mixing without wiping your face.

After cleaning up, he notices you still in the mess. He grabs a couple of tissues, walking toward you. While gently grabbing your chin to avoid startling you, he wiped some off your cheek. He examines your face, making certain that everything is clean. You looked away from the mixture and at his focused face. Your faces were merely inches apart—too close.

Your breath hitched, the close proximity between you two was killing you. Damn, he really does look pretty this close.

“Geez, are you allergic to cream? What’s the deal with your red face?” He asks such a dumb question, making you clear your throat. “Shut up, no.” He ignores your remarks, continuing to help you clean your face.

He finishes, leaving to throw out the tissues and you processing what just happened. Junhyeon whistles, snapping you out of your thoughts. You jokingly reached for the box of tissues to throw at him, easily making him say sorry.

“I think it’s done.” You say as Gyuvin comes back. You taste a bit of the cream, nodding your head in satisfaction. He clasps his hand and hums in excitement, he couldn’t wait to eat the cake.

“Okay..I hope you don’t mess this up too.” You say jokingly, cautiously handing him the supplies. He playfully grins at you, hoping he doesn’t mess up this either.

To your surprise, he was pretty good at it. You admired his physique, watching every move he made. Anyone could make up the heart eyes you were giving to this guy right now.

Placing the last crepe, he covers it swiftly with the remaining cream. Pleased with how it turned out, he looks at you with puppy-like eyes. “Do you like it?” He looks at you with anticipation, hoping you’d say yes.

“Of course I do. It’s missing something though.” He looks at you, wondering what was missing. You walked towards the fridge, taking out the freshly washed strawberries. “Let’s top it off with these?”

Opening the lid, you decide to give them to Gyuvin—he’s good at decorating after all. Coming up with a quick idea, he smiles lightly to himself, catching your attention. You watched him place them perfectly, trying to make the small strawberries align.

He finishes placing the last strawberry, grabbing a wet wipe to clean his now red hands. The words read, “I ♡ U”, making you giggle at the sudden message.

“I love you? Seriously, all of a sudden?”

“What? It’s just something I’ve been wanting to say to you—“ His hands flew to his mouth, eyes widening after realizing what he had said. Your eyes widened as well, standing them dumbfoundedly.

“What?”

“Oh my god, ignore what I said—I’m sorry I didn’t want to make you feel—“

“Do you mean it romantically or?”

“Romantically.” His gaze avoids yours, trying to come up with an excuse. “But just ignore what I said—“

“Why should I ignore what you said when I feel the same?” Your eyes were on him, making him feel shocked and shy by your response.

“Wait, what?”

“I feel the same way, you idiot.”

“Really?”

“I’m serious, Gyu.”

He stares at you with excitement, realizing you could’ve been together a while ago. Facepalming, a wide smile is hidden under his hands. Your faces were covered with blush, feeling the awkward yet sweet presence fill the room.

“Does that mean…” He trails off, voice eventually fading due to embarrassment.

“I’m assuming so..” You say awkwardly, not quite familiar with these relationship stuff. But that’s okay, you’ll figure it out with Gyuvin.

“Kiss!” Junhyeon shouts, not wanting to contain his excitement anymore. He said the word that everyone had been waiting for. Junhyeon and Gunwook knew their plan would pay off. His smile then vanishes once he smells something unpleasant.

“Junhyeon, did you burn our crepe again?! We only have eight finished crepes!” Gunwook shrieks, his smile also fading as well. In unison, they groaned, not wanting to continue anymore.

You and Gyuvin chuckled at the guys, slowly stopping to look at each other.

“Want a slice?” He cuts a big slice to share with you. Handing you a plastic fork from the cupboard, you two eat the cake.

“This is sweet.”

“Tastes even better since we’re sharing.” He smiles at you, anticipating the next steps that will be taken in this new relationship.

Now, this is the sweet feeling you’ve been waiting for.

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[asshlyyyy]

Strawberry Pie

It is time to get rid of some drafts that I have had for months at this point. Even if they have a few sentences I want to get them out. I also hope that having these one-shots thrown in people will remember me... and maybe my posts will do better then... (22 notes). It really is unmotivating sometimes. Looking at your follower count and then your notes. Like so far... the year is not going good for this account.

Masterlist

Pairing: Austin Butler x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of Death, Fluff, Mentions of Baby Talk, Perhaps Some Swearing. Spelling and Grammatical Errors. Let me know if I missed anything!

Word Count: 1.6k

You scrolled through the list of songs on your phone. Today you were in a cheerful mood. You were happy, and you felt no sense of sadness. Let’s not jinx it just yet, but you had big plans today. Austin was out with his agent talking about some upcoming deals. You wanted to surprise him with a small gift. 

Once you finally decided on the song you turned off your phone and went over to your recipe box. You only had a few recipes in there that were from you, but you had your grandmother’s as well. She always talked about how you were going to get that box when she died and well… That day came a couple of months ago. It still pained you, but you were finally in a good mood. 

Peering through all the recipes your eyes found the one you wanted, Strawberry pie. You remember eating this during the summers at your grandmother’s house. It was such a fond memory and such a wonderful pie. You pulled it out of the box and brought it over to the middle island. 

You brought out all of the ingredients needed and started to get to work. You had a few hours before Austin came in, so in theory… the pie should be cooled down when he arrives. That way you two can have a slice after dinner. Seems like today is a day you’ll be spending in the kitchen. You had no issue with that though. You loved being a housewife. 

As stereotypical as it was… it was nice. Not having to worry about working. You were able to stay home, keep the house clean, cook your husband a wonderful dinner… or order it… and tend to other matters. Hopefully one day you can add a little one to the equation. For now, that wasn’t on Austin’s list and you had to respect that. 

For dinner, you had planned a dish that would go along with your pie. You were thinking about making salmon with mashed potatoes, and then some type of veggie on the side. It just depended on what you had. That seemed like a good meal, and then you two could have some pie afterward… It sounded perfect. 

Once everything was in the oven and everything was getting cooked you decided to take a break. You untied your apron and took it off. You’ve been standing on your feet for some time now, you wanted to sit down, and that is exactly what you ended up doing. You grabbed your phone to check your notifications.

A few messages from Austin, some even from your sister. A missed call from your mother, a few emails- wait… a missed call from your mother? You went ahead and called her back. Your mother usually didn’t call. If she did, she would let you know. Plus, she didn’t leave a message either which… is even weirder. 

“Hello?” Your mother’s voice entered your ear.

“Hi momma, I was just returning your call. I didn’t know you called.” You said to her. 

“Oh, I didn’t mean to. I just accidentally hit the call button instead of something else. I tried to hang up quickly so… I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry honey.” Your mother explained. You let out an oh sound and nodded.

“It’s okay, I just thought it was weird is all. Figured I would give you a call and check-in. Make sure that everything is okay.”

“Well, now that I got you. What’s going on? Anything exciting happening today?” She asked you.

“Well, you remember that strawberry cake grandma would always make us in the summer?” You questioned her. 

“Of course I do,” she replied.

“Well, I decided to make that today for Austin. I was just feeling in a good mood and I figured to use that energy and create something with it.” You explained to her.   

“Oh, that sounds delicious. I wish you would bring us some over, but that is too long of a drive.” Your mother chuckled. You rolled your eyes playfully and shook her head.

“Well next time you guys come and visit, or we come to yours to visit I’ll be sure to make some. I know Grandma would want me to share it.” You told her. 

“Yeah, she would have.” Your mother said softly, “I miss her.”

“I miss her too… it’s been rough… I honestly hoped I would’ve had kids before she passed. She was such a wonderful lady but… You have one fall and it’s all downhill from there…” You replied back with a soft tone. Here was the sadness, that sadness you all so had to jinx yourself with earlier. 

“I know… but, she’s still around. In our hearts… in our minds… in spirit. She will always be around. We just can’t see her,” Your mother recited some type of religicall sentence. Like the father, son, and the Holy Spirit. 

“I know… well… I better get back to it then. I have to check on the Salmon and see how the pie is cooling. Bye, momma, I love you.”

“I love you too, honey.” She replied and hung up. You placed your phone down and let out a sigh. 

You pushed yourself up and walked over to the big sliding glass doors. You pushed them open and stood in the middle. You felt the cool wind brush past your skin in a soothing manner. The clear blue skies let you know that… she was here. The clear blue skies those summers you would spend with her. 

You smiled softly and went back to check your mood, leaving the doors open to let in fresh air… and maybe even your grandma. You knew spirits could do anywhere they wanted, but your grandmother was a respectful woman. She would only enter when allowed, and when it was okay. 

You pulled out the food and started to get the plates ready. You heard a ding from your phone and went to quickly check it. A text from Austin that read, Just down the street. I’ll be home soon :P 

You giggled lightly at the expression he added and shook your head. For once, you had managed your time, and everything will fall into place right when you need it to. You brought the food over to the table and went to quickly wipe your hands. You rushed over to the door and opened it just as Austin was.

“Oh, hi,” Austin chuckled lightly. You smiled and pushed yourself up on your tippy toes and kissed his cheek.

“Hi, I missed you.” You greeted him and moved out of the way. 

“I missed you too, sweetheart… but what is going on?” He looked at you confused.

“What do you mean?”

“You hardly greet me at the door.” He pointed out to you. 

“Well- you aren’t wrong, but I made dinner… and I made a special dessert. One I’ve been wanting to make you for quite some time.” You explained to him.

“Let me freshen up and I’ll meet you in the kitchen then okay?” With a nod of your head, Austin made his way upstairs to freshen up. 

You made your way back over to the kitchen and decided to get the drinks. You poured two glasses of water and brought them over to the table. You sat down and patiently waited for Austin. You looked out into your guys’ backyard and smiled. Your grandmother’s backyard was a field of memories. Easter time in the annual Y/l/n egg hunt. You always won of course. No one could ever beat your skills. 

You remember around Christmas time when you would go out with your grandparents and build snowmen with them. The snowball fights you all shared. The summer barbecue with the strawberry pie. God, you’re going to miss having those every year. 

“Oh wow,” Austin said as he entered the kitchen. You looked over at him and smiled.

“Remember how I tell you the stories about my grandma’s strawberry pie?” You asked him gently. He nodded and found his way across from you.

“Every time you tell it, it leaves my mouth watering.” He chuckled lightly. 

“Well… I made it,” you smiled.

“Is there a special occasion? I didn’t forget anything right? Cause I swear our anniversary isn’t until another two months. Your birthday isn’t until another five months… As far as I know, today is nothing.” He started to freak out a bit. You laughed gently at him. 

“I guess I just wanted to celebrate being in a good mood. It’s been rough these few months you know… and I finally wake up and I’m in a good mood. Wanted to treat my boyfriend.” You admitted to him.

“Dammit, I knew I should’ve stopped for flowers.” He swore at himself. 

‘’Austin stop,” you shook your head, “you get me flowers all the time. I wanted to treat you for once.”

“I love you,” Austin said as he reached over for your hand. You blushed gently as he gave your hand a squeeze.

“I love you too.” 

“Well, shall we dig in so we can get to that pie?” Austin suggested with a smile. You nodded early and started to eat your dinner. 

You two talked about each other's day. Though, Austin’s was much more entertaining than your baking story. Though, Austin would never say that. He always had nice things to say no matter what. When the time came to eat pie, you two went out onto the deck to enjoy it. Where you shared stories about your grandma to him.

“Maybe one day we can do that.” Austin hummed from beside you. You turned to look at him confused. What did he mean by that? “Make new memories with our kids.”

“Our kids…?”

“Yeah, I think… I think we can start trying. That is if you want to of course. Share your grandma’s pie to generations.” He smiled as he wrapped his arm around you. 

“I would like that,” you whispered and kissed him softly. 

I think you all could have noticed that I don't post as much as I used to. It's mostly because I am loosing motivation. I know I talk about the lack of notes a lot... but it really is a big factor. I used to get hundreds and now I'm barely breaking a hundred.

I know it sounds like I'm being ungrateful but I'm just lost and confused in what happened.

Thank you to everyone who voted for a time! I really appreciate it. Also, this is my first time using the queue function so… let’s see if I did it right.

Mutual Taglist: @babyhoneypresley @emmymaehereeeeee @venus-haze @austinstyles

[kitashousewife]

hello heids!! for your writing prompt question- what about megumi and baking together?

oooh hi kaia!! yes i love this hehe thank you for sending this!!! it is making the wheels turn

-

"two cups? are you sure?" megumi turns over his shoulder, measuring cup hovering over the mixing bowl you set in front of him minutes earlier.

"is that what the recipe says?"

he scans the recipe for what must be the 10th time, ensuring that it does in fact list one cup of flour.

"yes, but it just seems like a lot."

you hum while you join his side once more, returning from the pantry with chocolate chips.

"i know, but trust me it's not. i've made these a hundred times. plus, i'm sure everyone will love them nonetheless,"

megumi stirs slowly, incorporating the flour a little at a time. he's seen you do it before, so it must be the right thing to do. once the dough gets a little more combined, you slide the chocolate chips over to him from across the island.

"after these, we just gotta form the cookies and bake them!"

his finger slides down the worn recipe page until it lands on the chocolate chips. grabbing the cup measurement once more, he laughs.

"what's so funny?"

"i've watched you make these for the past three years and i know for a fact you add more of these than it calls for,"

you shrug, lips pulling into a smirk.

"maybe i do," your arms push behind you as you prop yourself up next to the bowl. reaching your finger down and grabbing a scoop, you smile as the dough hits your taste buds. "but i've never seen you complain!"

he smiles, a big and toothy grin, situating the individual scoops on the baking sheet.

"and you never will, either."

megumi finishes up rather quickly, placing the tray in the oven and setting a timer while you follow behind him. each ingredient has been put away by the time he returns after washing his hands.

you aren't quite sure how you ended up baking a few dozen cookies at 2:30 am. after a long day of work for you, and a late meeting with a few fellow sorcerers for megumi, you couldn't leave each other's sides. ordering take-out so that you didn't have to move, before falling asleep in each other's arms on the sofa shortly after ate up most of the evening.

regardless, you wouldn't have it any other way. it's the weekend, neither of you have obligations in the morning. and besides, who are you to deny your hard working boyfriend of a few fresh cookies?

"i think i'll take quick shower. if the timer goes off before i'm out, could y-"

megumi is cut off by your finger brushing underneath his cheekbone ever so lightly to dust off some lingering flour. he grins, taking your hand in his and placing a kiss on your fingers.

"of course i will."

he leans back against the island and pulls you closer.

"on second thought," he kisses the top of your head. "i think i'll wait 'til they're done. i'd rather shower with you,"

you smile at that. megumi never misses an opportunity to do something with you, even if it's as little as folding laundry of taking out the trash. no matter what, he's right by your side.

"i think i like that plan better anyway."

megumi kisses your lips, smiling against you as he tastes the cookie dough you snuck earlier.

the timer goes off as the clock strikes three, and you roll your eyes.

"we've gotta get to bed earlier,"

megumi just laughs, turning the oven off and grabbing your hand.

"maybe some day. but i'll never regret staying up with you."

[monstercampus]

Ellie my birthday is coming up soon!! can I ask how the monsters on campus celebrate the little human's birthday?

omg happy birthday my love!!!! i hope you have/had a wonderful day <333

A lot of monster species don't actually celebrate birthdays, so it's a new concept for them! Some cultures and species acknowledge it but don't have celebrations, some celebrate communal birthdays annually with one huge party for everyone, and others have a variety of practices that vary from place to place and race to race. But anybody who knows even a little bit about humans knows they love to celebrate their day of birth, so they'd work really hard to make you feel welcome and happy even though you're far from home!

For one, a lot of your fellow students and friends will consult professors like Dr. Wellwright for help--their resident harpy and human expert has all sorts of books piled high on his shelves on human behavior, plus he's spent the most time with humans in their own spaces as an alumni of a previously humans-only university, so he has lots of wisdom to offer! He'll help divy up tasks for everyone so all your friends can feel like they're pitching in for you <3 It'll be like its own event on campus: preparing for their first human student's (surprise) birthday party!

Obviously Priam and Anton are heading this operation as your roommates, so their co-operation is tested to the limits as they prepare the dorm with a subtle hand. The party's gonna take place elsewhere so everyone involved can attend, but they've first got to make sure that nothing's out of place for the day itself; cleaning the apartment is one thing, but they're also gonna make sure you get a proper introduction to the day with breakfast and a small present or two--they don't want you to think everyone forgot, after all! So while they're gonna argue about what to make you to eat, and whether or not Priam can wake you with kisses and snuggles (because he cannot be trusted to let you up afterwards!) the shadow that lingers in your room will also prepare by conjuring up some sweet, pleasant dreams to show you the night before you wake up. They want to give you good dreams, but also let you indulge in those sweet, nostalgic memories of home so you have something to look back on fondly the moment you awaken.

In the meanwhile, Jelly and Ollie get tasked with the cake (supervised by prof Aryck, of course) which you would think would be a disaster....and it is! But a tasty one. Ollie wants to make sure the baking is perfect, but Jelly's all wrapped up in making sure you have a selection of everything you could want. So while she's hustling around with a million different ingredients and a dozen different recipes going at the same time, Ollie's rushing behind her to dial down the oven temperatures and fix the mistakes in the batter bowls she leaves behind. By the end the kitchen will be a right mess, and Ollie will be exhausted, but they'll have a spread to be proud of to present to you--and Jelly will clean up the aftermath in the kitchen as recompense. Besides, nobody wants to see Aryck get mad over a careless, left-behind kitchen mess. Your holes would likely never recover

Being the muscle of the operation, the werewolves on the team will task themselves with setting up your party space, with Tentacles offering aid in sprucing up the place and keeping things clean and Huxley bringing along the orcs to build some nice tables and chairs for everyone to use. Initially the plan would be to host it inside, but they'll end up setting everything up out by the beach on the lake--that way you can enjoy the nice weather and have a swim if you'd like! Plus, some of the monsters in attendance (ie. Nessie, the Kraken, Tentacles, Jelly, etc) don't do well without water for long stretches of time, so it's a win-win! They'll also have their resident gorgon August shyly offering up some flower arrangements to decorate with, and though they'll be scarce during the event they'll leave a little present for you behind with a singing snapdragon barette inside.

Lidya and Jude have the task of gathering up entertainment, to which there's no better option than to pull out the big guns and set up the most impressive games they have to offer. Lidya will rig up their biggest DDR-style machine (safely away from the shoreline) along with a bunch of other group games for everyone to play, as well as a couple beach balls and a football to keep the wolves enriched. And whether by choice or through bribery Jude will get his program loaded into the dance machine so he can participate, and so you can see him too!

You wouldn't think it would be a necessity, but Efraim, Zombie, and King Bee all share the responsibility of keeping your birthday a secret, too. As liked as you are by many, there's still enough scrutiny from those other monsters that your friends know there's a chance of them trying to screw it all up. The last thing they want is for some unwanted guests to crash your party or just make you feel bad with mean comments on your special day, so the three of them work for weeks to make sure that nobody that's not invited stumbles upon your party by the beach or even knows it's your birthday until it's all over. As an added precaution, Cyrus guards the event from a respectable distance, so even if someone does come by he can turn them away before they even get close. Nobody in their right mind wants to be on the other end of those hooves anyways.

And there are some who, even if they aren't at your party for long or at all, celebrate in their own little ways with you. Elyos, the statue outside your apartment, hands you a little bouquet when you walk by because the pixies told him about your birthday--and they helped pick the flowers, too! They'll slip you a little card they made alongside it, along with enough birthday kisses to match every year all over your pretty face! And though Isaac is forbidden from attending, he'll still have a gift for you that he sneaks into your pocket as you walk by....but he can't quite bring himself to hand over the letter he wrote and rewrote a hundred times, so that one he keeps to himself. Later, he promises himself.

Some of your profs will make a brief appearance at the event as well, but most of them will stick to cards and small gifts given to you beforehand or after class. Cookies from Aryck, a handmade music box from Sheela, a prized treasure from the Dean's hoard, woven mittens from Mr. M, a raven-feather quill from the Doctor, a spiritual enlightenment pamphlet from the Archangel.....all manner of things, but each one with plenty of thought behind it, you can rest assured. Everyone has so much fun at your party, they'll insist on doing the same next year too! In fact, they all might want to start celebrating more birthdays just so everyone can get together and have fun all over again! You might have to move into a bigger room to fit all the gifts you'll get, though--some of the things the monsters come up with are just wild.

[theajaheira]

I dont know your girls, but tell us 17. how do they celebrate their birthday?

HI THANKS !!! <33

marigold keeps trying to con people out of remembering that it’s her birthday because she can’t handle positive attention despite craving it constantly and she doesn’t want people to go out of their way for her despite also craving that constantly. so she will be that girl going “oh i don’t want a celebration!!!!! it’s fine!!!!” when she actually kinda does lowkey but has 87 psychological problems. her mom and sisters have danced this dance for 12 years though so they very patiently ignore her when she does this and just put on a really cute and small party (family only, plus jaheira’s kids every so often) with an exorbitant amount of really silly gifts. sofie’s gifts are always new drafts of magic recipes inspired by marigold and they always make marigold extremely emotional.

evie uhhhhh . Oh man. does she even know when her birthday is? her mind is kinda soup by the time canon happens. i think when she finds it out again she’s probably supremely indifferent and astarion is like GODS i have to do EVERYTHING around here and figures out a way to throw her an extremely extravagant party on ye olde brother’s credit card. she does in fact ditch this party with him to sit on the roof and throw hunks of birthday cake at all the fancy guests he invited. ideal times for evie

birthdays are a little hard on roslin with her family in another city, so the actual date she was born is a family only secret bc she gets a little twitchy if customers start wishing her a happy birthday. the bakery ladies put on a much more lowkey version of the marigold party (the nice wine is brought out and everyone makes something fun for dinner) and everyone gives ros a single present that she probably cries over for like 10 minutes. very sweet.

lenora’s birthday is some sort of deranged affair because when she was 9 and moved to live with thea she refused to admit she had a birthday, so thea had to use all of her governmental connections to figure out norie’s birthday and subsequently figure out how to sneak attack norie with a celebration. her version of a sneak attack was probs just a surprise cake but she explained the concept to ros and mari and they got. Overzealous. so every year the bakery ladies act like they’ve forgotten norie’s birthday, they don’t remember norie’s birthday, and then WHAM someone dumps an industrial tub of confetti on lenora while she’s trying to go into the kitchen (which marigold has used illusory magic to turn into a giant ballroom full of presents.) norie LOVES THIS bc she gets to complain and moan and pretends she hates it and also she gets presents and the attention of her sisters. Wins across the board.

thea wasn’t planning to mention her birthday to anyone, but her daughters asked jaheira about it. jaheira actually already knew when it was, which thea did NOT know about because jaheira has never gotten her anything for her birthday and paired it with an actual verbal “happy birthday,” so when every other year or two jaheira would randomly give her a new weapon or some rare ingredients on her birthday & then immediately leave, she’d just be like. Does she know??? no she can’t. But does she????

the girls like surprising thea but ros and mari have zero subtlety. norie COULD pull off a surprise but really doesn’t care enough to try bc she knows thea is expecting it every year. they like to take thea for a picnic by the chionthar with a bunch of her favorite pastries (that she taught them to make) and goof around and talk about all the fun stuff they got up to over the last year. all of thea’s presents are always handmade (mari usually makes her a long term preservable snack that is both magical and delicious, norie embroiders her something, ros also embroiders her something which is a real labor of love because ros fucking hates embroidery and is very bad at it).

[shepherds-of-haven]

If the Shepherds were divided into groups and had a cooking contest, which group would serve THE most exquisite dish? Who would burn things?🔥🔥🔥

I ran it through a random generator and here are the teams!

Group 1: Ayla, Halek, Tallys

Group 2: Mimir, Trouble, Lavinet

Group 3: Blade, Shery, Riel

Group 4: Briony, Red, Chase

As for how things would shake out:

Group 1 would sweep the competition FOR SURE. Assuming we can split them into traditional kitchen roles of Chef, Sous-Chef, and uhh Prep Cook or whatever that role is called, Halek and Tallys would absolutely dominate as Chef and Sous-Chef. They're both the most skilled cooks among this group and the most experienced in the kitchen, so it's not even a fair contest, lol. Ayla is decent enough that you could point her at something and tell her to prep/chop and she wouldn't mess anything up too badly, so yeah, this team is definitely taking first place!

Group 4 would probably take second! Chase doesn't cook at all but is physically capable of lending those skills if directed, Red is fairly good in the kitchen and can whip up straightforward but tasty meals, and Briony has good culinary sense and can make things taste good but is also very clumsy in the kitchen, so it kind of shakes out to be decent if Red takes the lead and tells the other two what to do! Chase's complete lack of experience in the kitchen but his lack of clumsiness balances out Briony's culinary sense but disastrous 'bull-in-a-china-shop' flusteredness, so I think they could turn out something nice! If Group 1 turned out something on the level of a hamachi crudo with cucumber foam and herbs, Group 2 could turn out something on the level of spaghetti bolognese with garlic bread and salad, if that makes any sense!

Group 3: ...Riel's never stepped foot in a kitchen in his life, so this is already off to an extremely rocky start. He mentally knows what ingredients goes in things and can tell you about the science behind the maillard reaction, but he utterly lacks any sort of culinary instincts like "*taste* that needs more oregano" or "this meat is rare so I should turn the fire up 100 degrees to cook it faster... right" and vastly overthinks things, so he's a disaster in the kitchen. Blade is like........ so-so, he's mostly used to cooking on campfires and eating like..... military rations or fuckin deer jerky or whatever, so while he can cook, his sense of taste never really developed beyond "is this nutritional and will it make me full", so he certainly shouldn't be taking the lead on this. And Shery has the most experience in the kitchen, but is primarily a baker, not a cook, and is also too timid to take the necessary role of leadership that comes with being head chef, so this group is kind of a mess! If they're allowed to bake, they do decently well and churn out, like, a dense, overbeaten cake that only has a little bit of egg shell in it, but if they have to cook a dinner dish, they got by on a grilled, de-boned fish (Blade) that was slightly under-seasoned with a soup (Shery) and a salad (Riel).

Group 4 is in dead last lol. Mimir was always going to be the least helpful in a competition like this, but pair that with Lavinet's utter lack of function in a kitchen (she's a little better than Riel in that she was more involved with planning food for social functions, so she at least has some sense) and Trouble's rather chaotic leadership style of just BAWLING orders at people and you're just destined for failure. Trouble on his own is actually a good cook if he's cooking for 1 or 2 people: he can cook a mean steak and potatoes kind of meal, but trying to do anything more complex than that while having Mimir and Lavinet paralyzed with inexperience is not a good recipe (ha), plus I'm pretty sure he and Lavinet would fight. 😂 So they're probably offering up a burnt steak (Trouble) with the most clumsy, under-cooked, under-seasoned, weirdly-shaped potatoes you've ever seen in your life (Lavinet; Mimir sat at the table and nibbled on things).

[justahopelessssromantic]

You Make it Feel Like Christmas

Here's my contribution to @notroosterbradshaw #hello december playlist challenge ispired by the song You Make it Feel Like Christmas by Gwen Stefani. This is just pure fluff Christmas fun. I'm so thankful I was able to come out of a little writers block and get this done! I hope you all enjoy 💖 Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates!

Pairing: Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x FemReader

Warnings: Pure Christmas Fluff

I want to thank the storm that brought the snow

The view outside the large picturesque window of the Seresin family cabin looked as if the place sat in the middle of a snow globe that had just been forcefully shaken. The flakes falling were beautiful, fluffy things falling down magically as if specially just for you.

Jake watched you from the living room sofa. Your face was so in awe of the winter wonderland before you. You couldn't look away. He however couldn't take his eyes off of you. Jake had been so in awe of you since that first day together after your deal. It was like a switch had been flipped for him from just friends to something more.

What brought you to Jake's family cabin started as an agreement between the two of you just mere months before at the Hardeck. What was supposed to be an effortless plan now turned into something much more for Jake. The deal was simple: both of you were single this year, him more miserably so than he'd care to admit after his latest breakup, and together would spend the holiday season as a pair this year so you wouldn't have to do any of the events of the season alone. Sort of like a Holidate is how you explained it to him from a movie you had seen on Netflix. You gave him the rundown on the rules and it sounded foolproof enough. Instead of spending the holiday alone you'd be each other's dates. No strings attached. Simple, right?

You then made him come over to your place and watch it with you so he'd grasp the rules of the arrangement better. If you were one thing it was thorough. He ended up enjoying the movie a lot but he wasn't going to let you know that.

"So after all this is over we're going to profess our love for one another?" He had asked. "What about the no strings attached part?"

"Well obviously that part we just disregard. It's just a movie, Jake." You waved him off with a hand. "Plus there is no chance in hell that I would ever fall for you."

Jake chuckled, settling deeper into his spot on your sofa. "Well good because I wouldn't fall for you either and I'd hate for things to get awkward after I'd have to let you down gently."

"Great, then it sounds like we have a deal."

But as the days went by with him spending more and more time with you he had fallen and fallen hard. And now there were all sorts of messy tangled strings everywhere and he had no idea how he was going to untangle the mess he had made.

Sweet gingerbread made with molasses

My heart skipped and I reacted

First on the agenda was your family's annual Christmas party where you'd exchange gifts and cookies over a delicious meal your grandma would make. So in preparation the two of you had to make two different kinds of cookies, four dozen each plus of course extras to give to the rest of the team.

You had your recipe book out reading the ingredients off to Jake as he set out everything that was needed for the sweet treats. The two of you would take turns reading the instructions while the other did the work until you had the dough perfectly set up.

You began rolling the dough into perfect little balls as you recited Elf, which you had turned on to watch as you baked, word for word. Jake of course made fun of you for it but you paid him no mind.

"The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear." You reminded him before joining along with Buddy the Elf. "I'm in a store and I'm singing" You belted out with him before receiving a face full of flour leaving you speechless.

"I'm so sorry," Jake did his best to keep his laughs in but it just wasn't working, "but I just had to stop that atrocity somehow."

You stared at him unblinking for what felt like forever. Jake began to sweat a little thinking his little prank had severely backfired and he'd be facing your full rage any moment now.

You raised your hand and he was preparing for a slap when smack there was the cold crack before the gooey contents of the egg you had snuck into your hand were now sliding down the side of his face.

"Oh it's on now."

Maybe ten minutes later the two of you sat on the kitchen floor amongst your mess exhausted from the food fight and laughter. Jake pulled a piece of shell out of his hair. "Lucky for me I heard raw egg is eggcelent for your hair."

You rolled your eyes at him. "You did not seriously just say eggcelent." You snorted with your laughter.

It was then that his heart skipped a beat.

Thought I was done for, thought that love had died

But you came along, I swear you saved my life

The drive up to the Seresin family cabin was a quiet one. Jake was too lost in his own thoughts while you slept peacefully in the passenger seat of his truck. He didn't know what he was going to do. He didn't want to ruin the incredible friendship he had with you.

He wasn't expecting to fall in love. He didn't think he'd feel it again after the last heartbreak but man he couldn't be happier or more terrified.

He decided he was going to tell you even if it didn't turn out as he had hoped. He just had to make sure you knew how he felt and that you saved his life.

Now it was the night before Christmas. You had just finished helping Jake and his mother clean up after dinner. You told her to go relax and you would handle the rest which Jake stayed behind to help you out. It was rather peaceful as he washed and you dried in harmonious silence. You had come to love his presence. It just felt natural at this point.

You finished up and both headed out to join everyone out on the deck for some hot cocoa under the stars. Everyone was staring at the two of you now where you had stopped.

"Look who is under the mistletoe!" Jake's mother pointed out to the two of you.

You looked up and sure enough someone had planted the mistletoe right where the two of you stood.

"You know what that means…" She encouraged the two of you. She was most certainly your biggest fan.

Put on the spot you didn't really feel like you had much choice here. Not that you really minded. You turned to Jake who was staring at you now trying to read his reaction to your predicament.

Now was his chance to say something. He opened his mouth to speak and suddenly all the words were stuck. He couldn't even get one word out. He was certain he looked like an idiot standing there. It felt like that moment was never ending, the two of you stuck frozen in time just staring at one another.

You decided to take charge making the first move. "Are you going to just stand there staring at me Jake or are you going to close the pretty little mouth of yours and kiss me already?"

You caught him off guard but thankfully he recovered quickly. You didn't have to tell him twice.

He swept you up in what most certainly could be described as the best kiss you had ever experienced simply taking your breath away before you parted.

His family's cheering was muffled around you. All your focus was on him who was grinning like an idiot mirroring your own expression as you held each other there.

"So much for never falling for me." He gloated.

"Oh shut up, you fell for me first."

I never thought I'd find a love like this

But I found forever in that very first kiss

✨You make it feel like Christmas✨

[sldlovescartoons]

Summary: Essek has been exploring his personality since he's gone into semi-hiding. Including his feminine side, which spiral into him orchestrating a feast of sorts while The Nein and company are vacationing in Rumplcusp with the help of Jester, Yasha, and Veth. Fluffy fun. R&R!

Dark elf societies are highly matriarchal and thusly built many of it’s standards and customs around what Essek understands to be the more stereotypically feminine. Long hair, lots of jewelry and accessorizing, makeup were pretty standard unless you were poor. In a drow culture to be powerful is to be at least slightly feminine. So of course, from the time he started forming his own ideas, which is to say very young, he’d been rather prone to embracing his masculinity. He refused to wear the dresses gifted to him by suitors from other dens (very gender neutral gowns, normally), he cut his hair short as soon as he thought he could get away with it, he never had more than two piercings in each ear. His mother once said he looked like a poor harlot, but she also said it made him seem very threatening so it was more of a backhanded compliment than anything else. It was just one way for him to rebel, he’d been realizing. The one head of short hair in a court of long hair in complex styles, it’s like he was symbolically waving a flag that screamed ‘I’m a giant heretic’.

Point being, since his decision to go on the run and all the reflection that comes with it, Essek has been indulging his feminine side. He’s been growing his hair out, he’s been crafting and learning to bake with Yasha, and he was even considering getting another piercing to hang some sort of statement piece representative of the Caleb or The Nein! But right now, he was planning his biggest move yet.

In Essek’s experience, one of the ways women provided was by having and commanding the best hunters to get the best food for their Den. If they were of a particularly feminine sort, they might run the kitchen alongside the head chef and likely had a few recipes only they know. He wanted to play with this particular providing instinct, but he had no hunters or hunting abilities, and the only chefs he had ready access to were the cats in the tower. So, the drow went to get advice from one of his best friends, hoping that she might help him figure something out to help him while they were all vacationing together on Rumblecusp. 

“Awh, you want to make Caleb a nice meal like a cute little house wife, that’s so sweet! I don’t think the cats know how cook anything that we’d catch here, but I’m sure we can use the kitchen in the towers to do something super awesome, we can ask Yasha for help, she’s like, super knowledgeable about weird ingredients, Essek. She’d maybe help hunt, to!!!”

He regretted everything. He wanted to throw himself in a black hole, he’d made a mistake.

“I did not say- I said I wanted to indulge in providing instincts-” The dark elf felt his ears trying to flick back in agitation and was barely able to stop them as he felt his face warm. He took a deep breath. “So you’ll help me?”

“Of course! I know lots and lots of places to look, plus I could ask Artie if he knows anyplace- But, really really, we should get Yasha! This is totally her thing, you know. Don’t worry, Essek, we'll hunt down a beasty and help you make a nice tasty meal for everybody to impress your boyfriend.” The little blue tiefling wiggled, grinned, and her eyes sparkled with excitement. 

“Partner, Jester, Caleb is my partner, we aren’t in primary school.” Boyfriend just sounded so juvenile to him. He was a powerful wizard of noble blood, formally of high station, he was over 120 years old, he didn’t have boyfriends, he had partners. 

“Whatever.” Jester waved the complaint away. “Okay, be ready early in the morning tomorrow, I’ll handle everything.”

And off she went.

Well, it was too late now, this was going to happen.

###################################################################

He hated hunting, he hated it so much. He hated it when his father took Verin and him out on a hunt as a rite of passage for male drow, and he hated it now, but at least he had help and at least it was over now. They even had a decent haul of ingredients to work with! Thankfully on their last Aeor trip Caleb taught him how to perform The Amber Vault, so they were able to pack up any meat they gathered while it was fresh. They’d managed to gather some fruits and veggies, and now they just had to get into the kitchen and practice. Experimentation and iteration were a lot more in his comfort zone, so he was eager to get in the kitchen where he’d deserve it more when Yasha and Jester teased him. He’s a grown elven man, he should know how to cook more than he does, but a hunter he is not and it is frankly unfair how much he’s been made fun of today. Essek was also, frankly, excited to see what they could do with what all they caught, which was a lot. Because they didn’t know what would work and cooking a meal in this case means cooking for eleven people because Molly and Caduceus were both here and Veth brought her husband and child.

Rumblecusp was truly a wonder, it’s bizarre magical history meant they could find something from anywhere if they really wanted to, and they did. Provided nothing goes horribly wrong, he was going to provide a feast of exotic meats and fruits that would make his mother eat her fucking headdress. 

  Case and point, and the one the drow was most eager to use: They have dinosaur meat! He wasn’t familiar, but Jester called it a Stegosaurus. They’d taken the legs, a large part of the tail, and part of it’s small intestine (Yasha had insisted on that, he did not know why and it scared him). They’d also killed and vaulted a large pill bug, a bird the size of a large dog, and some strange, big mollusks they’d dived for. This had all the making of a great experiment, at the very least. 

They entered the kitchen unbothered, the others out on the beach and Caleb up in his study/lab coming up with his lesson plans for after Spring Break. But, when the lights in the kitchen magically flicked on as they entered, Veth has sitting on a countertop, one leg crossed over a knee, waiting, like a villain in dramatic stage play, effectively scaring the hell out of him, which Essek is sure was the goal. 

  “Y’all planning a fancy meal?” The halfling rose a brow in silent judgement, triggering Essek’s flight or flight reflex on account of his ‘mommy issues’.

“Were you spying on us?” Essek responded defensively, even though there was nothing to defend, because they weren’t doing anything wrong but some animal part of the drow’s mind swore they were.

“No, my kid was spying on you and told me what he saw.”

Fucksake.

  “Pffttt, don’t worry, Veth, we aren’t doing anything sneaky shady, Essek just wanted to surprise Caleb with a nice dinner for everyone. Isn’t that so sweet, we just had to help him, he’d die in the forest by himself.” Jester answered before he could respond at all. That seemed like a gross simplification of the original intent, but it did seem to be the thing that was happening now regardless.

“You weren’t planning on hoarding the goods for yourself?”

“Wh- no, I wouldn’t- No!” Essek wasn’t babbling and nobody could prove that he was. 

“Well, why didn’t you ask for my help?” Because she didn’t like him and he values remaining unshot? “I’m a former goblin and a sort of homemaker, my knowledge is invaluable here. Good thing I caught you, I’m here to help, Luc said you killed some sort of dinosaur? T-rex Steaks again?”

Yasha was put incharge of butchering the hunts, besides the Pill Bug and Mollusks, which were sealed back away quickly so they wouldn’t sour. Pill Bug was close enough to shellfish to warrant it, he knew that much. That left the rest of them to safety and taste test the scavengings as well as meal plan. The onion-type things they found were safe, but more savory tasting than a regular onion. A fruit that Jester said resembled something called a plantain made his skin tingle when they were doing the pre-tasting skin test but was fine besides that and tasted a bizarre taste between sweet and sour. All the various herbs they’d been deemed safe and identified or given an equivalent identification, but one of the two mushrooms they found were definitely poisonous and Essek was very embarrassed as someone who’s diet was so mushroom heavy most of his life that he’d somehow missed that in the initial finding. There were several fruits that they all seemed to recognize on sight and thus didn’t need to be tested for safety, but he was made to taste for meal planning purposes.

“So, what do you want to do with the Stego, Floaty?” Veth asked him, looking at him like he should have an answer, and he definitely should have one of those, shouldn’t he?

“I’m not sure- I don’t know it’s taste or texture to plan, but it should be like a Giant Lizard, should it not?” The elf was pretty sure he knew some lizard dishes. Sort of between chicken and pork, but with a slightly grainy texture. “We don’t have time to make a stock with the tail, but maybe it would roast well?”

“Maybe for the littler bit at the end of the bit you all took, but what about the rest?” The halfling said pointing to the large tail Yasha was currently skinning with her broadsword when there was a butcher’s block of carving knives right behind her. The cat that Essek recognizes as being in charge of the kitchen was having some sort of feline conniption directly behind her as the sight of a sword being at the use in his kitchen. Caleb would be hearing from the Cat Union, there was no doubt about it. 

“Oh, Oh, I know! Stego appetizers! Stego-tizers! We could chop up the good part of the tail and fry them up chicken tender style, with lots of dipping sauces.” Jester was practically vibrating with excitement at her idea, but Essek’s nose crinkled a bit at the thought.

“Stegosaurus Tenders? That sounds rather…” Don’t say childish, don’t say childish, don’t say childish- ”Undignified?” He didn’t know if that was better or worse.

“It also sounds fucking delicous, we should do it.”

“Oh, but this is Essek’s dinner…” The blue tiefling visibly deflated and Essek wanted to throw himself into the ocean. “I don’t want to step on his thing TOO much.”

“It’s fine, it’s a fine idea, we have lots of food to work with to try for more refined dishes.” He said, folding under the force of disappointing Jester like a wet paper bag. “Besides, this group is such an eclectic collection of peoples, it might be thematically appropriate for this impromptu feast to have a… variety of dishes. Both of type and refinement.” 

“Really?” The sparkle was back in her eyes, and when he nodded his consent she sprung forward and hugged him. “Thank you, Essek! I have even more fun suggestions, if you like that one, but mostly for the deserts-”

His spine definitely cracked with the hug, but he couldn’t deny her the affection. It would be like denying a cloud it’s ability to rain.

“Do we want to go ahead and do the stego-tizers as an early snack sort of thing? Since the rest could take a while and we have so much stuff here.”

“A great idea, Veth, Jester, could I trust you to make a list of sauces? You’re from money, you’re traveled, I’m sure that you could figure out some wonderful dipping sauces.” Part of running a household was effectively using and directing the staff, this was sort of like that. His mother and all his aunts of varying degrees of relation ran the den like a fine tuned machine. He gave the blue tiefling what Caleb called his ‘pretty boy smile’, hoping to convince her of this task so he can keep focus on the tasks at hand. 

“Yes, I tooottally can, I can make them match that theme thing you were talking about! Different places, different sauces! Eclectic! Yeah!” Jester’s tail lashed sound like an excited dog as she whisked herself away to start writing down her ideas.

“Okay, so now that she’s over there, what do you want to do with the rest of your haul? Yasha told me about this stuffed pillbug recipe once, do we want to do a play on that?” Veth said, absolutely locking in. She was a short, murderous angel. No wonder Caleb is so fond of her.

“Yes, I know of a few Pillbug recipes myself, in passing, so that should be very doable.” The halfling’s strangely steady presence bolstered Essek’s resolve and made is easier for him to press forward with confidence and try to stir the situation himself. “We should also have the cats bring out lots of rice, noodles, staple vegetables and the like, since most of these can’t stand on their own. Also, do you think we pull off a rice pudding with those exotic fruits?”

“We have magic, we can do anything.” Not actually an answer, but good enough!

When it was just him and Veth it was surprisingly easy to get the menu ironed out in time to start making the Stego-tenders. Well, Yasha and Veth handled the actual tenders because he found the meat slimy and gross to touch, Essek was helping Jester make dipping sauces. 

“Okay, so, this fruit here sort of reminds me of a tomato, so we are definitely making a Rumblecusp version of that one sauce that I forgot the name of that we had when we were chilling in the Dynasty. It definitely had like ketchup or something like it at the base, so yeah.” Jester rattled off, sitting a bowl and a pestle down in front of him. “While you guy were yap yap yapping, I went ahead and cooked these, you are welcome, so you just need to mash these up with some vinegar, that brown type of sugar or maybe some honey I don’t know it’s your dinner, some lemon juice, until it’s aaaallllllllll smooth. We’ll go from there, okay? I’m going to do the sweetie mustard, yell for me when you are done.”

The little blue tiefling had said so many things so fast, but he was versed enough in Jester-ese to understand the mission at hand. Improv some island ketchup while she made honey mustard. He could do this. Essek plucked the barely not steaming any longer fruit-berry-vegetable thing that they found that was pretty much a purple tomato and started dropping them in and mashing them a bit before adding another. After there seemed to be enough there for the amount of sauce they need he just started to grind away with the pestle. It reminded him of hand making ink in his youth as a part of his magic education, or any alchemy adjacent work he’d done over the years, for that matter. It was sort of soothing, if he was being really honest. He added a healthy squirt of honey, along with the vinegar and lime and soon he seemed to have some janky purple ketchup on his hands.

“Okay, now what?” Wait, he was supposed to be in charge here, he was running this kitchen. He tries again trying to sound less like a child asking their mother for assistance. “I need to know the next steps.”

“Alright, so now just grate up those.” Jester said, looking up from her stirring to point at the ginger and garlic on the counter. “And then add it in with some of the dark sugar, the soy sauce and- Oh, there’s the wine! Thank you, Gretchen, for the wine, you’re doing so good.” The mentioned cat sat a bottle of sweet xhorasian wine down on the counter as she got to it on the list. “Just a bit of those, for flavor, I think will probably get the flavor close.”

“Alright.” It didn’t take long to get the ingredients prepped and in the bowl to keep pestling until smooth-ish. Towards the end of his pestling, the blue tiefling’s unique cadence busted through into his attention.

“We should try to do a sweet and spicy sauce. The cats can get us some peppers from the back, but what fruit should we use for the sweet part?” She asked, picking up and sniffing some of their scavenged fruits as well the ones the cats had already brought out, like smelling could give her the answers that she seeked. This an opportunity to assert his authority as the kitchen head.

“I propose that we cook and mash the flesh of the fruits to see what their consistency is like and what it does to the flavor, and we can go from there.” 

“You are so smart, Essek! I will start to prep the fruits, then.” Jester said, whipping out a knife that Essek was choosing to not think about the size of. 

Alright, they were on… a track. This was going to work.

########################################################################

Essek decided he was going to bring Caleb’s late lunch to him himself. He could use a break from the kitchen (and all of Jester’s innuendo), and some food himself. Plus, the other wizard might need help with his lesson plans and grading and the ladies had already dispensed food to the others and started on the stegosaurus and bird roasts that they had planned, so he had time. In his hands was a platter of Stego Tenders (he wished he’d come up with a more refined name before that one had stuck) with four different dippings. Island Honey Mustard, Purple Xhorsauce, Green Sweet and Spicy, and some sort of thick dip Jester had made that had mushrooms and who knows what else in it. It was orange-ish, lumpy and tasted earthy but also sweet with a little zest. He didn’t know, it was ugly, but it tasted good. The Tenders themselves were a gorgeous golden brown that had taken probably too many tries to nail down if he was fully honest with himself.

“Good afternoon, Professor, would you care for a spot of lunch?” The drow half crooned as he walked up to his partner from his position hunched over papers at his lab table. His rusty red, gray streaked hair starting to escape the hastily made loose ponytail his hair was in to fall in his face. Good money would say that he was working on his lesson plans.

“Hm? Ja, yes, I would. A bit of a late lunch, but I appreciate it.” It seemed to take a second for Caleb to fully enter the moment, a testament to the degree to which he dives into his work. Blue eyes settle on the platter in his hands. 

“Fried foods? How surprising.” 

“It’s Stegosaurus tail.” Essek said with barely contained excitement at being able to serve his partner such exotic meat, gesturing at the table with the platter to hint at where it should sit. Caleb started to clear the spot.

“Dinosaur meat? My, you have been busy today, haven’t you?” Eyes gleamed at him in curiosity, asking without any words what he was up to.

“You have no idea. I think you’re going to be very pleased with dinner tonight, let's just say that much.” He sat the platter down on the cleared spot, promptly sitting himself down right after.

“Does this have anything to do with why Jester and Yasha were MIA this morning?” 

“A proper den leader uses only the best hunters.”

“But you didn’t bring Veth along?”

“You know she doesn’t like me.”

“But she does enjoy killing things.”

“Yes, and I am a thing.” The drow lets out a violent puff from his nostrils. “Anyway, as an opening prelude to the wonderful meal I’ve planned, we decided to make these Stego-Tenders, with four handmade sauces. Let’s enjoy this, shall we?”

“Ja, of course, why don’t you tell me about these sauces for the… Stego-Tenders?” Ah there was that annoying Teasing Eye Sparkle. The bastard.

“A good den head designates tasks to those most capable, Jester seemed a good fit for naming dishes.” He gave up as an explanation to a question that hadn’t been asked, but Caleb saw right through him and let out a snort of laughter that was unattractive but very endearing, because the human is just insufferable like that sometimes. “First, the Purple Xhorsauce- Jester.” The drow said in explanation at the open joy and mockery that had started to bloom across his partner’s face.

As Caleb laughed at him anyway, he plucked up a tender and dunked it in the purple sauce. The sauce turned out shinier and thinner than he’d ever imagined when he’d when he’d originally been handed those steaming island tomatoes. The sauce was such a homey color, too. He took a bite and was absolutely delighted. The crust had turned out crisp and so to his joy, Stegosaurus tail rather did taste like Giant Lizard! He found himself looking even more forward to the other dino dishes they had planned, since they’d been sort of planned around his own descriptions of lizard based dishes he’d had back in the Dynasty. The sauce also tasted remarkably like home, and so this particular bite was reminding him starkly of festival foods that he’d been considered generally too high class to have more than a handful of times. Like something you’d buy from a stand, but more refined.

“That good, Schatz?” Caleb teased, looking at his ears, which he’d been too in his head to notice were doing little happy flutters that he promptly stopped. “Don’t stop, it’s cute.”

“It’s undignified for a man of my age.” Essek grumbled, displeased that he’d lost control of his ears like a young child. Being Seen was so mortifying, really. The drow dipped the tender in the sauce and shoved it towards the other’s face. “Try it, it’s very good.” And he did.

“Oh.” Caleb said, a bit of food still in his mouth like the heathen he was, after a bit of chewing. “That is good.” 

“Of course it is, I made it, why would it be anything less than wonderful.” The drow felt like he was puffing himself up like a proud bird, but he deserved it after getting roasted by his friends all day, damnit. 

“Of course, silly of me to be surprised.” The ginger rolled his eyes before picking up his own tender and pointing towards another sauce. “What's that one? It looks familiar.”

“Oh, Jester made that one especially for you, she called it Island Honey Mustard.” Essek answered and Caleb’s eyes gleamed with a sort of subtle joy that normally happened when one of his friends did something sweet.

“Why with the Island tag?” He asked as he dipped his tender in the yellow sauce with the drow quickly behind them.

“I think to sweeten it she used both honey and some sort of island fruit juice.” It was all the answer he had until he took a bite and surely, along with meat juices, mustard and honey, a subtle fruity undertone coated his tongue. It was… unique, to say the least. “Hm.”

“That is… interesting. It tastes like a vacation home feels.” Caleb muttered with furrowed brows, like he was trying to decide if that was a good thing or not. That also would have been a nonsense sentence if he’d said it to anyone but him, but he understood well enough. The red head took another, smaller dip. Thought on it. “This one is probably my favorite.”

“Surely, you zemnians love mustard.” Caleb glared lightly but couldn’t summon up a real retort because they both knew he favored mustard and mustard seed for flavoring in his cooking. “Now, onto the next one, it’s got a bit of a kick to it.”

The other wizard reacted as dramatically to the Green Sweet and Spicy Sauce, or Swicy Sauce as Jester called it. The ginger was famously bad at handling true spice of any kind, so even getting a mouthful of the rather mild sauce made Caleb start to go red in the face whine, going into his normal theatrics. After Essek had stopped laughing at him, they moved onto the Orange Mushroom Sauce, which he’d personally loved but Caleb was rather undecided on. After sampling all the sauces they slipped easily into their typical lunch routine, as the drow asked about the lesson plans he was working on and the other wizard had started to eagerly jump into explaining how he was trying to formulate the plans for Advanced Transmutation 302. He relished in the opportunity to eat exotic junk food and ramble about academics with his partner, as he knew that his day was likely going to get chaotic when he returned to the making and serving of his feast. 

[haikyuufanficwriting]

Chapter 6: Bokuto

Prompt: Reader and (Character) burning something Character: Bokouto _____________

You would consider yourself to be pretty good at somethings. Everyone has certain skills that they can do at levels to evoke envy in others. Sadly, for you, cooking was not one of them.

“(Nnnnaamme), I’m hungry.” You hear your one of your best friends, Bokouto, whine as he enters your room. Being that he is one of your closest friends, he’s made it a habit to show up to your house unannounced after he finishes his practices. Not that you had minded, in fact your night almost felt empty without him showing up at random times.

“Good evening to you too.” You say, not evening looking up from the book you were currently studying from. Bokouto mumbles a reply before throwing his stuff into a random corner of the room and falls on your bed dramatically. “I’m still hungry.” You sigh lightly.

“Didn’t you and Akaashi go to the convivence store and get food?”

“Well, yeah. But I forgot my second lunch at home today.” Bokouto groans, rubbing his stomach like he hasn’t eaten in almost two weeks. You can’t help but roll your eyes are his antics. “If you want, we have leftovers in the fridge. My parents aren’t coming home till late so that’s your best bet.” You hear him huff like a child. “Leftovers never taste as good.” You just shrug.

“Well, I guess you’ll just have to starve then.” Bokouto tsks as you go back to your book. Its quiet for awhile, and you savour the last moments of silence until the captain gasps excitedly, rising off your bed with a new surge of adrenaline. You turn to see an expression on his face that leaves you filled with dread.

He had an idea.

From your experiences, Bokouto’s ideas always were quite… ambitious. From attempting to spike blindfolded, to climbing random fences just because Kohona challenged him to. But that wasn’t the only problem. Due to his personality, he always went into them with full confidence, so sure that he could anything he set his mind to. And while it was something you and many others admired; it did have its downsides.

Like now.

“(Name)! Let’s make something!” You close your book, subconsciously knowing that any plans of studying were thrown out the window. “Are you kidding?” The hesitance is practically dripping from your voice, but it doesn’t deter him. But then again, it never did. He gives you a wide smile.

“Why not? We could make those big fluffy pancakes! Akaashi makes them all the time when we’re studying! They always taste amazing!” You give him a tired expression. You never knew how Akaashi handles him; even if he is his boyfriend.

“Maybe that’s because he knows how to cook, Bokouto. I don’t know how to cook.”

“I’ll be there to help out too!” He gives you a confident grin.

“Bokouto, you don’t know how to cook either.” You deadpan. He tsks at your negativity. “Could you go along with me for just once? I mean its pancakes; how hard could it be? Plus, it’s just following instructions.” Your shoulders slug at that. He did have a point; pancakes did sound easy, but…

“I don’t know Bo-” Your cut off by a hand grabbing your arm.

“I just found a recipe online! C’mon!” Bokouto eithers ignores your disapproval, or doesn’t hear you, as he practically drags you to your kitchen. He then proceeds to pick out and pull the ingredients necessary onto your counter. At this point, you realized that he just wasn’t going to listen, so you decided to bite the bullet and just go along with him. You rationalize this clearly stupid idea with the fact you’ll be eating pancakes, so it wouldn’t be that bad.

“(Name), what’s the difference between baking powder and baking soda? Because you only have baking soda.” You pause. “Umm… I think my parents told me once… But I don’t really remember…”

Bokouto only shrugs. “If they have similar names, they must be the similar. I’m sure it won’t be a problem.” You feel something deep in your soul telling you that this logic is extremely flawed, but you can’t really think of anything better than his logic, so you just keep quiet. He sets the baking soda on the counter along with the other ten other things that are now crowding your poor kitchen. He looks to you eagerly. “Let’s get started! We’re going to make the world’s best pancakes!” You can only give him a half-hearted slightly nervous smile, as you tie up your hair, so it doesn’t get in the way.

“So, what’s the first step?” He looks to his phone for the instructions. “To separate egg yolks and whites. Then mix the yolks with sugar, then milk and the baking soda. It should make a smooth batter.” You nod, pulling out the eggs. Separating the eggs were fairly easy, you’d done it a million times when helping your parents in the kitchen. But in Bokouto’s case, he found it much more difficult than you did. The ace didn’t have the most delicate hands, so it was expected for every egg that he touched to have the yolk broken by him. Forcing him to meticulously pick out the yolks out of the whites.

Eventually after offering to do it all for him, you followed the rest of the instructions, substituting baking soda for baking powder. When finished you were left with a relatively smooth batter. Other than the fact that you mistakenly let Bokouto use the hand mixer on high, leaving a mess that you’re sure will take hours to clean, you felt quite proud if you were being honest. Having never made anything except eggs, so you felt like you did a good job. You could tell Bokouto felt that same.

“Alright! We’re halfway there!” His voice filled with pride. “It’s just the first step, Bo. We still have like four more.” You see him deflate a little, which does make you smile slightly to yourself. “F-fine! Then we’re halfway to being halfway there!” He gains himself quickly going to read the next instructions. “We just gotta whip the egg whites and sugar now.” You nod as you do so, with this time you using the hand mixer, learning from your previous mistake. Your arm starts to get tired as you beat it into a frothy mixture. You stop, letting your arm rest.

“How long am I supposed to beat this for?” He checks the instructions. “It says ‘till stiff peaks.” You raise a brow in question. “What does that even mean?” Bokouto doesn’t respond, scrolling through the website, obviously trying to find a clearer description, only finding nothing. “It doesn’t say…” He pauses before his eyes light up in the ‘I have an idea’ way as he starts calling someone.

“Bokouto, what are you doing?”

“Calling Akaashi. If anyone would know, it’s him.” You feel your eyes widen. “Bokouto, you can’t do that!”

“Why not? We need help!”

“You can’t just call people ten o’clock at night to ask them a question you could easily search-”

“… Bokouto-san?” Your cut off by a tired voice on the phone. You slap your forehead.

“Hey, Akaashi I need your help. Me and (Name) are making those pancakes you always make and we’re beating the egg white and sugar thing and the recipe says to beat until stiff peaks, but we don’t what that means.” You were mistaken. Now would be the time to slap your forehead.

“You mean you’re making the meringue? Stiff peaks means when you pull away it holds it shape.” Bokouto gives you a look of ‘I told you so’, and you reply with the extremely mature move of sticking your tongue out.

“Okay, thanks babe. Love you.” And with that he hangs up the phone. You look at him, completely mortified. “I can’t believe you just did that.” He only leans his head it the side in confusion, obviously seeing nothing wrong with it. You hold the bridge of your nose. “Never mind.” You mumble as you going to whip the mixture until it holds its shape just like Akaashi said it would.  Once finished you look to the ace for the next instructions.

“Now we just gotta put two and two together! Then we’re done!”

“We still have to cook it, Bo.” He gives you a semi-annoyed look. “You know what I mean.” You just shrug with a small smile on your face. He notices it immediately and nudges you slyly, playfulness in his eyes. “You’re having fun aren’t you?” You try to give a look of indifference, but he’s known you too long to know that its fake.

To be honest, you were having fun. With you two being in your last year of high school, and him and his club, plus him spending his time with Akaashi, you two rarely ever had any time other the couple hours you saw each other each week. And those times would just be him napping on your couch or you helping him study for a final that he’ll inevitably fail. Sure, you savoured all the time you could with him, but it’s been a long time since the two of you did something just for the heck of it.

And you missed it.

“Well, it’d be more fun if I knew that I didn’t have to clean up the mess we’ve made.” Bokouto looks bashful at that, and you let out a small laugh. You take his phone to look at the instructions more thoroughly. “Alright, it says to fold in the batter. So mix it gently.” He nods giving you a look of determination. You watch him mix the two mixtures with the upmost care, you could really tell that he didn’t want to mess it up, which makes sense considering that he wants to eat it.

Eventually the mixtures look mixed in fairly well, with no streaks and looking considerably lighter. You were getting more excited for the final result with each passing minute. You brought out your pan and ring molds for the final step. You turn to place them on the counter when you see your owl-like friend dip in his finger to taste the batter curiously.

“Hey, no!” You bat his hand away before he got the chance to touch it. Bokouto lets out a small noise of pain before rubbing his hand and pouting.

“That’s got raw eggs, you get sick from that!” You scold him, and he rolls his eyes. “But, (Name), I’m so hungry!” He pleads, and you can’t stop the sigh that escapes your throat. “You have the patience of a toddler, you know that?” He opens to his mouth to counter your claim, but only closes it in actualization that your right. You shake your head slightly and grab his phone once more.

“Okay, it says to leave on medium low heat, and to cover them with a towel to cook in the steam.” You motion for the towel on your counter, and Bokouto hands it to you, you throw it over your shoulder as you bring out a random pan and turn the heat onto medium low as instructed. Fortunately, you did have ring molds in your house, so it quite easy and clean to pout the batter into the pan, sprinkle a little water, and place the towel and cover on top.

“How long is it supposed to cook?”

“About five minutes.” You nod, looking around your kitchen. “I guess I could start cleaning up…” You start to take the extra dishes and appliances to the sink, washing the excess batter off them. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Bokouto pacing back and forth, eyeing the pan anxiously.

“Oi, staring at it isn’t going to cook them any faster. Come help with these dishes.” He keeps his eye on the pan while walking towards the sink, and you start giving him stuff to dry. Eventually, he stops focusing on it, and you two fall into a nice rhythm, washing and drying. Talking about anything that came to mind. School, volleyball, studies, Akaashi…

You two were so into it you almost forgot about the pancakes.

At least until you begin to smell smoke.

You turn curiously to the pan on the flame, only to freak out when the towel you set on top was half caught in fire.

“HOL-HOLY SHIT!” You brain turns to complete mush as all you can do it scream and point to the tiny fire. Your sudden panic causes Bokouto to fall into the same pattern of behaviour, basically letting out panicked hoots. You smack his arm.

“BOKOUTO PUT IT OUT!”

“WHAT?! WHY ME?!”

“I DON’T WANT TO BURN MYSELF!”

“AND I SHOULD?!”

“THIS WAS YOUR IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE!” Bokouto still makes no effort to move it, still yelling and panicking like an idiot. Seeing him actually gives you the courage to try and smother out the fire. Its like your mind finally decided to kick into gear and act. (In hindsight, its probably because you didn’t want your cause of death to be pancakes.) You take a deep breath and quickly take the pan off the stove and shove it under the sink, letting the cool water smother out the fire. You both quiet down as the smoke floats up from the pan, only being able to hear the water running down and both your heavy pants.

“You’re a wimp.” You finally say. But you don’t think Bokouto hears you. The look on his face is complete agony, as he stares down the ruined food.

“My-my… Pancakes…” He manages to say brokenly.  You look down at the pan as well, to see chard, mushes of batter.

Yeah… you really shouldn’t have expected anything. Cooking was never one of your strong suits.

You’ll just have to leave that one to Akaashi…

[hockeynoses]

'cause I’m bluffin’ with my muffin (Ste/ddie snzfic)

Summary: Steve’s got a really bad cold, but he promised he’d make some muffins for the Hellfire club meeting tomorrow. Things do not go as planned, and Eddie has to convince him to go back to bed.

Warnings: Contagion (Kind of, but not really. There’s a threat of it that does not actually happen). Mess. Like 2 instances of coughing. What else can I say? It’s gross!  I can’t even tell what’s gross anymore, honestly.

Rating: There is no funny business in this one.  2.6k.

Notes: This was partially inspired by @hitchhoney’s fic about Joyce and the bake sale. AND the lovely fic she wrote about Scoops Steve for my Anon request. 💖

The title is from Poker Face. I couldn’t resist. Plus I like that there’s a slight double meaning about like, denial, etc. 😆

---

Steve is puttering around their apartment, bored out of his skull. Eddie is still at work, but will be back in half an hour or so. He had told him to get some rest, and for the most part, Steve had done that. He could hardly do much else. This cold is kicking his ass, and he feels like shit. He’s been lying around all day, in the bed or on the couch, in his sweatpants and hoodie, going through tissue after tissue. He hates feeling unproductive and is fed up with it. He doesn’t want to waste anymore of the day.

When they’d had their last Hellfire meeting two weeks ago, he had promised the kids he’d make more blueberry muffins – one of the few recipes he could successfully replicate that his mom taught him. He had bought all the ingredients ahead of time, before he came down with the cold from hell.

He doesn’t even know if it’s a good idea to bake in his state. His sneezes are so strong and unpredictable that he barely manages to cover half the time when he’s at home. Part of him wonders if Eddie would even allow him to come this weekend. He could see the other man forcing him to stay home for his own good, and for the health of the others. Steve never joined in on the gameplay anyway, he would just watch, be on snack duty, and provide commentary every so often.

If Eddie is going to banish him from the club this weekend, the least he can do is still make the muffins so the kids won’t be disappointed. Determined now, he blows his nose in the hopes of clearing it out for a sustainable length of time, grabs the box of tissues he knows he’ll need, and brings it into the kitchen with him. He starts collecting ingredients from the pantry, setting them on the counter.

Before he can even get started, he has to turn and smother a harsh sneeze into his elbow. Frustrated, he grabs a tissue from the box he’d placed nearby. He’d had it under his arm all day, needing to carry it with him when he moved from room to room. Now, he presses the cotton to his streaming nose, giving a few soft blows and wiping up the clear liquid that was running down his cupid’s bow. Not for the first time that day, he wishes he felt less disgusting.

“Ogkay,” he says to himself, keeping the tissue held to his dripping nose, “I cad do this.” He gets out a mixing bowl and washes his hands in an attempt to keep things somewhat sanitary.

To his credit, he’s able to get the batter mixed together and poured into the muffin tin without incident, seemingly by sheer force of will.  He’s just about ready to throw them in the oven when he feels another tickle take hold deep in his sinuses, thankfully with enough warning for him to grab a tissue and cover. “ihhh-RIISSHHHHoo! Huh-GSSHHHHuu!

The tissue stays put around his nose, soaking through to his hands with the amount of gunk coming out. He pulls the kleenex back from his face, tethered by a mess of clear snot. Knowing that particular tissue wouldn’t be of any further use, he wipes it off as best he can and grabs another one, giving a loud, gurgling blow into it.

“Ughhh, fugk this cold. This is fugging biserable.  ha-ESSHHH! ISSHHH! ehh-TTIIISHHH! Ohhh by god,” he moans, so fucking frustrated and exhausted. He just wants to be back to normal and make some food for his friends, is that too much to ask?

He mops his face up with the full tissue, tossing it into the trash. He’s going to finish this if it kills him. All he has to do now is get it in the pan and throw it in the oven. Luckily, his nose gives him a break and behaves long enough for that to happen. Giving a sigh of relief, he hopes it’ll all be worth it. He doubts anyone will want to eat these anyway; he’s like a walking plague rat.

A feeling of accomplishment settles into him as he surveys the dirty dishes cluttering the kitchen counter, deciding where he should start with the clean-up process.

Just then, he hears Eddie’s keys jingle in the door. “Honey, I’m home!” he quips.

“Ind here!” Steve says, trying to sound as chipper and healthy as possible. Eddie steps into the main room and sees him in the kitchen.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” he asks, coming over to rub Steve’s back in a quick greeting.

Steve has to give a deep sniff before he responds, “Umb… pretty good.” He knuckles at his nose.

“Good enough to be baking, I see,” Eddie eyes the messy kitchen warily.

“Yeah, I told the kids I’d mbake the blueberry muffin’ds agaid, so…” he waves to the disastrous kitchen that he really needs to clean up. “I just pud theb in the oved.” He gives another productive sniff, wiping his nose on the back of his hand.

“Are you sure those are going to be safe to eat?” Eddie asks, pointedly looking at Steve’s pink, dripping nose.

“Of course! Why-heh – why wouldn’d they be-heee heh-RRSSSHAAH!” He manages to cover about half of the spray, catching it in the large oven mitt he was still wearing. Eddie eyes him with a quirked brow.

“Well, we’re definitely going to have to wash that now.”

“KSSSHH!” This time Steve muffles the sneeze by pressing the oven mitt completely over the lower half of his face. “Oobs…” He glances at Eddie and wipes up the bit of mess that escaped onto the thick fabric.

Eddie sighs. “That’s going straight in the hamper.” Steve nods in acquiescence. “I thought I told you to rest today. What are you doing out of bed?”

“I’b so tired of fugging staying in bed, and I just – ha-KISHHT! I wadted to mbake these. I’b tired of dot gedding anythigg done. Kk’RIISSSH!” This one captured in his cupped hand, which he then wipes on the leg of his sweatpants.

“Steve, no one’s expecting you to get a bunch of shit done when you’re sick,” Eddie says, walking over to him. “You’re allowed to rest.” He pulls him into a hug and Steve presses his face into the crook of his neck.

“I got bored… and I’m dot used to doigg dnothing,” he says, snuffling into Eddie’s skin.

“I know; You’re probably going stir-crazy by now,” says Eddie, cupping the back of his head. “Why don’t you go sit on the couch and I’ll make you some tea?  Did you have dinner yet?”

“I’b dot hungry,” he says petulantly, pulling up the collar of his shirt to cover a wet, “heh-AEESSSHOO!” Eddie looks at him in sympathy.

“Okay, Mr. Tough Guy, I’m still gonna make you eat. I’ll warm up some soup in a bit, but let me get you that tea first,” he says, shooing him off towards the couch.

“SNFF. Fin’d.” Steve heads to his favorite corner of the couch, wrapping himself in a throw blanket. A few minutes later, Eddie comes over with his tea, sitting next to him and handing him the warm mug.

“Your muffins smell good, at least. Hopefully they’re not infected with too many of your germs,” Eddie jokes.

“I can’d prombise anythigg,” Steve says, taking a sip of his tea. He loves that Eddie always puts honey in it for him. The steam tickles his nose, and before he knows it, he’s bracing himself for another round of sneezes, nose twitching irritably. Eddie hears his breath start to hitch and grabs some tissues from the box that he brought from the kitchen.

Seeing that Steve’s still holding his mug and won’t have time to put it down without spilling it, he says, “Here, let me,” and folds the bundle against Steve’s running nose.

Steve doesn’t have time to thank him, breath hitching and eyes fluttering shut. “hih…ah… ah’HEETCCCHHoo! hih’GKSHHHuh! Uh…huh…oh god… HIH’RESSSHHHah! Eddie holds the cotton firm against his face, feeling the mess seeping through the layers.

He eyes Steve and asks, “You done?”

“Uh huh…SNFF… I thigg so,” Steve answers, his eyes tired and heavy-lidded. Eddie mops up the mess still clinging to his nostrils and tosses the used wad away. “Thaggs. Snrk!”

“Anytime,” Eddie looks at him, eyes sparkling with amusement. They sit there chatting about Eddie’s day while Steve finishes his tea and waits for the timer to tick down to zero. Eventually it chimes, and he tosses the blanket off of him, saying, “I god id.”

He heads to the kitchen, grabbing a mismatched oven mitt to replace the one he contaminated earlier. He opens the oven and stands back to try and avoid the wave of heat that escapes. He leans in and takes the muffins out of the oven, turning to set them on the cooling rack. Unfortunately, the hot air from the oven tickles his overly-sensitive nose, as he’d feared.

He’s halfway to the cooling rack, both hands holding the hot pan, when a deep tickle rears its head. His breath starts to hitch- “N-no…uh…s-shit…dot dow…heh…HA’ESSSHHHUH! HA’RSSSHHOO!  KK’ZCHHCHH!” To his dismay and utter embarrassment, all three huge sneezes spray directly over and onto the freshly baked pan of blueberry muffins. “M-motherfucker! Ha-KSSSHHHah!”

He’s finally able to set the pan down on the rack, shaking the oven mitts off and turning away from the counter to sneeze into his hands, “hih-KSSSHTT! HEH’RIISSHO! ESSSH! Ha-ISSSHHah!” He pulls back and sees his hands covered in mess. Why was this his life?  He grabs a paper towel and hazards a glance at Eddie.

The other man is looking over from the couch, eyebrows raised in shock at the scene in front of him. He says, “I…cannot legally allow you to serve those to other people.”

“snrk! I kdow,” he says, resigned. “Sond of a bitch, I just-” he breaks off, interrupted by a barking, chesty cough that he smothers into his elbow. He’s bent over, dizzy with it. When he comes up for air, there are tears dusting his eyelashes and Eddie has hurried back into the kitchen.

“Hey, take it easy,” he says. “You look like you’re about to fall over.” Eddie brings him into his arms and Steve sags his weight against him.

He gives a wet-sounding sniffle, saying, “I do feel a little lightheaded.” He brings up his shirt to cover his face again. “heh-ITTCHH! Guh. I should probably eat, bud I dod’t have buch of an apped’ide.”

Eddie rubs his back and says, “Why don’t you go lay down, and I’ll heat us up some soup. We can have dinner in bed. It’ll be cute and not pathetic at all.” He pulls back and gives Steve a teasing smile.

“SNF! Ogkay,” Steve says, wiping his nose on the back of his hand.

“You gonna make it down the hall without me?” Eddie asks, half joking but also concerned after his display.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fin’d,” Steve says as he heads down towards their bedroom.

He’s laying in bed, face half mushed into the pillow when Eddie walks in holding two bowls.

“There you go, sire,” he says, handing Steve’s soup to him with a flourish. Steve sits up, accepting it gingerly, and Eddie joins him on the bed. “Chicken noodle, since I doubt you’d be willing to choke down anything else at this point.”

“Yeah, d’no, this is good.” He swallows a spoonful, the warm liquid soothing his scratchy throat. He eats slow, not wanting to upset his empty stomach.

Eddie keeps an eye on him, saying, “I want you to eat it all. You’ve gotta keep your strength up.” He gives Steve’s knee a little squeeze where it’s buried under the covers.

Steve manages to finish his bowl without any interruptions. Eating hot foods always makes his nose run, though, so by the time he sets his bowl on the nightstand his nose is streaming and there’s a fair amount of congestion built up. 

He grabs three tissues from the box next to him, knowing this is going to be messy, and takes a deep breath. He used to be too embarrassed to do this in front of Eddie, but now he knows the other man doesn’t mind. He blows his nose with a loud crackling sound, the shifting gunk in his head catching in his throat and causing a chesty, phlegmy cough to rattle out of him. While still in the throes of his coughing fit, his traitorous nose explodes with a “heh-ETSSSHHuh! Ha-AEETCCHHHoo!” The sneezes scrape against his throat, causing him to follow them with a couple lingering wet coughs into the destroyed tissue.

Eddie looks at him in sympathy while he stills and catches his breath after that horrendous bout. “Jesus, are you okay, babe?” he asks, rubbing Steve’s back.

Steve groans, saying, “Dno. I jusd wand this to be over. SNF!”

“I know,” Eddie says, frowning, hand warm on the back of Steve’s neck. “Give it a couple days and things will turn around.”

“ha-EETSSCCHH! Ugh. I’b choosing to believe you,” Steve’s tired eyes look at Eddie over the fresh clump of tissues covering his face.

“I think I’m going to make an executive decision and say I can’t let you come to Hellfire tomorrow,” he says, smoothing Steve’s hair back from his forehead. “I’ll have to make it up to you somehow.”

“snf. Dot your fault,” Steve says.

“I know, but I hate seeing you so miserable.”

“I’b just glad you’re here,” Steve says, feeling self-conscious yet grateful for all the attention.

“No place I’d rather be,” says Eddie, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

A while later, they’re settled in bed, Eddie’s sitting up, reading to him from the latest fantasy novel he’s intrenched in. Steve is laying down, his face snuggled into the side of Eddie’s hip. Things are quiet for a time, the soft lull of Eddie’s voice filling the air, interrupted every so often by a snuffle from Steve, muffled into his hip.

Then – “heh…ah…hih’ESSSHH! Hih’GSSHHuh! Hih-heh-” Eddie reaches over, grabbing him a tissue from the bedside table and handing it to him. “hih-KRSSH! Ha-gkXXT! Ugh. Thaggs.” He starts to blow his nose, the thick congestion halfway cleared when it’s forced out by another, “huh-GSSHHHEH! snRK. Sorry,” he says to Eddie, wiping some spray off his sweatpants.

Eddie reaches down to scratch his fingers through his hair, “Nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart.”

Steve gives another clogged sniff, nuzzling the bridge of his nose into the sliver of Eddie’s exposed skin between his shirt and the waistband of his pants. “Mmm. Keep reading.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“ha-ERSSHOO! snFF. Please?” Eddie just smiles at him and picks up where he left off.

 ---

The following night, at Hellfire club:

“I’m sorry to inform you all, but Steve the Snack-Bringer will not be joining us this eve,” Eddie says, entering the Wheeler’s basement, arms laden with his D&D supplies.

“Why not? Where is he?” Dustin asks.

“He’s sick as a dog,” Eddie explains, setting up his DM screen. “Got a really bad head cold.” He frowns for effect.

“Aw man! He was gonna bring us more of those muffins too,” Mike says.

“He tried,” says Eddie. “They were a biohazard by the time he was done with them. Trust me, I saved you from a world of pain.”

“Ew,” says Erica with a grimace.

“’Ew’ indeed,” Eddie laments. “Hopefully he’ll be back to normal for the next meeting. If he lets himself rest like he should.”

[maple-seed]

Thrown - Chapter 15: Earthen

Summary: Loki and Thor are perplexed by one of your studio practices. Loki attends a demonstration and does what he can to get on your nerves.

Word Count: 2,136

Author's Note: Guys, I don't know why but everybody spends this whole chapter talking about clay. I tried to get them to do something else, I really did. They insisted on the clay. If you can just bear with me, I promise in next week's chapter nobody mentions clay at all. Not even once.

Masterlist

Today was one of those days when Thor and Loki were destined to run into you. They were returning from the town and had just caught you in your field while moving between your buildings. Now they stood on the outside of your wall while you and your dog leaned on it from the inside. Thor was ruffling Ash's fur when he asked after your plans for the day.

"Just working, really. Gonna throw some stuff later but first I have to make clay." Thor exchanged a quick, perplexed look with Loki. "You have to make clay?" "Yeah. You know... for the pottery?" Thor rolled his eyes. "Yes, but it was my understanding that it was dug out of the earth." "Oh, true, it can be, and some people do use that stuff for pottery. But if you make it yourself you know you're getting the same thing every single time. It's more consistent. Plus it's cheaper to buy the ingredients in bulk, in the long run." "Fascinating." Thor turned to Loki. "She manufactures clay." "I'm not surprised." Loki responded blithely. "Humans are always complicating what should be simple." It was your turn to roll your eyes. "It's not complicated. Actually, I was about to get to it. I can give you boys a demonstration, if you want." You gestured toward your studio. "Ah, I'm afraid I do not have the time today." Thor answered regretfully. "My schedule is full." "I'd like to see it." Loki piped up. You looked slightly surprised. "Really?" "Yes, I'm interested to see how a human manifests earth." You laughed. "You guys are really making a much bigger deal out of this than it is." "You must tell me how it's done." Thor said to Loki, seemingly ignoring your remark. "I'll give you a full report on the machinations of a clay-maker when I return." Loki was moving to open the gate. "Okay guys, this is a little ridiculous. It's seriously not that interesting." "A full report." Loki said in a serious tone to a grinning Thor.

Thor bid the two of you goodbye as you led Loki across the grass to the back door of your studio, with Ash following behind. "Ash, bed." You pointed and the dog obediently walked to the cushion near your throwing wheel and laid down.

You brought Loki to the adjacent room he'd seen before, the one that held the deep sink and the machinery. He now saw that in addition to the machines and the sink, there were several shelves filled with sacks, boxes, and bins, and there was a second door in the back wall. All of this clutter made the room seem much smaller than it actually was.

You closed the door and handed him a small box. "Here, this one's brand new." Then you took something off a hook on the wall, which turned out to be a mask that you slipped on over your nose and mouth. Loki looked down at the box you handed him, it had the same type of mask inside. He at you skeptically. You slipped the mask down to speak. "What, are you going to tell me that gods don't have lungs?" "Well, certainly not frail ones like you mortals." "Wear the mask." You said firmly. "I'm not going be responsible for the first ever case of Asgardian Silicosis." You pulled your mask back into place and gave him a pointed stare until he put his mask on as well.

You pulled out a metal bucket from one of the shelves and set it on the floor. Your voice was muffled as you pointed to a piece of paper taped to the wall, it listed portions of ingredients. Loki recognized some of the words, like "feldspar" or "silica". However, he was certain that "grog" was not a real word. There were other papers taped to the wall, presumably recipes for other clays, they each had some strange name at the top. You moved around the room scooping various powders out of the bags and bins, checking their weights on a scale before dumping them into the bucket. You then handed Loki a flat wooden paddle and instructed him to mix the ingredients. At least, he was pretty certain that's what you asked, your voice was muffled. As he mixed you began filling a bucket with water in the sink, weighing it, and pouring it into the machine against the wall.

This machine had a deep round basin that came up to your waist, with metal arms inside. You poured the measured water into the basin then pulled out a plastic tub that he recognized. It was full of very wet clay, the items you had thrown but were rejected and tossed aside. He could see what looked like the remnants of a mug resting on the surface, slowly disintegrating. You took several handfuls of this clay and tossed it into the basin, closed the lid, and turned the machine on. The metal arms inside began rotating, mixing the contents. You took the bucket of dry materials from Loki and began slowly pouring it into the basin through an open grate on the lid. The mixture inside gradually became thicker.

Once the bucket was empty you motioned Loki to follow you out of the room, and you shut the door behind him. You pulled down your mask, and let it hang around your neck. "See? Not that big of a deal." Loki removed his mask as well. "Yes, and far more complicated than needed, as expected." "It's not complicated! You take some dry stuff and mix it with wet stuff!" "Your planet creates clay for you and rather than use that you've built a machine to combine the individual components of clay manually." "This clay is more specific. It's better for pottery." "We had plenty of fine pottery on Asgard with none of this foolishness." You rolled your eyes and began setting up your work station at your wheel. "Yes, I forgot how superior Asgard was." "Well, at least you're learning." You scoffed.

Loki leaned a shoulder against the wall. "Is that it, then?" "It has to mix for a few minutes then I'll take it out. Pretty much it, though." "A little anticlimactic." "I told you!" There was just the edge of playful frustration in your voice. "You made it all seem so mysterious and enigmatic." Loki held back a smirk as he teased. You shook your head contemptuously. "Yeah, well, that's basically it. You can go home now." "No, I must see it through to the end. I promised Thor a full report." Another eye roll as you continued setting up.

Several minutes had passed, your work station was ready. You pulled out a large plastic tub with a lid and carried it to the door for the clay room. Loki followed.

You turned to him with your hand on the doorknob. "Everything should be settled. You won't need your mask this time." "I doubt I needed it the first time." You waved dismissively. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

You opened the door and carried the plastic tub over the the machine which was still steadily churning its contents. You shut it off and lifted the lid. The basin was now filled with grey clay.

You reached in and tested the material. "Yep, looks good."

You set the tub on the floor, removed the lid, and opened a plastic bag inside it. Then you reached into the basin of the machine, removing large handfuls of clay and depositing them into the bin. You continued this process for some time, stretching and straining to reach all the clay in the basin, removing the portions stuck to the mixing arms, scraping the walls. This, Loki realized, must have been what you were doing the day he and Thor found you covered in clay. Between reaching into the machinery and unceremoniously dropping the clay into the tub, your arms and clothes were thoroughly muddied, with stray smears and flecks on your face and hair. Even Loki had to take a step back to remain clean.

Once the clay was cleared from the basin you twisted the plastic bag closed and sealed the lid on the tub. You then began dragging the tub across the floor and out into the main room. It made an awful scraping noise and Loki quickly picked up the other side to put an end to the sound. You gave him a strained thanks as the two of you carried the tub to the back of the main room. There were wooden shelves built into the wall holding similar bins. With a grunt you heaved the tub up onto a shelf, then you took a marker and wrote the name of the clay and today's date on a piece of tape stuck to the side of the bin.

You brushed your hands against one another, not that it did anything to clean them, and gave Loki a satisfied smile. "Ta-da. Done." "You aren't going to use the clay?" "Sure, eventually." You returned to your wheel at the front of the room and took a seat. "It has to age first. There's bacteria in the clay and as they grow and die the clay becomes more pliable. I kick-start it a little bit by adding old clay to the mix but you still want to wait at least six months before using it." "Interesting." Loki leaned against the wall while you began working clay on the wheel. "You're exploiting the labor of millions of creatures." "All in all, I think they probably get to live pretty good lives, for bacteria."

He watched as you transformed a lump of clay into a bowl. "Do you ever tire of the repetition?" You thought about it for a moment, eyes focused on the spinning clay in your hands. "No, not really. I find it soothing." He had a hard time disagreeing as he watched you work. You cut this bowl free and inspected it. "Anyway, even if it's the same motions it still feels different every time." You set the bowl aside and gathered a new portion of clay. "You never know what the clay's going to do. How it will react." He took a seat in the chair propping open the door, leaning back and stretching his legs out. "You speak of it as if it's alive." "It is." You stated firmly. "Weren't you listening? I just said so a minute ago." He chuckled. "Forgive me."

He watched you conjure another bowl out of nothing. And then another. He continued asking the occasional question and you seemed quite happy to answer. At some point a concern crossed his mind.

"Am I distracting you from your work?" You smiled without looking up from your current project. "No, not at all. Gerdy and I used to talk and throw. We'd pass hours that way." The second, unused wheel suddenly seemed much more prominent in the room. Had it always taken up so much space? "It's been nice to have company while working." Your voice snapped him back to the present. "If you ever want to learn to throw I'd be happy to teach you. I promise not to go all Ghost on you." His brows furrowed. "What do spirits have to do with pottery?" You laughed. "Oh. Right. Nevermind." Loki gathered that there was a joke he had missed. "I'm sorry to say that I can't stay much longer. We are helping Gillison move his family to new accommodations this afternoon." "That's alright. I've still got Ash for company." You glanced at the dog laying on his cushion. His tail thumped in response to his name being mentioned. "He doesn't seem like he's much for dialogue." Loki said. "Maybe, but he never disagrees with me, either."

There were several more minutes of conversation, you had questions about the move and how the construction had been going. Eventually, Loki stood. "Now I have to inform Thor of how greatly you misled us regarding the excitement of clay making." You threw a small lump of clay at him with surprising accuracy. He caught it easily, of course, but it still left him with clay on his hands. "Hah!" You said victoriously. "That was entirely uncalled for." He dropped the lump on the floor and tried to shake his hand free of the remnants. "You are pushing my buttons and you know it." "I don't know what you're talking about. First you lure me here with this false grandeur of clay making-" "You guys are the ones who made a big deal out of it!" "Only because you made it seem so mysterious and intrig-" He quickly ducked out the door, a second ball of clay missed its mark and hit the floor.

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[nobedofroses]

Day 3: Titfuck

pairing: Javier Peña x reader

warnings: boob talk and descriptions of how Javi looks during sex (hehehe)

words: 920

a/n: less explicit than even the title lmao 

Last, Full List, Next

🎃🎃🎃

It was Javier’s birthday and you were excited to surprise him with something you knew he was gonna love, fucking your tits. Normally, this wouldn’t necessarily be birthday worthy, it was actually something you had never done or thought of before Javi. And it wasn’t really that big of a deal to save for a birthday. Except that the two of you had only done it once and Javi most likely thought you never would again. This was because apparently the skin between and beneath your breasts was extremely sensitive and the cheap lube the two of you had used last time (leftover from Javi’s single days) had given you a reaction. Javi, the sweetheart, had felt terrible and apologized and never asked to do it again. 

That had been about a month and a half ago and since then you’d been doing  little patch tests of different lubes to find one that didn’t irritate your skin. And it just so happened you had found one that was both slippery enough and did not cause you any discomfort whatsoever, just before his birthday. It was perfect timing and would be the icing on top of the other activities and gifts you already had planned for his birthday. 

After a lovely and lazy morning and early afternoon of breakfast in bed for him followed by indulgent sex, followed by a lot of cuddling (and some more sex), Javi was out of the house for a beer with Steve. You had been invited along too, but you had declined so you could finish the little cake you were making for Javi. The food was already warming in the oven, just his favorite pasta recipe that you didn’t make all the time because it took a lot of specialty ingredients. (You would’ve made it for him more often but he didn’t want you spending the money just for him.) 

Javi came home just as you were finishing frosting the cake and you smiled at him as he came over to you for a kiss. He wanted a hug too, but you told him he had to do all the hugging with the frosting on your hands. 

“Happy to,” he told you, standing behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist, nuzzling his nose in your neck. “So when do I get to eat this cake?” 

His words were totally innocent, but his tone wasn’t and your neck got hot as you tried to answer his obvious question, “W-well we have pasta and presents and cake. We can do it in any order you like.” 

“That’s what I like to hear,” he murmured before kissing your neck hotly. “Why don’t we eat dinner, and then open presents, and then cake?” 

You nodded and turned your head to kiss him, and in a couple minutes the two of you were sitting down to dinner. About an hour after that, Javi had unwrapped all but one of his presents. You hadn’t been sure how to present this part of his gifts to him, but you had decided to wrap the thing that made it all possible. 

Plus, Javi’s face was hilarious when he opened the present you had made him save for last and saw a bottle of lube. Especially after he had already opened a nice watch, bottle of whiskey, and concert tickets. 

But of course he didn’t want to appear disappointed, “I guess it’s always good to have lube handy. Especially the way we go through it. Thanks, honey.” 

You giggled about how unenthusiastic he sounded, “That’s a dual-part gift, Javi.” 

That definitely got his interest, “Oh? Go on.” 

It was a little difficult to continue talking as Javi reached out and started pulling you towards him, crowding into your space. “I’ve been searching for a replacement lube for a while, and I finally found one that doesn’t give me a skin reaction…” 

Javier was a smart man, so you decided that he could connect the dots on what you meant by that. It only took a few seconds for him to do so and realize what you were giving him. His eyes immediately slid down to your breasts and he groaned softly. 

“Sweetheart, you are too, too good to me,” he told you and you smiled.

“Hmm, true. But now you gotta decide, Javi. Do you want cake or—”

“Tits,” he cut you off and then blushed, dark pink coming to his cheeks. “I mean, you. I mean—” 

This time, you cut him off with a kiss and then stood up, grabbing the bottle of lube and walking to the bedroom. He was so excited and surprised by it all that it took multiple seconds for him to follow you. But then he overtook you and pulled you into the room with him, taking your shirt off and pushing you onto the bed before you even realized it was off. 

As eager as Javi was, you were nearly just as excited. Excited to see him above you, his face and chest flushed, hair curling a little from sweat, his brows furrowed and his lower lip between his teeth. He was always so pretty when he was fucking you, and this way that’s all you had to focus on. That and the dirty sounds he made, which were even better if that was possible. 

You grinned as you watched his hands shake as he undid his belt and reached behind you to take off your bra, just to make it easier for him.

🎃🎃🎃

[shadowedstardust]

cyanide candy hearts, wyler

pairing - wednesday addams x tyler galpin

summary - tyler gives wednesday candy hearts the only way she would eat them (heavily inspired by coffee and change by itsallbachsfault on ao3, chapter sixteen: february).

warnings - use of blood, bone, cyanide, and other gruesome items in baking

word count - 1,333

“The day I eat one of those chalky, colorful candy hearts with mass-produced sentiments printed on them is the day they start filling them with cyanide.”

So, Tyler did, along with a few other things.

When he started he made two lists: items he needed and the recipe to make the candy hearts. Over weeks, the piece of paper he wrote the original recipe on became wrinkled, creased, and stained with a few drops of his blood as well as a coffee ring or two, and ingredients were crossed out and replaced with more gruesome ones after failed attempts.

(The list of items was thrown out on the twelfth attempt.)

The emergency ritual kit he had gotten from Grandmama was able to supply him with the ingredients needed for his test runs but to make the amount of candy hearts he wanted for every day had known Wednesday he would need more and that’s where Mrs. Addams (“call me Morticia, sweet boy”) came in.

When the words “I’m planning a surprise for Wednesday and I need help left Tyler’s mouth” Morticia instantly agreed and the next day the ingredients he required were on his bed in a steamer trunk with a card on top from Mrs. Addams that she “hopes the surprise goes dreadfully well.”

She was the best.

His dad was out of the house that day and Wednesday was continuing to craft Viper’s gruesome death for a side project so it was the perfect day for him to create her spine-chilling treats. The rain clouds and gloomy atmosphere outside made it even better.

“Okay.” Tyler clapped his hands and rubbed them together in preparation suddenly feeling intimidated by the ingredients in front of him.

The original recipe called for: 2 teaspoons of light corn syrup, ¼ ounce or two teaspoons of unflavored gelatin, ½ cup of water, 2 pounds confectioners’ sugar, plus additional for dusting, a few drops of food coloring, assorted, and a few drops of flavoring extracts, assorted, as well.

Tyler’s recipe called for: 2 teaspoons of his own blood, ¼ or two teaspoons of powdered collagen from a wild boar (“it’s Wednesday’s favorite,” Morticia explained), ½ cup of water, 1 pound of human bone, all ribs, again Wednesday’s favorite, plus additional for dusting, food coloring, midnight blue, Venetian red, plum, and black, and, of course, cyanide.

The difference was very obvious and perfectly tailored for Wednesday’s macabre tastes.

Tyler grabbed the microwave-safe bowl in front of him, poured in his blood, water, and powdered collagen, and mixed the ingredients together before putting it into the microwave for thirty seconds. When he was playing with the recipe he accidentally warmed it for too long and the blood became a jelly-like substance.

He pulled it out when the microwave beeped and poured it into the bowl attached to the large stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment. He poured in one cup of human bone and began mixing. He added another cup and mixed until it became a brown sugar/syrup-like substance, continuing with this until the full pound of human bone was added occasionally stopping to scrape down the bottom and the sides of the bowl.

Finished with that step, he turned and dusted the only empty counter with flour and scraped the mixture onto it. He dusted the top of the mixture with more flour before beginning to knead the treat mixture. Folding the dough on top of itself and then using the heel of his hand to press it down before turning it a quarter and repeating. (His hyde strength came in handy here.) Dusting it with flour when it began to stick to his fingers.

After the mixture was finally kneaded to a proper form. He pulled on some gloves and grabbed his food coloring and the cyanide, which was a faint blue.

He began dividing the dough into four portions, one portion for each color. He colored each portion of the dough, a collagen and bone-filled dough with the food colorings that he had chosen to match the colors of the bruises he had seen on his neck a few mornings ago.

He hoped Wednesday would enjoy it.

Tyler grabbed the black portion to start with and flatten it against the counter until it was ¼ of an inch thick like the store-bought candies before taking his special cookie cutters that he had found on some morbid baking website. The cookie cutters were miniature anatomically correct hearts… that were very disturbing. There were no veins of anything just the general shape of the heart with valves.

Periodically, he colored all of the portions, flattened them, and cut them into heart shapes.

Soon enough, he had four different pans, that were lined with parchment paper, of anatomically correct heart treats. He couldn’t call it candy anymore even if Wednesday would find his blood tasty. Each pan had different color treats: midnight blue, plum, Venetian red, and black.

Sadly, he now had to let them dry for twenty-four hours.

He had no idea how he was going to hide them from his dad.

(Wednesday excitedly sedated his dad with a strong sedative to make sure he stayed at the station all night without even asking why.)

Wednesday sat in front of Tyler, across the table in his dining room. Her hands rested in her lap and her stare was on him like she was peeling his skin off, cutting through his muscles and bones to stare directly at his heart.

He didn’t care. She could have it. He would claw and tear it out of his chest in the most gruesome way possible and present it to her but right now all he had was treats.

“These are for you,” Tyler said, presenting a tin to her and sliding it across the wooden table. The metal created a grating sound in the air as the metal moved against the table. “I think you’ll enjoy them.”

Wednesday narrowed her eyes at him. While Tyler did have a habit of giving her gifts they were usually in the form of bruises around her neck from attempted strangulation, at her assistance, and claw marks that never went as deep as she wanted.

And she knew this was neither.

Wednesday pulled the tin closer to her, feeling the metal beneath her fingers, and steeled her gaze toward it. She leaned towards it and took a quick sniff before leaning back and narrowing her eyes at Tyler.

The smug look in his eyes made her want to bite his carotid.

(“The tin is scent-proof, dear. She won’t be able to smell anything until it is close to her nose.”)

“You’ve been in touch with mother.”

Tyler knew it wasn’t a question, she was stating a fact.

Wednesday took her time opening the tin and sat the top down beside it, the metal making a soft thud when she placed it on the table. She looked down at the treat that lay inside before looking back up at him, “hearts?”

Now, that was a question.

“And not the immature, incorrect, mainstream kind,” Tyler added, a tentative smile on his lips. “You still have to taste,” he continued. He was glad she couldn’t see the way his leg bounced from nervousness under the table.

Wednesday reached into the tin and pulled out one of the treats turning it around in the air before bringing it up to her mouth and taking a bite.

The crunch made him want to flinch.

Wednesday chewed slowly before her eyes widened.

“Cyanide.”

“And human bone, ribs,” Tyler suddenly spouted out unable to keep the words in anymore. “Wild boar collagen, and-”

“Your blood,” Wednesday interrupted and put the rest of the treat in her mouth and swallowed before continuing, “acceptable.”

Tyler smiled, brightly. She liked them.

“Acceptable” from Wednesday was an off-the-charts rating from anyone else.

“...And creative,” Wednesday continued.

His work had paid off.

“Do you have a glass of your blood to wash them down with?”

shadow spiels!

cannibalism is the new sex (coming tommorow) was suppposed to be the first thing i posted but i read coffee and change was struck by sudden inspiration and this is what was crafted. the official candy recipe is here. find someone who makes you anatomically correct candy hearts.

2/5/2023

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