#policy issues HMMMM

[officialbabayaga]

when i visited my cousin after a christmas party he had 18 bottles of champagne left over so his mom made me take like 4 of them, anyway i finally opened one for the first time today because i got a 3.93 semester gpa, which has bumped my cumulative gpa up enough to be a competitive candidate for PhD programs i’m applying to in the fall. and it’s great champagne

[wifeglor]

14, 21 for maemag, 22 for gap pussy

hi hi!!! (From this list)

14. What are your favorite smut tropes?

I feel like you know them already :D But hmmmm more seriously... I think in general, I have "will think about something I initially found off-putting too hard and decide actually it is hot/fun/wtv" disease, so this would be a long and very inclusive list. I love a good power dynamic in smutfic (good in the sense of a fine vintage, not moral good), whether it's like a fun thing a sweet couple is playacting, an underlying reality for a ship, or outright dubcon/noncon. Obviously "power dynamic" can fit a billion tropes, but I love very many of those tropes for that underlying reason lmao. Also, I love when there's a lot of emotion, be it DRAMA, or angst, or hurt/comfort, or anything else. Obviously those strike different notes and it depends on the story, but like while I think it can be less "sexy" than pure porn I LOVE SO MUCH reading a good like "magical healing dick" conclusion to an arc of longing and woes. It's an orgasm of the SOUL. Or "magical healing baby spawned from magical healing dick," I am Not Immune to this (it's about the Cherishing). Also, I love those ppl on AO3 who are out there writing the most fucked up (affectionate) monsterfucking oneshots ft. worldbuilding with their original characters and original universes--doing Eru's work. ALSO I remember once upon a time being judgy about omegaverse and laugh because wow that really didn't last long on my part as soon as I opened those fics and realized there was longing inside.

21. Share a smutty headcanon about [character(s)]. (Maedhros/Maglor)

Wow who are these characters I've never heard of them before...

I feel like I need a whole essay to try to get out all my thoughts about them and it wouldn't entirely make any sense, but I think the one-headcanon version is like. Maglor longs to be claimed by Maedhros and please Maedhros and be absolved and loved and worthy & this translates well in his brain to being penetrated. Maedhros longs to feel like he can effectively take care of Maglor/make Maglor happy (something I think he has real despair and doubt about, but the resigned despair and bitterness that he can't correlates to how much he WISHES to) and also that his control issues/endless responsibility-taking are Working Actually And Perfectly Good & this translates well in his brain to penetrating Maglor (which is on unspoken offer from Maglor whenever Maglor is in the same continent and Maedhros is still breathing). Much love. I think that dynamic remains in play between them regardless of the sex act but this sure is my preference for them.

22. Share a DVD commentary on [one of your smut fic/smutty scene from a longer work]. (Mapmaking, known in my google docs folder as "gap pussy")

YEAHH okay. So this one has been lurking almost a full year (I think) as a handful of incoherent notes in my notes app, which sort of sketched out a lot of the dirty talk and action. This was very convenient for finally sitting down and writing it!! Which I had a lot of fun doing; every fic of mine for smut week has been pure self-indulgence. This fic owes a spiritual debt to Death and Taxes, an amazing russingon fic by TheLionInMyBed that was formative in my Maedhros thinking like... very early in my entry to Silm fandom stuff. I just loved Maedhros combining his politics and strategy (never turned off!) with sex and romance in such a blatant, funny, affectionate-but-instrumental way. Also, I've been making "Maglor's Gap " jokes since like. Forever, so it was bound to happen sometime.

The actual "strategy" on Maedhros' part here (aka the policies he wants Maglor to enact) is purely styrofoam porn setup and maybe doesn't really make sense, but I figured that's not what we're here for so I didn't pay it too much mind. What I did want to come through in that aspect of the story was Maedhros' affection for Maglor (kinda understated I think in this fic, but he doesn't want Maglor to die in like, say, dragonfire, and he will do all he can to prevent that. He wants Maglor to be as secure as he can, even though maintaining the siege/leaguer & his own trust & strategy mean Maglor is at great personal risk in this critical position) and Maedhros' tendency to taking leaderly responsibility (he's aware of the risk and that he's asked this of Maglor, & Himring will help out the Gap).

Also, in my head this is a spiritual sequel to my magnum opus Thine Ever, Makalaurë, despite the fact that in between these 2 Gap-era moments, Maglor by miracle of Yavanna's touch gained a pussy. This is a period I associate with a lot of hope for them and a sort of renewing of ties, testing and forging of Maglor's devotion and Maedhros' reliance on it, and Himring!Maedhros=sexiest Maedhros. I'm finding it really fun lately to write humor and dirty talk, both of which are kinda new terrain for me, so that's been delightful on my end. New terrain... ha

[novaauster]

HELLOOOOOOOOO im reading the narines fic and thought id live react here bc i just KNOW im gonna have THOUGHTS let's go!

"The prince--king--piece of shit-- is obsessed" off the bat i love your nate characterisation like his povs always have that snarky edge to them and u got that off the bat

"He’s in his dressing gown. White silk, tied with a wound-dark sash at his waist, open down the navel. His snake, Kidaro, is slung around his neck like a priest’s stole, warming itself on his skin." THIS FREAK RIGHT HERE HAS CAUSED EVERYONE ALL MANNER OF PROBLEMS TONIGHT. TOXIC YAOI WONT FIX HIM BUT IT WILL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER ABOUT IT ALL

"a fanatic to the hate that he inherited" LOVE this wording

THEY'RE SUCH CUNTS TO EACH OTHER I LOVE IT

IT'S THE KIND OF DARKNESS YOU PRAY TO HMMMM

the way the signs of respect and fear are overlapping ohhhh i love that

'“It is a small room in which nobles and officials debate policy decisions…�� Herines launches into an automatic explanation before remembering who he’s talking to. “You’ll see, raven.”' actually laughed out loud at this bc it's SO HIM. herines is a nerd first tyrant second

THE FIREEEEEEEEEE OMG

"A clear-headed Herines is a dangerous Herines, one that looks at him, curious, like something to dissect, one that could figure out that Nate can heal himself but he can’t regrow an amputation. He can’t survive a decapitation, and Herines’ dagger is long enough to try it." your writing is so captivating im literally here like OMG WHAT NEXT at every sentence they're CRAZY crazy

"'I fucked your brother" THE WAY MY HANDS FLEW TO MY MOUTH. INSANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IM GOING INSANE

'declawed' is an excellent way of describing nate when he hits his exhaustion

NATE IS GETTING BATTERED RN OH MY GOD MY BOY GET UPPPP YOU'RE EMBARRASSING US 😭

also having nate repeatedly break his bones to escape his restraints is such a cool move bc it's SO something he would do

"What made you?" "You did." YOU'RE PAYING FOR MY THERAPY

THAT WAS A RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE. YEAH I BASHED HIS FACE IN WITH AN OIL LAMP AND HE KILLED ME WITH THE SASH OF MY OWN ROBE BUT WE ALSO FUCKED NASTY. WE EXIST

genuinely that was so so so good i literally had heart palpitations i was so excited i cant believe there's tbos fic on ao3 now im losing my MINDDDDDDDDDDDd i will reread this 5 more times tonight probably

omg tysm!!!!

nate's characterization is extremely fun, if there is one word i'd use to describe it's instigator. he's not stupid but he will always say the bitchiest thing possible at any possible moment and i love him for it. rin is also such a freak i can't fathom what is wrong with him. what mommy issues will do to an mf in charge of a country on the verge of civil war. i was extremely proud of the fanatic line

"it's the darkness you pray to" was also a fun one, yeah. nate's relationship with the gods that gave him his powers and then abandoned him. darkness, something that might be profound and beautiful, but still by definition hinders any human. the overlap between respect and fear as a result of nate's trauma as an oppressed wiser and a violent rebel

rin's nerdiness was just delightful. like yes he wants to dissect nate like a cow's eyeball and yes he uses his intelligence for evil. but that is by nurture, by nature he's just curious. and it was very intentional that the things that make him snap are the thought that nate might've hurt drako and then later that nate is hurting kidaro

"declawed" was definitely a choice of words, i was googling "synonyms for harmless" because harmless is not at all how i would describe him, and eventually it came to me. and yeah he's really getting battered. it's hard to balance or strike with your hands cuffed behind your back. F in the chat for my boy

"what made you" "you did" the drama. the intimacy. the way rin is searching in the wisers for an origin to the cracks in his family but his family made the cracks in the wisers instead. nate might be an instigator but rin is a tyrant and he sees that when he looks in the mirror. they're character foils your honor

again, thanks for the ask!! :-D

[rollercoasterwords]

hi!! i've been thinking of applying for an international studies degree at uni, so i was just wondering what you thought of your course?

hmmmm well overall i enjoyed international studies but. i do not want 2 ever study it in a formal academic setting ever again. a lot of that is just down to personal preferences tho (this got really long lmao i'm so sorry)

i majored in IS at a usamerican university so i can't really speak to what expectations u should have for an IS program outside the states (or even necessarily what to expect other than like. what i got at my specific college lol) but!! while i really enjoyed a lot of the subject matter in learning about international relations, getting to study a lot of history and foreign policy, etc, a lot of the main frameworks used in IS are frameworks that i.....really do not like. right now in a lot of the world liberalism seems to dominate perspectives on international relations, and historically realism has been like....the foundational framework in the field. there are many more scholars who use feminist or marxist or post-structuralist etc etc frameworks that i jive with more, but a lot of IS even at some of the higher academic level lacks any critical anaylsis of colonialism or capitalism and the way they underly many of the assumptions in the field about how states will/should interact with each other. and my experience of IS at a usamerican college was (predictably) very western-centric and specifically US-centric.

like -- an example of what i'm talking about; you might get scholars researching "terrorism" without any critical analysis of where "terrorism" comes from as a label, what context it was created in, how it's been used in the past, who gets to use it, what forms of legitimacy or illegitimacy it perpetuates as a label, etc etc. or you might get scholars studying "development" without any real analysis of the ways that "development" is a very political term that oftentimes assumes all states should follow some sort of linear path based largely on states for whom colonization was an essential part of speedrunning that "path" towards "development"

and like i don't wanna undersell bc as i said there are TONS of scholars who ARE doing really great analysis that is very much questioning preconceptions in the field and helping to reframe the way we think, so if u are really interested in IS there is definitely a growing branch of the field that is breaking away from these sorts of necolonial western-centric assumptions + frameworks. my area of focus was latin america, and i spent most of the last year of my degree writing about how traditional conceptualizations of state security perpetuate gendered violence, specifically at the us-mexico border. and so i got to immerse myself in a side of the field that i really loved, and that was great!!

but the thing that really sort of sealed the deal for me on deciding i don't want to pursue IS for any more advanced studies was my senior thesis. up until that point, because i was a dual IS-history major, most of my papers had been more humanities based, but for my senior thesis i HAD to use social science methodology, where you're picking variables and trying to measure them and draw conclusions etc etc, and i just.... hated it. i think social science research certainly can be very important and informative, but everything i wanted to study was too nebulous of a concept to really measure in any meaningful way--and i think a lot of IS research can kinda run into that issue, because, again, if you're gonna measure something as nebulous as "democratic freedom" or "development," it's like.....what assumptions are you beginning with about what defines those concepts and how we measure them?

anyway in the end i kind of rebelled a little bit and designed a study based on the guidelines we had to follow where i basically went "if we measure development based on this notion that it's a linear process we can measure in the first place, we'd expect to see this in this country! but wait! we don't!! perhaps because the notion of development in and of itself is based on neocolonial assumptions and it's stupid to act like we can measure it or predict how certain states are going to act just bc The Western World acted that way!!" and my professor got a little annoyed w me and felt like i was being presumptuous and not giving enough credit to the scholars in the field who are treating that question seriously, which looking back i probably was a little bit, but for the most part i stand by my paper <3

anyway. that experience cemented for me that i wanted to stick firmly to humanities and cease any dabbling in social sciences moving forward, simply bc i do not enjoy using that research methodology. but if ur interested in social science + enjoy the methodology, or are more interested in quantitative than qualitative research, then u would not have that same issue! my advice 2 anyone interested in IS is just to engage w postcolonial, feminist, and anticapitalist writing + scholarship so that u are not just accepting questionable assumptions when u inevitably run into them in the field. also be ready to have classes w some really annoying conservatives who think that international relations is a zero-sum game (á la realism) and some really annoying liberals who think that institutions like the UN are flawless deities who would save the whole world if only everyone agreed to play a little bit nicer (a lá liberalism)

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

hmmmm

hmmmmmmm

my mum might have covid

and it's like, a strong might

she got a negative on the RAT test but her symptoms are big covid red flags so we're treating it as a false negative until she takes another test tomorrow

I even called a covid helpline and when I told them she couldn't taste or smell but still got a negative they said 'yeah no absolutely stay home and test again tomorrow, if she gets another negative but the symptoms are still concerning, take another test the next day, three or four false negatives in a row is really unlikely'

I had to call up to get this info because I actually have trouble finding any reliable, consistent, and clear info on covid online in regards to more specific issues, most of the main hits on google are general non-specific info pages and a lot of the time the advice is vague and unclear or contradictory

I dunno if that's just Australian politics being shithouse with their policies (god knows they are) or if this has been a universal issue but at least I got some more clear answers from the hotline

so yeah I'm sharing this advice for anyone else who has concerns, take a RAT test once a day for three to four days if you keep getting negatives but you're still really concerned about your symptoms

apparently RATs are slightly more likely to give a false negative when you've been vaccinated (I can't find a reliable resource to confirm this tho so keep that in mind)

also quick question are they charging you for RATs in your country and if so how much? I just paid AUS$20 per test, that was AUS$100 to get five for mum's continuing tests and in case me or my dad need one

they're barely worth half of that but stores are allowed to up the price to a max of $20 at their own discretion so of course 90% of them do exactly that and some illegally charge even more (my friend paid $30)

but because our government is cheap as hell they skimped on buying enough RAT tests to meet demand so now people will desperately pay whatever to get their hands on them and they sell out immediately

there are few things on this earth that enrage me more than people profiting from the desperation of people during a pandemic, fucking disgusting

[grogusmum]

Hello Grogu, buddy! I wanna know, what went through your cute head when you and Dad got to Sorgan? I bet you had a great time with Winta and her friends!

I will tell you Iris Gobbo, my cute head said this place is nice and green! The trees are so so tall! I liked it much more than the dusty or lava-y places Dad and I usually go!

We went to a cantina place, and good news I got food to eat. Bad news Bone Broth. Dad sigh. Plus also, I met a very meanie loth-cat, that was disappointing cuz it looked like a fluffy guy.

That is where we met Cara. She became Dad's good friend after they had a big tussle... That seems to be how Dad makes most of his friends. hmmmm. Someone should talk to him about that.

I know she would do anything for me and Dad, BUT she questions my ability to fly the Razor Crest and she also holds me like I am a thermal detonator... mmm plus also I force choked her, on accident. ONLY CUZ I THOUGHT SHE WAS HURTING MY DAD! Apparently, they were playing a strong arms game, that I didn't know about. Psst Don't tell her but I call her Carasanthumum Dune when I am mad at her, just to myself though. ANYWAYS this has made our relationship is a little rocky.

I liked the ride to the village, the stars were pretty and it was so quiet and the cart rocked in a nice sleepy way. And when we got to the village in the morning! EVERYBODY cheered because we had arrived!! The other kids were very fun, especially Winta. We all like to go frog hunting and I am the best at it. But I do not know what they want with the frogs, cuz apparently they do not eat them! Why is a frog different from a krill? I ask you! But despite our differences on the frog issue, she is my best friend there, and I miss her. I hope we can visit again someday.

(I have since come around on the do not eat frogs policy.)

Thank you for asking about my friend Winta! Here we all are, having friendship.

[queenoftheworldisdead]

Gaslight Chapter 1

Summary: Reader has issues with their mother and seeks therapy. Loki is the reader’s therapist. He gaslights the read to break the reader down. Warning: Slow burn, and i mean slooooooow, manipulation, mind games

Note: Thank you so much @dreamslikeaheartbeat​ for making the mood board! It’s so beautiful.

Dark Loki x reader, evil, diabolical characters

You had never been to therapy before, in your family there had always been a stigma around it. So when you finally set out to make an appointment you were a bit apprehensive. When you settled on a doctor you googled their location. You were delighted when you saw that their office was a cute little house instead of an office building. The house seemed so warm and inviting that it eased you a bit so you booked a session.

Arriving 20 minutes early you parked your car in front of the pastel cottage. There were rose bushes and you could swear you had never seen a yard so green. Opening the short metal gate, walking through it, it clanked quietly as it closed behind you. Walking the path to the porch you hesitated at the door. Debating with yourself if you should just walk in or knock. Biting your bottom lip you decided on the latter.

Knock Knock

You could hear a voice telling you to enter. Opening the door you were greeted by an older woman. On her desk you saw a name placard that read Frigga. The foyer felt like you fell into a West Anderson movie. There were vivid colors accented everywhere, the walls papered with floral wallpaper. You introduced yourself and let her know you were a first time patient here for your appointment. She smiled warmly and asked for your insurance card and ID. Handing them over she gave you a few documents to fill out. You took them and sat on one of the chairs lined against the wall. Sitting back a bit nervous still you set to completing the forms.

As you wrote she made a call notifying the doctor of your arrival. When you finished you handed her the documents back and she told you to go right in to the door off to her right.

You were about to knock when Mrs. Frigga stopped you and told you to walk in. You took a deep breath, twisted the door knob and opened it. This room was not as brightly colored or lit as the reception. Even the air seemed cooler sending a slight shiver throughout your body.

"Hello?" You call out softly.

Looking around the room you spotted the doctor scribbling away at a desk in the corner. Walking over still a bit nervous. Her body hunched over her desk, her long black hair dusting over   the papers she wrote upon.

With the deep forest green curtains drawn it was hard to make out her features.

"Miss Laufeyson? Excuse me, sorry I'm here for my appointment"

Her head lifted slightly, turning her gaze from the papers it wrote upon to look at you. Your stomach sank as your eyes widened in shock.

She was a he, a handsomely striking he. You didn't have any particular issues with men. You just thought that a woman could relate more to you.

You could feel your face burn under his gaze. His allure was palpable it almost felt hypnotizing so much so you had to look away to the floor.

"I'm sorry I'm looking for Mrs. or Miss Laufeyson" you fidgeted with the strap of the purse on your shoulder as you spoke. He looked at you almost amused, then laughed softly pushing up his black framed glasses that had fallen down the bridge of his nose.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know of any Mrs or Miss Laufeyson aside for my mother. And I'm afraid in that case she has long since remarried. I'm Doctor Laufeyson." His rich sultry accent did little to quail the pounding of your heart and the sight of his face only worsened it. 

"Oh no... I've must've made a mistake. I'm sorry. I thought I scheduled an appointment with um... a woman doctor." You said as you fidget again with the strap.

"Would you like to cancel this appointment then?" At his suggestion your head shot up. Obviously he understood your simple mistake you thought. Keeping eye contact was hard though. The longer you looked at him the harder it was to keep his gaze. He was a breath taking sight so you found comfort at turning your eyes away to the floor.

"Yes sorry" it almost came out as a whisper.

"We have a 24 hour cancellation policy. If you cancel now I must inform you that you will be charged a cancellation fee on top of your co-pay"

"But it was a mistake." Your voice almost shrieking.

"Look....stay for this session and at the end I will give you a few recommendations to other 'Female' doctors in your network. How does that sound?" He offered.

Contemplating you thought about it. You could just sit and talk for a while of nothing important. No harm in that right and at least you would be sure to be given the information for a woman doctor.

"OK" you resigned.

"Alright then. Please take a seat where ever you like"

Looking around the room again you noticed a stag's head. The poor creature mounted above the fireplace, its antlers so large and wide that it seemed impossible that it came from such a small creature. The stained wood floors and wall washed the room with dark tones. The cobblestone fireplace unlit, surely due to the season, but you could still pick up the light sent of burnt kindling.

In front of it sat a circle of chairs with matching upholstery. Two arm chairs and a couch. Colored in a light cognac, circling a small glass coffee table held-up by blackened tree trunk.

The couch was the most appealing so you made your way to it. There was a comfortable distance between it and the other chairs that surrounded the table.

As you sat he began straightening a pile of papers on his desk. When he finished he stood and walked over with a yellow notepad and pen.

He rolled up his sleeves as he approached the arm chair opposite you. His forest green tie tucked meticulously into his waistcoat that cinched at his waist. His lean figure made you regret all the broken promises you made to yourself about going to the gym or dieting. The whole look coupled with his black framed glasses gave him the look of a tenured professor.

Compared to him you felt under dressed for the occasion. You could almost hear your mother nagging about your appearance. Making you doubt your dress and demeanor.

"Would you like a cup of tea? Water? Coffee?" Dr.Laufeyson asked. He chose the arm chair closest to his desk and sat. Crossing his tailored slacks he placed the notepad in his lap.

"Oh no no thank you" replying sheepishly.

He bit the end of the pen as he considered you for a moment than began to write again. You sat anxiously waiting for him to instruct you on what to do.

But he didn't, the minutes ticked away and he just wrote paying you no mind.

"Um.... I don't know what to do here?" After some internal debating you finally spoke.

He didn't look up he just kept writing.

"Um excuse me Mr.Laufeyson" you shouted a little louder than you attended.

"Dr. Laufeyson" he didn't look up as he corrected you.

"I'm sorry it just that I thought"

"Hmmmm?" Lifting his gaze from his notepad to finally look at you.

"Dr. Laufeyson. I thought you were supposed to ask me questions or something. Like do you ever have dreams about going on dates with guys but when they turn around they have the head of my mother?" You rambled.

He cocked his brow." Are you having dreams like that?"

"Sorry, No! No no no! It was a bad Freudian joke" You covered your face with your hand in embarrassment.

Great now he is going to think you have an Oedipus complex? Why do you even try and speak? Ugh.

He was writing again you could hear his pen scribble on the pad. You didn't feel good about it.

Tilting his head back straightening his posture. His eyes took you in. You could feel his examining gaze.

Was he diagnosing you?

"It's OK to be nervous and that's not the worst Freudian joke I've ever heard by the way" you could hear his slight chuckle. "Think of this as a get to know you session. You can't fail at this or get this wrong I'm here to help you."

He asked you many questions. Some about your likes, what you did for work, how you liked it, about your family. You answered and the conversation flowed. You had never had someone take genuine interest in you before, but that was his job right? To try to listen. It was just all so new to you.

Your session went over the allotted time. Then finally after an hour overtime he stopped the session. You apologized, but he only smiled and reassured you that's what he is here for.

By the end he gave you the information to an actual female doctor by the name of Odinson. A part of you wanted to continue with him, but another part of you still wanted a woman's touch.

After your appointment with Dr. Laufeyson you made the appointment with Dr. Odinson. Over the phone you had confirmed with the receptionist that Dr. Odinson was indeed a woman. To which you were relieved. Your appointment with her being the following Monday.

Dr. Odinson's office was less wholesome than Dr. Laufeyson's. It was located in an office building. Mirrored glass encased the exterior, it looked so sleek, cold yet new. Walking from the parking garage to the main building you were intimidated by the massive structure. Once inside you took a deep breath and made your way to the security desk. After choking up the nerve to ask for directions he pointed to the elevator and the floor.

Unlike Mrs. Frigga he made you feel as if your presence was a nuisance.

The soft elevator music did little to loll your nerves as you rode it up. You were having second thoughts, maybe you should've stuck with Dr. Laufeyson. The session wasn't bad at all and at least his office felt like a home that made you feel invited and it was so wholesome. When the elevator finally arrived on the floor you were still nervous. Despite the luxurious feel of the floor you felt even more out of place. This only stoked the fire of your anxiety and inferiority complex.

The receptionist at Dr. Odinson's office was young and beautiful. Surely if she didn't work here you would find her on Instagram laying out on some island that you could never pronounce or afford.

When you reached her desk she was unaware of your presence. A common theme of those whose beauty you could only dream to attain. Staring at her computer screen she yelped when she finally noticed you.

"Oh I am so sorry!" You apologized. " I didn't mean to I..um have an appointment with Dr. Odinson"

She was startled but collected herself and smiled up at you. "It's OK. You must be Y/N, we tried to contact you."

You knitted your brow and tilted your head.

"Dr. Odinson had to cancel your appointment today. She had a family emergency and had to leave abruptly."

"Don't worry we won't charge you for the inconvenience" she smiled up at you.

You were relieved that you wouldn't have to pay for not paying attention to your cell phone.

"Since you're here would you like to reschedule?" She inquired.

"Oh Um....... I need to check my schedule. Is that OK?" rubbing the back of your head as you thought about the question.

"Sure thing just call me and I will get you rescheduled right away." She smiled at you brightly, but something about it almost felt robotic. You mirrored her forcing a smile before turning to the elevators to retreat. Walking back down the hall to the elevator as you wait for the doors to open you felt anxious. Tapping your feet you thought something with this place didn't sit right with you. You preferred the small sweet home of Dr. Laufeyson.

When the doors opened you were surprise by the size of the giant inside the metal box. You scurried inside apologizing to him as you looked at the number pad to press the lobby button, but it was already highlighted. The mirrored walls of the elevator allowed you to steel glances at him through your lashes. At a glance you could see his eyes were red and looked irritated, but his stoic face would not betray him. His hands shoved in his pockets he stood in the back of the elevator. Through his uniform you could make out the perfectly sculpted physique. He adorned black scrubs with an insignia you couldn't make out from your distance, his golden hair tied his a high bun. The sheer sight of it had you biting your bottom lip. You had only seen men like him on tv or Instagram.

In your corner you felt a nagging, a nosiness to ask what was wrong, ask if he was OK. There was a part of you that felt bad for even interrupting his descent, surely he wanted to be alone.

Why didn't I wait for the next elevator?

Your self hatred was mixing with your need to nurture and fix things. Finally the overwhelming urge to comfort him won out and you spoke.

"Um I'm sorry are you OK?" Looking at him through the mirrored walls you ask. As the words slipped out you mentally started to beat yourself up.

You immediately regretted your actions. You should've stayed silent. You don't know him why did you even care.

"I'm fine my lady" the deep intonation of his voice hit your ears like honey.

My lady? What is this?

In less than two weeks it felt like you landed in a foreign land filled with accents that you only dreamt of.

"I'm so sorry its just.... You look so sad and I'm so sorry." You frantically try to apologize for sticking your nose in where it didn't belong.

His deep chuckle filled the space between your frantic apologies. Covering his mouth to hide a smile he tried to compose himself before the elevator announced the lobby floor.

When the doors opened you managed to shut your mouth. Regret and disdain filled you. He motioned for you to leave first and without another word you two departed. Since you figured he was going to the parking garage you went the opposite direction. Going to the lobby restroom to hide out for thirty minutes until he had gone completely from the area.

You felt stupid for even talking to him for bothering him. You always felt weird talking to people. You always had that nagging feeling that people hated you when you opened your mouth, breathed their air or shared a spaced anyone.

That was one of the reasons you wanted to go to therapy. To understand yourself. To stop feeling this way.

Pulling out your phone as you waited in the stall you called Dr. Laufeyson. You didn't want to come back here. To risk running into him again.

*Ring

It felt like the phone barely got off the first ring before someone answered.

"Hello Dr. Laufeyson's office how may I be of assistance" it wasn't Mrs. Frigga.

"Um.. Sorry." You were expecting Mrs. Frigga.

Who was this person?

"Sorry" you apologize again " I.. wanted to make an appointment with Dr. Laufeyson.

"Miss Y/N?"

How did this person know your name?

"What huh?" you were still caught off guard.

"Mrs. Frigga is out today so I have the double duty of answering my own calls." The voice laughed. It was Dr. Laufeyson.

"Oh. Oh OK. Sorry" you said frazzled.

"You don't have to apologize. Where you calling to make another appointment?" There was a pause "Did things not work out with Dr.  Odinson"

"She wasn't available for our appointment. Something came up"

"Well I'm sure you can reschedule" he assured you.

"I just don't like it here. May I book another session with you?....Please?" Your voice went soft again unsure if you should've even asked.

You had rejected him as a doctor why would he want to see you again?

"Are you sure" he asked coolly.

"Yes please"

And with that he scheduled your next appointment for the next week.

[the-daily-tizzy]

Hope yet...

From President Trump’s attorney, Jenna Ellis...

Today, the electoral college votes will be sealed and sent by special carrier to Washington where they will remain sealed until January 6th when the House and Senate will come into a joint session to open the votes. 

The media is going to make you believe that it's all over and Joe Biden is now officially president...\

On January 6th, Nancy Pelosi will sit down with the rest of the House members as she has no special power or authority over the hearing... 

Vice President Mike Pence will have all the authority as president of the Senate for that day and will accept or reject motions to decide the next steps by the assembly.

Remember... Mike Pence is in full authority that day as written in the Constitution. 

The ballots will be certified today but that means nothing...

The votes will be opened and at that point one House member could, and most likely will, raise their hand to object to the Vice President on the state of elector's votes. 

That objection could cover fraud or any other reason, and with the seconding of that objection everything changes. 

Everything!!

The House and Senate will divide for two hours (at least) to debate, then vote. 

The vote will be per Senator with the Vice President being the deciding vote if needed in the Senate, while the vote in the House will be only be ONE vote per delegation, per state, not per House member!!! 

The Republicans have 30 delegation votes compared to the Democrats 20 delegation votes.

If this scenario runs true, President Trump gets re-elected.

The Democrats, the media, social networks and globalists around the world will come unhinged and chaos will erupt. 

Bigly.

President Trump is trying to do the right thing and go through the courts first, expose all the fraud, but we all knew that none of the courts, even the Supreme Court wanted to touch this issue with a 10-ft pole!

This is why our forefathers were so brilliant because they knew something like this could happen someday. 

So, don't listen to the media and all their deception and lies. 

All you have to do is read the Constitution and you know that the law, policies and procedures in the end are on our side.

Hmmmm...  🤔 Hmm?

⚠️ Re-blog at your own risk...while you still can...

[blacklabyrinth07]

2, 24, and 31 for the ask thing :)

Thanks @spicycheeser for the ask! :D I hope this answers some of your curiosity. Prepare for the info dump.

2. How do you spend your time when it comes to fanfiction? Are you primarily a fic reader, writer, or a perfect 50/50 split of both?

Oh boy... This is one of those questions that makes me re-evaluate my life's choices. No really, I spend waaaaayyy too much time reading fanfic and not much time writing. I would love to be more writing-focused or even a solid 50/50 split, but often it's much more like I read all the time (often skipping around fandoms) and then maybe get a chance to write once every few months (if I'm lucky). Seriously, that's all the time I have for it. The joys of doctoral school, ya'll. I hope to get back into writing more, but we'll see. The other issue I have with writing, beside lacking the time or motivation, is that I do jump around fandoms a lot, so even though I often sit and write out 40 some pages at a time (and I tell my Beta my hand slipped, here's several chapters at a time and nothing else for the rest of the year), it seems like it's never for the fandom that is popular right now. That, and I have a habit of starting long projects and never seeming to finish them - whoops. Like, I am so close on my supercorp one, but alas... For example, I am writing for my two RWBY fics, but I also have been working on a Ranger's Apprentice OC fic that like no one is going to read but me (non-published). And I also outlined works for a soulmate AU for The Owl House, and a five part series (all one shots) involving an lesbian ghost writer OC in the world of Violet Evergarden. Again, which is only being written for my benefit. So probably too much info on my end, but here we are, never writing fics for the ones that are popular, so motivation is at an all time low.

24. What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write?

I really had to think about this - there are several that annoy me or I simply refuse to read or write (like underage or rape, cheating, or poly [mostly because it's still written as cheating-turned-ok?]), but the one that I REFUSE to read or write is some sort of major power dynamic, like teacher-student relationships. I HATE THEMMMMMM. Why? Because I am a teacher - also a student, it's weird. I have had coworkers check out their students before and it's creepy as hell. Most students are barely 18 (I teach on a colligate level while working on my degree) and my coworkers are often 25-40 years old, so there is a hell of a lot of grooming there. There's a reason most places have these types of relationships outlawed or not allowed via an ethics policy. Gross.... Plus since I write mostly f/f, or with bisexuals, there is this odd/creepy sexual predictor dynamic with vast age differences and/or teacher-student relationships. Again, this is why my college has "doors open at all times" policies. Having a crush on a teacher in middle school is sometimes a funny troupe, but anything more - esp. sexual relationships between teachers and students (even 18+) is unbearable for me to read.

31. Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

Hmmmm.... this is difficult. I love writing for Weiss (RWBY) in any of my fics because our mentality and situations can be similar - I just love that bean. But because of that, she's not really a challenge to write. I guess my answer might be Lena (Supergirl) as a vigilante (found Here), just because it was so fun to manipulate the character in ways to make it seem some-what still in character, but to make them my own version of her. Then again, I've LOVED writing for Aloy in my RWBY Kingdom Hearts AU (found Here)! She was my first real attempt to write a completely original character with a complex backstory, quirks, feelings, etc. I've written OCs before, but something about her story and characterization makes me all warm and fuzzy. I am particularly proud of her - Aloy's story is about to be super intense and fun!

[femmeboyhooters]

Might uhhhhhh fuck around and get my heart broken

[insuranceexplainedblog]

What is insurance?

To many it has become a dirty word conjuring up feelings and thoughts of mistrust, dishonesty, being taken advantage of, a rip off, a scam. Funny but when you Google “scam” it comes up with “an insurance scam”. This works both ways i.e. for you and for the insurance company. The insurance company thinks you are ripping them off when you want to claim, that you lied when you took out cover so they record everything you say. You most certainly have some feelings in this direction when they haggle over your claim by digging up anything and everything they can find to avoid paying it or to reduce what you (eventually) might get. Whatever happened to trust?– see below

To go back in time this thing called insurance started when people were honest and believed in their credo called “good faith”. You trusted them and they trusted you. That seems to have flown out the window. I’ll look at this in more detail later.

So it began a loooong time ago, a very long time ago, hundreds of years ago and yes you might think it hasn’t changed much since then because it is so out of date. As the commercial and industrial world developed so it created a need for certain protection.

One need was for ships and their cargo. There is some theory that at least a form of marine insurance began a couple of thousand years’ ago but the early English history of marine insurance goes to the Elizabethan Act of 1601 which is highly memorable as their first statute-book regarding marine insurance.

Another need was after the Great Fire of London, which occurred in 1666 destroying about half of London including St Paul’s Cathedral. Building insurance and then fire insurance was created. For the man who created it this was not solidarity but business pure and simple, to make money – not much has changed in that direction.

Then in the 1800’s with industrialisation through factories, railways and mining came the need for accident and other classes of insurance.

Then later at the end of the 1800’s and early into the 1900’s came motor insurance, third party and employers liability insurance and then aviation insurance and so on

We seem to have forgotten to meet the changing needs of the consumer because despite the dressing up with fancy bows, bells, added benefits, goodies and freebies, bonuses and all pretty things to attract you, the type of cover available hasn’t changed much over the last few decades.

Insurance is a contract (the policy) in which it says in return for a premium (your hard-earned bucks) an insurer indemnifies an entity (that’s you) against losses from specific events.

There are a couple of key words that might cause some confusion to the average person so I’ll try to explain.

An insurer according to the Insurance Act:

is registered or deemed to be registered as a short-term insurer, and is authorised to carry on the kind of short-term insurance business concerned, under this Act the object or result of which is that another person will enter into or enters into, or offers to enter into, renew or vary a short-term policy, other than a short-term reinsurance policy, in terms of which the first-mentioned person undertakes to provide policy benefits to the other person.

Difficult to read? That’s what it says! I hope you understand it. No offence to anyone if you don’t. You probably need a major in English language to get it.

Simply put an insurance company must be registered and authorised to provide insurance.

A premium is the amount you pay to the insurance company for the indemnity they provide.

Indemnity is said to be the compensation they pay  to put you in the same (financial) position after an event as you were  in before the event, so that you neither lose, nor profit. Hmmmm I’m not sure that actually happens but we can discuss that another time.

The specific events are extensive and somewhat technical so we can deal with those in another issue.

 The next article will give some amusing and satirical words from Lye Cheet and Steele Inc     

[oftimeandtwilight]

🙄 Is real life more important than roleplay or do you believe your partners made a commitment to write with you and should make good on it? and 🤦🏻‍♀️ How do you handle anon hate?

HOT TAKES OOC | @virtuousia​ | ACCEPTING

Is real life more important than roleplay or do you believe yourpartners made a commitment to write with you and should make goodon it?

Okay.... deep breath unpopular opinion time: it.... depends? 

See, like, both people are putting time and effort into a roleplay, you dig? And life happens and yes life should always come first! You should never neglect your mental health or school work or work or anything just to RP.

But here comes the dreaded but-

If you go into roleplaying... knowing that you won’t keep your commitments, knowing that you’ll vanish from your blog from lack of muse within a month, knowing that this is just a momentary fling of inspiration... I feel that’s a dick move. 

There are plenty of people who will disagree and I’m not like gonna come to your house and knock on your door and tell you you’re terrible if you do this, but this is why I have my policies set in place in regards to dropping partners. Real life is always more important but!! be respectful enough for your partners to know yourself and to not waste their time.

OOF i’m really worried people will read this and be like ‘wow she’s talking about me’ and I’m not. If I’m still rping with you, I’m not. But we’ve all encountered the partner that made their blog and wrote a starter and vanished and like... I hope you’re doing well buddy but I don’t think I’ll take you up on your offer to RP again in the future.

How do you handle anon hate?

HMMMM shockingly (genuinely, shockingly) I haven’t gotten any on this blog yet but I know my new way of handling it is blocking. I used to post it, used to take screenshots, but I realized that just... got them attention? And still gave them access to my blog.

So now I insta-block. Which sucks because you can’t un-block anons ever. Well-- sucks for the person slinging the hate, at least. And sucks because I just lost a partner because someone didn’t want to come to be off anon to talk about an issue they had but! 

[flying-elliska]

hi ellie! since you kinda enjoy this type of asks i'd like to know some things too. like if you are a foreigner living in the Netherlands, do Dutch people have some prejudices or something like that about you? since French people tend to do these things like you said

hi anon ! thanks for the question ! hmmmm….well every European country has its own version of xenophobia tbh…in the Netherlands it’s less noticeable (of course I’m talking about the big cities here, in the small villages it’s much worse). There is this general climate of tolerance and worldliness (esp in Amsterdam). But this is a tolerance that is mostly about ‘good business’ - after all discrimination diminishes profit and the Netherlands is a country of merchants at its very core. It doesn’t go very deep - it’s a ‘mind your own business and i’ll mind mine’ kind of tolerance, that is very much about politeness and not wanting to make waves. Scratch it and you can get some nasty surprises. I do think there is this ‘small country’ mindset of having to be open to the world for survival ; and I do think that people tend to be more open minded in general. BUT there is also this….kind of small-mindedness in a ‘we have our own little community together and you’re not part of it.’ I talked to a lot of expats that found it difficult to make Dutch friends because they’re often not that interested in you. In France there is this (hella problematic lol still) concept that you can be French if you learn the language and culture and pledge allegiance to the Republic or whatever. In the Netherlands, you have to adapt of course, but there is this baseline idea that you’ll never wholly be ‘one of us’, illustrated by the (hella racist) concept of ‘allochtoon’ which means ‘foreign-born’ and is still (way too much) used in policy as a way to mean ‘you know, those people’ without sounding outright racist. 

Plus Dutch people have this deeply rooted sense of …because they’re so tolerant and progressive blablabla, they don’t have to make an effort anymore or something, and they think they can teach other cultures how to do things properly etc. (The book ‘White Innocence’ from Gloria Wekker is a very interesting take on the subject btw). And it’s an issue (gay/minority rights have been backsliding, we’re getting behind on environmental issues, it’s impossible to have a conversation on racism, etc etc). They’re a lot less open to self criticism than French ppl sometimes lol. Again…pick your poison I guess.  

[becauseithrewgasandamatchonher]

So can’t message you for some reason, doesn’t work when I send a message so why don’t we put everything under a read me so it doesn’t get so damn long.

One:

You know what if you won’t take my word for it listen to James Grossman the Executive Director of the American Historical Association:

James Grossman, the executive director of the American Historical Association, says that the increase in statues and monuments was clearly meant to send a message.

"These statues were meant to create legitimate garb for white supremacy," Grossman said. "Why would you put a statue of Robert E. Lee or Stonewall Jackson in 1948 in Baltimore?"

(http://www.npr.org/2017/08/20/544266880/confederate-statues-were-built-to-further-a-white-supremacist-future)

Or Doctor Mark Elliot:

“All of those monuments were there to teach values to people,” Elliott says. “That’s why they put them in the city squares. That’s why they put them in front of state buildings.” Many earlier memories had instead been placed in cemeteries.

The values these monuments stood for, he says, included a “glorification of the cause of the Civil War.”

(http://www.history.com/news/how-the-u-s-got-so-many-confederate-monuments)

I know you like to use your opinion instead of sources but I’m excited to see how you explain this away or discredit these people. Especially the guy in charge of the American Historical Association.

 Two:

Oh yeah because few people on the left are burning stuff that suddenly means everyone who is left leaning is for that. Are you out of your fucking mind? This is fucking ridiculous you think they speak for the entirety of the Left?? Like show me facts. Show me statistics that it’s a wide spread thing on our side then maybe I’ll take these people seriously until then chill the fuck out.

Also let’s talk about this article in regards to colleges. First and foremost again with the misuse of freedom of speech unless you’re going to fight all the times students have gotten expelled from Universities for saying slurs and shit you really need to chill out with your problem you have with a University exercising their right to not allow someone on to the campus and people exercising their right to protest until they are heard.

There is a code of conduct at Universities and it’s beyond ridiculous if a school is okay with inviting someone that has said/done things that go against that code of conduct when if I a student did any of that I would be fucking expelled. Them bringing that person in shows what the schools values are before you say “well they aren’t students.” If I owned a school and decided I was going to let Sean Spencer [a neo nazi who has called for ethnic genocide] come speak to my students that would say something about myself and my schools values.

Ann Coulter has said some fucked up shit to include the homophobic word f*ggot. She’s said "We should invade their countries, kill their leaders, and convert them to Christianity." She’s said "I think the government should be spying on all Arabs, engaging in torture as a televised spectator sport, dropping daisy cutters wantonly throughout the Middle East and sending liberals to Guantanamo." She’s said “ Jews would be “perfected” once they became Christians.”

Do I need to keep going about the fucked up shit she has said? No one owes this woman a fucking platform she’s garbage. I read something once about how speech can be violent because of the effect it has on the body and the brain but there’s something that stands out to me:

The scientific findings I described above provide empirical guidance for which kinds of controversial speech should and shouldn’t be acceptable on campus and in civil society. In short, the answer depends on whether the speech is abusive or merely offensive.

Offensiveness is not bad for your body and brain. Your nervous system evolved to withstand periodic bouts of stress, such as fleeing from a tiger, taking a punch or encountering an odious idea in a university lecture.

Entertaining someone else’s distasteful perspective can be educational. Early in my career, I taught a course that covered the eugenics movement, which advocated the selective breeding of humans. Eugenics, in its time, became a scientific justification for racism. To help my students understand this ugly part of scientific history, I assigned them to debate its pros and cons. The students refused. No one was willing to argue, even as part of a classroom exercise, that certain races were genetically superior to others.

So I enlisted an African-American faculty member in my department to argue in favor of eugenics while I argued against; halfway through the debate, we switched sides. We were modeling for the students a fundamental principle of a university education, as well as civil society: When you’re forced to engage a position you strongly disagree with, you learn something about the other perspective as well as your own. The process feels unpleasant, but it’s a good kind of stress — temporary and not harmful to your body — and you reap the longer-term benefits of learning.

What’s bad for your nervous system, in contrast, are long stretches of simmering stress. If you spend a lot of time in a harsh environment worrying about your safety, that’s the kind of stress that brings on illness and remodels your brain. That’s also true of a political climate in which groups of people endlessly hurl hateful words at one another, and of rampant bullying in school or on social media. A culture of constant, casual brutality is toxic to the body, and we suffer for it.

That’s why it’s reasonable, scientifically speaking, not to allow a provocateur and hatemonger like Milo Yiannopoulos to speak at your school. He is part of something noxious, a campaign of abuse. There is nothing to be gained from debating him, for debate is not what he is offering.

On the other hand, when the political scientist Charles Murray argues that genetic factors help account for racial disparities in I.Q. scores, you might find his view to be repugnant and misguided, but it’s only offensive. It is offered as a scholarly hypothesis to be debated, not thrown like a grenade. There is a difference between permitting a culture of casual brutality and entertaining an opinion you strongly oppose. The former is a danger to a civil society (and to our health); the latter is the lifeblood of democracy.

By all means, we should have open conversations and vigorous debate about controversial or offensive topics. But we must also halt speech that bullies and torments. From the perspective of our brain cells, the latter is literally a form of violence.

(https://www.nytimes.com/2017/07/14/opinion/sunday/when-is-speech-violence.html?mcubz=1)

Now can you say that being anti-Semitic [Jewish people will be perfected by becoming Christian] calling for the invasion, murder and forced conversion to Christianity [man that has a long history of fucking up countries] saying that we should televise and condone torture AND drop fucking bombs [daisy cutters] throughout the Middle East isn’t fucking abusive and oppressive? I mean you could but it’s garbage.

Three:

I love that you left out what that statement was in reference to. You said no one who is affected by it cares which was a blatant lie and you’ve obviously ignored the copious amounts of NA that have called for this stuff to be removed.

Your facts were called bullshit because they didn’t support your original statement.

You do realize it doesn’t fucking matter if 4.7 million don’t care right? Those 520k+ NA still exist and they give a damn so your statement the people affected don’t care is a fucking lie and using that article to push your narrative that is fucking wrong makes it bullshit. It’s not because I don’t like evidence. It’s because the evidence you have provided is garbage and doesn’t support the statement YOU FUCKING MADE. You don’t get to fucking decide an issue doesn’t matter because the majority of said group doesn’t care about it.

  Four:

Nothing you said changes that the article detailed how to help the NA community. So either your article is good and the information is sound or it’s bad. You can’t pick and choose. You can’t use part of the articles information to back up your statement then trash the rest of it. Do you know how that makes a source look?

Doesn’t matter why you omitted it. The point remains it proved my point that the government was fucking the NA community over. Your source that you provided agrees that what the government is doing with the land [along with the cigerrets and the casinos] are hurting the community.

Hmmmm that’s fair the US has provided that but uhm just a quick thing:

 Since it was first established within the old U.S. War Department in 1824, the Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA) has distinguished itself as the most corrupt, ineffective and abusive agency in the federal government. Although the BIA now professes the greatest respect for "tribal sovereignty" and "tribal self-determination," there is precious little evidence of genuine concern for tribal autonomy in its administration of federal Indian policy as its recent illegal intervention into the internal affairs of the Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma substantiates. The overwhelming weight of evidence tells a very different story about BIA policy making. By any standard, the BIA is a colossal failure as a government agency and the dead weight of its administrative wreckage represents the single greatest obstacle to the freedom, prosperity, cultural integrity and progress of Native Americans. Until the BIA is abolished and federal Indian policy is fundamentally reformed, the future holds little promise of a significant change in the lives of Native Americans.

(http://www.cherokeeobserver.org/Issues/abolishbiapart2.html)

 Five:

I don’t use reddit. Ever. So like again I say just say the shit you wanna say so I don’t waste my fucking time responding to it??

 Six:

So the fact that they haven’t paid there bills somehow means they deserve to be living with dirty fucking pipes? They deserve the city officials to not fix the fucking pipes that a lot of them have been prosecuted over for their role in it?

The first thing that you said in this post was this: We’ve given you everything you want, but you just want more you greedy layabouts. So  you didn’t originally say anything about people only complaining on twitter. Try reading through your own statements.

Seven:

You know how you said that I was misquoting you [which I wasn’t lol] it’s nice to see you doing the same thing. Here’s what I said:

ALSO I don’t know if you know this but not everyone is able to go out and do the stuff I do whether it’s age, whether it’s economical, whether it’s because they have a disability of some sort so calling them a lay about is so many levels of wrong not to mention talking this stuff on the internet can and often does get people involved who can do stuff to do so. You discounting the power of words and the internet is illogical and just to ridiculous for words.

At no point did I say that no one out of the people I listed could go out in protests but the fact remains that for every child, poor person, disabled person that can go there’s someone that can’t so again you calling these people layabouts is fucking garbage, but I love that you think the links you provided mean EVERYONE in those particular communities can do something.

Eight:

Yes. It’s quite possible since you’re more likely to live in poverty if you were in poverty as a child (https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/rich-kids-stay-rich-poor-kids-stay-poor/) (http://www.nccp.org/publications/pub_911.html) (https://www.brookings.edu/blog/social-mobility-memos/2016/02/19/a-college-degree-is-worth-less-if-you-are-raised-poor/) (http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2014/06/the-long-shadow-poverty-baltimore-poor-children/) and having literally all your money, land and shit stripped away from is a sure fire way to put people in poverty if I ever saw one.

I honestly can’t expect much from someone that thinks institutional oppression doesn’t exist. I mean I can’t blame you for not understanding this “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” thing is garbage and has always been garbage

Nine:

Read the following: (http://www.aaihs.org/slavery-the-13th-amendment-and-mass-incarceration-a-response-to-patrick-rael/) (http://www.historyisaweapon.com/defcon1/gilmoreprisonslavery.html) (https://www.afsc.org/story/slavery-mass-incarceration) (https://www.democracynow.org/2016/10/3/from_slavery_to_mass_incarceration_ava) (https://eji.org/enslavement-to-mass-incarceration-museum) (http://racism.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=1470:institutionalized-slavery&catid=137&Itemid=155&showall=1&limitstart=)

 Also let’s talk about your articles

The one talking about Black leaders: I’m all for admitting there were other circumstances as well but the idea that the war on drugs wasn’t to attack Black communities (http://jezebel.com/nixons-policy-advisor-admits-he-invented-war-on-drugs-t-1766359595) or that drugs weren’t funneled into the community (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/10/gary-webb-dark-alliance_n_5961748.html) is factually incorrect.

Also there being other contributing factors to Mass Incarceration doesn’t suddenly mean it didn’t start with slavery.  That’s not how that works.

The first article:

Is the fact that Black politicians are on board with this and that there’s some racist black guy trying to put Black people in more economic poverty supposed to prove anything?

 Ten:

Have you ever experienced poverty? Have you ever experienced being so poor you can’t feed your own children [due to racism in the job market and a slew of other things] that you turn to crime to feed said children? If the choice is between starvation for yourself and your children and committing a crime that’s not a real choice.

One I didn’t bring the law in to this [despite the fact there are numerous racist legal practices] but I’m glad you can recognize that stuff from 100 years ago can affect today albeit even if you’re saying so in just a legal capacity. But please tell me how your comment is right but mine is wrong when I say stuff from 100+ years ago can affect people today?

 Eleven:

We are having a debate/argument/discussion whatever you want to call it and while you are right it’s not a research paper when you do this stuff you need to have your fact straight.

 For example I haven’t gotten stuff wrong here that’s fine but nothing I’ve gotten wrong has presented me as a possible racist liar [your own actions even if they were by accident are the same actions that racist people have done. People I’ve had this conversation with before so if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it’s a duck until I know otherwise. AGAIN that was your fault. My initial evaluation of you was your own fault.]

 Twelve:

Don’t really care. If I’ve got the facts to back me up I’ll cuss all I want especially when it’s about topics that directly affect me and others like me. If you allow my insults to detract from the facts that’s something YOU need to work on not me because even if you had cussed me out I still would have read your sources and I would have replied to them in kind.

If my argument is supported by facts and you think me being mean to you delegitimizes my argument that is supported by facts that means you don’t care about the facts because someone was mean to you. People need to stop using people being mean to them as a way to negate facts.

 Thirteen:

So I realized I didn’t actually link my source apparently lol?? I thought I did so that’s on me but it was a list of articles from google talking about the issue but I already know we are gonna run into this problem again later down so I’ll save what I am going to say for then.

 Fourteen:

So all you’ve got is your opinions didn’t I say don’t bother responding if you couldn’t give me something other than your opinion?

However there is something I will address. Yes we commit more violent crimes I won’t ever deny that because I know it’s a fact. I frequently use those FBI tables in conversations. What I will say though is violent crimes doesn’t encompass everything so let’s talk about that other stuff:

Even more surprising is what gets left out of the chart: Blacks are far more likely to be arrested for selling or possessing drugs than whites, even though whites use drugs at the same rate. And whites are actually more likely to sell drugs:

Whites were about 45 percent more likely than blacks to sell drugs in 1980, according to an analysis of the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth by economist Robert Fairlie. This was consistent with a 1989 survey of youth in Boston. My own analysis of data from the 2012 National Survey on Drug Use and Health shows that 6.6 percent of white adolescents and young adults (aged 12 to 25) sold drugs, compared to just 5.0 percent of blacks (a 32 percent difference).

This partly reflects racial differences in the drug markets in black and white communities. In poor black neighborhoods, drugs tend to be sold outdoors, in the open. 

 (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/09/30/white-people-are-more-likely-to-deal-drugs-but-black-people-are-more-likely-to-get-arrested-for-it/?utm_term=.1797b7e3e9ef)

To compound on this cops just don’t seem to care about white people doing this stuff. (https://www.aclu.org/issues/mass-incarceration/smart-justice/war-marijuana-black-and-white) (https://privacysos.org/blog/there-goes-your-overtime-cop-explains-why-police-dont-target-powerful-whites-in-drug-enforcement/) The CIA definitely didn’t care when they were targeting Black people and Hippies.

Not to mention white people are now calling for a gentler war on drugs now because of a fucking heroin crisis (https://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/31/us/heroin-war-on-drugs-parents.html?mcubz=1) but I mean fuck the Black community right? Let’s support laws that put them in jail (http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/science/2014/08/racial_bias_in_criminal_justice_whites_don_t_want_to_reform_laws_that_harm.html)

 Black people are more likely to have their cars searched despite the fact that they find more illegal stuff on white people (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2015/10/27/police-are-searching-black-drivers-more-often-but-finding-more-illegal-stuff-with-white-drivers-2/?utm_term=.e402ec8667c4)

Black people are more likely to be stopped and frisked despite the fact that white people carry more contraband (https://thinkprogress.org/white-people-stopped-by-new-york-police-are-more-likely-to-have-guns-or-drugs-than-minorities-9bf579a2b9b3/)

And there’s this too: (https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2016/07/data-police-racial-bias)

So that information about violent crime doesn’t suddenly fix everything.

ALSO Black people are more likely to be in poverty so there’s a racial aspect to all of this isn’t if it isn’t the single contributing factor. One of the reasons is probably this: (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2915472/) or this: (http://www.epi.org/publication/african-americans-are-paid-less-than-whites-at-every-education-level/)

 Fifteen:

Columbus was also trash and his statues need to be removed and Columbus day should be replaced with Indigenous People’s Day [it’s already happening but all of America needs to get with the times] again books, museums and mandatory curriculums exist that’s not gonna change.

Have you heard anyone call for the removal of museums that are about educating people? I know for a fact that the African American History and Heritage Museum has a section about Civil War and there’s no way people would remove that. Now a museum glorifying the actions of the Confederate sure remove it. History like that should be remembered not glorified.

Educating isn’t glorifying and if you can’t tell the difference between those two words I can’t help you. NOT TO FUCKING MENTION it’s the people that are supporting this shit that are ALL FOR revising ACTUAL HISTORY BOOKS that teach kids about this stuff. We aren’t the ones doing what you’re accusing us of. The right is.

  Sixteen:

Soooo you’re against pedophilic material being censored since no one should be forcibly censored? I mean that’s cool…I guess….I can’t even.

Now obviously, I don’t actually believe you believe that but your stance is no censorship is good but if you budge that means in certain circumstances it is. So who are you to decide what those circumstances are? Mine reasons are based off the racist history of the statues and their continued presence in a society that claims to be post racial/racism

 Seventeen:

So I’ve already proven that you’re wrong about why those statues were put up from two very reliable sources but I am eager to see how you plan to discredit them or if you’re even gonna bother providing sources and are going to use your opinion again which will not hold up to that.

Anyway those statues were put up to glorify the reasons the south seceded [racism along many other things] and to terrorize Black people. It wasn’t solely about memorializing their fallen [I’ll agree that was part of the reason] but like that part shouldn’t matter since the racism is quite clear now. At least to anyone that cares about sources.

 Eighteen:

Things happened in the past that effect the present [which you agreed with] and therefore reconciliation should be made.

Also you didn’t have a single source to back up your opinions so you saying it’s not real doesn’t mean shit to me because your opinion doesn’t mean shit without fucking sources. Your word isn’t fucking fact.

OH MY GOD yes because a Black man managed to do that with some KKK members that means they can all have that happen? Didn’t you get “mad” at me earlier for something along these lines? You are a joke if you think the people he convered represent the entitirety of the population of the KKK which is said to be 3000 people (http://www.epi.org/publication/african-americans-are-paid-less-than-whites-at-every-education-level/) We don’t even have a number of how many people he converted but you wanna use that as proof that all these racist fucks aren’t gonna stay that way?

Fine I will change my stance THE MAJORITY OF THESE FUCKS will continue to be the way they are unless there are serious consequences for the fucking behavior whether it’s getting expelled from college, losing their job or someone beating the ever living shit out of them. This is not me saying I condone violence but my point stands.

 Nineteen:

Do you realize the KKK have been marching around the US before this? Do you realize the Nazism and all that was on the rise before this happened? Also when it comes to PoC people claim the victim narrative is bullshit but let it be the KKK and Neo-Nazis all of a sudden it’s got legitimacy that’s racist bullshit.

Their beliefs don’t change facts. Their history is racist. The KKK is racist. Neo-Nazism is racist. The Confederacy seceded for multiple reasons but one of them was RACISM. The fact that people are claiming to agree with them is just more proof that our country is racist but of course no one will go for that because these people are the actual ones trying to erase fucking history.

Things aren’t always black and white. Things don’t always happen because of racism but you acting like systematic oppression doesn’t exist is factually incorrect, moronic and doesn’t help shit in tearing down these systems in order to help people.

REMINDER: PUT YOUR RESPONSE UNDER A READ MORE

[justinstares]

European Commission copyright expert didn’t know that The Guardian gives away news for free

Giuseppe Abbamonte, European Commission director for media policy, is a fan of The Guardian. The EU copyright law Mr Abbamonte  oversees is designed to help “save quality journalism” as exemplified by the British paper and website, he told a European Parliament gathering on February  8. “If the Guardian were to cease operations it would be really sad,” he said. Its disappearance under a deluge of red ink would be a loss to society, especially in this era of “fake news”.

In response to pleas from loss-making mainstream media, the Brussels executive has hatched a plan. New EU legislation will strengthen the hand of publishers when negotiating with “platforms”, the gathering heard. It will become easier to sue platforms - such as news aggregators - for copyright infringement.

Leaving Brexit aside for the moment (many in Brussels are still in denial), how will the EU law help save The Guardian when the publisher gives its news away for free, I asked? Does The Guardian seriously now hope to make Facebook pay when a user shares an article with his or her friends?

To which Mr Abbamonte said: “I didn’t know they give away their news for free. I will check with them tomorrow.”

Hmmmm.....

How can he possibly not know? Isn’t this proposal designed to save the Guardian? Mr Abbamonte might be reading the hardcopy in the Exki café on Schuman roundabout, though that’s not ideal as there can’t be more than one. Is this official actually writing internet copyright legislation when all the time he gets his news from his own Guardian dead tree subscription?

Probably not. The likelihood is that Mr Abbamonte is reading Guardian articles in the Commission’s internal press review, which is widely circulated. The Commission is itself a news aggregator, and is no doubt infringing its own copyright legislation every day.

After the parliament powwow, a lobbyist from Burson-Marsteller took issue with my question. “The Guardian isn’t free,” she said. “OK, readers don’t pay, but the page has advertising”.

!!

I often have the impression that the European parliament inhabits a parallel universe. 

Earlier that same day, The Guardian’s legal counsel was escorted around Brussels with another lobbyist. The plan, the lobbyist tells me, is indeed to somehow make Facebook pay, but the The Guardian is worried that if they ask for actual money, Facebook will simply drop them. FB is more important to the Guardian than the other way around.

This is madness. The Commission can’t touch non-EU aggregators such as Drudge. One-man bands in Europe can easily relocate to a server in Liberia. This legislation will be impossible to enforce. 

My only conclusion is that the Commission’s real target is Google News (everyone denies this, so there might be something to it). And even then, how much of a problem really are news aggregators?

You can bet that by the time the EU proposal becomes law, the internet will have moved on and the text will be completely irrelevant.

[useyourwordspodcast]

The code that launched a worldwide lockdown and the bugs that made it problematic

We are in some weird times in the world right now. We have various states and countries in various stages of re-opening and venturing out from the corona pandemic -and just when things started to seem to calm down some - the tragic killing of George Floyd took place on May 25th. Now - I am not going to talk in depth about this - the situation is still unfolding - but I do want to say this on behalf of myself - and while I did not run this by Josh or Aaron, I doubt they would argue with this.

How George Floyd died was tragic, and all those involved should face appropriate repercussions. His death was something where justice needs to be served against every person involved in his death - a death that was needless. That being said - there are many aspects of this which may not have been revealed yet to the public - but pressure for justice should continue. However, justice does not involve destruction of property. I'm glad to see that there are a lot of protests which are being done peacefully - they may cause inconvenience but for the most part are peaceful and following the law. There are always going to be those bad apples that make the rest of the groups look bad - but for a lot of these groups these disruptors are definitively in (not necessarily of) the minority. That being said - some of the groups that are violent, that are causing property damage, that are harming and attacking others - these groups are not protesting in the spirit of George Floyd and are taking advantage of the social disturbance going on right now. There will always be those who take advantage of a situation - and those that are taking advantage should not be aligned with those protesting peacefully.

Now with that out of the way let's get on with the topic at hand.

It's now the end of May when I am recording this - and life relating to Corona is starting to get back to normal for a lot of people. Businesses are opening back up - even at reduced capacity - but they are still opening. People are still wearing masks around stores when they go out, but the number seems to be going down on almost a daily basis. But as life starts to return to normal, I started to dig into something that had caught my attention a little while ago. At the start of the pandemic, we heard about computer models that indicated that if nothing was done, there was the potential for up to 2.2 million people in the United States and up to half a million people in the United Kingdom that would die from the Corona Virus. Again - this is if nothing was done. This lead to leaders around the world forming the policies that were implemented. I will admit - at the start when we had no information on how the virus spread/infected/killed/etc, the prudent thing to implement things such as closing down large groups, social gatherings, etc was a wise move. However we continued to hear new and new model results based on the changes we made - and the models continued to show large number of deaths even with social distancing. That was interesting to me, how these deaths continued to remain high even when we took the recommended precautions - and just chalked it up to normal models needing refinement over time. Then there was new about Neil that broke (and not the news regarding his affair - that does not impact this) and the code that he created to model the deaths of various pandemics and how bad it was. Now that caused me to cock my head some and say "hmmmm..."

For those who are unfamiliar with my background - I am a scripter and IT automation person by trade. 99.99% of my professional life I write code in PowerShell for mostly Windows based systems. I have spoken at conferences and user groups relating on the topic of PowerShell, and have passed community exams stating I know what I'm doing. I'm not doing this to toot my own horn, but to say here are my credentials. It is a fair question to ask for the bonafides of someone who is criticizing something and I'm also doing this to intercept people who will try to dismiss my opinion on this because "he don't know what he is talking about." Even though I am not a full time "real" programmer - I use proper programming techniques for all the scripts I write - and while I am not an expert in C or Fortran I know enough to be able to read the code and comment on the structure of code as well as general coding practices. I was also taught in college how to read the overall syntax of a program, even if I don't know the ins and outs of the language itself

So the code.

The code used to generate the model has been used multiple times in the past with various diseases - with bad results each time. Let's take a look at some of the past things this code has gotten wrong:

During the 2001 outbreak of Foot And Mouth Disease, his model was used to justify the death of around at least six million sheep and cattle. The model also predicted up to 150,000 people would die - with a death rate of less then 200 deaths.

In 2002, it was predicted that up to 50,000 people would die from Mad Cow Disease in beef in the UK. There were 117 deaths.

In 2005, it was predicted that up to 150 million people would die from the bird flu. In the end only 282 people died worldwide between the years 2003 - 2009.

In 2009 a "reasonable worst case scenario" for swine flue deaths was be around 65,000 deaths in the UK, there were only 457 deaths.

One would reasonably expect the models and code to be further refined and updated as time went on. The early models can easily be excused as you can think of them as version 1.0 of the code, but from 2001 to 2009, there should have been bug fixes done which made the model more reliable - but it wasn't. Why is that?

Well one issue of the code - which is documented on the official gitlhub site - is the fact that the code is stochastic. What is stochastic your asking?

randomly determined; having a random probability distribution or pattern that may be analyzed statistically but may not be predicted precisely.

In other words - it is impossible to run unit tests against this code. What is a unit test? Unit tests, in the most simple of terms, is with input a, output b should be returned each time. So if I provide the code with the number "1" after it finishes doing what it does - I should get the value of "6" each time. This is considered a standard with all code, showing that new bugs have not been introduced since the last update was done. The unit tests will be done on individual segments as well as the whole code base. In my line of work, before code can be promoted to production it must pass all the unit tests. If the unit tests fail then the code is rejected and it needs to be worked on again. One of the documented issues with this code is that if the same inputs are given to the code, each run will result in different results meaning it passes one of the most basic pieces of quality control. This is a big red flag for me. Now thankfully, since the code went live on github, a switch has been added to allow for the code to produce the same results with the same input - but reading through the issue log - this does not work 100% of the time still and has some bugs that need to be worked out still.

The next issue with the code is that it is hardware dependent. It does not need to be run on a specific computer (this would be a horrible solution) but instead has to be run on a single core system. Back when the code was originally written(13 years ago) this made sense - as dual core was still a relatively new thing and making code run across multiple cores was a tricky endeavor. However in the past few years, almost all major languages have made it easier to write programs to run across multiple cores. The fact that the code returns different results based on the number of cores is a cause for concern in case the code was not run correctly. In fact, even with the update to allow better tests, it calls out that in order for the same results to be returned each time not only do you need to use the same inputs (which is to be expected) but you must also use the exact same number of threads otherwise it cannot be tested. Strike 2.

The next issue is more a personal opinion on coding style - but is based on best standards. The original code (which no one outside of a few places has access to) was all one 15 thousand line long file. All of the code was contained in the one file, making it hard to scroll through. Proper coding techniques states that each function be contained in it's own file. This makes it easier to debug, update, and test. Now since the uproar of the code initially came up, the code was sent to Microsoft where they spent about a month working on refactoring the code to clean it up. For those of you who are not coders - refactor literally means to restructure. It too even Microsoft (and supposedly other companies) a good month to restructure the code to try to make it easier to update.

The third strike for the code relates directly to the code itself. While no one is providing direct answers - the code itself lends to the fact that the code was automatically translated from Fortran to C. Now there is nothing wrong with moving code from one system to another, but when you use a computer to automatically translate code from one programming language to another you have to be careful as the translation - while it does accelerate what is going on - is not fool proof and may introduce logic bugs/errors into the code that needs to be corrected manually. The fact that there are still artifacts in the code which point to the translation from Fortran gives me pause to wonder if all the necessary elements have been updated appropriately. One example of this is found in the issues log for the code on GitHub. There is an issue where the code uses a method which is old and returns back data which is not expected resulting in errors and rounding errors.

Thankfully the updated version of the code was finally released on Github were people are able to audit and contribute to it - so going forward I have a lot more hope in the code getting more accurate and giving better results - but the fact that we have so much policy based on code like this is scary - to say the least.

In fact, I'm not alone in thinking this. David Richards - co-founder of WanDisco recently was interviewed about the code quality. David is qualified to speak on this issue as well - since WanDisco is a company that specializes in writing code for distributed systems. According to David, the code was a "buggy mess that looks more like a bowl of angel hair pasta than a finely tuned piece of programming" and even added "In our commercial reality we would fire anyone for developing code like this and any business that relied on it to produce software for sale would likely go bust." David also brings up the concern that testing would be difficult on the original code, "Testing allows for guarantees. It is what you do on a conveyer belt in a car factory. Each and every component is tested for integrity in order to pass strict quality controls."

Another issue with the code was the base assumptions. The original code was written to handle flu viruses, not corona viruses. Even though the code can model the spread of corona viruses, it does so based on the assumptions of flu viruses. The assumptions had not been updated to handle the corona type viruses, as was confirmed by Neal. The basic assumptions of the models are inherently different - and the fact that these changes were not disclosed at the start when the original predictions were made is frightening.

Now I am not saying that we should get rid of the code base fully and start over. The fact that the code is now on GitHub and can be audited, updated, and changed in public is a good thing. More people are able to review the code, provide updates, feedback, and push back on the issues with testing and reproducibility of the results. In fact now that the code is being done in an open source framework, it has the possibility to only get more accurate as time goes on - and this is a good thing. But the fact that it took people to start questioning things before we were allowed to see the code on which so many policies were made, is scary. And is also a lesson in why we should always at least ask questions about the data used to make policies. I'm not saying be skeptical and conspiratorial - but when data is used to upend millions of peoples lives - we should at least take a look at how the model was generated, the assumptions used, and the quality of the code used to produce it.

Links

https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/forget-ferguson-s-personal-failures-it-s-his-science-that-needs-scrutiny

https://www.armstrongeconomics.com/world-news/corruption/i-have-reviewed-fergusons-code/

https://www.nationalreview.com/corner/professor-lockdown-modeler-resigns-in-disgrace/

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2020/05/16/coding-led-lockdown-totally-unreliable-buggy-mess-say-experts/

https://www.breitbart.com/tech/2020/05/11/epidemiologist-slams-disgraced-u-k-scientists-coronavirus-model-grave-scientific-misconduct/

https://lockdownsceptics.org/code-review-of-fergusons-model/ - this one needs to be taken with caution

https://twitter.com/ID_AA_Carmack/status/1254872369556074496

https://github.com/mrc-ide/covid-sim

https://www.westernjournal.com/software-developers-tear-apart-infamous-model-started-lockdowns/

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8327641/Coronavirus-modelling-Professor-Neil-Ferguson-branded-mess-experts.html