#pray for me ig 🫡

[beiasluv]

grid of in-laws | o. piastri (81)

a/n: im thai, so definitely not self-inserting here 🤭

yn_albon

liked by oscarpiastri, lilymhe and 86,107 others

yn_albon mum and dad 🤷‍♀️

view all 14,186 comments

lilymhe my baby 😘

yn_albon 🫶🫶

alex_albon remember I always have the pictures

yn_albon 😔 I’m sorry my dearest brother

username hello?? What pictures??

username don’t be shy, tell usss

username Oscar, what are you doing here??

username he’s trying to rizz her up or what?

username im praying that they are dating

username BROTHER what are you high on?

username TELL ME YOU DONT HAVE TWITTER

username yall think that if they’re not dating, oscar’s gonna be a creep and like all of her pics for nothing?

username MOST men do that. Oscar’s my pookie tho

username yeah, exactly. dating.

yn_albon’s private story

reply

alex_albon: don’t you think it’s time for a public story? 🙄

: im going to combust from embarrassment

alex_albon: please, when lily posted me-

: you jumped around the room and kicked your legs. I know 😔

alex_albon: yeah, time to think about it. also, call mum tonight

: mkayy

lilymhe

tokyo, japan

liked by yn_albon, alex_albon and 127,041 others

lilymhe the albons’ lost in tokyo!!

view 34,617 comments

yn_albon we’re all lost 😔

alex_albon says the one with your own japanses translator

yn_albon yeah, can’t hear you

username EXCUSE ME??

username OSCAR???

yn_albon 🫶🫶

alex_albon back off🤺🤺

lilymhe she’s just my baby 😔

username EXCUSE ME? Who can speak japanse in the gird? Oscar mf piastri

username exactly what I was thinking!!

username yuki rn 🧍‍♂️

username didn’t oscar and lando went out in tokyo today as well???

username FUCKING HELL YES HELLO? I’M HAVING AN ASTHMA ATTACK

landonorris

tokyo, japan

liked by mclaren, yn_albon and 782,106 others

landonorris lost in japan 👊

view all 185,106 comments

alex_albon copying each other’s pose kings

liked by yn_albon

landonorris tbf, it wasn’t taken by the same person 🤷‍♂️

oscarpiastri i called that pose first

georgerussell63 nice food mate 👊

landonorris nah, they didn’t get me

username THEY WHO? Oscar and who??

username tell me SOMETHING i DONT know

username so we’re all here from lily’s post huh 😭

username yn liked the post 🤷‍♀️

username wait, YN AND LANDO FOLLOW EACH OTHER??

username she’s pretty close with the 2019 rookies ig

yn_albon

chinatown, bangkok

liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon and 76,127 others

yn_albon we ate ✌️💅

view all 21,701 comments

alex_albon thanks for copying my pose, be original 👊

yn_albon lily come get yo man please

lilymhe right away 🫡

landonorris good food 🙌

yn_albon still can’t make you try fish 😔

landonorris sorry, it’s never happening 🤷‍♂️

username please tell me yn brought oscar with her 😭

username white boy getting dragged to asian street food by his gf, my favorite trope

username *and traumatizing him

yn_albon I swear I fed him the right food 😔😭

username SHUT UP GUYES ITS CONFIRMED

username yn feed my boy pad thai

username naur that’s basic asf 😭

alex_albon

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri and 510,418 others

alex_albon back home with my favourite person and some thai local i guess 🤷‍♂️ (jk, love you both)

view all 218,177 comments

yn_albon yeah, love you too 🤺

lilymhe you don’t play mermaids with us 👎

yn_albon right??? I’m sorry for not training him harder 😔✊

alex_albon i apologise 😭

username boooo, alexxxx

username oscar has been real quiet since the bangkok post??

username SO lando went with them which only makes sense if oscar ALSO went with them yk??

username I KNOW what y’all are thinking

oscarpiastri

phuket, thailand

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 751,168 others

oscarpiastri thanks to a local guide 🇹🇭

view all 386,109 comments

username ITS FUCKING OFFICIAL OSCAR POSTING

username sad day to be an oscar fan 😔

username GOOD DAY to be an oscaryn shipper

username shut UP is that yn??

username YES‼️ where have you been???

username alex just posted them going to phuket, so 2+2 🤷‍♀️

username i mean he already went out to tokyo with the albons, so what’s the chance

yn_albon

liked by alex_albon, lilymhe and 282,156 others

yn_albon golfing or we balling‼️

view all 98,716 comments

landonorris Oscar is literally 🧍‍♂️

yn_albon exactly

oscarpiastri I am not a professional golfer 🤷‍♂️

alex_albon who won??

yn_albon you😔

yn_albon only because lily is not playing 🤷‍♀️

username PUT HIM BACK SIS!!

lilymhe

liked by yn_albon, alex_albon and 96,267 others

lilymhe serious dinner…

view all 17,817 comments

alex_albon very serious indeed…

yn_albon what are y’all on about? 😭

username PLEASE IS THIS THE IN-LAWS DINNER WE WERE BEGGING FOR

username ‘serious dinner’ my ASS 😭

yn_albon

liked by georgerussell63, landonorris and 396,691 others

yn_albon race week dump ig 😦

view all 91,178 comments

alex_albon ITS HAPPENING

landonorris WHAT IS HAPPENIF

landonorris WHY IS OSCAR JUMPIN

landonorris OH.

username george, blink if you’re the third wheel

username NAH LOGAN AS WELL 😭

oscarpiastri

liked by landonorris, logansargeant and 627,182 others

oscarpiastri guess we did have a dinner..

comments on this post have been limited

yn_albon’s story | oscarpiastri’s story

reply

alex_albon: THANK GOD

the longest one yet. it took me so long because I keep undoing and editing (perfectionist af)

request is open-ish because I’m done with exams!! jenson dilf incoming?? 😬

anyways, hope y’all enjoyed it. like, reblog, COMMENT, or anything if you liked it. If not, y’all better lock yo door.

today’s a good day to take care of yourself!!

[csainz5]

hello! i saw your requests were open and wanted to pop in! i have a bit of a weird? idk request, where it’s like max verstappen x reader first where it ends with angst, and then she ends w carlos endgame?? maybe a whole lotta lover boy feels from carlos and ‘oh i fucked up something great’ feels from max, like essentially carlos that has been silently lining throughout readers relationship w max too?? i’m so sorry if this confused you! i loved ur previous carlos sainz fic!! 🤍🤍

BLOOD FLOWS RED

genre: fluff; light smut

pairing: bestfriend!max x reader; carlos x reader

summary: max constantly fucking up comes in no better time for carlos.

word count: 3.7k (my longest fic so far 💀)

warnings: angst, slight loverboy feels from max if you squint. voyeur max? not really but kinda ig and no beta we die like the ferrari fans we are 🫡 google translate ass spanish, forgive me 😞🫶

author notes: OMG ANON YOU ARE A GENIUS!!! I LOVED THIS REQUEST AND I HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING IT. but small change tho, max x reader isn’t rlly like a proper relationship. anyways, hope u guys enjoy 😘😘😘

you were both 10 when you first met. your parents had been friends for a while by then, and they decided that they would place you and max in the same school. the two of you instantly kicked it off. it was like you guys were meant to be friends. you always shared the same opinions, the same preferences and all.

school with max was fun. the best, infact. the both of you hit it off well since the first time you met and had been inseperable (and insufferable) since. it was practically known to everyone that if max were to take a seat, the one beside it instantly belonged to you. you two had different friend circles, yes. But you were definitely each others best friend regardless.

highschool. highschool was a turning point in your friendship. although it was still as magical as it was, max’s attention at that time drifted between girls and racing. the former, burnt your heart with jealousy. everytime he ditched plans with you for his new girlfriend, you secretly prayed to god they would break up so you could have him all to yourself. The latter however, you didnt mind so much. you were always a fan of racing, and it only bought you two closer. you still remember go karting with max like it was yesterday. even if he was always the one to win, you weren’t too far behind, always coming it right after him. your deepest secrets, your highs and lows, your intrests, and everything about you was known to max, and max only. everyone would see you with him all the time, so no guys would ever approach you in school. Its not like you really minded it though, because max’s girlfriends only ever lasted two weeks at the most, and you guys would find your way back to each other.

You found solace in the unwavering friendship you shared with Max . Growing up together, navigating the twists and turns of life side by side, your bond evolved into something deeper over the years. You were always hopelessly in love with Max, but you concealed your feelings, afraid of risking the precious friendship you had cherished oh so much. Everyone but max could see it. I mean how couldnt they? you were always like a lost puppy around the paddock, finding your way to max. Much like your races, you would always find your way right behind him. it was clear in the way you looked at him, with stars in your eyes. How your voice went slightly higher when you were around him. How you relax when you’re with him. How you’re the loudest person during a race, always screaming his name as he raced by. Everyone felt sorry for you, really. Because in return to all of your affections was nothing but a cold and stoic response. Don’t get me wrong, Max definitely loved spending time with you, probably moreso than anyone else, but it was nothing in comparison to your admiration for him.

Afterall, in the world of Formula 1, where speed and competition reigned supreme, there was so space for screw ups. you needed to work hard for what you want and you needed to be cunning. and for max, nothing was as important as winning this year’s championship and more to come, so you’ve become used to his behaviour. he was quick, ruthless and on the top, and he wasn’t about to let anything get in the way of his success. so even though it stung when you could see how little you mattered to him over the sport, you convinced yourself it was okay. Because this was max’s dream since he was little, and whats a wish to date a boy over a pursuit for the championship but a speck of dust.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, you watched Max prepare for yet another exhilarating race. Your heart raced in sync with the roaring engines, anticipation filling the air. Deep down, you yearned for Max to realize the depths of your affection, but maybe it was too much to ask for, you think. He was always too caught up in his relentless pursuit of victory. Everyone saw it, even the rugged and striking driver of ferrari, with the number 55 adorned on his red suit.

Max insisted you leave him alone for a moment, so he could gather his thoughts before the race. “Are you sure, max?” “please, just go” reluctantly, you agreed and went into the paddock club. you settle into the couch and wallow to yourself. you just wanted to be there with him so you could calm his nerves, why was he acting unlike himself? you gather that recently this is all thats been happening. you always go behind him, wanting to be with him at all times, hoping to be the centre of his attention, but he stands like a stonewall. you’ve grown tired of it really. But come on, you knew you would find your way back to him again. You were infact in love with him since you knew what love was, weren’t you?

You get startled when a hand waves in front of your face “helloo?” “oh my god im so sorry” “no worries” he shoots you a cheeky smile. “did you need anything carlos?” “nothing, i just wanted to ask if i could sit by you” “yeah ofcourse, you didnt need to ask” honestly, this was the most you’ve ever spoken with carlos, so you were confused by his sudden intrest in you. but really, it wasn’t sudden at all. too absorbed into the grumpy redbull driver, you never noticed a tall figure clad in red lurk behind you two. He had seen it all. His eyes burned with rage everytime he saw you with max. What did he ever do to deserve you?

“Carlos? mate where the hell were you? you need to come to the garage, hurry up” charles says, appearing out of thin air “i’ll see you later, okay?” “Bye sainz” Looking back at you, carlos runs away behind the monagasque. you smile to yourself at the sudden attention from carlos. Atleast he distracted you, right?

yeah right. your nerves were all over the place the second the red lights blinked, and the race began. max was so off his game today, whats wrong with him? he was so far behind this race that even the alfa romeo cars had been ahead of him. it was his first race lately where he was behind a ferrari for once. you felt your heart thump as you wince, you know how much shit redbull & max’s father give him on the offchance that he isnt the best in the game. he didn’t deserve it, you think. he doesn’t deserve the shit they put him through. since this was the start of the season, everyone was very anticipated to see the result, to see who is going to be this years leading drivers.

you catch your eyes drifting towards one specific car though, and its not the redbull one you’ve always got your eyes on. the person leading the first race of the season happens to be the man that youve last talked to. carlos. you hold your breath, and blink for just a moment and there you see it, carlos gets the pole position. you dont know whether to be happy or not, a feeling you’re unfamiliar with makes your gut twinge. were you happy with the results? as much as you’d like to convince yourself otherwise, it was true. for some reason carlos winning made you feel proud, but in a split second you turn your eyes back to the circuit. max had gotten p7.

it was the night of that day that max had seen you under a different light. your look for the party had caught the eyes of everyone there, and unfortunately for max, even the eyes of a certain latino were set on you. Carlos was the first person you noticed the moment you stepped into the club. the ferrari pair had rented out the entire club for that night, celebrating their p1 & p2 standings. you instinctively go towards Carlos, talking him up about his big win. “Sainz, that overtake on lap 35? Blew my mind.” “you must’ve been attentive on me to catch that” he jokes, his chest rumbling with laughter. “oh come on everyone’s talking about it” “maybe. but so are you, and thats not very common” “I give credit where credit is due, what can i say?” you giggle, taking a flute of champagne. “hey, how come you aren’t with max? i ask only because this is the first time you’ve come outside that circle” he asks, slightly avoiding eye contact with you. “well, i guess you could say i just found someone more worthy of my time” “Oh..?” clearly amused with your answer, carlos decided that he’s not going to let you leave his side. He had a taste of it, and he knew he couldn’t let go just yet.

2 drinks become 4, and 4 drinks become 8 when you decide that you are done being the quiet girl behind max. you think that it’s time that you let go, live the moment for yourself, and yourself only. okay, and maybe Carlos too. conversations with him were just so light and breezy, you didnt have to hold yourself back hoping you’d be molded into the kind of girl he wants. it was obvious that he was interested in you as is. “Carlos” “yes, cariño?” “How come ive never spoken to you before?” “You know, actually you have” he wasn’t wrong, but that was just small talk at events. This? This was different. you knew it. He knew it. “No, no i mean like.. this” you say, speech slurred, hand reaching to brush his hair. “You’re driving me crazy, mi vida” he chokes out, eyes closed and a sigh escaping his lips. “Carlos..” you feel like you cant breath as you say, “Help me forget him” by this point of your conversation you had realised that he did, infact notice things about you. Maybe even in a way no one else did. you raise your eyes to meet his and you lose yourself in their charm. his brown eyes with specks of gold drew you in more than you’d like to admit. “Hermosa, when you have me,” he raises your chin up “You will be sober when you have me, and you wont be forgetting it any time soon”wind gets caught up in your throat at his bold statement.

“Come on, let loose carlos join me!!” by this point it was the alcohol talking, not you. “okay okay how about we get you home now?” “oh shut up im just getting started” “no you’re not, come with me” carlos says as he throws your arm around his shoulder to support you. “fuck, is she okay man? i can take her to her house just leave her with me” max say’s, finally emerging after eyeing you both all night. “don’t hold your breath mate, she’s going home with me”

you wake up the next morning with the worst headache, which only gets worse when you realise you can’t recognise the room you’re in and the clothes you’re wearing aren’t yours. you shoot your head up as you hear the door open. Carlos? wait a second. did you and he..? “Carlos, did we—“ “Did you want us to?” “Oh my god. OH MY GOD??” “Calm down im just messing with you, no we didn’t do anything. i just had to change your clothes because you puked all over them” this was so embarrassing you couldn’t bear to look him in the eyes.

“im so sorry, i really am. i didnt think i would let go that much yesterday.” “Don’t worry, i had fun. plus its nice seeing you not be so timid” your cheeks flush at his compliment. Fuck. i abandoned max yesterday, you thought, booking a cab to his house as you pack your stuff. “Youre not seriously booking a cab right now, are you?” “Not all of us come from Generational wealth, Carlos” you say, hoping you get connected to a driver as soon as possible. “No, no. you’re coming with me.” he says, taking his car keys and showing you the way to the garage. The moment you arrive at max’s house, you see an unfamiliar pair of heels by his shoes.

you knock on the door “Max?” No answer.“Max??” no answer yet again. you use your keys to open the door. “I didn’t expect you to come at this time” he says, his hand over a girl who you barely recognise’s shoulder. “Who’s this, max?” “It doesn’t matter, she was just about to leave” the woman looks confused but exits, mumbling something to max as she leaves. “Whos that, your conquest of the week?” you ask the second you hear the door click. “Why do you care? you must’ve had fun whoring out with the ferrari boys yesterday anyways.” He didnt mean for it to sound as harsh as it did, but what was done was done. Seriously? “Fuck you max. i’ve always been with you every second of every day and you don’t appreciate me for a moment. you constantly ditch me for these random fucking girls who you know are just with you because you’re in redbull. And i let myself go for one night. One fucking night and you’re on my back calling me a whore? you know what? i am tired. i am done with your bullshit. Maybe ferrari is better after all, huh?”

“You don’t understand my point” “what point max? what fucking point? Are you blind or do you just convince yourself to ignore the fact that ive been in love with you since we started talking? Do you know how much it hurt me to walk in your shadow all these years hoping you would notice that i was there for you? to notice that i was the one for you?” “You love me?” he sounds heartbroken saying it, but you’re on an adrenaline rush and don’t take note of it. you could feel your feelings for him fading more and more as you spoke your feelings out to max. “No. not anymore.” “Fuck. i never- i never thought, fuck.” “guess you just realised it too late mate” a voice speaks up behind you. “Lets go back, i cant stand to see his face.” you spit, with venom lacing your words as they sunk into max’s heart like a dagger.

After the incident with max, You realised that the night with the ferrari driver would be the start of something much, much bigger than you had expected. somewhere in between the races the 33 on your shirts slowly turned into 55. You didnt have to tell max you’ve moved on, it was clear as day. Carlos had gifted you a bracelet, a custom cartier one with the initials c.s adorned by a small pendant of a chili. everyone on the paddock could see that max was history to you. By this point it was also famously known that you had become Carlos’s girl. you didn’t mind the chatter though, you were so happy with carlos, he made you feel things that no one had been able to make you feel. he was gentle, and understanding. But at the same time, he knew exactly how to treat you, and the fact that you liked to be treated a little rough, once in a while, and he played it like a charm.

Your situationship with him was quick to blossom into a relationship, the best one you’ve ever been in. Days with Carlos were magical. he was crazy for you, as were you for him. you were so used to people stepping all over you that carlos treating you the way you deserved to be treated caught you off gaurd at times, but you grew attached to that quality of him. he made sure that he was the best man for you, and that you were treated exactly how you deserved to be. you noticed that you didnt even ask him for anything, he miraculously knew exactly what you wanted, and he delivered seamlessly. You had drifted significantly from max, but you didn’t mind anymore. Carlos was the only one for you and there were no doubts about it.

This particular morning was that of the emilia- romagnia grand prix, with you by the ferrari garage with carlos. everyone there had become used to you at this point, charles and some of the engineers becoming some of your best mates. Right now you were in carlos’s room, sitting on the bed as you watched him get ready. it was a home race for the ferrari boys. “What?” carlos talks over the phone, clearly upset with whatever he’s heard. you sit up straighter at his sudden change in demeanour. “Fuck. guess there’s nothing we can do huh?” he says, moments before he hangs up. “It’s canceled. the race is canceled because of a flood.” “What? Im so sorry to hear that Carlos, i know how much this race means to you.” you say, walking up to him and fixing up his shirt.

“Is there anything i can do to make you feel better?” memories of that night rush back into your head. you take in a sharp breath remember what carlos told you that day. “I’m sober now” “You remember that?” he looks into your eyes, his own shifting into a darker look. “I couldn’t for a moment forget it” you pull his collar in towards yourself “you little minx, me estás matando” “Lets see if you’re a man of your word, sainz” you dare to say. “you’re gonna wish you never challenged me, hermosa.”

His lips crash against yours as he pulls you up to jump onto him, legs wrapped around him as you take him in, in all his glory. your brain becomes foggy, and a thousand diffrent scenarios run around your head and at once, the all stop, Leaving your head a blank space. you run your hands through his hair, breathless. he walks you both over to the bed, his lips never leaving yours as unsaid words get conveyed to you. i want you. he gently places you on the bed, getting onto his knees.

You pull away from him for a moment, just a moment. you needed to get comfortable into the bed, and even the split second away from him makes you grow impatient. you look down to see him frantically trying to pull your shorts off you. Frustrated, you pull him by his neck back to you, kissing him with a rush you’ve never experienced before. you close your eyes, his wandering hands feeling making you feel sensitive all over. even a harmless rub against your thigh ticks you off. the whimper youve been suppressing comes out into the kiss, making Carlos feel as though he was losing his mind. he couldn’t take it anymore. he wanted you, he wanted you so badly he felt like a teenager about to cum in his pants.

All you wanted was to scream his name, loud enough for the entire hotel to hear, and he, wanted to listen to them on repeat like they were the best musical piece ever created. he was drunk on lust. “Can i?” you nod with all your might, you couldn’t handle it anymore. “Use your words, mi amor” “Yes, yes. please i want it so bad carlos, please.” “God, you sound so angelic begging for me right now.” Just as he was about to take off his top, the two of you hear a series of knocks on your door.

“Are you in here? its max” “Why is he here?” just as you were about to cuss him out, carlos signals you that hes got it covered. He picks you up, making you put your legs over his torso again. “Carlos? what are you-“ he shushes you, a finger falling over your swollen lips. just as you reach the room door, he clashes his lip’s against yours again. he slowly takes off the lock on the door, leaving max to think he can come in.

max is greeted by the two of you feverishly making out as he opens the door. you and carlos pay him no mind though, as if you couldn’t even see him. “Fuck you guys” He shouts as he bangs the door on his way out.

[betterthanburrow]

Quarterback’s Secret Girlfriend - Instagram AU

(Bengals Quarterback! Joe Burrow x Secret Girlfriend! OC)

liked by yourbrother and 50 more users

yourinstagram: it’s truly a hot girl summer.

view all 13 comments

joeyb_9: are those my sunglasses?

↳ yourinstagram: umm… no

↳ joeyb_9: i think those are my sunglasses… i had been looking for them all day.

↳ yourinstagram: i’m your girlfriend… so what’s yours is mine and you can’t argue with that.

↳ joeyb_9: i didn’t agree to those rules.

↳ yourinstagram: yes you did sign up for those rules when you asked me to be your girlfriend!

liked by yourinstagram and 69,513 more users

Bengals_Updates: Media Day Preview (IG STORY)

view all 5,009 comments

username1: THATS MY QUARTERBACK!

username2: oh lord… he’s so fine 🤤🫨

username3: the headband look is a dangerous look to our society

username4: i don’t know how i’ll act when the media say photos are posted… i might change as a person

username5: i’m not gay, but if i was… i would get on my knees for him.

username6: maybe the girls on tiktok are right… Joe Burrow is a fine white man!

username7: BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

username8: god, the men you have put on this earth to work are writing horny comments about Joe Burrow.

liked by yourinstagram and 580,300 more users

Bengals: If the internet breaks, this is why.

view all 30,420 comments

username1: my girlfriend is on instagram… delete this!

username2: MVP SEASON INCOMING 🔥

username3: hard to look at ❌ hard while looking at ✅

username4: 😍😍😍

username5: i swear i’m straight… i swear.

username6: the way that everyone dick rides Joe Burrow is crazy 😵‍💫

yourinstagram story updates

viewed by joeyb_9 and 69 more users

liked by 90,513 users

NFL_Gossip: this tweet is going viral on twitter 😂

view all 15,009 comments

username1: i just know she’s fighting for her life every time the Bengals sm admins posts about Joe.

↳ username2: i just pray that she doesn’t have tiktok…

username3: honestly like… look at the horny comments on the Bengals’ posts about Joe 🫠

yourbrother: lol @.yourinstagram

↳ yourinstagram: 😵‍💫💀

liked by 20,513 users

BurrowBengals: i got a notification that Joe Burrow posted on his instagram story but when i clicked on the notification, this screen appeared… did anyone see what Joe had posted on his story and then deleted?!

view all 15,001 comments

NFL_Gossip: CHECK OUT OUR INSTAGRAM PAGE! WE WILL BE POSTING THE DELETED INSTAGRAM STORY IN FIVE MINUTES ‼️

liked by 169,013 users

NFL_Gossip: We know that the Cincinnati Bengals Quarterback is very private about his life outside of football… So it’s no surprise that he very quickly deleted an instagram story that involved his rumored girlfriend (@.yourinstagram)

view all 55,420 comments

username1: JOE BURROW HAS A GIRLFRIEND… THIS IS THE WORSE DAY OF MY LIFE 😫💔

username2: wait… she’s so pretty, she’s so lucky!

username3: i thought Joe was a cat person?

username4: just went to check out her account but her account is private 🫠 i can’t imagine how many follow requests that she has gotten in the past few hours 😵‍💫

username5: i don’t care about Joe having a girlfriend… i do care about how i’m not on his close friends list 🤬

yourinstagram story updates

viewed by joeyb_9 and 99 more users

liked by yourinstagram and 375,850 more users

joeyb_9: Dark Knight

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lahjay10_: (TOP 2) DAM SURE AINT 2! 🐐

username1: a hot photo of you won’t make us forget that IG story that you accidentally posted 🤥

username2: THATS MY QB!

bengals.central: the Dark Knight of Cincinnati 🫡

username3: i’ve never wanted to be a football so bad!

username4: your girlfriend is a lucky woman…

yourinstagram: i don’t think i could write any more clever comment than all of the horny comments…

Author’s Note:

if you have a Instagram AU request, please send the IG AU request to my Inbox and i’ll try to get the requested Instagram AU published as fast as i can!

thank you all for the love and support! 🤍

[kxmikomrade]

We all know that we have both fallen in love with Kaveh🫶

So<3

GN!reader

A medium serving of Cafe latte, Onigiri, and cinnamon dango<33

Imagine in SAGAU, Creator!reader dotes on Kaveh, and is practically their fav<33 imagine how jealous other characters are bc their dearest creator is favoring him more than the rest<3

I will love this man more than my entire life.

🍁˖࿐ SAGAU - Kaveh

╰┈➤Kaveh x Reader Order: Cafe latte, Medium serving onigiri, cinnamon dango Genre: Fluff, crack Gn!reader (or any gender) Pronouns: Y/P (your pronouns) Type: Headcanons Requested! by: @astrilien Warnings: Some swearing i think other than that, nothing but this was written before Kaveh's release/drip marketing. And I haven't done Haithams quest yet so 🤷 Waiter's Notes: How have your travels been? I hope that it hasnt been much trouble. I'm glad you have stopped by, please enjoy! ^^ Author's Notes: Welcome back my dear costumer who gives me food aswell 😌

i pray for ur main, bcs theyre gonna get replaced as soon as this man gets released

doesnt matter if he isnt suitable for being a dps, if u build him right, and give him the fanciest 5* weapon, mans all set

Your main has gone through alot with you, but never something like this, they just KNOW that they arent gonna last long

Characters who got benched be like: first time?

First time you heard of his name you didnt really think much to it until he got leaked and showed up in the archon quest that you were all 👀👀

Ofc, the man took pride in it and got a huge ego boost because you just dropped all your attention on Alhaitham and the story and focused on him

Speaking of Haitham, he's never gonna hear the end of it. Bcs Kaveh's already gonna use u in his old married couple bickering with him

Kaveh literally making sure to be extra expressive and salty to Haitham whenever he's going to be shown in a quest just for you 🥰🥰

And every character you've ever simped for just stands there like 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

Kind of heart broken with how you easily just dropped everything for him and a TAD bit jealous but they won't say anything because it isn't good :((

Bennett, Sucrose, Ayaka, Amber, Collei, Barbara, Noelle, Ganyu, Gorou, Nilou, Kaeya, Yun Jin, Yao Yao, Kazuha, Thoma, Nahida

*Is confused* First, you decide to go to Sumru to continue the archon quest, then get in the brain-juice draining quest with too many complications looking for answers and now you're suddenly simping over this random blonde guy???

Razor, Xiangling, Chongyun, Qiqi, Sayu, Layla, Xiao, Yun Jin

Uses their work to their advantage to get your spotlight back on them

Hu Tao, Yanfei, Yelan

Tries to get your attention back. Doing big dmg, getting you trinkets and even getting into trouble just so you could pay attention to them again

Itto, Klee, Yoimiya, Beidou, Childe, Hu Tao, Venti, Xinyan

Doesn't really care. (They're just bitter inside bcs of how you chose him over them LMAO)

Xiao, AlHaitham, Cyno, Eula, Kaeya, Mona, Diona, Keqing, Wanderer

Really doesn't care. Like good for you ig *proceeds to go to work*

Jean, Kokomi, Rosaria, Albedo, Diluc, Lisa, Ningguang, Zhongli, Shenhe, Raiden, Sara, Faruzan, Shinobu, Dori, Candace, Tighnari

Does NOT like it and they WILL let you know, doing small dmg out of spite. Even trying to shake off your control. And ofc, constantly complaining or mumbling about it

Itto, Heizou, Fischl

"Oh, I see how it is" then makes a full devised plan about getting you back, it's a really good plan so let's see how it goes 🫡

Ayato, Heizou, Yae Miko, Yelan, Xingqiu

(458 words)

Sorry dat it's short, I haven't read much SAGAU so I don't rlly know wat to write :'DD

[therhythmafterthesummer]

heLLO? EXCUSE ME, you got covid??? 😭😭😭 i hope that you’re better now!!! Pls remember to drink lots of water and eat your meals 🥹 and i hope you get some rest as much as you can!

Also! I hope you don’t pressure yourself to write too much. I’m still glad that you’re trying to push out some drabbles, but I hope you do it because you liked it very much to share with us!! We’ll be here whenever you’re ready 💜

just to add to my lore, i used to write stories too 😅 hehe. So I do understand the frustrations. I hope you keep writing despite it all!!

Biiiig hugs to you bibi 💜💜💜

in other news, i’m crawling thru uni at this point 😃 pray for me HABSJABSHSBS moral support is appreciated.

~🍓 (i almost forgot to sign this JAHSJAHSHS)

i diddddd. it was awful sdfkjhnskf but manageable ig. i'm muuuuch better now, bby. thank you 💜💜💜 i have def been drinking lots of water and taking vitamins and stuff... i'm sure that's helped too.

i'm really trying not to pressure myself to write (emphasis on trying...), which is why i haven't posted much. overall i haven't written much and what i've written not everything is something i want to share/is ready to be shared. so i'm working around that~

i'm always super glad for you guys' continuous encouragement. makes me feel really warm and fuzzy inside, and i just appreciate it so so much💜💜

big hugs to you too!! i'm sure you'll make it out of uni just fine 🫡 i believe in you bb!

[sketchbook-stars]

GLASS EYE JURY QUOTEBOOK

"Oh no what are they up to this time" find out!

"Mind when I airdrop 23 kb of club penguin feet to his brain" -Envi

"I can make my tail change patterns, watch! [CRACK] ..Oh no!" -Tally

"'Nightmare Blunt Rotation' motherfucker you mean your therapists?" -Oreo to Seara

"I can have one abuser in my life as a treat" "ABSOLUTELY NOT." -Cometose, Doppel

"IM REPLACING YOUR MILK ICE CUBES WITH HOTDOG WATER." -Jude

"i need to hire this dude to hype me up to take my antidepressants whenever i get new ones" -Jude

"[loudly] WEEZER??? [weezer riff played full volume] AUUUGGHH" -Seara?

"OF COURSE YOU HAVE HEADMATES. IT CAME FOR FREE WITH YOUR FUCKING TRAUMA. /ref" -Jude

"your kid committed mitosis 🔥" -Cometose

"why's the bug speaking like that" "THERAPY BUG" "OH NAUR" -Spiral, Noximay, Spiral

"Fuck people named Eros ig" "On it 🫡/j" -Cometose, Noximay

From the same incident:

"YOU FLATTENED THE ORCA??" -Amias

"Are you fucking telling me you did a jolly conga line in here and crushed me like a pancake" -Tally

"'I won't tell a soul okay' walks up to soul" -Tally

"An anthropomorphic bug is giving me therapy. It's working, but why?" -Cometose

"FUCK YOU MY DAD IS BUGBO AND ALSO GOD" -Cometose

"Don't worry my abandonment issues are surface level" -Amias

"I am one roar song away from killing you" -Lucid

"Time to pray to Mr. Jash" "WHAT." -Jude, Tally

"Put your hand near me I am innocent and harmless" "ok" "HFHRHEHSGSHRHSHAG" -Seara, (out of sys person), Seara

"UHHH well you see- DISTRACTION! [Leaves Call]" -Eiwen

'EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY- AUTISM VERSUS AUTISM' -Eiwen

"Breaking Bad and Chonny Jash crossover" -Juno

"SHUT UP LET ME MAKE A PRETTY FLOWER FOR MY WIFE" -Juno

"Does a pirate know what pronouns are?" -Jude

"'Whats wrong with you' well erm.. (link to the dms with our abuser) catch up on the lore" -Cometose

"I just pspspsps'd a whole grown man." -Seara

"..comfort bong rip." -Jayshroom

"They took biograft in the divorce...[sobbing]" -Subspace

"silly little guy to traumatized pipeline except the pipeline is structured like a rollercoaster" -Civ

Part 1 of idk. Too tired to add more

[grackleshells]

Okay, fellas,,,, good news and bad news.

Good news is I learned how to do the worm!! 🐛🪱🐛🪱

Bad news is I was landing wrong and using incorrect form so I ended up bruising my bladder and am now in pain!!!

Moral of the story ig is to ‼️ALWAYS‼️ worm with caution!😔 Please pray for a speedy recovery for me so that I may worm again🫡

[chloeworships]

God saw how they treated you and what they did and said.

Because of what they did, God is going to bless you EXCEPTIONALLY! B

Your wealth will increase and very quickly soon ⬆️

This is a reallyyyyy deeeppp message.

Also the fact the dog entered and that’s when I saw the writing ✍🏾 I can infer the dog was slipping inside my location.

Man God has been so cryptic lately

🥵

PS. It’s interesting, I saw Drake in a dream on IG where his money kept growing and growing FAST. It was spinning around and around!!

Expect ya money to BLOW and quadruple because some folks couldn’t keep 🤐 and tried to SHIEST you.

But don’t forget the warning ‼️

🐶

This could concern Egypt as well in terms of the blessing and working with Israel 🇮🇱 and the US 🇺🇸

Pray about this.

I saw the initials

K.M.

In black and white.

Recall MJ had a song called “Black and White”

Because of YOU and the ANOINTING God put on you, individuals will be blessed. This includes NATIONS.

🎶No I’m not lucky I’m blessed YES🎶

…There’s a difference between the two 2️⃣

Whenever I hear Momemt 4 Life, I cry 😢. That song got me through some rough times. This is my ghetto Cinderella song… a “hood” fairytale in some respects.

Music heals. Thanks to the greats who make our songs that saved us from DEATH.

To get this message today is also a blessing babes.

God loves you and he sees you even if the world is against you because they think you don’t belong.

Remember Jesus sat with sinners, taxpayers, the sick, and prostitues and he showed them they could leave all that behind if they chose HIM. He would provide.

Stop doing those who were sent to bless you, who God sent to make you WEALTHIER, who God sent to love you…….dirty.

PPS. No matter how much they try to “steal” and “copy” you, they can never do it like you. You’re an original and they don’t realize THAT’S what makes you successful, you’re not trying to be like everyone else.

I’m proud of you babes! All your work and love and time and money was not given in vain.

They thought they could outsmart you but watch God work.

I also saw God’s sword 🗡️ on that same kind of paper 📄 in pencil ✏️ in a separate vision before the dog dream.

So…. 🩸

👀

That being on the 500-billionaire’s-list-making-over $5 billion is looking pretty good rn from where I sit hahaha 😝

PPS. Every time these people mention ya name, God is going to make a deposit 💵 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 fr though. I’m not even kidding 👀

On a blessed day like today, this message is a gift and a promise from God. Remember it. Remember what he said he would do for you. Just like he gave us his son ⤵️

Praise God!!!!

Awww babes as I was wrapping up this message why did I see a brown goat 🐐 and be picked up his leg as if to salute 🫡 me. That’s adorable 🥰 Me and my animals 😂😂

This is why I love BLACK CATS and advocate for adopting them and other black animals. They have been unfairly persecuted for simply being black and because of lies and superstitions. God has always promoted the BLACK SHEEPS of the world. The ones ppl didn’t think deserved their blessings.

I heard God say

“Play Radio” 📻

This is one of my fav songs by Beyoncé. This must be for someone.

Also someone is moving. You’re the black sheep of your family.

This is how I feel about music. 🎶 This brings back memories of me as a kid and a teen.

[rrxnjun]

i hope u can figure out one for it;-; but like that is mind blowing cuz he is just so aesthetically pleasing but now that im trying to come up with a url with his name nothing comes to mind so actually hoping u will figure out something;-; i'm praying it will go away soon!!!

i love thrill ride im very happy u liked it!! and i hope that u will find some that u will like out of the recommendations cuz they have very good songs out there:o YESSS it's just too goddamn hard too recommend songs;-; (i actually struggle so much with it it suckswhbejdnf ;-;)

i didn't know any of them!! but i really liked movie star cinema and without you!!! and the other ones were great as well but those were the songs that stood out for me:o but WITHOUT YOU!!?!?! i'm glad u told me about this song cuz i would be heartbroken if i wouldn't have known about this amazing song

thank u🥲 it won't prepare us in hungary as well all of the people who i talked with and go to uni said that it is going to be very different and much harder in some ways;-; goddamn then i will try to get myself ready for that but i'm probably half way there cuz i'm already praying to just pass my maths exam🥲🥲

so very sorry about being gone again!! i had my exams this week so i barely looked at my phone cuz of preparing and since i fucked up my most important one i have just been staring at my walls and contemplating life🤭 so yeah sorry to be gone🫡 and hope u are good and well!!!!!🥳💕💞 (liebestraum anon)

update: i didnt come up with anything better than what i already had so if the spirit of god himself doesnt magically give me a better idea im just gonna be stuck w a shitty url bc i refuse to not have a jihoon url ig AHAHA

i am afraid to say that i havent listened to much more yet bc ive been studying a lot and havent had the time 😭😭😭 i once again promise to listen to more after exams are over!! i'll give you a full review and everything dw >:(( i'm sure i'll find some i like!!

YOU LIKED MY MOST FAV SONGS !!!!!!!! without you is such a beautiful song its so refreshing i think. like they dont have the usual boygroup noise music concept we see (and love, come on i stan nct) and its so nice to listen to. their vocals also!!! more in love w cix each day. please watch this perf of without you if you have time and energy to its what made me stan actually

uni is always harder but when youre a high schooler its hard to admit that to yourself ;-; (speaking from personal experience LMAO) but i truly hope u get adjusted fine and quick!! i didnt have to study as hard in hs so i think the workload was the most shocking thing for me that i had to get used to, so if you are used to studying a lot and having a lot of assignments maybe it wont be that different after all! praying for your maths exam im sure you'll rock it!!!

its okay!! im taking ages to reply too and im barely on this blog bc of exams >:(( hope your exam didnt go as badly as you think it did, sometimes we are just too pessimistic. how did your other exams go?? im manifesting good grades for you mwah!!! hope you are taking care of yourself and relaxing after all the studies. im looking forward to hearing from u when things get easier on your end (and mine too, 3 most difficult exams left so im honestly manifesting i pass LMAO)

[theloveinc]

yh it’s over and as far as i know she hasn’t come back lol that was the thing is she would do slick weird shit and when ppl confronted her about it she would deactivate and come back under a new pseud with a new blog and pretend like she was a different person but still continued her strange antics and that’s what that whole call out was about i think butter/muffy figured her out. such an odd individual. no idea where she is but i hope she’s got her shit together 💀🙏🏾

LMFAO soooo true, like get well soon, luv. Praying for u (kinda ig)🫡🫡

Honestly tho, march aside, it’s crazy how many people will just dip when they’re called out for shit and then come back like three weeks later… probably because they miss the attention and whatnot. we’ve seen it happen so many times before and we’ll see it happen again… so ig I shouldn’t be too surprised that the whole thing went down that way (maybe… just at the fact she got me good LOL. I really had no clue).

But… c’est la vie. We just gotta be thankful she’s smart enough not to show her face around here after literally fucking scamming people, omg🤢

Thanks for all the insider info tho, anon! I loved chatting w/ u about it and I’m glad I was able to correct some of my information on butter as well!!!❤️