#proudly a sexy nerd

[vampirewalterskinner]

Fox Mulder is not smooth!!!!! He cannot get ladies with ease!!! He’s not a skilled fighter!!! He’s a nerd!!! He talks about weird, outlandish things!!! He was tired of always losing his gun in a fight so he now carries two!!! He trips at crime scenes!!! He calls sexy hotlines bc he’s lonely!!! He proudly talks about his porn collection!!! His closest friends are three conspiracy theory nerds (affectionate)!!! He throws pencils at the ceiling!!! He blurts obscure knowledge to throw people off!!! He hates authority figures!!! He cries a lot!!! He loves being held!!! He loves his sister!!!

Someone else tag in and keep this going, I’m tired of yelling about how much I love this dork.

[bakudekublogblog]

happy bakudeku day!!

bkdk post-canon fluff !! manga spoilers

[READ ON AO3]

It happens while on break out on patrol. Izuku watches the sunset from their usual spot on the rooftop, the wind teasing at his curls and a stern, serious set to his mouth. Uh oh. Well, it’s a good thing Katsuki has dinner and a surprise.

“Oi,” Katsuki gruffs. He tosses the bag of chips at him. “Think fast.” 

Izuku pivots, lightning quick, and snatches the bag out of the air just before it can smack him in the face. Nice reflexes. Fuck, Katsuki really is down bad if even something as small as that gets him going. His boyfriend is just so fucking sexy it drives him nuts. Izuku inspects the chip bag and ah, there’s the smile Katsuki loves so much. 

“Wow,” Izuku says. He turns it over and reads the back. “Been a minute since I’ve seen one of these.” 

“Didn’t know they still made ‘em till I spotted ‘em,” Katsuki admits. 

A brilliant stroke of luck, really. It’s the same brand they used to get all the time together as children. Katsuki had spotted them in the check out line as he was grabbing them onigiri to tide them over until they got home. Izuku tears the bag open and wrinkles his nose. 

“Oh god,” he says, laughing a little. He procures one neon-orange chip out and examines it critically. “Were they always this color?” 

“Fuck if I know,” Katsuki says, following suit and wow, okay that is pungent. He blinks several times as cheese dust assaults his face and Izuku giggles. Oh well, they never really bought these for the actual chips anyway. Katsuki shuffles through them to get the little silver packet with their prize. Izuku pops the chip into his mouth before retrieving his own and sending Katsuki a significant glance. 

“Together?” he asks. 

Katsuki’s heart softens. Fuck, he’ll never get tired of hearing that word, not after he spent so long ensuring it. Izuku grins. 

“On three,” he says. “One, two—” 

He tears his packet open before he actually says three, even though he’s the fucking one who wanted it to be on three in the first place. Katsuki hurriedly follows after with a huff of irritation. Katsuki cracks into a grin at the first hint of green.

No way. No fucking way. How—? It must be a brand new batch. Izuku had only been officially added to the roster about a year ago. The Deku on the holographic card beams up at him cheerily and fuck, Katsuki’s heart is a tender, aching thing in his chest as he admires it. Izuku, in a bag of Heroes chips, exactly where he should be. He looks up at Izuku, smiling, smiling, smiling. 

“I got a huge nerd,” he announces proudly, turning the card to show him. 

Izuku blinks up at him, glances at Katsuki’s card, and then his face crumples. He turns away, hiding his face in the palm of his hand. Katsuki takes a step toward him, already shushing and ready to soothe him-- Izuku waves a hand. 

“No, no, I’m—” Izuku cuts himself off, laughing. He holds the card he’d received to his face. “Oh my god.” 

“What?” Katsuki asks, stopping short and frowning. “You know I love huge nerds.” 

“That’s not—” Izuku shakes his head. Is… is he tearing up? He dabs at his eyes with his big, chunky gloves. He looks at his feet and his lashes cast long shadows down the curves of his freckled cheeks. “It’s just funny.” 

Katsuki frowns, feeling a little pinch of concern. “What?” 

Izuku gives him a shy little smile. He turns his card toward him, and Katsuki’s own face smirks back at him. 

“I got the love of my life,” Izuku says, sniffing. 

Oh. It punches Katsuki right in the gut. Wait, really? There’s no way. Katsuki double checks his own card just to be safe, but no, it’s real. Izuku’s laugh is somewhat choked. 

“Did you plan this?” Izuku asks, weakly. 

“No, no I—” God, Katsuki wishes he did. That would have been the romantic gesture of the century. (Well, besides funding Izuku’s suit maybe. Katsuki will admit it’s been very hard thinking of a way to top that .) It would’ve been the perfect set up to propose, dammit. Katsuki supposes he still could, but of course he didn’t bring the ring with him out on fucking patrol. He snatches the card out of Izuku’s hand and holds them side-by-side. Deku and Dynamight, both halves of the Wonder Duo. 

“Then it’s destiny,” Izuku concludes, misty-eyed and smiling. 

“Guess so,” Katsuki gruffs. He laughs too then, a soft snort of disbelief. “What are the odds—” 

“Of this happening twice?” Izuku finishes for him, all fond amusement. He shakes his head. “I dunno.” 

“That’s fucking crazy,” Katsuki says, handing Izuku’s card back over to him. 

“Mmm,” Izuku says and there’s a faraway look in his eyes. He touches the face of card-Katsuki with one tender finger and hey, what the fuck? Why is he touching the card tenderly when he’s got the real thing right here? Katsuki looms into his space, pressing a hand to the small of Izuku’s back, drawing him close, and pressing kisses to his temples and his cheeks. Not because he’s jealous of a piece of shit plastic-card, that would be fucking stupid. Still, it’s a relief when Izuku turns to meet Katsuki’s kisses with his mouth. 

“I love you,” Izuku murmurs. He wraps his arms around Katsuki’s neck and kisses him deeper. “I really, really love you.” 

He tastes like artificial cheese and damn it’s a good fucking thing they already collected all the cards worth having, because there’s no way Katsuki could have justified buying anymore chips when they taste this bad. Katsuki pulls back and wrinkles his nose. 

“Yeah, they tasted better as kids,” Izuku agrees. He boops Katsuki’s nose gently and Katsuki nips at his finger, just missing with a click of his teeth. “Kacchan?” 

Somehow. With that word alone, Katsuki immediately knows. A gong of dread thrums through him, his eyes widen. No. No fucking way. Izuku pets his arms up and down. 

“Kacchan, my love,” Izuku begins. “I’ve been thinking.” 

Katsuki has to stop this, he has to stop this immediately. But the shock of it steals the breath from Katsuki’s lungs and stops his heart in his chest. Izuku is smiling at him so sweetly it feels criminal to break it. Katsuki can only gape and let his gaze flicker over Izuku’s face over and over again. Izuku takes his hands in his own, bringing them to his lips. 

“I know it’s kind of sudden,” Izuku whispers, already tearing up. “But I’ve been thinking about it for a while. And this— it just feels like it’s a sign you know? Even— even the universe thinks we belong together.” 

Oh god, it’s fucking happening. Katsuki’s knees are jelly, his breathing harsh and short. 

“And I—” Izuku continues, so sweet and almost shy. “I really do want you more than anything, Kacchan. You’re the best thing in my life, the greatest partner I could ever ask for, you’re— you really are the love of my life, Kacchan. You always were. I’ve been chasing you my whole life and— and having you, you being mine is— it’s more than I ever imagined I could have. And then you gave me my dreams back.” 

Fuck. Goddamn him. He’s really doing this. Right here, during patrol, on some random rooftop. It’s so not fucking romantic. It’s also the most romantic thing that’s ever happened to Katsuki. Fuck! 

“You’re everything to me,” Izuku says, soft and dreamy and fucking perfect. His eyes are so big and green and full of love that Katsuki feels like he’s fucking drowning in them. “You’re everything I want. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. Kacchan…. Kacchan, will you marry me?” 

God. Even knowing it was coming hadn’t prepared Katsuki in the slightest. Izuku’s sweet voice, his sweeter words, his kind eyes so full of love. How the fuck did someone like Katsuki end up with an actual angel? This soft, loving, perfect creature who has just gifted himself to Katsuki. It’s like Katsuki’s heart is breaking sweetly and all his love inside is bursting out of him. 

“Fuck,” Katsuki wheezes. He’s definitely crying. This is so fucking embarrassing. Of course Izuku has to do this. He just has to beat him at everything, doesn’t he? He can’t even let him fucking propose, he’s just gotta beat him to the punch. Fucking asshole. He’s such a dickbag for this. 

“I know, baby,” Izuku says, rubbing his shoulders soothingly. 

“I have a ring!” Katsuki shouts, groaning and tucking his head into the crook of his elbow. “Goddamn, impatient little—” 

Izuku’s giggling is downright giddy. 

“Kacchan!” he cries. “You do?” 

“Of course I—” Katsuki seizes Izuku by the shoulders, then shakes him a little. “Of course I have a ring, you goddamn menace. I was gonna— I dunno, take you to dinner or something! Do something nice!” 

Well, hopefully he would have thought of something better than just dinner, but now Katsuki supposes he doesn’t have to. Izuku is grinning too brightly; his eyes are full of a thousand stars. He takes Katsuki’s face in his hands. 

“Put it on me then,” Izuku demands. “Put it on me and make me yours.” 

Katsuki sweeps him up into his arms and kisses him harshly, desperately. The metal of Izuku’s suit digs into Katsuki’s ribs as he crushes their bodies together, their faces are slick with tears, and Izuku still tastes like those god-awful Heroes Chips, but it’s perfect. Together , Katsuki thinks with a greedily little relish. They’re going to be together for the rest of their lives.

[ofthecaravel]

You Know How To Haunt

A 'You Don't Go To Parties' Halloween Special/ Mini Fic/ Oneshot

Summary: Before the night they confessed, Danny and Sam had a very similar evening that ended very, very differently.

Tags: Pre-confession YDGTP Sanny, ANGST, feelingssss (that aren't one sided but Danny thinks they are), saucy thoughts but nothing explicit, basically just infuriating tension

Words: 2.7k

A/N: Sooooo I missed the YDGTP boys and wanted to give a little bit more of a prequel to give y'all a feel of just how tense shit was between them. Inspired by Jennifer's Body, 'Halloween' by Noah Kahan, 'Cheerleader' by Ashnikko, and @holdingup-fallingsky's glasses Danny edit <3

~~~

It was a dark and stormy night, and Danny could not for the life of him find Sam.

It was the typical shtick with a Halloween twist; Sam proposed going to a Halloween party (of course) with costumes, tacky decorations, and “babes as far as the eye can see”. Danny complained and fought it as hard as he usually did, but Sam won for the thousandth time and Danny found himself rummaging in his closet for any semblance of a costume. After tossing on some cheap glasses frames, a velcro bow tie, and a very slim fitting button down that Danny had zero recollection of ever owning, Danny announced his costume.

“A nerd?” Sam mocked, his voice and subsequent laugh muffled from behind the bathroom door where he had holed up to put the finishing touches on his own costume. “Not straying far from reality, are we?”

“Fuck off,” Danny laughed, adjusting the cheap material of the bowtie that was already beginning to strangle him a little bit. “Come on, do I ever get to see your costume or do you just live in my bathroom now?”

“I’d live in here if it wasn’t so filthy,” Sam accused. “I mean, seriously, man, do you ever take out the trash?”

“You’re deflecting,” Danny shot back in a sing-song, banging on the door. “Open up! Michigan PD, you’re under arrest for loitering!”

“You’ll never take me alive!” Sam screeched. “Geez Louise, one second…”

After what felt like an eternity, the bathroom door swung open with a practiced grandeur and Sam strode out with his arms held high, carrying two tinsel pom poms and donning a ripped up cheerleader outfit. He had put on blush in a way that could only be described as amateur and his long, chestnut waves were pulled up in a high ponytail and fastened with a blue scrunchie. Danny played off his suddenly very dry mouth with a look of shock as Sam did a ceremonious twirl and shook a pom pom right under Danny’s nose. Danny snorted and batted it away.

“A cheerleader?” Danny asked, clearly not sold on the concept. “I guess, just, sort of…why?”

“I’ll be the talk of the town, that’s why,” Sam hummed proudly, smoothing the cheap fabricky pleats of his dizzyingly short cheer skirt. “Also, I mean, I look amazing. So that’s a big plus.”

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that,” Danny murmured, pretending to look away incredulously but doing it purely because he was finding it difficult to look at Sam’s costume at all. He felt the hot flush it provoked in his face and the last thing he needed was for Sam to notice.

“Hey, that’s my shirt!” Sam scoffed, yanking on the collar of Danny’s shirt. “What gives?”

“It was in my closet.” Danny pointed out.

“Yeah, well, it’s not yours,” Sam stammered, putting his hands on his hips and making the pom poms shimmy loudly. 

“What do you care?”

“It looks ridiculous.”

“I’m not sure I’m the ridiculous one here, Miss Team Captain.”

“It’s practically popping off of you, Dan.”

“Here, is this better?”

Danny undid the first top buttons and gestured at his chest.

“Now I’m a sexy nerd,” Danny purred, rolling his eyes and turning away from Sam. He heard Sam make a funny little noise he couldn’t quite identify before letting out an exasperated sigh that he knew all too well. 

“Whatever,” Sam muttered. 

“Get in the car, Stacy, the cheer squad needs you,” Danny joked, grabbing his keys off the wall and tossing a convincing smile back at Sam, already dreading the night that lay before them.

~~

To Danny’s disgust, Sam had been thoroughly right about his costume being a hit. People couldn’t keep their hands off of him; smoothing their palms over the felt number 1 on his chest and lacing their fingers with his to shake the pom poms and asking him over and over again to twirl. Sam, as he always did, gathered his crowd right within eyeshot of Danny, who sat in annoyance on the couch with a full Solo cup. Granted, Danny had corralled a few friends of his own to talk to, but he couldn’t help but sneak glances over at Sam every other minute. With each sip of his drink, Danny warmed up to the truth about why he was so pissed off at all the attention Sam was getting: Sam wanted the attention, but Danny wanted to be the only one to give it. And more glaringly, Danny wanted to be the only opinion that Sam actually cared about. There were all the usual underlying feelings behind it that Danny kept at bay like he always did, but Danny wasn’t all that interested in tuning in to the mushy gushy. As the alcohol softened up his gaze and warmed his limbs, he found his eyes dragging over Sam’s long legs and the curve of his neck, allowing himself to add on to a fantasy in momentary increments. However, after his attention had been drawn into conversation, Danny looked back to find that Sam had disappeared. Without thinking, Danny got to his feet and excused himself, stumbling through the crowd to track Sam down.

--

Danny couldn’t find him. He traversed the entire lower level of the house, ducking under cobwebs and paper bats and even circling the bonfire in the backyard in hopes of catching a glimpse of Sam and his stupid, slutty costume. After making his way back inside, Danny looked at the crepe paper that had been taped from banister to banister on the stairs and knew that if Sam was anywhere, it was where he wasn’t supposed to be. Danny stepped over the makeshift caution tape and jogged up the steps, becoming increasingly convinced that he was going to walk in on Sam and some random in the throes of passion. His stomach flipped and he swallowed thickly, waving off the imagery and reminding himself that he just wanted to know that Sam was safe. That’s all. 

Danny felt pretty bad about snooping around someone’s house that he didn’t know, but he knew Sam wouldn’t, and that’s why he was so certain he would find him up there. Sure enough, Danny hesitantly opened a random door and saw Sam sitting cross legged on a bed, flipping through a thick scrapbook by the warm light of the bedside lamp. His ponytail had been abandoned and the scrunchie was now around his slim wrist, the sequins catching the light as he continued to look through the scrapbook. His upper body was swaying slightly in a seasick, wobbling way that let Danny know Sam was properly drunk, which was further confirmed when he looked up at Danny and let out a surprised gasp.

“Oh my god, hi!” Sam greeted cheerfully, dropping the scrapbook and holding his arms out to Danny. “Come here.”

“You want a hug?” Danny giggled, his annoyance already melting away. Sam tended to do that to him, despite the annoyance always coming back tenfold after some time.

“No, help me up,” Sam whined. He hooked his arms around Danny’s neck as Danny pulled him to his feet, making no motion to move away as he sank into Danny’s embrace and let out a comical sigh, nestling his face into the crook of Danny’s neck. Danny let out a low chuckle and held him lightly, his heart threatening to beat through his chest as Sam swayed in his arms. 

“Don’t fall asleep on me, Sammy,” Danny joked, his voice cracking slightly and making him cringe at his own sudden ineptitude around his friend of over 10 years. He could hardly believe how pathetic he was sometimes.

“But you’re so cozy,” Sam argued, his voice muffled and sweet against Danny’s skin. 

“Do you wanna go home?” Danny asked gently, the noise of the party oddly melting away as he tentatively smoothed a hand over Sam’s hair.

“No!” Sam suddenly cried, straightening and pushing off of Danny, only to fall back onto the bed again with a bounce. He began to giggle raucously, holding his hands over his face as hiccups began to edge their way between laughs. Danny rolled his eyes and moved to pick Sam up again, but Sam swatted at his chest and wiggled out of his grasp.

“No, no, let me rest, you goon,” Sam slurred defiantly, even drawing a knee up to kick at Danny’s chest. “Ssh, I’m sleeping. I’m honking my mimi’s.”

“You can sleep at home, Sam,” Danny argued patiently, trying again to scoop Sam up and onto his feet. “Come on, up and at em, soldier.”

“I’m not your soldier,” Sam shot back, lifting his chin proudly. “I’m a cheerleader.”

“The very best,” Danny assured him with a grin, his breath beginning to shake with nerves as Sam’s hands reached for him, red hot and wandering as he grabbed at Danny’s shoulders and biceps. 

“You’re so strong,” Sam murmured, finally allowing Danny to pull him up again, swaying on the spot as his blurry eyes blinked up at Danny. His eyes were amber and nearly animalistic in the lamplight and Danny had to look away, kneeling down to pick up the abandoned scrapbook and tucking it where he hoped it belonged.

“What are you even doing up here?” Danny asked. 

“Bored,” Sam shrugged, beginning to wander around the outskirts of the room. “There weren’t even any good costumes here tonight which is so lame. And, I mean, there’s a whole floor we’re not even using? Of course I’m going to scope it out.”

“Yeah, you’re always where you shouldn’t be,” Danny teased, a touch of bitterness lacing his words. When he looked up at Sam again he knew his tone had gone right over his head, seeing as Sam was leaned up against the wall with his eyes trained on the ceiling fan, his head bobbing slightly as he followed each rotation. Danny allowed to indulge in another moment of observation, taking note of Sam’s exposed stomach and his arms tucked coyly behind his back. He was jolted out of it by Sam meeting his eye and grinning wickedly.

“Hi,” Sam sang softly, cocking his head at Danny.

“You ready to go now?” Danny asked, now desperate to get Sam as far away from him as soon as possible. He got to his feet and approached Sam, getting ready to argue before Sam surprised him by lacing his arms around Danny’s neck again and pulling him in close.

“Do you remember,” Sam started, whispering conspiratorially. “When we were younger, and we used to play boyfriend girlfriend?”

Danny felt an electric shock go through his body at the memory. It had been a truly innocent game, simply practicing the day to day motions they thought they might have to go through when they were old enough and had girlfriends. Who better to play with than your best friend? Plus, Danny had secretly always really liked calling Sam his “girlfriend”, and doing all the fake grand gestures to ensure his happiness had come very naturally. Sam had always said he was the best at being the boyfriend, and Danny had always believed it. 

“Yeah, sure,” Danny replied in confusion, his cheeks prickling with uncomfortable warmth again. 

“You’re always playing it when we go to parties and you don’t even realize,” Sam laughed. Danny’s eyes widened subconsciously and he stammered, knitting his brow in further confusion.

“What?” Danny managed, attempting a light hearted laugh. 

“You do!” Sam crowed in amusement, stabbing an accusatory finger into the center of Danny’s chest. “You love to boyfriend me. Years of practice. You miss it, huh?”

“Wow, you’re hammered,” Danny said dismissively, shaking his head. 

“‘S’not the point,” Sam sighed, his head dropping onto Danny’s chest, his soft hair brushing against Danny’s exposed skin and sending a shockwave through Danny’s reflexes. 

“I’m taking you home, Sam, end of story,” Danny whispered in Sam’s ear, attempting to straighten his neck before Sam’s hand reached up and pulled Danny’s head back down. Sam’s lips went to Danny’s ear in a whisper of his own.

“I hate you wearing my fucking shirt,” Sam whispered, his voice shockingly sober and coherent in the blink of an eye. A cold sweat broke out over Danny’s body and he felt his breaths coming out in jagged, stilted intervals as Sam kept him anchored to him. 

“You wanna take it off me, then?” Danny ventured, his voice matching Sam’s barely audible pitch. He tried to make it a joke but his voice fell flat and serious. He could have sworn he heard Sam’s voice hitch before Sam let go of him, allowing Danny to step back and boggle at Sam’s bizarre behavior. Sam had such an odd glint in his eye, assessing Danny with his lip tucked between his teeth as he continued to struggle to stay standing. For a moment, Danny considered what he would do if he was less restrained than he had learned to be around Sam. There was a massive part of him that was aching and begging for him to pin Sam against the wall and tear away at that infuriating little skirt, holding him down by the warmth of his waist and shutting him up with his teeth and tongue. But he knew he couldn’t, so he stood with a scowl on his face and challenged Sam again.

“What?” Danny snapped, his frustration growing as Sam continued to refuse to leave. That’s all Danny wanted right now, but Sam never, ever gave him what he wanted. 

“I…” Sam trailed off and didn’t pick it back up, simply staring a hole through Danny’s head. Danny could practically hear the gears turning in Sam’s brilliant brain, but all that followed was silence. It was the loudest silence Danny had ever heard, and he wondered with a jolt if there was something Sam wanted to say that was akin to what Danny had been screaming into pillows and scrawling in journals for years now. Without a word, Danny pleaded with Sam to just say it so he could stop slowly crushing himself under the weight of whatever it was between them that neither of them wanted to touch. But he knew he wouldn’t, and Sam didn’t, and Danny let out a sigh that threatened to bring tears with it. He walked to the door and opened it, motioning with a nod of his head.

“We’re going,” Danny said firmly, taking off the stupid glasses frames and ripping off the bowtie with an extension of his pinkie, crumpling them into a ball in his hand and tucking them into his pocket.

“But-”

“I don’t want to play anymore, Sam,” Danny snapped, unable to even look at Sam when he said it. “I’m not your fucking boyfriend, which you’ve made very clear, by the way, so I’m not going to force you to do anything. But if you want a ride home and you don’t want to wake up choking on your own vomit in some random person’s studio apartment, the time is now.”

There was a beat of silence, and when Danny turned to look at Sam, he felt a stab of guilt when Sam gawked at him like he’d been slapped across the face. Sam let out a wordless scoff and pushed his way past Danny, turning to glare up at him.

“I can take care of myself,” Sam hissed, his words still blurry and drunk around the edges. “I don’t need you.”

“You won’t be thinking that tomorrow morning,” Danny countered fiercely. Sam rolled his eyes and began to descend the stairs, his sneakers slamming into each step as he ran away from Danny. Danny, as always, ran after him with a growing sickness in his chest. Sam stopped before he reached the front door, looking back at Danny one more time.

Danny knew he had to say it now. He wanted to. 

He wanted to beg Sam to calm down and to beg for his forgiveness, worshipping on his knees for his grace like he’d been doing for what felt like his entire life. 

But he didn’t. 

So out the door Sam went, slamming it and leaving Danny alone.

Again.

~~~ 

[masterjedilenawrites]

This might be an odd request, but what do the Bois and Batch do when their SO is wearing a swimsuit in their color (Blue for the 501st, Red/Black for the Batch)? Like, do they just fall deeper in love, or do they immediately get... Hard

[18+ below the cut, please and thank you]

Wolffe, Rex, and Echo are flustered beyond belief. They don't know how to react other than to blush, stumble over their words, and sneak long, adoring glances at you throughout the day. If they catch anyone else staring or being too suggestive with their compliments, they'll get so cranky. Best take them somewhere private so they don't feel as self-conscious about admiring you openly.

Fives, Kix, and Wrecker dig it, 110%. They would've already been checking out your suit, regardless of what it looks like. But these specific colors are a nice cherry on top. Their face instantly lights up. They'll whistle or give you some cheeky compliments. And they insist on you posing for some photos (which they may or may not look at during lengthy missions in the future). 

For Fox, Jesse, and Crosshair... instant boner. Honestly, anything in their colors will get their blood flowing, but a swimsuit? On their partner? Hoo boy.... They will need help hiding it if they're in a public place, or else get them somewhere private ASAP so they can get some relief. This reaction will happen every time you wear that suit, so just... be prepared is all.

Cody, Tup, and Hunter zone out as soon as they catch sight of it. Nothing else on the beach/at the pool matters but you in that swimsuit. They can't believe they are so lucky to be with someone like you, someone who looks so sexy but is also so thoughtful and wants to impress them. They'll be all over you for the rest of the day.

In all honesty, Dogma, Hardcase, and Tech don't notice right away. The colors, that is. They'll still check you out, openly or secretly, whatever their style is with these things. But it takes some time before it dawns on them that you purposefully wore this specific suit for them. It's their color-scheme that you're so proudly wearing on your beautiful body. They're goners at that point.

~ ~ ~

NSFW Everything Tag: @damerondala, @dangerousstrawberrypie, @harleyevanstan, @justanothersadperson93, @misogirl828, @itsagrimm, @theroguesully, @clonesimp, @techie-bear

+NSFW Clone & Bad Batch Tags: @marvel-starwars-nerd, @pandora-the-halfling, @darkangel4121, @sobstea, @rintheemolion, @dionysuskid21, @jesseeka, @hanbetired, @sarahtanmarvel, @call-me-a-fool, @lackofhonor, @theclonesdeservebetter, @hannahhearttcw, @kaijusplotch, @salaminus, @arctrooper69, @katzs-current-obsession, @501st-rexster, @rebel-finn, @writing-positivelyexisting, @nekotaetae, @pickle-rick-y, @lucyysthings, @severalseashellsbytheseashore

(Join my tag list here)

[dangertoozmanykids101]

TOOZ WRITING PROMPT

Today's inspirational exhibit shall feature some naughty nudies in Ascii coded images and any muse images where I could find our boys even near a computer.

I'm in the mood for some tech nerds and IT experts to work on our gal's system. Let's tell our heroine what she needs and what our talented muse can do for her.

Today is my brilliant husband's birthday. I will proudly brag that he is a golden boy in a pretty big pond. He is a problem solver and can learn anything he needs to on the fly.

I'll be honest - when he tells me about work, I get so turned on! He is sexy as all hell when he is achieving the impossible! Plus that man spoils me rotten with solutions to problems I never even knew I had, because there is always an easier way this or that could be done. He'll figure it out. From day one, this man has me wrapped around his finger!

So to celebrate hubby's birthday in my own little way, I'm posting a prompt for some tech talk telling our heroine about what can fit in her available slots.

Let's talk titties!

For your inspiration, I have collected a few ascii images and stuff, all on the topic of tits and ass. You can thank @latent-thoughts, @maple-seed, and @muddyorbs for this rabbit hole I fell down this afternoon.

This shot's from @sebstanlove on Instagram.

@caffiend-queen @nildespirandum @jtargaryen18 @so-easy-to-love-me @fictive-sl0th @gigglingtiggerv2 @acidcasualties @michelleleewise @muddyorbs @lokisgoodgirl @talklokitome @lokischambermaid @wolfsmom1 @alexakeyloveloki @redfoxwritesstuff @myoxisbroken @ladyoftheteaandblood @imanuglywombat @deceitfuldevout @spectre-posts @wiypt-writes @mochie85 @americasass81 @mastreworld @latent-thoughts @emeraldrosequartz @nekoamamori @mooncat163 @devikafernando

I'm trying to remember who got a kick outta these prompts ? If don't want to be tagged, no worries - just let me know. We all use Tumblr differently. And I am crazy disorganized, but I promise I will start a list this week!!!

[joyphuljellyphish]

Concert Review: Pink Talking Fish (2/3/24)

Allow me, if you will, to introduce you to a concept so wild, an idea so ludicrous, ingenious, and lofty, that it's never before been done (much less attempted): mastering the likes of Pink Floyd, The Talking Heads, and Phish. Three of the most abstract, conceptually intricate bands to exist. But woven together all at once. What musical nerds (or geniuses, take your pick) would attempt such a melding of music? Meet the Pink Talking Phish. Yes, you read that right. Yes, it is what you think it is.

What sort of people need to come together to form a band that not only aims for, but achieves, this complex musical mesh? Four ordinary, friendly guys - the kind that’ll stand in the cold and smoke a cigarette with you after the show and listen patiently to your review. 

First up is Eric Gould - seemingly unpresumptuous bassist who, in my humble opinion, is the glue of this helter-skelter band, as well as “the one who came up with this concept” - and it shows. Drawing inspiration from the likes of Cymande, Herbie Hancock, and Sly & The Family Stone, he touts an impressive resume as a previous member of the late and great Particle - another band known for exploring the edges and borders of genres.

Now that you’ve met the mad scientists behind this genius/insane-but-definitely-high experiment, let’s return to reality and the concert - held at Auburn’s Odd Fellows Lodge (ie, “The Foothill Fillmore”) and oh-so-generously hosted by Keep Smiling Productions. Let me set the scene: 

The first thing you’ll notice about the venue is the almost absurdly plush, deep carpeting under your feet (rare to encounter a carpeted venue, though understandable – especially as the night went on and beers were spilt). Your attention, though, will quickly be drawn to the entirety of the room; almost as if mass or a Girl Scout Badging Ceremony had recently ended, the cozy space features a single small stage (donned with proudly-displayed American flags hanging in the background) – and that’s about it. 

The simple, humble nature of the room was a perfect canvas for the signature light show frequently present at the venue – which deserves its own featured article, if you ask me. Beaming radiantly across every inch of all four walls was a psychedelic visual show straight out of the Electric Kool-Aid Acid tests. From graphics of sexy silhouetted women to new-wave-style minimalist flashes of black and white patterns, the awe-inspiring light show followed the vibrations and intensity levels of the band through every twist and turn.

I must admit, dear reader, that I found myself in line for a drink as the band started up - always a disappointment, but a commitment we make nonetheless. However, even from the next room over as I waited for my tequila and sprite, I could sense the energy of the crowd as the band kicked the night off with Phish’s “Ha Ha Ha” (these virgin ears took in this song for the first time that night; I’m still trying to wrangle the wild world of Phish).

By the time I’d returned to the lit-up and almost palpably-vibrating room, the band had sunk their teeth deep into an incredibly true-to-form version of Pink Floyd’s “Money” - the crowd had relaxed into a singular swaying mass of people sharing a journey together. 

Said journey took a quick turn as the band somehow perfectly transitioned from the dark and brooding “Money” into The Talking Heads’ “I’ve Got a Girlfriend”, a bouncy pick-me-up that prepared us for a personal highlight of the evening: a wild roller coaster ride on Phish’s “Bathtub Gin” - a song repeatedly teased at absolutely unexpected moments throughout the evening (smack dab in the middle of Floyd’s “Pigs”, for instance). “Gin” began as it typically would, with James slamming away on the keyboards and Kehoe pushing the song along with the ever-recognizable melody that carries the song. It wasn’t until we’d all thought the song was coming to a close that the real fun began; the collective tempo shifted from its laid-back walking pace to a gradual mosh-pit-worthy allegro that had us all struggling to keep up with dancing, especially atop such soft and lush carpeting.

First set ended with a funky stroll through Phish’s “Moma Dance”, a dance-y and laid-back respite after the hotfoot “Gin” we’d all expended our energy dancing our way through. And to great applause, the band exited, and the crowd smoked weed.

Set two began with a decision made by us, your humble dancers, after being posed the following quandary by the band: Would we rather hear Phish’s “The Curtain”, or the classic “Foreplay/Long Time” by Boston (allowed on the setlist, I later learned, because Phish has covered the song perhaps twice in their career)? To little surprise, the crowd opted for Boston’s energetic, dynamic hit - which was covered well, coming from someone who can admit she is not typically a Boston fan.

Whatever feelings I may have had about the “Foreplay” cover dissipated as the band tweaked a perfect transition into the complex orchestral masterpiece of Phish’s “Divided Sky”, sending the crowd rocketing into the sky onto a singular shared cloud of bliss — the emotional rollercoaster of this show, I cannot stress enough, was unlike any I’ve ever ridden. 

As quickly as the crowd had settled into the ethereal, dreamy rapture of “Divided Sky”, the band ripped the plush carpet from beneath our feet with a swift and sly maneuver into the raw ferocity of Floyd’s “Pigs.” As if previously asked, the crowd collectively floated down from our Cloud Nine of “Divided Sky” and raged with varying levels of passion to the band’s version of “Pigs”, which they did not rush nor alter much at all; I looked around to find the whole lot of us shouting the lyrics as if we were front and center at a political rally at one point – but hadn’t we just been blissed out in the Divided Sky?! As a reminder that indeed we had, the band dropped in a few appropriate-yet-inappropriately-placed teases of “Bathtub Gin.”

Upping the ante on tongue-in-cheek mood shifts, the band wrenched us from a long and angsty “Pigs” right into the bubbly, lovey-dovey “Home (Naive Melody)” by The Talking Heads. And suddenly, we were lifted back up as one and our distressed emotive faces quickly morphed into those full of love, marriage proposals, feelings of young love, yadda yadda. As light and joyfully as David Byrne’s lamp, the crowd bopped and melted to the gushy lyrics of one of the best love songs of all time (if you ask me - which you can, and I’ll tell you I’m correct). The quite literally shocking emotional exchange from “Pigs” into “Home” was perhaps my favorite moment of the night - an act of dark comedy and a commentary on all the shit in life I love to critique. A major kudos to the band for this boldly satirical choice.

[cafeconbrujeria]

a couple of new people here, it looks like! presumably from Bree-land?

this is my occult side blog where I routinely fail to document anything I'm actually doing. occasionally I reblog some stuff or yell into the discourse void.

I am a South American and Caribbean blend Latina and grew up practicing what you might call Santeria, or Lukumí, and neither of those words exactly conveys it right but I usually use the former. I was initiated as a child and I am, proudly, a daughter of Oshun.

Here is my thesis statement: the sexy and rebellious thing to do if you grow up in one of the Afro Caribbean Diaspora traditions is to go through a very cringe Wiccan or Nordic magic phase. This is actually vital. Everybody I know who carries any aspect of their cultural specific practices into adulthood went through a sulky teen phase via Silver Ravenwolf or whatever.

Thesis two: a lot of the people writing about the ATRs right now are grifters.

These things are actually connected. IRL, your average real deal latin occultist carrying the torch into adulthood is a fucking nerd. Particularly if you're from an immigrant family, if you grew up doing legit magic, and you enjoy it, you end up learning about a lot of different magic, based on whatever else is around you when you are, specifically, not in the homeland anymore.

so while there are many, many workings that are done strictly as taught, and if you add a crystal to it, no, it's not the same--

most real people incorporate a ton of syncretic stuff into their practices.

anyone who makes their living screaming at random people about how their personal practices are invalid because said person is also into runes or yoga? red flag. that's somebody playing a role, and not very well. it's someone embodying a stereotype to bully their potential competition out of the market. it is someone weaponizing your guilt to make sure you buy THEIR brand of candle/oil/whatever.

and they probably don't actually know any old traditional shit, either.

that said, it's not fucking "road opener" oil without Abre Camino in it. it's the name of a fucking plant. the end.

[darklylucid]

Creepy Sexy Bug Nerd Round #3

Asa Emory. ‘The Collector’. This vile, sadistic, morally reprehensible man’s  stranglehold on my heart has continued unabated for almost an entire year now and shows no signs of weakening, but there’s one place where he’s had the most profound effect - in my dreams.

I’m no stranger to having full-colour, violent, vibrantly detailed, blood-soaked dreams, I’ve been having then since I was a child, and it’s quite literally the meaning behind my username, I lucid dream darkly.

Those dreams most people consider true nightmares, those heart-pounding visions of terror that make you wake up screaming in a cold sweat, too frightened to even think of setting one foot outside of the safety of your warm bed are the ones I yearn for every single night, and I wouldn’t trade them, as they say, ‘for all the gold in the world’.   

As an adult, however, more often than not, these particular dreams tend to have a decidedly erotic twist to them, and when you take into consideration all the things I associate with Asa Emory, pain, pleasure, death and debauched carnality, is it any wonder that my wonderfully perverse subconscious blessed me with a dream so wickedly decadent, so self-indulgent, it puts all others to shame...?

May I proudly present my third Asa Emory dream in which I ruled over a gloriously horrific carnal bacchanal of epic proportions like a queen at court...

If you’re interested, here are the links to the posts I made about the two previous dreams he’s been in:

Creepy Sexy Bug Nerd Round #1

Creepy Sexy Bug Nerd Round #2

Warning - non-graphic mentions of violence, torture, sex and murder under the cut…oh, what depraved things my dreams are made of…

In the dream, I was sitting in the middle of a black silk-covered mattress that made up the floor of a massive square-shaped room that had neither doors nor windows, but instead of feeling trapped, I felt comforted by the claustrophobia it might have otherwise inspired.

The walls were painted the same shade of red as freshly spilled blood and were ringed with dozens of antique gold candle holders that lit the room in flickering shadows, and all around me were hundreds of people engaged in all manner of debauched activities that included, often simultaneously, sex, torture, mutilation and murder.

Nothing was out of bounds, nothing sacred or taboo in this room, and all around me were people screaming in both pain and pleasure, fear and desire, and on the blood-soaked mattress within arm’s reach were a number of improvised ‘sex toys’ that included both a ‘pear of agony’ and a set of ‘thumbscrews’, both liberally streaked with blood.

I wasn’t partaking in the ‘fun’ myself, but was instead happily revelling in the unholy symphony of sounds coming from the throats of my ‘subjects’ and got the distinct impression that every act in this orgy was being performed as a tribute in my honour.

Everyone in the room was keeping a respectful distance from me...except for one couple immediately to my right and close enough to touch, a masked man all in black with his back to me and hunched over the prone body of a woman, and when I shifted on the mattress and peeked around his body to see who it was, IT WAS ASA.

I couldn’t see what he’d done to her, but I knew that she’d be dead soon from the injuries he’d inflicted, and since I was immeasurably pleased to see him, I grinned, spoke up and said to him, “Are you having fun, Asa?”

He shifted around on the mattress until he was crouched beside me, and then he gave me a twistedly sadistic grin, reached forward, fisted the length of my hair in his hand, yanked me forward and KISSED ME with blood-flecked lips through the mask.

OMGFG YES

It was pure, undiluted carnality, brutally dominant, possessive and actually a bit frightening in it’s intensity. It actually HURT. He kissed me like he wanted to fucking eat me ALIVE, and I would’ve let him.

Asa Emory is the only slasher (except for maybe Jesse, who is a very close second...) for whom I would willingly drop to my knees and call ‘master’, this is officially the third dream in which he’s been flirtatious with me, and if this kiss is only a small taste of what he can make me feel, sweet Jesus...I’m in trouble... 

Taglist: @imbleedin-out

[queenshelby]

JUST FRIENDS – PART 11

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Smut

Words: 1,235

Notice: There will be two more parts in this series!

Whilst you broke the news of your engagement rather quickly, you kept the news about your pregnancy quiet for now. But, when you reached 16 weeks, there was no hiding anymore.

Your belly had become rather large from carrying the twins and baggy clothes weren’t really your style.

It was a Sunday morning on which you decided to break the news to Hendrix, Charlie and Max over some pancakes.

You weren’t sure how they would react but, of course, you hoped for the best.

‘So, your dad and I have something to tell you’ you began, nervously sipping on your glass of orange juice.

‘What is it?’ Hendrix, Cillian’s eldest son, asked.

‘Well, before Christmas, you will have two more little brothers to play with’ you explained, rubbing your belly.

‘Oh? Two more? Where are they?’ Max asked and you lifted up your shirt slightly and showed him.

Cillian’s sons were quick to ask whether they can feel your belly too and, of course you, agreed just before Cillian showed all of the boys an ultrasound picture.

You could see their little minds ticking over and, after an initial moment of excitement followed by silence, Charlie began to ponder.

‘So, how did they get into your tummy?’ he asked, causing your and Cillian’s eyes to widen.

‘Your dad can answer this one’ you giggled, looking at Cillian.

‘They had sex’ Hendrix then said with disgust on his face. He had only recently read up about it after he raised exactly the same question when his aunt gave birth to his little cousin. But, just as he said this, Cillian almost choked on his coffee.

‘Listen, uhm, I will explain this to you guys after another cup of coffee. Until then, I need you guys to get dressed so that we can go to the zoo’ Cillian said somewhat embarrassed and you couldn’t help but laugh.

***

After Cillian sat the boys down for a discussion on how babies are made, you made your way to the zoo with your grandmother and the first thing Max said to her was that he will be a big brother soon.

But your grandmother already knew. She could sense it by the way you had been acting lately and was excited nonetheless.

When she heard that you were having twin boys however, she was rather surprised.

‘Five boys in the house. You guys will be busy’ she then said.

‘Oh, yes we will be’ you giggled as you proudly rubbed your belly and smiled at Cillian who had already become obsessed with your pregnant body.

***

In fact, he became so obsessed with it that, every night, he told you how insanely beautiful and sexy you were once the boys were fast asleep.

Tonight, was going to be one of those nights and, as you were standing in the kitchen, making yourself a cup of tea, Cillian approached you.

He slid his right hand down your body, slowly caressing your throat, over your large breasts and up and over your round belly. He started to pull up your nightgown, giving that stretched-out fabric some relief as he pulled it off you so it could rest in the crevasse between your boobs and your belly.

‘You are incredible Y/N. I love seeing you so full and round, carrying my babies’ Cillian whispered and you closed your eyes, touched his hand on your belly and smiled.

‘Hmm…I love it so much. I love the way I feel, I love the way you touch me...’ you whispered.

Within mere seconds, Cillian pulled your nightgown up and over your head, leaving you completely naked in the kitchen. In return, you reached up, grabbed his shirt and yanked it off over his head.

Cillian then slid his hand down underneath your belly and cups his hand around your mound. He doesn’t even need to put his hand between your legs to know how moist you are. Ever since you had become pregnant, your sex drive had increased significantly and, when Cillian began to slowly massage your groin area, you flexed and tightened your legs together and shivered.

‘It feels so good when you do that’ you whispered and Cillian nudged your legs apart and pushed two of his fingers into you gently.

You couldn’t help but moan loudly. You were absolutely dripping wet and he started sliding his fingers in and out of you slowly, gradually increasing his pace.

‘Common, let’s continue this in the bedroom’ Cillian then suggested and you nodded eagerly.

Before you knew it, you were both naked on the bed and his fingers found their way back into your wet mound. He bent his head down and started to kiss your belly before descending further down to your wetness.

‘Oh god yes Cillian’ you moaned as he began to circle his tongue over your clit while continuing to fuck you with his fingers.

But his fingers weren’t what you wanted that night. You needed Cillian’s cock inside you so desperately that you immediately started to beg for it.

‘Please...’ you moaned. ‘Please Cillian, I need your cock inside me’ you begged, causing Cillian to chuckle.

He was happy to comply with your request and sat up on his knees, rubbing your belly with one hand and squeezing your breast with the other.

He pulled your legs apart in front of him and slid his hands under your back to lift you slightly. Then, without warning, he slid his cock into you and, as soon as he did that, you were hit with a sensation of pure pleasure. You yelped with delight, and again Cillian had to slap his hand over your mouth as you were way too loud.

‘You are so fucking sexy like this’ Cillian groaned, watching you moan and squirm beneath him as he fucked you.

‘Oh, fuck, you feel so good. Give it to me, give it to me hard...I'm all yours...you filled me up so round with our babies and I want you to take me’ you moaned.

The way you spoke to him drove Cillian wild and he grabbed hold of your hips and drilled his cock deeper and deeper into you.

‘More, more…oh god’ you groaned, full of lust and desire and didn’t take long until Cillian could feel you tighten and moisten.

‘Cum around my cock Y/N’ Cillian groaned and so you did, clenching around him as your orgasm washed over you.

The feeling made him lose all control and he started to cum himself, shooting his hot cum into.

You moaned, louder and louder as you climaxed in unison until, eventually, the feeling subsided and you both allowed you to come down from your high.

After Cillian pulled out of you, you rolled onto your side and allowed him to spoon you from behind. He kissed you on the back and gently stroke your belly, feeling your babies stir in your womb.

‘I think we should have some more kids after the boys are born. What do you think?’ Cillian asked in awe with your pregnant body.

‘You are kidding right?’ you asked, thinking that, clearly, five children between the two of you is more enough.

‘I was actually thinking that you could get a vasectomy’ you then laughed, causing Cillian to swallow harshly.

‘I don’t think so’ he chuckled.  

 Tag List:

@lilymurphy03 @deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-my-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15  @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r  @tellingyouastory  @captivatedbycillianmurphy​  @namelesslosers​  @littlewhiterose​  @ttzamara​  @ttzamara @cilleveryone  ​

@peaky-cillian​

@severewobblerlightdragon​  @ysmmsy​  

Cannot Tag (please check your settings):

@l0tsofpennies @trolleydolly @avonlady1985 @chrisevanshoeee @daydreamingnymph @fookingshelby  @thenattitude

[dirtycccat]

the demon bros + (un)dateables  drunk

tw for drinking so if you’re not into that yeah be warned. also there’s some mentions of horniness because uhhh,,,ya know

 Lucifer

normal soft drunk

it’s neither too easy nor too hard to get him drunk

also his drink of choice is probably wine really really expensive wine

he has a pretty high tolerance but not as high as his party animal bros

since it looks like he drinks pretty often if you look at all the alcohol in his  mancave  study

it’s canon he’s a soft drunk??? which,,,, cute

but also chaotic af

i feel like he just reverts to angel lucifer? the really cute innocent baby that’s also very, very chaotic (think of lesson 37+ luci which i only saw screenshots of but still)

expect him to do a 180: if he’s a stern emotionally constipated dad sober drunk luci is basically him with 0 filters but a lot of emotion

he’ll make weird dad jokes, tell people he cares about them, ask dumb dumb questions that he thinks about daily but never voices

“ok mc but what is lol actually and why does levi say that all the time. wait why are you laughing… lots of love? ok then I send you lol”

prefers to drink with close friends and family only because he knows how he gets when drunk

will not admit it but he enjoys being able to feel so?? free and say whatever he wants since he feels like he can’t normally

Mammon

heavy weight hyper puppy

he has a pretty high alcohol tolerance probably since he’s into partying

also he knows his limits because of past experiences

but sometimes limits are made to be broken

and once they’re broken oh boy

drunk mammon is just him but hyper

or more like even more hyper

i feel like he’d become as excited as a golden retriever on redbull in the first 4 hours

dancing with everyone, making crack jokes, getting into weird situations

and then if he drinks a liiitle bit too much

he’d just break down

and cry

and be an emotional mess

which ends up in him crying over your/ his bros’ shoulder telling everyone he loves them

and then end up falling asleep

so you have to take turns carrying him to bed and make sure he’s safely tucked in with a glass of water close by

you don’t mind though since usually he makes sure you get home safe when you go drinking 

Leviathan

heavy weight emotional drunk 100%

another boy that sleeps near a bottle of alcohol so he probably drinks regularly

if you’re in your room all day it’s pretty easy to just do it since you’re safe so he does it whenever he feels like it

this jealous boy can fake being chill while sober but once you get him drunk expect tears, angry rants, yelling, semi-public mental breakdowns

you always end up having to put him into bed while he cries on your shoulder all the while you try to lift this surprisingly heavy boy into his bathtub bed

but also since he’s the most artistic of the family I bet sometimes he does art while drunk?

you once went to his room trying to return a manga you took and oh no levi is painting a 2 meters ruri mural while he’s in the nude

don’t question it it helps him concentrate

sometimes sad bitch energy mixed with alcohol equals great things

he’s also in the lowkey horny drunk category

what can you do it happens when you’re a touch starved nerd,,, all alone in your room,,, drinking

 Satan

light weight happy drunk

two glasses of wine and he’s gone

remember like all cards with satan drinking? yup he’s a happy drunk

if sober he’s like ugh partying is for nerds

drunk satan just wants to party with everyone

and vibe

he’ll invite everyone to take group shots, dance all night, do weird shit that ends up being photographed (to his next day hungover dismay)

he’s terrible at club dancing but he will be found in the middle of the dancefloor going wild

expect embarrassing dancing at first

but if you want to correct him he won’t say no to dancing with you more,,, intimately

may or may not grab your hands and start waltzing at some point though

(you think it’s great he’s so happy and free so it doesn’t matter)

  Asmodeus

heavy weight horny drunk

has the highest alcohol tolerance since he’s the party animal of the family

lmao what did you expect

drink of choice is probably devilgrammable cocktails: fun, sexy, colorful just like him

he’s the definition of babe let’s drink so we can have wilder sex

loves how oversensitive he feels while drunk??? and how his senses get overwhelmed

will moan out loud if he bumps into a table while drunk no shame, no regrets

and dance really lasciviously with whoever catches his eye

if you’re romantically involved not only will he grind into you or let you do so with him

but expect lap dances

if you surprise him with lap dances instead expect to be,,,, rewarded wink wink

but if you do something meaningful for him or give him tthoughtful compliments 

he will go into his emotional mode and literally hug you and never let go 

...and you’ll have to spend your night in his arms while he tells you all about how he thinks you’re perfect for him and how thankful he is that you’re in his life

expect some tears in those moments (that he tries to hide while you casually pretend they’re not there in the first place)

Beelzebub

 idk normal tolerance and emotional drunk

since he’s HUGE it’s probably not super easy to get him drunk but also since he doesn’t really drink much it’s not hard either

talks about issues and cries

a lot

so he doesn’t drink all that much

and only does it with his family

him and belphie always end up cuddling and falling to sleep together if they both get drunk since they are both emotional messes when alcohol is involved

and you join them too if you’re drinking with them

Belphegor

heavy weight emotional drunk but on the angry side

like his twin but he probably...drinks more?? he’s such a sad bitch I mean c’mon

like his bro he’s an emotional drunk

sad crying, angry crying, just crying

that’s him that’s what you get into if you tell him to drink with you

will get in the stabby mode if too drunk

so don’t let him drink too much if you value your and his life  

...rather cuddle him until he gets too comfy and warm and falls asleep 

works every time

Diavolo

normal tolerance sleepy drunk

is used to drinking because of social gatherings and high class etiquette but he doesn’t indulge often

since he mostly drinks with luci, barbatos and you

high key prefers sweet cocktails instead of normal fancy drinks

i bet if you took him to the club he’d want to try out the weirdest most colorful cocktails

and then make barbatos redo them

can hold his liquor but he’s still a sleepy boy? like alcohol probably calms him and he’s just so comfortable and at peace he just,,, naps with his head on your shoulder (or luci’s, or barbatos’ depends who he’s drinking with or who’s closest to him at the moment)

if he’s in the club though it’s a different story

he goes full dad mode

doing all the embarrassing dad dances but proudly

remember the meme with prince william or whatever in the club? that’s him

A+ for effort though he really becomes the life of the party

 Barbatos

heavyweight vodka aunt

doesn’t really get drunk drunk since he has to take care of diavolo 24/7

but once it’s self care day

oh boy

he turns into a single suburbian mom

you’d think he’s the sophisticated wine mom but oh no

closes all doors and windows, puts on a hot bath with scented oils, lights candles, plays soft jazz in the background

and then drinks straight liquor out of the bottle

(like that one vine)

if you’re close and drink together he’ll also talk a lot more than usual

and give you fun stories about the bois and diavolo

“mc did i tell you about the first week lucifer and his brothers came to the devildom and had to cook for themselves for the first time in their lives? lucifer did not know how an oven works and that you have to close it after you’re done cooking and almost burned the whole house of lamentation down.”

 Simeon

light weight spaced out drunk

do not give him alcohol unless you want to experience weird random xD simeon

physically he’s here, spiritually he’s astral projecting

looks the same, smiles handsomely, no change here

...but if you try talking to him he’ll say the weirdest shit like

“mc do you think that the stars know that they are loved and we watch them every day”

uh idk simeon??? what do you think???

if you’re romantically involved he will flirt shamelessly, even more shamelessly than usual 

because,,, he’s just more honest so he just says whatever

people get uncomfortable around you two and end up backing off and leaving you alone

surprising enough or not he looks like he’s also a lowkey horny drunk

ofc you can’t tell since he’s so chill all the time

but I bet you he’s horny inside hornier than asmo

Solomon

heavyweight deep drunk

this boy has done some drinking in his lifetime 

...since he has whiskey grandpa vibes

will say really out of the blue thoughtful things??? which is so not like sober solomon 

“mc you remind me of one of the people that meant the most to me they too were here for me and believed in me when no one else did and I have to thank you for that”

wow solomon that sure was random since you were talking about how cold it is outside before but thank you i guess

fakes being not drunk easily but you can tell the moment he starts speaking that he’s gone

also looks at you straight in the eyes when he talks to you

and sometimes starts giggling or blushing

which makes you go??????? solomon are you okay

[zepskies]

Home Cooking

Summary: Now that you and Dean have a daughter, living at the bunker with Sam means you get to be more domestic, to varying degrees of success. Dean learns to enjoy your attempts at cooking.  

Pairing: Dean x Female Reader  Word Count: 1,200 Warnings: Implied sexy times, mostly fluff

Sure, Sam’s got the whole brooding nerd thing covered.

He could tell you about a piece of art modeled off some technique people came up with centuries ago, and come up with math in his head faster than Dean can eat a Snickers (and Dean proudly owns a record of 3.6 seconds).

Hell, between Sam and Charlie, they could probably hack into the Pentagon if you give them twenty-four hours.

So yeah, the guy knows a lot of shit about a lot of shit. But Dean likes to think he knows some shit too.

He may not have his brother’s IQ, but he knows how to read people. He knows when something’s not on the up and up, can watch people lie and maneuver them right where he needs them to get a breakthrough on a job.

He’s seen a couple hundred species of monster in his life, and he’s cut up a few hundred. Maybe a thousand.

He sees more blood and gruesome gore than he cares for.

Maybe that’s why he stops, and can’t help but watch you cook. 

It’s part of the reason why Dean is glad they moved more permanently into the bunker, that they have the time to make actual food. He thinks you do it out of habit, from when it was just the two of you, plus your infant daughter in that house for a year. When he thought Sam was in Hell.

It still feels kind of like that now, just with the addition of Sam (not soulless), and now Kevin in their makeshift family.

Dean thinks, by the way you concentrate when you’re measuring—pouring water exactly to the little blue line on the measuring cup, sucking in your lower lip until he’s sure you must be hurting yourself—that you’re an absolute perfectionist. Which is what’s getting you so frustrated.

It’s also what makes you their sniper shot on the hunt, and damn-near elegant at carving up monsters.  

But when it comes to food (bless your heart), Dean knows you’re trying your best. Even though the meals are pretty hit or miss (especially breakfast), he’s no chef, so he really can’t judge. He also doesn’t have the heart to tell you when the pancakes are so burnt they smell a bit like sulfur.

(Actually, it’s really because he can’t afford any more bruises.)

But it’s also kind of adorable that you try so hard to give him what he loves. And what he loves is good food, and you.

However.

Dean likes to sit from his chair at the kitchen table with a newspaper and uses his mug of coffee (or a beer) to supervise when you fry things.

“Fuck you, Dean. I know what the hell I’m doing!” you gripe at him, pretending to be annoyed by his presence while scooping a burger patty out of the boiling oil.

“Pay attention to what you’re doing,” he reminds you while flipping the page, and almost sighs when he hears a pained squeak and a string of colorful, muttered curses.

“Let me know when to break out the ice,” he adds, hiding a grin behind his newspaper.

“Shut up,” you grouse. “I’m trying to meat-flip here!”

Sam, Dean and Kevin stay out of the literal hot zone that is the four-foot perimeter around the stove when you fry things.

And more often than not, it’s the three of them that get stuck with the mess of exploded oil afterward, when you so conveniently pull the “our baby girl wants me to read to her before bed” card, when they all know the four-year-old reserves that role almost exclusively for Sam.

But Dean would be lying if he said he doesn’t stare when you dance to the radio, spatula in one hand and a salt canister in the other. You bounce to the beat long enough to season what might turn out to be a good meal (you do pretty good on spaghetti), then lose track of yourself trying to stir sauce at the same time.

Dean watches you practically skip to each of your stations—stove, cutting counter for vegetables, and the cherry pie in the oven that you don’t know he knows you’re baking—until you pause, glancing over your shoulder.

You quirk a brow at him, curiosity in your eyes.

“What’re you smiling about?” you ask.

Dean catches himself and goes back to scanning the news.

“Food smells good.”

“Well, you asked for chicken parm, so that’s what you’re getting,” you reply, and you check the meat to see if it’s cooked through yet.

“…Probably. Shit,” you mutter quietly, so you think Dean doesn’t hear you panicking. “Looked different on Pinterest.”

Dean unconsciously smiles as he watches you test the tomato sauce out of the corner of his eye.

“Can’t wait,” he says.

“And there’s a surprise dessert…just promise you won’t steal any from your daughter’s plate this time.” You send him a pointed look. “She’s just as sensitive as you are with your food.”

This time, Dean has to chuckle and can’t help but tease you a little. “No promises.”

He’s not surprised when you bring out the pie after dinner. The candle on top throws him off, though. He didn’t even remember…

“Happy Birthday,” your lips whisper against his after you kiss him thoroughly, despite complaints in the background from both your daughter and Kevin. Sam just smiles a small, contented smile.

Dean pulls you onto his lap. He feels warm, complete in a way he never thought possible again. His grip on your hips tighten, and he presses a lingering kiss to your forehead. 

“Thanks, sweetheart,” is all he can say.

The pie is actually pretty fucking delicious. The crust is all buttery and the filling is rich and melty at the same time. Dean hates to be cliché, but it’s a small piece of literal heaven on a goddamn plate.

Then he has to kiss you again, properly, because even with all your mishaps, Dean knows you just want to give him and Sam a good home-cooked meal every time they’re home. Because for once they have a home. No one’s missing their soul and they’re finally getting to live like a family.

So, maybe Dean doesn’t catch everything.

But eventually his surprise birthday dinner comes to an end. Kevin disappears into his room and Sam ushers your little girl upstairs to get ready for bed.

Dean realizes how domestic he looks, is, while washing the army of pots and pans you used for cooking while you put away the leftovers. He doesn’t mind doing these kinds of chores, because it gives him quiet moments like these with you.

And you’re fucking beautiful to him, even now, with a piece of crusty tomato in your hair from when it splattered in the pan earlier. (And shit, is that another oil burn on your neck?)

“Dean,” you call him quietly, rousing him from his bout of staring at you.

“Yeah?”

A sly smile spreads across your face as you slowly pull a can of whipped cream from behind your back, along with the last slice of pie.

“Ready for your real present?”

Dean’s brows shoot up, a smirk curving his lips. Well, he always has room for his two favorite desserts.

The suggestive sway of your hips while Dean follows you up the stairs to your shared room is all he needs to really appreciate your cooking.   

Here’s another lil’ oneshot for Dean. Let me know what you think!

Dean Winchester One-Shots

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Supernatural Masterlist

Main Masterlist

[coeurdastronaute]

Essays In Existentialism: Nerd 13

Previously on Nerd

“One more time,” Lexa called out, walking backwards to the other end of the lane, her sneakers kicking up some dust as she moved and watched the playback on her phone. 

“Your girlfriend is a little intense, eh?” Evan asked as he followed Clarke back to the start of their scene. 

Clarke looked up and wiped a little sweat from her brow as she watched Lexa move with Luna, talking about something, watching her phone while Luna juggled a camera and a script that’d seen better days. The messy waves were tamed, tied up and hidden by a baseball hat from her sister’s university, well-tattered and sweat-lined. The sleeves on her shirt were rolled up, exposing a slight bit of bicep, her jeans were caked in dirt and mud. 

“She’s hot though, right?” 

“I’m not answering that.” 

“I’ll allow you to answer it just this once.” 

“In a weird way, yeah, I guess,” he shrugged. “Ow! What the fuck?” 

“She’s super hot in a normal way,” Clarke informed him after socking his arm. 

“I meant like, I never considered it. Like, weird in a way I hadn’t considered. I’d prefer not to think of her like that, but you made me.” 

“Good, and you’ll never think of her like that ever again.” 

“Let’s give it one more go, and this time, Evan, I want you to pause before you answer Clarke. I want her words to ring for a moment. Play it how you think your character would feel it. Just for fun.” 

He nodded and Clarke smiled at how serious Lexa was, how intricately she thought about the scene. They’d been at it for three weeks and were nearly finished, toiling away after school as best they could, and Clarke found that she didn’t think she was the world’s greatest actress, but that she did enjoy seeing her girlfriend doing something she was insanely passionate about. There’s a bit of magic in seeing someone happy about something they enjoy. As silly as it might have seemed, Clarke let her imagination wonder to the idea of Lexa actually achieving her dream, of making things. She jumped twenty years, and Lexa was the exact same person, but different, but better, somehow. It was silly, but it helped. 

“Notes for me, sir?” she ventured. 

“You’re perfect. Keep being perfect.” 

As silly as it was again, Clarke smiled proudly and ignored the eye roll Luna gave before setting up with the camera again. 

In reality, it was about six more takes, two more requested by Luna, three requested by Evan, and once by Clarke. It was infectious to care and try to do better. But they were finally done with all else, and the end somehow felt so final. Though she’d been hesitant to try, now that they’d created something, Clarke felt connected to the entire thing. 

“So when will I get to see the entire thing?” Clarke asked, carefully dropping a bag of equipment on Lexa’s bedroom floor. 

“Oh, uh, maybe at the end of the summer? It’ll go through a ton of work with Luna and myself, and I’m not sure what we’re going to do… I will definitely show you though as soon as it is done.” 

“I’d hope so.”

“Thank you for helping me with this,” Lexa offered as she ran her hand over the back of her neck. “I know you are really busy. SAT, work, school, pep squad.” 

“And you’re not?” 

“Well, yeah, but I chose this, and you were recruited,” she shrugged. 

With a sigh, Lexa plopped onto her bed, tired and spent from the busy weekend. 

“You can recruit me anytime,” Clarke promised. 

In a move that was still somewhat new to Lexa, hips circled her own, and knees gripped her thighs, and that led to a lot of feelings in her body, especially in the below the belt part that she hadn’t particularly figured out in the practical sense. Theoretically she knew exactly what was happening. 

Without saying anything else, Clarke removed her girlfriend’s ball cap and tossed it on the bed. Lexa held her hips, ran her hands up her thighs and squeezed there, careful not to move her eyes anywhere but Clarke’s face. But they closed on their own when hands ran along her temples, scratching the sweat and soreness away, melting her instantly. 

There’d been a truce ever since the dance. There’d been a few make outs that went slightly past polite. There’d been a few time hands wandered lazily where they might not have been allowed, but didn’t care about no trespassing signs. There hadn’t been Clarke in her lap though, and Lexa knew this was different. She made it different when her hands slid around hips and toward Clarke’s ass. She squeezed and she thought she’d died. 

By the time Clarke kissed her, Lexa realized she was on her back in her bed with the head cheerleader on top of her. When hips pushed against her, she realized she was going to stop. Hands went to her chest. Hands slid under her shirt. Hands slid under her bra and she pushed back against being pinned. 

It all disappeared in a second, and confused at the loss of lips and contact, Lexa opened her eyes and searched. Clarke sat there, hands braced on her stomach until she lifted her own shirt and tossed it on the floor. Scrambling, Lexa lifted herself, tangling her arms in an attempt at solidarity in taking clothes off only to be aided by an amused girlfriend. 

“Wow,” she whispered, taking her time to look over new skin before her. She kept her hands locked on Clarke’s hips despite wanting to move them. She let her eyes roam shamelessly. “You’re like… wow.” 

“Is this okay?” 

“Very okay.” 

“Thank God,” Clarke nodded before leaning back down, cupping Lexa’s face, and kissing her again, fiercer this time, if it were possible. 

Hips moved more this time. Breathing picked up more. Hands pulled, tugged, grasped tighter. They clawed at each other and at more, at what their bodies already knew how to do but their brains overthought and tempered. It was a battle of want and need and restraint, and in it, they both knew which was losing. 

In a shaky attempt, Lexa somehow unhooked Clarke’s bra. And in an instant her girlfriend was topless on top of her, and now her lower half was absolutely made of lava. It was painfully molten. 

“Oh… my…. Goodness,” she hummed. 

Clarke pressed her hands harder against Lexa’s ribs and rotated her hips. Lexa slid her hands up Clarke’s chest and squeezed. She watched her hands moved and touch and feel. She was touching someone else’s nipples for the first time ever, which was a weird thing to be cognizant of, but something that she never imagined desiring. But she did. And she wanted to memorize it entirely. She earned a hum and she pushed her hips up, in an off-kilter response to Clarke’s hips. 

“Hey Lex, you home, sweetheart?” a voice called out from down the hall. 

The spell was broken. The frantic, hot buildup was drenched in freezing cold water. The skin on display was covered with shirts as quickly as possible and the contact of bodies was broken with as much space as humanely possible placed between them. 

“Yeah, uh,” Lexa cleared her throat and tucked in her shirt for some reason as she stood, her legs wobbly and her head not much more sturdy. “Just got home.” 

“Your mom is bringing home dinner. She got sandwiches from the deli.” 

“Sounds good!” 

“Want to work on your car?” 

“Yeah, I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

“Sounds good, kiddo. I’m just going to go change.” 

Her father’s voice faded as he moved toward his room. Lexa leaned against her door and looked back at Clarke in her room. The blonde just pushed her hair out of her face and tried to adjust her shirt, tugging her bra slightly from the quick reassembly of her parts. Her lips were puffy. Her cheeks were bright red. She was perfect, Lexa realized. 

Lexa cleared her throat again and redid her pony tail. 

“So that was--”

“Really good,” Clarke finished. “Maybe we should… it’s good your dad-- we should talk about this, right?” 

“Um, yeah, I think.”

“Not right now though.” 

“Of course, yeah,” Lexa nodded, unsure exactly what was going to be discussed and even worse when it would be. She needed more context clues because too much had just occurred, and she was a specifics type of girl. 

“I should head home. I have to finish some physics homework and take a cold shower.” 

“Right, yeah. It was hot out there today and I kept you out in the sun.” 

“Okay, we definitely are going to have to have some conversations.” 

“Am I in trouble?” Lexa asked, cocking her head as Clarke picked up her backpack and shouldered it, making her way to the door. 

“Not at all. I just want to be able to talk about sex with you before we do it because I imagine you might need it, and to be honest I’m not sure how much longer I can survive how sexy you are.” 

Sex. Clarke wanted sex. They had almost, Lexa imagined. And Clarke was talking about sex with her and wanted to talk about sex with her and wanted to have sex with her and talk about the having of sex with her and they were going to have sex. Having sex was an option that they were going to talk because they were going to have sex and they should talk about it. It was going to be a thing that was discussed between the two of them because sex was going to happen and it might have almost happened and they should talk about the sex that almost and might also in the future happen. Sex. 

“I’m kidding,” Clarke assured Lexa, pressing her hand to the center of her chest and bringing her back from the place she just died and went to. “I can wait however long we need to, but I think we should talk about it so something like this doesn’t happen and we don’t have a clear line drawn or not drawn. Think about where your line is, I guess and then we can talk about it.”

“Okay.” 

Clarke kissed Lexa’s cheek and then her jaw and then her neck and then her lips. 

“Are you okay?” 

“Mhm. Yes. Me okay. I’m okay. Always ok.” 

“Did I melt your brain with the mention of sex?” Clarke smiled. 

“Yeah, kind of.” 

“No rush, I promise. Just like to be prepared.” 

“Like a boy scout.” 

“Don’t stress. I like you.” 

“Mmm,” Lexa nodded and tried to make her eyes not be completely huge, tried to make her heart stop throbbing in her pants and ears, tried to make her brain not explode or melt. 

“I’ll talk to you later. Have fun with your dad.” 

“Mmm,” she hummed and nodded as Clarke moved past her toward the door. “See you tomorrow.” 

In an instant, Clarke was gone, and Lexa looked down at her hands. They’d been on Clarke’s naked boobs. She looked at her hips. They’d been on Clarke’s thighs. She looked at her bed and how surprised she was that her body just did some of the things it did. She wasn’t sure what else it was capable of, but she decided she might need to do research. 

XXXXXXXXXX

“I need to talk to you about two things.” 

“Hey, I’m good, thanks for asking. Just cramming for some finals, but yeah I definitely have time to help you out.”

“Okay, good,” Lexa nodded to herself as she paced through the garage, twisting a wrench around as she moved, twirling it around her fingers. It all happened quite seriously as she surveyed the car as it was coming to life. 

The house was empty, her parents out on a date. Luna was coming over shortly to work on some of their film, but Lexa had a few things she wanted to get done on her car. More than anything though, she needed to speak with her sister desperately regarding many things in her life. 

“How have you been, Lex?” 

“Pretty good.” 

“Anything planned for the summer yet?” 

“I have an internship with a film crew that’ll be in town for a few weeks. My history teacher’s old college roommate is first camera. Some movie of the week thing for the holidays.” 

“Wow! Lex, that’s huge!” 

“I guess. But I need to know about sex. Sex with another girl. You’re in college. Have you had sex with another girl?”

Anya choked on her sip of coffee as she stopped walking down the sidewalk. She nearly dropped part of her armload of books, but managed to get a grip at the last moment. 

“Sorry to disappoint, but I haven’t.” 

“I tried to ask Gus but he said he couldn’t talk to me about it, and I just need someone to tell me what to do because I’ve run out of online resources short of porn and to be honest I looked a few and I didn’t like it.” 

“Lots of information to unpack in this…” 

“What do I do or who do I talk to?” 

“Just give me a second, okay?”

With a sign, Lexa sat the phone down on the edge of the car and went about the tough work of running some wires through the rear panel. If she was doing something with her hand, then she didn’t have to repeat the word sex nine hundred times per minute in her brain. 

“You and Clarke are talking about having sex?” 

“We’re talking about talking about it.” 

“How long have you been dating?” 

“Um since beginning of November. Almost six months.” 

“Do you love her?” 

“I don’t know. I mean…” Lexa paused her movements and furrowed. She hadn’t thought of it like that. It seemed almost insane to quantify her feelings into one word. She was excited to always see Clarke, and when she had a bad day, Clarke was the only person she really wanted to see, and when she did, the bad day just melted away. How was she supposed to figure out if it was love when she couldn’t compare it to anything else? She got butterflies still, when she saw her girlfriend. And Lexa felt this weird need to do things for Clarke, without being asked. She was helpful and attentive because the payoff of Clarke’s smile was worth even a few minutes of forethought. But she hadn’t considered that love, but maybe it was. 

“I really don’t know. I like her a lot. I like how we are” 

“That’s fair. I guess I should rephrase it. What makes you think you’re ready to have sex?” 

“I really want to.” 

“Okay, yeah, well everyone really wants to have sex, but what makes you think you’re ready? Can you confidently say where your boundaries are? Are you ready to have a much more intimate relationship with someone?”

“I was kind of just looking for more help in the mechanics of it.” 

“That’s the easy part,” Anya smiled to herself as she took another sip of her coffee. The weather was changing, the spring breeze ruffled the trees so they loudly clamoured above as she moved with the crowd along the narrow sidewalk. “There’s a certain level of intimacy in having sex with someone, especially someone you really like. I’m not saying it’s good or bad, but it’s certainly different. Do you think you’re ready to do that?” 

“I think so,” Lexa murmured after a moment of contemplation. She tapped a screwdriver against her thigh and stared at a single screw. “I really want to make her feel good and I know that sounds stupid, but I just… Sometimes it’s easier to want to kiss her than tell her exactly what I feel. I want to show her.” 

“I can see how that would work. Just so long  as you take a good bit of time and really consider it. And remember, even if you agree, you can change your mind at any time.” 

“Ugh, not you too! Dad’s already given me a billion consent talks. I just want to go down on Clarke without making a fool of myself.” 

Anya couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the outburst, but she somehow managed to hold her phone away from her mouth as she did. It took her a moment to recover. 

“Just do what you like and listen to her. Ask her what she enjoys. Be receptive to how she sounds and moves. It’s really not that hard. Just give it your all.” 

“This is all fine advice, but I still don’t know how to actually do it.” 

“You’ll figure it out.” 

“I don’t like leaving it up to chance.”

“You’ll be fine, I promise. You care for Clarke and I think she’ll be able to show you a thing or two.” 

“What does that mean?” Lexa paused her movements and furrowed. 

“You’ll see.” 

“I really don’t like the sound of that.” 

“You will, I promise.” 

“Are you coming home this summer?” 

“I might. So, sex with your girlfriend, huh?” 

“Maybe. Is it weird that I just… I want everything to keep going how it has been? It’s been so easy and nice and I didn’t think dating Clarke would be so … so… easy?”

“That’s not weird at all. It sounds like you are having a good time.” 

“I’m going to ask her to go to prom.” 

“Wow,” Anya smiled to herself, doing her best to sound surprised by the news, as if it wasn’t customary to take once’s girlfriend to prom. “Are you going to do a big ask?” 

“Nah, I don’t think that’s me,” Lexa shrugged, even though no one would see it. “And I don’t think it’s Clarke. She’s not like… she’s not like what I would have thought. She’s better.” 

“You’ve got it bad.” 

“Nah.” 

It was nice to talk to her sister. It was nice to be put at ease, even if she just heard a bunch of stuff she already knew. Lexa wasn’t sure how it came to be that she was someone who talked to her sister every few days and actually filled her in on her life. She wasn’t sure how she enjoyed spending Saturday morning with her parents going on a hike or breakfast. She wasn’t sure how it came to be that the head cheerleader was soft and quiet and warm and made her feel like she was full of helium, but it was all happening, and Lexa felt herself open up to the world again without ever realizing she had been closed. 

XXXXXXXXXX

For an entire seventy-two hours, Lexa let it all rattle around in her head, the words and the ideas and the thought of it all. All at once it felt like she didn’t know what came next while also incredibly knowing and that held her stuck. She hadn’t thought to ask for more, and she wasn’t sure how to have it. She knew that it was important, and she knew that was a different step than the ones she’d already taken. 

Nothing seemed to change with Clarke though. 

Lexa still held her girlfriend’s hand between classes, and they still hung out and texted and kissed and no one said anything despite Lexa taking her sister’s advice to really think about what it all meant. 

She didn’t know what it meant. Not truly. 

“That’s it. I quit. My brain is melting out of my ears.”

With an exaggerated flourish, the body on the bed flopped over and tossed a notebook onto the floor. Eyes rolled back before a tongue hung out and Lexa smiled from her spot at her desk. The music played softly from the speaker on the bookshelf. It was already dark outside as they worked on studying, but the lights reflected so that outside didn’t exist at all. 

“Your brain isn’t melting. It’s just growing and growing and will soon explode.” 

“I think I prefer the melting,” Clarke sighed. 

Lexa smiled to herself because there was the head cheerleader laying in her bed. And Clarke was wearing her old soccer sweatshirt and she was tired from after work, but still stopped by before heading home just for a few hours of studying. 

“Would you like to go to prom with me?” 

“Me?” 

“Yeah you,” Lexa decided, cocking her head slightly. The corpse in her room rolled over again and lifted her head. “With me.” 

“Was it the melting brain thing that really sold you?” 

“I just like how you look in my bed.” 

“Your bed is very comfortable.” 

“I thought about the sex thing and I don’t know if I’m ready right now, or by prom or whatever, but I want to just keep doing things slowly if that’s okay?” 

Clarke sat up so she was kneeling on the bed. She’d already rolled the sleeves of the sweatshirt that hung a little long on her. There was a hole over the letter on the left part of her chest. Her hair was falling out of a messy bun, and her cheeks had their dimples in them. Lexa took a moment to remember it. 

“That’s fine by me.” 

“It is?” 

“I like how fluid everything is with you. I just wanted you to be aware of what you were feeling and what your limits were.” 

“I don’t know them right now, but I’ll know them as things happen, if that’s okay.” 

“Very okay.” 

“Do you want to go to prom with me?” 

“Didn’t I already say yes?” 

“No.” 

“Well then, yes.” 

“Cool,” Lexa grinned, holding her chin on her palm. 

Clarke relaxed slightly and smiled back. 

“Cool.” 

NEXT

[ryderztcap]

Just being a nerdy ass Dork lord showing off all my recent swag. My Helluva boss Verosika Mayday shirt, Captains Gym Shirt , glasses fit for a sexy nerd. Then Casually lifting Thor’s hammer lol then I collect pins at hot topic and put them in my beanie.

Mainly I really just wamt d to taken pride in myself and proudly scream once more I am a proud dork and my only regret is being poor so I can’t get more nerdy swag :p

[trashyswitch]

Illogical Hobbies (Or so he Thought)

Logan is struggling with being seen as unreliable or biased in his logic. Why? Because the man likes tickling and he's super embarrassed about it. Looking for help from anyone, Logan decides to talk to Remus about his dilemma. Remus quickly proves to be open-minded, and even excited about Logan's interest!

This fanfic has some dirty jokes and ultimate gay moments. Whether Intrulogical is platonic or intimate in this fanfic...I have no idea. It could be read as both. Just keep an open mind, knowing that this is Remus and Remus us well...dirty.

Also: this fanfic was suggested by 🦂 person. Hi 🦂 person! Sorry it took weeks.

Other than that: I hope you enjoy!

For @kanene-yaaay

Logan had been struggling with his thoughts. For one of the first times in his life, Logan’s brain was overwhelming him with logical theories that haven’t been proven as of yet. The logical side now believed he might be a freak and as a result, is now unreliable for Thomas. This hypothesis was created due to his interest in one thing: tickling. He had seen the documentary they made about it. He had seen how uncomfortable people become due to others and their ‘feelings for tickling’. There are people who enjoy it as a…

Logan shivers. Despite his inability to hold onto biases up until this point...Logan had developed a strange reaction to the unspoken word. He just doesn’t like thinking about the word, let alone saying it. Society has managed to place so much of a bad condentation onto the word, that...saying it feels super wrong. Those types of topics are usually kept secret and are only discussed with people who you feel close to. Making sure the other person doesn’t mind talking about it might also be a good thing to check. You don’t want to end up in one of those one-sided conversations where you do all the talking while your friend only listens, nods and refuses to add input. That would be the last place Logan would want to get stuck in.

Logan sat down on his desk and clicked the pen to start writing. He drew out the people within the mind palace, and wrote down the pros and cons of talking about it with that person. Logan did this so that he could determine who would be the best person to go to, that wouldn’t be biased or rude about his...feelings. Yeah, feelings. He needed someone who wouldn’t look down upon him for being this way, and who would remind him that he is still the logical side who doesn’t let biases or conflicts get in the way of the truth.

Patton seemed like a good idea and he’d consider coming to him another time. But poor Patton’s already got so much on his plate. Patton’s been trying to help out Roman, who was still struggling with the truth that was told to him during the last conversation they had. Patton had gotten better acquainted with Janus by then, and was now struggling to find a stalemate between the light and the dark sides.

On top of that, Roman was also out of the question for more reasons than one. Again, Roman was going through a few different things involving his insecurities. Truth be told; Roman is now roughly 30 like Thomas is, so he should’ve been experiencing this phase long ago. But, late is better than never. Even if Roman weren’t stressed about his self-image, Logan would still turn down the prince because he found Roman too biased and rude over simple matters. It would be better to let Roman question things rather than be taunted by him for the rest of his days.

Virgil is more of a quiet citizen who probably would’ve handled it just fine. The emotional man has his own interests and hobbies that he often keeps from people as well. Example: his love for spiders. Patton would probably have a heart attack if Virgil admitted such a secret. But the one big con Logan had with Virgil was the chance he’ll let out a...strange reaction to the news. Whether it was gonna be a good or a bad reaction, was not something Logan wanted to test out.

Janus seemed like an interesting option as well. Yet despite his better understanding of the snake-like being, he began to wonder if Janus would be too manipulative or perhaps...too blunt. In this moment in particular, Logan felt he needed reassurance more than vague, or blunt answers. And knowing Janus...both possibilities stood out equally. So...Janus was off too.

Now Remus particularly stuck out to him. Remus would be blunt, but in a strangely charming way that would lessen the truthful blow. Remus would also be the most unbiased next to Patton because he’s learned about literally everything involving the subject. Remus might even have the recommended tools readily available in his room! Though Remus may immediately resort to assumptions about the interest...that’s about the only con Remus had under the list. Furthermore, Logan liked Remus. Maybe if there wasn’t a risk of getting physically injured, Logan would’ve had no cons under his name.

Logan threw away the chart and walked himself up to Remus’s room. Feeling nervous yet fascinated, Logan knocked on the door. He kept his knocks rather quiet, as to not disturb the other dark sides.

Remus opened the door and immediately pulled Logan into his room. Remus closed the door and planted a big, slightly bushy kiss onto Logan’s cheek. “Welcome Logan, to my sexy chamber of secrets~!” Remus greeted. “I am your tour guide: Sexy Sanders~. Are you ready for the greatest tour of your whole life?” Remus declared proudly.

Logan bit his lip and looked away shyly. “R-Remus…” Dammit! Now he was turning into a deer frozen in the headlights! “I’m flattered by your introduction, but-”

“OOOoooh! ReeRee, you sly dog! You just flustered the nerd beyond belief!” Remus reacted. “Perhaps the ninja star and the loss of your buck teeth has left poor Logey in a confused state of ecstacy!” Remus teased, letting out a sexy cat growl.

Logan cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses. “Excuse me…” Logan started to turn around while he tried to ramble out an excuse. “I suppose now may not be the time to talk, so I’m gonna leave you to your duties and-”

Remus slammed something against the wall beside the door. Logan jumped at the bang sound it made, and turned to look at the blurry thing that had made the sound beside him.

It was a foot? A high heeled foot, to be exact. And...Oh geez Remus was wearing kinky boots. “Come here darling…” Remus put his foot down and led Logan to the bed. “Let me get you something somewhat edible to eat and drink.” Remus offered. “You seem in great dire need of it, after all~”

Remus sat Logan down on his bedside and opened a bottom drawer that was split into 2 spots and filled with snacks. On the left side was ‘Remus’ based snacky foods and on the right, was normal snacky foods that he guessed could be for Roman or Janus. “Pick your poison.” Remus told him.

Logan bit his lip and smiled slightly. “Is any of it actually poisoned? Or is that just you using a phrase?” Logan asked.

Remus giggled. “It’s just a saying, li’l sweetberry.” Remus replied.

Logan awkwardly reached down and grabbed a pack of swedish berries. “Thank you, Remus.”

“No problem. Now: What does the poor distressed brainiac need from your pal?” Remus asked.

Logan bit his lip and swallowed. “Well…I’ll start with this:” Logan took a breath and began. “I took some time finding out who exactly to talk to about my personal issue. My other choice would’ve been Patton, but...He’s busy with your brother.” Logan admitted.

“Oh Patton...The poor boy is busy trying to keep the peace while Roman loses his sanity because his biased beliefs and nasty habits are finally being seen as rude!” Remus added.

Logan widened his eyes and looked at Remus. “Yes! That’s exactly it!” Logan reacted.

Remus scoffed and looked at his nails. “He’s always been like that. I’m not even gonna start with all the insults he’s thrown at me.” Remus added. “Though I don’t mind some angst in my life...Roman has genuinely hurt me before.” Remus admitted.

Logan looked down a little. “I’m...I’m sorry to hear that.” Logan told him.

Remus quickly waved it off and readjusted his position. “It’s fine! Now: What is this seeecretive thing you worked sooo hard to talk about?” Remus asked.

Logan calmed down slightly and continued. “I have felt rather embarrassed and...unreliable to Thomas because of some interests I’ve had.” Logan admitted.

Remus gasped and leaned his chin on his hand. “Do tell! I do love a good ‘life-altering’ hobby.” Remus told him with a wink.

Logan rolled his eyes and couldn’t help but grow a little soft towards Remus. “Ohokay. Well...Because of my outward presentation, I am unable to present many mannerisms without fearing I’ll be judged by some of the sides.” Logan admitted. “And...there’s one specific activity that I have ached for…for a while now...” Logan admitted.

Remus giggled. “Does someone have a thing for bonds?” Remus teased.

Logan blinked and looked at him with a confused face. “I- no. Not bondage.” Logan replied.

Remus raised his eyebrows. “Roleplay?” Remus asked, now guessing.

Logan visibly cringed. “No…”

“Hmmm…” Remus bounced his eyebrows and licked his lips. “Sexting?” Remus asked.

Logan looked quite bothered. “It...It’s not a fetish, Remus!” Logan finally told him, feeling dirty for saying the word out loud.

Remus’s smile dropped. “Oh…” Remus thought for a moment. “Do you have a thing for furries?” Remus asked.

Logan shook his head. “No.”

“Is this more wholesome than I think?” Remus asked.

Logan looked at Remus with an embarrassed smile. “Y-yeah.”

“Hmm...Cuddles? Are you lacking a few good cuddles?” Remus asked.

Logan widened his eyes as his cheeks started to glow a dark red. “I...Kinda…” Logan replied.

Remus picked up Logan immediately and gently threw him onto the bed. “Tally HOO!” Remus shouted as Logan landed on the bed. Remus jumped onto the bed beside Logan, and wrapped his arms around him. “Is this what you wanted?” Remus asked.

Logan had frozen in place, unsure of how to react. This was kind of what he wanted, but...there was something missing…

Logan wrapped his arms around Remus as well and soon rested his head against his chest. “Y-Yeah...This is what I wanted…” Logan somewhat admitted.

Remus tilted his head and looked at him. “Stop the music:” Remus said to the quiet room. Remus pointed at Logan. “You’re hesitating...I can hear it.” Remus told him.

Logan widened his eyes. “Am I?” He asked.

Remus nodded. “I can tell you want something else.” Remus told him.

Logan looked down with a wobbly smile and blushed. “Yyyyy...Yeah you got me.”

“So: Any hints?” Remus asked.

Logan squeezed his eyes shut, and carefully gave Remus a really light squeeze on the side. Remus jumped slightly, but gasped as he immediately caught on.

While Logan opened his eyes with worry in his eyes, Remus smirked and gave the back of Logan’s neck a little tickle. “I think I understand what you want~”

Logan threw his head back and squeaked, not expecting it. He instinctually reached his arm back to grab the hand.

But Remus giggled and wiggled his fingers. “You shouldn’t have done thaaat~” Remus touched down on Logan’s now-exposed armpit and skittered wildly while making teasy ticky-ticky sounds. Logan quickly threw his arm down and let out his first snort. “Awwww! I think this IS what the distressed brainiac yearned for! Am I right? Am I right??!” Remus teased as he squeezed his hip with his other free hand.

Logan’s eyes grew to the size of dinner plates as he let out a big, overwhelmed yelp. “REMUHUHUS-” Logan started wiggling and squirming while cackling somewhat quietly with his face all squished.

Remus had a stupidly happy grin on his face as he kept going. “The smartest being in Thomas’s entire mind palace is ticklish! And he LIKES it!” Remus reacted. “This is like landing in heaven! For Logan AND myself!” Remus reacted.

Logan covered his face with his hands and whined. “Yohohohou lihihike ihihit toohohohoho?” Logan asked.

As a reply, Remus leaned in and blew a raspberry on his neck. Logan squealed like he had never squealed before, and hid his flustered face in Remus’s chest. “There’s my answer!” Remus declared.

Logan tried to mutter something to Remus, but his face was intentionally being shoved into Remus’s chest. Remus bursted out laughing at how muffled and wonky Logan’s ‘words’ sounded in his chest. “You sound like you’re stuck in a door or something! Do I need to tickle you out of your crampy situation?!” Remus asked him jokingly.

Logan giggled more into the Duke’s chest. Remus’s teasing was starting to fluster him more, and the anticipation was only adding to it. Remus was surprisingly good at this! Logan was thrown out of his moment of thought from two ticklish squeezes against his hips. “BAHAHAHA- REHEHEHE WAHAHAHAHAIT!” Logan yelled at him.

“Wait? But why? You’re already enjoying it! Why would I wait for something to happen, when everything I want is happening right now?” Remus asked rhetorically.

“IHIHIT’SSSS-SSSOHOHOHOHO TIHIHICKLIHIHIHIHISH!” Logan yelled back at him.

“I know! But isn’t that the best part? You’re getting the tickle tickle tickles you’ve been craving for…” Remus paused and thought for a moment. “Wait...How long have you been wanting these tickles for again?”

Logan snorted as his hair grew more and more messy. “UHUHUHUHUHUHH...MOHOHONTHSSSS?” Logan guessed.

“MONTHS?! Seriously?! You’ve been tickle-deprived for MONTHS?!” Remus shouted. “How in Satan’s butthole did you manage to survive months without being tickled?!” Remus reacted.

“PERHRHRSIHIHISTENENENCE!” Logan yelled back.

“Okay, maybe. But persisting without tickles and cuddles for MONTHS?! That’s like living an entire week without my favorite deodorant in the house! I’d die of starvation! And my tongue would be drier than Gluten Free bread!” Remus reacted further.

Logan laughed more at Remus’s statement. Of course Remus would starve himself if he had to live without deodorant! It only makes sense if you properly know the guy. Logan also visibly cringed at the thought of deodorant ‘moisturizing’ the tongue. The image in his head was making his tongue feel all weird and chalky.

...And surprisingly, Remus had a point. Gluten Free bread is ridiculously dry…

Remus soon gave Logan a bit of a break and spun his mustache while he watched the nerd. Logan took the moment to breathe again, but looked visibly disappointed that Remus had stopped.

Remus frowned softly with a wobbly smile at Logan’s reaction. Then, Remus made the one sound Logan NEVER imagined hearing from him: he cooed!

“Awwwww!” Remus covered his mouth and nose with his hands. “God, it’s like trying to ignore a homeless puppy! Now I know how Patton feels 60% of the time!” Remus reacted.

Logan chuckled at the last statement. Patton really does act like that a majority of the time.

Remus wrapped his arms around Logan and hugged him tightly. “I’m so happy you told me!” He admitted. “You have no clue how happy you made me feel the moment you came to my door!”

Logan relaxed a little more and hugged him back nicely. “...Really? You’re happy I told you?”

Remus nodded. “Well of course! No one besides Janus and Roman have ever told me their deepest secrets before!” Remus admitted. “And...Your secret is super wholesome.”

Logan’s smile dropped slightly as another thought went through his head. “Hey Remus…”

Remus tilted his head. “Yes Logan?”

Logan calmly stared into Remus’s eyes. “Do you still think I’m logical and reliable? Even with my...tickling interest?” Logan asked.

Remus smiled softly and placed his hands on Logan’s shoulders. “You are the most logical and sane side we have in the mind palace. No amount of feelings is ever gonna change your big IQ.” Remus reminded him.

Logan smiled and went back into the hug. Feeling safe and secure in his arms, Logan closed his eyes and rested his chin on Remus’s shoulder.

“I guarantee if you were to tell Patton or even Roman, you would be given what you want.” Remus told him. “Roman is a bit more risky. He might look at you like you have 3 heads at first. But Roman will wind up going ballistic about how cute you are.” Remus told him. “He’s done the same thing for me.” Remus told him.

Logan looked at him. “Really?” Logan smirked a little. “What’s your cute hobby?” he asked.

Remus smiled and pointed to his closet. “Making stuffed animal abominations.” Remus replied proudly.

Logan tilted his head. “I...don’t think I follow.”

Remus giggled and blew a raspberry onto Logan’s neck again. “It doesn’t take much to follow what I mean.” Remus teased.

Logan squealed and cowered into Remus’s chest again while Remus began to explain: “I make stuffed abominations out of many different stuffed animals! I switch out the limbs, I add stuffed wings, tails or tentacles to the stuffies, and they become my pile of monstrosities!” Remus explained.

“Sohoho you’re sid from Toy Story?” Logan asked.

Remus smirked and tickled his sides as a response. “Exactly! See? You get it.”

Logan snorted and tried to scoot himself back. But Remus managed to grab his arm, hold it up, and attacked his exposed armpit. “Nice try, Ms. Berry blue!”

Logan shook his head wildly and let out every bit of laughter he had. He was a wiggling mess of laughs, giggles and snorts all in one nerd. It was so cute to see!

“C-COHOHOME OHOHOHON, REHEHEHEHE!” Logan yelled to him.

“Is that a challenge?” Remus asked him. “Are you telling me I’m not tickling you enough?! The nerve!” the Duke teased.

Logan squealed and pulled his knees to his chest. “NOHOHOHO, IHIHI DIHIHIHIDN’T!”

“But it sounds like you did! What on earth could you possibly mean when you say ‘come on, Ree’?” Remus asked.

“IHIHI MEHEHEHEANT YOHOHOHOU’RE TEHEHEHEASIHIHIHING MEHEHE AHA LOHOHOHOT!” Logan admitted.

Remus giggled. “I know.”

Remus stopped tickling him for a moment and placed the nerd’s hand down. Next, Remus grabbed onto Logan’s tie and started loosening it. “Here: I don’t want your trusty tie to choke you while I tickle you.” Remus told him.

If Logan wasn’t blushing before, he was CERTAINLY blushing now! Remus actually unfolded Logan’s collar and removed the tie with genuine care presented in his actions. Logan had frozen in place, which ended up helping Remus remove the tie with little struggle.

Then, Remus put the tie around Logan’s right wrist and tightened it to a comfortable amount. “Check it out!” Remus lifted the tie up and started tickling Logan’s armpit again. Logan snorted and immediately burst into giggles while he tried to cover his armpit. But the tie was working like a bonding rope and preventing his arm from covering the spot properly! But Logan also noticed Remus had left the tie a bit looser. So with some tugging and twisting, the wrist could easily pop right out.

Much to Remus’s surprise though, Logan tried not to pull too hard on his wrist. He was actually letting his hand be bonded for a bit.

Remus happily smiled as he covered Logan’s body with all the tickles and laughter. This was so fun! And to think that just 25 minutes ago, Logan was a tense and illogical mess. He’d never seen Logan behave like that before. He’d seen the nerd annoyed, hurt, excited and in shock, but he’s never seen Logan anxious. It was quite unusual for the logical side. But now Logan was a giggling, blushing mess of emotions. It was brand new for Remus, and most likely quite brand new for Logan as well. But Logan seemed to be enjoying it.

Finally after a while of tickling, Logan decided he had reached his limit. He pulled his hand out of the tie, and curled up into a sideways ball. “Ohohokahahahay, thahahahat’s ehehenoho-” Remus had already stopped the moment Logan said ‘Okay’. He must’ve already known Logan would want him to stop. So, he did.

Logan looked at Remus with a glow of happiness in his eyes. “Thank you Remus. That helped a lot.” Logan told him.

Remus smiled back and gently punched his shoulder. “Eeh, it’s nothing. I’ll happily do it again anytime you need me to.” Remus told him.

Logan blushed a little at that and looked away awkwardly. “I’ll...I’ll keep that in mind.”

Remus got off the bed, walked over to the dresser and opened the middle drawer. Hidden within some magazines and spare sewing fabric, Remus grabbed a water bottle and wrote an L on the lid. He closed the drawer and handed it over to Logan. “Here you go. I don’t want you die-drating on my watch.” Remus told him.

Logan laughed a little at that and drank some of the water from the water bottle.

“Now: Either you can get the hell out before anyone notices the nerd’s hanging out with the crook, or you can stay and get hit with all the questions later.” Remus explained.

Logan choked on his water and put the lid back on as he coughed the drop of water out of his air pipe. “Ihi-” He cleared his throat. “A crook is a dishonest person, or a thief. You may be a bit of a Grinch, but you’re most certainly not a crook.” Logan admitted.

Remus looked at him with surprise. “Wait, really?”

“Really.” Logan put his water bottle down. “You are the most honest person we have in the mind palace. Though the honesty does cross the line to brutal sometimes, it still shows the lengths you’ll go to be truthful.” Logan explained briefly. “Besides: I think I’ll risk the countless questions and stay a while longer.”

Remus smile grew into a big toothy grin as he held his own chest. “Awwww!” Then Remus shoved his hand into his own chest and ripped his heart out, blood vessels and all. “Look! You made my heart jump!” Remus reacted as he pointed to it. Sure enough, his human heart had visibly jumped a few times in front of Logan.

Logan covered the lower half of his face and couldn’t help the laugh that left his mouth. Looks like Logan will have to add the word ‘random’ to the list of Remus’s personality traits.

I'm finally back. I took nearly 3 weeks off of writing because I hit a major writers block. I am happy to say I got other things done in that time, and I used the unexpected break to my advantage. So now: I'm back and hopefully back to stay for a while.

[thoughtsaboutshows]

21. Touch Football

this took forever but here we are! Set in a post part 4 world where no one dies. Sabrina was in Heaven in the halls of Baxter High.  Or at least the version of it that was actually good.  Nick’s arm was draped around her shoulder and holding her hand in his, brushing her knuckles as she enthusiastically explained how the week was going to go.  Her own hand was tucked into his back pocket and she was replaying the growl he’d let out in her head when she slipped it into his jeans.  He was wearing his letterman jacket and she was in her cheerleading uniform and without even trying the two walked as if they owned the school.  All eyes were on them, a couple that looked that good were going to draw the attention, but Nick’s entire self was captured by Sabrina.  And well, she was paying no mind to the rest of the school.  She was full to the brim with joy, and this Heaven was nothing like the Sweet Hereafter she’d spent a week in after she’d died draining the void.

Nick was over the moon as well, with his girl tucked close to him as her lavender lotion invaded his senses.  This is what he had envisioned when he showed up at Sabrina’s co- president meet and greet, the two of them together walking close.  It was only out matched by the moment Sabrina had shown up in the Academy’s library, hand in hand with Hecate, cheeks flushed and alive.  He’d almost tripped over the table leg running to her.  He didn’t care if she was a ghost or a dream, he just wanted to be near her, look at her, see the golden specks in her brown eyes.  But when he touched her face it was warm and the fingertips that she rubbed up and down his chest sent real goosebumps rushing across his skin.  He felt those same goosebumps now, with her hand in his back pocket and a laugh that was more like sweet honey than anything else.

“And Wednesday is jocks and nerds day.  And you’re both so that shouldn’t be too hard.”  She giggled as she nuzzled her nose into his jaw.

“Hey now!”  He mocked hurt and kissed her nose, drawing an even bigger smile from her lips.

“And then Thursday is the powder puff game.”  Sabrina nodded proudly.  She was excited for this.  It was Juniors versus Seniors and had been looking forward to it ever since she started Baxter High.  She’d missed it last year, too busy with eldritch terrors and dying to attend homecoming festivities.   But now as a senior, she was going to make it count.

“I’m sorry, the what now?”  Nick raised his eyebrows as he turned to her.  She giggled again and stopped, leaning against a wall and pulling him against her.  His hands settled on her hips as hers trailed up his chest and onto his shoulders.

“Powder Puff.  It’s a touch football game the junior and senior girls play during homecoming week.”  Sabrina smacked her lips and smiled as she smoothed her thumbs over the sinews underneath his shirt.  “What there’s nothing like that at the Academy?”

“Prudence and her sisters liked to play some crazy games.”  He joked as she rolled her eyes at him and poked him in the side.  They both chuckled as he leaned in to kiss her softly.  Sabrina and Nick had long since grown out of any insecurity about the sisters or any other aspects of their past.  Harvey and Nick even had become something like friends.  Nick and Sabrina were just grateful that they were here and alive, choosing to channel their energy into spells or the perfect way to make their bodies tick.  Rather than rehashing ghosts of choices past.  His lips were still pressed against hers as he spoke again, tasting her smile.  “I like our games much better, Spellman.  Trust me.”

She bit his lip once but then pushed him away with her gentle fingers, knowing that getting caught engaging in too much PDA could earn her detention and a one way ticket off the powder puff team.  The two could hardly be trusted once they got a taste of each other and Sabrina didn’t want to test their self-control today.  She and Nick could have their fun later.

“So you’re gonna come and cheer me on, right?”  Sabrina asked him as she grabbed his hand and returned it to its spot over her shoulder.  The look she gave him was inviting, an unspoken promise of what he’d be rewarded with if he went.  But she didn’t need to dangle the carrot in front of him, he was down and supportive of anything she wanted to do.  He’d show up regardless and well, they’d end up naked and in their bed later regardless too.

“I’ll be there, Spellman.”  He turned to kiss her forehead and she nudged his chin with her nose once before they walked into their first class.

Later that week when Sabrina was donned in her short black shorts and red t-shirt, headband firmly in place, Nick wondered why Powderpuff wasn’t a year round thing.  Somehow a masterpiece of adorable and sexy all at once, Sabrina Spellman took the field by storm.  The black shorts were a contrast to her milky skin and so different from what he normally caught her in.   He didn’t care much what she wore, she amazed him either way.   But around Nick Sabrina was wearing her classic sweatered style or nothing at all, saving the headband for last for Nick to pluck off of her.

She knew what she was doing, purposely rolling her shorts up higher and charming her t-shirt to sit just tight enough.  She winked at Nick from below on the field as Roz applied two thick, black lines on her cheeks, and bit her red lip before waving and skipping off.  Nick swallowed thickly, already thinking of all the games they could play or the football innuendos he could squeeze in later.

But to him, even sexier than she looked, was the way she was playing.  She was the strongest person he knew, and that certainly came through.  A menace on the field that Sabrina Spellman, she managed to pay both offense and defense, scoring the seniors enough points where the refs didn’t even have to rig the game for the seniors to win.  Nick knew well that Sabrina was energetic, dedicated, and can definitely hold her own when it came to being physical.  But she took it to a whole new level and made that game her bitch.  And frankly, while Nick still didn’t fully understand football, he understood one thing: Sabrina Spellman drove him absolutely wild.  He was turned on, and he wanted her.

Despite playing all game, she was all energy and smiles when she saw Nick waiting for her by the football field gate.  He was donned in his letterman jacket and when he opened it a bit it revealed a dark shirt with her face on it, making some ridiculous face from over the summer that Nick had snapped a picture of and fell in love with.  She rolled her eyes and took off running towards him, his own smile widening at her excitement.

His arms opened on instinct and she threw themselves in them, partly to cover up his shirt and partly because she could feel his desire for her all game.  It radiated off him all night, his magic mingling with hers and desperately seeking release.  She’d been feeding off of the energy, channeling it into her blocks or feet while she ran.  But now it was itching at her skin, seeking out what it has wanted all along.  Who she’d wanted all along.

He sunk into her kiss immediately when she finally did kiss him, and one hand trailed into her hair while the other pulled her around the waist to keep her to him.  They could both feel it now, that crackle underneath every party of them, humming in anticipation at being reunited.

“Good game, babe.”  Nick groaned when she pulled away and slowly slid down his body to her own feet, purposely taking her time when ber hips brushed against his.

“Did you like it?”  She asked him with a head cocked to the side as she reached out and brushed a curl out of his face.  Her hand trailed down his chest as she picked at the shirt and shook her head.  With a smirk he brushed her chin up to look at him.

“I loved it.  As for this shirt, well I did say I would cheer for you.  And I thoroughly watched you score over and over.”  He brushed her hair back now and she shivered at how dark his eyes had gotten.  “Think you’ll score again?”  He wasn’t talking about the game.

“I don’t know, you might though.”  She narrowed her eyes suggestively and he tugged her closer.  “If you play the game right.”

“I always take you all the way.”  He kissed her so gently it tingled.   Neither of them cared that there were people around them still.  “What do they call it, babe?”  He asked her with his mouth a breath away from her ear.  “A touch down?  I know you love a good touch, especially down.”

Sabrina swallowed thickly, nearly choking on the desire for him and the magic rushing through her seeking out the connection it only found with Nick.  She grabbed his hand and pulled him behind a shed, kissing him wildly and hungerly grabbing at his hands and placing them where she wanted them on her body.

“Take me home, Nick.”  She nearly demanded and he gave a biting chuckle against her lips before teleporting them back to what had quickly become their room at the Mortuary.

They both got their chances to tear off the other’s t-shirt, not wasting anymore time or energy on anything else.

[caprice-nisei-enjoyer]

Questionable Content characters as best as I can remember em

For @rustingbridges even though they didn't ask

Marten - Original protagonist. Local hipster, music nerd, coffee drinker. His social and romantic sagas were the core of the story for several years. Works at the university library. Dating Claire.

Pintsize - Marten's wacky robot roommate. Loves gross stuff and inappropriate sexual comments despite being the size of a medium dog and made only of ovals and rectangles.

Faye - An outgoing, no-nonsense southern girl Marten met in a bar. Now his roommate. Became the secondary romantic lead as the series evolved. Had a will-they-won't-they dynamic with Marten, then dated Angus, now dating Bubbles. Used to work at Coffee of Doom, recently opened a repair shop for robots.

Dora - Owner of Coffee of Doom, a local hipster haunt. Proudly goth. Dated Marten for a while but now engaged to Tai.

Steve - Marten's best friend and longtime roommate. Less anxious than most of the rest of the cast. Moved out and was forgotten for several years; turns out he joined the CIA and worked as an international spy/hitman/man of mystery.

Natalya? Natasha? - Steve's hot Russian spy girlfriend who proves that all that spy stuff was real, you guys!

Sven - Dora's brother and local man-slut. Absurdly successful career writing awful country music. He and Faye were entangled briefly, which caused him to decide to be less slutty.

Marten's landlord - This guy showed up for like one strip, right?

Hannelore - Local manic blonde with severe OCD. Barista at Coffee of Doom. She's fabulously wealthy but lives in Marten's apartment building. Born in space, circumnavigated the world as exposure therapy to help her OCD. Able to infuse her love and support for her friends into the tea she brews.

Winslow - Hannelore's AI roommate. Anxious, sweet, looks like an iPod with arms and legs.

Hannelore's dad - Eccentric rich genius, and pioneer of AI tech. Lives on a space station with a crew of scientists (human and AI).

Station - The sentient space station AI. Has a crush on Hannelore, who he helped raise as a child. I guess it's similar to them being childhood friends?

Hannelore's mom - Corporate tycoon. Fabulously successful due to monetization of Hannelore's dad's work and her ruthless approach to business.

Penelope - Former barista at Coffee of Doom. Dating Will. Blonde, but not Pizza Girl.

Pizza Girl - Local food-themed superheroine. Blonde. Bears a striking resemblance to Penelope.

Will - Local fancy man, hipster, and bartender at [hipster bar with funny name]. Looks great in formal wear with a monocole. Dating Penelope.

Tai - Local librarian at the university library. Marten's boss. Proud lesbian. Once brought Marten to support her in impulsively getting her clit pierced. Engaged to Dora.

Emily - Local engineering(?) student. Wacky genius who often gets lost in her own world. Voted "most likely to either save the world or end it in the next decade" by the UN Security Council. Barista at Coffee of Doom.

Claire - Local undergrad in library science(?). Currently looking at grad schools. Trans. Family trait of bright red hair. Dating Marten.

Marten's mom - A dominatrix and former porn star. Dating Sam's dad.

Sam - Local rambunctious youth. Maybe 10-12? Runs a side hustle selling "sprays" (doodles in permanent marker) to AIs who visit Faye and Bubbles' store. This is their primary source of revenue and advertising.

Sam's Dad - ??? I don't remember shit about him.

Roko - Former cop AI turned nonprofit worker. Bread fetishist; major customer of The Secret Bakery. Do Not Speak Her Full Name.

Yay - Pan-gender pan-incarnate pan-galactic AI collective(?). A rogue AI with the skills to hack the world but the inclination to annoy people and pet cats. Non-binary icon. Roko's roommate.

Millefeuille - Roko's boss at the AI rights nonprofit. Lovably incompetent. Has a crush on Emily.

Bubbles - Retired military android. Shy, but deeply loyal. Big lady. Engaged to Faye and a partner in the repair shop.

Punchbot - Faye and Bubbles' best customer. Loves punching, even if it's happening to him.

Eliot - Large anxious boi. Baker at The Secret Bakery, bouncer at [hipster bar with funny name]. Dating (?) Clinton.

Clinton - Claire's brother. Also a redhead. I have no idea what he does for a living. AI / human relations enthusiast (but not in a sexy way). Has a robot hand. Dating (?) Eliot.

Aurelia - Claire and Clinton's mom. A bit of an empty nester, recently adopted a stray dog named Cosmo and started streaming video games on Twitch. Furry anime avatar to match her screen name, MommyMilkers420. 200k followers.

The Turkeys - Profane wild fowl. They show up every Thanksgiving.