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imagine-darksiders · 4 years

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Cold Hands, Warm Heart

Chapter 11 - What are friends for?

AAAAT LAAAAAASSTTT! I am so sorry it’s taken like, half a year but life has been getting in the way a bit. I’m really going to try and be a bigger presence on this site from now on. x

Shit’s been so freaking terrible and depressing lately but hopefully this will cheer at least some people up and it’s the longest chapter by FAR. So, distract yourself for a while <3

Words: 18,204

Tags: Panic attack, anxiety, bruises, hurt/comfort, found family, the power of friendship™, subtle flirting with a giant woman ;), fluff, hugs, angst. OMG the angst.

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There's an undeniable air of unease cloaking the village of Tri Stone as Eideard trundles up the steps to Muria's garden - one, wrinkled hand tugging mercilessly on a beard that has been subjected to the rough treatment since Death had returned several hours earlier.

Any elation at seeing the Tears flow through their home for the first time in years evaporated when the makers saw what state the old Horseman was in. Eyes wilder than a hurricane, the rippling muscles of his shoulders pulled taut enough to snap with just a little more pressure, he'd strode rigidly down into the village and the air behind him seemed to waver in the heat of his molten rage.

And then, hushed uncertainty shifted into horror upon seeing the tiny, limp figure he had cradled against his chest.

Eideard met him first at the centre of the bridge, a hundred questions ready to fall off his tongue, only to be abandonned as Death passed you wordlessly into the maker's hands, exerting a degree of care that took the Old one by surprise.

Then, quite abruptly, he turned on his heel and stalked back the way he'd come, leaving behind no further an explanation than a single word hissed like poison between gritted teeth.

'Karkinos.'

And just like that, he was gone, back up the stairs and out through Tri-Stone's boundary, doubtless aiming to work off some of the rage he'd carried in with him by massacring a dozen or so constructs unfortunate enough to cross his warpath.

Meanwhile, Eideard was left with an armful of unconscious human and a mob of his fellow makers converging on him and demanding to know what had happened, a question he only wished he knew the answer to himself.

A bloody nose and shallow breaths were hardly good news, but at least the Horseman hadn't handed him a corpse. After futiley trying to calm the others down and assure them that, yes, the human is still alive, Eideard's elbow was caught by Muria and together, they made off for her garden where they laid you down on a trim of soft leather and then, the shaman set to work.

Half a day later and you have yet to come around.

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“How is she?”

Muria glances up from crushing another herb into a glass vial, her lips stretching to send a humourless smile towards the sound of Eideard's voice as he steps inside her garden for the fourth time in as many hours.

“No broken bones,” she informs him, pinching the vial's neck and swirling it in delicate circles to mix the potion that sloshes within, “Which, in itself, is a miracle, I do not mind telling you.”

Eideard nods sagely. “Aye, that she survived an encounter with Karkinos at all is cause for wonder.”

“Oh, naturally.” Lowering her voice, Muria inclines her head to a part of the gazebo behind her. “But I was actually referring to the fact that she hasn't been broken by our youngling yet.”

At that, one of Eideard's feathery eyebrows slides up his forehead, perplexed by her statement for a moment, at least until she steps aside.

Had the last few hours not drained him of all good humour, the elder would have let out a soft laugh at the sight before him. “Ah,” is what he utters instead.

Karn, having snuck into the gazebo only minutes after you were brought there, has settled himself right on the garden's rear flowerbed and it seems that at some point during his fretful vigil, he's managed to doze off, hunched over with his chin tucked up against his chest, And there, nestled in the young maker's arms, almost lost behind the swell of his biceps, lays a very tiny, very fortunate human. Fortunate to be alive, that is.

Sparing a second to throw Muria a bemused glance, Eideard steps up to the youngling and places a hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle shake.

Despite a lifetime's worth of well accrued wisdom, the Old One still isn't prepared for the reaction he receives. His hand is knocked violently away as Karn's eyes snap open and his elbow flies up out of nowhere, lips peeled back into a snarl. Momentarily stunned, the old maker braces himself against his staff whilst the youngling curls an arm around your body, his fingers splayed out and hooked over to resemble thick-set, meaty claws.

Although aware that he's probably supposed to be intimidated by this display, Eideard's main concern is for the injured human who is now tucked securely beneath a heaving chest, Karn's grip on you tight enough that his knuckles begin turning white.

Eideard can't remember ever having seen him so defensive before.

“Steady Karn,” he says, an authoritative edge to his tone, “Jostle her too much, and you'll undo all of our hard work.”

At the sound of his Elder's voice, the fog lifts from Karn's mind and he blinks, eyes coming into focus on a familiar, white beard. In a flash, the youngling's fierce expression is wiped away and a dark flush blooms across his cheeks in its place. “E-Eideard!” he sputters, “Sorry! Didn't mean to nod off!”

“I imagine you didn't,” The Old one replies evenly, “Just as I'm sure you're not meaning to smother our young friend here.”

“Whu-” Karn's face scrunches up, baffled until he looks down and realises that one of his ungloved palms is cupped around your fragile, little back, crushing you securely against the coarse fabric of his tunic. All at once, the colour drains from him like water from a leaky barrel.

“Oh, Stone!” he curses and rips you away from his chest, wincing at the way your head flops around against his fingertips. After scrutinising your face for any inkling that you're in pain but finding no change, he lifts his head up to stare beseechingly at Eideard, his features contorted by anguish and desperation. “Did I...Did I hurt her?” he croaks.

Eideard's face softens and he lays a reassuring hand on the young maker's shoulder. “I'm sure she'll be alright,” he says lightly, “If she can survive a run in with Karkinos, she can survive being squashed by a heavy-handed pup.” His effort to cheer Karn up is met with a half-hearted smile that soon disappears as swiftly as it had come. Shifting his gaze back down to you, Karn sighs and raises a single digit to brush tenderly along your jawline, his brows gradually creeping closer and closer together. “Eideard?”

“Mm?”

There's a long pause. Then, “Why hasn't she woken up yet?”

Mulling over an answer that'll ease the youngling's nerve, the village elder opens his mouth to respond but finds himself beaten to the chase by Muria. “I imagine because she so desperately needs this long rest,” the shaman explains, sweeping around Eideard and coming to a stop once she senses Karn directly ahead of her. There, the maker sinks to her knees until she's level with his hands and offers him a patient smile. “Give her time, Karn. Her body is far more fragile than yours or mine. I've done all I can . Eideard's magic stitched the cracks in her bones and the poultices I've applied will keep the pain at bay. Speaking of which...” Trailing off, Muria produces a strip of cloth, suspiciously similar in colour and texture to the hem of her sleeve, and holds it over the opening of the potion she'd been mixing. Then, after tipping the contents upside down to soak the rag, she motions for Karn to lift your jumper.

They've been through this routine a lot over the last few hours, yet Karn's breath still hitches every time his thumb peels back your clothes and reveals the soft expanse of your midriff. Although the sight of your exposed skin admittedly sets his heart racing, it's the bruise staining your left side a livid purple from hip to sternum that causes it to stop beating in its tracks. Each time he sees the injury, he can't stop himself from imagining the pain you must have been in and he has to avert his gaze, ashamed that he could have been there to protect you, yet he wasn't. Because he was afraid. Afraid of messing up again as he had with Alya and Valus, almost costing them their lives.

Swallowing, Karn stares at a spot far off in the distance, his thumb still holding your jumper out of the way as Muria blots gently at your injured side.

After another minute of the quiet ministrations, she pulls away and rises to her feet. “There, that should suffice, I think. There's no way to tell for certain until she wakes up, but it might at least help.”

“Knowing you, I'm confident it will,” Eideard tells her.

The shaman smiles warmly but waves his compliment aside. “As I said, we shall simply have to wait and see. Now...” Pausing to fasten the vial back on her belt, she asks, “...Tell me, is Valus looking this way?”

“Is-?” Baffled, Eideard glances across the courtyard to Alya's forge and finds that – yes - the forge brother has indeed put his work on standby to stare towards the garden, though once he sees he's been spotted, he recoils, jerking his head away and lumbering as inconspicuously as possibly to a cooling barrel that stands in the corner of their forge.

The old maker chuckles at the display and returns his attention to Muria. “Yes, as a matter of fact, he is. How did you guess?”

“Valus - for all his stolidity - is a notorious worrier, try as he might to hide it.” A resigned sigh slips from her and she takes up her staff, turning to the steps with a flourish of blue robes. “Well, I suppose I'd better go and let them know there's been no change over here.” Waving a brief farewell, the shaman lifts the hem of her skirts and, swinging the staff out in front, makes her way down the stone staircase, leaving the eldest and youngest makers to occupy themselves in her garden.

Eideard watches her leave for a moment longer before he turns back to Karn, who's attention has once more been claimed wholly by the human in his arms.

Something in the Elder thrums at the sight, a stirring, a memory, pushing to the surface until it breaks through and spills over into his mind's eye. Slowly, one corner of his mouth stretches into a sad smile.

He remembers a time when he himself was young and earnest, so long ago now that the surrounding mountains were almost half their height and the stars he knew had come and gone. His eyes were once as full of devotion as Karn's are now, gazing into the face of a friend.

Traipsing up to the youngling's side, Eideard grunts and leans himself back against the low wall, throwing a sideways glance at his companion, who hasn't taken his eyes off you at all.

Seconds trickle by slowly and a gust of wind drifts through Tri Stone, rustling the plants and herbs that Muria had proudly raised from the dirt. Eideard's eyes slip closed and he languidly raises his head to meet the breeze, enjoying the feel of it carding through his heavy beard. For one who considers his words diplomatically before he voices them, he barely thinks too hard on the next ones that flow out of his mouth. “You're fond of her.” The Old one really did try to make it sound like a curious inquiry rather than a stated fact he already knows to be absolute. Still, it's too late now. The wind has already carried his words too far for him to retreive.

Oddly enough though, Karn remains uncharacteristically quiet for some time, so long, in fact, that Eideard is just about to open his mouth and repeat himself when the youngling at last murmurs something, softer than he's ever heard it. “She's nice to me.”

The old maker blinks.

Dragging his eyes off your face to peer up at his elder, Karn adds, “She laughs at my jokes. She called me amazing! No one's ever said that to me before. And....she never tells me to stop talkin'. I – I know she ain't been here long enough to be sick of me yet -” he blurts hastily, and before Eideard can reassure him that nobody is 'sick' of him, he presses on, “- but it means a lot.”

“I understand, lad,” the Old One reassures him, noting that the young maker's voice has shot up the same way it always does when he's getting defensive, “I'm not accusing you of fondness. In fact, I concur. There's a lot of value to be placed in creatures of a kind inclination. It's a shame more species don't see this worth.” He pauses to study your eyelids and frowns when he sees there's no movement behind them. You must be too exhausted to even dream. “A human among makers....It is astonishing, really. To think, in a mere matter of moments, she's managaed to endear herself to most, if not all of us here. I shall certainly miss her company when she leaves.”

At his side, Karn stiffens. “If she leaves.”

“Karn...” Eideard swivels himself around to properly face the youngling and stands there with his lips slightly parted, caught in the vestiges of a response. He thinks for a moment, sucks in a breath and releases it slowly, body sagging as his mighty lungs deflate. “...You know you can't-”

“There're so many things I can't wait to show her!” Karn suddenly exclaims as if he'd known the Old one was trying to tell him something he doesn't want to hear, “Soon as she's better, o' course.”

“Please, listen to-”

“I bet she'd like to see that old construct out in the fjord, now Death's cleared that area up.”

“Karn!-” Eideard tries again, only to be talked over once more.

“A-and she hasn't even seen my hut yet! You know, she really liked my journeyman dish. I've got to show her some of my newer-”

“KARN!”

Like a clap of thunder, the Old one's voice explodes across Tri Stone and sends several birds squawking into the air from a nearby tree. Karn flinches at the sound of it, jamming his mouth shut. Once the last echo fades on the wind, the village is plunged into a terse silence.

Eideard - patient and soft-spoken as a mountain brook - never raises his voice, hates doing so in fact, unless absolutely necessary.

Hearing such a loud noise emit from the Old one's mouth is enough of a sign to Karn that he'd pushed his luck just a stone too far. Slouching, he sinks in on himself and gazes down at your restful face, his jawline set stubbornly so it doesn't quiver when Eideard gently tells him, “You can't keep her, Lad.”

Crestfallen, the young maker continues to observe you, his pale eyes sweeping from the delicate hands resting on your stomach to the soft hair that caresses his fingertip. “But -” He swallows thickly and can't help but feel childish as he croaks out, “- but she's my friend!”

It's in that one, small comment that Eideard recalls just how much younger Karn is than all of the other makers.

Breathing out a sigh only the world-weariest can produce, the elder begins to reply but all of a sudden finds himself interrupted yet again. This time however, it isn't by Karn.

Both makers give a start when the human amongst them lets out a series of wheezing coughs, convulsing abruptly in Karn's hand before falling still. The young maker holds his breath, ears flicking up an inch or two and he waits, hoping, willing his friend to come around.

-----------------------------------------------

There's no doubt about it.

You're getting fairly sick of waking up with absolutely no idea where you are.

And that dull but irksome ache in your side is not instilling much confidence in your drowzy mind.

Something is nagging at you, something important and wrong, although you can't even summon the willpower to try and think what it might be. Whatever it is promptly fades into the background as you become aware of a noise buzzing from a spot above your head and echoing down through your whole body, pulling you further out of the realm of sleep.

God, your side really doesn't feel right.

Soon, the buzzing is joined by a low warble and as your brain kicks into gear, you finally recognise that what you're hearing are voices. Their presence helps to chase away the last vestiges of sleep and a strong scent of leather saturates the air in your nostrils, becoming stronger with every inhale until, with herculean effort, you finally pry your eyelids apart.

To begin with, you can't even make out what you're squinting up at. There's only a large, blurry mass of shapes that shift and bulge and block out the meagre light trying to shine out from behind them. It's only after you do a few more, droopy blinks that anything starts to make sense.

A flash of white teeth, the twitching muscles of a broad, blockish nose and eyes grey as a morning mist.... 'That's a face', your brain helpfully supplies.

An enormous face, looming over you and filling your whole field of vision. Not the most concerting thing to wake up to unprepared.

Jumping out of your skin, your eyes widen and you let out a gasp, arms raising instinctively to protect your head.

“Ey! Yer alright, s'just me, Karn!”

Your lips part and you attempt to speak but all that comes out is a wheeze and you have to swallow several times before you feel prepared to try again. “K...Karn?”

The face above you pulls away a little to nod and when you see the features brighten, you can immediately tell who it is. A gushing sigh flows out of you and you allow an arm to slap heavily across your eyes. “Hey, big fella.”

Relief strikes the maker like a tidal wave, sweeping away the previous hours of anxious trepidation. Shoulders slumping, he takes a second to thank the StoneFather before breathing a sigh that ruffles your hair. “Hey,” he returns, a soft grin quirking at his mouth.

Sagging even further in the warm skin at your back, you begin to scrub groggily at your face, a low groan bubbling to the surface. “Ugh, where am I?”

“You are safe, in Tri Stone,” a new voice thrums from your side and you manage to roll your head over to catch a glimpse of a familiar white beard and wize, ancient eyes.

“Eideard,” you breathe languidly, trying to return the smile he's giving you.

There's an aura the Old Maker exudes simply by existing in close proximity that lessens the uncomfortable squirm of fear in your gut. You're glad he's here.

All too soon though, the smile crawls off his face and a crevass appears between his eyebrows instead, so deep it makes his other bags and wrinkles seem shallow in comparison. “Does anything hurt?” he asks.

On a reflex learned through years of playing down the severity of a situation, you shake your head, avert your gaze and answer with a subdued, “I'm fine.”

Somehow, Eideard's face grows even more stern. “I would prefer,” he rumbles, disapproval dripping from his tongue, “that you don't lie just to spare me from concern. I need to know if you're in pain.”

Suddenly very sheepish, you turn your head to look at Karn and find him already staring down at you imploringly. So, still groggy and confused, you heave a sigh and come clean. “M'not hurting that much. It's more like, I'm really, really stiff? And um, my side -” Here, you waggle your hand vaguely up and down your ribs. “- feels weird.”

Weird is admittedly an understatement. It feels as though it should hurt, but your brain isn't registering the pain properly. Just as you open your mouth to ask what's going on, Karn cuts you off. “Weird's better than hurt,” he says and glances up at the older maker, “In't it?”

“Do you remember what happened?” Eideard urges, deaf to the youngling's question.

Bits and pieces of fragmented memories dance teasingly around in your head and it takes a surprising amount of strength to reach out and snatch them up, piecing them all together as you would a jigsaw puzzle. You recall the grey stone of an ancient, crumbling temple, plants growing in through cracks in the ceiling and water – lots of it. It made sense as to why there were so many bugs zipping about -

'Wait. Bugs...?'

All of a sudden, with that one thought, your eyes fling open wide, the fog lifts and the rest of the memory hits hard enough to leave you reeling. Everything comes flooding back. From losing your temper with Death to the fight with Karkinos and -

“Oh my god, Death!?” you blurt out, shooting up in Karn's hand and almost knocking yourself out again on his chin.

“Whey! Steady now!” he frets, “must'nt try movin' yet!”

Unfortunately, you figure out just why that is a second later when your left side abruptly seizes up and you cry out as if someone had just stuck an electric prod to your ribs. Throwing an arm out, you're forced to grab onto Karn's thumb just to remain upright. Quick as a flash, the young maker shoots out his free hand to steady you, barely hovering close enough for the pads of his fingers to brush your skin as if afraid that touching you will only cause more distress. The pain however, is already beginning to dissipate, and if you weren't so focused on reaching for your jumper's hem, you'd notice how Eideard's lips move swiftly but quietly, murmuring words too old for comprehension. To your relief, the agony fades to a mere twinge by the time you swat Karn's fingers away and peel your clothing back, eyes doubling in size once you register the impressive, purpling bruise that covers the entirety of your side.

“Oh...Oh, God,” you whimper, pressing a few fingers to the tender spot, “Karkinos.. I – I...How?”

You knew you'd be hurt after the colossal bug launched you into a solid, stone wall. Hell, laying there on the ground, you'd been convinced you were about to die.

“Where's Death?” you cough instead, aware that your throat has begun to close up, “Is he okay?”

“The Horseman is fine,” Eideard promises, impressed but perturbed by your concern for someone other than yourself when you've obviously suffered the worst. He shakes his head. 'Humans.'

“How am I still alive?”

“Perhaps you are more resilient than you thought.” Leaning heavily against his staff, he adds, “We do not know what happened to you beyond what Death told us when he brought you here – that this was Karkinos's doing.”

Around you, Karn's fingers start to curl inwards and his chest rumbles in the wake of a deep growl. Even you can't deny that the name itself sends a shiver down your spine. Swallowing, you plant a hand against your chest and rub absently at it, trying to soothe the heart that has suddenly begun to thunder beneath your fingertips. Eideard continues to speak, though his voice gradually diminishes until all you can hear is a pounding between your ears. Confused for a moment, you blearily peer up at the Old one, noting how far away he seems, though he's standing mere feet away, clasping his staff in a white-knuckle grip. He calls your name, that much you do hear, and you meet his eye, forcing yourself to concentrate on his words despite the growing tightness in your chest.

“Are you alright?” he seems to be asking, “You have a look as though you've seen a ghost.”

You open your mouth to reply, only to fall silent when you notice you've begun to tremble, barely noticeable from an outsiders standpoint, at least at first. A moment later however, and you suddenly buck in Karn's hand, the shivers spreading from your hands to your feet. But it isn't the shaking that disturbs you into silence, it's the resounding 'ba-dum,' 'ba-dum,' 'badum!,' in your chest that grows faster and faster, harder and then even harder still until you begin to wonder if your ribcage is strong enough to keep your heart in place.

“K-Karn,” you force out, sitting rigidly in his palm, “put me down.”

Instead, the young maker hesitates, a reluctance in his movements as he draws you a little closer to his chest and frowns, asking, “Why? What's wrong?”

His presence is suddenly all around you, encompassing you in his smell, a suffocating warmth pressing in from every angle and his voice rings deafeningly in your ear as he calls your name over and over again – it's too much. He's too much and far, far too close.

Inhaling a breath that doesn't quite feel deep enough, you squeeze your eyes closed and interrupt him snappishly, “Karn, just shut up and put me down!”

You barely notice his flinch while you're so preoccupied by your own, full-bodied shudders. It's as though you'd struck him with a fist rather than with your words.

'Shut up?' he mouths, his ears tilting dejectedly towards the ground. Still, obediently, he does fall silent, getting up and turning to place you on the wall he'd just left, allowing you to slide gently from his palm onto the cool rock before he withdraws his hands and kneels in front of you.

Oblivious to the maker, you continue to fight for a regular breath but the air you do manage to suck in barely feels like it'll suffice, so you take smaller, faster breaths and hope they'll compensate, disappointed yet unsuprised to find they don't. You've been through this before several years ago. It didn't work then and you're almost certain it won't work now.

“What's happenin' to her?!” Karn twists his head towards Eideard, his face white as a sheet. The older maker, who'd been about to call Muria back over, suddenly hesitates and takes a second to observe you a little more closely, his eyes sharp and keen in spite of their age. You're still shaking fit-to-bust, your little chest heaving in and out as though you've just run a mile and your eyes are blown open wide, fixated on hands that curl into fists only to spring open again spasmodically. 'Okay,' you tell yourself, 'okay, okay, it's okay,' and then, because you can't form any other coherent thought, 'okay.'

After another minute of watching, the Old one grunts conclusively. “I believe,” he begins, “that she's only just realised how close she came to death, and now that truth is catching up to her.” Then, noting Karn's slumped shoulders and sullen expression, he adds, “I doubt she's in her right mind at the moment. Fear can cloud our judgement in many ways, make us say things we perhaps don't mean.” Eideard knows better than most that while the youngling likes to pretend his skin is as thick as stone, he secretly takes a lot more to heart than he lets on. The old maker can only hope he understands, and judging by the weak smile that flashes across his lips, Karn does.

“I also believe,” Eideard raises his voice and interrupts the youngling, who'd since turned back to you and had been in the process of reaching out, doubtlessly seeking to comfort, “that giving her some space might be better than not.”

The young maker chews his lip, despising how helpless he feels that yours isn't a problem he can simply blast into smithereens with his hammer, and in spite of the Old One's warning, he brushes a finger against your arm. “But she's-” However, the moment he makes contact, he's cut off by a strangled shout that leaps out of you as you wrench yourself away from his hand, gasping wetly, “Stop it! Get off!”

In an instant, the maker recoils, hands curling up against his chest and he casts his eyes to the floor, thoroughly admonished.

“Stop,” you repeat and hook your arms tightly around yourself, eyes unfocused as they stare past Karn, past the stone walls around you and into the face of a horror apparently only you can see. “You're not gonna die, stop it.”

And Eideard, ever the voice of sense and clarity, clasps both hands around his staff and thunks it's pommel on the ground. “No, you are not,” he agrees, “Muria and I made certain of that. There is nothing in Tri Stone that can hurt you now, I give you my word.”

Unfortunately, for all his good intentions, the Old One's word isn't worth a lot whilst you feel as if the ground could open up and swallow you whole at any moment, just as the jaws of Karkinos had done hours earlier. Even thinking about her cragged jaws sends another pang of fear sweeping through you and, without warning, you propel yourself onto your feet, struck by the urge to run away but finding your legs too unsteady to attempt such a deed. So, trapped in the darkest hollows of your own mind, you can only stand there, trembling on the wall, sweaty fingers pulling at the sleeves of your jumper until they're stretched while at the same time alternating between wanting to sit down and discovering that moving an inch is the most terrifying prospect in the universe right now.

The two makers meanwhile, can do little else but wait - one drawing from his boundless well of patience to refrain from pacing back and forth, and the other a fidgeting, restless mess of nerves.

Seconds tick into minutes and those minutes trickle by until almost fifteen have passed and it's only when the sun has reached its peak in the midday sky that the world ceases to fall apart around you and the pit of dread that had opened up in your stomach shrinks until it disappears altogether and you're left wondering why on Earth it had ever appeared in the first place.

Gradually, the glaze in your eyes also diminishes enough for Eideard to pinpoint the moment you regain your usual cognizence. It isn't difficult, considering the grimace you adopt before collapsing onto your backside in the dirt, utterly spent.

“Y/n?” he calls, “How are you feeling?”

For a few moments, you don't respond save for drawing your knees up and burying your head behind them. Karn's mouth falls open and closed several times whilst he tries to think of something that can fill the silence, eventually clearing his throat and settling on reiterating the Old one's query. However, he's cut short when a muffled groan is pushed through the fabric of your skirt and catches their ears. “You weren't s'posed to see that.”

All around you, the world starts cutting through the exhausted haze clouding your brain and funnily enough, now you wish the ground really would open up to swallow you whole. It's a mortifying thing, to be caught in the throes of panic, worse still when there are witnesses present to see you at one of your lowest moments.

Eideard has too much self restraint to let out his pent up sigh of relief at hearing you speak, whereas Karn all but melts into an oversized puddle on the floor.

“I think, given the circumstances, a reaction like that is more than deserved,” Eideard tells you, perhaps recognising the shame that rolls off your body in palpable waves. The Old One's headpiece clanks softly as he shifts his weight, a frown hanging heavy above his eyes when the attempt at reassurance isn't enough to draw you out from behind your knees, much to his dismay. “Would you...prefer to be alone?” He's highly reluctant, of course, a primitive instinct telling him that he ought to stay, but if solitude is what you require, he would provide, and he even leans down to place a steady hand on Karn's shoulder, prepared to drag the youngling away by force if need be. So it comes as a relief that you hesitate briefly, then shake your head and mumble, “No,” into your skirt.

Eideard's face breaks out into a relaxed smile.

Letting go of Karn, he pulls away and nods, leaning back against the wall once more, content – for the time being - to watch the plants around him unfurl as their roots feel about for the first taste of water they've had in years.

In the meantime, Karn's attention is fixed on the flecks of dirt trapped beneath his fingernails and he busies himself with trying to get at it, every now and then stealing glances up at you. After another few minutes of peaceful quiet during which you get your breathing back under control, he looks up once again and promptly stiffens, his eyes locking with your own.

The maker stares, mesmerised by the way your irises stand out brightly against a red-tinged scelera. Then, realising he's staring openly, he drops his gaze down to his knees.

The sound of a raw throat being cleared twitches his ears. “Karn?”

Your voice is so gentle, evidently subdued by exhaustion. It's a stark contrast to the clipped staccato you'd hit him with earlier. Falteringly, the young maker lifts his head, bringing the two of you eye-level with each other.

Scratching sheepishly at the back of your neck, you wet your lips to speak, however, before you can utter a sound, he unexpectedly blurts, “M'really sorry! I didnae mean to be a nuisance! I-”

Eideard sighs without taking his eyes off an especially blue flower. “Let the girl speak, Lad,”

With a click, the youngling's jaw snaps shut and he ducks his head with a grimace, looking so put out that you somehow find the energy to offer a sympathetic smile, which remains for a moment before fatigue shoves it off your face and you exhale, feeling a hell of a lot older than you really are. “I told you to shut up,” you begin, biting a loose piece of skin on your lip.

Letting out a nervous huff of laughter, Karn twiddles his thumbs in his lap, deliberately avoiding your eye. “Heh, yeah....”

He's too proud. Too bolshie and self-conscious to ever admit how much it hurt to hear those words, and especially to hear them from you, although he knows he should be neither surprised nor upset. Silently cursing himself for becoming so attached that he could be affected like this, he almost misses your next words.

“I'm really sorry, Karn.”

At last, the maker's head lifts.

“I didn't mean that, I didn't mean it at all,” you continue, each word packed with conviction, “Listen, you didn't know what was going on, so it is not your fault. It's just ...Sometimes, humans do this thing where we, like...Well. We just panic – totally out of the blue – and when it happens, we stop thinking, uh-” You snap your fingers, “-rationally! That's the word. It's hard to describe, but, shit just gets so overwhelming and all I wanna do is be somewhere quiet and safe where nothing and no one can touch me. You know?”

Karn – who'd been listening with rapt attention lest he forget any detail you tell him – nods vigorously, his eyes busy mapping the lines and movements of your face. He doesn't want to forget that either.

“It isn't personal, I promise,” you say, oblivious to the scrutiny you're under, “I once told my best friend in the whole world to eff off. So, yeah.”

Despite the pang of jealousy that zooms through his chest at the mention of your 'best friend,' Karn allows his shoulders to slump, relief pouring over him like a soothing balm.

You don't hate him.

The maker's face brigthens around a toothy grin which you return, albeit with a less exuberance. There's still a hesitancy to him though, an angle to his ears that doesn't sit right with you in spite of his jovial smile.

After pondering this for a moment or two, you slowly push yourself onto your knees and shuffle forward, arms opening up invitingly.

Karn loses his smile almost immediately, his lips pulling together instead to form a small, 'o,' and he blinks, caught off guard as you twitch your hands to beckon him closer.

Gulping, the maker tentatively raises his palms and clasps them over the lip of the wall you're knelt on, bracing himself to lean towards you until his stubbled chin brushes against granite and he can feel your breath wash over his nose. The youngling doesn't quite know what to expect when you promptly reach out and place the very tips of your fingers on his flushed cheeks, both of which swiftly turn crimson at the contact. Terrified but filled with an exhilaration he's never known before, Karn remains utterly still, helpless and vulnerable under your touch despite his immensity.

There's a minute twinge in your side as you raise your arms that reminds you of your injuries, but it's easily brushed aside. Frankly, you've been in more pain than this before. Hell, a skimmed knee on the playground gave you more grief. Whatever Eideard and Muria had done is working wonders. Besides, the prospect of a comforting touch is too tempting to pass up. Suddenly, your eyes slide shut and you tip forwards, a groan catching in your throat as you realise how much you've missed basic, human contact. You've taken for granted how often you used to receive physical touches from your fellow humans. Even animals. When was the last time you stroked a dog? Or gave one of your friends a hug?

You're vaguely aware that Karn is worrying aloud, though his words fall on deaf ears.

You miss breathing in the smell of your mother's cardigan when you hugged her and the traces of perfume that lingered on her skin after she returned from a dinner party. Floral. You always hated that perfume. Now, you'd give anything to be able to smell it just one, more time.

“I'm sorry,” you croak whilst a teardrop slides down to the tip of your nose. 'What the hell am I doing? First a panic attack and now an emotional breakdown?'

'You almost died,' a softer voice whispers at the edge of your mind and for once, you try listening to the latter.

Something presses briefly to your spine before disappearing again a split second later. Then, you feel rather than hear Karn murmur, “Is it happenin' again?”

Laughing wetly, you shake your head. “No, no. This is just...another weird thing humans do.”

“I don't think it's weird.”

You don't respond.

“Y/n?”

“Mmm?”

Through heavy-lidded eyes, you watch him catch his bottom lip between his teeth, worrying at it for a little while before he asks, “Can I-...?” The pressure on your back returns, barely there. A question, a gentle request.

It's enough to break the spell of hesitancy that's been lingering in the air and before you can even think to be embarrassed, you've placed the flats of your palms upon the maker's cheeks and pulled yourself closer, severing any distance between you. Karn, for his part, actually shivers as you drape your entire weight against him, your head nestling comfortably into the side of his nose and setting his face ablaze at the sudden act of intimacy. However, he only allows a mere second of dithering to pass, and then he wastes no more time in sliding his fingers around your delicate torso, ever mindful of the enormous bruise tainting your side. A hefty thumb pushes into your stomach and at the same time, your back is gathered up by Karn's fingers, pinning you inside a loose and tentative grasp and drawing you as near as possible so that you're pressed flush to the youngling's skin.

It isn't the most conventional hug. In fact, it's one of the strangest embraces you've ever been a part of. But it is just that. An embrace: Something you've been unconsciously seeking after you left Earth. Karn's attempt doesn't fix the lonely hole inside your chest, not by a longshot. But by God, it helps just having a hand with the power to topple mountains at your back and the comforting warmth of a friend against your cheek. Right now, it's as close as you're going to come to having the arms of a fellow human wrapped around you whilst they in turn are nearly suffocated by your crushing grip.

For the first time in days, a very small shard of glass untwists itself from your heart and its absence prompts you to expel all the air from your lungs in a sigh as enduring and steady as the stone underfoot.

Karn in the meantime, can barely breathe for all the oxygen in the realm. He'd heard of humans' legendary capacity for expressing and receiving affection – so unusual that other species had marked it as one of their predominant traits, not far behind 'weak' and 'cunning.' The makers are a hardy race, and like many other species, solely express intimacy within their own, close-knit circles. So, in Karn's opinion, the fact that you're kneeling against him with your arms enveloping his face and your scent percolating through every receptive pore speaks volumes to the young maker. In his eyes, this is you trusting him entirely - the highest declaration of friendship you can give.

The youngling hums pleasantly and a dopey smile stretches from cheek to cheek, his eyes slipping shut in clear contentment.

Across the way, standing silent and still as a statue, Eideard's discreet gaze has turned to survey the exchange, melancholy haunting the lines between his eyebrows. The Universe rarely deals a fair hand to those who've already known struggle, and although you've faced more than your fair share of hardships and tragedies, the Old one is willing to bet with utmost certainty that there will be further grief in the coming days.

'But not now,' he reminds himself, appraising the scene before him, 'Not at this moment.'

At this moment, here in Tri-Stone, tucked against the mountainside beneath warm suns and a pale, blue sky, there exists a rare peace that emanates directly from the two beings knelt together in a Shaman's garden. In the distance, the clashing of steel can be heard as Thane lays his frustration out on some, unfortunate training dummy, the warrior's grunts and restrained battle-cries mingling with the soft, gurgled harmony of lava and water tumbling from their respective pipes in the mountain.

For the first time in a great many years, Eideard dares to permit a flicker of hope to ignite in his weary chest.

Things are finally, finally changing. And he dare say they're changing for the better.

Just then, a disappointed groan snags his attention and he swivels his head over to Karn, noting that the youngling's features have screwed up into a childish pout for the fact that you've pulled away at last, severing the connection between you and drawing your hands from his cheeks. Blowing out a whoosh of air, you let your arms drop into your lap before inhaling again, long and deep through your nose until your lungs are full to the brim. “Phew, thanks for that,” you say, tilting your head at the maker in front of you, “Are we good?”

Karn doesn't hesitate in nodding enthusiastically. “Aye! We're good.”

“Good, good.”

“Good, good, good.”

A grin quirks at the edge of your mouth and you snort softly, falling quiet soon after, the amusment fading from your eyes. There's a peculiar expression tugging at the space between your brows that deepens as you start glancing around, first over your own shoulder and then over Karn's. “So, where is Death?”

With a grunt, Eideard pushes his heavy bulk up and off the wall, hands wrapped around his staff and he tramps steadily into the centre of Muria's gazebo. “The horseman took off not long after he brought you here,” he explains, sweeping his gaze along the length of the village.

“Oh...” Pulling your legs from underneath you and swinging them out over the wall's edge - in turn forcing Karn to back up unless he wants his jaw kicked – you consider your hands for a while, thumbs twiddling over one another until, falteringly, you ask, “Did he, um...Did he seem....off, to you?”

Eideard blinks. “He was a little out of sorts,” he replies, “Said hardly a word bar the name of your assailant.”

Letting out a breath that must have somehow become lodged in your chest, you relax a fraction. If Death had turned up in Tri-Stone parading as that....that Reaper, then it'd be among the first things Eideard would mention, surely. If truth be told, deep down, you'd been as terrified of Death in that moment as you were of Karkinos. In your mind's eye, you can still clearly see the dark, empty hood, hear the rattling breaths that emanated from somewhere within that blackness, and the cold!...

Goosebumps prickle along your arms after you recall how that oppressive chill had sunk through you and clung to your bones. You'd heard of the icy embrace of death but you never thought for a second you'd actually experience it and live to tell the tale. Not many humans can claim that accomplishment.

Realising that you've unconsciously wrapped yourself up in your arms, you give a start and force them down to your sides, all the while watched by a pair of curious makers, Eideard in particular, who studies you carefully from the corner of his eye. He takes your lack of verbal response to mean – rightly so – that you're currently trapped in your own thoughts. So, hoping that a gentle nudge will prompt you into speaking your mind, he clears his throat, waiting for you to look up at him before he says, “You must have worried the Horseman greatly.”

You don't mean to let a snort slip out, but it does so anyway. “I don't know about worried,” you mutter, leaning forwards to measure the distance between your feet and the ground below, “he's more likely to be pissed off with me for not listening to him again, pardon my french.”

The old maker shoots you a pointed look and you assume it's because he doesn't approve of your vocabulary until he asks, “You don't think anger and worry can exist side by side?”

You'd been in the process of sliding yourself over the lip of the wall but his words suddenly give you pause.

He's not wrong.

As a child, if you were ever caught doing something your parents considered dangerous, your father would always sit you down and reprimand you with a stern lecture, a deep frown on his face yet concern interwoven into his voice. At the time, you assumed he was furious. Now that you're older and somewhat wiser, you know better.

But just the prospect of Death worrying, about you no less, conjures such a bizarre image, you struggle to visualise it properly.

“I guess they could,” you shrug noncommitally and push yourself off the wall, dropping a few feet to the ground justs seconds before Karn's hand whips out and he balks, a warning just shy of his tongue. It's too late for that anyway.

You hit the ground and immediately buckle, a sharp gasp ripped from your lungs as the impact sends a spasm harpooning straight up your side. “Mother f-!” Dropping to a knee, you bite down hard on your tongue and hold in the scream you'd almost let slip.

Large hands appear on either side of you, though they're swiftly waved away. “I'm alright, I'm fine,” you grimace and draw in a steadying breath, remaining on one knee until the pain dulls to something manageable. It only takes a moment, and when it's ignorable, you clumsily stagger back to your feet and glance over a shoulder at the wall. “Well, that was stupid, huh?”

“Pushing yourself may prove detrimental,” Eideard says, tactfully neglecting to agree or disagree.

“No need to be so polite, Old One,” a gruff and familiar voice calls out from the entrance of the gazebo, causing all three of you to swivel your heads around and stare at the figure emerging up the steps. “If she's being stupid, tell her so. Creator knows she'll never learn otherwise.”

For a sliver of a moment, every other thought flees your head, replaced entirely by mind-boggling relief.

“Death!” you shout and stumble around Karn towards the Horseman, any fear you might have harboured cast aside for the time being in the wake of suddenly seeing your friend again.

'Friend?'

The word trips you up and brings you screeching back into yourself and you shake your head, trailing to a halt just a few feet from the Horseman, your smile withering and dying with one glance at your 'friend's' face. From this angle, you can spot how the underside of Death's jaw quivers as its muscles work over one another, like he's grinding his teeth to Oblivion under there. Trailing your gaze tentatively upwards, you find he's fixing you with a hard glare, the fires of his irises burning hotter than Alya's forge. If anything, he looks as if he's as far from 'friendly' as it gets.

He gives you a slow once-over, his glare lingering on your bad side and the leg you're unconsciously favouring.

Behind you, Karn gets to his feet and his shadow falls across you.

“You're alive then,” the Horseman finally says, an edge to his voice suggestive of a simmering pot that's about to boil over.

The tightness in your chest returns but you swiftly gulp it down. You may be standing in front of Death made flesh, but you're ninety nine percent certain he won't hurt you.

Slowly, his hands curl into tight fists.

...Ninety seven percent.

“Yeah, I'm alive,” you smile weakly and throw a thumb over your shoulder, “Thanks to Eideard and Muria, and you, of course.”

“Of course.” He draws in a breath, like he wants to say something else but then peers up at the makers standing behind you and stops, jaw clicking shut audibly.

The village Elder must have sensed the growing tension, for the next thing you know, he's sweeping forwards and places his boot deliberately close to your side. “Horseman,” he greets, bowing his head, “You never gave me the chance to thank you, for restoring the Tears to our land.”

The only acknowledgement he receives comes in the form of a gruff, “Mmm,” and Death nods sharply, at last tearing his eyes off your jumper and fixing Eideard with a scrupulous stare. “Not to be abrupt, Old One, but I'd rather skip the pleasantries for today. Tell me I'm getting closer to the Tree of Life?”

In response, the maker lifts a hand and beckons for everyone to follow him as he trundles past Death and out of the gazebo.

Stepping aside, the Horseman roughly gestures for you to go ahead of him. There's something about having a grumpy Nephilim at your back that feels vaguely threatening, but you traipse by nonetheless, keeping your head down as his eyes follow you unblinkingly across the garden. Unbeknownst to you however, once he falls behind you, Death instantly switches his attention to your weaker leg and takes note of each faltering step you take, his teeth bared of their own accord.

Once the entirety of your little group emerges from the garden, Eideard inhales and releases a keen, melodious whistle that splits the air and rings out across the village, prompting Alya, Valus and Muria look up. Quick as a flash, the twins drop what they're doing and bid farewell to their fellow maker, who gracefully dips her head and ushers them out of their forge.

Eideard meets them in the centre, just in front of the great door that leads into their old makers' forge, already alive and roaring inside due to the fire and water now flowing through Tri-Stone, a welcome sound, like the voice of the Stonefather himself.

You fall into step beside the Old One with Death stalking around him to stand nearest the door while Karn brings up the rear.

“It is time,” Eideard says, sweeping an arm to the entrance and casting his eyes over Alya and Valus, “I trust the two of you know what must be done?”

The Forge brother merely grunts, whereas his sister bounces on her toes, grinning like a true youngling and apparently the most excited of the bunch. “I cannae believe we're about to use a proper forge again!” she beams. At her side, Valus rumbles in agreement, his helmet swivelling around idly between each person until he stops, does a double take and elbows his sister in her ribs.

“Oi! What?” she gripes, following his line of sight down to Eideard's boots. Suddenly, Alya lets out a delighted gasp. “Y/n!”

You'd been so preoccupied with scowling at the ground and analysing Death's behaviour that her exclaimation jerks you back to reality and you have all of a second to clumsily blurt, “Huh? Wha-” before you're swept up into the air, your stomach lurching as it's left behind.

Clutched between two rough and weathered hands, the excitible maker swings you in a circle and holds you out in front of her, eyes sparkling like the sun on water.

“You're okay!”

“I will be once my head stops spinning!” you quip, grinning through the dizzyiness and the uncomfortable twinge beneath her fingertips.

Just then, to the shock of all involved, Death's hand flies out towards you and he barks, “Be careful!”

Slowly, every head turns to regard him as if he's sprouted an extra head.

Realising what he'd let slip, the Horseman darts his gaze to the side and leans back onto one leg, arms folding curtly across his chest. “You keep spinning her around like that and she'll empty her stomach all over your apron.”

“I will not!” Your lower lip sticks out indignantly, though your ribs are quietly grateful when Alya smirks, flashes you a wink and plops you back onto the ground.

“Keep your hair on, Horseman, I weren't gonna drop her!”

From the corner of your eye, you watch Death bristle. “That is not what-”

“If I might interrupt?” Eideard thunks his staff on the ground assertively and even the pride-wounded Nephilim holds his tongue, instead settling to glare at Alya from afar.

The Elder shoots her a withering look that somehow lacks any kind of real bite before he turns and starts for the doorway, calling over his shoulder, “Perhaps it would be best not to waste any more time? I for one, am rather anxious – as I'm sure we all are – to see the Forge breathe life once more.”

“Hmph, about time.” Death's shoulders gradually fall to their usual height as his anger wanes.

The Old one shuffles up to the door with Valus striding ahead and holding it open for the rest of the group. However, as soon as Eideard has his back turned, Alya swivels her head down to Death again and, to your amusement, sticks her tongue out at him, then saunters into the forge, flicking her hair as she goes and earning herself an offended sputter from the wounded party.

You share a glance with Karn which proves to be fatal, for the next moment, you're both trying to muffle snickers behind your hands. At least until an extremely heated Horseman whips his head around to glare daggers at you, rendering the two of you silent with nothing more than a look that promises endless suffering if you don't zip your lips.

He holds the two of you captive under his stare for a moment longer and then with unnerving slowness, he spins about and heads after the others, and after tossing one more tight-lipped smirk at Karn, you follow suit and pass through the open door. You thank Valus for holding it and the burly maker tips his helm at you curiously before he releases the heavy stone, allowing it to swing back into place with a raucous creak.

-------------------------------------

There's no denying, the makers' forge is sweltering.

Lava bubbles and broils through a canal that spans the entire length of the chamber and basks everything in its warm, red glow. At the very centre, encirled by a smooth, stone wall and toiling away at their enormous anvil like a well-oiled machine, Alya and Valus have set to work forging...something. Despite their size, the siblings move around each other with a fluidity and practiced ease that's as mesmerising as it is impressive.

From your perch on the wall, you watch them forge, entranced, with your jaw hanging almost to the floor as if you were seeing the world's most heavy-footed ballet.

Valus tosses his sister a hunk of grey metal and she catches it gracefully, transferring it into the blazing fire. Faster than you anticipate, the metal burns red hot and when Alya leans close to retrieve it with a pair of tongs, her glistening face is cast in an ethereal, golden glow. Although seemingly transfixed on her task, she flicks her eyes over in your direction and catches you staring.

Smirking, the maker saunters back to the anvil and deposits the still shimmering slab down on top of it. Then, sparing another fleeting glance to ensure you're still watching, she grabs a hammer from her brother and raises it above her head. Immediately, your eyes wander to the quivering muscles on her arms that bunch and twitch under the strain as she slams the hammer down onto the piece of metal, filling the forge with a resonant clang that leaves your ears ringing. It isn't just your ears that suffer though. At the point of impact, you're abruptly forced to throw a hand over your eyes when a searing beam of blue light bursts from the metal and shoots straight up to the ceiling, fading just as rapidly as it had come. The next time she strikes, the light becomes a little more bearable until eventually, you can return your gaze to Alya's task. Over and over she shapes the slab while Valus drags a barrel over to the nearby trough of water and dips it inside, filling it almost to the brim.

“What's the matter?” The forge sister's question breaks your awestruck study of her impressive biceps, “Never seen a maker at work before?”

Wiping a bead of sweat from the tip of your nose, you return her sly grin and reply, “Oddly enough, I can't say I've ever had the pleasure. It's like watching a dance!”

A low chuckle rumbles out of Valus's helm and Alya huffs, inspecting the metal closely, then lifts the hammer once again. “A dance? Don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not. Makers do not dance.”

You wait until the following smash of steel on steel fades before elaborating. “Well, I meant it as a compliment. I just mean you two make it look so effortless, but beautiful too, if you get me.”

The young maker's eyelashes flutter, letting you know you've caught her off guard. “Beautiful?” she echoes softly, letting go of the hammer with one hand to tuck a thick plait of auburn hair over her shoulder. The sharp smirk has vanished too, and in its place, something warmer takes root. All too soon though, with a rapid shake of her head, that familiar cockiness returns. “Flatterer,” she accuses kindly.

Smiling at your crosstalk, she picks up the now moulded hunk of metal and hands it to her brother, the thick, leathery gloves helping to protect her palms from the heat. Obediently, Valus takes it, and even when you strain to get a better look, his meaty paw obscures the object from view.

You can't even begin to guess what they're making.

Unable to help yourself, you raise your voice to reach Eideard, who stands silently close by and observes the forging as a teacher would oversee his students. “So, what is it they're making?” Your question is almost drowned out as Valus chooses that particular moment to dunk the metal into a vat of water where it cools with a vehement hiss.

The Old One raises a finger at you, the universal command to 'wait,' whilst he steps up to Valus and reaches out a hand with the palm turned up, ready to receive the finished product.

“At last....at long last.”

Your ears twitch, picking up the wistful sigh that flows from his lips when he holds it and uses the fingertips of one hand to stroke reverently over the object from end to end before eventually swinging about and holding it up for you to see. “This, Little one” he begins, “is a Makers' key.”

Without noticing, you've somehow slipped off the low wall, treading cautiously across the forge towards Eideard, your eyes never once leaving his hands. It is indeed, upon closer inspection, a key. And an enormous one at that, about as long as you are tall. Staring up at it from the maker's feet, you give an appraising whistle. “I've got to see the door that unlocks!”

At your back, Karn snickers but he's quickly shushed by Alya.

“You will find no door to fit this particular key,” Eideard patiently explains in spite of the interruption, “Rather, it is used to unlock stone.”

“Stone?” you repeat, one side of your nose scrunching up.

An icy chill prickles at the skin of your arms when Death looms out from whatever shadow he'd been lurking in and moves to stand beside you. Drawing your brows together, you try to ignore the fact that his proximity raises the hairs on your skin and his long shadow eerily resembles the hooded figure you now know lurks beneath the surface of his skin.

“Aye,” the old maker replies, “Namely, the Guardian. Meant to be our greatest weapon, and capable of clearing the forest around the Tree.”

Using his staff, he gestures towards an enormous door on the far side of the forge, one you have yet to venture beyond and, admittedly, hadn't even realised exists until now. “Beyond those doors lays the Foundry,” he explains once he notices the newfound curiosity on your face, “It is where we began his construction, but alas, an earthquake drove us out and, now, I fear something else roams within.”

Eideard stills a moment and a darkness appears in the space under his eyebrows, his whole body seeming to sag, its bones simply too old and too weary to keep the maker standing up straight. “The Guardian,” he thrums, eyes lost in a memory, as though he's forgotten anyone else is in the room, “was never finished.”

Disarmed by his sudden look of fraility you'd never have expected from the Elder, you take a step towards him, caught under some, misguided impression that you would actually be able to hold him upright. Eideard spots the movement, regardless of how small it is, and some of the weight does lift from his shoulders as he endeavours to stand a little straighter, a tender expression softening his wizened features.

Raising his voice, Death chooses that moment to address one of his concerns. “If the Guardian is your masterwork, then how am I to complete him?”

Briefly, you wonder if he'd deliberately avoided using the term, 'we,' but soon enough, Eideard's reply is distracting you from the nagging thought.

“In the forest lies another construct,” he explains, “One of the few remaining who have not fallen to Corruption. He is not as vast as the Guardian, but his heart is strong. Seek him out, and he will guide you to the Foundry. There, you may activate the Guardian, using the Makers' Key.”

“So this key-” Death gestures loosely to it, still clutched in the maker's steady grasp. “- It... awakens the constructs?”

The Old One bows his head. “Yes. Constructs do not have a soul, like you or I... not until that soul is given. This key unlocks the stone, and prepares it for the ebb and flow of a maker's life force.”

At your side, the Horseman shifts, a scoff of laughter shaking his shoulders. “And what makes you think I have a soul, Old One.”

And without missing a beat, Eideard raises a brow and replies, “Isn't that what troubles you?”

The click of Death's jaw snapping shut is loud enough to be heard above the forge's ambiance and a pensive silence follows, just begging to be broken. You risk a glance at the Horseman, only to find he's turned his head away from you and the maker. Frowning, you contemplate how it hasn't ever occurred to you that Death doesn't have a soul. It simply isn't something you've called into question, easier to assume that – yes, he's alive, and therefore, he must have one. Now though, with the query lingering in the air like an unpleasant smell, you can't help but wonder as to the answer. After all, can Death technically be considered 'alive?' You only have to puzzle over it for a moment before swiftly deciding that you know too little of souls and the universe to try and philosophise it, so instead, you ask another question that's been burning at the back of your mind. “Wait, how exactly are we supposed to find this construct?”

You can't be sure, but you think you can hear the Horseman breathe a sigh of relief that the attention has been directed away from the matter of his 'soul.'

Eideard however, looks a little perturbed. Brows furrowing, he sucks in a breath and gives you a quick up and down glance. You don't miss the way his eyes briefly flash towards Death before coming back to land on you once more. “There is a temple,” he begins slowly, “out in Baneswood, to the east. If he is anywhere, that is where you will find him.”

“Then that's where I'm going,” Death suddenly pipes up and jerks his chin towards the maker key in Eideard's hand. After drumming his fingernails over its metal surface for several beats, the old maker finally relents. “Here, Horseman. Take it-” He holds his precious cargo out for Death, muttering as an afterthought, “-Before I come to my senses.”

Letting a rare and genuine chuckle grace the air, Death lifts the Maker Key out of Eideard's hand and slips it safely inside a trouser pocket. “You seem more likely to lose them, Old One.” With a good natured click of his tongue, the maker shooes him away and the Horseman turn and readies himself to leave, only to freeze in his tracks when he comes face to face with you.

For the better part of a minute, Death's focus stays on you and the rest of Tri Stone fades away as his eyes rove down to your side once more, lingering a fraction too long. There's a tightness in his chest that wasn't there before.

Then, just as easily as he'd become trapped by your trusting gaze, he feels his mind kick back into gear. Blinking, Death snatches his head to the side and forces his legs to carry him through the forge, past the central dais and on towards the main entrance, zipping by Alya, Valus and Karn without a word.

In his stead, you crane your neck back to send the oldest maker a reassuring grin. “Don't worry, we'll be back in no time.”

If the Old One had meant to object, he's too late in calling out, too late in stretching his withered hand after you, as if to hold you back. You've already spun away from him and hobbled after Death, sparing Alya and Valus a wave goodbye and missing the troubled fang she stuffs into her lip, the urgent huff her brother emits.

You can, however, feel their eyes on the back of your head as you leave.

Before too long - and completely as expected - another heavy set of footfalls begins to shake the ground under your boots.

You’re able to tell without even looking that Karn is following as well.

The doors ahead of you have already thudded shut by the time you reach them, so you habitually press a shoulder against one and try to shove it open. But all of a sudden, a white heat sears across the bruise on your ribs with such ferocity, it brings you to your knees, stealing a ragged gasp from you as well.

Another gasp, this time from a different source, alerts you to Karn's distress and seconds later, his hand is looming in front of your nose, palm tilted towards the ceiling. Lifting your head, you shoot the maker a grateful smile and rest your own hand over his proffered thumb.

“Maybe don't try openin' any maker-made doors while you've got that thumpin' great bruise on yer side, eh?” he teases, pulling you to your feet again, “Might be askin' a wee bit too much of yourself.”

“Duly noted.”

Smirking, the youngling stretches an arm over your head and places his palm flat on the door where, after giving it a single push, throws it open, letting a stray beam of sunlight warm your face.

Inhaling a breath of fresh, mountain air, you peer outside and immediately spot the elusive Horseman, sweeping up the steps onto Tri Stone's central courtyard with his indigo cowl pulled high around his neck, and – to your pleasant surprise – a familiar crow perched upon his shoulder. You'd been wondering where he'd gotten to.

“Hey,” you call out, “wait up!” A few tentative steps reassure you that the previous burst of pain had only been fleeting. So, emboldened, you break into a slow jog, eventually pulling up alongside Death and peering at him from the corner of your eye, though his own remain fixed ahead, to the gate leading out of Tri Stone.

Letting out a brazen caw, Dust hops around to face you and flaps down onto your shoulder, landing heavily enough to almost tip you off balance. “Dust!” you chirrup, reaching up and brushing the back of a finger down his chest, “Where've you been? I missed you!”

In response, the enormous crow flares the feathers around his neck and nips playfully at the tip of your ear, deep warbles emanating from his throat. “Aw, were you worried about me?”

In a fashion that reminds you entirely of the Horseman, Dust twists his beak away stubbornly and the claws on your shoulder give a cautioning squeeze, but his warbling doesn't cease as he settles himself down close to your neck.

You grin fondly at the bird for a moment before Death recaptures your attention, prompting you to lean forwards and peer at him around the crow. The air between you feels thicker somehow, the distance twice as long as it had been in the Drenchfort. Something has changed, and for once, you wish he would be a little more direct, rather than subject you to this ominous silent treatment.

'Silent...' You hum pensively, brow pinched. 'The creature Death turned into yesterday was eerily quiet too.' It suddenly strikes you that you know very little about the Horseman. As disturbing as that cloaked spectre was, you are still a human, and prone to the occasionaly bout of curiosity.

“That...monster, i-in the Drenchfort,” you ask carefully, ”that really was you, wasn't it?”

The only indication that he'd even heard you comes from the tightening of his jaw, one of the few features on his face that isn't concealed by a bone mask. Your gut twinges guiltily. Perhaps 'monster' was an insensitive term to use. Rushing to assure him that your comment had been nothing more than a Fruedian slip, you press on, “Well, I'm glad you had that nifty little trick up your sleeve. Scared the life out of me before I realised it was you though.”

Silence is all that follows, broken only by the steady clomping of the maker following behind you.

“In any case, I've been meaning to thank you, for saving me. Things were looking very dicey at the end there...” Once more, you trail off to chew at a loose bit of skin on your lip, though mainly, you're leaving time for Death to say something. Anything would be better than nothing at all. An acknowledging grunt, a scornful huff, it doesn't much matter, you only wish you didn't have to keep filling the uncomfortable quiet. Instead, disappointingly, Death pushes on ahead, outpacing you easily with his longer strides until he's several feet in front, leaving you to stare at the back of his head and wring your hands before trotting up behind him. “It wasn't all bad though, was it? I mean, before everything went totally 'A Bug's Life', it was actually kind of...fun-”

Without warning, the Horseman stops dead in his tracks. Thanks to the jarring change of pace, you collide with him painfully and Dust shoots from your shoulder into the air, away from potential danger. Once you've staggered backwards to right yourself, he rounds on you, fists clenched at his sides and a dangerous arch in his spine. “You have no idea what this is, do you!?”

Bowled over by the viciousness of his turn, you try to backpeddle, almost tripping on your own feet until Death snatches his hands out and grips the front of your jumper, hauling you off the ground and up to his mask. “This. Is not. A game!” he bellows so loudly, your eardrums rattle, “This is not some – some fun little adventure where you can get yourself beaten to a pulp, then fixed up by a maker, only to go out and do it all over again!”

Horrified, you try to stretch your toes to gather purchase on the ground, gasping out, “Why are you getting so worked up about it!? I knew the risks! So did you! You let me come with you!”

“That-!” For a fatal moment, he falters, shakes his head. “That is not the point!”

But you know you've been heard. His tone has already lost some of its bite and he lowers you back to the ground, fists gradually unfurling from the front of your jumper.

Stumbling several feet back once you're free, you stare up at him incredulously. “Then what is the point? Why are you being so prickly all of a sudden?”

“You,” he seethes, “are always doing stupid things that almost end up getting you killed!” Eyes flashing, the Horseman raises a rawboned hand in front of your face and begins counting off on his fingers. “You throw yourself at a corrupted construct outside the Cauldron, you try to take on a corrupted construct inside the Cauldron, you attacked Karkinos! Who – need I remind you – was hundreds of times your size!”

“She was hundreds of times bigger than you too,” you try arguing, only to find yourself rudely cut off when Death's hands fly out again, this time grasping your shoulders and digging sharp fingernails into the skin beneath your jumper.

“She almost killed you, you foolish human!” He punctuates his words by giving you a hard shake, his tone overwrought and strained....Just as your father's had once been....

It hits you like a sack of bricks that maybe Eideard had been right all along. Maybe the Horseman does care, at least a little more than he lets on.

The fingers still fastenened around your upper arms are beginning to hurt however, and it must show in your expression because after glaring into your face, Death blinks, his luminous eyes growing wide and he instantly jerks his hands back, staring down at you as though he'd only just remembered you're human.

Miserable shock still coursing through your veins, you eye the Horseman warily as he forces his hands down to his sides and wheels about, marching determinedly towards the staircase next to Thane's arena. After hesitating for a few seconds, you cautiously follow.

Upon your approach, the old warrior lowers his hammer - giving the training dummy he'd been whacking a well-deserved break – and lets out a booming laugh that almost seems powerful enough to rattle the pebbles at your feet. “HA! Bloo~dy Hell, yer a stout one, eh Lass? Didn't think I'd see you up and walkin' about again for a while!”

You take a moment to throw Thane a distracted wave. “Y-yeah! Muria and Eideard worked their magic! Um – Death!? Wait!”

Throwing his hammer over one, titanic shoulder, Thane watches bemusedly as you chase the Horseman right up to the bottom of the stairs where he abruptly draws to a halt, one foot on the first step and his head hung low.

You slow down behind him too, eventually stopping in his shadow and tipping your head at his back. Heavy footfalls to your rear signal the hesitant approach of Karn who at least has the sense to maintain some distance, just enough that you and Death aren't overwhelmed.

Unsure of yourself and of what the Nephilim before you is thinking, you press your lips together, hardly daring to say anything that might sour his mood even further. Somehow, you only imagine you'll make things worse.

Evidently, Death doesn't like the quiet any more than you do, for all of a sudden, his head snaps up. “Karn?”

The maker behind you straightens attentively and stammers, “Uh, aye?”

Without turning around, Death jabs a thumb over his shoulder. “She is not to follow me out of that gate, do you understand?”

“O-oh, er...” The youngling blanches, his gaze switching between you and the Horseman and feeling very much like he's caught between a rock and a hard place.

At his feet, your jaw hangs open, eyebrows gradually closing in on one another as incredulity replaces hesitancy. “Uh, excuse me?!” you sputter.

Death's neck stiffly pivots around until one, fierce eye lands on the youngling. “Karn? Am. I. Clear?”

Although his heart is nearly begging him to appease the little human he's grown so fond of, the maker's head takes a stand, and for the first time in his life, he decides to go with the safer option. Defeatedly, he lowers his eyes to the ground, conveniently failing to meet your gaze when you throw a pleading look up at him. “Aye,” he mumbles, “She'll not follow you...”

“Karn!” you exclaim, causing the maker to flinch, his ears drooping.

But the Horseman isn't satisfied and he calls out to the warrior standing nearby as well. “Thane, make sure he holds to that.”

With a roll of his eyes, Thane waves his concern aside. “Aye, I got it,” he replies, lowering his voice to add, “You bossy so-and-so.”

With a scoff, you spin around to Death again. “What's this about? Why can't I go with you?!”

“You're injured,” he states coldly, “You'll only slow me down.”

“But... but what if something bad happens to you again? Let me come so I can help you!”

“Let me make this perfectly clear.” With an invisible power rippling just below the surface of his skin, he twists himself around to face you properly and growls, “I neither need, nor want your help. Have you forgotten what I am? That I've been surviving just fine without your interference for my entire life?”

“I know that!” you press, frustrated, “Saying I want to help you is not the same as saying you're incapable!”

“Why would you want to help me though, when you know I don't even need it?”

“Wh-!” A disbelieving scoff blows past your lips. “Gosh, I don't know! Maybe because that's what friends do? They help each other!”

That word, that dreaded word is out and off your tongue before you even realise what you'd just admitted. Stillness settles over the three of you as the weight of your blunder sinks in and Death's eyes fling open, alarmed.

Throughout his life, he's convinced himself that the concept of a friend is to have a weakness that can be exploited, it's to paint a target over their heads that tells enemies who to go after if they ever wanted to get to Death. He had hoped – prayed to a Creator he no longer knows exists – that you were sensible enough not to see him as anything more than the grim and glowering Horseman. Because if you ever saw him as a friend, he'd be plagued by that persistent glow in his chest which insists that being called 'friend' doesn't sound completely terrible. He'd have to acknowledge the question he's so far managed to refrain from answering; What does he consider you? What does it mean if he'd rather have you hate him but remain safe, than put you in danger yet stay on good terms? Karkinos had almost killed you, and that had been what it took to bring his Reaper form out of hiding - something that only happens under the most climacteric of circumstances.

Something in Death's chest constricts, which is odd, he thinks, given that there shouldn't be anything in there at all.

With the eyes of both you and Karn still fixed on him, the Horseman backs away further up the steps, shaking his head and uttering in a solemnn breath, “I'm not your friend.”

Then, without waiting to see your face crumple, he whirls about and storms towards the gate.

You swallow thickly and nod, lips pursed, unable to pretend that didn't hurt. It chips away at the confidence you've meticulously been building up since you arrived, leaves you suddenly unsure of yourself and wondering what you'd done so wrong that Death would rather leave you behind than have you as company.

Still....

You watch the Horseman's swiftly diminishing form until he's halfway up the steps. Although surly, tactless and belligerent to boot, Death has also shown you that there is a more amiable side to him, albeit buried deep, deep below the surface. He's saved your life, a lot. He seemed relieved that you weren't corrupted by a rogue construct and annoyed that you chose to try and save him. There've been certain things, patterns of behaviour here and there that clue you in to his softer nature, even though he might have tried to remain hard and distant at the time. One could say, however infrequently, that he's even behaved as a friend would.

Perhaps then, the difference in species is at fault here. Your definition of what a friend ought to be could very well differ wildly from his. He always seems surprised that you can take a liking to those around you so quickly, whereas he strikes you as a Horseman that's glacially slow to trust others. Perhaps it makes sense that it would take far longer for him to make a friend. He has, after all, been alive for a very, very long time. Certainly far longer than you have.

'Maybe,' a tiny voice in your ear whispers, 'Maybe I just need to try harder.'

A renewed sense of determination rises in your gut and your nostrils flare around a deep inhale, but below that, below the sudden drive that lights a fire in your belly, something else begins its arduous crawl to the surface, though you don't notice it yet. Something you've been tragically devoid of ever since the world ended and you were thrust onto this journey you have no desire nor right to be privy to. Looking back, you'd probably wonder how you didn't instantly recognise that first glimmer of courage - a quiet sort of courage, the very beginnings of a roar, but yet so soft and mellow that it barely rings louder than a whisper.

Common sense – a far more insistent presence - screams for you to be reasonable, you've been injured and it's very likely that you will be again if you follow Death out of that gate. However, the image of him crushed against that wall by Karkinos' horn is burned into the forefront of your mind's eye and lurks there, an ugly reminder that even Death himself can be vulnerable, and with that vulnerability comes an aspect of humanity.

Without even meaning to, you've humanised Death.

You square your jaw and try to march up the steps, almost catching up to the Horseman when you're suddenly plucked off your feet and hoisted back, clutched in a familiar fist.

“What the – Karn!” you yelp, battering uselessly on your captor's knuckles, “What're you doing?!”

The maker falters for a fleeting moment, his fingers twitching open by an inch before he summons his resolve and lifts you higher off the ground. You can feel his reluctance though, his hand gripping you gingerly as if he's afraid you'll shatter at any moment. It encourages you to wriggle with more fervor than ever in the hopes that you might slip free and escape.

But it's no use.

You may as well be trying to break out of a concrete cell – though stone might be more easily moved than an overprotective maker.

There's nothing, nothing you can do except to go limp in Karn's hand and stare dejectedly after the Horseman, a strange concoction brewing in your chest that's two parts hurt and two parts furious at him for leaving you behind like your presence has so far meant nothing to him.

Once he reaches the top of the stairs, you blink back a gathered wetness on your lashes and crane your head around, hitting Karn with a look so drenched in betrayal, the maker's immense heart wails.

“Now, now dun' look at me like that!” he whines, turning away from the steps and blocking your view of Death with his bulk. Despite his plea, you subject him to a few more seconds of hard scowling before swivelling your head forwards once more and blowing out a huff.

Karn stops once he deems the distance between you and the village gates is large enough and places you delicately on the ground. The moment his fingers slide off your back, you march several yards away and glare fiercely at the Makers' Forge, willing the entire mountain to crumble if only to alleviate some of the frustration building in your gut.

Behind you, Karn lingers where he came to a stop, tapping the pads of his forefingers together whilst his brain tries to come up with something to say. “Y/n?” he settles for after some hesitation. Staring down at the back of your head, he watches you give it a few, deliberate shakes. Then, you're facing him, your brows tilted up in such a way that feels like a punch to his gut.

“I can't believe you just did that,” you snap.

The maker grimaces, but tries to argue, “Death told me to-”

“I don't care what Death said!” Cutting him off with an exasperated laugh, you throw your hands up and continue, anger blemishing your sentences, “It – it shouldn't be up to Death what I do! It shouldn't be up to you!” Your voice suddenly cracks, yet you press on. “I'm sick of feeling like everything is out of my control! The world ended and I thought I was gonna die! I couldn't – I...I couldn't get home! I couldn't go back for the people in the church and I didn't even get to say goodbye to mum and dad and...and I....” Whatever burst of indignation had suddenly overcome you dies away along with your words and you blink, caught off guard by your own epiphany.

Seconds later, you let out a strangled sound and scrub at your eyes. “Ugh. I hate feeling so useless.” You abruptly turn away from him and look wearily to the forge again. It doesn't take long before Karn's heavy presence sidles up next to you and he falters, eventually sucking in a lungful of air before lowering himself noisily onto the steps beside you. His rucksack clanks and rattles with all the treasures he's stuffed in there.

“I don't think you're useless,” he mumbles and swipes a brusque thumb underneath his nose.

“Well....That makes one of us.”

“....”

“Karn?”

“Mm?”

You shift your gaze sideways and up, your jaw set. “I'm still mad at you.”

He swallows so thickly, you can see his adams apple bob like a fisherman's float. “Aye,” he nods, “S'posin' that's fair.”

There you sit, the oddest pair in the universe – a young maker and the last human – both of your heads resting heavy in your hands as a sigh whispers past your lips in perfect unison. To the right, lava oozes a lazy path into the makers' forge whilst in contrast, the river of crystal-clear tears gurgles by on your left. Neither seem in any particular hurry. They simply plod along as nature decrees, unhindered by such concepts as fear or doubt. They know exactly where they're going, and how to get there. They simply march on. And on and on and on, and those who don't move are removed. And those who won't stand aside are cut through. It may take thousands upon thousands of years for one, or mere minutes for the other, but both the river of fire and the river of water are of the same power. They go where they are needed without fuss or fight. You can't help but to envy them their surety. Sometimes you wish someone would guide you so concisely.

A shift in the air tugs you from your thoughts when the giant sitting next to you finally drops his hands into his lap and eases out a warm chuckle.

Glancing up at him, a question puckering your forehead, you ask, “What's so funny?”

Karn's eyes are swimming with a complex amalgamation of expressions. Amusement, fondness...pride. “Ah, nothin' much,” he huffs through a smile, “S'just, nice seein' your spine, is all.”

“My spine?” More baffled than not, you try to look back over a shoulder before his meaning catches up to you. “Oh.”

“Couple days ago, you were flinchin' from your own shadow, if I remember. Now look at you! Gettin' manhandled by the Horseman and you still call him 'friend' and want to go off lookin' for the Guardian with him. Ye've changed. I-In a good way!” he adds hastily.

Shrugging, you wet your lips and stare at the door ahead of you, anything to avoid his appraising eyes. “I haven't really noticed a difference.”

“I have,” he answers simply and leans his elbows back on the stairs behind him, head tilting to watch the clouds roll by.

You ponder his observation for a moment, then follow his example and look to the sky alongside him. “I guess if there has been a change, I have Death to thank for it.” After a pause, you add softly, “I've got a lot to thank him for, now that I think about it.”

One of your canines digs mercilessly into your lip until it begins to hurt and you're forced to stop, heaving a loud sigh instead. “You know, just because I want to go with him doesn't meant I'm not scared. You roll your gaze away from the maker's face to stare idly at the shiny buckle of his rucksack strap. “To tell you the truth Karn, I'm terrified.”

Wearing a baffled frown, he asks, “Well, why'd you want to go so badly?”

Your mouth opens, shuts, and then your lips part with more care, only just opening wide enough for you to whisper reverently, “Because, he's my friend. I might not be his, but he is mine. Karn, I've lost everything. My home, my friends, my family...I really – like, really – don't want to lose anyone else.”

“You'll struggle to lose the Horseman,” he tries out a laugh, hoping to ease your fears, “He's small, aye, but tougher'n old boots!”

Eventually, you indulge him in a tiny smile. “Yeah, I know. But I still worry.”

Once again, your head finds itself resting on your knuckles as you lean forwards, elbows propped up on your knees. Next to you, the youngling tilts his own head and frowns at your sullen expression and pretends he doesn't envy the Horseman for consuming so much of your attention. But soon, he shakes the thought off and clambers to his feet, hands clapping together with enough force to jumpstart your heart. “Well!” he exclaims, “No point troublin' yerself. Tell you what, why don't we pack up those worries of yours and go do somethin' fun?” As you listen, he becomes more and more animated, his excitement evidenced by the hands that fly about to properly illustrate his ideas. “Maybe I can show you the rest of the village! You haven't even seen our-”

“Wait, what did you say?”

Karn pauses, his hands frozen in the air above his head. “Er....we could...do somethin' fun?”

“No, no. Before that!” Now it's your turn to jump up and stare at the maker, waving a pointed finger up and down at him. “Something about, 'packing up my worries...'”

An idea comes to you, a risky idea, but an idea nonetheless. The trickiest part of which will be convincing Karn to get on board, but you're hoping that without the literal threat of Death staring him down, he'll be more easily swayed.

Bouncing up onto your toes, you look the maker right in his eye and ask, “You and me, we're friends, right?”

The moment your question sinks in, his ears pin back. He appears nervous, tentative that you'll rescind his friendship status at any moment. “Course,” he nods a little too hard, a little too eagerly, “Yeah, o'course we are.”

“Are you sure?” Deep in your soul, you know it's awful and cheap to use manipulation tactics on the youngling, and it does leave a particularly sour taste in your mouth, but you simply don't know how else he'll agree. Folding your arms over one another, you cock a hip and drawl, “You sure weren't acting like it just then. On Earth, friends don't usually keep their other friends prisoner.”

The maker nearly crashes to his knees, pleading, “I-I'm not keepin' you prisoner! I'm keepin' you safe!”

“Same difference! I want to leave, but you're not letting me! How is that not imprisonment?”

“I-...Well, I....” His jaw snaps shut and you can practically see the resolve crumbling off him in chunks.

“Karn, please.”

An enormous fist is clenched at his side, hanging low enough for you to step right up to the maker and plant both of your hands on his knuckle, giving it an impoloring tug for added measure. “I need to get out of this village but I can't do that without your help.” The skin beneath your fingers grows warm and his hand twitches towards you, inadvertently pushing you back half a step. Karn draws his head up to stare at the mountain, at the working Forge who's voice is finally ringing out after so many years of silence. A silence ended, thanks to you and Death.

“Friends help each other,” the youngling breathes, echoing the words you'd spoken earlier before he drops his eyes to you once more, a grimace pulling at the corners of his mouth. A further several seconds drag by in which you remain under the intense scrutiny of that misty-grey gaze, and then, having apparently weighed the loss of a friend against the wrath of a Horseman, Karn makes his decision.

“What's your plan?” he grumbles, ears lain flat against his skull.

In return, you give him the broadest grin your can muster, which makes it very difficult for him to be too disgruntled.

“We-” you drawl suggestively, flicking a thumb between yourself and the increasingly apprehensive maker, “-are going to walk right out of that front gate.”

His sharp bark of surprise comes out as a comical squeak. “Eh!? You want to waltz right by Thane!?” he sputters for a moment before clearing his throat to add, “Trust me, there'll be no convincin' that old crosspatch, he'll never just let you walk! Not after Death told him to make sure you stay put!” He drives his point home by jabbing a meaty finger towards the ground.

In direct contrast to his fretting however, you don't even seem in the least bit concerned and an impish smirk sweeps across your features instead, to which the maker quirks a brow. “What? Whassat look for?”

“How much room have you got in that backpack of yours?” You raise your eyebrows at the object in question.

“Er...” Thrown off by the out-of-nowhere subject change, Karn glances over his shoulder and replies, “Bout enough space for a few more treasures.” He trails to a stop and eyes you suspiciously. “Why?”

“What if one of those treasures was, say...roughly the same size as a human?”

The maker's hand reaches up to scratch at the back of his neck and he blows out his cheeks. “Well, that depends on what it is. If I juggle some things around in the ol' bag, I could prolly squeeze in another trinket or two.”

“...Karn.”

“What?” he asks before finally catching the flat look you're giving him. “Oh.” A slow blink, and then, “Oooh!” Realisation lights up his eyes and they grow round as saucers, even as he takes the straps of his rucksack in hand and works the cumbrous load off his shoulders, plopping it down on the floor next to you and immediately seeing how easily you could slip inside. It towers above you, its shadow engulfing your every inch. The image only reaffirms to Karn just how tiny you really are.

Quick as a flash, you leap up to try and unfasten the top, only to come up about three feet short. Before you can try again, your jumper is pinched between two, thick fingers and you're pulled back, away from the bag to face Karn.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” he frets, glancing over his shoulder to check that Muria and Thane are within neither eye, nor earshot. “Y'know Death won't be too happy when you show up at the temple.”

“He won't hurt me,” you reply with more conviction than you truthfully feel.

“Oh, aye! You'll be fine and dandy!” the maker scoffs, “S'actually me I'm worried about.”

Pausing to give his finger a consoling pat, you pull out of his grip and motion for him to open the lid of his rucksack. “Come on, Karn. What's an adventure without a little peril?”

The grumble that ensues pulls a laugh out of you, albeit a nervous one. You're well aware of the danger that lurks outside that enormous gate. The bruise on your side is testament to it. But whatever has swept in and washed away a part of your fear – however small that piece may be – is at least enough to keep you from changing your mind and staying in Tri Stone. So when Karn flips the lid and tips his bag down, you waste little time scrambling inside, squeezing yourself in amongst the bric-a-brac and trinkets he's stuffed down there. Once you've settled in between a familiar dish and some kind of gigantic, leather gauntlet, you look up through the opening to find Karn peering back at you, a hand scrubbing anxiously at the stubble on his chin. “This'll never work,” he warns in a sing-song voice, “Thane's got a nose for sniffin' out a lie.”

“It'll work. Trust me. Just show no fear, act like you know what you're doing and stroll right on through that door.”

The maker opens his mouth to argue, but soon shuts it again, gulping his words down and finally giving you a reluctant nod. Then, using a single finger, he closes his rucksack back up, plunging you into total darkness. There's a moment of stillness before you suddenly find yourself hoisted off the ground and swung through the air, coming to a jarring halt when your body collides with what you can only assume is a sturdy back, the trinkets around you rattling and clanking noisily as they too are subjected to the same treatment.

The solid surface your feet have been resting on abruptly shifts and you let out a squeal as you plummet a foot or so down further into the bag. Unfortunately, that squeal becomes a hiss after your side is bumped roughly against the rounded edge of Karn's journeyman dish.

“Y'alright?” a muffled whisper-shout reaches you from outside your temporary hiding place.

After taking a second to right yourself again, you reply in hushed tones, “Yeah, you?”

“Oh, sure,” comes his reply before you're promptly shifted again, this time into steady, swaying motions accompanied by the impact of mighty boots hitting stone and rumbling through your chest, letting you know he's on the move. Through the thick canvas of his bag, you hear the maker continue, “I'm right as rain, me. No worries here.” His sarcasm is palpable.

“You can do this, Karn. I believe in you.”

The youngling doesn't reply to your motivational yet concise words. However, you feel it clearly when he draws himself up high, each step he takes from then a little more sure and nimble. Following his example, you fall silent as well.

For several, long seconds, you hear nothing around you except the maker's heavy footfalls and the gentle clinking of metal all around you. But then, as you'd feared it would, Thane's distinctive voice booms out, low and commanding. “PUP!”

Karn freezes and turns slowly turns to face the old warrior, plastering on his most innocent grins. “Oi, Thane! Didn't see you there. How can I help?”

The older maker thumps to a stop before him and eyes the foot Karn has placed on the first step that leads to Tri Stone's gate. His bushy moustache twitches and, in an agonisingly slow fashion, he drags his eyes up to fix the youngling under his stern glare. “Where're you off to in such a hurry?”

“Er, just...goin' to check out the fjord!”

All of a sudden, Karn feels as though someone has painted the word 'liar' right across his forehead. “Now it's clear, I figure s'a good place for some explorin'.”

Thane's expression doesn't budge an inch, though he does glance and the ground near his feet, searching. “And, where's your little friend?”

“She's in the Forge.”

The warrior's eyebrow hikes up his forehead. “Oh? And you're not with her? Thought you said you weren't leavin' her side, 'no matter what?'”

If Karn doesn't end up giving himself away, the pink blush creeping into his cheeks soon will. He'd made the proclamation while you were in Muria's garden, still unconscious. “O-oh! Yeah, I did say that...”

Inside his rucksack, you have your fingers crossed so tightly, any more tension could well snap them off. But just as you're mentally willing him to be a better liar, Karn surprises you by releasing a sigh so soft and forlorn, he gives the impression of a maker far more advanced in years than he is.

“She... don't exactly want t'be round me at the moment.”

Taken aback, Thane blinks, shifting his weight and waiting for the youngling to elaborate. “Turns out she don't appreciate me keepin' her here. Said I was bein' a bad friend, so...So, yeah.” He trails off with a shrug and scratches at his nose, eyes trained on the ground.

Jesus. You're in on the lie and even you feel awful for what you'd supposedly said. Hell, now that you think about it, is that how Karn had interpreted the things you said to him earlier? Sure, you hadn't outright said he was a bad friend but you had insinuated he wasn't behaving as a friend should. 'Ah...Shit.' You wince and absently press a hand flat against the rucksack wall, feeling the solid muscles of Karn's back warm on your skin. They bunch at your touch, relaxing seconds later and you can only hope your apology is conveyed in the simple contact.

Suddenly, you're tugged from your thoughts by Thane, whose gruffness has been all but buried underneath a rare moment of sympathy. Exhaling a rough breath, he claps one, brawny hand on the younger maker's shoulder and gives him a well-intentioned jostle. “Ach, well, I'm...sure she'll come around soon, eh?”

“I hope so.”

Thane presses his lips into a tight grimace and nods awkwardly, patting Karn's back a few more times before he clears his throat and gives the other maker a shove towards the gate. “G'wan then, go take your mind of her for a bit.”

Trying not to let his mouth gape open in disbelief, the youngling tosses his thanks to Thane and makes his escape, feeling the warrior's eyes on him all the way into the tunnel.

It's only once he turns the first corner and breaks Thane's line of sight that Karn releases the lungful of air he's been holding onto and breaks into a lumbering trot, easily traversing his way through the tunnel until eventually, he steps out into the sunshine on the other side. Trembling with the adrenaline of disobeying his elders so brazenly, he has to take a minute to collect himself, breathing in the crisp air of the vale and feeling the wind on his face before he reaches back and carefully removes his rucksack.

Light floods your cramped hidey-hole and you briefly shy away from it, having to shield your eyes until a large shadow falls across the opening and you squint up into the face of a stupefied maker. His grin is slight and he emits a bewlidered laugh as he reaches inside the rucksack and scoops you out. “I can't believe that worked!”

Sliding comfortably into the centre of his palm with your legs dangling over the side, you return the laugh and reply, “What did I tell you? You're a natural!” You fall silent, losing your smile and looking down at your hands. “A little too natural if you ask me.”

“Karn...What I said back in Tri Stone, about you not acting like a friend-”

“Ach! Weren't nothin' by it!” he dismisses with a chuckle that doesn't quite sound genuine, “You were right, friends shouldn't be holdin' each other back like that! S'pose I'm just out of practice is all. S'been a while since I've had a real friend.”

“Surely the other makers....” you begin, but Karn is already shaking his head.

“Eh, they're more family than anythin' else,” he explains brightly, “But family don't always get along, you know?”

Guilt makes itself at home in your gut like a malevolent parasite. Your friendship obviously means more to him than you realised. Regarding the youngling with a newfound understanding, you nod slowly. “Yeah....Yeah, I get you.” Then, “Karn?”

“Yeah, what?” he replies, lifting you up and depositing you on his broad shoulder amidst the tangle of his warm, wooly scarf.

“You are a good friend.” It hardly feels like enough from where you're sitting, but judging by the toothy grin that breaks across his features and lifts his cheeks, it's at least enough for him. You allow a few more moments for him to sheepishly scratch at his neck with his unoccupied hand before you lean forwards and raise a brow at him.

“Um, I can walk you know.”

“Wha? Oh, I know!” he says a little too quickly, “Just thought it'd be faster this way.”

You give him a suspicious hum but ultimately drop the matter, unwilling to argue. After all, he does have a point. And it wouldn't exactly do to arrive at the temple already exhausted from jogging all the way there, trying to match the maker's enormous strides.

So, drawing in a breath too deep to allow room for trepidation in your lungs, you wrap a hand up in Karn's scarf and the two of you set off towards Baneswood, both safe in the knowledge that, no matter what happens next, neither of you will be facing it alone.

#Darksiders #Darksiders 2 #Imagine Darksiders #chwh #cold hands warm heart #Karn #found family #friendship #hurt/comfort #whump #fluff #angst #panic attack #anxiety

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danwhobrowses · 3 years

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WWE Wrestlemania 37 Day 1 - Review

Big Card, Not so big build

But it is that time of the year, we Stood, we Delivered, and now we shall Showcase for the Grandest Stage of them All

I got hyped for it by watching Bret vs Owen so I do have expectations, I haven't been spoiled too much save for the Main Event and the fact that there was storms that delayed the event, I dunno if they cut that content but we shall see Note: I am gonna bold who I predicted to win per match as well just to show how right/wrong I was

Spoilers for Wrestlemania Night 1, You Have Been Warned

Pre-Show The opening panel was not so great; Booker (with a captain Hook moustache), JBL, Lawler and Rosenberg, bunch of contrarian drivel really and trying to make Braun/Shane out like it deserves on the card just doesn't sit with me, that match robbed a potential Father/Son Tag Title Victory for the Mysterios (I know the Dirty Dawgs won on SD but I feel like they wouldn't have retained if it were Mania). Most of the promo packages were good at the least since they can cut out all the shoddy booking decisions and act like some stars were underbooked over the past year. I will say though, selling BelAir and Banks as 'the first time a women's singles match has main evented Wrestlemania' is a bit of a slight on the triple threat - which would've been 1v1 if Vinny didn't want to be adamant in adding more feathers to Charlotte's peahen plumage - it was still a singles match, sometimes WWE's desire for 'first time evers' are a bit insufferable. Also this is not 'the most important match of Cesaro's career', that is a terrible thing to say about a non-title match revolving around Rollins feeling embarrassed. The Hall of Fame recap was a mixed bag as well, mainly because I disagreed with some of the inductions and the way they tried to sell them bigger than what they are, but I was glad for some - Liger, Bulldog, Molly Holly, Kane...still waiting on Lillian and Andy Kaufman to get inducted though. Sonya also popped up to promote the tag turmoil and retreading the main event, she was super natural and should've been on the whole panel, or in the ring. Sonya's talents are wasted right now.

No Match though! An Hour of Recap lacked any entertainment seeing as we'd see all these promo packages again on the main card. So overall this was entirely skippable.

Main Card...Delayed Vince opened the event to address the crowd, which was kinda nice actually. It was a much more inclusive introduction than just having someone singing America the Beautifu-oh they're still doing tha-boooooooobs! It's also kinda weird looking at the roster not even on the card on the stage, like this is their only contribution for the entire year...

The intro package was a big obnoxious too, dude does an okay Jack Sparrow accent but it kinda went on a bit long, 10 minutes into the main show and there's no wrestling y'know?

Byron out with a super white suit as well, looking like Liberace as weather warnings echoed the arena, with news that it'll be worse tomorrow I hope that arena has a roof. With the delay WWE pulled with interviews, Big E even showed up to join his New Day buddies. Cole's 'Wrestlerainia' did not land and Braun saying 'I'm fighting for everyone whose been bullied' doesn't land either, we had this story with Nia and Alexa years ago. I also hate 'Herstory', like the literal word I hate it, History has adapted well beyond gender. Sure, it evolved from the Greek Histor which means 'wise' or 'a learned man' but the His is not the agent noun, the Tor is, and it's a gender neutral noun, if it were a Latin root then it'd be masculine but its root is Ancient Greek - there's your Etymology lesson for tonight.

The irony though, the moment fans get back in the arena they have to come back out because of rain.

Main Card - This Time Around Titus and Hulk came out as hosts to ramp up the crowd, it was kinda uncomfortable in context really, plus we don't need a third rundown of the card. Reminder that those in bold was who I earlier predicted to win.

WWE Championship - Bobby Lashley [w/MVP] (c) def. Drew McIntyre (Ref Stoppage Submission via Hurt Lock) Starting hot with the World title match again, bit odd to see Lashley do his point pose on the ramp and no pyro, but both men fixed their eyes on each other and barely looked away. Their history goes beyond WWE after all, not that the commentary would tell you. The did come out with a ton of falsities though, I know the WWE Championship was at several times the most prestigious belt in wrestling but not all the time in that 60 years, Big Gold Belt, IWGP and 10 Pounds of Gold had times too, AEW also can tout that, but Cole's most baffling claim was that you'd need to win it to be a Hall of Famer - on the same year Bulldog who never won a world title was inducted. No quick draw like last year, the match started with some meat slapping, Drew even gesturing a fuck you with the Bras d'honneur to Lashley after knocking him down. Both men would trade blows and advantage, Drew almost locking an armbreaker but Lashley clubbing free - very weird camera cutting there. Lashley hit 2 throws and a neckbreaker to regain the advantage, he didn't get the Futureshock but he hit a nice Northern Lights Suplex. Lashley hit his newer version of the Dominator and an Uranage but both only kept Drew down for 2, he almost got the Hurt Lock as Drew fought back with some blows and a front-facing Alabama Slam, he tried a superplex but Lashley fought out, tried a kimura but got knocked down, so he went for the Tree of Woe throw he does. Lashley gets him with another Uranage but Drew kips up, belly to belly, Futureshock, Futureshock, Futureshock! 1, 2, No! Drew calls for the Claymore but Lashley rolls out, MVP coming late, Drew then does a Tope onto both. He goes up top but almost gets caught with the Hurt Lock, an Exploder and a Flatliner puts Lashley in the driver's seat, he tries for the Hurt Lock again but is driven into the Turnbuckle, Drew then locks in the Kimura but Lashley gets to the ropes. After trading shots Lashley lands into a boot and a headbutt, Drew looks for the Claymore but MVP shouts to distract him, allowing Lashley to dodge and get the Hurt Lock in, Drew tried to fight back, tried to roll out of it by kicking the turnbuckle but Lashley cinched it in tight, fading, fading, and the ref calls the bell.

A very good opener this one, big men slapping meat can hardly go wrong. Not too many false finishes either and MVP only psyches Drew out rather than got fully involved. It was right for Drew to fade rather than tap too. First prediction wins, I did think it was a risk but I expected it because WWE had sold the idea that they wanted Drew to win in front of a crowd, but he had held the title for most of the year, so I anticipated the swerve. Still, we didn't have to break up the Hurt Business for this, hopefully Lashley gets more time to shine.

As Lashley celebrated with some strange camera switching we moved to Titus, the NWO and a Bayley segment. Bayley trying to sell her Ding Dong Hello and being denied some Two Sweets, a huge waste of Bayley's talents especially with the year she has had.

Tag Team Turmoil for a shot at the WWE Women's Tag Championship on Night 2 - Natalya & Tamina def. Naomi & Lana, the Riott Squad [Liv Morgan & Ruby Riott], Billie Kay & Carmella and Dana Brooke & Mandy Rose (pinfall by Tamina on Ruby Riott via Superfly Splash) Props to Billie Kay selling the lack of cohesion in her and Carmella's entrance as they started the match against Lana & Naomi. Naomi started with the advantage but it was traded to Carmella when Lana was tagged in, then to Billie, then back to Naomi. A double facebuster flattens Billie but Carmella breaks the pin, after Carmella throws Lana out Billie rolls up Naomi - who is also strengthened by Carmella lying on the floor but using her feet to keep Billie up right - for 3, eliminating that team. Naomi is not happy, as she should be that was a huge waste, as the Riott Squad come in. Sporting Suicide Squad Joker (Ruby) & Harley (Liv) outfits, the Riott Squad start hot but are foiled by Carmella's tag. Liv is the feeder to Carmella and Billie's combos, they try the same rollup trick but they are caught by the ref, Carmella's dumped allowing Liv to hit a codebreaker and hold Billie down for Ruby's senton for the 3, the two embrace but Carmella superkicks Liv as Dana & Manda arrive in pink, Mandy humorously slipping on the ramp did not go unmissed. With Liv taken out Ruby tried to fight alone, Dana hits a top rope blockbuster but Liv comes back to break the pin. Dana hits a spinning neckbreaker and tags Mandy in, a pin for 2 by Ruby opens the door for Liv to be tagged in, a Codebreaker/Riott Kick combo lands but the pin is broken by Dana. Cole accidentally calls Mandy 'Dana' as she rallies, Dana comes back to dump Ruby out as they land the Superplex/Swanton combo on Liv, Mandy pulls Ruby from making the save but Liv reverses the pin for 3. The announcer then wrongly says that the Riott Squad were eliminated and has to be corrected, making you think this wasn't the plan. Natalya and Tamina pick up the scraps, Natalya tries a Sharpshooter but gets rolled up for 2, she drops Liv onto the ropes and tags Tamina in. Natalya hits a powerbomb but Ruby breaks the pin before being dumped out by Tamina again. Liv fights both women enough for Ruby to tag in, an assisted spear on Tamina leads to the Codebreaker/Senton combo but it hits for 2. They set up the Codebreaker/Riott Kick but Tamina yanks Riott away and superkicks Liv. Natalya returns to hit the Hart Attack on Ruby, looks to set up the Sharpshooter but instead tells Tamina to take point, Superfly Splash gets the win. The champions look on on a monitor at their opponents.

A bit of a mixed bag this one, the wrestling was clean but I think external botching brought it down, as well as questionable booking decisions. Naomi is a multi-time champion she should not be pinned so quickly. I did again correctly predict Nattie and Tamina, but I personally wanted the Riott Squad to win, it was the Heyman dressing down that motivated me to pick the Daughter Combo - also weird that they acknowledge Tamina's heritage given what Superfly did. The Riotts at least got a great showing, the finish took a bit of a long time considering that all Liv took from them was a superkick and was out for 2 minutes, hopefully this'll inspire booking to push them which is well overdue. As for Tamina and Natalya, heel vs heel is a tough one, they didn't look like babyfaces here and while I do have them to win the titles this was not a good look for their chances.

Cesaro def. Seth Rollins (pinfall via Neutralizer) Seth entered the ring with a homage to the Andre OBEY print on his tights, followed by his Cesaro smear ad, then Cesaro in a weird choice of just a black jacket as well as black and yellow tights similar to his Wrestlemania XXX attire.

Cesaro starts with a huge uppercut and setting up the Swing, but Seth wriggles out, tries a big boot but Cesaro hits the Dragon Screw and tries for the swing again, but fails again. Cesaro gets a corkscrew springboard uppercut but Seth hurts his arm on the ropes, he gets an uppercut as Seth climbs on the turnbuckle but he kinda didn't get all of it. Going for an Avalanche Gutwrench Suplex, Seth rolls out into a Buckle Bomb for 2, Seth then preys on the arm, Cesaro's arm prevents a rally as Seth hits the Superplex/Falcon Arrow combo for 2. Cesaro flurries with uppercuts, he tries the swing but Rollins keeps countering, first a rollup then going to ropes followed by an Enzugiri, when he tries the Stomp though Cesaro gets the swing, 9 spins causes the arm to give way but he locks in the Sharpshooter (probably why Natalya couldn't/wouldn't do it last match), Rollins gets to the ropes and powers out of the Neutralizer, knee strike and a sling blade sets up for a Corkscrew Frog Splash for 2. Seth sets up the Ripcord Knee but gets lifted into a Neutralizer! 1, 2, No! (Commentary saying again 'and now Cesaro begins to doubt himself), Cesaro tries it again but lands into a Pedigree! 1, 2, No!

Seth gloats surviving both of Cesaro's big moves, clubbing the back of Cesaro's head with his hand and then his leg as he prepares a stomp, Cesaro then hits the uppercut, UFO! Gestures for the Swing and gets it! 23 Rotations, Neutralizer, 3!

That's what I'm talking about! Indy Darling match with some great spots, good crowd involvement and a proper babyface win. Cesaro thanks the crowd as they cheer him on, Seth did show some great creativity which I kinda hoped Cesaro would but it was a small thing in otherwise a great match. I guessed with my heart on this one unlike the Tag Team Turmoil, because of my Universal Title plans really, Cesaro has been given the chance to earn the push we all know he deserves and he's took it, now we can push him further.

Post-match they recapped the AMBR and 4-Way, bit off to say 'Veteran Experience pays off' when Rey was the most experienced of them all, also the 4-Way should've been on the mania card and the tag turmoil on SD. They interviewed the Dirty Dawgs to talk the Raw Tag titles, which was a bit rough to see, it's clear what the pecking order is in Vince's mind.

Raw Tag Championships - AJ Styles & Omos def. New Day [Xavier Woods & Kofi Kingston] (c) (pinfall by Omos on Kofi via Double-Handed Chokeslam TITLE CHANGE) Annoyingly the Champions came out first, but they were introduced by Big E, a Fusion Dance hologram graphic paired with their entrance as they came out in Red to rep the Tampa Bay Bucs in what would've been their 2020 attire, cheekily the 2020's last 0 was scribbled out and a 1 added. Blue trumpet though, couldn't recolour that. AJ and Omos came together too but no matching attire, Omos looked like he was going for dinner. AJ also looked like he stumbled a bit at the start.

Kofi goaded AJ into starting the match rather than Omos, leading to some liquid sequences from both former WWE Champions, each respectively rolling out of an SOS and Calf Crusher. After a back body drop Kofi stared down an unimpressed Omos, then twerked which hurt my soul. Kinda heelishly, Xavier tripped up AJ when a throat chop gave him a reprieve, leading to them keeping AJ in the corner, including the Unicorn Stomp as Omos continued to look unimpressed. Against Xavier AJ tried to drag him to his corner, but cannot get to Omos' halfhearted reaching. A team bulldog only gets 1 though. Kofi then continues to block the corner so AJ goes out of the ring to run around, only to be intercepted by Xavier. AJ continues to try and get to Omos, even being flattened by a splash by Kofi, when setting up their finisher though AJ elbows Kofi away, a visual exchange between the now free AJ and the top-turnbuckle Xavier preludes AJ finally tagging in Omos, Xavier frightened as Omos finally has a smile on his face. The 7'3 giant no sells Xavier's and Kofi's offense, charging into both on either turnbuckle, then a backbreaker to both. AJ then jumped over Omos to hit the Phenomenal Forearm to deal with Woods, Omos hit a two-handed chokeslam then pinned Kofi with one foot for the titles.

I didn't like this match's narrative, the wrestling was fine but the story wasn't done so well. For one, New Day acted more like the heels by bullying AJ and keeping him cornered, for second, Omos didn't really 'wrestle' he just no sold and did 3 safe moves and third, New Day are 11 time tag champions, Kofi a former world champion and they pinned him like that. Disrespect. The fact that the SD Tag Titles are second fiddle to a match where it's just AJ Styles plus the Great Khali, and that's Raw's Division right now, Two Thirds of New Day and this mismatch. This only highlights the severe lack of depth and WWE's booking hypocrisy. Next time you read about a 5 foot something wrestler not getting a title or a push because they're 'too green' or 'can't talk' remember that Omos won the tag titles on his debut match after doing a backbreaker, a turnbuckle tackle and a double handed chokeslam.

Humorous though is that WWE cut to a cringy Corbin ad break just as AJ was falling off of Omos' shoulders, I saw that WWE. We also cut to Sasha preparing for the match as the cage began to lower.

Steel Cage Match - Braun Strowman def. Shane McMahon (pinfall via Running Powerslam) The apathy for this match remains high considering that Shane showed up a couple months ago to steal a card slot from someone who could've been wrestling all year. Shane enters in his usual way, Braun with blinding fog and a train sound effect, cringy commentary as well as Shane keeps the door shut. Elias and Ryker soften Braun with chairs, attacking the legs and gifting Shane a chair who unloads on his grounded opponent. Once he feels he's done enough he tries to leave by the door, but Braun pulls him away, he tries to climb over the cage but gets pulled away, Braun declaring that he won't escape. Shane does his tacky jabs dodging Braun's wide swings, he tries to climb out again but Braun grabs him, but there's a planted piece of sheet metal that he uses as a weapon. After a 1 count Shane tried to escape through the door but fails, Braun decides to throw Shane into the cage walls, opening Shane to be struck by his blows and sandwiched between the cage walls, the leg gives out before the powerslam allowing Shane to ram Braun into the cage wall and DDT him, Coast to Coast gets 2 and Elias and Ryker climb the cage, hoping to pull Shane over, but Braun tackles the cage wall to knock everyone off. Shane makes the climb again but Braun is gripping onto him, bags are planted on the corners of the cage as Shane cracks Braun with a toolbox, as Shane celebrates he gets his leg over, he waves his hand through the cage at Braun but he grabs it, peeling off the cage wall to pull Shane back inside. Braun considers leaving but pulls Shane to the top of the cage, throwing Shane to the ring floor. Braun shouts at Shane, hits the running powerslam for 3.

It's good to be wrong here, though when I predicted Shane to win it was more a Pyrrhic win like being sent through a cage wall - because the build had Braun foolishly act like cage matches never have interference. This was a match, Shane planting weapons and using Elias and Ryker to prove himself 'smart' and Braun just powers out of it, the ripping the cage wall to drag Shane back in was a good spot - if not overly convenient since Shane could've dropped and gloated after - but it didn't need to be Wrestlemania.

Bayley comes back this time to the announcers table, bullying Cole out of his seat, but she's made to look stupid since Byron of all people tell her that they're waiting for the Hall of Famers, the HOF package happens again and the inductees able to attend appear on the stage, graphics of those who couldn't on the screen, NWO get their own entrance though with the NWO-painted Big Gold belt, bit unnecessary really they have enough spotlight.

Stone Cold announces the next mania in Texas in the AT&T Stadium, Booker then joins the announcer's table.

Bad Bunny & Damian Priest def. Miz and John Morrison (Pinfall by Bad Bunny on Miz via Crossbody/Electric Chair combo) A bunch of men dressed as bunnies hop into the ring before Miz and Morrison lipsync their diss track entrance. After the promo package Damian Priest makes his entrance, wearing the HBK Bondage shirt and sporting the purple, Bad Bunny appears atop of a Monster Truck in a pre-recorded segment with a lot of camera cuts, leading into the live version, looking like Rufus from Bill and Ted.

Miz and Morrison goad Bad Bunny to start the match so Priest tags him in, Miz mocks Bunny for a free shot and gets floored with a blow, waistlock and another punch, after a brief flurry Miz slows Bunny down but then gets caught with an arm drag, a toehold and a roll up for 2. Morrison attempts to snap Miz out of his frustration, but every offense he gets Bad Bunny comes back, this time with a spinning headscissors. Morrison's tagged in but gets headbutted, a 'bunny hop' jumping elbow, Miz's cheap shot leads to some heat feeding as Miz does some mocking bunny hops. He rolls over Miz for 2 but gets flattened with a boot, Morrison punishes Bunny on the announcer's table who then does a Spinaroonie while they continue to punish Bunny and incite Priest. Bunny gets a tornado DDT to open up the Hot Tag who cleans up house with strikes - more annoying camera cuts though. Chokeslam only gets 2 because Morrison breaks the count, Bunny comes in and both men hit stereo Falcon Arrows, both for 2, Priest does a tope, Bunny crossbodies from the top corner. Priest sets up his finish but gets caught with a Skull Crushing Finale, 1, 2, Bunny breaks the pin. Back into his corner Morrison tries to keep Bunny from being tagged, but Bunny hits a Canadian Destroyer onto Morrison on the outside of the ring, Miz and Priest awestruck. Priest sets up the Electric Chair, Bunny crossbodies and that's 3.

I may not know who Bad Bunny is, or particularly like his music, but he definitely meets the standards of the work celebrity guests should put in if they wanna be booked for a match. Bad Bunny did far much more spots than Omos, granted his punches flooring Miz was a bit unbelievable but overall he shone in an entertaining match, I feel bad for Miz and Morrison really, Miz was WWE champion about a month ago for a week and Morrison left at the top of Impact and AAA to come back for this? Maybe if he pairs up with his wife he'll get the booking he deserves. Also don't really know why Booker needed to be there on the announcer's table, aside from one mock spot and a GI Bro mention he didn't influence the match at all

SD Women's Championship - Bianca BelAir def. Sasha Banks (c) (Pinfall via KOD TITLE CHANGE!) And so comes the Main Event, the Royal Rumble winner comes out a sparkly EST outfit with tassels, Sasha with a black and neon green attire that definitely stood out. More shoddy camera cutting though kinda upset the flow of the entrance.

On Pre-Show - 'These two are in the Main Event regardless of Race, Regardless of Gender' On Main Event - 'For the first time two black women are having a title match on the main event at Wrestlemania' ...poor form WWE. Especially since you followed this with a Snickers plug.

The Bell rings as there are close ups on an emotional Bianca, duelling chants from the crowd as Sasha overpowers BelAir, leading her to kip up and get her own advantage, almost landing the KOD early. BelAir's power catches most of Banks' assault so she opts for counter-wrestling, she looks to count BelAir out but then decides for a Suicide Dive, but BelAir catches her and presses her back up the stairs and into the ring. Dropkick by Sasha gets 2, Bianca hits a powerslam but her handspring moonsault is blocked by Sasha yanking at the hair, using it as leverage to drive her knee into BelAir's head, Shining Wizard only gets 2. When Banks tries the knees in the corner she's planted with an Uranage, she tries to yank Bianca's hair into the corner post but Bianca powers her into it instead, a barricade crossbody also misses but the count is up to 6, both women roll in, BelAir uses an inside cradle to momentum herself up to a Vertical Suplex position, she slingshots 2 of the sides but Banks struggles, Bianca powers her back up but Sasha struggles again, BelAir powers again and lands the suplex but it takes a lot out of her. After clotheslining Sasha who was pulling on her hair, BelAir flurries with strikes and a running shooting star, Glam Slam hits but Sasha gets the knees up for the 450. The two trade pins and BelAir hits the Powerbomb for 2, she tries again but Sasha goes for a facebuster, Double Rotation Tornado DDT gets 2 for Sasha, a clunky Frog Splash which might've been a Meteora that Bianca was out of position for hits BelAir but only has 2, Sasha starts getting frustrated and goes for the arm, snaps it against the ropes then throws BelAir into the steps, she goes for the Bank Statement, wrapping Bianca's hair around her arm for added leverage, she tries to rebound off the ropes but Bianca rolls back to rope break, Sasha yanks the hair between the rope and stomps on her hair in frustration but this gets Bianca angry, she sets up a Superplex but is thrown off, she tries what looks like a Stratusfaction but gets locked into a Tree of Woe double stomp, Bianca avoids it and the running knee strike, landing the 450! 1, 2, No! Bianca freaks out, she was so sure that was it, but now the anger sets in, KOD set up but Sasha pulls the hair to right herself, Bianca cracks Sasha with her hair and tries again, but Sasha wriggles to try a Backstabber, Bianca escapes that, spins her around and lands the KOD, 1, 2, E.S.T.

A really good match from both women, met with a great ovation for Bianca. The match liked to prey on Bianca's hair a lot which may've been a little overdone, I would've liked to have seen it get a bit more than 18 minutes too. I predicted Sasha because I think Rhea's winning hers (I still do) and Sasha has once again yet to have a major Wrestlemania win, but I'm certainly not unhappy with BelAir - she put on a great performance here, especially with the fact that she fumbled her NXT Women's Title match against Baszler earlier, showing a lot more maturity and a strong face character to get behind. WWE should not have overdid the booking on this in the build but for the night, it is Bianca's night to close day one of WrESTlemania.

Conclusion NXT Stand and Deliver set a high bar for Wrestlemania to pull off, and for Night 1 at least I believe they definitely met it. There were a few downs, shoddy camerawork, non-wrestling botching and heavy mistreatment for Naomi, Bayley and the New Day but on the other hand we had great matches out of Cesaro, Bad Bunny and the other title matches including the main event, aside from the tag turmoil I'm not upset with the winners. Becky teased us with appearing before the show but it seems like it was a fakeout, was kinda hoping she'd be back but maybe it'll be Night 2

We will only find out on the night though, and there's a lot more to look forward to.

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shidoukanae · 4 years

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YGO! Questionnaire

Tagged by @cipher-wise

Favorite series:

My favorite series based on what I watched and enjoyed would have to be Arc-V!!! It's honestly the series that got me to adore YGO when previously I'd seen YGO as, and I chilidishly quote, "uncool". Everything about Arc-V is pretty much wonderful: Yuya's presence as a "everyone MUST be happy" kind of character in a plot that discusses themes of war, revenge, and despair is absolutely refreshing (especially when Yuya's ideals of happiness are stripped from him and made a mockery of by, *coughs* one of my favorite characters in the franchise *coughs*).

I love how the four Yuu boys are a wonderful combination of "protagonists" (/anatagonists) and how they each play off of each other's weaknesses and strengths, often acting as mirrors to each other in their individual dimensions while having amazing interactions (Yugo and Yuri, anyone? Yuri and Yuya?).

I admire how the endgame plot is a perversion of Yuya's ideals: he gets what he wants, showering happiness upon all, but that "happiness" is corrupted into the notion of entertainment. While Yuya seeks to provide people with smiles and laughter, to give them hope to work together through tough times and to stay strong in the face of adversity, his "counterparts" in the endgame are really good at acting as Yuya's mirror: showing that his style of performing can also be used to appease the bloodthirst of one's own self and that happiness can be corrupted into self-deserving power.

...Hard to put that into exact words without spoiling a lot of things but, gosh, let's just say that Yuri and ____ are the perfect mirrors to Yuya in terms of what his entertainment dueling style is meant to be.

The plot over all is pretty good! I won't lie and say it stands strong all the way throughout the story but the first half is amazing and there are some pretty strong episodes in the second half (Yugo and Rin, the parasite episodes in general, Yuri Yuri YURI). I can definitely say that the humor is there, the characters are amazing (if nothing else, watch for the Yuu Boys, the Bracelet Gals, and Shun versus Sora!!) and having come into the show around episode 104, I was pleasantly surprised by the trip Arc-V brought me and how it played with its protagonist, giving him hope, kicking him down, and toying with his mind - just like the way a warzone might to any idealistic individual.

In terms of other series, I like VRAINS but only up to like episode 19 (or the end of the Data Bank arc). It had potential and I kept hoping it would get better but the plot was constantly floundering, there are plot holes abundant (sewer monsters, ugh), character development is inconsistent not to mention very shallow, VRAINS has some of the best side characters but they're kicked to the curb by a bland protagonist and a villain that could've been so much cooler but they made him a sympathetic mess.

...I have a lot of gripes with VRAINS but, if it were to ever be rewritten with clear goalposts and plot twists in mind (not to mention development on ideas like Charisma Duelists because at the end of the show I still have not a fucking clue what a Charisma Duelists is or was) I would say it has potential to become my favorite series but Arc-V clearly beats it for me in every category lmao.

Zexal’s also really good too!!! I don’t get all the hate behind it because it’s actually really interesting and engaging (also IV’s definition of fanservice is literally the only type of fanservice I will ever accept) and I think I’ve even cried a couple of times during the course of the plot which is like,,, shocking considering it’s not a show I thought I’d cry over (I cried in Arc-V too but goddamn does tiny Yuya just want to make you tear up lmao). This show is really good emotionally and it’s literally so stupid how Kaito carries a lot of the early and middle game of the show yet most of the meat of the plot doesn’t begin to unravel until the second season.

Also, if you ever want to watch a show of 100+ episodes that is so masterfully written that there is foreshadowing for stuff in like episode 130+ on EPISODE ONE, please watch this. Literally there are so many hints of what is going to happen in the future in the early episodes and you won’t really be able to tell what those hints are until you’ve finished the show but goddamn when you go back and rewatch things it does indeed feel amazing how much foreshadowing they threaded into the show without you ever knowing...(please don’t search for spoilers if you intend to watch this. I went into the show knowing some spoilers tho not all and, while I was still pleased by what I watched, I honestly can agree the show is A Lot Better without knowing ANYTHING)

Favorite Protagonist: Yuya. For sure, out of all the series, Yuya.

He’s a refreshing protagonist, especially considering he shines in a world of war and despair. He’s also someone who you empathize with right at the start and want to hope in, especially since he is the “happiness” in a word of “madness” and “sorrow”. He’s not someone out to save the world (not really, anyways), but his actions touch on the lives of others anyways, giving people in a hope in a world that is otherwise cruel and heartless. Also, it really helps that he’s able to pull you into his world of “egaos”, making you believe in him and root for him despite how cheesy his ideals may or may not sound.

Also love how, despite being the centerpiece of “happiness”, Yuya isn’t allowed to always be happy :> Not spoiling plot related things but if you like protagonists going off the rails insane at times, Yuya’s definitely a fun protagonist for that!!!

Favorite Rival:

Kaito Tenjou!!! Literally the best rival in the series that I’ve seen. Everything about him is literally perfect ngl. From the way he’s chillingly introduced, with the spine-tingling whistles and cruel, almost merciless nature, to the way he slowly becomes sympathetic while also remaining a terrifying presence whenever he appears...I love him????

Favorite BFF:

Does Shoichi count? Because like...he’s Yusaku’s closest friend and ally in the series and I generally don’t pay attention to the other BFF’s in the other series (or at least, the ones I can recall bc I know in Zexal that Yuma has a whole group of friends lmao).

But I like Shoichi!! He cares about Yusaku a lot, is pretty damn cool as a sidekick hacker, his sideplot with his brother was actually honestly endearing and I loved the mystery about him. His early-game jokes w/ Ai to tease Yusaku were also a good laugh.

Favorite GFF:

Not a girl friend forever for the main protagonist (although she like...lowkey confessed to him...though that plot really never went anywhere so I still don’t know what the fuck THAT was about) but,,, Ema Bessho,,

If y’all knew me back in my peak YGO days when VRAINS was airing,,, this gal was and STILL is my favorite girl of the YGO series. Even though she was pretty much done dirty imo I still love her (even despite considering she’s been made a damsel-in-distress at least three times, she’s only ever won one duel on-screen despite being supposedly good at dueling, ngl they could’ve done so much more with her but tbh she’s mostly just an asset to solve problems at whim and barely gets character development/does nothing but watch and spectate stuff late-game).

Even though she’s like...the unfortunate side character who’s probably meant to be more fanservice than interesting, in the first 19 episodes (and even the Revolver vs. her fight as well as the one time she meets Aoi IRL early-game) made her out to be a lot cooler and complex than she ended up being. I mean,,, a hacker gal who’s self-serving, cynical, and cold-hearted taking on the tasks of her (potentially ex) boyfriend while being really nice to his sister to the point she baffles even herself,,, we could’ve had a really unique and cool character to play around with here but instead we got...cool-ass character with potential to be something more reduced to a spectator with nothing better to do than idolize the main protagonist and have a plot with her brother that honestly detracted from her character more than it added to it imo.

Also Ema could’ve been a female Yuri but,,, nope,,, they decided she was better as a background piece instead TwT

Favorite Villain: Yuri.

Literally Yuri.

I could choose the leather jacket w/ fluff boi in a certain series because hot damn was that guy convincing AF that he wasn’t an evil psychopath (and even while knowing that he was, I still got fooled into thinking he was a good guy somehow omg) however,,, I’ve always held a love for Yuri and the way he’s been portrayed.

Despite ALWAYS being the bad guy, the show has always made this purple fucker into the most entertaining character on-screen. He even beats Yuya sometimes in terms of how entertaining he is - that’s literally how good he is,,

Also his facial expressions are amazing, he’s a VERY VALID threat to the main cast (and his creeper levels are not only off the charts but literally called out by the main female protagonist herself lmao), and he acts as the perfect foil to Yuya, battling not to entertain others but to entertain himself.

Also, he likes killing people.

No this is not a joke.

He literally likes killing people. And is pretty sadistic about it, too.

(^^^^ for those who don’t get the joke, “Fusion” is pronounced “Yuugo” which sounds similar to “Yugo” which is what,,, Yuri is making fun of,,, more context is needed of course but this is a Great Running Gag)

Favorite card:

I don’t know if it actually exists as an actual card but...that crystal dragon from the YGO movie with the glass pyramid. Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon...it’s really pretty...I love it...

Favorite Episode:

I’m...too lazy to search for names of these episodes but I can give brief summaries of them,,, because I can’t choose,,,

Arc-V: Shun vs. Sora (ALL episodes). Hot damn if you have never watched YGO but want to try and see for yourself why people like it: WATCH THESE EPISODES. I can’t explain how amazing these episodes are and, while I admit jumping straight into them might have you missing out on some important context (such as who Shun is or why Sora’s battle tactics lead to revelation) it’s honestly an amazing fight regardless. The battle starts off plain enough - there’s obvious tension, it seems like a typical fight of a battle royale, etc. - my god does the battle ramp up in emotional tension and promptly kick you in the gut with not only how blindsided you’ve been, but it also showcases just how cruel these “entertainment duels” can really get.

Any episode with Yuri. Literally any episode he’s in.

I think this is like...episode 8 of VRAINS...but whenever it is that Akira hires Ema to find the reason why Aoi just...straight up got knocked into a coma. Literally this is my favorite episode when it comes to Ema. The way she makes fun of Akira even while aware of his situation,,, her cruel selfishness and desire for money bubbling to the surface, the way she confesses how she can’t be trusted willingly and still asks Akira why he’s hiring her,,, god I love this episode in terms of what Ema could’ve always been.

Episode 13 (/14?) of Zexal!!! This is the episode Kaito appears and when the show REALLY picks up. Kaito is a fun bastard of a rival and tbh I don’t think I’ll ever stop getting chills of him walking in, debris frozen in time all around him, as he approaches his victim, whistling an eerie children’s tune as he gets ready to close in for the kill,,,,

Favorite Deck to Use:

I don’t...really play the game itself but...I have used a couple of decks and I guess you can say I really love Raid Raptors??? First of all, those warbirds make really fun sounds I love ‘em in the anime but they’re also just fun to use in general (even tho I used a,,, very basic deck for them,,, I love them still).

Fusion, Ritual, Synchro, XYZ, Pendulum or Link:

XYZ bc it’s really the only summoning method I’m used to lol :P. Also XYZ loyalist I guess????

Years in fandom: roughly five to six years iirc? I mean, I was a fan of the early day YGO and watched it as a kid but not active enough to be in the fandom for it lmao. Also not in the fandom atm because Sevens lost my attention (it’s a good show!!! I’m just unfortunately more a fan of things with serious plots and darker themes and it’s hard for me to stomach slice-of-life shows that don’t focus on a mature and engaging plot). However, Arc-V and Zexal holds a special place in my heart (as does VRAINS, begrudgingly) and so I occasionally find myself wandering back to these shows like right now,,,

#yugioh #Arc-v #Zexal #honestly Arc-V feels like the type of show beginners should watch if they want to get into YGO #granted it might take all the way up until Yuto and Shun to get into the show #but once you hit Shun versus Sora oh my god does the slowburn really feel worth it #it will also probably surprise no one that I have several OC's based on who Ema Bessho could've been and despite how much I hate how she's-#been written in canon I've taken ideas I've had for how she could be better written and slapped them onto characters for my own story uwu

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gaijinhunter · 5 years

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Monster Hunter World Iceborne: Review

I haven’t had the time to edit a video review so here it is in text!

Iceborne came and I got though Master Rank, through the last boss, and got to mess around with the end game in the 45 hours I have put into the game. Here is my spoiler free review. A shout out to Capcom for giving me a review code to play.

First off, I’m working off the assumption that you know about Iceborne and all the features it brings to the table so I’m not going to cover everything.

Main Story

While the main World story took about 40-50 hours, Iceborne will take about 30-40 depending on how you play. The story never felt like it was too much, and for the most part the flow was good. The story itself, like world, is nothing to write home about but it does add context to what you are doing, and also helps to explain why the new area opens up in parts.

Things I liked about how they handled it this time. First, all the major quests in the Hoarfrost Reach start out as expeditions, so that means if you are geared up enough, you could just beat the story monster in expedition mode, meaning you can cart more than twice and you won’t fail the quest.

Second, there is a large enough roster that if they tried to make you fight all the monsters as assigned quests, the game would be paced bad and the difficulty curve would be hard to control and I think they did a fine job of selecting the few monsters that did get featured as story quests and the difficulty goes up very nice and smooth from start to finish.

Seliana

The town of Seliana has the benefit of Capcom realizing what did and didn't work well in Astera and the result is a lovely town with a lovely main theme song. The layout is so well done, you won’t ever want to go back to Astera, and if you use the main functions of the hub town, I’d go as far as saying Seliana is a killer feature that makes Iceborne that more worth getting.

The thing I liked most about Seliana was the attention to detail especially when it comes to the felynes. There are some goofy things added in, which is something I felt World needed more of.

The customization options to your room are really fun and makes exploring maps and doing some of the less hardcore things really worth it. I also love the new slot machine mini-game in which you can earn tons of useful items, including a rare ticket which can be exchanged for precious master rank Pallium. No, there are no micro-transactions in this game, this is all in-game fun for fun’s sake.

Monsters

Iceborne has to my knowledge 8 additional monsters they haven’t publicly revealed, 5 you will encounter in the main game and 3 are special goodies for post game. Then of course they will add new monsters via DLC. All of the new monsters are memorable and fun, and more than world, monsters will appear in all sorts of maps, which makes the hunts against them more varied and enjoyable. Turf wars seem to be a huge feature of the game and luring monsters into each other so they can help shave off a few thousand hit points is a useful strategy you can employ in each hunt.

Mechanics

The game really focuses on using the clutch claw and for the most part it works well. The monsters do fatigue for a few seconds quite often but they are also tank like in how much health they have, so the addition of the claw and these new moments of opportunity don’t make the game easier. In fact, hunts take longer this time than previous games, which I think a lot of players might like. I still suspect the end of Master Rank hunts are taking too long for my comfort at about 20-25 minutes, but I think they might be adding this buffer to account for all the end game mechanics for buffing your weapons. Either way, the hunts are longer, the additional difficulty levels work especially 2 player, and the hunts are fun.

Weapons

Monsters being fun to hunt is good since since they fine tuned the game so that elemental weapons are meaningful again, so you’ll want to get a nice non-elemental weapon to stick with as you start to collect the other ones for the weapon or weapons of your choice. They don’t have a lot of choices for weapons so there isn’t any confusion on what to make or debate on which is the best elemental weapon to make. But weapons is one of the few things that remains very disappointing.

While some monsters like Zinogre saw most of its original weapon designs return, some of the weapons still are just ore or bone weapons with some monster material slapped on like a decoration. It hurts even worse this time, because there are so many iconic monsters that have returned. Capcom seems to have no clue that part of our memory of these monsters were the weapons we made from them. Looking at the Brachydios lance, I can’t see anything that excuses this design, and as a fan of these monsters, it feels like a slap in the face. What makes it worse is there seems to be no rhyme or reason for which weapons got to retain their iconic design and which got the ugly treatment, which just adds to the frustration because we don't even know why. This actually takes away some motivation for me to make more weapons and thus is something I need to be blunt and critical about here in my review.

Armor

The new armor is okay I guess. There isn’t a lot of variety but I think they are keeping it low to start so they can add in event variations and stuff, so it’s still too early to judge. I am disappointed that transmog hasn’t been introduced because some sets are still rubbish due to the focus on decorations. Take the Master Rank Odogaron set. First, the design is nice. But the set bonus is protective polish, which you can get in a single decoration if you get lucky, meaning that using 3 or more pieces form this set is kind of a waste. They could have made this version be called True Protective Polish and added in an attack or affinity boost, or something to make it different than the decoration, but they didn't. And ebony and basic odogaron have the same skill which was disappointing.

None of the new sets really screamed out to me as something I really wanted to get, and most of them come with random skills that I simply don’t want. In most cases it’s better to just get the beta sets since they have more slots, but the same can be said for world. One thing that is nice that they did was introduce new set bonuses for some monsters that raises the level cap of a specific skill, like say you want to have even more slugger KO damage, which normally goes to level 3, well if you trigger the diablos set skill you can raise it to level 5. The new decorations are simple and nice in that they are 4 slot decorations that have 2 skills or multiple levels of a single skill, so you could just theoretically grab a master rank weapon and terrorize high rank tempered monsters to collect a bunch of the core decorations you might be missing.

End Game

I won’t go into end game details but it’s certainly going to be something that people can sink several hundred hours into, so it’ll be fun to watch streamers play and do it, and it does give Capcom a new way to introduce new monsters later down the line. With world being a console game I probably won’t sink much time into the end game personally but I am still very happy with the overall package and I can always go and join other people on their quests so it’s not like I’m missing out on anything.

Overall:

Iceborne does a great job of building off the strong foundation that world gave it, fleshing it out with more monsters and things to do, and all the new mechanics feel and look great. The new hub town is a delight and master rank quests, while they can be a tad long, I bet most people will appreciate that instead of going in with 4 players and destroying a quest in 4 minutes. The choice to make some weapons look like a basic weapon with decorative material baffles me and I hope enough people will voice their unhappiness so that Capcom rethinks this artistic direction. But even that can’t change the fact that Iceborne is a fantastic addition that really completes the monster hunter world experience and in my opinion is more than worth its price-tag, I just feel that it holds it back from true greatness a little.

I hope you guys enjoyed this review, and and until next time, happy hunting!

#MHWorld #Iceborne #Review

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sg2tiger · 4 years

Photo

It’s that time of year when I rise from my tumblr grave and come to post the end-of-year look at the games I played

As always, my lengthy ramblings can be found under the cut. I’m thinking of posting a more trimmed down version on Twitter (where I am also pretty inactive but have slightly more of a presence than Tumblr these days).

—————————————— Assassin's Creed Syndicate (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Coming directly after finishing Unity I moved onto Syndicate, knowing that it was to be the last 'real' Assassin's Creed game (with the next two moving to a more RPG-style and set in periods before the assassins and templars really existed in their current forms). I had actually originally planned to skip Unity after its terrible launch, and had purchased - and even started playing - Syndicate back in 2017...but my computer at the time was struggling with just the prologue, averaging 20-30 FPS. Once the game actually arrived at London proper, my framerate tanked to 11 FPS or lower, and I had to put the game on the backburner until I'd upgraded my computer enough to handle it.

Ultimately I'm glad that it worked out the way it did, and I did end up going back and playing Unity before Syndicate, because the games are definitely very comparable. Both are a return to the older games' focus on exploring urban environments after the past several moved the cities themselves largely out of focus, and the gameplay of Syndicate is basically a polished up version of the new system introduced in Unity. The controls were smoother and tighter, and much appreciated fixes were made to some of Unity's worst offenders, like having automatic cover behind objects now instead of doing it manually, and the 'enter' button prompt that appears when you're over a window to climb inside - something I believe I mentioned in my Unity review as one of the worst things (gameplay-wise) about that game. Also, the whistle button makes a return after its extremely baffling removal in Unity, making it actually fun and worthwhile to kill enemies from hiding spots once again.

Combat in Syndicate was decent enough once I got used to it, but personally I really did prefer Unity's style. Unity was the first AC game where combat felt genuinely tactical, and where it was possible to get overwhelmed and wrecked by enemies at ANY level, even postgame with all your upgrades and gear - thus, encouraging stealth more, and not letting it get to the point where you're swarmed by huge groups of enemies in the first place. Syndicate has some cool multi-kill moves, but I didn't even figure out how to properly execute those until the very end of the game (when I was replaying the highest-level fightclub over and over trying to get Robert Topping's rep level maxed). Aside from some fancy visuals on the killmoves, though, the combat felt watered down to me - press X to attack, B to dodge the enemy's heavily-telegraphed incoming attacks, and occasionally A on those assholes that block. I dunno, I just really enjoyed Unity's variety with stuff like the slower heavy attack, and ground execution, even if the skill points system to unlock them made them mid-to-late game abilities. In Syndicate, like most AC games before it, once you hit around the midgame point and have more gear and better equipment, you become a one-man (or woman) army and there's no challenge left - I remember I got a 124 hit combo without taking a single blow during one of the final bouts in the highest-level fight club, because it's just way too easy to play the hit, hit, dodge, hit hit dodge, blockbreak hit hit dodge game. It's my understanding that Origins changes the combat system yet again, though, so we'll see if I find that any more satisfying.

One of the main new things about Syndicate - and one I've seen a LOT of negativity about across the internet - is the rope launcher (AKA grappling hook). How realistic the steampunk-esque gadget it aside, gameplay-wise I actually liked it and thought it made sense, since London's buildings are significantly taller than anything in the past games. Here's my take on it - it's nothing new for an AC game to introduce a new traversal gimmick that's exclusive to that specific title and its setting, because it makes sense in that setting. Revelations had the hookblade, which in a way was like the proto-rope launcher. AC III had the whole 'treerunning' system because of its frontier setting, which had a very different feel to it mechanically than climbing around on buildings. And of course, Black Flag was all about ship travel. But aside from Rogue basically being Black Flag II, all of these things have largely been restricted to those specific games that introduced them, because they made SENSE for those particular settings and environments - like, just because the Ottoman assassins used hookblades to travel around Constantinople, Ubisoft didn't make the hookblade a permanent part of the AC hero's repetoire going forward. I feel like the rope launcher is no different...it exists to make traversal in THIS particular setting a little less tedious, because having to manually climb some of these buildings the old-fashioned way would otherwise be a nightmare. Besides, it's also completely optional and you CAN simply climb around the old-fashioned way if you so choose - aside from maybe the tutorial mission when you first get the thing, I can't think of any point where you were forced to use the rope launcher at all. Personally I really liked it - I don't think it 'killed' the franchise's iconic parkour system but rather integrated with it. Zip from the ground up the side of the building to a rooftop, then run and hop between the roofs and poles and rafters like usual, then zip across a large gap to a different rooftop, climb up and over a chimney, and jump across onto another roof. Sure, there's nothing stopping you from abusing the rope launcher to zip from place to place exclusively, just as there's nothing stopping you from not using the rope launcher at all. But that's exactly why it's stupid to complain about it. It's all about how much or how little the player feels like using it...and I mostly used it to fill in the gaps of otherwise standard AC roof running, mixing it in and integrating it with that gameplay, rather than replacing it. Maybe that's why I actually had fun with it.

The last new thing gameplay-wise I guess would be carriages. Once I got the hang of using them properly (gunning for first place in all the street races is very educational), it was fun enough, I suppose. I don't think the Grand Theft London jokes are lost on anyone, but personally GTA isn't my type of game so I can't say I especially LOVED the carriage driving either. I don't really care about the 'historical accuracy' of having video game horsecarts handle more like video game automobiles, I just don't really tend to like driving in video games in general. I also feel really guilty every time I crush an innocent bystander to death, which is VERY hard to avoid when you drive these things, so I think I spent a good while consciously avoiding driving unless necessary. Smashing through inanimate objects and causing wanton destruction is pretty fun, though. All in all not one of my favorite new features of the game, but I didn't hate it, either - which is a good thing given how many missions force you to get behind the reins.

As far as the story and characters go, Syndicate may not have been a marvel, but it was leagues above Unity. Jacob and Evie are likable enough, and while there's the usual share of forgettable one-note assassination targets there were also quite memorable ones like Pearl Attaway, Maxwell Roth and of course Starrick himself. I actually really liked Starrick as a character, though I felt it was a shame how little screentime he actually got considering he's the Big Bad behind the scenes of everything going on - I suppose that fit his role as sort of the businessman who uses his vast network of employees handle situations while he sits in his office and comfortably sips tea, but the out-of-focus nature he himself had in the story felt like a waste of such a charismatic character. It was however nice to see a return to the modern day story, even if it was still pretty far shoved into the background...it was at least THERE. And even Desmond got acknowledged for the first time in a while, which was nice. It's unfortunate that I know now the Juno plot was wrapped up in the COMICS rather than the actual games (something I really have no interest in reading but at this point feel like I have to just for closure), but if I had played Syndicate at the time when it came out I know I'd have been excited by a lot of the revelations that happened at the end, especially considering how far into the background Unity shoved the modern day and Juno storyline.

I think my biggest character complaint would fall to Henry Green, who's supposed to be your assassin mentor but felt like little more than a satellite around Evie for the entire game. When you first arrive in London and he gives you the rundown on how things are in the city, he reminded me of Yusuf from Revelations - someone more familiar with the goings-on than the player character, and a reliable companion and guide who the player can count on. After that, however, he felt pushed into the background and never really DID anything except, of course, accompany Evie on some of her missions. His whole thing is that he's not really a field agent, and yet the game forces him into the field JUST so he can tag along with Evie as part of one of the most forced obligatory romances I've seen in a video game. There is absolutely no chemistry between the two - Evie spends the whole first half of the game basically being defined by her work, and I NEVER got the sense that she really felt anything about Henry even when it became obvious he was interested in her. And then the game forces the whole 'oh Evie let her feelings get in the way and saved Henry and oh she's so conflicted because she's in love even though they've known each other for probably a couple of months at most but oh mixing romance and work is wrong but oh apparently Father and Mother were very much in love and it didn't compromise their work as assassins so it's okay and YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES I'LL MARRY YOU'. I was cringing the entire time - but of course, it's Ubisoft, so it had to be this way.

Speaking of Ubisoft's typical treatment of female characters, though, I DO have a few criticisms about Evie as well. We all know about the controversy Ubisoft got itself into for saying female characters were 'too much work' during Unity, and Syndicate seems like a pretty obvious response to that backlash. Giving her a co-starring role with her brother made sense, too - if it was ONLY a female protagonist, right after the backlash, Ubisoft would be accused of caving to pressure and find itself with another controversy. I think it was a smart decision to do it this way, and the story missions are pretty evenly split so you're forced to play as each of them about equally, even disregarding who you choose to play as during the open world segments (though Evie probably should have been doing something during Sequence 8 while Jacob was off blowing shit up with Roth).

My problem is more with Evie's personality...or rather, the way she's used in the story. Jacob, like most previous AC protagonists, is flawed. His flaw is his impulsiveness and tendency to rush into situations without thinking of the consequences...those consequences then becoming immediately apparent when Evie has to rush in and quickly fix his mistakes. Evie however is more focused and methodical, putting all her attention on hunting Lucy Thorne and the Shroud. Ultimately the message here, I think, is that both of the twins need EACH OTHER because when they work alone they don't see the big picture. However it felt to me more like Evie's job was just cleaning up after her clumsy brother, because she's so perfect and infallible and always right. It felt to me like in the backlash over 'no female characters' they overcorrected somewhat with Evie, because she comes off far less flawed than her brother. Arguably her flaw is that by focusing too much on the Shroud she ignores the rampant corruption eating away at London, but the story never really focuses on that angle...Evie just comes off as always being right when Jacob inevitably fucks up the next big thing. You could also say the whole 'oh no I put personal feelings before the mission' is supposed to be her flaw, but the story also goes out of its way in the end to say 'no, it's okay to do that, your father was wrong'...so, also not a flaw. Then what IS Evie's flaw? I really can't see one...and I feel like that makes her less interesting as a character. I certainly didn't DISLIKE Evie, but I feel like she just didn't have as much personality as her brother, whose flaw was more apparent and impacted his development more (feeling betrayed by Pearl, and how apathetic he got in the aftermath with Roth, in particular). Evie just...spends half the game being perfect, being right, cleaning up after her clumsy brother, and then falling victim to a romantic plot tumor. Since she was the first playable female assassin as far as most fans are concerned (it's okay, Aveline, *I* remember you) this just seems like a shame to me...a wasted opportunity to make Evie just as interesting and flawed and capable of making mistakes as her brother (and no, compromising the mission by RESCUING ANOTHER HUMAN BEING FROM CERTAIN DEATH is NOT a flaw, only sociopaths would consider that a flaw, and the game even makes it clear that it also does not consider it a flaw). I think Ubisoft was probably just too afraid to make their first major female assassin come off negatively, so they played it safe - TOO safe, resulting in Evie ultimately being more bland and uninteresting than Jacob was. Don't get me wrong, they absolutely fucked up on multiple levels with Elise in Unity, but at least she felt like an interesting and nuanced character to me...even if she DID get stuffed in the fridge.

Anyway...ultimately I had fun with Syndicate. Worth mentioning that I did NOT get any of the DLC, because the reviews for both the Maharaja and Jack the Ripper DLCs on Steam were extremely negative and didn't seem worth it at all...nor did (to me) the assorted extra missions or the murder mystery packs. Murder mysteries were an alright change of pace in Unity, but they were also way too easy and certainly not interesting enough for me to want to pay extra for. I've got 98 hours logged for 100% completing Syndicate sans-DLC, compared to 138 in Unity for doing the same + Dead Kings, but Syndicate FELT longer to me. The world was bigger and I felt like I spent more time playing around in it, and aside from my aforementioned complaints about combat I feel like it did just about everything better than Unity. I've seen a lot of generally mixed reviews around the internet and even some people saying they thought Unity was better, but I can't really agree with that. All in all Syndicate was a solid and enjoyable game, and may quite possibly be the last Assassin's Creed game of its kind given the direction we've moved into with Origins and Odyssey, so...perhaps someday people will look back on it more fondly.

—————————————— Assassin's Creed Origins (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended —————��————————

Within the first 5 minutes of the game (if not less), things already felt innately...off. I knew that Origins retooled a lot of the game to be more RPG-like, but I guess I completely underestimated the extent to which EVERYTHING would change. After all, Unity sort of kicked off the trend of having a basic skill point system and different purchasable weapons/armor, and Syndicate furthered it with an even more in-depth skill tree and the reintroduction of crafting. I figured Origins would simply further refine these RPG-like systems, and tidy up combat yet again, which had also seen some changes in both Unity and Origins.

In any case, one of the first things (literally) I had to do was find the options menu and change the default control scheme, which is SUCH a huge departure from the system the series has been using for 10 years that it left my muscle memory crying. Fortunately the 'Alternate' control preset is far closer to the classic and familiar style (with RT as the run/climb button, for instance), and the PC version at least also allows you to rebind the controls further...which I did (particularly to put the drop/parkour down button on B, as it was in Unity and Syndicate). Rebinding the controls too much *can* lead to some issues with overlap and even breaking certain functions (I can no longer dive underwater with B presumably because I set it as my 'drop' button, so now it does a dash underwater instead...so I do have to use the C key on my keyboard to actually dive now) but ultimately those snags are pretty minor. That said, the resulting new controls during chariot races being so heavily concentrated on the right side of my controller did leave my hand seriously hurting after my first racing tournament.

(I wrote a lot about my thoughts on this right after starting, coming off Syndicate and feeling the unfamiliarity of the game hard, and it comes off a lot like I’m rambling about the Good Ol’ Days of AssCreed and how different Origins is from that experience more than an actual review of the game. While I think a lot of what I ranted about is still valid, it’s also not really about THIS game, so I think I’m just gonna skip over a lot of that and get into my actual, I-finally-finished-the-game thoughts instead)

Ultimately I enjoyed it a lot, and I did 100% complete the whole game + both DLCs, but at the end of the day I have to stand by my verdict that it’s not really an ASSASSIN'S CREED game as we’ve come to know them for so long. Did I have a lot of fun taking out entire camps with the predator bow before anyone could catch me in the act? Very much. But that's about the only kind of SNEAKING I felt like I ever had to do in the game, compared to older entries that had a wider variety of stealth options. Bayek was definitely more of a warrior than an assassin, IMO. I feel like, for all the flak it got as a game (and much of it deserved), Unity was the best AC as far as stealth mechanics and mission options. Syndicate refined those and fixed things like moving behind cover, but with Jacob being more of a brawler that also meant there was a lot of that game you could easily do without having to be super stealthy. Bayek, and the push towards the more RPG-like systems in Origins, makes it pretty clear that we likely won't be getting a return to classic AC form any time soon, and while I enjoyed Origins a lot that still makes me very sad.

Still, I look forward to Odyssey whenever it decides to go on sale enough for me to grab it, because Origins WAS a lot of fun. I ended up clocking 192 hours in it, completing all the DLC, and getting every achievement, so clearly I enjoyed the game. It's more just a bittersweet feeling that the AC franchise as we knew it is probably dead, as Ubisoft moves further and further away from the franchise staples, and continues to bury the modern day story and conspiracy theory angles deeper beneath the historical storyline.

(I also had some rants about how Aya/Amunet would have made a better protagonist of a proper Assassin’s Creed game while Bayek was more the protagonist of a general revenge story and how Aya, as she was, was much like Evie in that I didn’t really like her much and feel like I could/should have liked her more if she was utilized better as a more robust character, but in the interest of not going off on this game forever I’m gonna snip that part as well)

—————————————— 7 Days to Die (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Another of the plethora of survival/building/crafting games that have been all the rage these days. Sorta like ARK, but instead of dinosaurs, it's zombies. Zombie games aren't personally my cup of tea, because I am a big baby, and the game has a lot of elements that I think would classify it as survival horror and not just survival/building/crafting. Solo, I would never be able to tolerate this game, but with a friend or two, I found it quite fun. It scratches a lot of the same itches as ARK but the survival aspects take more of a forefront, whereas in ARK once you've progressed to metal tools and flak armor the temperature and hunger management aspects become little more than a minor nuisance.

When we started out, we were right on the border of the snow biome (once my friend trekked from their spawn point and found me, that is), so the cold and just barely avoiding constant starvation (sometimes) was an ever-present threat. It really felt like we were being pushed to raid the nearby houses in hopes of finding scraps of food and resources to keep us alive. After a while we were able to gear up enough to move slightly further out to a more temperate biome, near a large cornfield, where we could begin cultivating our own crops. Once starvation became manageable we were able to shift out focus to other tasks, like expanding our base in preparation for the titular 7th day (though it was the 30th day due to adjusted server settings for us) - the Bloodmoon, where swarms and swarms of zombies attack your base and you have to survive the night.

This sort of PVE tower defense mode is something I've often wished was a thing in ARK (and no, orbital supply drops aren't the same thing) - PVP is too toxic for my tastes, but a constant problem in that game is reaching the eventual 'now what?' point where you're practically unfuckable and nothing is a challenge anymore. Having that sort of ever-present danger and challenge to look forward to (or dread, if done right) keeps PVE gameplay in this sort of game a lot more interesting because you can't just sit on your laurels and get complacent. PVE builds are generally more about making buildings that look nice and less about fortifying them with adequate defenses because those rexes that stomp through your front yard can't bite through metal, so why worry? I like having that balance, where I can build a base that I think looks nice and is functional with storage and crafting and whatnot, but I ALSO like the idea that if my defenses aren't up to snuff...I can kiss my ass goodbye.

So the Bloodmoon mechanic, while terrifying, is a big draw of this game IMO. There's also the other side of that PVP coin that sounds fun in theory but is not in practice (because real people are assholes): raiding other peoples' bases. Of course, zombies spawn randomly in the overworld and you can run into them any time during your travels and resource runs, but the map is also littered with abandoned houses and other buildings like stores, factories, hospitals and even creepy mad scientist castles. These places often have pretty good resources and loot, so you're encouraged to explore them...but of course they are also crawling with zombies. And the zombies are not always out in the open for you to get off a quick headshot on, either - often times they'll hide, inside closets or above ceiling tiles, to ambush you if you're careless. You really have to be prepared for anything, and willing to drop heavy loot and run away if the going gets particularly tough. To me this feels more engaging than just killing stuff out in the overworld, because it's like I actually have to conquer someone else's castle and that feels more like a concrete goal to me.

In general it feels like a fairly standard, but enjoyable, early access (but frequently updated) survival/building/crafting game. However, these little things kept me coming back for more once I'd grown bored of being the unconquerable dino king of ARK. Would I recommend it? Only to a specific audience, but that audience has probably already played it. For me the general survival horror atmosphere and frequent jumpscares in narrow corridors when a zombie jumps out at you from above the ceiling and shit is a lot...even playing with my friend, I basically played the support sniper role in combat while they had the frontline with melee weapons, and that didn't stop my heart from leaping out of my chest on many occasions. I remember that time we raided a huge pharmacy building on a day where it just would not stop raining...the rain sounds in this game are VERY realistic, and also very loud. I could barely hear my friend over the rain half the time, let alone the warning sounds of nearby zombies being drowned out by the storm. We had to stay the night, and well into the next day it was STILL raining...we had so many close calls in there, and even a couple actual deaths (fortunately we had temporary beds set up in a safe room so we wouldn't have to trek back from base). Once the rain finally stopped, and we returned to base and called it a night IRL, I felt such relief...I hadn't realized how much I was ACTUALLY STRESSED by the game in such a tense situation. Which...is that "fun"? Again, I think it depends on the type of person, and even then is probably very situational. I think I realized in the aftermath that I did not have fun that night, but when I was there in the moment, the tension was certainly immersive.

So yeah. It's a fun game if you have a good friend or two to play it with, and if you think you can handle horror elements and potential jumpscares. Which I can't. But my friend is very supportive and understanding of that so I didn't have to feel like a big baby when I got audibly startled during our gameplay sessions, so I really do think WHO you play it with can make a big difference, too.

—————————————— Ultimate Skyrim (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

A bit of an odd thing to review, I know. Ultimate Skyrim is obviously not a game in itself, but as a modpack that completely revises the way the game is played I felt like it was worth mentioning...especially since it gives me something to pad out this very small list with.

I actually first heard about Ultimate Skyrim a couple years ago, but back then the install process was so daunting that even I (someone who can spend weeks perfecting my load order whenever I go to replay Skyrim) was put off by it. Plus, at the time, it was still in version 3 and I knew there was a version 4 in the works, so I figured I may as well wait for that before I gave it a try.

When I got the itch to replay Skyrim again, as I seem to every year once fall and winter come around, I remembered UltSky existed and check in to see that version 4 was out, had full gamepad support (essential for me), AND the install process was easier than ever thanks to the Automaton tool. So I thought, why not?

It was my first time trying Requiem, but I'm no stranger to some of the basic concepts the mod introduces, since some of my mainstay mods (ex. Advanced Adversary Encounters) make similar changes. Plus, a solid half of the UltSky pack consisted of mods I've played regularly, so I didn't think it would be that hard to acclimate to.

I was wrong.

Requiem changes much more than I expected it to, which, in hindsight, explains why practically every mod out there requires a patch to work with it. The constant stamina drain that you need to account for with buffs from food, made worse if you decide to go heavy armor...no natural health regen, and all potions being heal-over-time instead of flat instant heals...the perk tree really requiring thought and planning to budget your points right and not spread yourself too thin, and even getting 'locked in' to the type of standing stone you choose as your birthsign. All kinds of little elements piling up to make your early game a living nightmare.

I'll cut right to the chase here: I found that I don't much like Requiem. Now, I'm not opposed to challenge, and pretty much every playthrough I mod my game to MAKE the game more challenging because vanilla Skyrim is such a cakewalk. But it's the WAY Requiem changes things, the specific mindset and vision that toes the line between 'fun' challenging and 'you must be a masochist or hardcore minmaxer to enjoy this' that doesn't appeal to me specifically. I much prefer my usual combination of Advanced Adversary Encounters + Wildcat + Ultimate Combat + Mortal Enemies + maybe True Armor (I only played a little with it on my last pre-UltSky playthrough but I liked it) to make fights more deadly and tactical. Requiem makes combat more difficult, absolutely, but the vision is different, and it feels like minmaxing is the answer to surviving encounters more than strategy and skill. Like, if I don't have the right gear, or perked myself in a specific way, or else carry an assload of fortify potions (something I hate even in the base game but is made even more annoying to me through Requiem and UltSky's unpaused menu system)...then my chances of surviving are very, very slim. And to me that just isn't fun.

A deleveled world is kind of fun, though I'd never tried it before...that sense of progression where you can't just take on a cave of warlocks at level 2 gives me something to work towards, though it does also feel somewhat limiting as far as where you start. One of the appeals of alternate start mods and WHY they're among the most popular is that freedom of not having to go Helgen > Riverwood > Whiterun, but a deleveled world also makes me feel like I'm being punished if I get a random start up in Windhelm, and that I have to head down and chump it up in Whiterun anyway, because that's where the weak enemies who won't oneshot me are. I'm sort of whatever about that aspect though.

To me it's like...I can't agree with it being called 'the roleplaying overhaul' because having to focus so much on how I spend my perks, what spells I learn, my gear, which enchantments I use, having to carry at least 3 weapons at any given time and encumber my loot-loving ass because I never know if I might need a mace or a sword...the list goes on. I'm not trying to shit on it because there's clearly a huge community of people who love what Requiem brings to the table - they're just all things that don't appeal to me PERSONALLY when I can usually think of a mod that makes the same sort of changes to my game but does so in a way that I find more appealing, that's all.

So then...if I'm feeling this negative about Requiem (the very core of Ultimate Skyrim), why did I give it a positive rating? Well, because even if I don't love Requiem, I still think Ultimate Skyrim is fun.

I know that probably sounds ridiculous. But to me, I think considering Ultimate Skyrim as just 'that one Requiem modpack' is really selling it short. UltSky adds a lot on top of that core Requiem experience, and while some of that makes the struggle to survive the early levels even MORE hellish than base Requiem, I think it actually manages to bring the roleplaying and - dare I say - immersion - back to the table.

Of course, it's got a lot of the classic 'immersion' mods in there...iNeed, Frostfall, Campfire, even somewhat more niche stuff like Bathing in Skyrim. Needs mods I can give or take, sometimes I don't bother with them because the micromanagement can often feel more annoying than fun (I prefer cooking mods that make meals feel more worth eating with long-lasting buffs than mods that actually make me 'hungry', usually). I'd never used Frostfall before for similar reasons despite being very aware of it for years because of its popularity...I actually didn't dislike it though, and it really does make Skyrim feel harsher and like you have to prepare more for your journeys.

The thing about UltSky is that it's not just a big rec list of mods thrown together haphazardly. BelmontBoy has actually taken the enormous amount of time to patch all these mods together to make them work as one seamless, cohesive entity. Of course, it's not perfect - at the end of the day Skyrim was simply not designed with a lot of these features in mind, and the MCM configuration at the start of every new character you make is a huge pain in the ass. But once you get it going, the functions all fit pretty well together...planning my daily activities and general gameplay loop around the weather and time of day, making sure I drop into the tavern and have a bite to eat, deposit any goods in a safe chest and my (weighted) gold off with the bank service, and making sure I go to bed at a decent hour and sleep well.

Ultimately (heh) it makes Skyrim feel like a completely different game, and changes the way you play significantly. I may not agree with all of those changes, but I can't deny the appeal of having an easy to install pack that doesn't take me 3 weeks to perfect before I can play, and where the mods are all designed to work well with each other so unexpected conflicts don't pop up halfway into my playthrough when it's too late to fix them. The controller support and things like iEquip and EasyWheel are also conveniences that changed the game for me, and I will definitely be planning to make use of in future non-UltSky playthroughs as well...for that matter, I also found myself surprisingly enjoying the unpaused menus (though I disabled it for merchants because I got tired of their idle dialogue firing constantly while I was shopping).

Of course, being me, I did make some personal changes to my UltSky install (particularly things like Noxcrab's and kbeazy's Req and UltSky patches to tone down some of the more masochistic elements of Requiem), but the fact that it's as accessible and easy as it is to get up and running even for people who DON'T obsess over their load orders is a big deal, I think.

Is it the ultimate Skyrim experience? No, absolutely not. The ultimate Skyrim experience will always be the one you build yourself to your preferences, and don't have to make due with features you don't like. But I do really appreciate and respect the work BelmontBoy has done with Ultimate Skyrim, and I would absolutely recommend it to anyone who wants to try something a bit different.

Though I'm done playing it for the time being, I've still got another playthrough planned that I think will work pretty well with UltSky...it was a character I was really having fun with, but basically had to abandon due to mod complications fucking up my save and me not having the energy to troubleshoot. I think reviving him in UltSky would be pretty fun, so next time that Skyrim urge inevitably hits me, that's my plan.

—————————————— Ciconia no Naku Koro Ni: Phase 1 (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended ——————————————

Alright, alright. Ciconia’s not really a GAME, but as the first When They Cry in almost a decade I feel like it would be a crime for me to not include it on my list.

Worth noting, first of all, that I pretty much never buy games on day 1 at full price. I wait for them to go on sale for $20 or under, even if it means waiting a few years (which is why I'm usually so behind the times on the games I've played). But we've already waited 8 years since Umineko ended for the next When They Cry, when we didn’t even know if the franchise was gonna continue AT ALL. Besides that, the most fun part of a new WTC is getting to discuss it with people while it's exciting and fresh, and waiting around for a sale would mean missing out on all that. As it is, I didn't get into Umineko until a little before the release of EP5, so I missed out on all the live discussions for the question arcs while they were still new. I wasn't about to sit around and wait a year or more for the price to drop. Ciconia was a rare full-price day 1 purchase for me, and I finished it over the course of the release weekend.

Since I already reviewed the game after finishing my liveblog in the 07th Expansion Central Discord server, I’m going to basically reiterate and build upon what I said then when my thoughts were still fresh.

I enjoyed Phase 1 a lot and it definitely surprised me in how long it was, and how polished just about everything was (maybe except the small BGM selection, but that will surely be expanded in future phases). We had animations, detailed backgrounds and sprites, it definitely feels like a big improvement over Umineko in the presentation department...but it still falls victim to the same issue Umineko EP1 and Higurashi's Onikakushi had, something that Ryukishi seems to have trouble with in general - PACING.

To be FAIR, the whole setting of Ciconia did necessitate a lot more exposition than the previous When They Cry entries. Umineko and Higurashi took place in 1980's Japan - a time and place that actually existed. Ciconia takes place in the far future and had a LOT of worldbuilding Ryukishi basically had to establish from the ground up, not to mention taking place on a global scale featuring parts of the world that the average Japanese reader might not be familiar with, especially with how the factions of A3W also make those parts of the world so different than we know them today. So I DO understand why it had to drag on like that, to a degree, because Ryukishi clearly had a LOT he wanted to convey in both worldbuilding and social and political commentary (and a lot of what seemed like very clear Take Thats at people who missed and continue to miss the point of Umineko to this day, even after the EP8 manga adaptation should have cleared all doubts).

Even so...it's still hard to actually push through huge infodumps like that, before anything really engaging happens to hook you in. We had to learn about the state of the world and the factions and all the tech and just about everything and I do admire HOW MUCH worldbuilding he came up with here and how he managed to eventually explain just about all of it in a way that left me feeling like I had a pretty solid grasp on how the world worked...but at the same time, it was hard to just sit down and will myself to read through so much lengthy exposition.

I think if I had to compare it to Higurashi and Umineko's starting episodes, the beginning paced much better. Phase 1 was much LONGER than either of those two first installments, and it still managed to sprinkle a lot of intrigue into the early parts that made it a little easier to get into than, say, Higurashi spending an absurdly long time on the slice of life club game antics before the real meat of the story began, or Umineko going on and on ad nauseum about the family's history and financial problems when I'm just sitting here waiting for the witch to show up.

But while Higurashi and Umineko dragged their feet through the beginning, I think the worst of Ciconia's pacing was actually the MIDDLE section.

There was a point where it seemed that, after every genuinely interesting scene that left me curious and wanting more, I got teleported back to the bathhouse against my will to listen to the same 4 characters have the exact same conversation for 20 minutes before I could finally get back to the next interesting scene...only for it to happen again after that.

That endless pattern of:

>world is going to shit despite our efforts >we're just chess pieces and have no power >cheer up miyao you're having an impact on everyone and we can do it >let's protect the walls of peace together!!!! >shit goes wrong again, rinse, repeat

Look, I GET it. You're all comrades working together to support the walls of peace, and you're also treasured friends fighting against the corrupt and uncaring adults who don't understand or appreciate all you young gauntlet knights have had to endure for the sake of maintaining those walls of peace. And how no matter what they try to do to get you to hate each other or kill each other, you'll always be friends who will work together, to maintain the walls of peace!!! I GET IT. YOU DON'T NEED TO KEEP SAYING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER. I KNOW that I am reading a When They Cry novel and that, to appreciate the full ironic pain that comes once these characters DO turn on each other and the cruel slaughter begins, I need to see them when they are insisting that they'll never hurt each other, but I'd rather SEE them bond than just be TOLD over and over that they're comrades supporting the walls of peace!!

The thing is, aside from a small handful (Cairo in particular), I DO feel like we got to see the characters bond. So why, on top of that, did we ALSO need to keep repeating walls of peace walls of peace walls of peace over and over again BESIDES? It felt like unnecessary padding at that point, when so many interesting things were going on, but we just had to keep cutting away from them to watch the same tired scene play out at least once per chapter.

It probably also doesn't help that Ciconia is a beast composed of two themes/genres I'm not really a big fan of - sci-fi/futuristic, and heavy political/social commentary. So the fact that the beginning was spent largely explaining all the futuristic sci-fi technology, and the middle was spent going on a lot about the political angle, may not have helped hold my interest as much. Not to say I didn't enjoy the story, just that those factors may have made it even harder for me to latch on than it may have been for other people. Still, I've heard a lot of people voice the pacing complaint for various reasons so I don't think it's ALL me, there.

In general, Phase 1 was a rollercoaster ride. I was really drawn in heavily by the conspiracy theory and mystery elements, but found myself grow bored during the more politically-charged parts. The social commentary was certainly topical and I appreciated the fact that Ryukishi had a lot he wanted to say (which almost seemed to be making up for how he kept Umineko vague due to it being 'difficult to talk about' certain key subjects of that story), but the parts about the strife between the factions over geographical and political issues were less engaging to me. The more conspiracy-laden bits of intrigue grabbed me a lot more - I felt a lot of overlap between that angle of the story and the early Assassin's Creed games (before the modern day got more and more shafted), with that strong angle of 'history is written by the winners and there's a whole bunch of stuff that happened in the past that is being deliberately covered up', and I really like that. The strong biblical undercurrent especially enhances that sort of mystique that makes ancient conspiracies so fascinating...the idea that there could be secrets from antiquity that have fallen into myth and legend due to the meddling of ancient sects like the Three Kings, seeking to guide humanity down what they consider to be 'the right path', regardless of how many lives are lost as they repeat their schemes over and over again.

For Phase 1, at least, there was a LOT going on, because so much had to be established. I imagine it'll get easier from this point now that all this stuff is out of the way, so we can focus more on how all these different elements intertwine. Hell, we spent all that time in the beginning talking about CPPs and Meow, but she basically faded off and became irrelevant halfway through the story. SURELY all that stuff was more than just Ryukishi talking some sense into the people who ignored Umineko's message, and will come into play more in future phases, but as of right now there's a lot of elements like that where it feels like we don't know enough to really speculate on how important it's going to be to the story. Right now there are so many things going on that it's hard to know what to focus on - content-wise, it feels like we got as much as 3 arcs' worth of Higurashi and Umineko. Of course, if Ciconia really is only going to be 4 phases long, that makes sense...but it does make it a lot harder to figure out what we should be paying attention to when SO much has happened already. The last 20 minutes of the game alone was far more of a mindfuck than anything in Higurashi or Umineko.

All in all I am very much looking forward to Phase 2 (which has already been delayed from its expected release of next May, though I already predicted that'd happen...does that make this a 'prophecy'?), and I've enjoyed discussing it all in the 07th Expansion Central Discord, so I feel like I got my money's worth already. Time will tell how Ciconia stacks up to the obsessive experience that Umineko was for me, but for better or worse, I have faith in Ryukishi to make this story a Hell of a ride.

—————————————— Kingdom Come Deliverance (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended (if the middle ages mysogyny doesn't put you off) ——————————————

I'd heard both good and bad things about KCD when it came out...people praised the attention to historical detail and realism, but complained about the plethora of bugs and performance issues (on PC anyway). I was a little surprised to see it offer a steep discount and free play weekend back in September, when the game only just came out in 2018, but I figured, why not give it a try since it's free? I ended up playing for almost 20 hours before the weekend ended, and found myself enjoying it more than I thought I would.

Coming right on the heels of my Ultimate Skyrim playthough, I was impressed by how much more enjoyable the RPG survival mechanics could be when a game was actually built with them IN MIND, rather than having to tack them on with mods. A lot of the core KCD features are similar to Requiem and UltSky - no auto-health regen, having to actually practice and train to get skilled using your weapons/armor, paying attention to your opponents in combat and not being able to win just by mashing attack, as well as having to keep yourself fed, rested, and so on. But since KCD was actually designed with all of these systems integrated, it felt a lot less clunky and tedious to manage them. I ended up being pretty sad that I didn't grab it during the sale before the free weekend ended and I found myself enjoying my UltSky playthrough a lot less after witnessing these kinds of 'hardcore' features done, well...better than Requiem does them.

The game went on sale again about 2 months later, and since it coincided with my birthday, I decided to go for it.

One thing I feel I've been getting more and more used to these days is the first-person perspective in games. It's always been something I've disliked compared to third person, and typically if a game gives me the choice I'll go with third every time. In crafting/survival games like ARK (which HAS third person but it kinda sucks), 7 Days to Die and even hearkening back to my Minecraft days of yore, first person was more tolerable and made sense because it's much easier to build things with a first person camera. It also makes sense for shooters because you get an unobstructed aim at your target - the same reason I'll usually switch into first for archery in Skyrim, even though I play everything else in third. But a full blown RPG in first, with no option to switch situationally, was still difficult for me to get used to. Once you understand the basics of how KCD's combat works and everything though, it's obvious why it wouldn't really WORK with a third person camera, so after a while it became second nature to me.

While I'm still not quite finished at the time of this review (just got out of the monestary and am wrapping up sidequests before getting locked into the final endgame story quests), I can say I've quite enjoyed the story so far. It's not exactly a groundbreaking premise - you start off in the Doomed RPG Hometown where you do your little tutorial missions and get a feel for how to play, then the bad guys storm through and slaughter everyone, including your parents, sparking the hero's quest for revenge. However, there's something about the characterization and the gravity of the situation (especially with Henry being a peasant and not a JRPG adventurer) still managed to suck me in. That scene near the beginning, when you're standing there on the castle ramparts in the rainy night, watching the lord of Talmberg try and deceive the enemy...and then explicitly disobey orders and flee back to Skalitz to bury your parents even though it's a foregone conclusion that it's a Very Bad Idea...there was something that just really gripped me and made me eager to find out what would happen next. Which, considering I was playing on a free weekend at this point, also worked really well from the standpoint of devs hooking you with a strong beginning enough to make you want to purchase the game.

Sure, with time, training, and enough money to buy some really good weapons and armor (or enough perseverance to win some in the weekly tournaments, like I did) you can turn Henry from a lowly blacksmith's son into an RPG God. BUT...it DOES take work to get there, and it feels believable as a result. You're handed a Really Nice Sword in the very beginning of the game but because you have no idea how to lose it you get your ass quickly handed to you, the sword stolen, and would be left for dead if not for the timely intervention of a neighbor. The thing is, though this event is of course scripted, it doesn't FEEL like the game is railroading me into purposefully losing a fight that I might have been able to win due to player skill...because at this point, Henry legitimately has no training!! No amount of savescumming (also made nearly impossible by the game's default save system, though I am using the unlimited save mod) or player cheesing could change the fact that a peasant who's never had to swing a real sword or fight for his life would get his shit kicked in by an actual trained warrior. Only after this event, when you have the opportunity to take lessons with Captain Bernard, can you actually learn proper (if basic, at first) sword techniques and work your way into becoming an actual man-at-arms.

That sense of actual growth and progression in Henry is a big part of what makes the experience fun, I think. You really do feel like you're a struggling nobody at the beginning, but as you work your way up in the world and become more respected by your peers and even the nobility, you start to feel like you earned it. You get to go from an unwashed peasant in dirty and torn-up clothes starting petty arguments with the local lord-to-be to a trusted and well-respected member of the local garrison, wearing your expensive and regularly-polished armor and listening to the people greet you accordingly. Does it have some of the power fantasy elements you'd expect from a zero-to-hero story? Maybe so, but they never felt like they were undeserved - all the respect my Henry got was due to his actions, and not just by virtue of being The Protagonist.

That said, there are some elements of the game that might not sit well with people. The game does take place in 1403 and its main selling point is its historical realism, and all that historical realism entails - but that doesn't mean the Medieval Misogyny is going to be tolerable for everyone playing it in 2019+1 and beyond. Females are generally cast in the roles you would expect of them during the time period and even the 'strong' female characters are still subservient to the men. That's how it was, and for a game that sells itself on its authenticity, it's a bit of a sticky thing to argue about. Likewise I've seen criticism about 'racism' simply because pretty much every character in the game is white...even though darker-skinned people would have been pretty rare to the area in that time period (possibly in Prague, but the game doesn't actually take you there, so that's a moot point). Still, while I don't think they're really fair arguments to make against the game for simply portraying things the way they were back then, it's still absolutely fair to say the game isn't for everybody and there's nothing wrong with people who might find the content offensive.

At the end of the day this is still a game where you are forced to play the role of a male character - this is not a create-your-own-hero game where you get to define who you are and what you look like and 100% of your character's backstory and personality. It's the story of Henry, and while you're given a lot of opportunities to play Henry as a respectable Knight or as an absolute Scoundrel as you please, it is still HENRY'S STORY - not yours. This is a game where there are achievements for having sex, and an achievement for remaining a virgin. You can use the bathhouses to have a good time and get yourself an 'alpha male' buff if you so choose (I've not once used them for anything but cleaning my clothes because I am staying loyal to Theresa). You'll bump into quests where you'll see things like a lord not wishing to purchase well-bred horses from a woman simply because she's a woman, or the very insinuation that you might want to help give a down-on-her-luck woman a job as a water carrier (physical work!!) absolutely ludicrous. All kinds of little things like that, which are in my opinion pretty minor in the grand scheme of misogyny in video games, but again...while I don't hold it against the game itself for its portrayal of the era, I also don't hold it against people who might be offended by these things to not play the game.

If you ARE willing to look past some occasionally uncomfortable 'historical accuracy', though, you'll find a very enjoyable RPG with largely likable characters and engaging (if not revolutionary) storytelling. The game mechanics are well-integrated and it feels less like I'm being forced to eat/drink/sleep/bathe and more like I'm willingly adopting a realistic schedule and means of planning my days. Once you master the combat system you can definitely feel like an unfuckable God, but all it takes is one extra enemy being alerted to your presence than you planned for, or a single failed block, to ruin your day and remind you that you are still a normal human being and not a supernatural video game war machine. If that kind of thing sounds less like a fun challenge and more like frustration to you, this is probably also not a game you will enjoy. Personally I really like it, and when I do get my shit kicked in it feels like it's my own fault for being too cocky and ill-prepared (great example: I never wear my helmet when I'm doing errands around town and talking to people because it seems rude as fuck but sometimes I forget to put it on when I travel and if I'm unlucky enough to run into a bandit ambush my head is now a very easy target). And that feels FAIR to me, unlike games where I fail because I didn't minmax enough or seek out some specific piece of OP gear that would allow me to cheese the situation instead of making use of my own skills and abilities.

I think it says a lot that this is one of the only games where I have considered doing a playthrough in Hardcore Mode, a mode that some games will include that is clearly designed for masochists who hate fun. But somehow, the idea of KCD in hardcore mode actually sounds the opposite to me, forcing me to REALLY pay attention to the gameplay systems I've largely become able to ignore by the lategame (I've literally had the Balanced Diet perk active for ingame weeks because it's so easy to keep my hunger between 80-90 just by eating from food pots). Whether I actually go through with it depends on how easily distracted I am (read: very) because I may just want to move on and play other games by the time I finish, but I can still see myself giving it another go someday and trying for those last elusive achievements.

In the end, I feel like KCD is one of those games, like Shadow of Mordor, where I'd love to see other RPGs take a page or two as reference. KCD's historical realism is one of the main things that sets it apart from your typical fantasy RPG, but I also think fantasy RPGs could benefit from those realistic elements (not just the need to eat/drink/sleep but also stuff like longer-lasting injuries, not being able to heal mid-combat, or people actually remembering and being pissed at you if you just robbed them blind the night before). But until that day comes, I'll settle for a KCD sequel.

—————————————— Divinity: Original Sin 2 (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Unfinished ——————————————

I shouldn't even be playing this, since I've not yet finished the first one (still plan to, someday...I think I was like 2/3 through where I left off), but I grabbed it a little while back in a sale and started playing it with a friend.

As of this writing we're only just about to get off the introductory island and presumably end the first major story arc, so it's not really enough for a proper rating. However, it feels more or less like the first game, with a little more polish. The gameplay is pretty much exactly the same, and the writing has that same level of not taking itself too seriously. Feels like the kind of sequel that's basically 'it's the same core game but with a new story to tell', which isn't a bad thing, since the original was already quite good.

One major difference is that the characters seem more interesting this time around. In the first game, aside from the main duo that were basically just your own blank slate characters, you only had four other choices for your remaining two party members. I picked the mage and the archer since my main duo were a rogue and warrior type and I didn't want role overlap, but while the mage had a pretty robust and interesting backstory I thought the archer was a bit dull by comparison...and apparently that's because she and the rogue NPC were only added to the game later, so they weren't quite as enjoyably fleshed out as the mage and the warrior (who I didn't take). And even then, their stories felt a bit more...background? Sure, their personal quests tied into yours and you'd unravel bits and pieces along the way to help them resolve their own problems, but it never felt terribly integrated into the adventure of my main duo.

This time around, all the characters on the cover art are possible traveling companions with their own in-depth stories...but what's more, you can also choose to play as any one of them (or go the same route as the first game and just be your own character without a premade backstory). For my game with my friend we chose to play as two of the default characters, and are trying hard to stick to roleplaying in line with their backgrounds (and, also, villainous scoundrels). The interesting thing is that when you go that route you occasionally get in-character dialogue options that correspond to your character's backstory, in addition to the usual options. So while you're on one hand roleplaying as the character however you see fit, you also have the chance to explore the background story the creators envisioned for a particular NPC at the same time.

Again, I'm not really far enough to judge things like the story (though I am already a bit sick of how much has revolved around the dude I killed in the first story arc of the first game, like a thousand in-universe years before this game), but overall it feels like pretty much the same game as the first, just...a sequel. And again, that's not a bad thing. It's also fun to be doing it this time around in co-op, since the first game was so very clearly intended to be played that way too, but I was going it solo and just controlling both of the main characters (which made the occasional chances for disagreements between them very silly). Basically, if you like the first game, you'll probably like the second, but if you were hoping for something a little bit different than the first, you'd be disappointed.

—————————————— Conan Exiles (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Once again, I've been pulled in by a free weekend.

I'd heard various things about Conan Exiles...praise, complaints, and a lot of jokes about dick physics. But I've also been vaguely interested in it for seeming like ARK, minus the dinosaurs, but with the kind of satisfying third-person combat mechanics I like. So when it had a free (4-day!) weekend just before the start of the Steam holiday sale, I thought, why not give it a try?

I'll tell you why not - because it's ARK, minus the dinosaurs, but with the kind of satisfying third-person combat mechanics I like. In other words, the perfect ingredients to get me addicted to yet another survival/building game.

Now, I know next to nothing about Conan lore, but I also knew next to nothing about LoTR and I still had a blast playing Shadow of Mordor, so I knew that sometimes not having an extensive background of the source material can be okay. Conan Exiles is apparently extremely faithful to the original stories, and there is actually a LOT of lore sprinkled throughout the game. It's not unlike ARK's explorer notes, except they're all in English so I can actually read and understand them (turns out it's more engaging to read lore about a game within the game itself than on a wiki - who knew!!). And despite being an open-world survival/building game, it's also apparently got a concrete storyline with a concrete ending, which is pretty unheard of in this genre, so that's kinda cool.

At the moment I've only been playing in singleplayer. For the duration of the free weekend I chose to play completely vanilla - I don't like to mod games until I know the basic mechanics (so I know what sorts of things I'd LIKE to mod), but I also didn't touch any of the multipliers or anything either. I found the defaults a lot more forgiving than ARK's, but definitely still grindy. Once I decided to buy I started installing a couple mods and bumped my multipliers a bit. By that time I already had my current base built (though I'm thinking of moving) so I started just flying around in admin mode and building other stuff, particularly with modded structures (the Egyptian-style building kit was a lot of fun to play with).

The building mechanics are basically the same as ARK's, but refined and generally feel smoother. The snap points can still be a bit finicky but things seem to go where I want them to a lot more often than with ARK, and I've had a LOT less problems with my ceilings. The fact that the base game includes triangle pieces and didn't need to buy out a very popular mod to include them is also a plus. There's a bit more variety in pieces, too, like several different styles of roofing - not to mention the wealth of decoration items in the base game. Because of that this game seems to have a strong appeal to roleplayers, but to me it strongly appeals to my childhood fascination with LEGO and building crazy structures that I would then furnish and decorate with my other small non-LEGO toys. With ARK, unless you're lucky enough to find a server with a bunch of eco's mods, decoration options are sparse, so I really do appreciate all the clutter items the base game gives me to play with (and of course there are also mods that add hundreds more).

Then comes the part where the game feels like a totally different animal from ARK - general exploration and combat. In ARK, the main gameplay loop is taming stronger and stronger dinosaurs to perform harvesting tasks for you and to fight other dinosaurs or players. You can station them around your base to keep it safe from intruders, or start breeding OP ones to take into the boss arenas. The whole appeal of the game is to tame and ride dinosaurs, so aside from your first hour or so trying to survive on foot that's basically what you'll be using for all your traveling and fighting needs.

Of course, one of the main gameplay loops in Conan Exiles is capturing NPCs and having them run your crafting stations and guard your base, not unlike raising your dinos, and you can even capture baby animals and raise them as companions. But while you can bring (one) thrall or animal follower along with you on journeys, for the most part you are alone in these harsh lands surviving by your own skills. The most recent update introduced horses, but the riding controls leave a lot to be desired at the moment so I've mostly just been walking across the land on foot...which is harsh, and makes you really think about what you need when you set off on a long journey from home (food, water, healing items, tools, weapons, stuff to repair your equipment with if it breaks...and all of that stuff weighs you down if you haven't buffed your encumbrance, so coming back with your arms full of loot can be tricky).

While it can be a bit of a pain when you're accustomed to mount-based traveling in games like ARK, it does also solve one of ARK's biggest problems IMO - once you get a flier, you will never want to use anything else, and you can just avoid 99% of the danger on the map by flying everywhere. It's a problem I've started going out of my way to circumvent, but in Conan Exiles it's the default state. Even if they flesh out and improve mounts more, I think it'd be a bit awkward compared to solo traveling because the map is designed in such a way that you'll have to climb a lot of places, and I think that makes it a bit refreshing compared to ARK's 'you can get almost everywhere better and more safely on a dino's back so why would you ever risk otherwise' gameplay.

There's also a lot of fighting, and in my experience mounted combat is almost never good in any game that attempts it - especially if said game (like Conan Exiles) has a robust system of combos and dodging/blocking for normal combat, but mounted combat basically has to boil down to wildly swinging your weapon while also trying to maneuver around and both HIT the enemy and also not get hit BY the enemy. Seriously, the only game that I've played that did mounted combat RIGHT was Assassin's Creed Origins, because there were also mounted enemies everywhere, the horse was very easy to maneuver, and you got different weapon animations on horseback so you didn't have to deal with weird hitbox issues while trying to flail your weapon around blindly like an idiot. Also your horse actually did trample damage instead of ghosting through anything that crossed its hooves. Rant aside, I feel like it's the kind of game that was so thoroughly designed WITHOUT mounts in mind that having mounts would only make it feel weird, and running barefoot across the sand is an inherent part of the experience.

What I was going to say before I went off on a tangent was that combat in ARK - because you rely so heavily on your mounts - basically boils down to 'one button to chomp, one button to stomp'. If you're lucky the dino may even have a THIRD type of chomp/stomp/tail whip. It's very much a mash-attack-to-win affair where the stats of your creature matter more than your actual skill, which, to be fair, it's a game where breeding creatures with ideal stats IS part of the appeal so that's fine. But it can get a little boring to just go around on a rex and kill anything with a few chomps, where your only other 'ability' is a roar that's basically just cosmetic and has no special function.

Conan Exiles' combat is more of an actual feature of the game than a simple consequence of 'needing' to be able to hunt and kill things for the sake of survival and resource gathering. It's all about mixing up your light and heavy combos, of which different weapons have different types and also attack speeds. Different weapons may also have different abilities, like inflicting bleeding damage or slowing your enemy down. Which weapon you choose can come down to personal preference or experience, or it could be situational depending on where you're going and what you're planning to fight. For the first half of my playtime I basically stuck to dual-wielding daggers (dat bleed damage) but reached a point where I wanted something one-handed so I could use a shield and block arrows, or hold a torch when delving into caves and other dark places and still see what was attacking me. So I picked up an axe off a dead enemy and, despite being a lower tier than my steel daggers, was doing WAY more damage. Suddenly I felt like a God, mowing down an entire pirate ship full of enemies effortlessly when before I'd have to dodge out of the way long enough to eat some food and recover my health a bit while the bleeding damage slowly ticked away at them. From what I've read online, two-handed swords or pikes are 'the best' weapons, but I'm quite happy with my axe and my shield, and it makes me feel very fittingly barbarian-y as I hack my enemies to pieces, see them driven before me, and yadda yadda that one famous Conan quote.

As far as story progression and whatnot goes, I've only done the first dungeon and basically I'm just running around capturing thralls, pets, and looking for cool locations to build stuff. While I do think it's neat that the game has an actual 'progression' and a conclusive ending, I'm not too worried about it because that's not the reason I (or assumedly most people) play games like this. I'll probably get to it eventually...then again, I had more than 1000 hours in ARK before I fought a boss for the first time, so we'll see. I'm already starting to get a bit bored with singleplayer since I've started abusing my admin powers a bit too much, so I'd like to look for a decent server soon that's got some of the mods I like, but also won't force me into roleplaying with strangers. Ideally I'd love to be able to play with friends, but I don't know if any of my ARK friends would like it because it lacks the dinosaur appeal...so I might just have to venture off into the world by myself and...ugh. Talk to people, I guess.

Either way I am having fun, and I can see myself probably coming back to it when I just wanna chill out and BUILD something, much like I do in ARK.

#sg2 plays video games #sg2's game reviews #now to figure out how to boil down these term paper essay tier reviews into something more fit for a twitter thread #usually I just write these for my own archival purposes anyway so it's not like I expect anyone to bother reading them #but I just can't be satisfied letting the images speak for themselves and I don't know how to NOT ramble and overshare about my experiences

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dlamp-dictator · 5 years

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Allen Rambles About Three Houses

So last week I finished up my Black Eagles playthrough of Fire Emblem Three Houses. It was... okay. It wasn’t great. I had a few issues with the pacing how quick the plot move to the final battles and the lack of build-up for the big climaxes in the last few chapters, but I had a good time overall. Still, I was left unsatisfied. Between Fates, Echoes, and even Warriors, I think I enjoyed this game the most, but also had the most uncertainty with.

Fates was a fun game with fun mechanics and fun customization options if you were willing to grind for it, but also had the worst stories and narratives. Echoes had the best story out of the three, but had some game mechanics I really wasn’t a fan of like dungeon stamina and enemy AI nonsense. And Warriors was just fun fanservice as a fan of Dynasty Warriors, but was overall boring and repetitive after completing the story mode.

Three Houses honestly succeeds in every category so far. It has an engaging story, fun gameplay mechanics with a lot of customization options, and a lot of fun interactions and cute moments in it. But even so, I still can’t help but have issues with it.

So... I want to talk about that for a bit. I want to cover what I like and what I dislike about this game so far. Just talk a little bit with the fanbase to see where my feelings and thoughts are compared to everyone else’s.

But first, as always, a synopsis for those unfamiliar with Three Housed.

Fire Emblem Three Houses is a strategy game for the Nintendo Switch and the 16th game in the franchise. This game in particular focuses on three heirs to three different nations on the continent of Fodlan. The proud and commanding Edelgard of the Adrestian Empire who has great ambitions for her nation and its people despite how radical and blasphemous her manifesto seems. The kind well-mannered Dimitri of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus who’s smile and inviting nature hides a dark and maleficent past that still haunts and eats away at him to this day. And the easy-going and playful Claude of the Leicester Alliance who always seems to be planning something more sinister and malicious than his devil may care attitude shows. These 3 heirs all go to the same military academy at the Garreg Mach Monastery, both a religious and military center where the church resides. Together they enjoy school life, interact with students and classmates, compete in friendly competition, and learn the ways of war together. However, as political events, social changes, and possible wars erupting, the three friends are tested and eventually break part, now pointing their blades at each other for their own beliefs and goals. And as violence is all but certain as the years tick by, all the three can do is wait until they’re forced to kill each other for their beliefs, their goals, and their countries.

You play as none of these characters.

Instead, you play as Byleth, a new professor at the academy and former mercenary. You choose one of the Three Houses to teach and become wrapped up in their machinations as the plot thickens. How you train your students and ready them for the real world for the trials to come is all in your hands.

So... with that all said and the plot laid out, I think I should start with my issues first in the say way I did my quick thoughts. Just so I can at least end this on a good note after all my nitpicks and issues.

With that said, I’m going to start small and first cover...

Things That Only Annoy Allen

So last time I tried to write this I had to make my first “small” grievance into it’s own part. I’ll try and keep this short since I really want to keep this to the actual small stuff:

I don’t like Byleth’s female design. I’ll go into detail later but for now just know the lacy stockings are distracting for the wrong reasons.

There’s no female brawling class and it bugs me greatly due to Petra’s and Ingrid’s high speed growths. They could be some extremely high DPS infantry in the right hands with those things, but there’s no really class to take advantage of that aside from maybe Swordmaster.

More for story reasons than anything, I wish there was an in-game limit to how many students you could have join your class. About 3 students per House if I had to put a number on it for reasons I’ll explain later. This isn’t an issue, but it’s something I’d like.

Magic only being accessible for certain classes bugs me. I understand the in-game reason for this as a physical unit that could use some emergency (if very weak) magic after losing weapons or fighting armored units would honestly break the game even further than it can be now, but still.

Something I might mention later, but after watching a Blue Lions playthrough by one of my favorite Let’s Players I feel that the game should had limited which House we could join first, as my Black Eagles playthrough would had been more fulfilling learning of some things I’ve learned in that Blue Lions run.

Class mastery should be tied to levels instead of as a separate experience bar. I understand why that’s done, mostly keep people from really min-maxing classes and abilities, but it’s still annoying in terms of optimization.

Edelgard, the only female lord, is the only bisexual lord. Now I’m not in the LGBTQA+ community, but as a gamer and self-proclaimed degenerate I know that denying the yaoi fangirls a male gay option for a main character is... suspicious, given the lovable bisexual rouge of Niles in Fates, and it clear that Claude could had easily been a bisexual option as well given his personality. Again, not in the LGBTQA+ community or trying to play the social justice card, but it is making me raise eyebrows toward the games marketing and aimed demographics.

Byleth in general just... bugs me as a character, but I’ll get to that later.

...

And now it’s later, so let’s get to talking about the main thing that bugs me with Three Houses, and that’s...

Byleth

I don’t like Byleth. I don’t like Byleth at all. I namely don’t like how they were executed, but the fact that we have another avatar character after how well Echoes worked as a story without a self-insert character, I’m just... baffled. I’ll try and break this down a little.

Byleth’s Design

I really don’t Byleth’s design, namely the female design. The male version looks fine, if a little too black for my tastes, but the female version is trying way too hard to look sexy. This only makes me mad because both Awakening and Fates had female avatars that didn’t look overly sexy or obviously pandering to the male gaze. They were just the female version of the male version’s outfit. Maybe there was some more boobs and hips because female, but it was mostly forgivable.

And look, I’m not prude, far from it. Senran Kagura is one of my favorite video game series (cautiously hyped about Yumi being in Cross Tag BTW). Rumble Roses is a guilty pleasure I play every so often. One of my favorite anime is freaking Koihime, aka ‘Ikkitousen but better EVERYONE is a girl.’ I’m not saying you can’t have a sexy character or a bunch of sexy characters in a game or piece of media. However, that character should at least have a sexy personality to go with it. And with Byleth, who has the personality of cardboard has been with her mercenary father all her life fighting for her life, it doesn’t feel like she would actively be trying to look sexy since she doesn’t have the personality for it, or a personality at all. She looks less like a mercenary or teacher and more like Manuela forced her into some lacy stockings to make her branch out...

Huh, that would be a good paralogue/support conversation, but I’m not about to rewrite the game just for my satisfaction... yet.

If you want my quick armchair redesign ideas in terms of design I’d just stick her in Male Byleth’s armor, maybe have a more pronounced/noticeable skirt instead of a long shirt, and dear God get rid of those lacy stockings. Byleth is suppose to be a mercenary that’s only known battle with her father, the Ashen Demon that rarely shows their emotions, not a sexy fashion model. The Enlightened One model is it’s own mess, but this section ate up enough of my time already so I’m moving on.

Byleth’s Personality

Again, Byleth having the personality of a damn rock really kills my attachment to the character. They don’t speak or emote beyond generic level up phrases and crit quotes.

Which is a shame because Byleth has some really good crit quotes.

However, from what Jeralt and other students say about Byleth I can gather that their someone that’s often quiet and standoffish. They don’t speak unless prompted to or needs to interject. They tend to observe more than act, even more so after they gain the ability to rewind time, but have a razor-sharp and deadly focus when in combat. And despite their distant nature, they do care about their students, friends, and family quite a lot, willing to break the emotionless Ashen Demon persona to crack a smile even now and then, even completely showing deadpan shock when something surprising or appalling is said, as rare as it happens.

This is literally Yu Narukami’s personality in Persona 4 the Animation.

And that anime not only gave Yu Narukami more agency and personality than the self-insert the game made him out as, it also gave him a lot of a good back-and-forth with his friends and cast at large.

youtube

Seriously, this could had been Byleth if they bothered to let them speak and actively interact more independently, and it would had been great.

But that aside, I’m moving on to something a little more important, which is...

Byleth’s Importance

[Spoilers for the Black Eagles Route Ahead]

Again, I’ve only played the Black Eagle’s route, so maybe this changes in the other Houses, but Byleth seems way too important for his own good when we have 3 other “main” characters. He’s the crux of a lot of events and it doesn’t feel deserved or built up to well enough. In the Black Eagle’s path, you’re the one that convinces the class to work with Edelgard instead of Edelgard just explaining herself before the class of her goals. You’re the one leading the Black Eagle Strike Force instead of Edelgard or Hubert taking command and leading after years of not having the professor around and having to survive the war on their own. You’re the one that Rhea has a personal vengeance for instead of the woman that torn the church apart with both words of steel and blades of iron. And you just randomly find out that your the progenitor god from Edelgard and Hubert toward the very end. It feels really anti-climactic, but I also get the feeling that we were suppose to play Edelgard’s route last, something I’ll save for later.

Among other things, I just feel that the focus on Byleth stagnants Edelgard’s character a lot. I want to see Edelgard struggle with the fact that her ideals, while noble in concept, are dragging the world in the flames of war and that she’s seen more as a tyrant than a savior, but instead we focus on Byleth’s mysterious birth and power after being gone for five years. This game, at least on the Black Eagle route, was so damn close to telling a really good war drama, but backpedals due to Byleth’s existence and perceived importance.

Sothis

[Spoilers for Mid-Game Ahead]

I wish she was more active in the story. Nothing too big, but if I had to deal with emotionless rock that is Byleth, I’d like to have seen Sothis sprinkling her commentary on everything they did. Just imagine Sothis sassing Byleth about how their always eat lunch with their students. Her commenting on the fish they catch. Her giving additional small hints about who owns certain lost items after failing so many times to give the right item to someone. Her sassing every student in their support with Byleth on C-rank. Her telling you to go to sleep when you run out of activity points. It’d add a lot to her character and it’d make the moment later in the game when you no longer have her voice around feel more impactful. Imagine catching a big fish after fusing with her and... hearing nothing about it how big a catch it was. Imagine trying to give Ingrid a lost sword for the fifth time, hoping to hear a hint from Sothis and... you hear nothing.

Again, just an armchair idea, but at least that way when Byleth is being a plank of wood we’ll have Sothis to add some literal flavor text to everything they do.

Ah, but that’s enough about Byleth, let’s move on to something a little more important. Like...

The Gameplay

Thankfully, my issue with the gameplay are more nitpicks if anything, and I can actually have this in list form too.

As I mentioned in my quick thoughts, I feel like late-game/master classes are more of a pain to gain than most others. A lot of them need to have some heavy grinding in a stat you didn’t likely need to worry about before. Mortal Savant requires you to heavily grind either a physical class in magic or a magical class in swords, something that you likely didn’t do. Speaking of magic, it’s annoying that for all the customization in this game only certain classes can use magic. It makes raising a Mortal Savant or a more physical Holy/Dark Knight a nightmare. Again, I understand why this was done, but it’s annoying all the same.

Gender-restrictions, as I also said in my Quick Thoughts, are just dumb. Fates had removed this and it was great to have the freedom to give my male units the ability to become Falcon Knights, or my Female units to be... Okay, I only played Fates and Echoes, but the fact still remains that not being able to make a female Grappler/War Master or a male Falcon Knight really sucks and limits me quite a bit. Especially the inability to make Lysithea a Dark Mage. It’s practically wrong.

A lot of these maps have the same issue that Echoes had. They’re big and have a lot of enemies, but not much creativity to them. Okay, they have some thought put into them, more than Echoes anyway, but a lot of them still just feel like big fields that need at least three flying units to be manageable. Again, I’ve only played the Black Eagle route so there might be some more interesting maps in the other routes, but from what I’ve played there was no real strategy to these maps outside of baiting enemies and maneuvering around traps. I think there were probably only two maps that weren’t giant mazes or an empty field with a lot of enemies in them.

To the point above, this made slow moving armored classes almost completely useless. What point is there in having a slow tank on maps that span to what feels like 60X60 tile maps? Plus the maze-like design? Yeah, I don’t know how these maps were meant to be interesting.

And that’s it for gameplay issues. Moving on to...

The Story

Again, something that can be put into list form due to the story having more nitpicks than actual issues:

[Spoilers for Black Eagles Route Ahead]

The split decision to join Edelgard or not is dumb, as is the requirement to have the option available. I think it’s foolish to think we wouldn’t agree with her after listening to her manifesto for so long, especially if you played a Blue Lions route and seeing how Sylvain and Ingrid were screwed over due to their Crests, or just... Lysithea’s background in general. I can’t argue with her beliefs, only her execution.

The Flame Emperor reveal was... really anti-climatic. As if, again, they assumed we’d do Black Eagles last. Playing this route first just leads to a lot of anti-climatic reveals, especially on Edelgard’s route.

I just really wish Edelgard came clean with her classmates and commanders at some point in the story, to just tell them all that she was experimented on as a child and had two Crests as a result. That she wants to eliminate the nobility and Crests as a symbol of statu because of the harm it does to people both on top and on the bottom of the social food chain. It’d give a lot more weight to her cause.

Again, most of my issues with the story come from Byleth having too much screen time and importance compared to Edelgard as a whole. Especially when I did the route where I chose to go with her.

Alright, I think that’s it for all of my nitpicks, all the major ones anyway. I think I finally move to...

The Good Things

Again, this will be in list form since a lot of the nicer parts about this game don’t need as much breakdown as the bad parts.

But anyway...

As much as I don’t find the late game reward in terms of class advancement, the mid and early game are great for experimentation. I've had a bunch of fun on my second playthrough with some creative builds. I might suffer a little in the late game due to not optimizing everything, but that’s managable.

As I also stated in my quick thoughts, dismounting is hilariously broken. The amazing amount of utility you get from being about to dismount once you reach a destination and then mount at the start of the new turn for free while also being safe from arrows and horse-effective weapons is hysterical. I honestly think this was a bug that just didn’t patch and that dismounting meant you were stuck with the lower movement for the rest of the turn, but God am I going to use it until they eventually patch it out.

I’ve got... issues with the Black Eagle route, at least the route I went through, but I’ve been watching a playthrough of the Blue Lions route and it’s everything I could have wanted in a Fire Emblem game and more. If you want to play a good story I recommend the Blue Lions as your first route.

But to cut the Black Eagles route some credit, a lot of Edelgard and Hubert’s A-Supports were probably some of the best I’ve seen in the series... though I’ve only played Fates and Echoes, so...

Speaking of supports all of them were done very well. Like I said, Edelgard and Hubert had great supports, but Lysithea, Petra, Caspar, and Dorothea had great supports as well.

A lot of the supports and voice acting are great. It’s a key reason as to why I like the supports so much. The Lords are especially great to hear and were directed well.

And... yeah, that’s all the good things. Don’t let the short length fool you, folks. Like I said before, my issues are more nitpicks. The game as a whole is just fine.

That said...

In the Future

As much as I want to, even as a fun little project, I think it’s a little arrogant of me to be making any rewrites or “improvement” to the current story of Three Houses. I have various reasons for this that I might go into depth to in a later Rambling, but the short version is as someone that’s struggle to write their own story I feel like a hypocrite for trying to “correct” another’s. However, I think it’s far game to make requests and bring forth ideas for a future title, especially since this one is selling so well. And so, before concluding I’d like to present a few things I hope to be in the next Fire Emblem game:

No Avatar Character

Like I said, I feel Byleth’s entire presence can ruin scenes due to his lack of personality and engagement. And as easy as it would be to give him one that would also mean the play losing their use self-insert character. To this I say it’s probably best to just not have an avatar/self-insert character to begin with. You can easily make a character that has the stats of an above-average all-rounder as your main character/lord while still having a personality. I think Echoes did this well enough with Alm and Celica, especially Celica if we’re talking stats and utility as a healer/magic/swordsman hybrid.

No Gender-Locked Classes

This is more of a personal desire than something that needs to happen, but if the next Fire Emblem game is going to give us this much customization then I’d really like to have complete control and not be restricted by gender, especially when we’re talking stats. A War Master Hilda would be wild. As would a Hero Petra, a Gremory Linhardt, a Dark Mage Lythesia, and so on. To restrict us is not only screwing people who want to make quirky builds, but also those that want to make optimal builds. Either remove the gender lock, or have these characters with more straight-forward classes like in Fates.

One/Limited Routes

Again, I haven’t played Blue Lions or Golden Deer yet, but the Black Eagles route had a branching path that I honestly think shouldn’t have existed. Maybe this was for reasons I can only guess at, but the story of the Black Eagles Route I was on felt very rushed, or at least it assumed I had played either the other Houses or the “canon” Black Eagles route first. That left the actual story, while I personally found engaging, very rushed and underwhelming at the end. In the future I’m hoping for either one path, or for alternate paths to be locked until you complete the other “main” ones that give a fuller story, because a lot of what I’m seeing in the Blue Lions playthrough I’m watching would had been nice to learn in the Black Eagles route to see Edelgards view of things.

Smaller Maps

Like I said, the maps in Three Houses are a little too large, especially with slower armored/magic units in the early game with only 4 movement. In the next game I’m hoping for either smaller maps or at least maps that accommodate for that slow movement of early game and saving the bigger maps for when you’d naturally have some cavalry and infantry units with 5 movement. I think Fates’ Conquest and Revelations maps did this perfectly.

Brawling Weapons

No real critique here. I just really like the gauntlets and I hope they come back in the next game.

Conclusion

Overall, I think Three Houses is a good game, despite all my nitpicks. I hope the next game will be even better and hopefully have some of the things I want to see. I recommend this for anyone with a Switch wanting to play a decent strategy game.

Anyway, I got a draft to make on that story I’m writing, as well as draft up another Rambling. See you all later!

#fire emblem #fire emblem three houses #your dictator is speaking

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rkrosememories · 5 years

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hello everyone, i hope you’re all well. happy rkfifth! five years, that’s a fair portion of time, half a decade in fact! i was contemplating on whether i wanted to write up one of these posts, as i usually do something similar when my own personal anniversary with rookies comes around, but for the sake of this being the big ol’ 5, i’m willing to do it. let’s take a walk down memory lane shall we and see where it all began for little ol’ me ( i got a job interview today, yay! )

i joined the krp community in august 2014, and rookies was one of those rps i considered joining, and a part of me wishes i did. i didn’t though, i found the large size of the roleplay to be somewhat intimidating so i ended up going on to make my own idol themed roleplay; which was fairly successful in its own way! ( r.i.p apollokrp ). but, i did end up meeting steph there, and eventually, i would end up being convinced to join rookies in july 2015; bringing forth my first rk muse, rkseokmin ( that’s dokyeom of seventeen, btw ). he didn’t last for long, and neither did my other two muses rkkyungri ( yes, i roleplayed kyungri prior to this, looking back, she was sort of like rkrose, being from australia and all ) and rksana, who i brought to rookies in july 2015 and december 2015. and now, looking back i don’t really have any strong attachments to these muses, i think i really just brought them in on a whim, and it wouldn’t be until the following year that i truly found my place at rookies.

come may 2016, season three of the mgas had begun and i decided to give rookies another go. damn rp! pulling me in and trying to get me invested! this time round, i brought forth a muse which y’all will definitely be familiar with. rkjuyeon, who was known as rkseo back then. and for anyone newer, that’s rksaercm. it all began with her, my tall dancing gay who had ambitions of idoldom since a young age. she had auditioned with her cousin in a process called the deathmatches ( you guys, if you weren’t around during like ... early 2016, you won’t know the pain of reserving / applying etc. as the old main blog was ancient. anyways, bless the rookies team for keeping everything going for so long ) and she failed to make it through. meanwhile, her cousin ends up winning the whole goddamn program. what a fluke. i did end up dropping her though, although she did return a few months later in september!

and we fast forward to july 2016; enter rkrose. blackpink’s iconic dance practice video was released and instantly fell in love, with one member in particular ( everyone was ranting and raving about lisa, but i couldn’t take my eyes off of the girl with braids in her hair ). that girl, was park chaeyoung, who like me, is a fellow australian! i instantly knew that i had to bring her to rookies, along with rose and keith ( who play lisa and jisoo, and eventually lari would end up completing the rkblackpink lineup that we know today with jennie ). looking back, i don’t really know how i envisioned rkrose to be; i mean, she was signed to royal within her first six months of being at rookies! she won the kt & royal contest, if ya didn’t know! she is probably the muse i am most well-known for, likely for not so good reasons. she’s been through countless “scandals” in her time, things of which are likely both of our faults. i’m not ashamed of her though ( more so of my own actions ). i think she’s a good egg.

when rookies gave us permission to go ahead with third muses, i think we all went a little crazy. i’ve had quite a few third muses, some whom i’m sure i can’t really remember, but rkchangkyun and yugyeomrk come to mind; i’m sure some of you might be baffled to know that i’ve ever actually roleplayed a male before, considering the fact that all i talk about on twitter is girls and girl groups. ah i forgot i did actually bring rkclaudia to rookies, aka moon hyuna. but we come full circle, and in march 2018, we meet rkkyungri, who is my third and final muse at rookies ( unless y’know, y’all wanna open up fourth muses to the public rk, because i’m down for that, i have many stories to share still wink wonk ). she was unlike any of my rookies muses; an ex-idol who failed at achieving her dream the first time round.

so, here we are, december 2018; i’ve given you a rather comprehensive and detailed run down on my past with rookies, muses wise that is, because there is a ton more to talk about. and i shall, because i want to be able to commemorate this special occasion! i think it is healthy to reflect on things that have happened in the past, so we can learn from our mistakes and better ourselves as people and writers. i have had my fair share of negative and positive experiences at rookies, and i think it’s normal to. rookies is a really big place, and people are bound to bump heads and not get along, that’s just human nature. i think that a good portion of my problems at rookies have been because of miscommunication. so new members, please take a leaf out of my book and remember that communication is key! also don’t get swept up in ooc drama and take your problems to the mods! that’s what they’re here for ( and they do an excellent job of it, thank you guys <33 ).

i really am invested in rookies; invested in the plot, the characters and their stories. i think it’s so amazing that we have a place on the internet where things can unfold and happen in real time almost. krp can be so fast-paced and it’s refreshing to see a place like rookies. i don’t think i could ever truly leave rookies behind, well, one day i’m probably going to have to, but that is another thing; rk is always there. rookies has reached five years. five! years! and that is a momentous occasion, because some rps don’t even see five months. as someone who has been an admin countless of times in the past, i have always wondered how rookies withstood the test of time, and now, having been apart of rookies for nearly three years, i think i understand now. many things go into making a roleplay work: the admin team and the members must work cohesively together, and i think we at rookies all do a good job of that.

i have learnt a lot at rookies, and i think i definitely have a lot more to learn and experience. i must say, going into the new year, i really want to work on being more productive. some of you amaze me! replying every week, getting those points! you get that, pal! it’s really, really inspiring, and i want to be more like that. i’m honestly amazed i’ve made it two years at rk, as i’m someone who gets bored easily ( i also have commitment issues to some extent ). there have been countless occasions where i’ve wanted to give up and drop my muses, be it lack of motivation or drama, but the sole fact that i’ve dedicated two whole years to creating these characters is an incentive to keep going. i’ve always loved writing and i love that i have a space to share my creativity, interests and dreams with like minded people! i think that rings true for a lot of other people, but i’m sure y’all have your own reasons for sticking around.

i don’t think a post like this would be complete without some shout outs, but this part for me will probably be lacking, whoops. maybe i can make that another goal of mine. socialise more.

steph ( @jungwooxrk ), thank you for introducing me to rookies and convincing me to join. we’ve been friends since december 2014!?! which feels like a long ass time. you were my first real internet friend and i’m very grateful to of met you. thank you for writing with me and putting up with me!

rose ( @rklisa ), keith ( @rkjisoo ) & lari ( @rkjennie ), rkblackpink is precious and means so much to both me and rkrose. although we don’t talk as much as much as i would like ( or we should??? ) i’m so happy that we’ve got y’all, i hope that our girls can experience many more things together.

shinobi ( @rkkangjoon ) thank you so much for putting up with me. we’ve been through a lot of crap but i’m really thankful that we’re still able to talk despite everything. i hope you know that kangjoon will forever be important to rose, he was her first real boyfriend after all! thank you for putting up with us both! we love you! <33

peach ( @rkhaechan ) i don’t think rkrose would be who she is today without you and the help of jaebum. after a year of depression i think she’s back on her feet though!! toughest 12 months as a writer! but, despite everything we’ve been through, i’m so thankful we’re still able to talk. i also love your new muses, haech is a cutie & i love him very much :((((

lemon ( @rkyena ) aaaaaah i can’t believe i forgot to put you in here, i’m so sorry. thank you sO MUCH for putting up with me and my forgetfullness. i really love seoyoung as a muse and i’m excited to see her grow as an idol! also saeseo?!

nana ( @younghyunrk ) i’m so thankful that i get to talk to you almost everyday!? i feel as though these past few months we’ve been able to get close which is exciting because you are awesome & i treasure you a ton! i’m excited for whats to come in the following months for our muses! hopefully we meet when i fly over your way sometime soon! i love youuu!!! <33

royal and sphere trainees! i would tag you all, but i’ll be here forever. thank you for making me feel included, even if i don’t participate in the group chat! i love our group antics, like photocard swapping, that was fun. thank you for taking care of both me and my girls, rose and saerom. i would like to work on getting closer to y’all!

and our incredible mod team, you know who they are, they know who they are. thank you so much, for everything you do. you guys keep this place safe, happy and running for all of us, all while writing for your own muses and keeping up with real life stuff like work and school?! incredible! amazing! fantastic! thank you for being so accepting and welcoming and supportive. i love y’all a ton and i don’t think this little message truly explains how grateful i truly am. thank you, for all that you do.

i’m sorry if i forgot anyone in particular, i probably did and i’m sorry; i don’t have the greatest memory. just know that i’m grateful for you! even if we’ve never spoken to eachother before! thank you for making rookies the place it is! that being said, i should probably work on wrapping this whole thing up, since it’s getting pretty darn long and i would like to do some things today prior to this job interview i have later ( please send positive vibes, i’m going to need them ; _ ; )

these past two, nearly three years have been absolutely wonderful. i’m bummed i didn’t join rk back in the day but maybe the fact that i joined later was a good thing? i mean, everything happens for a reason right? these years have been hard and tiring but also very exciting and rewarding, and i’m very enthused to see where 2019 takes me and my girls, along with you and your muses! lets work hard and be happy, happy rkfifth everyone <3

- lots of love, from sacha!

#♡ ┋ out of character.#rkfifth

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lucarioisinthevoid · 5 years

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*cracks neck* OKAY JERRY we're gonna perform a ritual to summon a portal to the void so i can ask henry what the FUCK the question mark tag bullshit is about. take this saltshaker and pour its on me while i balance this spoon on my nose. make sure to do it directly in the center of the pizzeria.

Henrywas standing up a bit straighter, confused. “What- what is happening? What arethey trying to do there?!” “They are trying to open a portal to the void to ask you what the FUCK thequestionmark tag means!” “I got that far, thank you VERY much. I meant, WHY are they opening a portalfrom the restaurant, instead of coming here? They are ruining my plans! Aninterference like that, this amount of distortion near my machine will-““Maybe that is why they do it?” “No- NO, NO- I will NOT allow that-“ Angrily he moved forwards. “I have TAKENthe boy. I PUT him where the others were-“ Something seemed to snap in him. “The machine may not be stable, but I assureyou, I refuse to play along in this disgusting charade any longer. I am sick ofthis, I am sick of ALL of this! Of these nonsensical Anons! Of these emptyconversations! Of the fact that you are BREATHING! No more. I will break thisreality once and for all.” “U-Uh, Henry you-“ Ignoring the kid, he walked towards the machine, booting it up. “I havegathered so many soul fragments. Do you even UNDERSTAND how hard it is toextract souls out of things that shatter? Out of all those little passions- itwas work, too much work to have it all go to waste because of one foolish anon.What is there so hard to grasp? Jeremy. Jeremy ? Is it truly Jeremy? NO IT ISNOT. THAT WAS OBVIOUS! To be fair- it was probably… hm… 13%. Which is a goodbit, compared to the… others. But it took quite a toll on him, did it not? Itchanged him up a lot. He did a few favors for me… the Puppet is out, the PhoneGuy is out- I have PLANNED, I have CREATED and now it is supposed to be alldestroyed? No. I will take all of it with me.” “… I´m mildly concerned.” “Rightfully so.” The machine began blinking and beeping. “I have planned awhole finale. I have planned out a showdown. I have planned so many things andnow THIS anon…” He sighed. “Does not matter. Time to see what my work can do.” Reality tore.-

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!”

“BOYS AND GIRLS!”

“GATHER ‘ROUD, GATHER ‘ROUND!”

“SIT BACK, RELAX AND PLEASE STAY AT YOUR SEATS!”

The spotlights lit up and wandered around, searching for the people screamingtheir lungs out, which was rather unnecessary, seeing as they were alreadyenhanced by the speakers at the sides. What came out was a rather unpleasantstatic mess.

“FOR TODAY YOU’RE AT THE ONE AND ONLY!”

“THE LEGENDARY!”

“THE MYTHICAL!”

“THE INCOMPREHENDABLE!”

“WORLD OF OLD SPORT!”

“Wait, that’s not what we agreed to say-“ The spotlight found the two, Old Sport, who was wearing something close to asuit and Dave, in Springbonnie. Actually, that Springbonnie looked… patched up.They proceed to argue. “But Sportsy! You’re the main attraction!” “No, Dave, not everybody is-“Another Old Sport proceeded to walk on stage. “Excuse me, but what in the actual fuck-“A painful smashing sound was audible in the background, together withtrademarked swearing. “WHO IN THE ACTUAL FUCK DID PUT THE FUCKING LIGHTS OUT, ISWEAR TO GOD THIS PLACE IS A FUCKING SHITHOLE, THIS IS HELL-“ “Uh. Mike. I think we have a bigger problem then the, uh… lights.” A pause ensued after Phone Guy said that, followed by Mike’s reaction to the happenings on the stage.“OH FUCK NO.” “W-wait, was that another Phone Guy?” Phone Guy asked.“IF YOU’RE FUCKING WITH ME I WILL LITERALLY KILL YOU-“ Jeremy joined. “F-found the light switch! Everybody calm down!”All the lights turned back on and everyone was stunned. There were three clonesit seemed- a Phone Guy, an Orange Guy and a Purple Guy, all standing around, inblank terror.Lies, actually the Zombie-bunny was screaming. “TWO OLD SPORTS?! HOLY FUCKIN’SHIT! THIS IS INSANE! I AM IN HEAVEN!” This triggered the other Dave to protectively hold his Old Sport. “Back off, yafilthy copy! This one’s mine!” For a moment things calmed down, as nobody knew how to react. Until a new voice joined, voice only- Well, actually most of them knew, even if they haven’t heard it in decades. “Well, well, well. A universe rift thatapparently entailed multiple dimensions to be sucked in. How utterly predictable and boring.” Henry looked around, displeased beyond words. “No wonder it iswhat the kid went with.”To my defense, what else was I supposed to do?“Anything! Everything! Something!” With these words he managed to exclaim allhis distaste for this. Both Dave were just falling over, seemingly dead and while the Old Sport in suittried to help his partner, his counterpart froze up completely. The Phone Guys both let out some distressed beeping. This situation was toomuch. Mike scoffed. “Oh luck, it’s the pink-peach-mc-fuck-me-sideways.” At that Henry snapped up. “What did you just say?” “I said you’re a fucking piece of shit.” “Oh, I simply misunderstood.” Relaxing again, he inspected the corridors going off the mainarea closer. Endless, gaping hallways, so long you could only see blackness instead of anyend to it. “… at least it appears we will not have to walk into each other thatmuch. Apparently the places combined in regards to space too. What a relief.” “Oh, Mr. Miller!” Jeremy sounded glad, as he ran up to him. “You are alright!You made it! I knew you would, but- what… what happened w-while… n-not gonna lie, I was… it was scary…” How does this kid even still exist afterhaving his soul literally fractioned and partially banned into the void-But this wasn’t really worth thinking about. Not now, maybe later when he had settled in.Turning away, Henry proceeded to walk down the corridors, met with ever similarrooms, but not minding it. At least he had plenty of access to parts and robotsnow. It felt as if the rooms grew colder the further away he would go. “So. How do you think you can handle this? Did you even think for five minutesabout this event?” Softly he scoffed at nothing in particular. A bit, I guess?It’s… basically just that for a certain amount of time, people can ask for allsort of whacky AU shit and meetings! And if they don’t ask for anyone in particular, like they usually do, I just…send the anon to the normal crew. “This is unimaginable pointless and nonsensical.” Finally picking a room, some sort of office, hesat down in the comfortable chair and booted up the camera system. While theold computer was booting up, he went through the papers at the side. Hm. Complaints, bills, people begging to be let in again they swear they won’tyiff the fox after the first time it was a one time thing, and……… a list.

HenryWilliam/DavePhone GuysThe PuppetAnimatronicsDoggosFredbearEveryone who ever set foot into thisplace

… Henry turned, looking almost baffled. “You are completely and utterly serious?” Bold of you to assume you were the worst the multiverse had to offer. “You are implying I am even attempting in any way to be evil. Which isnonsense. It just happens to be perceived like that by clueless onlookers. So,indeed you are correct, if there is somewhat out there in the universe deliberately WANTING to be as evil as humanly possible…” Trailing off, he putthe paper away. “Thankfully, this will be fruitless. This isn’t a place to tella story. You know that perfectly well.”Maybe I want to have a bit dramatic potential for once. “Your askers are far more interested in sending copy pastas.”Well, if that makes them happy! But I still wanna play around with the idea. Atleast for a short bit. “Great. Another set of pointless events, right after the first one. How utterlyentertaining.” Oh, shut it, your existence is pointless. “Only because you are a bad creator.”I will call a magic anon to seal your lips for the next hundred asks. “I am thoroughly intimidated by that threat and plead with all my being. Imaginehow utterly horrifying it would be to have a valid excuse NOT to interact withanons. Please spare me.” Well, at least Jerry is back. Now somebody gotta reactivate the Marionette.

#henry miller #old sport #Dave Miller #phone guy #Jeremy Fitzgerald #mike schmidt #kiddo #event time #Shit I hope this isn't too cheesy

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leah-ocarina · 5 years

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I see a lot of well-intending people saying aces are perfect angels according to society who never run into problems or get judged, because while we don’t get as much shit as some people, coming from the PoV of a panromantic and disabled woman who knows oppression when she sees it, let’s all just set aside the argument of whether or not Aces are LGBT, okay? Just put it out of your mind! This post is not about that, okay? I just want people to know a bit more about what it’s like, because I see them meaning absolutely no harm, but being a bit misinformed. I’ve taken points from another person who was calm and level headed (and can’t track down the post because I am inept at this website hnnnn), and thought I’d go through them.

Again, put the argument of ‘are aces LGBT’ out of your mind. This is about misinformation and not that— and this is definitely in NO WAY me saying asexuals have it worse or as even bad as/as other LGBT people, because we definitely do NOT. (That doesn’t mean we get nothing though!)

Okay. Now that that’s out of the way, the first few points will be from my personal experiences, and if it’s something I heard from someone else I have it clearly marked, and the numbered points are actual copy-pasted quotes from the person’s post:

1) An asexual person is not going to get dehumanized and beat up for not having sex

•Physical violence—Actually yes. We do get beaten up. We also are victims of corrective rape. •Dehumanizing—Dehumanizing is 90% of what people who know I’m asexual do. Things I have heard to me personally from multiple people (and from what I’ve seen, other aces hear the same things): • Inhuman monsters. •Nobody will EVER love you because of this. You’re unlovable in every way if you stay asexual (as though I can just change it 🙄) •It doesn’t matter whether or not YOU want to have sex if your partner does. Suck it up •You need to go to the doctor and get fixed •You need to go to therapy and get fixed •You’re broken and if you don’t go to the doctor, I don’t even know what to do with you

•If you say you’re a sex repulsed asexual/decide to never have sex (🙄) nobody will want to date/be with you. You’ll be alone forever and you’ll deserve it.

People verbally bullying us all the time with the intention of dehumanizing us is literally the main problem I’ve experienced. •A common one we get is that we’re really closeted gay people and we’re lying to ourselves that we have no sex drive (file under, large groups of people push that asexuality is a myth) •You’re confused and need to suck it up and have sex once so you’ll be cured (side note—also usually the rhetoric attackers use/directly say when corrective rape occurs) •You’re just a moron with a medical condition (I am disabled but none of it effects my sex drive) •If you don’t like sex you don’t even deserve to live because what else are you here for And again those bullet points are just what I’ve heard from multiple people of different backgrounds, and I’ve only identified as ace for two years

2) and if they do, it is less normalized than gay and lesbians getting beat.

•It’s almost like you don’t hear about it often because people tell us to shut up and stop being attention whores so we don’t talk about it as much, and when we do it doesn’t spread as far because less people with relevant blogs (exclusionists) reblog/share it 🤔🤔🤔 •Just because you haven’t heard about it often does not mean that it doesn’t happen often. This is not a popularity contest.

I know one may not think about what that quote actually means, but it invalidates violence/bullying against us NOT by saying it doesn’t happen, just that it’s less important than the other groups. I know you guys mean well, but you can’t really deny it 😕 If it counts for them and not for us that means when it happens to us it’s less important to you—if you disagree please do explain how saying it counts for one group and not the other does not make it less important! Seriously! I want to understand! I just can’t see how “it counts and is impactful to my opinion of them, but not for you” can be taken a different way.

^^^ Also to be clear I mean the exact way it has been phrased here and not the general rhetoric. The normal rhetoric is that it doesn’t happen as often (which it doesn’t) so it doesn’t count. (Debatable, but not what this post is for. Take that argument to the reblogs of another post or one of its own.) The rhetoric in this quote is that even if it happens (which also implies this person didn’t even check 😒) it’s less normalized (which I assume means they hadn’t heard about it) and since they didn’t personally see it that’s why it doesn’t count.

3) If you don't have sexual attraction, cool, but the differences still exists. There are cultures and religions who praise those who stay with abstinence.

•What they actually praise is waiting for marriage. I never experienced this because I don’t go to church regularly (they’re all hellfire and brimstone where I live so I don’t bother 😑), but since looking at asexual tags and such, I’ve seen a bunch of stories from different, otherwise unrelated people that if they tell their priest, etc. they’re ace, they get lectured about how no. They HAVE to have sex after they’re married because that’s the way God intended it to be. You’re required to, and not doing so goes against God. They genuinely throw fits about it and try to get you to change your mind. I was floored when I found out and even more floored when I saw how many people have experienced this (a few said they were saying they were ace in response for calls for abstinence and got an earful), but it seems like they want you to either never have sex because you devoted yourself to God (nun, etc.) or because you waited. After your married though, you’re expected to and judged for not having sex.

4) heterosexuals who call people faggots will call asexuals.. virgins.

•You must have a pretty tolerant group of people you interact with, because that is definitely not what we normally get called lmao. Normally we get called broken, freaks, mentally ill/crazy/someone who needs to take their pills (I’m serious), inhuman, monsters, unlovable, and honestly they just use asexual as the insult too. Like “You don’t know anything you asexual freak!” They’ll point, laugh, look around, tell their friends, then they join in and repeat. They also call us “losers who can’t get laid” [and are making an excuse]. I have never once been referred to as just a virgin in response to my asexuality, and I’ve never seen it anywhere online either. I’m tryna stay as neutral as possible, but this one is just straight up incorrect/really rare.

5) A bonus-- not something I heard from the same person, but still really important----Sexuality is about who you love, not how often you fuck.

This one I got from someone more hostile, and I’ll it admit I was a little baffled by this. This is not the case for all asexuals because it is a spectrum, but I personally am sex repulsed and could never be in a long term relationship with someone who is going to expect sex out of me. Asexuals like me (of which there are many) are extremely limited in who we can be in a relationship with because we need to find other asexuals (which btw causes a lot of mental distress because it makes us feel extremely broken and unlovable). This very clearly determines who we love and saying otherwise is...well if after you read this you still think that way it’s just willful ignorance if I’m honest. :\ Again this was not from someone level headed, but I thought I’d include it to explain it to other people who think the same thing!

So thank you for coming to my Ted Talk lol. I’m not trying to fire up exclusionist battles or arguments about whether or not asexuals are LGBT, I’m just trying to clear up some of the most common myths about asexuality I see.

#Ace discourse #Asexual #asexuality #tw rape #rape mention #rape #tw bullying #bullying

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looselucy · 6 years

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February

It was February 3rd. Officially reading week. I sat with my arms folded on the settee, my nostrils flaring as Mike happily skipped out of the front door after saying his goodbyes. I knew Zayn was soon to follow. “I can’t believe you’re going to stay here on your own.” He mumbled, zipping up his bag on top of the table. “You know if I wasn’t going on holiday, I’d stay in a heartbeat. Or at least invite you to mine.” “I know you would. But it’s fine, don’t worry.”

There wasn’t a chance in hell I was going to go home and live with my dad for a week. I needed to keep myself as uninvolved in that mess as much as I could, so I had decided to stay. I didn’t care that I was going to be on my own, I didn’t care that the university had literally asked us to leave, I was staying put. Zayn was going on a family holiday with his mum and his little sister, or else I would have tagged along with him, but unfortunately it just wasn’t an option. He slung his bag over his shoulder and heaved out the biggest sigh of all time as he looked down to me. “You good?” He asked as casually as he could. “Always. Now go have a good time. Text me though, yeah?” “Of course.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Love you loads, Pip. Stay safe.” He scurried off down the corridor and we waved sweetly to one another as he went. He’d been on holiday for just over a week, and I was really happy for him, but I also knew I would miss him terribly. I’d had my time to get used to the idea of being on my own, and at the same time as dreading it, I was looking forward to it. I was a bag of mixed emotions, to be honest. My phone started ringing, and seeing it was Ed meant that I answered pretty quickly. “Hiiii!” I grinned, happy he was in touch. “Pip, I’ve got some bad news.” I rolled my eyes and groaned outwards, knowing that this was just my luck to be honest. Of course he had bad news. I expected nothing less at this point. “Go on.” I tutted. “We’ve just had a guy come into our halls and tell us we need to leave today. Like, need to leave because of these viewings. They’re gunna kick us out, Pip.” Ed hadn’t planned to go home either. He told me he was supposed to be going to stay with his mum, but really didn’t want to. He was going to stick around too, he was going to be my company for the week. That plan had just been shot in the foot thanks to his news. “No way?” I cried. “I know! So I’m going to stay with Brad who I live with. You got plans?” “No. Shit. Fuck. Alright, no, it’s good, I’ll figure something out.” “You sure?” “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll text you in a bit, okay?” I sighed. “You sure?” “Yeah it’s good. Speak soon.” “Alright. Love you, Pip.” “Love you too.” I hung up and growled towards the ceiling, knowing that if they were round at Ed’s building, it wouldn’t be long before they reached ours preaching the same thing. But I refused to go home. I hadn’t even told either of my parents about reading week, so they weren’t expecting me. There was no way I was going to go, not a chance. I had to be selfish, for myself, I just had to be. To my surprise, I heard a bedroom door open. I knew it had to be Harry. I thought he had already gone, but he was only one I hadn’t seen leave, so it had to be him. I had barely said two words to him since our awful encounter on the night of the 16th of January. What were we supposed to say? He hadn’t apologised, nor had I. We were completely lost around each other, we ignored each other, we continued our lives like the other didn’t exist even though we lived together. It was surreal. He caught sight of me in the kitchen, and gave me a really confused look, questioning why I was still there. “What… What’s going on?” He asked quietly. That was probably the most he had said to me since that night. I choked up on my words for a second, unsure how to act around him. I couldn’t help but remember how scared he made me just over two weeks before. “I-I was gunna stay, but Ed just rang saying they’re practically kicking people out so... I’m a bit screwed.” “Oh.” I cleared my throat and looked anywhere but in his eyes, even though he was staring at me pretty intently. I had grown past the point of being angry with him, wanting to fight, wanting to argue; it was exhausting, and I had enough weighing me down without us constantly being at one another’s throats. It wasn’t worth my energy. Even having him looking at me like that, felt tiring. “Do you need a lift... somewhere?” He asked awkwardly. “What?” “I-I could give you a lift, if you want one. Or need one.” “Since when did you drive?” I baffled. “I umm... I got a car for Christmas.” “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” “I didn’t wanna... brag, or anything.” I found that strange. If you had asked me, I would have told you that would be the first thing Harry would have done, to brag about it. I swallowed my pride a little, knowing it had been over a month since Harry got his car and this was the first I’d heard of it. “Oh. Well... I don’t really know where I’m going.” I mumbled. “Well, we’ll head my way, and maybe... decide as we go.” I had no idea what to say. The thought of being in a car with Harry for any length of time made me feel a little nauseous, to be honest. I was completely trapped for options, but that was exceedingly unappealing. “I don’t-” I tried. “I know things have been awful between us, I know that, and I know it’s my fault and for that, I’m sorry. But, you can’t stay here. And if you get a train this late on, it’s gunna cost you a fortune so... I dunno. I’m just offering you a lift, I guess.” I figured that was as good as my apology from him was going to get, and in all honesty, I appreciated it. The main thing was, I knew something had flipped in Harry. I knew I had said something or done something specific that triggered Harry to react the way he had. I wasn’t expecting any kind of apology, and what he had given me was enough. He was also completely right, I couldn’t stay, and getting a train would set my money back more than I wanted, and I wouldn’t even know where to get the train to. Getting a lift with Harry would give me time to make my mind up, think what the hell I could do? I played with my fingers underneath my thumb, which searched over the skin like looking for more moisture, my throat had completely dried up too. “I don’t have anything packed.” I mumbled. “I’ll wait.” He said sternly, with a flippant shrug. I shakily nodded and swallowed hard, getting up to my feet and almost jogging off to my room. As soon as I was locked safely away, it was like I was completely breathless, like I had done a ten-mile run. I was so nervous about spending time alone with him, nervous about where I was going to end up. I really wanted to stay put. Fuck, I really wanted to stay put. I threw some clothes into a bag, trustworthy clothes that I wore as often as I could without coming across as unclean, and threw in my bottle of water which usually stayed on my desk, knowing that there was a possibility of me ending up in the wilderness, fighting for my life, like Bear Grylls. Of course, I actually knew that wasn’t very likely, but the thought of it was pretty exciting, and I knew I would need water so I didn’t end up drinking my own piss. I shrugged off my thoughts of spending a week in Heaton Park and Bear Grylls, and threw in the few vital things I would need into a pretty sizable pink bag that I could throw over my shoulder, then finally walked out of my room, spotting Harry waiting patiently in the kitchen doorway as I locked up behind myself. I didn’t really care that I had left my room in a bit of a state, even though they asked us to clean up after ourselves. As far as I was concerned, I was paying to live there, and they were kicking me out without a second thought. They would just have to deal with it being a mess. Idiots. I took a deep breath in, they looked up to Harry with a cashmere smile, hardly even able to comprehend the fact I was just about to spend at least two hours with Harry Styles. It wasn’t exactly how I wanted to spend my day. “You ready?” He asked. “Yeah.” I mumbled, with a lump fixed in my throat. He tried to smile but dropped his head and hid the show of dimples to the floor, like he was embarrassed or something. I lingered outside my door until Harry passed me, and then I began following him out of the building like a duckling following its mother, my head down the entire time. It was ridiculously cold outside, it stung my skin and stiffened my entire body as Harry lead the way to the carpark. I noticed how he always seemed to have a stride in his steps. Harry didn’t just walk down a street, he strolled down the street like he owned it. It was one of the few things I admired about him. That. The reason behind his fight with Josh. And his dimples. That was about it. Harry approached a small black car, which looked brand new. If it was bought second-hand, it was still new-ish. He pressed the button on his keys and it flashed open. “Here.” He spoke deeply. He held out his hand, offering to take my bag off me and throw it in the boot whilst he was round there chucking his own in. “Thanks.” I said, taking it off my shoulder. He took it from me and walked round to the back, and just through manners and sheer awkwardness, I lingered by the passenger door, waiting for him to come round and get in first before I got in myself. I really wanted to talk to him. I really wanted to know how to have a normal conversation with him, but it seemed too much had happened between us, too much had gone on. One too many arguments, one too many fall outs. I had to, for once, put my faith in Harry. He was bound to be better than me, he was bound to be able to get a conversation flowing between us, even if it was just for the car journey, and then we could go back to being awkward. We both got in in time with one another, and Harry started up the engine, glancing to me once without saying anything before he pulled out of the carpark and we went on our way. Pretty quickly, he leant and tapped on the glovebox in front of me. “I’ve got a few CD’s in there. Your call.” Even with that, he was making as much of an effort as he physically could. Also, having the choice of music was all good by me. I opened the box up and looked at his pretty stellar collection, leaning in close so I could read the titles. “So, do you have every Fleetwood Mac album?” I asked with a smile. “Actually, no, I don’t.” He smirked. “I’m missing Mirage. But I think that’s it.” I had known he liked Fleetwood Mac after the one time I went into his room and saw the Rumours poster, but this confirmed a super-fan. “I’ve never really liked them.” I lied. “WHAT?” He whipped his head to face me. “Are you joking? They’re one of the greatest bands of all time. Hands down. Lindsey Buckingham is a genius. Lindsey and Stevie should have ended up together. Kills me that they didn’t.” “They are a power couple.” I forgot to go along with my act. “YOU DO LIKE FLEETWOOD MAC!” “Obviously. They remind me of my childhood. Like, this CD collection was literally in my dads car! Any car journey, Fleetwood Mac. Every time.” “I’m seeing them live.” He could barely speak because of his grin. “Are you serious?” The conversation was flowing to the point where I almost forgot it was actually Harry I was speaking to. It was nice, normal, natural. “Yeah.” He couldn’t keep the smile off his face. “I have to wait ‘til November though and it’s killing me.” “Oh shit. I feel so sorry for you. Having to wait to see Fleetwood Mac. Fuck off.” He laughed, his eyes fixed on the wheel, his hands loose and casual on the steering wheel. I’m glad I turned round to see him then, because his whole body completely relaxed, and thanks to that, so did mine. The only thing about us being so casual with one another, was that I knew it would spur us to speak about us, what had gone on, what the hell was going on now. Yeah, it was a conversation that needed to happen, but ignoring it had worked out pretty well. I guess. Maybe... It wasn’t working out at all. “Now I know you love Fleetwood Mac, I’m going to brag about it forever.” He smiled. “Thanks. Looking forward to it.” The silence I had been expecting cast a dark shadow within the car, and we both cleared our throats in time with one another, which made us both glance to our sides and laugh coyly. I knew it would be Harry who delved into it, so I let him. “Are we okay?” He asked. “Probably not.” I said honestly. “Nice pretending we are though.” “But I want to be.” He enforced. “Why?” “Because I think you’re really sound, actually, though it pains me to admit it.” “Then why the hell did you basically attack me the other week?” That slipped out of my mouth without me even thinking about it. In a weird way, I hadn’t really wanted to say anything about it. I was glad we’d carried on like it hadn’t happened. After speaking about it with Ringo, there hadn’t been another word said. I hadn’t even told Zayn. The occurrence was like some strange nightmare, one that really haunts you for a while, then you let yourself forget about it, but in some rare moments before you slip in slumber fully, it comes back to you, just for a split second. Talking about it felt taboo, forbidden. He didn’t say anything for a little while. “Sorry. I guess, I just... I flipped. A little.” “A little?” I scoffed. “You flipped too! If that door hadn’t been in the way, you’d have hit me or something. No doubt in my mind. Or yours, I imagine.” “I’m a girl though!” I tried. “That’s the worst argument I’ve ever heard. Fuck gender. It doesn’t even matter.” “Fine! But you flipped out a lot worse than I did.” “I know I did and I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry.” The engine took over our yelling as we fell into another spell of quietude, both of us breathless and shocked. Arguments and fall outs were always so easy and natural when it came to me and Harry, but he had made some valid points, which proved to me yet again, we were more a lot more similar than I cared for. I’d acted out that night too. It proved to me how much I needed to change, how much I needed to grow up. I knew this realisation would happen at university, I guess I just wasn’t expecting those exact events to spur such a change in me. I swallowed my pride before I spoke. “I’m sorry too.” We came to a stop at some traffic lights before we would get onto the motorway, and he looked at me. I don’t think either of us had really planned to give an apology, even though we both deserved and owed them. I just wanted to move on from that night, and I knew he did too. “What’s wrong with us?” He half chuckled. I grabbed Fleetwood Macs first album, pressing eject and putting a Rolling Stones CD back in the correct case, then putting FM in, relaxing to the sounds of Monday Morning. “I’ll tell you what’s wrong with us.” I sat back. “I’m stubborn as hell, and you rub me the wrong way. Same goes for you, probably. Living with people you love is hard enough, never mind people you hate.” He took a big gulp, his nose crinkled, his shoulders hunched, and I could tell something I had said had made him uneasy. “Do you really hate me?” He seemed saddened by the mere thought. I thought back to my beginning days with Harry, where he would have thrived off me saying that I hated him. But things had changed since then, we had real snippets of times where the two of us got on really well, Harry had grown so much closer with Zayn. Suddenly the thought of me hating him, wasn’t fun anymore. “No.” I told him honestly. “I don’t think I do.” “I don’t hate you either.” “Well... that’s good.” “Zayn would be proud of us.” He smiled again. “I feel like... maybe we should just sweep everything under the rug now. Just, start afresh.” I shrugged. “Hi.” He grinned, overly chirpy. “My na-” “DON’T bloody introduce yourself, you weirdo.” I laughed. He laughed happily along with me. It wasn’t just everything with Harry that I wanted to brush under the rug, it was most things. I needed a new, fresh start. I needed to turn a corner and not look back. It was my time to become an adult. To, yes, be upset about my parents situation, but to grow thanks to it, to not let it alter my life if any way other than being positive. I had to think and act like a mature adult. It probably wouldn’t happen overnight, but it would happen. “Alright, so tell me about yourself.” He egged on. “Huh?” “Give me some fun facts, or something. I can learn things about you and you can learn things about me and by the time I’m dropping you wherever we’re going, it’ll be like we’ve been friends for years.” I was thrown back to my first day at school, and my first day at the photography class I used to take, where you would have to go around the room giving out a fun fact and I could never think of anything even remotely interesting about myself. I felt that same pressure in that moment. “Oh god. I don’t know.” I mulled. “Umm. I have a dog.” “Nice! What’s its name?” “Timmy-Two.” “Timmy-Two?” “Well yeah, we had a dog called Timmy, but he died, god rest his soul. But I was only young so I forced my mum and dad to get another dog and said they had to call him Timmy-Two.” “A lot of alliteration going on in your family. That’s brilliant!” He chuckled. “Right?” “Definitely.” “A fun fact from you?” I quizzed. “Oh. Umm... I have a cat. Well, she doesn’t show her face much, but once every fortnight or so, she turns up, eats, and goes again.” “So you’re a cat person?” “Whichever one I’m around, I’m that person.” He said firmly. “If I’m around dogs, I’m definitely a dog person. But when I’m around cats, I’m a cat person. Either is good for me.” “So what if you’re around both?” “If I’m around both, I have a breakdown because of how happy I am.” I couldn’t believe how well we were doing. The fun facts game was actually working like an absolute charm, which I wasn’t really expecting. This game had never worked this well for me before. Finally, mine and Harry’s similarities weren’t clashing, they were helping us work. “That’s fair enough.” “Another fun fact from you now, Pip-Squeak. Go.” “I have a teddy called Lulu and it’s means more to me than most people do.” I hadn’t quite realised the serious conversation that that statement would stir. Harry looked uneasily across to me. “Why?” He asked, and it was obvious he really cared to know the answer. “Umm... my mum and dad weren’t actually married when I was born. They got married when I was eight. They’d always been together, but they weren’t married. They got it me as a kind of, wedding gift. Just... reminds me of them. I dunno. I think she means even more to me now... with all this going on.” No one else in my life knew that about me. Obviously, my family knew about Lulu the penguin, but they had no clue what it meant to me. Whereas most people, may have seen the teddy, but had no clue about the story behind it, no clue what it meant to me. I had just told Harry without a second thought. He took a while to compose himself, struggling with what to say. “I’m sorry… About what’s going on.” He mumbled after some time. “You were right. Families are fucked up.” I huffed. “I know, but, it’s horrible what you’re going through. Must be hard being away from it, too.” ”Are you kidding? It’s good to be away from it. I think even my mum and dad are glad I’m away from it. I’d hate to be in the middle of that. I can stay sane when I’m out of it. Why did you think I wasn’t going home?” “That’s why?” He baffled. “Yeah!” “Oh. I dunno. I genuinely thought on the drive back you would just be like, meh, alright, I’ll go home. So where the hell are you gunna go?” “I don’t know.” I was shrugging it off as much as I could. I could see the cogs going in Harry’s head, really whirring, and I genuinely knew what he was going to say before he even said it. “Stay at mine.” “Are you joking, Harry? We’ve been getting on for about five minutes. I can’t intrude in your life and your family for an entire week when we’re barely friends!” “Look, I’m not dropping you off on some street corner and wishing you well, it’s just not gunna happen!” “I really can’t stay with you, Harry. The offer is great, thank you, but I just can’t.” “Well you have under two hours to think of a better plan, and if you don’t, you’re crashing at mine. No ifs, ands or buts.” I began thinking where the hell I could go. We had already headed in the opposite direction of both Mike and Tally. There was also the massive component of the fact that I didn’t want to just intrude on people from home, like Katie or anyone like that. It wouldn’t be normal for me to just go to my hometown and rock up at a friends door, expecting them to just take me in. Besides that, our town was only small. There was every possibility I would bump into my parents, and then what was I supposed to say? It seemed that staying at Harry’s wasn’t just the sensible option, but the only option. “I just... don’t want us to overdo it.” I quaked. “Maybe we’re only okay around each other when it’s short periods of time.” “Well, we’ll never know unless we try?” He shrugged, eyes on the road. “Wouldn’t it be fucking hilarious if we got back after the break, being like, really pally with each other? Everyone would be so confused!” He was so amused by the entire idea of it, and to be fair, it was a funny thought. For everyone to get back, and have it gone from me and Harry barely looking at each other to being actual friends. I sucked in air through my teeth. “I just don’t know.” I moaned. “Right. Okay. Here’s the plan.” He started. “We’ll go out tonight, we can get really drunk, because we tend to be a little better when we’re drunk. I’ll introduce you to my friend Niall and his girlfriend, so if I’m driving you totally mad you can ignore me and talk to them. Still, if it goes really badly wrong, I’ll just drop you at the train station tomorrow, and you can go wherever. That’s a good plan.” That was it. That was the ultimate plan. If worse came to worse, and we genuinely couldn’t cope with one another, I could just leave and go wherever. I could go home, if I really had to. “I have to give it to you, Harold, that is a pretty good idea.” “So you’ll stay?” “What the fuck. I’m going to stay at Harry Styles’ for a week.” I baffled more to myself. “Who’da thought it?” He grinned. Who would? The entire plan was completely ridiculous, just because of who we were, the foundations of our relationships. Even though we had said it was a good idea, it was probably the worst idea possible. Me and Harry, purposefully spending an extended period of time together, through choice? Anyone would have told us we were mad. We were mad. But it was a done deal now. And the plan was to get drunk to deal with that. “Alright, another fun fact.” He demanded. “No, it’s your turn. I told you about Lulu. WHICH, by the way, no one knows about. So please don’t-” “Of course I won’t.” He acted like I was stupid for even asking. “Okay. Thanks. So, fun fact please.” “Umm... I hate uni.” “What?” I cried. I figured it was the curse of the room next door to mine. Grace had felt exactly the same, and she had left. It probably wouldn’t have been the worst thing to happen if Harry was to do the same, but it was shocking to hear. “Well, no. More my course, than anything.” I knew that, he didn’t need to say it. Harry suited the uni lifestyle down to a T. He liked going out, getting drunk, he liked girls and drugs and spending time with friends. Obviously it was the course. “Please don’t, I’m painfully jealous you do photography.” I groaned. “What?” “Yeah, that can be my fun fact. I love photography, so much. It’s the only thing I’m good at.” “Well, why aren’t you studying it?” He puzzled. “My mum and dad didn’t think it was a valid course so they told me they wouldn’t fund me unless I did something worthwhile. A real course, as they put it.” “That’s horrible!” He yelped. I forgot that it wasn’t something everyone knew about me. Zayn was aware of it, but not many other people at university were. It wasn’t that I kept it hidden on purpose, just that talking about it pained me. So I moved on, back to the original conversation. “Anyway, that’s not important. Why aren’t you enjoying it?” I asked. “Lack of freedom. Not what I wanted at all. Can’t help but wonder if it’s the same across the country. I’m gunna speak to Niall about it, actually. He’s doing photography at a different uni, so, if there’s more freedom at his... I dunno. Might need a change.” The curse of the room was real, I believed it. But for some reason, I wasn’t cheering about the thought of Harry leaving. Even though we didn’t really get on, you form a bond with the people you live with. I found it weird thinking that would be changed and altered again, as it had been when Grace left. I also knew full well I could end up with someone ten times worse than Harry. “I thought you had that meeting?” I asked. “Yeah, I did, but they haven’t got back to me yet. I’m keeping my fingers crossed though, ‘cause I really like everything else. But like... I can’t stay at uni for the fact I like Thimble and Zayn’s my best mate, know what I mean?” ”Actually, Zayn is my best mate.” I smirked. “Fuck off, Pip-Squeak.” He laughed. “But yeah, I know what you mean. Well let’s hope they listened to you.” “Yeah, lets.” Myself and Harry laughed and chatted together like the oldest of friends throughout the journey, completely bouncing off one another, natural and relaxed, even singing together, because we couldn’t help but belt out when ‘Say You Love Me’ started playing. That was it. Finally, we were friends. Harry let out a little excited squeal as we drove past the sign telling us we were finally in his home town, and I began to question, once again, what his family were like. He had a pretty dire view on families, so it seemed, but he was so overwhelmed and overjoyed about the fact he was home, I couldn’t help but think I was about to meet a very happy family. All I could do was wait, and it wouldn’t be long until I finally had my answers. I produced a smile, because I was happy for him. He was like an excited child. “We close?” I asked. “Very. Very very.” “Good.” He cleared his throat as I looked to him with a big smile, which dropped pretty quickly when I noticed his furrowed brows. He spoke his thoughts straight away. “Why do you think we got off on such a bad foot?” He asked simply. “You thought I was loud.” I smiled. “You are loud.” He told me. I hit his arm hard and he faked pain, then we both happily laughed together. It was almost like I had this sixth sense and I knew where his house was, because I could feel my stomach flip as soon as we pulled onto his street. I was always like that, meeting anyone’s family. When you meet peoples parents, you kind of have to act like you have your life together and you’re a great person for their child to be friends with. In all fairness, I was usually a hit with the parents. We pulled up outside a picture perfect house. Three floors, tall, thin, white, snuggled between two identical houses, bright green hedges shaped perfectly outside, which had to be near impossible since it was February, but there they were. We both got out pretty quickly, and Harry went round to the back of the car and grabbed our bags. I just stared up to the idyllic building in front of me. He passed over my bag and then walked down the short path, and I trailed happily behind. He knocked, and within a few seconds the door was swung open, a happy man pulling Harry into his arms straight away. “HEEEEY, YOU’RE HOME!” The man yelled. “I am!” Harry grinned as he pulled away. “Dad, this is Pippa. I was wondering if she’s okay to stay for the week?” “Of course she is! Of course, come on in. Pippa, was it?” “Yeah, hi.” I mumbled sweetly as we both stepped inside, Harry shrugging off his coat and draping it on the hangers next to the stairs. “Nice to meet you!” “You too!” Harry’s dad grinned. A couple of seconds later, another man sloped out of the one door at the back of the long, thin corridor, giving me a big smile as he did. “Pip, this is my... other dad.” Harry hushed. “Oh... Oh.” Of all the things I was expecting to be greeted with when I met Harry’s family, honestly, that scenario hadn’t crossed my mind. Not once.

#OKAY CHILL IT'S HERE #BB13 #HAVE to hear your thoughts on this one #Harry Styles #1dff

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