#queen catheter

[amireallythatcomplex]

Yesterday marked one year post Cauda Equina Syndrome diagnosis, and I had lots of cuddles from my Frenchie puppy because she knew I was upset. Then I went swimming (did my physio exercises, some walking and a tiny bit of "swimming") and walked around part of Decathlon with my mum and nieces. In the afternoon I drove (driving using hand controls rather than my legs feels so natural now) to my friend's and we went to Nando's and had a great time (and I showed off my new CESCI beanie). Then I did my first solo shop at Lidl in my wheelchair (and got soaked getting it in and out of my car).

I was stared at by lots of people whilst using my wheelchair, but I'm proud to use it. Being ambuplegic isn't bad, so why should I care if people comment on me moving my legs or getting out of my chair and taking it apart to put it in my car? Yes, I can walk, but it hurts, and sometimes isn't safe (like yesterday when it was raining badly and Lidl's floors were very slippy and I could've fallen if I'd gone in there on my crutches).

Now I'm in a fair bit of pain and pretty tired after such a busy day (for me, I did 1,342 steps and 1,501 pushes, smashing both my targets). Another positive is that I've been out of the house for the first time in months without wearing incontinence pads and not worried about having an accident because my bladder is getting stronger using the flipflow valve on the catheter, and the Peristeen bowel irrigation is working.

Now just to get through all the emotions today (and the coming week) is going to throw at me since it's the anniversary of my L5/S1 decompression (the surgeon said they were only able to remove about 80% of the compression off my spinal cord) and discectomy. And the potential PTSD caused by my stay on D8 at QMC Nottingham, especially after they nearly killed me with a latex catheter despite knowing about my latex allergy!

[grantairesdeadbody]

my hs science teacher of two years not only sleeping with my mom, but being her middle age lesbian awakeing is insane

[defilerwyrm]

Hey, trans guy here, and while I’m not personally interested in getting bottom surgery, I am interested in writing t4t erotica involving guys who have. Do you have any writing tips on that front or just stuff you wanna see from what I imagine is a pretty underserved niche?

Howdy and that’s awesome!

One thing that would be cool to see represented: not everyone who gets bottom surgery is a top! I’m sure not, though strangely my interest in playing that role has increased since I had the work done. You can be the biggest anal queen this side of Pornhub and still get bottom surgery. Only makes sense, right—if we can accept that having a dick doesn’t automatically make a cis man a top, the same is also true of trans men & transmascs.

Some things about a healed-up phallo dick from my experience, under a cut:

The head is VERY sensitive, and the base is very sensitive. Everything in between that has erotic sensation but in an “Mm that’s nice” kinda way until you add pressure too. Once it’s healed up, it is definitely possible to orgasm from stimulating it. How long that takes will vary, though. I was told it might be up to a year, but I have a crazy healing factor and had it back in like 2-3 months.

If you couldn’t successfully kill the hair follicles on a permanent basis via electrolysis and/or laser prior to surgery, there’ll be hair. (It’s not THAT weird. Plenty of cis men out there have hair on their shafts too!)

If you had a tattoo on your donor site, you’ve got a tattoo on your dick now, lol. It might be unrecognizable depending on where it was originally (especially on the inner wrist/forearm).

There’s a scar up the underside right in the middle and all around the base. The scar up the middle of your scrotum will look similar enough to the natural seam of an OEM scrotum that it’s not really notable.

The scrotum won’t have all the wrinkles an OEM one does at rest.

No foreskin, more’s the pity, but the head looks VERY much like a circumcised OEM penis once it’s healed.

Different donor sites tend to produce different results. The non-dominant forearm is preferred because they take a stretch of nerve with it and it’ll typically have the least subcutaneous fat, so you tend to get the best sensation and shape. With the back or thigh, bigger guys might end up with a Coke can cock, which cis men THINK they want but it’s a different story when it’s always that size.

Yep, it’s always the same size. Which means you’ve got something the size of an average-for-your-height erection at all times.

Without an implant, it’s quite floppy as you can imagine. If you manspread at all, you might have to shake a leg out when you stand up ‘cause your dick’ll go between your thighs, and you’ll notice real quick as soon as you start walking. Masturbation can be awkward depending on how you do it, but “double bagging” (wearing two condoms at once) will keep it stiff enough to top.

There are two types of implants you can get: a flexible rod made of silver encased in biostatic silicone that gets sutured to your pubic bone to make sure it stays in place (how metal is that?!), or an inflatable rod that has a pump & release in the scrotum. Look for “erectile dysfunction implant” if you’re researching these. With the former, you basically always have an erection, but it’s posable; not great if you wear a lot of Speedos, as my surgeon put it. With the latter, you choose when it stands up and when it lies down. These implants, along with testicular implants for those who get them, are always done at least 6-9 months after the initial surgery.

Recovery can be rough. I took 3 months off work and needed it. The first two and a half weeks were the worst because I had a suprapubic catheter in, and dear gods I hated being cathed. Felt like I had to pee at all times, even right after emptying the bag. Worth it, though, absolutely worth it.

If you do radial arm flap, you’ll end up with two scars aside from the ones on your groin: a rectangular graft that goes most of the way around (NOT all the way around; that leads to necrosis!) the forearm from the wrist to about halfway to the elbow; and a less-obvious rectangular scar shaped like an open book on the top of one thigh where they take a split-thickness (meaning, only part of the way down) skin donation for your arm graft. The graft is pretty obvious, especially if you’re chubby, but my leg scar is extremely subtle and continues to get fainter as my skin cycles itself out.

The graft will be forever hairless.

People will probably glance at the graft, and they might stare if they’re rude, but in the…what’s it been, almost two years I’ve had it, exactly one person has actually asked about it and that was when it was still fresh and extra gnarly-looking. I told her “It’s a graft, it’s not as bad as it looks” and there were no follow-up questions.

Because there’s nerve harvested from the inside of the forearm, sensation comes to the penis faster than it comes to the graft. The cut nerve DOES regrow! But for the first…I’d say 6-9 months? Ish? I could only feel pressure on the tissue UNDER the graft. Sensation is still duller there, but at this point I can feel temperature, moisture, and texture well enough.

Recovery includes physical therapy for the donor arm. The more you move that wrist early and consistently, the less stiff it will be when it heals. I’ll never be able to touch my thumb to my wrist again, but I also can’t do that on the right either now, so I think that’s more to do with my age than the surgery (I used to be a lot more hypermobile, but I am no longer a spring chicken).

Learning to pee standing up is a messy affair that involves cleaning the toilet and doing laundry a lot. Once you’ve got it down, though, it’s pretty awesome.

Chasers will now ghost me the instant they find out I am not biologically available to be their sexual experiment.

There are a LOT of other options for bottom surgery, but I only have passing familiarity with them based on hearing firsthand accounts and what I learned from my surgeon. Personally, I weighed meta vs phallo heavily; being able to get a natural erection with meta or Centurion was a very attractive prospect, but it just doesn’t produce a size that I would find satisfying in terms of my own self-image, so I went with phallo. There was never a question in my mind as to wanting vaginectomy with it. Beyond the unbelievable convenience of being able to pee standing up without an STP device, I fuckin’ HATED my front hole, and I REALLY hated being pressured about having things done to it (mostly by cis men, but not always) all the time.

[demigoddessqueens]

Please excuse my rambling!! I talk too much 😅😅😅 I hope this is okay!💜

Hii! Can I please request a Namor x fem!nurse!reader where she’s a traveling nurse, and travels all around the world for her job. She happens to be on the beach that is right above where Talokan is. She wanders around the beach and happens to accidentally wander into Namor’s cave at the same time that Nakia stabbed the Talokanil guard before escaping. Y/n finds the girl and one, is shook because she has never seen Talokanil people, Y/n is only human, but she quickly works on getting the girl stable and saves her life. Namor finds her saving the guard’s life and is surprised at a surface dweller having compassion for his people, so he shows her compassion back. He shows her the wonders of his Kingdom, and for the first time, finds himself having feelings for a surface dweller. He asks her to stay with him, saying that he could make it to where she can breathe underwater, live as long as he does, and that she would be his Queen and he’d spoil her and show her so much love: She says yes. 🥰 The two fall deeper and deeper in love as time goes on🥰

Okay a) this is adorable as heck?!! 🥹💕😭💞

b) this reminds me of Dracula and Lisa from Castlevania so much

C) he’s waiting for you to call on the shell-phone

i think i might like you

A/N: also posted here on ao3, words ~1.2k

EDIT - A/N: a very loonnng overdue fic

Tagging @namorwife @deliciousfestsalad @omgsuperstarg @beautifulsoulsublime @historygeekqueen @rosestoophelia @urlocallsimp

There were those close to you who had been with you since the start of this mobile clinic. And in this moment, you wished you could be back in the mainland with them right now.

The figure that stood before you kept his steely-eyes gaze on you, just waiting for any movement from you.

Damn your good-natured heart and inquisitive nature that compelled you to explore. It made you superb in your abilities to heal others, but there was always the catch in the most dire situations. The young woman before you needed aid and fast.

“Who are you, to trespass here?!”

“I was just passing by—please, she needs help—I can heal her.”

A quavering response from you would only suffice for now.

“I have had enough of the surface world and your lies—!”

“No! I swear! I’m not lying. Please! Just let me help and then you can decide what to do with me.

You waited for him to speak. The one who stood in front with the elongated spear waited for Namor’s command before he nodded. As soon as the spear lowered, you set off to tend to the wounded individual.

A spare IV bag and catheter luckily were on your person. Spare bandages were given to stop the bleeding. You did not think much of it, but you spoke out what steps you were taking to heal this woman, a chant of sorts to show that you meant no ill will and to ease your nerves.

Within a few minutes, the young woman regained her breath and gulped down as much air as she could. You let out the sigh of relief that you dodn't reealie you had been holding in. Feeling a tug at the edge of your clothes, you felt yourself plummet backwards against the cool stone of the floor. The one who you assumed was the

"If you leave this instant, I would not be so generous as to those who entered my kingdom last! Leave while you still have your life intact!"

In a few hurried breaths of "I'm leaving, I'm sorry", you scrambled to your feet and left faster than when you arrived. You never looked back for a split second until you were back aboard your mobile home.

Sleep did not come easy to you that night and when morning came, you saw the same man from before.

He looked at you with a matter-of-fact expression as he had rummaged through the medical supplies you had kept, noting said lack of defenses.

”You carry no weapons with you.”

“N-no, my line of work doesn’t require it.., and I’m not a fan of it as a nurse…”

Looking you up and down, the man circled around to observe you with an inquisitive nature. Every clink of the ornate spear in his hand made you flinch, but you hid the effect it was having on your nerves.

”…it means I’m a healer, I help people along this coast who need assistance…”

Stopping in front of you, the proximity of his intense gaze made you feel like a deer in the headlights.

“I am familiar with healers, though I still find your placement and occupation quite odd. But I do extend my gratitude for you upon reviving one of my guardsmen.

”Yes, you’re welcome—I mean thank you…?”

“You may call me Namor. And I will return tomorrow. I wish to speak with you more on matters.”

As soon as he finished speaking, Namor dove beneath the waves. And before you had a chance to respond, you caught the faintest ripples underneath as he swam away.

Though the conversation you had with Namor had been short, you looked forward to seeing him soon.

After that day, you waited with bated breath to see if he would hold true to his promise. Your mind was racing with a thousand thoughts on what to do next. Do you need to defend yourself? Should you relent and just radio everyone else in the mainland? Can you--?

A ripple away from you signaled that he may have honored his part of the deal. You could see the few tufts of curls rising from the water’s stillness before Namor rose from the water. You let out the sigh of relief that you didn't realize was being held in suspense for long.

"It would be shameful conduct to not uphold my end of an agreement, and for that I apologize."

You greeted his response with a small smile, and against your better judgment, invited this mysterious man aboard your barge.

From that day forward, the one called Namor continued to visit at the end of each week. Then it was every other day, until everyday of the week for a while. And each time, you noticed a small wound or scrape that this king had for you to tend to.

A sparring session gone wrong. An unfortunate event with a wandering sea creature. A close call in battle against the Wakandan army that left him greatly incapacitated

You don't know why, but for some reason you were grateful that Namor had survived the ordeal and still came to see you.

There were other days were you two just talked about anything, even the most boring mundane things you never paid much attention to until he brought it up. Though there were choice words about the songs you didn’t realize you were humming that made you blush.

Endless nights that mentioned your people that you had found through this line of work, his family and those of the people he cared for. You knew what he meant upon hearing the noted softness in his tone.

"I....lost some people close to me. For a short while a few years back, and I was alone for a while--. I know why you do what you do for your people, and I understand why you’re so protective of everyone.

He noted the softness laced in your tone of voice. Gently placing a hand atop yours, you were taken aback by the concerned expression across his face.

“I protect that and those which I find most dear in my world. And in this one.”

Heat rose to your cheeks as you pieced together the implications of his words. Thigh you both wanted to kiss each other, settling for a touch instead was enough for now.

It was only the beginning for you two after that night. Namor couldn’t imagine a day gone by that didn’t involve at least seeing you once, nor could you imagine the same. You looked forward to just any time together.

There was the kiss you shared with each other under the stars. The first time you stayed together for the night. And it all led to this moment that you welcomed inevitably.

The day Namor offered you the bit of herb that led to the creation of his people. You accepted without hesitation, and dove beneath the waves with him as it burned through your body. Sealed with a kiss as the current carried you both away, Namor held his love and new Queen of Talokan in his arms as one does for priceless treasure.

[houseofbrat]

Did Kate have emergency brain surgery?

Remember this?

Back in 2011, Kate was suspected of wearing hair extensions.

The spokesmen at St. James Palace--clearly better than the current crop at Kensington Palace--said it was a scar.

Shimmering in silver, the Duchess of Cambridge conducted her first solo engagement as a royal yesterday – and displayed a hitherto unknown childhood secret. Underneath Kate’s stylish half-up, half-down hairstyle a prominent three-inch scar could be seen on the side of her left temple. A spokesman for the Duchess at St James’s Palace confirmed last night that it was the result of surgery as a young child. ‘The scar related to a childhood operation,’ they said. The palace declined to discuss what kind of operation because it was, they said, a private matter.  Senior royal sources also confirmed that it had been ‘a very serious operation’ but declined to comment further.

Some people speculate that Kate had a VP shunt placed during this surgery.

What Is a VP Shunt? A ventriculoperitoneal (VP) shunt is a thin plastic tube that helps drain extra cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) from the brain. CSF is the saltwater that surrounds and cushions the brain and spinal cord. Why Are VP Shunts Placed? VP shunts are placed to treat hydrocephalus. Hydrocephalus (hi-droh-SEF-eh-less) happens when CSF does not drain out of the hollow spaces inside the brain (called ventricles) as it should. VP shunts drain the extra fluid and help prevent pressure from getting too high in the brain.

How Do VP Shunts Work? Most shunts have two catheters (small, thin tubes) connected by a valve. One end of the upstream catheter is in a ventricle. The other end of the downstream catheter is in the peritoneal (pair-et-NEE-ul) cavity. This is the space inside the belly where the stomach and the bowels are. The shunt is all inside the body, under the skin. The valve opens when the pressure in the brain gets too high. This lets fluid drain from the brain into the peritoneal space. From there, the extra fluid is absorbed into the bloodstream.

[...]

Are There Any Risks From VP Shunts? VP shunts are generally safe, but there are some risks during and after the surgery. There can be bleeding, or an infection can develop. VP shunts do not work forever. When the shunt stops working: * The child can have another buildup of fluid in the brain. * Another surgery is needed to fix it. Problems with a VP shunt happen even with regular care and at unpredictable times. The shunt can get worn out or move as a child grows. A shunt also can get infected, which can be very serious. It's important for families to follow the surgeon's instructions for when to call and when to go to the ER. This way, treatment for an infected or worn-out shunt can start as soon as possible.

Rebecca English's article continues:

John Scurr, consultant surgeon at the Lister Hospital in London, said it was unlikely to have been the result of a tumour. ‘I really doubt it was any serious medical condition and I would say it is as a result of an arteriovenous malformation – a birthmark – being removed, ‘ he said. ‘It is remarkable, given the measurement, that no-one has noticed before.’

Katie Nicholl has a different surgery story regarding Kate when she was at Marlborough:

In her book Kate: The Future Queen, royal expert and biographer Katie Nicholl relays the story, which is just terrifying. Apparently, during Kate's time at Marlborough, she discovered a lump on the left side of her head. The school called Kate's mom, who promptly took her to the doctor. That doctor ordered an emergency operation to remove the lump. "I can remember the incident and her having an operation," Ann Patching, who worked at Marlborough for years, told Nicholl. "I don’t recall anything happening on the hockey pitch [field] that had anything to do with the lump. Catherine had the operation during her term time. She was back at school very soon afterwards. As usual, nothing was too much of a big deal for her. You could never accuse Catherine of being a drama queen, but Carole was very worried, as any mother would be." The evidence of Kate's emergency operation is still around today, in the form of a scar on her hairline that you can still spot in pictures of the Duchess.

So, is the real medical issue that Kate had an emergency admission to a hospital on 28 December 2023? Had an emergency operation and then went home thinking everything was fine.

Then a few weeks later she had serious, post-op complications and had to go back into have things re-done at The London Clinic? In an emergency situation?

That the Spanish reporter was correct she was in a coma, intubated, and with doctors fearing that she would die?

"Water on the brain," aka hydrocephalus is a serious issue and can kill.

Of course, still have to wonder if there were prior contributing factors such as "overwork."

[lostcryptids]

…. When I saw that Roy’s dick didn’t fit in that catheter I’m like “god I hope this girl is a size queen cause every other women he’s fucked gotta be Jesus”

RYO? LOL. He actually doesn't have sex a lot. so he's sparing them all

[mrbexwrites]

9 Lines

Tagged here by @at-thezenith- thank you <3 and sorry for being late in responding!

Passing the tag onto @queen-tashie @deanwax @sam-glade @sarahlizziewrites @alnaperera @gummybugg @surroundedbypearls @scifimagpie and leaving an open tag for people who like to join in :)

Back to editing/re-writes of Memento Mori to try to get back into writing. Still not happy with this scene, so it'll probably end up on the cutting room floor!

“Violence is the only thing he understands,” tears welled in my eyes. “I’d do anything to get Kyrie back. Pay any price!” “Not this,” she gently pulled me away from his body, the heart monitor screaming as Victor flatlined. His outline was blurry, his spirit almost within my grasp. “We’ll get her back.” Reluctantly, I released the sliver of life, and the monitor stopped its alarm, the white line returning to its peaks and troughs.  “You’ve betrayed your masters,” I let out a trembling breath, and Zariah squeezed my shoulder. “They’ll know what you’ve done. I thought you were no longer a threat because you were in a hospital bed, but you’re just as dangerous as ever.” He attempted to smile again, but he was too weak.   “I’ll report back to Eagle Command about his involvement in all of this,” Zariah dropped her hand off me, and I noticed that she slipped the knife back into her sleeve. She was also willing to go what was needed, and would have cut my throat if I’d not backed down. Some things never change.  “I will always be a threat to you,” the machine spoke his words without inflection. That made what he said next even more terrifying. “Remember that, when the Gates open and I take my rightful place, holding your leash.” “Threats from the man who’s chained to his bed by a catheter and a life support system,” Zariah pulled a face in disgust. “You’re all farts, and no shit, Victor.”

[nannychloecatalog]

The Incontinence Procedure: Ginny’s Medical Diaper Domination (Full-Length ABDL Novel!)

(The following was first published on: July 3, 2024)

Excerpt:

(Notice: The following story features mature content in an ABDL setting. All characters are over the age of 18+.)

Ginny remained laying back on the padded medical exam table, her legs and feet propped up and secured with straps in their stirrups, her naked groin and buttocks fully exposed.

She felt a chill go down her spine as she watched Nurse Sunshine roll a cart over stocked to the brim with all manner of invasive looking medical supplies—from lubes, gels, ointments, and suppositories, to shiny metal speculums, catheters rubber and plastic, long and short, to clamps in every size, large enema bulbs and even larger enema bags, incontinence pads, baby wipes, endless medical straps, tubing, probes, and seemingly so much more.

Nurse Sunshine then wrapped a heavy, pastel-colored, rubber apron around herself. Then uncapped a large vat of medical-grade lubricant and scooped up a generous amount with her latex glove covered hand.

“Umm, excuse me, Nurse Sunshine?” Ginny squeaked in terror. “Can you maybe remind me what exactly you’ll be doing again?”

“Oh, nothing you need to be nervous about, dear,” Nurse Sunshine explained. “I’ll just be spending some time taking a closer look at your post-incontinence-procedure surgical area in order to check for proper healing, sensation and functionality. You can expect some gentle probing and stimulation in certain spots, but nothing uncomfortable. Or at least, nothing too uncomfortable. As long as you stay relaxed. That’s very important, that you stay relaxed,” Nurse Sunshine answered.

Ginny couldn’t help but immediately tense up at the nurse’s description. Then, as she watched Nurse Sunshine approach her naked crotch between her restrained and splayed out legs, Ginny felt a sudden sense of panic. She suddenly realized that she couldn’t even see what was happening! Her stupid bear-printed hospital gown had been strapped up with her elevated knees, resulting in an inadvertent curtain, preventing Ginny from even seeing her own exposed groin!

“Ummm, excuse me, but before you start, would you mind actually undoing the straps on my knees so I can at least pull my gown down, so I can see what’s happening?” Ginny nervously asked.

“Sorry hon,” Nurse Sunshine answered. “But it’s office policy that no restraint straps come undone mid-exam for patient safety. Not to mention that we’re already running short on time, because of how long you spent in the bathroom earlier. But don’t worry, it’s actually probably for the best that you’re not concerned with trying to see what I’m up to. All you need to do is lay back and relax, until I tell you otherwise, okay?”

Ginny audibly grumbled and whimpered in disbelief as she dropped her head back in defeat. She felt like she was starting to lose her mind with just how little control she had over anything.

“Oh, calm down, Miss Drama Queen, I’ll try to give you fair warning about what I’m doing down here, when I can,” Nurse Sunshine said. “But really, you have nothing to worry about. All you have to do is focus on staying relaxed and loose, okay? Can you be a big girl for me and start to relax?”

Ginny frowned, feeling insulted. But then, adding injury to insult, Nurse Sunshine gave Ginny’s naked bottom a light, playful slap to drive the point home, leaving Ginny stunned and mortified beyond words.

“Come on, darling, lighten up, I promise I’ll be gentle,” Nurse Sunshine said with a laugh.

Ginny was feeling downright furious, now. And her sense of anger and violation, combined with her mostly nude body being exposed to the exam room’s frigid AC, left her feeling pretty far from ‘relaxed and loosened up’ in her most sensitive orifices, to put it mildly.

Then, adding to her mounting discomfort, as her body shivered from the cold air, her worsening nerves, and her ever-increasing anxiety, her bladder began to really start aching for release again. Not only that, but the cramps in her bowels also began to return, resulting in painful urges of both kinds of potty-desperation that now took all her effort to hold back.

But as angry and tense as Ginny was at Nurse Sunshine and the situation as a whole, she was hardly allowed to retreat into herself for very long. Suddenly…

“Ooh!!” Ginny shrieked as she felt something ice cold abruptly press between her butt cheeks.

“Relax, little lady, that’s just my finger,” Nurse Sunshine laughed. “I haven’t even inserted anything anywhere, yet. I’m just warming you up a little.”

Ginny’s whole face burned red with anger and humiliation. She couldn’t believe this was happening.

And yet, at the same time, on some level, Ginny realized Nurse Sunshine was right. Ginny did need to relax for her own good. Because the examination was going to proceed whether she wanted it to or not. Even though she was furious with this woman, Ginny knew she had to try to drop it for now and cooperate to the best of her ability, anyway, for her own sake. She had to let go…

Well, ‘let go’ of her defiance, anyway. But not ‘let go’ of her mounting potty-pressures, of course, which she was more keenly focused on keeping hold of than ever, given the impending physical examination apparently in that exact area…

“Here, this might help,” Nurse Sunshine said as she reached behind her. The lights in the room suddenly dimmed.

Ginny looked around to see that the exam room was mostly dark, now, with just a couple of small fixtures practically providing mood lighting. She had to admit, it did actually help a lot to no longer have a blinding fluorescent ceiling light shining directly into her face.

Ginny put her head back, closed her eyes, and tried to take deep breaths and relax best she could, despite not being able to even see what exactly the nurse was doing to her down there.

She then felt Nurse Sunshine getting back to work between her legs. 

Ginny felt the nurse rubbing her lubricated digits up and down Ginny’s butt crack and around her rosebud. And as on edge as Ginny was, she had to admit… she was glad she could feel those fingers at least start to warm up that area, compared to the ice-cold sensation she felt before.

“There we go, that’s better, nice and relaxed. See? Nursie Sunshine’s just trying to help, I promise…” Nurse Sunshine cooed.

Then, without any warning—“Oooooohhh!”

Ginny squealed in shock as she felt the nurse plunge her digit directly into her bottom hole. As Ginny gasped for oxygen, she felt the nurse slowly begin to move her finger around, wiggling it back and forth inside her, before sliding her finger half-way out… and plunging it right back in.

“Oooh! Oooooh! Ooooooh!” Ginny squealed even louder as the finger plunged even deeper. But like some sort of dark alchemy, Ginny’s squeals of discomfort and shock began to quickly transform into low, breathy, bellowing moans.

“Oooooohhhhaaaahhhh…” Ginny groaned as Nurse Sunshine continued plunging her long finger in and out of Ginny’s ass, rhythmically moving it deeper in and out.

Ginny had never felt anything like it before. The words good or bad didn’t even register as possible descriptors. It was just simply… all-consuming. Like her whole being was suddenly concentrated on the rhythmic, ongoing overload of stimulation around her anus.

Then, Nurse Sunshine yanked her finger all the way back out, causing Ginny to collapse backward onto the exam table and heave for air. As if she’d just surfaced from an underwater swim. But before she even had a chance to catch her breath…

“Oooooohhhh… oooohhhhhh… OOOOHHH!” Ginny bellowed even louder, as Nurse Sunshine abruptly dove right back into Ginny’s anus, this time working in a second finger.

Part of Ginny felt a flash of humiliation as she realized what she must sound like right now. She was practically moaning like a pig right in the middle of the doctor’s office! She blushed bright red, mortified that the whole waiting room could probably hear her primal bellows through the clinic’s thin walls.

And yet, she couldn’t help but erupt with moaning gasps and writhe on the exam table, as she felt her ass getting expertly plunged and spread and plunged and spread again and again and again by the nurse’s powerful, unrelenting fingers.

As much as she hated to admit it, the restraints holding her legs in the stirrups and her butt on the table actually did make some sense, now, as without them, she probably would have rolled right off the table.

In addition, the concerning mounting sensations regarding her bowels before were kicked into overdrive, as her colon was put under the intense physical pressure of a gloved, digital invader forcing its way further and further up her poop chute.

But in the most perverse way, the unwanted BM stimulation seemed to only make her moan louder. Her brain was in a state of erogenous-stimulation overload! She couldn’t stop her noise, no matter how hard she tried! She wished she had a pillow to squeal into for christ’s sake!

Finally—shlorp—Nurse Sunshine once again yanked her fingers out without warning.

Ginny gasped and collapsed back in a red-faced heap, once again struggling to catch her breath.

“Well then, it sounds like it was a good idea for me to take some time to warm you up,” Nurse Sunshine said, walking back over to the cart and changing her latex gloves. “Now that you finally seem a lot more relaxed, we can actually get started.”

Ginny lifted her head in disbelief. That was all still just… the warm-up? She still hadn’t even started? she thought in horror. 

“But let’s get this out of the way before we go any further,” Nurse Sunshine said, grabbing what looked like a very large, thick, metal thermometer off of the cart.

Ginny noticed the thermometer, but was immediately confused why Nurse Sunshine started walking back between Ginny’s legs with it. Surely the thermometer belonged in her mouth or on her forehead…

“Is that a thermom—aaaahhh!”

Ginny’s question was interrupted as she felt her backdoor suddenly harshly intruded yet again! Like a cold metal rod was being pushed up her bottom!

“Oooh! Oooh! Oooooh!” Ginny squirmed and squealed as she felt the cold object go deeper and deeper into her.

“Why yes, hon, it is a thermometer!” Nurse Sunshine laughed.

“But… but… why…” Ginny gasped as the thermometer finally settled in place deep in her rectum. “Why are you putting it up my butt?”

“Simple, it’s more accurate. And when we’re doing a comprehensive post-surgical uncovered groin exam, like we are today, it’s important we get the most accurate reading. Especially while you’re already in the position for it, anyway,” Nurse Sunshine said.

“But what about the fact that it’s uncomforta—ahhhhhh,” Ginny moaned as she felt the ice cold thermometer roughly readjusted in the depths of her rectum.

“Shhhh, quiet. You’re interfering with the reading when you move or talk. Now, I have to start over,” Nurse Sunshine said, holding the thermometer still with her palm pressed against Ginny’s butt, a ticking pocket watch in her other hand.

Ginny pouted in frustration, but went quiet and laid back. She tried to take deep breaths and ignore the massive, humiliating, metal intruder in her bottom. Never mind the infantilizing sensation of knowing she was literally getting her temperature taken the way a baby did.

Finally, after what felt like several minutes, Nurse Sunshine abruptly pulled the invader out, causing Ginny to moan from the sensation of it sliding out of her.

Ginny watched Nurse Sunshine wipe the thermometer off with a baby wipe just out of her view, a fleeting expression of disgust crossing the nurse’s face, causing Ginny to blush as she imagined exactly what had to be wiped away. Nurse Sunshine then scribbled down the result on her clipboard. 

“Well?” Ginny asked, still slightly out of breath.

“Huh?” Nurse Sunshine replied.

“Did I have a temperature, like you suspected?” Ginny asked.

Nurse Sunshine laughed. “Oh, no, dear, I didn’t suspect you had a temperature, and your reading was indeed perfectly normal. But it’s all just part of the exam that we be as thorough as possible, just in case.”

Ginny frowned and laid back down. “Got it…” she grumbled, folding her arms in thinly veiled frustration. It seemed to her like she just got her ass penetrated by a metal rod for very little reason, adding insult to her latest anal-probe-humiliation injury…

“Alright, hon, now that we got the back door nice and wide open, time to spend some time with the front,” Nurse Sunshine said, changing her latex gloves again.

“Huh?” Ginny asked, the now familiar snap of Nurse Sunshine donning new gloves sending a fresh chill down her spine.

“Never mind, dear. Just focus on relaxing, just like you were doing before. It’s more important than ever you focus on staying very, very relaxed while I continue your exam,” Nurse Sunshine said, pouring lube into her hand.

Ginny gulped, the ominous warning once again having the predictably opposite effect of its supposed intent.

“Actually, you know what,” Nurse Sunshine paused. “If I remember your intake assessment, you mentioned that you weren’t sexually active. Is that still the case?”

“Ummm… that’s right,” Ginny answered.

“So you’re still a virgin?” the nurse asked.

Ginny blushed. Her virginity was something Ginny was pretty embarrassed about, given her age. She felt like she just never got the romantic attention her friends seemed to get while in school, which meant she just never got the chance. And now, out of school, it felt like her chances of losing her virginity were only rapidly diminishing every year.

Add to that, her recently developed severe incontinence, which seemed to be the death knell for the possibility of her ever getting laid again. After all, who would want to sleep with a girl who still wore stinky diapers and peed their pants like a baby?

“That’s right, still a virgin,” Ginny meekly answered.

“Good to know,” Nurse Sunshine said, going back to her cart.

“Why?” Ginny asked.

“Trust me, you’ll thank me for this in a minute,” Nurse Sunshine said, suddenly squirting a much bigger helping of lube into her hands. “Now just go back to relaxing, okay, hon? Close your eyes and take deep breaths. This part is going to take a little bit longer.”

Ginny watched with apprehension as Nurse Sunshine disappeared between her legs again. But then she put her head back and took deep breaths, trying to forget where she was—strapped down to an exam table with her ass and pussy vulnerable, exposed, and very likely about to experience something less than pleasant.

She waited… and waited… and waited… and…

Ginny gasped as she finally felt the nurse’s warm hand land atop her pussy. She felt Nurse Sunshine’s fingers begin slowly but firmly massaging her vulva, her whole groin suddenly soaking wet with lube… and perhaps fluids of her own. Then, suddenly…

“Oooooooooooooooh,” Ginny erupted with a long, soft, involuntary moan as the nurse’s fingers effortlessly slipped deep into her pussy.

Ginny’s face flushed as she gasped, her fingers gripping the padding of the exam table beneath her for dear life, as she desperately tried to remain calm in the face of a cascade of breathtaking emotions.

She was a virgin. And even though she masturbated, she’d hardly ever been adventurous enough to penetrate into her pussy, instead preferring the simplicity of toying with her clit until she accomplished a quick and dirty climax.

But now, she realized she was being penetrated for the first time. Tenderly, yet firmly, penetrated by the warmth and depth of Nurse Sunshine’s rhythmic, powerful, sensual digits.

Ginny gasped and flushed and squeezed the table as she realized she was being fucked. She was being taken. She was losing her virginity, right now…

And it felt indescribable. Not forceful. Not aggressive. Just gentle, assertive, highly-skilled penetration of her most delicate orifice. 

Images began to swirl in Ginny’s mind as she closed her eyes and focused in on the overpowering sexual vibrations. Thoughts, memories and powerful figments of imagination sent jolts of tingling, erotic pleasure up and down her trembling body. The swirl of erotic sensation began getting stronger… and stronger… and…

Suddenly, the rhythmic digital massage stopped.

Ginny opened her eyes, waiting for some sign from down below as to what was happening.

Then, to her surprise… she felt Nurse Sunshine’s other hand land gently on her abdomen. Below her belly button.

On her bladder.

Ginny felt a flash of anxiety. The reality of her situation, of her incontinence, and her worsening need to pee, came flooding back to her. She felt Nurse Sunshine start to rub atop her bladder. Poke and prod and feel. And the feeling like her bladder was about to burst came roaring back to the front of her mind.

“Wait, wait, waiahhhh…”

Ginny’s pleas were suddenly drowned out by the flood of pleasure returning to the place where Nurse Sunshine had her other hand…

On Ginny’s pussy. Inside Ginny’s pussy. Wet, warm fingers once again sliding in and out, in and out. Rubbing and pressing and squeezing her clit. Stretching and stimulating and screwing her hard with her digits.

Ginny began to moan and writhe, getting louder, trembling and squealing.

Her need to pee was becoming painful. Excruciating.

And while the pressure in her bladder reached new heights, the pressure in her clit and pussy did the same, building, building, building…

The hidden nurse’s fingers rubbed harder and faster. Deeper. Wetter. Inside her pussy. Outside atop her bladder.

Ginny was being pressed and squeezed in both directions. The pain and pleasure was excruciating and exquisite. The intensity made her want to scream but she could hardly breathe! It was all so unbearably intense! It was all happening! She knew it was coming! She couldn’t help it!

She finally brought her hands up to her mouth and attempted to stifle the noise as she threw her head back and shrieked at the top of her lungs—

“AaaaaahhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeOOOOOhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!”

And while she climaxed…

Her bladder erupted with the most intense piss of her life, spraying like a firehose, drenching everything between her legs with a mighty shower of peepee.

Suddenly, the room’s blinding overhead fluorescent lights flicked back on.

Ginny squinted and covered her eyes in a dreary daze… then she bolted upright in horror.

She lurched against her waist and leg restraints, forgetting about them at first as she reflexively tried to jump to her feet. Then, she frantically lurched left and right, desperately trying to see around her raised knees and hospital gown to the area between her legs.

Her head spun. She felt as if she had just been abruptly yanked from a bewildering dream. But amidst the haze, one vivid sensation persisted. The overwhelming fear that she had just done the unthinkable. That she really might have just…

"Young lady," Nurse Sunshine's stern voice cut through the air from behind her.

Ginny turned. And to her horror, what she saw seemed to confirm her worst nightmare…

Nurse Sunshine was standing beside the exam table, her arms folded, her expression furious, and her rubber apron… dripping with piss. Ginny’s piss.

___________

Buy now to read the rest of this full-length (270+ pages) Novel!

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[astridblogs]

Continuity and Change in Plastic Surgery

Plastic surgery has had many different connotations throughout the years. In its early stages it was seen more as to fix defects and amputations. In today's times, it is seen as a luxury. The changes plastic surgery has endured have been many and now serves multiple purposes.

Ancient Rome

The very beginning of plastic surgery began in ancient Rome in 1 BC. Since Romans would constantly be at war, they needed surgeries for amputations and wounds that cannot be self-healed. They would normally conduct surgical procedures on gladiators who had their noses and ears amputated. During this time, ancient Romans had different views and beliefs and would therefore conduct surgeries to supposedly correct them. In this time they mainly focused on circumcision removals. An encyclopedist named Aulus Conrelius Celsus would further explain this surgery and others such as breast reductions and a blepharoplasty (excess skin removed from the eyes) in a text named 'De re medicina'.[1].

Fathers of Plastic Surgery

The advancements in plastic surgery developed in India around 800 BC. A physician named Sushruta had explored the causes of more than 1,100 diseases, used plants for medicine, and conducted plenty of surgical procedures such as the "Indian Method"[2], also known as the forehead flap rhinoplasty. In this surgery, Sushruta would use the tissues from the forehead and used them for nose reconstruction. He used more than 125 surgical tools to conduct the forehead flap rhinoplasty which included "dilators, catheters, and syringes"[3]. The forehead flap rhinoplasties were common because many would lose their nose due to penalization of crimes such as theft from India. Sushruta helped fix the nasal problems people had and carried on to do other procedures such as lobuloplasties and otoplasties.

Here is Sushruta conducting a surgery on one of his patients

Fast foward to the 1500s, another "father of plastic surgery" arose [4]. He was an Italian man named Gaspare Tagliacozzi. He established the "Italian Method" in rhinoplasties which was him cutting a flap of skin from the bicep and fully removing it and adding it onto the nose.

In this photo it shows Gaspare Tagliacozzi's method of rhinoplasties.

These two plastic surgery pioneers had similar methods of removal and used it to develop a practice that would change the field of surgery.

Plastic Surgery's Impact on War

During times of war, many soldiers lose fingers, noses, ears, lips, and so many more features due to artillery. Fortunately, plastic surgery helps those soldiers better or even fully heal the wounds they have. The reconstruction of body parts has helped veterans be themselves again and do tasks they were not able to preform before.

World War I

Around the early 19th century, World War I broke out. Over 21 million soldiers were wounded by things such as machine guns and trench warfare and most needed surgery in order to live. The sudden emergence of plastic surgery arose when veterans were needing facial reconstruction such as for their jaw injuries that would not let them eat or drink. A doctor named Harold Gillies was the first to experiment with plastic surgery during the war on his patients in his hospital, The Queen's Hospital. Dr. Gillies began to test out "...basic skin and bone grafts in his attempts to repair the shattered jaws of soldiers who had taken bullets or shrapnel to their faces"[5]. Gillies curiosity of plastic surgery further progressed when he observed Hippolyte Morestin, a maxillofacial surgeon, and began to focus on the entire face rather than the jaw. His first major surgery was on a man named Walter Yeo, a sailor that was wounded while fighting Battle of Jutland. Gillies normalized facial surgeries among the medical world because of this war and because of him plastic surgery became a frequent practice for veterans in need.

Here in these pictures Yeo had gotten a flap surgery and a skin transplant.

World War II

Because of the positive impact plastic surgery had on veterans in WWI, it was used and developed more in World War II (WWII). Doctors had to quickly adjust to new surgeries that help correct disfigured burns. One doctor in particular named Dr. Archibald McIndoe was the Harold Gillies of this war who helped many of his patients, also known as the "Guinea Pig Club" [6],repair the severe injuries. However, it wasn't the technique of his surgery that made him a remarkable doctor, it was his form of talking to his patients. Dr. Mclndoe would try to uplift his patient's self esteem by telling them their alterations do not make them any less of a person and would bring 'showgirls' [7] to have conversations with them to make them feel confident. Not only were faces repaired, but so were eyes. At Valley Forge Hospital, they started to develop artificial eyes. These eyes were made up of acrylic which look highly realistic. This helped veterans have their old face and confidence back.

After using plastic surgery for necessary and urgent injuries, the practice began to expand into unnecessary uses. After WWII, Japan escorts began to inject silicone straight into their breasts. After this event, many others began to use plastic surgery for luxury reasons and needless body modifications.

The Era of Real Plastic

After using plastic surgery for defects and injuries, it began to expand into further developments. With the help of silicone, people began to use them for selfish needs. The first silicone implant was invented by Thomas Cronin in 1962 and was used for a breast augmentation on Timmie Jean Lindsey in 1964. This surgery added a whole new meaning towards the words "plastic surgery" and began to spread like wildfire. Celebrities and the rich began to use these surgeries to better their appearance in order to stay famous or to just have more confidence. The new connotation of plastic surgery made lavishness resonate with the medical world and established a very successful industry.

Throughout the late 20th and early 21st century, Micheal Jackson has been getting aesthetic surgical procedures to his nose. He has denied most allegations about facial surgeries, but has admitted to 2 rhinoplasties [10]

Present Day Surgeries

Today, the image people think of when plastic surgery is mentioned are mostly vain procedures such as Brazilian Butt Lifts, rhinoplasties, breast implants, lip fillers, etc. Plastic surgery began to be normalized for body or alterations so much that now "...around 1.6 million [plastic surgery] procedures in 1997 to over 5.5 million in 2020 [in the past decade]"[8]. Most singers, actors, and even models have been under the knife to keep their appearance or to appear more exotic. To go more into depth, Bella Hadid has had surgical procedures such as a rhinoplasty at 14 [9]. The common appearance of celebrities with plastic surgery influenced more classes to get into it. For example, the middle class became involved in small operations and are now common to be seen doing non-surgical procedures such as botox. Although plastic surgery is still meant to help correct defects and injuries, the connotation and flashes people get when plastic surgery is mentioned has changed and is now seen as something lush most get.

In this before and after picture of Bella Hadid, you could notice the change of her nose due to a rounder tip, a smoother nose bridge, and an overall thinner nose.

The Influence of Plastic Surgery

As more and more surgical procedures were used and documented by ancient Egyptians, 16th century Italians, and wars, the procedures began to be used globally. Many countries began to use the surgical knowledge and further develop it to treat other injuries and needs. This industry has positively helped alter the lives of many and has made a forever impact one's confidence. Today, there are more than 15 million plastic surgeries which are now fully sanitary, handled by professionals, and most importantly, a safe procedure.

[1]: https://www.capegazette.com/node/69868

[2]https://journals.lww.com/annalsplasticsurgery/Abstract/2014/07000/Sushruta__Father_of_Plastic_Surgery.2.aspx#:~:text=Because%20of%20his%20seminal%20contributions,method.%E2%80%9D%20He%20was%20born%20sometime

[3]: (https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23133066/)

[4]: https://www.kirbyplasticsurgery.com/blog/plastic-surgery-history-wartime/

[5]: https://www.warhistoryonline.com/history/the-origin-of-plastic-surgery.html?safari=1

[6]: https://www.kirbyplasticsurgery.com/blog/plastic-surgery-history-wartime/

[7]: https://www.kirbyplasticsurgery.com/blog/plastic-surgery-history-wartime/

[8]: https://www.statista.com/topics/3734/cosmetic-surgery/

[9]: https://www.elle.com/uk/life-and-culture/culture/a39438874/bella-hadid-admits-to-the-surgery-she-had-at-14-including-a-nose-job/

[10]: https://abcnews.go.com/2020/MichaelJackson/story?id=7982236&page=1

[feytouched]

update. i spent the night there (slept like 3h on a recliner with a blankie they gave me, under fluorescent lights, catheter in my arm and with a mask on. 2/10 experience) and at 8 the new shift doctor told me i will be seen by a vascular surgeon early this afternoon when he's done operating. i've technically not been released but i was told to go wait at home so here i am, having breakfast, showering and maybe sleeping some more.

also, almost done with the queen of nothing. i did the plot twist at the end wayyy ahead of them in my self published fairytale when i was nine, only with a golden horse rather than a giant snake. also also, i just tried the pumpkin pound cake and it turned out too eggy so the texture is off but the flavour is wonderful.

[remembertheplunge]

Homeless and outside of society

Sunday June 9 2019. 10:49pm

Notes:  My friend MAC had been drugged, dumped in a dumpster. His car was stolen. His phone was in his car. This was on 9th street near the highway 99 over crossing. Poor side of Modesto .Somehow, MAC made it the 5 miles to my house. A neighbor saw MAC acting oddly in my front yard and called the police. I wasn’t home. The police left me a voice mail that MAC was at Queen Bean Coffee house. I drove there. He was near incoherent. I had bought the car that was stolen from him. A  black 2000 Ford Focus. I helped him to get a driver’s license. He was homeless. He lived in that car I think at times. He used it to help out other homeless with rides. That’s why I called it the Ark. The car had a lot of mechanical problems. In the end, it was left in front of my house for months and finally towed. MAC and I met in 2010. He lived with me in my house off and on from then until December 2014. We remain friends. He is still homeless.

So, here is part of the 6/9/2019 entry:

So, MAC was lost and wondering around until 3:30 or 4pm.

Doctor’s hospital—police in front of my house—the neighbor who called them Queen Bean Coffee House staff—all, just let MAC swing in the wind—until I showed up. My neighbor who is a nurse said “ER”., So, I drove MAC to Kaiser ER. Sheriff’s Officer, appeared. Kaiser staff treated and kept MAC. The Doctor thought  he was tweaking. MAC's symptoms were severe and extreme. Jolting of the torso. Loss of motor control. Hand control. Incoherence and confusion.

So, back to the beginning: 

6/9/2019. Sunday. 8:51pm.   

Kaiser Hospital. Here with MAC who sleeps. He may have been drugged and rolled. He had been dumped in a dumpster. His car was stolen, and his phone. Really fucked up disaster. Really, really a tragic mess. Very sad.

He was helping people. Billy and another person, slept all night in the car with MAC at the California Motel on 9th street.

June 11, 2019. Tuesday 11:29pm

Aaron’s the hero. Thought he saw MAC’s car across from the El Capitan Motel. Told us as we were headed to the California Inn looking for the car. As we waited for the police, Billy showed up . Gave MAC the car key. Billy talked about giving MAC Narco, laying MAC out on the ground, and stealing MAC’s car. When MAC told Billy the police were on the way, Billy ran. Police showed and  found Billie’s mail in MAC’s car. AMAZING.  Car was fine!  Thank God.

MAC and I talked about how Kaiser Hospital forced MAC out. He didn’t know what say to stay in the hospital. Doctors kicked him out in 2 hours saying he could care for himself. Even the Sheriff’s officer stopped returning my calls. Last night, I told him that  the car was returned. Billy was never arrested or prosecuted. The State tends not to investigate nor prosecute crimes involving only the homeless.

But, MAC and I moved through it. We did what we had to do.

End of entries

Note:  By June of 2019 I had been working with the homeless for over 3 years. In the many encounters I had with the homeless during that time, some encounters also involved interactions with the police. And with medical care , including drug rehabilitation and hospital visits with the homeless. I found that when I aligned myself with the homeless, I tended to be treated like the homeless were treated. In the case of MAC getting drugged, getting his car stolen and ending up in Kaiser hospital, the sheriff officer who arrived at the hospital regarding the car theft incident, focused his investigation on me, as if I was the perpetrator. This took place as we were standing feet away where MAC was lying incoherent on a bed behind a curtain. While the officer interrogated me, the hospital staff shoved a catheter up MAC’s penus to get a sample. MAC began screaming in agony. The staff did this to see if MAC was under the influence of heoin.  I was a Kaiser member at the time, but left Kaiser as a result of that act.

[dykehaus]

willa catheter would be a great drag queen name

[alyosiuscreightonward]

DearDiary. I recently saw a post, “please brag to me about a thing you did in 2023 that you’re proud of…”

I had to go to the emergency room in October due to passing a kidney stone. That resulted in something called “gross Hematuria,” meaning there’s blood in my urine. That sucks. It continues, but not as bad as I thought it would be. I can see the different colors in my urine. Yeah. I fucking look. Then I had noticed blood in my stool. UGH!! Then I went and had a colonoscopy. The doctor said that there was one polyp and it was benign. Which made me think of a guy I used to know who was referred to as “The Benign Polyp” due to him him being morbidly obese and the fact that he was very much like milk toast. He’s another story. I digress. So I think that’s a good thing. Then there’s upcoming visit to the urologist. UGH!!! First is the CT Scan to make sure that the kidney stones are still there. Dude, they’re still there. Trust. Then comes the procedure. That motherfucker is going to stick a catheter, as thin as a piece of dried any gel hair pasta or even thinner possibly, into my urethra. Excuse me?!?! WTAF?!?! When I was told this, all I could think of was Robert Mapplethorpe. At an exhibition of his art, there’s a picture of man’s finger shoved into another man’s urethra. Fucking scary shit. Look here, I grew up in house with three women and I was told shit I did not want to know. Then there are the innumerable women I’ve known over the years and trust and believe, I learned more than I wanted to know. Now, as a guy, I really don’t want to tell you about some shit and most men will never tell you anything because they’re men. I know some men are big babyies when they get sick or injured. I have found that they want all kinds of attention. Me, I’m like if I’m going to suffer through this, please leave me the fuck alone. Don’t fawn over me.

When I broke my finger and was released from the hospital, I went to work. After I had surgery on my finger and had to wear the a cast, I went to work, but I had someone drive my car because I wouldn’t drive with a cast on. I’ve seen folks do it and it ain’t me.

Then after my brain surgery, I went to work.

I had double hernia surgery, I went to work.

Even after cataract surgery, I still went to work and I drove.

I’ve always listened to my doctors and stayed home, but just not the more than the ten days they had mandated.

I’m tough old buzzard and I don’t know what will keep me down. Maybe when I learn that I’ve got cancer, that still don’t keep me down.

I know I am a fucking drama queen but god damn I’m still gonna keep on trucking regardless. There’s shit I know that I know I shouldn’t do, but if I don’t do it then it will not get done.

That’s all for now.

[crossdressme2]

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[allofmyfriendsaredead27]

I’ve been reading a lot about personality traits and take whatever I can just to understand myself better and why I feel the way I feel and the relationships or lack thereof that I form.

Add insult to injury and have some random douche attack you on social media out of nowhere.

How I react, holds true to things that are important to me and likely related to my personality traits. Best fit is sigma. I don’t like it because they make sigmas sound so wonderful, who wouldn’t want to identify with it. One thing, though, that stands out belief in core values without validation, with integrity being something important to me. That is why I do take it well when I lies are said about me. I can’t escape it though; it has happened throughout my entire life.

I will tell you a story of how important integrity is to me, and what moment I always think of when someone or myself refers to integrity. This is when I really understood what it meant to have integrity and why it is an important characteristic to have.

Let me start out to tell you that I hate the urinary tract. It is too sensitive especially when it is diseased. You look at it the wrong way the urethra ruptures. There was an addon case for the day. I was in my first year of faculty, and I was suffering from imposter syndrome hard and I was working on the floor with one of the best mentors I’ve ever had on the other team. You feel my pressure. He tells me he added on a sheltie (his favorite breed and owns one himself) that likely has TCC, transitional cell carcinoma, bladder tumor that shelties are predisposed to. Ugh, you feel it. Anyways, it’s a really cute sheltie, the queen she is, named Coco Chanel. They didn’t even have to tell me, but they did, she was their baby. She was real sweet and soft and smelled like perfume believe it or not. Likely form being hugged by her mom and obtaining the scent. I couldn’t tell you if it was Coco Chanel because I have no clue about that shit, but I pretended it was. Anyways, she in fact had a bladder tumor and the urine collected didn’t tell us if it was inflammation or cancer. It was cancer because she’s a sheltie with a bladder mass, but you kind of have to prove it. Especially if they want to treat it. We perform a traumatic catheterization, in which you insert a catheter into the urethra into the bladder, poke the mass hopefully to dislodge cells, and even better tissue, to collect and analyze to see if it has the characteristics of cancer. I left the resident try in hopes she gets it because I hate the urinary tract, the dog’s too small and the normal soft catheter is too flimsy to transverse the urethral papilla, so she tried a more stiff catheter, unfortunately, those tend to cause more issues, like tear of the urinary tract. She has some problems so I try and only a little urine comes back so okay maybe it was in the right place, I take a look using an ultrasound and ask the student to flush some saline into the catheter in hopes I see bubbles in the bladder, I gently move the catheter to see if I can see it move, and I do. Unfortunately, below the bladder, meaning it is in the abdomen. I remove the catheter and run into the student hall way and tell my old mentor what happened. He goes really? Did you leave the catheter in? Fuck, no. I panicked and wanted it out of there. But keeping it in would make the contrast procedure that we need to do to identify if there really was a tear, which I know there was, but again, have to prove it. We take the dog down to radiology to do contrast vaginourethrocystogram using fluoroscopy; fluoroscopy is really fun to watch, but it wasn’t fun this time. I wait for the results, nauseas hoping by some miracle I was wrong. My mentor entertains the students with stories when things have gone terrible for him in the clinic. He’s a really cool guy. The results indicate a rupture, but a small one and initially wasn’t there so maybe the procedure they did caused a rupture. The person performing this procedure was my resident mate, a radiologist, and humble as fuck. It was me not her, it doesn’t make sense otherwise. I call the owner from the radiology unit, the phone on the wall, me kneeling with my head own on the counter, telling the owner that there was a tear and worst-case scenario she might need surgery. We were going ot monitor her overnight with antibiotics and see how she does. It is probable she will be ok, this is from the surgeon, who seems very less freaked out by the situation, saying it will likely be fine. He was right but it was a long 24 hrs. It was a Saturday morning, and I was discharging the dog who really did not seem to care and the male owner came to pick her up. I walk him out to his car and we chat for a bit and I am feeling so appreciative of how nice he is being, and he told me that he really admired my integrity and how I handled the situation. Again, this was probably more of a scare for me than anyone else (besides her owners), but I felt so terrible, and those words of kindness meant a lot.

I now tell residents about the time a tore the through the vaginal canal trying to catheterize the urinary tract of a female dog when they start to catheterize the urinary tract. I hope they appreciate it haha.

[tyneoconnell]

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THE BEAUTIFUL LIE - Brain Tumour In Mayfair https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZII7NoIApc I miss the fearlessness vitality & bravery that once defined me... my #Antique #Tiaras @velveteccentric collars ballgowns & #redlipstick have now failed me & the exquisite fragility of the elaborate lie that links me to who I was via a #catheter of artifice nourishing me with dreams & #diamonds... Has evaporated A myriad of majestic moments tug at my heart & suddenly the carefully constructed mask of coping slips! My ability to suspend the truth fails me & the awful reality of my #braintumour engulfs me in the pain & lonely darkness of terror I miss me....I miss all I once was...& the endless possibility That stretched before me like a Persian rug, An unopened book, A full pot of ink I miss that girl miss those endless #Mayfair nights On Park Lane & Berkeley Square & climbing the gates of #MountStreetGardens I miss walking along the mayfair rooftops in historic ballgowns Clinging to chimneypots - Searching for clues to other peoples past - Now I search the corridors of my memory for Tyne O’Connell The me I was... Undaunted unbowed Brave as a poet The girl who travelled the world alone #ParistoDakar Blazing across the deserts the #polofields & #croquetlawns of the world undaunted by minefields or borders or giving birth without pain relief in a Victorian bath tub without a doctor & only #Poetry to cling to My life flashes across my synapses & there I am! The girl Skipping through bluebell pathways The mother kidnapped by Kurds & Held hostage to a cause As old as History Ransomed for weapons ⚜️ The years living in #Egypt Sitting in the ancient coffee shops Where my father once sipped tea On his missions as a #secret agent for the British government I see me Holding the hand of a dying #queen Passing the chemmie slipper to Dukes & spies the Woman I was? undaunted unbowed shielded by the bravery of my Irish ancestors who fled genocides Fought for liberty heroines who defied conformity, misogyny, bigotry, boredom & borders Celebrated by Children Betrayed by men, Life is a ballroom Lit with with chandeliers Fragrant with the ebullience of hope (at London Fashion Week) https://www.instagram.com/p/B1ee2RYAcNh/?igshid=54b1pna4jn7e