#r want to work in food again. i sort of think everyone in the country should do a mandatory food service employment term like how

[steelycunt]

JUST FINISHED MY LAST SHIF T AT MY JOB EVERRRRR MOODBOARD!!!!!!!! LOVE AND LIGHT TO EVERYBODY!!!

[twstarchives]

Scary Dress・Voice Lines

● Event: Scary Monsters (October 14 - November 26, 2020) ● Exclusive Cards: Deuce, Kalim, Epel, Idia, Malleus, Lilia, Azul, Jack, Jade, Vil, Cater

Deuce Spade - R

Unlock Card “This school event is meant for everyone to have fun. I’m going to make sure this Halloween’s a success!”

Groovy “You’re not getting away from me... I’ll scare you till you're trembling to the bone!”

Home Setting “I’m a skeleton ghost that’s risen from the grave! BOO!”

Home Transitions “These are our special costumes, so make sure you’re careful with them. Grim, that means don’t claw on the lace.”

“When I was a kid, there were times when I used to start sobbing because I thought there was a monster outside. But it was actually just the laundry drying out there... Oi, stop laughing!”

“I got some treats from Epel. There’s a lot of them, so I thought I’d share with you. You know the secret code, right?”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Happy Halloween! You just can’t help but get excited around this time of year.”

Home Taps “I saw Draconia a while ago. Seeing him walk around in that serpentine dragon costume so valiantly made him look cooler than ever.”

“I got a text from my mom—she said she wants to see my costume. I don’t mind sending her one, but I don’t know how I feel about taking a selfie... Prefect, could you take one of me?”

“I’m used to seeing the ghosts on campus, so they’re not that scary. Our terrifying dorm leader Rosehearts, on the other hand...”

“Viper fixed the lace on my hat for me. I feel like the vice leaders in every dorm are really caring.”

“Hey, you! You want me to bury you!? S-Sorry. I was practicing my scares; I didn’t mean to say that to you, Prefect.”

Kalim Al-Asim - R

Unlock Card “Are you all ready to have some fun? Alright! Come on and follow my lead! One, two—Happy Halloween!”

Groovy “Grr... Pain shoots through my body whenever I look at the full moon. You better watch your back if you start to hear some howling.”

Home Setting “Growl! I’m a werewolf now.”

Home Transitions “Rook knows a lot about wildlife, and he told me all kinds of things about wolves. It was really useful.”

“I always carry around candies this time of year. This way anyone can tell me ‘Trick or treat’ anytime!”

“My magic carpet seems pretty excited for Halloween too. I’m competing with it to see who’s the scariest!”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “A party that everyone’s stoked about—that’s what Halloween is! Let’s have fun together! Growl! Growl!”

Home Taps Whine! Grrrrr! Bark! *cough!* “It’s hard trying to sound like a wolf...”

“I feel like it’d be so much more exciting if Cater, Lilia, and I dressed up for our band performances. Don’t you think so?”

“Jade said his costume is a mummy. If you wore clothes like that in the Scalding Sands, you’d get so hot that you might actually turn into one.”

“I like this costume; its design is really reminiscent of the Scalding Sands. Plus it’s easy to move in. It fits for dressing up as a werewolf.”

“Hm? You want to try scaring me? Spare me from any tricks, though. Ahaha!”

Epel Felmier - R

Unlock Card “Boo! Did I spook you? Hehe. I’ll come scare you again if you let down your guard.”

Groovy “Struggling against me is useless... I think. You won’t get away from me.”

Home Setting “Now, Halloween has begun!”

Home Transitions “Wah! Oh, crap!¹ I stepped all over my cloak. If Vil saw me, he’d get mad and say ‘It’s not proper to run around like that.’”

“I carved some of the pumpkins that are decorating the school. Mine have ghosts and our dorm’s emblem on them. Try to find them, okay?”

“Hey, have you seen the decorations on Main Street? They’re all so pretty, and really marvy².”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “I think this is the first time I’ve celebrated such a festive Halloween. In my town, the festivals feel a lot more scaled down.”

Home Taps “Halloween celebrations in my hometown are never this big, but I can promise you the food’s always delicious. I want you all to come see it someday.”

“Riddle got really passionate when we were talking about the treats for Halloween earlier. Sweets are just amazing, aren’t they?”

“I’m a first-year just like Deuce and Jack, but I wish I could scare as well as they do. But only practice makes perfect!”

“Tremble in fear! ...No. That’s not menacing enough... Ah! What if I put ketchup around my mouth?”

“Huh!? A treat? Sorry. I finished handing all mine out. But I’ll peel an apple for you later, so don’t give me a trick or anything... Okay?”

Idia Shroud - R

Unlock Card “E-E-Even I get excited for events sometimes... Is that bad!?”

Groovy “Anyone who sees what’s beneath my helmet won’t be leaving here unharmed... Hehehe!”

Home Setting “Wahaha! The Pumpkin Knight has arrived!”

Home Transitions “Every time Ortho tells me ‘Trick or treat,’ I give him some candy, but earlier he got mad and said ‘Let me have a trick too.’”

“You need to know your etiquette to have fun with events. That’s true no matter what world you’re in.”

“This time of year, they’re always having tons of huge events in gacha games. I’ve got an overwhelming lack of free time.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Weheehee~... Happy Halloween. Huh? Why are you making that face? Is it that weird to see me pumped up?”

Home Taps “Hiding my face under a helmet really lets me relax. The downside is it’s a little hard to breathe, though.”

“Wh-What are you dressing up as? Don’t tell me you’re just going to throw on something basic like a headband or a hat and call it a day?”

“They say lions are members of the cat family, but... Sir Leona is not soothing in the slightest. Hah~ I wanna nuzzle a cat...”

“You can say it. There’s no such thing as a nerd that hates Halloween!”

“Weheehee! I made this using a 3D printer, so it’s got really nice durability. ‘How much did it all cost’? Well, if you want to know, it was on sale.”

Malleus Draconia - SR

Unlock Card “Halloween is a festival observed by both the living and the dead, regardless of one’s race. You, too, should enjoy yourself as much as you can.”

Groovy “I’d make anyone tremble in fear with a single breath of fire. Watch me.”

Home Setting “I’m not dressed up as a dragon. It’s a serpentine dragon.”

Home Transitions “The students in our dorm seem very pleased with our costumes. They were all cheering with joy. This was well-worth the trouble.”

“Lilia knows a lot about many nations’ versions of Halloween. He told me stories about them instead of his usual lullabies. That was a long time ago, though.”

“I saw two pumpkin knights around campus. The smaller one was floating, so I’m assuming they were the Shroud brothers.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “I’ve experienced many Halloweens, but this year seems especially chaotic.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Trick or treat!... wasn’t it? If you don’t give me a treat, I’ll have to trick you. What will you do?”

Home Taps “The red serpentine dragons from the Far East, which our costumes were based on, could even play folk instruments. Hm... How very interesting.”

“I caught Asim practicing his wolf howls. He’s lacking on the impact, but it does have a charm to it. Heheh.”

“Halloween in the Valley of Thorns is especially grand. It’s a different take on it than other countries have, but you should come see it someday. It’s beautiful.”

“If you hear a strange noise, don’t automatically assume it’s the work of a ghost. Faeries love playing tricks all year round.”

“This tail? Mine is not an accessory; it’s real. As curious as you might be, don’t get too close. You’d be easily flicked aside if you got hit by it.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “I’ll set fire to anyone that harms your dorm, just like a serpentine dragon would. I’m fond of that place.”

Lilia Vanrouge - SR

Unlock Card “Halloween is my home ground ♪ I can’t wait to see the surprise on everyone’s faces.”

Groovy “Do not underestimate me. You might end up finding yourself trembling and unable to sleep all night long.”

Home Setting “Growl! How was that? Did I sound like a dragon?”

Home Transitions “On Halloween Night, the goblins who served the Fairy of Thorns would gather around a fire and dance all night long. You probably wouldn’t expect them to be party animals!”

“I remember the day I met a real-life serpentine dragon in the East like it was yesterday. Its crimson scales were truly a sight to behold.”

“I like eating most sweets, but marshmallows are the only ones I can’t do. It doesn’t feel like I’m eating anything; they aren’t satisfying.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Trick or treat... What? You’re already used to my tricks? Then I’ll have to bring out my trump card.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “If I were a real dragon, I could give you a ride on my back. But instead, why don’t I give you a piggy back ride?”

Home Taps “Hnn... The decorative horns on my cap are so heavy. Malleus really has these on his head at all times?”

“Aren’t my red nails cute? Vil painted them for me. He told me these were called gel nails—long-lasting nail polish.”

“Silver and Sebek used to be such crybabies. The mornings after Halloween, I’d have to spend the whole day doing laundry.”

“Have you seen Ace anywhere? He’s always eating Trey’s sweets like he really likes them, so I made some for him as well.”

“Oh, oh! It’s dangerous for someone of my stature to have a tail almost touching the ground. Try not to step on it either.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Achoo! Sorry, sorry. This peacock feather tickled my nose.”

Azul Ashengrotto - SR

Unlock Card “The Mostro Lounge is currently offering a special Halloween menu. You must come and see!”

Groovy “Let’s have all the fun we want tonight. Now, let me hear you scream all the way up to the moon!”

Home Setting “How do I look? It’s very stylish with the way it revisits the old-fashioned sort of mummy, isn’t it?”

Home Transitions “If these were my own tentacles, I could move them freely at will, but that’s not true with these bandage wraps. I have to pay close attention to my movements.”

“Of course we have Halloween celebrations under the sea. Although, unlike on land, merpeople don’t exactly wear costumes.”

“I ran into Silver with this costume on, and he yelled ‘The enemy!’ before pulling out a baton. ...He must’ve been half-asleep.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Halloween only happens once a year. Let’s have the time of our lives together.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Did I hear you say ‘Trick or treat’ just now? Offering me of all people a deal is quite bold of you.”

Home Taps “I have an affinity for the costumes Jack and the other Savanaclaw students are wearing. They look like ghosts you’d find at sea, don’t they?”

“I referenced dishes that my family serves for the Lounge’s limited edition menu... Oh, my family runs a ristorante.”

“I’ll hold back on the treats, thank you. Accepting more and more of them will only increase my calorie intake for the day.”

“The reason we chose mummies for our costumes? I’m very unfamiliar with them, which made me all the more curious. After all, you can’t have anything dry under the sea.”

“What are you in such a rush for? I understand feeling excited, but you must be discreet when getting ready to scare someone.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “You must come see Halloween under the sea sometime! It’s just as fun as the academy’s.”

Jack Howl - SR

Unlock Card “Dressing up as pirates fits for Savanaclaw, since the guys here are all brutes. When you want something, you take it!”

Groovy “On Halloween, it’s ghost territory. Make sure you be careful when walking around at night. Grr...”

Home Setting “My scares aren’t just for show.”

Home Transitions “Scarabia dressed up as werewolf ghosts. They really nailed the ears and tails.”

“When we were making jack o’ lanterns, Ruggie kept eating the pumpkin seeds. Do those taste good...?”

“The pirate costume fits Leona really well. He’s lazy and vulgar—ahem! He comes off as strong and powerful.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Happy Halloween! It’s nice with all these decorations and festive energy. Wanna walk around together later?”

Home Transition (Groovy) “I was getting tired of all these sweets, so I got some jerky. Want any?”

Home Taps “Ace and the others swear that anything Trey bakes is to die for. I wonder how his pear compote would... N-No, nevermind.”

“I used to want to be a pirate when I was little. I remember making treasure chests by myself and filling them with coins and sparkling jewels. Those were the days.”

“Pirates have to aim their cannons and do a lot of heavy lifting while onboard. They’ve got to train hard.”

“I almost never wear rings, so I’m scared these might fly off at any moment. Plus it’s hard to move my fingers.”

“Oi! Stop prodding at my costume! What’re you going to do if one of the seashells breaks off?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “You haven’t put on your costume yet? The ghosts will come to kidnap you if you don’t hurry and change.”

Jade Leech - SSR

Unlock Card “I’ve been expecting you. Today I have a most wonderful scare prepared for you.”

“We’ve been working hard to ensure that everyone can spend a wonderful Halloween.”

Groovy “The sight of you screaming as you try to hurry away... It’s irresistible. I cannot hold myself back from chasing after you!”

Home Setting “Who would like to be tied up in fear?”

Home Transitions “You want to see me when I’m frightened? Heheh. I wouldn’t mind you scaring me anytime you’d like.”

“There is no such thing as using pumpkins as lanterns under the sea. I was very shocked learning about culture on land when I was a freshman.”

“Have you had a chance to try out the Mostro Lounge’s limited edition Halloween menu? I contributed a recipe to it.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Trick or treat! Heheh. There’s no need to look so frightened; I won’t bite.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Oh, my. Were you hoping to play a trick on me? I have a treat on hand, so please spare me today.”

Home Taps “I helped Ruggie with making jack o’ lanterns. They’re very quick, cheap, and beautiful. How fitting.”

“Dryness is fatal for merpeople. If we were dried up like a mummy... Just the thought is horrifying.”

“Floyd, don’t eat too many sweets. It’s different while we’re in the water, but here we have a high risk of tooth decay.”

“The draping wraps on our costumes resemble jellyfish tentacles. They’re pretty, aren’t they? I like their asymmetrical design.”

“You seem to have a wish to join the world of mummies. First, I will wrap your whole body in bandages, and then dry you out... I’m only joking.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Halloween under the sea? If you’re interested, I will show you around one day.”

Duo Magic Jade: Azul, we cannot waste any more time. Azul: Let’s be efficient about this, Jade.

Vil Schoenheit - SSR

Unlock Card “Are you prepared to pledge yourself to me? It’s a great honor to be the sustenance of my beauty.”

“If I’m participating in this, then I’m going to aim for quality that transcends all previous Halloweens. Please keep up with me.”

Groovy “How unfortunate; there’s nowhere left for you to run. Yield yourself to me and become my slave.”

Home Setting “You will be a victim to my fangs.”

Home Transitions “Vampires, who possess eternal beauty... This is a perfect theme for me, isn’t it?”

“It would be difficult to check my appearance if I couldn’t see my reflection in the mirror. Perhaps I’d have to check with Rook between every class.”

“The other day, I was drinking tomato juice in the evening, and Epel screamed at me. How rude.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Trick or treat. Although, I don’t need any sweet treats. I’m sure you can guess what a vampire would want... Heheh.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Have you flipped your sleep schedule like a vampire’s because it’s Halloween? Make sure you don’t stay up too late.”

Home Taps “I don’t usually carry around treats with me, so last year I fell victim to Lilia’s tricks. That was honestly unpleasant.”

“You should carefully deliberate over your parasol and choose one that has strong protection from the sun. Don’t forget sunblock either.”

“Floyd’s skin is very beautiful. Makeup sits exceptionally well on moisturized skin, too. Always remember to moisturize.”

“My father is an actor, and for every Halloween he would come home in a costume with special effects makeup. I wonder if perfectionism runs in the family.”

“Even a single strand of hair out of place is something to pay mind to. Could you fix my hair for me?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “My cloak has enough cloth to wrap around a person. Should I hide you inside it if any scary ghosts come by?”

Duo Magic Vil: Let’s end this nonsense right here, Lilia. Lilia: Leave it to me to guard you from behind, Vil.

Cater Diamond - SSR

Unlock Card “I’ll fill you all the way to the bone... with fear, of course ♪”

“Aha! Are you surprised with how off things feel now? Let me show you Cay’s charm, now that I’m a touch different for Halloween~”

Groovy “You’re not thinking you’ll be able to get home safely now that you’ve dug me up, are you?”

Home Setting “Don’t you think my costume’s super aesthetic!?”

Home Transitions “The pumpkin pie Trey always makes this time of year... Mm, it’s not too sweet, and it’s sooo good~!”

“Did you see Lucius today!? He was wearing a super adorable pumpkin hat... I can’t believe Professor Trein~!”

“Sebek-kins really loves Malleus~ He’s got a reputation among the third-years for being the passionate Draconian.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Happy Halloween! How about we take a picture to commemorate?”

Home Transition (Groovy) “I have a feeling this year’s going to be the funnest Halloween we’ve ever had. You should be excited too, Prefect!”

Home Taps “I really like how our skeleton-looking laces are so elegant. Our dorm uniforms give off more cutesy vibes; it’s super different.”

“A black veil holds many mysteries... Heheh. You’re always free to lift it up anytime you want, Prefect! Just kidding.”

“Heartslabyul’s costumes last year? We were pirates! Wish you could see Cay as a pirate~?”

“The whole campus gets super festive and exciting around Halloween! And all the decorations are so photogenic.”

“Black makeup smudges easily, so you kind of need to have advanced skills to use it. Does it look okay right now? It’s not smudged?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “What are you dressing up as, Prefect? Come let me know when you have it ready. I wanna take a pic~”

Duo Magic Cater: “Jack, lend me some of your aesthetic support!” Jack: “This’ll be a breeze, Cater!”

[fe-semi-decent-scenarios]

oooh could you do protective headcanons for the golden deer too??🥺

{I most certainly can. Y’all know I love these tropes so keep ‘em coming. Hope it’s to your liking! :3}

Claude: 

6/10

Neutral, with just a tad bit of nerves. 

Look. Claude has bigger fish to fry than what you’re gallivanting on about during the day. The man has a dream to catch with literally a country and 1/3 (woot woot alliance) on his shoulders. 

First, the future. Then, you. Can’t have a life together if there is no place for it to be had, yeah? 

This doesn’t mean that he never worries about you. Quite the contrary, if he begins then he can’t stop. So he doesn’t tinker the thought. 

Instead he has his most trusted allies at your back. During the Academy days you were left under Hilda’s watchful eye, and during the war you are always nearby (courtesy of matchmaker Prof.Byleth) 

Once he puts a ring on it you’ll have guards. No problem. 

He also trusts your own capabilities. One doesn’t train every day to walk out with nothing  

Also

You make me laugh if you think Claude believes you’ll ever cheat on him 

Not that he’s cocky okay, maybe a bit  but no one would dare put the moves on “The Master Tactician’s” s/o

Any suitor coming your way is peasant fodder. If not to him, than to your own personal retaliation. 

Yupp, nothing to worry about. You’ve got it covered. He’ll only step in if you physically come ask him 

and with a bit of teasing he’ll comply 

However, Claude is very sensitive to illness for obvious reasons. This is why he’s listed at a six. He always insists on tasting your food

It was a gimmick at first, and in the beginning he’d make banter to sneak a bite while you remain all unknowing of his true intentions 

He’ll be damned if someone ever poisons you. They won’t ever get the chance

Ignatz: 

9/10

Let us face it. Iggy is a worry-wart.

He freaks out over the most minuscule of situations. The poor lad nearly gets a heart attack at least once a day 

And no, i’m not just referring to his pre-timeskip self. Ignatz may have grown a head taller, got a backbone, fancy harem artist pants--but no, he did not lose his inner anxious zealot. That trait will cling until the day he dies sadly 

Having you at his side only makes things worse (in a good way. The trouble is worth it to him) 

Especially if you’re more of the risky sort. Expect him to mother hen if you cause ruckus around the monastery. He can and will lecture you to death (only to apologize and hide away after)

Now not only does he worry about his own issues, but also yours. I swear Ignatz acts like you are his second being. If someone scolds you, hurts you, etc. he acts like they did it to him 

Can be a bit dramatic, not gonna lie. He gets so worked up that his ears go red. Like, you can just t e l l he’s holding so much back because he doesn’t want to go too far

Don’t even get me started on if someone tries to make a move on you 

He becomes t o r n. It isn’t his place to tell you who to hang around, but ohmygodwhatifyourealizeheisn’tgoodenough 

iggy no, bad iggy. don’t think like that

He feels threatened so easily and not many would peg him the jealous type. He is, but hides it very well. 

If need be he will talk out his feelings with you. That’s something noteworthy of Ignatz: he uses his words. He may find communicating such thoughts aloud difficult, but if he truly is concerned then he will be honest with you.  

Raphael: 

10/10

Raphael believes in trust. He expects you to be honest and to not keep anything important secret. In return he’ll do the same. 

This is why he doesn’t care if someone is flirting. He could give less of a thought on gossip, rumors, or anything really. That effort can go towards training 

He truly, honest to Sothis, trusts you with all his heart. There isn’t any time to spend doing otherwise. Raph just wants to live happily and that means having you by his side 

Nor does he feel intimidated by anyone else either. I’m not saying that he reeks of resolved confidence, but Raph believes that you love him. Love topples any mindless flirting that other people throw your way 

but let’s get one thing straight 

If anybody, and I mean ANYBODY, tries to hurt you 

This guy’s having them for b r e a k f a s t. Pounded, sliced, and Smoked. The same way he liked his bacon. 

You are his family. Raphael protects his family, and those he cares about. 

You will never be alone. Goddess if you cry and someone else is the cause then he will take action. One fault of Raph is that while he’s a sweetie, he doesn’t think before acting a lot. Similar to Caspar, he just goes for it 

It takes a lot to get underneath Raph’s skin. 

In short: do not f*ck with his loved ones. He would take on Nemisis himself mono-e-mono if it meant protecting them 

Lorenz: 

8/10

Y’all going to sit there and try to convince me that Lorenz Hellman Gloucester doesn’t try to establish dominance? 

Key word: try

He’s quickly shut down

“Lorenz if you tell one more person that we’re betrothed, I swear that I’ll shave off your eyebrows” - You, one month post-confession 

Saying that you’re his perfect match is no excuse. Considering all the preaching he does on noble humility, you’d think he would want your private affairs off the notice board? 

It doesn’t take long for your peers to start complaining. Claude finds his behavior entertaining, but not a day goes by that someone doesn’t beg you to make him shut up 

Lorenz is also a bit old fashioned. He doesn’t like the idea of you fighting more than necessary

Once again, shut down 

Best way to deal with Lorenz is to let him think he has his way, then just do whatever. He gets upset, pouts, spouts his normal lecture, but then relents. All in due process with him 

Never thought I’d say this, but perhaps requesting not to be in the same troop together is the best option? You’d think he would fight better with an S tier relationship at his side? Nahhh. HE TAKES YOUR KILLS IT IS NOT FAIR 

He gives too much attention to what you’re doing, and not the enemy. Best if you stay separated

Ugh pray no one hits on you in front of him. Just... *screams* I don’t think anyone will, just to avoid him getting defensive. I swear the other deer take extensive preventative measures to avoid it.  

Hilda:

6/10

C’mon. This is Hilda we’re talking about 

You two most likely grew closer because she “asks” you for help so often 

Just like Claude, she has bigger fish to fry. The last type of person she wants to be is Holst (she loves him though don’t misinterpret that)

She does worry though 

Not enough to make her take the front lines, but a smidgen. Just to where you’ll get periodic check in’s 

Nothing obvious. A simple “what’s going on?”  as she inquired about your well-being 

A precarious scan-over as she checks for any new scars

She does get jealous though. There’s an entire castle full of available people and someone chooses to flirt with you? 

That just doesn’t make sense. Perhaps the “once something is taken it becomes more desirable,” saying has some truth 

She’s quite the clinger. You’ll just be walking and suddenly, BOOM, bubble-gum pink arm-candy in the corner of your vision

Once you two bypass the ‘puppy-love’ early stages, she changes. 

Despite her negligence beforehand, she does become overprotective   

Will fight if needed. Say you have a paralogue? Just so happens she was nearby and wants to tag along 

She also has to protect you from Holst. My dear, you cannot do that yourself. Brotherly wrath beseeches you, my god. Run dude run 

Marianne: 

3/10

A possessive streak is nonexistent in her blood. Such thing is a personal fear of her’s. Marianne refuses to conform to the stereotypes associated with her crest 

However, she does believe that one day you may leave her side. Marianne isn’t the most confident person. She...doubts 

Often does she wonder if you’re there solely to make her hurt. To love her and then one day disappear without a trace 

Anxieties like so will not go away overnight. She will not seek reassurance, which makes her more uncommunicative than most partners 

but no one is perfect. Neither are you. All you personally can do is politely decline any advances, and do your best to let Marianne know that you love her 

She isn’t particularly protective in any other sense either. She’ll heal you if needed, but special attention isn’t there

Marianne treats being a healer like how an ER doctor operates. On the field, everyone is equal. She is needed everywhere and cannot stay by your side. Otherwise lives will be lost, and that won’t be good for her conscience.

The same goes for all other aspects. If you’re gone, then you’re gone. If you’re sick, then you’re sick. She cannot give you special attention and acts in accordance to severity of the situation. Patients cannot be weighed in value via personal bias 

She has a surprisingly strong sense of self control, let me tell ya.

Lysithea:

7/10

She...does not have much time. Entering a romantic relationship was not a possibility that crossed her mind once before you 

Why bother when the ending is certain? Why leave someone brokenhearted, or a widow? Why give herself that extra stress when she’s already under so much as it is?

You can’t blame her for being extra cautious. While her life may be hanging on a string, that doesn’t mean yours has to end 

After some time she develops a resolve. If needed she would gladly lay her life down if it meant you could live another day 

A problematic conclusion. You two will argue often over how she cannot trade a ‘life for a life,’ just because of her special circumstances. Her mind always enforces that it’s the logical decision, and has trouble recognizing her own value

I suppose that comes with being a know-it-all, huh? Once her mind is set then there is no changing it 

Despite her brain sending all the signals that acting on jealousy is wrong...well, we know Lysithea 

She won’t come out and say she gets protective for your sake. Apparently anyone flirting with you already had business with her

Business that miraculously unfolds once you leave. Then suddenly they no longer have an interest? 

What’d she do? Threaten to shove a thoron up their rectum? No one knows 

Leonie: 

9/10 

She is the mom who’d create a strict morning routine for her kids to follow before school 

Or a thorough itinerary on a vacation 

Not a moment or bullion to be wasted! 

Cannot express enough how much this girl cares. She can become annoying from all the interference, but you’ll never become a bum with her in your life 

You might want to ask her to butt out. Remind her that you’re not one of the kids from her village, and that you can handle yourself 

Sometimes you’ll joke and say “yes mom,” because she gets b o s s y 

Which will earn you either: a) a glare, or b) her playing along and confusing everyone else 

So in a sense, yeah she’s protective. Overbearing in her own Leonie way 

Not the jealous type. Leonie doesn’t look at what other people have, and instead focuses on her own life. If someone wants to shamelessly throw themselves at your feet then that’s their issue. You know better than to cheat on her 

I can see her complaining to the captain or to Byleth though. Why waste time when the issue can easily be solved? Obviously someone with the time to flirt has time to do training drills  

Bonus! Cyril: (because during my first play-through I kept expecting GD to take him under their wing. They did not, and Nintendo missed out.) 

5/10

He personally hates being treated like a child. When someone doesn’t take him seriously Cyril’s self restraint goes b o o m 

So he won’t do that to you. You’re a capable individual and that’s that. Nothing more for him to interfere with 

His only protective streak lies when you’re incapable of doing things yourself. Aka: injured, ill, resting, etc. 

He’ll nag you for not being careful, but it’s not hard to miss the tears pricking his eyes 

He’s also very perceptive towards break-in’s. Many people have tried to kidnap/assassinate people of higher standing. He’s witnessed many attempts towards lady Rhea. I see him taking night shifts for patrol often, and after the war the habit sticks with him.

He takes a lot onto his shoulders often. It’s not bad. Being dedicated is an admirable trait, yet if you’re down someone will have to stop him from picking up the slack. 

He’s no healer, and leaves that job to the professionals. However he doesn’t want anyone to disturb you with the work your missing. So he’ll do it in your stead 

Manuela lets him stay in the infirmary past visitation hours. Mostly because he’s so busy during the day that he can’t come by 

He won’t return to his room those nights. He prefers to be by your side, just in case. 

Other than this type of situation- no, he’s not protective in the slightest.  

[honyakuninakunaru]

With You, Whom I Don't Understand // Mithra SSR Card Story

CHAPTER 1

(Northern ruins)

Mithra: <Arthim>

(Crash)

The moment Mithra’s spell resounded with a dull echo, a curve cut through the giant beast's neck and sent it flying. The rest of its body, now beheaded, swayed back and forth several times in search for its lost neck and once in vain, it let out a chilling cry, turning into stone.

Akira: ("T-that was so quick, I barely grasped what just happened...")

Mithra: "What kind of mana stone is this? It's the size of a pebble."

Akira: "You did a good job, Mithra. Commission completed!"

A commission about a magic beast gone berserk because of the Calamity's effect arrived earlier today, so I asked the northern wizards to come and take care of it, but, Mithra, unsurprisingly, ended up defeating it all by himself.

Snow: "As expected of our one and only Mithry! He took it down in the blink of an eye."

White: "He is the manor’s Ace, after all!"

Akira: "You don't say... I was surprised how quickly it was over with."

Owen: "If that's the case, let Mithra do all of this boring work."

Bradley: "As long as you have him, it's gonna be taken care of in a jiffy, right? You don't gotta ask all of us to come here."

Akira: "I'm sorry...! I didn't think it'd end so soon."

Mithra: "But they're right - we don't need excess luggage."

Bradley: "Come again?"

Mithra: "Am I wrong?"

Owen: "I see you want to turn into stone very badly, should I make that wish of yours become a reality? I'll let you have a taste of Mithra's mana."

Mithra: "There's no way that will ever happen. You're weaker than I am, after all."

Snow: "Certainly, Owen's power at the moment is no match for Mithra's."

White: "Both you and Bradley should put a lot of effort shall you aim to take the place of the manor’s Ace."

Akira: ("They're right, Mithra is our Ace, without a doubt. Even I know how strong he is, but... that's all I know.")

(Dining room)

Akira: "I was hoping I could chat with Mithra a bit more, but he's not here either, even though it's lunch..."

Speaking of what I know about Mithra... I know that he's the second most powerful wizard after Oz, his taste in food is... peculiar, and that he suffers from insomnia because of his injury from the Calamity. And he also made a promise to protect Rutile and Mitile.

Akira: ("I wonder if I'll come to understand him better if we became closer...")

Owen: "Hello, Master Sage."

Akira: "Wha- Owen! What's with you, appearing out of thin air?"

Owen: "You ought to prepare for the summoning ceremony of new wizards. Because if not, those guys will surely get killed by Mithra. "

Akira: "Killed...!? Wait a minute, what do you mean by that!?"

Owen: "Go to the tower. Something very fun is happening there."

CHAPTER 2

(Running footsteps)

(In front of the tower)

Akira: "Excuse me! I heard that some sort of trouble happened here and I came to check!"

Rutile: "You arrived just at the right time, Master Sage!"

Mitile: "Mister Mithra wouldn't let us go!"

Mithra: "You're so noisy... Please sit still and behave."

Akira: ("He's holding them by the scruff of the neck like kittens...?")

Figaro: "Hi there, Sir Sage."

Akira: "Figaro, Lennox, just what happened here?"

Lennox: "The four of us were just heading over to the Southern country when Mithra came to stop us."

Mithra: "Because there's no way I could let them go there. I would be in trouble if you two went somewhere where I can't see you. I can't allow you to do that, because you're weak."

Akira: ("Ah, right, Owen doesn't know about the promise, so he probably thought Mithra was hurting them or something...")

Rutile: "Mister Mithra, please let us go. We're going on a day trip to visit mother and father's graves, together with everyone else from the South."

Mithra: "Grave visiting or not, it doesn't matter. Even if it's just a day trip, that won't change the fact that I won't be able to keep an eye on you."

Lennox: "Then, why don't you go instead of us two?"

Akira: "You want Mithra to go?"

Lennox: "Rutile and Mitile said they're worried, so we suggested to accompany them."

Figaro: "It does take a while to get to the City of Clouds. You have to fly for a bit after arriving at the tower, and it can be dangerous when going past the mountains, not to mention."

Mithra: "..... <Arthim>"

Mithra: "Come on, let's get this over with."

Mitile: "Wha!? Wait a minute, Mister Mithra!"

Rutile: "A-alright, then! See you later, Mister Leno, Doctor Figaro!"

Figaro: "Yep, have a safe trip. Ah, how about you go as well, Master Sage?"

Akira: "Me?"

Figaro: "You're always dealing with the requests we get, and you're doing your very best, you deserve to go and get some healing over at the South."

Akira: "Um, if you say so... I'm off, then!"

(City of Clouds)

Akira: ("Well, that was quick... Mithra's Door of Space sure is handy.")

Citizen: "Would ya look at that! More people are turning up!"

Rutile: "My, you came too, Master Sage! Hello everyone. These are our precious friends from the manor - Master Sage and the northern wizard, Mithra."

Citizen: "Ooh, the Sage and a wizard from a different country, you say! You and Mitile seem to get along with everyone at the manor, what a relief."

Akira: ("They know Mithra's from the north but, they're acting friendly nonetheless... I wonder if it's because they don't have a prejudice against wizards.")

Rutile: "We're going over to the graveyard right now, would you two like to join us as well?"

Mithra: "I'm not going."

Despite the way he spat out his reply, an expression, different from his usual one, had shown itself on Mithra's face.

CHAPTER 3

Akira: ("Mithra, what happened... That's not like you...") 

Akira: "I appreciate the offer, but I'll have to decline as well. You two should go and enjoy your day with your parents. I'll take my time to look around the South—"

Mithra: <Arthim>

Mithra: "I'll come to pick you up later. Please don't touch anything strange-looking under any circumstances."

Akira: "Whoa, Mithra!?"

Mithra forcefully grabbed my hand and pulled me into the Door of Space, that had suddenly appeared.

(Tycho Lake)

Akira: "...This is...Tycho Lake? Why did you bring us here?"

Mithra: "I wonder why myself. I simply felt like coming."

Akira: "I-I see... This is a place full of Rutile and Mitile's parents' memories, isn't it."

Mithra: "Yeah."

Akira: "... S-speaking of, I've seen a mermaid here before."

Mithra: "Is that so..."

Akira: ("He's so absent-minded... But I wonder why... He looks so lonely...")

Mithra: "....."

(Splash)

Akira: "Wha!? W-what's with you all of a sudden, Mithra! Hold on... I-it's quite de—...!?"

(Screen fades to black)

(Bubble-bubble)

Akira: ("Who knew the lake was this deep... This is bad! I'll drown!")

(Splish-splash)

I felt my body, sinking just moments ago, getting forcefully pulled upward.

The very first thing I saw, was Mithra's evergreen eyes.

Mithra: "What are you doing?"

Akira: "Cough... S-sorry. And thank you. ...Although, I should be the one asking what you were doing. Why did you suddenly dive in like that?"

Mithra: "Well, you said there were mermaids in there, so I thought we could catch some for dinner."

Akira: "Um. Are you sure you can eat...mermaids...?"

Mithra: "They do sound tasty."

Akira: "I-I wonder about that..."

Mithra: ".....Why did you jump in?"

Akira: "Why you ask? Well, probably because... I wanted to help you...?"

Mithra: "Help? You? Me?"

Akira: "Yes..."

Mithra, who blinked in bewilderment, immediately laughed with the innocence of a young boy.

Mithra: "Ahaha. You're the only person in this world who'd ever think about coming to my aid, aren't you?"

Akira: "That's..."

Mithra: "...Oh well, I'm grateful. You're the one who was drowning moments ago, though."

Akira: "Yeah, sorry about that. Thank you for saving me."

Mithra: "That much I can do."

(City of Clouds)

Rutile: "Goodness, you two are completely soaked!"

Mitile: "You're gonna end up catching a cold like this! I'll go fetch you some towels, okay?"

Mithra: "No need, our clothes are going to dry up quickly. More importantly, let's get going if you're done here."

Mitile: "Geez, you're so self-centred...!" 

Akira: ("...As I thought, I don't understand Mithra very well. But, if possible, I'd like to get to know more about him from now on.")

Mithra: "Come now, you're coming with us too. It's going to cause me trouble if I can't keep an eye on you."

The Lake's Fortune // Card Training Story

(Lounge)

Akira: "Is swimming a strong suit of yours, Mithra?"

Mithra: "And what brought this about?"

Akira: "I just thought that you swam very naturally in the Tycho Lake, even though it's so deep your legs don't reach the bottom."

Mithra: "Well, yes, I am skilled at it since I grew up at a lakeshore."

Akira: "The northern lakes are always frozen, so I had the impression that you couldn't swim in them, but apparently you can."

Mithra: "There are times when they aren't. Well, it's only the surface that's frozen. Under that layer, it's just normal water."

Akira: "Brr, sounds so cold... When told 'frozen lake' the only thing that comes to mind is pond smelt fishing."

Mithra: "Pond smelt fishing?"

Akira: "It's a type of small fish from my world. You make a hole on the frozen water's surface and fish through it. Were there edible fish in the lake you used to swim in?"

Mithra: "There was some fish-looking creature that would jump out with great vigour in response to noise, and sometimes it would pierce into my neck."

Akira: "That's quite the aggressive fish! When fried, pond smelts taste really yummy."

Mithra: "... Now I'm craving fish. I'll go over to Tycho Lake to catch some real quick."

Akira: "R-Right now?"

Mithra: "Yes. Are you coming as well?"

Akira: "Yeah, but give me a minute to check what's left for today's schedule—"

Mithra: "No, we are going immediately, <Arthim>."

[bubblesthemonsterartist]

*cracks knuckles* Clearly I’m going straight for the Blackout. 

ENJOY, FRIENDS. FOR YOU, I THROW IT UNDER THE CUT

Under 1000 Words

take my burdens (and bury them deep) by @thelionshymnal​ Rated M Nothing makes me happier than a fic of my favorite BroTP, especially when Obi is offering to disappear Kiki’s dirty dealings. Content warning for attempted sexual assault and Obi doing what he does best: getting rid of the body.

A Fic That Got You Involved In Fandom

Seven Suitors for Shirayuki by @sabraeal​ Rated T Look. You all are just going to have to accept that there is a certain generation of this fandom that was dragged in, kicking and screaming, by this fic. I wanted to diversify by saying something else managed it, but no. It was the fact that this story was stuck on chapter five for MONTHS that made me vibrate until my own fic fell out. XD

Made You Laugh Out Loud

An Extra Rise Before Dawn by @sabraeal​ Rated G I don’t often worry that I am going to pee from laughing so hard when I’m reading something, but this one definitely does. In one spot in particular. You might be able to guess it. It is simultaneously an incredible sweet and incredibly funny fic that hits all the right notes for me.

Favorite Trope Reversal

Fussing with Firedrakes by @leewritingrecs​ Rated T 1) Dragons. 2) Damsel in distress is no damsel and she is NOT in distress thank you very much 3) Kiki is a DRAGON 4) Obi is cursed, and 5) DID I MENTION D R A G O N S ???

Fic That Made You Friends With the Author

The Wide Florida Bay by @sabraeal​ Rated E I had to think about this because while I read Seven Suitors first, this was the series that made me start sending anons and eventually made me join tumblr where I proceeded to endlessly play the ‘what if’ game with Jen. CLEARLY this is where our friendship was forged.

Action-Packed Fight Scene

Agent, Parts I, II, and III by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated T Like Jen, I was positively torn, because both Andi and Sarah do fight scenes SO WELL, but Agent ultimately won out because there is just something so delightful about Shirayuki flailing and clinging to Obi like a cat that doesn’t want to go in the bath while arrows zip all around them

Edit: Screw it, I’m reccing them both

Republic of Tanbarun by @claudeng80​ Rated T An action adventure series where romance is involved but is by no means the focus. Zen and Obi adventures abound. Politics galore. And some masterfully done slow-motion to quick motion fight scenes that I L O V E D

Gen Fic

Fugue in Three by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated G Ryuu casually destroys Obi and Shirayuki by breathing as they count down the days until he comes of age. Technically this fic has a romantic pairing, but it is by no means the focus of this fic. If you don’t agree, you are welcome to meet me under the Big Oak between the hours of 12 and 4 for a duel.

Missing Scene

Like Brothers Do by @claudeng80​ Rated G Obi is clearly Kiki’s annoying big brother and handles Mitsuhide’s rejection in the best way he knows how. Also read: Mitsuhide gets what’s coming to him. (ง'̀-'́)ง

Canon Divergent

We work at the mall by @kaedix​ Rated T With how many AUs we got floating around this fandom, I was hard pressed to choose a favorite. But there is just something so sweet and wholesome and American teenager about this. It just latches onto you and never lets go. (Also the gang all work at my favorite places in the mall when I was growing up. What’s not to love?)

Steamiest Kiss

Were Hearts Not An Unknown Country by @sabraeal​ Rated T LOOK. SOMEONE was going to have to go dig this out of the rubble of her compilation fics and it might as well be me. Also the birthplace of the much loved AnS fandom practice of solstice kissing.

Contains Your Favorite Headcanon

The road to Clarines is Gravel by @codango​ Rated E Not the focus of the fic as a whole, but like, Torou and Obi are siblings. GALAXY MIND EXPLOSION. I mean, I loved that so much that I wrote a pre-canon fic of this fic. Additional note totally not related to the bingo square: I will ALWAYS be here for positive sex worker representation in fics. Fair warning, though, this is the most unfair AU in existence because the brain screams that it SHOULDN’T WORK and yet by some sort of writerly sorcery, it DOES. PLEASE READ IT IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY.

Wept Real Tears

let it make you by @thelionshymnal​ Rated M It’s not every day that someone manages to write a fic that makes me stare numbly at the very first line for a solid 15 minutes, big fat tears rolling down my cheeks, but Hymn did it. And then she somehow managed to kiss it better. All in 1100 words.

Free Space

AnS Role Swap AU by @owlsshadows​ Rated M This series has it all. Shirayuki as an assassin. Obi as both a royal bastard and a pharmacist. A mysterious meeting out in the woods where it makes you question whether Nanaki and Obi are two different people or the same. Also Zen having some very conflicted feelings regarding his royal authority and how he can choose to handle rejection.

Edit: Since I’ve already doubled up once, let me double up again, I have so much love to give and not enough space to give it!

Blizzard by @nebluus​ Rated T This is one of the earliest fics I read in this fandom and it remains to date one of my absolute favorites. Obi gets hurt protecting his Miss and a blizzard rolls in. Thankfully they find a cabin where Obi, who is definitely on his death bed if no one finds them and SOON, proceeds to still fuss over his Miss. Best scene: When he warms her hands with his. Also the second chapter is all sorts of delightful domesticity I IMPLORE you to please read it and soon.

Favorite Fan-Made OC

All Pain Will Turn to Medicine by @sabraeal​ Rated M All y’all should’ve seen these coming from ten miles out. I fucking LOVE Herr Anda, the cantankerous little bastard. And Jen knows this because she designed him specifically with me in mind. Academic catnap >:|

AU That Made You Find the Source Material

All Knotted Up by @sabraeal​ Rated G Admittedly, there are a great many AUs out there that made me look up the source material, but this Tangled AU is the most recent because I finally got on Disney+. And yes, Mitsuhide is the horse. Ryuu may be Pascal a little bit, but Mitsuhide. He’s The Horse. XD

First AnS Fic You Read

Loyalty by Evelyn Fiedler Rated K+ (which is basically G on AO3) My one and only ff.net rec from my earliest days in the fandom when I was combing for absolutely any content I could find, begging the fandom to help me decide if I was down for Obiyuki and all that it implied and this author most assuredly delivered.

Favorite Minor Character

Undertow by @jhalya​ Rated E The fic itself is a space odyssey of sorts. One mission among many where humanity attempts to colonize Mars. However the real selling point here, if you didn’t know, is Lord Seiran. He is a delightfully eccentric billionaire who clearly always wanted a large family, judging from how easily he fills out the adoption paperwork.

WIP

Caulk dirty to me by @leewritingrecs​ Rated E Have I mentioned I love the sex worker trope? I. Love. The. Sex. Worker. Trope. Also Obi is clearly divine at all of his jobs. Shirayuki already got to experience his skills at one of them. I wait with BAITED BREATH for her to experience the other :3

Canon Compliant

Thicker than Blood by @infinitelystrangemachinex​ Rated G In the aftermath of the death of King Kain, Izana and Zen must decide on which path they will take moving forward. Amazing fic. Unfinished, but a wonderful look into the dynamics between the Wisteria brothers and their absent mother.

One-Shot

Worth his Weight in Rice by @claudeng80​ Rated T AU set in an Edo-adjacent Period where a disease has wiped killed off a significant portion of the male population. Resulting societal shifts occur. If you go into the comments, I have a couple of pages worth of reasons why I love this AU, but what I appreciate even more is how you have an absolutely perfect oneshot in this fic. It is a well-translated universe where we get a delightful clear, beginning, middle, and end, all in 5k. NOT an easy feat. Please enjoy.

Rare Pair

the fog pushing through my mind by @thelionshymnal​ Rated E Obi/Yuzuri, friends with benefits. Two pining idiots with some sore feelings decide to get stoned and take comfort in another warm body for the night. I just really enjoyed the casual intimacy of the encounter and how this is clearly neither of their first experiences with a one night stand. Neither of them are going to make it weird in the morning, they just need to take the edge off, ya know? Additional bonus for Obi being ready to stab the dumbasses who made Yuzuri feel like she was a weirdo in her past.

AU You Took a Chance On (And Now Love)

Lightning in a Bottle by @jhalya​ Rated M I mean, if Jules is gonna play dirty by making Obi the hot fish man running around without his shirt on 99% of the time, then of COURSE I’m going to enjoy Deep Blue Sea. It’s, like, one of my favorite movies now.

Favorite Trope

Moonshine Phantom by @leewritingrecs​ Rated T We got a murder muffin who ALSO used to be a sex worker? Sign me the fuck up, I am 1000% here for this. Also all the showgirls who clearly love their coworker and only want him and his adorable wife to have the best. They may have never heard of her before, but she looks sweet, and they all have a silent agreement between them that if she breaks his heart, they’ll cut her.

Fic That Gave You a New OTP

What the Heart Wants by @sabraeal​ Rated G Haruto/Mukaze. An attempted kidnapping and subsequent rescue makes Zen and Shirayuki painfully aware that their parents have had, at some point in their lives, sex. Izana may not be happy about someone banging his mom, but is HE rather pleased at having a new sister. >:3c

Pre-Canon

The Wolf in the Woods by @krispy-kream​ (YES I STILL HAVE THIS BOOKMARKED) Rated G Everyone knows that I have very delicate food feels and this ALMOST went under the Wept Real Tears category, but I like to spread out the crying as much as possible XD Shirayuki finds a boy at the edge of the wood and decides he needs something to eat. Filed under: Guaranteed to wreck me in 500 words or less.

[diaryofabeautyfiend]

Small Time Witch (32)

S I X M O N T H S L A T E R

Vanaheim had been kind to you but it was time to make your next move. Loki had been pardoned on Asgard. The convergence was nigh and preparations for Malekith had begun. Asgard was fortified as a precaution. You thought maybe Malekith wouldn’t bother since the entire universe knew you had the stones. The small council was not so sure. They wanted you locked away in a secure location where he couldn’t find you. You wanted to fight. That’s all you seemed to want these days.

Malekith and Frigga have long been enemies. His brute murdered her when the dark elves invaded Asgard. You would only hide if she hid with you. Being ever stubborn she declined. You didn’t tell her what would happen but, because of your insistence, she could guess. “If it’s my time, it’s my time. I won’t hide.” Everyone in this family was ridiculously stubborn. You fit right in.

Loki fought you ad nauseam about expelling the stones. You refused to even entertain the thought until the convergence was over. He thought the stones were overtaking you. They changed your personality. You argued they just made you stronger and perhaps he was threatened by you. That never failed to spur him into a tirade about how dangerous they were and how no one knew what they were doing to you. The voice in your head told you otherwise. He would prattle on about how they seemed to speak for you. How you had changed. You never listened.

“Mortal are you listening?” It drove you insane when he called you mortal. Just a constant reminder that you were beneath him.

“I am. And I’ve asked you to please stop calling me mortal.”

“Well aren’t you? Are you now unable to die? Have I missed something?”

“As long as I have them I am.”

“And that’s why you shouldn’t have them. Where is my wife? You were not this war mongering battle hardened warrior when I first met you.”

“You prefer me weak? Too afraid of my own shadow?”

He knelt in front of you to look in your eyes. “I have never known you to be weak, Y/N. You were powerful enough.”

You laughed but the smile on your lips never met your eyes. “Just enough that I couldn’t ever take you.”

“Stop it. That’s never mattered to me.”

“Until I became stronger than you.”

He picked up a pillow off of the bed and smashed it into his face. He let out a deep growl out of sheer frustration. “Your new found obsession with power is exactly why I am worried. They need you. They are like parasites and you are their host. You feed them, darling. Of course they don’t want to give you up.”

“And what if I do release them? What then? Do we just wait for the next maniac to use them against us?”

“Then we keep them locked in the vault.”

“Oh yeah, because Odin’s vault has never been breached.”

“Only by me.” He hated fighting with you. Absolutely loathed it. You kept putting off the release of the stones but he wouldn’t give up. You were scared they would fall into the wrong hands. He was afraid they already had. The only other person who was in your corner was Odin.

Loki knew his father all too well. He was not interested in what you wanted but what your power could do for him. He treated you like his own sentient weapon. Your daddy issues completely clouded your judgement in regards to Odin. He doted on you. Called you his daughter. You lapped it up. When Loki or Thor would say something he would laugh it off and say they were jealous that he had a new favorite child. After Asgard was safe, they thought it was time for you to go back to Midgard for a while for an extended holiday. Maybe your family could talk some sense into you.

“My love. My little queen. Please don’t be cross with me. I am simply worried for your safety and sanity. Don’t you want to leave all of this behind? Perhaps we can start our family. I’ve longed to see you with child.”

Your voice was quiet, “That’s not my dream. It’s yours. You know how I feel about having children. Can’t we just go on forever having adventures?”

“Pet, I have had my fun. I just want to start a family and be settled. I don’t care if I ever ride into another battle. Children or not, I just want this constant upheaval to end. I quite liked our life on Midgard. I actually miss television. Why don’t we go back and rebuild our little cottage? Will you at least think about it?”

You kissed the tip of his nose, “I will. When this is all over, I will agree to take extended leave and visit my family.”

—————————————————————

The day Malekith invaded was like deja vu for Loki except he was not in the dungeon. The dark elves were unable to breech the outer reaches of Asgard so they moved on to Greenwich where he and Thor would meet. Against your better judgement (and certainly Loki’s), you jumped the portal to help Thor. You served as nothing but a distraction. Thor was nearly crushed by Malekith’s ship. Had it not been for Dr. Selvig, Thor would have been killed.

Your magic destroyed half of a library and a lot more property. When law enforcement arrived they thanked Thor for his help. You, on the other hand, were put in shackles and taken into custody. Thor tried to stop them but they were under strict orders from the World Security Council to take you in.

You tried to break free for your bonds but your magic wouldn’t work. “Stop resisting, Princess.” one of the Interpol officers shouted. They didn’t have regular guns pointed at you. They looked like ray guns or something you’d see in a sci fi movie. Thor rushed behind you asking where you were being taken. They muttered something about an Air Force base as officers held him back.

“I’m coming, little sister! Just hang on.”

They had you locked in the back of a van that was caged and padded. A thick metal partition separated you from the driver. The doors on the back were also thick metal. Three officers wearing helmets rushed in in a practiced military style drill. Keeping their weapons trained on you, one officer stood in front of you and pressed a button that magnetized your restraints. He stuck your hands to a small but sturdy loop on the bench you sat on. Another officer put a mutant inhibitor collar around your neck while the third jabbed a needle in your arm. “Nighty night, Princess.”

When you awoke your head was pounding. There was a jumpsuit on the small table next to you. On the floor were socks and slippers. The collar was pretty heavy and seemed to grab at your skin when you pulled. “It won’t come off Mrs. Odinson” a voice said. There was a speaker just above the door.

“Where am I?”

“Change into your jumps.”

“Where am I? Don’t make me ask again.”

“Change into your jumps, prisoner.”

You tried to use your magic but only a tiny spark flickered between your hands.

Your cell doors opened and a familiar face stood in front of you. “Ma’am. I’m Coulson. Come with me.”

“Wait. Aren’t you...”

“Dead? As in your husband killed me? Yeah. Something like that.” He stood in the doorway looking at you expectantly. “Unless you’d rather stay here.”

You followed behind him flipping off the speaker when you left. “Can you remove this collar, Coulson?”

“Please forgive me if I’m not super trusting.”

“Understandable I guess. Where are you taking me?”

“New York. Into S.H.I.E.L.D. custody. It’s the only way the US government will release you. Part of the MCA.”

“MCA?”

“Mutant Control Act. You’re an unregistered omega level mutant. Your powers, as defined by the government, are unlimited. You’re dangerous.”

“So when I’m on Earth, I am a prisoner?”

“When you’re on Earth? You think you’re leaving? You belong to us now.”

He took you along to an airstrip where you boarded a small plane. He helped you into your seat, shackled your wrists and ankles and bid you a safe flight.

——————————————————————

Thor was too scared to tell Loki you were captured. He would have been pissed at the both of you. If he thought you were in danger he would rip Midgard apart to find you. The only person he knew to contact was Steve Rogers.

In Tony’s infinite wisdom, he named Steve his successor of sorts. He called him the Chief Moral Compass of the company. That gave Steve all kinds of contacts and diplomatic immunity in 46 countries.

Steve met your flight at the base in New York. Coulson was thrilled to see Steve again but he wouldn’t release you. He got into the backseat and went with you to the facility where you’d be staying.

You waited for several hours in a holding room. You hadn’t eaten in a couple of days and your body was exhausted without the stones to prop you up. You fell asleep with your head on the table. Finally Steve came in to wake you.

“Hey, Y/N. You’re free to go. Get this collar off of her now!” he said to an agent.

“Can we grab something to eat? I haven’t had anything in a couple of days.”

He planted his hands on his hips and clenched his jaw. You were freaking Asgardian royalty and a human being. Surely that earned you some respect. He was livid. “Seriously, guys? You couldn’t have gotten her food? My apologies, Princess.”

“I would kill for a slice. Ever hear of Joe’s Pizza in Brooklyn?”

He smiled, “Best in New York. How do you know about that place?”

“I was in love with a guy from Brooklyn once.”

“Yeah? What happened?”

“He couldn’t handle who I was.”

Steve chuckled to himself, “Then he didn’t deserve you.”

——————————————————————

Pending a hearing, you were released to your mother’s care. You absolutely could not prevent Loki from coming any longer. When he landed you were sitting in the open space where your house would be built.

“This is the perfect spot isn’t it?” You were picking blades of grass and letting them fall through your fingers.

“Afelheim has ample space for cottage building. No cable though. I guess this rules out our extended holiday.” He sat next to you and you rested your head on his shoulder.

“I think this is our extended holiday. My hearing isn’t for another month.”

“You know what you did was careless and stupid right? Also incredibly arrogant. Thor didn’t need your help.”

“I know. I don’t know what came over me. It’s like I wasn’t thinking.”

“You weren’t. The stones were. While we’re stuck here, I’d like to get as many people as possible involved in removing them and healing you. That’s even if you can be healed. Your body could be riddled with cancer like poor Jane.”

“Well I’ve saved her from that fate.”

“Not yourself. If I lost you....”

“You’re not losing me.”

You snuggled against him and he kissed the top of your head. He no longer tried to hide his feelings from you. He was afraid. You just found each other again and he was afraid he would lose you. The old Loki would have run screaming. This Loki would fight for you. And, if he had to, he would follow you into Hel. Maybe he was selfish in that regard. He lost you once. Never again.

[fiore-rosewood9]

14 and 23?

Thank you for the ask kind tumbrl-er. Before I start I would like to mention that anything I say is related to personal experiences in a fandom and there is no right or wrong answer. People come in all shapes and sizes and that also means - Different sets of experience.

TRIGGER WARNING - Mentions of slurs, r*pe, p*dophilia, creepy behavior, mentions of psychological analysis on a character, personal experiences with fandoms and a long rant. If any of these disturb you, please refrain from reading this and skip this post. This is not meant to cause drama, but I had to involve them to explain my point. I also mention sensitive topics like the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, 9/11 and the r*pe of Nanking, if you are related to any of these or have someone you know who died during this time, please refrain from reading, because I was extremely emotional and cried a bit while I wrote these, because what I wrote still has an effect on me.

Again, this is not meant to bash/hate on any ship mentioned here.

This is not meant as a personal attack for anyone who ships these. Also this may be a rant, I apologize for writing a whole novel and not a short answer, but I feel passionate about what I write here. This is going to be a really long post, so I do not blame you if you don't read all of it. I am going to mention a lot of things that are not related to the ships, but they do have significance in my mind and are related to my rant. With that out of the way, my answer is under the cut -

14 - Has a fanbase ever made you ship or not ship something? Why?

Yeah, I have been forced and threatened to ship certain things, via texts which made me leave certain fandoms. Hetalia is a cespool simply because I have been in it 8-9 years and can speak confidently about what happened to me. I thought the hate and immature fans in hetalia all left by the time it was 2016-17 but nope, there are still bad apples here and there. I just try to tell them I am not here for childish games and I am not here to debate which ship is the ''best'' since that is what certain people did all the way back in 2013. I am here just to enjoy my self and reblog fan art and headcanons and talk about hetalia and other fandoms and appreciate the manga/anime.

- Ciel x Sebastien (Sebastien is just there for Ciel's soul) I mean he does care for him in some aspect and I think he said something like - "I will always be with you til the day you die, my lord". There is a normal age gap between adults, and then there is lowkey p*dophilia. How old was Ciel anyway ? 12-13? Even though he is a teen, at this age people are not really mature in many aspects. I have collegues who have what you may call ''Sugar daddies'' in the west and let me tell you, they don't really act nice to their sugar babies. Unless it is some sort of consensual sex roleplay and you are living in a fantasy with your partner, most girls and boys I see feel ''trapped'' by their words.

The sugar daddy (In rare cases mummy) exploites them for attention and tends to lash out if the baby looks at their phone and doesn't pay 100 percent attention to them and tries to buy their attention which is simply wrong. Okay, I moved way offtopic, but certain ships kinda remind me of this unhealthy dynamic in a way. I know my opinion isn't worth shit since this is the internet and everyone thinks they're the next new hot thing around here but I just see them as servent and master and more like frenemies where Sebastien would do anything for Ciel, but you see, that is kinda his job. Just like how doctors act professional and it is their job to cure/heal you if you have some sort of pain.

- Izuku Midoriya x Bakugou Katuski - (I was in this fandom for a short time and only watched up to a certain season so please excuse me if I what I say is not accurate, this is also a long rant so you can skip if you want, in the last two paragraphs I explain about the pairing speciffically) So like from what I remember Katsuki is a bully. I really despise this ship, purely because bullying to me is not something cutesy and fun that people do. It makes you wish you kill your self faster because self harm no longer works. There was this weird person on tumbrl that sent me hate through tumbrl and I made a post about them, how I was a ''bad person'' for hating on this ship. I mean, I am allowed to dislike and even hate what I want. It is not you who has went through trauma and has CPTSD is it? In my high school, even though it was an economical one, except learning Economics, Accounting, Finances and other stuff I also got to learn things like Psychology, Ethics, History and Geography.

And each subject is tough, as in - You can't pass high school if you don't know the details. Except the book that we used in school that we learnt our lessons from, we were also made to carry two other books that we used for exercises, and other than that we had books that were by different authors, we had to read, but they didn't lift our grade in any way. So I have learnt psychology and world history for 4 years in high school and I learnt world history and world geography for 3 years in middle school. And now the first year in Uni, I got to learn psychology for year too. They also made us buy 9-10 books by different psychologists and write about them. From what I hear from my americans friends and collegues, they kinda don't teach you world history, it is like unless you know all of Thomas Jefferson's favourite foods you will be failed. I don't know if this is true, but judging by how they teach what Communism and Socialism is, in the american schools, I am kinda losing hope for what americans actually know about the outside world, aka, anything that is not the US and Canada.

I am not a psychologist and I have never studied to be one, but my own problems and the problems of my family and friends made me start reading even before high school in order to self improve as a human being because I have - Fatal flaws. I also have a few mental illnesses whcih have been diagnosed by psychiatrists, but where I live, mental health and the lgbtq+ is extremely shamed. This is why I never tell anyone I go to a psychologist, because people don't understand you and laugh at you and shame you. The lgbtq is harassed and can't marry or adopt children, however, this somehow is not a hatecrime. Which extremely frustrates me since this is against human rights in my book. You can't just harass a person for their sexuality. I may not have a phd in psychology but I naturally tend to help people and listen to their problems. It seems that I also give good advice and help people well, so sometimes in friend groups I am know as the ''heart'' and the ''psychologist''. I say that because I know a lot more than 4-5 articles that I read on psychology today, healthline or verywellmind, while people nowdays read a few articles and call them selves a psychologist. I am not one, but have the skills and knowledge to be one and can spot articles with old outdated information that hasn't been relevant in the past 30 years or so.

But that is the majority of people, who concider it a mental illness and base the lgbtq on what stereotypes they see on TV and what their parents told them. The internet is made for global use and that means that anyone can write all kinds of shit and use it. However there are a lot of problems with this when it comes to psychology and psychologists and psychriatrists. Many people still believe myths and things that were proven to be wrong. For example, in my country the word - Autist/Autistic, can be used as a slur, it is similar to what the Americans have in the - N and R words. And this is extremely upsetting, because while I am not on the spectrum, I don't think anyone should be degraded and be shamed of this label. Autism is a spectrum, but here it is used to signify that someone is slow. They're not slow, their brain just works differently. But that can be used for other illneses too. I think anyone suffering from mental illness deserves the support of family and friends and a normal life. I think anyone who is a decent and kind human being deserves a peaceful life.

So in real life Bakugou x Izuku would be a crap pairing. Because bullies x their victims do not mix well. Bullies in real life are cowards. They're like predators in the jungle. They are not real leaders. They always settle for someone who is clearly weak and vulnerable (This case - Izuku has no quirks and is useless in their world) so being beaten up, emotionally and verbally bullied isn't really fun. On top of that, when a bully develops an unhealthy dynamic, other people of the group, who never oroginally bullied the victim and were neutral or even friends, go and bully the victim, because they can and they will. Usually victims are powerless and telling the teacher and sometimes beating up the bully doesn't really make the bully leave you alone and respect you. And sometimes, you end up in the hospital with a broken leg and an arm and small injuries in your chest because bullies can't handle anyone standing up to them and ruining their status. Bullies have extreme, neurotic fear of being alone, so they find other assholes and bitches like them and attack always people - Who never did anything to them to insult them.

The bullies create it them selves. No one is an easy victim, not the person who wears glasses, not the anorexic girl that sits on the first desk, not the boy in a wheel chair, not the man with a stutter, not the woman covered in scars, no one. It is also a fact that schools profit from bullies since bullies usually have rich parents that think their child is somr sort of angel when in reality their child loves to make others cry and hits them when they don't get what they want. The problem with bullies is that they are hard to stop. Sometimes telling them off works, sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes punching them works, sometimes it doesn't. Etc. We can't predict which bully is bluffing and which bully is serious and will beat you up. They do not realize or care that they hurt their victims, even if the victim becomes a millionaire, to them, this person will always be inferior weakling that they need to torture psychologically and make them cry. They're sadistic. Bakugou from what I remember became jealous and only stopped bullying Izuku when he became ''strong'' that means strong physically. And for boys, it is generally easier, you hit the gym and no one bullies you. But what if you are a girl? I don't see girls being more respected or feared for being muscular. It is kinda like the jock x nerd. Cute in theory, but in reality it is beyond abusive. Even if the victims kill them selves bullies do not care. They just move on to another victim and are proud that they broke someone and are not as weak as them.

America x England - (OOOOH BOY, HOW MUCH DO I WANT TO BE CANCELED, HAHA) Well, as someone who has been 9 years in this fandom, I have a long history with this pairing. I do not know if I ever explained why do I hate it so much? I have a long and complicated history with it. This where my inner historian comes in. My uncle is a professor in history, but not in our city and we are not very close but I was always interested in history, but now I am a bit skeptical when it comes to history, because you never know how someone can twist it since history is written by the winners. Whatever I say in this post, is not meant to cause drama or offend anyone. From now on I am going to use, vulgar language and this may not be suitable for some readers

This is not meant to be hateful towards people who ship it, but I hate this ship, with passion. This has to be the worst ship, in the fandom history, ever. If you want, feel free to block me if that triggers you. I don't know from where to begin, since I am going to get canceled if I speak my own personal truth and my experiences. I have read the manga when I was 13-14 and have matured since then. The hetalia fandom in the past was more different than in 2021. So like there were ship wars, fan arts, roleplaying, everyone cosplayed hetalia and homestuck since they were the biggest fandoms, Carley Rae Japsean's song Call me maybe was blasting on the radio, Gagnam style was the shit and life was good. I was young, naive, full of hope and looking for fandoms to join in, since it is was a relativly new concept for me. I did not know what these cutesy boys I saw on deviant art were so I decided to scroll down through the comments to see what it was, and I read the name - Hetalia. If you then pay me one million dollars/euro and tell me that Hetalia is going to be my favourite anime and the fandom I stay the longest in - I would have rejected the money and not believe you. Pshht, Hetalia? What does this anime about personification of countries has that the other animes don't? Well, to that question, I can't answer and still ask my self.

When I first came into the fandom I only knew about it from deviant art and from a site called - Shamchat. This site no longer exists and has a site specifically made to fill the hole of it. I roleplayed and I think my happiest years in the fandom were 2013-2015. Those were the years where I met really, really kind fans. It is like everything else went downhill and the kind and sweet fans left one by one. And I was just left with hateful immature tweens and teens who only cared about their OTP and didn't care about other fans's emotions. I apologize if this sounds like a pitful story and I am pitying me, I did not mean it to sound it this way, or as a whining. I do not like whining.

They also seem strangely neurotic if you ask them why they ship UsUk. I can perfectly tell you why I ship anything without being mean. They just straight up insult you and send you passive agressive smileys - : ) - like this and never explain why they insult you, they just curse you. I do not understand why you make America to be the top? When he is clearly a power bottom?????? I mean, if you ever look through canon manga England and him as a country in a history book you wouldn't think he is a ''uke'' (I really hate the little girls who use japanese and think they kniw the language just cause they watched the anime and think they're quirky if they saw kawaii out loud). In fanfiction he is not fleshed out, he always seemed to blush and say baka and be a boring character over all. While Alfred is this dumb himbo/bimbo character that can't put 2+2 and laughs at everything like a small child. He is 19, for fuck's sake.

He is still a child and people can mature up until 25-26. But these ages are not real ages. For example Germany is 20, even though Bismarck unites Germany in....1871 if I remember correctly? Don't quote me on that and the americans have freed them selves in 1776. So technically Germany as we know it, should be younger but isn't. And they're both still awkward babies. America doesn't have a concrete religion but from what I know, Christianity seems to the most popular religion there as for now. I don't know if Alfred (Even though he is fictional) would identify as a catholic, protestant, puritan or some other stuff but he is awkward, he has a boyish charm that Ludwig does not have. So I can't imagine these good bois being tops with experience. Usually tops/doms come with lots of experience behind their back, or at least this is what people say whom I know who are also part of the lgbtq and bdsm community. Alfred just doesn't have the vibe of a top, he is more of a switch to me, or at best a power bottom. Ludwig has a dom/top vibes but he is extremely awkward in all senses of the word. America doesn't have a concrete religion but from what I know, Christianity seems to the most popular religion there as for now. I don't know if Alfred (Even though he is fictional) would identify as a catholic, protestant, puritan or some other stuff but he is awkward, he has a boyish charm that Ludwig does not have.

So UsUk was forced down my throat ever since I can remember, I have been insulted, threatened and took 2-3 hiatuses purely due to bullying. I Really HATE, HATE, HATE - feminine Arthur. I do not know why this is the fandom's fetish, or at least used to be even though some fans still draw him that way. I really love art, I used to draw and still do. I went to classes through out almost all of my life and I know my proportions. Whether you look through normal fan art or hentai manga (Arthur has the most porn idk how or why) he always has these weird proportions.....of a malnorished tween girl. There is some porn of him either as a child (A toddler by the judgement of his body) or of Alfred as a child, and they fuck. How is this supposed to be hot for anybody? I also remember (Which is why I left amino) on amino that users were extremely childish and lied about their age. Like no, you're not 17 and a half and are ''too mature for your age'' you are 17 and that still is a minor in my book. Also in one of the translated hentai comics there is this...idk how to describe it, there is this shaving scene where Alfred becomes a man and has his first boner from what I remember, the artstyle is great, but the scene can be described a child grooming. England lies to America how boners are a horrible disease and it can only be cured if he stays next to him. He then goes to France who tells him that boners are healthy and normal at this age and is upset at England for lying to him. Then when he frees him self America smiles, laughs and pisses on top of England I think he later fucks him. Like people can try to force their weak argument over england being a uke somehow now, but Pirate England is a top, how in the hell would anyone think he is a bottom?

UsUkers also love weird fetishes and force them down your throat, and not only shame you when you don't ship the ship, they shame you when you don't have their fetish. So like people go to my dms and ask me if I want to MPREG with Arthur beign the ''woman'' in the relationships, and golden showers. I also remember leaders acting unprofessionaly towards me. Some user was sending me child porn and when I told one of the leaders they just told me it was my problem and to fuck off. It deeply upset me so I took a hiatus and when I returned I was just met with another shit wave. I think I left last year because some girl was harassing me and constantly wanted attention. I told her to leave me alone since I have lectures and can't speak to her right now and she told her friend I was ''mean'' to her and her friend started insulting me in every comment on every posted I posted, be it fan art or fanfiction I wrote. Also they can't roleplay properly. I feel like I am in 4th grade where children used to insult each other. Like what stupid (probably american white girl) thing going to tell me this time ? Hmmmm option A - Alfred says that Arthur has horrible teeth, option B - Alfred says that Arthur has horrible cooking, option C - asks for sex and wants to impregnate him even though they are both males, it seems to be quite jokes among them. I get that americans want to see their country as this buff, strong, brave, macho type, but real people have strengths and flaws. In my opinion no country is dumb, they all look after their personal interest and empires love to exploit others, it is just how it is. They basically use english stereotypes and call it a day.

Before leaving I went to another ''better'' amino where I blocked one of the leaders. I don't remember if their name was Alfie or something else but it was something like that. And another leader asked me to unblock her, mind you. I was hesitant but I did. I usually do not block people unless they share content that causes negative reaction out of me - panic attack/rise in adrenaline/shaking/desire to puke/anxiety/etc or they have been a total asshole/bitch to me in the past. So I don't have the screenshots, since I changed my phone a few months ago. I used a Lenovo one and now I have an old huawei I used to have since we don't have money for a new one. So I saved the screenshots where they started saying how Francis is a rapist and I thought we passed this phase. I told the original leader and they all seem to not speak english well but she told me that this leader thought I was mean. I mean...she joked about rape, am I supposed to text - XD LMAO YEAH THE R WORD IS FUCKING FUN, YEAH DUDE YEAH! XD LOL LMAO. From what I see, if I have explain his behavior, he just has a high libido, which is nothing to be ashamed about.

There are also different types of attraction - Aesthetic, Romantic, Sexual. And he appreciates anything beautiful. He also says that ''You can't force love on anyone'' and is generally a really sweet guy. Also from what I see he copes with his loneliness by having casual sex while Arthur copes by abusing alcohol. People cope with loneliness in different ways, for him LOVE is important and he craves intimacy. He is suggestive and says sex jokes which is relateable. He also has moments of walking around naked, and while that may be perverted, far more people have done more perverted things than him. Also Greece and Turkey have a lot more sex than France has ever had. I don't know if it is canon or fanon but I read somewhere that Greece loves sex without a condom since it excites him. France is perverted but so are many other people, if a person is assertive towards such personality he will respect the other person's wishes and not force the issue, because he understands the concept of boundaries. It seems that some fans are either too young or too stupid to understand what is common sense and boundaries. Some couples in real life suffer from mismatch in their libido which is why they go to a couple therapist and ask how they can revive their sex life.

He is not a creep. I have met old men stalking me around after school and I have had a guy at a bar putting something in my drink not knowing that I saw everything so I just left. Real creeps do not understand the concept of boundaries and the fact that people are not their sexual slaves, they crave power and dominance and love ruining people's lives, it doesn't matter who their target it, as long as they are depressed and on their knees crying and shaking in pain and fear. So yeah, rape is not something to laugh at but it seems the shitty girls that got into hetalia think it is peak comedy. With Antonio it is different, I do not like throwing the term - P*dophile around because that is a harsh accusiation but from what I remember from manga...didn't he try to steal North Italy who was a child...to marry him? He never wanted South Italy but got used to him at some point, so I am sorry for ruining all of the Spamano shippers's fantasies. He also raised him. Which brings me to the second point.

England raised America. Period. It is canon, it is in the manga, he found him as a child. England loves America because he is the first thing that did not hate him, for him. Europe in the past hated England, this is why France jokes that he is the - black sheep of Europe. He was abused by his brothers, especially Scotland and threw things at him and chased him away. Scotland is not only an abusive alcoholic though. He is more complex and loves his brother in his own way but historically England was not kind at all to Scotland. So these people were telling me that I am a wh*re because I don't ship their precious UsUk? Well guess what honey, England isn't a useless girly bottom, America is neither a top, nor a dumb guy and England most likely changed his diapers. Also why would America blow his revolution if he wanted to be free? I mean England taxed the hell out of him and was a bit of a narcissitic asshole, so why shouldn't America want to be free from tyrany?

Also for people who bring the - BUT FIORE, ENGLAND KILLED JEANNE'DARC SO THAT MEANS FRANCE SHOULD HATE HIM, YOU'RE A HYPOCRITE! - well hun, France held a grudge for centuries until he got even by helping America with Spain and Prussia to free him self from England's grasp. America was the only thing that didn't hate him because he didn't know him. He was an alone child and he finally had someone to take care of him and listen to him talk, that wasn't a human, that didn't die (Davie) and England is an introvert but he has many issues which is why to him the loss of America hurt so much. Because everyone else hated him, or at least in his mind it looked that way. Portugal was always his friend and in a rare case lover and France had a love/friend/hate relationship with him. People can make the argument that France took care of him but France was probably around 12 in human years and England looks to be around 10 when he wore that blue dress of his and when England had a bow and green cloak and shaggy long blonde hair. France still cuts off his hair to this day. While England was in his late teens 17-8 when he found America who was clearly around 5-6. Their pairing doesn't make sense from a psychological point. So I would love to not have any usuk shit in my feed. I have enough abusive people in my life who treat me like a punching bag, I don't need to get upset online too.

Alfred looks 5-6 years of age and believe it or not some children piss them selves even to the age of 10. Some have medical problems but that is not an issue for now. I have been a nanny. I have taken care of children of all ages, and they're telling me? That I should ship a ship where some guy changed another's diapers but the other guy grew up too quickly and now they are dating? IN WHAT WORLD, I REPEAT IN WHAT WORLD?Does that mean I should feel some sort of sexual attraction and would like to bang children I took care of, because they went to the gym and have what society conciders the perfect body? I guess in their mind I should. In reality somewhat every country is related to hetalia so the boundary between what is incest or not is vague. But even when usukers bring the - BUT THEY ARE NOT BLOOD RELATED? - so what, incest is still taboo and some say that since they don't have blood relation it is not incest, but this is why stepbro/sis memes are so prevelent. Since it is a taboo and taboos get some people excited sexually. Whether they are blood related or not is out of the question, Arthur did take care of him as a child.

This is not meant to cause the old FRUK VS USUK wars, but in my experience USUK fans are extremely harsh and cold, at least to anyone who doesn't ship their precious ship. It is like they can't stand anyone who simply objectivly says - I do not like this ship. Bruv, do you know how many other ships I don't like in other fandoms, and no one has given me shit or threatened to hack my computer and send people to beat me up, simply because I DON'T SHIP USUK? maaaan-Let's not forget that these hypocrites also spread lies and said that ''Himaruya said that UsUk is canon'' and there was this black and white fan art that rolled around Twitter, Facebook and other social media for a while and people believe it. I think Hetafacts or some other youtuber debunked that it was nothing but a pure lie. It should not matter what ship is canon, what should matter more is fans being civil and kind to another but no, let's insult other pairings and make people hate ships they didn't originally hate just because.

Here is another ship I don't like - Russia x China. Also another ship - Russia x Prussia, also another ship Russia x Lithuania, or Russia (Romantically) x Latvia, or Prussia x Liechtenstein (Romantically). I even met one person who shipped Sealand x England lol or England x Seychelles x France or Belarus x Liechtenstein (Romantically) I dislike all of these ships. Do you see the word hate anywhere? No, because I don't hate them? Do you know why? Well no one told me - ''I hope you die raped in shit'' and told me that I am ''r*tarded'' in my comment section on youtube because I said that I do not care about certain ships. You see I used to feel this way about UsUk too. It was meh, I don't care, I see them as father and son, because England literally raised him. Also England is proven to be a horrible neglectful father and a workholic and alcholic. This is the reason why Sealand is taken care of by Sweden and Finland.

I always saw him this way so I don't know how the new fandom just started seeing him as the gremlin that he is when he was always a fucking old grandpa gremlin, not a soft uwu useless femboy that loves sex and screams BAKA every 3 seconds and blushes for no apperent reason whatsoever. I have many things that I don't ship. For example I feel conflicted towards pairings like - China x Japan or Japan x America because the r*pe of nanking is a thing and Japan denies and while Japan may have attacked America, americans kinda rationalize the two bombs and laugh at it while if anyone mentions 9/11 they freak out. So they can joke about other countries's misfortune but if it theirs - NO,NO,NO! I think global issues should be adressed in hetalia and people should make vent/rant art. If you are an indigenous person and a white guy comes to you and asks why you wear normal clothes and he says that indigenous people only wear feathers and all, this is why we need to speak to children about racism. Or being told that being latino/a makes you ''Inferior'' somehow (IT DOESN'T), or you're black and you get told by a white person how you should go back to your home land ''with the bananas''. I can joke about my own country's problems but it feels extremely offensive if the country that did the crime (R*pe, destruction of religious monuments, statues of popular poets from my country, more r*pe, stealing boys and babies and forcing other religion on them so they can kill and r*pe their own mothers and sisters. )I do not blame their descendents for what their grandpas did to us, what I can't stand is the superiority complex they have and how they insult this country and speak in their own language like we don't understand them and pretend like nothing happened, which is why I hate a certain hetalia country with passion.

It really sucks how due to Covid the hate against asians has risen, I heard from my favourite youtubers how certain people harassed them and hurt them for ''spreading covid'' or something. Well this just horrible and we really need to re-think how we treat people who were not at fault for a fucking global pandemic. I don't know where Yao Wang would stand, since he is a fictional country but unless somebody projects their homophobia and xenophobia through roleplay or art and send me hate art, I don't really care who they are as long as their are respectful. I can't stand usuk, and I can't stand the fans. I try to block every account that has this content which sucks ass since they look like cool people but no, it has to be fucking ew ugh usuk they draw. I sometimes feel like a bitch for blocking them since they're not the same fans that have insulted, threatened and harassed me but I would like to not blow my chances and risk ever talking to them. If you want to, you can call me a hater, a basher or anything, I don't care.

In a way everyone in hetalia is related but lets say that I do not have concrete hate over this ship but the serial bullying I received from fans over the years. Which is why I ship things like Seychelles x Iceland or Hong Kong x Iceland and I can't choose. Usually when UsUk fans ''defend'' their ship they have two arguments - It is cute and - the revolutinary war and how much england missed him. Two people may look cute together but would their emotional maturity and personalities match? These are important questions, which is why for me Gerita personalitywise, matches but the emotional maturity gap is way too much. For UsUk America lacks basic emotional maturity, raises his tone, cuts off people when they speak, weird obsession about being a hero and a tiny bit of narcissism here and there, he overly trusts him self which can cause as much problems as someone who doubts them selves. England is in another place mentally is honestly much better off with anyone else that is not America or Canada. Portugal, Spain, France, Russia, Japan,etc. America also has more developed friendships with countries like Russia, France, Siciliy and probably Japan and Vietnam. I think he can date Lithuania for me their dynamic is so wholesome and pure and everything click together. Russia also works but some people are put off by it due to the cold war. RusAme/UkFr is much more than just love/hate relationship, I don't know why people have the impression that they constantly fight and make up. Normal couples don't do that. Whether it is incest or not it is debatealbe. I have seen dynamics like theirs and let tell you that these people always ended up divorced.

I will share some quotes from people on different social medias I have found that describe it better than me -

Quote number 1 - from fanpop

"USUK is actually one of my most hated anime pairings followed by Spamano a few places behind for the same reason. The thought of raising a child as a son/brother only to bang him when he's older is nothing but disgusting and makes England seem like a pedophile for "falling in love" with the child he adopted and raised. I honestly can't understand why so many people insist that America and England aren't brothers and that the pairing isn't incest when Himaruya, the anime director and characters in Hetalia have confirmed that America and England are indeed brothers. Some USUK fans claim that America's independence makes them non-siblings. That's just ridiculous. Even if America would say "I don't want to be your brother anymore" directly to England, it still won't make any difference and it certainly doesn't change the fact that America was adopted and raised by England. If the USUK fans want to ship this pairing, it's fine, but denying that the pairing is incest is just annoying. It makes it seem like they think incest is gross, but desperately try to deny that USUK is incest only to continue shipping it or to keep telling themselves that USUK will be canon, which will never happen just like (unfortunately) every other Hetalia pairing except (possibly) AusHun.''

Quote number 2- from deviant art

''t's this reasoning that made me think back to all the Journal reads, essays and editorials many of the Anti UsUk fans write about why they hate the pairing. They usually mention about the pairing being incest, pedophilia and/or not cannon. While all of those might be true, I think there's more reasoning to why UsUk usually never works. It isn't to say those shouldn't be mentioned, because they should be, and I will mention them. First off, incest. Yes, UsUk is incest, but not because they share blood, but because they're BROTHERS. The fact that England adopted America should not be anyone's excuse for why it's not considered incest. Incest means sexual relations between people classed as being too closely related to marry each other. The definition of related is belonging to the same family, group, or type. Neither of these say anything about sharing blood, or having to be born from the mother's womb. If your parents divorced, and your father married another woman, who becomes your mother, she would be considered related to you, since you both belong in the same family. America and England are brothers, they're family, they belong in the same family, and even share the same family name (Don't believe me? Britain's full name is United Kingdom of Great Britain, just like America's full name is United States of America, which was declared by Acts of Union in 1707 before the Revolutionary War. Coincidence? I think not 📷). No, I do not count their human names, since they're mainly names used for the fanbase to use. Now, for pedophilia, that's the one that can be questioned. On one hand, if England and America are shipped when both are adults, then it shouldn't be considered pedophilia. On the other hand, they are about 800-700 years apart. Though, the same could be said with America and other countries like Japan, Ukraine and Belarus. While America may not be the youngest country, technically speaking, he's certainly the youngest most powerful country. So, if anyone in the fandom is going to pair up America with anyone, male or female, that country is most likely going to be thousands of years older than him. So, do I consider UsUk pedophilia? Well... not if America is already a grown adult. So, unless there are fanart or fan fictions with England being sexual or flirty with kid or youth America, pedophilia isn't really the big issue (especially since I haven't seen pictures or fanart of England being sexual or flirty with kid America, and are perhaps the only brotherly pictures and/or fan fictions I can find of England and America). Being that everyone knows that UsUk is CERTAINLY not cannon, I want to go more deep into why I feel UsUk doesn't work. Let's set aside the fact that it is incest, and look at this pairing from a realistic standpoint. I want to start from the bottom up, which would be the back story of how England's and America's relationship started. Why is this relationship so memorable, and considered adorable? Why does it work so well? To put it simply, the relationship between England and America is very relatable. They both reminded me of my two brothers, and my dad and my uncle. It's the story of the little brother, who looked up to the older brother as the greatest thing on earth; the most perfect person in the world. He could never think of anyone else that could be compared to his older brother. Then, suddenly, that little brother grows up and realizes that his older brother is a compete jerk, or isn't as perfect as he originally thought. Usually, this is hard for any little brother to grasp, and, once he does, the relationship between him and his older brother starts to friction. They no longer share the same relationship they once had. Little brothers can relate to America in trying to grasp and understand that his older brother wasn't the big, perfect person he once thought, when he says, “you used to be so big.” At the same time, older brothers can relate to England in losing the innocent little brother that thought he was the world, then having to watch him grow up, and turn into a complete

jerk himself, or lose his innocence. It isn't that England never saw any flaws in America, even as a little kid, but it's hard for him to watch those innocence and naiveness suddenly flushed down the toilet. Now, America is surpassing England, and England now needs America to help him at times. From what I've seen from my brothers and uncle, it's very hard for an older brother to admit he needs his little brother's help, that there might be things his little brother knows more than him, and to actually call or go to little brother for help. This is continually seen with England and America during World War 2 where America volunteers to help, and England continually refuses, but yet seems to need the help (this is especially seen in the Blitz series). When anyone takes these two characters, whose relationship represents and older and younger brother of our generation, then turns it into a gay relationship, it completely ruins the amazing buildup that Hidekazu Himaruya was intentionally going for. It's not that gay relationships are not relatable, but the one that's made in the UsUk fandom isn't something that gay couples can relate to. Turning something that was never intended to be a gay relationship into one is actually the reason why there are gay men and women that dislike yaoi. It's not only a misrepresentation of England and America, and their relationship, but it's a misrepresentation of gay relationships in general. That's mainly where it boils down to why I dislike UsUk. Yes, homosexuality is one of those reasons, being that homosexuality was VERY looked down upon back during World War 2, especially during the colonial days (if you were caught in the act of homosexuality, you'd most likely be kicked out of the city and, if not, be beaten by countless cowboys, then killed, and those cowboys would get away with it, not being punished for said act even if they were caught). More than likely, England and America were homophobic back during those days, since many Americans and Englishmen were completely against homosexuality. It wasn't until around the Cold War, or during the 1960's, when the world started changing their viewpoints. Though, with that aside, UsUk, to me, just can't work with the back story and buildup of the show. Though, the same should be said for many yaoi fandoms in general. Many of them just don't work with the cannon buildup set for the two male characters. If people try to pair America and England up, keeping the cannon story line of their relationship, it comes out as unrealistic, and a misrepresentation of gay relationships, the relationship between England and America, and history in general. It isn't to say that nobody should write UsUk. In my opinion, whatever shipping you want to use is completely up to you. Though, if you want to write a UsUk fan fiction, it needs to not ruin the cannon relationship buildup set for England and America. In other words, I don't want a UsUk of any type to use the same cannon back story from the Hetalia series, otherwise it just becomes very unrelatable, and ruins the intended relationship buildup between England and America as older and younger brother. Anyways, those are my thoughts on UsUk, and why I don't like the pairing in general. You can agree or disagree, but I wanted to get my thoughts out. You can let me know in the comments about your thoughts on UsUk. I'm interested in knowing what your thoughts on the fandom, whether you're a UsUk fan or completely against the pairing, like me.''

23 - Have you ever had a ship become canon, but you didn’t like how it was portrayed?

- Korra x Asami (It looks rushed and I think Asami deserves better, in my eyes Korra constantly changed relationships and has immaturity issues, I watched the show a long time ago tho)

- Light x Misa (Misa deserved someone who cared for her)

- Erza x Jellal/Gerard (Erza deserved better, the guy looks like he is an extra or made of plastic)

- Ban x Elaine (I really dislike this ship, I read some articles about Japan and I do not know if this real/legit and please excuse me if I spread misinformation, but from what I read, some people said that Japan has p*dophilia problems. Certain mangaka or their word for the comic/manga artist, put loli characters on purpose to please a certain fanbase that likes this type of content. I look like a loli somewhat because I have small frame while other girls matured on body way too fast, I remained skin and bones up until the age of 19, after that I somehow started to gain some weight on my legs but that doesn't mean I am still not short and skinny on my upper body. Old creepy men, asking where you live and asking you sexual intimate questions when you just want to buy you self some dinner after school, isn't my idea of fun. Which is why - 100000 years but has the body of a loli is bullshit. There are older women who have smaller bodies but no matter how young you look, every human being starts developing wrinkles and hair falling at some point in their life. They may be small, but they surely don't look like lolis.

[dherzogblog]

songs/20

Happy Holidays Everyone! I started making these yearly playlists in 2001 as an attempt to connect with friends in the wake of 911. It was just before the dawn of ITunes, and way before social media. We were not in touch like we are today. I burned dozens of individual cd’s one at a time, printed up customized jewel case covers and snail mailed them all out. It was an annual month-long labor of love. Over the past few years, streaming music has made it much easier and faster to compile and distribute, and frankly much more fun. I still look forward to putting the playlist and blog together and sharing it with all of you. Particularly this year as it gives me a chance to connect with so many friends I haven’t seen in quite some time. It was a tremendously challenging year for all of us. I was grateful to have had my family here in LA the entire time, we remain healthy and well. The west coast Herzogs know just how lucky we have been. The next year will not be without its own challenges, but I'm hopeful we are able to move past this pandemic and the exhausting events of the past 4. More than that, I look forward to seeing each and every one of you in 2021. Until then, be safe, be well, and be good to one another. Enjoy the music.

ox peace, dh

Los Angeles CA. December 2020

Khruangbin - Time (You And I) Don’t ask me to pronounce the name of this eclectic trio from Texas, but this dubby disco tune had me returning to its chilled out groove often during the last few decidedly “un-chill” months. Dreamy and funky, the groove takes me back to NYC’s early 80′s club scene and Ze Records releases from the likes of Kid Creole and Coati Mundi.

Anderson .Paak- Lockdown Scenes from the front, June 2020

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Bill Withers (1938-2020)- Use Me The legendary Bill Withers left the playing field at the top of his game in the early 80′s, hardly heard from again. And while he didn't pass from Covid, his healing pop hymn Lean On Me seemed to be everywhere as people found music to help them cope with the challenges of the pandemic. Withers left behind a legendary and enduring group of hit songs that moved easily from soul to folk to pop, not to mention the subtle rolling funk of this one.

Black Pumas- Fire Strong debut from an unlikely Austin duo that garnerd both buzz and grammy nods. The critics are calling it “psychedelic soul”. Not quite sure that nails it, but like the artists coming up next, they’re carving out new ground while drawing inspiration from classic sources.

Gabe Lee- Babylon

Marcus King- Wildflowers and Wine

Charley Crockett- Welcome to Hard Times

Three artists that are literally changing the face of Country and Americana music. Soulful, authentic and diverse, reaching back for inspiration but always looking forward. If you like this sort of stuff they are all worth checking out. Each album is filled with quality songs.

Low Cut Connie_ Private Lives Philly’s Low Cut Connie are back at it with a double album that plays like the soundtrack to a boozy night at your favorite bar. Sweaty, funky and not a little bit messy. If Peter Wolf and Bruce had a kid it would be this blue eyed soul boy. Adam Weiner grew up in the shadow of the Jersey shore and can't help but have a bit of that E Street hustle.

Willie Nile- New York at Night One of New York’s beloved adopted  son’s dropped this love letter right into the jaws of a battered metropolis driven to its knees by the pandemic. It was heartbreaking to listen as the “city that never sleeps” came to a full stop. Somehow I still found myself coming back to it, imagining night’s ahead, when NYC is back on its feet and I’m roaming its streets. Looking for music, a beer, or maybe just a slice, and fueled by the irreplaceable energy and promise of the greatest city on earth.

The Long Ryders- Down to The Well Americana pioneers the Long Ryders reunited last year for a surprisingly solid album. This single sounds like it could have been recorded during their 80′s heyday featuring their trademark Byrds like jangle and harmonies, but the lyrics mark this song as unmistakably 2020.

The Speedways- Kisses Are History UK power pop outfit reach back to the the 60′s on this sweet slice of retro pop perfection.

Billie Joe Armstrong- That Thing You Do

In the early days of the pandemic we had all our kids (+ a significant other) at our house for a few months. It worked out great and we were luckier than most. The biggest issue was keeping enough food, weed and wine around.  There were some great nights with amazing meals, followed by gathering around the TV together. We re-watched The Sopranos, binged Billy On The Street, and revisited some of our favorite movies. One night we went back to a old family favorite, Tom Hanks’ underrated love letter to the one hit wonders of the post Beatles era, That Thing You Do!  I’ve seen the movie several times and it never fails to please. A true feel good film and a perfect Kodak snapshot capturing a simpler time in American pop culture. 

While we watch the unlikely chart topper’s The Oneders  fizzle as fast as they rose to fame, its not really the point. The movie is really an old fashioned love story. Playing like a perfect hit song you can listen to over and over, full of both hooks and heart. I always thought the title track, written by Fountains Of Wayne leader Adam Schlesinger  (who we lost to Covid), brilliantly captured the British Invasion sound every group wanted after The Beatles stormed America. Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong must agree. During the pandemic he cut an album’s worth of cool covers including a faithful version of this one.

Gerard Way (W/Judith Hill - Here Comes the End A tale of discovering music in 2020:  Heard this on a Netflix trailer for the series The Umbrella Factory. Turns out it is performed by Gerard Way (My Chemical Romance) who also writes the comic book the series is based on. (got all that?) He’s joined on this searing garage/psych rave up by the talented and versatile Judith Hill doing her best Merry Clayton.

Hinds- Spanish Bombs I’ve been following this Madrid based, all female outfit of punky garage rockers for a few years now. I think they are pretty great. This track, recorded for a Joe Strummer tribute bursts with an unbridled joy the stone faced and politically minded Clash could never muster. I bet Joe would love it though

The Secret Sisters- Hand Over My Heart Have enjoyed their harmonies for some time now. This one gives me vague Wilson Phillips vibes and I don’t really mind. 

Tame Impala- Breathe Deeper I know I’m supposed to like this guy, all the cool kids do, I’ve even seen the band at Coachella. Over the years very little of the music has stuck to me, but the pandemic offered a bit more free time to dig into this funky dubby, chilled out jam, and it stuck with me. Not to mention that 2020 was all about deep breaths.

Ledisi (feat.Corey Henry)- What Kind of Love Is That Ledisi is back with some slinky, sultry R&B and jazzy vocals

Dinner Party- FreezeTag An R&B/Jazz collective featuring Terrace Martin, Robert Glasper, 9th Wonder and Kamasi Washington use sweet soul on heartbreaking and all too familiar tale..

Toots and The Maytals- Time Tough  I’ve written an awful lot about my love for Reggae over the years. Right after Bob Marley kicked the door down for me, Toots showed me around the house. Ska, rock steady, and roots. He was true reggae royalty and sadly we lost him to Covid, just after he released what would be his last album. Check my Toots tribute blog and playlist.

Mungo’s Hi Fi- The Beat Goes SKA! These clever UK roots reggae collective never fail to surprise. This kitschy Sonny & Cher cover managed to make me smile every time I heard it. No mean feat in 2020

Stone Foundation (feat. Durand Jones)- Hold on To Love Frequent collaborators with Paul Weller  (he appears on a track on the album), Stone Foundation are back with another batch of their UK soul revival stylings. This one features Durand Jones ( of Durand Jones & The Indications) on vocals and some great reggae style horns at the top.

The Pretenders- You Can’t Hurt A Fool Can’t resist a good torch song, especially sung by the smokey voiced Chrissie Hynde. Was kind of shocked at how many good songs were on this album.

Shelby Lynne_ Don’t Even Believe in Love Sultry country soul and one of her strongest albums in awhile.

Jaime Wyatt- Neon Cross Outlaw country has a new bad girl. And in case you didn’t think she was serious, she enlisted producer Shooter Jennings (and his mom Jessi Colter on one track) to help make her point. 

Daniel Donato- Justice 25 year old guitar prodigy call his music “cosmic country”.  Ok, now I’m listening. You should be too.

The Jayhawks- This Forgotten Town 30 plus + after their debut this Twin Cities alt country group led by founding member Gary Louris continue to deliver. They find their inner Neil Young on this one.

Lucero- Time To Go Home God I wish I was in a bar right now listening to this, even if I might be crying in my beer.

John Prine (1946 -2020)- Lake Marie We lost so many this year, but this one really stung. A true American songwriting treasure, who was still making great music against all odds right up to his untimely passing. His songs are known for their simplicity, and economy of words. but this one goes against the grain. I’m still not exactly certain what it’s about. Sorrowful and haunting, yet somehow uplifting and redemptive. I heard him perform it live here in Los Angeles a just over a year ago and it has stuck in my head ever since. There is surely a place in heaven for the great John Prine.  He sang about it on his final studio album in 2018. Ironically it became the last song on his last record.

Thanks for making it this far....

***Play the entire songs/20 Spotify playlist HERE!***

[triforceangel13]

The Mark of Destiny Epilogue: Part 1 (A SidLink Au)

Epilogue: Part 1

Several months had passed since the day on the beach where Sidon had proposed. Many things went on in those coming months, setting their lives into happiness.

Linkle continued to grow with her child, her figure glowing with motherly love. Now that Ganondorf knew of her being his match and was with her child he was around much more often. At first it was awkward for everyone, Link having a hard time believing he was there to be with his sister and there to stay.

Eventually the two of them came to terms, Ganondorf had even stated how sorry he was that Link had ended up with his injury back then in the first place.

His sister and her baby would be in good hands whenever he or she moved out of the house or Ganondorf moved in with them.

Zelda moved out of the house to go live with Urbosa. It was a little sad, but they had been inseparable for ages but Link understood that this was something she needed to do.

It wasn't as if she had left forever and they would never see her again. Link saw her just as much as he used to seeing as Urbosa had work to still go to.

Sometimes she even brought little Riju with her who was one of the most precious little girls that Link had ever met.

Sidon had settled in nicely at their home, all of his things fitting in nicely as if they were right where they belonged and it was as if they were even closer than they were before. They talked about moving into another place but not till some time after their own wedding which they planned for every so often.

Link's dancing career was able to go back to normal, though he made it clear that he would only dance for his school rather than go cross country, much to his teacher's happiness. He never wanted to take the chance of having that kind of fight with Sidon ever again.

He also was happy where he was. Maybe it was a thought in the future but right now it wasn't in his cards.

Link was still her star pupil as well and had boosted him from student to full time dancer, even extending it to his sister after she had the baby and had settled into the new life of motherhood granted if she was willing to do so.

Sidon had even derided to join in as well after they had once again watched the piece they had danced together. He was in the beginning classes but Link was always there to help and Cyra always tended to make them dancing partners to help Sidon learn.

All was right with the world.

*

“What do you think Linkle?” Link asked as he stepped out of the dressing room in a black suit, a light blue tie sitting around his neck. He had some issues picking of what he wanted to wear to his own wedding. He couldn't decide if he wanted to wear a suit like he was wearing now or actually wear a dress as he sort of liked that idea.

Though with his sister he was able to deem that he should save a dress sort of thing for the honeymoon when it was in private. He was sure Sidon would love it.

“That looks amazing Link,” Linkle said with a smile on her face, though it looked as if it was forcing the smile on her face.

Something was wrong.

Link knew better than to try to pull it out of her though. Whenever you tried to force something out of her, like him, she bottled up.

“You sure picking the suit was still the right way to go?” Link asked as he looked at himself in the mirror, adjusting the tie that made his eyes pop like sapphire's.

“Link you could walk down the aisle naked and Sidon would still love the way you look,” Linkle said with a grin.

“You've got that right,” Link said with a laugh, ruffling his sister's hair and then looked at the tie in the mirror. “This a good tie?”

“Perfect, it matches you're eyes-ow...” she mumbled. Link quickly looked over at her, noting she was rubbing her stomach. He was about to ask what that was when she waved a hand at him.

“Indigestion.”

“Alright. I'll go get changed and then how about we go get some ice cream? It's been a long time since just the two of us have been out like this,” Link said, though the worry burned in his eyes. Linkle seemed very off. Something else was wrong.

“That sounds amazing right now,” she said rubbing her stomach for emphasis. Link laughed softly and went to get changed, the smile falling from his face once he was alone, pulling out his phone, texting Ganondorf.

“Something is wrong with Linkle,” he texted him. “She'll listen to you. Do you think you can convince her to go to the doctor or something?”

“On it,” was the reply he received by the time he had finished changing back into his regular clothes again.

Suit in hand he exited the dressing room, it folded nicely as his sister approached, a small pout on her lips.

“Something wrong?” he asked, taking the chance to ask her. She let out a small sigh, rubbing her stomach. “Ganondorf texted me...” she mumbled. “He asked how I was doing and you know I can't lie to him...and I shouldn't lie to you either. I haven't been feeling well since I got up this morning and recently I've been getting theses sharp pains...”

Link looked down at her and paled a bit. “Linkle, do you think you're in labor?”

“I-I don't know. I don't know what it feels like. I'm not really near my due date either,” she said worried. Link tensed a bit but took a deep breath. If there was one thing he had learned from his past experience he knew that he should always try to keep a level head about things and not go head first into something.

That's how he ended up in his situation.

“Breathe Linkle,” Link said softly. “You just text Ganondorf and I'll bring you to hospital alright? Everything is going to be fine.”

*

Link sat in the waiting room of the hospital, sitting in one of the empty chairs with his leg bouncing in anxiousness. Linkle was early compared to her due date and had apparently been in labor for quite some time.

After Link had shared some choice words with her about not speaking sooner about the pain that she had been feeling, the doctors whisked her away to see what they could do.

Link was still waiting for an answer, Ganondorf having taken over to be with her being the child's father.

Texts had been sent out to Sidon and Zelda first, wanting them to make sure they knew what was going on. Zelda had immediately answered saying she was on her way over but Link hadn't gotten an answer from his own match yet.

No answers like that still had him tensing up out of nervousness, thinking that something was wrong, that he had screwed up again. He had to keep reminding himself that it was going to be alright and if there was something wrong there wouldn't be any silent treatment. They would speak up if something was bothering either of them.

It was a promise they would both be keeping.

A warm tingle in his back had him shifting a bit. He never understood this thing. There wasn't much research on it but he was sure that it would signal of some things in their lives.

Like Sidon coming to him even without a word spoken.

“Everyone okay?” came his familiar voice. Link lifted his head and smiled softly. Sidon looked handsome as ever, dressed in a bathing suit and tank top, a towel hanging from around his neck which meant he had just been at work.

A small bouquet of flowers sat in his hands and something else that hid behind his back.

“I think so. I'm still waiting on an answer,” he said smiling from the chair as Sidon came closer and took a seat in front of him.

“I bought these for Linkle when she's made it through,” Sidon said, setting the flowers aside and pulled out a bag of fast food. “And this one is for you.”

Link laughed softly and took hold of the bag, leaning in close and kissing Sidon's lips. “Thank you. You always know what to do.”

“Well not all the time,” Sidon laughed, leaning in to give him another kiss.

“Oh jeez. Get a room you two. A baby is born, and you want to try to make a baby,” came Zelda's voice causing the two of them to pull away with red cheeks.

“Not without a miracle,” Sidon said with a small laugh.

“Is everything alright?” Zelda asked softly, the smiles and teasing gone from her face. “She wasn't due for another month or so.”

“They're still checking her out. Hope it won't be long till we get some answers,” Link sighed, settling back in his chair, his leg starting to bounce again.

Sidon caught his leg with his hands and pushed the bag of food onto him again. “Come on, eat up. It'll get your mind off of things.”

Link didn't fight it, immediately going to the bag to eat what was inside.

*

Waiting was the problem. Waiting was what drove Link crazy. Sidon and Zelda both tried to keep his mind off of it with conversation but it was hard. They both knew how concerned he was for his twin sister.

“Are you Link, Sidon, and Zelda,” came a voice causing Link to jerk out of his seat. The doctor smiled at them.

“How is she?” Sidon asked, resting his hands on Link's shoulders to help keep him calm. Link squeezed one of his hands, peering up at the doctor for his answer.

“She is doing just fine,” the doctor said. “She was early, but she was too far along in the labor that we had to deliver. But mother and baby are doing just fine.”

Link relaxed heavily into Sidon's arms who tightened his hands on his shoulders to help keep him upright.

“Can we see her?” Zelda asked which had the doctor nodding.

“She's asking for all of you. Follow me.”

The feeling in Link's legs came back quickly and he held Sidon's hand as he led the charge after the doctor to Linkle's nursing room.

She sat on the bed, a bundled blanket in her arms. Ganondorf sat next to her on the edge, his large arm around them both as he smiled down at the two of them.

“Hey,” Linkle said softly as she saw her family come in, a warm smile on her face. Her hair was a mess, looking as if she had been through hell but the smile was still there.

“How are you feeling?” Link asked softly, coming closer with the others as he looked to the baby. A small little baby sat cradled in her arms. Her hair was fire red like her father's, her skin a beautiful caramel.

“Meet little Reina everyone,” Linkle said softly, looking to her brother happily. “Did you want to hold her Link?”

Link nodded his head, his eyes widening as she carefully laid the baby in his arms. Link peered down at the little face. Her small eyes opened showing the same blue just like her mother but as well as himself.

“She's adorable,” he mumbled softly, rocking back and forth gently.

“Just like her mother,” Ganondorf added, kissing Linkle's head as she gave off a small laugh as she relaxed against him.

Sidon rest his hand against the small of Link's back, smiling down at the little bundle in his arms. “Hey Link?”

“Hm?”

“What do you say about adopting a baby in the future?” he asked curiously. “I think you would make a wonderful parent.”

Link's eyes widened at that and he smiled up at him. Zelda quickly approached, holding her hands out for the baby.

“My turn,” she cooed, taking the baby from him. Once the baby was out of Link's arms he grabbed the back of Sidon's head to pull him closer and kissed him.

“I would love to.”

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[purplesurveys]

918

Have a friends survey, because I’m really missing mine.

-- List 8 Friends of Either Gender --

1. Andrew 2. Jo 3. Aya 4. Gabie 5. Hannah 6. Angela 7. Laurice 8. Aliyah

Questions About These Friends

Does number 4 have a driver’s license? Yeah. I’m pretty sure we were part of the first few people in our high school batch who learned how to drive and get our licenses.

Can number 7 speak another language? Well yeah, she can speak Filipino. Everyone on the list can at least speak Filipino.

Does 2 know your parents well? Not so much. She knows the basic stuff about my parents that I tell everyone, like how my dad works abroad.

Have 3 and 5 been in the same room together? Multiple times, until Aya graduated. All three of us were in the same applicant batch in our org so we spent a loooot of time together.

Does 1 have similar music tastes to you? Broadly, yeah. I know we both like R&B and hip-hop but he’s faaaar more passionate about the genre and he’s a lot better at picking out artists and songs.

Has 6 ever stayed at your house? She’s visited a handful of times, but I prefer going to her house instead. I don’t really have a lot to offer here whereas we never run out of things to do at her place.

When did 3 last text you? If we are talking of strictly texts, November 2018. Aya was never a good replier on text lol. But my last notification of her in general was at 4 AM today, when she sent a meme to our friends’ group chat.

Does 5 have any pets? If so, what do they have? Nope. WELP I don’t know actually. She lives all the way in Bacolod so her home life doesn’t get raised much. I know she loves dogs though.

Does 7 live in the same town/city as you? Nah, she’s a south baby through and through.

Have you ever lent something important to 8? I’ve never even met her yet. We keep planning to especially since she works in Metro Manila now, but our schedules just never work out.

Can number 1 sing well? Yes. He’s done a lot of singing gigs and as far as I know he even put out an EP at one point. He has a sick stage name too.

Does 2 have any siblings? Nah, she’s an only child.

If 4 called you at 2 AM, what would your reaction be? Take it and assume she has trouble falling asleep.

Who is 8′s best friend? I’m not sure; I don’t know her all that well. I would assume it’s someone all the way in Mindanao, since that’s where she grew up and went to school and her whole life is there - she really only moved to Metro Manila for work. That’s why I feel for her sometimes and keep offering to meet up, so she can feel less lonely.

Does 6 have a favourite tv show? If so, what is it? She loooves watching TV series but I never knew what her favorite is. Good question, I’ll have to ask her this soon.

Who out of 5 and 7 knows you the best? I say they both know me on the same level but I think Laurice does slightly more. We’ve had deeper conversations, so it’s a safe guess.

Does 4 have a boyfriend/girlfriend? You are reading her answers right now. ;)

Does 2 have a career/knows what they want to be? Yes, she’s always wanted to be a journalist. She’s entering her senior year now and I’m really proud and super impressed with her for being able to keep up such a demanding, brutal passion; I was burned out from journ by freshman year. She even helps run a fact-checking website now :) It had just been a requirement in her class to come up with a fact-checking website but theirs got SO successful, racked up some awards, and now it’s still going.

Have you ever kissed 1? No. He’s like a brother to me and that just sounds like the weirdest scenario.

Does 3 have or want children? Yes. I know she wanted them when she was with Jo, but I’m not sure if she’s changed her mind lately.

Does 6 have any piercings or tattoos? Yep, on her ears.

Do your parents know 8? No. She’s an internet friend, so I never get to raise it in conversations. And I doubt they’ll be happy if they found out I made a friend on the interwebs anyway.

Which Number...

Have you had romantic feelings for? 4.

Have you told a secret to? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8. I’m pretty open with my secrets, as dumb as that sounds lol

Have you shared a bed with? 2, 3, 4, 6, 7.

Have you watched a movie with? I remember watching The Devil Wears Prada with 2 and 3. I’ve watched several movies with 4.

Have you seen cry? 2, 3, 4, 6.

Have seen you cry? 1, 4, 5. 5 hasn’t seen me cry but she has definitely heard me.

Have cooked you something? 6 and 7 :) They’re also the biggest mom friends on the list, so I’m not surprised.

Have a boyfriend/girlfriend? 1, 4, 6. I’m not sure if 2 and 3 are still together; we never get to update each other anymore. Have met your parents? 2, 3, 7 from a meeting we once held at my house. And 4 and 6, of course - they’re my mom’s favorites.

Have been to the same school/college as you? Everyone except 8.

About Number One What age are they? He turned 22 in June.

Have you met their parents? Never. He can’t give less of a shit about his dad so I don’t care for him, though. I know he’s super protective of his mom.

Have you ever been in a relationship with them? Not at all. He wouldn’t be my type, and like I said he’s a brother to me more than anything else.

Do they like most of your other friends? We mostly have mutual friends, so. I know he likes my best frieinds though - he was even the one who reminded me about putting Angela on my thesis acknowledgments.

How often do you two meet up and/or talk? Back in school we used to see each other around 1-2 days a week. He’s a little busier than I am since he takes side gigs, so he’s not in campus all the time.

When did you last argue? We’ve never fought but the last time I got quite upset with him was last December. We were rushing to get our thesis draft submitted on time and apparently he submitted the file to our professor’s VIBER. He for sure got an earful from me that day.

What is their favourite food? I’m not sure. He does tend to have unpopular food opinions so I wouldn’t be surprised if his favorite is not a common choice.

Where is their favourite place to be? On the basketball court or anywhere with Leigh, I’m guessing.

How many close friends do they have? I know of at least two - JM and Blanch. He is friendly and has an extensive circle though, so I’m sure I’m missing several other close friends of his.

Number Two What colour are their eyes? Dark brown.

Have they known you the longest? Not at all. I’ve only known her for three years.

Where were they born? I’m guessing it would either be Manila or Makati.

Why are they your number 2? She just fell on the second slot. I was trying to randomize my friends’ names and hers just turned out to be the second one I thought of.

Do they like children? I don’t know how she feels about them exactly but one thing I know is that she doesn’t hate kids, and we’ve had numerous conversations on what we’d do in certain scenarios involving kids. 

Would they beat you in a race? I think so. But then again I did track at one point, so I’m walking onto that contest already with an advantage.

When did you last spend time alone together? Ugh c’mon man, this question is just sad. Jo had been hanging out at Skywalk less and less ever since most of the people in our friend group graduated last school year, so our last real hangout was probably that time we slept over at Laurice’s in June 2019. We never hung out a lot after that, and of course the lockdown just killed any chances we had of doing so.

Do they have a pet peeve? What is it? She has a lot of pet peeves but I can’t place any of them at the moment.

Number Three What is their hair colour? Black, as do most Filipinos.

What is their job, if they have one? Last I heard she got a gig with a major broadcasting network. I think she’s a segment producer? Segment researcher? Something of the sort.

Do they have their own place? I don’t think so; not just yet.

How many brothers or sisters do they have? I know she has a sister. I’ve forgotten if she has a brother.

Have you ever done something illegal with them? Yes hahaha illegal in university terms, at least. When we had free time and we saw that no one was using one of the classrooms in the college, our friend group snuck inside and played The Devil Wears Prada on the projector. As the only goody-two-shoes in the group I was super uneasy the whole time, but literally no faculty or staff checked in on us for the entire film. That was the moment I knew I was no longer in private school, where everyone watched you like a hawk lol.

How old were you when you met each other? I was 19, she was 21.

Are they more sporty, arty or academic? ARTSY. She’s one of the best artists I’ve ever seen and she can absolutely fucking slay any editorial cartoon.

Have you ever travelled out of country with this person? Nope. I would love to.

Person Four Do they have a favourite musician? St. Vincent’s been her fave for the longest time.

Have you drank alcohol with this person? Many times. When I drink she’s usually around.

Are their parents together? Yes.

What do you enjoy doing with them? EATING OUT!!! I also love going to new places and museum strolling with her, but yeah nothing works for me better than food with my favorite person.

When is their birthday? June 5th.

Do they have long or short hair? Long.

Have you been to a concert with this person? Yes, when we went to (illegally) see Coldplay from the top of a parking lot. Still felt like we were part of the concert grounds though.

If you asked them to describe you, what do you think they would say? Determined, hates to lose, and annoyingly generous.

Person Five Where did you two meet? I met Hannah on our enrollment day for our sophomore year in college. She and Macy had transferred from UPLB to UPD and since Macy and I were already friends from high school, she introduced me to Hannah. Then we became a lot closer when it turned out we were both applying for the same org.

How long ago did they phone you? We both hate phone calls and we’d hate to call/be called.

Do they have a certain sport they play? I don’t think she’s very athletic herself, but she loves watching UAAP games and she has a particular affinity for volleyball.

What about them annoys you sometimes? I never found her annoying. I did notice that her one weakness as a co-worker is her fear of being assertive, putting her foot down, being confident to come up with her own steps on how to come up with steps towards a situation, that kind of stuff. She often wanted someone who she felt like was more knowledgeable to be by her side and make all the decisions. But I did see her bloom a bit after a few months, so I’m proud of the progress.

Are they ruled by their head or their heart? Heart.

Are they male or female? Female.

In what ways are they the opposite of you? She’s religious and she loves to sing and perform.

How many rooms do they have in their house? No clue; I’ve never been to her house. I’ve never even been to her city.

Person Six Can they play an instrument? I think she knows *a bit* of guitar. But she’s not crazy gifted when it comes to musical instruments, I know that much.

Are they close with their mother? VERY. And she has no reason not to be - her mom is the nicest and most compassionate person I’ve ever met. Always treated me like family.

Do you know any of their siblings well? She’s an only child.

How many times have you visited their house? Countless, especially in high school and in our first few years in college.

When did you last go out to eat together? Feb. It was one of the food stalls at The Palace and we needed to eat away all the alcohol lol.

Do they own a bike? I haven’t seen one in her place so I’m assuming no. Her neighborhood is not very bike-friendly to begin with, so it’s understandable.

Do they have a sweet, sour or salty tooth? She has a...green tooth? Hahahaha she likes eating healthily.

What music genre do they listen to most? Pop, pop rock, indie, indie rock.

Person Seven Would you ever consider dating this person? Probably not. She’s SO stable and happy; I’m still working on it. I wouldn’t want to dump my shit on her vibrant and bubbly outlook on life.

Do they prefer cats or dogs? Dog, I think. I don’t know for sure though. 

Are they or do they plan to go to college? To study what? Yes, she’s in her senior year now. She’s also taking up journalism – it’s how we met.

If they did something illegal, what would it be? I highly doubt that would ever happen lmao, she’s super nice and such a goody-two-shoes. If she got caught doing something illegal it’s 100% only because she was with someone who did the thing.

Have you ever shared a sundae with this person? Maybe once or twice.

is their hair dyed or natural? It’s all black now, but at one point she dyed it light brown.

Is this person sarcastic? She can be, especially with people she’s close to.

Is this person more likely to party or sit in and read a book? SIT IN AND READ A BOOK. Literally the most accurate option.

Person Eight Have you ever lied to this person? I probably have. We’ve only ever talked on social media, where it’s a lot easier to tell a tiny lie and get away with it.

Do you know where this person was born? Somewhere in Davao I’m assuming.

Do you know their middle name and do they know yours? We know each others’ second names because have them put out on Facebook; but not our middle names.

Do they have any special talents? If she does, I don’t know about them. She’s amazing at writing though.

What is their starsign? Whatever star sign falls on the first half of December.

What is the first thing you notice about this person? Ever since the time she tweeted that she doesn’t like smiling with her teeth, her smile has always been the first thing I’m drawn to. 

Have you ever had a big row with this person? Never.

Do you like the same types of movies as this person? Not really. We met because she was friends with my friends who liked the same things she did, but when it comes to us we couldn’t really be any more different.

Random Stuff

Which of these friends would you say you are the closest to? Gabie, of course.

Can you remember all of their birthdays? I’ll give it a shot. June 22, December 31, December 5, June 5, January 16, September 15, May 23...and Aliyah’s is in early December, I’m certain.

Is there anything you regret saying to any of them? I guess only towards Gab, because I’m closest with her and we’ve been through the most together.

Which one of these has been there for you the most? Angela.

Which one have you known the longest and the shortest amount of time? I’ve been aware of Gabie the longest (18 years); been friends with Angela the longest (15 years); and been friends with Andrew the shortest (about a year and a half).

If you needed a laugh, you'd call... I wouldn’t call my friends if I needed help...but if I needed a laugh I’d turn to Anj or Andrew.

If you needed advice, you'd call... Mmm I’d pick among Andrew, Aya, Gabie, Angela, and Laurice.

Which one does your parents like the most? ANGELAAAAAAAA. She’s That friend that I can name-drop when I’m asking for permission to go out, and once my mom hears that she’s going to be with me she usually won’t hesitate to say yes haha.

Is there any of these your parents dislike? They don’t dislike any of them but I have a feeling they’ll disapprove of the fact that I made an online friend in Aliyah, especially my mom.

Do any of them share the same initials? Andrew and Aliyah do.

You can invite one with you for a once in a lifetime trip, which one? Angela.

Something you'd like to say to one of them: I miss you. That applies to everyone.

[goldenworldsabound]

Star Tinted Confession

The moment you’ve all been waiting for...takes place after the Thanksgiving fics (1 ,2, 3). Philly and Wendy go stargazing.

Philly was pretty certain, after that little Thanksgiving episode, that she liked him back. She had to, right? When he thought about it rationally, he knew it had to be true. And thinking about being with her made him into the softest pile of goop he'd ever been, which would have been off-putting to him if he hadn't been so busy enjoying it. But as soon as he considered asking her out on a date, or making it clear in any way that his affections for her were romantic-

His heart pounded angrily and he felt like he'd puke.

But he also couldn't bare to go on the way they were going on, acting like nothing had happened, because something had happened, and now things were a little awkward between them-

He couldn't do it. But he couldn't make his feelings clear either.

He was paralyzed.

He often drove when he was stressed. It helped him relax and think. He found himself parking the car without realizing where he'd driven to. He furrowed his brow. This was...he jolted upright as he realized he'd driven himself to Wendy's place. He came here so frequently he was doing it without making a conscious decision. Great. He groaned, putting his head in his hands. Fine. Whatever. Maybe she was home. Was this weird? It was probably weird.

Despite these thoughts and the nervousness that was beginning to wrack his mind already, he forced himself to walk calmly over to her door. He held his closed fist up to the door, turning his face aside, grappling with whether or not to knock. He forced himself to relax his shoulders. He knocked.

The minute or two he waited was pure agony. What if she wasn't home? What if she didn't hear? What if she just didn't want to be bothered? Or worse, she saw it was him and decided not to open the door-

The door opened and he sucked in a quick breath.

"Oh! Philly! Hi!" She smiled at him, a hint of pink on her cheeks. Philly almost forgot to breathe, distracted by how beautiful she was, even just in a simple sweater and pants.

"H-hey." He replied, putting his hand on the back of his neck, the other sliding into his back pocket.

"Um...I don't think I was expecting you? O-or was I and I forgot?" She tapped her fingers together nervously.

"Oh, no, no, I didn't- I mean, I just kinda showed up." He smiled weakly.

"Oh, good, phew, thought I was losing it for a bit!" She laughed, but it sounded forced. "What's up?"

He panicked for a minute. Why was he here? Well, he wasn't ready to just jump in and ask her out, that was for sure. No way, he needed to warm up to that. Was he inviting himself into her home? That wasn't gonna work. He was certain she'd let him, but he'd feel like a Class A asshole for that one. Why didn't he think about this earlier?!

"I, uh...do you...wanna go for a ride?" He asked, blushing a little as he stared down at his feet.

"Oh! That sounds fun. Anywhere in particular?" She asked.

"Uh...not really. I mean, it'll be dark soon, so somewhere we can see the stars or somethin'. You know." Digging himself deeper into a lie by refusing to admit his unpreparedness, eh? Classic. He mentally berated himself. This sort of shit had always worked with hook ups. But here in the context of the girl he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, it felt hollow and like a train wreck waiting to happen.

She gasped. "Oh! That's a great idea! There's supposed to be a meteor shower tonight, actually." She put her hands over her mouth in excitement. "Did you eat dinner yet? We should go get some food for like, an impromptu picnic!"

"Look at that, you've already improved on my idea ten fold." He grinned, noticing the way with which she blushed at his simple compliment, averting her eyes.

"Don't flatter me, I just love eating." She waved him off. "Come in while I grab my jacket and stuff."

--------------------------------------

Once food was acquired and they headed out, they became quiet, the only sound the rumbling of the Cadillac as Philly cruised along the country road. Night had fallen quickly. Usually they had an unending list of things to discuss, or at least enough for a car ride. But the air felt thick between them tonight. As they left civilization, Philly broke the silence.

"Do you remember graduation?" He asked softly, certain that she did.

"You almost didn't walk." Wendy replied, eyes downcast to the hands in her lap. "I think it meant more to me than you."

"Heh. Yeah. That's probably true." He clenched the wheel for a moment.

"That was the last time I saw you." Wendy said, swallowing. "And I didn't get to say good bye."

"..." He glanced at her in the passenger seat. She looked sad. He hadn't realized she'd even noticed the way he'd taken off after the ceremony. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry-"

"I do, though. I didn't know how much it would mean to you. I was just- I was just a kid, and..." He winced, trees flashing past his vision as they meandered down the empty roads. "I wanted to congratulate you, I really did. But you were surrounded by friends, and family, hell, everyone was. But I...I had nobody."

They broke the tree line, and the stars came into view. Philly waited for Wendy to say something. He furrowed his brow as he heard a small sound. He glanced over and had to do a double take.

She had started crying.

"Aw fuck I didn't mean- I didn't mean to make you cry! Shit, lemme pull over," He pulled the car onto the shoulder, looking distressed. He unbuckled and leaned across to put a hand on her shoulder, staring at her with worry.

"I didn't realize- at the time I- I was just...so selfish, thinking about...how I felt...but not how it m-made you...feel..." She pressed her hands to her chest, a few sobs shaking loose.

"It's okay, Wendy." He leaned across the console to wrap his arms around her shoulders, pulling her to his chest. "You were just a kid too, you know. I never blamed you for being happy. For having people who cared about you."

She pressed her face to his chest, grabbing at his shirt. "Even so, I'm sorry." She pulled back, sniffling. "I wish I could've done more for you."

He took her hands. "You did enough." He rubbed his thumbs over the backs of her hands softly. "Shit, I didn't bring you out here to make you sad though." He released one of her hands, putting his hand on her cheek. "I'm glad I met you, you know. Especially here. And now." He smiled softly, heart pounding.

"I'm glad I met you too." She blushed under his gaze, averting her eyes. He blushed in response to her softly spoken words, the sincerity of them clear. The way her lips pouted slightly, parted as if she might speak, the pink spreading across her face. She was beautiful. Should he...? Was now the right time?

"Would you-" He felt cold, his heart beginning to pound even faster. She looked up at him. He felt locked into her blue eyes, still watery from crying earlier, the softness in her gaze making him catch his breath. Was that love? He panicked. "Would you like to eat, now? I can, uh, take the top down too, and all, so we can see the meteor shower better..."

The moment from before was broken. He slid his hands off her face and out of her hand, sitting back in his seat, fidgeting nervously, berating himself for chickening out. If not now, when? Well, certainly not now now. Sigh.

"Y-yeah, that sounds nice." She looked away, frowning a little. It made him nervous. Had he done something wrong?

"Great, I'll do that!" He set about his task, while Wendy laid the two takeout containers out on the backseat. The air felt heavy again, laden with the awkwardness of unspoken feelings. It was quiet again too, even worse now that the car was off. There was only the wind rustling the fields. With the top down, he grabbed a blanket out of the trunk, tossing it to Wendy as he joined her in the backseat. 

"It's gonna get cold as hell tonight." He commented. "Winter maybe isn't the best time for stargazing. Luckily I carry around a nice warm blanket."

She smiled, wrapping it over herself. She looked at him expectantly, picking up her food.

"You too, right? You've got so little body fat, you'll surely freeze."

He grinned, picking up his food and sliding under the blanket. She snuggled up against him as best as she could while still eating. His face warmed despite the cold air.

He put the food down, wrapping an arm around her. He put his face against the top of her head, feeling her soft hair against his skin, breathing in her scent. He was quickly becoming addicted to moments like these. A quiet intimacy of gentle, chaste touches. It was something he'd never known he'd wanted.

"Philly..." Wendy mumbled, pressing herself against his chest. She put her food down as well, pleasantly surprised by the contact. "Um, Philly, I-" She caught her breath, unable to continue. "Thanks for...taking me out to see the stars. And the meteors soon."

"S'no problem. Although, to be totally honest with you, I had no idea there was a meteor shower tonight." He chuckled, a deep throaty sound. "Asking you to come on a ride was a pretty last minute decision."

"Really?" She giggled a little. "Lucky timing for both of us then. What made you decide to do that, then?"

He pulled his face off her head, and she snuggled up against his chest further.

"Well, I...I wanted to see you. And before I knew it, I was at your door." He looked away. "I've been thinking a lot, since Thanksgiving. About the things I'm thankful for, and the things that I wouldn't want to lose." His breath caught in his throat again, but this time he continued after a moments pause. "You...mean so much to me, Wendy. I've been so scared to tell you, in case...in case you...don't feel the same but I...I want to be with you. Will you...be my girlfriend?"

"Yes." Wendy responded without hesitation, looking up at him teary eyes. "Yes a thousand times, Philly."

"R-really?!" His eyes widened, face brightening. "I- I'm so happy!" He wrapped both arms around her, squeezing gently and laughing. She laughed too.

"Look, look, the meteor shower!" Wendy noticed the streaks of light starting to cross the night sky. "It's beautiful." She stared at it for a long moment, before turning to look at him with a smile on her face.

She blushed upon finding him staring at her instead. "Yeah. It is beautiful." He put one of his hands on her cheek, staring into her eyes. He pressed his lips to hers and she returned the kiss. They pulled apart before snuggling up again in the blanket to watch the meteor shower. Despite the cold night, they had never felt warmer.

[scentedbygunpowder]

Royai Week, 2019 Day 1—Coincidence Word count: 1,876 Author: Katie/Ally (scentedbygunpowder) Rating: PG Summary: Under stress from being a living hostage for the homunculi and knowing that Pride could very well be watching her every move, Riza Hawkeye spends sometime in the marketplace crowds, hoping to feel less alone, and less afraid.

Coincidence

“Lieutenant?”

Riza looked up from her shopping in surprise and swiveled her head around, looking for the voice. It was only when she saw another woman responding, and smiling at another soldier that was nearby that she realized that her hopes had risen at the familiar word. The man’s tone wasn’t even that close to the one she wanted to hear. She must just be that desperate. She felt her heart fall a bit, before she steeled herself. How silly of her, to think she’d run into the Colonel out here.

No, she knew that neither she nor the Colonel could afford to be together right now. There were too many people watching them—too many eyes on them. She shuddered a little as she thought about Selim Bradley, Pride, watching her from the shadows. Those tendrils and little hands, and the eyes she could just feel. No. No matter how badly she wanted to see Roy Mustang, Riza knew that she shouldn’t hope. They couldn’t risk meeting outside of work. They could barely risk meeting at work.

There was a slight whine, at her side, and Riza looked down to see Hayate, whining a bit, then wagging his tail at her, as if he were trying to cheer her up. She smiled at her dog. He really was a good boy, trying to stay positive for her lately. She was certain he could sense how stressed and afraid she was. Riza readjusted the basket she had, reaching to pay the vendor for the fruits she had bought and then with a “Come on, boy,” turned to face the crowds again.

The market was often lively at this time of day, the crowds made up of both people coming home from work, and people heading out for a little fun. You could see all sorts, from the beleaguered mother trying to reign in her enthusiastic kids, to the couples walking hand in hand, to the people who were dead tired and just wanted to get home. Talking, shouting, playing and oftentimes music and singing could be heard breaking out there and there as people just interacted with each other. It really was a nice feel, and something that Riza had always enjoyed. She enjoyed it more now, because it made her feel at least a little more connected to the world, instead of just feeling like a hostage.

Riza turned to head home, walking along and enjoying the moment of life around her, enjoying just blending in, in civilian clothes for once. Her basket was weighty, full of vegetables and fruits, and ingredients for her to go home and fix herself a supper. But tonight she didn’t want to leave the market. She didn’t want to leave the life around her. She wanted to stay here, and not go back to her cold apartment where it felt like she could feel the shadows spying on her constantly.

A familiar and delicious smell caught her attention, the cooking of a little local street café that was one of her favorites. It was incredibly popular, and the chances of her getting a seat at it, at this time of night, was not very likely. But still, she was going to try. If nothing else, Riza could get herself something to carry home, and instead stop and eat it somewhere here in the market. The prospect was enticing, and she found herself moving just that little bit quicker towards the café.

It was, as expected, crowded and lively. The opposite corner had an impromptu band that seemed to have struck up, and everyone was clearly enjoying themselves. However, she was able to, surprisingly, find a seat at the café, and there was even enough room for Hayate to settle under her feet. The waitress came, took her order and left again, leaving Riza to her thoughts and observations.

For a while, she didn’t think about anything in particular, just letting herself observe the atmosphere around her. She could pretend, even for a moment, that things were normal, that she wasn’t under all the pressure she was, that there wasn’t a grand conspiracy at the highest levels of the government, that her team (friends, family) weren’t scattered around the country, their lives in danger. For a moment, she could pretend that things were as they were supposed to be.

“Excuse me? Ma’am?”

Riza was brought out her reverie by the voice of the waitress, and looked up at the girl. “Yes?” she responded.

“Well, as you can see, we’re pretty busy tonight, and it’s crowded. If you’re alone, would you mind sharing your table with other customers?” The waitress bit her lip a bit, her fingers linking together as she asked.

The poor thing was nervous, and Riza smiled at her, trying to put her at ease. “Of course,” she said. “I don’t mind at all.”

The waitress let out a breath, and her eyes seemed to lighten a bit. “Thank you very much, ma’am. I really appreciate it!” Much lighter then she came, the waitress dashed off, and Riza smiled, returning herself to her observations.

“Lieutenant?”

Her heart stopped, her eyes widened as she heard that voice, and she turned to look. Standing next to her table, a beautiful woman on his arm, was Roy Mustang.

“Colonel!” she said in surprise, making to stand before he motioned her back down. “We’re not in the office, Lieutenant, and off duty. Don’t worry about it.”

“Of course, sir.” She replied, looking curiously between him and the woman.

“Oh dear—oh—is this going to be a problem?” The nervous waitress asked.

For a moment their eyes met, and it was the connection that Riza had been missing.

“No, not at all,” he said, smiling at the waitress. “She’s a work friend,” he explained. “I’m sure that Veronica won’t mind, will you?”

The girl on his arm giggled, and Riza tried to categorize her name. Ah, yes. Veronica. One of his sisters. She felt herself relax a bit. Nothing to worry about then.

“No, not at all! I want to meet more of your friends, Roy!” Veronica said.

The waitress looked relieved, and left to go bring them some drinks, while Roy pulled out a chair for Veronica and then sat down himself.

“I didn’t expect to see you here, sir,” Riza commented. “Especially not on a date.”

“Well, Veronica wanted to go shopping, and then I told her about this place. After all, I do believe it was you who recommended it to me before.” He said.

“Oh did you?” Veronica asked. “How did you find it?”

“It was recommended to me by a friend. She had eaten here before when she was in the city. I believe it was on a date. The date was abysmal, if I remember correctly, but she said that the food was divine.” She watched Roy almost choke on the water he had just been brought. “I can’t speak for her date, but she was right about the food.”

Veronica giggled again. “Your friend sounds like a fun time!”

“If its Catalina, she is,” Roy muttered with a slight scowl.

Riza turned a placid smile on him. “As a matter of fact, it was. You can’t deny that she was right about the food here, though, Colonel.”

“No, that’s true,” he admitted, settling an arm around Veronica. Riza tried not to let her eyes linger on it too long. “So what brings you here, Lieutenant?”

“Hayate and I were out shopping. But to be honest I was tired, and didn’t want to make supper tonight. I could smell the food from here, and decided to stop.” She explained, picking up her own water.

“Hayate?” Veronica asked.

“Yes. My dog,” Riza explained. “Hayate, come.” She said. The dog stood obediently and Veronica immediately began cooing over the dog. Hayate didn’t move until he received Riza’s command that let him go see the other woman, who immediately began showering the pup with attention, much to his delight.

“It seems working for the Fuhrer is hard,” Roy said, raising his eyebrows.

Riza could hear the unspoken question in there. Are you alright?

“It keeps me busy, but I’ve been busier,” she responded. I’m alright.

“Still, I’m surprised to see you out. I know he keeps you late often.” Is everything alright? Are you being followed? Watched?

“He does, but tonight he let me go early, and decided it would be nice to spend some time among other people.” Yes I am. I needed to be around people tonight.

The Colonel’s eyebrow raised slightly. “I see. You should spent some time with some friends then, Lieutenant. Go have some fun.” Remember that if it gets too much, you have allies here.

“I wouldn’t want to bother them, sir. Not when I’m sure they’re just as tired as I am.” I don’t want to drag them into this unless it’s absolutely necessary. It’s too dangerous.

“I trust you know what you’re doing, Lieutenant. Although I still think you should loosen up and have a little fun. Hey, Veronica! Don’t you know someone that would be good for the Lieutenant here?” Please be careful. Remember your contacts. Let’s get one in touch with you.

“Hm?” Veronica looked up from Hayate, blinking as if she hadn’t heard the conversation, then lighting up as the last question registered. “Ohhh, I bet Gerrard would be good for her! Or maybe, if you like them more exotic, Miss Lieutenant, Jean-Luc. He’s an experienced one!”

Veronica chattered on about the different men she could set Riza up with—different contacts, they all knew—and they talked amicably about such things for a bit, only stopping when the food had arrived, and they all dug in. It was, as usual, delicious, and Veronica declared that it was to die for. It wasn’t long after that, that they all stood to leave, Veronica once again on Roy’s arm.

“Well, our date night has just begun,” Mustang said, “And there’s plenty more to do. But I trust I’ll see you around tomorrow, Lieutenant?” We have more information to gather. Will you be okay?

“Then I hope you have a good time,” she said, looping Hayate’s leash around her wrist and picking up her basket. “I’m sure we’ll at least see each other in passing.” Good luck. I’ll be alright.

“Then have a good night, Lieutenant.” Roy said, a slight tip of his hat to her. Be safe.

“Bye, Riza!” Veronica called back as the two began to walk away. “I’ll see about setting you up with someone! I’ll send the details with Roy here!” I’ll set you up a contact too. And give you a reason to talk to Roy.

Riza laughed. “I’ll look forward to it. Thank you.” Thank you for giving me a reason to talk to him.

She watched them walk away for a moment, settling her basket on her arm a little better before she too sat out for home. Her heart felt lighter, and her steps more sure as she walked, Hayate trotting by her side. Perhaps it was just foolishness, but this was just the coincidence that she needed tonight.

[finn0]

All the houses I’ve lived in

1. 94 Queens Rd, New Lambton, NSW

My parents current house since 1989 and the house I’ve had sex with the most people in. A regular two storey house opposite bush on a nice street with neighbours that don’t talk to you (perfect). 3 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms with air con, a big fireplace, pool and massive garage. Lovely, but I don’t expect to inherit it so the attachment must remain minimal.

2. 11 Cobb Ct, Annandale, QLD

Okay formative toddler years were spent here. A tropical style bungalow with the lowest ceilings you’ve ever seen and even lower hanging ceiling fans (take off your shirt with caution). A massive pool constantly populated with cane toads year round that saturated the yard with chlorine every time a cyclone blew through. More floor space than is necessary for anyone. Horrible, angry neighbours that hated children. Short walk to shops, no air con despite Townsville being the armpit of the country. I spent almost all of time sitting on a Big Bird beanbag watching Sesame Street and screaming in abject terror every time there was a toad sitting in the toilet bowl (which was worryingly frequent).

3. 27 Woodrose Cres, Sinnamon Park, QLD

Literally the ugliest house I’ve ever seen in my life. Gaudy, over-tiled, far too big for any family, nothing but white tiles everywhere and not a tree, nor plant, nor weed in the backyard, just grass the colour of hay. Who in Brisbane requires an attic? Who requires THAT many bedrooms? What the FUCK is that suburb name? This house we thankfully lived in for no more than 7 months but good God what a relief.

4. 45 Clarence Rd, Waratah, NSW

My grandmother Bessie’s house. We lived there for a year while I was in pre-school and while my parents house was being renovated. Absolutely fascinating house that each grandchild loved to visit. The most bizarre things were to be found there. First of all it was a regular 2 bedroom home with gaudy wallpaper and a 1950′s kitchen and bathroom, plenty of living space etc. BUT the bizarre flat that was downstairs under the house that was built for my great-grandmother to inhabit was like stepping a 1950′s motel room. Pea green bathroom, pink kitchen, rising damp, mouldy wallpaper, dust upon dust upon bugs upon discarded venetian blinds. Oh my goodness it was amazing down there. It smelled like a nursing home. PLUS under the house was this enormous space all covered in dirt and other crap and trinkets and sheets. ZERO light penetrated this space and therefore was the best place to crawl around and get spooked. The laundry, also under the house, had high ceilings that were stained a Jackson Pollock amount of colours from years of laundry and rising damp and rain leaks AND leading from under the cupboards in the kitchen upstairs was a laundry chute that led all the way down to the laundry WHICH smaller grandchildren could actually fit into and snake their way down to avoid the prying eyes of older cousins during games of hide and seek. Until you were too big to fit. Like I found out one day. Not an easy search and rescue mission, I’ll tell you that. OH AND the back bedroom had some creepy as shit naked dolls with no hair and meth eyes that rolled back in their head along with like strange 60′s childrens paraphenalia and tiny trinkets that I later found out were things like ACTUAL jewels from Scotland and vintage broken Rolex watches. Also I remember sleeping in that room in my mothers childhood single bed while she slept next to me in another, while my father slept next to my grandmother in a separate single bed in her room (why??). Later after she died, new owners bought the place and my mother met them after a few years and asked if they thought the place was haunted to which they replied an unequivocal “YES”, my mother then asked if they left dishes out in the sink of a night, to which they replied “.....yes” and Mum was like “Well that’s the culprit, my mother would NEVER allow that” and the look of understanding coupled with genuine fear cements the fact that my grandmother was and is a motherfucking force to be reckoned with, alive or dead.

5. 7/58 High St, Randwick, NSW

I moved to Sydney! Why? I don’t know! My partner was doing a degree at UNSW and I went with him because I was 21 and couldn’t stand my parents any longer so I buggered off. Now. This apartment was a second floor walk-up in a WW1 era building opposite a hospital and BEHIND a Coles loading dock. Plus there was a screaming autistic Arabian child downstairs and the loudest dog you’ve ever heard next door. Serene. Peaceful. Damaging to the psyche. We lived with my partners brother which was fine, but that place not only had no heating nor ceiling fans it also had no flyscreens. I didn’t even have my own set of keys. I shared ONE set of keys with my partner for two years. Fucking ridiculous. Yes, the food nearby was good. Yes, I commuted back to Newcastle most weekends to keep my casual job. Yes the neighbours were fascinating, ranging from the American guy across the way who never ever closed his bathroom window and gave me many shows of his frankly monstrous penis, to the chainsmoking nurse below who had a permanent frown despite living across the street from her work, to the Koreans downstairs who constantly cooked delicious barbecue while pretending to not speak English, to the gorgeous gay couple who lived above us who could add a new synonym to the dictionary to define “unfriendly”. We got out just before the new light rail was to begin construction right outside our building, but regardless, because of all the noise that surrounded that place before that, I now can sleep through the sound of a fucking jet engine roaring right next to my face.

6. 145 Wilson St, Carrington, NSW

Back to Newy! Okay so this was the first house we even Googled when looking for a new place back in Newcastle, and weirdly, we got it!. It was a tiny cottage in a harbourside suburb that was across the the street from wheat silos that are literally the size of Windsor castle. The day we moved in, a representative of the Port Authority knocked on our door and told us that if we ever heard a particular siren, that it meant the silos were on fire and an explosion was imminent and that we would have about 10 minutes to evacuate before half the city was Hiroshima-ed. Lovely welcome. We heard that siren (or a siren at least) about 50 times in the 2 years we were there. Pretty alarming, as it were. Anyway, the house was literally 3 rooms and a kitchen, 2 tiny cubicle afterthought bathrooms, and a nice big back deck. Now I was happy there, it had everything I needed, it was pleasant. I had a good garden going and I really learned to cook there. Carrington is where my family is originally from, and it was easy to walk everywhere and I loved the history of it. However, our landlord was a Chinese lady called Winnie who could not have misunderstood the concept of landlord responsibilities less. Any repairs or things we needed, she was not just unavailable but actively apathetic. It was like pulling teeth to get her to even communicate to the property manager in even basic English in regards to anything we required. Our neighbours on one side were a lovely couple with 2 babies but they had a dog called Trippi that would bark whenever someone in the opposite hemisphere coughed, and on the other side were a couple in their 70′s who were both suffering dementia, constantly screaming at each other and who also had two elderly dogs that would bark whenever someone nearby inhaled. For two years I heard literally nothing except Matt’s piano, Trippi barking, the other dogs barking, the neighbours angrily SCREAMING at one another, wheat silo alarms, screeching train tracks and coal tankers blasting their horns as they entered the harbour. Again, seasoned professional, can sleep through anything.

7. 46 Garden Grove Pde, Adamstown Heights, NSW

Alright, so two friends of mine, also a couple, were living in a tiny half house situation and also wanted out of their place, so we decided to all move in together, into a place that was much larger and that we could all collectively afford. So we found this lovely large house with 4+ bedrooms so that we could all have our own space and get on rather well. And it worked out! My partner and I had a great big bedroom, Matt had his own study, we had a library, a music room, and my friends had an enormous bedroom downstairs plus a huge bathroom/laundry AND there was 3 tiers of yard that we grew all sorts of vegetables in, plus it had a driveway that looped around (I would call it a plantation driveway?) so heaps of space for everyone. It was great, plenty of space for guests which we had a lot of, plenty of outdoor areas for entertaining, it was wonderful. But unfortunately my friends relationship ended and an old friend took one of their places for a year (also fine) but eventually it turned out that the place was getting sold and after literally months of surprise inspections and open houses we’d all had enough and decided to move out separately. Now this so far has been my favourite place. It was 10 minutes to work, everyone had their own space and we lived, I think, pretty well harmoniously together. But nothing good lasts so now...!\

8. *** Kings Rd, New Lambton, NSW

From Queens Rd to Kings Rd! We found a gorgeous house right near a train station that I am currently in and pretty happy with. For the first time I have ceiling fans again plus air con and FOUR bedrooms that I barely know what to do with. Currently I’m sitting in my study surrounded by all my books with the fan on typing this out and it feels good to have my own space for a change and actually have trouble furnishing a house as opposed to making concessions about what I keep and what I can’t. I’ve planted a veggie garden, I have my kitchen the way I want, and the house has been renovated, re-carpeted, painted and made livable for a modern couple. We have spare space for guests (or a spare room for me when I don’t want to wake up Matt when I go to bed at 3am, but that’s the sleep pattern of a shift worker) and overall I feel good about it. Finally. I’ve been looking for a good home to just COME HOME to for ages and for a long time I haven’t really felt that. My last home was lovely, but honestly 3 tiers of gardens to maintain and roommates (though they remain dear friends) are just not what I want to deal with anymore. Actually not even that, I’d be fine with roommates, but it’s just nice to feel like I have MY house and it’s mine to come home to.

Anyway, apologies for this long post, and I know barely anyone will read it, but I started this blog TEN years ago so and I don’t have a print journal to write all of this stuff in, so I might as well talk here. HOUSES! If they’re not haunted, then where’s the drama we so desperately crave?

[gotatext]

claws my way out of the dirt like the goblin i am ..... hello thots, its nora, once again bringing you a revamped version of a muse i played yonks ago n some of u may have even written against... here is her pinterest.....

this is margaret greta, she’s a whole can of trauma spaghetti plastered over with a toothy grin and a lot of dad jokes. the only reason she’s in gifford really is bcos shes been put there as part of a witness protection program cos lots of police r monitoring livingstone so its deemed relatively safe.... haha... anyway she changes major all the time. she started off doing fine art but since then she’s done modules in architecture, film, bio-chemistry and is now dabbling in medicine. 

CIS-FEMALE — ever hear people say GRETA O’DRISCOLL looks a lot like DIANA SILVERS? I think SHE is about 21, so it doesn’t really work. The MEDICINE major is a SOPHOMORE that is from DEADWOOD, SOUTH DAKOTA. They can be +CHARMING, but they can also be -EVASIVE. I think GEE might be SHEEP. They are living in YATES. ( nora. 23. gmt. she/her )

this bitch is the most restless creature u ever seen. before she came to livingstone, she’d lived in 8 different cities in 3 years. 

was adopted as an infant. had two foster moms and two older sisters so always surrounded by women. lived in a boarding house, very much like the one in 20th century women, with lodgers coming in and out all the time, mostly artsy young women because her gay moms were both high school teachers trying to set up their own arts collective. one of her moms left when she was 4, n she doesn’t really remember her.

while living with entirely women made her super into catlin moran and the guilty feminist, as a teenager she often let boys walk all over her bc she just craved male attention jst bcos she’d never really experienced it. saw it as something aspirational, like sitting in the back of chad’s second-hand truck while he drove you to macdonalds and offered you and his five friends with identical haircuts weed was the height of being cool to greta, she wanted to be their dream girl, even if it meant compromising her beliefs

bubbly bitch but also massive snake. metaphorically and literally, always shedding her skin. loyal to few, ruled by none, out for herself, babey!! every place she goes, she becomes a new character, someone who’s a figment of her imagination, as if each city is repertory theatre and she’s a character actress, so as a result som ppl think she’s called rita, some ppl know her as margot, she just flicks through identities like nobodies business.

goes through phases of being intensely feminist and tweeting “men are trash i don’t need them” before flipping into being lonely and needy n wanting male attention again. tends to gravitate towards men who are just pieces of shit tbh like her friends are always like hun.... pick a nice boy..... but no.... she’ll go for the boxer with several arrest records for gbh or the small-town drug dealer just trying to hook her onto pills for a little extra cash, or the reformed sinner who thinks he’s being protective by reading all her texts and always knowing where she is..... n she always finds a way to spin it so that they Just Care About Her and aren’t a p.o.s 

left school at 18 n didn’t go to uni, moved in w her boyfriend of the time instead, but soon got bored, n then went backpacking around the states making money in the casinos by being a shot girl (yeehaw) and trying to make it as a mysterious 1920s widow with a smoky voice, a dark secret n a heart of gold, looking for love in the big city. all she found was producers and acting agents who’d promise her stardom n actually just fuck her in a motel n then ignore her calls.

TW domestic violence, TW gun, her watershed moment came when she met luke in sioux falls while she was playing bass for a country n blues band. he was a few years older and had a car, and they kind of went from seeing each other to being that super intense couple who are just necking all the time. 

they got engaged like 3 months after they met n rented a flat together, much to her family’s annoyance but she was 19 so there wasn’t much they could do. their relationship was super super intense though, often really heightened and when they fought it could become quite violent, but she’d pass it off as just him being really passionate. 

one of their fights got really heated and greta threatened him with the gun he kept in the glove box of his vauxhall corsa, but the safety was off and she accidentally shot him. she pleaded self defence in the trial n cos of the amount of times she’d been hospitalised for various concussions n things like ‘fallling down the stairs’ the police were like yea... pretty watertight evidence that he was a bastard who [chicago voice] had it coming..... also this happened in 2017, he was mixed race and greta is white so naturally the police totally took her side. she’s now under witness protection, rehoused in livingstone as a sports-scholarship student, due to the amount of police involvement in the area, it would mean should one of luke’s family members try to track her down, she’d be relatively safe

 massive sports fanatic. plays tennis. on the cheer team. was a track superstar in her high school. honestly just that sporty bitch, you’ll see her doing lines at a party at half four and then on your way to your 9am lecture you see her running across the park like a fresh fucking daisy who is this bitch

pretty easy to get along with (provided you don’t anger, provoke or question her too much) because she WANTS your character to be enthralled by her and will do whatever it takes to win them over. she wants everyone to love her

is That Girl who always knows where the parties are, and is always there, on the sofa, talking about institutionalised racism and trying to coerce you into a game of beer pong that she’ll definitely win. doesn’t really have one solid group of friends, just kind of on good terms with everyone and social butterflies about

has changed her major so many times. decision? who is she. currently studying medicine, but doesn’t rlly enjoy it. she’s very unmotivated and lazy and probably wouldn’t ahve bothered going to uni if she hadn’t been placed in one by a witness protection program. will probably change on to history or gender studies soon n just make up the extra credits by volunteering

 massive feminist. low key quite scared of powerful men bcos of her ex. wants to start a female only lesbian commune bc she misses her childhood in a south dakota boarding house and has endless support for women. honestly annoyed that she is attracted to men, would so be 100% gay if it was a choice. cuffs her jeans and can’t drive. is That bisexual. skateboards. wears backwards caps.  i hate her

plays bass guitar, has a teal green fender and it is her BABY. it’s covered in stickers about saving the planet and ending fracking and going vegan. she’s in an all-female punk band w agnes (n mayb jade i think) n they play gigs every now n then in grotty club basements full of druggy sweaty college kids

PERSONALITY: easy-going, sociable, observant, blunt, amiable, nihilistic, self-serving, laid back, independent, unmotivated, charming, lazy, impulsive, alluring. ESTP and a leo

LIKES: art, music, john wayne movies, black mirror, philosophy,  cowboy chic culture, DC comics, arcade games, candyfloss, deep red lipstick, marijuana, dogs, karaoke, Kate Moss, late-night strolls, zip-lining, chemistry, suspenders, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, cold coffee, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, boiler house DJ sets, magnolias, decorative lamps, worn-out furniture, twangy electric guitars.

DISLIKES: bananas, coffee, Woody Allen, mental mathematics, children, Trump, institutionalised misogyny, the imaginary future, french literature, Wes Anderson films, spoken word poetry, the general mentality of cheerleading squads (despite being on one)

aesthetics:

a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, mom jeans, a beaten up pair of adidas, denim jackets, strawberry laces, knee-highs, chapped lips, peeling sticky plasters, split knuckles, bruises you try to cover with concealer, stick and poke tattoos, hot coffee, sleep caught in your eyes on a lazy afternoon, kissing girls, cigarette smoke shrouding you like a veil, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, leonine arch of your back and that stellar smile that says ‘you have no idea who you’re dealing with’, a rucksack permanently packed for the move, a streak of red across your lips, roller blades, cut knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, and piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your mom wouldn’t take you, kate moss posters lining the walls of a teenage bedroom, his name scrawled in rage across the pages of a diary, thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, a tennis racket you punched through in a fit of temper, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes. 

wanted plots: since greta literally can’t differentiate between romantic and platonic love, she’s got off with so many of her mates, so i want awkward friendships where they nearly dated, or exes that have now just turned into weird friendships, and girls from the cheer team who she’s like, weirdly intimate with like the shower together but its not a Thing cos the other girls straight, and I want like, fellow medicine students who are like?? how is this bitch still passing?? i swear she goes out every night?? she works part time at a fast food restaurant, i want a mate that just goes and sits in there talking to her until her manager gets angry. ppl she did a few modules with before changing course and somehow sort of remaining in touch with, like she did a few art modules, a bit of film, n some architecture before switching to medicine, though she’ll probs switch course again soon. ppl who she runs track with. someone she’s trying to make a zine with. here’s a list of plots on her old blog if u want any of them w her.

would love plots of any type, throw them all at me please, i cnt wait to interact w all of u. like this if u want me to message you about connections / plots! xo

full biography if u can be bothered

trigger warnings: drugs, domestic abuse, gun.

you never meant for it to happen. you’d heard the stories, of girls who let their man walk all over them, and thought to yourself “i’ll never be one of those girls…” the kind that eat low-fat yoghurt and drink slim fast to shred a few extra pounds because he said she was getting round in the tummy, or the ones who spent their evenings tied to a kitchen sink drinking wine while him and the boys played poker, wishing god, if only I could get out of here. not you, not you raised by strong women, four bright shining beacons. single mother with her hard-as-nails attitude and her stony glares, elder sisters (twins) one ginger, one blonde, one doctor, one lawyer, both determined to take a bullet to the brain and a hammer to the patriarchy before they let a man touch them without asking. you were always so inferior, so insecure and small, like a bird (like a sparrow) with blonde plaits down your back sucking tropicana whilst your busom buds sucked dick, their lips permanently ripe with stories of their sexual exploits, fake tan and glittered nails whilst you sat in the unbroken egg of virginity wondering what it was like to be loved. one day you found out.

lily milligan’s parents gone and a free house for the night, bottles of ouzo and tequila swiped from your mother’s liquor cabinet thinking she wouldn’t know (she always knew) your legs, hardened from pep squad, slut dropping on a kitchen table because the boys thought it would be fun to get the quiet girl drunk. you’d never had a sip before that night. band t-shirts, denim shorts and the split soles of rotten converse that you refuse to let go of, you still clutched with both hands to your youth, but in a tube top now (borrowed from alice carmichael who had a sister in college) and a short tennis skirt, your feet not in trainers but in thigh-high boots. uncomfy as hell but lily said you needed to look sexy. you didn’t know if you wanted to be sexy. you didn’t know what kind of girl you were, if you were even a girl at all. but robbie looked at you like he knew exactly who you were, like he knew you better than you knew yourself, and his lips had the pink cupid’s bow of a movie star, and his hair was dark locks, curling like a mane. his hands were soft, and suddenly on your waist, and after three more shots his lips were on yours and his name was the only sound in your head and on your lips as you lost it in lily’s college sister’s bedroom beneath the glare of a T-Pain poster. you bled for what seemed like hours, his hand still in yours, kissing on the sofa as truth tellers and dare devils continued to spin a bottle of unprecedented youth. you thought it was love. robbie was the one. he loved you, you knew it, how else could someone be so soft? but soon he grew bored, scrunched up your paper heart and set it alight. then came the tears, the hatred, the ‘fuck robbie, in fact, fuck all boys.’ and that you did.

you were known for being easy. any boy could be yours for a night, as long as he promised to love you for those few short breaths and pants before you cried yourself to sleep. you felt poisoned, but poisonous as well, as if by ensnaring these young boys you were gaining power over them, and not the other way around. soon it started to work. they’d want more, but you’d deny them it, sick of sucking off silly schoolboys, they’d call you a tease, a vixen. maybe you were, but you couldn’t help but want older men. you got the history teacher first time, him bending you over his desk to sneak a hand up your tennis skirt as the after-school clubs carried on next door, unawares. love didn’t exist, not for you. it was nothing but a game for pretty young girls to play, bubble gum in their canines and a hand tugging at the hem of their cheer skirt.

there was so much anger inside of your small body, ‘beware of boys and their hook-like words’. hockey helped. there was something formidable about the feeling of a stick like a weapon in your hands and the thwack it made against thighs in the heat of a scrum - “slipped, sorry!” - you’d utter with a snakeskin smile, millicent quinn knowing that you’d hit her on purpose because she shagged robbie at that party last week. she couldn’t prove it, cobbled acne on her forehead turning green with disgust. ben came into your life like a car crash. two years your senior, with a baseball jacket and shoulders like a god. he became your personal hero. on the pitch, he was lethal. together, you could bring anyone to their ruin. each day after last period he’d be waiting in his car. you’d leap into his arms like a girl-half starved, love me, love me, love me, your heated kisses the envy of every junior girl. he was yours for three blissful years, utterly yours, and you were his, his star-spangled girl, and he was your knight - you were both the same, playing games, always difficult to predict. it was a shock to all when he proposed, high-school sweethearts find love in south dakota.

the engagement was a bittersweet affair; three months – you barely out of your gingham print skirts and into a graduation gown, him, a surly quarterback towering above your sisters, cigarette at his lips and a scowl like a fart in a lift. they hated him. so did you. but you were eighteen and in love, and he fitted the cookie cutter mould. everyone wanted him, and you had him. you had him and you were happy, happy, happy, and he loved you. he said he’d give you the world, anything you wanted hand-picked and given to you. instead, he gave you a jack russell terrier and a flat you couldn’t swing a cat in, wallpaper peeling like the rotten bits inside of you, the bits that only he knew. and you got tireder and tireder of the sad excuse of a life he’d picked out for you, him out doing god knows what to pay the bills, and you dancing on tables to pave your way to stardom, and this was love, this was real, until the shine wore off and your fresh-faced, dimple-cheeked cheerleader facade faded and the ugliness started to reveal itself, the whining, the petulance, the sharp-tempered cruelty, the mind games, the need to always win, win, win. he was dull, he was boring, he was nothing like the boy the girls had said he was and no chiselled six pack could hide his lack of anything remotely interesting, your patience wearing thin until it snapped like rubber, a rucksack on your back, running shoes on your feet and the joint bank account emptied into your eighth grade birthday wallet.

you built your small fortunes working the casinos of sioux falls, a crimson dress and an attitude to match. bookish archie with his little dipper freckles was fun for a month, before he became just as dull and dreary as the rest. a three hour bus and you were in minneapolis, bright eyed and bushy tailed, fresh meat ready for the pickings. a hostel here, a friendly co-worker’s sofa there as you made what you could by taking off your clothes and shaking your ass like you were back in pep squad, doing what you did best. you met your fair share of creeps, and soon it was back on the road to escape a wide-eyed stalker and a restless itch for more. milwaukee, chicago, you made the roads your own. log cabins and lodgings, and the occasional motel, a beaten up pick up truck purchased at a scrap merchants – you got a few miles out of it before it bit the dust, and when you finally set it alight after nights spent lounging across the driver’s seat, a parka tucked over you as a duvet, you were sad to see it go. you’re nomadic by fault, never attaching to place, people or things, creating a new personality in every place you go like a character actress; each town is a different repertory theatre, and you’re the star. a compulsive liar, you even fib about your own name, to some you’re ellen, nineteen, bookish, a law student who likes smoking and cosmos. to someone else you’re rita, you’re twenty five and look young for your age, like smoking, comics and fucking in public places.

in the bright lights of michigan, you found charlie, sweet charlie, too good for you, though you let him spoil you while he thought you were the small town girl of his dreams. next came abigail, who was fun until the jealously kicked in, and then luke, gorgeous luke, dangerous, exciting, who despite his temper, despite the fights, despite bruises down your spine and your teeth marks on his arms, loved you with the strength of a wild fire. there was destruction in your wishbones, a savageness from the field, from the pitch and now somehow in his arms, you were godly. he was cruel, he was careless, and he refused to fall at your feet like so many other boys had, which only you made you want him all the more. you were rage incarnate. you hated him so fiercely you thought you might kill him, so he played the only card you wouldn’t predict; proposed.

the house you shared was a backstreet flat in detroit, you making your name as a downtown singer while he footed the bill with pills. they had a drug for anything these days, to dull the senses, to pick them up, to drive you to insanity or pull you out of the madness hole. the two of you lived like criminals on the run (you never told him that you were, living out your days as the enigma he wanted you to be), you with your voice like caramel and fishnet legs. you were his and his alone until his hand was at your throat and the gun was in your hands screaming at him to stop, stop, stop, until a bullet stoppered his brain, crimson staining linoleum as you cast yourself out like lucifer. self defence was decreed the moment they saw your violet neck, black tears and headlight eyes and mind screaming red, red, red like the pom-poms you shook so willingly in school and the insides of his skull. you were gone, and “you” was born, renamed “greta”, boxed, shipped-out, and next-day delivered to livingstone where under witness protection you were a student, blank slate, fresh-faced in a place where no one knew your name, doing what you always did and starting again.

[lhs3020b]

After Noon (1)

So here’s a surprise: somehow, I’m writing fiction again.

I somehow seem to have ended up with a sort of Chocky-meets-r/NoSleep story - it’s quite unlike anything I’ve ever put pen-to-paper on before. What I have so far is under the cut.

Synopsis: a very ordinary London family may or may not be dealing with unEarthly forces. Much confusion happens...

(NB: this is in the style of an r/NoSleep story, so it’s written as if it were real, and as if the viewpoint character were posting to an advice forum or some such thing.)

I'll be honest: Chris was a surprise. But, she's the best surprise we've ever had.

Let me back up and introduce myself. I've never posted here before. It feels really weird that I need to. How did this happen? Why did it happen, and why us? Anyway, I'm already digressing.

My name is Jenny. I'm in my early 30s. I live in London with my partner of eight years, Jo. Jo and I have a six-year old daughter called Christina. Christina wasn't planned and I'll be honest, when we found out, we were quite worried at first. But to my (and Jo’s!) considerable surprise, Chris has ended up being the best thing that's ever happened to us. Sure the sleepless nights were rough and there's all the new problems like childcare, finding a decent school and her amazing ability to wreck all the new clothes we buy her. But seeing her smile, or watching her take her first steps, or listening to the first words she said - absolutely nothing compared. When she spoke for the first time, I honestly thought my heart would melt. I just couldn't believe that someone as frankly-useless and flawed as myself had managed to co-create something as wonderful as this - and accidentally, as well!

Now, here is our problem. Either our beautiful precious daughter is extremely-disturbed, or our family has directly-witnessed an alien apocalypse. I don't like either option.

Yes, it sounds mad, doesn’t it? You’ve just read these words and you’re probably wondering what’s wrong with me. You’ll be thinking, who is this Jenny and why she is having her mental episode here, on our website? Believe me, I’ve asked myself all those questions. But some very weird stuff has been going down inside our normal little family home. Some of it could be coincidence, misunderstanding, whatever. But the rest of it? I genuinely-can’t account for some of what’s happened.

Why us? Why our daughter? What were we supposed to do? Could we have done anything? Should we have done anything? I don’t know. Frankly, I’m posting here because I’m near my wits end. My family is a mess, my daughter is in pieces. I’m not sleeping full nights anymore. I don’t know what to do, but I’m hoping maybe some of you might.

Basically, please hear me out. I’m desperate.

You’re probably feeling uneasy already. I don’t blame you. It's all a lot to take in. Let me start from the beginning. Perhaps some context will help make sense of all this.

Perhaps there was a subtle hint of what was to come when she started talking. Chris didn't start with individual words. Instead, the first thing we got from her was a full sentence. I was cooking in the kitchen and she was in her high chair. It was a mid-afternoon in December about four years ago - London being London, the Sun had almost set, so I had the lights on already. I was just about to start boiling an egg when Chris suddenly pointed, and said "It's an egg!"

(Well, actually, what she said sounded more like "Hitsa hegg!", but the meaning was clear enough.)

Needless to say I immediately went into squee mode. Jo got called in and went into squee mode too. Chris loved the attention, though it was another two days before she spoke again. After that, the floodgates opened. Our health visitor said she'd never seen linguistic development this fast. Chris, apparently was very smart. The news sent us over the moon with joy.

And this is where our tale goes into high gear, becuase I'm not so certain that she was as precocious as we were told. Don't get me wrong - our daughter is a special young lady, and a bright one too. But I've got some reason to believe that someone, or something, had helped her along the way a bit.

It was when she turned five that we first met Noon.

'Jenny, it's not unusual,' Jo told me. 'I had an imaginary friend when I was little.'

I blinked. 'You did?' I'd never heard this story. (And here's one unexpected side-effect of having Chris: I was getting to know my partner all over again, better than I did beforehand.)

He nodded. 'Yeah. I had a comfort blanket. I gave it a name and took it everywhere.' He looked a bit embarrassed. 'I think my parents hated it. In hindsight, can't completely blame them, really.'

'But you didn't think it was real ...' I prompted.

He shook his head. 'Not really, no. It was more about having someone to talk to.'

'She's got us to talk to,' I said, maybe a little defensive.

'True,' he said. 'But - look, I'm sure it will be fine. Once she's settled into the new class at primary school.'

I breathed out, feeling myself relax a little. Jo was right. I was being overprotective. Don't judge me too hard - I've never been a parent before, and I'm having to make it up as I go along! A few stumbles were probably inevitable. I'd been worrying too much. Doubtless Jo was right and the Noon business was just a reaction to the recent changes at her school.

Her class had been split up. One of the teachers abruptly quit halfway through the term, under murky circumstances. Plus the school's been having money problems, like too many others across the country. It's inevitable that all this adult-work-chaos stuff would have some impact on the children, as much as everyone tries to shield them from it. Contrary to what many people think, kids aren't stupid. In fact they sometimes see things more clearly then we do, because they don't yet have the layers of cotton-wool self-delusion we pad ourselves out with. When stuff is going down, they'll pick up on it.

But if that was the case, then there was good news too. Once the school situation settled down, we'd stop hearing about Chris's new imaginary friend all the time too.

My relief was to be short-lived. Later that very evening, there was a development.

I was sitting down with Chris in the living room. We'd had dinner. She'd been good and had used her little plastic knife and fork all through the meal. Normally I call it a win if I can even get her to pick them up, let alone neatly cut-and-skewer all her food. But of course we want to reinforce it if she does well, so I was allowing her an extra hour or so with her crayons and drawing stuff, before bed-time.

She was sat on the carpet, cross-legged, looking very serious in that way that small children do sometimes when they know an adult is watching. There was a sheet of paper in front of her. She picked up a red crayon. She then proceeded to draw a red ellipse on the paper. It might have been meant to be a circle, but to be brutally-honest, it looked more like a sort of obese beetroot.

'That's very pretty, dear,' I said.

Apparently I'd picked the right tone of voice (I still don't really have that skill, sadly). She beamed at me. Then she frowned and looked at the other crayons.

'I can't find it, Mummy,' she said.

'You can't find what?' I asked. Now, I almost with I hadn't.

She said, 'I need to draw the other sun, Mummy. But I need a white crayon.'

The other sun? What? I know I must have looked baffled, because suddenly Chris's lip trembled. She always reacts strongly to our moods. Learning to regulate my emotional expression - well, let's be honest, I still trip up on that one.

To cover my confusion, I reached over to her left. The white crayon had rolled over there when we tipped them out of their box. I think she must have missed it. 'Here it is, dear,' I said.

She beamed and took the crayon from me, grasping it in her pudgy little fingers. I breathed a private sigh of relief. Apparently my little slip a moment ago hadn't mattered too much.

Chris frowned at the page. 'It's very small,' she said. She drew a barely-visible white circle with the crayon. 'That's too big. But I can't make it smaller. Small sun.'

'It's lovely, dear,' I said. 'The Sun is usually yellow, though.' (I have a friend, Fiona, who's an astronomer. At this point she would be ranting about how the Sun can't be yellow because sunlight is white light by definition, so this must be yet another popular delusion reiterated uncritically by poor scientific comms, etc. etc. Perhaps it was just as well that Fiona wasn't here with us this evening.)

Chris scowled. 'Not ours,' she said. 'Where Noon is from. They have two suns there.'

Noon was from a place with two suns? That really did throw me for six. Where on earth could Chris have got that idea from? I mean, points for creativity. I wouldn't have thought of that when I was a child! But still, this was some left-field stuff.

'Noon says there are two suns?' I asked.

Chris nodded, enthusiastically. She liked talking about Noon. 'She was telling me about it earlier.'

Noon was a she? That was new too. So far, we'd had no idea about Noon's gender, or even if the concept could be applied. Like Brexit, Noon was Noon, but what that actually meant had been a mystery for none but the elect to know. (Late last night as we lay in bed, Jo had commented to me that you could tell it was 2019 because the cool kids had non-binary imaginary friends. I whacked him with a pillow, though I will admit I did also snigger, just for a moment.)

Chris added, 'And it's always daytime where Noon is.'

You have to cut Chris a little slack. She's very young, so her world-building still has some research errors here and there. But perhaps now was as good a time as any for a little bit of education. I said, 'That's very interesting. Here, we have day and night. Because the Earth spins. Which is why we see the Sun rise and set.'

Chris was apparently ready for this. 'Noon says it used to do that where she is.' The little girl frowned, puckering her lip. 'But Noon says that was a very long time ago. It doesn't do it anymore. It slowed down, and stopped. Now it's daylight on one side. And it's night on the other. All the time.'

There was a pause.

'Noon says that's why she calls herself that. Her breed-group - she says that like a family - live in the middle of the day. So it's always noon where she is.' Chris picked up a black crayon and drew a wobbly horizon-line, below the two suns. 'She says it's not that weird. Our Moon is the same.'

Then she said three words, deliberately, slowly and carefully. Like someone was reciting them to her. And they were three words you don't expect to hear from a small child. 'Tidally-locked rotation.' Then she beamed and laughed, actually bouncing a little. Like she was really pleased that she'd managed to get it all right.

Breed-group? Like the Moon? Tidally-locked? What the hell?

This was starting to get faintly-weird. Chris had clearly put a lot of work into this. Or, someone had primed her with it. I found myself thinking of her school, and all the stuff that was happening there. Perhaps someone had given a weird assembly. Dumped some stuff into the kids' heads, well-meaningly, but before the children were really ready to absorb it? Or - no, wait, I had it! It would have been during one of the gaps in teaching-hours, wouldn't it? It would be just like the school to park the kids in a room with a video somewhere while the adults faffed about. They'd been left watching some sort of sci-fi thing, hadn't they? That was where all this must be coming from!

Carefully, I said, 'It's very nice of Noon to share about her life. I hope she likes it where she is.'

I didn't expect what happened next. Suddenly, Chris burst into tears. And these were proper floods. These were the-neighbour-ran-over-our-dog-and-I-saw-it-all tears. These were serious-business tears. Something was badly wrong.

'Oh honey, what's the matter?' Quickly I gathered her into my arms. She was still clutching the crayons, weeping hysterically. I heard feet thumping along the corridor outside. Jo had heard, and was coming running.

I did my best to soothe the distraught child as her father joined us. He looked at me, questioningly. Quickly I shook my head, mouthing, No love, I have no idea what set this off. I don't know whether he fully-understood what I said, or whether this was just parent-telepathy time. But either way, Jo joined the group-effort that was calming our daughter.

Finally we got Chris settled a little. Her face was still red and puffy but the sobs had softened away and the waterworks had calmed down. I held her - she felt very warm, and very precious - and rocked her from side-to-side. I was verging between deep concern for my daughter and wanting to smack Noon for whatever she'd done - which was completely irrational, given that at that point, I didn't believe that Noon existed.

When we'd settled our little girl enough, I think Jo and I both decided that there'd been enough drawing for one night. She didn't protest as we put the crayons away. Jo fetched her a hot chocolate - her favourite drink - and I dug out the laptop. We have a carefully-curated YouTube cartoons list (believe me, I don't let Chris anywhere near the "something is wrong on the Internet" stuff!) and I put one of her favourites on. We watched it together. Between it, the hot chocolate and maybe a bit of Mum's own-brand cuddles, Chris finally calmed. Soon, she was very tired. It was evident that bedtime was near. The day's drama had exhausted her.

Shortly after, we were tucking her into bed. I sat with her, holding her hand, as she drifted off. I was feeling both worried and relieved. Worried because that eruption earlier had been terrifying. Relieved because at least it was over.

Then something new happened.

Just as she was about to fall asleep, Chris muttered something. 'Noon says the little white one will kill them all.'

[holland-stan-posts]

To the only boy I love - Sebastian Stan

Summary: you've joined Sebastian meanwhile he is filming in Greece, turns out you get bored and catch up in all his films...but then you both make an agreement to watch one and unconsciously you hurt his feels.

Warnings: HIGH SPOILER OF THE MOVIE "THE APPARITION" AND TOOK THE INSPIRATION FROM "TO ALL THE BOYS I'VE LOVED BEFORE" LOADS OF SWEARING TOO. You've been aware. 😂

A/N: I wanna specially thanks to my friend @kirawritesaboutevanstan for checking out this thing for me and making my shit writing into a fairytale one! Thanks baba, ily loads. ALSO CHECK OUR HER AMAZING WRITING HERE. (Highly recommend 'The Anchor in their lives' ❤)

M a s t e r l i s t

(THE PIC IS NOT MINE I TOOK IT FROM AN INSTAGRAM PAGE)

Basically, you've toured Greece from one end to the other in these two weeks. You were done, screwed. But your boyfriend was filming, and as support, you have to stay next to him. Not that you're there obligated to do so, but you took a month off from work, so you decided to join him during that time.

The thing is; you are officially bored.

Athens was nice, you took loads of pics and even wandered through smalls islands from Greece, so now you're sitting on the big sofa that Sebastian’s rented apartment has.

It's big, comfortable and almost feels like home. It's situated near the filming location which means it's quiet and very calm. Not really like your apartment back in SoHo. And as much as you hated to admit it but you sort of miss the constant noise of the city.

Now you spent your days alone, on the big couch, fighting with the remote control or with the devices since they're in Greek. However, you cherish every moment your boyfriend comes back from work. He'd snuggle on your side. He is warm and very welcoming, so hugging him is a totally win-win situation.

Also, he is very private when it comes to you. He doesn't post many pics of you on his social media, like on Instagram stories or WhatsApp's status. He likes you to keep you to himself. Mostly. That changed when he often found you screaming at the t.v. Because of a movie you were watching. He finds himself enjoying when you're watching a horror film, and then you're saying things like "don't fucking turn around Josh, you gotta get yourself killed dumbass!" or "KISS HIM ALREADY ALEX! CAN'T YOU SEE THE GUY HAS A CRUSH ON YOU?". His camera is ready for your endless reactions. He just loves that.

You've set yourself a goal, a few days ago. You've told yourself to start watching again Sebastian’s old & new films.

So by the time he made home today, he found you with a pillow in your hands, your popcorn bowl next to you and as snug as a bug in rug wrapped up in a blanket.

Let's not forget is HOT AS HELL in Greece right now, but due to the A.C. systems, you're freezing.

You are screaming to a Ben on the screen.  Your eyes light up when you spotted Sebastian standing in the door frame, eyes tired and with a happy smile.

You pause the movie and stare at him.

“Long day?” he only nods and walk to the comfy sofa and lays next to you.

“Was it hard? Do you want something to eat? I ordered a take out because you must be tired of my food by now” you scratch his hair carefully.

“I love your food, but take out sounds good too,” he says, instantaneously closing his eyes.

*  

You're back at your business, he already took a shower and is full of energy next to you, his Chinese food on a plate, his phone in his hands.

“What are we watching?” he asks nonchalantly.

“The Apparition” you grin.

“What? Babe, are you kidding right?” he laughs at your choice.

“Nope, I found the movie on Netflix and damn, those abs were gold back in time Stan” you tease.

“True thing, they were. But now? They kill” he winks at your direction, and you just roll your eyes playfully.

He left the room again, and you started the movie again decided to finish it, once again you're screaming at the screen since the characters are sort of dumb.

“I can't understand why they haven't left the house yet! It's haunted for fuck's sake!” you screamed at no one in particular.

“I don't think you understand that part babe. The house is not haunted. It's Ben, well sort of” Sebastian explains with the toothbrush in his mouth. He left again and then you suddenly got scared, so a pillow is being attacked by your hands now.

“Shit. Shit. Shit. They're going to die!” when Sebastian’s character dies you literally do a facepalm. “WHAT THE FUCK DUDE? You can't just die! Damn thing!” again, Sebastian’s phone is recording you. You get to the scene where the girl dies, so you're completely tense, waiting for the moment to happen. You don't even register him coming, still recording. Your bowl of popcorn in your hands, chewing slowly. When the demon takes the girl, Sebastian decides it's a good time to scream, he does, and the next thing your popcorn is flying around all over the living room.

“FUCKING HELL SEBASTIAN YOU SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME YOU DUMBASS!” you hit him with the pillow, he is having a hard time breathing because he is laughing so hard.

“I'm sorry, baby! It was just so fun!” he says between laughs.

“Shut the hell up. You're lucky I didn't kick you out for that little prank you did there” you hiss at him and sit down on the couch.

He stops laughing and walks towards you, looking like a sad puppy. Jumping next to you, ignoring him you look for another movie on Netflix to watch. His head flies to your lap, looking at you.

“Babe? Please, I'm sorry. Would you forgive me? I'll do anything for you” he begs.

That exact moment you found the movie everyone is talking about.

“Okay I'll forgive you if you watch this movie with me!” you stare at him and kiss his nose.

“Oh no, babe! I'll do anything else just don't make me watch a rom-com!” he says whining and acting like a child.

He, in fact, loves to watch movies, but when is a rom-com from Netflix he is not a very big fan of them.

“C'mon jerk, you scared me. Now you get your payback. Oh and bring new popcorn” you smile innocently.

“You're lucky I love you” he mutters and goes to the kitchen for a new bowl of popcorn.

"To All the Boys I've Loved Before" is on and ready to start. You can say it's not going to be good based on the trailer you watched earlier, but since everyone is talking about a Peter Kavinsky, you want to see now.

When everything is set up, Sebastian immediately hugs you, using your shoulder as his pillow. The movie starts, and you both get so engulfed in it.

“I’d fucking move out of the country if that happens to me,” you tell to Sebastian who agrees when you see how Lara Jean’s letters are nowhere to be seen.

“Look, babe, he is writing little love letters to her,” you say in awe.

“He only wants to play with her. She's going to end up with Josh, believe me. TeamJosh” he says now wholly focused in the movie, he even left his spot on your shoulder.

“How so? He is her sister ex-boyfriend! That can't happen! It's a code we all agree on when we start dating! Do not date your boyfriend/girlfriend friends or family! Also, look at Peter! He is totally into her!” you say now.

“You'll see,” he says shrugging his shoulders.

“Oh boy! He really declares his love over the letters! I'm dying! This is so damn cute! He even stands up for her in the school! I told you!” you say tearing up when the end credits show up.

“Don't die, baby. I love you” Sebastian says really concerned.

“JUST LOOK AT THEM! I wish I could receive love letters too. Peter Kavinsky is so perfect! I want one too” you cry.

“Ouch. That's hurt my ego a bit” he breaks apart the hug and looks at you a bit hurt.

“Oh please, it's a fictional character” you explain with a shrug.

“It's okay. Let's go to bed. I have a long day tomorrow” he walks away, leaving you to clean the mess.

Later that night, after all the cleaning, you go to bed finding Sebastian sleeping deeply.

You check your phone for new messages when you found three notifications from Instagram where Sebastian mentioned you in his story.

The first one is where you are screaming at the t.v. Watching The Apparition. The caption is “someone decided to catch up on my old movies...I think I did a good job in that one. @yourusername ❤”

The other one is where he scared you, and the popcorn flies all over the place. “Sorry baby, you just looked so cute all scared @yourusename. 😜”

And the third is one you didn't notice he took. A pic of you swiping your tears away while you were watching the other movie. “She told me to watch this rom-com as a payback for the prank, now she's crying because she wants a Peter Kavinsky in her life...I'm slightly offended @yoursusername” you smile at the pic, his back is turned to you, so for tonight, you decide to be the big spoon.

Whispering a “you're way better than a Peter Kavinsky” in his ear you fall asleep, with your hands on his waist, your head resting on his back. Slowly he covers your hands with his and let you hug him tighter.

The next morning you wake up alone, Sebastian is long gone, you close your eyes a bit more, and when you reach for your phone in the nightstand you touch a paper that falls, so you got up and look for it.

You were on the border of tears. You didn't expect him to do that. He is the most incredible person you could ever wish for.

When Sebastian comes back home that night, he found on the coffee table some pizza’s boxes with coke, a movie ready to start and you standing there, with a rose.

“Babe? What's all this?” he asks clearly confused.

“Sorry I told that I want another guy in my life, I said that without thinking about your feelings. You're the only boy I want in my life” you held the rose in front of him to take. He takes it carefully.

“Normally a guy brings his girl flowers not the other way around” he laughs with tears in his eyes, reading the little paper that is in the rose, 'To the Only Boy I Love'.

“I know. But I think my boy should get flowers too. I love you Seb, a lot” you run to hug him, hiding your face in his neck. He whispers a slowly "Love you too" instantaneously he hugs you back, and stays there for a while, then cups your face and kisses you deeply.

When both your lungs scream for air, he breaks apart and whispers  “Hi” and smiles.

“Hi” you greet him too.

“Okay, let's go to see those movies” he laughs, kissing you again.

“Wait, you were serious? I honestly was thinking to let you choose tonight” you smile taking his hand.

“Really?” You nod, and his smile is bigger than ever.

He gives you a peck on your lips and runs to the couch, choosing an action movie and then pats the space next to him. “C'mon let's watch this one and then we'll watch one of your choices.”

“Oh Gosh, it's going to be a long night” you smile but cuddle next to him anyways.

*

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