#release painful experiences
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This photo has been infused with Energy to Release Painful Experiences. Use with Energy to Release Painful Experiences video, https://bit.ly/3CBzPIj. Please make sure you nurture yourself after using this video. The October Reiki Sunday Special is for releasing anyone/anything that no longer serves your best interest. For more on this hour long session go to, reikifromLourdes.com #restrelaxationreiki #reikifromlourdes #reiki #energyhealing #reikihealing #releasepain #releasepainfulexperience
#energy#reiki#energy healing#reikifromlourdes#restrelaxationreiki#reikihealing#reikicharged#spiritual guidance#release painful experiences#release pain
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Accept this face of mine, mute and begging.
Accept this love I ask for.
Accept the part of me that is you.
— Alejandra Pizarnik; 'En Tu Aniversário'
#ted lasso#tedlassoedit#rebecca welton#ted x rebecca#tvedit#tvgifs#bbelcher#gifs#tedbecca#my stuff#I watched the show for the first time exactly a year ago today#it went by fast except... it didnt? idek#when will they release a teaser im like honest to god on the verge of a breakdown#anyway i realize its always a pain to make syncronized gifs like these because a bunch of people will NOT see them synced#but if you wanna get the ful experience its easier on mobile just reblog go to your blog wait for the gifs to load then immediately refresh#that should do the trick#stupid to make stuff ppl need instructions to consume but thats what ive got for today#in conclusion why are they the same person if theyre not gonna kiss? literally whats all that
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What did you think was gonna happen to poor nobodies like us? Face it, kid, there’s nothing either of us can do right now. You want to save lives? Then I suggest you start by taking the hush money and saving your life first.
#had this done a month ago. releasing it from my basement vault of pieces i was too lazy to post 💀#colored explorations‚ studies‚ and experiments#MHA#YOUR PAIN RAINS OVER ME#uraraka ochako#also. don't ask. don't. please. i know. this wip is so old. it lives forever in my mind tho. so... yeah.
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i always forget i have Healthcare System Anxiety until i have to interact with The Healthcare System and immediately just start screaming internally for days
#my mom obliterated her bones and the pre-surgery surgery post-surgery experience. the ER situation. moving 2 the woods#this is a vent post i forget my complaining tag#waited 30 mins for an ambulance & when we called back they were like ''yeah it hasnt been assigned to anyone & might be hours''#so i drove her to the ER with a migraine & ran over some pylons (cool).#stuck in the ER for 9 hours. took 4 hours for anyone to give her any kind of pain management. i caught covid#was supposed to get a call when she was out of her 2 hrs max surgery. was told i could call if i hadn't heard anything#5 hours later i called and was transferred 6 times - told she had been discharged - told she had never been registered at that hospital -#yelled at by a nurse for asking for patient information - eventually got the right department and was told oh yeah sorry she's in recovery#was supposed to find out if she could come home or not in 30 mins. 3 hours later theyre like OK come get her#i show up and the doors to that wing are. locked? and no one's there to unlock them?#apparently i was supposed to pick up the wall phone? and call a code they hadn't given me? spent 30 mins getting help from other department#to GET THEM TO OPEN THE DOORS. FREE HER RELEASE HER#finally i get in and she's OK SHES FINE except morphine doesn't work on her so that's. fine. bodies are good to have#we have reached shrimp colours levels of anxiety i am a walking talking stress migraine but she's doing ok. but holy fuck#kayvswords#also like she's black and all of her nurses and doctors have been white so feeling normal about all of it all around
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it's funny that anon talking about being a late bloomer sent that ask today because I just got done having a conversation about how being a late bloomer can really fuck with your brain. specifically, I think I've narrowed down why it's hard for people who aren't late bloomers to conceptualize why it can fuck with your brain.
non-late bloomers see romantic experiences in their youth as trivial because they've probably had infinitely better experiences since then. they might struggle to understand why anyone would envy that first experience, especially when they're so often... Not Great. meanwhile, late bloomers are still ruminating on when they'll get to have their first experience.
I don't think that having a first kiss as a teenager like the rest of my peers would've made me better off full stop. I do think that it would have assured me, in a real and tangible way, that somebody at least ONCE has wanted to kiss me. and the longer I go on without that tangible evidence, the more it means to me.
because that kiss could have been gross and slimy and otherwise unremarkable, but I would be reassured that at one point in time, there was a person who looked at me and thought, "I wanna kiss you." which feels infinitely better than never knowing at all.
#mjspeaks#it's less the thing taking place at a specific time and more so the reassurance that someone has wanted to do that thing with you#and when you begin to crave doing these things as a teenager but don't get that release... it does a number on your self-esteem#now that I'm in my 20s it isn't like. world-ending to me anymore. but it is a deep and unique pain#I missed out on a lot of 'typical' teenage experiences bc of my upbringing. and I make up for them everyday in adulthood#which is why I wrote late-bloomer!! bc it sucks being 'behind' regardless of how okay it is. we know it's okay. it still hurts#anyway there's nothing wrong with you if you're a late bloomer. you'll get that reassurance someday. people love in silence all the time#and you deserve someone to love you out loud!
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can you imagine having the same special interest or hyperfixation as levi? The both of you spending long nights just talking about it or engaging with it, hyping eachother up and infodumping the stuff you both already know? absolutely freaking out in a way that only you two can, making your relationship even more special?
#this goes for any of the guys but levi is my special boy +w+bb#listen. my fav. music artist is releasing a new album tomorrow and i want to scream about it with levi. i wanna listen to it with him...#... and yell about the beauties and talk about the pain and stim&giggle and scream from autistic joy.#man i cannot imagine sharing a special interest with someone im that close with.#like. itd be both heaven and hell. help#im choosing to only see the good side of it tho <3 levi would never do me wrong (he would in this case <3)(as would i)#obey me leviathan#obey me#sillyposting#i wanna write a bigger thingie about this but. 12am. + not enough ideas. yet :)#itd be hard bc i rarely experience joy like this and i'd need it to write about it :/#oh well =w=b#anyway autistic levi 100% canon.
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did anyone else go through trauma in 2016 when leonard cohen released one of the greatest albums of all time and then died like two weeks later. in the same year that david bowie also released one of the greatest albums of all time and died two days later.
#i bought both albums the day they were released and all they caused me was pain#hearing about leonard's death after spinning YWID for two weeks was .... an experience.#and i cried every single day for a solid two weeks after david died. like i was sobbing in school / at home / on the bus uncontrollably
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Lord grant me the strength to call the doctor's office tomorrow to ask for a bloodtest
#and the hair dresser because i start ripping out my hair because it feels so bad lol#but god i hate that office so much#i haven't been there since 2021 because I'm sick of them so much#i have no idea what came out of that bloodwork because i didn't get through#but yeah i need to ask for a prescription and i may as well get it done#it's not like I'll have to interact with the doctor if it's one of the bitches (who genuinely deserve to be set on fire#for the way they treat patients. they seriously shouldn't be allowed to be around anyone ever in general)#I'll just leave#and if it's the one that's kinda ok I'll just ask for what i want#and maybe I'll see if i find another office in the next quarter of the year#but i mean. I'm realistic enough to know that that's pretty much impossible#but ugh I'll also have to make a gyn appointment and ask my psych if i can get a doctor's note#hell on earth#these people have too much power#also ffs just offer online booking#(my gyn does that but it's so specific that I'm afraid I'll click something wrong and will have to pay extra ot#or get an appointment for something i didn't want? idk it's confusing#i hate being alive#release me from the pain of having to make doctor's appointments#the most humiliating experience imaginable
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it makes me so viscerally angry that rule of rose is like $800-1000 nothing should ever cost that much especially not something that used to cost like $15-20
#I JUST WANT TO PLAY ITTTTTTTT#i know i could emulate but ive never emulated before and its such a hassle#even if i did have the money it would be hard to justify bc of how ass the combat and gameplay loop are#i just wanna experience the story myself and go at my own pace and explore the world#ive watched a lets play but that just cant capture the same feeling as playing it#ough#i wish i was like. not a small child in 2006 and i couldve bought all of these ps2 survival horror titles for $15-20#instead of now having to pay $100-1000 per game for a physical copy#the only reason i own sh2 is bc it was a gift#and i wanna collect 1 3 and 4 when i can financially do so#its just such a pain and so unnecessary#i wish studios would do hd re-releases of these games on pc and ps4 or smth#ones that dont suck ass (COUGH SILENT HILL HD COLLECTION COUGH)#bc FUCK the sh2 remake i just want the og in a format that wont cost me $100-200. unrelated lol sorry#anyway. longwinded way of saying liking ps2 survival horror games is a curse and rule of rose is my white whale#mine
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Youtube autoplay (even though it's supposed to be off X_X): *sneakily plays another song after the one I was checking out*
Me: Ooo I like this, what is it?
Youtube: It's a new song by Sawano Hiroyuki :)
Me: There's a new song by Sawano Hiroyuki that I haven't heard??
Youtube: It's for the Fate/strange fake anime
Me: For the -- THERE'S A FATE/STRANGE FAKE ANIME???!
#lmao i was SO confused until i looked it up#no apparently it's not out yet it's releasing july 2nd.#we're all good#i was like. i know i've been completely abducted by the sil//m fandom for almost a year but#i didn't think i'd been /that/ out of touch with the anime side of things#jeez XD#ANYWAY it looks great :)#some of my faves are back; can't wait to see waver and gil again!#(which as we all know is code for: can't wait to experience gut-wrenching pain again XD)
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#hellllo ryan ross enjoyers do you care to experience pain with me#friendly reminder that there are ryan ross songs. they are out there :(#even friendlier reminder that he was performing original songs in 2019 and saying he would release them in 2020 and then did not. :(((((#is anyone else um. feeling#there are others too this is just the one that is floating in my head currently. haunting#ryan ross#orig
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i miss my dad but i need to keep reminding myself that yesterday doesn’t matter, tomorrow doesn’t even matter until it happens, i just need to focus on the here and now and the present moment, and make the best of what i have now, bc its all we ever have ;_;
#love u dad#txt#truly if there’s anything wrong it’s really smth wrong im feeling and experiencing inside of myself which i can release#;___;#grief is a lot. hard isn’t the right word cause i dont mind if something is hard i work my ass off. grief is just very much and esp emotion#i really miss my dad bc if i had anything to say he would always listen and be interested in it and care about it#whatever i did or thought he was genuinely interested in it#that love is irreplaceable#u are so privileged until u lose it and realize just how significant it was to you and your whole life and daily experience#still surreal to me#i really really love you dad#im not afraid of pain. pain is temporary. loss is far greater in depth and impact which is felt and persists#i can withstand anything#fear may be our greatest enemy but it is also a total illusion#if i can withstand pain and loss and i must because this is just where life has lead me then i can withstand anything#also reminding myself that my loss is MY loss and it is not my dad’s… i am truly happy that he is free now TT#if i lose then it must be because i have so much more to gain and space must be cleared for it#personal
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It’s time for Mal to Talk in the tags again because I’m too tired to do homework or write so I’m gonna use my energy for this
#ranting online is kinda therapeutic since I can’t get therapy? ok so I just wanted to mention this and ramble#i about cried talking to my himbo friend over the phone the other day because he told me. the day I read that chapter (well. 1/4 of it)#to my discord server in the vc he came in and checked on me a few times and he said he hasn’t seen me look that happy in so long and it#hurts because I had to end that event early because I couldn’t breathe but I had so much fun talking to ppl and doing the reading bc I get#✨dramatic✨ and shit and yknow overall it was just such a great experience except for the not breathing part (the gods are punishing me for#the Bye Bye Air Collar from WJH) and anyway it just reminded me all over again how Unhappy I am constantly. i have spent my entire life#being treated like complete dirt by family and friends and bosses and coworkers and classmates and everyone under the sun so the second i#feel appreciated by Anyone I break into tears it’s So Bad. so like I enjoy going to work because even tho it’s so tiring and it’s so hard#dealing with customers sometimes I love it anyway because like. i feel appreciated there. by my boss and a handful of coworkers at least.#and that’s so much better than being in this house and feeling like I’m the devil’s spawn all over again sent to ruin everybody’s life by#merely existing. so work is a double-edged sword because it’s another source of Pain but it’s ALSO an escape which is Totally Healthy but#then there’s my fanfics. writing what I wanna write and sharing it with you guys and tormenting you and my blorbos is a kind of happiness I#will never find anywhere else. reading that to the server was one of those moments of pure euphoria even if I was plagued by Stage Fright#at the same time. so yeah. it really really really deepens my already horrid depression that I can’t write and I can’t release content rn#bc it means that source of pure happiness is gone with it and I’m left feeling all worthless again. idk how to fix all this. idk if I can.#I’m just so so so tired;;;;;#i forgot where I was going with this I feel like I keep repeating myself but anyway that’s all for now I’m gonna go see if I can cry#oh! one more thing. i haven’t talked to my Blood Family (apart from my sisters and Rarely my dad) SINCE I GOT KICKED OUT but last night my#aunt called me and we talked about my mother and she had a breakdown to me over the phone so I remembered all over again what it was like#living with my mother and maybe realized I never actually processed any of that trauma. it’s all just coming pouring out thru my writing.#all the Abuse themes going on in CMTO? 100% projection so sorry u had to witness this guys 💜 but anyway she told me I rlly helped validate#her own feelings and apologized for crying to me ab this but I told her what I tell everyone—that Crying Is Good For The Soul#and maybe that’s why I’ve been crying so much lately. because I need to. and I need to stop holding everything in. my friends are genuinely#worried and I somehow convinced myself that they have better things to do than listen to my whining. so anyway I’m gonna go cry 💜#for self care purposes. ok done for real this time see y’all soon next time I decide to rant in the tags again#mal rants
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god I cannot get over how good the set it off show was
#I’m rewatching videos rather than studying for my exam tomorrow 😳#I can’t help it was such an amazing time#they better come back to van bc I cannot and will not go all the way to toronto but I will absolutely go back to van to see them again#and I know the girl I went with would come too she was so great to go with bc we just lost our minds together the entire time#god. it was so good the energy was just so amazing and seeing one of my favourite bands live was unparalleled#and considering my other favourite artists are disbanded on indefinite hiatus or haven’t released an album in eight years#I doubt it will be surpassed#honestly. barring how much pain I was in by the end of the night one of the best experiences of my life I think#such an amazing show
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"Breaking The Silence" ...New Release Sale Blitz and Giveaway Hosted By Silver Dagger Book Tours...
Breaking The SilenceConfronting Guilt and Shame…by Debra MorganGenre: Wellness, Chronic Pain, Self-HelpMarch 14th and 15th
“Breaking The Silence Receives A 5-Star Editorial Book Review Awarded By Reader’s Favorite 2024!”Deb Morgan, the author of the Amazon best-selling memoir “Graceful Agony: An Intimate Memoir of Living with Fibro & Chronic Fatigue,” has published a new book titled “Breaking…
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#Author Debra Morgan#being hosted#Book Tour Blitz SIlver Dagger#bookbloggers#bookreview#Breaking The Silence#Kindle Sale#new book about chronic pain#New Book Release#overcoming shame and guilt#paperback sale#Personal Experiences
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Woslom - Brokenbones
#Woslom#A Near Life Experience#Brokenbones#Full-length#Release date:#April 14th#2016#Genre:#Thrash Metal#Themes:#Pain#Death#Brazil
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