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saintwilllem · 4 years

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FORM YOUR LOVE .

so this is my analysis of both for your love and form of sympathy put into one as they are both of the same world. i am tagging @55bubble as i really want their opinion and thoughts on this but everyone comment / reblog and let me know what you think. also if you need clarifications on anything please let me know i’ve been writing this half asleep after a hard days of work. i may also visit this again as the form of sympathy goes on.

firstly i don’t know why i didn’t realize this is at first but both titles inform the themes and ideas of the comic. for your love is basically the story of understanding love and what it will ask of you . both moogyeong and yohan have to see rejections through ( moogyeong his own , yohan his brother’s ) and the way it leaves them feeling to get to the end goal of love because what transpired between moogyeong and junseo was a crush that held him but it didn’t drive depth because it was something he would always try to brush off and hide away from . yohan on the other hand sees his rejection through his brother’s unrequited love and what that does is makes him overly cautious and stops him from looking inward and try to drive someone else’s story in hopes that he can be the “fairy-godmother,” this time around. it isn’t until he looks at moogyeong not as a project but a person and therefore look inward does he realize that moogyeong doesn’t need to evolve its him . on the other hand form of sympathy is the story of different forms of sympathies . the main versions of this story branch sympathy from yuri to his noona , to himself , and to sunwoo , goes on to his noona and him , and her new family , and lastly the real show of that is between sunwoo toward yuri. what i find interesting is that sympathy is defined two different ways : feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune and secondly , the understanding between people ; common feeling . you see both these definitions play into the story. for example both meanings align with yuri and his noona’s relationship. it starts with sorrow on her misfortune and then becomes a connection between them both . in the face of yuri and sunwoo their sympathy is still on the first meaning , and were sunwoo feels sorrow , i think yuri after chapter 30 is just starting to leave the stages of pity.

both stories are about unrequited love. yet in for your love it lingers, while in form of sympathy it festers . Within for your love it is put to ease by the way people feeling it behave. moogyeong decides to be quite about his love , in small part due to fear and another is that he himself isn't a man of big gesture. he finds himself crashing into yohan who at first wants to break this boundary of fear and smallness and wants to make it loud and known . he doesn’t get the issue of it because he has seen the aftermath of being rejected first hand and on someone he’s really cared about and he doesn’t want that again. as i said before is what really alleviates the pain of seeing junseo with someone else , and mooyeong still thinking about him is the final act of looking inward. we see yohan clearly state that he loves moogyeong and it isn’t because of his brother or any other grand gesture but the fact that this is a person he feels at peace with and he will do what needs to be done to. improve himself for both of them because he can look at what has to be with peace.

now with form of sympathy the unrequited are impressed with history that equated to them thinking themselves fundamentally more important than they really were. one may question the kindness of noona and how she would always just give herself away to yuri . she would always let him tag along , she would come to his school when he was in trouble , she cared for him at the funeral of her parents when she should have been taken care of . i am of the catagory that she gave him so much because she felt for him as having love taken from you but also because she may have felt that she had to give yuri a mother figure to thank his mother for doing that for her and the way she thought of him. and so what i think this has done is open a feeling of over importance inside of yuri in which he believes that he is her center and that she is his , inside of her being a line that stands next to him and up lifts him. this has made him cruel , because he feels unbalanced and he uses sunwoo as his target because his history with his brother in law leaves parts of him on sunwoo and also because he can’t fully go after his brother in law because that would hurt noona. sunwoo is someone he has power over not just because he knows his feelings and has been used as a substitute for them but also because of who they are to each other. they will always have the dynamic of student and teacher over them but the fact is that this isn’t school , its real life and yuri has opened up the darkest corners of sunwoo and taken control of them from the dinner with alll four of them , to just being a needle that pricks sunwoo during their working together. yet in the last few chapters of season one we see a flip of power or rather we see sunwoo and his guidance starting to tug at yuri . now the history between brother in law and sunwoo is also simillar to that of yuri and noona because they also were just rhust into each other lives, and it seems like sunwoo created something out of brother in law that wasn’t there. i don’t remember if we get any really background into their relationship besides brother in law joining the movie club out on a whim and sunwoo just tied himself into him . and i think that its the same reason as to why yuri did it with noona and that is personality and how they made them feel. mooyeong did not make junseo his center but yuri and sunwoo did with the people they liked and that is why they are spiraling . one in rage and the other into depression.

what i also find interesting is that the injury sunwoo has is one on the hand. what makes this interesting is what a hand does is grab on to things . a hand emits a start as in hand shakes , it holds on to and lifts a person , and also puts out the emotions one is feeling either on themselves or others. so in having his hand injured sunwoo is basically trapped. he cannot in metaphoric ideas pull himself out , nor can he go on to express any other emotions because not only is his injury onto his hand physically but it is also emotional in that it is hands the acted upon yuri and marked him as the brother in law when he knew he wasn’t , so his hand is both what ties him to yuri , drowns him in the past and stops him being able to heal.

characters that can be imposed upon another through both stories

yohan and yuri

mooyeong and sunwoo

junseo and brother in law

noona and yohan’s brother

yohan and yuri are not just the main characters , they also both go through an arc of bewilderment , self-loathing , and isolation. they are both haunted by their actions, yuri in how he has been behaving around his noona , and yohan how he has around mooyeong. with his noona yuri latched on to her kindness and made into his life in that it is the one thing to which he couldn’t be angry at because it gave to him without demanding but at the cost of him not being able to form other relationships purely because he locked his noona into an image of something for him. but yohan instead of that had to drag out his insides and put them into their place. he had to learn that what he knows is not enough . that what he has seen of himself in view of his family does not make him , nor does his brothers pain belong to him as he has been cared by him. yohan strikes back and decides to evolve, yuri decides to drown and devolve

mooyeong and sunwoo are both teachers , sunwoo teaches geography and mooyeong tutors. they both have unrequited loves but what they do with it as i’ve mentioned before is quite different. one can assume that both lack the character to act with big gestures and that is why they both lose out on their loves. but if you look at mooyeong i dont believe that he is an overly emotional character in that unlike sunwoo he does not add romantic gestures to the idea of teaching and by this i do not mean that he is going on talking about love within his teaching but he has these big ideas of what students are like and how diverse they are and how troubled they maybe. mooyeong keeps his head on pushing his students academically and he does feel but he does not center himself around the bursts of emotions he does feel. instead he reason with him because he knows that a love that isn’t spoken is better than a love that is spoken and then mocked / spurned and thats his struggle with yohan at first. while sunwoo is basically of the measure that a love unspoken / unreturned puts a hit on a relationship . it ends it and does nothing but makes it painful and he keeps wanting to run away from what he had unlike mooyong and it something that cuts him because its a mark that says i was wrong , i am wrong and i will keep being wrong in many sense.

now junseo is the kinder of the two. he might be a bit careless, a bit naive and clueless , but he does not insert himself into mooyeong’s life beyond the areas of the club and common decency. he isn’t like the brother in law who keeps trying to put himself into sunwoo’s life from the calls to the mention of a gift and him asking him for help. he feels that his place isn’t to force a way into mooyeong’s life and be a door that keeps opening letting him in and then kicking him out and i think its part of the reason why this relationship was able to grow out better than that of the one sunwoo and the brother in love have. also the brother in law remembers everything wrong about what happened between them and it something that breaks sunwoo under the issue of him thinking himself important but realzing that he wasn’t really anything because even friends remember things they did with another. it enforces the idea that the club and sunwoo were but things to collect and play around with rather than value and hold with respect as junseo and mooyeong. he kind of tagged on top of sunwoo without the consideration of exactly what was required between them because as he came by the club by chance so did he sunwoo.

With hyung and noona its a story of two people who are both the catalysts for the traits a characther decides to possess. From jealousy and agony in yuri, to fear and learning in yohan these two are the parental figures they never had but also become the ones they give up a lot of themselves for. Yohan decides to be the opposite of his brother and go after unrequited loves for others, yuri feels guilty for being so attached to his noona he has to isolate himself because her happiness should have been his as her kindness was his. If not for the conversation hyung and yohan had after being caught in his intimacy with mooyeong I don't think yohan would have really put aside his brother's pain and take a full leap into his relationship. Where on the other hand always being with noona and thinking her as a small little thing who got eaten up by a big bad wolf and having to converse with someone who doesn't really express their own feelings has kept yuri from really evolving and thats why he crashes against sunwoo so badly because even his first sister and her aggression is a mask out of what their parents have made them.

Now I love thar yohan has his dreams and yuri the train tracks. What the dreams show is that yohan is looking inside himself and is changing. The dreams symbolize his faults, from his ego on the surface hides a low self worth and mooyeong always becomes his consciousness which fires back at him as both the face of the wanted and his failings to achieve it because he is at a loss of self because he thinks to what he witnessed than what has to be.

The train tracks are a slow way of travel. The train goes and stops and you can only follow it. Yuri's facing sunwoo decides that this is his destination. That the pathway to his own salvation is the man he crashes into to seek the falling of his rival. The crash reassembles into guidance and guidance into freedom and so he drops the rope and build a slow way for him to reach peace. Also unlike yohan he has to look outward instead of inward

So this gas gotten really long, and so i say goodbye here until later when I have more to say and more time to do so.

#for your love #form of sympathy #*CREATORED.

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morrigansmuses · 4 years

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3 Golden Rules.

On Ethical disappointments.

I was raised to be tolerant. To consider the views and opinions of others, to keep and open mind. I was a social outsider (homeschooled due to racism in the local school.) I vowed I wouldn’t ever exclude people for being different to me or having different values. I was desperate to make and keep friends. More than anything.

I was 15 in the late 1990s. Lonely as hell. I decided that I would befriend absolutely anyone who would have me. Essentially anyone who wouldn’t beat me up on sight for being foreign.

I decided that I had 3 and only 3 dealbreakers in terms of friendship.

RULE 1. They couldn’t be cruel to animals.

RULE 2. They coudn’t sexually abuse children.

RULE 3 They couldn’t be a card carrying Nazi.

If anyone in my life did any of those things I couldn’t associate with them anymore. But barring that I would try to accept them as individuals.

Thats a pretty low bar right? I mean how could anyone fail to meet those insanely low standards?

See back then I didn’t know that shades of grey existed. I knew in theory that we were all imperfect beings, but I didn’t know what that meant yet in reality.

So I began to make friends. With normal kids. Actually probably nicer than average kids because they were sweet and sensitive enough to accept me for who I was when no one else would.

So the first hurdle I came across was that some of these people I was friends with enjoyed hunting. They would say for meat. I get that. Better than factory farming right? less cruel, less wasteful.

“You shouldn’t eat meat unless you’re willing to kill it yourself” They’d say virtuously.

But then I saw them in action. Delighting in the act of killing in a way that I knew wasn’t healthy. Laughing at the kid goat’s head bursting in a shower of gore or the way an animal screamed upon being shot. Killing more than they needed… That’s an impulse I don’t believe humans should engender in themselves.

But it was for food. Right? So I overlooked it and silenced the voice in my heart.

One day my best friend shot a stray cat with his bb gun just for the laugh. It didn’t kill the cat or anything but the animal yelped and ran away. I was so upset and shocked that I burst into tears and it all came pouring out. Was he training himself to become a sociopath? I asked him.

He apologised. He never did anything like it again. He was very kind to animals, especially cats, ever since and doesn’t hunt them anymore for any reason.

I forgave.

That’s the first time I remember compromising a core value. It was like a tooth being pulled from my 15 year old head.

I don’t regret it.

We’re still best friends.

The second hurdle that started to crack my young heart was the undeniable fact that in the early 2000s almost every guy I knew in his early 20s had a girlfriend between that ages of 12 and 15. NEVER OLDER. I can’t stress this enough. They would vomit in disgust at the thought of a crone of 18 or 19. They were also VERY vocal about their desire and right to have sex with children after a few drinks. By the time I was 20 I knew I had aged out of the 20s dating pool. I wasn’t attracted to older men.

No matter. I’m asexual and prefer platonic relationships anyway.

To this day I’ve never had a romantic relationship with a man. Because once I realised that Rule 2 wasn’t one any of them could keep, the trust was broken.

It wasn’t only men either. My closest girlfriend was a 26 year old substitute teacher who fucked one of her 15 year old students on a drunk night out once…

So they both had fun and boys that age are up for anything right? I mean. He probably still boasts about it today…

Right?

Plus… She was all I had. Like the only one I had at the time. I was so scared of losing her.

I turned a blind eye and ear. I tolerated. I didn’t have to approve of their teenage girlfriends did I? After all there were so many of them that if I cut them out of my life I’d have no friends ever again. Because the whole of society looked like them…

Thats the truth.

People in my extended family have dated 17 or 18 year old girls and encouraged them to drop out of school to have their children. People I love have done that.

I once knew a handsome, intelligent and charming man. He was dating a family member for a few months. He often defended the right of adult men to date teens. “Girls mature more quickly than boys.” He’d argue. Everyone would agree. After all hadn’t my great grandmother been 12 years old when she met my great grandfather and married him on her 16th birthday (with parental permission)? He was in his 20s. Just a boy himself surely? “We all know what children boys in their 20s are right?” Said my Mother… Whom I love very much.

Excuses were made.

Years later I discovered the the handsome, intelligent and charming man had been raping a 6 year old the entire time we’d known him. He is still wanted by the police today.

My father tells that when he was a boy of 18 back in the 70s he had kicked an older German man, a respected family friend, out of his car because the man had asked him to pull over, he had something important to tell him. When he did so, the man said that the Holocaust was a myth. An exaggeration, a Zionist hoax.

My Father was dating my mother at the time. She’s Jewish. So is his uncle, a Holocaust survivor.

He yelled at the man not to talk shit and made him walk home.

I am not my father.

The first time a Holocaust denier (a respected local businessman) voiced their opinion to me I froze. Then laughed. Surely he must be kidding... I argued briefly before realising that he’d made up his mind.

My well meaning people said I’d made a mistake. It was my job, they said, to change his mind. To educate him. Otherwise how would he learn?

I didn’t speak to him again but I still nod at him in the street because he employs a few of my friends and I wouldn’t want to make things awkward for them.

And also I don’t want him to yell at me.

I have worked with Holocaust survivors and have survivors in my immediate family and I still nod in the street at a Holocaust Denier because we are raised to be polite aren’t we? Let’s not make a scene.

We’re mature adults.

Aren’t we?

People are starting to turn weirder than they used to be. Politically.

My Leftist friends are in a secret facebook group... Strenuously defending China’s Uyghur genocide because Communism can do no wrong… And at the same time saying all the Israelis need to be killed for what they’ve done to the Palestinians. One suggests a biological weapon tailored to Jews.

My Centrist friends are suggesting we “Hang up democracy for a while” in order to combat global warming and welcome a global police state and stop “kicking off” about our rights all the time. “Maybe we need a jackboot up the arse” one of them says.

And the ones that aren’t on the Left?

My facebook feed these days is getting awfully full of Rothschild memes.

“We own every bank in the world and funded both sides of every war since Waterloo.” They say, next to a grinning caricature of Jacob de Rothschild. Reminiscent of a Nazi cartoon of a “Rat Jew.”

Even a hedge fund billionaire prick doesn’t deserve that, does he?

I don’t comment. What’s the point? They’ve watched all the youtube and don’t read history books on principal.

My Brother is getting into Qanon. So is my Sister in Law.

She follows the medical teachings of a man who thinks the Jews invented Chemotherapy to kill the Germans after the war. Apparently he is becoming more and more popular.

Eccentrics.

Thats all.

I’m half Jewish. Like My Brother.

One of the Survivors I know said that 3 weeks after the Nazi propaganda came into the school he attended, he was in Bergen Belsen and half his family was dead.

His neighbour was jealous because his father had 2 more cows than he did.

I hear Marine Le Pen is neck and neck with Macron to win France.

A good friend of mine said it's because by 2030 Muslims will outnumber white people in Europe. He won’t read the articles I send him. But he sure sends me a lot of YouTubes.

I ignore them because I don’t want to hate him. Maybe he ignores my articles for the same reason.

Hey 15 year old me…. You, skinny thing with the ethics, the braces and black eyeliner…

Those compromises I made were made out of love... And also fear.

Please stop looking at me like that little girl.

“It’s true” writes my friend. They’re trying to breed us out. It’s all an elite Zionist plot.”

I close Whatsapp.

Here I go again I guess…

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some-bitch-named-destyni · 7 years

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his name....is not finn.

at like 2:40 a.m. i meet a guy on grindr. this guy hits on me in the typically angry and abrasive fashion i have designed my profile to solicit from men of a certain variety, and so we get to talking then wind up on camera, me expecting the same shit as usual....in between midnight meeting with strange men in unknown and unsafe places, i get my need to self destruct and overcome the mind numbing boredom of sociopathic lack of fear satisfied by getting even more men off over the internet on camera... and then, last night happened.

his name, is not finn.

its robert. but he gies by finn. finn has four les pauls, recording machines...the works an entire worling fucking studio. lives in middle tennesse but has been to atlanta many times bc HE ACTUALLY PLAYS MUSIC MIDTOWN EVERY YEAR SINCE 2013 im watching the shit behind him on camera, the house hes in, the guitars on the walls, the records hanging around the cords and amps and pedals... and hes alone. he lives alone, its his place. FINN IS 23. thats all. 23. he got into it all, along with a little band that came from Knoxville tennessee in 2009 named 10 Years...who if u follow rock, u have to know. this is a massivelt succsesfull mainstream alternative rock act. one of my favorite bands.

so here we are.

its five a.m. were still talking, not fucking.

about music and art and finns ideas on sexuality not being real.

odd for someone whos telling me they wanna grudge fuck me bc i have extintential philosophers words tattoos up my arm, and then jump from a well worded rape fanatasy back to intellectual artistic expresssionary approach debate and metjod, use, deploymwnt methods and how they more prolifically provide correct walls of sound they assail the sensations of emotions in pattern sufficient to stimulate a response.

and were talking, then its almost six.

finn has to leave for "work" soon.

hes recording one of the three bands he plays in this a.m.

here i am, on cam talking like were actually getting to know, and enjoy knowing who each other are, with this man

a sound engineer for 10 Years touring company.

Actually. what the actual fuck is happening right now.

he looks like youd expect, having seen these guys on t.v and all, hes tall...6'1 not super tall but taller.

hes stocky and has bushy curly short hair and a clean face, complete with black shirts, wrist bands, leather vest/whatever material that is... the typical rock guy look. and youngish. p young looking yeah.

and i could see it all his house was fucking unreal the shit in that house, the music, drum sets . bass processors, computers studio monitors mic stands... and just i forgot about itnall speaking to him for three and a half hours bc he thinks so fucking different from anyone ive met before him. completely challanges every basic assumption of society that he can.

but then has the self discipline to make this all happen by his age. has the real world common sence, the extraverted thinking to handle the nessesary tedium that makes it possible for this creative energy to become something, and be used and marketed and produce a way to live for himself.

he confounds me sideways. these two opposite people, one part myself, one part my opposite???

i almost tell myself he wants it worse then i do, but thats not it, it cant be it. id die for it.

i would do anything. id give anything, go anywhere, crawl to china. id lose anything, live anything, repeat this entire awful miserable unbearable horrific life ive had three times for it.

id do anything anything id go to the ends of the earth id forsake anyone, id suffer any loss to get just a moment of chance

a moment a single opportunity is all id need and i would light a fucking fire so large it would blind everyone involved.

so yeah i want this sound in my head out, and onto an album just as bad as him or anyone so its not that he wants it worse.

so what then? why is this kid able to be me, and then some...and also not be me enough to actually be living the life he is already?

is it bc its not real? is that it? make me feel better. tell me that i am valid since im tragic enough to

have this incredible talent and yet at the same time have it come from something inside so FUCKED that having it means never being known, never heard, never shine bright like the fact of my creative passion could, and be unlived, then die never having spoken to the world like i should have could have would have

bc im valid so. bc im better. make me feel better. tell me its bc i am REALLY fucked. not pretend fucked for the sake of fashion in rock. not forced or mimiced or copied. and thats what he is right bc if not he wouldnt be well enough to make this happen.

but then, i know its a lie.

i wanna believe it, but i know its a lie. a beautiful, perfect lie. bc i know if i got the part out of the way that cripples me, id still have the rest to write from and create from. and still be capable of what i have been since birth.

so...im lazy? am i lazy? internally, mentally lazy? like or just for aomeone who loves to take pride in their pain, am unable to take the pain of change inside that facilitates the construction of a life like finns... what is it? do i just watch finn now and wait for a secret thats never coming?

I HAVE A DREAM. A NIGHTMARE. ALL MY LIFE I HAVE HAD IT OVER AND OVER. IN IT I AM 70 YEARS OLD , THO ILL NEVER REALLY MAKE IT TO THAT AGE, THE IDEA REMAINS THAT MY LIFE HAS COME AND GONE AND IM GREY AND WRINKLED AND LIEING DOWN AS I GASP FOR BREATH AND THEN I SEE AROUND MY BODY FROM ABOVE

im alone. poor. broke. in beggars clothes. in the gutter, in the filthy city streets, in the cold in winter. im that homeless decay you pass for the smell and then i die there. and thats it. thats what i let happen. i let this go on unti, i ran out of time to change it, and i never did a rhing. never made it, never finally got the shit insode out, never began to burn bright, never started playing live, never recorded, never anything. the thing inside i have that i alone see the magnitude of, and would only have ever really shown to anyone through true sucsess, it never MEANT A F U C K I N G T H I N G A T A L L

now in this mornings call with finn, i begin to see that dream take shape in my reality. soon. its creeping with an slythe above its shoulder just behind me. im here alone like this. deluding myself that this little computer screen is somehow a substitute for a real relationship, delluding myself that i actually am this sad imaginary projection i want to be lercieved as in this fake little digital world. making due with this as if its even happening for real . as of anyone or any idea on this small machine in my lap is life, or love, or me, or actual.

but here where my body is, where i cant take a good picture of me to hide my age, where my personality disorders are, where i am weird and different , where i am an addict, where i am unconventional and do things others wont want near them bcmof the risk i bring to myself, where my body is. my real body .... here there is not a fucking person with or like me. i have some temporary help as i stumble foolishly through my fucked circumstamce from my family, that ofc is going aay everyday, as that nightmare i mentioned begins to take shape. bc they gonna die before me unless i take my death into my oen hands and then that nightmare i have will have shaped fully and begin looking me in the eyes.

so, here i am. 10 a.m.

fuck this guy.

hes sexy, he wants me, and hes my type as in in another life serious boyfriend material . no kids, no phobics, trans or homo, no issues seeing me as who i am, and then also my creative and intellectual counterpart. and hes not very far like a w hour drive. and alllllllll so it makes it feel odd bc he seems like the worst thing for me, that only this situation would develope the addition of feelings have no room for amidst my chaos... i need to be LESS in romance with ppl not fucking MORE... or have someone else establish those feelings for me either just either way..bad idea. and so fuck him

mean it fuck this guy.

fuck this finn, robert whatever and fuck his life

fuck his guitars.

like i needed this shit? i needed to see this? needed to know him? or to have him that, weird weird convo for that long ...the longest ive spoken to someone new in years at once , and not even wind up wanting me for a nut before he got off the vam etc... just fuck this shit.

but not that it seems like that with him, im a combo of not romantic at all, and already emotionally spoken for HARDCORE by aomeone i am trying and fightimg with all i can to stop, STOP being romantically attached to.. so.. no new fucked romance crap for me please. i mention it bc it seems like what happens to me usially, and for no other reason then that.

but as for what i am SURE OF WITH FINN..for tnat... F U C K him

reminding me that im more then shit, reminding me that im throwing away things thousands of people never get to have or would kil, to be able to do like i can. remininding me that im more then this 4 a.m. methamphetamine induced desperate attempt to distract myself from throwing myself away, and relive the pain again, once more, one ,ore gimme one more time always...always need one more sex session where i live out how my father never loved or accepted or appreciated me in my own head again, and keep that defining pain in Clear FUCKING FOCUS FOREVER. KEEP IT HERE. KEEP THAT PAIN HERE. RIGHT IN MY ARMS, CRADLE IT, CLOSE TO MY CHEST, CLOSE TO MY HEART , EMBRACE FEED NURTURE IT GROW IT, LET ITS POISON VINES GROW INTO MY SKIN AND FEED ME FILTH HAPPILY, always one more man, one more moment of disrespect, one more instamce of debasing myself to remind me why i ket myself almost die in a hospital last winter, why ill be sleeping in the cold wind again before spring, and why ill never walk right again or run at all. why im this old and sti,, here, remind me why im trapped by my that talent im so thoughtlessly wasting daily, and...

finn reminds me. fuck him.

he reminds me im doing it , in at least part, by choice.

he takes my excuse away. takes away my escape.

lies, inside lies, inside lies..... finn shows up at 3 a.m. when ur only awake to do things like throw away potential of this magnitude and destroy your human body.

invades my momemt of distraction from the truth of how responsible i really am for this now, and reminds me that

its still out there. the chance i wanted, the opportunity to get the music out and realize that potential ratner then become that 25 year nightmare i have in my future currently...

tne hope, the possibility, the chance to burn finally

burn bright like a star, and shine so hard i can be seen for miles and miles by millions of people

its stil, out there.

fuck finn. i didnt need to remember that.

bc i am what i predict, i am what i know i will do. i am what i will and i dont have that other thing he does. common sense, extraverted thinking, strength to rid myself the demons so i can at least get it going. i dont have it, and im to terrified to let go the crutch ive found that gets me by with the maniac mind i carry and endure. i am not him, and i can not gather the strength to face the world without my crutch so i can then rise to the talent i toss in the trash more each day. i wont even consider it. its all ive got here. its all ive found through all this bullshit life thats made it even half way tolerable. and weather for my own better, weather i be to weak to sacrafice, weather i be to cowardice to dare to even attempt, or be to patnetic to for once FOR ONE TIME TAKE SOME PAIN FOR MY BENEFIT RATHER THEN MY DESTRUCTION.... even if its all true and i am very very responsible for how this hapoens here...

its ok.

bc that just makes me real right? and ive got that. and ill have it now, the rest of the way, to finish the ride,

all of the ride. ill have it. the truth, il. have that i was so cursed and gifted by the same thing that it overcame itself in me

and il. have that genuine authenticity, il. have that close as i finish this ride. the rest of the way.

all of the way.

all the

FuCkINg wAy DOWN

down down down down the only place im gonna go

and il. see finn from underneath, and everyone else who heard of or knew me from below

where i will burn in hell

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dinoblip · 7 years

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i found guardians of the galaxy vol 2 a bit shit

I saw it a little less than a week ago and I’m still disappointed.

I prefer to think of this post more of an “analysis” than a rant but itll probably be more the latter.

also these are all just opinions, if you liked it thats fine.

(spoilers ahead)

1. the writing

i mean i wasnt expecting it to be a masterpiece, hardly any sequels are, but the humour of the first film was 100% tied to the clever screen writing.

and here it felt like the writer was hamfistedly trying SO GODDAMN HARD to be funny and it never really seemed to land except in 1 or 2 scenes (the groot button scene and the scene where groot is explaining why he doesnt like hats).

This might just be my dumb sense of humour here, i know plenty of people who did find it funny but so many lines just left me cold or rolling my eyes.

An example is this fruit gag and the set-up is okay.

One of the first things nebula says in the film that she wants a piece of fruit which she is then denied because it isn’t ripe yet. This is fine, its humorous because of the casual tone of the question and the somewhat overly stern and ridiculous answer, the outright denial perhaps being because gamora doesnt want to be charitable to her sister at all. It works.

Then it gets reestablished: theyre now fighting people and the fruit is on the ground in the fray and nebula is still a prisoner. Now she asks Drax for the fruit and Drax yells over his gun “no its still not ripe”. This doesnt work quite as well cause it doesnt make quite as much logical sense and its basically the same conversation as before. So its not funny here.

Then the pay-off doesnt work because its too hamfisted. There is a reveal that nebula has managed to escape and now has a gun in one hand and the fruit in the other. That alone would have been a good pay-off because theres a sense of misplaced priorities, maybe simply because she kept getting denied it she went out of her way to bring it with her. I chuckled at that.

But then the script makes her triumphantly take a bite out of it, spit it out dramatically as if its disgusting and then explain “it wasnt ripe”. And they film it as if thats the punchline. It was too hammy to be funny, it seemed like such a waste of an opportunity.

Like they could have made it more understated like they could have stretched it out a little. Here’s an idea for what they could have done instead. Shes quite a proud character so her taking a bite in triumph fits her character fine but once she takes a bite, she smiles for a bit that sorta slowly turns into a bit of a grimace but continues chewing determinedly, her face a picture of disgust. that could be the end of the scene or it could continue by then having a ravager break the silence to ask if shes alright. she sorta manages to swallow it down but when she next talks her voice could be a bit claggy and constantly sounding like shes on the verge of coughing which would undermine her authority over the situation.

This is one of the few times they attempt a recurring joke and it doesnt work at all (off the top of my head i cant even remember one other one and the first film had so many). Other examples of failed jokes include pretty much all lines said by Drax who only seems to laugh manically and insult Mantis and nothing else including one which doesnt even work within his character (this one: mantis is watching all the raider funeral fireworks and she says that theyre beautiful and drax is staring at her and says “yes, beautiful” pause “on the inside” ITS ESTABLISHED OVER AND OVER THAT HE IS LITERAL MINDED SO WHY IS HE SAYING THAT). And I would also say that alot of the jokes with Groot aren’t very good either and neither is his character in this film but dont worry I’m gonna justify that in a second. I plan on giving him an entire fucking section.

So not only did the jokes not work but even the normal conversations felt stilted. And so often it almost looked like the actors werent sure of how they were meant to say lines in a way that would sound natural. Peter Quill wasn’t sounding like Peter Quill all of a sudden, Gamora didnt feel like Gamora.

It made for a confusing experience. I kept having to question myself for not laughing at a joke or feeling emotionally invested in what was happening. i ended up asking myself alot “this is a guardians of the galaxy film, why arent i having fun?”

2. the story

I freaking loved where they went with the character development of yandu and nebula (she and gamora are my favs) but it made me realise how mindless the main story is. The only thing i found exciting about the main storyline was yandu’s backstory and then his redemption AND THEN THEY KILLED HIM. SO WHATEVER. NEVERMIND. Just so they could have a tearjerker ending.

anyway back on track, the main storyline, starlord’s was pretty standard and you could see the fact that starlord’s dad is evil from the beginning, mainly cause he’s shown to be too cool and flawless at first which is a big warning sign. It was more just boring than anything else. Though the cg for Ego rematerialising in really disgusting ways was amazing. But thats hardly a substitute really.

It’s just: chris pratt goes to find father -> turns out his dads a planet therefore chris pratt is Special™ -> oh no his dads bad what a shocker and he’s wanting galactic domination -> now they gotta fight and they do.

Everything else (which is alot by the way, there is so much “everything else”) is basically unrelated except yandu’s story but even then he has this mutiny happening on his ship for a bunch of the film which has nothing to do with most things. And then after a bloodbath he ends up flying his own ship again so none of that mattered and any consequences of killing an entire crew (that you would guess would be around for some reason like, i don’t know, maintaining the ship so it can fly places) simply do not exist. And then after that up til the Big Fight, yandu, yandu’s right-hand man (cant remember his name) and rocket scream into the camera for a while while they warp through apparently too many warp points or something. cause it seems like they had to fill up 3 minutes.

Meanwhile Chris Pratt and gamora have romantic tension or something while he tries to come onto her and stuff and she isn’t into it and then her development is her coming round to him? She doesnt have any other story except being attacked by nebula sometimes and not doing anything in the Big Fight for some reason????? She and nebula fall off a ledge which they cling to for most of the fight while mantis does her mind-fuckery til she gets knocked out and then the dudes take care of it.

Rocket’s character development is mainly yandu telling him not to push people away and that he knows what its like to be in rocket’s shoes yadda yadda. so that gives rocket some time to be angsty cause they need to fill there angst quota somewhere.

like i said i did like nebula’s character development and her backstory but it wasnt really relevant either. it did flesh her out as a character tho.

my main issue with the story was there was an emphasis on these character subplots which ususally I’m all for. But if there was a main plotline which actually tied it all together then it would have worked. It was all well themeatically of having all these characters choosing their families over their bloodties. But having all these subplots almost occur in a vaccum away from all the other subplots AND the main storyline, makes for a really slowww film. in which once a scene ends, more often than not, you have to ask yourself “and what was the point of that”.

And also once you start giving fleshed out character development for the sake of fleshed out character development and not for the overall plot, it makes the fact that some character’s weren’t given this treatment all the more apparent.

Like Drax, in the first film he was a very well developed character. But as i said earlier, literally all he does in GotG2 is laugh alot and tell mantis she’s ugly.

and then there’s groot’s character develop- HA NO

3. GROOT

there is no character development for groot because groot has no character.

groot has ceased to exist and a vacuous void has been been put in his place. that is the only explanation i can come up with for the way he is depicted: he died at the end of the last film, his consciousness vacated his body and then when he was being regrown, no consciousness was left to get put into it.

look

i really dont like being pandered to and here marvel was clearly pandering to anyone who thought little stick groot dancing at the end of the first film was adorable. and i did, obviously. who didnt? but when you try to replace character and motivation with cute, it wont work.

he is dancing and when he’s not dancing he’s misunderstanding information or being near useless in battles. All while he has that creepy vacant smile is on his face.

the camera freaking loves this idiot. to the point that the title sequence just has him dancing to mr blue sky while looking straight into the fucking camera, WHILE A WHOLE FIGHT IS HAPPENING AROUND HIM THAT I WOULD MUCH RATHER SEE.

for one thing, its an injustice to mr blue sky. that shits my jam.

for another thing, there is no music playing within the scene, its non-diegetic. so why’s he dancing?????

in the first film it makes sense cause not only cause the music matters to starlord but also cause it is happening in the scene, he’s listening to it on his headphones and it goes away when he takes them off. it also serves for conveying his character. and also the cinematography is great:the sweeping camera moves and visual gags really make you excited for the film to come.

Here, not only does it not make sense for him to be dancing as there’s no music, it also doesnt make sense for him to be dancing in the middle of a battle or dancing for a camera that he knows the presence off (this aint no 4th wall breaker or it shouldnt be). also the cinematography sucks cause hes too fucking small now so if you go for a wide shot you cant see the fucker. and also youd get distracted from his dancing because of all the action thats happening and WE CANT HAVE THAT. And the animation is good (i mean of course its good its fucking marvel) but they went so out of their way to kid-ify him that his arms and legs are really quite small compared to his head. Which would be fine, but with a dance-number, big arm and leg movements feel very small and don’t match the big music. I really felt a disconnect between what i was seeing and the music i was hearing. it didnt fit (while in the first film it so totally did).

the biggest issue i have with it is that it prioritises the wrong character. it prioritises groot when groot doesnt even have a semblence of a story. he does 2 things in the whole film: unlock a cage and carry a bomb for a little bit (because they realised that he wasnt doing anything so they threw him a bone).

then youve got the other characters getting introduced by telling him off for dancing. which is fair enough but it introduces them as sticks in the mud which is a weird way to introduce the main characters of a Fun Quirky Comedy film.

like i watched this opening and not only got annoyed at how long it felt but i also genuinely thought “oh i guess this is a groot film”.

I cannot even begin to explain how much could have gone wrong for me to think that.

I kinda hope the 3rd film (which you can bet your ass Marvel is making right now) is better or at least maybe not as rushed cause i did love the first film and it would be a shame for it to get chewed up in the haste to make make as much money off it as possible before it becomes irrelevant.

C’mon James Gunn. you’re better than this. Sometimes.

P.S. the gold people lol

#guardians of the galaxy vol 2 #personal #text #analysis #i hope #long post #real long #ive only seen this film once so if ive misremembered stuff i apologise

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