#rose is one of my favorite re female characters

[mandofury]

Just finished watching the full gameplay of Shadows of Rose DLC and wow, it's truly amazing. What I really fell in love with was the father daughter realtionship of Ethan and Rose. It was beautifully well written and as someone who also had never got to meet their father (mine died before I was born) the scenes between Ethan and Rose was more then beautiful. I fought back tears watching their scenes.

Ethan truly is a wonderful father, even if he couldn't be there in person he still watched over Rose and protected her. His love for his daughter, his family is forever everlasting.

Overall I have to say Capcom did a fantastic job with this DLC. The action, intense moments, and scares made for a wonderful experience but at it's core is the bond between father and daughter. Which in my book was something that was beautifully well done.

[snailsgoingdowntown]

Help, I Reincarnated as the Female Lead's Sister in Law!

Re-upload due to complications.

Chapter 1

Dion x Fem! Reader

Warnings: possible yandere themes, arranged marriage, toxic relationship, slight incestual themes due to the content of “Roxana,” blood, mention of murder

Nsfw warnings: Lost of virginity (both parties?), fingering, oral (fem receiving), spit, reader does NOT get to finish, vaginal pain, HEAVY DUB/CON.

Disclaimer: I do NOT condone any of the harmful and dangerous actions/behaviors that takes place in this piece of fiction. These actions/behaviors should not be normalized or romanticized as they are extremely toxic and dangerous.

Minors/blank/blogs that don’t reblog fanfiction dni and don’t span like my posts or you will be blocked.

Overall story summary: you reincarnated into one of your favorite novel-turned-webtoons. However, you didn't want to become the female lead's sister-in-law...

Word count: 4542k

===

“The Way to Protect the Female Lead’s Older Brother,” also known as “ROXANA” was a rather dark novel that was adapted into a webtoon. And as luck would have it, the webtoon wasn’t finished, and you don’t remember all the details of the fan translated web novel you found online.

Now, why would that be a problem? Simple:

You reincarnated into it. Not as a main character, or even a servant to one of the families. You weren’t a child of Lant’s or one of his many wives. You weren’t a friend to one of his children, either. Instead, it was worse than most of what was listed.

Whatever God you managed to piss off had a silly little, petty revenge plan that was straight out of a third-rate horror novel with teenage girls fawning over it. And truthfully, if written right, the non-existent novel would have been a banger – but no, instead it was anything but. Or maybe you only really think that because of your position in this world, where your birth was simple, but painful for your mother, and you were lucky enough to be born into a family that loved and cared for and about you.

It was a noble family, to boot. Wealthy enough to live a comfortable life. Two siblings – an older sister who was already married at the age of thirty with a child on the way. The other was a 12-year-old boy who made it his life mission to be the most annoying little piece of shit on earth.

But as you lay on your back, hands holding your nightgown in place, all you could think about was how small Dion Argece makes you feel. The wedding ceremony just finished up hours ago, and here you are, back pressed against silk sheets as your now-husband hovers over you.

(Name) Argece.

What a horrible name and cruel faith.

Inky black hair that falls into his carmine red eyes that held indifference. His wedding-tux was still on, even the outer jacket with the silly lone rose in his pocket. Oh, what a shame – to be married to such a handsome man only for him to be obsessed with his sister and emotionally unavailable.

God despises you.

“Close your eyes if you’re uncomfortable.”

He unbuttons his outer jacket, sliding it off his shoulders and tosses it to the side. You should close your eyes, you think, because his face was nothing but stone. Not even a condescending grin. He doesn’t comfort you, either – at least not in the typical sense.

“Keep still,” his gloved hands grab your thighs and you let him open them, creating space for him to get closer. You want to push him away and run. But what good would that do? Why couldn’t the man just slice something and claim that the blood on the sheets was from your first night?

“I’m scared.” You speak without thinking, becoming stiff as his hands traveled from your outer thigh to the inner, creeping underneath your nightgown. His gloves feel cold and uncomfortable, touch borderline rough. “I – I need a moment. Please?”

He tilts his head, giving it thought. After a moment he removes himself, but annoyance radiates off him. Your heart beats faster as the second’s pass. You remain on your back. The ceiling is painted white, no decorations and the room was bare saved for a dresser, closet, mirror and a random chair by the window.

You will be sleeping in here, from now on.

“Can’t do it? Then don’t.” he’s annoyed, surely, otherwise he wouldn’t look at you like you were an insect. What a wonderful way to start the newlywed life. But it’s not that easy to walk away, and while it sounds like he’s giving you a say-so, he isn’t; if you don’t consummate your marriage tonight, then…

“… I’m sorry. It’s my first time and I heard there would be pain.” You shouldn’t have to explain yourself. But Dion wasn’t exactly known for his… compassion. Or basic human emotions, either.

If this was someone else, would you be able to do it? Where did everything go wrong? This didn’t happen in the novel; Dion didn’t get married. There wasn’t a grand wedding with the Five Ruling Families in attendance. Nor was there a steamy scene with this man throughout the novel, not even in the side stories.

How did you end up here?

“Then relax.” If you weren’t scared of losing your life you would have run him over. It affects everything! Then again, it wouldn’t matter to him – this is a duty. Not something he wanted, you’re sure, and even if he did it would only have his best interests in mind.

“… I’m ready.” You don’t answer him, because it would only lead to a one-sided argument. Even a wall listens better. Despite your wishes, Dion does the same as last – settles in-between your legs, and this time, you close your eyes.

“Good. Try to relax or it won’t fit.” Your cheeks burn at that, mind already picturing how it would look. Many men say things like that, even in your old world. It’s just a thing they said, like with many things. It doesn’t really mean anything, because if it did then…

His gloves are still on, cold and grip tight on your thighs. You were hoping he would be gentler. But as his hands travel up and up until they’re pulling at the edges of your underwear to slide them down, you realize he won’t.

There’s no slickness down there, your underwear dry and vagina even drier. You peek through your eyelashes, watching as he inspects the article of clothing. He tosses it a few seconds later.

“I’m only going to ask once – would you rather keep your clothes on or off?” It seems that with every second reality just hits harder and harder. This was going to happen. Nothing could stop it. And if hypothetically, if he were to stop this, what then?

Even if he sliced an arm to fake the night, what about later? A baby, Lant wants Dion to have a child. No. You couldn’t do that to a child, especially yours.

“On. Please.” You expect him to just shove in a finger or two, watching as your body jerks in pain. Instead, he lifts your hips until your bottom was off the bed and flips the flimsy skirt up. And then there’s a glob of something wet and gooey, legs twitching as it lands on your bare cunt.

“D – did you just… spit?” steading yourself on your arms, you look on in disbelief as your husband just spat on your pussy. A string of saliva hangs from his tongue.

Instead of answering you, much less look at you, his thumb comes into play and spreads his saliva over the surface of your cunt. It’s only when his thumb swipes over your clit do you let out a shaky breath.

Maybe he was feeling generous or maybe he was curious. Dion decided to rub the twitching nub over and over until your legs twitch and cunt clenched around nothing. The glove made it uncomfortable, but even so, you just tried your best to focus on the pleasure. You weren’t sure if he would give you pleasure like this again.

“You’re enjoying this,” he retreats his hand leaving your twitching and needy clit lonely.

A pathetic whimper escapes as you watch your husband take his glove off with his teeth. This man is everything you fear and more, a character that you should have never met. Yet the sight of him lowering his head to lick a long stride against your slit has your legs shaking.

His tongue is warm and slimy, causing your hands to clench the sheets as your head falls back. Another lick and another until it’s flicking your clit back and forth, sending warmth throughout your body. However, despite the pleasure he’s giving you, his grip is still tight, almost painful on your hips.

Your heartbeat doesn’t slow down as he continues. Your fear barely dies down in your chest, even as the tip of his tongue teases your entrance. You shut your eyes tight, a breathless gasp leaving your lips as he thrusts his tongue into your cunt.

“It feels – “a pause as you catch your breath, “weird, it feels really weird and – “

Dion repeats the action until you’re a trembling mess, sensitive from your mental state and the current oral sex you’re receiving. It’s hard to focus on either one, your mind constantly reminding you that you’re in a novel, about to fuck a man who’s jaded and possibly has a thing for his sister –

“Ah… wait, that’s a lot…” he decides to go further, bringing his thumb back and rubs loose circles into your clit. He’s still eating you out, but not like a man starved like you read in erotic novels.

Even so, your husband keeps at it. If it was a good or bad thing was up for debate – on one hand, while it does feel good, everything is moving too fast, your pleas for slowing down falling on deaf ears. It really is a lot, tongue fucking you while those loose circles on your clit become tighter, rougher. Should you just lay back and take what he gives?

Your mother would probably say so. Your sister would just pat your head and smile like it was expected. Normal. Take what he gives, especially if it benefits you in any way.

“…?” your eyes open at his tongue leaving your cunt with a saliva trail, his eyes glued to your twitching sex. His thumb also stops rubbing circles, instead going back to grip your hip as your back starts to become sore. Your ass is still off the bed and if he keeps you hosted up like this, then you really will snap in half.

But then he locks eyes with you.

“I thought you were scared.” Dion doesn’t let you respond, either because he doesn’t care or because it would ruin the ‘mood.’ He latches his mouth to your poor, abused nub instead. And sucks.

“H-hey!” one hand supporting you while the other grabs at his hair, you didn’t expect him to throw your legs over his shoulders. “That’s enough, really, no need to – ugh…” his mouth was warm and soft, but it sends your nerves on fire.

Good. Bad. Good. Bad.

Good, bad, does it matter anymore?

He sucks harder and your fingers tug harshly at his hair. You kick your legs but are unable to tell if it’s from pleasure or the flight or fight response he’s causing you. He doesn’t budge, doesn’t bat an eye, making it his life mission to suck you dry.

“Ah – wait, Dion – “

It’s at your whine of his name does he finally, finally stop, a ‘pop’ when he detaches his mouth from your sensitive and bullied clit. Your husband decides to lick one last long stripe from your entrance to your clit, all the while making eye contact with you. Your chest heaves as your mind settles, arousal overthrowing your thoughts.

“What is it?” Monotone, his voice is monotone and he’s not even out of breath. Your mother lied, there’s not even a hint of pink across those cheeks. It’s fine, though – no, it’s not, it’s baffling how steady he seems when your back is about to break, and you can’t even breathe.

Your eyes travel from his to his hair, where your hand is still grasping the strands. Mind still catching up to your body, you let go and draw your hand back, covering your eyes with it. Your entire body is shaky and legs sore. You’re not used to this position.

“It – it’s enough.” Your husband lets you pull your legs back, feet pressing against his broad shoulders as you bring them back down. The relief is almost immediate, a pleasurable and relief-filled sigh leaving your chest. You allow yourself to rest for a bit, your sensitive cunt and sore legs screaming for it.

“… O – okay, I think, I think that’s fine. Excuse me…” gently, you pull one leg up until your foot is flat against the bed. With a shudder, you trace your entrance timidly with two fingers, getting used to the touch. You’re not sure of how big he was, but you’ll use three fingers just in case.

You gape like a fish when his hand reaches out, grabbing yours roughly. You didn’t even notice the dip in the mattress as Dion got closer on his knees, face inches away from yours. Oh God, now what –

“What are you doing?” clearly annoyed, Dion doesn’t let you look away – not that you were going to – free hand grabbing your face, pointer finger and thumb on each cheek. It’s barely loose enough to leave no bruises. It hurts regardless.

“I – I was… prepping…” part of you wants to pretend that this man doesn’t know how to comfortably prepare you for pentation with his… but you know better. Because an inexperienced man wouldn’t know how to do things with his tongue like that, or where the clit was because –

“Are you still scared?” The hand that was holding yours releases it, opting to sneak its way to your cunt. His fingers were larger than yours, nimbler as they stroke your labia minora. Are the shivers washing over you from nervousness or arousal?

“… I’m scared of the pain.” By instinct, you knew he meant more than scared of sex – if you feared him. Still.

It doesn’t need to be said.

“Scared of the pain?” His eyes glow in the moonlight, bright red with absolutely no emotion. “Why?” he doesn’t break eye contact as his fingers inch closer to your entrance, stroking the opening, making your legs jolt. What a horrible man.

You remind yourself that this man only felt fear as a child – and even then, it probably wasn’t for very long. Nothing lasts for long, in this estate.

“Because I hate it.” You don’t break eye contact either, breathing in when one finger slowly sinks in, your walls now stretching uncomfortably. It’s not as painful as you thought it would be, your wetness mixed with his saliva making it easier. Your nails are about to rip holes in the silk sheets.

Like a curious animal, he tilts his head, curling his finger. It doesn’t feel good, it hurts, but you endure it even when you wince. Dion decides it would be a good idea to spread your legs a bit further, and like a bug, crawls between them even more. You hiccup when he adds a second finger.

They’re bigger than yours, they reach deeper. In your old world, did it feel like this too? You can’t remember.

“It’s going to hurt worse if you don’t let me finish this. Relax your legs before it hurts worse.” Pressure builds in your eyes, but you fight it off. “Save your tears for when it matters.”

You’re tired of him already.

He doesn’t move them, at first. It’s almost like he expects this, because as you adjust to something foreign inside you, he starts to rub at your clit, again. Softly this time, touch firm enough to feel but not hard enough to hurt. Or maybe you’re lying to yourself because you’re wincing, still.

When he starts to thrust them in and out, you force yourself to look at the ceiling, scared to see the expression on his face. You also don’t want to watch the show, scared it’ll already be bloody. Just a bit.

“It’s tight.” He states it like it’s the morning news. “And wet.” Your cheeks burn with both shame and embarrassment, shutting your eyes.

“… ugh…,” groaning, your hand reaches out to grab his wrist. “It hurts, a lot.” You sit up, back against the headboard, avoiding your husband’s gaze. Unfortunately, by doing this, your eyes land on your messy hole, light blood on his fingers as he pulls them out only to thrust them in again.

“It’s normal. The more you resist the worse it gets.” You give up, letting him do as he pleases, shutting your mouth.

The fingering still hurts as the minutes go by, but little by little the pressure eases down and when he arches his hand, he hits something soft and spongy. He’s rewarded the sight of your head banging against the headboard once, shoulder tense as you bite your bottom lip.

If only you could see that look in his eyes.

“Here?” He repeats the action, faster this time. You only nod your head, lips ajar, tongue swiping over them. Your hips have a mind of their own, raising as the heel of his hand rapidly smacks against your clit with his thrust of his hand.

You’re half there mentally and halfway in heaven, momently forgetting just who was here with you, who room this belonged to, and your entire situation to begin with. “Oh - wait, it’s a lot but – “

A third finger is added, and it starts to sting again. Another wince, another groan, but your arousal helps to keep the pain to minimum. All three fingers curl to hit that special spot that makes you see blacked out stars and pussy clench. All the while light blood coats his fingers, a sight he’s already used to due to his lifestyle.

It’s only when he pulls his hand away completely do you return from the skies, a small layer of sweet coating your forehead. Your hands are shaky as you look at him, only to be drowned back into reality when you’re met with those red, indifferent eyes that glow brighter than the moon.

“If you’re ready, lay on your back and spread your legs.” He undoes his pants while saying this, scooting back to give you some room.

With a heavy heart, you do so, laying on your back and spread your legs. You were fine just moments ago, so why is your heart leaping out of your throat rather than staying in your chest? Maybe it was because of the pleasure, or…

You’re scared, again.

You don’t look when something fat and heavy plops onto your pelvis. You don’t look when he brings you closer by your thighs. You don’t look as he rubs the head of his cock against your slick folds, catching on your clit.

“Relax or it won’t fit,” he reminds you before pushing the fat head in. At first, it’s a sting no bigger than an ant bite. But then another inch goes in, and you feel like a sword is cutting you straight up open, your legs tensing and hands grasping his forearms in a futile attempt to stop him.

Your nails dig into his sleeves, and you can feel the skin underneath. The tears build up as your face becomes hot, taking in deep breaths like it would soften the intruding body part.

“Big – it’s too big, it’s not going to fit – “

“… You look cute when you cry.” It’s sinister, teasing and everything that makes your stomach drop. His thumb wipes away your tears that’s already staining your skin. But he stops regardless, if only to shut you up if nothing else.

You think a few minutes pass but it’s hard to tell when he’s still inside, pulsing and you could feel every vein on his cock. It’s thick, it’s big and you don’t think you’re equipped to handle it, handle him. He’s everything that ruins your sense of self, that makes your dreams shatter and fear rot you from the inside out.

But he’s your husband…

But he’s your husband.

“Relax,” he inches in deeper, slower this time, but not letting you get a word in. Your nails dig deeper, and if it weren’t for his shirt, you would have drawn blood. Another inch, another gasp that leaves you breathless, grasping for anything that could keep you grounded. The only thing you could grab was him, however.

“Dion, Dion, you’re going to break me, I can’t – I can’t – “

“You can. You have to.” Was his voice raspy, just now? If so, it worries you, because you just remembered one very important detail – Dion Argece was, if nothing else, a sadist. Be it from his childhood trauma, or if he would be like this regardless of, he loved seeing Roxana cried.

It never occurred to you that he would love seeing you cry, too.

How deep was he? It feels you’re being speared open, his cock bullying its way into your virgin hole. You weren’t a virgin in your last life, but it didn’t hurt like this. It had hurt, felt like you were being ripped, but not enough to make you cry and breathless.

You think you can feel blood trickling down your ass crack. “Please tell me you’re almost there, please…” sniffling, you look up at your husband, the man taking your virginity in the name of ‘marriage.’ A mirror shatters in the back of your mind.

There was a flush across his cheeks. Pupils blown wide and a small grin on his lips. He was enjoying this. Your pain, your tears and perhaps even your fear – he was enjoying this.

It would have been better if he didn’t feel anything, you think. Just a stone statue that was performing its task. But even monsters had emotions, you guess.

“I’m not. Just endure it for a bit longer – I’ll stop once I’m at the hilt.” Was he a liar in the novel? You think he was, otherwise, the overtaking of the Argece family wouldn’t have happened. Lant wouldn't be dead. But things haven’t followed the novel to a T – this was proof enough.

“You’ll stop? Like, completely? You – you took my virginity, so that should be enough. Right?”

You hate it when he keeps wiping your tears away. Or when he slides in even more, your blood coating his stupid dick. You hate it when he brings one hand to toy with your clit, granting you pleasure that was just overthrown by the smothering pain traveling up to your belly.

He doesn’t answer. And that was enough for you to rake your nails down the back of neck, drawing blood in return. He’s making you bleed, so it was only fair if you could too, right?

Deeper and deeper until his balls rest against your bottom and pelvic meeting yours. Surprisingly, your husband keeps his word, letting you adjust to the new feeling. It feels heavy. It feels like a heartbeat, like a rod that was stuck. It felt awful.

How long did it take you to get used to it, in the past? No longer than fifteen minutes max, right? No, shorter than that. Then again, it didn’t hurt this much, but that partner was more loving, more caring, gentler –

“Who are you thinking about?”

The question breaks you out of your daze. You blink, once, before you question him back. He only glares in response.

Panic fills you when he pulls out, pain still there, blood still trickling down. “Wait, you’re – “

“I’m what?” he pulls out until only the head remained inside. You try your best to ignore the bruising grip he has on your hips. You’re going to be sore tomorrow. If you survive this, anyway.

God, if you’re listening, please let this night end peacefully.

“B-big. It’s going to hurt, please don’t…” dragging your hands down from his neck to his chest, your fingers dig into his shirt.

“Hm. A shame, really; you still must give birth, eventually. It’s better to get used to it now than later.” Your mind doesn’t catch up with your body, legs tensing when he slides oh so carefully back in, like he didn’t just push your worries aside like nothing. “Relax.”

“Dion,” hiccupping, you brace yourself, head nuzzling into his chest as your hold on his shirt tightens. When he pulls back out, you could feel every detail, every vein trail, his grith truly opening you. He graces you a mercy, going at a languid pace, minimizing the pain. His thumb never stopped rubbing your clit, either.

It goes like that, for a good while. Slow and steady, your hushed sobs dying on your lips, your husband careful with his thrusts, but not his grip. It was almost comforting, in a way. But you were still scared of him, and of what will happen after this.

“… I have a proposition.”

His hips stop and your ears perk up.

“You want me to stop, correct?” Dion pulls back until he’s on his heels, his cock dragging along your walls. You wince before breathing out. He doesn’t even try to hide the sadistic look in his eye as he sees the dried tear streaks on your cheeks. He almost grins in glee.

“Y-yes…” You don’t let go of his shirt. “Why…?” there’s hope inside you, but dread starts to rot it away.

“Jerk it.”

“…what?”

He was different from the novel. Extremely so, because you doubt that Dion would suggest a thing, much less give you a choice in the matter. That Dion would have either ignored you and this night or take you as is, no mercy, no humanity granted if this took place at the beginning at the novel.

When he doesn’t repeat himself, you pull yourself up until you’re resting on your knees. The sight of blood both on his cock and the sheets make you gag and thankfully, he doesn’t comment on it. Hesitantly, you take him into your hands, fingers barely able to close around it.

It throbs in your hand.

Your blood is coating your hands now, too.

Only silence is between you, your hands working him. Your thumb swipes over his head, circling it before stroking his dick up and down. Your other hand plays with his balls, massaging them. You’re not sure how long it would take him to finish.

Your core throbs in pain, and you become worried over the thought of peeing. It would probably hurt.

You want to sleep.

Without giving it much thought, just like your husband, you spit on it, a glob of saliva falling onto the staff. It throbs harder. And when you look at him, tired eyes and drool still dripping down from your tongue, still jerking him off –

“…Ngh…”

It’s almost cute, the way sperm spurts out and makes a mess on your hands. The very small and fleeting look of embarrassment on his feature is almost enough to comfort you. But when there’s barely a sheen of sweat adoring his forehead, unlike you was still recovering, you’re reminded that your husband was different from you.

There are no kisses, no sweet nothings shared between lovers. No stroking your hair or comforting your trembling form as your legs shake. Or even an offer to warm a bath for you, the warm water soothing your body. There’s none of that.

Not even a smile.

“Welcome to the Argece family, wife.”

Instead, all that awaits you is a restless sleep on a bloodied mattress with a husband who left after cleaning himself up.

Which God despises you so much and why?

[callmearcturus]

Mission Impossible: a Crazed Ramble by tentacledwizard

Re my mission impossible ask: gonna share my thoughts bc I just finished watching the series (sans 2 and 3) and boy do I have Thoughts. I think I’ll cover the ones I’m most interested in (Ghost Protocol, Rogue Nation, and Fallout) though I might ramble at u about 1 and 7 later lmao. So okay here we go

Ghost Protocol. I REALLY liked this one. This is 2nd on my ranking of MI movies.

This movie has the best team vibes. Might be my favorite iteration of The Team, even if Luther isn’t really there. I just got really emotionally attached to these guys and their interactions lmao..

I liked Brandt. Jeremy Renner didn’t have to do some heavy-duty acting for this role, and he didn’t. His role was to be small and cute and tormented, and it worked. So well that I mumbled “where is my wife” when I watched Fallout, and my brother looked at me strangely. 

Jane Carter holy moly. Dude you were NOT kidding about Jane Carter. I love her so much. I love how she’s not even slightly the love interest, how her and Ethan’s interactions have this respect and camaraderie, and even when they kiss it’s not romantic. It’s great. Loved how she got the dudely “gotta avenge my dead wife” backstory with her boyfriend getting killed, and how that propels her most ruthless actions. I guess I’m pretty much agreeing with everything you’ve said about Jane lmao. SHE’S GREAT. Also loved it when she fought Léa Seydoux, it was pretty cathartic. Let female characters be driven and reckless and (eyes Rose Lalonde pfp) yeah

Benji Dunn the man that you are. Okay I’d say that Benji is at his best in the next movie, but this is a damn good introduction. He’s newly promoted, a little bit out of his depth, and I’m a sucker for funny nerdy sidekicks okay. Gonna talk about him some more when I get to Rogue Nation probably.

Ethan Hunt has the best haircut in this film. Idk man that’s my Ethan Hunt commentary. Oh wait it was also funny when he wore the mustache

I GOT ALL FLUSTERED WHEN LÉA SEYDOUX WAS ON SCREEN. I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS IS. HOW PECULIAR

Didn’t watch 2 and 3, so the brief glimpse of Julia was very intriguing and bittersweet. Then of course in Fallout she Julias all over the place!

OKAY NOW I CAN TALK ABOUT THE BURJ KHALIFA

I’ve actually seen the Burj Khalifa irl and it is SO TALL (I know, very surprising) so I cannot wrap my head around the fact that this scene was shot on location (??) I need to look into that more.

I am a dork and I do not know much about how stunts and action scenes are calibrated, hence the sheer delight I derived from the way the camera moves in the Burj Khalifa scenes. Also my hands got really sweaty during the first half. (The “blue is glue, red is dead” part reminded me of “hasta lasagna don’t get any on ya” IDK MAN)

I spent the wall-climbing section gazing at the TV rapturously and occasionally mumbling “uh oh,” “Ethan Hunt: Human Gecko” or “the climberrrr” alternately. I literally was not hearing myself because I was watching so intently. My breath was BATED lmao.

And like I’d seen the gif sets, I knew he was gonna jump but I didn’t know when. So when Ethan does jump, it’s so sudden that you can’t help but go :O !! And it works. Anddd that’s my favorite stunt in the film (i am an easily impressed nerd with no technical knowledge but i AM dying on this hill. The Burj jump would impress ANYONE and for good reason)

I am replaying this scene in my head over and over. It’s just. It’s so good. My reaction to it reminded me of when I watched [S] Descend and it just Worked and I was amazed. To say nothing of Cascade lmao. Actually yeah this kind of is Cascade in a sense

I'm sure none of this commentary  is really original, but I really love it when Tom Cruise does a big jump heh. I am a simple man

So yeah this film is easily my 2nd favorite. It’s character-driven, there’s comedy elements, the way the team interacts and collides and argues with each other is wonderful. And I believe in Jane Carter supremacy.  

Oh yeah, Bogdan was funny too. So many good + funny moments here :D

Wait how could I forget the best character (the Russian man who has an enemies-to-friends arc with Ethan)? Love that guy.

OKAY this is too long so Im gonna separate this into 2 parts.

they sent three asks and then I responded, we're gonna use a cut here, LONG POST!!!!!

@tentacledwizard PART 2.

Rogue Nation. This one’s my favorite! I like how it begins not with Ethan but with the Team, because their interactions are good. And of course Ethan’s trying to jump on a plane. Just another Saturday.

I am not very good at talking about plot so let’s talk about Benji Dunn

ok wait first I gotta say that I like how they played with the usual IMF message. The “we ARE the syndicate” got me. Really good moment, and I bet if I rewatched it I’d catch all the little details that made me suspicious of whoever was talking. 

Anyway Benji Dunn.. the man that you are…

Like I said, Benji is at his best in this movie. There’s so many little moments that cement his greatness. He’s gaming on company time! He lies about not being Ethan’s friend on a daily basis :( also the sincere dorky smile he does on his way to the opera is so wonderful. 

I really like how sincere Benji is. He’s genuinely looking forward to the opera, and he’s eager to wear a mask someday, and he cares about Ethan so much. Yeah he’s a funny little British man but he’s also v sweet and you can see why Ethan goes crazy and kidnaps the prime minister to get him back. 

speaking of, I really think that Benji and Ethan’s relationship is… if not the core of the movie, it’s definitely a major part of that core. Does that make sense? Like, I tried to take a picture of the screen every time Ethan and Benji glanced at each other knowingly, and I ended up with a lot of pictures. Even with the 6-month separation (Ethan with a beard is something I never thought I’d see), they know each other. Ethan knows Benji wants to see the opera, and Benji will yell at Ethan when Ethan needs to be yelled at. Ethan compliments Benji’s tuxedo (as he should).

Also ffffuck whenever these guys worry about each other… like when Benji tells Ethan he’s probably going to take it too far one of these days.. Man. The scene where Ethan washes out of the giant torus with Ilsa and Benji goes to talk to him is so good.

oh and yeah Ethan did kidnap the prime minister. For benji. HE DID THAT!!!

Also the scene where Benji is forced to speak for Solomon was honestly incredible, it was like Ethan and Benji were having their own separate conversation with eye contact. When Ethan briefly put his hand on Benji’s shoulder, maybe to reassure him without having to talk, and Benji glances up at him… that’s good stuff right there. When Benji was finally able to talk it was cathartic. God I love these two

Plus the opera fight scene is so fun oh my god.

ok let’s talk about my queen Ilsa Faust

Ilsa Faust is great, and I really like how this series does female characters. Because she has her own shit going on, there’s a bit of romance between her and Ethan but they’re both agents with missions, and she’s never sexualized. I love that. Her signature move is filmed the way a male character would be filmed if he were fighting. That’s awesome.

I really loved Rebecca Ferguson’s performance here, the conflict between saving others and saving herself was neat. It’s also interesting how she has way less reservations about killing people, which plays off Ethan’s… everything. And she never makes it easy for Ethan, which I’d honestly do too if I was involved in the shit she has to deal with. 

But of course there are moments that show she does care about him (asking him to run away, the scene where she saves him in the underwater whirly spinner). The hug was pretty sweet.

Also, Ilsa is when I started really paying attention to the outfits in MI, because all of her looks were great. The yellow dress is iconic, and I REALLY liked the pleated coat she wears when talking to Solomon Lane. Plus the suit she wears in Fallout is Good.

Solomon Lane is a good villain. Jim is the MI villain I think of when I think of MI villains, but Solomon is very distinctive. I mean that voice, man. The VOICE. Lmao. He kind of reminded me of a parasitic worm made human, which is a 100% good thing.

So who has the more distinctive and weird voice? Solomon or Claire? That is the question. (I think it’s Claire tbh. Four am, four in the morning, four o clock)

So this is my favorite MI film. It’s fun, it has a good villain. We see Ethan’s personality start to shine through, too- he’s emotionally driven, as evidenced by when he fucking DOES ALL THAT TO SAVE BENJI GOD I LOVE THESE TWO. So yeah, this is the Ethan and Benji movie to me. It’s also a stellar debut for Ilsa Faust… wait what do you mean she gets fridged in the 7th movie. What do you mean

OH Jeremy Renner is still here! And more Luther! Hell yeah.

really want to rewatch this one so I can take more notes on the stunts and stuff, too

Ok time to make a part 3 because this is ridiculously long

PART 3

Fallout. Oh man. This one messed me up. 

So from the start, Fallout is a darker, queasier watch than the previous two. The more I watched, the more I realized that this movie Is Ethan Hunt’s Nightmare.

Like there’s the straightforward nightmare at the beginning, and then the film just Doesn’t Stop. It keeps messing with our minds again and again. 

This is the Ethan Hunt movie. This is our deep dive into Ethan Hunt’s mind, and at some points it kind of feels like a test of how well we know him- because he wouldn’t kill all those people, so this must be another nightmare, right? 

I am used to vivid nightmares, and this film perfectly captures the sheer horror of having one. And I was constantly doubting my own perception, bouncing between bad dream and reality along with Ethan. Man.

Like Mission Impossible has always kind of had that element, what with the masks and everything, but this film dials it up to eleven. I recognized the horror of Ethan’s situation here, and it was a feeling that stayed with me the entire time.

I mean at some points, it gets surreal. The line about Ethan literally being his own worst enemy (it’s true!), his wife showing up in little glimpses until she finally appears, Lane pinpointing Ethan’s fears, etc. When Ethan looks around at the church and says he’s terribly sorry, it’s such a small moment but it’s still kind of a gut punch. Ethan Hunt is trapped in his brain and so are we.

Even the title sequence shows everything burning around Ethan. The full theme song sounds like it’s going to end, but then it keeps going. This movie feels way more apocalyptic than any of the others.

Even Max is dead. I mean come on.

And we see how this screws up Ethan’s judgment, how his priorities are a little fucked in the grand scheme of things. He puts a few people over millions, for better or for worse.

Ethan Hunt running is an iconic part of the franchise, but what happens when all the messed-up stuff he went through catches up with him? What about the fallout?

So when the ending rolls around, it feels like Ethan is waking up, and that lends it a certain catharsis. But the uneasiness of most of the movie still stuck with me for a long time afterward.

Okay let’s talk about the new characters.

Alanna was neat, and I liked her outfits too. Though every time she flirted with Ethan, I had this vivid mental image of Ethan driving up and yelling “I fucked your mom, shit lips!” Probably something he’d say to Zola instead though.

Walker was such an asshole and that was kind of great actually. Not a single redeeming quality to be found. Have fun falling off that cliff, johnny boy.

Oh yeah and he got to say the only “fuck” in the entire series I believe. (It should have been Ethan. Well I can always hope.)

That conversation Ethan and Benji have about how Ethan won’t let anything happen to him, but then later Ethan does something that seems to put Benji in danger (making him be Solomon Lane)? Chef’s kiss. Also Benji FINALLY got to wear the mask, and he’s damn good at it.

More of Ilsa and Ethan’s relationship and man is it complicated haha. I like the scene where they’re walking through a symmetrical landscape, just paralleling each other, until finally they’re face to face. That’s good stuff right there. Also the scene where he’s in the hospital bed was sweet.

My wife [Brandt] is not here but luckily we get a lot of Luther. Luther is the constant in this series- he’s stuck with Ethan from the beginning, for better or for worse. (Better, because he’s a good character). So Luther really cares about Ethan, evidenced by his conversation with Ilsa. He probably knows Ethan better than anyone, except maybe Julia but then again she and Ethan have been apart for a while. 

Julia was great. The scenes with her and Ethan were v bittersweet. They still care about each other (just look at Ethan’s constant guilt over not protecting her), but she’s living her own life now. The conversation they had near the end was the culmination of all this, the moment we were waiting for. Plus I enjoyed her friendship with Luther, like I enjoyed Ilsa and Benji’s friendship. The scene where they’re cutting the wires/talking about Ethan was cute.

as for the stunts, hmm… I didn't really get the level of physicality I got from, say, MI1 or Ghost Protocol. Idk man maybe I’m just biased against helicopters?

ALSO I really like Face/Off and Hit Man so the John Lark thing was p cool to me. Ofc John was the asshole CIA agent though.

Anyway good movie, might take some time before I can rewatch it but it’s a masterful delve into Ethan Hunt’s mind. Not my favorite but also really really good and I wrote the most about it.

Conclusion. Wow that’s a lot of thoughts. Probably too many to put in one ask. Uh I kind of also want to talk about MI1 and Dead Reckoning as an echo of MI1 but this was a lot so idk if you’d want me to do that lmao. Anyway I have to thank you for convincing me to watch Mission Impossible all those months ago, because it is one of my obsessions now. (If you read all this I am sorry lmao, hope it wasn’t boring tho) 

And now I can finally read your Benthan fic! 8D hell yeah.

okay now it is my turn to reply

I frankly adore Brandt. I've joked to Brandt that I don't really ship Benthan, I just use it as a vehicle to write William Brandt and have him tell jokes. I adore his angry little bureaucratic ass. I am actually a fan of Renner when the material gives him actual shit he can do. Like, he was fucking WASTED in the MCU and the "Hawkeye" miniseries proves he could have been having fun this entire fucking time but they never GAVE him anything. And even if his role in MI is simple, McQuarrie is so damn good at writing characters that Brandt feels vibrant. In GP he goes from sad sweater boy to lowkey the weakest link of the team but everyone is there to help him. And in RN there's a THOUSAND lil moments I love with him. I always point to Benji's interrogation scene, there's a VERY VERY PRECISE bit of editing where Benji is going off on a tirade about how the CIA sucks, and the camera lingers on Brandt LITERALLY JUST LONG ENOUGH for Renner's mouth to make this tiny microexpression, like TWO FRAMES of Brandt indulging in admiring Benji's lie-craft.

Also the argument in the bigass car with Luther was Renner improvising according to McQ. Love it. Brandt's my angry little pencil-pushing angel. Any time he shows up in the PT AU, I'm 😍😍😍

GP lives and dies on the team dynamic tbh, which I find hilarious bc imo MI3 was pronounced dead on arrival bc the team dynamic is non-existent and like, why am I even here???? the chemistry is truly batshit.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE ALL THE TRULY MIND-BOGGLING FACTS BEHIND THE BURJ CLIMB AND HOW TERRIFYINGLY PRACTICAL IT WAS check out this post

Also Ethan's gorgeous LEAP at the end of the sequence is my second-fave Physicality Moment in that movie. The first is of course Ethan's silent vault over the railing after he leaves his prison cell. I'm a slut.

and I bet if I rewatched it I’d catch all the little details that made me suspicious of whoever was talking.

oh you want a fun one? in the record shop, there are two listening booths. ethan goes into the one on the left.

Solomon Lane is sitting in the one on the right.

re: Benji in Rogue Nation, I mean McQuarrie himself has said Simon Pegg as Benji Dunn is the beating heart and soul of the Mission franchise. so don't worry, we ALL stan.

ILSA FUCKING FAUST. /fans face. Yeah, the way MI handles women is like… I don't know how to go back to, like, James Bond films. I keep remembering Skyfall (which I remember as a good movie) and how one of the ~bond girls~ is casually executed and the whole point is how unfazed everyone is, how DISPOSABLE she is, how James Bond as a franchise wants backpats for pointing out "man it sure sucks how disposable women are in these spy flicks huh"

smash cut to Ghost Protocol, Rogue Nation, Fallout, and ESPECIALLY Dead Reckoning.

I keep saying this but MI manages to pull off the Metal Gear thing in that the Male Gaze of the camera is thoroughly bisexual. Long before we see Ilsa's amazing leg shot at the opera, we get a long lingering shot of Ethan's tiddies, and the way he's held captive is very female-coded, the position, the way he tries to wile his way out of it, the barefoot thing, all of it. There's such intense intentionality with how MI frames bodies.

Hell, I've been flicking between MI and the X-Men AU movies and comparing Ilsa to Mystique is super interesting because both of them fight with their legs-first. But the choreography of Mystique always has this "heh heh heh naked legg" feeling, while with Ilsa, her fighting style is so consistent, it feels like a natural result of her build and how she utilizes momentum. I remember there's a fast moment in Fallout where she very casually assists Ethan by taking out a guard as he extracts Alanna, and she does her leg flip thing. It feels Correct for her, rather than the MCU "make sure you fight pretty" bullshit.

Anyway I love Ilsa but Benji is actually the Love Interest in RN and we all know it.

"wait what do you mean she gets fridged in the 7th movie" SHE DOES NOT GET FRIDGED i am gonna die on this fucking hill, that Ilsa's death was good and actually meant something

Anyway I cosign all your thoughts on Fallout. I think it's the best movie and frankly I think it's a cinematic masterpiece. The claustrophobia of it, the nightmare of being Ethan Hunt, the repeated use of dreamlike imagery to convey that we're falling further into that nightmare with him, AND THE ENDING. I find the ending so bittersweet because yes, Ethan and the team pull it off, they push at the edges of possibility and reason until the universe yields and gives them the win

but then Julia says "I know you'll always be there" and its like watching a door slam in Ethan's face. He's always going to be in this dream/nightmare, a world that exists one layer removed from reality, and he can't get out. It's amazing. I want to kiss McQ on the mouth.

That Ilsa-Ethan scene was not in the original script and TC suggested it day-of and they just did it and its one of the most beautiful shots of the movie, with the green trees melding with the slight green tones of Ilsa's outfit and with Ethan's eyes. The fact they have an entire conversation between Ethan and Ilsa's eyebrows. I love them.

[ghoul-slime]

Ghouls & Their Favorite Horror Movies (1980s edition)

In honor of Halloween being just a few days away (!!!) have some thoughts about the ghouls and their favorite horror movies. Narrowed down to the 1980s because that's probably my favorite decade for horror (shoutout to the 70s though).

Dew: City of the Living Dead, The Evil Dead, Pieces, Cannibal Holocaust

Resident horror snob and ultimate gorehound. The bloodier, sleazier, and more fucked up the better. Huge fan of the Italian horror directors, especially “Godfather of Gore” and king of onscreen eyeball trauma Lucio Fulci. City of the Living Dead (aka The Gates of Hell) is his favorite, it’s gory, blasphemous, and just obscure enough for him to feel smug when nobody else has heard of it. The biggest horror fan of the group, he’s seen it all and is always on the hunt for something weird and new that he hasn’t seen yet (a difficult task). Introduced pretty much all of the other ghouls to their favorite horror movies.

Aether: Return of the Living Dead, Re-Animator, Night of the Creeps, Killer Klowns from Outer Space

Lover of all the best 80s horror comedies. Silly and fun without being too intense or mean-spirited. The more over the top the better. Aether movie nights are always the most fun. Loves Return of the Living Dead because of the awesome punk rock soundtrack and 80s punk aesthetic. Secretly loves horror comedies the best because he gets to see Dew laughing the whole time. He and Dew are the most annoying about quoting movies back and forth to each other nonstop.

Mountain: The Thing, They Live, Aliens, From Beyond

Loves his horror with a side of sci-fi. Major John Carpenter and Stuart Gordon fan (who isn’t). Also a huge fan of sci-fi horror with amazing practical effects and The Thing is the king of them all (he loves the original too, for the plant-man monster of course). 

Swiss: Hellraiser, Videodrome, Society, Street Trash

Body horror enthusiast. If it's slimy, horny, and taboo then he’s all about it. Unsurprisingly the biggest Cronenberg fan of the bunch. Huge fan of the Hellraiser series, what with all the leather and the chains and the flesh. Will also sit you down and force you to watch Society if you’ve never seen it (you will thank him later).

Phantom: The Monster Squad, Fright Night, The Lost Boys, Near Dark

Of course it’s gotta be The Monster Squad. Phantom loves the classic Universal Monsters and Monster Squad has them all, wrapped up in a super fun 80s horror comedy with great writing and memorable characters. Will undoubtedly yell WOLFMAN’S GOT NARDS at the most inopportune times. Loves vampire movies the most and secretly thinks of his pack a little bit like the group of vampires in Near Dark.

Aurora: Night of the Comet, Slumber Party Massacre, Phenomena, Sleepaway Camp 2

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS. Loves seeing pretty women absolutely kick ass onscreen. And any horror movie with a female villain will almost always become a favorite. Loves Night of the Comet because why shouldn’t a couple of valley girl cheerleaders get to enjoy a mall shopping spree while also mowing down hordes of comet zombies with machine guns?

Cirrus: Possession, Altered States, The Shining, the Ninth Configuration

Queen of psychological horror. Her picks usually toe the line between horror and other genres. Cirrus movie nights almost always have to come with a “palate cleanser” movie right after (usually a Cumulus or Aether pick). Dew secretly thinks she has the coolest taste of the bunch.

Cumulus: Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama, Blood Diner, TerrorVision

80s horror comedies (horny version). Like Aether, Cumulus loves horror comedies. But for her, the sexier and more ridiculous the better. Always thinks a movie would do better with more boobs and full-frontal. Vocal advocate for more male nudity in movies. Linnea Quigley is her horror idol.

Sunshine: Slumber Party Massacre 2, Black Roses, Trick or Treat, Slaughterhouse Rock

Number one champion of the rock & roll horror subgenre. Horror and rock music were both public enemy number one during the Satanic Panic of the 80s, and Sunny loves movies that lean into it. Slumber Party Massacre 2 is the most fun with the leather-clad rockabilly slasher facing off against members of an all-girl rock group with his massive (unmistakably phallic) electric guitar-drill.

Rain: Jaws 3, Humanoids from the Deep, The Fog, The Abyss

Absolutely nobody is shocked to discover Rain is a fan of underwater/nautical horror. He doesn’t even care if a movie is “good” as long as it’s wet and full of weird monsters or creatures. Avid defender of Jaws 3 (it has dolphins, hello). His taste is all over the place quality-wise, from b-movie creature features like Humanoids, to the cozy coastal ambiance of the Fog. As the only ghoul who can breathe underwater, he loves to watch others squirm during the breathing fluid scene in the Abyss.

[travllingbunny]

Hi! I love your posts and insights about the Wars of the Roses. Do you think you could talk a bit about Richard Duke of York? What do you think his character/life was like? Also re his and his sons appearance??

Hi! I'm sorry for taking so long to answer your ask, but I just couldn't find the time before. (I happen to currently have more free time than usual, due to particular circumstances.)

Thank you for asking about Richard, Duke of York, because I think he is a very interesting historical figure who gets usually overshadowed by his sons. If one day someone decides to make a new TV show or movie about the Wars of the Roses that doesn't just skip over the 1460s and start when Richard Duke of York is already dead, his life would make quite a compelling story.

As for historical books about him, I recommend Matthew Lewis' Richard, Duke of York: King by Right.(2016), which is a very detailed (but still very interesting, to me at least) account of his life. I read it a few years ago so I don't remember all the details, only the main points and overall impression I got from it.

My main impression is that, although he is often portrayed by pro-Lancaster writers as power-hungry, this is far from the truth. It seems unlikely that he ever wanted to challenge Henry VI and put himself forward as king, before the last year of his life - and this controversial act makes perfect sense when you look at the circumstances and the things that had happened to him and his family just before that. Besides, while Richard was for a long time - before Edward of Lancaster was born - Henry VI's heir, it seems more likely that he was hoping that his son would one day succeed Henry, rather than himself, since Henry was younger than him and in good physical health. Rather than the result of some evil overreaching lust for power, it seems to me that his conflict with the Lancaster/Beaufort faction was a result of the years of frustration over his treatment. As the conflict grew, staking his claim to the throne throne may have been an act of desperation (since, at that point, this must have seemed like the only way to protect himself and his family), but maybe he was also just really done with everything, and with Henry VI and unwilling to support him as King. Considering the context, I don't really think even pro-Henry VI people could really blame him.

But first I think we'd have to go back to the beginnings. I think that Richard's childhood and, most of all, what happened to his father, is what framed his whole life. Richard's mother, Anne Mortimer (great-granddaughter of Lionel, Duke of Clarence, the second of the sons of king Edward III who survived childhood), died soon after giving birth to him, aged only 22. His father, Richard, Earl of Cambridge (himself the grandson of Edward III through his 4th surviving son Edmund, the Duke of York), was executed - when Richard wasn't even 4 years old - for his involvement in the Southampton Plot to depose Henry V in favor of his brother-in-law, Edmund Mortimer (but since Edmund had no children, really in favor of his own son Richard, who would be his heir).

After all, the Lancasters, i.e., Henry V's father Henry IV , himself the son of Edward III's third son John of Gaunt, Duke of Lancaster, had deposed Richard II, skipping over the line of the elder son Lionel, so it could have been reasonably argued that the Mortimers's claim to the throne was stronger (sure, it was through the female line - but so was the English royals' claim to the throne of France - France had installed the Salic Law to bar the female lines from the throne of France - really to bar the English kings from it, but England did not). But Henry V was a crowned and annointed king, so trying to depose him would have been treason... (Even though he was only on the throne because his father had deposed, imprisoned and starved to death another annointed king. To quote one of my favorite TV shows, "Treason, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder". But it's crucial whether you won or lost.)

Just a couple of months later, his uncle Edward, his father's elder brother, was killed without children, Richard became the heir to his lands and titles and became the Duke of York at the age of 4. Ten years later, after the death of his maternal uncle Edmund, he also became heir to the Mortimer estates.

So, young Richard grew up as an orphan but also one of the technically most powerful and richest people in England, and heir not just to titles and lands but also the claims to the throne from not just the 4th but also the 2nd son of Edward III (the latter being the senior line of succession after the deposition and death of Richard II) to rival the Lancaster dynasty. And at the same time, he lived in the shadow of the fact that his father had died as a traitor and rebel against the crown for pressing that same claim.

If I were to speculate about Richard's personality and how his upbringing shaped it, I think he was a person who tried hard to do everything right, to fulfil his duties in every way and be beyond reproach, exactly because he had so much responsibility and probably so much to prove. Something that really strikes me about Richard is that he seemed almost too perfect: competent, respected nobleman popular with the people, in a stable marriage, not known to have any mistresses or sexual transgressions, had seven children who survived childhood including four sons...What the contrast to Henry VI, a nice and pious man but notoriously disinterested in ruling (long before he started showing signs of mental ilness and became catatonic), prone to relying on favorites such as his extremely incompetent cousin Edmund Beaufort. and also, for a long time, unable to conceive a child with his wife Margaret of Anjou (and possibly uninterested in trying), before finally siring Edward.

And this is exactly why Richard must have come across as such a threat in the eyes of Queen Margaret, Edmund Beaufort and other people around Henry VI. How could they not be wary of his powerful man, Henry's cousin and heir, who had all the qualities you'd want in a king, which Henry lacked? However, if he was really power hungry and eager to replace Henry as king, he certainly didn't show that for many years. I think he must have been especially eager to prove his loyalty with the "son of the traitor" thing hanging over his head since he was a child. But he was nevertheless constantly under suspicion and distrusted by the Queen and her faction. I remember reading the details of his career, which come across as Richard constantly having to prove himself while being denied positions or sent away - his appointment in Ireland was really meant a virtual exile, to get him away from court (but it resulted in him and by extension the York dynasty gaining long-term popularity and stronghold in Ireland). (One of the common myths is that Richard was warlike and that this got him in conflict with the supposedly more peaceful faction - in fact, if I remember correctly, it was Edmund Beaufort who acted belligerent in France but made a mess of things, which Richard then had to clean up.)

It all must have been really frustrating to Richard - he was doing everything right, but it was never enough, and he had to prove his loyalty over and over. Maybe the Queen and the Lancastrians really created a self-fulfilling prophecy. Theoretically, I suppose Richard could have been binding his time and playing some really long con to depose Henry, but that seems unlikely looking at the details.

Instead, I think the most likely reason for his decision to start claiming the throne for himself in 1460 is that the conflict had become too harsh and the situation too desperate after he had been proclaimed a traitor to the crown and had to flee to Ireland. The attainder meant he was to be killed if he set foot in England again, and his family was disinherited. He had to successfully invade (ironically, he was in a similar situation that the future Henry IV before he deposed Richard II) and then either make himself Lord Protector again or even Henry's heir, or to proclaim himself the true king.

But I think the earlier loss at the castle of Ludlow, when the Yorkist troops were reluctant to fight the Lancastrian army when Henry VI himself was at its head (a puppet or not, ineffectual or disinterested, the annointed king was seen in an almost religious light and had enormous symbolic authority), and then the brutal sack of the castle, where Richard's wife Cecily Neville, his daughter Margaret and his two youngest children George and Richard (who was only 7) at the very least had to witness awful scenes of rape and pillage, by that same army with Henry as its nominal head... this may have been the straw that broke the camel's back and made Richard decide he was done with Henry VI. (Whether or not he had earlier really respected Henry or just respected his position as King.) And I really can't blame him.

I wonder how he felt when he finally made that decision, which would lead to his death less than a year later - followed by his eldest son's successful campaign and decisive victory over the Lancasters? Was it sheer desperation and survival, was he angry, did he decide he deserved the crown after all and was going to take it, did he feel any pride and relief that his decision would also basically mean an annoncement that his father was not really a traitor? I don't know, but I'm surprised there aren't more novels, movies and TV shows with him as the protagonist, delving into those questions.

Now, as for Richard's appearance and those of his sons.

There doesn't seem to be a lot of direct evidence of what he looked like (and the drawing that, for whatever reason, you'll find most often as a supposed portrait of him on Google definitely isn't reliable), but there are some indirect ones: Richard III was said to particularly look like his father. The phrase about Richard III looking like his father in face and figure has been often interpreted to mean that Richard, Duke of York was short, because Richard was a bit on the shorter side. However, there's no indication whatsoever that York was short, and we know that Richard III was shorter than he would've otherwise been due to his scoliosis (but still quite taller than some other men such as Niklas von Popplau, the German knight who was his guest and described him later). And to put things into context - Richard III was being praised for his similarity to his father and the mention of his figure seems more likely to be a reference to the late Edward IV becoming notoriously overweight in his 30s (while Richard was slim and lean), so I think it simply meant that their father Richard Duke of York was slim and in good shape when he was killed at the age of 49.

This miniature portrait of Richard Duke of York from the Talbot Shrewsbury book (around 1445, when he was 33/34, around the same age Richard III was when he died) shows a blond man with a strong chin - similar to that seen in the portraits of his sons Edward and Richard, an acquiline nose similar to Richard, and full lips (the one detail that doesn't match Richard that well and in fact seems more similar to Edward, going by their portraits).

There are a lot of myths about what the brothers looked like that were mostly created by historical fiction - including that Edward and George were tall and strong while Richard was small (in fact, I don't think we have any contemporary evidence of what George looked like), or that Edward or maybe George too were blond while Richard was dark (both Edward and Richard seemed to have medium brown hair) or that Edward and Richard looked nothing alike. I actually think there is quite a resemblance between the two brothers mostly in chin and face shape, which probably would've been obvious before Edward had gained weight and his face shape got much fuller.

[prose-mortem]

A Day of Fallen Night by Samantha Shannon: ARC Review

Rating: 5/5 Stars

Samantha Shannon has universes inside of her mind, and I feel so lucky to be privy to the mythologies, poetries, and magic she brings forth through her writing. This book is in the top five favorite fantasy books of all time for me, which is really saying something since I read around 300 books per year… most of which are SF/F. A Day of Fallen Night is a masterpiece, and I will be recommending it to every single person willing to discuss books with me.

This fantasy work is the book that women+, femmes, and women who love women deserve. Every female character is deeply cultivated and nurtured in terms of character development and page time, which I cannot say for most fantasy books being written these days. A wide range of ages is represented from girlhood to elder years, and that is so very meaningful since many fantasy works are more skewed toward a teenage audience. While there is nothing wrong with a market for younger readers, we need a place for people above the age of 23 to be able to self-actualize and find themselves through the books they read. Women of all ages are heroes, and they deserve to be seen in all their glory, regardless of the season of life they are in. As one of Shannon’s characters says: “If women are flowers, we are not roses, but day’s eyes- blooming not once, but over and over, each time the light touches us.”

Although any male/men+ characters who appear in the book are crafted with care and attention, the emphasis is less on romantic (and sexual) love between men and women, but rather is centered on friendship. Though men in Shannon’s book are meaningful and heartfelt, they never steal the show from the women+/female characters. The real romances and complexities of passion are given to the women—the sapphic element of Shannon’s book(s) being one of the most appealing to me. Even though this work of fantasy is far from being all sunshine and roses, it feels like a safe space to explore relationships between women with all their nuances and challenges.

The thing about big fantasy books is that they can also be slow burns. Some people enjoy a slow, but methodical approach to storytelling, but I would be lying if I said I was one of them. Shannon’s book is a BIG ONE, but I failed to find a single dull or boring moment the entire time I was burning through it. As with many fantasy works, the story is told from the perspectives of a few main characters (mostly women), with the occasional, important side character added in as the book progresses. (There are nonbinary characters too with they/them pronouns!) With many big (nearly 1,000 pages) works like this, I usually find myself loving one or two characters, but being bored with the others… sometimes feeling like I want to skip the chapters with perspectives of the characters I find less interesting. I loved every single character in A Day of Fallen Night and found myself re-reading passages because the prose was just that beautiful or pivotal. There is something to enchant you in every paragraph whether it is amazing poetry, deep wisdom, or a juicy unfurling of one of the beloved characters. In short, Samantha Shannon has a rare gift, even in a market as massive as fantasy storytelling. Every word is potent, and every chapter is as inviting as the last. There is no filler or sense that she is trying to rush through the plot. Every moment is purposeful and delightful, and my hat is off to Shannon for her skillset.

You may be thinking at this point: “Sounds great! You didn’t really tell me much about the book’s plot though.” The truth is that I can’t dive too deeply into the details because this is one of those books that is best enjoyed when almost every morsel is allowed to flower in the moment. Simply put, it would be all too easy to ruin something for another reader, and I do not want to steal that experience from anyone. What I will say is that as much as I obsessed over The Priory of the Orange Tree, this book is even better (It’s hard to imagine, I know.). A Day of Fallen Night takes place about 500 years before the events in Priory of the Orange Tree, so if you read POTOT first, you will find some easter eggs and “aha!” moments in this prequel. For those who might read ADOFN first (since they can be read in any order), I am pleased to tempt you/them with the knowledge that there are talking dragons, adventures in the peaks of the high mountains, magic, and so many beautiful moments that give you chills when you realize where Shannon is going with a plot idea or character connection. So, if you want to give yourself the best treat in the world and live several lifetimes within the span of a book cover, this is the number one book you will want to read in 2023.

Lastly, I am so grateful to the publishers and creatives at Bloomsbury and Netgalley who sent me an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review. To you lovelies, it may have been another approval request on a Wednesday, but you wielded the kind of magic nestled in the realms of humans and transformed my week into something beautiful and enrapturing. Thank you so much.

[ereviews]

Elsa's Roadtrip? Review of Travels With The Snow Queen by Kelly Link

In Travels With The Snow Queen by Kelly Link, readers meet Gerda who has just had her boyfriend kidnapped by the Snow Queen. Gerda begins her adventure by following the trail of glass left behind by the Snow Queen (while barefoot). As she (us) makes the journey she thinks about how stories and epic adventures aren’t kind to women. Gerda first meets a talking raven who speaks of Briar Rose, a princess in the castle. Gerda ventures inside to discover that Kay (her boyfriend) is not there. She continues until she meets the Bandit Queen, who wishes to kill her. Someone who we only refer to as the “robber girl” says she wants Gerda as a sister instead of her being killed. She later gives Gerda boots for her feet and a guide to meet the old woman of Laplark. She helps to send Gerda on her way to the Snow Queen’s palace. Once inside, she realizes that Kay is cursed and will only be uncursed with a kiss. After all the awful things she has realized he has done, she decides to leave him as is. Gerda then meets The Snow Queen and realizes she is much kinder than originally thought. It seems the two of them will get along.

I loved this short story! I unexpectedly found the 2nd person POV to be both essential and fitting for this piece. It personally helped me to understand and sympathize with Gerda as she dealt with the led-down of the century with Kay. In my understanding of the story, I felt that the overall theme was female empowerment and the idea of bettering yourself despite/through your struggles. In the beginning, we as readers see that Gerda is wholly devoted to Kay. She was willing to travel with glass and snow pressed to her foot, without any protection from the elements, solely to get to her love. The first foreshadowing that we see of what Kay truly is, is his coat. It is wet and smells like a dog. I interpreted that to basically call him a dog in the social sense. I think one of my favorite parts of the story is the monologue she has at the beginning of her story. She talks about how fairy tales aren’t kind to women. They are always suffering, often in relation or connection to a man. One of the fantasy elements that caught my interest was the talking animals. They seem to both be a representation of something and also just exist within the story. The talking Raven that we meet immediately talks about how Kay doesn’t love Gerda (in all fairness the raven wasn’t wrong). Upon further reading, we as readers understand that this is probably because the raven is caught up on all the hot gossip in the castle and knows that Kay cheated on Gerda with Briar Rose. After that whole ordeal, we get to see Gerda’s “list.” And it is scathing. I felt like we obviously knew that she was angry with Kay, but seeing the list helped to add to my understanding. She slowly and methodically takes him mentally down a peg, from his habits, to how good he is in bed. This isn’t a new anger, just a re-exposed wound that had been building. The next character we meet (who has an impact) is “the robber girl.” I’ll call her RG for short. Within the first few seconds of the meeting, RG is already saving Gerda’s life by taking her in as her sister. Gerda explains her story to RG and RG immediately comforts her. I felt that this may have been the first time Gerda had experienced truly caring kindness in a while, even before Kay left with the Snow Queen. RG gives Gerda her boots because of her cut-up feet. It truly felt like a big sister watching after her younger sister. I felt that this was maybe the most important relationship Gerda made during this whole adventure. While it’s origin, was a little testy, it seemed to be the healthiest relationship available to her. I also had a sense that RG had dealt with a bull-headed man when she tapped Bae. Maybe that even RG had something to do with how Bae came to be in this form.

 I think it may also be important to point out that the community of elderly women knows the Snow Queen. They mention inviting the Snow Queen out for cards. This is a clue for how we really should interpret the queen. I also found the situation to be a bit funny. Old women know, but ignore the status of someone powerful to gossip. That is a nod to at least three different stereotypes.

One of the important interactions in the story, in my opinion, is when Gerda sees the Snow Queen before they talk. All of this story, we have had a builder-up to amazingly powerful, ethereal, statuesque women. And then she is introduced for the first time, and she isn’t what was expected. She doesn’t exactly meet her reputation. I think one of my favorite jokes in literature appears here. After all this travel, rivalry, and stupidity, this story leads Gerda to be offered a business opportunity. She accepts that one day Kay may be freed from his enchantment (hopefully never in my opinion). While saying this, her literary voice sounds very mature. Gerda (in my opinion) seems to accept her place in all the chaos, all of what she is meant to do. Overall, I really this reading and would highly encourage you to check it out.

[haroldgross]

New Post has been published on Harold Gross: The 5a.m. Critic

New Post has been published on https://literaryends.com/hgblog/doctor-who-series-1-2024-re-reboot/

Doctor Who (series 1 - 2024 re-reboot)

[3.5 stars]

If we are to believe that history doesn’t repeat itself, but it rhymes, then this newest season of the long-running show is a very clever limerick (occasionally bordering on doggerel). Which isn’t to say it isn’t entertaining, but it is all very familiar if you’ve been watching all along.

The very fact that they’ve started renumbering this series from “1” again is a huge flag. By my reckoning it was series 14 (or even 15) of Davies’ 2005 relaunch, but the Disney alliance has definitely caused more of a shift than a typical new Doctor would. But it also explains the odder-than-usual transition… and why I ended up calling them the Series 13.Interregnum and Series 14 Bridge; I had no better guidance other than plots. Though the renumbering of the series wasn’t announced, it was definitely reflected in the structure.

What Disney did get for the show was a larger budget and a new audience. The question is whether the show, which admittedly evolves all the time, can still find its core or has it leapt to an entirely different orbit?

With Ncuti Gatwa (Barbie) in the TARDIS seat, a new tenor is evident. It is one of boundless and unshakeable (and often undangerous) joy for most of the series. It borders on manic disregard, in fact. Millie Gibson, veteran of another long-running BBC series Coronation Street, as his companion matches his pitch perfectly. And she’s almost indistinguishable from the long line of young female stars Disney has burped out in recent years.

If I sound a bit frustrated and concerned, well, I am. What set Who apart over the years was that despite the dangers there was always almost always humor and enjoyment…tempered with reality and darker issues. People died all the time. Bad things happened. But life persevered and, on balance, things were set to rights even if the damage couldn’t be reversed. This relaunch feels much more Pollyana. While the season, as a whole, manages to find some small bit of balance at the end, it is also very hand-wavy as to the mechanisms of triumph. However, the emotional journey is nicely executed and the next season set up with some interesting possibilities.

As usual, I wrote up each individual show as they aired as a way to gage my immediate reaction and rethink (where needed) of the story. What follows is full of spoilers… you have been warned!

Space Babies No where is the series relaunch more evident than this initial episode. Not only is the Disneyfication on high exposure (talking babies? Really?) but Davies stole liberally from Rose to help explain the Doctor and the universe to his new audience. I don’t begrudge him a reprise of the old hits. They were and are great devices and getting more people into the show so it survives, the better.

But I have to admit, this first show worries me. I trust Davies. He is one of the best screenwriters out there. If anyone can work within a limited structure to shim in reality, it will be him. But I left this first episode wincing.

The Devil’s Chord Well, I can’t say my fears are mollified by the second installment of the season, but they were tamped a little. This story is darker and picks up what is clearly the big arc for the season. But this season really feels like a replay of Davies greatest hits from 2005. Echoes of Rose and The Impossible Girl and, well, you name it, it’s there. I love that we’re getting some new villains, but the whole tenor of the series swings wildly between the Doctor’s despair and feeling helpless and unbounded, and unearned optimism that makes it seem like our favorite characters are on their favorite blend of Molly.

What I will give Devil’s Chord is that Davies layers in LBGTQ+ themes in ways that will likely slip past many household defenses because they aren’t the focus, they are just part of the tale. And Jinkx Monsoon (AJ and the Queen) eats up the screen wonderfully. Also, I saw this episode the same day I was watching the restoration of Let it Be, which added an odd sort of frission to it all.

Boom All I can say is: thank god! This latest Steven Moffat tale for Who is right up there with his previous best. Even with the oversimplifications and new, lighter Disney bent, this was a tense and adult episode. It gives me hope this latest reboot may yet pull together after all. To be clear, it isn’t perfect and it has a very, very hand-wavy, silly (technologically) ending, but it also has depth and impact. And, yes, it lays out another brick in the bigger arc.

This season continues to echo from previous Davies uber-plots. It’s almost like fun mirror on his first five seasons pulled into a single, chaotic run. Again, I’m trusting Davies to make it all worth the effort, but for existing fans and previous viewers, it almost feels a little cheap or stale at times. We’ve done the battlefield. We’ve had the female companions with mysterious origins. We’ve watched the Doctor watch his crew with detached but pointed purpose. On the upside, so far it is all new enemies, which is a welcome change. I could go an age without another Cyberman, Dalek, or even a Master episode. They all got great arcs in the 2005 run, with some nice wind-ups as that sequence handed off to this one. Reaching back to the Toy Maker and his kin was inspired…if it can avoid being a bit too god-like. We shall see. At least I’m not only not dreading the next installment now, I’m looking forward to it. I can’t say that was my feeling earlier in this week.

73 Yards Oh, this is a wonderful mess of an episode. Penned by Davies, but pulling on the sense of Moffat’s Blink. I love loops and paradoxes, but this one, other than the one brilliant use of the trope, just doesn’t hold together in any way. It is atmospheric and fun, but it ultimately doesn’t make sense.

If you assume Ruby is put into an alternate timeline (which is why the Doctor appears to vanish) cool, BUT why does the Doctor even know Roger Gwilliam before and after the loop has ended? The fairy circle implies Gwilliam has died and should stay dead… but then he wouldn’t have existed in the timeline before the circle was broken. But he did. And still does. And what is the old Ruby saying to everyone that terrifies them so much that even her own mother hates her and cuts her out of her life? I’m sorry, the story is a mess. No amount of cleverness and atmosphere can cover the holes. And, just as frustrating, the echoes from the pervious series continue in a way that feels like we’re watching a cover band rather than new stories. We’ll see where all this goes, but it is one of the weakest seasons since Moffat’s horrid entry years back. It is unevenly written, oddly targeted audience-wise, and not very original. Here’s hoping things improve and that Davies can pay off the larger arc in a way that will win me back.

Dot and Bubble There it is! This is what Who can be at its best. OK, close to its best. The episode is still a little “light” in some ways, but Davies really managed to have it pack a punch by the end. What is most interesting is that the Doctor and Ruby are very much at the periphery of this one. The story is mostly carried by Callie Cooke and, to a lesser degree, Tom Rhys Harries (Slaughterhouse Rulez). Cooke walks a fine line and only really struggles with a couple of the odder physical tropes of the plot. But any minor weaknesses aside, this episode restored my hope that this new incarnation of Who as a series hasn’t really lost it in the move to Disney. It is rich with commentary and slyly dark in message.

Also by this episode the uber-arc with Ruby is getting fully acknowledged. So who is this old woman who seems to be puling a Bad Wolf? Like many of previous series echoes, Davies is dropping breadcrumbs that, I suspect, won’t make any sense till the end. But they are fun to notice and speculate upon. He also very cleverly keeps you off-balance from seeing his intent by driving things forward without much of a chance to breathe so that the ending really lands.

Rogue

Well the echoes just keep coming this episode. Not just the Bridgerton riffs, but the entire Rose and Captain Jack storylines…down to some of the dialogue. The guest stars certainly helped energize the story though. Jonathan Groff (Knock at the Cabin) and Indira Varma make wonderful additions to the series and, despite some rather silly, feathery fun, pull off their characters with gusto. Groff, in particular, channels John Barrowman’s Harkness…right to the resolution. This wasn’t a great episode, but it was full of fun and a great tongue-in-cheek sensibility about conventions, cos-play, and Bridgerton obsession. And, despite the OMG reactions to the kiss, it wasn’t the first same sex kiss in the series. Harkness gets that at the end of the first season (2005). But that reporting is another symptom of the remaking of the show and ignoring what came before or co-opting it with a new veneer.

The Legend of Ruby Sunday and Empire of Death This two-part finale is chock full of information and definitely some surprises. Bringing back Sutekh from the Pyramids of Mars was a huge call-back for the part I ending. I always wondered what had happened to him and can’t wait to see how he broke out of the infinite time corridor the 4th Doctor trapped him in.

But the resolution to this major arc is, again, just full of callbacks: Father’s Day (you’re important because you’re ordinary) and The Doctor Dances (just this once, everybody lives). I don’t mean to sound sour…you can take them as inside nods. But as a long-time viewer, I want something new or building upon the past, not mirroring it for no reason other than bringing back the greatest hits for a new audience who doesn’t recognize them. And worse, despite the emotional tugs, the season finale and mayhem is almost entirely negated at the end, and only some minor things (admittedly cleverly, the reason for 73 yards if not all the aspects of it) justified. The finale resurrects the battle at Canary Warf, but then literally resurrects all the killed. Where’s the danger and risk if no one can actually die? I do think the mechanism behind that massively cowardly choice was very clever. Brining death to Death to bring life is a great Who moment. But the whole finale was rushed and with some odd leaps in logic and plot. The whole spoon scene was utterly unexplained in terms of how he got there and why and who she was.

For the next season, they’ve set up the resolution (maybe) of one of Who’s greatest mysteries: whatever happened to Susan? The narrator (still unexplained, but with hints dropped all over) also has some influence to wield. I will be there to see what will happen, but hopefully Who will once again forge its own path and not dredge up the past so cheaply.

Where to watch

[mad-madam-m]

T&B2 Thoughts: Episode 1 – A word to the wise is enough

OKAY I am slowly rewatching the new season after bingeing it on Friday, and scribbling out my thoughts and feelings in a slightly more coherent manner although still very much with the shrieking because, like. Wow. I was trying to keep my hopes manageable in the run up to the new season, but the show gave me everything I wanted and then some.

As before, these will be tagged “M watches TNB��. Unlike before, these rambles will be entirely behind a cut because WOW talk about spoilers. FAIRLY BE YE WARNED.

- Okay, first off, a criticism: this type of flashforward for an opening is one of my least favorite narrative tropes. It often feels like a cheap way to heighten tension and while it can be used well, it's often not. And I...don’t think it was necessary here. I think the only reason it's here is because otherwise, the beginning of s2 is nearly identical to the beginning of s1.

- That being said, I like that the beginning of the seasons match. For one, the first episode of the first season makes a great intro to this world and how it works, and y'know, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. And in this one, not only does it do that as an intro to Stern Bild and Hero TV, it also works for showing us returning fans how things are different. I love the (re)introduction of all the heroes, the subtle changes in the way the show is pitched at the beginning that tell us just how things have evolved since the end of The Rising.

- And nowhere, nowhere in any of the press for the show did they even drop a hint that FUCKING RYAN WAS COMING BACK. I shrieked when he came sailing up. I expected maybe a cameo, not that he’d be back as a main character.

- There are also a lot of changes in the way they treat the female characters in this series. Tiger & Bunny has always been pretty good about that, considering how anime women are usually treated, but they take it a step further now. Blue Rose isn't objectified nearly as much—her entrance in this episode is pretty much the only time in the series we see that pan up her body. Agnes has noticeably gained some weight, but it's only mentioned once and it's never made into a joke. Part of it might be the time—it's been 11 years since the first one came out, after all—and part of it might also be the influence of a female director. Regardless, I appreciate it.

- Kotetsu and Barnaby having a fight over Kotetsu drinking one of Barnaby's juices energy drinks and Barnaby refusing to talk to him over it is the exact level of petty married bickering I have craved.

-  The show does such a great job of explaining the new system in a way that feels natural to the story. There's a lot of worldbuilding they have to cram in up front to get you ready to go, and they do it so well, while still giving you little character moments with our mains. Like Barnaby's utter offense at being called "old man." XD

- One of the things I have wanted since I finished watching the first series in 2017 is a photo of Barnaby on Kotetsu's shelf. And the show gave us one that is perfect.

It's clearly just after the events of The Rising, with Barnaby, Kotetsu, and Kaede, and it's right next to the photo of Kotetsu, Tomoe, and baby Kaede. It could not be more obvious that Barnaby is part of Kotetsu's family now, and while Tomoe will always be an important part of his past, Barnaby is an important part of his present.

- And then we go to Barnaby and the entire fucking jungle in his apartment, I cannot even with this man. This is so different from their apartments at the beginning of the first season, when Kotetsu's was a total mess and Barnaby's had absolutely nothing in it. They're both making strides to taking better care of themselves, and the places they live are indicative of that.

- I love that, at first blush, it really looks like Kotetsu's going off with one of his reckless plans that don't ever work. And then you realize, no, he's making himself the distraction to give Barnaby the chance to make a surprise attack. And they did all of this without speaking a word to each other because that's how in tune they are now. It's everything I've needed.

- LOOK AT THESE SOFT NERDS LOOK AT THEM.

- I admit, I was still a little worried about how this season was going to turn out throughout the first episode. And then the end credits happened, where Barnaby and Kotetsu are camping together with one tent and drinking coffee out of matching mugs while listening to a love song on the radio and that's when I knew everything was going to be fine.

[solemnsaturns]

doctor who for the ask game!

favorite male character: tenth doctor supremacy! he’s incredibly complex, multi-layered and intense. definitely one of the most compelling, interesting, and enjoyable characters in all of television.

favorite female character: rose tyler! she’s kind, compassionate and courageous, and she always takes care of those she cares about. i adore her.

least favorite character: it’s mickey smith for me... sorry, i just can’t and won’t force myself to pretend i care about his boring existence.

prettiest character: ten or rose. before anyone has the audacity to disagree, get your vision checked!

funniest character: donna noble, absolutely! this woman provided me with some of the most belly aching laughs i’ve ever experienced from a show.

favorite season: i am currently re-watching the show, and with a lot of the episodes fresh in my mind, series 2 are 4 are hands down my faves! i can’t choose between them.

favorite episode: the christmas invasion, turn left, new earth (my happy place, my emotional support episode), the unicorn and the wasp, and the BEST of the best: the impossible planet/the satan pit.

favorite romantic ship: well, as if i haven't made it obvious yet: tenrose! they’ll always be the superior couple for me. their love is consuming, passionate, adventurous, and even a little dangerous… (if you get it, you get it), which is precisely what makes them so epic and timeless.

favorite family ship: jackie/rose! their relationship is so amazing. i wish we had gotten more of these two, definitely one of the highlights of the show.

favorite friend ship: ten and donna’s sibling-like dynamic is very precious to me. it’s the way they are constantly bickering, arguing, bantering and getting the other in trouble, but, when shit goes down, they always back the other to the hill.

worst ship: either eleven/river or thirteen/yaz, i don’t know. both feel so rushed and haphazard. and the chemistry is close to non-existent.

[elpercotreviews]

All Time Favorite Mangas Part 2 (completed only)

That’s right, I remembered I had a tumblr. We will now commence part two of my all time favorite mangas, and of course, like I said before, these are only the manga that are completed.

6. Gokusen

If I had to pick something that was truly truly my all time favorite manga, it’d probably have to be Gokusen. It’s labelled as a josei, and I don’t know anyone who’s read it, despite its decent success. Gokusen also has an anime adaption as well as a live action adaption and I have not seen either, nor do I plan to lmaooo.

Basically Gokusen is about this woman who becomes a teacher at a really rebellious all boys school, while also trying to hide the fact that she is the daughter and heir to a prominent yakuza family. I would say the main focus of the manga is fighting and comedy. The manga is super funny with a ton of jokes and gags, and I’ve actually reread Gokusen multiple times.

And yes, I will address probably the biggest issue of this manga which is the age gap and difference in power between the female lead and her main love interest. SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS I do appreciate how the manga tried to offset the issues by making the FL a ditzy idiot and the ML really mature, but that didn’t change the fact that she’s his teacher .... IDK They also technically don’t kiss until like this special epilogue chapter thingy a whole year after the manga ended. So yeah tbh idk how to feel about it. The manga itself suprisingly didn’t have too much of a focus on “romance” per se because the ML only confesses his feelings at the VERY end, like this within the last like twenty pages of the entire manga. And the FL sorta-ish kinda doesn’t reciprocate??? SORTA IDK. Basically she’s kinda just like flustered and shooketh by it and they almost kiss but get interrupted. So yeah Imma forgive this relationship on the ground that it doesn’t start at all until the ML is graduated, a legal adult, and she is no longer his teacher.

DESPITE ALL THAT, like I said, this is genuinely my favorite manga that I’ve reread time and time again. It’s not very long either, like under 100 chapters so technically if you’re a fast reader like me, it can be read in a single day. For context, I read the entirety of Naruto in about a week lol. If you like comedy, and yazuka manga then I highly recommend.

7. Hirunaka no Ryuusei aka Daytime Shooting Star aka one of the best completed shoujo mangas out there

OKAY OKAY, this one’s a pretty mainstream favorite for those in the shoujo manga audience, BUT THERES A REASON FOR IT MMKAY. AND I HAVE A REASON FOR IT TOO. This manga holds a deep and special place in my heart for multiple reasons. AND BECAUSE I NEEDA GO IN DETAIL, THERE WILL BE SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

Okay FIRST. THE STORY. OMG, okay I think what sets this manga apart is how mature and realistic feeling the story feels. The characters are all really relatable and feel ya know, REAL. And IDK the vibes of this manga are just not really able to be replicated. Cuz the mangaka’s work after this one, Tsubaki-chou Lonely Planet ... SUCKED. And I’m saying this as a big fan of that mangaka (I’ve read all their short stories as well).

But on a more personal note, back when I was in high school, I had a boyfriend who was 19 while I was 16. He was half Japanese and I swore he looked like Shishio-sensei (those were rose tinted glasses, he was probably way uglier tbh, plus he was a total asshole). Reading this manga made me feel justified in the relationship, since the main character Suzume also had a weird situationship with an older guy. OH BOY I WISH YOUNGER ME HAD SOME MORE SENSE BUT THAT’S TOO LATE NOW ISN’T IT. And if you know how this manga ends, you already know she doesn’t even end up with her teacher, god bless. Back when I was younger and in that toxic relationship, I always wondered why did Suzume pick Mamura. I never understood it, because the teacher always felt like the main character. But when my relationship ended and I stayed single for a bit, it made me realize that was kinda the point of the manga. Suzume’s feelings for her teacher were supposed to be one-sided/unrequited sorta-ish. Because a relationship between a student and a teacher is obviously a big NO-NO. So of course, she ends up with Mamura, the guy friend who was nice and always there for her in a platonic way, and then eventually of course in a romantic way. The mangaka's short stories were also like that too where the main character moves on from an unrequited/inappropriate love to someone who is more age appropriate. And this is why the author’s OTHER manga fails BTW, because that whole message is THROWN AWAY and the FL ends up with a dude who’s double her age deadass in such a weird and unrealistic situation tbh. Yeah ... idk why they decided to completely switch up and fumble the bag like that. But ANYWAY, I have a lot of love and respect for this manga because it helped me really reanalyze and think about my own love life and relationships.

Also Mamura is such a sweetie pie. I’m such a sucker for his character type now that I’m older. Obviously I used to be wayyyy more into Shishio-sensei’s type but I’ve matured and can see why Mamura was for the win bwahaha.

8. Ouroboros

If you’re like one of the 10 people reading my tumblr, then you may or may not have expected this to be something I love. I’mma start keeping things short cuz TBH, I started this post like MONTHS ago, and it’s taken me this long to write soooo here we go.

Basically Ouroboros is about two orphans who have a beloved carer/teacher. When they’re young she gets murdered and it all gets like covered up and shit so they vow revenge on the person who murdered here and all the cops that covered it up. In present day, Ikuo is a detective and Tatsuya is a yakuza member. They work together behind the scenes to uncover the truth and get their revenge.

Ouroboros is one of my favorite completed manga in the seinen genre because it has kinda everything I like about the genre. It’s dark, it’s gritty, it doesn’t hold back its punches. The main female character and sorta love interest is actual INTERESTING and her life doesn’t evolve around the main guy. She has her own story and her own shit going on too.

The main two characters are also very interesting in their motivations and personalities because they are two very different people but share a common bond and goal in life. I really liked their relationship and how the interacted and worked together.

TBH the art style is kinda more on the ugly side, but it’s definitely tolerable and there are some scenes that looked pretty good.

SPECIAL MENTION

Tokyo Ghoul AND Tokyo Ghoul Re (until the very end oof)

My opinion for this is NOT a hot take, cuz multiple people seem to have this similar sentiment.  Since Tokyo Ghoul:re is a direct sequel I’m counting them as together mmkay. I loved Tokyo Ghoul and I loved Tokyo Ghoul:re. They were so good, all the characters, the worldbuilding, the lore, the abilities, etc. Ghouls were such an interesting and cool take on the like vampire/demon-esque category and no other manga I’ve seen has any sorta similar creature to ghouls. At least, not to this level of depth and development. I also absolutely adored the art style and thought it was soooo good. I also love Kaneki Ken and I’ve seen the anime (not the :re anime I heard that shit was kinda wack). BUT if you asked me what the FUCK happened in like the last 15/10 chapters of Tokyo Ghoul:re, I could not tell you to save my life.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS I gotta be honest, I genuinely don’t think I can properly recall wtf happened after that one ghoul/investigator guy died. Everything after that was a blur to me. I remember Touka getting pregnant, and Kaneki turning into some giant ugly ass tumor thing and THAT’S ABOUT IT.

I thought the set up for the sequel was SOOO good. The introduction of ghoul investigators, having Kaneki have this dual/forgotten personality. I thought Kaneki as Haise was really cute and sweet. So it just sucks that the moment that Haise is gone, you lose your “likable” protagonist. And now you just have this guy that’s all evil and dead inside. Like I know this is a common theme in stories, and in shounen manga, of living long enough to turn into the villain, but idk I feel like it didn’t work for Tokyo Ghoul, especially the weird tumor monster ending was so random feeling and wtf, and just URGH.

Such a good manga ruined by the ending and inability to close out and tie the story up. I feel like Kaneki’s story coulda ended in such a better way. Cuz this isn’t even dramatically sad or emotional in a good way that pulls your heart strings. I remember reading the last chapters and truly going like “girl what the fuck is going on.”

Blade of the Immortal

I liked it. Pretty good. Just ... another issue of women being written off really weirdly, pushed to the side kinda issue. Not too bad but definitely noticeable where the main female character, despite how LONG this story is, never truly has any real character growth and awkwardly always remains needed to be saved and weak. Still good story and would recommend it for people looking for a kinda classic old-time samurai story.

[avaantares]

I'm about to be controversial, y'all.

So... am I the only one who's extremely unexcited to see RTD put back in charge of Doctor Who? I know lots of people have fond nostalgia for his era of showrunning -- and that's fair; my favorite DW characters and storylines also hail from those seasons -- but I keep looking back at his Whoniverse and remembering

the poor handling of season arcs: e.g. shoehorning the words "Bad Wolf" into every episode to suggest there's a continuing story and then... not having it signify anything except the fact that the words "Bad Wolf" were in every episode. Ditto "the bees are disappearing," et al. There was no building story, no progressive reveal, no real sense of continuity -- but then the season finale would throw out some supposedly-shocking revelation that pretended it tied everything together. Only it didn't feel like a proper payoff, because all we'd gotten was a random line once per episode to tick the requisite 'season finale reference' box.

what he did to some characters in DW, and his "defense" for it, which he then recycled for Torchwood: His stated reason for stranding Rose in an alternate universe/wiping Donna's memory/killing half the cast of Torchwood is because (and I can't find the exact quote right now, sorry) he's not interested in telling satisfying stories, but wants to do things that will shock the audience so they remember it and talk about it 50 years from now. (Sorry, but shock value alone isn't good storytelling. If I want to be angry/horrified/surprised/confused by events, I would just watch the news instead of a scripted TV show.)

the (frankly insulting) things he said about the fans and their attachment to said characters after their disappointing endings in DW/Torchwood. (Dude, you know we can hear you, right?)

what he did with the Torchwood sequels: His exact quote, cited by (I think) Scott Handcock in an issue of Vortex, was "Let's drive it off a cliff!" And then he proceeded to trash almost all of the established character growth from the previous decade's worth of series material.

the bulk of Miracle Day, which he wrote, and which was... You know, I've already written thousands of words detailing all the ways that series fails to support the continuity of the previous three TV seasons of Torchwood and the greater Whoniverse, so I won't reiterate all that here, but the fact that he directly contradicts his own previous scripts, scenarios, worldbuilding and characterization multiple times in that series really doesn't reassure me that he won't do something incredibly jarring and out of line/continuity with a new DW season.

Now, all that said, did RTD also do some things well as DW showrunner? Yes, he did. He certainly deserves credit for successfully resurrecting a franchise that had previously failed (more than once -- *cough*American Doctor Who movie*cough*). He established the Time War mythos and set up the Doctor's subsequent recovery arcs, which became a touchpoint for the series as a whole. He introduced numerous great characters, cast members, and villains, including several of my personal favorites. He created Torchwood, a show I love despite its many, many flaws. Some of the most iconic episodes of the new series were produced during his tenure ("The Empty Child," "Blink," "Midnight," "Silence in the Library," et al.). And in total fairness, as much as I loathed the execution of Miracle Day, I do think it had a solid premise and raised fascinating questions, and could have been a really good stand-alone sci-fi series if it hadn't tried to be a Torchwood sequel/spinoff.

I'm also not going to argue that DW is perfect right now and should stay just as it is, because the series has definitely been treading water lately; there have been numerous story and long-term continuity issues during Chibnall's era. But what it really comes down to for me is that despite those good, lasting innovations he made in launching the reboot series, I don't really see a new RTD-helmed season fixing the troubled state of Doctor Who as it stands, because the things he did well aren't necessarily what the show needs to regain its sense of balance after the uneven scripting and continuity-flaunting turns it took over the last couple of seasons. At best, it will be a hard reset to an early-series atmosphere that largely ignores the questions raised by recent installments, rather than a recovery from the continuity-nuking bomb dropped during the last season finale. At worst, he'll continue the problems delineated by the bullet-pointed list above, and the series will sink deeper into a hole.

To me, the RTD re-appointment really feels like BBC/BBCA trying to cash in on the early-NuWho nostalgia train to regain the viewership it lost during Jodie Whitaker's tenure (not her fault at all, but some whiny little boys viewers ragequit at her introduction because *gasp* a female Doctor?! how dare! while others lost interest because of the weak scripts or other failings of the past couple of seasons). I think the decision is motivated less by "what is best for the development of Doctor Who as an ongoing series?" and more by "what's the fastest shot in the arm we can give our struggling ratings so we can capitalize on the upcoming 60th anniversary?"

I hope I'm just being paranoid, and RTD defies all my expectations and brings something new and delightful to the next series of DW. But I can't deny that when I read the announcement, my gut reaction was just, "Ugh." Maybe it's just the Torchwood fan in me, burned too often and in too many ways to trust RTD to stick the landing, but I'm honestly feeling more trepidation than anticipation right now.

[kcrabb88]

Queer Movies/Books/TV Shows for Pride Month!

Happy Pride everyone!! For your viewing/reading pleasure I have made a (non-exhaustive) list of queer media that I have enjoyed! 

Movies/Documentaries

Pride (2014): An old tried and true favorite, which meets at the intersection of queer and workers’ rights. A group of queer activists support the 1985 miners’ strike in Wales (complete with a sing-through of Bread and Roses + Power in a Union)

Portrait of a Lady on Fire: On an isolated island in Brittany at the end of the eighteenth century, a female painter is obliged to paint a wedding portrait of a young woman (or, two young lesbians fall in love by the sea, and you cry)

God’s Own Country: Young farmer Johnny Saxby numbs his daily frustrations with binge drinking and casual sex, until the arrival of a Romanian migrant worker for lambing season ignites an intense relationship that sets Johnny on a new path (Seriously this movie is GREAT and doesn’t get enough love, watch it! It’s rough but ends happily)

The Half of It:  When smart but cash-strapped teen Ellie Chu agrees to write a love letter for a jock, she doesn't expect to become his friend - or fall for his crush (as in she falls for his crush who is another girl. This movie was so good, and really friendship focused!) 

Saving Face:  A Chinese-American lesbian and her traditionalist mother are reluctant to go public with secret loves that clash against cultural expectations (this is an oldie and a goodie, with a happy ending!)

Moonlight:  A young African-American man grapples with his identity and sexuality while experiencing the everyday struggles of childhood, adolescence, and burgeoning adulthood (featuring gay men of color!)

Carol:  An aspiring photographer develops an intimate relationship with an older woman in 1950s New York (everyone’s seen this I think, but I couldn’t not have it here)

Milk: The story of Harvey Milk and his struggles as an American gay activist who fought for gay rights and became California's first openly gay elected official (the speech at the end of this made me cry. Warning, of course, for death, if you don’t know about Harvey Milk)

Pride (Hulu Documentary):  A six-part documentary series chronicling the fight for LGBTQ civil rights in America (they go by decade from the 50s-2000s, and there is a lot of great trans inclusion in this)

Paris is Burning (Documentary): A 1990s documentary about the African American and Latinx ballroom scene. Available on Youtube!

A New York Christmas Wedding:  As her Christmas Eve wedding draws near, Jennifer is visited by an angel and shown what could have been if she hadn't denied her true feelings for her childhood best friend (this movie is SO CUTE. It’s really only nominally a Christmas movie and easily watched anytime. Features an interracial sapphic couple!) 

TV Shows 

Love, Victor: Victor is a new student at Creekwood High School on his own journey of self-discovery, facing challenges at home, adjusting to a new city, and struggling with his sexual orientation (this is a spin-off of Love, Simon, and it’s very sweet and well done! Featuring a young gay man of color)

Sex Education:  A teenage boy with a sex therapist mother teams up with a high school classmate to set up an underground sex therapy clinic at school (this has multiple queer characters, including a featured young Black gay man and also in season 2 there is a side ace character!) 

Black Sails: I mean, do I even need to put a summary here? If you follow me you know that Black Sails is full of queer pirates, just queers everywhere.

Gentleman Jack:  A dramatization of the life of LGBTQ+ trailblazer, voracious learner and cryptic diarist Anne Lister, who returns to Halifax, West Yorkshire in 1832, determined to transform the fate of her faded ancestral home Shibden Hall (Period drama lesbians!!! A title sequence  that will make you gay just by watching!) 

Tales of the City (2019):  A middle-aged Mary Ann returns to San Francisco and reunites with the eccentric friends she left behind. "Tales of the City" focuses primarily on the people who live in a boardinghouse turned apartment complex owned by Anna Madrigal at 28 Barbary Lane, all of whom quickly become part of what Maupin coined a "logical family". It's no longer a secret that Mrs. Madrigal is transgender. Instead, she is haunted by something from her past that has long been too painful to share (this is based on a book series and it’s got lots of great inter-generational queer relationships!) 

The Haunting of Bly Manor:  After an au pair’s tragic death, Henry hires a young American nanny to care for his orphaned niece and nephew who reside at Bly Manor with the chef Owen, groundskeeper Jamie and housekeeper, Mrs. Grose (sweet, tender, wonderful lesbians. A bittersweet ending but this show is so so wonderful)

Sense8: A group of people around the world are suddenly linked mentally, and must find a way to survive being hunted by those who see them as a threat to the world's order (queers just EVERYWHERE in this show, of all kinds)

Books

Loveless by Alice Oseman:  Georgia has never been in love, never kissed anyone, never even had a crush – but as a fanfic-obsessed romantic she’s sure she’ll find her person one day. This wise, warm and witty story of identity and self-acceptance sees Alice Oseman on towering form as Georgia and her friends discover that true love isn’t limited to romance (don’t be turned off by this title, it’s tongue-in-cheek. This is a book about an aroace college girl discovering herself and centers the importance and power of platonic relationships! I have it on my TBR and have heard great things)

Detransition, Baby by Torrey Peters: Reese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy, an apartment in New York City, a job she didn't hate. She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane, bourgeois comforts. The only thing missing was a child. But then her girlfriend, Amy, detransitioned and became Ames, and everything fell apart. Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men.Ames isn't happy either. He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier, but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese—and losing her meant losing his only family. Even though their romance is over, he longs to find a way back to her. When Ames's boss and lover, Katrina, reveals that she's pregnant with his baby—and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it—Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for. Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family—and raise the baby together?This provocative debut is about what happens at the emotional, messy, vulnerable corners of womanhood that platitudes and good intentions can't reach. Torrey Peters brilliantly and fearlessly navigates the most dangerous taboos around gender, sex, and relationships, gifting us a thrillingly original, witty, and deeply moving novel (again, don’t be thrown off by the title, it too, is tongue-in-cheek. This book was GREAT, and written by a trans women with a queer-and especially trans--audience in mind)

A Tip for the Hangman by Allison Epstein: A gay Christopher Marlowe, at Cambridge and trying to become England’s best new playwright, finds himself wrapped up in royal espionage schemes while also falling in love (this book is by a Twitter friend of mine, and it is a wonderful historical thriller with a gay man at the center).

Creatures of Will and Temper by Molly Tanzer: a very very queer remix of The Picture of Dorian Gray (which was already quite queer), featuring amazing female characters, a gay Basil, and a much happier ending than the original. 

Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston: The gay prince of England and the bisexual, biracial first son of the president fall in love (think an AU of 2016 where a woman becomes president). Featuring a fantastic discovery of bisexuality, ruminations on grief, and just a truly astonishing book. One of my favorites!

One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston:  For cynical twenty-three-year-old August, moving to New York City is supposed to prove her right: that things like magic and cinematic love stories don’t exist, and the only smart way to go through life is alone. She can’t imagine how waiting tables at a 24-hour pancake diner and moving in with too many weird roommates could possibly change that. And there’s certainly no chance of her subway commute being anything more than a daily trudge through boredom and electrical failures. But then, there’s this gorgeous girl on the train (This is Casey McQuiston’s brand new novel featuring time-travel, queer women, and I absolutely cannot WAIT to read it)

The Heiress by Molly Greely: Set in the Pride and Prejudice universe, this takes on Anne de Bourg (Lady Catherine’s daughter), and makes her queer! 

Tipping the Velvet by Sarah Waters:  Nan King, an oyster girl, is captivated by the music hall phenomenon Kitty Butler, a male impersonator extraordinaire treading the boards in Canterbury. Through a friend at the box office, Nan manages to visit all her shows and finally meet her heroine. Soon after, she becomes Kitty's dresser and the two head for the bright lights of Leicester Square where they begin a glittering career as music-hall stars in an all-singing and dancing double act. At the same time, behind closed doors, they admit their attraction to each other and their affair begins (Sarah Waters is the queen of historical lesbians. All of her books are good, and they’re all gay! The Paying Guests is another great one)

(On a side note re: queer books, there are MANY, these are just ones I’ve read more recently. Also there are a lot of indie/self-published writers doing great work writing queer books, so definitely support your local indie authors!) 

[i-watch-too-many-movies]

5 Favorite First Watches of June 2021

First, a quick note. I’m sorry for the sudden disappearance. I decided that Tumblr wasn’t very good for my mental health, and that this was gonna be the beginning of an indefinite hiatus. I don’t know when I’ll be back, maybe every once in a while, but I decided that it’s time to just leave for a bit. However, I wanted to share with y’all 5 awesome movies I saw for the first time this month.

(CW: Abuse, mild spoilers for Miseducation of Cameron Post)

Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) (dir. Toshio Matsumoto)

Okay, to be honest, I admittedly got a little lost, but I had a great time watching this. Its mixture of avant-garde and documentary filmmaking, all while being a secret adaptation of Oedipus is absolutely incredible. So many images just stood out to me, such as the blood running down Eddie’s eyes, the riots being slowed down, sped up, and having static added to them, and the pure sensuality of Eddie and the club owner making love in the beginning (before we know the truth). Yes, technically there’s no evidence of Stanley Kubrick being inspired by this film when it came to making A Clockwork Orange, but the similarities are there, the gang fights in the streets, the girls licking the ice cream, the usage of wide angles, and of course, the sped-up footage set to classical music. It doesn’t make me think less of A Clockwork Orange, but think more of Kubrick for extending his influences. Can’t wait to re-watch and re-absorb its beauty and its surreal nature.

The Miseducation of Cameron Post (2018) (dir. Desiree Akhavan)

The two characters I felt worst for were Mark and Rick. Rick is a gay man raised in the church who is trying to be accepted amongst said church. He has no real answers for his sexuality, because sexuality is a complicated manner. It can’t be explained by “My parents didn’t love me enough” because that’s not the truth. It just has to deal with “You like this gender because you do”. And the last scene we see him in is with Cameron, Jane, and Adam Red Eagle, three people that are comfortable with their sexuality. That scene where he breaks down crying in front of Cameron is where he realizes that maybe everything he has been preaching has been full of shit.

Mark is a kid who nearly killed himself because no matter what he did, he could not please his family. So what does he do? He flips a Bible verse on its head. He relates it to his own struggles, deciding that his so-called weakness was his strength, that he doesn’t need to be saved, that he should find acceptance for who he is, and yet Bethany, the lead Reverend, still believes with all her heart that these kids need to be saved from whatever, showing the hypocrisies in the religion she practices and the book she follows. Rick has no one to go to for his own struggles. He never had the person to tell him that it was okay, and he thought the only way was to tell these kids that they need to change themselves for having different preferences in sexuality than others.

There’s also Adam, my favorite character in the film. They are a two-spirit, described by them as two spirits in their body fighting, and right now, the female spirit is beating the male spirit. They were sent to the camp after their father converted to Christianity and is running for some sort of office, making him look bad with their gender identity. And because two-spirit was a newly defined concept, it makes it all the more tragic that Adam’s father won’t even listen to them.

One of the saddest scenes of the film is when Bethany shaves Adam’s head. Adam is Indigenous, from the Lakota tribe, and their hair keeps getting in their eyes, much to the chagrin of Bethany. Hair is often seen as sacred in different cultures, and even in general, one of the most personal body parts on anyone, so to shave it all off by a white woman to an Indigenous person shows that racism and homophobia walk hand in hand. Powerful white people want to see any sort of expression done by non-white people whether it be through art or through their body gone.

Mysterious Skin (2004) (dir. Gregg Araki)

It’s hard to put into words how this film moved me so deeply. Eventually, I will. I will go through my scattered notes and paragraphs that go off on too many tangents about its brutality and its tenderness, and eventually turn it into a full piece about how it challenged me and my preconceptions of art as well as events in my own past. Those close-ups can either be so horrifying or so achingly sad. It’s not an easy watch, and certainly not for the faint of heart, so be wary and cautious once you do watch it, but just know it handles its themes of abuse and its effects on young men as they get older with such empathy, and honesty. Brady Corbet and Joseph Gordon-Levitt give performances as good as River Phoenix in My Own Private Idaho, and that’s the best compliment I can give any film or performance. Amazing film.

Pariah (2011) (dir. Dee Rees)

What does it mean to pray for someone? Is it to hope that their soul sees heaven in an afterlife? Is it to hope that they do well on a challenging event coming up soon, similar to wishing someone luck? Or maybe it’s to hope that they lead the best life they can, that they are happy with themselves and the situation they end up in.

To a lot of fundamentalist Christian parents, it's the first option. To them, that’s the goal. To live an eternal life in a heavenly paradise, and the first step includes not forgiving any of their kids who may be queer at the moment, and hoping they abandon who they are to make them happy, to upend the slight possibility that there is a heaven.

Pariah is about a young woman who is abandoned by her parents, who hope she can abandon her sexual attraction to girls so that she can follow the church with them. They don’t care about her poetry or her fashion sense, they want her to look pretty, more traditionally like a girl, as well as getting a boyfriend. When Alike confirms to her parents that she is gay, her mother beats her, kicking her out of the house, but easily forgiving her cheating husband, because the men are the most protected in the religious patriarchy.

God doesn’t make mistakes is the quote that Alike throws back at her father, accepting herself for who she is, using her mother’s words to make her feel prouder of herself. And much like The Miseducation of Cameron Post, the authority figure makes it a point to do all but say that the religious organizations are hypocrites and we don’t know what we’re talking about, we just want control.

Pariah is a beautiful film, a sad reality about being closeted from the ones you love most, but how sometimes there is no answer other than to leave it all and to feel the fullest amount of pure freedom, and feeling of being alive.

Tongues Untied (1989) (dir. Marlon Riggs)

An absolutely powerful film. Riggs takes a look at his life as a gay Black man and how he is seen by other members of the Black community, as well as the white racists in his life. He looks at his past relationships with white men and how said white men in the gay community sexually fetishize Black men that are in chains, and draw racist caricatures of them, similar to the Jim Crow drawings, only now they seem Black men as sexual objects in that sense. And yet, the Black gay men can’t get into certain sex clubs because of their skin color. Several poems read, narrated, and performed are about the fear of AIDS, wanting to enjoy sex, but not knowing who has AIDS, or that the condom may break. It’s only made sadder knowing that Marlon would later die from AIDS. An important film, a celebration of the Black gay culture in New York.

Other watches and rewatches I really liked:

2 Fast 2 Furious (2003) (dir. John Singleton)

Better Luck Tomorrow (2003) (dir. Justin Lin)

The Celluloid Closet (1995) (dir. Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman)

Cruising (1980) (dir. William Friedkin)

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006) (dir. Justin Lin)

Happy Together (1997) (dir. Wong Kar-wai)

The Night of the Hunter (1955) (dir. Charles Laughton) (rewatch)

Nowhere (1997) (dir. Gregg Araki)

Psycho (1960) (dir. Alfred Hitchcock) (rewatch)

School of Rock (2003) (dir. Richard Linklater) (rewatch)

[monstrousgourmandizingcats]

For the character ask meme, Harrow and/or Jessica Atreides

Reverend Mother of the Bene Gesserit Jessica Technicallynotatreides:

favorite thing about them

Jessica stands out in the canon of SFF Moms for being a unique, memorable, immediately recognizable character with clear motivations and desires of her own, even though those motivations and desires still mostly pertain to Frank Herbert's weird gender assumptions in general and the Bene Gesserit's sacramentalized pickmeism in particular. Can you name a single personality trait of anybody's mother in an Asimov or Heinlein novel? I can't, even though Heinlein (much as I hate him for many, many other reasons) was also relatively good at writing women for a male sci-fi author of the period. I also just love the idea, on a conceptual/meta level, of a Spooky Ninja Space Witch who has Jessica's role in the plot. Muad'Dib's mom has got it going on!

least favorite thing about them

See above re: Jessica's motivations and goals still mostly having to do with weird gender and reproductive politics, although I suppose that's true to life for the concubine of a duke in a feudal society, in the same way that Austen's protagonists all having motivations involving marriage is true to life for daughters of England's old landed gentry.

favorite line

“Anything outside yourself, this you can see and apply your logic to it. But it’s a human trait that when we encounter personal problems, these things most deeply personal are the most difficult to bring out for our logic to scan. We tend to flounder around, blaming everything but the actual, deep-seated thing that’s really chewing on us.”

(Hey, nobody ever accused Frank Herbert of believing that brevity was the soul of wit.)

random headcanon

She's bi/pan.

unpopular opinion

Leto I is great and all by the standards of his time and place, but in absolute terms Jessica still probably deserved someone better.

song i associate with them

"Witchcraft" by Frank Sinatra and "Mother" by Florence and the Machine.

favorite picture of them

Reverend Daughter of the Ninth House Harrowhark Nonagesimus:

favorite thing about them

She's the fucking worst. I have a "rancid female characters" tag for a reason. In both a feminist way and a psychosexual way I genuinely love female protagonists who are just overpoweringly messy and unpleasant people, and Harrow is a standout of the type. I also appreciate that a fervently religious lesbian is one of the main characters of a popular SFF series now.

least favorite thing about them

Harrow is one of those characters where I'm genuinely hard-pressed to come up with things I don't like about her, not because she doesn't have flaws (lmfao) but because her flaws all contribute to why I'm so invested in her. Gun to my head, I suppose I did get pretty pissed off at how long in took her in HtN to get it through her head that """""""God""""""" did not have her best interests in mind, but she can hardly be blamed for that considering the situation.

favorite line

About Harrow:

"Reverend Daughter Harrowhark Nonagesimus had pretty much cornered the market on wearing black and sneering. It comprised 100 percent of her personality. Gideon marveled that someone could live in the universe only seventeen years and yet wear black and sneer with such ancient self-assurance."

("comprised" here should really be "composed" but whatever, Tamsyn Muir is an award-winning author and I'm just an overeducated pedant who writes for a bunch of blogs.)

By Harrow:

"You are a murderer, a conwoman, a cheat, a liar, a slitherer, and you embody the worst flaws of your House--as do I."

random headcanon

Harrow has read some of Gideon's porn magazines. She genuinely doesn't get off on them or like them, but she has read them.

unpopular opinion

I actually think my Harrow takes are more or less orthodox, perhaps surprisingly for this type of character.

song i associate with them

Within Temptation, "The Truth beneath the Rose".

favorite picture of them

My all-time favorite Harrow art is this picture of her as a Novohispanic monja coronada, by @shigeko-nobufusa.

☆°● — character ask meme

[polikszena]

@mattzwright the great asked me to do this fandom ask game for Star Wars (and I will include the whole universe, or at least what I’ve seen of it) - Thank you for the asks! :)

My favorite female character: Hera Syndulla from Rebels. Honestly, to say one good thing about Disney buying Star Wars, is that they added more women to the universe (I’m aware that there were several ones in the now Extended Universe, but they were no way as well-known as the ones in the movies) and Hera was one of them. I remember that as a 12-year-old I struggled with not being able to relate to any of the female characters in Star Wars (the options were Padmé, Leia and Shmi), and about fifteen years later finally there was someone I could relate to. Even though we had only one thing in common: we both were the mom friends (and still are) of our groups. But besides that I like Hera a lot, because she is a great pilot and a good leader, but she also has a soft side and she cares a lot about her space children.

My favorite male character: Han Solo, without a doubt. He is my favourite Star Wars character since I joined the fandom a long, long time ago. I like that he’s a scoundrel with a heart of gold, his courage, his friendship with Chewbacca, and the fact that he flies with the Millennium Falcon.

My favorite book/season/etc: I think I’ll pick A New Hope, because even though my first Star Wars movie was A Phantom Menace, Episode IV was that dragged me into the universe. And I also have to mention here a Hungarian Star Wars parody book called Bárgyú árnyak - A Bárgyúgolyó Futam (Could be roughly translated as A Stupid Menace - The Goofball Run) which was a parody for A Phantom Menace, and my brother found it on some book sale. I re-read it a few years ago, and there are many jokes in it that I don’t find funny anymore (any many that I still do), but thanks to it, I added some important words to my Star Wars vocabulary such as “padbavaló” (means a person who should sit at a school desk; they used that word for padawans) or “fénykasza” (light scythe, the weapon of the Yeti Knights).

My favorite cast member: Now that's a tough question, as I'm not really into the Star Wars cast and by that I mean that I hardly watch or read interviews with them and nor I have looked up a cast member's entire filmography and started watching all their films (although there are people whose other works I also enjoy), so I'd say Harrison Ford because he makes me think about my grandfather.

My favorite ship: The Millennium Falcon! And as for the other kind of ship, my favourite is Hera Syndulla and Kanan Jarrus. And not because they became canon on my birthday, but because I think they have a healthy relationship, they support each other, they are already the mum and dad of a found family. 

A character I’d die defending: I'd say Rose Tico, because I think it was a nice addition to have a technician in the characters (so we could know another profession in the SW universe), moreover, a female technician, who was also of an ethnic minority. And although I didn’t like her monologue at the end of TLJ, I don’t think Kelly Marie Tran deserved the hate she got for Rose. (And I don't want to talk about TROS here, because I just can't remember what was Rose doing in that one.)

A character I just can’t sympathize with: Palpatine. Period.

A character I grew to love: General Hux, mostly because of the fanon stuff like he has a cat or that he’s a neat freak (although this one might be canon, honestly, I can’t remember). He’s very far from being a favourite character, but it’s never not funny imagining him throwing a tantrum over Kylo Ren walking through the spaceship with muddy boots. (Or worse...)

My anti otp: I think I’d go with Finn/Rey. I just cannot see them in a romatic relationship with each other. To me they are best friends.