#rowena is still in development of course

[vigilskeep]

how would rowena and keir get along?

much better than keir and minerva, i think! rowena doesn’t expect deference or take criticism and confrontation too seriously, unlike minerva who simply won’t tolerate the way keir talks, especially when his protectiveness makes her a target of it. rowena doesn’t mind ceding territory and letting someone else be the scariest thing in the room; in fact, as a rogue, she likes it when others take up more space and attention. she might be a little wary at first—keir does cause that in strangers, on purpose—but i think she’d find his whole bit endearing once she got to know him. kind of similar to her relationship with sten? like. u are very large and intimidating but i’m realising u are silly underneath. and also that it is not that hard to wrap u around my little finger

they don’t have very compatible uh morals or life choices i suppose, what with keir being fundamentally incapable of understanding what she did, but some of keir’s best friends are similarly incomprehensible to him. it doesn’t occur to him to expect of others what he expects of himself so i don’t think rowena would get the judgement she might bitterly prepare herself for

i think she would think it sucks that he’s never had elven community because losing it is something she really takes hard. he’d sort of gruffly be like “don’t bother i barely count” and she’s like lmao u think this is for u. i need to make an alienage recipe and u think i am going to do the hard work myself with ur muscles right there??? get stirring mr scruffy ears

also keir loves people who are smart. and who can go on impromptu lectures. rowena’s cunning score will win this. if we can just get her to stop being a cool girl for long enough to start explaining one of her niche skill sets like poisons or tailoring, she’d have him

[dramioneasks]

HP FESTS: Pumpkin Spice Fic Fest (Part 3)

Pumpkin Spice Fic Fest 2023:

daybreak, nightfall, & the moments that happen in between by gemgirl28 - E, one-shot - Hermione and Draco’s relationship is too new to tell any of their friends, but that hasn’t stopped him from finding a place in her life. She finds she quite enjoys starting and ending her days with him at her side. The thought should scare her, but staying away sounds worse.

on-again, off-again by sodamnrad - E, one-shot - Granger, Why does everyone think we’re dating? - Draco I’m handling it. –Hermione That doesn’t answer my question. Hermione starts a rumour, and Draco winds up with a pretend girlfriend. And when they break up, they can't help but get back together again, and again, and again.

Rivers of Whiskey and Honey by charingfae - E, one-shot - Draco has been pretending to date Hermione for two months and four days. Which, in his mind, is two months and four days too long, and one eternity short of long enough. He isn't prepared to run into her on his solo morning walk after their latest 'date'. Or for her to trail her fingers down his arm and lean in to kiss him... Cozy, fluffy, smut.

The Professor and the Librarian by So_scarlett_maroon - E, one-shot - The first time Draco saw her, she was sitting in a reading nook, flipping through a children's book. The sun was shining through the windows behind her, lighting up her brown curls to show off their golden highlights. He felt drawn to her. He wanted to walk right up and say hello that second, but Scorpius pulled him down an aisle. “I need a bunny book Dad!” he said, as he tugged Draco’s hand. --- Draco is back in the UK after years spent in France at Beauxbatons. He sees a woman at the Rowena Ravenclaw Public Wizarding library and is desperate to know more about her.

Natural As A Dream by simplifiedemotions - M, one-shot - She knows, she knows, she knows, and still she falls asleep in the comfort of his warm body, only waking up briefly so that he can take her home. She knows, she knows, she knows, that as he tucks her into bed and takes off her heels that he’s only being a good friend, so much as Draco Malfoy can be a friend to anyone. She closes her eyes and lets sleep take her, wishing that the hand that softly strokes her cheek is real. Or: Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy yearn for each other over the course of ten-plus years and several weddings.

Mayhem in a Maelstrom by Emma Jordan Hart (Wailzy) - E, one-shot - Near Halloween, the trio get stranded in an empty barn during a thunderstorm. Dreomione PWP, muggle!AU [Draco Hermione x Theo]

behind the façade of friendship by riddikulus_puff - E, one-shot - Hermione Granger was pretty sure that the deal settled between herself and her previously named "sworn enemy", Draco Malfoy, was a good idea. Friends with benefits always went one hundred per cent the way you wanted to and always worked out for the couple, right? The movies were proof that feelings would never develop and yet, of course, Hermione was stupid for thinking that things would be fine if Draco and Hermione just slept together. No strings attached. Yet, feelings were bubbling, the beginnings of everything that could destroy everything Hermione and Draco had tried hiding from each other.

Castle of glass by pinkhairandbooks - E, one-shot - His eyes stayed glued to the sky for less than two minutes before they slid back to the witch who had been ruling all his thoughts for years. He couldn’t stop himself: no matter how hard he tried his eyes always found her, even among a crowd of her doppelgangers his gaze would land on her, as if attracted by a magnet. The witch was curled up on her side, her right shoulder rising and lowering due to her regular breaths and, watching her so helpless and relaxed while sleeping, suddenly the urge to give in to his worst impulses became too strong. He drank three more long sips of Firewhisky and then stood up, checking to make sure that all the other participants in that sort of bonfire were asleep before stealthily approaching Granger’s sleeping bag

Catch and Release by WillowingScribe1709 - M, one-shot - Hermione and Draco meet at a farmer's market on a cold, rainy November morning. Coincidence? Surely not. Once he catches her, he has her. Let the chase begin!

Pulling Leaves Off Trees by hauntedde (excitedde) - M, one-shot - Hermione and Draco find each other across four Autumns. A scent obsessed little love story.

Home Sweet Hogsmeade by flowerfem - E, one-shot - Hermione didn't hesitate to return to Hogwarts for Eighth Year but when Draco Malfoy became her roommate, things became interesting. A short story focused on the immaculate vibes of first term at Hogwarts. Prompts: rain soaked, lingerie, roommates

Lovely Plan by VineHawthorn - E, one-shot - Jealous Hermione encounters a very smug Draco and smut ensues.

This fest is ongoing.

[coffincanary]

Transmasc Crowley is beautiful and I need more people to talk about it

Y'all aren't ready for the potential of transmasc Crowley.

Rowena doesn't really care about gender, and her son being trans was probably the only thing she ever respected in him. She didn't force Fergus to wear feminine clothing, she gave him a different name when he said he didn't like his old one, called him her son in the rare moments that she actually wanted to acknowledge that he existed.

When she left, Fergus got by, managed to pass because he had lived as a guy for long enough that no one remembered him before that. But it meant he was also more alone. Periods and their side effects, hormones, his body changing, he was left alone with that. Had to hide it and couldn't show anyone, because he was living as a guy. Puberty alone can be confusing and traumatizing, even more so as a trans person with no one there to help you.

At some point, he got pregnant with Gavin. And I think that would have played a HUGE part in their relationship. Fergus was already stunted in his emotional development, being abandoned and never being loved, always having to hide things. And then he gets pregnant. And his whole world probably comes crashing down, because he's pregnant and he doesn't want to be but he can't get rid of it, because he doesn't know how and can't really ask without revealing what is going on. So he is forced to be pregnant and give birth alone. And pregnancy/birth can already be traumatizing on their own. But if you don't want to be pregnant and also have to deal with crippling dysphoria during it? Crowley was messed up after the ordeal in the same way Rowena was, and it even more so affected his relationship with his son, because all Crowley could remember when he looked at his face was the pain and trauma of it all.

So, Crowley sells his soul. Just that selling his soul for a bigger dick isn't the whole story, he sells it for a man's body, so he doesn't have to hide anymore and never has to go through what he went through again. That doesn't fix him, doesn't fix what he feels when he looks at Gavin, but it helps.

When he died and became a demon, he definitely became more comfortable with his body and his identity. He now had control over it, because he could possess any body he wants. He can openly flirt and have sex and do what he wants to do, and his old body has no control over him. Of course, when he looks at Gavin, he still struggles. Can't quite shake the experience of it, but it gets better. Crowley is secure in himself, now, has regained control and also has people who are there for him, support him. He came so far from that frightened and lonely trans boy who gave birth among the trees at night. He can be himself.

[samsrowena]

moogs!!! I saw in your poll that you had ~unpopular~ thoughts about Rowena’s ending being becoming the queen of hell and I would be really interested to hear them if you wanted to elaborate!!! <333 if you’ve already talked about it somewhere then ignore me, I must’ve missed it, just link me to that maybe? love hearing your thoughts bestie - jo

HIII i'd be happy to!!! apologies in advance if this gets kind of rambly or incoherent lol

but okay so my main problem with it is that it just feels really reductive (which is on par with everyone else's ending but i digress). in theory i guess i get how it could feel like a full circle moment; she was introduced wanting the throne for selfish, evil purposes and then her story ends with her having the throne and using it for good. but in execution, i was not a fan. to start with, in 15x08 she seemed to revert to season ten rowena (but this is buckleming writing her so i shouldn't be surprised), bragging about everyone being afraid of her and then saying she wished she died a long time ago, as if all of her character development up until that point meant nothing

because i honestly just don't see any scenario in which she'd ever even want to become ruler of hell after season thirteen. she didn't care about power anymore. she'd been completely broken by lucifer and all she wanted was redemption. and i really despise the idea that sacrificing herself to save the world but then still being condemned to hell anyway was her being redeemed (of course she's not the only character they do this with; the message that you have to die for redemption/forgiveness runs rampant in the show and it sucks)

then there's the whole destiny thing. which is just like. i'm sorry but why in the hell would a group of people who literally call themselves "team free will" just accept that someone they care about is destined to die??? the only time they even allude at attempting to change her fate is at the end of funeralia but then they never even try. and in a season where their whole goal is to free themselves from thee biblical god's control, you would think they'd push back on the idea that her fate is set in stone a whole lot harder than they did (which is basically not at all). i just know in my heart that is so so so unlike them, especially sam after finding out he was the one who would kill her. this is the same guy who spent a whole season trying to save dean from certain doom (not to mention the countless other examples of him obsessing over saving people he cares about), so there is NO doubt in my mind he would've did the same for rowena

but i don't know, i mean i definitely understand the appeal of her becoming queen and maybe i'd be more open to it if they ended up doing more with it (and to their credit they apparently planned to, ruthie said at a con she was signed on for more episodes but covid ruined that) but at the end of day i just truly think she deserved so much more than being relegated to an eternity of doing a job that even her own son despised at the end

[payphoneangel]

📝 Writing Patterns Tag Game 📝

Rules: list the first line(s) of your last 10 posted fics and see if there's a pattern!

Oooh how fun! Thank you for tagging me @shallowseeker 💞 I'm going to go in reverse chronological order to see how my writing style has developed as well!

Universal Donor When Sam applied to Stanford, he needed an ID, a permanent one. He decided to use Bobby’s address as his own, that was the only way he could know any papers Stanford sent would get to him safely, without Dad or Dean seeing. He crafts his fake drivers license carefully and delicately. Brown hair, hazel eyes, 5’11,” 150 lbs. He hesitates, for a moment, then writes “M” under sex. He pulls the license number off some freshly dead citizen of Huron, SD, as Bobby instructed. He looks again at the template driver’s license online, checking for anything else he’d need to add. At the very bottom corner, a little red heart sits before the word “DONOR.”

If I Believe You Dean pauses as he’s putting on his shirt, noting his body in the mirror. He’s wearing only his boxers. His eyes glance across the familiar rolls and splattering of tattoos. The freckles and the sunspots and the barest hint of wrinkles. Cas tells him he wears his age well. Dean tells himself he wears his age well. His eyes linger on his chest.

take my hand (hold on forever) Leviathan are so fucking loud. Tendrils wrap around Dean’s arm and waist, hoisting him off the ground. Dean plunges his knife into its side, and as a ‘thank you’ it howls right into his ear and sends him flying through the air. Landing heavily, he both hears and feels the crack of his chest before his head slams into the ground, hard. 

there's no cell service in the afterlife Castiel draws in a pained gasp.  He has lungs again, a mouth again. He opens his eyes, and the spinning floor of the dungeon welcomes him as he falls to his knees. He looks to where the brick meets concrete, the last place he saw Dean, the look of remorse and terror still seared into Castiel’s mind. Cas hears a thump behind him. He turns around. 

Not Whole, Not Holy A simmering feeling of longing starts to well in Castiel’s chest. It originates in the deepest part of his core, radiating outward in waves and fading into a tingling restlessness in his fingertips. He lets out a pained sigh, rolling over onto his side. The sunset glares a bright orange hue into his small cabin through the window. He covers his face with his arm, shutting out the dusty twilight, and waits.

A Midsummer Night's Dean “Y’know, I think Timon and Pumbaa are gay.”  Cas hums, considering. “Why do you think that?” 

Prelude It was a straightforward order.  Castiel finds the car in a small Midwest town, with only Dean inside.

Ask Me Why My Heart's Inside My Throat “Cas, you got your ears on? We got a problem we could use your help with.”  Dean’s voice resonates deeply in Castiel’s Grace. With a thought he flies to Dean, finding himself on a weathered fishing boat on the East coast. The ocean slaps against its side. The sky is swimming with the promise of rain.

Spellbound It wasn’t like he planned for this to happen.  Rowena held out her hand to Sam. “The crow beak, if you would.”  He had every intention— good and pure intention— of following Rowena’s instructions. But when they were in the same room together, she seemed to know exactly how to move and talk and even blink in the most distracting way possible. 

Long Black Cloud Coming Down Something was wrong with Sammy.  Course, they had just salted a spec. It was a shotgun rockin’ dug out salt’n’burn. Dean couldn’t exactly blame him for looking worse for wear. But there was an edge to the way he hunched over himself in the booth. He was bent like a paperback, folded and frayed. He looked sallow. Dean worried his thumb against the side of the linoleum tabletop.  Maybe it was just shitty diner lighting.

If anyone is interested in reading any of these, here they are.

Ah how fun to see them all lined up like this! I learned to be punchier with my intros as I went. My first couple of works start with big blocks of text, but I started playing around more with paragraph length by Take My Hand. And with the last two, I finally figured out how to write in past tense! Only took me 8 tries lol.

I think I developed a pattern for intros as I went: Short, punchy action/dialogue, followed by longer paragraph to explain the setting/situation.

It's interesting to see which characters/dynamics struck my fancy at any given time. I started with Sam Insanity, took a nice long stroll in the Destiel Enchanted Forest, then returned to my roots with more Sam Insanity.

Tagging: @kingflups @cutemothman @bloodydeanwinchester @kerryweaverlesbian and anyone else who'd like to play!

[deanwbigbang]

That’s a wrap for Dean Winchester Big Bang 2022! Below the cut, you’ll find all the fics and art created this year! Check them out and leave their authors and artists some love!

See you next year!

Number One Preference by RogueTranslator | art by Solstheim dean x cas, T, 11.9k

CASTIEL, the Complex Artificial Symbolic and Tactile Intelligence capable of Emotional Learning, is a personal AI under development at The Sandover Corporation. In hopes of impressing the company’s leadership, Sam’s tech team spends the summer of 2032 installing CASTIELs in the homes of executives. Dean, a Senior Vice President of Marketing who happens to be Sam’s workaholic older brother, is one of those executives. Though Dean starts out skeptical of personal AIs, he and CASTIEL soon become fast friends, and Dean begins developing a new marketing strategy for CASTIEL that emphasizes the bonds between machines and humans. But when the board of directors finally makes good on a threat to shutter the CASTIEL program permanently, Dean has to rely on all his skills as a marketer to get them to change course and save CASTIEL.

fic | art

Through This Dark Tunnel by YohkoBennington | art by DWImpala67 dean x sam, M, 8.2k

After a hunt went wrong, Sam is left to pick up the pieces. Trying to put them back to who they were while considering a change in their lives proves to be a whole new set of obstacles he thought they were done with.

fic | art

broken glass (a million pieces of lumpy meat) by swordofsun | art by imjustgonnareblogthis dean x cas, T, 8k

Dean takes Jody's advice and allows himself to be broken. Just for a little bit.

fic | art

Final Days of Eden by tendency | art by ncdover1285 dean x cassie, T, 11.1k

Dean’s got a great girl he’s in love with, and he’s managing to split his days between working at a mechanic’s shop and hunting while still having plenty of time for Cassie. He could definitely see spending the rest of his life like this (if only he could stop feeling so guilty about the lies he has to tell her).

fic | art

Take the Long Way Home by Amypond45 | art by MidnightSilver dean x sam, M, 10.3k

Dean grew up an only child. When his parents die in a car accident, he returns to Lawrence to sell the family home and move on with his life. Then, one day, a Tall Hot Dude pulls up in a crappy used car.

fic | art

Enspelled by zaffre | art by R-ifann dean x cas, T, 5k

Rowena curses Sam for the Winchester’s involvement in Crowley’s death. Now it’s up to Dean to learn magic to save him. It’s just that easy and just that hard.

fic | art

Straight Boys and Queer Hearts by Out_of_nowhere | art by PetraAmia dean x reader, E, 6.6k

You have a one night stand with Dean Winchester, not expecting it to be anything more. To your surprise, Dean wants to see you again. The thing is, you know about guys like Dean, and how relationships with guys like him usually go.

fic | art

Figure It Out As I Go by jld71 | art by DWImpala67 dean x sam, E, 44.4k

After discovering that he’s pregnant with Sam’s pup and thinking that Sam doesn’t want him because Sam has never made the move to claim him, Dean decides to leave Sam and the safety of the bunker to start a life on his own with his pup.

fic | art

Summer Blues by MiracleofWinchester | art by art rover dean & sam, M, 11.2k

As Dean sits here alone in the dark of this summer's night, going through some sort of an introspection journey deep down memory lane _ as he’s finding himself doing more and more for a while now _ as he tries his hardest to make sense of things. Of memories. Yes, Dean thinks; hindsight is like looking through a sharp, new set of eyes. Sometimes disorienting, yet the closest thing to crystal clear. ——— Or Dean Winchester spends one summer night down memory lane. it's nothing much, just his entire life really. or maybe get would go through just a few key moments down the line.

fic | art

Hush by Squeevening | art by alexiescherryslurpy dean x benny, E, 9.7k

Here's what might have happened in Purgatory between Dean and Benny. This fic is a happy-for-now, because I've watched this show very carefully, *especially* the breakup scene between Dean/Benny and Sam/Amelia, shot with equal weight, where Dean says ADIOS - which he only says to lovers the morning after - and you cannot tell me Dean and Benny weren't CANONICALLY dating. :-D Anyways, this is sweet and hot and I found it incredibly addicting, not because of the sex, but because of how endearingly pathetic Dean gets before he figures out how to ask for it.

fic | art

Heaven is a Place on Earth by Bexgowen | art by Solstheimart dean x sam, E, 64.7k

Dean Winchester is a lonely, repressed ad-man whose only vices are his 1967 Chevy Impala and the sex worker he sees every week. When Anael unexpectedly cancels Dean's appointment with her at the Heaven and Hell themed brothel, Dean agrees to make an appointment with another of Heaven's angels. A male angel, who goes by the name 'Castiel', and who unlocks desires in Dean that he thought he had buried deep, deep down. But there is a darker side to Dean: a side that Dean discovers when he ventures down to Hell and meets a demon named Alastair. Will Dean listen to the angel on his shoulder and follow his heart, or will he succumb to the temptation of the demon on his back?

fic | art

The Michael Sword by deansmultitudes | art by zxro dean & cas, dean & michael, M, 6.3k

There’s no stopping the apocalypse. Best Dean can do is make sure that the slightly better side has a fighting chance once Lucifer wears Sam to the prom. He makes a decision—he’s going to say ‘yes’ to Michael. And there is nothing that can stop him; not Sam and Bobby locking him up in the panic room, and most definitely not Cas’s fists bruising his body, drawing blood, bouncing him around that dark alley like a rag doll.

fic | art

[castielmacleod]

I was reading that post about the 12x23 Crowley conundrum and. It’s not that I necessarily disagree with the actor man on his own character but……. lol I kind of do actually. I feel a bit insane over how he doesn’t seem aware of how. Soft? He actually played Crowley sometimes. I mean Crowley definitely likes winning, but idk you can’t convince me that it’s ALL he cared about, especially toward the end. And I think that the growth of the character from just wanting to win, along with the instances where he actually does care about other things are actually very important?

Like I actually do genuinely believe he cared about Rowena. Not on a personal level, maybe, but on a deep traumatised level where he is still desperate for her affection and approval despite everything. I do think that he felt so incredibly, painfully lonely and unloved that he formed a genuine romantic attachment to Dean that haunted him right up to his suicide. I don’t think he ever actually hated Cas at any point, and past season 8 he is actually an surprisingly reliable ally to Cas whenever Cas needs his help. And I truly believe that Crowley actually did on some level want to better himself, to be different. In 10x23 he says he thought that by doing better and making changes to himself then maybe he’d feel something again. He doses himself with human blood throughout season 9, also presumably to feel something—feel things more deeply, at least, than he’s able to as a demon. And of course 8x23 is where we learn that underpinning all of Crowley’s actions is actually an overwhelming desire to be loved. It’s actually kind of notable that it ISN’T the desire to win that comes up in that scene, because he could have had the same break down, cried about how he deserves to win, he just wants to win. It still would have been kind of sad, at least to me. But instead that scene was about love and it instantly added so much more dimension to him. And I think “ultimately just wants to be loved” is a way more deep and compelling thesis for Crowley than “literally does not care and only wants to win” could ever be.

Mark seems to have a very divided view of where Fergus ends and Crowley begins, and in some ways I agree—Fergus is not Crowley. But I think Crowley is Fergus. To me Crowley is, when it comes down to it, still the 8 year old boy who was abandoned by his mother all those centuries ago. You can literally see that little boy on his face when Rowena is talking to him sometimes. That’s why it’s like… even if Crowley thinks he doesn’t care about Rowena, even if he tries to compartmentalise her as Fergus’ mother, not his—he very much actually does care. Visibly. It’s weird to me that of all the people to not really recognise that, it’s the guy actually standing in front of the camera making it so that Crowley visibly cares. Not just about Rowena, but about Cas, and Dean. All people he can’t get over.

And I mean Crowley’s plotlines definitely started getting worse in his last few seasons. By which I mean just fucking awful and unbelievably stupid. They really did strip him completely of his cleverness and charisma and temper and it is a brutal defanging honestly. It’s hard to believe smug permasmile unblinking sits-in-chairs-backwards blatantly gay “under a frigging spotlight” clean-shaven Crowley is even the same physical person as later seasons Crowley and I don’t mean that in a “wow character development” way but in a “oh they literally just stopped writing him” way. And like I’m a very melancholy person so I actually don’t even hate the whole depressive spiral Crowley ends up in, it breaks my heart in just the right way and it’s part of the reason I am so especially attached to Crowley as it is (like I always loved him but as soon as they started making me THAT fucking sad about him. Whew.) I think his depression is something that could have been meaningful to his character development and actually done well if 1. it hadn’t come at the cost of at LEAST his smarts (and I know very well how depression can wipe the floor with you and hollow you out into a shell of your former self, but they literally could have at least let him keep his bloody wits about him if nothing else) and 2. it had actually been acknowledged by the show that yes, he is depressed, and 3. it had led into a real proper resolution to the redemption arc they literally put him on instead of letting it putter out into nothing by making the Winchesters continuously refuse to give him the time of day despite everything he kept doing and giving up for them. If the writers had kept ACTUALLY writing him then the depression would have felt purposeful and not this anticlimatic wasting away until Crowley just kills himself.

(Furthermore not a single one of his interactions with Lucifer should have happened and I mean not a SINGLE one. Just throw all of that out. At a minimum though if Lucifer were to end up in Crowley’s captivity then he would have hacked the bloody hell out of him like he did to Samandriel and Gadreel and that’s that.)

And…. please forgive me for saying this but I actually. God I’m sorry. I actually agree with removing the “even when I lose I win” line in the canon context of Crowley’s death. If Crowley had been better written in s12 I would have no issues but I cannot stress enough that there was literally no winning for him at any point in that season, and ESPECIALLY in his death. I very strongly read his suicide as due to him being miserable and repeatedly rejected by the people he cares about and I think that spell was a convenient excuse for him to get it over with. If that’s just my take then okay, but that is really how it comes off to me. And I mean the spell doesn’t even work right away—Lucifer still has time to come out through the portal and murder Cas before Mary pushes him back in but he literally could have escaped! (And later does escape, when the Winchesters reopen🫣 the portal 🫣🫣🫣 to rescue Mary). And ultimately it all makes Crowley’s entire sacrifice kind of pointless. I’m sorry to say that when he lost he lost. And I will never not be bitter about it

[liopleurodean]

The Road So Far: Season 10

Wow.

Really all I have to say about season 10, honestly. Wow. This season was chock full of amazing stories, and the overarching plot was extremely compelling. As far as best episodes, the first three start off strong with 1x01 Black, 1x02 Reichenbach, and 1x03 Soul Survivor. 1x05 Fan Fiction gets a ten out of ten, five stars, would absolutely watch again. 1x06 Ask Jeeves was a refreshing mystery a la Clue, and 1x12 About a Boy brings us an adorable young Dean. 1x14 The Executioner's Song is emotional and gives us a peek at what's to come with the Mark of Cain, and the final three episodes 1x21 Dark Dynasty, 1x22 The Prisoner, and 1x23 Brother's Keeper bring us to the conclusion of the arc in a fast-paced rollercoaster of a finale. Of them all, 1x05 Fan Fiction has got to be my favorite. I'm a sucker for music, and the comedy in this episode is unparalleled.

Aside from Dean, Charlie was the star of the show this season, and I'm still in denial about the end. Claire also got some time in the limelight, and she absolutely rocked it. I'd love to see her more in the future.

Of course we have to talk about Sam and Dean. Watching Dean spiral because of the Mark of Cain was horrifying, and despite the consequences, I'm glad that it was removed. Although Sam did some questionable things in his quest to remove the Mark, it could only compare to similar things that Dean did in earlier seasons. Ultimately, it paid off, although it cost Charlie's life in the process.

Looking forward, season 11 is all about the Darkness! Cas has his grace back, which means big things, and Metatron is on the loose again. Not only that, but Crowley is back in black and Rowena's loyalty is always in question. The war for Heaven may be over, but the Winchesters have plenty of adversaries to prepare for.

Overall, I think I'd rank season 10 pretty highly. Its light-hearted filler episodes are mostly packed into the beginning and sparse towards the back half of the season, but with the passing of the 200th episode (in a musical, no less) and the season's focus on character development, it really packs a punch.

I plan on starting strong with season 11 tonight, and I'm hoping the next few seasons will go as quickly as the first ones did. We're in the home stretch now. Carry on!

[icefire149]

Certain parts of season 14 and 15 just rub me the wrong way. Everything about the shift when Mary dies again to set up conflict between Dean and Cas just doesn’t hit right. So here’s a new way I’d do it:

Jack still accidentally murders Mary, but after zipping around the Earth in a panic, he goes to Castiel. He has no fear that he’ll lose Cas over this. It’s Sam and Dean that he’s worried about. Especially Dean since he was horrible when he was born. Dean only more recently seemed like he really cared about him. He can’t mess this up. Jack brings Cas back to the house and explains what happened. 

We know Cas is a strategist and his mind would be in overdrive, because of course the Winchesters weren’t going to be okay with any of this. Hell, he’s barely keeping it together. Mary was his friend. But, Jack is his child and responsibility. And he loves him too much to let him suffer. So he devises a plan: Nick was trying to summon Lucifer from the Empty. He was succeeding. Jack and Mary were trying to stop him and Lucifer obliterated Mary. Jack wasn’t quick enough but he was able to send Lucifer back into the Empty and in a rage killed Nick. Now Jack is panicking because it’s still his fault, but not his fault. It’s Nick and Lucifer’s. And Jack while being mostly soulless is still a bit hesitant to weave such a lie to their family, but he agrees. Cas reassures him that the Winchesters will be devastated, but they’ll understand better this way. As a family, all of them will be able to grieve and move on eventually. Because: Nick shouldn’t have done what he did. It was high tension and everyone was upset, and it was inevitable an accident happened. It was just a terrible accident. 

Distraught, Jack asks if there’s anything they can do to fix things? If they can bring Mary back? If they had a body....maybe. This leads Jack to want to see Rowena to see if she could just bring Mary back. They decide to try, but stick to the story. Cas gets zapped back to his truck and Jack goes to Rowena. So we have the similar situation where Jack in a panic tries to force Rowena to fix things and she tries, but also still tips off the Winchesters. Still the magic doesn’t work and Jack is scared. Sam and Dean get to the house and are a mess trying to make heads or tails of the mess. Automatically the blame is on Jack. They’ve been worried about his soul. He must have gone completely dark side. And we’ll note that Dean is the one crawling out of his skin pacing and ranting. Sam is more withdrawn. Jack flies into Cas’ truck when he’s almost there. Cas goes into the house first. He tells Jack to wait in the truck. Cas bars the doorway with his body while he tries to explain the ‘tale’ Jack told him in the car and how devastated he is over Mary and terrified of what they, Sam & Dean, will do next. 

Dean believes Cas. It’s Cas. His anger rolls into grief & tears. His mom died. How did he get here where he has to bury her again. Cas comforts Dean with soft touch and words. He’s sorry. He’s so sorry. Cas gives into his own grief a bit. It’s Sam that continues to stand there in quiet rage. It’s like his whole lifetime of trauma is torn open again. And now there’s this new angry wound that’s only festered since Amara brought Mary back. Yes, he should be grateful that he’s gotten to know her at all, but.....it was never right. She never stayed long enough to really know him. Emotionally her bond with Dean was always stronger. He was always just a fly on the wall. She was his mom too. And now...even Cas is crying more than him. When the hell was she ever anything to him? Sam’s anger spirals, but he’s trying to keep it down. He keeps going over the house there. Something about everything isn’t sitting right with him. There’s something off. He knows it. 

So with the funeral and going home to the bunker, things feel flipped. Jack and Cas were most worried about Dean, but it’s Sam they should be worried about. Dean is angry and upset, but he’s not blaming Jack. He’s actually trying to be there for Jack. This development has Cas over the moon, because this is all he ever wanted. For them to be a family. While Dean fell into the cycle of his father’s anger when Cas died s12/13....this time he’s being what he/John should have been. And Sam is the one sinking into John’s cycle of anger. Sam’s the one drinking a bit more. He’s quiet, but there’s an anger that’s clearly there. He’s distancing himself from Jack and Cas. Eventually he blows up and admits that he blames Jack and his soullessness. For all they know he hurt her / let her get hurt purposely. Which gets Cas angry and Sam flat out admits that he doesn’t trust Cas’ word. Something feels off to him, and this isn’t the first time Cas has tried to go behind their backs. He has quite the history of it. 

This causes Sam, Dean, and Cas to go at it yelling. Jack overhears some and blames himself for ruining everything again. He’s been nothing but trouble for their family. Maybe it would be better if he just left. So he does. This ties us back to Jack being manipulated by Heaven. Dean and Cas are out trying to find him. All ties back in to Jack goes home and finds Sam alone in the bunker. And it’s easy to fall back into the trust Jack has always had with Sam. He’s always had Jack’s back. And he manipulates Jack, telling him that they’ve worked out a spell to bring Mary back. They altered the malak box spell work to harness and focus Jack’s powers. It should be enough. Dean and Cas will be back any minute with Rowena. Jack eagerly believes him and does as he’s told. Jack gets in the box and he stares up at Sam nervous. Sam tells him that there’s nothing to worry about anymore. Cas told them everything. They can fix things now. And Jack looks at him confused, everything? Sam presses that yes, Cas explained how it was an accident. Jack breathes a sigh of relief and then crumbles into tears, how he didn’t mean to. He asked her to stop, but she wouldn’t give him a moment to breathe and then..it was an accident. He didn’t mean to hurt her. And cold as ice Sam goes, I know, and closes the lid. Locking the box. 

It’s a while before Dean and Cas make it back. Jack has enough time to completely unravel in his grief, and anger, and realization that Sam lied and tricked him. Everyone keeps manipulating him and lying. Dean and Cas get back and start arguing with Sam. Just like in the show, Jack breaks out and leaves. Sam still goes into it explaining the truth he got from Jack. Cas LIED. He covered up Mary’s death. He’s known the truth all along. Dean refuses to believe Sam. He’s mistaken. 

Things roll into Moriah and Jack makes it so no one can lie. And because of that the truth finally comes out of Cas’ mouth. And Dean breaks. He tells Cas that he’s dead to him. Cas leaves to look for Jack on his own. Dean’s fury goes in on Jack. He never should have gotten attached. Jack was always a monster. All of this rolls into Chuck’s return and manipulation. He pushes Dean to kill Jack. And the puzzle pieces click into place for Sam. He realizes how much this is all a game to Chuck. Chuck pulled the strings to make every bad thing that’s happened in his life happen just for his own entertainment: Mom, their childhood, dad’s shitty parenting, Jess, demon deals, demon blood, Dean going to Hell, Ruby, the apocalypse, visions, unanswered prayers, EVERYTHING..... Chuck’s newest episode of entertainment was causing Jack to accidentally kill Mary and have to live with the consequences of losing his only family over it. Sam’s anger goes directly into Chuck. 

He needs to get to Dean. Meanwhile Dean finds Cas and Jack in the cemetery. Cas gets between them and tries to talk Dean down. Dean is shaking with fury. He’s never been this mad before. He hated Jack for being born and getting Cas killed, and then he grew to love the kid as family, and he hates him for making him feel this much. He killed his mom, and lied about it. Cas tries to explain that he was trying to protect all of them. He was trying to maintain their family. Dean coldly goes, there’s no family here to maintain. I’m a hunter. Saving people and hunting monsters is the family business, and....I see two monsters in front of me. And he holds the equalizer up, shakily. Jack sends Cas flying so he can approach Dean. He understands what Dean has to do. He accepts it and he’s sorry. Jack gets on his knees and waits. Dean can’t quite do it. He’s trying.

Sam and Chuck get there. Sam starts yelling how Chuck set this whole thing up. Chuck is trying to make Dean do this...for his own entertainment. And everything rolls back into what the actual show did. Dean can’t kill Jack and Sam shoots Chuck. Everything continues to roll similarly as s15 did, but the divorce arc is leaning heavily on Dean is angry about Cas betraying him. 

[ladyluscinia]

Normally I just kind of roll my eyes at bad takes by bronlies, but the sheer cognitive dissonance in their approach to side characters has been really nagging at me recently.

I've seen too many "explanations" of why some non-Winchester is not worth attention and they tend to have pretty repetitive reasons: the character doesn't affect the plot, they have insufficient characterization, Sam and Dean barely know them / don't care, or they are random extra #6254. These points are usually exaggerated to absurdity, but that's the core of the problem with side characters. And bronlies will put it forth as reasoning why the show should have never bothered with side characters at all.

Ignoring, of course, that every one of those problems does exist, but as a direct result of Supernatural not treating its side characters like, well, normal side characters!

Side characters are supposed to affect the plot. They exist to fill supporting roles! Get called for backup. Deliver crucial info. Prompt protagonist actions. See Ruby and Cas in S4. It's impossible for two people + antagonists to move a story along.

Side characters are supposed to get minor character arcs. It's how you give the mains some breathing room and prevent the show from getting repetitive. It helps the viewers get attached. It's makes them more interesting. As a bonus, it often loops in the main characters, leading to...

Side characters should have well built relationships - platonic, familial, parental, whatever - with the main characters. Not necessarily structuring their lives around them, but friends should show up regularly. No one chooses to live in isolation just because. If you haven't established a strong in-narrative reason why your main characters wouldn't have any friends (and Supernatural doesn't) then it makes no sense for them not to care. And kinda makes them assholes for no reason.

And finally, not developing side characters normally and keeping them around still doesn't let you write a show without side characters. It literally just makes more of them. Every writer who needs a side character to fill a supporting role in their episode just makes one up if they don't have an established pool to pull from. Or they grab a character they liked from a previous one-off. Or they replace a character that got killed off, starting the development from scratch. Killing Kevin gives us Donatello. Ugh.

It's just... there is a reason shows do not have a two person cast. Can anyone point to any other show they think successfully pulled that off for more than a year or two??? Can they tell me how they think S4 would have worked as a plot with no Ruby or Cas (or Bobby or Anna or Uriel or-)? And why they think any season after that magically regained the ability?

Bronly hostility toward side characters (both in the fandom and the writing room) didn't change the necessity of having them, it just prevented the show from having good ones for most of it's run. And their frequent proposed solution is that the show should have given us more underdeveloped one-off characters instead of (rarely) bringing people back???

(And now I'm thinking how even the "good" side characters of Dabb era weren't allowed to do a lot of this either, despite getting more episodes. Society if Rowena was finally the replacement for Ruby's vacant supporting role and Sam actually got a Witch!Sam arc.)

Side characters exist for legitimate storytelling reasons. They aren't optional past a certain point. The only option is whether you handle them well, and why the hell would you choose bad decisions over good ones?

[fucktheroyals]

You know after reading and reading and reading peoples theories and the meta from before the spn finale aired and the meta writers reactions to the finale I think I have a theory of my own. We don't have any answers tho, so this is pure speculation. If you wanna add something to support or discredit any of this that's cool but there's too many things floating around. Know I dont have proof for this conclusion at all. A lot of what I say is just guesses based on previous facts.

This all came together in my head when I realized how much this finale REEKS of the original producers and who the show was originally for. It REEKS of Robert Singer. Like if the execs started saying they didn't want it, Robert Singer was the one pushing that the story was about the brothers. That kinda thing.

Then, I was thinking of the problems in this episode and it struck me these are all of Supernatural biggest issues and to be honest all of it feels completely deliberate.

Take the sexism for example, Supernatural in it's later seasons largely out grew this, we have Jody, Rowena, Donna, Charlie, Mary, Claire (and even a wayward sisters pilot with MORE women/girls) all making regular appearances. They're mainly good characters and mostly aren't there to hurt our boys. Rowena, of course, is the one outlier being very about herself but it's clear she still cares for them, I mean its part of her development. But they're all real, with character flaws just like everyone else. (And we have Death too and she was POC 😭 THANK GOD)

Now look at the earlier half of Spn, we have Ellen and Jo, who's appearances were far in between. There's Bela in season 3, recurring for quite a bit (5 eps), but she is a character that is only there for herself, definitely not found family (unlike Ellen & Jo), and she's got more episodes in season 3 than Ellen and Jo in season 2 who aren't seen again til season 5. The "fans" send in hate mail after hate mail to try to get these characters off, and eventually they are. Then there's Ruby who's character stayed for a whole two seasons and was a largely recurring character. Why does she get to say so long? She's a plot device. She's supposed to be there to betray Sam. She has to stay (plus Jared obviously likes her). But she's not just a character the writers like writing about. Same with Lilith. Obviously not as recurring but still a plot device. Did they get hate mail tho? You can bet on it. Why? because tHeY'rE gOnNa PuSh ThE bOyS (Dean and Sam) aPaRt ThE sHoW iS aBoUt ThE bOyS oNlY. Without even thinking about the hate mail, just notice how large the difference is from how women are seen in the earlier seasons to the later seasons. Misha got tons of hate mail too for being a character that could split up the boys (probably only being allowed to say because he a man, thanks sexist producers and execs).

Only after Castiel was killed off and then Castiel fans successfully (thank you guys) got him back on the show did the hate mail largely simmer, which means female character's were allowed to stay! Which has lead us to a show with a good amount of female characters. But can you imagine having to kill characters off time and time again because people keep complaining that the show is "only about the boys." Fun times really.

So now we get to this final and we see sexism. But it wasn't just the plain old regular sexism you find in the earlier days of spn. Because now, there ARE women to talk about, talk to. But this episode was DESOLATE women wise, unless they were used for plot (which is also sexist!). Small scenes, they're barely there. Women gets her tongue cut out. Random women from s1 gets killed. Sam doesn't SPEAK of Eileen. Nothing. No mention of any female characters from the boys mouths unless they were from/in this episode itself. That's WIERD. I know we've all said it. But that goes beyond forgetting about characters. I mean its SAM'S GIRLFRIEND for Christ's sake. There is NO REASON they couldn't have said Eileen's name. Notice how Sam's wife is just... faceless. This is literally an age old sexist trope. Like... one of the things about bringing Mary back to life for s12+ is that it takes this trope... of basically a generic mother, and gives her life and feelings, whether you like them or not, they're real feelings. They said Mary isn't just a mom she's a person. Mary's existence in the later half of spn is to fix this kind of female tropes that fall upon her character, to not let these her stay a 2 dimensional character. They said we should know she's more than just the mom who tried to save her kid. Do that is the exact opposite of Sam getting a nameless, faceless wife. The sexism of the old spn wasn't just brought back, it was completely amplified. It wasn't just accidental or some exec "fixing" the story it was DELIBRATE. Whoever wrote that, didn't do ALL OF THAT by accident. Because an exec or a producer who doesn't see the flaws in old supernatural isn't going to write it that deliberately.

Let's bring it back to s10 when Charlie was killed (singer was mainly to blame). Dead in the bathtub, age old classic of burying ur gays. If you were here you know people never let Supernatural live that down. THEY KNOW what bury ur gays means. Hell, Robbie Thompson left because of Charlie's death and you think the writers don't know what it means? I mean both Bobo Berens (especially) and Steve Yockey's careers are centered around LGBT+ storytelling and you think they don't know? They know. They know.

And Dean wasn't just apart of the bury your gays trope, it is so far BEYOND that. Dean being killed on a rusty nail/screw, the tongues ripped out, things that seemed to be meant for other people. Jensen's acting in the last two episodes was giving us "DEAN RECIPROCATES" but no one ever actually saying it. I think it's clear that Dean was killed for being Bi. They didn't address it for a reason, they just silenced him. His narrative was supposed to be about letting him be HIM for the first time, to say what his feelings are instead of having them miscommunicated, and instead of doing that, they just silenced him. And the more we look at this scene the more horrific it gets. The more it's a complete slap in the face and it's supposed to be. Some guy who knows nothing about the LGBT can't write a scene this horrific.

Some guy who knows nothing about Dean couldn't write a scene that deconstructs all of Dean's character development and gives Dean his worst nightmare. I MEAN DEAN WANTED TO LIVE HIS LIFE! THEY DIDNT HIDE THAT JOB APPLICATION (or whatever job related thing that was) IN THERE FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES THEY WANT YOU TO KNOW THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST SITUATION. Dean isn't Barney from HIMYM. If you watched HIMYM then you'll know Barney went from being a stereotypical ladies man and treating women terribly to being in love with a women and treating her right and working hard for it. The last episode of HIMYM (why its so bad) Barney's character development is thrown out and he's back to being a stereotypical ladies man. You don't need to know Barney's character very much to do that.

To kill Dean during a hunt his father never finished, to not have anyone at his funeral, to have Dean die young like his life didn't matter. Those are Dean's worst fears and you'd only truly know that if you watched the gin episode in s3, where they are basically laid out for you. You HAVE to know Dean's character to tear him apart like this.

This episode took all the core elements of the show and did a complete 180° the name of the episode itself is "Carry on" and Dean and Sam very much did not carry on. Sam grieving his entire life so that he good get to heaven and see Dean again. Dean being ready to live his life, despite the enormous pitfalls and learning to love himself only to be killed. "Family don't end with blood." Um.... it did in that episode either literally with Dean's death or you know BECAUSE NONE OF THEIR FOUND FAMILY WAS THERE. Not Jack, Not Cas, Not Eileen, Not Donna, Not Charlie, Not Jody, Not Claire... on and on we go. No one was there, nobody was even mentioned. Dean's funeral, no one even called that we know of. It was just Sam and Dean. Sam and Dean. And Bobby. Don't forget Bobby. But yeah Sam and Dean.

That's what the show is about right, the brothers.

Except it's not anymore. It hasn't been for years.

Cas not being there was deafening but it brought us to a major point. Becky. Becky's telling us about the terrible ending.

And many of us are wondering why would they literally tell us this is the worst ending and then... make it the ending.

Now before we move on, it very apparent many of you think Dabb doesn't ship Deancas. And Dabb doesn't care about the characters.

Say what you will about any plot holes in his writing, the point he is VERY GOOD at writing the characters, and giving us good ones.

Why do we know Dabb ships Deancas? (ill say when its cowrote, other wise its not) cowrote ep 8.02 - purgatory "I prayed to you, Cas, every night" "Cas, Buddy, I need you." "I have a price on my head, and I've been trying to stay one step ahead of them, to – to keep them away from you." 8.08 Hunteri Heroici - Cas helps them hunt! 😊❤ Dean & Cas have a serious convo about why Cas doesn't want to see/go to heaven. 8.22 Dean's mad at Cas. Sam's explanation of why Dean should be easy on Cas: "It's Cas." Dean then points out how he'd knife anybody else if they did what Cas did. 9.10 - Cas comforts Dean when Dean can't take seeing Sam (Gadreel) being tortured anymore. Also tons of Cas. 9.20 (bloodlines) - Canonical couple parallel "I was there, where were you" 9.22 The angels make Cas choose between them and killing Dean and he "gave up an entire army for one guy" 10.09 Claire's reintroduction. Cas heavy ep. DeanCas date. 10.22 THE PRISONER - u know the ep where Dean beats the shit out of Cas but loves him enough to not kill him.

We COULD keep going but I think I've made my point. If Robert Singer is the guy that is like "the show is about Sam and Dean only" Andrew Dabb is the DeanCas shipper. And you could even say a Cas stan.

Notice! How in s13 for SEVEN episodes we have a story that revolves around Dean's grief about losing Cas. Notice! How often the stories in all these seasons have a focus on their relationship. THAT is Andrew Dabb. If it weren't for him doing that, we wouldn't be able to easily say after Dean's lack of a response to Cas' confession, that Dean reciprocates.

To me, when I was (binge) watching s12 for the first time, I thought damn this is really got a lot of DeanCas. So I went to look at who was in charge, who was writing. I saw Andrew Dabb, associated him with Deancas episodes, saw all the new writers, Bobo, and then I saw that Yockey is known for same sex stories and it clicked. Dabb assembled a team to give us Destiel. THAT WAS IN SEASON 12!!!!!!!!

The amount of people saying he's homophobic flabbergast me. Open your eyes! That isn't what's going on.

Imagine making a show and trying to right all the wrongs of Supernatural. Imagine trying to write the greatest love story ever told and you have the entire season planned out for it to end off beautifully, it may possibly be your greatest achievement when it's done and then boom. someone comes in and tells you you aren't allowed to make Dean bi or make destiel endgame, after he was most probably already given the go ahead.

Sure. You could imply he's bi or into cas still in a way. Still make nice-ish ending. just give everyone what the kinda want.

Or you could scrap the last season, nothing close to a canonical bisexual Dean Winchester or Deancas endgame in site. People can be done with it be happy with the show, continue to live their lives in ignorance as to how close they were to Canon destiel.

OR you can lead everyone to the very closest you can get them to what you were aiming for and then show everyone the ugly truth and reality. Light it all on fire. Burn the show to the ground in your wake. Try your darnedest to making these people's (the people saying no) pockets suffer. Show us, the audience, what happened. Show us what this show really is.

I've seen people talk about the ending being changed during covid but I dont think that happened. I think what happened was Dabb already had this season planned out before it even started. Obviously the details were wobbly but it was all lead up to this ending. Destiel endgame, Canon Bisexual Dean, whatever it was. They were ready to write the greatest love story ever told and then someone shut it down.

Imagine the pain that must have caused them to be told no when they already said yes. They must have been so excited to give this to us.

I think someone (some producers) told him what this show is "really" about. The brothers. Can you imagine, after being told no, some kinda bullshit like this is said to you: "Why aren't you bringing it back to the brothers, Andrew? that's what the shows about. What with all this homosexual stuff, you know the audience won't like that. Not really." Imagine the original producers pushing this kind of view on you. "You know when we started it was Sam and Dean. It should end with Sam and Dean." That kinda sounds like someone huh? huh.

So why give us a nice acceptable finale, when you can take every problem Supernatural's had either up front or behind the scenes and create a finale so incredibly bad that people don't want to watch it anymore.

Someone made a good point about how Sam was originally supposed to be the main focus (this isn't to put any hate on Sam or Jared). Dean and Sam are the main characters but Sam was supposed to be the focus and for Dean to have become the focus, must have annoyed the producers because... well here we are. They wouldn't listen to Jensen. The producers liked this ending. Jensen's opinion didn't matter to them.

In some ways, if this is really what happened, it can be seen as childish from Dabb. To hurt all of us like that. Yes, he's hurting the producers, the execs, the cw. But to hurt us? Yeah it stings.

But in other ways, if this is really what happened, this is Dabb showing us the muck and gunk under the shiny surface. The hate for Misha. The hidden hate for Jensen. The underlying sexism. The underlying homophobia. The people REALLY in charge don't care about us, they just want our money. He needed to open our eyes and free us, at least free the people that he was writing for. The people he sees that care about this show.

This is the ending the powers that be wanted and its a big fuck you for a reason. I dont think this is Dabb spitting in our faces for loving this show, I think this is him trying to get revenge for us.

But from here, you can see it how u want it. If this is really what happened, I'm not in charge of your emotions, if you wanna be mad be mad if you wanna be grateful be grateful. And you don't have to believe me either I said this is speculation.

Also, as for all of the rumors like there being shots to the confession scene that we didn't see, which Jensen himself implied, I think that might have been a last ditch effort to canonized DeanCas but obviously it was cut. Like the name change was pretty clear. As for Misha possibly having shot some stuff for 20 I dont know what to tell you. If it's true I dont know where the blame would lie.

I do think however, that if all this was the case, the writers were prepared to become villians here. I mean they told us the writers were villians with Chuck right? So. Who knows what went down so they could give us such a vile ending. It could've been the producers or the writers, who truly knows. I do think tho that people we "trust" did some pretty shitty things to push the narrative in certain directions so now one would see this as the actual ending that was coming.

So again do with my SPECULATION what you will. This was in no way meant to put Dabb on a pedestal or anything. Just meant to give a bit of perspective.

(Also Jensen didn't unfollow Dabb recently he was already unfollowed for years)

[siswritesyanderes]

How would the first meeting between Sadie and the founders be, what does he think of her???

Thank you for this question!

I want to say that Sadie and the founders meet at a magical library, but in Quite Harmoniously I said/implied that it's uncommon to see a lot of magical books in one place, unless you're very rich- which, granted, I made up for the sake of emphasizing the importance of Hogwarts and for character purposes, but I'd like to be consistent without requiring Sadie to be inordinately wealthy, lol.

So here's how I'm thinking this plays out.

Rowena goes to some wizarding dine-in establishment or gathering place to read in solitude; she brings a lot of books with her, and she forgets one when she leaves. Sadie finds the book, and on the inside cover is written something like "This book is the property of the Hufflepuff estate". (Rowena has borrowed the book from Helga.)

Sadie goes to Hufflepuff manor to return the book. The founders are still living in Ravenclaw manor together, like in Quite Harmoniously, but Helga's house elf sends for Helga to floo over, and she brings Rowena along as well, since she's the one who forgot the book. Sadie basically goes, "Hello, I'm here to return this book to you, but also I wonder if I could borrow it one day? The title sounds awfully fascinating." (It's the old-timey equivalent of a psychology book.)

Helga is enchanted by Sadie's politeness and ethics; she could have just kept the book long enough to read it and then returned it after, but she brought it straight back to her and asked for a chance to borrow it!

Rowena is enchanted by Sadie's clear interest in what most would consider a boring subject; she would love to have long, deep discussions about it with someone as engaged as she is. To discuss each chapter in detail...even debate the conclusions drawn...

Helga says that of course Sadie can read it, once Rowena is done.

Rowena says that Sadie can read it whenever she wants, as often as she wants; all she has to do is come and visit Ravenclaw manor, and she can read anytime, and Rowena will serve refreshments (Fidelius will serve refreshments.) and they can talk about it.

Sadie gladly agrees. She visits Ravenclaw manor nearly every day, and she and Rowena have a mini-book club. Helga sits with them, because she enjoys their energy, she likes seeing Rowena so happy, and...and she finds herself so transfixed by Sadie's animated, brown eyes, and her sincere smile (her lips!), and the way she periodically tucks her hair behind her ears...

While she's there, Sadie meets the other two.

Godric introduces himself pretty early on; if two out of the house's four human occupants are meeting with someone for hours, on an almost-daily basis, he would like to meet that person as well. It's that or bother Salazar. (Well, it's that and bother Salazar; he makes time for both.) He sits in on the little book club meetings and flirts, cracks jokes, or just zones out watching Sadie express her thoughts.

Each time she leaves the manor, he offers to walk her home, but she politely declines, saying she's sure she'll manage. (She's not even connected to the Floo network!) He preoccupies himself, wondering if she's in danger, or worse: meeting someone else! Someone (obviously) less handsome and chivalrous and clever than him, but she might fall for his wiles all the same, the poor thing.

He's much less distracted when he knows she's in the manor, taking about the human mind with Rowena.

Salazar doesn't introduce himself for a while, but he's eavesdropped and slipped covertly into the room before, so he's already developed an attachment to Sadie by the time she first lays eyes on him. He's even followed her home a couple of times. He likes that she's so smart and finds it endearing and almost funny that she's so principled. So bogged down by these abstract concepts of honesty and fairness, but not at the expense of intelligence. When he kisses the back of her hand, in greeting, his lips linger just a bit.

The founders begin to notice that they all have feelings for Sadie. After discussing it awhile, they realize that the current arrangement is inefficient; they aren't satisfied by their exposure to Sadie, and they aren't able to continue in their studies or their work at the preferred pace. So, one day, when Sadie visits to read, the refreshments are spiked with a sleeping potion. She wakes in a soft, expensive nightgown, in a soft, expensive bed.

When they explain to her that they have agreed to abduct her, she inquires about the nature of their agreement. She wants to know everything that they have agreed about, with regards to her. Eventually, Rowena hands her the treatise they wrote on the subject, and Sadie reads the whole thing. (They all sit in silence, watching her eyes scan the document. Watching her eyebrows periodically quirk in surprise. Silence, interrupted only by her intermittent sounds of interest, dismay, distaste, and bemusement.) When she's done, she says, "I would like to object to a number of these settlements. I don't think it's fair that I haven't been allowed a voice in this matter."

She isn't able to talk them down from kidnapping, despite her valiant efforts, but she is able to negotiate a lot more freedoms for herself. She can leave the manor at will, but she will be accompanied or followed by at least one of them, and they will always make sure she returns. In fact, besides the stipulation that she has to live with them, she can pretty much do whatever she wants. She can outright tell people in public that they've kidnapped her; they'll just obliviate those people when she's done. She's allowed to keep her wand, though Salazar does check her most recent spells whenever he feels like it. She does not permit Rowena to practice Legilimency on her, but she does agree to cast some of her memories into the Pensieve, for Rowena to see.

(Now, you may be wondering: Why have Rowena borrowing Helga's book instead of just having Rowena lose her own book, or Helga lose her own, or have Helga lose a book loaned to her by Rowena- since that would have gotten Sadie to Ravenclaw manor more efficiently. The answer is that I wanted Helga and Rowena to be directly involved in Sadie's return of the book, since I knew it would be so attractive to both of them, and I knew that Helga would be much less likely to absentmindedly forget a book in a public place than Rowena would, especially if the book were loaned to her. So while, for streamlining purposes, I would rather Helga have forgotten a book borrowed by Rowena, so that both of them could get involved and Sadie could go straight to Ravenclaw manor, I didn't think it in-character for Helga to make that kind of mistake with an object she does not own.)

[mad-as-a-box-of-frogs]

Constantly driven insane thinking about Rowena’s sacrifice in 15x03 compared to Castiel’s sacrifice in 15x18. Like Cas’s confession is 100% about romantic love, we all know this even when we have to continuously fight people with heteronormative googles that it is romantic, that Dean clearly reciprocates from what we’ve been shown this season, this entire run since at least s7. Cas dies specifically to save Dean and Dean alone.

15x03 pointedly pairs Destiel off with Samwitch, but for whatever reason the romantic text for the latter seems to be killed off this episode along with Rowena herself. Rowena says she doesn’t believe in love, she believes in magic (arguably backtracking on her character development, but that’s another post). She’s sacrificing herself to save the world, not just Sam specifically (like Cas’s sacrifice, the cruel twist is that her sacrifice is only a temporary stopcap. Chuck still returns to wreak havoc; Dean still dies in the finale). And yet...despite the words that come out of Rowena’s mouth, about how she’s doing this for prophecy, her final scene with Sam still has inherently romantic vibes. Sam is the only one the can kill Rowena, as Dean (and the happiness he gives Cas) is the only thing that can kill Castiel. Rowena cups Sam’s face, says “That’s my boy.”

It’s not “I love you” ... and yet at the same time, it really is. It’s the last tender moment they have between each other, the climax of their relationship. The show declined to bring a romantic Samwitch relationship into text, bringing Eileen back three episodes later, and yet by so deliberately paralleling it to Destiel, both in 15x03 and retrospectively, it’s still impossible to not see the potential they could have had.

And much like destiel in 15x18, the scene is mostly forgotten (besides a brief mention in 15x06). Sam does get to see Rowena again, and Rowena hand waves away his guilt, and any emotional continuity from 15x03 is killed stone dead. Rowena is more or less removed from the narrative with an empty position of power, removed emotionally from Sam and the narrative continues on without her. Several episodes later, Castiel’s confession is never mentioned by Dean, despite his obvious pining in 15x19. Cas is possibly brought back in 15x20, handwaved into a position of empty power (Jack’s assistant? Idk) but the emotional continuity between him and Dean isn’t addressed, and the story ends with the confession as the climax and ending (more or less) of their story.

Like no we will not make your m/f ship textually canon despite having enemies-to-friends-to-fake married-trope development over the course of 5 seaons, but we will heavily parallel it to the m/m ship that we will make kinda sorta canon later on in the season, and in the finale neither of those ships will be mentioned (nor will we mention the other m/f ship we torpedoed the original m/f ship for). We are a very sane show

[etzrnalbliss]

hogwarts foundation #6 founders × teachers

I feel like Godric would teach DADA (sometimes along with Salazar, whom he was still good friends with). As the greatest duellist of his time with considerable talent in martial magic, students would particularly love his class, and they would help him create the first hogwarts' duelling club. Scared of absolutely nothing, Godric wouldn't hesitate to bring weird/dangerous creatures or objects to class - Rowena would probably yell at him for being an unconscious professor. He would be a sort of father figure the kids could rely on, he would always listen and encourage them to overcome their fears. He would also teach Muggle Studies until they recruited another professor. He'd definitely be the type of teacher that knocks at the door of any classroom with his keys swinging in his hands, waves silently with a smile on his face to the students and stops the class just to gossip with the professor (i really hope you see what I mean lmao). He would do that to Salazar a lot, just to annoy him - and that would work.

Rowena would teach divination : according to legend, Rowena dreamt about a warty hog leading her to a cliff by the lake where she and her companions would build Hogwarts. Since then, she decided to work on that subject and discovered a hidden talent in this field. She would also teach astronomy, which she had a strong passion for since her childhood. Strict but very caring to her students, she'd definitely be the «McGonagall» type of teacher. Every student coming out of Hogwarts would tell their little sibling she was the best teacher in the school. (I feel like she could teach Charms too, but honestly, is there anything she couldn't do ? (yeah keep her daughter alive lol (sorry that was a bad joke, very uncalled for, rowena ily))). Probably the most reponsible professor out of the four founders, taking her role very seriously. Yet her lessons weren't boring at all : with some creativity and adaptation to the students, she knew she could make anything interesting.

Helga would teach Herbology, her favourite part of the subject being taking care of the plants and walking with her students outside to observe the environnement (that's why she could also teach the Care of magic creatures, she knows everything someone could know about the biodiversity in the magic world). Each year, she would ask the students to make a herbarium with everything they could find around Hogwarts. The students would see her as the nicest teacher - I mean who could hate her?? Very empathetic and understanding, she would help the students get self-confidence and would teach them that honesty was the key to good relationships and understanding of life in itself. I think she'd be the kind of teacher that winks at you with a smile when she sees you do something stupid, and prays that Rowena won't hear of it. She'd also be the kind of professor to stop her class just to tell students about her life and proceed to make it a philosophical speech (in a cool way tho)

Salazar would teach potions or transfiguration. Salazar was said to be one of the greatest wizards of his age, with extensive magical abilities : teaching laborious subjects such as potions or transfiguration fits him perfectly. He wouldn't be the most appreciated professor, especially since he disliked Muggles and was very strict. But he would encourage the students to go beyond their limits and to develop their ambition : the only thing he wanted was for his students to succeed. He's that type of teacher who smiles so little that making him laugh would be the event of the century - the students would try their best everyday and would make all kind of jokes to get a hint of a smile. He would be aware of that, of course, and he would take malicious delight in pretending not to understand the jokes. (funfact : at first, he refused to be the DADA professor - what kind of Slytherin would fight against the Dark Arts ? - but he eventually joined Godric during the classes about magic creatures such as werewolves or vampires and would have fun, even though he wouldn't admit it.)

The other subjects would be teached by founders' friends or famous wizards from all around the UK.

[prince-of-elsinore]

Sam and Dean: psychological analysis and headcanons

In response to this anon ask from the 66 SPN Questions:

6. Do you have any psychological headcanons (or canon interpretations) of the characters?

Anon, this is probably not what you asked for. But I started writing, and kept finding more I wanted to say, until I thought--why not just say it all? And by all, I  don't actually mean all--this is by no means exhaustive. But it was a wonderful, self-indulgent opportunity to organize my thoughts on Sam and Dean's psychologies, and even find some new ideas as I was writing, and to put them out there so others can read and discuss. (Always happy to discuss any of this! Inbox is open.)

As a disclaimer, I know most of these thoughts are probably not original and may be retreads of many things fandom has been discussing for years. I'm not claiming to be breaking new ground here. Also, I sorta float backwards and forwards chronologically in my discussion--some parts pertain more to them when they're young, some to when they're older, and I don't always clarify which. Also, these are generalizations! I point out patterns I notice; that doesn't make them all hard and fast rules, because Sam and Dean are each human and complex!

Here's what you'll find below:

1. Core motivations 2. Happiness 3. Approval and secrets 4. Approval from authority figures 5. Need and attachment re: others 6. Sympathy and empathy 7. Walls—hiding vs. performing 8. Need and attachment re: each other 9. Ambitions and goals 10. Normality and monstrosity 11. Guilt and self-loathing 12. Autonomy and sacrifice 13. Personal identity 14. Concluding observation

1. Core motivations: Dean’s purpose is to protect Sam, obviously. Sam’s purpose, though a little less clear, is to save Dean. Sometimes it’s explicit, as in s3 and s9-10. But I think Sam also wants to save Dean, in general, from himself and from the life. It’s why he pushes against Dean’s obedience to their father. It’s why he tells him to get out and go to Lisa after he jumps in the Cage. At a certain point, I think Sam accepts he can’t “save” Dean without changing who he is, so he chooses to stick by him—because at least then he can make Dean happy.

2. Happiness: Dean’s happiness—or perhaps contentment is a better word—is knowing that Sam is safe and alive. Sam’s happiness is Dean being happy. In Sam’s world, things are good when Dean’s good. I think that, conversely, Dean wants Sam to be happy, and Sam wants Dean to be safe, but they both know and to an extent accept that those things are not within their control, so they focus on what they feel they can control.

3. Approval and secrets: They are each other’s north stars, guiding principles, in different ways. For Dean it’s “look out for Sammy,” for Sam it’s “what would my big brother think/do.” Dean doesn’t need Sam’s approval. Sure, he loves it when Sam admires him, but if he feels he needs to do something against Sam’s approval, he doubles down because approval from Sam is not the top priority. He’ll do what he thinks is right, especially to keep Sam safe, no matter what Sam thinks about it. Sam, on the other hand, does crave Dean’s approval and cares very much about his opinion. It doesn’t mean he won’t go against Dean (all the conflict of s1-5!), but it affects him differently. This leads to different kinds of secret-keeping: Sam goes behind Dean’s back to avoid his disapproval; Dean goes behind Sam’s back so that Sam doesn’t interfere with what he thinks needs to be done.

4. Approval from authority figures: Dean does crave approval from others—specifically, respected authority figures. The big one is obviously John. I think in a way it’s Mary, too, when she comes back. But it only applies as long as the person has his respect. Sam doesn’t crave approval from other authorities in the same way, perhaps because his primary authority figure growing up was Dean.

5. Need and attachment re: others: Sam is the only person Dean cannot live without, but he also makes outside connections of a friendly nature fairly easily. He’s the more socially outgoing brother who latches onto people like Gordon, gets friendly with Ash, and forges connections with Jo and Charlie, just to name a few (and Castiel at times—though their relationship is so inconsistent and often convenience-based I hesitate to include it in this category). Though Sam is Dean’s core need, I do think Dean thrives with other friendships. I’m not talking about found family, though I’m well aware of Dean’s tendency to call people “family” quite readily. Honestly, I think this is a manifestation of his craving for connection with others. Dean has an affectionate and playful nature, and let’s face it, Sam isn’t always super receptive to that—so naturally, Dean seeks out people who are. (I think this is also, in some cases, related to Dean’s craving for approval from others). Of course, none of those other relationships come close to the depth of his relationship with Sam, and when his relationship with Sam is at its best, I don’t think Dean really needs anything else to sustain him. But in reality, it can’t always be at its best.

Sam, on the other hand, doesn’t forge outside connections easily—but when he does, they tend to be deeper than Dean’s easy casual associations (even when Dean has real affection for someone, he tends to keep the tone of the relationship light). It’s pretty clear Sam was a loner kid, and I imagine it took him a while to find friends at Stanford, and even though he loved Jessica he still clearly kept many secrets. That’s the thing with Sam—he’s got walls. Dean’s got his own walls, but they’re different. Sam can seem emotionally open, but he protects his innermost self very carefully and rarely puts his emotions out there in a truly open way—even less than Dean does. I think this is a consistent personality trait for Sam, not one born of trauma (though perhaps exacerbated by it at times). In fact, it’s in later seasons that I see Sam finally, in rare moments, let down those walls, with Rowena and Jack. When he’s young, I think this was partially a coping mechanism he developed for hiding his desires/feelings, even from himself, because he was so unhappy with his life. It means that even though he’s an introspective guy, he’s not as self-aware as he thinks he is until he’s older and more mature. He’s very good at self-deception when he’s young, because as a thinker, he can convince himself of just about anything.

To circle back to attachment, what this means to me is that Sam, while he certainly appreciates close friendships and has a lot to offer those he cares about, doesn’t crave friends in the way that Dean does. I think he desires to be understood (this is a natural human need) but he’s much more comfortable with himself than Dean is, and is somewhat of a loner by nature. This means he’s also not (usually) going to be too affected by the status of his relationships with others. Dean is much more volatile and easily hurt by others (this is where Castiel is a great example).

6. Sympathy and empathy: On the surface, Sam appears to be the caring, sensitive brother, while Dean is brash and insensitive. This is a very incomplete picture, however. It mostly comes down to the difference between sympathy and empathy. Empathy is an involuntary response, whereas sympathy is something that a person chooses to express, though that doesn’t make it necessarily superficial—it also comes from an emotional place. Dean tends to be more empathetic, and Sam more sympathetic. Dean, despite his performative walls, is more easily affected on a visceral level by others’ emotions. He is more sensitive, more easily hurt or swayed to anger, and also more easily experiences empathy. This has nothing to do with what Dean thinks is right—it’s another involuntary emotion. He is sometimes moved to express this feeling, but he’s not generally concerned about appearing sympathetic. Sam, with his careful emotional walls, isn’t generally so viscerally affected by others, but he is kind. This is expressed as sympathy, because he cares about others’ feelings, and he wants to be good/morally right. On the one hand, it comes from an intellectual place—“it’s socially acceptable/morally right to express care for this person” (which Dean is less likely to care about)—and on the other, it is an emotional response—“I know what that feels like”—but a more regulated one than empathy, where one almost directly experiences another’s emotions.

7. Walls—hiding vs. performing: It’s interesting that both brothers have their own walls, which they construct as a form of self-preservation, but they have different levels of effectiveness in protecting themselves from outside influence. One difference might lie in what the walls were built in reaction to. Sam built his walls at a young age to separate himself from the outside world because, ironically, it was precisely what he desired, but was not allowed to have. He therefore consciously distanced himself from it, to dull the pain of not having it. The goal of those walls was to have something to hide behind, where he could remain generally unnoticed, so he could conceal his pain from outsiders and even from his family.

Dean took a little longer to build his walls—or at least to consciously do so. He already no doubt fashioned himself after his dad as a kid, and often put on a brave face—for Sam, for his father—when he was not feeling brave. He therefore became accustomed to performing at a young age, and performed many roles for both Sam’s and John’s benefit. He was unconsciously building walls with these performances, concealing his true feelings and desires. Later, I think this started to become more intentional, especially in relations with women/sex partners and especially after the Stanford split, as Dean realized how vulnerable to hurt his sensitive nature made him. It was much safer to perform all the time, and never let his real feelings show. For Dean, even more than Sam, I think he often lost sight of what those real feelings were behind the walls as he tried his best to be the performance he was putting on.

For a visual metaphor, I think of it this way: Sam is a boy at the center of a self-constructed labyrinth. He is almost always able to maintain control over how close people get (except when a few slip past his defenses, at which point he may be susceptible to manipulation). Despite all those elaborate passageways, though, there’s still Sam at the center. It’s lonely there, but he knows himself pretty well at least. Dean is a man in a mask who wants the mask to be his real face. He does everything he can to fuse himself and the mask together. They probably are fused at this point, so it would hurt to take the mask off. His memory of the face under the mask is hazy. He’s afraid, if he looks under the mask, he’ll hate what he sees. He’s lonely because no matter how close others get—and he lets them in close, can surround himself with people—none of them will ever see his true face. But he’s convinced himself it’s better this way, because if anyone saw his face, they’d hate it.

8. Need and attachment re: each other: Clearly, both brothers need each other. Sam’s need for Dean is different than Dean’s need for Sam, though. The way I see it, Dean’s need is one that requires reassurance. Perhaps it traces back to the concern about Sam instilled into him at a young age. I think it was strongly exacerbated by the Stanford split, when Dean realized his and Sam’s desires didn’t align. In Dean’s mind, Sam left once and can do it again—he’s always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Sam, on the other hand, has always been able to rely on Dean as a rock, a constant in his life—to the point that, in a way, he takes it for granted when he’s younger. Not in a spoilt, ungrateful way, but in that way that we, as children, might take our parents for granted—they’re always going to be there, right? That’s why, on the few occasions where suddenly, Sam isn’t sure of Dean’s devotion, the rug is ripped out from under him and he’s completely adrift and distraught—seasons 4 and 8 come to mind. Sam needs to be the center of Dean’s universe. When he fears that that’s shifted, that Dean hates him or has chosen someone else over him, it turns Sam’s whole world upside down. For Dean, the fear is that Sam will leave, but it’s a constant, background worry. For Sam, the fear is that Dean will hate him, but since he can usually count on Dean to be obsessed with him, it only comes up now and again. Only Dean can truly hurt Sam, while Dean is vulnerable to hurt from others—though, as always, the deepest hurt can only come from Sam.

9. Ambitions and goals: Sam is the one with greater needs and ambitions outside the scope of their relationship. For Dean, if he’s got Sam and he’s got hunting, he’s content. His greatest accomplishments are taking care of Sam and saving people, and that’s all he needs. I see Sam as craving other sources of fulfillment, though—academic/lore study for its own sake (the pursuit of knowledge), and a leadership/mentorship role. I thought it was very fitting that Sam finds these in late seasons, with leading hunters against the BMOL, then leading the apocalypse AU hunters, then mentoring/nurturing Jack. Dean has always had (and needed) a mentor/leadership/nurturing role with Sam, but Sam also thrives when he’s able to step into that role for others.

10. Normality and monstrosity: I’m just going to link to this post rather than repeat myself.

11. Guilt and self-loathing: This is something they both struggle with and at times, are defined by, but it manifests differently. I think their Hell traumas exemplify their different brands of guilt: for Dean, it’s perpetrator’s guilt. He knows he did something terrible and feels he can never atone for his past actions. For Sam, it’s victim’s/survivor’s guilt. He may not have done anything wrong, but there’s a certain amount of self-blame, especially for perceived weakness. This is another theme for Sam; one of the main faults he sees in himself is weakness—too weak to save Dean from Hell for instance—and as a result tries to shoulder things alone (killing Lilith, Hallucifer, etc). Sam has a need to fix things, to prove to others and himself that he is capable. Dean, I think, sees his main fault as neediness, but really, it’s a deeply buried sense of innate worthlessness. He was taught from a young age that his brother’s life—not his own—was of the utmost value. He internalized that his life was only worthwhile if he could save others, and has trouble with the idea that he, himself, has value beyond what he can do for others.

12. Autonomy and sacrifice: The above leads Dean to have a very constrained sense of his own autonomy. In general, he values duty/loyalty to others over autonomy (although when it comes to cosmic beings, he’s all about free will—see this post if you want more thoughts on that, and Sam’s autonomy). Often, his desire to control others comes from a place of frustration when Dean feels they are neglecting duty/being selfish. I think partially duty towards others is really a deeply ingrained value for him, but there may also be some buried jealousy at play, in that Dean wishes he could act with more freedom, put himself first every once in a while, but doesn’t know how to. Sam tends to value autonomy over duty (this doesn’t mean he doesn’t believe in any sort of responsibility—he’s willing to sacrifice for the greater good, after all).  This means he also tends to respect others’ autonomy, though we all know he can get plenty unhinged where his brother’s safety is concerned. The theme of Sam and autonomy has been talked to death so I’ll stop there, but you can click the link above if you want more.

13. Personal identity: One of Dean’s biggest struggles is with how much of his personal identity is received rather than self-determined. He is tasked with taking care of Sam and he is trained to be a hunter; these become the foundations of his identity. He says it himself: taking care of Sam is not just what he does but who he is. Then in season 3, his own subconscious mocks him for his lack of originality, styling himself and all he loves after his father, showing that this is a source of deep insecurity. This discomfort with himself contributes to his fear of being abandoned and left alone with himself. He doesn’t know who he is without Sam—or rather, is convinced he is nothing without Sam, which is why he fights so hard to keep him by his side. It also contributes to his general desire for friends, or better, family: people who won’t abandon him.

Later in the series, I think Dean has come to embrace his genuine self more. He’s nerdy and excitable and playful—and I don’t see this is as regression, but rather a healthy embracing of what makes him happy—not tastes inherited from his father. If it seems juvenile, it’s because it’s the first time in his life he’s allowed himself to express and explore these things. I think his relationship with hunting is also healthier; it’s no longer something he does because it’s the only thing that can give him worth. He does it because he believes it’s right and genuinely wants to help people. He has a more complete sense of self, and while it’s still totally tied up in Sam, he has gained some self-worth.

[I should note that basically everything I’ve written about Dean supports the headcanon that Dean has BPD—a headcanon I accepted after I realized this. For some more great writing on Dean and BPD, see this post by @venhedish.]

Sam has always known what he wanted for himself and rejected what was given to/allowed him. Wanting what he couldn’t have, from a young age, helped him develop an individual sense of self, not defined by others. I think it’s this difference in their sense of individual identity that leads some viewers to think that Dean loves Sam more than Sam loves Dean. He doesn’t, and losing Dean is just as huge a loss and a grief for Sam as losing Sam was for Dean. Dean is central to Sam’s life, and he can’t feel complete without him; however, his identity and every desire has never revolved as entirely around Dean as Dean’s has around him, so Sam has a foundational sense of self that even losing Dean can’t completely destroy. It’s what allows him to rebuild in grief and carry on (whereas I have no doubt Jensen’s right and Dean would waste away in the back of a pool hall without Sam). Dean’s central role in Sam’s life never disappears, though, and it is, in fact, what allows Sam to carry on; an effort to honor his brother’s memory, living in a way that would make him proud. There’s continuity in that for Sam; the craving for his brother’s approval and happiness never disappears. Seeking those things is what makes Sam happy, both in their domestic years together before Dean’s death and in the years after. They are both, after all, co-dependent!

14: Concluding observation: Sam and Dean have many similar issues, desires, and insecurities: the desire for a normal life, the fear of their own monstrosity, the desire for love and friendship, their need and love for each other, their desire for approval/to be admired, resentment at their childhood, the feeling of being impure and unworthy, the desire for freedom, issues with bodily autonomy. Sometimes these are seen as the purview of one brother or the other exclusively, but that’s almost never true when you consider canon as a whole. The difference is in how these things are internalized, sublimated, reflected, and expressed for each of them. It makes sense they would struggle with so many of the same things, because their lives are deeply intertwined and they are in the same boat most of the time.

[honeykept]

hey this is gonna sound weird but I got back into spn VERY RECENTLY and I want to draw something for Nov 5th (used to do spn fanart way back in the day) but I haven't seen a bunch of the eps from the last few seasons (post S11). I don't have time to rewatch them all before the 5th, do you have a list of eps I should prioritize? Also I'm open to concepts/ideas for the art, I'm good at realism mostly. thank u sooooo much for ur help but also I blame u and the hellers in general for pulling me back in so the art is gonna be dedicated to u guys

hey, that's awesome!! i'm very glad you're back!! here's some episodes you might want to cram in before nov. 5th, from s12 onward! bolded are, in my opinion, essential in terms of understanding either the plot or the fandom (’C’ for ‘cule as in desticule) but of course i’ll advise that you read the plot summaries for any eps you can’t watch, including those that aren’t listed!!

s12e1 — keep calm and carry on : first ep of the season, i assume this would be easiest to start with so you can recall s11, and also just so you can get the gist of where the season will be headed. [PLOT]

s12e8 — LOTUS : introduces you to kelly kline. it's not my favorite and it's a bucklemming ep but plot-wise it might be important to know who kelly is, though tbh you can just read the synopsis and you should be fine. [PLOT]

s12e10 — lily sunder has some regrets : just a genuinely great episode! lots of cas background info and dean/cas moments [C]

s12e12 — stuck in the middle with you : davy perez ep!! cas says i love you!! sorta plot-heavy i GUESS? but if you want destiel angst then this is for you. it's mostly about the angst. [C]

s12e19 — the future : really important in terms of jack [PLOT]

s12e23 — all along the watchtower : season finale in which Very Significant things happen. s13 picks up right from where this leaves off. beginning of the widower arc. [PLOT, C]

s13e1 — lost and found : again, first ep of s13, lots of destiel angst (beautiful beautiful angst. the jacting joices....superb) [PLOT, C]

s13e4 — the big empty : cas!!! answers the question of what happened to him. [PLOT]

gonna go ahead and mention here that in order to watch s13e6 you should probably watch, like. the last ten minutes of s13e5, because again, ep 6 picks up right where ep 5 leaves off.

s13e6 — tombstone : destiel must-watch and end of the widower arc. also significant in terms of jack's development [PLOT, C]

s13e10 — wayward sisters : read the synopsis of ep 9 beforehand though if you want to get a background on kaia. [PLOT, C]

s13e16 — scoobynatural : 'nuff said. [C]

s13e19 — funeralia : not necessary but there’s a good amt. of rowena and cas in this ep so <3 [C]

s13e23 — let the good times roll : season finale, lots of stuff happens plot-wise [PLOT]

s14e1— stranger in a strange land : “i thought you two were joined at the—you know. everything.” really a slow ep tbh, but read the synopsis [C]

s14e3 — the scar : dean is back! there is a scene bt dean/cas in which the score makes me lose my goddamn mind. [PLOT, C]

s14e4 — mint condition : not essential, but a favorite. you’ll especially want to watch it if you’re a dean girl (gn) [C]

s14e7 — unhuman nature : again not necessary, but good jack development/jack scenes with his family [C]

s14e8 — byzantium : VERY important plot wise, re: cas and jack. [PLOT, C]

s14e10 — nihilism : so good. so very very good. also, pamela barnes. [PLOT, C]

do not watch s14e13 lebanon. i repeat, disregard lebanon.

s14e14 — ouroboros : again, one of my faves. gay motw, and v cute scene between dean and cas (: also, rowena!!! [C]

s14e17 — game night : the plot in this ep bleeds through onto the divorce arc of season 15. the ending is...ambiguous, but you can either watch 14x18 or find out what happens in the summary of that ep [PLOT]

s14e20 — moriah : again, a season finale. eps 18-20 really hinge on the events of 14x17, so all you really need to know is that they’re all v upset about [redacted redacted], which happens in ep 17. [PLOT]

s15e3 — the rupture : what i consider to be part one of three re: the divorce arc. also we’ve got a good smattering of characters and it’s important for plot reasons [PLOT, C]

s15e6 — golden time : part 2 of 3 in divorce arc. definite angst, lots of cas, and lots of eileen ((: [PLOT, C]

s15e9 — the trap : now, ofc this is part 3 of 3 in the divorce arc, and while it may be a great dean/cas ep, i must say it’s also one of my favorite sam episodes. sorry, but you really can’t skip this one!! [PLOT, C]

s15e10 — the heroes' journey : one of my favorite episodes, but it's garth-centric and you can really read all you need to know via episode summary but still. the implications of this ep haunt me. why lamp. [C]

s15e17 — unity : lots of god-stuff happening, and it leads into 15x18 [PLOT, C]

s15e18 — despair : the last episode of spn!! [PLOT, C]

so, added up, that’s 4 essential eps in season 12, 4 essential eps in season 13, 4 essential eps in season 14, and 5 essential eps in season 15. grand total of 17 eps across all four seasons! (which is less than one full season of the show)

quick run down in case you need a TL;DR: 

season 12: episodes 1, 10, 19 and 23

season 13: episodes 1, 6, 10, and 23

season 14: episodes 3, 8, 10, and 17

season 15: episodes 3, 6, 9, 17, and 18

now, if you need to narrow it down even further, i’d prioritize the eps that are labeled “[PLOT, C]” (12 eps) as those are important plot-wise and also for references w/i the fandom. good luck, i hope this helped!!