#saltyrant

[saltysaltdog]

Turns out there's a third more embarrassing option than passing or failing a driver test, which is: due to an error in the booking system you never had a test to begin with and have to make numerous phone calls explaining the issue and putting minimum wage workers into uncomfortable conversations that neither of you want to be in!!!!

I'm very normal about this!!! And about the more phone calls I'll have to make!! I'm feeling average and neutral about the situation!!! Like a normal person!!! Median!!!

[saltydoesstuff]

Y'all ever just not feel real?

Like you're there, but not there. You feel things, but you aren't. It all feels the same, which is nothing- or it's too fuzzy to tell any difference? You see yourself, but it's not you. You don't recognize yourself in the mirror, you don't know who that is, but it isn't you. You don't know what you look like, but it isn't what is in the mirror.

I want to do things, but I can't. And I don't know why.

I don't like these days.

[jessicas-pi]

The Shuttle AU where Nigel Anstruthers is even more devious and DOESN'T separate Rosalie from her family, and he pretends to be nice and good and even invites Bettina to spend her school holidays at Stornham Court one year.

(That last one was not his best idea, tbh.)

Through chance, circumstance, or maybe the weaving hand of Fate, Bettina Vanderpoel and James Hubert John Fergus Saltyre meet, speak, and quickly discover their mutual distaste for Sir Nigel Anstruthers...

Anyway I call this one Jem and Bett Ruin Nigel's Life (Ten Years Ahead of Schedule)

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Dunstan read the chronicle of Red Godwyn once at the age of fifteen and it permanently altered his brain chemistry

[jakexneytiri]

tagged by @beautyofattolia

tagging: @neytirisgroove @beautyliesbehindthehills @thevanityofthefox @patrycore @jakesullyspillowtits @jakesullyfatjuicypeen @oceanstide @sulieykte @teyamsatan @upside-down-peonies @bway-car @saltyre

[kanerallels]

The second best part about having read The Shuttle is that you'll be watching a British drama and the broody love interest (who you don't care for) will lose his temper at the main character and you can go "smh my head Lord John Jerry Saltyre Smith Dunstan would NEVER"

The best part about having read The Shuttle is that you'll see a typewriter and immediately go "G. SELDEN???" like you're the Beyonce meme

[becoming-not-became]

Heart

I found my heart in the root cellar hiding behind cans of pickled beets and tomatoes way back tucked away in a dank corner crying no actually thathad stopped now drybut I knew ithaving seen faint saltyrings all around itlike little chalk outlines where bodies lay dying one in the same I thought then staring one in the same

[mediumsizetex]

MLP Pillars Human by saltyre

[la-fabbrica]

Se ho lavorato alla Fabbrica dal 79 al 96, questa cosa deve essere avvenuta circa trent'anni fa. Non i primi tempi ma negli ultimi anni. Quando ero in Magazzino al ricevimento merci. Ma chi ne è più sicuro? Poi spiegherò il perché. Procediamo: oltre a produrre alcolici, la Fabbrica ne importava e distribuiva in Italia. Dall'estero arrivava il whisky, marchi non molto conosciuti o rinomati come il W5 e il Saltyre che la caposquadra Isolina, pronunciava Saltrè ma d'altronde lei era Romagnola puro sangue. Durante un fine settimana arrivó un carico dall'Irlanda. Forse o forse no ma sempre da quelle terre Albioniche. Però chi guidava il Tir, era Irlandese, di questo sono certo. E io fino ad allora non avevo mai visto un Irlandese, anche se sapevo che esistevano. Quella volta vidi una (una) Irlandese. Irlandese camionistA, non un camionistO come si dice oggi. Ricordo solo che era una bella donna sotto il borsalino, inteso il berretto, camicia a quadri, con un fisico asciutto, a differenza dei camionisti che venivano a consegnare alla Fabbrica. Bella davvero e come parlava bene la sua lingua, inglese o irlandese che fosse. Solo che non sapendo io nulla o quasi di inglese, era impossibile comunicare se non a gesti e parolacce, intese come storpiature di parole italiche declinate in un improbabile inglese. In ogni caso, anche a saperci comunicare, ci sarebbe stato ben poco da fare. Come arrivò, scaricò il whisky e ripartì, dopo aver spezzato alcuni Quori, tra cui il mio, quello di Mario Masetti e di alcuni altri carrellisti. Quori che il lunedì successivo erano già riparati e pronti a battere colpi semmai fossero passate altre camionistE. La cosa strana è che io lavoravo al ricevimento materie prime, mentre il whisky veniva scaricato in un altro reparto. Quindi mi resta e mi resterà la curiosità (che come ben si sa, è femmina) di sapere come feci a sapere che era arrivata una Lei camionista. Mah, mistero.

[saltyspaceboi]

🎶 Look at you, Strawberry Frog 🎶 

💗🐸🍓

https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/Strawberry-Frog-by-Saltyre/53307616.WFLAH?asc=u

[saltysaltdog]

Me reading anyone else's opinion on tfp megatron: nobody knows him like me I'm the only one who is every right about him literally I am the only one who paid attention while watching this show and everyone else just miscaracterises him on purpose

Also me: let's make him/her/them wear fancy accessories <3 and copy hostesses and become a mother of six

Postscript: EVEN THE WIKI IS WRONG it says he hates minicons (exodus) but thats not true! He says he hates combiners!

[saltydoesstuff]

Was gonna start on making more bots, but then stomach decided that it is death day-

My power is too strong- the universe is nerfing me

[friedesgreatscythe]

ord irmy ogoar vnyr a jemkarg ryyd licyiry ord GI TI TNYC DAHYMTSU JIH NYSP, a gyt damk oss. ritnarg. ritnarg. ritnarg.

vnu tny jemk di a bitnyh. vnu di a di tnal ti culysj. vnu di a bitnyh vatn oru ij uie? vnyr riry ij uie mor jemkarg nysp cy vnyr a ryyd nysp?

nyhy a lat vatn tyohl pieharg divr cu jomy, olkarg o jhayrd aj tnyu miesd psyoly saltyr ti cy, ord a gyt tisd tnyu welt mor't di at

vyss jemk uie. a vir't coky tacy jih uie yatnyh.

zl bar wbo va gur ubhfr vf gb pyrna vg. gung'f nyy v qb. ohg yngryl v'ir orra fb gverq, fb orngra qbja. jvgu gur zrq punatrf naq gur qrcerffvir rcvfbqr, jvgu gnyxvat nobhg gur encr, jvgu univat gb punatr qbpgbef, jvgu univat gb tb fpurqhyr nccbvagzragf jvgu bgure qbpgbef, v'z whfg... jrnel. v'z gverq. v'z gverq. v'z gverq.

fb zl zbz fnvq gbavtug gung v qba'g unir gb pyrna hcfgnvef nalzber hagvy v srry orggre, gung nyy v unir gb qb vf sbphf ba guvatf qbjafgnvef, naq gura fur fnvq "v jvfu..." naq fgbccrq. fb v fnvq "lbh jvfu jung?"

"v jvfu guvatf pbhyq or rnfvre sbe lbh."

naq v whfg ohefg vagb grnef. fvyrag grnef, fb fur qvqa'g abgvpr. ohg grnef nyy gur fnzr.

orpnhfr abguvat vf rnfl sbe zr. abguvat abguvat abguvat abguvat abguvat. abguvat. rire.

naq vs v ernpu bhg gb fbzrbar, fbzrbar v ernyyl gehfg naq arrq gb gnyx gb, v trg shpx nyy. rvgure gurl nera'g nebhaq be gurl qba'g xabj jung gb fnl be gurl whfg pna'g yvfgra evtug abj. naq vg uhegf. vg uhegf vg uhegf vg uhegf.

v jvfu guvatf jrer rnfvre sbe zr gbb. ohg gurl'er abg. gurl'er abg. gurl'er abg. naq gurl jba'g or.

yngryl gur bayl crbcyr jub arrq zr ner fgenatref va zhygvcynlre tnzrf jub nfx sbe zl uryc orngvat obffrf. gubfr ner gur bayl crbcyr. v'z jbeguyrff naq hfryrff naq haarprffnel naq hajnagrq bgurejvfr.

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Five Life-Changing Words

The Shuttle soulmark au ficlet

Also on Ao3!

 Sometimes when the Shuttle plans to weave two cords together, it bears on them an omen, a message, a sign. Some people whose weaving the Shuttle knows must come to be are born with a sign on their wrists, the first words that the other will say to them. These people, whose souls the Shuttle could never separate, man has dubbed: "soulmates."

 In all the chaos and confusion, Saltyre hadn't seen the figure approaching until she was right next to him, until she spoke those five life-changing words.

 "What has happened to us?"

 No.

 It couldn't be.

 Of all the times, of all the places, of all the people, why did it have to be now? Here? Her? Maybe it was just a matter of coincidence- maybe someone else would say it to him later- but who?

 There had never been any "us" in his life besides his friendship with Penzance, nor did he ever expect there to be, and nor had it ever made sense until now, for someone to ask "What has happened to us," of a stranger.

 These were the words he'd been waiting to hear all of his life, weren't they? All those nights spent alone, spent in wonder, wondering who this girl might be and what adventure would make her introduction so bold. He'd imagined dozens of hundreds of girls saying it in millions of ways- but none had ever said it more beautifully than when she did.

 He heard her fear, her trembling, her courage, her spirit. She wasn't shy or confused or in need of defending, she just was, she was, well, something. Something truly special.

 "A tramp steamer has run into us in the fog…"

 She quickly glanced at her wrist, then up at him, almost instinctively, so quickly he wouldn't have noticed it unless he was looking.

 Which he was.

 "Fancy that." He thought "Anything I'd've chosen to say would've been on her wrist Fancy that indeed."

 But he knew there were more important things to worry about than the soulmate who stood there beside him, so he felt he'd be best to wait it out.

 For now.

[lucasbezian]

Blue #Saltyre #sky in #Gourock #Scotland #Clyde #photography #picoftheday #landscape #nature #sunshine #sunporn #bluesky #sea #geoporn (at Gourock)

[kanerallels]

The British gentry: James Hubert John Fergus Saltyre, fifteenth Earl of Mount Dunstan

Some American rancher, an intellectual: Jem Salter