#sasha fluff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

debussy42 · 5 months ago

Text

"straight or curly?"

Guys, I'm not gonna lie. This whole nonsense started with me just debating whether or not I should straighten or curl my hair today. Wow, I miss my man Levi. Maybe it's with Valentine's day coming up, but I needed some emotionally charged, dancing, jealousy, barely restrained Levi in my life. Hope y'all enjoy ◡̈

wc: 8k WHEWWWWWWW

"Sasha. Mikasa. Should I straighten my hair today, or curl it? It's the weekend, and I want to try something new."

Mikasa, already dressed and pulling on her boots, barely glances up before saying, “Straight.”

Sasha, who’s still lounging on her bed with no urgency whatsoever, tilts her head in thought. “Curl it. It looks cuter that way.”

You hum, turning back to the mirror, lightly running your fingers through your hair. “Hmm. Mikasa, why straight?”

She shrugs. “It’s easier.”

Sasha rolls her eyes. “Yeah, but it’s the weekend. Don’t you want to, I don’t know, do something fun with it?”

You smirk at their contrast and tap your fingers against the wooden vanity. “Jean’s going to say straight. Connie’s going to say whatever makes me look stupid.”

Mikasa ties her scarf, uninterested. “Jean will say whatever makes you look ‘mature.’”

Sasha snorts. “He’s been watching too many noblewomen walk through town.”

You shake your head, grinning at their banter, then turn back to the mirror. “Alright, decision made.”

Mikasa raises a brow. “Which one?”

You give a dramatic pause before flashing them a mischievous grin. “I’ll ask Levi.”

Sasha chokes on air. “Wha—are you insane?”

Mikasa actually looks up at that, blinking. “You’re going to ask the Captain?”

You shrug innocently, gathering your comb. “He’s got an eye for detail. Might as well make use of it.”

Sasha buries her face into her pillow, groaning. “Oh my god, you love testing death, don’t you?”

Mikasa, while less dramatic, still watches you carefully. “You’re comfortable with him, sure. But that’s still Levi. You really think he’s going to care about how you do your hair?”

You smirk. “I don’t know. But I do know that if I look ridiculous, he won’t hesitate to tell me.”

Sasha peeks out from her pillow, stifling laughter. “That’s... actually true.”

Mikasa just shakes her head. “I’m not stopping you. But don’t be surprised if he tells you you’re wasting his time.”

You flash them both a grin before heading for the door. “I’ll be back with verdict.”

—

The morning sun is just beginning to filter through the halls as you make your way toward the common area, boots clicking softly against the wooden floors. Most of the squad is still waking up, scattered across various spaces, engaged in quiet conversations or lazy weekend tasks.

And then, you spot Levi.

He’s near the windows, arms crossed, watching the drizzle outside with his usual unreadable expression. The early light casts a soft glow against his features, the sharp angles of his face somehow looking even sharper in the muted tones of the morning.

You take a breath, then casually stride up next to him, standing just close enough that he acknowledges your presence with a glance but doesn’t immediately turn away.

“Captain,” you say, tilting your head.

Levi’s gaze flickers to you, his brows drawing together slightly. “What?”

You twirl a strand of your hair between your fingers, smirking. “Should I straighten or curl my hair today?”

There’s a pause. A heavy, weighted pause.

Levi blinks once. Then twice. His expression is as blank as ever, but there’s a split second where you think—just maybe—you’ve stunned him into silence.

“…You woke up just to ask me that?”

You cross your arms, feigning seriousness. “This is an important decision, Captain. I need guidance. You have high standards, so I figured you’d have an opinion.”

Levi exhales slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever asked me.”

You bite back a grin. “That’s not an answer, though.”

He finally looks at you fully, scanning you with the same critical gaze he uses when inspecting gear, paperwork, or a particularly irritating recruit.

“Straight,” he says flatly. “Less maintenance.”

You huff. “That’s what Mikasa said.”

Levi shrugs. “Then she’s right.”

You tap your chin, pretending to contemplate. “Sasha said curls.”

“Tch. Of course she did.”

You fight the urge to laugh. “You really don’t like being pulled into nonsense, do you?”

Levi scoffs lightly, already turning back to the window. “And yet, somehow, you keep pulling me in.”

You grin. “It’s a talent.”

Levi exhales again, shaking his head. “Straighten it. But if you’re going to keep bothering me about it, just shave it all off and save everyone the trouble.”

You do laugh at that, shaking your head as you step back. “Alright, alright. Decision made. Thanks, Captain.”

Levi doesn’t reply, but as you turn to leave, you swear you catch something—the barest flicker of amusement in his gaze.

And somehow, that feels like more of a victory than anything else.

You straighten your posture before giving a firm nod, shifting away from the relaxed banter you nearly let slip. “Thank you, Captain.” Your voice is lighter now, but the respect is there—solid, unwavering, the way it should be when addressing him.

Levi doesn’t reply, but the flicker of acknowledgment in his expression tells you that he noticed the shift. He doesn’t need praise, doesn’t care for pleasantries, but he does expect discipline.

And you do respect him—his authority, his position, the sheer presence he carries that makes the rest of the squad tread carefully around him. That weight isn’t something you take lightly.

With your decision made, you turn on your heel and make your way back toward the barracks, catching the eyes of a few cadets as you pass. Some of them look at you like you’ve just done something insane, while others avoid making eye contact entirely, as if speaking to Levi so casually might have put you on a death sentence.

When you step back into the barracks, Sasha and Mikasa are still exactly where you left them, Sasha now halfway through a snack she definitely didn’t have before.

Mikasa eyes you first. “Straight?”

You smirk. “Straight.”

Sasha lets out a dramatic sigh. “Of course he’d say that.”

You shrug as you make your way to the small mirror on the vanity, pulling out your comb. “Well, you did say he has high standards. Might as well follow through.”

Mikasa finishes tying the last knot on her gear before grabbing her scarf. “I don’t understand why you’d ask him in the first place.”

You glance at her through the mirror, lips twitching. “Because he’d tell me the truth, not just what I want to hear.”

Sasha hums thoughtfully. “That is true… Still, brave of you to just walk up to him like that.”

You roll your eyes, running the comb through your hair. “He’s my Captain, not some untouchable ghost. You all act like he’s going to snap my neck for asking a question.”

Sasha gives you an incredulous look. “He would if you tested him enough.”

Mikasa, though less dramatic, simply says, “You’re more comfortable with him than the rest of us are.”

You pause at that, the weight of her words settling over you.

It’s true.

The others hold Levi at a distance—not just because of his rank, but because of who he is. Humanity’s Strongest. A leader, an authority, a presence that demands respect with the sheer force of his being. You’ve seen how they sit up straighter, how they quiet down when he enters a room, how the air around him shifts the atmosphere entirely.

And yet, with you, the distance is different. You still respect him, still heed his orders, but you don’t shrink away under his stare. You step forward, meet his gaze, hold your ground—not recklessly, not without care, but with something else. Something more solid.

You shake off the thought, focusing back on your reflection as you finish smoothing down the last strand of hair.

“Well,” you say, keeping your tone light, “it’s not my fault you all look like you’ve seen a ghost whenever he’s in the room.”

Mikasa doesn’t argue, simply picking up her gear and heading toward the door. “I’ll see you outside.”

Sasha gives you one last lingering look, then grins. “If you ever do cross a line, just give me your rations before you get executed.”

You snort. “Noted.”

As Sasha follows after Mikasa, you take one last glance at yourself before heading toward the door as well, rolling your shoulders back as you mentally prepare for the day ahead.

Even if you are more comfortable with the Captain, that doesn’t mean you’ll ever forget who he is.

Levi Ackerman.

Your Captain. Your superior.

The strongest soldier alive.

And somehow, someone you can’t seem to stop seeking out.

—

The morning air is crisp as you step outside, the lingering chill of the earlier rain still clinging to the air. The ground is damp beneath your boots, the scent of wet earth and wood mixing with the sharp freshness of the wind rolling over the fields beyond the walls. The sun is beginning to break through the thinning clouds, casting golden streaks across the headquarters, its light catching on the dew that clings to the edges of the grass.

You inhale deeply, letting the coolness of it wake you up fully. The barracks are already alive with movement—cadets milling about, some heading toward training fields, others finishing up morning duties. The sound of voices, of boots against gravel, of birds stirring in the trees beyond, all mix together into the low, steady hum of a world still in motion.

Sasha and Mikasa are waiting for you a few feet away, Mikasa adjusting the straps of her gear with practiced efficiency, Sasha idly bouncing on the balls of her feet like she’s trying to generate enough energy to get through the day. She notices you first, squinting at you with exaggerated focus before nodding in approval.

“Alright, I’ll admit it. The Captain was right. The straight hair suits you.”

You snort, walking up to them. “You sound so betrayed.”

“I am betrayed,” she huffs dramatically. “But only because I wanted to be right.”

Mikasa shakes her head. “It was a practical answer. Levi only ever gives practical answers.”

You hum, knowing that’s true, but there’s something about the way he’d looked at you when he said it—how he’d assessed you with that sharp gaze of his, how he’d told you without hesitation, straighten it—that lingers in your thoughts more than it should.

But before you can dwell on it too much, the sound of boots approaching pulls your attention.

Erwin and Levi are walking through the yard, their presence commanding without effort. There’s something about the way the air shifts when they’re together—Erwin with his calm, calculated confidence, and Levi, sharp-edged and observant, moving with quiet precision.

Cadets straighten as they pass, conversations dulling slightly out of instinct, as if the weight of leadership alone is enough to pull people to attention. Even Jean, who normally has some sort of wisecrack ready, keeps his mouth firmly shut as they approach.

You, on the other hand, watch them with interest. Erwin is speaking in low tones, his expression unreadable, while Levi listens, his eyes narrowed slightly, his arms crossed as he walks in measured steps beside him.

But then, as if drawn by some unspoken pull, Levi’s gaze flickers—to you.

It’s brief, but it lingers just long enough to be intentional. A silent acknowledgment. A glance that feels heavier than just casual observation.

Your heart stirs in a way you don’t fully understand.

You don’t break eye contact right away. You hold it, just for a second longer than necessary, before nodding in quiet greeting, maintaining the formality expected of you.

Levi doesn’t nod back, but there’s a shift in his expression, something so subtle that only someone looking for it would notice. And then he looks away, back to Erwin, as if nothing had happened at all.

The moment passes, but it leaves something behind.

Mikasa notices. She doesn’t say anything, but she notices. The slight tilt of her head, the way her gaze flickers between you and Levi before she simply adjusts her gear again, tells you that much.

Sasha, however, being Sasha, definitely notices.

She leans in slightly, voice hushed but teasing. “That was a look.”

You keep your expression carefully neutral. “That was nothing.”

Sasha smirks. “Sure it was.”

You roll your eyes, but the warmth spreading beneath your ribs is undeniable.

—

The morning drifts into training, the sky fully clearing as the sun rises higher, warming the damp earth below. The air is filled with the rhythmic whoosh of ODM gear, the sharp snap of cables latching onto wooden poles, the occasional grunt of effort as cadets push themselves through the drills.

You move through the routine with practiced ease, the familiar weight of your gear settling into your movements, your muscles burning in that satisfying way that comes with hard work. The wind rushes past your ears as you propel yourself forward, the world blurring for a moment before you land solidly on the next platform, inhaling sharply before launching off again.

Training days like this—ones where you can feel your strength, your skill, the sheer power of your body moving through the air—are the ones that remind you why you fight. Why you push.

You fall into rhythm with the others, weaving between them, keeping pace as you scan for your next maneuver. Jean and Eren are bickering between swings, Sasha is somehow eating mid-air, and Mikasa—unsurprisingly—is moving effortlessly, her form almost unnatural in its efficiency.

And then there’s Levi.

His presence alone changes the air.

He’s not just watching—he’s analyzing, assessing the squad with sharp, unwavering focus. His movements are controlled, effortless, the way he balances his weight even as he stands observing more a testament to his skill than anything else.

Every once in a while, he calls out adjustments. A sharp, no-nonsense command. A correction before anyone even has a chance to mess up.

And when his voice cuts through the field—low, firm, carrying more authority in a single word than most could in an entire speech—people listen.

You land solidly on a nearby platform, catching your breath for just a second before you hear it.

“Your form’s getting sloppy.”

You turn sharply.

Levi is watching you, arms crossed, gaze heavy.

You blink, surprised at first, before narrowing your eyes slightly. “It’s not sloppy.”

Levi raises a brow. “You hesitated before your last swing.”

You huff, rolling your shoulders back, feeling the weight of your gear settle evenly again. “Only because Jean was in my way.”

Jean, from several feet away, throws up his hands. “Why is my name always being thrown around?”

Levi doesn’t even acknowledge him. His attention stays on you.

“You’re letting yourself get distracted,” he says evenly, gaze unwavering. “Fix it.”

Your jaw tightens slightly.

You could argue, you want to argue, but you know better. Levi doesn’t say things for the sake of it. If he’s calling you out, it’s because he knows you can do better.

And that bothers you more than anything.

You nod once, sharp. “Understood, Captain.”

Levi watches you for a second longer before giving the smallest nod of approval. And then, just like that, his attention shifts—back to the squad, back to the broader picture, back to everything else that needs his attention.

You take a slow breath before launching yourself forward again, this time sharper, faster.

And though he doesn’t look at you again, you know he’s still watching.

And that’s enough to push you harder.

—

It was the end of the short lesson as you were released for the weekend.

“Guys,” You fall back into step with the girls, absentmindedly stroking a piece of your hair, “what if he only chose straight hair because it’s more convenient, not because it necessarily looked better on me? How can I know?”

Sasha groans dramatically, throwing her arms in the air. “Oh my god, you’re still thinking about this?”

Mikasa, walking beside you with her gear slung over her shoulder, gives you a sidelong glance. “Levi doesn’t say things just to say them. If he said straight, he meant it.”

You let out a thoughtful hum, twirling a strand of your hair between your fingers. “But what if he only said it because it’s easier, not because it actually looked better?”

Sasha snorts. “Then I guess you’ll just have to change it up and see if he reacts.”

You blink at her. “What, like curl my hair next time and test his response?”

Mikasa shakes her head as if she can already see where this is going. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Sasha grins mischievously. “I do.”

You narrow your eyes in thought, considering.

Mikasa sighs. “He’s our Captain, not some noble at a ballroom.”

“Exactly,” you quip, smirking. “Which means if he does notice, it’ll mean something.”

Mikasa doesn’t respond, just presses her lips into a thin line as if choosing to disengage entirely.

Sasha, however, nudges you with her elbow. “Alright, next mission: Operation Look Pretty and See if Captain Notices.”

You huff a laugh. “That is not what we’re calling it.”

Sasha grins. “Too late. It’s already official.”

Mikasa sighs again, rubbing her temple. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation.”

You smirk but don’t push further, letting the subject drop—for now. But deep down, curiosity lingers.

Because, honestly?

You kind of do want to see if he notices.

—

“I mean, we are going out tonight to celebrate Jean’s birthday. I can accidentally slip by him with my curled hair to see his reaction…” You muse thoughtfully as you get change out of uniform and into more casual clothing, appreciating the cool breeze that hits your legs as you twirl in a skirt.

Mikasa groans, rubbing her temple like she’s already regretting being part of this conversation. “That’s ridiculous.”

Sasha, on the other hand, lights up. “No, that’s genius.”

You grin, brushing through your hair as you sit on the edge of your bed. “Is it though?”

“Yes,” Sasha says immediately. “Because listen, if Levi doesn’t care, he won’t react. But if he notices—even a little—that means he actually has an opinion on how you look.” She gestures dramatically. “And that would mean something.”

Mikasa exhales through her nose. “Or it just means he’s observant and has an opinion on everything.”

You hum thoughtfully, tying your hair into a loose ponytail for now. “That’s why it’s a test, Mikasa. For science.”

Mikasa stares at you blankly. “That is not how science works.”

Sasha claps her hands together. “Alright, so plan’s simple—tonight, you curl your hair, we go out for Jean’s birthday, and at some point, you just... happen to slip by the Captain.”

You nod, amused at how invested Sasha has become. “Exactly. Totally casual. No effort at all.”

Mikasa shakes her head, standing up and adjusting the straps on her uniform. “I’m not encouraging this. If you want to waste your time overanalyzing Levi’s non-reaction, that’s on you.”

Sasha rolls her eyes. “It’s called gathering data, Mikasa.”

You laugh, standing as well. “Exactly. And besides, it’s just for fun.”

Mikasa gives you a look that says you are all insufferable, but she doesn’t argue further. Instead, she merely slings her gear over her shoulder. “I’ll meet you both outside.”

As she leaves, Sasha leans in conspiratorially. “She’s totally curious too, she just won’t admit it.”

You smirk. “Oh, definitely.”

Sasha grins. “Alright, then. Let’s make Jean’s birthday party very interesting.”

The rest of the day passes in a blur of training, chores, and preparation for the evening. By the time the sun dips low over the horizon, painting the sky in hues of soft orange and violet, the atmosphere around headquarters shifts into something lighter, more relaxed. It’s rare to have a night like this—where everyone can unwind, even just for a few hours, without the weight of duty pressing down on them.

You stand in front of the small mirror in the barracks, fingers deftly working through your hair as you curl it, piece by piece. The heat from the iron brushes against your fingertips, and you carefully shape each strand, letting the soft waves fall naturally over your shoulders.

Mikasa, seated on her bunk, pretends not to watch but definitely watches. She says nothing, but the occasional glance in the mirror’s reflection gives her away.

Sasha, on the other hand, is fully invested, sitting cross-legged on her bed and leaning forward. “Oh, yeah. This was definitely the right call.”

You smirk. “Told you.”

She grins. “You’re about to ruin a man’s whole perception of himself.”

You snort, shaking your head as you adjust the last curl. “You’re making it sound like a battle strategy.”

Sasha shrugs. “If you win, I say it counts.”

Mikasa finally sighs. “It’s ridiculous to think Levi would even care about something like this.”

You raise an eyebrow at her through the mirror. “Then there’s no harm in testing it, right?”

She presses her lips into a thin line, but doesn’t argue.

Satisfied, you stand up, smoothing your hands over your outfit—something casual but presentable, enough to blend in while still feeling put-together. The anticipation hums beneath your skin, but you shake it off, reminding yourself that this is not some grand event.

It’s just Jean’s birthday.

And Levi noticing or not noticing your hair is just... extra data.

—

The town is alive with warmth and movement, the faint glow of lanterns casting golden light against cobblestone streets. It’s a stark contrast to headquarters—where the air is always tense, where everything is lined with purpose and duty. Here, laughter spills from tavern doors, the clinking of glasses and distant music drifting through the air.

The squad gathers outside one of the better-kept taverns, waiting for stragglers before heading in. Jean stands at the center of it all, basking in the attention of his birthday, grinning as Connie pretends to give a heartfelt speech about his immense wisdom and contributions to humanity.

You laugh, rolling your eyes as you adjust your jacket. “You’re laying it on thick, Connie.”

Connie throws up his hands. “It’s his birthday, let me lie to the guy.”

Jean scoffs, shoving him lightly. “At least someone is recognizing my greatness.”

Mikasa stands beside you, arms crossed, looking unimpressed. Sasha is already trying to drag Reiner and Bertholdt into a bet over who can drink the most before passing out. The atmosphere is light, easy—exactly the kind of night you all need.

And then, just as you’re about to head inside, you feel it.

A shift.

The kind of awareness that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

You glance over your shoulder, and sure enough—Levi is approaching from the other end of the street. He’s walking with Erwin and Hange, both of whom are engaged in quiet conversation. But Levi—Levi is quiet as always, sharp eyes scanning the gathered squad as he moves.

Your heart does a stupid little lurch in your chest.

It’s not a big deal. You know that. But suddenly, every single curl feels too obvious, every strand of hair placed too deliberately.

Sasha subtly elbows you, voice low. “Showtime.”

You swallow, ignoring the ridiculousness of it all as you casually—very casually—turn your head and pretend to adjust your sleeve, making it look like you just so happen to be standing directly in Levi’s line of sight.

He slows slightly as he approaches, his eyes flickering over the group in his usual assessing way. You watch carefully, scanning for any sign of reaction—anything at all—but his face remains unreadable.

And then—his gaze lands on you.

It’s brief. Just a flicker. But something shifts.

His sharp eyes drag over your hair—not just in passing, but with intent. The tiniest hesitation, the kind that would be imperceptible to anyone not looking for it.

You hold your breath.

And then, just as quickly as it happened, it’s gone.

His expression smooths back into neutrality, his attention snapping forward again as he brushes past you with no comment, following Erwin and Hange into the tavern.

You exhale slowly, feeling the weight of Sasha’s expectant stare burning into the side of your face.

“Well?” she whispers, practically vibrating. “Did he notice?”

You press your lips together, considering.

“…He paused.”

Sasha grabs your arm. “OH, MY GOD.”

Mikasa groans, already walking ahead. “I refuse to be part of this.”

Jean, oblivious to everything, is already inside, basking in the attention of his own celebration.

You, however, linger for just a second longer, glancing at the door Levi disappeared into.

Maybe it was nothing.

Maybe it was everything.

But either way—he paused.

And that was more than enough.

—

The warmth of the tavern hits you the moment you step inside, a stark contrast to the cool night air outside. The scent of old wood, spiced ale, and freshly baked bread lingers in the air, mixing with the low hum of chatter and the occasional burst of laughter from a drunken patron. The flickering candlelight casts everything in a dim, golden glow, the kind that makes the edges of reality feel softer, less urgent.

Jean, reveling in the rare occasion of being the center of attention, immediately heads toward an empty table near the back, where the rest of your squad is already gathering. Connie slings an arm around his shoulders, teasing him about how old he’s getting, while Sasha is already scanning the menu, clearly prioritizing food over conversation.

You settle into a seat across from Mikasa, who looks less interested in the celebration and more like she’s simply here to make sure Eren doesn’t do anything stupid. You smirk, leaning on your elbow. “I bet you five rations Eren ends up in a bar fight before the night is over.”

Mikasa doesn’t even blink. “I’m not betting against something that’s guaranteed to happen.”

You laugh, but before you can respond, the door swings open again, and your attention flickers instinctively to the entrance.

Levi steps inside, following Erwin and Hange as they make their way toward a separate table reserved for officers. Unlike the rest of you—who have already started loosening up, the casual energy of the tavern slipping into your movements—Levi remains the same. Composed. Straight-backed. Completely unfazed by the shift in atmosphere.

But you don’t miss the way his sharp gaze subtly sweeps over the room, assessing the layout, cataloging who’s here, where the exits are. It’s instinctual, second nature. Even in a space meant for relaxation, he’s still a soldier first.

He moves toward his seat, and for a second, just a brief second, his gaze flickers in your direction.

You feel the weight of it, even from across the room.

It’s unreadable, just like before. But you know he saw.

Your heart does that stupid little skip again, and you force yourself to look away, suppressing the smug smile threatening to form on your lips.

Sasha, however, does not suppress hers. She leans in close, voice hushed but practically vibrating with excitement. “He paused again.”

You shake your head. “It could have been anything.”

“It wasn’t anything.”

Mikasa sighs, already regretting sitting next to you two. “If you two spent half this energy on training, you’d both be Captain-level by now.”

Sasha grins. “Okay, but watching this unfold is so much more entertaining.”

You roll your eyes, picking up a glass of water and taking a slow sip, hoping to calm down the unnecessary giddiness that’s settled in your chest. It’s stupid—you know it’s stupid—but something about Levi’s pause feels like a tiny, unspoken victory.

Still, you shake it off. The night isn’t about that. It’s about Jean, about unwinding, about letting yourself be a person instead of just a soldier for once.

And so, you let the conversation around you pull you in. You tease Jean about his dramatic speeches, you steal a bite of Sasha’s food when she isn’t looking, you let yourself sink into the warmth of camaraderie, the normalcy of it all.

Time moves easily, drinks are passed around, and the sound of laughter grows louder as the night wears on.

Until—

“You’re drinking too fast.”

The voice is low, firm, unmistakable.

Your muscles stiffen slightly before you even see him, but when you glance up, sure enough, Levi is standing beside you, arms crossed, looking unimpressed.

Your glass, half-full with whatever cheap ale Sasha had convinced you to try, is still in your hand. You raise an eyebrow, tilting it slightly. “I’ve had one drink, Captain.”

Levi doesn’t budge. “And I’ve seen what happens when you lot get carried away.”

Around you, the others fall quiet, the easygoing atmosphere from moments ago shifting under Levi’s presence. Even Jean—who, on his own birthday, should technically be allowed to act out a little—sits up straighter, eyes flickering toward you with mild concern.

You swallow, knowing that Levi is right, that the last thing you need is to be unfocused, careless.

Still, you offer a small, placating smile. “I hear you, Captain. Don’t worry—I know my limits.”

Levi watches you for a moment longer, gaze lingering just a fraction longer than necessary. But then he exhales sharply through his nose, something between a sigh and a quiet acknowledgment, before stepping back. “Tch. Just don’t do anything stupid.”

You nod, and with that, Levi finally retreats, making his way back toward his own table.

The second he’s out of earshot, Sasha lets out a long breath. “Wow. He really keeps an eye on you, huh?”

Jean shakes his head. “I don’t know whether to feel sorry for you or be impressed you can get away with talking back.”

You roll your eyes. “I wasn’t talking back. I was just… clarifying.”

Mikasa hums. “He didn’t call anyone else out. Just you.”

That gives you pause.

You glance back toward Levi’s table, where he’s now sitting with Erwin and Hange, sipping from a teacup instead of anything stronger. His posture remains the same—composed, indifferent—but his awareness of the room is ever-present.

And maybe, just maybe, his awareness of you is a little sharper than the rest.

You turn back to your friends, shaking your head. “You’re all reading too much into it.”

Sasha smirks. “Are we?”

You don’t answer.

You just take another sip of water, ignoring the way your heart betrays you with a quiet, persistent rhythm.

—

The world feels a little softer around the edges, the golden glow of lanterns casting everything in a dreamlike haze. The warmth of the alcohol hums beneath your skin, not overwhelming, but just enough—enough to dull the weight of the past week, enough to make the music sound richer, enough to let yourself exist in the moment without overthinking it.

The tavern is alive now, laughter spilling over the strum of instruments, boots tapping against the wooden floor in time with the lively rhythm. Around you, your friends are caught up in the revelry—Connie and Sasha are engaged in some ridiculous footwork competition, Jean is attempting to twirl Historia around and failing miserably, and even Mikasa, ever composed, allows herself a small smile as she watches the chaos unfold.

And then—your hands are caught in someone else’s.

You blink, surprised, as a man—tall, broad-shouldered, with an easy grin—takes your hand and pulls you into the movement of the dance floor. His grip is firm, his confidence easy, and before you can even register it, you’re being spun into the rhythm of the music.

You offer a polite smile, adjusting to the steps as he twirls you once, twice. He seems friendly enough, his expression open and relaxed, and for a moment, you let yourself get lost in it, let yourself be just another person in a tavern, caught in the joy of the night.

But then—

His hold tightens.

Subtly, but noticeably.

His hand lingers just a little too long on your waist, his grip just a bit firmer than necessary.

Your instincts, dulled by the pleasant haze in your mind, take a moment to catch up. You keep your smile in place, but a quiet unease settles in your stomach. You try to subtly shift your weight, to create some distance between you, but he moves with you, maintaining the closeness.

A polite exit. You just need a polite exit.

You clear your throat lightly, offering a small laugh. “Alright, I think I need a break—”

The man chuckles, still holding you in place. “Come on, one more dance.”

Something in his tone makes your skin prickle—not outright threatening, but entitled, as if your willingness to dance once meant you owed him more.

Your smile tightens. “I should really—”

And then, before you have the chance to finish your sentence, the air changes.

A presence—sharp, heavy, unmistakable—settles behind you.

The man stiffens slightly, his grip loosening just enough for you to slip a step back, as a new voice cuts through the space between you, low and edged with quiet authority.

“Let her go.”

Your breath catches.

Slowly, you turn your head.

Levi stands there, expression unreadable, eyes dark and steady. His posture is relaxed—but in that way, the way that suggests he is anything but. His arms are crossed, but the tension in his shoulders is subtle, the kind you’d only notice if you knew him.

And you do.

The man—who had been all confidence and charm just moments ago—hesitates, his fingers twitching slightly at his sides. He sizes Levi up, as if debating whether or not to push his luck.

He makes the wrong choice.

“She was dancing with me,” the man says, lifting his hands slightly in false innocence, though his tone holds a thread of defiance. “Didn’t seem to mind.”

A sharp, quiet pause.

Levi tilts his head ever so slightly, eyes flickering between you and the man with chilling precision. His voice, when he speaks again, is calm.

“I wasn’t asking.”

The weight of those words settles between them, heavy, immovable.

Something flickers in the man’s face—hesitation, irritation, then a quiet understanding that this is not a fight he wants to pick.

With a huff, he raises his hands in surrender. “Didn’t know she had a guard dog.”

You feel Levi tense, just for a split second.

Before anything can escalate, you step forward, offering the man a sharp, polite smile. “Thank you for the dance,” you say evenly, voice firm. “But I’m done now.”

The man’s eyes linger on you for a moment longer, then finally, he scoffs and turns away, disappearing into the crowd.

The tension lingers, like a blade just barely sheathed.

You exhale slowly, turning fully toward Levi.

His gaze sweeps over you—quick, assessing, making sure you’re unharmed. When he’s satisfied, he clicks his tongue. “You need to be more careful.”

You cross your arms. “I was being careful.”

Levi raises a brow. “Didn’t look like it.”

You huff, rubbing the back of your neck. “I was handling it, Captain.”

Levi doesn’t respond right away. Instead, his eyes flicker over your face again, something unreadable in his expression. Then, finally—

“I know.”

It’s not an admission of fault, not quite. But it is an acknowledgment.

You blink, caught off guard by the quiet weight behind those words.

Before you can say anything, he exhales sharply and steps back. “Oi. You’re reckless.”

You smirk. “You say that like it’s a surprise.”

Levi doesn’t dignify that with a response, just shakes his head. But there’s something different in the way he looks at you, something lingering beneath the usual exasperation.

Something like relief.

And maybe—just maybe—you weren’t the only one who noticed the way he paused tonight.

—

“Well Captain?” You smile, laughing as you sidestep to avoid Sasha twirling with a recently hired chef that you had seen around a lot more recently. “Isn’t the gentleman supposed to offer the lady a dance? Awfully rude to step in without an intention of following through, don’t you think?”

Levi exhales sharply through his nose, unimpressed, arms still crossed as he watches you with that unreadable expression. The tavern is alive around you—figures moving in vibrant swirls of laughter and motion, the wooden floor shaking beneath the weight of stomping boots, the rich hum of music weaving through the air.

But here, in this moment, it’s just you and him.

You smirk, tilting your head. “Come on, Captain. You can’t step in all dramatic like that and not at least pretend to play along.”

Levi doesn’t move, but there’s something assessing in his gaze, something like quiet calculation behind those steel-gray eyes. You wonder if he’s thinking of an escape, a way to dismiss you with one of his usual deadpan remarks.

But then—

A hand.

Not grabbing, not demanding—just a simple extension. A silent answer.

Your breath catches in your throat.

It’s brief, just a flicker of hesitation before his fingers brush yours, just enough to take your hand without giving anything away. His grip is firm, but there’s a carefulness to it, as if he’s aware of the weight behind the action, of the unspoken shift in the space between you.

And then—he moves.

Not in the showy, exaggerated way the others are throwing themselves into the music, but in a way that’s purely Levi—sharp, controlled, precise. His grip on your hand remains steady as he guides you through the steps, his other hand finding the small of your back, light but firm.

For a second, you forget everything else.

The alcohol, the laughter, the blurred movement of the world around you—it all fades into something distant, something inconsequential compared to the quiet gravity of him.

His touch is careful but certain, his movements seamless despite the clear reluctance in his expression. It’s not that he’s uncomfortable—it’s just that Levi Ackerman is not a man who does things without purpose.

And yet, here he is, following through.

You smile, leaning in just slightly, voice barely above the hum of the music. “See? Not so bad, is it?”

Levi scoffs lightly. "You’re lucky I haven’t stepped on your feet.”

You laugh—really laugh, the warmth of it bubbling up in your chest, light and unrestrained. The sound earns you the barest flicker of something in his eyes—not quite amusement, but something close.

The moment stretches, neither of you breaking the rhythm, neither of you pulling away.

And for the first time that night, you’re certain of one thing:

Levi definitely noticed your hair.

The music swells around you, a lively, unrelenting current of sound and motion, but you barely register it. The tavern, the laughter, the blur of bodies dancing past—it all becomes background noise, a distant hum compared to the quiet weight of the moment unfolding between you and Levi.

His hand is steady against yours, his grip firm but never forceful. His other hand, resting lightly at the small of your back, holds no urgency, no demand—just quiet control, a careful presence. He moves with you in that same effortless way he fights—with intention, with precision, with the kind of quiet mastery that makes even the smallest of gestures feel deliberate.

And yet, for all his competence, you can feel the reluctance in him.

Not reluctance toward you, necessarily. But toward the situation. Toward the ease with which he’s letting this happen.

Toward the fact that he is here, dancing with you, indulging this moment when he so rarely indulges anything.

You can see it in the tension just barely visible in his shoulders, in the way his jaw ticks subtly, as if his own body is surprised by the fact that he’s still holding onto you.

You press your lips together, suppressing a smirk. “You’re concentrating too much.”

Levi exhales through his nose, unimpressed. “I don’t dance.”

“You’re dancing right now.”

“Tch. You call this dancing?”

You grin, leaning in just enough that your words are meant only for him. “Well, you are holding me awfully close for someone who doesn’t dance, Captain.”

Levi doesn’t react immediately, doesn’t pull away or push you off with a sharp remark like you half-expect him to. Instead, his grip subtly adjusts—not tightening, not loosening, but shifting in a way that tells you he’s aware.

Aware of the closeness. Aware of the way your breath brushes faintly against his collar. Aware of the warmth of your body so near to his own.

It’s subtle, almost imperceptible, but you feel it—that minuscule shift in his fingers against yours, in the way his hand remains steady at your back, holding you just at the edge of something uncertain.

He doesn’t break the eye contact you didn’t even realize you had been holding.

“…You’re ridiculous,” he mutters, voice low, almost lost beneath the sound of music and laughter around you.

You smile. “And yet, here you are.”

Levi exhales, his thumb grazing the back of your hand as he adjusts his grip—so small a movement, so imperceptible, that you wonder if he even realizes he did it.

Or if he does, and just isn’t stopping himself.

The room spins slightly—not from the alcohol, not from the movement, but from the sheer weight of the moment, from the impossible tenderness that exists in the spaces between words, in the breaths you don’t take, in the lingering warmth of a touch that neither of you are pulling away from.

And for the first time since you pulled him into this, you realize something.

You’re testing him.

Not just to see if he noticed your hair, not just to push his limits, but to see if he will choose to let this moment exist.

If he will choose to let himself stay.

Your heart pounds as you take a breath. “Levi—”

A crash from the other side of the room interrupts you, followed by loud, drunken shouting.

Levi’s body tenses immediately, his hand at your back twitching as his head whips toward the commotion. The moment between you shatters instantly, replaced by sharp awareness, by the cold snap of duty.

He doesn’t say a word. He just lets go.

The loss of his touch is instant, like stepping into cold air after being wrapped in warmth. The shift is so sharp, so complete, that it almost makes you doubt whether the moment you just shared was real at all.

Levi steps back, his expression neutral again, unreadable as he scans the room, already assessing.

You swallow, forcing yourself to do the same—to shake it off, to pretend like your pulse isn’t still pounding in your ears, like the ghost of his hands on you isn’t still lingering on your skin.

He glances back at you, his gaze flickering over you once, checking—like he’s making sure you’re still steady, still standing, before he turns his attention back to the rest of the room.

“Stay here,” he mutters. And then, just like that, he’s gone, moving toward the source of the disturbance with the same effortless sharpness that makes him humanity’s strongest.

You watch him go, exhaling a breath you didn’t realize you were holding.

The music carries on, the tavern keeps spinning, but you remain rooted in place, heart still racing, the memory of his warmth still imprinted on your skin.

And for the first time tonight, you realize—

You don’t need Levi to say that he noticed you.

Because in the way he held onto you, even for just a moment—he already did.

—

You scan the room to see if any of your friends are in danger. After seeing them slowly making their way back to the corner table, you bunch up your skirt before striding across the room to Erwin. "Commander, what is it? Where's Captain? Squad Leader Hange? What are my orders, sir?"

You stand unflinching before him, but your heart beats thunderously, unsure of where the Captain went and if he'll be okay.

Erwin’s sharp blue eyes flicker down to you as you approach, his expression unreadable but steady, as always. The weight of command rests on his shoulders like a mantle, effortless in the way only a man like him can carry. He does not startle, does not seem surprised that you’ve come to him first, as if he expected you would.

His gaze scans over the tavern, over the shifting figures of soldiers and civilians alike, before settling back on you. “It was just a minor scuffle,” he says, voice calm, deliberate. “A few drunk patrons getting too comfortable around our cadets. Captain Levi and Squad Leader Hange are handling it.”

Your fingers tighten slightly against the fabric of your skirt, heart still hammering in your chest. “Should I assist?”

Erwin studies you for a fraction longer than necessary before speaking. “No. The situation is under control.” A pause. “But it’s good that you came to me first.”

Your lips press together, trying to steady yourself. “It’s my duty.”

Erwin gives the smallest nod, an unspoken acknowledgment that you understand what it means to be a soldier, even in moments like this. Even with your pulse still thrumming from something that has nothing to do with a threat.

You inhale sharply, eyes flickering toward the direction Levi disappeared. “Where did Captain Levi go?”

“He’s outside.” Erwin’s voice remains as even as ever, but something in the way he watches you is too perceptive, too knowing. “Ensuring the situation is fully resolved.”

Your stomach twists, but you keep your stance firm. “Permission to check on him, sir?”

A pause.

Not hesitation, not refusal—just assessment.

Then, Erwin gives the faintest tilt of his chin. “Go.”

You don’t waste a second.

—

The cold air hits you as soon as you step outside. The tavern’s warmth is instantly swallowed by the crisp night breeze, the scent of rain still lingering from the earlier drizzle. Lanterns flicker dimly against the darkness, casting long, stretching shadows over the cobblestone streets.

And then—you see him.

Levi stands a few paces ahead, his back to you, his posture rigid but controlled. Even from here, you can see the way his fingers flex slightly at his sides, how his head tilts just barely, listening to something unseen.

There’s a man at his feet—conscious but slumped against the wall, groaning, as if the fight had been drained out of him in an instant.

Levi had taken care of it. Of course he had.

But you don’t care about the drunk.

You care about him.

You step forward, boots tapping against stone, and his head immediately shifts at the sound. He doesn’t fully turn—doesn’t have to. He already knows it’s you.

“Captain.” Your voice is steadier than your pulse. “Are you alright?”

For a moment, Levi doesn’t respond. He exhales slowly through his nose, a habit you recognize—one he does when he’s recalibrating, shifting from fight to stillness.

Then, at last, he turns.

The dim lantern light catches against the sharp angles of his face, highlighting the slight furrow between his brows, the tension still visible in the line of his jaw. His uniform is slightly rumpled from movement, but there’s no sign of injury—no blood, no bruising, just Levi, standing in the quiet aftermath of something already finished.

He studies you for a moment, eyes scanning—searching, checking—as if making sure you’re still in one piece.

“Tch.” He clicks his tongue, looking away. “You should be inside.”

You step closer, searching his face. “So should you.”

Levi exhales, the barest hint of exasperation beneath the breath. “Did Erwin send you?”

You shake your head. “I came on my own.”

At that, something flickers in his expression. Not surprise—more like quiet understanding.

Your fingers twitch slightly at your sides, unsure of what to say, unsure if there’s anything to say that he’ll actually listen to. So instead, you just—watch him.

The lines of his face, the way the dim glow of lanterns traces the edges of his expression, how his eyes—normally so impassive—seem darker under the weight of the night.

For a moment, neither of you speak.

Then—

“You’re shaking.”

It’s so quiet that you almost miss it.

You blink. “What?”

Levi’s gaze flickers to your hands, and you realize, belatedly, that he’s right—your fingers are trembling, ever so slightly, still buzzing with the leftover adrenaline from the evening.

You open your mouth to dismiss it, to say something lighthearted, to wave it off as nothing, but—

Levi moves first.

His hand—warm, calloused, steady—reaches out. He doesn’t take yours, doesn’t grip your wrist, but he touches. A brush of fingertips against your knuckles, a fleeting connection, just enough to ground you in place.

Your breath catches.

It lasts only a second.

Then, just as quickly, he pulls away, as if realizing what he did, as if catching himself before he lingers too long.

You swallow, staring at him.

“Go inside,” he murmurs, voice quieter than before.

Your heart is still hammering, but it’s not from the cold anymore.

“…You’re sure you’re okay?” you ask, softer this time.

Levi holds your gaze, something unreadable in his own.

Then, with the barest tilt of his chin—

“I’m fine.”

And this time, you believe him.

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lazyexcuse · 2 years ago

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*Y/n and Levi training*

Levi, wiping the blood from his lips with a smirk: “Oh yeah? Is that the best you can do?”

Y/n, holding back tears: “Yeah actually, I’m trying really hard..”

Levi, standing up straight, shocked: “Oh.. ok.. hey— it’s ok—“

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ryan-moss · 1 year ago

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alright so! this is one of my first animatics, i hope u guys like it, and id love to do the whole song eventually its got some genius lyrics for tma (its forest by twenty one pilots btw, a blast from the past) id be thankful if u reblogged it!! alright thats all bye

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strawberrybuni · 11 months ago

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(PRE-RELATIONSHIP) WHEN THEY PROVE YOU WRONG

Characters: Levi, Hange, Eren, Armin, Erwin, Mikasa, Reiner, Jean, Annie, Sasha, Miche, & Yelena Summary: You mention to them that they wouldn't date you for your size, but they're quick to prove you wrong CW: fluffy fluff, comfort, plus sized!reader A/N: request complete! I hope you enjoyy :3

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linalieana · 1 year ago

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BAJI KEISUKE, itadori yuji, kisaki tetta, kaminari denki, prob jean kirschtein, connie springer, sasha braus, nishinoya yuu, tanaka, hinata shoyo + ur favs <3

ctto <3 n i can't believe the other one kinda blew up aaaa thank u so so so much, it motivates me to do more <3 luv u much 🫶🏻

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abiatackerman · 1 year ago

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Interrupted by brats

The air in the mess hall cracks with tension as Jean and Eren square off. Their fists fly, and the other scouts gather around, placing bets and cheering like it is some twisted spectator sport. Mikasa’s stoic expression betrays her amusement, while Sasha bites on a potato, her eyes wide with excitement.

But then, the doors swing open as Levi and you step in. The entire scene freezes. Even the birds outside seemed to hold their breath. Levi's glare can melt steel, and the room temperature drops by a few degrees.

"Brats......"

He mutters, his voice is like a blade slicing through the chaos.

"What the hell is this nonsense?"

Eren and Jean stumble apart immediately and you sigh. They straighten their uniforms, faces showing pure fear as they avoid eye contact with their captain.

Levi doesn't waste time. He kicks Jean's abdomen, since he was the one who started the fight. Then he kicks Eren's ass hard making him stumble forward.

"You want to fight? Fine. I'll give you a reason to regret it."

His knuckles crack ominously and you sigh.

Levi's really pissed today. You just told him that you're leaving for a week since your dad has become sick and you haven't visited your family for a while. He's pissed thinking that it's gonna be a damn long annoying week without you. Just when you two were about to kiss, Historia rushes to Levi's office to inform him about the fight. Levi is pissed about the interruption and now here he is, beating them up.

"Captain, I...."

Jean tries to speak but Levi stops him.

"Shut up!" Levi snaps. "And you, Jaeger."

He turns to Eren, who stands there massaging his ass.

"You're not innocent either. Next time you want to throw punches, do it in private. Got it?"

Eren nods so vigorously that his head may detach from his neck.

"Y-yes, sir!"

Levi stares at him for a while then looks at you again. You can tell by his looks he's thinking about punishing them. Your face softens as you look at Jean's and Eren's nervous faces, feeling sympathy for them.

"Both of you will clean this hall everyday for this whole week. One more fight and I'll increase the area of your cleaning also add daily laps to your lazy assed routine. Now all of you, out!"

Levi orders in his pissed tone as everyone rushes out of the hall. They all are relieved that Levi has just punished Eren and jean. Not them.

"Don't you think you are being too strict?"

You ask as the cadets leave the hall.

"I mean this hall is huge... Cleaning it every day is tough by only two people."

You say softly as Levi walks towards you.

"Though their behaviours are shitty they have loyal friends. I bet they all will clean it together."

He says as he grabs your chin.

"You're just too kind, angel. They'll be fine, don't worry."

You nod and remove his hand from your face and hug him tightly, wrapping your arms around his waist.

"You know? You looked so sexy and hot when you were beating them up. Everyone was looking at you with fear and you were the strongest intimidating leader, also your commanding voice... I did feel bad for them but... Shit... I'm fucking turned on."

Levi chuckles as his face is pressed against your head and he sniffs your sweet smell. His one hand wraps around your neck and the other one plays with your hair.

"Tch... You have a weird choice, but I'm not complaining."

He speaks in an amusing tone and removes his head from your hair to look at your face. He cups your face, his expression is soft with affection as he kisses your forehead.

"Just be safe for the week, ok? And make sure to come back to me unscarred."

He speaks, his voice full of affection. You chuckle.

"Even if I get in trouble, I'll use the combats you taught me. I'll be fine, don't worry."

You say smiling cheekily as Levi's eyes soften again. Your smile is his greatest weakness, he can't help but melt every time he sees it. And when he knows he's the reason behind it, his mind overflows with ecstasy.

He leans down and presses his lips softly against yours. You hum and close your eyes as you grip his shirt, only to feel his thumping heartbeat against your palm. His thumbs caress your cheeks as your lips move in a slow, soft and rhythmic way.

Just when Levi's tongue gently brushes against your lower lips and you are about to part your lips, suddenly, the mess hall's door swings open. Sasha and Connie stumble in, revealing Eren, Jean, Armin and Mikasa behind them. They freeze, cheeks flushed, eyes wide, as if caught in a forbidden act.

"Errr... Captain... we..."

Sasha tries to speak nervously, her cheeks pink.

"We were just..... Looking for the potato Sasha left behind."

Armin speaks shyly, his face flushed red. You try to suppress your smile as you look at the pissed expression on Levi's face.

"You shits were spying on us? What were you brats looking at? Never saw a man and woman kissing before?"

Levi speaks in a calm tone but you know he's fuming inside. Everyone turns red at his words, even Mikasa blushes.

"Eren and Jean will clean this mess hall, alone! And you all shits will clean the whole field. I'll check your work in the afternoon. If I see even a single darnel picking out of the grass, I swear I'll kick your lazy asses. As for the girls, you all will run 50 laps and no food until you clean your shits up. Mark my words!"

Levi speaks firmly as their eyes widened. You look at them sympathically as Sasha seems like she is about to cry.

"OUT!"

Levi says in a slightly louder tone than usual making them flinch as they rushes out.

"Damn brats. What are they? 10? Bothering us like annoying bugs."

He speaks in a pissed voice as you sigh and hug his neck to calm him down.

"They are just kids, Levi. They probably got curious when Sasha came back here for her potato and caught us kissing. Forgive them."

Levi relaxes in you arms as he starts to kiss your neck.

"Tch, I shouldn't care for them like this when they're this annoying."

You chuckle and tilt your head to let him kiss you. You rub his back.

"You're a great father figure, Levi. They also knows it."

You giggle slightly at the tickling feeling as his breath fans over you neck and his lips keep caressing you skin.

"I'll try to be a good father to our brat too. I won't say shitty words and won't be harsh. I promise."

He mumbles in a low voice as his grip on your waist tightens.

"I know you will, love."

You say softly as he removes his head to look at your face.

"Tch, I'll miss you, smartass..."

He says softly as he kisses your forehead.

"Me too."

You say and he presses his lips against yours again. Though this time you two kiss each other for a long time without any interruptions.

And this time, no brats were peeking on you two either.

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j2hoes · 11 months ago

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Eshay Baby. (Anthony Vaughn x Chook's Sister Reader)

Word Count: 5.8K

Y/N Cooper and Anthony Vaughn had a complicated relationship, which becomes even more complex following the reveal of the incest map.

WARNING: This work is not intended for those under the age of eighteen as it does have mature content. This story deals with alcohol, sexual content, drugs, explicit language, violence, death and triggering topics such as sexual assault and abuse.

A/N: I really hope you enjoy this fic as much as I do, I am a sucker for an ex's to lovers trope! This will be an ongoing series with each chapter correlating to a different episode! Love you! x

Fuck you Monday.

I am not a bad person. At least, I don’t believe I am. Research suggests that people become products of their environments, in fact, there’s an entire theory surrounding the self-fulfilling prophecy which suggests that if environmental factors such as the people and community surrounding you believe you will turn out a certain way, you will. It’s something to do with the phrase ‘if that’s what people think I am, then that’s what I will be.’ For as long as I’ve been alive, I have done my best to combat this. Not wanting to prove the countless social workers, mental health professionals, teachers and police correct. I am a good person.

My brother on the other hand, that’s slightly more complicated. He’s four years older than me, he understands and remembers more of our childhood than I do. It’s not something that we often talk about, him opting to avoid the subject entirely not wanting to reminisce on the past. His words not mine. I don’t blame him for this, nothing I can remember is positive. Being passed from one distant relative to the next, each being significantly worse than the last. Until one day we ended up at the home. I can only imagine what other horrors he may remember.

Hence why I stated it’s complicated, everything he does, he does for us. That’s the way it’s always been. Not once has he failed to protect me, agreeing to be my legal guardian the moment he turned eighteen in order to remove me from the clutches of any government mandated home. I’ll forever be grateful to him for that, and so I could never argue that he isn’t a selfless man. Not when it comes to family.

Others may disagree with me, believing he is cruel, callous and cold. Inherently evil is a term that has been used to describe him many times before. I’ll be the first to admit that there are times when I don’t agree with his actions. However, I don’t believe this defines him as a person. People are so complex and have many different layers that somebody cannot be defined by one small thing. So would I say he’s a good person? No, but I also wouldn’t say he’s a bad person. He’s just different.

“Your brother said to tell you he’s setting off in ten minutes so to make sure you’re ready.”

The soft voice at my doorway startles me, too focused on applying my lipgloss to notice the boy standing in the doorway. As I glance up at him through my mirror, I’m hit by the unmistakable stench of marijuana that seems to flood the room. My nose scrunches, slightly disgusted by the thought of my brother and his friends getting high in the living room at eight am on a monday morning. Continuing to apply multiple layers of the shimmery pink gloss, I notice the figure is still standing in my doorway, his back turned to me, stance appearing almost awkward as he scratches the back of his head nervously.

“Cash you can come in.”

He turns to face me, hesitantly stepping through the threshold into my bedroom with a small smile on his face. Closing the old wooden door behind him, only to almost be knocked out by the numerous bags I have hung up on the back of my door.

“That’s a lot of bags.” He comments, resulting in a small laugh from me due to him stating the obvious.

Beginning to gather my textbooks, notebooks and any other supplies I may need for school, I notice Cash standing silently simply observing my bedroom. It’s a stark contrast to the rest of the house. Walls painted a burnt amber with photos and posters plastered up anywhere I could reach. Crocheted blankets are thrown over every piece of furniture in the room and my window stays wide open, allowing the bright morning light to flood the room, the gentle breeze blowing just enough to allow a melodic hum to reverberate through my wind chime.

“Your bedroom is nice. It’s homely.” Cash tells me, waiting patiently as I continue to throw things into my bag.

“Not a chance in hell was I letting Chook decorate my bedroom with graffiti.” I laugh, throwing my chunky black cardigan over my shoulders before the eshay opens the door for me, being the gentleman that he is and allowing me to exit first. “There’s another spray paint to cover a skatepark in here as it is.”

My finger traces one of the many swirls of blue spray paint that lines the hallway as I speak, eliciting a chuckle from the boy that follows behind me. Entering the lounge, I find Jayden and Tilla sprawled out on the sofa, eyes glazed over and it’s clear that they’re both stoned out of their minds. Chook sits on the armchair that he’s claimed as his own, nobody else dares to sit there, knowing it’s his seat. He’s playing with the car keys in his hands, eyes fixed on the unconscious man laid out at his feet. Occasionally nudging him with his foot in an attempt to humor himself.

“Who’s that?” I question, capturing my brother’s attention for the first time since we set foot in the lounge.

“Fuck knows brah, couldn’t handle his drinks though clearly.”

With one last surprisingly gentle kick to the stomach, Chook rises from the chair. Ruffling my hair as he strolls past me and towards the front door, much to my annoyance. I sigh quietly, swiftly smoothing my hair down, to which Cash does his best to muffle his laugh as we follow my brother out the door. Stepping over yet another unconscious man as we leave the house.

Hartley High is only a twenty minute drive, most of which I spend in silence, trying my best to enjoy the drum and bass that erupts out of the speakers as we fly down the streets of Sydney. Chook was never one for following the speed limit, no matter how many times I lectured him on the importance of driving safely.

We pull into the car park outside of school with an ear piercing screech, slamming to a halt directly outside the gates, the unnecessary amount of noise causes many students to look in our direction. Many whispering to their friends as they gawk at us, I do my best to keep my head down as I clamber out of the vehicle. Embarrassed by the commotion Chook has caused.

“Don’t get expelled!” Chook yells out of the car window as Cash and I trudge reluctantly towards the quad. Not wanting to dignify him with a response, I simply throw my middle finger up behind me, hearing his raucous laughter followed by the screech of his tires on the asphalt once again.

“You reckon this year will be any better?” Cash inquires, knuckles white due to how tight he is clenching the strap of his fanny pack that is thrown over his shoulder. He’s nervous. Contrary to what people believe, Cash is a sweet boy. He’s so loving, caring, considerate and kind, he has a lot to offer the world we live in. Nobody seems to see this though. Believing Cash is a good for nothing eshay that will make nothing of himself upon leaving school, most likely following in the footsteps of his mother and ending up in prison. Even he himself believes this.

“I don’t know mate, maybe for you, I mean you technically don’t even need to be here. I don’t have a choice unfortunately.”

“Yeah but that just means you’re stuck with me for another year kiddo.”

“I am literally a year younger than you.” I sulk, giving him a gentle shove in order to express my annoyance. “Besides, you wouldn’t have screwed me if you saw me as a kid.”

Cash stops in his tracks completely, I smirk, pleased that I’ve rendered him completely speechless and offer him a quick wink from over my shoulder as he jogs to catch up to me. We agreed to never speak of it. A one night hook up when we were both heavily under the influence of certain illegal substances. My heart was in pieces following the breakdown of mine and a particular church going brunette’s secret relationship. If you could even call it a relationship, we never exactly labeled anything, nor made anything public. However, it felt as though my heart had shattered, I’d never experienced anything like that before. Not even the pain of my childhood compared to this.

One thing led to another and Cash and I were stumbling into bed together. Both of us knew it was wrong, Chook would kill Cash if he ever found out. Fortunately it only happened once and while I wouldn’t say that I regret it, it did definitely put a strain on our friendship for a while. Mostly due to him being terrified of me telling my brother.

Remembering the memory, I can’t help but smile to myself. Even if it was just for that one night, Cash made me feel whole again. Like I was worthy of finding love. The dopamine from the positive recollection seems to crash like a wave over my body, uplifting my mood drastically despite heading into what is ultimately prison for the next seven hours. That is until I catch a glimpse of the one person I was hoping to avoid completely for the next year.

Anthony Vaughn.

“Oi there’s a fully gacked sex map in the old stairwell.” Shouts from the redheaded girl catch my attention and I’m grateful to be provided a distraction. “It’s called the incest map!”

Students from all directions flock together in a sprint towards the old stairwell. The scene could be described as something out of a nature documentary when a pack of wild animals chase after their prey together. It’s wild and chaotic, completely undignified. So, with a quick glance at one another, Cash and I also follow the crowd, taking off in a run to identify what a ‘sex map’ truly is, and why it is so interesting that the entirety of our school is racing at full speed just to catch a glimpse.

I thank my lucky stars that I’m not claustrophobic when I eventually manage to squeeze my way through the horde of students. Names are scrawled in huge letters across the wall, each with different lines and symbols linking one to another. There’s a key chart to the left hand side and it’s safe to say nobody’s sexual endeavours were safe due to how graphic the key chart was.

The usual suspects are on the map, those who aren’t quiet about their partaking in hookup culture, such as Darren and Dusty. Those in relationships are also unsurprising, for example Missy and Sasha are of course linked, having only just recently broken up. Other names however do manage to shock me, for one I was not expecting to see Quinni’s name on the map, nor was I expecting Cash. Following the three lines connected to his name, it’s only then that I realize in bright red letters accompanied by a pair of devil horns, is my name.

Y/N - hooked up - Cash. Y/N - blowie - Spider. Y/N - fucked - Ant. Y/N - destined - Ant.

With each passing second it feels like my heart has stopped, secrets revealed to the world that were supposed to never see the light of day. How did anybody know about this? Sure, Spider may have blabbed about me giving him a blowjob, most likely bragging to his two best mates about it as though I’m his latest conquest. However, what happened between Cash and I, as well as Ant and I was meant to be kept quiet.

With trembling hands, I begin to anxiously scan the room, looking for any sign that somebody other than myself may have noticed my name. Catching the eye of the brunette, who stands timidly between Dusty and Spider, I discern that he is just as concerned as I am. Fearful of the consequences of this coming out.

“Yo Ant, you fucked the eshay’s sister? Nice one bro.” Dusty shouts, clapping his friend on the back which only leads to the red blush on his face to creep to an even deeper crimson.

“You got further with her than I ever did.” Spider comments, a mischievous smirk spread across his lips. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

Ant simply lowers his head, eyes focusing on his shoes which appear to be a lot more interesting than the map in front of him. I can’t lie and say it doesn’t hurt that he won’t speak about us, but at the same time, I understand. With mates like his, I would want to keep things hidden from them too, especially if this is how they react. Not to mention his overly religious family upbringing and the overwhelming amount of shame he is afraid of bringing on his family.

“Hey, you okay?” Cash whispers, hand faintly grazing mine in a subtle attempt to offer his support.

“I was just about to ask you the same thing.” Offering the mullet wearing boy a forced smile, trying to cover up the embarrassment of suddenly being the center of attention.

Continuing to stare at the map in disbelief, only the shouts of rowdy teenagers can be heard as they find more and more connections on the map that they hadn’t seen upon their first inspection. A few even run out in tears, the map ruining many people’s relationships, outing people and just causing pure humiliation for everybody that has their name scribbled across the wall.

“Hey, do you reckon if we ask real nice, Y/N will let us double dick her?” Spider asks Ant obnoxiously loud, nudging him as they both look over in my direction. Humorless expression evident on my face. “What, we’ve both already been there.”

Spider’s comment is directed to me, with him and Dusty both finding the utmost amusement in the entire situation. Ant, on the other hand, looks as though he wants the floor to swallow him whole, unable to make eye contact with me.

“Are you sure you’d be able to get it up? You and I both know how difficult it was for you last time and that was just for a blowie.” Without giving Spider a chance to respond, I’m pushing through the sea of teenagers, who are now staring eagle eyed between the blonde boy and myself. Invested in the very minor argument between us, a chorus of laughter can be heard at Spider’s expense. Even Dusty seems to take amusement in the mortification of his friend. As I brush past the trio, it’s hard to ignore the self-consciousness on their leader’s face. I can’t help but feel a small sense of pride, knowing that my comment really got under his skin. Eyes trailing over each of the guys, I notice that Ant is already looking at me, a regretful look on his face.

Unlike his two mates, Ant has always been the more caring of the three. Whilst still partaking, somewhat reluctantly, in the shenanigans that the other boys rope him into, he has always had more of a guilty consciousness. Often disclosing the amount of regret and guilt he felt due to some of their actions. Though, he made me swear that information to secrecy, not wanting the boys to view him as weaker. It’s one thing we regularly argued about, with him being unable to fathom the idea that having morals and a consciousness doesn’t make you any less of a man.

The deafening shrill of the school bell sounds whilst I stomp across the quad, alerting me of the fact that I should be headed towards the gym for the mandatory back to school assembly. Yet, I can’t bring myself to face it. Wanting to avoid Spider for a little while longer while I can in the hopes of steering clear of another confrontation. Half an hour into the new school year and I’m already wagging, what a great start.

Without turning to look back, I can hear the shuffle of feet as everybody begins to pile out of the old stairwell. Heading into the main school building, still, I tread on. Doing my best to sneak behind the science block and finding solace in the old dunnies that were closed off to students back in the nineties. Technically, nobody is supposed to be back here, I’m risking detention just by being here, though Cash and I continue to use it as a safe space to hide from the world whenever we need peace.

Rummaging through my bag, I’m quick to find the box of Marlboro Gold’s that I always keep stashed at the bottom, just on the odd occasion that I do feel the urge to smoke. It used to be a rare occurrence, these days, unfortunately it seems to be more of a recurring problem. I’ve hidden the habit from just about everyone in my life, not that Chook would care, he’s done far worse that I ever have. I just don't want people to perceive me as any less that they do now, I know smoking is a dirty horrible habit and yet I can’t seem to quit. So, as I spark my lighter, inhaling the toxic fumes, I begin to take comfort in the calm that fills my body from the lungs outward.

“Shit, sorry, I didn’t think anyone was gonna be in here.”

My eyes sweep up from the ground, and if the baggy jeans and tie dyed jumper weren’t enough of a give away as to who stood before me the cross chain hanging from his neck certainly did. It’s the first time he’s actually spoken to me directly since the night everything came crumbling down eight weeks ago. When my eyes lock with his, I can’t help but take in his beauty as if it’s the first time I’ve ever seen him and before I can react the cigarette is falling out of my fingers.

“I didn’t know you smoked.”

He points to the ciggie that is now beginning to burn out on the concrete floor. With an awkward laugh, I quickly pick it up, stubbing it out on the wall, humiliated that he caught me.

“I don’t really,” Playing with the ends of my hair as I desperately try to think of an excuse that doesn’t truly reveal the extent of my habit.

“Just needed to destress after this morning.”

“Yeah, crazy morning, right?” Ant asks, leaning against the doorframe as he attempts to make small talk with me. “Actually, do you have another one of those?”

With raised eyebrows I nod swiftly, pulling the pack out of my bag and offering them to him along with my lighter. He lights his and I do the same, after all I didn’t exactly get to finish the first one on account of dropping it on the ground.

“You wagging assembly too?”

My voice is quiet, unsure on whether he actually wants me to make conversation with him or he’d prefer to sit in silence. Despite my best attempts to not make it obvious, I watch as he takes a drag from the ciggie, allowing the smoke to delicately fall from his lips. It’s awkward not knowing where I stand with him, sure, what happened was a while ago now and I’d assumed we’d both moved on but that doesn’t make the entire situation any less awkward.

“Couldn’t face it, Spider and Dusty wouldn’t stop hounding me for all the details and I just needed some space.” Ant admits, picking at the skin around his fingers between drags.

“Oh right, I can leave if you want some space, I don’t mind.”

Grabbing my bag and hauling myself off the window ledge, I throw the end of my ciggie to the ground, ready to leave. That is until his hand grabs mine gently, his touch soft as I’m forced to stop and look at him.

“No, stay. You should stay.”

Ant offers me a small smile before letting go of my hand, the touch so fleeting and yet it still manages to make my heart flutter even just the tiniest bit. Sitting beside him on the cold, mucky floor, not minding the dirt if it means that Ant and I are one step closer to mending our friendship. Truthfully, I miss him. I miss him as a friend more so than anything. Our bond was one that you don’t find much in life, one that others struggle to comprehend.

“I owe you an apology.” His words catch me off guard, unaware that he felt the need to apologize to me, let alone, doing so on the first day back at school. Granted it hasn’t been any ordinary first day back. “I was a complete dickhead to you and you didn’t deserve it-”

“Ant you don’t need to explain yourself.”

“Nah, I do. I think I knew I couldn’t be the guy you deserved, and I got scared. It’s no excuse, I know that. Just believe me, I didn’t mean any of the stuff I said to you that night, I was so pissed, honestly, I hardly remember any of it. All I know is I woke up with the worst hangover of my life and you weren’t there.” He stops for a moment, collecting his thoughts with furrowed eyebrows, trying his best to put what he wants to say into words. “You weren’t there and then I saw the messages. Y/N, I’m so sorry. I didn’t ever want to hurt you.”

He’s staring at me intently, eyes trying to find any glimmer of emotion on my face in an attempt to determine what I’m thinking. Opening my mouth to respond, I find myself rendered completely speechless. As I focus on Ant, I can see the worry in his eyes. Uneasy as to what I may have to say.

“Shit, sorry, I’m no good with words, I-”

“Stop talking Ant.” I mumble, putting an end to his rant before he can even properly begin. “Cheers for the apology, it means a lot.”

“Do you hate me?” The question is blurted out before he can stop himself. Shocking even himself judging by the way his widened followed by his head falling to his hands.

“I could never hate you. You should know that.” I tell him, his whole body instantly less tense as the relief floods through him. “I’ve actually really missed my friend. We should’ve never complicated things.”

I almost miss it, but there’s a flash of pain in the browns of his eyes as I say those last words, though he nods in agreement. The silence that follows is no longer awkward, instead it’s tranquil. Plainly embracing the warmth of the early morning sun in one another’s presence feels relaxing compared to the events that unfolded prior. Blissfully enjoying the reblossoming of our once torn apart friendship.

“If it isn’t Anthony Vaughn and Y/N Y/LN. You’ve not even been back a day and you’re already wagging.” Ms Woods’ tone is extremely unimpressed as she addresses us, evidently not happy that we’re getting into trouble this quickly. Ant and I can’t help but hold in matching mischievous grins. “My office now!”

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------- “So what were you and Ant doing in the dunnies together?” Cash mumbles the minute my brother is out of earshot and inside Harry’s diner, no doubt trying to chat up all the girls who are trying to eat their chippies in peace.

Slapping him straight in the chest, my eyes flicker towards the door of the diner, wary that Chook will pop out at any second and overhear our conversation. He feigns annoyance, dramatically throwing his hand up to his chest, acting as if I’ve just shot him.

“Oh my god, nothing!”

“I saw your names on the map Y/N, can you blame me for thinking you were trying to cop a root?”

“Shut the fuck up! Nothing happened okay?” I whisper as aggressively as I can, playing with the hem of my pinstripe mini dress in the hopes that I can distract myself from this conversation.

“I dunno, Amerie seemed to think you two were destined.”

“Who’s destined?”

Chook’s voice alarms me, head snapping up to spot the slightly older, male version of myself walking only mere feet away from Cash and I. His casual demeanor suggests he hasn’t overheard the rest of our conversation for which I’m thankful. Locking eyes with Cash, I shake my head in the subtlest way possible so he knows not to say a word. If Chook found out about the map, not only would I be dead, but Cash as well, so it’s in the best interest of both of us not to open our mouths about yesterday’s events.

“Spider and his imaginary girlfriend. That boy is gonna be in a serious relationship with his hand for the foreseeable future.” The lie slips off my tongue so easily that it’s rather concerning. Chook doesn’t question me, though why would he? I learned from the best.

“Sure. You prepared for the cemetery tonight kid?” Chook asks Cash, not even bothering to look up at him as he stashes the boot of the car with countless amounts of junk food he had just collected from Harry’s. “Thank god you stayed at school for another year, since this little bitch didn’t wanna take over as our connect.”

“My bad that I didn’t wanna be running around, pushing drugs for you for the rest of my school life.” I argue, Chook pulling faces as I speak in response. Deciding that this is an argument not worth having today, after all, it’s one we’ve had many times before.

“Yeah, all good brah.” Cash chimes in, answering Chook’s question to put an end to our petty argument before we can take it even further. Before we can get physically violent, even if it is only in a playful manner.

“You two best get going hey, maximize profit and all that.”

Cash doesn’t need any further instruction, hopping on his motorbike after passing me his fanny pack to store in the bag on the back. Something he always does in order to ensure that all his supply is kept perfectly safe while he drives. I’d consider it smart if I didn’t know it was drugs he was keeping safe. Chook jumps in his car, nodding in our direction as he flies out of the car park with Jayden and Tilla shouting out of the window at us. I can’t help but smile at their antics.

Cash offers me a hand on to the back of his bike, hiking my tiny dress up even further so that I can throw my leg over the vehicle. Wrapping my arms around his waist tightly, he watches in his mirror for me to nod before taking off. A habit he picked up when he first began to drive me around on what I like to call his ‘death trap’.

Dance music is belting from the many speakers when we arrive at the cemetery, a fire pit glowing in the middle of the makeshift dance floor as people crowd around it. The sun is already setting as we arrive, illuminating the party in a way that looks angelic. Upon reaching one of the many piles of drinks, it’s hard to notice Amerie dancing crazily, along with Darren, Quinni and Malachai. I point it out to Cash, the pair of us surprised that she has any friends left considering her actions.

Parting ways with the eshay I find taking a swig from one of the numerous vodka bottles before grabbing a bottle of bus, watching as Cash immediately begins to get to work, Sasha instantly running over to him the moment she spots him alone. Rolling my eyes, I plant myself further away from the party, sat with my back against one of the decrepit headstones.

I’ve always been more of an introvert. Opting to be a wallflower and observe rather than be the center of attention, unlike my fellow classmates who all seem to thrive when the spotlight is on them. I hate Amerie for forcing me into that spotlight.

Between sips of the slightly warm lager, I begin to roll myself a joint, figuring I may as well attempt to have a good time at the party. Even if it isn’t my ideal Tuesday night. I couldn’t let Cash come on his own though, not when he’s working for my brother.

“You are a bad girl Y/N Y/L/N.” Ant’s voice shouts from a short distance away, strolling towards me with a cheeky grin slapped across his face. “What is this? The second time I’ve caught you smoking now?”

“Right well I was just about to offer to share this with you but I guess not now.” I joke, lighting it up as Ant flops down beside me. “And technically, I haven’t even smoked this yet so you’ve only caught me once.”

“It totally counts!” Ant argues, waiting patiently as I take a couple of puffs before handing him the joint. “How’d your brother take it when he found out about the map?”

“You’re safe if that’s what you’re asking. I haven’t told him and he’s not the type of bloke that answers the phone when Woodsy rings.” He hands the joint back to me, fingers brushing mine tenderly. “Your mum?

“Not great. Amerie really fucked things up for me, I have to go to church three more times a week now, all because of one wristy and well you know.”

“Did you tell her the truth about us?” I inquire, wondering if he did come clean completely about our situationship of sorts.

“Nah, I told her it was just the once.” He admits, glancing at me sheepishly, almost embarrassed to recount the memory. “Figured that was better than telling her the truth. I may have also turned her that you were my girlfriend at the time, you know, to kind of make it better. Not that she approves of premarital sex or anything and I know we didn’t label what we were but it sounded better in the moment. I hope that’s okay.”

“Lying to your mother Anthony, that’s not very christian of you!” I gasp, to which he snatches the joint back out of my hand in retaliation, laughing along with me.

“Fuck yourself.” Ant chuckles, blowing the smoke directly in my face without any warning, causing me to descend into a fit of coughs.

“What’s the deal with you and Cash anyway? You two a thing now?” Ant’s not looking up at me when he speaks, all his attention fixated on the crowd of teenagers partying in the distance. Anxiously pulling blades of grass from the ground beneath me, I continue to gaze at him, a sigh falling from my lips as I had hoped he hadn’t noticed the line between Cash and my name. It was inevitable that it was going to come up, I had just hoped it would be something that people skirted around, not asking any direct questions.

“Nah.” The word is faint, shaking my head, my eyes fall on the boy in question, completely unaware that we are speaking about him as he stands in conversation with Darren. “We’re just mates.”

The boy nods besides me though I can tell he doesn’t truly believe me, still unable to look in my direction. Nudging him slightly, I give a small smile when he does hesitantly face me. “We hooked up once a few weeks ago, I was pretty much black out and he was just there. It was a fucking stupid decision.”

“Just mates though?” Ant asks, more of a rhetorical question, as if to reassure himself, much to my confusion as I can’t see why it would matter to him whether we were just mates or not. “Okay but who was better?”

Bloodshot eyes and a lazy smile indicate to me that the joint has hit him quicker than either of us expected. Warm blush present on his cheeks, his head tipped back against the headstone , gazing up at the stars that begin to light up the late summer skies.

“You’re so stoned.” I comment, completely dodging the question in the hopes that he’s too high to remember what he had even asked.

“Just like old times, yeah.”

Ant’s fingers brush over my hand just barely, the touch so slight that I wouldn’t have felt it had I not been looking in that direction. Thumb softly tracing circles across the back of my palm, skin feeling as though its been set alight with every small movement. Turning my head, I find Ant already staring at me, mouth curved upwards into a slight smile.

“I wish I never cooked it with you.”

Despite knowing that he is as high as a kite, his words still manage to catch me off guard. Forcing me to pull away, leaning back to take him in properly. From his somber expression to the deep intensity with which he looks at me, awaiting a reaction.

“Cops!” Before I can respond, shouts from the party grab my attention. Head spinning round to see the chaos unfolding, teenagers running in every direction, some scream, whilst others laugh. “Cops! The cops are coming!”

“Oh shit.”

Discarding the bottle I had been nursing, I hop to my feet within seconds, Ant, who now looks surprisingly sober, does the same. Without hesitation, he is grabbing my hand before we take off in a sprint, running in the opposite direction of the flashing lights and sirens that are rolling up to the gatho. As the crowds disperse, I find myself scanning through the seas of people, looking for a certain eshay that would get into a lot of trouble, should he be caught. “Where’s Cash?” Voice breathy, I force Ant and I to a halt, searching my entire field of vision for any sign of him, head spinning so fast that I’m shocked I didn’t give myself vertigo. “Ant, I can’t see him. Where’s Cash?”

“Y/N we need to go.”

With his free hand, Ant easily slides it around my waist, using all his strength to pry my feet from the pavement. Regardless of my unwillingness, I allow the boy to lead us away from the party. Not wanting to run the risk of getting caught, so instead I recite prayers in my head that Cash also hasn’t been caught.

Upon reaching the locked gate, Ant wastes no time in easily pushing me up so that I can scramble over the metal. He does so with ease, a proud display of his strength and it makes me blush. Reminiscing on the ways he used that strength before.

Running hand in hand down the noiseless streets of Sydney, I find myself giggling at tonight’s events. The prospect of an exciting, if slightly chaotic year eleven rises upon the horizon and I can’t help but display my enthusiasm at seeing where the next few months take me. (Hopefully, with Ant by my side, but nobody needs to know that.)

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mi4ura · 2 months ago

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Aot Modern AU headcanons (somewhat specific)

Erwin listens to classic old timey music. He likse to have them low during smexy time. And he's always asking questions on reddit, and definitely scrolls daily on FaceBook.

Levi has a whole cabinet and some of his pantry full of different tea flavors. You walk in every morning seeing him reading his book and sipping tea.

Connie is that one TikToker that makes skits about memes and goes viral all the time and has like 4.6M followers.

Sasha has a Mukbang channel on YouTube and posts, I kid you not, every day. And she has AT LEAST 2M subscribers.

Jean, Connie & Sasha have a YouTube channel also, and they're really. They get edited all the time and Jean noticed so he started posing, but Connie and Sasha make fun of for it.

Armin majors in psychology.

Eren is a streamer and gets clipped raging EVERY DAMN TIME. But his views are 19-12 year olds so they feed into it. He is always posting on Snapchat.

Ymir posted a SINGULAR thirst trap video, now she's basically viral for being fine. Connie, Sasha and Jean have her in their videos to get views like they're not already popular.

Historia likes to watch Sasha's mukbangs and usually never misses a video. She likes to cameo in Sasha, Jean and Connie's videos sometimes. But she has her own vlog channel.

Mikasa has accounts she doesn't post on but they have more than 1M followers. She also likes Artic Monkeys.

Hange posts random facts and YES, she has tons of followers.

Reiner took a depression test and lied about some the answers and was surprised he passed. He went around saying he had depression. He saved a lot of sad songs too to his favorites.

Annie's LOVES baggy clothes. People say she has a sleeper build when she works out, because she always covered up until she flexes.

Niccolo has a couple cooking channels. The captions are always so cute and usually about Sasha. "The food I make for my girlfriend while she's sick" "What I made for my girlfriend for dinner" "How I disguise medicine so my girlfriend eats it" "Baking a cake for my friend's party". He's also like a male Nara Smith, making shit from scratch.

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jeankirsteinsgrlfrnd · 1 year ago

Note

Hi! Thanks for your headcanons, I really love them! How do you think Attack on Titan characters sneeze? I once thought Levi must sneeze like a little kitten, and now I can't get that thought out of my head.

a/n: this is an odd request but thanks anyway. not to kinkshame lol but i hope this isn’t meant in a kinky way bc literally the other day i went down a whole rabbit hole when i learned that there is a whole community abt this

eren jaeger has a dramatic wind up to his sneeze. you can see it in his face like thirty seconds before he actually does it.

mikasa ackerman doesn’t sneeze. nobody’s ever seen her do it.

armin arlert sneezes into his elbow like the king he is. he’s not a super germaphobe but he takes his & others health serious.

connie springer totally free sneezes. it’s the type of sneeze that dads usually do. loud & startling & out of control.

jean kirstein does it pretty normally. also always uses his elbow.

sasha braus has long ones. like eren, she has a dramatic windup but the sneeze itself is pretty quiet. lot of build up for nothing.

ymir always holds hers in so they come out completely silent.

historia reiss sneezes like a kitten or like a grown man. there’s no in between.

erwin smith always says “excuse me” after he does. he is also a victim of the dad sneeze.

levi ackerman uses a handkerchief to catch it. it’s pretty quiet.

hange zoe always tries to fight them off and continues talking but you can tell how hard they’re trying to not do it. eyes watering the whole time.

annie leonhardt also has never been caught sneezing.

pieck finger is a kitten sneezer.

porco galliard literally says the word “achoo!” when he does it.

zeke jaeger is yet another victim of the dad sneeze. he also always does it three times in a row.

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levi501ackerman · 1 year ago

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She Looks Just Like a Dream | Levi x Reader Fluff

masterlist

Summary: One day the scouts find out Levi has a wife. Everyone wants to meet her.

Word Count: 1.7k

Megan's Note: Hello! I just finished Attack on Titan for the first time last Thursday April 11th, 2024. I haven't been obsessed with something in a while. Obsessed in the way of reading fanfics and making another tumblr account. I wrote this for fun because AOT reignited the inner teenage fangirl I used to be for One Direction. I hope you enjoy my first AOT fanfic. posted: 4/16/24. Song correlated: "Something About You" by Eyedress & Dent May

Sasha walked past the section commanders and Erwin standing and talking amongst themselves. She could not help but stare as she walked by because you were conversing with Captain Levi. It looked like you were . . . enjoying the conversation. There was Erwin talking to some recognizable leaders then you two off to the side fully facing each other. Sasha has never seen you before. You would giggle and your smile lit up your face. Levi had his arms crossed and his face looked softer. He would nod and indistinctively say something back to you which would just cause you to laugh and smile bigger. He wouldn’t take his eyes off of you. What a new version of Levi. Sasha looked for her table of friends. They needed to see Captain Levi acting like this.

Jean, Connie, Eren, Armin, and Mikasa were looking at Sasha already as if they were waiting to see the expression on Sasha. As she approached the table. She lowered her voice and pointed with her thumb, “You guys seeing this?”

“It’s the Captain’s wife,” Eren said.

“He has a wife!?” Sasha exclaimed louder.

“We were surprised too, everyone’s been trying to eavesdrop on them,” Connie said.

Sasha looked over her shoulder and the rest of the table couldn’t help but glance because how the hell did Levi pull you? And not only that what could you two be talking about? Captain Levi never mentioned being married or even hinted that he had someone at all. Battle plans could not make the pretty girl so giggly so what the hell were they talking about?

“What’s her name?” Sasha asked.

“No one knows,” Mikasa said softly. “Eren thinks she could be a Jenny or a Catherine.”

“Who knew he was married.”

“Possibly to keep her a secret. He would not want the wrong people to know about her.” Armin said.

“I want to meet her,” Eren stated and most of the table agreed. He blushed a little and hoped no one noticed. They all could not take their eyes off of you. “We’re the Levi Squad and we should know our Captain’s wife!”

“We could introduce ourselves as the Levi Squad too so it doesn’t come off as weird that we are all approaching her—them!” Connie added and he started standing up. The table still stayed in their seat. “Are we going?”

“I’m not,” Mikasa said.

“What if he makes us run laps?” Jean asked.

“Why would he make us run laps? Just don’t ask any weird questions and we’ll be fine.” Eren said standing up next.

“Let’s go,” Connie said and the table except for Mikasa stood up. They approached the section commanders who noticed the five of them going towards them. Levi gave them the side eye as they came closer. You turned from Levi, noticed the group, and offered them a smile.

“Good morning, Captain Levi.” Eren started and everyone greeted him with their eyes and then turned to you. Your clothes were cute and styled nicely. Levi noticed every single one of them scanning you head to toe. It was the third? or fourth? group to approach him while talking to you. “Hi we are Levi’s squad, you’re his wife?”

“Yes.” You said smiling at the staring eyes.

“Your shoes are really cute, miss!” Sasha added excitingly.

“This is my wife, Y/N,” Levi said in his low voice. “These scouts are some of the brats in my special operations squad.” You extended your hand to Connie first. He grasped your hand.

“Wow, you have the softest skin.” He said in awed and wide eyes. You furrowed your eyebrow and let out a soft giggle. Levi scolded him.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” You said as you shook each of their hand looking at all of them in the eyes.

“My name is Armin. You seem very nice as well.” Armin smiled.

“Thank you. Really though everyone is very polite here and is very kind.” You smiled and motioned with both hands to the room. Some soldiers Levi talked to maybe only once or twice would approach to talk to you. Some soldiers talked to you before ever even talking to the captain himself.

“We didn’t know Levi had a wife. How long have you two been together?” Sasha asked intensely.

“About . . . “ You looked to Levi and back at the group, “ten years? Coming up on eleven.” You said with warmth on your cheeks. They thought you were not like Levi at all. They thought you were enthusiastic when speaking to others and were like the sun. It did not seem like you would be into Levi at all. Your eyes looked down at Jean and he started blushing because he thought you were glancing at his crotch. “Your pocket watch is so pretty!” You admired the watch nearly falling out of his pocket. Jean yanked it out and thrusted the watch towards you.

“Y-You can have it.”

“Your grandmother gave that to you, Jean!” Connie said grabbing and pulling his wrist back. Eren laughed at Jeans’s blunt stupidity.

“I can get you a nice pocket watch next time I’m in the capital,” Levi said and you smiled.

“You’re so funny. Keep that your grandmother wanted you to have it.” You assured and Jean silently nodded. His only thought currently was you called him funny.

“We’d love to get to know you more Y/N! Are you in the military regiment at all?” Sasha asked, “Where do you live?”

“She’s not going to tell you where we live,” Levi furrowed his eyebrows and Eren burst out laughing. Sasha’s probably going to run laps.

“I can’t be that interesting to you!” You lightly swatted your hand and though it wasn’t a joke, the group couldn’t help but slightly smile. You were interesting to them. Soldiers wanted to talk to you just because of your beauty. “We opened a tea shop years ago and I collect vintage tea sets to sell. I also write books.” You smiled back and their faces lit up.

“You written books?” Connie asked.

“Yes.”

“Anything we might have read?” Eren asked enthusiastically.

“Do any of you actually read?” Levi asked. Let the record be known that the 104th Cadet Corps averaged the lowest academic grade. Most didn’t want to read the textbooks or take notes like they would have to in school.

“Hey be nice, your squad seems smart.” You wrapped an arm around Levi and everyone could not help but stare at the physical touch. You touched him and they never seen another woman touch their captain. “A few short stories for children have been published and distributed to the schools so they would not be interesting for adults to read.”

“You’ve done so much . . . how old are you?” Sasha asked and Armin’s eyes went big.

“Don’t you know it’s rude to ask that!” Levi cut in. She’s going to be running laps until sunset again.

“Y/N! I’m sorry I just mean you’re so accomplished and you’re so beautiful! Your hair is amazing. Levi, I can’t believe you kept her from us.” Sasha said. He rolled his eyes with a slightly softer face. You blushed.

“Thank you, you’re gorgeous as well.” Sasha was elated when you complimented her.

“You’re so beautiful . . .” She unknowingly repeated herself, “What made you drawn to Levi?”

“Sasha!” Connie and Eren pulled her back. Laps until the next morning.

“What?!” You smiled and wrapped your arm around Levi again, giving him a light shake and a squeeze. It was an odd site for the group to see. “Who wouldn’t be into this hilarious and kind gentleman? I feel like I have to fight for his attention sometimes whenever people come talk to us.” Truthfully most people approached you and Levi because of you. Guys would make up a stupid excuse to talk to Captain Levi with the intention of talking to you. Levi knew it too, but he couldn’t help that your energy makes people flock to you. He admired that you made friends where ever you went. Hated when guys would speak to you as if Levi wasn’t there. You blushed while looking at him and when Levi met your eyes his face got softer and he uncrossed his arms and nudged you. Levi looked away to hide his blushed cheeks. Who the fuck is she describing? the group thought. The Captain has never made a joke to them and they wondered what he does for you to call him a gentleman. “Levi! Are you being too hard on them?” You asked playfully and the five of them wanted to shout yes. Suddenly, a woman screaming your name excitedly from across the room could only be from one person.

“Hange! I was wondering when I would see you today!” You turned your attention to Hange running to embrace you in a big hug. You hugged and greeted Moblit with a warm hug afterward.

“Okay okay, you met Y/N run along,” Levi said. You instantly whipped back your attention to the group.

“Excuse me, it was very nice to meet you! Come over for dinner sometime so I can get to know you more! I can make my special braised short-rib beef.” Sasha was ready to duel Levi for you. Your white teeth sparkled to them and your smile radiated through the room. Connie, Sasha, and Jean enthusiastically agreed to your offer.

“If you keep inviting everyone to dinner how are we going to fit people into our house?” Levi asked you.

They walked away in awe of the captain’s wife. Something about you emits a glow in a dull room.

“She’s not like Levi at all . . .” Armin said and Mikasa turned her head to the group heading back to the table. She noticed all of them seemed to be in a good mood.

“He’s probably going to make you run laps for being pushy.” Jean joked to Sasha.

“What did you say, Sasha?” Mikasa asked

“She was just being stupid.” Jean intervened.

“Jean you offered her your grandmother’s pocket watch,” Connie said and Mikasa raised her eyebrows.

“I’d do it again.”

“What was she like? I could see her smiling a lot,” Mikasa said.

“She was positive and really supportive of Levi,” Eren said while reflecting on you. Everything you said was replaying in his head.

“She wrote children's books that are now in the schools,” Armin added.

“Damn it, I wanted to know the names of the books,” Eren said.

“Y/N seemed like someone that Levi needed in his life. She said he was a gentleman which I wasn’t expecting—” Connie started.

“Well, he would treat her the best rather than anyone else,” Jean said. They turned to get another look at you but a few soldiers were blocking their view. Another round of people who wanted to meet you.

masterlist

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hanjisungslag · 5 months ago

Text

attack on titan headcanons #15

synopsis: things you argue about 😵‍💫

characters included: eren, mikasa, armin, jean, sasha, connie, reiner, annie, bertolt, levi, erwin and hange.

notes: i’ll be expanding my horizons!! & adding a new anime to my masterlist >.< also, i added a s4 ver to this? i’m not sure if it’s any good but, i just wanted to do it loll

☆ eren jaeger

pointing out the obvious here but, his yearning to kill every single titan. he constantly puts himself in danger, especially since becoming a titan himself and he is just completely blinded by his rage sometimes. you’ve all lost someone to the titans whether it’s your parents, friends or an acquaintance, there’s no need for him to be so reckless!

by the time you guys are 19, he had left. he became awfully reserved and angrier but in a scarier way, he was quieter. he was clearly severely traumatised & that caused many arguments for a multitude of reasons but before you knew it, he left without a word.

☆ mikasa ackerman

her recklessness. she’s very head strong, leaning toward a bit stubborn but most of all, she was caring of those around her. as a rookie, she may have been compared to a 100 man army but, that doesn’t mean she’s indestructible!

by the time you’re 19, a lot has gone to shit. so many people have died, eren is on a genocide mission & everyone is terrified. at any moment, either of you could die. you used to see her as reckless now, you see her as fearless and what’s the harm in trying to save the world?

☆ armin arlert

probably his lack of survival instincts. or his insecurity because yes, he’s witty AND he does have some survival skills in a intellectual sense but sometimes, he does lack it and it’s scary. his insecurity not only has an affect on him but you too. it’s really difficult to deal with and it can be draining. his insecurity links back into his survival skills too, he’s so convinced he’s a weakling that he freezes, he doesn’t try to fight. you just want him to stand on his own two feet confidently.

by the time you’re 19, you don’t argue about much. he’s grown up so much, become so much more confident & everyone knows he gets closer to becoming commander everyday.

☆ jean kirsten

i’m sorry but this man is perfect 😭. I SAID IT, I SAID IT!! when he was younger, he acted like a bit of a arrogant. sort of acted like a big, strong man but he’s not and he knows damn well he ain’t! he’s a team worker, kind, understanding and most of all strong and intelligent! he’s the full package idc idc.

by the time you’re 19… you’re still the same. you’re in a more dire situation but, jean doesn’t change. he’s still the heartfelt, strong, confident boy you met 4 years prior except he has a mullet now (😜).

☆ sasha braus

dare i say pretty much nothing…? like you guys probably barely even bicker. you’re both fairly happy, good people who are strong and can handle yourself! maybe the odd bicker about how she steals your stuff.

by the time you’re 19… gulp.

☆ connie springer

he’s very set on stuff… he’s very blinded by his own opinions and doesn’t see the bigger picture. it’s frustrating trying to explain minute details to him or asking him to see things from others perspectives etc. all because he’s so opinionated!

by the time you’re 19, after all the tragedy and heart break, he’s a lot more of an open book now. although one thing you do bicker about is him cracking jokes at the wrong time. still a major issue to this day i fear.

☆ reiner braun

aha😅 probably the fact he’s a TITAN… yeah, i’d say that was a pretty big turning point in your relationship especially because he just blurted it out?? like one minute you’re setting up cannons and the next, eren is screaming about how your boyfriend and his best friend are the fucking titans??? like?? traumatic much? before that, you didn’t argue about much. only when he put himself in danger for others because yes, it’s admirable but it’s dangerous and stupid. you don’t wanna see him hurt!

by the time you’re 19… well. you broke up. not officially just due to uh, circumstances. awks.

☆ annie leonhart

i don’t think there was necessarily anything major that you guys argued about, definitely just like little bickers about stupid things and annie would usually just close off until you both forget about it or apologised to get it over with. after the discovery of her being a titan and the killing of marco, you were absolutely heartbroken.

by the time you’re 19, you had also broken up unofficially.

☆ bertolt hoover

nothing! i’m sorry he’s just too wonderful and perfect! that was until the inevitable happened, reiner exposed the two of them on a random tuesday. overhearing this conversation, you thought reiner was delusional, bertolt tried his best to get reiner to just shut up & stop talking but next thing you knew you were forced to fight your own boyfriend. you were furious, betrayed, hurt. you tried your best to let out your feelings of anguish while fighting him but, soon he disappeared.

by the time you’re 19… uhhh

☆ levi ackerman

oh dear god um, probably the fact he’s so closed off. it was difficult for him to even get into a relationship with you in the first place but then, he doesn’t allow himself to be open with you. he’s so traumatised and terrified in losing you that he sees no point in opening up. it’s really difficult because he doesn’t really realise he’s doing it but whenever you try to bring it up, he gets defensive.

☆ erwin smith

his need for the ‘secret’. it drives you up the wall, it’s understandable yes, but it’s insane. he’s so devoted and you love that but sometimes, it’s overwhelming and a little scary. you argue about this every once in a while but especially toward the end, when they were so close to erens basement, you wanted to spend the rest of our lives together but erwin was willing to put himself and all his troops on the line for this, you thought it was selfish.

☆ hange zoë

nothing. sorry but just nothing, maybe their experiments with titans because like what the fuck that’s so dangerous? but usually, you know you can count on moblit to make sure they don’t die aha… even when they do get a bit too close to comfort to the titans it’s less of an argument and more of a “hange— jesus, can you please be careful?” while they giggle happily 😭.

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debussy42 · 4 months ago

Text

radiohead

(a/n) life has been like radio static lately. I've been trying to tune into anything and everything, but all I get back is that crackling. It's been getting a lot more prominent lately, but here's to anyone feeling the same as me. It sucks.

The barracks are quiet tonight. A rare thing. The usual rustle of shifting blankets, the occasional murmur of half-spoken dreams, all swallowed by the steady hum of rain tapping against the windows. You should be asleep, but your mind won’t let you. The static’s too loud. A constant, grating buzz in the back of your skull, restless thoughts tangling together like frayed wires.

You exhale, staring up at the wooden beams above you. Sleep isn’t coming. It won’t. Not tonight.

You slip out of bed, careful not to wake the others, and step into the dimly lit hallway. It’s cold—enough to bite at your skin, but at least it’s real. Something tangible against the numbness pressing in.

Your feet lead you without thought. Past doors lined with soldiers sleeping soundly, past the faint glow of lanterns left burning low. And then, before you even register why, you’re standing outside Levi’s office.

The door isn’t locked. It never is. You hesitate, hand hovering over the handle, but before you can make a decision, his voice cuts through the silence.

“Took you long enough.”

He doesn’t sound surprised. Just tired. Maybe even expecting you.

You push the door open. He’s at his desk, pen resting between his fingers, an untouched cup of tea at his side. His eyes flick up, scanning you briefly before he exhales through his nose. “You look like hell.”

You huff a quiet laugh, stepping inside. “I feel like it.”

He gestures—wordless, a slight tilt of his head toward the chair across from him. You take it, letting the silence stretch between you.

For a while, neither of you speak. The only sound is the rain, steady against the glass, and the occasional scratch of Levi’s pen against paper. But somehow, the static in your head starts to dull. Not gone, not entirely, but quieter. Manageable.

Levi sets his pen down. “You want tea or not?”

You blink at him. He’s already reaching for a second cup, like he knew you’d be here before you even did. Like it was never really a question.

You swallow past the tightness in your throat and nod. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

He doesn’t say anything. He just pours, sliding the cup across the desk to you, before settling back into his chair.

The tea is warm against your palms. Not scalding—Levi never lets it get that hot—but warm enough to cut through the chill that’s settled in your bones. You curl your fingers around the cup, holding it like it might anchor you, like the heat alone can remind you that you’re still here, still breathing.

Levi watches you for a moment before taking a sip of his own. The room smells of black tea, faintly earthy and grounding. He doesn’t ask why you’re here. He never does.

The silence stretches, but it isn’t empty. It isn’t the gnawing, restless kind that fills your head with static. It’s solid. Weighted. Levi’s presence does that—he turns silence into something tangible, something real, rather than something that swallows you whole.

You wrap your hands tighter around the cup, staring down at the dark surface. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” you say, the words slipping out before you can stop them. Your voice is quieter than you expect.

Levi doesn’t look up from his tea. “Nothing’s wrong with you.”

You huff, shaking your head. “I feel like I should be… functioning. Like everyone else is managing just fine, and I’m just—” You gesture vaguely, searching for the words, but all you come up with is, “—static.”

Levi doesn’t speak right away. He just watches you, gaze steady, unreadable in that way of his. And then, slowly, he sets his cup down.

“You ever seen a broken radio?” he asks.

You blink at him. “What?”

“A radio,” he repeats. “When it’s busted, all you get is static. Doesn’t mean it’s useless. Just means something’s rattled loose inside.”

You stare at him. You don’t know what you expected him to say, but it wasn’t that.

Levi shrugs, leaning back in his chair. “Shit happens. You get rattled. Doesn’t mean you’re broken.”

Something tight lodges itself in your chest. You swallow against it. “So what? I just wait for it to stop?”

Levi exhales through his nose. “No. You fix it.” His eyes flick to you. “Bit by bit.”

You don’t have a response to that. Not right away.

You take a slow sip of tea instead, letting the warmth seep into you, letting the words settle into the cracks you hadn’t realized were there. Bit by bit.

Levi shifts, reaching for his pen again. “Go to bed when you’re done,” he mutters, already turning his attention back to his paperwork. “And don’t make a habit of showing up here at night. I’ll start charging you for the tea.”

The corner of your mouth twitches.

“Yeah, yeah,” you murmur. But for the first time in days, the static isn’t so loud.

The morning comes slow, hesitant, the sky outside still dusted in a gray haze. You’re not sure if you actually slept after leaving Levi’s office, but something feels different. Not fixed, not entirely, but steadier.

You step outside the barracks and nearly run straight into Sasha.

“There you are,” she huffs, shoving a piece of bread into her mouth as she speaks. “We were wondering if you got lost or something.”

“We?” you ask, but before she can answer, a voice calls from across the training grounds.

“Finally!” Connie waves, jogging over, Jean trailing behind him with an exasperated look. “Took you long enough.”

“You look like shit,” Jean observes, but there’s no real bite to it. Just the kind of dry concern that comes from familiarity. “You sleep at all?”

You don’t know how to answer that.

Before you can figure it out, Sasha nudges you with her elbow, a grin already forming. “Well, if you’re tired, that’s too bad, because we’re going into town.”

You blink. “What?”

Armin walks up then, Mikasa just behind him, her expression unreadable as ever. “We have the day off,” he explains. “And we figured you could use a break.”

You hesitate. That same weight lingers, that same hum of noise just beneath your skin. You don’t know if you’re ready to face the world outside these walls today.

But then Sasha grabs your wrist, tugging you forward. “C’mon,” she says, grin widening. “If we let Jean pick the food, we’re all doomed.”

“Hey,” Jean protests, but Connie’s already laughing.

You glance at Armin. He gives you a small, knowing smile. “It’ll be good for you,” he says quietly.

You exhale. The static is still there. Still humming. But then Sasha’s grip tightens, and Jean starts arguing with Connie over something ridiculous, and Mikasa gives you a small nod, like she understands in a way she won’t say aloud.

The town is already alive by the time you step past the gates. Merchants call out from wooden stalls, voices weaving into the hum of morning chatter. The scent of fresh bread lingers in the air, mixing with something sharper—wood smoke, damp stone, the faint brine of the river cutting through the district. The streets are slick from last night’s rain, puddles pooling in the uneven cobblestone.

It’s almost too much at first. The static in your head presses harder, like a radio dial cranked just beyond the right station, the noise overlapping, unfiltered. But then Sasha pulls you forward, her grip firm and real, and the sound starts to separate, to break apart into voices and laughter and the occasional huff of an impatient cart driver trying to squeeze through the crowd.

“Alright, mission plan,” Connie announces, stretching his arms above his head as you make your way deeper into the market. “Step one: find food. Step two: eat said food. Step three: do absolutely nothing productive for the rest of the day.”

Jean rolls his eyes. “You realize none of us are obligated to follow your plan, right?”

“You say that,” Sasha chimes in, already scanning the market stalls, “but I’ve never seen you turn down a meal.”

Jean opens his mouth—probably to argue—but then Sasha spots something and takes off at a speed that suggests imminent disaster.

“Sasha, wait—”

Armin sighs as she vanishes into the crowd. “And there she goes.”

Mikasa, ever steady, watches Sasha’s retreating figure before glancing at you. “Come on,” she says, voice quiet enough that only you hear. “Before she eats everything in sight.”

Something about the way she says it makes your chest feel less tight. Not teasing, not pitying. Just… grounding.

You nod, following as the rest of them fall in step beside you.

The day passes in pieces.

Sasha somehow convinces a vendor to give her three meat skewers for the price of one, grinning as she takes a victorious bite. Jean gets dragged into a debate with Connie over which bakery has the best pastries, a debate that ends with both of them buying an absurd amount of bread just to prove a point.

Mikasa barely reacts when Armin—smiling, mischievous—tries to convince her to split a honeyed apple tart with him. She simply holds out her hand, unimpressed but accepting, and takes a small, careful bite.

And you—

You don’t know when it happens, but at some point, the static fades into the background.

You don’t feel light, not entirely. The weight is still there, the hum of exhaustion still curled at the edges of your thoughts. But for the first time in a long time, you feel present. Here.

A breeze rolls in, carrying the scent of baking bread and something faintly floral. The sky has cleared, clouds peeling away to reveal a stretch of blue so wide it almost aches to look at. You take a slow breath.

Jean nudges you with his elbow. “You good?”

You glance at him. The words are casual, almost careless, but there’s something steady in the way he looks at you. Something unspoken.

You exhale. Nod. “Yeah.”

He doesn’t push. Just nods back and turns to scold Connie for stuffing an entire roll into his mouth at once.

You watch them—watch Armin laughing, watch Mikasa shake her head at Sasha, watch the way the sun catches on the curve of the rooftops, on the cobblestone streets, on the faces of the people moving past, alive, breathing, here— and you think, maybe...

The sun hangs lower in the sky by the time you all make your way back toward the garrison. The air has shifted, cooler now, tinged with the scent of the approaching evening. The laughter from earlier still lingers, woven into the rhythm of your steps, into the warmth resting in your chest.

But just as you near the main gates, you hear a familiar voice—sharp, unmistakable.

“Ah-ha! Just the group of troublemakers I was looking for!”

Hange.

You barely have time to register the exclamation before they bound toward you, half out of breath, their coat billowing behind them. Erwin follows at a slower, measured pace, arms crossed, an amused but expectant expression already settling on his face. And behind them—

You catch a glimpse of Levi, standing just a bit apart, watching.

Hange skids to a stop in front of you all, hands on their hips, eyes alight with something you already know is going to lead to trouble. “I need volunteers.”

Jean groans. “Oh, hell no—”

“You haven’t even heard what it is yet!” Hange cuts him off, clapping a hand on his shoulder before turning to the rest of you. “C’mon, just a little experiment. Nothing dangerous. Probably.”

Armin raises an eyebrow. “That doesn’t sound reassuring.”

Hange waves him off. “Details, details.” Then their eyes land on you, and their grin widens. “Y/N! You’ll help me, right?”

You open your mouth, but before you can answer, Levi speaks.

“She’s not getting roped into your bullshit today, four-eyes.”

Hange pouts dramatically. “Oh, so you get to decide now?”

Levi gives them a look, unimpressed. “I’m stopping you from dragging someone who’s already dead on their feet into one of your disasters. You’re welcome.”

Something in your stomach twists at that. He noticed.

Erwin steps forward then, shaking his head, the picture of patience. “Hange,” he says, voice calm, even. “Perhaps another time.”

Hange sighs. “Fine, fine. But don’t think I’m giving up!”

Levi rolls his eyes. “Tragic.”

Hange finally relents, and as the conversation shifts, you feel a presence beside you. Levi. Close enough that you catch the faint scent of tea and something clean, sharp.

“You’re still standing,” he mutters. “That’s an improvement.”

It’s not a question. Just an observation.

You glance at him, at the way his arms are crossed, at the way his eyes flick over you, taking in everything without making it obvious.

You swallow. “Yeah. I think I am.”

He doesn’t say anything. But after a beat, he exhales quietly. It's enough. You don’t need to say more.

The conversation moves around you, voices rising and falling like the ebb and flow of the tide. But Levi stays where he is—close, steady, his presence grounding in a way you hadn’t realized you needed.

You shift slightly, just enough that your arm brushes his. It’s a small thing, barely noticeable, but Levi’s sharp eyes flick to you, catching the movement. He doesn’t pull away.

For a while, the group lingers outside the garrison, unwilling to let the evening end just yet. The orange glow of the setting sun streaks the sky, casting long shadows across the stone walls. Jean and Connie continue their back-and-forth, with Sasha inserting the occasional remark, always on the verge of laughter. Armin is deep in discussion with Erwin, his eyes bright with curiosity.

And Hange—Hange is still trying to recruit someone for their so-called harmless experiment.

“Come on, Levi,” they wheedle, nudging his shoulder. “You’re my last hope.”

Levi gives them an unimpressed look. “Not a fucking chance.”

Hange groans dramatically. “You’re no fun.”

“Good.”

You catch the flicker of a smirk at the corner of Levi’s mouth before he turns his gaze forward again.

At some point, Erwin claps his hands together, drawing everyone’s attention. “It’s getting late,” he says, the weight of command slipping back into his voice. “We should all head in.”

A collective groan of protest ripples through the group, but Erwin’s word is final.

Sasha stretches, her arms reaching toward the sky. “Fine, fine. But next time, I’m picking the plan.”

“God help us all,” Jean mutters.

One by one, the others start making their way inside. But before you can follow, Levi speaks beside you, low enough that only you hear.

“Walk with me.”

It’s not quite a request, not quite an order.

You hesitate, but only for a moment. Then you nod.

Levi doesn’t say anything more—just starts walking, and you fall into step beside him.

The quiet between you is different from the static that’s plagued you for weeks. This silence isn’t heavy, isn’t suffocating. It just… is.

Eventually, he stops near the edge of the barracks, leaning against the cool stone wall. The last of the sunlight casts a golden glow over his sharp features, softening them in a way that feels almost unreal.

He watches you for a moment, then exhales. “You look better than you did this morning.”

You let out a soft breath, something between a laugh and a sigh. “That’s a low bar.”

Levi doesn’t argue. He just studies you, gaze steady, as if he’s trying to gauge how much of your weight has lifted, how much still lingers.

After a beat, he speaks again, voice quieter this time. “I know what it’s like. When everything feels too fucking loud.”

You blink, caught off guard by his honesty.

He doesn’t elaborate, doesn’t turn it into a lesson or a speech. He just says it, like a fact. Like a truth meant only for you to hear.

Your throat tightens. You shift your gaze to the horizon, where the last traces of light are fading into dusk. “It’s been bad lately.”

Levi doesn’t push, doesn’t ask for details. He just nods. “Yeah.”

Silence stretches between you again, but it’s not empty. It’s something else. Something solid.

Then, after a moment, Levi moves. Reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small, familiar bundle.

Tea.

Your chest tightens.

“You should drink something before you turn in,” he mutters, almost gruffly, as he presses it into your hand. “Might help.”

You stare at it for a long moment before curling your fingers around it.

He doesn’t say anything else, doesn’t wait for a thank you. He just straightens, gives you one last, searching look, then turns on his heel and walks off toward his own quarters.

You stand there, fingers still curled around the bundle of tea, and for the first time in weeks—

The static is quiet.

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