#saw parallels between these scenes and it made me feel ill

[jetsetlariat]

Tell me what happened // Tell me what you told the police

[medicallymercury]

I haven’t watched the full episode yet (I know what happened generally) because me and my mum watch it when my dad is at work and he isn’t tonight, but I have watched Teddy and Jan’s scenes, sooooo…

Teddy is, or least was, just a kid with a toy ambulance. And I mean that ‘was’ both literally when he was a kid, and in the very recent series 36 naivety-about-the-job sense. Which has survived a little bit up until this point but I think this episode might’ve killed it off. I actually like the idea of Teddy becoming very disillusioned with the job and still never leaving it. I don’t know if I’ve expressed this in a post before but Teddy has to be a paramedic - it’s the only thing he wants to do, it’s the thing he’s best at, it’s required to keep the tragedy of that family going - but it’s not really good for him. To give the writers far too much credit, he’s the heir to the throne in a Shakespearean tragedy, it’ll kill him and he has no choice but to keep going after it. Anyway, this a great episode for my Teddy Has To Be A Paramedic thoughts. All the horrible things that happened, the fact that he's clearly shaken up, and he's still trying to keep working. That is a kid with a toy ambulance standing too close to the road if I ever saw one.

Sometimes the spoilers focus on something largely irrelevant to what is actually happening in the episode, huh? I don’t really know what to say about Len beyond 'that’s gonna fuck Teddy up'. That’s horrifying. I am really looking forward to seeing how Teddy is doing in next week's episode cause that was……….......… There’s also kinda parallels between Jan (reasonably) telling Teddy he can’t stay with Len and Jan (justifiably) not telling Teddy about Gethin going to Switzerland if you're looking for them. Edit: they also highlighted (…I don’t like to assume the writers intended to anything they did well recently) the fact that Teddy and Jan have both been really alone for a long time, since before Gethin died they’ve only really had each other because Teddy stopped actually trusting Paige and Sah around the time that Jan and Ffion re-broke-up and since Gethin died they haven’t had each other, with that part where Len asks if he and Teddy can get a dog because Jan asked Ffion the same thing when they were planning their retirement-that-wasn’t.

Also, that’s another Jan and Teddy episode with a drugs based plot point (alongside literally everything they were called to in Is The Patient Breathing? and Kezzie, AJ and their mum in Break Your Heart). Probably unintentionally, Ross looms.

The scene where Teddy wants to go back to the explosion and Jan stops him is FUCKING GREAT. Another thing I think about a lot are the ways that their personal relationship inevitably bleeds into the professional. Jan as Teddy’s boss and Jan as Teddy’s aunt. That scene, first of all, has Teddy’s tendency to pretend he’s fine and deny that he needs help or to step back from work. An overlooked trait of his, if you’re asking me, but one that has been there a long time (and that we've also seen Jan sometimes has as well). Also, there is a clear moment where Jan switches from talking to Teddy as his boss to talking as his aunt and I love it. It’s from “I know how hard it is when…" to “I know how hard it is.” when her tone changes entirely and he turns to look at her after looking away. I appreciate that singular moment so much.

Generally? Di Botcher and Milo Clarke, you've done it again (made me feel physically ill about pretend paramedics).

Next week’s spoilers about them: how many times can I say that it’s not the storyline I dreamed of after Gethin, but that I am very excited for their stuff next week anyway? (Especially because “he’s got nobody to talk to about work” makes me foolishly hopeful for a Sah mention.)

I'm gonna go listen to Class of 2013 and Fireworks by Mitski and think things about Teddy until it's next Saturday.

[scribble-dribble-writes]

If you dont mind me asking

I think I may have missed it but why do you think Namora works for her personal gain?

I thought Namora told Namor to attack Wakanda because she cared about the Talocans too. She acted on impulse . She was angry that they killed the two Talocans.

Both Namor and Namora thought about their people and their protection which I don't think is wrong? After all they are in war?

Or maybe I have missed something( I watched the movie only once so its quite possible) I liked all of you analysis, so I thought maybe you can explain it a bit better?

Sorry if I offended you in any way

I'm not offended at all!! Please ask me questions haha I love analysing scenes. The whole topic on Namora stems from how she was just presented to me when I saw the film.

Namor and Namora are cousins according to the comics and they do have that ease of conversation in the movie. The first scene we see her is when they sink the ship in the Atlantic, and then see looks up at the sky when the helicopter takes off. Between Attuma and her, I feel like she's the right hand or more closer individual to Namor. Attuma is the muscle brains (as Okoye says 😂).

The next scene we see her is on the bridge, and the impression I get from her is that she's just ruthless. She's on her task and precise too, she immediately takes on the task of killing the witnesses. This contrast is interesting because when Attuma fights Okoye, she drops her spear and could have eliminated her then and there but instead he kicks it back to her. I derive from that scene, that the Talokans in a way are bound by honour. They do not kill unless required or their opponent has to have the weapon or should have been defeated in battle. When Shuri asks to be taken, Attuma asks for council from Namora again hinting at their power play? She says yes and takes her. From those scenes alone I felt like she had a scheming personality. It's these little connections in the way she holds herself that I found interesting to deconstruct her character further. She definitely feels like someone who works based on a motive.

Then in the cave sequence, she's rather suspicious of Shuri. And that's fair because she's the princess of Wakanda, but Namora keeps a close eye on her interactions with Namor. In his little hut when they were speaking, I'm 100% sure she was posted outside his door and could have been privy to their conversation. From what I've seen from Namor so far, he's a regal ruler. He has one motive, it is to keep his people safe, whatever the cause. His downside is that he's impulsive, but given the fact that he wants to keep their existence a secret from the whole world, he doesn't have much to work with.

The other interesting parallel in his character is when Nakiya talks to the indigenious woman and she says that those with ill will in their hearts do not return from meeting Namor. So I like that he has a great discernment of character and maybe that's why he's taken by Shuri. She's noble and because of a shared trauma, wants vengence to some degree. But he makes demands and likes for them to be met, he's getting frustrated with the nosy surface beings sniffing around his home. Now the whole point of the war tips on one factor. One life to keep the peace , and in enter Riri Williams.

I love the shot of the final moment in the cave. Shuri listens to him and I feel like shes the first person to do so. He entrusts with her his fear and his ambition, his heart is tainted with hatred for the colonisers but I'm sure his interaction with Shuri would have made him pause to reflect on his idea of "all surface people are bad", he depicts or portrays mild mannerisms where he looks like he could be open to change. He admires wakanda but I'm sure he wouldn't have wanted to invade cause that would go against his core ideal of losing a home. He only wants to be sure of security and an ally in destroying his enemy and now wakanda's enemy, the United States so far. Shuri and him are engrossed in conversation, he gives her his mother's bracelet almost like a peace offering before the conversation tips but even then I feel like they were arguing in the most royal sense. The conversation was not about them or their needs but about their people. Now in between this, Namora pops up. She sees this dynamic and having been close to Namor she can tell he would have been enamoured with Shuri, so this could have been working in her head.

Now all this goes on and then Nakiya tips the tension by killing two Talokans, whom Shuri tries to save to prevent war but also because by this time she actually has compassion and empathy for the Talokans. Just before Nakiya enters, you can see her interact with the Talokan lady. With Namor distracted, he would have come back to a scene and it's enraging him. He hold the lady as she passes and the last thing she asks is if he can save her. But in this scene, I feel like he's absolutely pissed off with Ramonda. She threatens him just a second ago and then this happens, so he's starting to see red. In that moment, if the council he received at that moment was like, we need to take time to react I believe he would have waited it out to attack wakanda but instead (OMG THAT SHOT IS BEAUTIFUL) We see the camera focused on his face, you as a viewer already know what's running in his mind, but that's when Namora steps in. She knows him well enough to echo his thoughts in such a way that it will tip him off. She also constructs that conversation around Shuri, about how she could be this vile person who could leak their secret. She's basically accusing him of having a soft spot for her and now she's a witness who should have been eliminated.

This wreaks havoc, she infiltrates the river city along with the army and then if I'm not wrong points him the direction he needed to go. To do the deed, I'm not saying Namor is a mindless fool but the guy is basically in rage mode. He will at all costs not have his people be revealed, so he goes after Ramonda. Now I do believe, if Shuri was in the room with her mother and Riri, Ramonda would not have died, she would have been spared and this attack would have been a warning. But he then sees Shuri crumble, his rage fades and it sort of strikes him as he sees Ramonda lifeless. This guy has a strong connection to mothers so having him be the cause of Ramonda's demise did not really sit right. So when he's about to leave he instructs Shuri or advices her to let go and move on but importantly says that's she's queen now. I feel like he wanted her to be queen because she knew his secret and now she could do better than Ramonda. It's messy, brutal and complex.

We don't get much of Namora in the fight sequence but I get the vibe that when Namor and Shuri fight, she was hoping for Namor to kill her this time around. But instead they become allies on the battlefield and that outcome is not what she's looking for. So Namor goes back home and is healing and commemorating this pivotal moment of Wakandan and Talokan history when we get the final scene. She walks in telling him that what he did was wrong, that she was wanting to fight beside him, that the very thought of him kneeling down to Shuri is not setting well with her. But Namor looks at peace for once just like he had been when he was with Shuri, his people our safe, what he wanted to happen has happened, he's now allies with Wakanda. But Namora comes across as impatient that she wanted to burn the world more than him. That dialogue of hers made me feel she harboured even more hatred than Namor. He convinces her like a child saying she'll get the war she wants. She also operates with a power dynamic, so in her head she might feel she's the closest to Namor, having Shuri there will seem threatening to her. But Namor plays into that unknowingly, he's fangirling about the Black panther while I'm pretty sure she's not getting his attachment for her.

Anyway, I have once again rambled 😂 she may not even be the villain and neither is Namor but she seems fishy (pun intended) to me. She's a chaos child and everyone's pointing fingers at Namor, I want to say that he didn't act alone. But this was how I interpreted their relationship and dynamic.

I believe the true enemy to Wakanda and Talokan is the actually the world and that depends on if these guys are going to leave well enough alone and stop digging for vibranium. But you know colonisers are always on the look out for new places and resources to conquer, so the world is going to dig and it will strike up a war with Wakanda.

[positivelybeastly]

X-Men #4

On time for once!

Let's do this.

Hmm. Not quite sure how I feel about this? Admittedly, Illyana is a character about whom I know relatively little in the grand scheme of things, but given that she's been fighting for control of Limbo for a while, been a protege of Scott Summers, and was a War Captain on Krakoa, I would think her tactical skills would be up to snuff enough that she could be half decent at chess?

That being said, the trope that tactical ability can be measured by chess ability isn't one that I think has to be followed. It's as much a test of logic as it is of tactical planning and forethought, and between Illyana's more chaotic nature and her lack of formal schooling, maybe it's just the case that she would rather show you how good she is in the field than go on about chess ability. And I can think of a good reason why she would choose to play chess with the person she has blocked, rather than any other game.

Anyway!

Trevor Fitzroy isn't allowed his weird little gremlin bro-pal possible love interest guy Bantam anymore, because of woke. (I know fuckin' nothing about Fitzroy, incidentally, this is based off of their weird relationship in that one X-Men: TAS episode I watched.)

And yeah, what WAS Krakoa all about, huh? Where DID all those babies that got abandoned go?

. . . Well, anyway!

Hank, chairs are for sitting on, not perching on . . .

It's interesting that we're doing split team issues - clearly, this run is taking cues from New X-Men not just in terms of some of its plot points, but also some of its structure; there were multiple arcs that focused exclusively on Charles and Jean, or Logan, Scott and Fantomex, with the rest of the team in the ether. It's not a bad way to tackle a team of this size, and given the news that both Magik and Psylocke are getting ongoing solo series, I'm less worried about them getting focus in a team book now.

Where is the Marauder, incidentally? I can't imagine you need that for a psychic rescue? Unless Max is using it, I suppose. Something that'll come up in #5, I imagine.

It's a sign of just how poisoned the discourse about Hank McCoy is that I saw multiple comments on Reddit saying that this scene heralded a return to evil Beast, because he also didn't like to go out on field missions and would regard his work as more important.

That being said, this reaction was weird to me, given that this Hank comes from an era where he was at his most pro-active, heroic, and willing to fight for people he didn't know - until I read the Infinity Comics, which made it all make a good degree more sense.

Hank isn't being cowardly or showing a case of poor priorities; no, instead, he appears not to trust himself, and he'd rather not place what he perceives to be a volatile, potentially morally untrustworthy element (himself) into a live situation. Working on Magneto's illness is a cut and dry net good with no downsides, so it makes sense he'd want to keep working on that, especially if Hank has reason to believe a similar condition could affect any one of them at any time.

Not sure I love Illyana's antagonism towards Rogue here? Feels kinda like it came out of nowhere and is just being done to foreshadow the upcoming 4 part crossover where these two teams come to a head. Scott's frustration with Rogue's attack on Graymalkin in #3 felt a bit more naturalistic than this.

Idie icesliding like that really does make me wonder if MacKay also wanted Iceman for this team but he was earmarked for Eve Ewing's Exceptional book. I doubt it, just because MacKay's done some really good, pointed work with Idie, which continues in this issue, but the visual parallel is just hard to get out of my brain.

I missed this Hank, a lot.

Also, good time to note that we do have a different artist here! Netho Diaz's style isn't a million miles away from Ryan Stegman's, so it's not a very jarring shift, and I do like how Diaz renders a lot of these characters - less heavily stylised, but heavily styilised isn't always to everyone's taste, so I feel like this was a good pick of fill-in artist.

Man. Have I mentioned I missed this Hank, a LOT? That happy little smile on his face in the bottom right panel really does delight me.

Still not quite the bouncing effervescence of Defenders Hank, but this is still very solidly 90s Hank, who I do rather enjoy, especially when he's in the hands of a writer who knows when to really let his loquacious qualities out to play, and when to let brevity be the soul of wit.

Idie's really come a long way since Wolverine & the X-Men, and I'm really, honestly, very happy to see it. She's coming from a place of real experience and wisdom and the struggle of loving yourself in what can feel like a loveless world, and I hope MacKay continues to showcase her maturation and development. Considering how worried I was that she'd be wallpaper in this series, this is encouraging stuff.

If you had asked me which member of this team of X-Men I expected to give what amounts to a really popping Batman speech, I would not have picked Cain Marko, but this feels real and earned in light of his genuine Krakoan redemption. The elevation from avatar of destruction to protector, to bodyguard, to living target, is fucking awesome.

Yeah, work that pole, Hank.

That being said, this dialogue does still sound kinda weird for Hank. This feels a little more like X-Force Beast than anything else, so I'm wondering if this is a seed of something, or if Hank is just kinda frustrated that what feels like a side quest popped up just as he was about to progress the main quest and enter act 2. God knows that if I woke up in the morning and found out I had to tangle with Trevor Fitzroy and the Upstarts, I would also be a little annoyed - this feels a little bottom of the barrel for the X-Men.

The X-Men fandom at large just heaved a great sigh and said, in unison, "Oh, this fucker."

Not the AoA geneticist I would have wanted to see in this book, but I'll take it, I suppose. Hopefully we get an explanation about where this guy came from, because I was fairly certain he was dead? Not that that's ever stopped anyone before, but just, you know, so we can put it on the Wiki and all.

Laksa! Apparently a spicy noodle dish, usually made with thick rice noodles, with toppings such as chicken, straw, or fish - that being said, given we were told that Glob is a vegetarian and that he therefore only cooks vegetarian, I have to imagine this might be a coconut soup laksa that might include eggs, deep-fried tofu, beansprouts, and herbs, or some variation thereof.

Hank definitely seems to approve. :)

God, please tell me that Colossus is going to join the team, I would absolutely love for Jed MacKay to get to work on our beefy Russian lad, he deserves some TLC after the trauma conga line that was Krakoa and the years before that.

Interesting that he's a blocked number and yet they're still interacting, but then again, I have a browser extension that blocks Reddit on my computer, and I still go on Reddit, so maybe that rings truer than I'd like to admit.

This leads me to my guess as to the reason of why chess - it's playable long distance, and doesn't require any elaboration on moves. You just say the piece and where you're moving them to. Something easy to play with someone who doesn't feel communicative. A way of talking without really talking.

All in all, a decent issue, but it definitely feels more in line with #2 than #1 or #3 - I almost have to wonder if the edict to double ship issues came down, and MacKay felt more able to decompress things and spread them out across multiple issues as a result, especially since I think that, if this were paced more tightly, we'd be progressing through the plot fairly quickly.

If we're taking New X-Men as the blueprint, Morrison would absolutely have squished the last four issues into two - but they weren't double shipping, so.

If we're looking at odd numbers being the plot heavy, characterisation heavy issues, and the evens being action and a bit more 'filler' issues, then I don't think that's an awful structure - I just think that, in a world where single issues cost $3-4 a pop, people might start skipping the even numbered issues in an effort to save money. This might read better in trades, which feels A) bad to say, and also B) increasingly common about modern comics. Not sure how I feel about it.

[amateurlogs]

howdy folks!

here's my review on the entire Bridgerton universe.

now 'lettuce' rate them!

starting off low...Season 1

season one by far is my least favorite one. the fake dating trope (which i believe this season was a play on) was not my cup of tea. by the end of the season i did not feel that they were truly in love LOVE with each other. with everything that they went through, especially with the baby, it feels like simon doesn't really love daphne. but then again simon does and still gives me the closed off vibes, even if he's totally obsessed with you.

i also wanted to talk about THAT scene with the couple. watching it in real time was so shocking?? a part of me sees where daphne was coming from when she found out that he COULD have children, but he DOES NOT want them. but still the most rational thing to do in that situation is talk about it before you force him to have one.

from that point on i looked at her differently. that's probably why i still don't like their relationship.

with that being said, i didn’t completely hate the season. it was a nice and pretty solid one. the other characters were nice and really made me enjoy the show. the music also??? i love the tie in of modern day music into that beethoven type feel.

that's all i have to say about it though😭.

now on to the BEST so far...Season 2

i’m still blushing at kanthony, like they are just perfect! enemies to lovers will forever be THAT trope (when done correctly).

going into it i knew that they would end up together, but it was still unsettling to watch anthony and edwina together. however, seeing him try to woo kate for her blessing and in the process fall in love with her was just so good (hope that made sense lol).

and the bee scene omg. like the amount of concern in his face??? like he was loosing someone he loved all over again. it was amazing.

nothing felt rushed. everything rolled smoothly. i have zero complaints about their relationship.

the only off thing with this season is how much we saw the featherington’s. now don’t get me wrong, i am a penelope stan (even after discovering her secrets) but i do not care about the rest. like the stuff with the fake jewelry was so unserious. however, the whole jewelry situation did bring collin and p closer so maybe it was for a good cause. (idk was she’s sees in him but ill support a woman and her hobbies)

that's all my thoughts that i can think of for now. (i could literally talk about them for hours)

idk what to say for this one...Queen Charlotte

the king and queen were CLOSE in beating kathony in my opinion. i am not a huge fan of the arranged marriage trope no matter the circumstances, so that's what deterred me.

beside that you could see how much they genuinely loved each other.

when watching bridgerton i always thought that the queen was tired of the king. like she didn't want to deal with him. but after watching QC, you can tell that she actually cares for him. she just hates that there's nothing she could do to relive him of his burdens.

between him forcing himself to "be better" for her, and her trying to comfort and console him, it was all too much. i can't tell you how many times i cried while watching.

now for my critiques!

lady danbury… like the scenes with her and her husband were sooo unnecessary and uncomfortable. like one? i could understand because of the parallel between the time when they did it, to when she did it with lord bridgerton. but the second and third time was just too much.

other then THAT the rest of the series was good. i mean the dance number with if i ain’t got you solidified it imo.

❥ that’s all i have to say (for now). overall it’s a amazing series and i can’t wait to watch more of it. if they were to make another spin off, then i agree with everyone that violet and edmund should be next! idk what happens in the books, but for them i imagine love at first sight.

❥ rating: 3.5 trees out of 5. there is always room for improvement, but again it’s a pretty solid romance. i highly recommend! and if you didn't know it's on netflix if you want to watch.

❥ also sorry if this review is all over the place. i literally can not organize my thoughts. until next time!

xoxo, amlog

[girltomboy]

As planned I watched Nope tonight. And as expected, it was a fascinating experience that made me wish I could cozy up inside the mind of Jordan Peele. It's a wild movie that defies expectations and genres, the story is given to you boldly and honestly. Look, man, this floating entity is hiding in clouds and swallowing horses - and much more. Pretty straightforward. To me, it was a movie that didn't need much explaining.

I absolutely loved the parallels between a family in the entertainment industry that treats horses like partners, and a man in the industry that treats them as bait, below him. OJ and Lucky were a team from the start, and they survived as one.

Also noteworthy are the parallels between the scene where Gordy goes on a rampage and the fate that ensued for Jupe. They are meant to perform when Gordy starts killing them all. They are meant to be watched, and so Jupe maintains this idea even as an entertainer himself - he calls the UFO "The Watchers" (or "The Viewers"? I forgot I think, my bad, I'm very ill) and says this to the audience so nonchalantly.

Of course, the creature attacks when it feels watched. But what I found super interesting is that it itself looks like an eye. One could argue it looks like a lot of things, a hat, a mushroom, an alien spaceship, etc. But in it I saw a floating eye that begged for contact so that it can feast on its audience. An eye that drains everything else around it (power, sounds, motors, etc.) and asks for utmost attention. And of course, an eye that stares back.

What I really learned to love about Jordan Peele's movies is that they end up having a happy ending - even if sinister or twisted. Maybe except for Us, but I could argue otherwise. Emerald and OJ got their footage of the alien, Angel survived too, and they all ended up safe. There's a lot to be said about the lengths they went to in order to get photographs and visual evidence of the creature, just to be believed, only for the news crew to arrive and start reporting on what they had just witnessed. Not gonna say it all was for nothing, just that I see it as a statement for a world that prioritizes footage, photos, videos in a catastrophe, rather than the safety of those affected by it. The whole movie no one is concerned for the abducted, only for the alien.

All in all, I strongly wish I had more Jordan Peele movies to watch. Nope was another 5 star movie for me, although at times it was a little too sci-fi for me, but I went in fully aware of that and enjoyed it a lot nonetheless.

[darkcircles4lyfe]

Death to All Might, Rebirth to Yagi Toshinori

So about All Might. I’ve been extremely wary of talking about what could happen to him because straight up saying “I don’t think he’s gonna die” is asking the universe to spite me. Plus it also feels like a room full of people turning to stare at me as if I said the Sun isn’t a star. Man has death flags everywhere, I know. 

But, okay, *Bill Nye voice* consider the following:

Mr. Yagi here, if he overheard everything, just received the final nail in the coffin on his career. His time as the symbol of peace is not only over, it was in fact partially responsible for the current state of things, since he once did so much on his own that his absence now makes heroes and civilians alike ill-prepared to cope. I think it was very apt for that one guy to be wearing an All Might shirt--he was acting as a mouthpiece for the latent societal problems embedded in All Might’s legacy. 

We know already that he’s been feeling useless. I love this scene and although I’m not gonna talk about it right this second, remember what Aizawa says about just “being here” being enough:

And we know from conversations with Inko that Toshinori is also reframed his purpose around looking after Izuku. But in the end, Izuku rejected his help, and it was his classmates instead who were able to save him. Now the very progress of humanity is rejecting him too. You may me wondering how on Earth I don’t see the logical conclusion of all this being his death. Hold on. It actually has a lot to do with the fact that we’re all expecting it. Nighteye himself saw it, and despite any contrary convictions anyone might have, the plot doesn’t seem to be veering away from that end. All Might Is Gonna Die, says absolutely everything. 

It’s occurring to me that I have previous experience with this kind of plotline that probably little to no one else in this fandom shares, being that I’ve read a certain book series in which the main character is told in no uncertain terms that he will die (no, I’m not talking about hp). The series in question is T*e Und*rland Chronicl*s (censoring so it doesn’t get put in their side of tumblr) and I’m sorry but I’m about to go on a shameless tangent about it and spoil the ending for you.

So in this series there is a prophecy in every book, each one having something to do with war and conflict, and so far all of them have been right. In the last book [mc] finds out that it’s prophesied that he will be killed. Lots of the things in the prophecies are convoluted and metaphorical, but no, this one literally says “when the [mc’s title] has been killed.” He spends the whole book coming to terms with this, and he gives into it, only to find himself waking up in the hospital instead. “Wow, plot twist. /s” you may be thinking, and yeah sure, the mc in a kids book survived, big shocker. But it doesn't end there. After the war, there are peace talks, but they escalate until the two sides are on the verge of declaring war again. And [mc], bless him, has just been caught in the middle of all of this the entire time. He’s sick as shit of fighting, of watching the suffering and death of people he cares about. He draws his sword against both of them angrily, gives a speech saying he won’t take a side, and then promptly breaks his sword across his knee: “There. [mc’s title in the prophecies] is dead. I killed him.” He’s giving a huge middle finger to everyone there, to the man who wrote the prophecies, to the entire fucked up culture of it all. And so something that was taken literally turns out to be metaphorical. That is, if you still believe in the prophecies at all.

Hopefully you’re catching my drift here. What I’m saying is, even though this other series has nothing to do with bnha, it goes to show sometimes it’s the most absolute certainties that are red herrings, and a “death” can consequently be a symbolic one. In All Might’s case, it could be the death of hero society and a rejection of his own past. In other words, character development for Toshinori himself that reflects on the way the world is changing, too. Also there’s the fact that the mc from that other series I’m trying not to name has an honorary title, and I’m imagining that role he occupied “dying” could correspond to something that amounts to, “All Might is dead. I (Yagi Toshinori) killed him.” 

And here’s another thing: we also have to ask ourselves what good a dead Toshinori is to Izuku, narratively speaking. Yes, Izuku has spent his whole life idolizing even the more toxic parts of All Might, and his idealized vision of his hero does need to “die.” But how about Toshinori as a father figure?  Izuku regretting that his last interaction with Toshinori was to reject his help may drive home the fact that he shouldn’t go off on his own, but at this point it’s kinda redundant. If anything it would negate some of the progress that was just made because it’d make him extra paranoid about losing other people too. To be honest, the whole “Uncle Ben” trope, the mentor/father figure who dies and gives the mc a reason to do better, is so tired. Experiencing the death of a loved one really doesn’t deserve to be romanticized like that. I might as well admit that I’m speaking from experience, and let me tell you, losing someone you love suddenly, when you weren’t around, and with unfinished business--it makes you paranoid as hell that it will happen again. It literally gives me nightmares. Y’all, I cannot stress enough that trauma does not equal character development. Granted, just because I know this doesn’t mean Horikoshi does, but in general he does seem to lead his characters toward healing.

Okay, back to the present. Toshinori is turning away from UA. He likely feels useless and rejected. We can infer that what happens next will involve Stain, and we have a couple of extra clues to go with it: Stain considers All Might a true hero, and has stated that he would let All Might kill him. And since Horikoshi loves his parallels, we also have this fight between Endeavor and this random villain who admires him so much that he wants to die by Endeavor’s hand:

This suggests a confrontation in which Stain challenges All Might to live up to himself as he once was, so that as a hero he can vanquish Stain and symbolically overcome society's perversion of that role. But based on what All Might has learned about the system he upheld, Stain is wrong. All Might is not a “true hero” in the sense that the societal issues Stain witnessed exist not in spite of All Might, but (in part) because of him, because he took too much of the responsibility for himself.

Stain probably had no idea about the personal cost of All Might’s lonely burden until after the fact. Maybe he’s seeing it now. So then perhaps the confrontation would be more about Stain claiming he’s just as fake as the rest. Either way, Toshinori has the opportunity to denounce himself and be rid of “All Might,”  to stop living in his own shadow. Nighteye’s vision has been defied before, and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the combination of society shifting + Toshinori’s own conviction is enough to do it again and work fate in his favor.

He is not All Might. He is Yagi Toshinori: quirkless, worn down, and directionless except for his dedication to Izuku. If he survives his interaction with Stain, he can resolve his imperfect mentorship by confessing about his shortcomings and simply supporting Izuku as a part of his family, not as his teacher (as Aizawa said, just “being there”). And that’s how you really get character development, for both of them. I mean, shit, imagine Toshinori straight up telling Izuku to stop calling him All Might.

[olehistorian]

Ok. So here’s my Downton Abbey: A New Era review: not really spoiler-y, but might be if you’ve not seen it yet.

I just saw the film this afternoon. The theatre was full, approximately 100 women and about two men. Many came in groups and sat together.

I plan on going back next week because I’m sure I missed some things and I just want to go again.

In my humble opinion A New Era was much, much better than the first movie. Honestly, I can now pretend that the first movie was some bizarre Julian Fellowes dream - a la Bobby Ewing in the shower. All the out of character things never happened. Molesley never made an idiot out of himself in front of the King and Queen and the downstairs crew weren’t running around scheming and playing the tricksters.

A New Era is the movie that should have been made in 2018. I think it hit the right tone between comedy and drama. I would have loved more of a true downstairs plot line, but there were a few nuggets of fan fiction-y stuff to keep me happy.

🗝🍷Chelsie - Seeing Charlie and Elsie at home, reading in bed was worth the price of admission alone, even though it was a short scene. I liked that Elsie was less snippy with Charlie in this movie as opposed to the first film. She was once again the nippy-sweetie as opposed to just being nippy. She was genuinely empathetic to Charlie at the end of the movie when they’ve learned not so shocking news. That’s the Elsie Hughes I’ve come to know and love; don’t know where she was in the first film, but I’m glad she’s back. Same with Charlie. We got to see his different sides, not just grumpy bear. The scene with Mary was touching; I love when Charlie shows his father figure, tender side. Chelsie have obviously settled into a happy marriage and all appears right in their world. Also, in the role reversal scene, Elsie was every inch the upstairs countess. I’d have loved to hear Charlie and Elsie’s conversation about her costume. I have a feeling he was impressed.

Mrs. Patmore - at one point, Mrs. P. looked like she’d just rolled up from her house of ill repute. 🤭😉 But, I’m here for it. The scene with her plotting at the dinner table was funny, and sweet. Mrs. P deserves a happy ending. You go, girl!

Daisy - was much less annoying than normal. Obviously, marriage agrees with her. I enjoyed seeing her and Andy settling into young married life.

Baxley- the movie theatre erupted into applause. Nothing more needs to be said.

Anna and Bates - they are happy. Finally.

Thomas - hopefully, he will finally be happy.

Denker - wtf happened to her hair?

I’m less interested in the upstairs folks, but that doesn’t mean I’m uninterested.

Mary - where is the Blessed Lady Mary? Hello? 😂 Seriously, I like Mary when she’s nice, but I like her bitchy side too. We got one snide remark at Edith’s expense. Maybe Mary has matured which is good because it is clear that she’s the new Dowager. Her life has already paralleled that of her grandmother even down to the type of marriage they have/had with semi-absentee husbands. Still, Mary’s quip game needs some work to live up to her grandmother’s standards.

Edith - is using her brain again. Thank goodness for that.

Cora and Robert - are blissfully happy, but why is Robert so tan?

Tom and Lucy - will be living at Felsham Hall. I wonder what Lady Jane thinks about that?🤔

The Dowager - Dame Maggie Smith - 👏🏻👏🏻. I was warned about the last 30 mins of the film, and that analysis was correct. Two hankies were definitely needed. A group of 20 year olds sitting down from me were sniffling too as were some other ladies at the opposite end.

I will say that seeing a few of the actors was a bit jarring as they have, quite naturally, aged (haven’t we all?). It reminded me that Downton can’t go on forever with all the same actors. Of course, I’d love a tv spin off with the Carson’s running their B&B with Mrs. P and Mr. Mason popping by, perhaps little Johnny Bates comes by after school for cookies. Ah, fan fiction!

It seems like Julian Fellowes has tied up all the loose ends neatly. Carson is back in charge, Cora will live, and Mary is facing up to her destiny as Downton matriarch.

If this is Downton’s farewell, I’m well-satisfied.

[burgundy-and-navy]

and now for my thoughts on paul coker (and ben)

There are few soap opera deaths that have been handled as well long term as paul cokers, especially considering he was a secondary character. I really liked paul and I liked him and ben together, despite the turmoil that defined the beginning of their relationship they were sweet together. Do I think it would have worked out long term, who knows, the point is they never got the chance to find out, paul died in such a horrific manner. And boy did eastenders turn the knife. There are a bunch of details from those episodes that keep me up at night: i love the scenes between phil and ian as they wait; the hug between ben, kathy and phil always gets to me and there's something so visceral about seeing a bloody ben pressed against kathy's pristine white jacket; there's the way at the start of the episode les leaves a cup of tea outside paul's door and at the end has to tip it out because paul is never coming home; everything about the tattoos makes emotional (and i know it wasn't a proper engagement or whatever, but you don't get that tattoo there if you're not thinking that this is the person you want to spend forever with, they were a promise, a commitment); and then there's the fact that the last time we ever saw paul alive he was walking off holding ben's hand and then he died and the last time we saw them together at all ben took his hand as paul lay in the backroom of coker's. It is all devastating, but its about the way they continually show that paul's death fundamentally changed ben.

It defines ben's development for the rest of 2016. There's the immediate grief, his relationship with pam and les, his desire for revenge (because once again this is how the mitchell's were taught to deal with emotions) and phil talking him down!! (and its such an interesting time for the ben and phil relationship because phil is trying and he's better than he has been but it's still not good enough and its pretty bad when grant is the one to tell him he has to go to the funeral). And the grief informs how he reacts to phil's illness, the fact he can't bear to lose anyone else and is trying to distance himself by the end of the year, but not being able to fit in with the beales either. So he's adrift from both sides of his family, and the fact that this life that he made himself, with the boyfriend and the flat and the family was taken away from him in the space of a night (and don't think about that one too much).

in 2017 we see the renewal of grief during his 21st as he's reminded of the plans they made, and there's a over a year until he tries dating again and we get the introduction of the ring. Even in 2018 he kisses the ring before he leaves walford.

Then there's 2019. And the writing for ben gets so much better once eastenders introduces the vulnerability to ben by acknowledging both the full complexity of his relationship with phil and his ongoing grief over paul. And there's the scene between callum and ben with the headband, and the amazing flatwarming monologue and eastenders sets up the fact that ben telling callum about paul is this massive show of vulnerability and intimacy. And its the fact that during pride ben is playing with paul's ring before stuart comes in and attacks him. But this all tends to be grief, its in july when we see more of the trauma and the ways he tries to cope. It's not just the fact paul died, but that ben feels infinitely responsible. And he self-harms by provoking those blokes because he feels guilty and thinks he deserves it (and this directly parallels a scene in the aftermath of stella when phil goes out starts a fight because he can't feel with the grief and guilt over ben being hurt). We see that trauma every time he says he's going to ruin callum, the disaster date (all it takes is a mention), the christmas break up, even before the marriage.

And then there's 2021 and we see the grief and the trauma and the mitchell way of dealing with big emotions, and we also see these things in relation to callum and phil. Firstly max bowden's line reading of all we was doing was holding hands is absolutely devastating (did not know how many more devastating line readings were to come). But this is the first time we see callum kind of fail when it comes to paul. Don't get me wrong he's lovely and the speech about knowing how much ben loved him is so good. Callum is really good at dealing with paul's death as something tragic in ben's life. He doesn't know how to deal with it as something traumatic, something that challenges ben's ability to think rationally. Promising to get simon's details was a mistake, a well meaning one but that was never going to end well. Callum does his best, he stops ben leaving, but he is out of his depth which isn't a bad thing, it's just a thing. This is callum's first relationship, he had this almost fairytale story (until this year) where he met this guy who changed his world, he married the first person he ever really loved. He is a romantic, look at the about of declarations, the whole I spent half my life looking for something. But having ben mitchell be your first relationship is a bit like being thrown in the deep end. He has insecurities over ben's sexual history and he has no real idea of what being in a relationship means (hence all the ultimatums) and he is with someone who, bless him, has some issues. It's like a really awful sneak peek at what's to come. But phil was able to get through to ben, by listening. Callum went in with the you need to change you're behaviour, no you can't go after simon. Phil went in with if you need this that's okay but lets take a moment (sometimes phil is good). Ben responds when he thinks people are listening to him and understanding him.

And then there's 2022, the most explicit way of addressing the fact that yes ben does have ptsd over paul's death (give ben an onscreen diagnosis you cowards) and that no callum isn't great at dealing with it. And it's not just paul, when ben says he's scared that goes back decades, but paul is treated like the defining trauma in ben's life at this point (or at least the one he can openly talk about, hi stella). And we get flashbacks, and nightmares, and an inability to take care of himself given he was seen wearing his dressing gown in the middle of the day, and trying to find any way to keep callum safe, keeping his distance and when that doesn't work going on the attack (don't love the vigilantism story, bit messy, but the idea works). And i love the way they explicity address with both pam and callum that ben built a narrative for himself that if only they didn't get split up, paul would still be alive because he could have done something (because he's the hard man, he's phil mitchell's son) and really its just another way to feel guilty but it also was his way of dealing. And when he couldn't protect callum that narrative the he desperately held onto was ripped to shreds. And Callum is good in the beginning, but I think he ends up just getting tired of it. This isn't the romantic story he wants for them so he stops listening and starts with the ultimatums and the posters. Again he can deal with paul as something tragic, but not as something traumatic, so he kind of manipulates ben into changing his behaviour. He continually tells ben to get over it, like that's something he can do (don't get me wrong he can heal but that's different).

Enter Lewis. And once again the show remembers that ben telling someone about paul is the greatest act of vulnerability, intimacy and trust ben can show someone and that moment, in the club when lewis asks if he lost someone, makes me feel a little ill. But lewis said he was sorry for his loss and callum tells him to get over it. And still when it comes down to it ben chooses callum.

[yui-kuromori]

I watched Squid Game a few days ago and I have a hot take for y’all.

EPISODE 6 WASN’T THAT SAD

And here’s why:

And don’t get me wrong, I was still very upset after it was over. It was wonderfully acted, cinematography was beautiful and the way that the game unfolded was incredibly well written.

The whole issue with this episode is its buildup.

Let’s take for example Alice in Borderland’s dreaded episode 3, a counterpart to Squid Game’s episode 6. The episode that killed many favorite characters in a short span of time that broke the viewers’ hearts.

What makes AiB’s episode 3 work so well is the element of surprise that makes it so much more impactful. Firstly, its placement. By putting the “kill everyone’s” episode so early on in the season, the writers put this expectation that they’ll somehow make it out alive. Arisu has already proven to be able to save everyone from sticky situations and we as the viewers think that surely, they wouldn’t kill half their main cast so early on in the season. Characters like Karube and Shibuki usually make it out to at least half the plot, so it was shocking how they actually did die so early on.

Secondly, we have Chouta playing a red herring for this episode. Chota is the typical first death sacrifice. A kind hearted, innocent character that would probably die early on in the season to put the stakes higher and mature the other main characters. Since we were all somewhat expecting Chouta’s death, Karube and Shibuki’s come as a surprise. The underlying expectance that at least Karube will somehow survive the 7 of hearts makes the episode’s impact so much stronger, to the point that the entire fandom still theorizes on how they could have all survived. The open nature of the game also contributes to make the episode even more heartbreaking. They could *all* have lived, but didn’t.

Now, Squid Game’s “Kill half the cast” episode came a little later on, and anyone that has any experience watching battle royals types of media was already expecting it at this point. There was no way that the entire main cast was making it out alive, and honestly? They made it farther than I personally expected.

The construction of the killed characters also does the episode no favors.

The old man was never going to make it all the way through. He had an overall well rounded character arc with the Main Character, and as sad at it was, his death was fully expected. There was no wonder in there, no question. From the moment the game was announced we all knew which one of them was going to survive. I was also kind of expecting for him to die in his sleep because of his illness, with the buildup of him laying in the bed, sickly and all.

Ali had also no chance of survival. He very much fit into the same category as Chouta did. When he was first introduced, saving the main character, grim faced and strong, I had hope that he would make it, but as soon as he blinked those innocent eyes, smiled and trusted Sang-Woo, I knew he was done for. As soon as the games started, I knew he was going to die. I was expecting his death the entire season. As well written as Sang-Woo’s betrayal was, there was no way his death could pack a huge punch without the element of surprise.

Lastly we have Ji-yeong, the girl who sacrificed herself. She had some wonderful dialogue, and her actress was doing the most, but surprisingly, she was the death that least impacted me. When I first saw pictures of her and Sae-byeok on Tumblr, I was expecting for them to have walked in the games as friends already. There were so many parallels drawn between her and Karube from AiB, which made her feel like even less of a well developed character to me.

With Karube, we have two full episodes with him as a main character to get to know him. As little time as that may look, it was enough for us to know everything we needed about him. We see his love for his friends, his desire to marry the woman he loves. We see the uglier sides of him and the kinder ones as well and by the time he dies, we actually have something to mourn over. His relationship with Arisu is what really sells his death for me, they clearly had so much love for each other.

Ji-yeong however, had roughly two episodes, one where she had very few lines and the one she dies in. All that we know about her has been told us, rather than shown us. She shows up, has a beautiful 20 minutes of wonderful chemistry with Sae-byeok, literally tells us her tragic backstory and dies. There was little to mourn, little connection between the character and audience, and that really weakened her impact as a character for us. She also had no relationship with Sae-byeok other than some sort of friendliness. We saw that they had time and means to build compelling relationships in Squid Game, like the main character and the old man, so it’s kind of a shame that they didn’t develop the girls any further. Sae-byeok also barely mourns her (logically so, they didn’t know each other) whereas Arisu, who screams, goes suicidal and spends up until the very last episode still mourning his friends, keeps digging on the grief that their deaths brought to the audience.

Overall, episode 6 was kind of a disappointment. On its own it’s a pretty solid episode, with nice dialogue and emotional scenes, but the lack of buildup and characterization kind of kills any real punch that it might have had.

[sobdasha]

been thinking about the really weird dynamics of the Honda family

and the ways they parallel with the Souma family.

Tohru's relationship with Grandpa Honda has always been really inscrutable to me. It seems like Kyouko liked him quite a lot, and the feeling was mutual, so their relationship ought to be close, right? But despite relying on Grandpa around the time of Katsuya's funeral, I get the impression that Kyouko and Grandpa aren't very close after that? He takes Tohru in after Kyouko's funeral, but doesn't provide a place for her to stay during the renovations, and they don't seem to keep in touch.

I figured this was for the convenience of the plot. If Tohru was close with her grandpa, then she wouldn't have no family, no one left, after her mom died. If Tohru had somewhere else to go, it wouldn't be so vital that she be allowed to keep living in the Souma house.

I've been thinking about Shiki, though, and about Akito and Shigure as parents within the Souma estate, and I'm wondering now if this wasn't actually a parallel playing out in brilliant Takaya fashion.

Starting with a recap, because a summary of info is always useful to me:

Kyouko grows up in a family that is very much about Keeping Up Appearances and Knowing Your Place. Her dad is verbally and emotionally abusive and isn't above slapping people either. Her mother isn't affectionate and doesn't protect her, probably because she's primarily concerned with protecting herself from the fallout when anything sets off her abusive husband. Kyouko has never had her emotional needs met and she's never been socialized to see others as real people with real feelings. Before even 7th grade she's become part of the gang scene in a cry for help and attention, and because these are the only people she can kind of understand. Her father has told her she's kicked out of the house at least once prior before he finally makes good on it and disinherits her at the end of 9th grade.

Katsuya and his younger sister grow up in a family that is also very much about Traditional Values and Keeping Up Appearances. Grandpa Honda is a teacher, and he puts a big emphasis on Proper Manners (and probably also other things like Good Grades, Fitting In, and Knowing Your Place). He's stern and pressures Katsuya to become a teacher as well. We don't know what Katsuya's mother was like, but I'm assuming she was also not particularly affectionate. It's only after her illness and passing, probably when Katsuya is somewhere around 20, that Grandpa Honda reevaluates his life and what's most important to him.

From a young age, Katsuya flew under the radar by heavily masking--ie, he made a cardboard cutout of what society expected him to be, so Polite, Quiet, Respectable, Studying To Become A Teacher, while underneath it all being filled with apathy, resentment, and loneliness. His moral compass is deeply skewed--see his teasing of people, his attitude of looking down on people, his bragging admittance to using his father's influence to get away with things, his creepy expressions that are identical to those of The Root Of All Evil (ie, Shigure). He has no real interpersonal relationships--family, friend, or romantic. He's a 23 year old TA who is fixated on and marries a 15 year old girl because she's the first person he ever recognized as human--he saw her in the middle of a violent meltdown and it was the first time he was ever really struck by the realization that someone else might feel the same feelings he does.

(Which, in addition to the dubious legality and widely-regarded ickiness, is just downright pathetic. I'm sorry, but it's true. Fruits Basket itself backs me up.)

The first parallel that jumps out at me is between the stories of Kyouko and Katsuya, and Ren and Akira:

Ren is an Outsider. We don't know what her family life was before joining the Souma clan, but based on everything about her I feel it's safe to assume it was also abusive. A large percentage of the Souma family is against the marriage, but Akira is adamant because Ren is the first person he's ever connected with. Similarly, the Honda family (save Grandpa) disapproves of Kyouko and she remains forever an outsider to them.

In Kyouko's case, Katsuya is able to ditch his family and start fresh with Kyouko. Ren, on the other hand, has to live within the toxic Souma family to be with Akira. Both husbands die, leaving a grieving widow and child behind. Kyouko treasures her daughter and finds a new reason to live in Tohru, away from the rest of the Honda family; Ren, already jealous of Akito for getting in the way of her relationship with her husband (and not dealing well with being pulled even further into the Souma family bullshit with all this curse stuff), and trapped within the toxic Souma family with no one on her side, chooses to perpetuate the cycle of abuse.

The thing I've been thinking about most is the parallels between Tohru and the Honda family and Shiki and the Souma family:

As I said before, Tohru's relationship with Grandpa Honda is very strange. It's not just me--Yuki and Kyou make comments to this effect also, I'm pretty sure. But I think I can finally make sense of it now, if I think of it in light of Shiki.

I think there are a couple chapters of FBA out there that I haven't read (the one with Akito, and were there other chapters beyond volume 3?), but Mutsuki implies--and I think we should take this at face value--that Akito and Shigure hope that Shiki will leave the Souma family. They are not kicking their child out. They want this as loving parents, who have done their best to raise their child in a good home in the midst of a very toxic environment. I like to think they will do a good job of explaining this to Shiki, explicitly and clearly. Akito could have walked away from the Souma family, but she chose to stay because she had a hand in perpetuating the toxicity and generational abuse in the Souma family and she is taking responsibility for trying to end the cycle. She has finally stepped up as the head of the family. She could have walked away, but she didn't.

Shiki had no hand in making the Souma family what it is. Shiki is not obligated in any way to put up with that bullshit. Shiki can and should walk away from that toxic environment, go somewhere new, and be happy. He and his parents and all his non-toxic relatives can visit and call each other and still maintain relationships, but in healthier places, as everyone learned to do at the end of Fruits Basket.

This, I believe, is what Grandpa is also doing for Tohru. He's just less explicit and messes it up at first.

I don't know exactly why we don't see more of Grandpa's relationship with Kyouko and Tohru after Katsuya's death. Is it because Tohru, as the narrator, is prioritizing Only Me And My Mom stories? Is it because Kyouko didn't want to be a burden (is that part of where Tohru absorbed it)? Is it because Kyouko couldn't maintain a good relationship with Grandpa with the Honda Family Toxicity in the background?

The Honda family toxicity shows up in full force again when Kyouko dies. Tohru is a riceball that doesn't belong in the Honda family fruits basket. No one, save Grandpa, will take her in.

And then he invites his daughter's family, which he knows is toxic and will abuse Tohru, in to live with the two of them.

I don't know who came up with the idea--if it's Grandpa, that's a bit cold, as he should be caring for Tohru. If it's his daughter ("Dad, you're getting older, you should be living with us so we can take care of you") that does make sense, both as a reasonable social expectation (which dad raised her to adhere to) and as a power move (the Outsider shouldn't be getting so cozy with dad, and dad's inheritance, without supervision). I'm leaning towards the daughter, as I don't think the family combining was intended to get Tohru to leave. I think the remodel, though, was something Grandpa Honda saw as a good opportunity to convince Tohru to leave the Hondas.

I think "I'm having the house remodeled and I'm staying with my daughter, but you weren't invited, I could pull my weight or maybe you could find your own accommodations with a friend?" was intended to give Tohru permission to not feel obligated to the Honda family. I think it was intended to let Tohru find someplace she would actually be happy, a found family living situation where she could flourish. I think Granpda sincerely thought Tohru would move in with Hanajima, instead of into a tent, and realize that she was so much happier and fulfilled there that she never came back to the toxic Honda family and had no regrets.

Grandpa's judgment was a little iffy there but he tried.

I'm realizing that, if everyone moved into Grandpa's house because it was bigger, and it's being remodeled specifically for that purpose...the fact that Tohru is sharing a room with her cousin is very significant. Grandpa was so confident, there is no place for Tohru in that house. Tohru was never supposed to come back after the remodel.

(I don't know that much about houses so it's possible that they just didn't have room; depending on whether that's the uncle or the son, you've got to have 4 or 5 separate bedrooms, which I guess could be a lot. But this is a manga, they aren't strictly constrained to realism, and Takaya makes every damn detail count.)

Tohru isn't supposed to come back after the remodel, but she does. She does, and the family is toxic to her, and Grandpa tells her more overtly that she is not obligated to live here out of familial loyalty. If there's somewhere else Tohru is happier, even if it's a really unconventional living situation, she should feel welcome to choose that instead.

Grandpa's a parallel to Akito here. He's been becoming aware, since his wife died, that his priorities were all wrong. That he raised his children wrong. That Katsuya appeared to have no real emotions and had never connected with anyone outside of Kyouko and their daughter. (Maybe he learned to make work friends?? But I doubt it.) That his daughter is judgmental and cares more about the appearance of being proper than about not being rude.

Don't think poorly of him, Grandpa says. Deep down, they're just evil people. But Grandpa recognizes that he had a hand in creating those evil people. And instead of being like Machi's mom, who goes "well maybe I fucked up" and then throws her out of the family, Grandpa takes responsibility for the family he made. He recognizes that he raised his kids in a way that caused them to be shallow and rude and to think of people as means to an end, and he also recognizes that it would be shitty to reject his kids for turning out exactly as he raised them. He has to live with them (and his choices), he says, but Tohru doesn't.

Looking at it like that, I respect Grandpa Honda more. He seemed a bit wishy-washy before--useful for some plot and character development points, but wishy-washy all the same. But it's a tough decision, and having to prioritize people is always shitty. Grandpa not rejecting his daughter means sacrificing a stable home for Tohru. Akito staying as the head of the Souma family so she can ensure the freedom of the former Zodiac means that her child will be subjected to the same generational abuse, no matter how loving and supportive of a home life she and Shigure provide.

But they're both trying to do a right thing in a crappy situation.

And Tohru, like so many of the former Zodiac, does find happiness and fulfillment in the new family she's able to make for herself. She learns to make her world bigger, and she learns that leaving doesn't have to be the same as cutting ties. And so I'm very optimistic that Shiki will find the same.

[doctorbunny]

MILGRAM theory time: Haruka!

This isn't going to go super in depth (famous last words) but there's a few heavily debated parts of Haruka's MV I want to share my findings/thoughts on because I think this is my new special interest and during my quest to get best boy's song to 1 million views I have been looking over his first MV with a fine tooth comb so to speak.

Disclaimer: As the Jackalope said in the "This is the MILGRAM" trailer, we don't necessarily know everyone's crime from just the first video, its possible that a lot of things will be re-contextualized in the second MV, however I am not psychic or bilingual and thus will only be working with content released before August 20th 2021 and translated into English (which could cause some language/cultural details to be lost on me as translation is not a 1 to 1 process).

TW for discussions of ableism, child abuse, murder and animal death. Also this is really long so sorry to all the people that follow me for non-MILGRAM stuff

Firstly, I want to start on the topic of Haruka as a person. He is disabled. He does not have 'the mind of a child' (although he is 17, making him legally a minor in both North America and Japan). He is not just 'child-like'. And he is not mentally ill (well he might be, in the sense that many disabilities like Haruka's have strong comorbidities [where a person has two or more conditions but neither directly causes the other] with anxiety, depression and PTSD, but usually when I see people talk about him 'struggling with mental illness' they go on to refer to aspects of his disability). Sometimes on tumblr, people like myself, will see canonical traits written into a character and identify them as being traits associated with our disabilities/mental illness and headcanon them as such. Sometimes this even involves saying things like "It's basically canon!" Although we understand that these characters were probably not the result of a writer intending to write a disabled person. When I say that Haruka is being written as a person with a neurodevelopmental disability, I mean the writer intended to write a disabled character and wrote them in a way that they wanted the audience to pick up on. As an autistic person (which is one of many neurodevelopmental disorders and also something I probably didn't have to specify because who else would be writing an essay about a series they got into a few days ago at 11 o'clock at night) I really like how Haruka has been written so far. There's definitely some parts of him that have been exaggerated so abled normies can pick up on his disability (namely how his MV 's main motif is really child-like drawings) but the writers also included a lot of smaller details I appreciate like how it is noted he avoids eye contact when talking to other people and is depicted as nervously pulling at his sleeves in official artwork, or how he says he finds his prison uniform (which has tight straps) 'relaxing' and when he gets nervous/tense, he will dig his fingernails into the palm of his hands. (These last two potential being examples of 'self stimulation' [aka stimming] where a person seeks out specific sensory stimuli in order to help regulate their nervous system/emotions, in this case the tight uniform creates a comforting, secure feeling [you may have heard about some people preferring to sleep under weighted blankets for this reason] and digging nails into his palms sounds uncomfortable/painful but is done in an attempt to deal with a greater sensory discomfort caused by the situation/environment) I also appreciate the depth he is written with, he struggles to communicate verbally but in his MV and interactions with other inmates is shown to have insecurities, opinions and a consistent thought process (this is all basic character stuff but unfortunately not always present in disabled characters)

Also I want to add that (in terms of what we've been shown so far) Haruka did not kill anyone because of his disability/mental illness. Disabled people are not inherently more innocent than abled people. But there is no disability/mental illness where a symptom is that you kill people and real people have to live with the stigma when you speak carelessly and suggest things like "Haruka is the kind of mentally ill person who kills people as a cry for help" 🧂 (or at the very least real people have to read BS like that and cringe). TL;DR Haruka is less child-like and more onion-like (as in, he has layers) 🧅🧅🧅

Now is the actual theory stuff, oops:

Every prisoner in MILGRAM is supposed to have committed murder in some way, obviously considering Yuno just had an abortion (which i personally do not consider an act of murder) whilst Mu literally stabbed someone to death, this definition is stretched a bit. But it is not agreed upon yet who Haruka killed/how many people he killed or why he killed.

In his MV he is shown to have chased after his dog into a forest, seen something off-screen, then beaten something into a messy pulp with a rock. Some people think the dog is a red herring and that Haruka actually killed his mother/the girl from the fireworks show/his brother. I do not agree.

First: I believe Haruka when he says he doesn't have a brother. The MV literally starts by Haruka looking in the mirror and then switching between the him now

and a really similar looking younger child who just so happened to be a key feature of his memories (I don't have the vocabulary to explain it but its like cinematic parallels that establish this is the same person at different points of their life)

Its not impossible that this is Haruka's secret younger brother, but i think its unlikely. I saw someone saying they had to be different people because Haruka looks less happy than the child but like, most 17 year olds are less visibly happy than when they were 7 (or however old the child is meant to be). Life happens.

So when Haruka is shown pushing the child around and eventually strangling him, this isn't meant to be literal (homicide or suicide), but a representation of how conflicted Haruka feels about his younger self, who may have committed the murder (if you've ever been kept awake cringing at memories of something you said in the past and wishing you could go slap some sense into your former self, this is like that but 10 times more self loathing). The lyric "I am always repeating yesterday," implies he might think about this specific past event a lot.

Moving on, its pretty well accepted that Haruka's parents were abusive in some way and Haruka internalised a lot of it: he constantly apologises, he says in his interrogation questions that his one wish come true is that "[he] want[s] to be loved" and describes in his MV how when he couldn't find the words he was looking for ("you're unfair") one of his parents "would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless.”". He seems to know its unfair but also still says he 'loves' his family, possibly mistakenly believing it is his fault, but also showing an awareness of his situation (and how his parents might behave).

Now, the MV is stylised in a way that makes certain details unclear, but there is one clear detail showing that Haruka's dog was killed

This is the first close up of Haruka and the dog. Haruka's mother is just out of frame supervising, but they look pretty happy. Notice how the puppy has a silvery chain for a collar. Somehow, this dog gets out of the house but only Haruka is shown chasing after it (whether his mother was searching elsewhere or didn't bother following her disabled son into the forest is unclear). Either way, young Haruka is now in the forest, unsupervised.

By the time he finds the dog, there is already blood, suggesting it was initally attacked by something else.

is this a sigh of relief from a boy whose finally found his beloved pet or a jealous weakling glad that nature took its course and he is finally free of that meddling mutt stealing all his mummy's attention? /j

I think this shock at the discovery that 'there is blood on his hands' could imply that rather than literally getting the blood from his dog, Haruka has seen his already injured dog and realises that if the dog got out because of him (he is previously shown to be aware his parents seem to blame him for everything) then he is the reason his dog is injured/dying and will be blamed for it. (this scene plays over the lyrics "It’s fine, though it’s really not It’s really fine, though I don’t really think so When I tried to understand it, You’ll make that disappointed face again" suggesting he is trying to avoid making his parents disappointed and letting the family pet escape into danger is something that could make them very disappointed)

now we get into rock murder (this is present-day Haruka implying that this is either: not how the scene really played out; the writers really wanting the audience to know that this was Haruka's doing and not someone else's; or this turns into a separate incident that happened much later [although note that the red sky and blue moon is the same as when young Haruka first appears at the start])

b the corpse is beyond mangled now, but its clearly the dog because the silver chain collar is still there, to the right of the body. (circled in red for your convenience :3)

My hypothesis is: Haruka didn't set out to kill his dog, but upon finding it injured (we don't know the severity aside from bleeding and also it not being able to run away from Haruka kneeling down above it w/ a big rock so it could range from treatable with a lot of vet help to already on death's door, TBH I don't think Haruka would know the difference) He knew he'd be blamed for this; made into a villain who let the poor puppy come to harm. He panicked and killed the dog out of some idea that it would make him the victim here (since he'd be found crying over a dog corpse, which might make a parent go comfort him rather than getting angry about what could've happened to the dog). This is over the lyrics: "I cried, I screamed I wanted to be a pitied and loved weakling I was in denial, I was in denial I just had to make sure I’ve become a victim, I’ve become a victim" (there's another theory that he was also jealous of the dog, which could work here too, since this is not some calculated plot; rather its a rash decision) This ties in with his Japanese song title (translated as Weakness) which is a play on a phrase sort of like "The strong eat, the weak do not" to become "The weak are eaten by society" or "The weak eat each other to survive" [once again I am reminding everyone this is based on second hand information from the youtube comments section (from users mitchki and Alphaistic) because I do not speak Japanese] This second meaning (The weak eat each other to survive) makes sense under the reading that Haruka killed his dog in order to 'survive' making his parents disappointed for the dog escaping.

Miscellaneous points:

We don't know where Haruka's necklace came from yet, it must be a gift since the most expensive thing he's ever bought was cotton candy. The younger child in the video isn't wearing it and neither is his mother or the girl in the purple dress.

Haruka's home seems quite big, at the start we can see a large flower garden outside the window and there's a forest in walking distance. This might suggest his family is quite wealthy

Haruka probably did go to school at some point as homeschooling is not a legally accepted as an alternative to public schools in Japan. (However it is estimated that up to 5000 families homeschool, this is uncommon) A lot (about 62%) of Japanese schools apparently have a 'special needs' classes and there are about 505 schools focused on educating intellectually disabled students (although I do not know which sort Haruka would've needed as whilst intellectual and development disabilities can be comorbid they aren't the same). Now, if children aged 7-14 don't go to school, their parents receive a fine, but its possible that if Haruka's parents are wealthy, they just paid it to avoid sending him to school. (This might imply they wanted to hide him or were generally ashamed of him in some way) However high school education (for students over 14) is not legally required and its likely that even if Haruka went to elementary/middle school, he hasn't been around people his own age in at least 3 years. As he seems quite lonely and glad that the other prisoners give him attention.

I don't think Haruka's parents are divorced and if they are, its not his father who left. Haruka mentions in the 30 questions that he thinks he disappointed his father. But still includes him as part of his family ("My father and mother and me"). A theory I've seen is that his father was disappointed by his son being disabled and left. but developmental disabilities (especially in non verbal and semi verbal children like Haruka) can be diagnosed before the age of 3, so I feel it is unlikely that Haruka would bring up his father if he left that early in Haruka's life

All MILGRAM prisoners have covered one of DECO*27's older vocaloid songs (DECO*27 is a well known producer who composes the music for MILGRAM) Haruka covered 'Two Breaths Walking' (https://youtu.be/puXLfVWrz2Q) which is about a boy's first relationship and how his mother's jealousy set him up for failure as the relationship becomes toxic (specifically it has some very funny out of context lines like "Whose breasts are you sucking on now?") so yeah, mommy issues: the song (Also: some people say in the song, the boy kills the girl at the end, but this isn't literal, TBW is the first of a trilogy of songs about the same relationship, it is followed by Android girl then Two Breaths Walking: Reloaded and the story resolves with the couple reuniting as adults and getting in the relationship again, although its not necessarily as abusive as before, its still implied to be codependant ending on the line 'We should live like oxygen tanks, sucking breathe from the words each of us exhale, until our last breathe')

In all seriousness, the scene where younger Haruka is walking through the city with his mother but it keeps repeating until older Haruka pulls the younger one away might indicate an attempt to focus the happier memories of his parents (since this is also over the lyrics "Why is it breaking? Tell me why? Please don’t change If I tried and couldn’t say it, You would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless.”" which depict a worse scene) I think both his parents are still physically present but have become far more emotionally distant, not giving him as much attention, which exacerbates his loneliness from not having any friends his own age to talk to

And if one of his parents did leave? I think its likely his mother since she is shown disappearing out of his reach after the dog-incident (inferring she got angry/disappointed in Haruka anyway) This could also be where he got his necklace from: Its something his mother used to wear (although this is 100% a guess) and that's why its shown to be important to him

This one is just me, but i didn't realise until a rewatch that when Haruka is watching the younger him and the girl running together, the background has fireworks. Haruka mentions fireworks being a key memory to him so I wonder if this was one of the first/last times he got to make a friend...

On three separate occasions in the interrogation, Haruka mentions not liking animals. Despite this, he is depicted as sleeping with a rabbit plush and on his birthday art (I'd include that too but tumblr only allows 10 pictures per post, so here's a link) he is standing next to a giant blueberry and strawberry cake with two bunny themed biscuits at the side. Through my experiences of seeing Japanese fandom art on pixiv, sometimes rabbits are used to insinuate a character is cute and timid in fanart.

Meaningless details: Haruka sleeps with his necklace on; he sleeps on a bed and not a futon; at first I thought he woke up holding his plush's hand but his hand is merely next to the toy; and considering the state of the pillow and blanket, I wonder if he moves a lot in his sleep or if the is just because in this case he seems to be waking up from a nightmare about the dog incident...

Final note: I've spent so many hours writing this I don't remember if i was building up to any big finale or not but I hope you enjoyed reading this! Feel free to add on in the comments/reblogs.

[miss-vortex]

Mental Health and Los Angeles' Homelessness Crisis: Why "Vanishing at the Cecil Hotel" Is One of the Most Important Documentaries on Netflix

The series observes the devastating impact of mental illness and the stigma surrounding it and teaches us that the dire problem of homelessness in the city of Los Angeles is only getting worse

SPOILER ALERT: It may be best to only read on if you have already watched the documentary series.

"Crime Scene: The Vanishing at the Cecil Hotel" is not about a cursed hotel. This documentary series is so much more than that and I personally believe that it is one of the most important documentaries to air on Netflix. So many current issues are covered that are generally brushed under the carpet and left to rot and this is one of the reasons why it must be watched.

Elisa Lam believed that experiencing Los Angeles would change her life for the better. She wanted to discover "La La Land". Instead, what she discovered was not the glamorous city she had in mind - staying only a few streets away from Skid Row in a hotel infamous for its tragic history, riddled with stories of death, drug abuse and serial killer lodgings, Elisa was faced with a gruesome reality - that reality is Los Angeles's gaping wealth divide which is only widening as time goes on.

Elisa's dreamy expectations of LA being heavily dampened by the poverty she found herself in would have no doubt contributed to her worsening mental state during her stay at the Cecil Hotel. Los Angeles is often depicted as the city where people go to find themselves - after all, it's Hollywood's home - but the reality is that the city has many more dimensions that are not represented on holiday websites or tourist leaflets.

I have seen for myself only a fraction of the poverty which adorns the streets of LA when I visited in 2019 and what I saw was shocking enough. People are living in tents only streets away from where millionaires sleep comfortably in their high-rise apartments and mansions. A taxi driver told me "The council are building more apartments in downtown LA but it's only for the wealthy. They won't do anything about the problem of homelessness."

This is brought to light in the documentary also and it is clearly highlighted how much the homeless have been forgotten about in the city - for 100 years they have been shoved aside to make space for rich newcomers. Last year it was estimated that there are about 66,433 people living on the streets in Los Angeles and this increased by 12.7% between 2019 and 2020. The main cause of homelessness in the city is too many underpaid jobs and lack of affordable housing.

The fact that Elisa ended up losing her life in a place where she was looking to escape from her troubles is truly heartbreaking. She was incredibly bright, but severely mentally ill, and I believe that parallels can be drawn between Elisa's condition and the way in which the impoverished are treated in LA. Elisa was the victim of bipolar disorder, a mental illness which is heavily stigmatised like many other mental health conditions. Some people might speculate that Elisa should have been more responsible and taken her medication as it had been prescribed to her - and whilst I agree that we all have a responsibility for our own self care, there can be many reasons why people don't take their medication. These can include the stigma behind being prescribed medication for a mental illness and not wanting to become dependent on medication. In Elisa's case, the fact she strongly believed going to Los Angeles would help her find herself may have made her feel as if she wouldn't need her medication once she got to the City of Angels - she'd be okay without it.

But as the documentary demonstrated, the symptoms of bipolar disorder can become so severe that they cause people to do things that are completely out of character and even lead to a person's death. This is why mental illness needs to be better understood and why Elisa could have had more help - her sister mentioned she had had severe psychotic episodes at home previously, so why didn't her family make sure she was 100% safe and well before she travelled alone? It would be wrong lay the blame on her family though - Elisa was an adult after all and they had to let her travel if she wanted to.

The problem of homelessness in LA suffers the same stigma as Elisa's illness in a society where the elite are catered to and the poor are simply pushed aside. A Los Angeles Times analysis conducted in 2019 discovered that 67% of people living on the streets suffer from a mental illness or substance abuse disorder - a direct result of the city's lack of social care for its poorer residents. Just like those living on Skid Row, Elisa felt rejected by society, misunderstood. Her worsening mental health was a product of the same system which has left millions of Americans deprived - a system which belongs to the billionaire class, a system which wants to maintain a spectacular image at all costs, a system which doesn't want to talk about mental health issues.

The Cecil Hotel, too, is a product of its environment. It is not a cursed place in the paranormal sense - it is cursed in the fact that lives have been needlessly lost there through the lack of resources and funding that are contributed to Skid Row. Although the Cecil Hotel has provided many with shelter, tragedies are bound to happen when people are not given the help they need to battle drug addiction, mental illness and crime involvement. The lack of security at the hotel was also shocking to begin with.

These are the reasons why "Crime Scene: Vanishing at the Cecil Hotel" is so desperately relevant in today's society. With the pandemic taking hold of the world, more people than ever before are grappling with mental health issues and the wealth gap continues to increase worldwide. There will be more deaths like Elisa's if we don't start to talk about mental health and more people will resort to living on the streets if we continue to value wealth over human lives.

[villainsandvictimsalliance]

MY HERO ACADEMIA CHAPTER 317 META :

On surpassing childhood heroes and finding ourselves with the help of our friends and family.

Okay my friends, do you remember when I talked about how Dabi and Hawks needed to surpass ir get over Endeavor?

If you don't, then let me make it short for you. Basically I said that Dabi and Hawks are still trapped in the memory of what Endeavor was and that makes them at least a little blind to the present, and specially to the future.

In order to be redeemed, Dabi first needs to heal. That means he needs some help to go pass the harm Endeavor caused him. He needs to be acknowledged, he needs someone that understands his story to help him see there are other options, options where he has a real future, not just dying or rotting in jail. He has a life, he has people that is willing to walk that road with him, he's worthy. And Endeavor was an abuser, yes, but he's meeting (hopefully) his justice and he's not able to hurt him anymore, not as he used to. He needs to get passed Endeavor being his childhood hero (and nightmare), but never forget.

Hawks goes on a slightly different road. Even when he understands many things about reality and Endeavor, he's still basing his value system on what Endeavor made him feel as a child. It's not the person he can't let go of, but the idea. Now, this is problematic in the sense that society is changing, the whole hero system is changing. He's so young and full of life, he still has time. He thinks he doesn't, he thinks his time is over. That's not true. However, Hawks needs to focus on the present and the future, needs to find his rebirth in the hands of the new generations and situations, not in the past.

On that post, the one I was talking about a few paragraphs above, I take Izuku for my example. And then Horikoshi just proved me a bit right with chapter 317 of the manga.

(spoilers under the cut )

If you've read the chapter, you know it was intense. We saw a different Deku, one that doesn't go to UA and doesn't even look like a hero. He doesn't smile, the light in his eyes is gone, and do you know who hs reminds me of?

Yes, Shigaraki Tomura.

Nice touch, because it keeps the emphasis o the parallel between Tomura and Izuku. If you want to read more about this, search in the tags of my blog. I've talk a lot about it.

Deku, who hasn't been taking care of himself correctly, even rejected All Might through a very symbolic scene. All Might, the hero he based his entire life in, was worried about him, offering food. Deku told him he doesn't need to worry anymore, implied that he's already surpassing Toshinori. Deku takes off, leaving Toshinori on his knees, with the bento on the ground, forgotten.

That takes us to the first part of this meta: Surpassing childhood heroes.

This is not exclusive of Izuku, let's clarify that. This whole path began with the very first chapter, when All Might saw in Deku something he has forgotten. He saw something new, the possibility of Deku doing what he never could.

It was the same with All Might and Nana Shimura, or with Lemillion and Nighteye, for example. Legacy, yes, but also going beyond the figure that made you who you are— or were.

An essencial part of growing up is understanding that the people you admired as a kid are not perfect. You can stay within their lines, because at least as a hero you have a duty with the public: you need to do your best, which means you need to try and do better than the ones before you. All Might is a great dude with great problems. He did many things wrong, because he's human and human do things wrong all the time, they can't avoid it. Still, he's responsible for all his mistakes, no one else can take the blame for that.

Deku wanted to be a hero when he didn't know what it implied. He didn't know the system was so corrupted, he was just a kid. So, when can't just be the type of hero he wanted to be. It wouldn't feel right. I believe the story won't allow him either.

There's nothing wrong with Deku surpassing All Might. Yes, he looks exhausted, but that was expected. He's like 16 years old and he's already the pro-heroes against a terrible being. Not just that, he also has to deal with all the knowledge he's getting. That surely is wearing his heart out. He's growing up really fast, becoming a man and getting through all the trauma. It's the war effect.

Shigraki Tomura went through this phase too. He has grown pass AFO. He's not under his control anymore, but he's still being held back. Violently.

In this shonen, Deku is our role model, right? Keep that in mind.

Now, since I've already told you that Deku is not going to be the hero he was going to be when this whole manga started, what about the name? How is this "My Hero Academia"?

Second part, everyone: finding ourselves with the help of our friends and family.

What does this even mean? Well, dear reader, not matter how hard we try, there are things we can't do alone. Overcoming a mental illness, redeeming ourselves, becoming who we want to be... We need support. We need someone to help us stay strong.

I believe that the title "My Hero Academia" refers to Deku's Hero Academia, at least in this meta. This means, this is the story of how Deku learned to be a hero. And that how it's about the old generations, pro-heroes and other figures in his life, yes, but it is only the first step.

The first time Deku acted as a hero was to save Bakugo Katsuki. Then he did it again to save Uraraka Ochaco. To save Todoroki Shoto, etc.

The point is, the teachers and pro-heroes and adult figures in Izuku's life inspired him, but they didn't teach him how to be a hero. The ones always pushing Deku farther, the ones making Deku behave like a real hero, are the younger generations, specially his classmates.

Deku needs his friends. He needs to understand he doesn't have to do everything alone (All Might's mistake) and he needs to understand that this is not just his fight. His friends are family have the right to fight to, they have the right to know what's going on. He can't just do like Endeavor, who pushed his family to the front line and then told them they could not follow him anymore.

The difference between the old generations and the new ones is that these kids have been fighting together since day one. They overcome whatever comes their way by pushing through together. Take Tsuyu and Deku with the first accident at UA. Take the kids during the summer camp, during the license exam, during the war. In a parallel, take Shigaraki Tomura and the League of Villains. They were few, but they reached the top by doing things together.

Deku needs to go beyond, but he can't forget who he is and where he came from. He can surpass All Might, but he doesn't have to completely reject him or leave him behind forever. He needs to act based on the present, but he needs to keep the past close, because the road that take him where he is, that's the road that makes him strong.

There are two lessons in here. Remember this is a meta and it's only my opinion. I can be wrong, you can add whatever you want to this or refute it. I'd love to hear what you think about this!

But well, the first lesson is that you can't live in the past. You can't live in a memory. Yes, maybe that dude rescued you or let you to die somewhere. Yes, maybe the hurt will never go away, maybe you'll never heal completely, but you can't stay there. Living in the past is the same as dying. You can remember it, but then stay in there forever.

The second lesson is that you can become the best you, the hero you or whatever, but you need people to help you. Maybe it's just one person, maybe it's a whole group, but you need someone. Bakugo could have ended up like Endeavor (in the sense of being obsessed with the first place and forgetting to be a decent human being) if it wasn't for his friends at UA. Shoto would have been trapped in his memories if it wasn't for Izuku, etc.

Don't worry, Deku is on his way to be a great hero. At some point, someone is gonna slap him or shake him out of that edgyness. And once the class 1-A and the other kids are set in motion, once they decide it's them (together as one) against all (the quirks of AFO), this is going to become My Hero Academia again.

[crossovereddie]

Actually, here is an alternative thing for you to occupy your time with, and a question I have been meaning to ask you for a while. I have finished 911 finally! So I'm ready for the new season. And I wonder, realistically, what do you think the roadmap would be for a buddie endgame?

I absolutely see how their story has been framed and filmed in a lot of parallels to how a romantic storyline would be set out. But there has been no outright mention of either of them being bi - although the conversation about Maddy setting Buck up with whassisface was very casual and could very easily have been an example of canonically bi Buck - and they are both at the end of season 4 in 'relationships' with women.

So, in your estimation, what's the timeline? What's the transition? How do they go about this and how long does it take? I wanna know your thoughts 👀

okay yes i have lots of thoughts on this and it's actually one of my fave questions i get asked. I've always watched a lot of tv shows so I'm just estimating on what I've seen before and what I would personally do. IMO this love story is a slow burn. We only have four seasons so far and only three of those seasons have Eddie in them. This unsurprisingly got long so ill put it under the cut.

So I'll go by seasons bc to me its important to look at everything that has happened so far by seasons and by love interests and not as a whole. Its the best way i can form a timeline that I think would make the most sense and why

S1: So we don't get any hints at Buck being anything other than straight and I think this is because he was supposed to be. They hadn't planned for Eddie yet and they definitely hadn't planned for the chemistry Oliver and Ryan were gonna have. S1 Buck was this reckless kid who didn't take anything serious. He was definitely super immature. Then he meets Abby and he starts to get serious about his job and his love life. I'm not gonna say "Abby changed him" because she didnt. He saw the person he was and the person he was becoming and decided on that change himself.

S2: Eddie!!!! So we get introduced to this army medic turned firefighter in the least heterosexual way. Then Buck is angry because Eddie is hot and really good at his job. they work together and Eddie compliments Buck and now they're smiley bffs. Seriously wtf was all that? Anyway this is all sus bc from what ive seen before in other shows when a main love interest leaves and a new main character replaces them, that means something. JLH replaced Connie Britton as far as big name actress but i really believe Eddie replaced Abby as far as importance in Buck's life. Do i think they brought him in with the intentions of turning him into a LI? No but they sure fueled the narrative from the get go. I think they saw fans reactions and started testing the waters.

Moving on to LIs in this season. We find out Eddie has a kid and the mother is not in the picture (eddie made sure buck knew that right away). Then later on we find out he's technically still married. shannon comes back and we get Eddie finally getting to confront this head on. He tries to get his family back together for the sake of his son. Its big for Eddie's character bc all he does and all he's ever done is for his son. Then Shannon asks for a divorce then she dies bringing this arc to an abrupt end and leaving eddie heartbroken.

meanwhile Buck is still waiting for Abby. Then he finally accepts that shes not coming back and decides to move on. He goes right back to being "Buck 1.0" with Taylor and feels bad about himself because that really isnt him anymore. He wants a real relationship. So then Ali calls and asks him on an actual date and he agrees. This is his first try at a relationship after a heartbreak. in tv these don't usually work out but are used to develop the main character's growth. We don't really see much of her but she breaks up with him so.

S3: This is Eddie finally dealing with his feelings/guilt season. This is also the season I think we really see how important Buck is to the Diaz boys. S2 had cute buckley-diaz family moments but those could still be interpreted as a best friend and his best friend's kid. This season though... after the tsunamic episode was when i really started to fully believe buddie was going canon. This season is solidifying their bond not only as Buck and Eddie but as Buck Eddie and Christpher. As I'm writing this I realized neither of them really has a love interest in this season do they? Ana is introduced but then is clearly presented as definitely NOT the right choice for eddie and especially for Chris. Then they counter that with Buck helping Eddie build a skateboard for Chris that he can use as opposed to Ana's ablest remarks about how he can't do it so just move on to something else. Then we get Buck's reaction in Eddie Begins. Buck has seen his team his friends his family get hurt on the job before but he has never reacted the way he did when it was Eddie in danger. Again solidifying just how much these two mean to each other. Don't even get me started on this season being when Eddie changes his will offscreen. Anyway we get Abby back and Buck finally gets the closure from that relationship that he needs to move forward into a serious relationship.

Now S4: jfc s4....IMO this is the only logical season to get the ball rolling on Buddie and they sure did that with 4x14 despite everything else. So i never thought they would be the first serious relationship for each other after the heart break theyve both experienced. It wouldn't be fair to their character developments. Buck tries dating Veronica and that clearly doesnt work but we know hes now open to dating again. We get Buck Begins where we see why Buck is the dare devil he is. The only way he got his parents attention as a kid was to put himself in danger. They bring back taylor and how to they ultimately get together after she friendzones him? She thinks hes in danger and suddenly wants him. As much as i hate it this is really gonna be a relationship where Buck finally stands up for himself and sees his own worth and realizes he deserves more. He deserves someone who sees him and loves him for who he is. He deserves to be chosen, something Abby Ali his parents dont do and what i think taylor wont end up doing. I feel like shes gonna choose her career over him. Maybe not in a "I'm breaking up with you" way but maybe she takes a new job and want to do LD (hes tried that twice and it didnt work for him. hes not gonna want that) or she could ask him to go with her but he wont. His family is in LA. His job is in LA. Eddie and Chris are in LA and he won't leave them. Then we have Eddie finally deciding to move on and try dating again so they bring back ana. To me it's not gonna work out so I'm not bothered at all lmao. It's interesting that they'd choose her though. Someone we already know Eddie doesn't trust with his son. There's also more buckley-diaz family scenes of them being coparents. The hildy episode, Chris running to Buck when hes mad at eddie, Buck being the one to tell Chris Eddie got hurt, then Buck staying with Chris and taking on the guardian role without him even knowing just how much that role really does belong to him. He didn't do it out of obligation. He didn't do it because he was asked to. He did it because he thought it would be best for Chris. Finally to 4x14. This is by far the biggest "Oh shit this is it. This is the beginning of buddie". We find out Eddie changed his will a year ago and has just been sitting on this info. I think Eddie knew back then what it meant but he wasn't in the right mindset to accept what it means so he kept it to himself. I think he finally started allowing himself to go there during treasure hunt. The man was jealous yall. Carla coming back and her comment about doing whats best for him and not chris is his oh shit moment. I think he wouldve broken up with Ana a few days after that if he had the time lol. He gets caught up in the mother/son sl then this poor mf gets shot by a sniper. The way that whole scene was filmed btw was not in a bff way. That was a lover watching his beloved almost die in front of him. Buck again puts himself down and Eddie decides this is the moment. He needs Buck to see how important he is. He wants buck to know how loved he is. So he sits there talking himself up to it and finally lets Buck know just how big of a part he is in Eddie's family. Buck's previous scene is him saying he wants someone who wants him back then here is Eddie saying he needs him...Chris needs him. wtf.

So with S5: I think Eddie knows and Buck has a feeling but he's not sure so what i would do is spend s5 with Eddie basically showing Buck his feelings but not exactly getting in the way of Buck's new relationship because Buck has to be the one to make that choice. Id also have chris feeling the different shift with buck having a gf like he did with Eddie. This newfound info wasnt just dropped on us for a "Aww so sweet" moment. This will business is gonna be a part of a bigger storyline. I'm hoping its with Eddie's family during maybe 5b.

So what I think would be the best timeline for canon buddie is 5a eddie already having either broken up with ana or is gonna break up with her, Buck choosing himself and ending things with Taylor by midseason finale, them bringing in Eddie's family in 5b and maybe then being when Eddie confesses his feelings for Buck. Then 6a we could get them walking on egg shells around each other not really knowing what to do bc this is all so new for both of them. This could bring just the right amount of comedy and angst especially them awkward and flustered around each other at work. A big blowup can happen between them for added angst (maybe an arguement before one of them or both of them is put in danger) then a midseason finale kiss. Then trying to find the balance between their personal relationship and their work relationship during 6b.

I don't know how long Fox shows last but procedurals can last a long time. I'm not sure thats gonna be the case for 911 especially with all the main cast staying that long so i think this would give us at least a whole season (S7) of canon buddie.

As far as then being presented as straight, there's been more seeds planted about buck being bi. A few i can remember off the top of my head: all of 2x1 lmao, maddie's comment about bucks boy crush on eddie, buck hinting at thinking eddie is cute when he thinks maddie is talking about him, the christmas elf, the comments on the instagram livestream, idk if youve watched it or not but TK's comment to Buck in the crossover episode, and like you mentioned Maddie's casual comment about setting him up with Josh. All we really know about Eddie's love life is he married Shannon when they were young and is trying with Ana so it could turn into a whole storyline for him.

I'm so sorry this is so long and took forever but i I hope i actually answered your question and didnt just get lost in rambles lmao.

[felikatze]

Just wanted to say thank you so much for all the brainworms you have been giving me and my friends for the past few hours about Ayin and all the analyses you've been doing about him.

I have been losing my mind in the middle of the night thinking about all the things you've said, turning it over like crazy and trying to compare it with the gameplay I've had of Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina.

Please do more analysis and share more of your ideas! Please? Please, with cherry on top? Please, I beg of you?

Especially if you have in-depth ideas of analyses for the Sephirah and how it relates to both their own characters and Ayin and Angela.

I thank you greatly in advance!

the implication that i've infected an entire friend group with my brainworms is power that will 100% go to my head i feel amazing. what else is analysis posting except trying to inflict people with the same thoughts bouncing around your skull on repeat

i DO have shit on the sephirah but mostly netzach, because i love netzach, and i in fact found my discord ramble about him (and chesed)

i dont have things on how they relate to A and Angela specifically because I mainly kept thinking abt Reverbaration Ensemble parallels... i have so many thoughs abt Netzach and Bremen.

(but if you want me to talk about, say, a specific core supression, or floor realization... i have a lot of thoughts on floor realizations.)

First off I am so sorry that you seem to think I'm smart because that means i have the perfect opportunity to inflict you with this

okay now we can get to the serious stuff

[transcript:

containment breach:

quick ramble abt lor again but i love the ensemble receptions so much. i'm at chesed's rn, and i know he's been chill the entire game, but him just refusing to comment on jae-hoon's tragedy seems, out of context, a dick move, but also is so important for chesed to do? he recognizes that another's suffering is not related to him, that he can't do anything about it, and that this is fine. The closest i'd describe chesed in lobcorp would be "activist burnout." Due to betraying the lab from garion's pressure, chesed was so consumed by guilt, he just blamed himself for everything and became more callous because it's already his fault, right? There's nothing he can do. But in lor, he knows what his responsibilities are, and allows himself joy where he can find it. I love the ensemble receptions bcuz they are just examplary of each patron libriarian's growth and i iqbfjc (sobs)

GOD this sure is a paragraph

also have to salute netzach for carrying his scene all by himself as the musicians of bremen just (animal noises) :pray:

ykno being online i realize that i'm not quiet at all i am a complete and utter chatterbox /end]

[transcript:

containment breach:

thinking abt netzach's scene where he doesn't talk to bremen, because he can't, but recognizes this who has not only lost themself in their own art but also their own suffering

i just i love netzach so much his entire character arc is abt learning to live with depression and learning to want to live again

so he becomes unable to understand, really, why someone would sacrifice themselves for their own art

when he started out just, similar yet different from bremen, completely submerged in his own misery

musicians of bremen reminds me i still have bremen bon bons at home i should eat those. they r tasty /end]

i wanna specifically dig into this scene more because i love that scene, a lot.

Art as we get to know it in the City is irrevocably tied to violence. Puppets are made of human bodies, music is played on bones and sinews. To the artists of the City, to create art is to make someone suffer. Rewatching Netzach's story bits, Roland describes it as doing nothing but seeking stimulation and being provocative.

Furthermore, there is a direct comparison between art and alcohol. To paraphrase more, the Pianist must've been one hell of a stimulant, like getting hit by a strong booze. A performance some are still hungover from.

Netzach's main struggle was addiction because of depression, and his growing appreciation for art is a continuation of that arc. He says himself that art and alcohol are linked.

However, alcohol is a step down from hard drugs. Netzach hasn't quit, but just that step down shows he learned moderation, which makes me very proud of him.

Moderation is what the other.. let's just call them artists, lack. I said in the screencaps above, initially, Netzach was lost in his own suffering, and the musicians of bremen are lost in their art. And if art is seen as equal to suffering, that just means Netzach and Bremen are more similar than expected. (Especially considering what we see of the musicians previously; they’re always trying to chase the same high they experienced listening to the Pianist by any means necessary. The addiction parallels are not suprising.)

I rewatched most of Netzach's lor scenes, and what rlly gets me is that in his first one, he seems almost the exact same as in lobcorp. He doesn't want to work, he got dragged into this against his will, he feels as if his accomplishments are futile.

But! He eventually invites Roland for drinks. He's not drinking to forget alone anymore, he's doing it as social activity. Furthermore, the more time he spends as Patron Librarian of Arts, the more he grows to appreciate art. Art is tied to suffering, still, but it is an expression of suffering. It does not produce any. Or should not, in any case. He sure wishes it wouldn’t.

So we arrive at his Ensemble Reception. This one makes a rather interesting comparison: art as the pursuit of the light. Let me elaborate.

To quote, “Honestly, I wanna tell people to stop doing the kind of art that requires ‘em to immolate themselves and others. Although, on the other hand... I can kinda see where they’re coming from. Art narrows your vision, after all.

You stop caring about the things around you. That’s how most artists seem to act, I think. And so, you indulge in the craft, not realizing that you’re throwing yourself and your surroundings into the fire you started.”

I pose this: Netzach speaks of his experience as Giovanni. Giovanni was a researcher who, when push came to shove, willingly sacrificed himself to advance the project, in hopes of seeing the light, seeing Carmen, again.

Though he dislikes Bremen’s actions, he does not judge them for it, because he recognized that it would be hypocritical. Even so, what shows that he’s grown is that he.. doesn’t want to see people harm themselves anymore. The focus here isn’t if Bremen hurt other people, which they have, but how much of themselves they’ve given up for their performance. He condemns the act, and not the people.

“If I can see that light once more... If I have to muster up the courage to reach it, I’ll gladly do it. It’s easier said than done, though; you need a lot of fearlessness for it.

And I guess you saw the same kind of light I was so desperate to see, yeah? Even if yours was a twisted creature... [...] Though, I don’t think I can tell you off like the others. At least I can see the reason behind it.”

He even explicitly mentions the light. The funny thing is, both Giovanni and Bremen tried to reach the Seed of Light, and Carmen. It’s tragically hilarious that we know Carmen is the voice the Distortions hear.

Hell, the more I think about it, the more you can just compare the Ensemble as a whole to the Outskirts Lab crew, down to Angelica’s puppet body and Carmen’s desecrated corpse.

“And I know pretty well that we have no right to devilishly pick apart each other’s way of art. I’m not very proud of mine, really...”

Netzach just.. gets it. I can’t remember atm, but I don’t think the other Patron Librarians really draw parallels like that. I’m seeing all the parallels now and I can’t unsee them ever. Bro.

His “art,” his way of protecting the light, is still violent. But he sees that perhaps it didn’t have to be, or rather shouldn’t be. I fucking love Netzach so much. His arc just means a lot to me personally, and I’d wager a lot of people who’ve struggled with mental illness would agree.

I’m not gonna get into Netzach’s floor realization here because this post is already long enough, but like, look at the specific flashback of Angela shown in Netzach’s story bits and contrast it to his arc of learning to want to live, and. Yeah.