#semi angsty

[screwpinecaprice]

CW for itsy bit of blood.

Giving some semi-monster (tender) lovin', requested by Dragonuva!

I very much enjoyed drawing this! 🥰

[lilybug-02]

Talking about the distinction between monsters and animals reminds me of a line by Catty in the pacifist epilogue where she says her and Bratty can "fulfill [their] dream of having a pet cat." You can ask them more about cats and Bratty jokes about eating them (which Catty takes offence from.) Bratty also implies cats are a rarity, which is interesting.

At the same time the spiders in the ruins are talked about like they're monsters, and shown to be much more intelligent than real spiders, while also being eaten.

This is giving me a headache

Also epic comic!! I am obsessed with the way you characterise everyone, Asriel and Chara's dynamic gives me life :D

As someone very invested in biology and animal science, Undertale’s (and Deltarune’s) microtaxonomy and magic system make me want to scream. ❤️

And also thank you!! I’m so glad you’re enjoying the comic! Asriel and Chara are so fun together. It’s so nice writing something not angsty between them.

[ghostscrown]

Dragons Rising 2 spoilers

Lloyd keeps his angsty reputation having panic attacks and nightmares ✨️

[demodoggonetired]

" I'm Batty 4 U "

For the @steddiemicrofic September Prompt: Charm || 548 Words || Rating: T || Warnings: implied verbally absuvie parent, implied period-typical homophobia

It sweeps through the group like wildfire after the whole Vecna ordeal. Something about everyone trying to go back to normal, re-engaging with non-world-ending topics.

Out window shopping, El happens upon a charm bracelet display and within the week convinces Hopper to buy one for her and Max. And who’s to deny the girl that's suffered through so much. 

El states it as her “momento of who she is, and those who helped her find that definition.” All while thumbing the rainbow and sunflower charms. 

So it’s no surprise when Robin, Nancy, and Erica are seen wearing their own charm bracelet designs after Girl’s Night. Then through a spidering chain of conversations and convincing, the rest of the party soon each have custom bracelets.

For Steve though, the issue is that he’s just not a bracelet sort of guy. The occasional pinching when it doesn’t sit right. Constant jangling and shifting every time you move. It’s not for him.

(Plus he knows his Dad would make him throw it out if he ever saw it. “Jewelry isn’t for men.” and all that. (Of course I don’t agree, Robin. But I still don’t want to risk it getting tossed.))

Until Robin solves the problem for him. Turning his bracelet into a keychain for his car keys. And he didn’t realize just how much he’d come to care for said keychain once it’d stop pinching his wrist. 

Exactly as El had painted it from the get-go; a constant reminder that he’s more than the harsh words his dad sneers as “encouragement”.

Of who he matters to and of who matters to him. His family. 

But it’s not for another few months that his keychain gains a companion.

“Hey, uh. Hey, Stevie.”

They’d danced around one another for weeks. From exchanged glances at the hospital, to touching under the guise of lending a hand, pulling excuses to spend time together.

“Yea?”

Finally culminating in Steve getting fed up and testing the waters with a kiss ‘hello’. 

“I know we’ve only been technically dating for a month now. But I’m pretty sure I remember you being a big relationship guy back in high school, and I figured well ‘Stevie probably never had someone buy him the cheesy anniversary gifts he bought for others’-”

“They weren't cheesy, they were well thought out-”

“And so, I got you something as a faux sort of ‘Happy One Month Anniversary’ gift.”

Eddie shoves the little trinket into Steve’s hands, forcing him to drop his book. 

“Small towns, especially Hawkins in particular, suck and so I figured this is as public as we’d be able to be. And I know the bat was maybe a bold choice considering the bites and all that shit but- Actually maybe this was a bad idea- Ya know what, give it back right now, Stevie. This was stupid- I’m gonna do something else.”

Deftly leaning away, Steve hooks his arm around his boyfriend so he can’t lunge for the keychain again.

“Oh hell no. My boyfriend gave this to me, it’s mine now. You can’t take Ozzy from me.”

“Ozzy? What?”

“Yeah, the little bat charm. His name’s Ozzy, he told me so himself.”

“What-?? Shit- Jesus Christ, you’re so lame. Come here so I can kiss your lame, adorable face.”

[thisisnotkitty]

I got one idea for Ness. Just kinda came into my head when reading one of your securitywaiter stuffs!! (Awesome btw. Did not know it existed, but I'm definitely for it).

Ness would be the type of guy (to me) to be having like. Animatronic OCs. I dunno why, he just gives those vibes in small ways. Once he showed one to Abby; Abby told her friends when she went to visit them, and Golden Freddy was just like; "well that's rude. Maybe you can bring him here if he rlly wants to be like that-" or smth.

I dunno. It's silly to me— (sorry)

No wait this is so cute-

I like to think he grew up in the town and Freddy's was a huge part of his childhood so I think it'd be cute especially once they closed down, he just kept going back to his because he misses the core four from Freddy's

[shmunter]

family reunions <3

[saintchaser]

"do we still love each other?" james asked, and it felt like the answer he might receive would crush him. he and lily were lying in bed next to each other, and he had just come home from a mission, bloody and bruised and, despite he would never admit it, barely alive.

ever since he had found out that lily would have their child, he had taken as many missions as possible in order to protect her, in order to shelter them from what could happen.

however, there was no way he could hide the ache in his heart. they had seen each other less and less the past days, days when they hadn't seen each other at all. it wasn't that james didn't love lily anymore; he did, and his heart was heavy with the love he carried for her. what about the way she felt, though?

"of course, james," lily whispered, and he knew she was sure of it; he knew it was the truth.

[hardly-an-escape]

I have been feeling like a greasy ball of goo for days and despite having many many ideas I tragically seem to have zero ability to actually write right now. also my brain is bouncing all over the place between like four different fandoms, which is not ideal with Dreamling Week coming up because I really want to get stuff done for that event!!

ugh. this is one of those times when I would really like to take my brain out of my skull, give it a good scrub with, like, a lavender-scented body soap, rinse it in very hot water, and then pop it back in. I genuinely think that would help.

[t4kalcvr]

5:31 A.M. — rockstar!semi eita x fem!reader

I can make you mad.

You stormed out of your shared apartment, the strap of your bag being strangled in your death grip as the purse swung around from the aggressive and heavy swings of your arms. Your ankles hurting from your heels and the bending of them from your frantic speed walking but all of it, you could care less about. You were furious right now.

“Y/N!!” you heard your name being called from the porch of your apartment yet still kept making your way to your car.

You heard rushed steps coming closer behind you, huffing as you knew just what was about to happen, and from the annoyance of not having the energy and patience to escape the grip now on your wrist.

“Let go of me!!” you yelled, “Fuck off Eita!!” you continued as you used your remaining strength to yank your entire arm toward you. Your patience melted away not too long ago and this was only making it worse, draining your meter below 0.

“Y/N, please just- let’s talk, please!” he begged as he loosened his grip, he didn’t want to hurt you. However, you whipped your head the other way after yanking your wrist back and proceeded to storm off.

“Okay! Fuck you, Semi,” you gave a short and bitter smile before frowning again, “There! Nice talk!” you rose your brows as you faked a sweet and falsetto tone.

Semi groaned in frustration. He didn’t mean to piss you off, really, he just expected this to go a little better. But then again he was never good at this prediction and reaction stuff, especially when it came to you. He thought you’d support him in everything even if sometimes he did make mistakes and fucked up every now and then. Regardless, he didn’t think you’d care this much to actually argue.

“Y/N—” he tried again only to be cut short.

“Semi,” he heard your voice crack, making his breath stop short as well, he felt the same burn you did and the same painful twinge of heart ache at the sound of your broken voice, “Please,” you sniffled, “just leave me alone.”

And his heart felt the sharpest sting at your words, before he slowly and quietly made his way back into the apartment, as you made it to the car, drove off and sobbed in the drivers seat.

I can make you scream.

It had been a week since the incident and Semi was miserable to say the least. He thought you’d return by morning. The same morning. But much to his heart ache, you were at a motel for an entire week.

It wasn’t until he heard the door opening at the ungodly hour of 4 am that he sat up so quickly on the sofa, watching as you entered in the same clothes you left in.

You paused as you met eyes with him. Guilt and tension already settling in the room as you made your way over to the couch. Semi had scooted over slightly, assuming that you’d want larger space than usually between you two.

You inhaled a deep, sharp breath before speaking, “Semi,” you began as you would flicker your eyes from your lap to his own momentarily, “I’m—” he cut you off.

“No! Don’t apologize!” he sighed, a small smile adorning his lips, he loved you so, he just wanted this silly bickering to stop. But that wouldn’t be the case as he instantly noticed an offended look on your face.

“Apah-” you wheezed, a sarcastic and stunned laugh threatening to slip out. “Apah! Apologize for what? I have nothing to say sorry for!” you immediately rose your voice.

Semi was stunned to say the least. “Um maybe for leaving me for a week without notice? Maybe for storming out the other night? Jeez Y/N I don’t know!?” he began shouting right back.

You took a calm inhale, closing your eyes and moving your hands along with your breathing before staring Semi straight in the eyes. “SCREW YOU!” you screamed. “I DON’T NEED TO SAY SORRY FOR ANYTHING. EVERYTHING I DID WAS REASONABLE BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU SAID. YOU NEED TO APOLOGIZE TO ME IF ANYTHING!” your voice emphasized a couple words as you stood during your tangent.

Semi let out an airy laugh before placing his hands as on knees and getting up, “Alright.” he spoke with his tongue stabbing his cheek, “I’m sorry..” he mumbled, and you hummed to signal you were listening, “sorry that YOURE SO CHILDISH!” he shouted back in frustration.

You scoffed as you put your hand back up to imitate the “talk to the hand” motion as you rolled your eyes and looked the other way.

That night was spent as is. Screaming and toxic thoughts, immature behavior, and neighbors checking up on you two.

I can make you cry.

Two weeks this time. You two didn’t talk to each other, and with your power, Semi was the one who slept on the couch as you slept in the once shared bedroom.

And as if things could not get any worse between the two of you, a simple night where Semi was angry not with himself but with you, he finally had enough of this. So, he stormed upstairs—blankets and pillows in hand—with an angry expression plastered on his face and halted at the gut wrenching sound echoing through the upstairs hallway.

Whimpers and choked up coughs. You were crying.

Semi dropped all he was carrying as he quietly crept towards the bedroom door, only to peek in and find you with your knees to your chest, hugging them and your forehead resting on top of your knees.

Scratch before, you were sobbing.

He didn’t know how much this had hurt you. And now he felt really stupid for it. Maybe he’ll just let you cry for now, and fix everything up right tomorrow.

I can make you leave.

Semi tried. He really did. He apologized. He said he was sorry. What did he do wrong? Nothing! Absolutely nothing!

….. okay maybe one thing.

“I CAN’T STAND YOU UGH! HOW CAN YOU BE SAYING ALL OF THAT LIKE NOTHING!!!” you were throwing every nearby object at him. Pillow, blankets, plushies, clothes….. lamps, platformed shoes, desk drawers, chargers, coasters.

“Y/N!!! STOP THAT STUFF HURTS!!” Semi whined.

“GOOD YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING BASTARD. HURT. CRY. DO IT.” you encouraged through rage, you were fuming so hard that your neck was red and you felt the physical temperature of your blood boiling up to your face.

“YOU KNOW IF IM SO GOOD FOR NOTHING THEN WHY NOT JUST LEAVE??!!” he screamed through your rampage. Suddenly, everything stopped.

You could only hear yours and his deep, labored breathing and the small shuffle of feet. “You wanna break up?” you rasped, your voice rough and dry from all the shouting.

No, I want to work this out. No, but if you want to. No, but I want what’s best for you. No, but you just made me feel really insecure..

“Yes.” he spoke back.

You dropped the last item in your hand by your feet, “I’ll be gone in three days.”

I can make you hate me for everything.

You kept your word. All your belongings were packed in two days but you kept the third to make sure all was packed and because of the moving truck. You were going to go back to your parents house not too far and go apartment hunting asap.

But the third day seemed long so you went ahead and pulled out your laptop, opening a website and scrolling through possible options.

You heard footsteps coming down from the stairs, “Just can’t wait to leave huh?” Semi’s bitter tone of voice rang through the emptier apartment. Most of the decor was yours, he had loved letting you style up his old apartment to something more appealing, made it feel more like home with you everywhere.

“You’re the one who suggested, and I’m not going to be some bum loser in my parents’ basement.” you spat back.

He let out another sour laugh, “whatever.”

And even if you thought that was the end, it most definitely wasn’t, “Trust me, living in your parents’ basement isn’t what’s making you a bum.” And as much as it stung Semi to say, he was still angry.

“Fuck you Eita.” you seethed.

“Can’t anymore sweetheart, and please, just call me Semi.” he grinned as he grabbed himself some coffee from the kitchen.

“No problem. I fucking hate you Semi.”

But I can’t make you come back to me.

Semi gripped his guitar, fidgeting with the red bass guitar keychain dangling from his jeans, he was remembering all you had done for him. You supported him through everything and he never returned your kind gestures, he was selfish and he would’ve been further consumed by his negative thoughts but he heard his bandmate shout from stage, “Sem! Come on! Shows about to start, we need our best out here!!”

I can make a world out of broken dreams.

He felt his voice have a slight crack at the memories flooding his mind, oh of what could have been. What if’s flashing all over as he scanned the crowd through blurry vision. Could he have spent his time on one knee right now asking for your hand? He could. But he decided to spend it on both knees, asking for forgiveness, picturing you, picturing the perfect you two could have had. Anything to make his heart feel a little less heavy.

I can make you say things you don’t mean.

All your insults and angry, furious, frustrated words flashing through his head. Those words were never heard of until those nights. That single month of non-stop fighting and yelling. Hell Month. A month he could’ve spent loving you last before he set off. But no, you both spewed venom at each other like you truly felt nothing. And it could’ve been avoided if he tried to be even the slightest bit considerate of how you ever felt.

I can unmake all we were made to be.

In his head, it was still you two. You physically separated from him but you were still frustratingly imprinted and tattooed into his heart and soul. He never loved anyone like he loved you. Hell he never even loved anyone, and then you struck him down to be head over heels with you. Love was stupid. It always made things hurt more, Semi strained as he put his raw emotion into his performance.

But i can’t make you come back to me.

So, if that was the case, why can Semi swear he’s seeing you appear backstage right now, flowers in hand and a large gift. He immediately halted all movements, almost dropping his guitar if there wasn’t a strap to it.

He wanted to ask so many questions, because it had been 2 years.

“I heard you were performing here..” your voice was weak, but you looked so beautiful. God, it hurt Semi so much to see you because all he wanted to do was touch you to prove this wasn’t a dream, to kiss you because if it was.. “And I missed you, Semi…”

he did not want it to end.

copyright © t4kalcvr 2023 all rights reserved

a/n: this is like my first “drabble” cuz i’m so obsessed with this song rn and idk i got semi vibez from it if his gf and him ever ended up like this because it’s semi although it could also qualify for suna maybe??? but the time which is the title is literally the exact time i got the idea and it took me an hour to write so i’m sorry if it sucks :’) ANYWAYS STREAM BACK TO MEEEEE!!! hope you enjoyed reading!

bookshelf

[whumpacabra]

Day 9: Bees

Head injury, concussion, medical setting, semiconsciousness, implied captivity and torture, implied nonconsensual body modification [cochlear implants], referenced smoking, referenced broken bones [ribs]

[Directly follows Revive]

Wolf had taken care of bees, a long time ago. His grandmother kept them behind her house, a white box barely a meter tall. He could remember the smell of summers there in the country, honey and hay and the hum of thousands of wings.

Here and now, there was blood and tobacco smoke and the hum of electricity behind his ears.

Close enough to his childhood summers, he supposed.

The sounds - he was pretty sure they were sounds - were swarming in his ears. An alien sensation buzzing in his well drugged brain. Hearing without sound, like touching without feeling. There was a numbness to it that was far more frightening than the voices (he was pretty sure they were voices) hovering around him.

“And how long until he’s recovered?“

“Recovered?” Wolf couldn’t understand the words, but he knew he was hearing them. “Fuck knows if he’ll ever - ”

“What Andy means to ask is how long until he’s stable?”

That voice. The sound - something in those reverberations made his skin crawl. It didn’t help that the familiar stench of cigarette smoke was breathed over his face.

“He needs a few weeks. At least two - maybe three. His ribs were a fucking jigsaw puzzle, thanks to you. Not to mention - ”

“Two weeks. How long until those implants start working?”

If not for the drugs in his blood Wolf would have flinched from the sharp sound snapping next to his head. His natural hearing caught it, a soft snap of deft fingers, but the humming behind his ears turned it to a piercing blade that buried itself in the soft tissues of his brain.

“They already are. We won’t be able to calibrate them until he wakes up - ”

“How long until he’s awake?”

“Given his injuries he should rest - ”

“I didn’t ask how long he should rest, how soon can you wake him up?”

Wolf couldn’t wait for them to shut up. Everything was too loud - he couldn’t wait to go back to sleep. He had been dreaming, dreaming about something he could almost taste honey sweet past the iron on his tongue.

“24 hours. But sir - ”

“Good. Get him up and let me know as soon as he is.”

“Sir, he may not be completely lucid until his injuries have had time to heal. Physically, he can’t - ”

“Don’t worry doc. I’m not taking him out of medical. And I won’t lay a hand on him until you give the all clear.”

Another sharp sound - cruel laughter that barely registered as anything other than a painful cacophony in Wolf’s brain. “We just need to have a little…debrief about his situation.”

[Directly before Linger]

(Part of my Freelancers: Swansong series)

[peachsayshi]

let me edit this ex husband nanami piece~

[starflungwaddledee]

I love how stark the contrast is between your cute sparkly Waddle Dee sona and then HEART CRUSHING ANGST. Ik you don’t do all angst but they’re the ones that come to my mind first. Which is kind of a roundabout way of saying I LOVE how hard (or soft!) you go which your art.

awaaa thank you so much!! it might come as no surprise but i get this irl as well; i'm a very... hm... cutesy? presenting person (just like starstruck) but my range of work is really varied!

people who encounter me only on a surface level- where i am bubbly, friendly, cheerful and extremely light hearted- tend to be surprised that i'm capable of whipping out the like... angst or trauma or even straight up horror. my professional work outside of kirby fandom included everything from magical girls to dark fairytales to gothic horror!

sometimes having a wide range is a downside, because it's harder to nail a market as a freelancer; especially with original content. but i'm glad i can explore whatever takes my vibe at the moment!

don't get me wrong, i adore cute fluff as well and i have loads of that under my belt too! i hope i do post at least... some cute stuff! i think that the more story-dense works i've posted here certainly seem to be angst though haha

ngl i just really like when people are like "NOO WAAUUGH" in the tags so that certainly keeps me going with it 😂🤣

[the-cat-at-the-theatre-door]

This was going to be something else but here’s whatever this is instead

[asheoninactive]

For the longest time I was confused why people were saying Final Wonderland was the final part of the baika watan AU . Turns out I’ve been watching the wrong one because there are TWO ososan AU song series that use it

[pokemonvillage]

Title: Birds of a Feather Characters: Volo, Akari AO3 Link: (Here) Word Count: 2868 Warnings: Shippy! My take on Akari. Spoilers for events after defeating the Fifth Lord and Mission 13, and if you squint/know what you're looking for, spoilers for the whole game.

In a ‘harsh, cruel world’ where you had to struggle to survive, fit in, or get tossed out to the ravenous fangs of the wilds… Who could trust you if you were deemed an outsider? Who could you trust?

The first day of her exile had been spent wandering with no recourse, turned away by those she hoped she could trust. The first night had been little better; she’d wasted the day supplicating for aid and couldn’t make even the most basic shelter, despite those red skies casting an eerie glow over everything.

And then Volo found her, sometime in those hours between late and early. His familiar smile, his kindness, the ready way he spoke to her without fear, blame, or reservation… The dam broke, the tears came, and embarrassingly (in retrospect) she couldn’t stop herself from hugging him. When was the last time she’d hugged anyone? Other than her Pokemon, months. She used to give her mom a hug every time she saw her! Her friends, too. Needless to say, people in Hisui weren’t exactly used to such sudden displays.

He accepted it kindly enough though, touching a hand atop her head and saying nothing as he let her have her moment. Where would she have been without him? Yes, she had her Pokemon, she could have found a way to survive, but it’d have been hard and time-consuming, and would wear her down in every way possible.

They made their way to Cogita’s hideaway, made introductions, settled on the most basic accommodations. Exhausted as she was, Cogita opted to wait until the morning to speak on the weighty matters of duty and what must be done next.

So her second night in exile -the first at Cogita’s retreat- Volo set up his little tent bedecked in Ginkgo Guild colors. It was no bigger or more elaborate than the ones the Survey Corps used, but plenty enough for them both to sleep, he assured her. She was so exhausted that she couldn’t offer much in the way of even polite resistance, or ‘worry about the implications’. 

Volo sat just under the further edge of the tent, a variety of papers and old books splayed around his lap. He poured over them by the light of the campfire with a weighty focus she could feel, but was too tired to comprehend before she inevitably dozed off. 

The third night, however, with a clearer goal in mind and a renewed sense of purpose, she sat up under the tent, hugging her knees and staring into the campfire. Haruki was curled up at her side, one of his long ribbons curled loosely, almost idly -but certainly with purpose- around her ankles as he lightly snoozed. 

“Shall we get an early start in the morning then? I’m afraid I don’t think that red sky will give us the luxury of taking our time,” Volo mused as he moved to hunker down beside her, words never accusing or harsh, always with an air of levity. 

“Yeah, probably a good idea to get a move on it,” she nodded, not taking her eyes away from the fire for a moment. But then she turned her gaze towards him with a smile, feeling that innate relief and comfort that always seemed to come with his presence. “Thank you again, Volo. You know, if this really works, you’ll be a hero,” she said with complete honesty, but also a hint of playful teasing. He blinked at her, eye wide and brow raised high.

“How exactly do you imagine that? You’re the one who’ll be having to face these trials, might I remind you.” 

“And it’s not as if anyone else would have been able to point me to Cogita’s doorstep, and gotten me the information on these trials,” she gave a firm nod of her head, “Nope, it’s all thanks to you.”

“Haha… I suppose that is true,” he chuckled quietly, thoughtful for a beat before he continued. “Though I’m more than happy to leave all future accolades to you. After all, I’m merely interested in-”

“The ruins,” her voice overlapped with his, laced with a laugh. His own laughter followed suit. 

“You know me too well,” he said praisingly, but in the back of her mind there was a blip of a thought: that she didn’t know him well enough at all. Not nearly as much as she wanted to, at least. 

Though, that was probably for the best. All of this stuff with the rift seemed connected with her, of course, but once this was solved, and she’d sought out all Pokemon as she was told… she’d be going back home, right? It wasn’t like she was avoiding making friends or any close connections, and she didn’t think she could have stopped it if she wanted to, but she was constantly aware that one day she would go home and leave all of this behind. At least, that was what she hoped. Or what she thought she hoped… 

For a while there, she’d been getting very comfortable with life here. She thought she was a part of Jubilife Village now… But now she had to wonder, how much of it had just been polite masks of friendship and civility, and how much doubt and mistrust had still lived on beneath those masks? Living in exile definitely made it feel a bit easier to want to go home these days. 

Part of her didn’t care so much about having her name and deeds slandered, she knew what she’d done, and why she’d done it, even if she didn’t always have the best answers or reasons, none of it had been out of malice or ill intent. But it still hurt… To have fought so hard, to have so many wounds marring her body for these people, and to be so easily cast out, as if on a whim. Even if she told herself ‘she understood’ why, it didn’t change the weight or the feeling of betrayal. 

“Vee…” Haruki nudged his head against her thigh, the ribbon around her ankles hugging her, soothing away some of the dark clouds in her heart. With a wry smile, she reached over to stroke her hand between his ears. 

“You alright? You got really quiet…” Volo spoke softly, and she nearly started at the sensation of his fingers delicately brushing the strands of her hair back from her face. 

“Oh, sorry…” shaking her head, she felt her cheeks warm as she sat up straighter. Yeah, she’d completely zoned out there for a minute, though maybe she could just chalk that up to the exhaustion and trauma. “What were we saying?” 

His lips slightly pinched, he tilted his head at her with a thoughtful hum. “Nothing important, I’m more curious what’s on your mind now.” 

It felt gently like concern, and she both appreciated that and… felt apologetic for it. He had already done so much for her, after all… 

“It’s nothing, really, just… still kind of coming to grips with it all,” she shrugged and stretched her arms out over her knees, trying to get fully back in her body as opposed to in her head. “There’s not really any time for that though, I know.” 

He was quiet for another brief moment, before he shifted a little, in a way that seemed almost to accept what she’d said and move along. His hand reached up to remove his cap, the other smoothing over his hair briefly before he fiddled with the hat in both hands. 

For just a split second, she instead made a different realization: he was fidgeting. Was he nervous about something?

“It’s a harsh, cruel world, isn’t it…?” he said very softly, and she couldn’t make out much from his expression in profile, that one silver eye locked on the simple patterns and threads of his cap. “No matter how much you do for them, how presentable you are to their expectations, you’ll always be an ‘outsider’ first.” 

And then, she had the sudden inkling that she was on the precipice of understanding… Just why he kept very carefully measured distances between himself and others. Polite, smiling, friendly, quick with a joke or a helping hand, but rarely did it seem to go much deeper. The people of Jubilife or the Celestica people, or even the other Ginkgo Guild merchants… Cogita, too, or so it seemed. 

She remembered when he’d found her napping in the Fieldlands that one day, not long after she’d first arrived. He’d extended cautious concern to her, but now she realized… He understood how hard this world could be. He had at least half expected her to be dead. 

And in a ‘harsh, cruel world’ where you had to struggle to survive, fit in, or get tossed out to the ravenous fangs of the wilds… Who could trust you if you were deemed an outsider? Who could you trust?

Suddenly, she felt very cold, and very lonely, and hugged her knees tighter. 

 “I think… that’s why it’s important to stick together,” she spoke in an almost helplessly small voice, her words feeling more like a desperate, foolishly hopeful prayer rattling coldly in her hollow chest. They were supposed to be warm, kindling to chase away the chill. “When we find the people we really connect with.” 

It was a simple, straightforward sentiment, one you could find anywhere. But she was talking to him, and she knew she was talking to him, because in this moment there was recognition. That all along, perhaps, he’d seen a bit of himself in her, and maybe that was why he’d always been a little kinder to her. Maybe that was why, even though it made him fidget with some discomfort, he opened up and gave voice to one tiny sliver of himself he didn’t allow others to see or hear. 

She felt him looking at her, and shyly raised her gaze to meet his. Again, she couldn’t quite make out what he might have been thinking, except that he seemed to be thinking deeply. Maybe he’d call her naive, or foolish. 

It wasn’t like she expected much… Almost all she wanted was a friend, someone who could accept her. And she would do the same, she’d never had a problem making friends after all… But she couldn’t help fear that he would laugh, or dismiss her, or turn her away. That she would lose the last warm, human connection she had.

The cool tips of his fingers touched the side of her face, and a shiver ran down her spine. For just a minute she couldn’t process this gesture or the reaction; some part of her brain tried, but failed. But then he was leaning closer, and her heart suddenly thudded against her rib cage as all parts of her brain were instead scattered into a frenzy. Surely he wasn’t- Was he? 

His eyes closed, and she felt his lips touch hers before her eyes fluttered shut as well. So sweet and soft - brief, but the moment lingered lazily around them. He didn’t push deeper for more, but instead slowly drew back, his hand drifting lower to rest against the side of her neck, thumb brushing her chin. 

“I…” his voice cracked slightly for how small it was, before he swallowed and gave a small shake of his head, close enough that the strands of his hair tickled her face. “I’m sorry, that was…” he mechanically pulled his hand back, and sat straighter. 

But she grabbed his hand and leaned back in, kissing him again. She didn’t want him to apologize, she just wanted him to keep kissing her. And she knew damn well she shouldn’t have. Hadn’t she just been telling herself she was going to leave after all of this, that it was better not to get too involved with people? But she also knew there wasn’t any helping matters where the heart was concerned. 

And how… How could she want to leave if she was falling in love with him?

Then, however, she felt what he’d probably felt; a rise of embarrassment at how sudden and forward this all was, and jerked back, face red. 

“Sorry- uh, I mean…” she shook her head, and he laughed - bright and jovial. 

“Perhaps we’re both getting a little ahead of ourselves?” he suggested with a smile, his hand holding onto hers. “Though I suppose I am the one who started it,” playfully, he gave a wave of his other finger. “I’ll accept any punishment you deem fit, Miss Akari.” 

Right, it was probably a rather serious offense in these times, wasn’t it? But she just laughed and shook her head, grateful for his levity, feeling a very real weight lifting off of her heart. Though, he was probably right, they were probably getting at least a little ahead of themselves. 

“Hmm, I’ll have to think up an acceptable punishment to fit the crime,” she grinned teasingly. No, she wasn’t going to call attention to the fact she’d kissed him back so they were pretty much even. “I’ll be merciful though, so don’t worry too much.”

“Truly, you are too kind,” he placed his hand over his chest and gave a bow of his head, and she laughed some more.

“Syl…!” beside her, Haruki chirped up, and Akari blushed as her laughter turned sheepish, petting him.

“Oh geez, I forgot we had an audience here,” she chuckled, “Don’t worry about me, Haruki, I’m feeling better now.” Which she said naturally, as Haruki was often very in tune to her emotions, and she wanted to simply reassure him. And not thinking at all that she was giving a rather obvious confession to just how happy that simple kiss had left her. 

Haruki was appeased though, giving her a happy little cheer and nudge of his head before settling back down to snooze. 

“Maybe he’s worried I’ll put him out of his job,” Volo teased musingly with a smirk, and Akari blinked back at him, taking just a moment to puzzle what he’d said and what she’d said together, before she felt that heat return to her face. 

“Haha, don’t be silly,” she shook her head, “Both of you are irreplaceable.” It was a simple enough thing to admit, even if it was still a little embarrassing. 

“Irreplaceable, huh?” he repeated, that surprised look on his face again, almost like she’d said something truly bizarre. For just a split second he went still again, gaze shifting away, and she thought it felt very similar to when he’d been fidgeting with his hat before. 

“Well, regardless… I had just wanted to say…” he spoke haltingly for a second, before he found his stride, “I agreed with what you said before. That we should stick together. After all, with my knowledge and your skills, I daresay we’ll accomplish much.”

“Like saving the world,” she said with a laugh and shake of her head, hugging her knees again. He was so close, she wanted to just… lean over against him, but managed to refrain. 

“But before we can hope to accomplish anything, I think you ought to get some rest. It’ll be you and your Pokemon facing the trials of the lakes, after all. Though, of course I’ll be cheering you on.”

Her gaze turned to the red skies as he spoke of rest and trials, sobering her slightly. 

“Mmm, yeah, all right,” she sighed and started moving to get herself laid down for sleeping. Yawning and half-asleep, Haruki followed suit. “But,” she spoke as she shifted around, “just you being with us is more than enough… It really does mean a lot to me, you know?” 

After all that exchange about outsiders and acceptance and sticking together, she was pretty sure he did. 

“I know,” he answered quietly, and she gave a small laugh to herself.

“Maybe you’re my good luck charm.”

“I’m afraid buttering me up won’t get you any discounts, my dear.”

She gave another laugh, curled up on her side with Haruki curled up against her stomach, watching as he pulled a book out from his bag. Though she might have told him he ought to get some rest too, it was probably for the best, or her thoughts and nerves might get the better of her. The former were already bouncing all over, thinking not about trials or red skies or exile, but kissing him again. Holding his hand again. Butterflies in her stomach thinking about him lying close to her, despite them each having their own bedroll. 

But rather than him falling into that steady focus while reading by the campfire she’d witnessed a few times by now since she’d known him, he shifted around towards her, leaning on one hand. Her heart thudded quietly once more, awed by the sight of him silhouetted in the glow of the fire, and that faint red glow from the night sky. 

“Rest well, Akari. I’ll see you in the morning.” 

That was obvious, of course, but the sentiment behind those words weren’t lost on her. Perhaps she presumed too much, but what else could she read from them? ‘I’m here. And I’ll be here. You can count on that.’ One of the few things that she could rely on, and the comfort she took in hearing it was not small as she hugged Haruki a little tighter to her with a smile. 

“Mm, you get some rest too…” she replied softly, and with a faint smile he turned back. “Good night, Volo.”

[morsartis]

Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?

In the warmth and safety of your bed you tried to ignore the way your phone was buzzing lost in the sheets. You had decided to stay home for once instead of letting your friends rope you into going to some party you didn’t want to be miserable at. Instead you’d enjoyed some alone time and crawled into bed as it had grown darker outside. Being home, on Earth, was still a surreal experience for you. But after the destruction of Alternia and the mass exodus of trolls fleeing the carnage you had slowly tried to come to terms with it. Which all yet again led to your predicament. Again your phone buzzed and giving into demands you picked it up and checked your messages. 

Most of them were pictures of the party you had declined to go to, all from Cirava. Scrolling mindlessly through them you paused on his last few texts. 

‘Where are you lmao’

‘Thought I saw you sneak out carrying your shoes’

‘I still need those back btw lol’

Sighing heavily you already knew the guy was higher than a damn kite. He usually was when he deigned to go to parties and if you weren’t with him he had a tendency to pull shit like this. Another message pinged through.

‘Must have been dreaming of bumping into you or something lmao’

It could have been a sweet compliment. Unfortunately things were never that simple. Letting the phone slip out of your grasp and back onto the bed you rolled over and tried to get some sleep. You’d managed to doze for a short bit before your phone began to buzz more insistently. Groaning in frustration you snatched it from your side and squinted angrily at the photoshopped image of Cirava on a moisturewave background. Rolling your eyes you hit decline on the call. Just as soon as you had done so the phone lit up again with his caller ID. Hitting decline again you checked the time and felt another swell of annoyance. 

‘Its 3 AM Cirava’

‘I’m tryna change your mind lmao’

‘Why’d you only call me when you’re high?’ 

Letting the phone fall onto your chest you tried to take a deep breath. He was just high and lonely. You didn’t want to be cruel but it was truthful, he really only called you when he was high. Always trying to talk you into something or another but tonight you were going to stay home and ignore it. You could apologize in the morning but not now, not tonight. Again your phone rang and in a fit of frustration you finally answered it, cutting Cirava off mid greeting. 

“Hi.” You replied flatly, “Why’d you only call me when you’re high?” 

“Lemme get somewhere darker.” He shouted over the music in the background, you knew he was only going to talk the same shit he always did. “I need a partner.” 

You sighed, doubting he could hear it over the noise. 

“Well, are you out tonight?” He continued. 

“Cirava its getting harder and harder to get you to listen, you know that right?” 

“What?” He shouted clearly not having heard you. 

“You’re incapable of making alright decisions, always having bad ideas.” 

“Its only three in the morning,” He scoffed, “and I’m tryin’ to change your mind.” 

You stayed silent. Frustration was back along with old hurt. 

“I left you multiple missed calls-,”

Unable to stand it anymore you cut him off.

“Why’d you only call me when you’re high?” You asked. Maybe it was the hurt talking or maybe you still wanted a genuine answer. Either way you knew you wouldn’t get one. For a moment the other side of the line was silent and you wondered if he’d hung up on you. 

“I can’t see you here.” He spoke, voice surprisingly subdued, “ Wonderin’ where I am.” 

What was that supposed to mean? Did he like jerking you around for his own amusement?

“It sort of feels like I’m runnin’ out of time.” He sighed, you could hear the rustle of fabric and realized abruptly that it was silent on the other side, “I haven’t found all I was hoping to find.” 

“Cirava-,”

“I know you said you gotta be up early in the morning, ‘gotta have an early night’, but I’m worried I’m startin’ to bore you, baby.” The use of the human pet name had you on edge. Cirava rarely bothered to use it. 

“Then call me when you’re no longer high.” You replied softer than you’d like. 

You knew he wouldn’t. 

He only called you when he was high.