#she goes well you provoked him and in fact you should go apologise to him

[starsandwriting]

Goddddddddd

[saphirered]

Could you do one with essek where S/O is a part of the M9 and is a Eldritch Knight and he is just simping over a strong + smart reader? (Maybe even S/O saving essek?) I hope you have an amazing day!

I’m sorry this took a while. Work have been hectic so I’ve hardly had time to write. I hope this is to your liking and have a great day yourself 😘

At first glance you definitely fit into the ‘heavy hitters’ category with a physique displaying your strength, on par with Yasha. And while you don’t hide the fact you could crush skulls with your fists you do not live up to the strong-as-a-giant-dumb-as-a-rock stereotype. You are what some may refer to as the perfect balance between ‘jock’ and book nerd; days off spent training during the day while studying well into the wee morning hours. You are a magnet for knowledge and your expertises far surpass the limits of trivial subjects they focus on the arcane. Your roots come from Evocation and Abjuration but you’ve been expanding your knowledge beyond those two schools. The prospect of a ninth school of magic, one you had no access or even knowledge of before brought great promise of broadening your horizons.

When you met Essek for the first time he might have been slightly dismissive. Not disrespectful in any way from first impressions you fell into the same category as Beau and Yasha, presumably just different. He was nothing but friendly and respectful towards you but the moment Caleb asked to learn some Dunamancy and when Essek agreed your request to join in on this lesson surprised him. Regardless, he happily allowed you to join. After your early morning runs you found yourself at Essek’s tower discussing books you had read, things you had encountered and even openly deliberating the ongoing conflict. 

You had lost track of time after a quick sparing session with Beau and got dragged into her next routine with Fjord. You ended up having to correct Beau’s ‘teachings’ at times to the point where you took over ending up into another round of sparring sessions with Fjord.

“Again.” Fjord comes at you again swinging his sword. While he certainly knows how to use a falchion his proper technique could use some improvement. You block, parry, turn left around him, strike with the pommel of your own sword against his back and send him stumbling. 

“Footwork. Again.” You say once he’s recovered. He makes sure his feet are in the right position, blade angled right and takes a deep breath as he swings again. This time more calculated and mindful of where he steps and which foot he moves first. You block his hit.

“Much better.” You praise as you push him back putting some distance between the two of you. This time he does not stumble but instead stays steady on his feet. This time you strike giving him the opportunity to parry. He does but comes in a little too close to properly strike and leaves his defences open, a deadly move in close quarters. You shoulder check and kick his feet from under him. Fjord falls to the ground and you hear Beau snicker from behind. You hold out your hand to help Fjord to his feet but behind you you feel a punch hit your side. Sneaky little… You take the punch and while Fjord tries to pull you down you instead pull him up, the momentum pushing him in Beauregard behind you and the both of them barely manage to catch each other. 

“This is how we’re gonna play now?” You give a ‘come at me’ motion and with a grin Beau does. Dropping your sword to the side and out of the way deciding when dealing with a monk not wearing any kind of armour or protection, you’re not intending to actually hurt it’s probably best to not use live steel. Hands up defensive you see Fjord dispel his blade into its dimension too. Game on. 

Beau strikes. You take the first hit but counter with a kick at her shins and a punch to her shoulder. Fjord moves in next you prevent him from moving to your back and manage to keep him to your side. With a high kick you kick Fjord back a few feet. Beau takes this opportunity to go for your other leg but you stand strong and turn it to your favour coming back around with a kick to her side. This goes on for a while, a back and forth of Beau and Fjord teaming up against you. They manage to land some good hit but so do you, to the point where Fjord is almost out of the fight. You notice them make eye contact. You call shenanigans. 

Fjords summons his blade swinging down so you summon yours back to your hand, side stepping and blocking the attack with a quick parry sending Fjord to the ground on his ass. This move took you into Beau’s space who took the opportunity to hit you. You could feel your limbs nearly freeze up for a moment but shrug off the stun. If they’re playing dirty so would you. With an open palm you strike against her sternum releasing a shocking grasp. For good measure you use your newly acquired sapping sting spell to knock her prone. You walk over to Fjord kicking the blade away from his grasp, a foot on his chest while you hold the tip of your blade towards Beau. 

“Cheaters don’t win against me.” You grin helping Fjord to his feet and dropping the blade out of offensive mode. You grab Fjords blade and hand it back to him with a pat on his shoulder. You notice Beau is awfully quiet after her defeat. You see her staring at the doorway with a raised eyebrow and a grin as she crosses her arms. 

“Looks like we got an audience to witness our ass whooping.” Your back still turned you expect it to be one of the others. 

“Seems like he’s been paying more attention to our champion than us, though. Let’s leave them be.” Fjord picks up his things and begins to push Beau out of the room. You finally turn around and see who witnessed your little training session and when you see the floating white-haired wizard looking at you in awe you have a minor panic attack.

“Essek, by the Storm Lord. I am so sorry. I must have lost track of time…” You begin apologising as he is taken out of his trance. 

“Give me ten minutes. I’ll get changed and freshen up a bit if you can still spare the time. I’m so sorry. I should have told Caleb to remind me of the time.” You go on and Essek floats over to you. 

“No need for apologies. You were otherwise engaged. Though I would still appreciate your presence in this endeavour.” He reminds you of your appointment later in the day, or rather now. They had caught a spy with a similar skillset to yours and Essek had asked for your expertise in their questioning. 

“Of course yes.” You take him back out of the training room and to your chambers. He waits outside your door while you get changed and make yourself look presentable washing the sweat from your skin and change into your regular clothes. 

After you’re done the two of you make your way to the prison making small talk. Essek seems a bit more awkward than usual to the point you swear you see a slight blush creep onto his cheeks at one point but that might just be the cold. 

“You have learned quickly. Clever use of your newfound spells.” Essek mentally slaps himself for the way the words came out. Meant as a compliment but sounded like a dig at you. 

“I know. I’m sorry. If anyone knows you don’t just use combat spells for fun and games it’s me. It won’t happen again. Believe me, your teachings are much more valuable than to be used for fun and games.” You really didn’t mean to slip up and use Dunamancy for something as trivial as a fun sparring match. You should have known better. 

“No. My apologies. I did not mean to say it like that. You use your spells cleverly. They compliment your skills and your skills are… exceptional.” Was that a direct compliment coming from the Shadowhand himself? You raise an eyebrow at him pretty sure he caught onto your bewildered look. You feel the blood rush to your cheeks. If you knew one thing about the man it was he did not just give compliments. Not to anyone and when he did you had not witnessed it. 

“So about this prisoner…” You change the subject as you approach the prison. There seems to be some kind of commotion going on and no guards up front. You both exchange glances before rushing inside. 

There’s a cowering guard in the front room. Essek goes over to him and seems to have some colourful words for the man while you keep an eye out around. The limited light makes it more difficult to see but you can hear just fine. After Essek finishes the guard rushes out of the prison, to get reinforcements you assume. You begin moving towards the hall that leads deeper into the Dungeon of Penance while Essek joins you. You push a finger to your lips before pointing ahead. 

Watching up ahead you see a few unmoving figures. Essek notices too but stays at your side. It’s too quiet and there’s too many hiding places. 

“Any weapons on them?” You whisper as Essek takes a look. 

“All standard equipment accounted for except for one long sword, a dagger and a crossbow.” Essek relays back to you inspecting the bodies. 

“I assume this is your prisoner’s doing.” Right as you say that someone jumps out from the shadows and makes a run for the Shadowhand. You notice before he does and grab Essek by the collar of his mantle pushing him away and to the other side of you as you summon your sword to deflect the attack. A second attack is made but you manage to prevent it from hitting Essek who’s still caught off guard. In your move to grab the blade you take out some gold dust, speak the words and the swinging blade is stuck in the air. The prisoner tries to grab it but is unable to move it, stuck mid-air. 

“That wasn’t very nice!” You retaliate with an attack. Hit. Essek manages to cast a quick magic missile striking the prisoner who puts some distance between you. He takes out a crossbow and aims it at the two of you. 

“You really prepared to die here? Put down your weapons and we can figure this out. No need for more bloodshed.” You try to persuade. From the corner of your eye you watch Essek reach for his components. The movement provokes the prisoner and he releases an arrow. You just in time manage to deflect trajectory of the arrow and prevent it from striking Essek but the second arrow scrapes your arm, the majority of the impact reduced by the edge of your bracer, it still leaves a bit of a scratch. You’ve had far worse. Essek looks at you bewildered, eyes focused only on you.

“I suggest you do what you save the staring for a later moment and help first?” You say in a half joking manner. He snaps out of it. Essek completes his spell and the prisoner is pulled backwards seemingly pulled in by some gravitational pull crushing his bones. The body falls to the ground unmoving. You go over to the body to make sure the prisoner is actually done for. 

“You are… exquisite.” You can barely hear Essek say under his breath. You freeze up for a moment not having seen that one coming. At that moment the cavalry comes in. He makes sure everything is sorted and you can go on your way, leaving them to clean up the mess, currently no use for either of you. 

“Are you hurt?” He breaks the silence while the two of you make your way back. You look at your arm. Nothing but a small scratch. But a fraction lower and it might have cut something vital but you know what you’re doing.

“No. All peachy.” The silence continues, both of you retreating into your own minds as you walk, or well, float in Essek’s case. You take a moment to look back at the past hour, his words repeating in your head and his ‘off’ behaviour. 

“‘You are… exquisite.’? That’s what you said before.” You try to mimic his voice. You may not be the best impressionist but you got the message across. Essek goes to speak but presses his lips back together swallowing whatever he was going to say. 

“Don’t tell me it’s going to take another fight with someone to get answers out of you. I might just have to show off in that case.” You wink jokingly with a half smile. 

“I wouldn’t complain.” That comment leaves your mouth agape and you stop in your tracks for a hot second to recover. 

“I don’t know if that’s sarcasm, a challenge or you actually mean it.” You fall back in line at his side nearing the tower.

“I wouldn’t complain.” Essek repeats once more.

“Well then, perhaps I should find a nice and rowdy tavern or talk to the Aurora Watch to join some training sessions to grant your wish.” You suggest only half serious with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s a date.” He returns your expression as you reach his front door. 

“Though, for now I think some reading would be just fine. Would you like to join?” He opens the door and waits for you. You step inside but stop and lean in a little bit.

“It’s a date.” You say with a smug smile and kiss his cheek as you enter looking over your shoulder. You seem to have the ability to make the Shadowhand swoon and boy, could you get used to it. 

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

Before Dawn ~ Pt2~

Hii!! This is part two of my new series. I hope every one of you like it, I'll be tagging the story with it's title so it's easier to find.

Warnings: mentions of attempted murder

@wakatosji I figured I should tag you but if you don't want me to tag you its alright, I don't want to be annoying ❤️

Comfort tea

"Ew?" First goes Lynne. Her face is contorted with a puzzled expression as she lifts her eyebrow to Petra's sudden requiry.

"Well, yeah, kinda" Nanaba shoots a glare to Nifa, as if judging her for her choice of words before she simply brushes the question with waving her hand. Seconding that, as if she knows what you were about to say a few moments before she sets her blue set of eyes on you. A gulp finds its way down your throat as her cold gaze pierces through your body and it's not long until you get the message. The girls' voices echo through your head as if you're listening from afar for you're drunk in your own thoughts.

For instant, you hate the fact that the first time you try to willing open up about a new feeling, you're overshadowed. The urgent need to spill your guts on the subject becomes more prominent by every single minute passing and yet you force yourself to keep it in. You're not about to physically burst your guts like a corpse under the hot summertime sun because of your emotions, so you should be fine if you collect your impatient self.

"Shut up Petra, I'm serious." A playful chuckle leaves Lynne's mouth.

Maybe, it's the fact that Nanaba knows you too well that lifts some weight off of you for now when at the same time she's stopping you from saying something you'll regret. And thus, you bite your lip and reluctantly decide to ignore the throbbing of your own thoughts.

"He handpicked me for his squad!"

:readmore:

Oddly enough you don't feel any jealousy creeping in your system by hearing Petra's words thanks to Nanaba putting you in your place. Even though, you're sadly reminisced of various scenes of your past where you've been in this very position after your mother has barked at you to stay in place you utter not a single word. Your head almost always automatically goes blank so you're not taken aback by your lack of reaction. Whatever Petra says you're sure going to overthink later, when sleep won't be willing to take you for the night.

"Captain really needs someone else in his squad right? Everyone has five members and he has four. (Y/n) why are you even in Mike's team, you could fill this blank right?"

"It's a special operations squad Nifa you dummy! He handpicked everyone!" Petra's adorable bunny smile is directed towards Nifa this time who gives her a cute puckered smirk of approval in return. It's almost too precious of an interaction for you to miss.

"Mike handpicked (y/n), right after me." Nanaba's voice bores casually into conversation while she takes her eyes away from her plate and lands them onto you. "So, what were you about to say?"

"Uhm" Your mind trails back to today's most random event "Henning imitated Tomas after I said good morning and scream 'nice tits (y/n)'. I totally gave him the finger." This simple choice of words helps avoid any unnecessary drama in your girls group. At least you had some dignity not to throw hands over a man anyways.

_____

"Hange stop squishing my cheeks, I can't sit with the higher ups."

"But you did last week!"

"You dragged me!"

Hange's response is only a silent hmf followed by her ever so memorable toothy mischievous grin. She begins taking steps towards you that only increase as one foot follows the other. Despite not being in a playful mood, you decide that running seems to be the best thing to do in the moment to get yourself away from her. If she catches you, she's dragging you with her once again.

Your heart is erratically pounding in your chest as you sprint down the many hallways of the headquarters, out of breath and dizzied by hunger. You reluctantly pause for a second to catch your breath amidst waiting for the inevitable to happen. Devil sure works hard but Hange and her determination work harder, you're reminded of that everyday, you tell yourself, not only when her hand lands onto your shoulder. You mentally punch yourself in the throat for not keeping your body in a better shape.

"I am not letting you starve again, let's go!"

All while during dinner you converse with Mike and Erwin on shortage of hygienic and sanitary products, something that concerns the commander excessively. Soldiers' access to basic necessities is always a top priority in the Scouting Region and commanders are to always tend to their needs. Erwin is and should be no different.

Levi seems to have his mind in your conversation and ignores Hange entirely while she's speaking some Titan nonsense to him. His eyes often widen when Erwin expresses concern on lack of soap and talks about his predictions on its practical annihilation, but it's only what you utter next that grabs his attention enough for him to turn his head in your direction.

"We can make soap. We don't have to keep putting orders for it to be made. I was taught to make soap at home and I'm sure many other girls know."

Silence spreads fast as if a traveling shadow on sunset on the table after you speak. Erwin's batting his eyes in yours, Mike too and Levi looks at you with that usual unamused expression of his. How come they had never thought about that?

Well probably because it wasn't always that there was such shortage in almost fucking everything.

"My office after dinner, cadet." Levi speaks, breaking the silence with his stern sounding voice. "There's something I need to discuss with you."

__

"Yes sir!" You reply in a heartbeat with a small bow of your head.

Not long after, the distinguishable tone of the curfew bell fills the air, making most soldiers get up from their seats instantly. Levi sits still in his spot as his fellow higher ups bid him with farewells and goodnights to which he replies with casual, nonchalant hums. Upon seeing most of the plebe has left he orders you to stand up and follow him.

He can't help but take a few vague looks of you with the corner of his left eye and he wonders if you do the same from time to time as you march behind him. It doesn't take long for the two of you to reach his quarters, but when you do he takes a stand to unlock the door before proceeding to let you in, him following asuit behind you.

"Here have a seat." He offers unsure of where to point to except for the dark colored loveseat near his desk. "I wanted to know how you even took the knife out of my hands." He watches as your facial expression turns into something along the lines of an almost undetectable disgust and sorrow, your brows forrow and your lips pucker. You couldn't hide it even if you wanted to and maybe the fact that he provoked such reaction from you bit suddenly on his gut and kept chewing on it.

"Just because you were a thug, doesn't mean you're the only one who gets to handle a knife you know." You finally answer, scratching and scrunching your nose in uneasiness. Almost mechanically, the next question comes out of his mouth without remorse.

"Oi what does a brat like you want to do with a knife. You don't strike me as the thug type. You're too uptight for that." A few moments later his gut is going to make him regret ever asking you in the first place.

"Uptight? Ugh, why would you even care, I bet your mother didn't try to murder you in your sleep or with any chance she could."

He grits his teeth inside his mouth and immediately closes his eyes in horror. That horrible feeling of his gut being chewed forms into bits and pieces of wild inner comburst within his organs. Though he cannot phantom what you have been through, he is able of making vivid potential images in his mind that will probably contribute to another sleepless night.

He turns to face you in hopes of being able to mouth anything that could cut through the uneasy tension he's created but at the sight of you he's overthrown. That heart breaking sob that leaves your lips, those thick streams of tears down your cheeks, he won't make it if he keeps looking at you in this condition, all he wants to do is scream, for he's witnessed enough cruelty and damage in this world and it seems that it's never enough. Human bloodlust is never enough.

"I'm s-sorry. I just. Why did I say that?" You faintly utter with uncertainty masking your shaky voice.

"It's fine, as long as you get over it." He definitely despises himself because of that line because in the name of heaven and hell how do you simply ask someone to get over such trauma without sounding like an entitled asshole. The motions that his eyes catch in the dim light of his office are skinny, hard but fragile at the same time and they all hint to you wanting to leave, presumably due to the lack of consolation on his part. He just determined he'll do better. You helped Isabel back on the day so he lets you this one.

"I-I'll excu-"

"Do you have any prefered beverages?"

"M-milk tea" you quietly huff. He's not quite sure whether a drink will ease your boiling pain, but at least he's hoping it'll soothe your current state.

His heart is officially aching with agony and pain that refuses to mellow even a notch, even if he begs to any profoundly selfclaimed wall God. Ever since a year ago he's been living within the heart of crime and downgrade garbage, respected for his violent ways and easily feared for his inhuman skills. In that dirty, shit smelling drain, overpopulated with humans or rats -or probably both, he can't possible distinguish them- who piss in any corner they find, he thought he'd seen any gruesome thing a man can do, but that rough melancholy in your eyes convinces him he's so casually wrong.

"I apologise for bringing such subject up, (y/n), here's your tea. Though due to shortages we don't have any milk." You matter him a word of gratitude as he sets the cup next to you. He'll never let you know, but he notices you're surprised by his actions even in that state you're in.

"She's dead. My mother. She died last month and-" you trail off your words "I guess it's more of me being emotionally chained to my abuser." Levi just pops his head in his palms and sighs deeply at the sound of that but never comes to find the right line up his textureless thoughts should take for him to form a sentence.

"Kinda looks like piss don't you think?"

"Huh?" If he could hear your words correctly and not partially because of the turbulence in his mind he would have thought of an instant smart come back.

"The tea, it looks like piss." At the sound, he barely manages to hold in a chuckle.

He knows yet he manages to only scoff in response. "I had to tremendously water it down, be mindful." He opts to suggest always in that bland tone of his.

"Do other people except from us drink it like that?"

"I desperately want to doubt that anyone cares to provide for your golden shower enthusiasm, so no. This is some of my personal stash."

The two of you enjoy your comfort tea in sheer silence. Levi can't take his eyes off of you, not that he's trying to, but he tries to convince himself it's only because you've verbally shared your trauma with him. In return, for some of his, he didn't have to share, you were there to see Isabel's head laying on the blood stained grass with Farlans upper body accompanying it. He wants to speak up, but his mouth is seldomly never in a place to voice out the exact thoughts in his head, so even if he tells you about Kenny and his childhood you never get to hear it. In addition, he's not the one to try and overshadow somebody who speaks about themselves by sharing his experience so the comfortable silence that has sprawled in the whole of his office is more than enough.

______

Here's the deal. Henning likes Lynne, Lynne likes Tomas, Tomas likes you and you like Captain Levi, not that hard to grasp right? As long as no one neglects their soldier duties everything is fine.

It's a plain sunny Sunday in the Survey Corps headquarters. Mike is on a day out, perhaps strolling around the city of Trost in chance of finding any merchant to provide for soldiers necessities, while you're assigned with cleaning his office.

Levi is standing at the doorframe, back pressed upon it with his hands crossed over his chest as he supervises the six of you go. He promised the blond squad leader to keep an eye on his team seeing that things would get heated up pretty easily nowadays, ending up in heated arguments most of the time as well.

Every time his eyes meet yours you avert your gaze away, specifically to the floor you're set on scrubbing until your hands bleed. He can't help but notice it. Small little movements of awkwardness from his part make you tense even if you're oblivious to his awareness of the fact.

"Tch" He tries his best to shake you off the territory you're occupying in his mind. It's not right for him to endulge in something frowned upon after having just received a position as a high rank. That's not his purpose here. Emotions should never color your judgement in battlefield.

"I'm taking a break." You call to the others as you stand from your kneeling position. You pat your hands dry on the sides of your hips and you hope Levi doesn't notice, because you won't see the end of this.

"I'm coming with you! Wait for me." Tomas announces and you respond a soft 'sure' along with a warm smile. "Ah God, I'm so thirsty!" The two of you walk past Levi at the door, but you never spare him a look, in fact you're too invested in your small talk with Tomas to even ask for permission to excuse yourselves.

"Love birds, huh Nanaba?" Gelgar elbows the blonde with puckered his lips, a ridiculous expression plastered on his face. "I wonder how long until we get the good news-"

"Gelgar just shut up."

"What Lynne? Poor Tomas might finally get his chance with the kid."

Lynne loves you and your group of friends deeply. She and Nanaba are probably the big sisters of the group. They've stuck with you, Nifa and Petra through thick and thin, through bloodshed and tragedy, so she's not mad at you for having caught Tomas' attention. With your melancholic youthful face, (h/c) hair that blows softly in the wind, with the way you pucker your lips when you're determined or angry. She's probably mad at herself for never acting on that cadet trainee crush she had on Tomas. She sets her mind on recovering quickly from it.

Despite opening her mouth to speak, she notices it's not her voice that's heard, but in fact it's a deeper, almost nasal one.

"Set to work, tch, don't waste your energy on royal teenage drama."

"Sir! Yessir!"

Irritated, Levi bites the inside of his cheek, without ever changing the look in his eyes. You were kind and behaved well mannered to everyone, that was all. That was was led you to act nice to Isabel and what led her to speak highly of you to him. Nothing more. Nothing less.

 

"It's alright! Get up" with your eyes shut, you smile at the redhead who's sprawled across the grass while holding out your hand to her. Isabel smiles back and she proceeds to take your hand, taking another chance to spare with you again.

For a few nights she won't shut up about you. How you don't look down on her like other girls do, how you iron her clothes just like her big bro does.

"I'm going to miss her when were free of here, Farlan!" The red head takes a bite of her bread and munches softly on it. Before she even has a chance to speak another word she feels a hand ruffle her hair but notices that Levi's hands are concentrated on the simple task of feeding food in his mouth. She spares you a heart warming smile and wave but you fail to reciprocate as your friends gesture you to sit.

"You're gonna make me miss her too and I don't even know her." Farlan says and places a hand at the top of his head, scratching a soft spot.

"Ahh, big bro! Can we kidnap her!"

"We're not kidnapping anyone. We need to focus on our mission alright Isabel?"

Isabel shushes at this but doesn't fail to shoot you a glare. And this time you respond with a wave. Whatever you lack in word choosing skills you make up for kind acts. She wishes they kidnap you, she needs a female friend anyways.

Hey you there, yes you, thanks for taking time and reading this, I appreciate it more than I can express. If you want to see me write something for you make sure to leave a request in my askbox! Any comments on how you're enjoying the story are also very appreciated. Much love until next time 💕

[strangerfictions]

Don’t Punch Me

Summary: You stuck up for Nancy by punching Steve but eventually you become friends. When Nancy breaks up with Steve he turns up on your door. Whats said that night changes you both. 

Warnings: A little bit of violence, a mention of broken bones and blood and some fluff.

Words: 3803

A/N: Okay so this is based of a text post I found on tumblr which I have typed out below. I loved the story behind it and so I decided I wanted to write a fic based off of it. This takes place from season one when Steve spray paints the things about Nancy on the cinema through to after season 3. As always requests are open!

Prompt : In elementary school I hit this kid cause he said I can’t punch and I broke his nose and then my stepdad picked me up and the office was like “you have to say sorry” but then the kid was like “but she proved me wrong, she doesn’t have to say sorry” ladies and gentlemen my best friend of many many years.

You were driving into school when Nancy told you about the weekend. You never really liked Nancy but he had made her happy for a while and so you got over it but now you don’t care you are going to sort this once and for all.

When you pulled into school you see Steve walking in the doors just before you and so you know you would catch him at his locker. Nancy ran after you begging you to drop it, but he had to be taught a lesson.

“No way Nance. He isn’t getting away with this!” You could feel the anger build inside of you catching a glimpse of Tommy and Steve in front of you.

You walk up behind Tommy and slam Steve’s locker shut narrowly missing his hand which causes both of them to look at you stunned.

“What the hell Y/L/N” Steve shouts instantly regretting it seeing the anger in your face

“Don’t ‘what the hell me’ Harrington you know exactly why I’m here. How could you do that to Nancy! You really are living up to your name douchbag” you notice people are starting to gather around you.

“You really think because you have great hair and hang around with Tommy that you’re perfect well I’ve got news for you Harrington your not in fact your far from it. You’re a dick and everyone knows it!”

“Look isn’t the fact that Jonathan beat me up enough. Anyways you’re not capable of punching m…”

Without even thinking your fist flies up and connects with Steve’s nose. The deafening crack echoing through the hallway as everyone chants at you both. Blood dripping everywhere as Steve’s hand goes straight up to his nose. Both him and Tommy too in shock to say anything.

“If I hear of you slut shaming any girl ever again Harrington it won’t be your nose you have to worry about!”

You walk away pushing through the crowds that had gathered finding Nancy and Jonathon at your locker.

“I’m sorry Nance but…” You begin to say before she wraps her arms around your neck pulling you into a hug.

“Thanks for sticking up for me. You didn’t have to, but I appreciate it!” Nancy says as she pulls away from the hug.

“It’s fine. Pretty sure I broke his nose so with the black eye and split lip Jonathan gave him I’m pretty sure he has received the message loud and clear!” You say laughing at Jonathans reaction

“Y/N…your hand” Jonathan whispers grimacing at the sight before him.

You look down seeing a small puddle of blood on the ground from your hand. Raising your hand, you see that your hand is completely out of shape and cut on the knuckles.

“Right well I better go to the Nurses office to get something for this before the adrenaline wears off” You smile at both of your friends and walk to the Nurses office.

“I can’t believe she punched me…she actually punched me dude” You can hear Steve muttering Tommy as the nurse patches him up.

“Well I mean you did provoke her dude” Tommy laughs as you walk into the Nurses office.

“Sorry Ms Sanchez could I get a bandage and gauze please?” you see Steve looks over to you and your hand a hint of remorse in his eyes.

“Let me guess that hand is responsible for this broken nose?” Ms Sanchez smiles at as she stands up walking towards where the bandages are.

You smile at her knowing she won’t pry. The 5 minutes it takes for her to wrap up your hand is the most uncomfortable 5 minutes in your life. You can feel both Steve and Tommy watching you as Ms Sanchez gives you the verdict that you do in fact have a broken hand. She cleans your cuts and wraps your hand with gauze and a bandage and tells you that you need to go to hospital.

By the time you were called to the principal’s office you were in the middle of 5th period and you and Nancy were in physics trying to figure out an experiment. You walk into the office to see Steve sitting beside a man who you assume is his dad and beside him is your stepdad. Great you think this is all you need. A broken hand and a suspension.

You sit beside your stepdad who begins to whisper at you asking you everything and when you told him everything, he slapped you on the back telling you that it was the right thing to do and that he was proud of you. He never condoned fighting but when sticking up for yourself or others then he is all for it.

Your principle had said he would let you away without punishment if you apologised but before you could argue Steve was speaking.

“No, she doesn’t have to. She had the right to punch me and plus she kinda proved me wrong. I had said she wouldn’t punch me and then she did so yeah, no hard feelings. I just want this over with” You look at Steve stunned not knowing what to do or say but you just leave it. You feel a pang in your heart but you just put it down to the adrenaline and forget about it. Your principle is happy enough with that and you are both allowed to leave.

That was all you could remember of that day. You knew you ended up in ER that night to get your suspected broken hand checked out but other than that you couldn’t really remember much thanks to the pain killers.

Of course, Steve and Nancy ended up back together before Christmas and so you put your pride behind you and you walked up to Steve’s locker after Christmas to apologise.

“Hi” you mutter hoping not to draw too much attention

“Uhh hey Y/L/N” He looks at you confused wondering why you are at his locker and weither or not you are going to punch him.

“Look you and Nance are back together so I just want to call it truce. I’m sorry for punching you but let’s face it you kind of deserved it anyway yeah I’m sorry” you ramble not really knowing where you were going this whole time.

“Oh…okay yeah sounds good to me. I kind of thought we sorted it in the principles office that day but thanks for apologising but you’re right I did deserve it. I wasn’t myself back then and if being beaten up twice helps me learn that then I’ll take it but please don’t punch me again. My nose hasn’t been the same since” Steve grimaces thinking about it

“Yeah I don’t plan on it anyways I guess I’ll see you around Harrington”

Over the next few months you and Steve become good friends despite the fact that him and Nancy had started to drift. You really didn’t know why they were holding out. Maybe because Steve really was in love with her but you really didn’t know.

“I can’t wait for Tina’s party this weekend. It will be so great to just relax and actually have a break from homework. You should go Y/N it will be great!” Steve says taking a bite out of his apple.

“I’m not really in the mood for Tina’s parties to be honest Steve. It never ends well for someone!” You say pushing your food around your plate as you look over to Nancy who you can tell is in deep thought.

“Yeah I guess so. I bet that new guy is going to try and cause trouble” Steve says through mouthfuls of apple. He looks over at Nancy noticing that she hadn’t even touched her lunch yet.

“Ehmm I’ll see you guys later I need to get some stuff out of my locker” You decide to leave them to it. You knew Nancy had been different since they decided to get back together, but you never really brought it up, but you knew deep down what was causing this change. You knew after everything that happened, she was a different person and so was Steve and it was beginning to become noticeable. You just hoped they could work it out or end it on good terms. You didn’t want to have to pick sides.

It was the night of Tina’s party and you were glad you hadn’t gone. You had loads of homework due on Monday and so tonight was the perfect time to get it done. Your room was quiet except for the soft sound of Queen playing through your record player. The small desk lamp was the only thing illuminating you as you worked. It was about half eleven by the time you were finished. You began putting your books away when you hear something hit your window. Once…twice…three times. You walk over thinking it was just the wind but to your surprise Steve is standing outside.

You open your window but you cant help notice his eyes are red and puffy as if he had been crying.

“Steve? Hold on let me go open the door?” You walk down the stairs hoping your parents are fast asleep. You don’t know how you would explain Steve being in your house at this time of the night. When you open the door, you get a closer look at Steve. His hair has fallen slightly so small pieces were falling into his face and his eyes looked like he had been crying for hours. Instead of saying anything he just pulls you in for a hug.

“What happened?” You whisper as he rests his head in the crook of you neck.

“She broke up with me…bullshit she said…everything is bullshit. I’m not surprised though. I mean I don’t know why she even took me back all I am is a loser.” Your heart broke as he said this.

Over the past few months you noticed that Steve was never really as confident as he pretended. He was actually very insecure and so this was quite possibly the breaking point for him. You knew you would have to be there for him through this. He no longer had many friends and the fact that he turned up on your doorstep meant he considered you a friend as much as you considered him one.

“Steve you’re not a loser. Come on we can talk about it upstairs” You take his hand pulling him upstairs trying to avoiding the creaky step on you way.

You tell Steve to lay down and rest and talk you through what happened while you get a few things. As he is telling you everything that went down at the party your heart breaks more and more. The more you heard about what Nancy said the more anger you felt towards her. You had really hoped the two of them would deal with this like adults because you knew it would break Steve more than her.

“I’m sorry Steve I really am. I had noticed Nancy was being a little off, but I really didn’t think it would come down to this. Here” You place a cold cloth over his eyes as you continue to talk to him queen still playing in the background.

“I mean you were right last year. I was a dick to her so what do I expect. I’m getting a taste of my own medicine and now I know how she feels” Steve sniffles as his body shakes from being upset.

“Yes, you were but you’ve learnt. It may have taken two different people to beat you up, but you did and that shows you’re a good guy Steve any girl would be lucky to have you!” You say placing your hand on his. He sits up pulling the cloth of his eyes and looking at you. Your heart skips a little but you try to ignore it.

“Would you?” he whispers

“What?” You ask hoping this wasn’t going where you thought it was.

“Never mind” He lays back down staring at the ceiling

“Yes” You say lying beside him and grabbing his hand to comfort him. You weren’t sure if you were telling him to comfort him or you really meant it.

“But you need some time out of a relationship Steve. I think you need to grow comfortable with yourself before another relationship” You say glancing over at him to gauge his reaction

“Your right and I know your right, but I can’t help think what if you know. What if it doesn’t happen now and some douche like Billy Hargrove comes along and swoops you off your feet what then?”

“Well if it makes you feel any better Hargrove isn’t my type…far from it actually. I prefer the guys who don’t win the fights…that’s my department” You both laugh thinking back on last year.

“I’m not promising anything in terms of relationships, but I am promising to be friends” You sit up and walk over to your wardrobe pulling out extra blankets and pillows.

“You can stay tonight. You are way too upset to drive anywhere” You throw the pillows and blankets on the bed helping him get comfortable.

Once Steve is settled in the other side of your bed, he already begins to fall asleep. You took him in and say goodnight with a kiss on the forehead. You tell yourself it’s a friendly kiss, but you know better than that. The way your body was reacting to things tonight really made you question things with Steve. You really couldn’t think about this tonight. You were way too tired and he dated your best friend.

The next morning you wake up to an empty bed and a note on your desk thanking you for everything and that he would call he later. He had signed it with his initial and 3 kisses which made you smile. You had the whole day to yourself and your thoughts and so you began to think about Steve and what you had both talked about the night before. Did Steve really like you or was he just upset. Did you like Steve or were you just being nice. No, you couldn’t like Steve you broke his nose, but you knew that he has changed since he stopped hanging around Tommy. Before you could think any more on it the phone rang. Too early to be Steve you thought.

“Hello?”

“Y/N It’s Nancy”

“Oh, hi Nancy” You say it a little too formally and you mentally kick yourself for being weird.

“I just wanted to tell you that both Steve and I broke up. It was for the best, but I just don’t want you to feel you have to pick sides it really wasn’t that bad of a breakup” you can clearly hear her lying even if you didn’t know what Steve had told you last night.

“Nancy you and I both know that’s bullshit. I don’t want to take side either, but I had a heartbroken Steve on my doorstep at half eleven last night crying his eyes out blaming himself for this when we all know you were the one to blame this time. I know you’ve had a thing for Jonathan for a while, but you could have saved Steve the humiliation Nancy. You made him feel like he was worthless and a piece of shit all because you have feelings for someone else. I really get that he was a dick to you but you could have done it a little gentler!” You say it so fast and hang up that you don’t even have time to process what you said. Nancy could be really selfish sometimes and this is one of her shining moments. You don’t even know why you hang out with her anymore. She has changed since the whole Barb situation and you don’t blame her but you really don’t see this friendship lasting.

You decide to make some food but before you can even move your phone is ringing again.

“What Nanc..” you snap

“Oh, sorry is this not a good time Y/N” You hear Steve coil back into himself

“Shit sorry Steve. I just had a bit of a heated argument with Nancy is all. I thought you were her calling again” you sigh pulling over the foot stool to sit on.

“Oh. I hope it wasn’t about me because I really don’t want you taking sides. That’s far from what I want you to do actually!” You can hear the panic in Steve’s voice at the thought of you fighting over him.

“I think that ship has sailed Steve I really do. She was selfish to make you think you were the one to blame when you weren’t. Sorry I don’t know why I’m getting so worked up over this”

But you did know. Somehow over the past few months you had started to catch feelings for Steve. Every time he laughed at one of your jokes or did something small you were growing more and more in love with him and you weren’t even aware of it. You decide it was best not to bring this up right now for Steve’s sake as much as yours.

Eventually you helped Steve get over Nancy and slowly he began to come back to himself. You both were now best friends and did everything together. Fighting demigorgans…check. Babysitting the party…check. Fighting weird Russians…check. Despite doing all of this there was a weird tension between you and others were starting to notice it. Robin was the first to notice it when the three of you hung out for the first time.

She brought it up to you one day when Steve was making popcorn for movie night and you decided to tell her about your feeling for him and she told you to tell him and so you set up a plan for three days later. You were all going to a party and you were going to tell him then. Alcohol and feelings what could go wrong.

You had asked Robin to come over and get ready with you because if you didn’t have someone to push you out the door you wouldn’t ever tell him. By the time Steve arrived you and Robin were already a little tipsy from your stepdad’s whiskey.

“You’ll be fine. Just take him to a quiet place and tell him. Easy!” Robin says as you both walk down the stairs.

Robin pulls open the door to see Steve leaning against the wall. His hair is done to perfection and he looks really great. You can feel the butterflies in your stomach begin and you just hope you don’t get sick.

“Robin! I thought you were meeting us there?” he questions looking behind her for you, but you were still stood on the stairs.

“Yeah change of plan dingus. Y/N needed a little girl advice on outfits, so we are now both a little tipsy on whiskey”

“Lucky for you though Steve I can handle my drink unlike someone else I know” You grab Robins hand pulling her towards the door.

“You look great Y/N!” Steve smiles at you. You drop Robins’ hand to pull the door closed but Steve already has it.

“Thanks, you look great too! It’s so great to see you back to yourself Steve!” You genuinely mean this. You saw Steve at his worst and it wasn’t pretty. You had to pull him out of bed on a few occasions but thankfully he bounced back.

The three of you walk towards Steve’s car as Robin talks at you both about random things. The drink really taking over. By the time you get to the party your nerves have risen so much that you think you might get sick. Thankfully Robin has sobered up and she gives a reassuring nod as a little push.

“Hey Steve before we go in, I was wondering if we could talk?” You ask as you watch Robin walk away from you both.

“Oh, actually I wanted to talk to about something too! You go first though” Steve looks nervous and is playing with the hem of his shirt glancing at you.

“Okay…I don’t know if you remember because honestly, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t. The night you turned up on my doorstep after the breakup you asked if I would be lucky to have you and we kinda talked about…dating. I just…why is this so hard. Basically, I like you a lot Steve which is funny because well I hated you for a while and I broke your nose”

Before you can ramble on anymore Steve is kissing you taking you by surprise. The kiss begins gentle Steve’s lips barely touching yours but once your surprise wears off you deepen. You are both breathless by the time you pull apart.

“Yeah that’s all I wanted to say Y/N” Steve chuckles as he wraps an arm around your shoulder pulling you into his side.

“Seriously? I know Robin told me to shoot my shot, but I didn’t think…” You trail of realising that Robin may have just set you both up.

“Yeah I think we’ve been set up Y/N” Steve laughs again while you join in. It’s been awhile since you both laughed like this and it really was nice.  

“We should probably go find her and thank her then” You smile as you grab his hand leading him into the party.

“I think I have you punching me to thank” Steve laughs as you turn towards him with a questioning look

“What?” you question Steve with a smirk on you face

“Wellll…I guess it made me see you in a whole new light. You may have punched me, but it was hot. Then when you came into the nurse’s office, I knew I was falling for you I just wouldn’t admit it to myself. Especially after I got back with...well you know the rest” Steve smiles down at you pulling you into a hug.

“Who knew you could be such a softy Harrington” you say into his chest

“Let’s go enjoy tonight!” You both walk into the party hand in hand to find Robin to thank her for her meddling.

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[tartagilicious]

Heyy I saw that you write for the guys from ikemen vampire?Could I please get a Theo x mc where even though he seems super confident, inside he doesnt feel worthy of mc's love, and one time Arthur says something provoking (as he does) so Theo lashes out at him and leaves somewhere, and nobody knows what happened so mc goes to him and finds him having a breakdown and she has to calm his nerves telling him she loves him and that he's worth it and so on.. I hope this isn't too confusing! Thank you!

lol ~as he does~

don’t worry about it, it’s not confusing at all! if anything, it’s actually better if you spell it out for me. complicated requests are the best in that way, because it tells me exactly what I have to do.

Also question: what does Arthur call her? I forget and can’t figure it out, so I just resorted to him calling her ‘my lady’ when i needed to. (like Leonardo calls the MC cara mia, Napoleon nunuche, etc-?)

and warning: there are some major (but briefly mentioned) spoilers for theo’s route

— 

If there was one word to describe him, it would be ornate. His personality was a labyrinth in a lot of ways; but overall normally just annoying to some and thrilling to others with no surprises. Then, in an unseen third outcome, she had come to find his usually edged personality endearing. And he was less than used to the blank spaces she gave him.

It was easy to figure people out if you knew what to expect, but her, she’d thrown him off the moment she said a word to him. Hell, she’d done so the moment she stepped through the mansion’s doors. And she continued to throw him off, no matter how deep their relationship went, no matter how intimate their touches grew to be, she was always his anomaly.

He tried his best to cast it off, to tell himself that he didn’t need to pick and choose a personality for the woman that loved him for who he was, but unfortunately, nothing had ever been that easy. He hid his doubts and fears with unanimous words, and his concerns with equally haughty smiles,

Yet, she continued to be his anomaly still. No matter how much his personality wavered, she stuck by his side with a smile and her own equally sarcastic words to put him in his place. She always supported him whether she noticed it or not, and he had felt bad that he hadn’t realised sooner.

She truly was an angel. His salvation came with her actions that just seemed to be her second nature, and she pulled him closer to heaven with every touch on his body. But he couldn’t help but wonder if she had ever felt the same.

She had come to him from a time unknown to him, with such lavish opportunities and luxuries that he was almost positive she wouldn’t have any trouble finding a man that was better than him. her love for him was an anomaly in itself, and he constantly found himself doubting if he was the one meant for it after all.

She was as pure as silk, while he was comparable to the darkest sea.

“A fine morning to you,, ___!” Arthur greeted her one day as she walked into the dining room with his usual sly smile and blurry intentions. “You seem awfully chipper today.”

She didn’t give it much thought, though, just smiling back. “Do I?”

His eyes narrowed slightly as his smile grew. “Yes, of course. And it would be rude of me not to ask about the bloke behind such brilliance.”

She turned to him, her lips slightly pouted and her brows equally furrowed.

“How do you know it’s a person? I didn’t say anything to you, Arthur.”

Arthur just laughed, the sound bringing colour to the tips of her ears.

“Why, of course it’s a person, ___.” His voice was subtly softer as he tilted his head. “Who else besides our dear Theo would be responsible for such a smile?”

She didn’t answer as she handed him his traditional english breakfast of cold bread, boiled eggs and chilled stew, but the pigment of her cheeks was enough to tell him that she had in fact heard him loud and clear. He enjoyed teasing her very much, but found no pleasure in discomfort, so he just picked up his bread with a cheeky smile and remained silent until the man of the hour walked in minutes later.

She smiled over her shoulder as she heard the unmistakable thump of his heavy boots on the hardwood. “Morning, Theo.”

He gave her a tired but grateful smile as she slid his breakfast into a place, a slightly more modern mix of hotcakes and rookwurst.

“Wouldn’t you greet your beloved in a more, say, amatory way?”

Arthur and Theo weren’t exactly a dream team, to put it lightly, but thankfully, Theo didn’t find it necessary to push out an elaborate insult at that moment.

“It’s nine in the morning, you oaf. It’s not like I have to greet her like that every time I see her.” He grumbled, his eyes trained on the way she poured syrup onto his pancakes. It had been slightly over a month since she’d started working around the mansion under Sebastian, and she’d somehow managed to catch onto everything impressively quick even if she had been scared out of her wits for the better part of her first week.  

All of the little quirks everyone had, insignificant things that no one but her would trouble themselves to remember, it had made her a well loved member of the household . She had somehow managed to take every little detail into account, down to how much syrup to pour on his pancakes.

And he was glad she’d caught on - perhaps if she hadn’t, nothing would’ve changed and she would’ve gone back to her own world by the time the sand in the hourglass fell.

His gaze flickered up to hers as she turned away. He’d spent hours staring into her eyes, and it was scary to think that he could’ve been deprived of that if she’d made one choice differently. She was incredible. Incredibly brave, incredibly smart, incredibly beautiful - he always wondered what made her want to stay with someone like him.

“You know, ___.” Arthur smiled as he twirled his spoon around and about in his stew. “I’m sure that if I were your lover-”

She cut him off without even turning back, her voice curt. “Don’t mess around, Arthur.”

His grin was growing, she could tell as much from his voice alone as he continued, “By Jove, why yell at me for telling the truth? I’m sure anyone else could spare a hello for such a lovely lady-”

“You idiot,” She turned around just in time to see Theo’s fist clench around the fork in his hand. “You don’t know when to shut up, do you?”

Arthur spared nothing but a patient smile as his eyes narrowed.

“I’m afraid it’s only natural.”

As Theo’s confidence crumbled under the oblivious tone of Arthur’s patronising words, he stood up with nothing more than a grumble and threw his fork down on his plate with a clang.

She took a step towards him as she realised where the situation was leading, but before she could even get a word out, Theo had already turned on his heel and left the room in a cloud of irritation.

“Arthur,” She huffed. “Do you have to tease him like that? Would it kill you to leave him alone?”

Arthur gave her an innocent look, before melting into a laugh. “Don’t fret, he’s just a bit miffed. Give him a little bit to cool down and he’ll be in tip-top shape again, my lady.”

Her expression was irresolute before her lip curled into a slight frown. “Fine. I will, but quit being so mean. You didn’t have to drag me into it, too.”

He nodded, his smile turning genuinely apologetic at your words.

“I apologise, ___.”

She walked out of the dining room as Arthur turned his focus on his food once again, using the opportunity to slip out while his attention wasn’t on her. She respected Arthur wholeheartedly as an author and as a friend, but his teasing could be awfully relentless, especially for Theo, someone who tended to take every word to the heart. So, because of that, she decided to disregard Arthur’s fair warning and visit his room in hopes of talking to him.

But, there was no response when she knocked on his door.

The mahogany door was one she’d opened and closed many times, but the cold feeling of the brass doorknob that rushed through her skin upon contact told her there was no use doing either. Theo wasn’t there.

She turned away with a dispirited sigh. Theo was an art dealer, someone who could go around the city multiple times in a single day. He knew the streets and alleys like the back of his hand, and at that moment, he could be anywhere. She wished desperately in that moment that she would have spared her own wishes to chew out Arthur and followed theo instead, because if anything, she could at least see him.

“Theo,” She sighed to herself as she walked around the mansion with hidden purpose, casually asking anyone she came across if they’d seen the man in question recently.

There were no results from Issac, who had been working in the library, Leonardo, who was on his way out already, nor Napoleon, who was coming in from god knows where. But, finally, after coincidentally meeting Dazai as he was coming in through the window, she learned that he had headed off into the forest just minutes before.

So, she thanked him and excused herself with the excuse of having to find Sebastian. Of course, she needed nothing with Sebastian at the moment, and Dazai seemed to know that without her physical words. But, she still felt better giving an excuse rather than flagrantly saying her real intentions aloud.

Taking a detour from the hall that lead from the kitchens to one of the doors in the back was thankfully easier than she’d thought. She managed to avoid running into anyone thus far too, and she thought that as long as she kept her thoughts calm and her steps casual, it should stay that way.

She’d hate to be stopped just because her anxiousness was caught by someone too perceptive.

But thankfully, everyone was too busy off doing their own thing to pay attention to wherever she happened to be going, so she saw herself out with no trouble. Though she wasn’t exactly familiar with the forest’s trails and such, she still managed to make her way to where her gut told her to go without circling back too many times. And it paid off, because as she finally pushed the last branches out of the way, there sat Theo, sitting on a rock with his shoulders hunched.

Her brows knitted as her eyes moved over his back. The man was incessantly still, completely motionless other than the tremor in his hands and the unsteady breathing clawing at his chest. On the outside, there was nothing around him but the wind, but on the inside, he was drowning. In nerves or sorrow he couldn’t tell, but whatever he felt, it held onto him stubbornly.

She took hesitant steps forward, making sure that her footsteps were quiet before she reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. He barely gave a reaction other than the slightest tilt of his head, but she could feel him relax under her touch regardless.

“Theo…?”

Her voice came out soft, and the tone made his eyes shut tightly. She was obviously worried about him, and he didn’t know how that should make him feel. He was teetering on the edge, and the angel and devil on his shoulder were doing little but dividing his thoughts.

Her hand went up to duck into his hair, her thumb rubbing soothing circles into the nape of his neck as she asked, “Are you okay?”

He didn’t answer, his breathing levelling as the soothing feeling of her fingers in his hair sent calm through waves in his body. Her lips thinned at the reaction, but she didn’t give up, nonetheless.

“Did what Arthur say bother you that much…?” She trailed off, her eyes searching the side of his face as the question sunk into both of them. She hardly thought that a snide comment like that could get to Theo, but they had nothing else to go on, so it was her best guess.

His response was nothing more than a low mumble as he shifted his chin in his palm. “He was right, though,”

The moment the words came out, she let go of him for a split second before using both her hands to take his jaw and turn his face to hers. His eyes were wide, but they showed no sign of being upset, so she continued.

“You’re here because Arthur said he would be a better lover to me, is that right?” She asked quietly, watching his eyes change. They were unreadable, yet she still felt like she was staring into his very soul.

She looked down for a moment as she said, “Even if that were true, do you believe that I would choose anyone over you? After you were so caring to me, and you almost died in my arms after protecting me? Do you believe I would go back on my promise to stay with you? Because, Theo, since then, I can promise you that I haven’t loved you any less-”

“I found love where it wasn’t supposed to be, ___” He avoided her eyes diligently.” Anyone could be a better lover than me.”

“There hasn’t been a day that I’ve regretted my promises to you. I chose to stay here with you because I love you, Theo. Even if you think someone else could be better, that doesn’t mean you aren't still good enough. So, please, remember that I’ll always choose you.”

She swiped her thumb over his cheek with a tender smile before leaning in close and whispering, “I promise.”

[shijiujun]

History3 Ep 8 Summary - SHAO FEI ADMITS HE LIKES TANG YI

my obsession with tangfei is getting a little ridiculous - i’m writing this as the episode live streams AND OKAY IT JUST ENDED!!!!

*JUST A WARNING GUYS IT’S ONLY 20 MINUTES FOR TODAY’S EPISODE AND WHAT THE HELL THEY KEEP DOING THIS AND ENDING THE SCENE PREMATURELY and today’s was ridiculously short in feel especially - and the scenes just keep changing prematurely as well and the development is a bit too fast? but the good thing is the plot actually moved in terms of everyone’s relationships and also the bad guy’s plots - which we haven’t seen much of until now

i have no idea, let me know when you guys watch it and have any theories! i’ll explain some of mine later below!

also an update on the chinese audience again - they’ve totally adopted shao fei as their son it’s hilarious some of the golden comments translated are (they mean their comments lovingly despite the exclamation marks LOLOL):

“DON’T HURT MY SON!”

“LET GO OF MY SON”

“TANG YI YOU LITTLE SHIT” 

“I’M GOING TO TAKE MY SON AWAY FROM YOU!”

“tang yi hasn’t apologised, i won’t be taken in by his gentleness!”

SUMMARY FOR THIS WEEK:

HAHAHAHAHA omg wow this episode is packing a punch seriously it starts off with SHAO FEI’S MANY LUGGAGES AT TANG YI’S HOUSE declaring his intention to stay

tang yi’s reaction: he stares at shao fei as he ALWAYS DOES, as if he’s wondering how this human being ever came into existence you know? and then he says: “i’ll never allow having a policeman around me 24/7″

bodydumb, ah de: “yeah boss, what would everyone say if they realised that you had a policeman following you around?!”

at this point, shao fei as always seems to be on the losing end but WOW JACK IS HELPING SHAO FEI OUT WTF GOOD JOB JACK - basically he makes the case that if shao fei moved in, they could also keep an eye on him rather than let him keep turning up at inopportune times and disrupting their plans - THIS IS A VALID ARGUMENT

Shao Fei is totally pulling the friend card again to stay at Tang yi’s house this is amazing if i got my way every time I pulled the friend card life would be so much easier - in any case, he brings up the fact that he’s “half a friend” and he’s not a policeman in this case, and friends should help each other out?

Jack is SCHEMING HE IS SCHEMING: we haven’t seen much of his scheming so far, so i’m actually quite excited to see how his covert plans all fall into place - he show shao fei a REALLY REALLY REALLY NICE GUEST ROOM 

and shao fei just moves in and treats the place as his home like he has ZERO SHAME, YOU GO SHAO FEI! OWN IT! he thanks jack for helping him out earlier and jack is all: “it’s alright, i actually need your help.” 

in this case - HELP COULD MEAN 2 THINGS 1. with possibly bodydumb’s alleged betrayal OR 2. with zhao zi OR 3. BOTH!

shao fei calling zhao zi then and asking him to turn up at tang yi’s place to set up a security system or check the existing one - it could be a legit reason i.e. jack knows that zhao zi is good at technology and hacking and what not, and wants him to come and scope the place out, BUT ALSO so he can spend time with zhao zi

the rest of the police team just groans because they’ve got a lot of work to do and with shao fei already stationed with tang yi so they’re one man short, and now they want zhao zi to go over as well? you’ve got to admit that police chief perhaps wanted shao fei out of the picture and OUT OF TROUBLE AS WELL and best case scenario shao fei turns up with some evidence and progress and if not WELL, AT LEAST HE’S OUT OF TROUBLE FOR A SHORT PERIOD THANK GOD HE’S SOMEONE ELSE’S PROBLEM FOR NOW

back at tang yi’s house: hong ye vs. shao fei - who is going to win? OMG hong ye is pulling out ALL THE STOPS she’s so mean - i can understand why but WOW SHE IS SO MEAN AND SHE TOTALLY WON THE ROUND IN A SENSE - she totally provokes shao fei and hits all his buttons by mentioning li zhen jie and insisting that she was a dirty cop, and that shao fei is exactly like her: “it’s no wonder, policemen’s salary is low, they can’t help but be a little greedy” and other things, and we all know how much li zhen meant to shao fei, so he literally TAKES A SINGLE FUCKING STEP AND MOVES TO KIND OF POKE OR GRAB HER-

tang yi comes in at just the right time and grabs him and SHOVES HIM VIOLENTLY backwards and shao fei legit just crashes into the chair behind him: “don’t you dare touch her!”

CAN YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND WHY THE CHINESE AUDIENCE ARE LIKE ANGRY AT TANG YI HAHAHA

anw shao fei is spitting mad, he gets up and goes: “do you know what she said?!”

tang yi: “it doesn’t matter what she said. don’t you dare touch her!”

i expected shao fei to argue, but he’s totally hurt from her comments, and then now that tang yi is indiscriminately shielding her against him - so he just stalks off, the poor bb and just as he leaves, tang yi asks hong ye: “are you okay?”

hong ye: “i’m fine, i was just a bit frightened/startled by him”

cue shao fei’s indignant expression as he hears that and stops by the door, then makes his way outside 

LOOK AT BB SHAO FEI STALKING OFF LIKE AN ANGRY LITTLE DUCK

okay shao fei you need to stop being violent towards other people’s property - he is understandably angry and starts kicking the swing outside in the garden

jack is scheming guys he’s totally scheming - HAHAHAHA is he trying to push shao fei and tang yi together it’s fucking hilarious, but at the same time he’s trying to give him cryptic advice? i love it 

jack: “hong ye is known to have a sharp tongue and for being blunt”

shao fei: *POUTS*

jack considers, then goes: “unless... you’re not mad at hong ye, but at our boss”

in any case, jack dispenses some good advice - that if shao fei keeps acting based on his emotions, everything they’ve worked for will be for naught

KEYCHAIN MAKES IT APPEARANCE! tang yi sees the keychain that shao fei gave him while he’s packing his desk, is reminded of what he did to shao fei (only just?!!!! tang yi how could you) and then looks out of the window to see shao fei in the garden - wow shao fei how many times you going to pace the garden

shao fei talking to himself and psyching himself up AWAY FROM THE HURT HE FEELS FROM TANG YI NOT LISTENING TO HIM: “it’s only natural that he sides hong ye. they’re so close.” - and then he returns to the house just as tang yi comes down the stairs 

they stare at one another, and shao fei is still pissed so he walks AWAY from tang yi, then within like five steps he pivots on his heel and faces tang yi just as tang yi reaches shao fei

tang yi explaining himself to shao fei, I LOVE THIS RELATIONSHIP DEVELOPMENT

anw shao fei opens his mouth and he’s about to say smth but tang yi beats him to the punch and goes: “i know what hong ye said to you. i know what li zhen means to you, and i apologize to you on her behalf”

so shao fei was angry, but because tang yi totally apologised first, he can’t be TOO ANGRY, but he scoffs: “whatever. if the person who said it doesn’t feel sorry for it, then there’s no point for a bystander to apologise”

tang yi: “she is me, and i am her. together the both of us are going to complete what boss tang entrusted to us.”

shao fei: “and this means you can just not listen to me?!!!!”

seeing that shao fei bb is still angry, tang yi does the next best thing - HE GRABS SHAO FEI BY THE ARM AND DRAGS HIM TO THE ROOM HAHAHAHA WE’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SCENE AND IT IS GLORIOUS

SHAO FEI’S CONFUSED FACE AS HE LANDS ON THE BED?!!!! +100000

wow tang yi how hard did you push shao fei with the bruises and tang yi’s SUPER GENTLE TONE as he tells shao fei to “lie down properly” so he can get his back okay seriously TANG YI HOW HARD DID U SHOVE SHAO FEI BB

ahahahahaha shao fei is totally enjoying the treatment, and he’s TOTALLY okay until he remembers what jack told him, that shao fei actually cares more about tang yi’s reaction than hong ye’s harsh words - and that’s when those BIG WIDE EYES OF REALISATION APPEAR - HE IS ATTRACTED TO TANG YI HE FEELS IT

bad guys turn up - chen wen hao is colluding with another person and chen wen hao is looking for detailed information in xing tian meng - the other guy wants to ally themselves with chen wen hao

OMG OKAY MAJOR PLOT DEVELOPMENT AHEAD: so no ones knows tang guo dong and tang yi’s actual relationship, not even chen wen hao or any of the other gangsters that were previously under boss tang in the same gang

apparently tang guo dong just one day turned up with both hong ye and tang yi, but he only changed tang yi’s surname to his, and let hong ye keep her one surname

chen wen hao has no idea what tang yi is to tang guo dong, and basically asks the other plump dude to show some sincerity and get him some REAL info, particularly tang yi’s EVERYTHING, including his past - chen wen hao and the other bad guy seems fixated on this details, so I’M BETTING MY MONEY ON THIS BEING A HUGE PLOT REVEAL POINT

SO THEORY IS: remember those promotional stills that SHOWED tang yi crying in shao fei’s arms? i think there’s something going on with tang yi’s birth (for e.g. he could be boss tang’s real son with li zhen?!!! OR something similar, something that he didn’t know - but it’s a theory, FEEL FREE TO SHARE MORE THEORIES!!!)

FAVOURITE SCENE OF THE EPISODE: CAR SCENE - tang yi is being chauffeured to the company by ah de, and shao fei is sitting right there next to him and totally STARING AT HIM

TANG YI TOTALLY FEELS HIS GAZE AND LOOKS UP AND SHAO FEI LOOKS AWAY AFTER BEING CAUGHT?! SHAO FEI PLEASE

tang yi, exasperated but clearly quite fond of shao fei: “what are you doing?”

and wow shao fei that was a lousy excuse: “oh! just exploring the car features. wow, does this run on electricity? your car is totally luxury-grade” - and then proceeds to press every button near him!!!!! SHAO FEI GET A GRIP!!!

ah de from the front: “alright you country bumpkin, don’t open the roof window, it’s raining.”

shao fei: “who the fuck you calling a country bumpkin?!!!”

and then tang yi WHO IS JUST LOOKING AT SHAO FEI FIDGET AND MOVE AND RUN HIS MOUTH OFF SO, SO FONDLY, WITH SO MUCH PATIENCE, he asks: “really, what are you doing?”

shao fei, another lame answer that is INCONSISTENT WITH HIS PREVIOUS ANSWERS: “nothing. i’m just looking to see if you’ve got some drinks in here.”

TO WHICH, tang yi helpfully opens the compartment between their seats and comes up with idk is that sparkling water? he is about to pass it to shao fei, and then he-

OMGGGGGG TANG YI HE THEN SO HELPFULLY, SO DOTINGLY, OPENS THE BOTTLE FOR SHAO FEI, AND PASSES IT TO HIM

CUE SHAO FEI’S SATISFIED SMILE

they arrive at the company lobby and tang yi moves into the elevator first, then shao fei wants to follow but he can’t because AH DE AKA BODYDUMB IS A COCKBLOCKER - he refuses to let shao fei go in

AND OMGGG ANDY - ANDY with his lazy outfit but looking fine as hell, he turns up and obviously they arranged to meet, tang yi asks him to come in and he does, leaving bodydumb and shao fei fighting outside of the elevator - TANG YI WHERE DID ALL THE GENTLENESS GO?!!

and fucking FINALLY - we get a scene where shao fei properly kicks ass and HERE IT IS GUYS THE PIVOTAL POINT OF THIS 

bodydumb: “don’t think i don’t know what you’re doing! you’re using this as an excuse. i see your eyes when you look at the boss, it disgusts me!”

AND THEY EXCHANGED BLOWS

AND THEN SHAO FEI BABY OVERPOWERS BODYDUMB AND SAYS: “yes, so what if i like tang yi? it’s none of anyone’s business. if you have time to spread rumors about me, you might as well use the time to train your moves!”

YASSSSSS OMG SHAO FEI BB - BURN!

so shao fei bypasses bodydumb who’s lying in pain on the ground, into the lift, and he makes it upstairs (and somehow he knows which floor it’s on?)

anw tang yi and andy are having a meeting - THANK GOD FOR ANDY’S COMPETENCE - he has intel for tang yi, he knows that chen wen hao met someone the night before, and he has found out who attacked and kidnapped him previously

andy slides a piece of paper with maybe a person’s name on it over the table to tang yi, tang yi grabs it, but andy stops him and warns him: “you’re not going to be happy when you find out who it is.”

tang yi is all, okay, but imma do it anyway

he reads it, and THEORY: maybe it’s bodydumb’s name?! - anw he’s super angry and he flings the paper to the ground - we don’t get to see whose name it is, tang yi just keeps repeating that he didn’t think it was him

andy then is all: “awww, don’t be angry, relax” - and he’s so touchy with tang yi ARE YOU SURE YOU GUYS DIDN’T SLEEP TGT BEFORE and massages tang yi’s temples

tang yi is totally into it and he actually relaxes and closes his eyes

which brings me to the point of shao fei being outside the office, and he can see the vague figures of andy and tang yi standing so close to each other

AND THIS IS HILARIOUS - BODYDUMB AKA AH DE arrives, and before he can grab shao fei, shao fei grabs him, silences him and goes: “LET’S GET RID OF OUR COMMON ENEMY FIRST BEFORE SETTLING OUR SHIT” AHAHAHAHAHA BODYDUMB AND SHAO FEI ARE NOW ALLIES BECAUSE THEY ARE JELLY OF ANDY? 

and then they just end it there we don’t get the scene where shao fei bursts in and interrupts whatever they were doing

some thoughts:

when is the exact OMG moment when shao fei realises he likes tang yi? i think he realises he’s attracted to him during the massage scene, but how did that go to declaring that he likes tang yi to bodydumb?

tang yi why you keep blowing hot and cold?!

“common enemy” i.e. andy - does shao fei know that bodydumb likes tang yi? this still hasn’t been really confirmed, and how did shao fei know?!

I LOVE GENTLE TANG YI TO SHAO FEI - BOTTLE OPENING SCENE IS A TREASURE

tang yi’s background - any theories on this?

[bloodraven55]

Ask game: Blake - apologies

OOF. You picked a good (and very emotional) one for my first crack at this ask game thing, anon, but thank you very much for sending one!

Boy, do I have some feelings about Blake and apologies. I’m going to put the rest of this under the cut, though, because it got long.

We can see in the show that Blake apologises a lot. She tells Yang twice that she’s “so sorry” after Adam cuts Yang’s arm off even though Yang’s unconscious and unable to hear it. She apologises to Ghira in V4 for what she sees as abandoning him and Kali by staying in the White Fang, and also the way she left, saying that she “should have listened” to them and again apologising not once but twice; “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” And in the finale of V6 she starts to say that she’s sorry for being unable to disable the comm tower before Yang stops her and tells her it wasn’t her fault.

Finally, in the Adam character short she apologises to Adam for making him feel like she doesn’t believe in him. (Or rather, he gaslights her and manipulates her to dismiss her genuine concerns about innocent people’s deaths until she is the one saying sorry instead of him.)

The common theme in all these examples is that Blake is saying sorry for something that wasn’t a direct result of her actions. Adam was the one who chose to cut Yang’s arm off, but Blake is the one apologising. Adam is the one who stalked her and attacked her entirely unprovoked so that she could disable the comm tower, but Blake is the one apologising. Adam is the one who killed innocent civilians/let innocent civilians die on missions, but Blake is the one apologising.

The only one where Blake is actually saying sorry for her own actions is when she apologises for leaving her parents, but even then the context of the apology makes it something she shouldn’t have had to say sorry for. She left home because she wanted to help the Faunus–to do the right thing–and almost certainly because Adam had been grooming her and indoctrinating her into his own radical ideals. She was still almost a child and she couldn’t have understood the nuances of the decision she was making. Basically, while that choice was hers, it was influenced by far more than just her own thoughts and feelings, and so full responsibility can’t be placed on her for the consequences.

There are a couple of points I’m trying to make here. First, apologies have mostly been a very unhealthy thing for Blake as she very often says sorry for things that were in no way (or at the very least, not completely) her fault. Second, she has been conditioned to believe that she is responsible for everything that goes wrong around her to the point where her instinctive reaction is to apologise even when what happened was wholly someone else’s responsibility.

This is why I loved so much that she never apologises to Yang for leaving after the Fall of Beacon. Because not only would that have implied that Blake was partially at fault for Adam’s actions, but it would have been perpetuating a habit Blake has that isn’t at all healthy.

Not to mention that it probably meant far more to Yang, whose greatest fear is being left behind again by someone she loves, that Blake promised to stay than it would have if Blake had simply said sorry for leaving.

I am in no way saying that Blake doesn’t mean it when she says sorry–she absolutely does–but she’s spent so long apologising for things she never should have had to that I think it’s good that she’s being encouraged to stop saying it so often. The fact that she’s learned to automatically say sorry even when she bears no fault means that even when she is apologising for a genuine mistake on her part she isn’t doing it just as an acknowledgement of culpability and a request for forgiveness the way most people who haven’t been victims of abuse are. She’s also doing it because she’s afraid that if she doesn’t then she will be blamed or punished for whatever she’s apologising for.

I just remembered that this was meant to be my headcanons rather than a character analysis, but I hope what I wrote lived up to your expectations. I guess if I did have a headcanon to do with Blake and apologies, it would just be that–as the show is already sort of establishing–she learns to apologise in a more healthy way, and that promises rather than apologies kind of become more her way of expressing her commitment to people.

Anyway, Blake Belladonna deserves all the love in the world and I admire her bravery so much. She’s truly one of the most courageous characters I’ve seen in any show to be honest. (I am a firm believer that if Blake did her word association thing for herself–or rather, if someone else did it for her–then her word would be bravery or courage.)

That became much more lengthy than I expected, but it was an excellent and though-provoking ask, so thank you again for sending it!

(Just want to note as well: I have no personal experience with abuse of any kind. I based my thoughts here off my own reading of the show and various comments I have read from those who have actually been victims of abuse regarding both Blake’s arc and situations not related to RWBY. Therefore, I very much hope that I didn’t misrepresent anything or get anything wrong with respect to that aspect, but if I did please (politely) let me know because I am always eager to learn more and better myself as a person.)

If you made it to the end, then thanks for reading and I hope you found my rambling interesting!

[cherry-kirsch]

and there was an empty seat where you should be

banjo/misora || 2429 words || sfw || hurt/comfort

Sento hasn't come home in a while.

Misora finds comfort and a home in Banjou's arms. One day, he'll leave her too.

[ AO3 ]

Misora has gotten used to falling asleep to the sound of Banjou's breathing.

It's warm, against the back of her neck, even and comforting, like the arms curling around her waist, pulling her close to his body. Like he's afraid she'll get up and leave him to sleep alone one day. Like he's afraid of letting go. Sometimes, his breathing picks up and he wakes up crying into the back of her night dress— and Misora wakes and wipes his tears away with her thumbs, whispers soothing words and strokes his hair until he hiccups himself back to sleep and buries his face into her. Other times, it remains shaky and awake, and he plays with her hair and sings to her softly until she falls asleep, and, when she wakes she knows he hadn't slept at all.

Most times, neither of them sleep. They stay awake and worried, plagued with memories they want rid off.

People leave.

Sento hasn't come home in days.

It was an argument between him and Banjou, and Misora wished she had interjected, tried to get them both to calm down; but Sento stormed away and it was her, Banjou and Sawa until Sawa left as well. And then it was just her and Banjou, how it always seemed to end up these days, and Misora didn't eat that night no matter how much Banjou tried to tempt her. She crawled into bed, fall asleep and called out Sento's name when she woke up sobbing, her arms reaching for his familiar form. They found the unfamiliar weight of someone else, recoiled, and she cried Sento's name again until the increasingly familiar arms gathered her up in them and held her close, rocking her gently against him as she sobbed and clutched to the front of his shirt. When she calmed down, she pulled him into bed with her, held him tight against her like a stuffed toy and listened to his heartbeat— she didn't wake up crying anymore, and, when she sleeps, she sleeps through the night.

So, why is she awake now?

Her eyes are bleary and filled with the haze of sleep, and she blinks through it, sits up and looks around the room, pats around the bed for Banjou's body, finding only faint warmth, and she starts to panic.

His clothes aren't folded at the end of the bed. She gets up and pads to the winding staircase.

The Sclash Driver is gone. Her feet chill on the cold metal steps.

"Banjou?" Misora asks quietly and Banjou starts from his place by the front door, but doesn't turn to her. "Where are you going?"

Banjou makes a small noise. "To find Sento." He says. "I'm going to end this war."

"You can't do it on your own." She tells him and Banjou growls lowly.

"Well, I sure as hell can try."

She thinks. "You don't know where he is," she says. "He could be anywhere."

Banjou shoves his feet into his shoes. "Then I'll find him and we'll go together." he replies.

Misora presses her lips into a thin line and walks around the counter, because she doesn't want to be behind that counter again, or alone in the basement. She never wants to be alone again. "You'll get yourself killed." She says and when Banjou shrugs her heart drops.

"If that what it takes to end all of this." Banjou says, he gives her a half-wave. "I'm leaving now."

She crosses the room in five quick strides and catches the sleeve of his jacket before he can storm off to wherever he wants to go. He looks down at her with no intention of shaking her off, and she meets his eyes defiantly. "You can't." She says, and it comes out bratty and entitled, despite how hard she tried to make it not sound like that. "You can't go like this."

"Like what?" He asks.

"Angry." She says.

Banjou scowls down at her. "I'm not angry." He tells her, finally moves a hand to try and pry her vice like grip from the silk sleeve of his bomber jacket. She holds tight and he growls, frustrated, and gives up.

Misora eyes him carefully. "Yes, you are." She tells him.

"I'm not." Banjou insists, eyebrow twitching.

She scowls right back at him and tightens her grip on his jacket, follows him as he takes a step back towards the door. "You are." She insists. "Just look at you. There's steam practically overflowing from your ears."

"I'm not in the mood, Misora." Banjou says through grit teeth, clenching his hands into fists and closing his eyes before he finally manages to pull her hand from his jacket. "Just leave it. Leave me alone."

"And I'm not in the mood either, Ryuuga." Misora quips back. "You're acting like you don't matter. You're acting like you want to be alone."

Banjou's eyes snap open and he glares furiously down at her. "I do want to be alone." He says lowly, dangerously. "I want to be alone. I don't want to be around you anymore. So just leave it, okay? Leave me alone and go away."

Misora pretends like the words don't hurt her, make her heart ache, and glares back at him. "There you go again," she says, throwing her hands in the air. "Saying things you don't mean because you're angry and you've lost your head in it. You're like a headless chicken."

Banjou roars at her, takes a clenched fist and slams it into the wall next to him as Misora flinches, eyes the blue fire and electricity surrounding his fist because of the Dragon Fullbottle clutched in it carefully. "Just shut up!" He screams at her, and when he takes a step towards her, she steps back. Fear clawing up her throat to stop the words coming it out as he backs her up against a table, gets so close that she can feel the warmth of his breath fanning her cheek. "Are you happy now? Are you satisfied?" He asks her, and while her mouth opens to reply to say, 'No, no, I'm not.', nothing passes from her lips but shallow gasps. "Is this what you wanted?"

Misora tries to speak, and swallows down her words. She turns her head to her feet. "H-How..." She begins, her mouth dry. "How could you ask me something like that?" She finally manages, the words nothing but a whisper.

"Because you did this to me." He says.

And, Ouch, that hurt. The words scald her like she's just spilt hot tea on her arms, pierce her skin like a knife that just keeps on digging into her flesh.

"You did this to yourself." Misora says.

The room falls silent and, slowly, Misora looks up. Banjou looks furious, his mouth open and eyes filled with a fire that's purely meant to burn her in the end; and she knows that she's made a mistake.

"Do you think I wanted this?" He asks slowly, his voice dangerously low, but Misora doesn't think that he wants her to answer him. "Do you think I wanted to be caught up in this freaking messed up game of cat and mouse? Do you think I want to fight again after what happened to Kasumi? Do you think I enjoy doing this?" His voice is steadily increasing in volume and Misora take in a shaky breath. "Beacause, newsflash- I don't! This isn't enjoyable for me, in fact, the last thing I want to be doing right now is going to fight a needless war. I didn't ask to be experimented on; I didn't ask for this, Misora!"

"I didn't ask for this either, Banjou!" Misora screams right back and Banjou stops, his chest heaving, to stare at her as she chokes back tears. "I didn't ask for this power. For my father to leave me-- if he's even my real father. I didn't ask to be left, to live a life of refuge inside a stuffy basement where all I'm good for is purifying bottles that always end up falling into the wrong hands. I didn't ask for this. I don't want it." She stands up straighter and jabs Banjou in the middle of his chest, pushing him backwards a few inches. "I didn't ask to be Faust's disposables either."

Misora stares at him a moment longer, her bottom lip wobbling before she draws in a breath and begins to sob into her hands. Taking a step back when Banjou moves towards her.

He stops, his arms outstretched and stays like that for a minute, watching Misora's sobs quiet into sniffs and gasps before he allows them to go limp at his sides. "Are you afraid?" He asks and Misora nods. "What of?"

"You." Misora says into her hands and Banjou goes silent. "You're scary when you get angry."

"I'd never hurt you." He says.

Misora sniffs. "I know."

"I'm sorry." Banjou tells her.

She dries her eyes with her sleeve. "I provoked you." She says. "Don't apologise."

"I made you cry."

"You're not the only one who's made me cry." She says and she meets Banjou's eyes with a wobbly smile.

Banjou shuffles a little on his feet, quickly avoids her gaze. "I still feel bad."

Misora shakes her head again and Banjou goes quiet, his hands clenching and unclenching periodically, as if he's waiting for something to grab and hold on to before he takes several wide steps away from her. Suddenly, the distance and silence between them feels too wide, like an ocean that they can't quite row across and Misora's heart sinks in her chest, guilt squeezing at her chest as she wraps her arms around herself, takes a hesitant half-step in Banjou's direction.

"Do you mean it?" She asks and Banjou looks up, curious. "Do you mean what you said?"

Banjou raises an eyebrow. "About what?" he asks. The words suddenly feel too big and she struggles, kicks the floor with the toe of her slipper. "You can ask me, y'know? I'm not going to bite." He says and that's the thing; Misora's afraid that he is. That he'll find her worries stupid and the answers to them obvious, that he'll see this side of her instead of the one he's used to and decide that she's not the girl he wants anymore.

"That..." She begins, and she can't meet his eye so she looks down at the floor. "That you don't want to be around me anymore. That you want to be alone."

"Of course I didn't mean it." Banjou says with a small sigh. "I don't mean a lot of things I say. I'm sorry, that must've hurt you."

Misora shakes her head, clutches herself a little tighter. "It's fine."

It isn't.

"No, it isn't." Banjou says.

Shit.

Carefully, Banjou steps towards her, his arms outstretched for her, pausing every time she shuffles backwards a little. "I'm sorry." He says again and then he hesitates. "Can I hold you?"

Misora peers up at him, bites her lips and takes tiny steps towards his outstretched arms until he's directly in front of him, their toes almost touching. Then she sighs and leans forward to hug Banjou around the middle, resting her forehead on the middle of his chest as his arms reach around to tug her closer to his body, pulling her flush against him. She sniffs, feels everything bubbling up to the surface again and gasps twice before she turns and starts crying into his shirt. Banjou lifts a hand from around her to stroke her hair softly, pressing gentle kisses to the top of her head.

By the time she peels herself from him, her face is red, blotchy and stiff, and it's all she can do to sniff and choke out tearless sobs into the air as she rests her chin on Banjou's shoulder, allowing him to brush her hair from her face and kiss her cheek.

"I'm sorry." She whispers.

Banjou hums softly and strokes her hair, pulls back to push it from her cheeks. "Why?" He asks.

"For being like this." Misora says, and her voice doesn't sound like her own. "For crying on you. For being scared."

"We all get scared." He tells her.

Misora pushes herself away from him, clutches tighter at herself. "You can go now." She says, and it breaks her heart to say it. "I know you want to."

Banjou looks between the door and her. "Sento can wait until the morning," He tells her and he steps towards her to cup her face gently in his hands. "I don't want to leave you. I shouldn't leave you."

"'Want' and 'Shouldn't' are two very different things." She says, hardly stopping herself from leaning into him. "Which do you mean?"

He thinks for a moment before he pushes her fringe back from her forehead and press a kiss there. "Want." he mumbles against her skin. "I don't want to leave you."

But he will some day.

Misora pulls back to rest her forehead against Banjou's, syncing her breathing to his in an effort to calm herself down. "Okay." She says, trying to force herself to believe it.

"Come on," he says gently, lacing his fingers with hers. "Lets go to bed."

That night, she finds a home in Banjou's arms. One that is not the same four walls of the basement and the cafe above her, but one that holds her so carefully and warmly, fills her with the same comfort she feels around Sento and how she used to feel around Soichi. She dreams that she's lying in a field of beautiful flowers, and only realises that there's someone with her when the warm weight in her hand moves it's fingers to pluck a flower from beside them, tuck it in her hair. When she wakes, she feels content and happy, despite the empty spot on the bed next to her.

A can of coffee greets her when she goes up into the cafe, and she sits and drinks it alone, two empty seats either side of her.

People may leave.

The door behind her opens and Banjou steps through with a firm grip of Sento's sweater. Misora leaps from her seat to embrace them both in a hug, feeling warm when their arms curl around, tug her so close that she won't be able to escape from them until they decide that it's time to let her go. It feels nice. It feels like home.

But the best people always come back.

[the-tevinter-biscuit]

Fenris/Ariel - Reading Lesson

A writing commission for @maiden-of-wolves! 

my commission prices are as listed here!

As much as she appreciated the help, Ariel couldn’t help but feel the heat of embarrassment in her cheeks whenever she sat down for her usual reading lesson. Fenris was careful and attentive with her, knowing the difficulties of learning to read first-hand, and for that she was grateful. Regardless, there was something so inherently shameful about not being able to do such a basic task, even if Fenris held no judgement.

They sat together in a cosy nook in Skyhold’s library, a pile of books on the desk in front of them. Ariel took a couple of quiet, deep breaths as she steadied herself to focus on the first book that Fenris pulled from the pile. Neither of them took much notice of the front cover, flicking it open to the page that was bookmarked and presumably where they had left off last time. Fenris removed the bookmark and tilted the book towards Ariel.

“Are you ready to start?” he asked, pointing to the first word of the page. His eyes were trained on her rather than the book. As he much as he was happy to help, it was always a delight to watch her flounder and fluster over the words. In moments of frustration she was undeniably cute, not that it was something Fenris would ever admit to himself.

Ariel took one last deep inhale before speaking; “It took…El... Elle? Ele-na, some time… be-fore she could…bring herself to slip out of the…robe. En…tire. Entirely. She… str…straddled Tomas, her hair loose and hang…ing in front of her eyes. He had to push his…his an…an…sss…Fuck.”

“Anxiety,” Fenris said, momentarily drawing his eyes away from her furrowed eyebrows to look at the page. Strange. He couldn’t remember these characters from their last session. They hadn’t skipped a page, had they? “You’re doing good you know.”

“Well that’s stupid. Why has it got an x in it? That doesn’t make any damn sense,” she huffed, already frustrated with today’s work. She’d been doing so well lately, but she supposed all good things had to come to an end eventually. Fenris chuckled next to her. At least, someone found some humour in it all.

He nudged her lightly; “Keep going.”

“He had to push his anxiety away. It would be…easy… easier for him to get up and… take care of an…e… emer-gen-cy. Emergency. If she weren’t o-on top of him. He had to for-get about that. Kiss me, he thought, be-cause she wasn’t… going to, he knew. She light…lightly bit his… sho…shoulder. She was… lower-ing her-self more. She was brushing her…” Ariel’s words trailed off, her face heating up at the sight of the next few words. Maker, what was this book? “Brushing her…br…breasts across h-his face. Tomas drove him-self…into…her…S-She was…wine…whining with—Andraste, Fenris. Did you…Did you pick this?”

When she turned to look at him, his face had melted into a beautiful shade of red. He quickly snatched the book out from under her hands, skimming through some of the pages before turning it back to its front cover and read the title. It wasn’t one he recognised, but that was very clearly his bookmark trapped inside it.

“No. I didn’t. I would never…Ariel, this isn’t my book,” Fenris stressed but Ariel, who had also turned a few shades of pink, looked unconvinced. “I am serious. Our reading material must have been tampered with.”

“I want to believe you Fenris, I do. But how could I know that this wasn’t some kind of…” she replied, gesturing wildly to the stack of books on the desk and clearly struggling to get her words out. “Vulgar game. Making me say such…such things.”

Fenris only frowned at her, getting up from his seat. It was undeniable that hearing her say those dirty things had made his heart race, his body stirring with light arousal, but he wouldn’t ever provoke such a thing like that from her. He had spent so much time repressing feelings he figured she didn’t share, he wouldn’t let things spiral into a direction that would end up bad for both of them. Without another moment’s hesitation, he closed the book they’d been reading and tucked it under his arm.

“I wouldn’t do that. But perhaps this is just a sign that we should stop,” Fenris said firmly. Before Ariel could get another word in, he disappeared from the library red-faced.

 When Ariel returned to the nook in the library for their next reading lesson, Fenris was nowhere to be seen. It was unlike him to be late, he was usually very punctual with these things. Something was definitely amiss. Ariel decided to give him more time, resting her chin on her hand propped up on the desk. Eventually she grew tired of waiting and decided to go looking for him.

Asking around, no one seemed to have seen him all day. Did this have something to do with their last session? Perhaps he thought that she was accusing him negatively when it came to that steamy book that had been left on their desk. The truth was if Fenris had chosen to play a vulgar game with her, she wouldn’t have minded in the slightest. Fenris was kind and respectful, even though they didn’t always agree, and most definitely incredibly handsome. A small part of her had been hoping that this was his way of trying to flirt with her.

“Enjoy your reading session?” Dorian asked her when she walked past. Ariel took a few steps back so she could turn to look at him. A bemused smirk played on his lips, only bringing a slight blush to Ariel’s face. He knew about the book, didn’t he? How could he have—Oh. It all made sense now. All of this was just one big misunderstanding. He’d accused Fenris of dirty things when all along it was just a foolish prank. Dorian chuckled at her expression. “Oh don’t look at me like that. You two needed to get it all out. You don’t think everybody knows the way you two look at each other?”

Ariel balked at the comment. Was it…that obvious that she liked him? No, wait, he’d referred to both of them. It couldn’t be true that Fenris felt the same way, could it? There were many questions that needed to be answered but more importantly, now it was clear that she desperately needed to apologise to him.

“Have you seen him?” she asked, shrugging off the comment. Dorian raised an eyebrow.

“No, not today,” he said but before he could get out a follow-up question, Ariel strode out of the room. She needed to find him and soon. He couldn’t have gone far, it’s not like he was going to leave Skyhold or something over this, right?

In the end, she found him on the ramparts, gazing over Skyhold. She’d recognise that white hair anywhere.

“Fenris?” she called out to him. Fenris turned slowly, lifting himself up from the bricks and settling his eyes on her. His expression was hard to read, she couldn’t quite tell if he was mad at her or not. It wasn’t like they’d never fought before but this…this was a bit different. Her heart hammered in her chest. “You didn’t…come for my reading lesson today.”

“I didn’t think you’d want me,” Fenris replied, eyes shifting away from her.

The sorrowful look on his face made a surge of guilt pool in Ariel’s stomach. He deserved so much better than the way she’d spoken to him.

“No it’s not like that at all. I’m sorry for…accusing you of picking out that book. Dorian told me it was him. To be honest I was just hoping that you might’ve…” her words trailed off, realising how much of her mind she was just about to speak. She couldn’t tell him that she was hoping that he was flirting with her, that could ruin their entire relationship. What if he didn’t feel the same way? It didn’t matter what Dorian had said. If he felt too awkward with her then she’d have to find a new teacher and it could ruin a perfectly good friendship. This was all such a mess.

However, Fenris’s gaze returned to her at the words and he cocked an eyebrow in interest. He took a couple steps closer to her.

“Might’ve what?” he said. Ariel’s blush darkened. He was so much more handsome up close. She could see every small movement, the way his strong jaw clenched, dark eyebrows slightly furrowed, white hair framing his face. Though it all paled in comparison to those deep green eyes. Ariel swallowed roughly. Well, here goes nothing.

“This might’ve been your way of…flirting with me,” she stammered.

Fenris’s gaze softened. His hand was shaky, but it reached out to lightly cup her cheek, making her breath hitch. She melted into the way his thumb rubbed against her cheekbone but couldn’t wash away the anxiety of what he was going to say next.

“Here I thought I’d ruined everything,” Fenris confessed. He took a long, deep breath and inched a little closer again. “If I had known that was the way you’d have liked me to flirt with you, I’d have done it earlier. Though, something less vulgar perhaps.”

“Does that mean you are flirting with me? Because I don’t mind. Really. In fact, I’d like it if you did,” she replied, her words falling out rapidly before her mind could catch up.

Fenris chuckled; “Yes. I am.”

There was a brief moment of silence as the two of them stood there, staring into each other’s eyes fondly. Ariel’s eyes flickered down to his lips, something he took note of, letting them curl into a smirk. It was only seconds after that their lips brushed together, capturing each other in a heated kiss. Months of pent up desire flooding out in a storm of passion. Ariel wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, pulling his body flush against hers so she could deepen the kiss. His tongue flicked against her bottom lip, teeth nipping at it lightly as all the unresolved sexual tension met its finality. They had spent so much time waiting for this moment, this opportunity to hold each other like this. When they finally pulled away, both of them were left breathless.

“Was that okay?” Fenris asked, licking his own lips to savour the taste of her. Ariel’s knees went weak at the gesture.

“Yeah,” she replied, quickly catching her breath. It was more than okay, it was one of the most enchanting experiences of her life. Her head was dizzy, mind spinning and reeling as it tried to process what had just happened. She desperately craved more of it, to have Fenris again. No alcohol in the world could compete with how intoxicating he was. Her fingers slipped down into the collar of his shirt, and she yanked him towards her for another kiss.

It wasn’t as feverish as the last, but still filled with hunger. It was worth the wait. Fenris backed her up against one of the walls, fingers grasping at her waist, eagerly drinking in more and more of her. He was surprised to find that she was actually rather aggressive when it came to this, but it only served to arouse him further. Memories of the book were far from his mind as he cherished each peppered kiss.

“Fenris,” she rasped, pulling away once more. She hardly wanted to be away from his lips for more than a second but she knew that if things were to carry on this, they were best to take it away from the public eye. He looked at her questioningly. “If we are to continue…perhaps, we are better locating to my quarters?”

Fenris stared at her in disbelief for a moment, a flush building in his own cheeks as the realisation of her words struck him. He quickly cleared his throat and grabbed her by the hand.

“Certainly,” he said, flashing her a coy smirk as he tugged her to a place they wouldn’t be disturbed.