#she wants me to read this ex gay book and i said no

[poorunforsakensoul]

honestly,, considering it character development when my church leader counselor ex-gay conversion therapy mentor lady can call me and I don’t have a massive breakdown despite it being the most ostracized and hurt I’ve ever felt after a conversation with her

[thelaurenshippen]

re: that *chef kiss* PERFECT Franken-Drummer post and tumblr not being all over The Expanse, I know right?? it’s such an amazing show with so many delightful, complicated characters yet it’s so unfairly slept on! maybe because S1 takes awhile to get going and ppl give up? idk but it makes me sad that I have so few ppl to squeal about Drummer and Amos and Bobbie and Christjen and Ashford and Naomi (ad infinitum) with 😭🚀😭

WHY ARE PEOPLE NOT OBSESSED WITH THE EXPANSE HELLO!?!?! there's literally so much to love about it oh my god. you're right, it DOES take a second to get going but once it does!!!

for those of you who have not read or seen The Expanse series (I myself have yet to read the books), let me tell you why you'll love it:

political space drama with incredibly distinct cultures and phenomenal world building, if you're a details girlie (gn), you're gonna go nuts

the found family vibes!!??! are off!?!? the charts!?!? (minor spoilers for the first few episodes) four people are thrown into a situation in which they accidentally become the most important people/fugitives in the whole galaxy and most of them DO NOT trust each other, what could possible go wrong, and even better, what could possibly go RIGHT

Christjen Avasarala. you are not ready for her. most powerful mover-shaker on earth with the most incredible outfits you've ever seen, refined elegance with the filthiest mouth, plus she's got a classic "whatever those two have going on is so gay it veers into something else entirely" with her younger protective knight lady, Bobbie

Bobbie. the "not to be a lesbian but oh my god" post is made for her. we meet her in the show for the first time when she arm wrestles a robot and WINS. you will be begging for her to step on you with her mech suit

speaking of women I want to step on me Camina Drummer. angry revolutionary pirate queen of my heart. do you miss the unique agony of 2000/10s queerbaiting but want it to be not baiting somehow? this show does that, idk how else to explain it. the most agonizing sapphic pining you've ever seen but it's textual and also not painful because its gay. don't worry, Camina fucks, just not the girl she wants most (also spoilers, but this is not a bury your gays show don't worry)

Jim Holden is literally just Some Guy who becomes the special fantasy chosen one because he simply cannot stop Getting Involved. nosiest bitch in the universe, I love him.

imagine you're a girl who leaves your shitty ex and gets a normal industrial job on a spaceship, only to have a six foot, two hundred pound killer dressed as a mechanic imprint on you like a baby duck, and its unclear whether he wants to fuck you or call you a little sister but he definitely WILL kill for you and will do literally anything you say and then you both end up caught up in a weird galactic war by mistake and there's this other guy with a captain america level moral compass and he's cute and you're into him except your shitty ex is still out there with the biggest secret you have and meanwhile your best female friend is the coolest person you've ever met but you don't think you can be what she needs and you're holding your family together, you're holding the universe together and all you want is justice for your people but unfortunately you've gone and fallen in love with the accidental most important man in the galaxy. well, every day Naomi Nagata wakes up

Praxideke Meng. botanist of my heart. literally tames the rabid guard dog that no one else could. gentle and able to stay gentle because of said dog. which brings me to...

Amos Burton. I saved him for last because he is my guy. he is THAT guy. canonically aromantic pansexual king. are you into guard dog characters? do you find yourself drawn to the "sorry my love language is acts of service and all I'm good at is killing people" characters? amos burton is like seventeen tumblr posts come to life. previously mentioned enormous killer dressed as a mechanic, former heels wearing "I didn't always work in space" sex worker who is always rolling into brothels and being like "you guys unionized?", gives a shit about basically no one in the universe except his crew and every single child in the galaxy, accidental comedian because he cannot stop saying weird shit, not a nice or good person but a loyal one, and one who is always trying to relearn the empathy that was carved out of him as a young person. every time he goes homicidal to protect one of his chosen people (crew + any and every child), an angel gets its wings.

fin.

[fierceawakening]

So this post is going to be a bit rough and rambly but… I don’t know how we put this genie back in the box.

Do any of you remember when I’d freshly left the abusive relationship I was in and I read VORACIOUSLY, trying to figure out how I’d been taken in by such an awful person? (I vividly remember telling my dad about her saying I’m sure I’m gay because on my previous relationships with men I never thought I was in love, but this was so intense… well. I still wasn’t sure but I wondered if it might be.)

I read stuff like Why Does He Do That? and I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me. I also read things like The Sociopath Next Door and one of Hare’s books on psychopathy. I’m pretty sure my ex just had BPD, and I hasten to say even there that I have known many other people with BPD who I emphatically don’t think would treat me the way she did. I was trying to make sense of her, not trying to condemn anyone with a label I don’t have. (There are prosocial psychopaths, too.)

Mostly I was trying to make sense of her lack of remorse. She presented it as sexy and exciting—oh no, I don’t ever worry about taking kink too far, I don’t care what people think of me, I never give someone who wronged me a second chance.

I now see these as huge red flags and worried about them even then, but I tend to be someone who obsesses over whether I’m giving people a fair shake, so the idea of getting with her sounded like a fun vacation from scrupulosity.

It was actually “surely the leopard won’t eat MY face,” but I didn’t see it then.

Anyway. Around that time I got into a lot of arguments with people here who felt that putting too much stock into those books was inherently ableist.

The things the books said about lack of empathy, about how someone who lacks empathy treats even close loved ones as objects of use and not as full people, resonated with how I’d been treated by someone who professed to care about me. But it ruffled HARD the feathers of people for whom “lacking empathy” just means “beepy boopy, but not uncaring.” I have no solution to this—I think they’re two different phenomena that unfortunately have the same name (on tumblr. Not sure they do offline.)

Any double way. One thing I kept coming across in that research was the specter of the sociopathic leader. A charismatic public figure who charms a whole community or nation, and once they do that, rule with an iron fist.

The appeal was eerily similar to why I’d latched on to such a gross girlfriend. “Don’t you ever just want to go ape shitt,” basically. What if you don’t have to care? What if you get to put yourself, your family, your tribe, America First?

Doesn’t that take a load off your mind?

Those weird leftists who don’t understand God or gender or American exceptionalism… what if you don’t have to understand them anyway?

What if all you have to do is win?

My books said THAT is why we should continue to think of sociopathy as bad and people who have it as predators. Not because human rights stop mattering if someone isn’t neurotypical but because the attitude is infectious.

A person who thinks that way by default, if they’re charismatic (and many are), can EASILY get someone who doesn’t think that way to start wondering why they bother with perspective taking and empathy and remorse anyway.

Dehumanization is a virus, and people like that are carriers. The more power they have in a society, the more virulent the strain.

Do most people eventually snap out of it? I mean I’d better think so, my sister in law is German.

But how long does it take?

That I don’t know. And that’s what makes me think Trump might win.

And why I continue to think fighting ableism is important but ALSO to think acting like empathy is superfluous is playing with fire.

[is-the-fire-real]

judío por elección (part 2)

(part 1.)

My wife and I started searching for a community after a lot of talking. But, technically, we were already looking.

After E died, S gave us charge over a specific set of books. He had told her that it was vital these books go to a synagogue. He preferred it to be a London synagogue. We had no clue which one.

Shoved in with all the different books he had, and we inherited, was ephemera from different synagogues--pamphlets from the 1980s and 1990s, booklets from the '40s and '50s. We started calling and emailing them about these books, because they were pretty important.

They're chumash with a publication date of 1898.

Problem was, we couldn't get any synagogues to respond. The one who finally did said that they had too many books and could not accept any more. They suggested that E might still be honored if the chumash went to a Spanish synagogue.

The community here, as you can imagine, is struggling. Spain has done a real good job at keeping Jews out since the expulsion of 1492. Most groups operate in half-secret: no website, or a website that hasn't been updated in years; no phone numbers. Half of the people we tried to contact never responded. Most of the rest couldn't support our conversion.

One rabbi from Madrid answered us. She made it clear that we'd have to move if we wanted to attend her group. This was expected and crushing. We're poor, disabled, and pretty well stuck where we are. But then she said that there was a brand-new community in a city closer to us, one we visit with some frequency. She introduced us to their leader.

I have the impression that A would be considered a cantor. He is not a rabbi, but he can lead services. He had a few questions about my wife and I's histories and experiences with Judaism. (Those experiences I'll talk about somewhat, but it's difficult to talk about meaningfully while also maintaining privacy, so it'll have to wait.) He wanted to know if and what we were reading. Then he invited us to Shabbat, which they conduct through videocalls.

This group does not have a rabbi, much less a synagogue. Several of the folks who call in for our Shabbat meeting live in a different city entirely. That person talks about experiences with Mossad. I want to get better at Spanish so that I can learn from her.

There's singing (as someone who's seen Ashkenazi services, the Sephardi tradition sounds amazing), of course, and because there's so few of us, A has my wife and I read sometimes for services. The very first thing I got to read was Psalm 23, which has always been one of my favorite works of art... which A couldn't know when he asked me to read it.

I said I'd stumble at lot. He told me to read it slowly in Spanish, that it's better to read slow and correctly than quickly and clumsily. He seemed pleased with my effort.

I was raised Mormon, and the entire approach to worship was very different, in a way I found appealing. My wife said it wasn't that different for them--they were raised mainstream Protestant, so singing and standing/sitting a lot were normal for them.

When we were asked to raise a glass of alcohol, we asked if it had to be wine. (We're bad Spaniards. Neither of us likes the stuff.) A said that as long as it was fermented, it was fine. One attendant had a gin and tonic.

The last time we celebrated Shabbat, we used gay-pride themed glasses and filled them with beer. "¿Qué tenéis?" we were asked.

"¡Cerveza!", which cracked them all up, and the ex-Mossad member talked about how the Orthodox she used to worship with would drink whiskey.

Setting aside the Shabbat has been, overall, easier than I thought it would be. I check HebCal to make sure when the candles should be lit. I do all my household chores throughout Thursday and Friday-daytime. My wife tries to cook as much as possible before the candles are lit, and we eat, talk, and do our video-call service with the community.

Saturday I set aside. I have to keep reminding myself not to work, to consider things done even if they look like they're not.

But onward.

Our little community is fantastic, particularly A. He found out I'm having problems with some of my IDs. He told us not to worry. He knows a lot of people who work immigration and he can help us go to the right office and navigate the Spanish bureaucracy. ("Byzantine" should be replaced with "Spanish".) He's answered all our questions and invited us to events about the Shoah and personally introduced us to people.

They were so welcoming, so open, so not-rejecting-us-three-times (but if you count all the rabbis who told us no, technically, that's more than three) that it shocked my wife and I. We talked beforehand about how the community might want to withdraw, and not trust new converts, given October 7. We found the opposite. Our local Jews seem to feel that our willingness to look at how the world is behaving right now and still say "Your people will be my people" demonstrates our sincerity in and of itself.

On the other hand, when we first met A in person, my wife made a comment regarding his personal safety. He admitted that there was a man in the room with us who's his armed bodyguard. He and his wife do not leave home on business related to the community without their bodyguard.

My wife felt a cold hand creep up their back when they heard that. I was not nearby--I was checking all the exits of the auditorium and calculating where we'd need to sit if we had to flee. There were "pro-Palestinian" protests going on that day and the odds were there wouldn't be any danger near us, but... but...

Several of A's family members are also converting. We will have to travel halfway across the country to a mikveh. There are many medieval mikvehs in Spain, but to my knowledge, there are only two which are actually in use. My wife says we'll have to do a road trip. I immediately think about how "one Sephardi and four converts go road tripping across a country where one of its favorite dishes was designed as a Fuck You to Jews and Muslims" would be a fucking great novel.

Would be? Will be. And completing this branch of the journey with a journey feels right.

Oh, and my favorite A story: he invited us to spend some time with him and his wife after a community meal. We agreed to attend the meal, but had to leave after. "We have a lot of dogs and cats," my wife said, "we have to return and care for them."

"We'd love to have you," he said, "but it's a mitzvah, taking care of animals. Do that instead."

Afterward, my wife stared at me in wonderment and said: "I don't think I ever heard that once in church."

[wasted-women]

The Trope of the Day is Women in Refrigerators

Welcome to the wasted women tournament, a tournament to figure out what was the worst female character death!

If you don't know, women in refrigerators is a trope originally coined by comic writer Gail Simone in the 90s in response to the death of Alexandra DeWitt in the Green Lantern comics. She had been the Green Lantern Kyle Rayner's girlfriend who had been killed by the villain Major Force and her body stuffed into the refrigerator for Kyle to find. Since then, "fridged" has become a verb to refer to female characters who are senselessly killed in order to the male protagonists sad or angry without much regard to the woman herself. While originally referring specifically to comic books, the terminology has started to spread to any media.

There are typically two ways that women tend to be fridged:

A female character is written specifically to be fridged. The loving mother/older sister or the disposable love interests are both examples of this trope. These characters typically have very little agency or inner-world outside of the male protagonist— their relationship with the male character is essentially their whole role in the story.

A female character who is a character in their own right— they DO have their own inner-world— but then is killed off to affect the male characters or for plot convenience.

With all of that said, here are the rules for for submissions. Please make sure you read them all before you submit.

The submitted character has be a woman. ABSOLUTELY, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES, DO MALE CHARACTERS COUNT.

(Women in refrigerators is a trope about the senseless killing of female characters because they are thought of as more disposable by nature of being female. While some male characters are killed off for problematic reasons—see bury your gays or the black guy dies first tropes—this blog isn't about them. However, feel free to combine tropes by submitting queer women or women of color, as they are often killed off at higher rates than cishet or white women.)

For the most part, no resurrected characters. By that I mean no characters who die but later come back to life. However, if you think your character should still count despite their resurrection, feel free to make your case to me in the ask box. If you convince me, I will count them.

No characters who are injured or incapacitated but do not die. However, just like above, you can make your case to me in the ask box and if you convince me, I will count them.

Trans women are women, so feel free to submit trans characters. ABSOLUTELY NO TERFS ALLOWED ON THE BLOG— YOU WILL BE BLOCKED ON SIGHT. YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE.

No nonbinary characters unless they also identify with being a woman. Nonbinary people ≠ women. There aren't many nonbinary characters in media in general so I do not think this will be much of a problem but I wanted to specify just in case.

If the woman was killed off for a reason other than making male character(s) sad or plot convenience, then it does not count. This trope is not just any woman who died—there are plenty of ways to kill off a female character in a well-written way!— it's specifically unnecessary or gratuitous killing of female characters in a badly-written way.

I reserve the right to reject a character if I do not think they were actually fridged.

I reserve the right to reject a character if I am not comfortable including them.

I think this goes without saying but no real people.

No unofficial or small media (ex. fan media, OCs, a comic on someone's Tumblr, etc.) as I feel like that could encourage bullying on individual people. Stick to comics, TV, movies, anime, etc. etc. etc. Even if they are smaller but "official" in some way it can be included.

Submissions will be open until December 1st, but if I get a lot of submissions early on I will close them early.

SUBMIT HERE

[icekingofhope]

(Quick thing I wanna say i have no shame making this image)

MY PROBLEMS WITH THE LMK SHIPPING SIDE OF THE FANDOM

also before you say I probably hate it cause of it being “gay” well lemme tell you something as a lgbtq person no I don’t but the problem with it

is cause it’s something I always see in fandoms they always take the most toxic relationship and make it lgbtq examples

there is the comic killing stalking (IF YOU PLAN TO READ IT PLEASE BE AWARE THERE IS VERY DARK TOPICS IN IT SUCH AS KIDNAPPING AND SUCH)

the fandoms literally ships the two main characters together despite 1 one is not even gay he just uses the other guy cause he looks like his mother 2 HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED THE GUY AND DOES HORRFIC SHIT

yet people still ship them

another one

sonic fandom now we all know sonics fandom is honestly one of the most toxic fandoms the ships are also the same I seen people ship sonic with infinite from sonic forces despite kidnapping him and torturing him

And the same can be said for Monkie kid

Like macaque x wukong or the mayor x syntax or the very problematic proshipper side nezha x any character

And thing is I notice many fans make excuses for these Such as “it’s really not fully based on jttw” or “well the show said-“

While they should know that many fans of the book or grew up with Chinese culture is VERY uncomfortable like literally

I seen people who grew up with these stories of Chinese mythology being EXTREMELY uncomfortable with the ships hell one of my best friends @maythepain/@gardenofdismay is Chinese and grew up with the tales and she is extremely uncomfortable with it

And I feel so bad cause it feels like fans are just taking advantage of these stories and importing whatever they want into it like it just any other fandom!

the only ships I seen people and I am ok with is

dbk x pif or tang x pigsy

For dbk x pif the reason being it’s canon for BOTH source materials they were married in the book and still in the show

Tang x pigsy it’s heavily impiled in the show they are indeed a thing or aleast have feelings in the mix and that’s fine!

hell the same thing can be said for the small implications of sandy and pigsy being exes on good terms with how they act and the pictures from season 2

All I’m saying is

is that as a fan we should respect the culture and people who grew up with the tales who are uncomfortable with the aging up nezha and shipping him with people or how wukong and macaque share the same dna or how the brotherhood acted like a family or any of the sort!

I’m not saying you can’t ship anything in lmk there is some good ships out there and hell if you want you can make a OC x canon me and my friends discuss it many times!

but please don’t make people uncomfortable by using their culture inappropriately or for some sick joke

anyways that’s all I have to say thank you for reading

[camirami]

I have soooo many thoughts about the Scott Pilgrim anime.

Unfortunately none of my friends have watched it yet so I'm quietly going insane. Fortunately Tumblr exists! So I get to scream into the void and rave about this gem!!

Going in, I felt the pacing for the first episode felt way too fast?? Was really disappointed because it seemed we skipped too many steps forward to the big fight? Then OHHH boy suddenly it made perfect sense.

Scott, btw, has immaculate rizz. Can't believe it worked.

I was on the fence whether or not that was different good or different bad, but the second episode kept me in. Third episode all but confirmed I wasn't jumping ship at any point

I absolutely ADORE how the other characters in Scott and Ramona's lives get a lot more love. Though we got some hints that the league wasn't all that bad in previous adaptations (well, mainly just the one ex), the anime really fleshes them out and shows hey!! They have their own side of the story!!

About Ramona: I'm glad they made it more believable that she's actually in lesbians with Scott. They switched their positions and instead showed her being the one to go completely gaga over him for the entire show, something the rest of the cast consistently point out makes zero sense!! Total dumbass move on her part. They're perfect for each other god

I know I praise the show for fleshing out characters, but I guess the price for that is some important figures get pushed to the background. I guess being an adaptation it assumes the viewer will have read and watched both the graphic novels and the movie and wouldn't need to know more about these characters? Honestly not too affected by that actually

That being said, the anime doesn't require you to immerse yourself in the preceding comic/movie. People new to the series will still have a blast!! But your viewing experience would be vastly enhanced if you actually did read and watch them because they go well hand-in-hand

The game and the movie had amazing soundtracks, so it's no surprise that the anime would deliver on that front as well (but I might just be a bit biased just because of the mortal kombat theme in the finale)

But actually surprising, is the voice cast was very good?? I knew going in the cast from the film was gonna be the English voice casts, but I was a bit skeptical because live-action actors don't always do a good job doing VA work (LOOKING AT YOU CRISPRAT). There was never a moment where they came off as awkward.

Despite some very glaring changes, the show retains pretty much the same story beats and themes as the book, but with an additional focus on Ramona's own tendency to run away from her problems. The finale still ends with them wanting and trying to be better for each other, but this time everyone gets a happy ending!! So I think that kinda makes it better than everything that came before it

My dad talked about how amazing he thought the Scott Pilgrim movie was and I'm gonna take SO MUCH JOY knowing he'll be seething by the first episode alone. This shit is so gay. Absolute 🔥

[netflixandchilis]

My thoughts on the Red, White, & Royal Blue movie (as someone who has read the book four times)

I was so excited when I heard that this book was being adapted into a film. As time went on, my anticipation continued to grow. When the casting announcement came out I was elated, and then trepidatious, but I kept my hopes high. I think it is important to remember that, above all else, this film is a rom-com. With that said, my thoughts:

(*Spoilers Ahead*)

1. Alex and Henry

Let's start with the biggest element here, the stars. When I saw the casting announcement my first thought was "wow I can't believe my favorite characters are going to be on-screen". My second was, "aren't they a little old to be playing Alex and Henry". I kept this thought until I watched it and I have to say they make total sense in the context of the film. Aging them up was a great decision in my mind, it made me feel like the characters were at a point in their life where their romance wasn't a fling before growing up, but a conscious decision to have their established lives intertwine. In the book, McQuistion has 400 pages to let us see into the minds of these characters, which doesn't translate well on screen. I also think having a fun queer rom-com for people in their mid-20s is rare.

2. June not being in the film

I missed the "White House Trio" immensely but I think that if June had been in the film she would have been lost. Everything I loved about her wouldn't have made the final cut, I saw this even with Nora and Pez. However, this meant that the found family trope was not included and that was my favorite part of the book.

3. The Richards Campaign

I was disappointed that the Richards campaign and Senator Luna weren't the crux of the third act, I think that made the book so riveting and added a layer of political intrigue to Alex's side. Henry is seen as the one who would face any backlash but the Richards scandal showed that American politics can be just as messy and controlling. The film didn't show this and instead, it is implied that Alex's former hookup leaked the emails. I hated this, but I understand that they couldn't include the original antagonist. I also think this sends the message that a queer person's greatest enemy is their own community or even themselves. At the end of the day, Alex was outed by a jealous ex and Henry was shown that he was the only one preventing himself from living the life he wanted. He didn't have to give the monarchy an ultimatum backed up by his mother and family, he just chose to not listen.

4. Princess Bea

I wish so badly they would have included or even alluded to Bea's substance abuse. Learning that made me sympathize with her character and love how she was there for Henry. In the film, I feel like she is ambivalent about the control the monarchy has. She is very caring of Henry but I feel that not including how her life has been shaped by rigidity made her lack the depth she had in the book.

5. The Karaoke Scene

My favorite scene in the book is the karaoke scene, which was changed in the film. The karaoke scene is the first time we see the prince fully let loose and be himself. It's a scene where Henry allows himself to be flamboyant and unrestricted and that didn't happen in the movie. Instead, it was in a podunk country bar in Texas. I think the scene could have had the same vibe as the book at least. The characters were in Austin, they could have at least gone to a gay bar. I found the lack of silk kimonos devastating.

+1 Things that I wish made it to the film

Ellen's powerpoint

Alex outside the palace before the love confession

Henry talking about having to join the army

The vase!!!!!

Hall & Oates

Henry playing Your Song

Cornetto scene (which I KNOW they filmed)

Prince Henry's sass (+Nora introducing him to Drag Race)

"I'm taking a picture of a national gay landmark... and also a statue"

Henry's philanthropy and refusal to use royal funds

Final thoughts

I have seen the film twice fully through now and I have rewatched some of my favorite clips, overall I love the film. I think I, as well as any hardcore fans of the book, would have loved to see more. I've seen a lot of people say they wish this would have been made into a series, but I think that would never work. Don't get me wrong I would love it and watch it endlessly, but that isn't what this book was about. At the end of the day, the book is about the Prince of England and the First son falling in love, and that is what made it into the movie. Do I think it deserves an Oscar, no, but I also have seen The Proposal over fifty times and I don't think that's a groundbreaking film either. This is a very well-done rom-com that I will rewatch when I want to feel happy and wholesome. And when I want to see political betrayal, silk kimonos, developing friendships, and vulnerable conversations over ice cream, I will reread the book, the same way I have been for the past three years.

[dyk3medown]

omg i need something about the reader being super into reading and really smart and catching robin’s eye somewhere, she just becomes obsessed and won’t stop talking about her until eventually they get to talking and get closer and start dating after she confesses (i almost never see any other sapphic writers so ur profile makes me so happy)

Crimson and Clover

robin buckley x reader

summary: robin gets paired with the reader, who she's had a crush on all year, for a class project

warnings: fem!reader, mostly fluff, just robin and the reader falling for each other

a/n: i don’t really love how this turned out but every time i changed it more i hated it so i hope you like this anyways nonnie!! i love seeing other sapphic writers too, it makes my day. this fic is named after the “crimson and clover” cover done by joan jett & the blackhearts. i don’t know if she meant it to be gay, considering it came out in ‘81 but i’m interpreting it as such so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"Robin Buckley and Y/N L/N."

Your head shot up, attention drawn from the book you had been reading by the sound of your name.

You twisted around to look behind you, where Robin Buckley sat for your third-period English class. "What's happening?"

"Mrs. Wilson is assigning partners for the project." Robin explained. "We're together."

"Oh, okay, that's good," you said with a small smile. You turned back around, burying your nose in your book for the last few minutes of class.

The bell rang, and you got up, packing your stuff and making your way out into the hall.

"Robin!" You called out as you caught sight of her a few steps ahead of you.

"Oh, um, hey." Robin seemed surprised to see you standing there.

"Do you want to come over?"

"Uh, come over?" Robin looked a bit startled. "Like to your house?"

"Yes?" You titled your head to the side. "You know, for the project?"

"Oh right, the project, that's what I was thinking about, coming over for the project."

"Okay, does tomorrow at seven work for you?"

Robin seemed as if she hadn't breathed since the start of the conversation.

"Seven is good, seven is great actually, I can do seven."

Your brow furrowed as she talked, trying to make sense of her behavior. Did you make her nervous? Could that be the cause of the rambling? You didn't consider yourself particularly intimidating, unless it was a matter of intellect, so you couldn't imagine why Robin was acting so… flustered.

You didn't know the girl well, but from what you had seen, she usually acted much differently, radiating an "I don't care" sort of vibe and muttering sarcastic quips to her friends.

This Robin was kind of adorable.

You smiled at her and nodded. "Seven it is. My address is 1843 Oaktree Knoll, I'm not too far from here."

"Can't wait!" Robin froze as she seemed to realize how eager she sounded. "To start the project I mean, I'm very excited about it."

"I didn't realize you were such a big fan of Dostoevsky," you said, raising an eyebrow.

Robin laughed nervously. "That's me, um, I just love Russian lit."

You said your goodbyes and made your way to your next class, a small smile still on your lips.

Unbeknownst to you, Steve Harrington was also informed of your plans. Well informed, in fact, considering that Robin wouldn't shut up about you for their entire shift that night. She had talked about you previously, but you had quickly gone from "the pretty smart girl in english class" to "new obsession."

6:55 the next night found you sitting anxiously on your bed, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth as you waited. You tried to focus on the book you were reading, but all of your attention was trained on listening for the sound of the doorbell.

It really wasn't like you to be so nervous, especially related to a project you knew you would do well on, but something about Robin being your partner was causing you to behave differently.

You had replayed your last conversation in your head a million times since the other day. There was something so endearing about the way Robin acted, almost like an excited puppy.

After a few more excruciating minutes, you finally heard the chime and shot up, racing down the stairs to the front door. You stopped in front of a mirror in the entryway, pausing for a few seconds to make sure you looked okay, before opening the door to reveal Robin, who looked just as nervous as you felt.

You welcomed her inside and the two of you went into your room, spreading your stuff on the floor to start the project.

To your delight, Robin was smart. Like, really smart. She was able to build off your analyses of specific passages with ease, offering new ideas that even you hadn't considered. She even knew Russian, just one of the four languages she spoke.

Eventually, the conversation turned from your project to learning about each other. Robin seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say, asking follow-up questions and nodding eagerly along. She was also hilarious, you quickly found out. Every time you giggled at one of her jokes or sarcastic comments, Robin was determined to hear the sound again.

It was midnight before you even thought about looking at the clock. You were shocked by how quickly the time had gone by, too focused on Robin to notice how dark it had gotten outside your window.

Robin followed your gaze and was surprised by the time as well. Unfortunately, she had to leave, and you walked with her outside to her car.

"This was fun." You smiled at her. "Well, as much fun as an English project can be."

Robin chuckled. "I had… a surprisingly good time. Not that I was expecting to have a bad time or anything. Just, you know, school work isn't exactly the most fun thing in the world."

"I get it." You shook your head in amusement.

You and Robin made plans to meet again on Saturday, and once you returned to your bed, you realized that you were still grinning like a maniac.

By the time Saturday rolled around, you were practically vibrating with excitement, counting down the minutes until she came over again.

This time when you brought her to your room, she seemed much more confident. Though you had invited her over again under the guise of working on the project, neither of you even attempted to bring it up.

Conversation flowed easily, and you had ended up sitting on your bed, much closer than before, knees brushing in front of you. Robin started touching you casually, a hand on your arm when you said something funny, innocent contact you could easily dismiss as just being friendly. The look in her eyes and the slight flush in her cheeks every time her fingers grazed her skin told a different story.

It seemed like she was almost… flirting with you?

Oh.

You connected the dots, finally understanding her reactions, the initial nervousness and all of the excitement. She liked you. In more than just a platonic fashion.

You tried to act as normal as possible, but internally you were completely freaking out. There was always a chance you misread the situation, but you really, really hoped you hadn't.

You fell quiet as you sat with your realization.

"Y/n?" Robin noticed you had withdrawn from the conversation. "Is everything okay?"

You took a deep breath. "Robin," you forced yourself to fight through the nerves and look at her directly. "Do you like me?"

Robin's eyes widened and her mouth fell slightly agape. "Uh, well, um of course I like you! You're so smart and funny and-"

"I mean like me. In a more than friends type of way." You bit your lip, anxiety flooding your body. "Because I do."

"Oh." Robin avoided eye contact.

Your heart sank into your stomach at her reaction. Clearly, you were wrong about her feelings. How could you have been so stupid? She probably didn't even like girls, and even if she did, she would never go for you.

"I'm sorry, I just thought…" Your voice was slightly shaky. "I don't know what I thought, it was dumb. I shouldn't have said anything."

"Y/N, no," Robin's eyes snapped back to you, and a spark of hope flickered in your chest. "You just caught me off guard!"

"I do like you. Like really like you, okay?" She huffed a laugh, shaking her head in disbelief. "I just never thought you'd feel the same."

"Well, I do," you replied, a smile growing on your face.

"You're totally stunning and so, so smart. You're perfect, Y/N." Robin leaned in closer, placing her hands on your knees reassuringly. "I'd be a total idiot if I wasn't into you." 

She paused for a second before blurting out, "Can I kiss you? It's completely fine if not, I don't want to make you uncomfortable, actually I-"

And there was the rambling you had grown so fond of. 

You cut her off as you closed the gap between you, kissing her gently. Robin could feel you smiling into the kiss as your lips moved in sync with hers, wrapping your arms around her neck and pulling her closer.

Robin had always thought the whole "fireworks going off while you're kissing" thing was a massive cliche with no basis in reality, but now she understood. You couldn't help but feel the same. Sure, you had kissed people before, but no one had ever made you feel like this.

Your relationship was just barely beginning, and you really didn't know her that well, but as long as she kept holding you like you were worth more than the world, you thought you could love her.

And you would. 

"Now I don't hardly know her, but I think I could love her."

[exoticalmonde]

Stultifaring The Navis (Formally)

I had at least 5 of the medals since the last time, which makes it all both easier and harder, because last episode in the ship of seaborn - I did not have Lappland. So you can guess I had no way to auto run anything in EX.

Anyways, I've armed myself up so well I only had to sit and laugh at this pathetic little creature

and whatever lies this is trying to insist on

Anyways, since I got lots of money from the purple tickets and the overall shop, I managed to get W's new skin and I am REELING at her quotes. I have grown to l-.... like... her. Kind of. In the way that Ines would like her I guess, and I like Ines in the ways that W would like her. It's tolerable. I don't WANT to hate them, I do not in fact hate them. I just don't know them well enough to care but I would absolutely give my husband a chance and bond with the women in his life because if he trusted their character and ended up picking me, then who am I to ever argue?

So I've been going wild with his

[Transcribed: Hoederer, what's wrong? Oh, the book you wanted me to check out? How should I know? What's that pile of ash in the fire? Hm... Oh! I "mistook" the book for tinder a little while ago. Eh, it's fine. We're cooking dinner with knowledge tonight. It's gonna taste fantastic, don'tcha think?]

I AM SO MAD ABOUT THE BOOK IF THERE IS ONE THING I AM A MATERIALIST FOR ITS BOOKS AND W IS *Shaking her* WOMAN

---

[Transcribed: Check this potato, Ines got a head like so-Hmm... now that I think of it, you could probably squeeze a bomb into a potato. Maybe a good trick to play on some miserable dumbass. Hey, Hoederer, you want a potato?]

Dying.

---

['Transcribed: Hey, Hoederer, I've been thinking. If the two of us went at that nasty Kal'tsit, how do you figure our chances taking her out? I mean, you guys are always planning for all contengencies, so we gotta have a plan for that one too, right? Hah, now that's a funny look on your face.]

I LOVE THAT HIS FACE IS SO EASY TO READ HE IS SO TRANSPARENT AROUND PEOPLE HE TRUSTS I AM GOING TO MELT I LOVE HOEDERER SO MUCH

[Transcribed: My name... My name... Hey hoederer, you're always reading books, so why don't you come up with a name for me? Theresa said I should come up with a new one... Wait a second, what's with all those books? Pick a name myself? Go to hell!]

---

[Transcribed: Theresa called me over and told everyone what an amazing fighter I am, but she didn't look happy at all. How can I make her happy...? What if I invited her over and cooked her a nice dinner?]

She is so gay for Theresa... Good for her, good fo- *remembers Theresa is meant to be dead and now that she is not dead she is on the enemy's side and we are both devastated* Ah.

[Transcribed: How many pieces of candy am I worth now? I actually like that method of valuing people. You sure we shouldn't go with that?]

I will never give up on the idea that you just... cost candies. This really is such a Laterano situation instead of a Sarkaz one. And don't get me started on the whole 'they were once the same-' yeah, isn't that terrific?

Today is a special day where we do all the visiting

And the shopping

Picking up my fish husband from the training grounds so we could take him for a little nap since he's been there for a while.

Taking him for a little walk down memory lane.

---

Previously: Me, while guiding Dr. Kryo: "Show me the little handies." Pinkie: "I hate that, because it... usually means a handjob." Me, insistently: "Give me visuals of your little handies, Kryo." Kryo: "Oh my." Lundi: "Just take my Lappland." Kryo: "Taking Lundi's Lapipi." Me: "I hate that. Terrible. Suddenly I understand how Pinkie felt."

---

That being done, let's finish with what I actually came here for

YOU

It took me forever to get this level. I actually spent less time on the boss stage than trying to figure out how to use 3 roombas to clear the mess those seaborn create and---

The urchins. The squid urchins have always been the answer.

But that didn't stop Ebenhold to complain about all the times I failed.

Ebenholz: "We can hardly call this a win. Are you the one that got a headache and not me?" Me: Slams fists on table Ebenholz: Me: "Graf Urtica… don't challenge me. I can kill you on a whim." Ebenholz: …. Me: …. Ebenholz: ….. Me: "Oh. Yeah. Now I see my true self shining through huh?"

---

"First time?"

"We've been here before."

"This Motherland aint big enough for both of us."

"It's three against one."

"Let me introduce you to my little friends."

*I actually let one slip, so we had to edit the team's skills a little bit*

HAHA! You cannot get through

'Brethren, the road is clear! I can see it now! There's land ahead, the taste of hope is upon my tendrils and I can feel that there's nothing to stop us anymore. No enemies in sight, all losses have been atoned for. I shall be the first to lead you to the motherland, I will take you with me and I will never forget the names of the fallen---'

*instantly frozen and evaporated*

---

There was nothing funnier this night actually than all the quotable memes where both me and Dr. Lundi are laughing and screaming at the stupid fish in every phase it exists in.

Here is my contribution to the meme everybody's been talking about now that all of arknights have a Lappland, a Jay or *checks notes* Ho'olheyak or however you spell the name.

[identity-theft-101]

Spilled milk of a DnD character? Well I am intrigued, how is he like spilled milk?

Hes just like the added old man to ever.

FRANK MY BELOVED MESS OF A MAN-

anyway:

FRANK THE BARBARIAN BUGBEAR EVERYONE!!

Hes 40 years old, having a midlife crisis, and his Ex-Wife Shyrl took the kid the cat and everything

He doesn't have clothes (the dm has offered me the option but Frank will not buy pants ♡)

He had absolutely no money until a magic rat bit his companion (a 9yr old looking Elf girl who also had no money) and magically gifted them money

Frank met the Elf in a trash bin btw

Frank wants to be a bard, but his singing and lute playing is canonically so bad he killed his elderly neighbor with the sound (which is why shyrl SAID she divorced him, I think it is a lie and she divorced him to be evil instead)

His lute is stolen and also his club, he rolls at disadvantage to play the lute

-2 intelligence, he has no preception

+4 charisma, basically the sexiest Bigfoot ever

His cat Steve (that his ex wife stole) popped up in the campaign and im pretty sure he's an eldritch God of some sort

Canonical has a fear of large bodies of water after nearly drowning 5 minutes after meeting his Elf companion

Thought said 9 year old Elf was going to eat him, for 4 hours

Has canonically eaten a cursed rock. DM can roll to make Frank poop himself and fail a strength check.

Has canonically asked his Elf companion if she carried Human bones and if he could eat one

Canonically had a Tuna can fez that he lost in the near drowning incident

Assisted in starting a forest fire, did not stop it

Was canonically in a gay criminal gang as a teen

Frank has a daughter named Mimsey that he hasn't seen in 5 years since the divorce, Mimsey is 9 years old like the Elf companion

Shyrl was an Elf and Mimsey a half Elf (dnd party helped me decide that)

Frank has attempted to steal a magic tent

Frank has eaten everything he has killed in campaign

Everyone associated in his teen crime gay gang has not recognized him and he lost potential npc clues

Frank once argued he should be given a discount on a book because it was bloody and becuase he couldn't read the language it was in

Subconsciously treats his Elf companion as a daughter, (he named her Sprout since she didn't have a name)

Somehow bumped into another bugbear, 17 y/o, Frank is now a single divorced dad of 2. Send help.

Once walked onto a boat and the crew was too afraid to kick him off until they were on the next continent

Has not showered in 3 months

Consistently rolls 1-4 or 16-20, no in betweens

[mysteryofloveforevermore]

Dear Charmie Family

Unfortunately freedom of speech doesn’t exist in our world when it comes expressing ourselves freely but I thought I might be able to express my opinion about this subject at least. First of all, I shall mention that I find it hard to believe that Armie had four mistresses or more I didn’t count them when I was reading the article, sorry😅🙈. The main reason that I can’t believe everything that was mentioned in this recent article is that who would take such paparazzi photos with one of their mistresses and being unable to touch them normally and then trying to hide their face in the photos since they are laughing and posing for paps🤔 Also the other woman who first started this terrible show on their IG is obsessed with Timmy and CMBYN, and used to attend cmbyn book tour, premieres and interviews.

Furthermore, how is that you’re so loved by your female costars that the moment they see you they are rushing to hug you and talk you since you always made them feel safe and have always been very respectful to them but suddenly the moment you announce your separation, you’re an a**hole, abusive partner, cheater, drug addict and mentally unstable. I mean how comes you were so normal before and then why creating a finsta the moment the weird show started and then why should you give its password to journalists to write such horrific articles about you. Moreover, those women don’t seem the submissive type at all and all of them want nothing more in life than fame. But obviously the mind behind this mess didn’t want to finalize their divorce since they knew their plan is incomplete if the one who’s guilty in your fake story won’t admit to everything that you wrote, I mean how else could she ruin his life and his career. But I do believe what he said about his childhood, family and committing suicide, anyone else in his situation might have had suicidal thoughts. And lastly why would he become so heartbroken and furious over the fact that his costar was being papped with their fake gf, and mentions fried chicken and NYC (obvious references) if at that time he had a wife and a mistress, that doesn’t make sense to me all. Also isn’t odd that you’re ex wife always got mad when someone commented that you’re so good at playing gay roles and compares being gay to being a criminal and now after you mention that you love kinky sex with women, you should also mention that you’re 100% straight and never had a male lover. Sorry if you don’t agree with what I said, you’re probably right and I’m 100 percent wrong but I just wanted to mention some of my thoughts. I couldn’t resist and I should add these wonderful photos to this post too, gosh I’ve missed those days💙💚

[mtel420]

Counter-Exposing Banjo/Tiredite/Lunar Moonyu/Lunar Cheese - Part 2

If you want the whole backstory- https://www.tumblr.com/htcsense5/732278019975151616/counter-exposing-banjotireditelunar-moonyulunar?source=share

Hey guys.

NKYT here.

As you guys know in October, we have exposed banjo for her past self for trying to expose arsik and since our expose did nothing to her, i deciced to speak on my side of my interactions with her that i had back in July 2021 - January 2022 with banjo before i disappeared because of her (we will get to that later on). So i guess let's start with the story..

After the March-June war was declared, i gave banjo a second chance, because i thought she truly changed and won't do those mistakes again but unfortunately, we were all wrong….

In the end of July 2021, things started to get worse because i saw David saying "binoi sucks" and i instantely sended that to my now ex-friend banjo and she wanted me to ask him "is that a joke?". And from there on, people, including my friends thought i was choosing her side, which would come to appearant when she stole me from my friends in August 2021 with some weird ass love message. And everything after that my career was gonna go downhill.

In September 2021, she began going "me mad" over David, doing his series of "Live streams for phones" when i was featured. She started accusing me of her being disappointed of David and then me like YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA IGNORE VCS WHAT IS THIS???

Then things will get worse when in October 2021, banjo started using "gay jokes" on David for vcing with me which i wasnt ok with her making those jokes to both of us, but she kept going.

In November 2021, it got even worse when she heavily continued calling david gay and thinking of drawing a ship between me and david because we were just only vcing. She was also saying things like "imaging saying gay things to him" and shockingly "imma burn david for being gay" showing homophobia, which is pretty ironic since now in 2023 she became pansexual.

She has already stolen me from my friends but things will get even worse in December 2021, specifically on December 31st 2021 8:28 PM. Hours prior to that, banjo started to get me into Touhou characters by guessing them in what we call her stupid edition server, also known as "The Mayakou Server" thing. While i was already doing the things banjo told me to do, my friends started posting some memes in that bot guessing channel and then something in my brain was like they were trolling me so i sent a meme that had a guy reading a book said "how to deal with idiots" or something like that i dont remember. And then the worst happened. Arsik blocked me shortly after that and there was exchanges between me and my friends.

It makes me sad to know that banjo made me hate my own friends, my own community, the people that made me successful, and i blew it all out because of that one whore. People after that started to hate me for choosing banjo and for insulting one of my best friends over some petty drama. I was already cancelled because of the drama i had with my friends thanks to banjo and in the result that made me quit all social media on January 15th 2022.

When i was out of Discord by that time, i was on still on David's streams and then banjo saw that and started harassing David for being "gay" because he made me alive (umm what?) and she tried to revealed his full name.

11 months later, i would finally apologise for all of the wrong things that i've done in the community and thankfully everyone gave me another chance. 2 days after i returned to Discord (26th of December 2022), Banjo would try to friend me on my new account, but i've ignored it, because if i have accepted her again, everything would have gone downhill just like in December 2021.

Anyways we wouldn’t get any updates from her until February 11th when a weird account by the name of "私について読んでください#4082" sent me a friend request that had a pastebin link which at first didn’t work. But after it got edited to work, it was clear that banjo was again trying to apologise to us and get us back, but we declined it.

Then on April 2nd, Banjo would try to friend me again on her main account, this time with her about me page being "nick i only came to talk to you" which i was suspicious what was she going to talk about so this time i accepted it to see what she wanted to say and a day later, i got a response by her and again SHE WANTED TO APOLOGISE. sigh. So i told her that "it’s impossible to move on to another chapter of your life, if you keep re-reading the last one" and blocked her after that.

Things would finally go back to normal after she stopped trying to get us back, but unfortunately, that wasn’t the end. On June 9th 2023, Banjo again tried to get me to respond on Instagram by her saying that she can’t forget me and that when she sees a bulgarian person, it reminds her of me for some reason (like why?). But anyways, i didn’t bother responding to her so i ghosted her.

But then on July 3rd, i wanted to talk to Banjo for the last time, because she was mentioning our names and i wanted to put an end to this, by saying that she needs to keep our names out of her mouth.

She was like "ok, i will move on for real" on my dms, but in reality, the next day (4th of July), she says that we are ignorant like wtf and wanted to be racist by saying that she wants to be a bulgarianphobe and supporting Macedonia. She was saying such nasty things even after i told her to stop, but nothing help, same thing on August 20th (our next confrontation, this time in a gc), nothing helped.

Like imagine hating a WHOLE country only because your crush rejected you like wtaf💀.

And here we are on August 20th 2023. A day prior to that, she tried to befriend our friend and owner of Project Mobile "Gunbo" who actually accepted her friend request which prompted us to tell him to add us to a group with her so we could tell her to just leave us alone for the last time, but while she was like "I will try i will try" she once again was mentioning her drama with us and referred to us as "the nkits" so yeah, nothing helped.

And then here comes October 22nd, 2023 when a guy attacked servers Arsik was in with an exposé of him, in it banjo’s tried to expose our good friend Arsik for him acting sexually to banjo when in reality arsik was 11 and banjo was 13, and she even thought that arsik was 10. And also she purposely hid her name so that people wouldn’t hate her for erping with a 10 year old. So we fought back with our expose which people called "baby drama". And this is where i lost it. HOW CAN YOU CALL ALL OF THIS TRAUMA THAT WE HAD TO SUFFER BABY DRAMA??

Anyways before i go off more, i just want to say that this drama isnt baby drama. This is serious shit that people need into, by taking a look at our exposés against banjo and realise that this is all serious and we aren’t joking around, but sadly banjo didn’t get cancelled over our exposé and people were still supporting her, despite the expose that arsik made being already public, but no one gave a damn sadly. But here i am shining the light on the fact that banjo is an full-on creep who sexualises minors and hypnotises her friends into being on her side.

And now comes December 16th 2023. The day we joined the Java-oriented server "Kahvibreak". We wanted to join with my friend because we were interested in java preservation too, but we knew that banjo was there thought we joined nonetheless since it’s a good server. And hours later, banjo saw that we were in the server and she went "baiii my enemies are here" which made the people in kahvibreak become suspicious that we came to harass her, when in reality, we didn’t want to harass anyone. Soon after she left, she changed her Discord name to "JUST DESTROY ME.." to now "A....". (update: she has returned. no surprise)

So yeah this is the whole story of my own point of view of what is like to be friends with a creep and a nsfw artist. And to everyone who is reading this. It's best to avoid any interactions with Banjo because she is a manipulator and a creep that has been known by our community, but despite that she wanted to return after we told her to move on, but as of now she’s trying to join other corners of our community, never missing the opportunity to say something about us and how we cancelled her and whatnot. It's crazy that people like banjo exist and makes me furious that people call our drama childish. Like can you just take a quick second to see that this is very real and serious? Banjo traumatised us with her explicit art and it’s not a joke. Anyways, i hope we can spread this message across our community and her community so people could very well know her backstory and why they should not be friends with banjo.

Banjo is an attention seeker who would do anything to bring light to her dying career, including in some rather shady ways. She’s using her past for attention and it’s rather pathetic.

Anyways, im working on a folder called "Banjo's Hellhole" which includes all of her moments and once the project gets finished, i will provide a Google Drive link for it so you can guys get a better look at her. But for now, that's all that i have to say about her.

Thank you all for reading this and Fuck You Banjo!😉

[backjustforberena]

It might be faulty assumptions but I always presumed that Laenor was Rhaenys favorite child. Not something she could say because how would that look the overlooked for a male heir woman favoring a son over a daughter?

You said Laenor is everything you could want in a son, but not for Corlys. Laena is everything Corlys wanted in a son, but didn't get. Laena is brash and brave and devoted, wild in the best of ways and fully aware of all their family is.

Laenor is sweet and kind, yes he's brave but in a different sort of way. He's not picking fights that he can't win, he's not trying to gain more, advance more, he's trying to hold to his place in life where it stands, even if sometimes he doesn't know where that is.

Rhaenys demurs a little at Laena's proposed marriage to Viserys, but outright worries over Laenor and seems to want to reject the engagement out of fear for her son.

Also it seems like she spent more one on one time with him, at least young, someone had to teach him how to be a dragon, how to fly.

Firstly, I just want to say that I don't think, on this subject at least, that there is such a thing as faulty assumptions. I don't really care to hear if you think Rhaenys and Corlys hated their children or didn't feel anything for them because I think that's untrue. But when looking at nuances within the relationships and especially considering such a thing as favourites... so long as you have good reasoning, then I may disagree with you but I'm not going to say you're wrong wholeheartedly or that you're being anything approaching stupid or foolish or one of those words. I'm not going to insult you or seek to offend, basically.

I hadn't really considered the optics of Rhaenys's position as a past claimant having any real impact on who her favourite child might be or what she'd say if she was asked. I think the danger on that has passed. I don't think it would be particularly read into. It's also worth saying that, whereas Laenor is the younger sibling in the book, Laena is the youngest in the show. So it wouldn't be anything alarming to anyone if she showed favouritism to her eldest child who just so happens to be son. It's not indicative of any opinion that daughters are inferior, especially without an inheritance actually involved.

An interview that I suggest watching, and one I rewatched for this ask, is THIS. At about 3 minutes in, Eve and Steve are asked about their preferences towards their children, though only, really, within the context of fulfilling the ambition of getting close to the Throne. That, for me, is pretty much gospel because that's how the actors themselves have played it and I think it comes across, even when, as they say in the interview, it's not really in the script.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. It's very sneaky stuff, with Eve coming to Steve's rescue a little bit. Certainly, I think we can say that, even just taking away the subject of "favourites", what they say on Laena being like Corlys and perhaps Laenor being like Rhaenys is true, just in terms of emotional connections. And Corlys's role as a patriarch is always going to be harsh on Laenor. It just is, whether there is love there or not or whatever the personalities are. He is the heir, he has expectations hat would have been true if he'd married a local gentrywoman or... in this case, the Crown Princess.

The only way that Laenor fails, as a son, is that he doesn't produce heirs. Everything else is pretty much spot on. He's a great warrior and someone who learns at the feet of his father. He's an experienced and dedicated swordsman. He's a dragon rider, which is epic. He's described multiple times as honourable, with a good heart. He's dutiful - aware of and willing to do his duty. I think Corlys would rather that than someone looking to pick fights.

I don't even think that Laenor being gay bothers Corlys so much. He'd rather it wasn't the truth, make no mistake, and he's harsh surrounding it and prefers to pretend it doesn't exist. But it doesn't seem to disgust him, Laenor never seems ashamed on Driftmark, he's still got Joffrey around etc. If Corlys wanted to put his foot down, I think he would. He does when that sexuality threatens the image of their house but we never see him pull Laenor to task on it. He just ignores it. Plus - the guy was a sailor. He's been to every corner of the world. I doubt homosexuality is the most shocking thing this guy has seen.

I suppose I never really thought of Corlys and Rhaenys instilling the same sense of ambition and drive in their children, or whether they look out for it. When you say Laenor is "not trying to gain more, advance more, he's trying to hold his place in life where it stands" - I don't know if we ever see specific disapproval from Corlys or Rhaenys surrounding that. They certainly don't display it but I think part of that reason is because they don't hold the slight to their mother in the way that Corlys and Rhaenys do. They didn't raise Laena to seek an advantageous match or to be disappointed that she wasn't Queen or even to want to be Queen. They didn't raise Laenor to want his blood on the Throne or to do everything he could to ensure that. Those ambitions seem very, very personal to Corlys and Rhaenys as a couple... if that makes sense?

As to your point about Laena's proposed match to Viserys against her reaction to Laenor... for that I would say yes but... the advantage we have with Laenor's match is that we have a private scene with Corlys. That is the only time she speaks without a mask up and she speaks freely and truthfully about her feelings. We don't have a private scene of Corlys and Rhaenys where they discuss a match between Laena and Viserys. So there's every reason to think that she could have expressed a similar level of worry.

As for one-on-one time, actually, I think Rhaenys probably spent more time with Laena overall. If you add it all together. They'd be bound together because of their gender and the activities that come with that. But also, more specifically, because Laenor was away at war for three years. He was in the Stepstone. So, whilst there's going to be some one-on-one time with dragons, that's still a big chunk of time where she didn't see her son but would still be raising Laena. She would have participated more in Laena's childhood than Laenor's. Though, it could be, again due to roles and whatnot, that Laenor also ended up spending more time with his mother than with his father overall. Who knows.

[dreamingquinn]

Thinkin about gender and spirituality

Preface: I don't have a real point to this. I just remembered you can basically post anything to tumblr.

My ex-mother in law said something to me the first time we met. "I've never understood queer relationships. You need the masculine and the feminine to balance eachother out... But I suppose that's why gays tend to have one masculine partner and one feminine partner."

This woman was a huge name in the druidic community of the UK. She is polyamorous. She told me that she remembered past lives and regularly saw the dead, animal and human. But she couldn't wrap her head around the idea of something outside of heteronormativity.

And she wasn't the only one in my life like that. I was basically raised a little heathen but I still grew up white in the US. Christian overtones policed my thinking and the thinking of those who influenced me. Most of my non-male partners have been feminine in their gender expression, and in turn I acted more and more masculine. I tried to fit a role based on expectations rather then what I (or even my partners) wanted.

Now I'm with someone I expect will be for life. They are 'masc' in that they are Butch. Not divorced from their womanhood even if they do not embrace that part of themselves the way someone who really enjoyed more 'typical' femininity would. Meanwhile I just bought two skirts for the first time since middleschool and I'm becoming even more comfortable with the term 'agender'.

I'm still a spiritual person, more now then when I knew and had access to people with connections in the 'neo pagan' movements. And yet every fucking time I see people talking about spirituality I still see people stumble over the ideas of the 'masculine' and the 'feminine' in nature.

My ex-MIL also said once that I should be careful not to anthropomorphize things. That my experience with a specific tree feeling safe when I was a child in need was probably just me projecting.

On this one thing, I actually agree with her. We project a lot of bullshit onto the natural world. And onto ourselves. Especially in the spiritual community. What is masculine about the sun? What is feminine about the moon? Nothing. They are objects in space with mass and gravity. Why would that make them any less magical? They still have a huge impact on our lives. The sun's impact is generally more overt. The moon's is more subtle. We can talk about these things in how they relate to us, I don't think that's unreasonable. You can't experience the world except from your own perceptions. The sun is hot and brings life but also can cause damage and death. The moon and night is cold but gives us the tides which effects us just as much but usually in ways we either live far from or don't directly think about/see.

The problem really comes in, I think, from how we don't just say 'the sun is masculine and the moon is feminine' it's how that inevitably leads us to imposing that duality onto people. People pose anthropomorphized ideas onto things that are not human and in turn try to use it as a mirror or a measuring stick to hold up against themselves or other humans. And not all cultures even believed these things or have lines drawn this strongly, I know. But I can only talk from the experience I've lived. The presence of strict ideals that specifically Christian-fascism (current and historic) have given us are so pervasive in people like me that they go completely unquestioned. Every book I read, including my ex-MIL's did nothing to question it, and in many cases actively reinforced it.

It's really no wonder that there is a fast and ugly pipeline of 'witch' to 'right-wing' if the people who position themselves as outside the mainstream culture are still just recreating it in the spaces they make.

[boqvistsbabe]

Ok so fun gossip I heard

- 2 of the hockey boys had been secretly (nothing is actually a secret to me) dating for like 2 years but one is a science god who weightlifts competitively and plays 2/3 other sports very well and the other dropped out to smoke weed so they don't talk anymore and that is almost definitely the stoners fault and the nice really smart one is now stuck with a bunch of assholes because that was his only friend and he doesn't know that the queer femmes would adopt him to carry our bags

- there's a really popular girl who reads like Harry potter and colleen hoover (this is irrelevant I just like slander) exclusively who wants to be a radical politician but has never read any theory and don't follow politics

- the self appointed queen bee who cheated on her decent blonde bf by hooking up with her ex bffs abusive ex and then she left him for blondie and now has an on and off throuple with blondie and his besties, both of them are proclaimed straight and all of the are friends with shithead

- same queen bee and blondie, she posted on her til tok her rice purity score and it said that she had never come during sex, they were together for like 5 years and she has caught him watching porn while they fuck

- the annoying ass conservative dude who is like 6'6 and is the bad bitch lesbians man servant (he says friend but idk) started a fight with a known tiny 14 year old gang member and when a knife got pulled his mom, who works at the school, called the cops, same day a kid got stabbed in the head with a pencil during math but that was unrelated

- the grade 11 gymrat that my friends and I are fairy gay parenting into leftism at the start of the year believed that drug dealers deserve the death sentence (we are canadian???) and his ex gf's brother is in prison for petty drug crimes and his new gf is a scary bisexual weed dealer but I influenced him to be way better and they are a power couple

- all of the boys bathrooms are missing the soap dispenser and the mirrors, sinks and toilet seats are regularly stolen also once a custodian quit after having just walked into the main one

- we had a 3 hour secure school because a girl punched the librarian and the librarian passed out and then the girl hid somewhere in the school

- at a beach party during the summer my favourite random school person (you know what I mean, right?) was super drunk and shot a firework at the police, put his Crocs in sport mode and then ran away, successfully as well

- same dude had a job at an arcade and would break in during the night to just vibe with the lasers and run around drinking and smoking I guess, he also once hid from the cops in a tree, he postef all of this on his snap

I can't think of other big ones but this should do for now

Omg it’s been forever and a day since you sent this but I’m still gonna react to this lol

- okay first of all what a story second of all I feel bad for the one guy 😢

- okay but like that checks out based on the books soooo

- wild absolutely wild. First of all cheating is so bad but somehow who she cheated with made it even worse? Also throuple?!

- NOTHING IN FIVE YEARS?! WHAT IS BRO DOING WRONG (obvi everything but like omg) also while they fuck? 🫢

- man servant I love 💀💀 also hang member? ! And a pencil stabbing? That’s a lot on one day

- death sentence?! Omg?! Literally what? Also ur so slay for that tho

- it’s giving devious licks 💀😭 also that’s so real

- why did she punch the librarian 😭 like what

- (ik what u mean, i love my random people) AT?! Also putting the crocs in sport mode then running is such a funny picture

- this guy sounds like such a vibe tbh