#shitty dnd ideas

[shittydndideas]

A warlock who follows a chaotic hivemind that speaks through their mind and sees through their eyes. It randomly grants them gold and a longer life, but at the cost of hearing ungodly information nobody wants to know. Each voice's name is indecipherable. Each word spoken is physically painful. Every moment is misery, yet it's vital to the warlock's ability to live. And the party knows they're in pain, when they say... "Chat, thanks for the five dollars."

Hi, I love your brain

[richardsphere]

DND Idea: Google Chimera's

So i was joking around about using Googles Emoji Kitchen for Wild Magic Surges when i realised. They have like, a lot of pre-made art for animal+animal emoji. Some highlights

Turtlama, i'd base the stats around the Camel, increase its AC for the shell and give it an acid-based spit attack.

Unicano: like a Unicorn with the ability to cast Ashardalons Stride and Minute Meteors at will

Tigoat.

Goose-opus

Spiderhen, its got web, climbing speed, websense and a deafening crow. (Alternative Underdark variant: The Cockadrider)

Bee-at, Its honey can be used as an alternative material component for fireball.

Fungtle, it emenates toxic spores around itself and retreats into its shell for protection

Cactider. Like a regular spider but able to cast Hail of Thorns at will and deals piercing damage to anyone that attempts a failed melee attack against them.

The Leviruthan.

The Propa-Gander. (you are not immune to it)

[friendlygiantmushroom]

A d&d character who dual wields weapons she calls the Marys: Wollstonecraft and Shelley.

She supports women’s rights AND wrongs.

[lazerlight3201]

DnD Weapon Idea:

Checkovs gun

A gun that, despite being drawn often and having a safety that is always turned off, is never fired (mind you, this is not due to an inability for the gun to fire. It is unknown why the weapon has never been shot, and any attempts to find out have failed). The first time the weapon is drawn, all within viewing distance of the user (aside from allies) are forced to make a dc25 wisdom saving throw; if this is failed, the viewer is given the frightened condition. Subsequent drawings of the gun lower the dc by 5, then in increments of 1, until the dc reaches 0, at which point all who view the weapon enter a state of rage (whether they are barbarians or not) due to being done with the users bullshit.

[anenragedenchilada]

DnD idea:

Warlock, but their patron is a hive mind known that will only respond to the name "Chat"

[onyxxartist]

hear me out:

d&d but by the end of the campaign the entire party develop into a chaotic polycule and it confuses the fuck out of the villain.

[ms-scarletwings]

Now I don’t mind this established trope at all where people are basically ants in the minds of dragons, but then, just once in any fantasy media or campaign I want a dragon or other massive higher creature that responds to the existence to humans in the exact way that I do to bugs.

Dragon that stops flying because it saw someone sleeping in a field and pokes them with a branch out of sheer curiosity to check if they’re dead or not.

Dragon that watches goblins scurry into one of their little huts and just pries the roof off to stare at them and look at the inside of their little shelter before putting it back down with a satisfied grin and leaving.

Dragon that sees a person treading water in the middle of a lake or the ocean, carefully plucks them out, and sets them down on dry land. Maybe puts a goat’s leg in their lap in case they need a snack. Also calls them “Harold” for no apparent reason.

Very young dragon that screams and freaks out upon seeing a bearded man with brightly colored robes and a pointed hat until it realizes the guy isn’t casting any spells. “Ohhhh you’re a wizard mimic” and then proceeds to handle the guy for a few minutes, fascinated. It also addresses the dude as “Craig” the entire time.

Dragon grabs a wild boar and repeatedly starts placing it in front of a town because it wants to see some hunting behavior in action.

Thief gets caught sneaking into a dragon’s lair. Resident reptile roars and is seemingly about to obliterate them when its mate suddenly comes rushing in with a giant cup. They have a grumbly back and forth before the thief is scooped up and promptly brought to be dropped off at the nearest random village. Dragon’s mate refers to the thief as “Sullivan SillyMan” the whole way.

Dragon that encounters a member of a humanoid race it has never heard of or seen before, at least in this region. Stops everything it’s doing and immediately kidnaps the individual. Speeds back to its lair and keeps them imprisoned while trying to flip through some tomes. Eventually drags out a magical item that they use to open a communication with another dragon, describing the prisoner, showing them the prisoner, exchanging friendly banter. There’s a whole 30 minute to and hour convo and everything. Dragon refers to the captive as “Thaddeus” the whole time. Last thing it does is sketch out a drawing of the person before taking them back to where they found them and turning them loose again.

Dragon doing this to a gnome

[probablyvampirerpgideas]

Make a Vampire character who just really sucks at hiding the fact that they're a vampire. Like it's really fucking obvious dude, no one is being fooled here, you look like one those feratu.

[spacebugarts]

I would like to formally thank whatever artist just possessed my hand and gave it the ability to DRAW CLOTHING ON A DYNAMIC POSE JFC

[shittydndideas]

Assuming it’s safe to, put your pet on the battle mat and let them determine the monster’s movement and actions. Keep them to scale with the minis. Bonus points if you keep the monster on theme.

Although probably a bad idea because if your pet is interested in the minis it’s probably trying to eat them and if it’s not then it kind of defeats the point. You’d also probably need a really big battle mat for anything bigger than a cat

If they're going to interfere with your game anyway, I think it's perfectly reasonable to give your pet an actual job on the table.

Somebody should send me a pic of a particularly large pet tortoise engaging in a scene on a battle mat. I need it for reasons I shan't explain.

[richardsphere]

DND DM Tips

Legit something i've been doing now that i've been getting the "pornbots-who-dont-even-have-porn", is add their names to my "emergency NPC name" list.

[nothingbutferal]

Shitty dnd character/npc ideas

A forest nymph with a southern accent who's catchphrase is "What in carnation."

an Australian druid who wild shapes into a kangaroo and when someone compliments it they say "Thanks! It has pockets!" And they stick their hands in their pouch.

An asexual paladin who accidentally took an oath to the god of lust when they got drunk at a tavern one night. They don't break the oath because no one wants either of them. God or paladin.

A cleric who's patron is the DM and they make VERY specific prayers. When they make these prayers they just look deep into the DM's eyes until they finish to make them uncomfortable.

A kenku who's only way of communicating is by mimicking Gordon Ramsay.

Gordon Ramsay.

A copper, dragon born, philosopher and mathematician who's name is "Nicolaus Copper-nicus."

A bard named Ted who gives bardic inspiration by giving long speeches about whatever the party is about to do.

Any class. Any race. But they have ADHD.

Therapy dog werewolf.

[lovelesslittleloser]

A party of lawful evil clerics is just a cult

[wilted-wizard]

Shitty dnd character idea: a character who by all means should be an npc but by unfortunate turns of fate got dragged into the party

[king-rydacted]

An Absurd Game Changer Themed One Shot Premise:

Have you seen Secret Samta?

For the uninitiated, this episode is where contestants have to open mystery gifts and tell the other players what’s inside. If anyone else steals it, they get the gift but if no one steals, the original player gets the gift. The twist is- there are nasty punishments too, so players are encouraged to lie.

This sounds to me like the perfect premise for a D&D game! Start with mostly completed character sheets (maybe omitting proficiencies and equipment at DM’s discretion) and a bunch of prizes and punishments that affect both the characters and the players.

My suggestions: a -1 longsword, a +2 to any stat, DM gets to decide to make your roll a nat1 once, 2 proficiencies of any type, must speak in iambic pentameter or rhyme, cannot break character ever, character is aware of the game in a meta way, etc etc. Bonus points if they slowly ramp up in intensity.

Basically you just take these and you play secret samta before the one shot, so that you have funny bonuses and disadvantages. I know I’m for sure staging this for my bday one shot this year.

[spellshite]

Listen. Listen this stupid idea: Warlock that has racked a collection of pacts because nobody said they couldn't ask for a favour to other entities and at this point it's just a betting pool between patrons to figure out which pact they'll accidentally break firsr and who will get their soul.