I've wanted to be a YouTuber since I was in middle school but man. If you'd told me then I would get to this point off of Five Nights at Freddy's theories I would not have believed you at all XD
But hey, despite its ups and downs, I've really enjoyed being able to talk to and with people about it. I've been able to have a lot of awesome experiences being part of this community, and it's been great.
So, thank you to everyone for your support. It means a lot to me.
Well, everyone...it's official that my YouTube silver play button has arrived today!! I thank you all for 100K subs on my channel recently, and I'm really glad to be supported by all of you in great need! For those who haven't seen my channel, click here! Anyways, thank you all for 100K subscribers on my YouTube channel!
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I love when someone's all "oh haha I'd never do something fucked up" burying all their disgusting and violent feelings and urges, even if there ARE few.
And then I come crashing in on a wrecking ball like, "hi babes I'm going to push your buttons till you let go :3 and you're gonna l o v e it"
I'm like that one loli from that one nhentai comic, the butterfly one. No one knows the reference I'm making, probably.
But like. Everyone and I mean everyone has a point at which the most buried parts of themselves come to rise and I feel this uniquely exciting feeling of seeing a side of someone they show to no one, not even their closest loved ones or worst enemies. A side they cannot even show themselves. It makes me horny as hell but also just strangely happy, like a weird kind of happy. Like elated totally hypnotized and cathartic and floating happy. :3
I love unraveling peoples layers and layers of protection and rationalizations and normalcy until I get to the contents of their little gift. The box is big and stringy, but the gift is so, so small and delicate and so, so powerful it needs so much wrapping to contain it. And when I get that gift, I take it in my hands and unleash it right there right between them and myself. And all of it they take out on me, and I feel like I touched God. Really, truly. I just saw such a big secret. The biggest one. The tiny, powerful little thing that is all the things you are afraid or disgusted to even look at inside yourself. The ugly, gory guts of it all. That quiet, quiet violence.
i hope whoever decided quiz show should be in megamix got fired. but also i kind of hope they got a raise because idk what we'd do without quiz show bad jokes n that's the basis for like 90% of them-
anyone else with aphantasia sometimes gain the ability to visualize things but ONLY in the moment like RIGHT before you fall asleep when your thoughts get all blurry and abstract and your senses start fading?
or is that just related to how sometimes if i'm sleep deprived enough i will start having very vivid lucid dreams before my body actually fully falls asleep