#snail says

[thesnailphilosopher]

the editors reading all of johnny's notes:

[faeryfoxie]

btw i got a new paci recently n never put up the pictures!! lookit!! my first paci with a filled teat oooh

[spitblaze]

[guy who doesnt watch shows voice] yeah ive been meaning to watch that show

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

[tawnysoup]

the fritter (frin critter)

[saspitite]

i really wish apple snails weren't constantly hated on like they are (from what ive seen at least) like all those videos telling you to immediately crush apple snail eggs whenever you find them and describing apple snails as "evil"... like yeah they are invasive. but that doesnt mean theyre invasive everywhere???? and that certainly doesnt make them evil?????

"but theyre devastating the environment" okay. are they doing that on purpose. are they doing it maliciously. trick question no they fucking arent obviously. yes its important to maintain our ecosystems and that does partly require keeping invasive species out of areas they dont belong in but you dont need to fucking villainize an entire species in the process. i think apple snails are cute fuck you

[spacy-snail]

Hobie Brown is the best representation of authentic punk culture I’ve personally ever seen in media

I feel like most “punk” characters are just visually alternative, and maybe a little “stick it to the man”, but that’s about it. They ultimately don’t stick the landing when it comes to the values the punk community has

But Hobie does!!! He backs his words up with his actions! He sticks to what he believes in, causes chaos, fights fascists, is an instigator, is anti-establishment (including the spider society), he has blue and yellow coded laces (as always these animators are amazing and did their fucking research), and he literally disrupts every scene he’s in with his art style!!

And most importantly, he CARES about his friends, which is what I think a lot of “punk” characters ultimately are missing. He’s the ultimate hype man for Pavitr and Miles, he helps Miles escape like 2 minutes after meeting him, he watches out for Gwen when she can’t go back home, he talks sweetly to Mayday when no one else is listening

Anyways I sat there in the theatre watching this chaotic SOB thinking

[smoosey]

Happy Star Wars Day! 🤍 Here is a VERY self-indulgent Cody art for May the 4th!

Please check out the alternate version & details under the cut 🫶

[mod2amaryllis]

it is insane to me how every experienced fish person can be like "you need pest snails to properly maintain a planted tank" and you still get aesthetic weirdos who vomit cry and scream at the sight of 1 little hitchhiker

[taxonomicons]

boyfriend wanted to watch the hit classic Turbo 2013 and mumbled to himself “that snail is just so fast”

[t00thpasteface]

oh okay i see how it is on this site. everyone loves me when i'm botanyposting but SUDDENLY when i make a catholic priest fuck a surgeon in an active warzone, it's crickets,

[thesnailphilosopher]

hey so. are prev chains broken for anyone else like. you can't view the reblogee's post anymore by clicking on their username

@staff @staffs-secret-blog hello?

[faeryfoxie]

the newest paci i got is filled and the teat deflated so now i'm scared i'm gonna get a mouthful of glitter ughhh

[mail-me-a-snail]

tune in next time for more of the game samer im snail reich and that sounds pretty good to me!

[thecontentsofyourfridge]

His name is Buddy. Do not scroll past without saying hi to Buddy. He is escaping that bath bucket to eat you.

(Also I know snails don’t have genders, but my whole family calls him he)

[cadriox]

How to draw Chilaios by me