#snoth

[monster-every-day]

day 81 - 3/21/24 - snoth

it took him a while, but he got here! a mix between a snail and a sloth, this creature is the slowest animal alive. hence why he's 13.5 hours late! seems like he made sure to look nice and spiffy for his big day, since he has no moss growing on him!

[verocd]

[kittycoffeeheart]

Snoth.

[perplexed-angel]

My contrabution to the 5th

[loopscereal]

my contribution to the poster collab that never came to be lol

[cloudymistedskies]

Minor change with Mari’s design: She has more eyelashes now…

[distantsolarsystemsandsnails]

are the snails distant too? or only the solar systems

huh, i’ve never thought about it before. i think just the solar systems are distant in this case. the snails are close up. like this

but distant snails sounds cool. wait i’m gonna draw what i’m thinking. ok here it is:

a distant snail. probably part of a distant snailar system. wait fuck should i change my url to distantsnailarsystems? or perhaps snistantsnailarsnystems? eh, maybe later.

anyway, thanks for the question!

[lehhoh7822]

for @oknerd3

[magnesiumxp]

urghejfjiecnszsk i keep drawing this creature. debating if i should like. clean/fix it up a bit/add more details and color this or not. cause i kinda like it but idk

[grandwretch]

my spleen hurts so bad rn

[verocd]

[suckunaa]

don't blame me, your love made me crazy - jjk hockey!au celeb!au masterlist

summary: i couldn't get a hockey!au out of my head, but had a celeb!au i'd been thinking about too and now here we are! this will be a smau hybrid set in this little universe i've created, featuring most of the jjk guys on the same pro hockey team and various !celeb readers. i have posted all info needed (see links below). while i may make random posts for all plots at times, my intention is to focus on one or two plots at a time. i will, however, be posting half chapters for all stories in the next few days. i tend to be a rambler and love thinking about all the details, but if there's anything you need clarity on please do not hesitate to reach out and ask!!

these stories will contain: f!reader, mature content (including smut), mentions of addiction, teen pregnancy, pregnancy, vlugar language, and is intended for an 18+ audience.

hockey players // !reader info // plot summaries // other info //

please note it is intended that all characters in this verse know each other at least as acquaintances. see below the cut for all pairings/chapters list

hate to be lame - satoru gojo x artist/influencer!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau chapter 1 it might be true (2.1k words) chapter 2 but I think you knew (1.2k words) chapter 3 it's always on the tip of my tongue (6.3k words)

i once was poison ivy but now i'm your daisy - kento nanami x popstar!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau chapter 1 but i bet we'd have really good bed chem (4.4k words) chapter 2 dreaming of you as my lover (5.6k)

my heart skips eight beats at once - choso kamo x indie music darling!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau

snothing ever stops you leaving - sukuna ryomen x former disney kid turned a list actress!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau

wasting all our time, to think we could be casual - suguru geto x model/fashion darling!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau

so tired of eating all my misspoken words - toji zenin x reality tv star turned mainstream actress!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau

break my heart and i swear i'm moving on to your favorite athlete - takuma ino x leader singer/guitarist in a band!reader

chapter .5 an introductory smau

[red-garden]

Are snakecumwar dressing up their daughters? maybe with bows, if not little outfits? (Having no arms and needing your whole body to slither on surfaces is an impediment to clothes, I guess, but??? you're telling me SQQ *wouldn't* get them little hats, or something??

Liu Qingge learns to knit to keep them warm but he’s not very good at it, basically only able to make sneaters (snake sweaters)- pictured below

Shen Yuan commissions outfits for his snaughters so they can be dressed for any occasion

Zhuzhi Lang does not dress them up because he personally doesn’t wear snothes in his snake form.

[animationnut]

You Have Me

Day 5: Parental Units

Ao3 link here!

...

Monogram reclined in the leather chair situated in the corner of the broadcasting room, flipping through the intel packet for Agent J’s nemesis. The day’s scheme was a bit of a doozy, including stolen plutonium and an abandoned nuclear powerplant. Though Agent J was certainly a capable agent, she had never dealt with evil of this scope before. It seemed Dr. Shlockenfeld was taking inspiration from some of the most heinous radiation disasters.

He made a note to switch missions between Agent J and Agent P. Handling Dr. Doofenshmirtz would be a breeze for Agent J, and he had full confidence that Perry would efficiently and safely ensure Dr. Shlockenfeld’s arrest.

There was certainly no way Monogram was allowing a maniac who planned destruction with plutonium the freedom to scheme another day.

Hurried footsteps sounded in the hallway before exploding over the threshold. Monogram glanced at his watch. “Two minutes before your shift,” he observed. “Running behind today, Carl?”

“Ith was a bith dithicult for me to geth outh of bed.”

The clumsy speech caused Monogram’s brow to furrow. He spun around to face his intern, unable to stop the gasp from escaping his lips. “Carl! What happened?”

Carl’s face was black and blue, the right side of his cheek puffy and swollen. There was a thick bandage over his nose, and the bridge of his glasses was covered in a thin strip of duct tape. “I’m fine!” he said reassuringly, trying to smile and wincing with pain. “Okay, I’m really sore, buth other than thath I’m fine.”

“That’s not what I asked,” Monogram said tightly. A sensation that was both hot and cold churned in his gut—hot with fury, cold with fear. His initial thought was that, somehow, Carl’s father was out of prison and had located his children. The idea caused his fingers to curl into his palm, his nails biting into his flesh.

“Er, ith’s a bith of a sthory,” said Carl, dropping his bag by the tripod and powering up the camera. “I’ll tell you after the mission briefings. Um, I think I’ll sthay behind the camera today, so I don’th freak any of the agents outh                                                                        r.”

Given how much his agents adored Carl, Monogram figured this was a good idea, otherwise he would have a riot of animals wanting to pursue justice for whoever harmed him. And there was an insane person out there with several tonnes of plutonium, so no distractions could be afforded.

It took every ounce of self-control for Monogram to keep his eyes on the camera lens and his voice neutral as he went through each mission briefing. When he signed off with Agent Z, he turned sharply to Carl and said, “Story time. Or, should I say, sthory time.”

Despite his concern, he could not help the jab, and Carl smiled for half a second before grimacing in pain. “Ow. I had a craving for sushi pasth midnight, so I wenth outh and picked some up. On my way home, I heard screaming coming from an alley, and I saw a man being rough with a girl. I intervened…sorth of. He beath the snoth outh of me, buth ath leasth the girl goth away.” With a sad sigh, Carl muttered, “He stomped on my sushi.”

“Never mind your sushi, he stomped on your face,” said Monogram with a frown. “Why didn’t you call in today?”

Carl’s face tried to make a scandalized expression, but his muscles were too bruised and sore to stretch that far, and he ended up looking like he was constipated.

“Never,” he said seriously.

“Are you on any painkillers?”

“Over the counter ones.”

They clearly weren’t working very well, given the constant grimaces twisting across his features. “Where did this happen, again?” asked Monogram.

“In the alleyway two blocks down from July Sushi.”

Monogram tried to picture the area. “Are there any cameras in that vicinity?”

“No, but I did get a blurry picture.” Carl pulled out his phone and brought up a fuzzy photo. Monogram studied it, but all he could make out was a poorly dyed mohawk and a silver stud pierced into the chin. “I was thinking I could use our software to clear it up.”

“Let’s go,” said Monogram immediately.

Carl had to jog to keep up with the man’s long strides. They entered the control room, where Carl plugged his phone into the console. With a few expert keystrokes, he removed the flaws and his assaulter’s face was revealed. Monogram reached over Carl’s shoulder and typed a few commands of his own.

He ran the picture through the United States Database of Criminals, Delinquents, and Various Sorts of Rapscallions.

Tristan McGee, age forty-five, and living in one of Danville’s lower east-side apartments.

“Sir?” ventured Carl. “I…I was just going to show this to the police and file a report.”

“You don’t need the police, Carl,” said Monogram evenly. “You have OWCA.”

You have me.

“Go home, Carl. Take the rest of the day off.”

“I’m fine, sir!” protested Carl. He swivelled in the chair, giving Monogram a pleading glance. “I swear.”

He seemed to be in good spirits, despite the state of his face. Monogram relented. “All right. But if the pain gets to be too much, head home.”

“Okay!” chirped Carl.

As the intern went about his daily tasks, Monogram set about gathering some intel. He wrote down an address, used satellite imaging to study the area, and stalked some social media posts. During lunch he made a few errands, and pretended Juice ‘n Stuff messed up his order and gave Carl a smoothie.

At the end of the day, Monogram walked Carl to his car, his eyes surveying the parking lot. Though he knew it would be solely OWCA personnel on property, he could not help but be on guard. “See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow, sir!” returned Carl.

Monogram set his hand against the car door, preventing Carl from closing it all the way. “I’m proud of you, Carl. You did good.”

Though Carl could not give a full smile, his eyes shimmered with delight at the praise. “I just did what anyone should have done.”

“That’s the difference, Carl. Most people don’t. But you did.” Rapping his knuckles once against the roof of the car, Monogram eased the door shut and stepped back. He watched Carl as he pulled out of the parking lot and into the street.

“Right. Now, time to teach a punk a lesson.”

…

Tristan McGee slouched into his apartment; a can of alcohol clutched in his fingers. He flipped the switch located beside his door, pausing when the place remained drenched in darkness. Cursing under his breath, he tried it a few more times, but the result did not change.

“I’m paying too much money for this dump,” he snarled, whipping his beer can against the wall.

“You need to seek help for those anger issues of yours.”

Tristan nearly jumped out of his skin. He peered frantically into the pitch-black apartment, but could not make out the source of the sudden voice. “Who’s there?” he shouted, gripping the doorknob.

But the door remained firm, no matter how hard he pushed.

“There’s no where for you to go right now, McGee.”

Forming fists, Tristan moved further down the hallway, stepping cautiously into his den. “I’m going to kill you,” he said darkly. “Quit hiding and come out.”

Something seemed to peel straight from the shadows, darting towards him, and he threw a punch. The figure dodged and landed a strong uppercut, sending him straight to the floor. Disoriented, with his teeth pulsing inside his mouth and his jaw throbbing, Tristan grunted as he was hauled up and slammed against the wall.

“I should do to your face what you did to his last night.”

It took a minute for Tristan’s brain to process the words. “Is this about that weakling?” he asked incredulously. “The one who got into my business? Did he hire you?”

“No.” The voice was calm, too calm, and it sent shivers down Tristan’s spine. “He doesn’t even know I’m here.”

The grip on his neck tightened, ever so slightly, enough to cause panic to flare in Tristan’s gut. “Here’s what’s going to happen,” the shadowy figure continued. “You’re going to receive an invoice. You’re going to send the money to the link attached to the invoice. Don’t try to claim you don’t have the money—you have $10,000 sitting in your account.”

“How do you know that?” asked Tristan fearfully. “Who are you?”

“Your worst nightmare, if you don’t do exactly as I say. Once you get the invoice, you’ll have twenty-four hours to send the money. If you don’t, you’re going to receive a visit, one that you’ll regret far more than this one. And don’t bother calling the police—they won’t help you. I’ll make sure of it. Do you understand me?”

Fingers cut into his neck, and Tristan hissed out a breath. Whoever this man was, he knew where he lived and had access to his bank account. He was also strong, and one second away from breaking his neck, so all he could do was wheeze, “I understand.”

“Good. And if you ever go near that kid again, I’ll knock your teeth out. You’re almost fifty. Act like it.”

Tristan yelped as he was tossed bodily across the room, crashing against the back of his couch. When he scrambled to his feet, the figure was gone, and the lights suddenly flashed to life.

He was going to need a new pair of underwear.

…

Once Monogram was in his car, he peeled off his black full-face mask, which matched his black body suit, tossing it into his backseat. He glanced at Perry, who sat in the passenger seat, laptop sitting on the floor. “Thanks for your assistance, Agent P.”

Perry gave a thumbs-up. It cost him zero energy to keep McGee from opening the door. He gave a curious chatter—he certainly understood the threats and the manhandling, but what was up with the invoice?

“Carl needs new glasses and prescription painkillers,” said Monogram, shifting the gearshift to ‘drive’. “And he’s damn well going to pay for them.”

Perry grinned. Monogram glared at him. “And if you tell Carl a word about any of this, I’ll smack you silly.”

Perry smirked. I’d like to see you try. Softie.

[battleaxeproficiency]

sometimes . to cope with it all . I try to think that it would always have been impossible to leave . that even if things had gone as planned I would have graduated and left ncf behind . but if that had happened it would all still be there . i could still see it . I could still go and be there and enjoy it . but it's changing so horribly and it's not fair . it's not fair and I want to go home .

they're cutting trees down and ripping out the mangroves and all I want is to go home . why did they change the colors of the chairs . it's CHAIRS . and all I can think about is the sunsets and the lonely nighttime walks and pointing out the constellations . I miss the hammocks and I miss the busted old chairs and I miss the trees and I miss the sunsets and the people and the sounds and the birds and the dolphins and the sand and the salt and the waves . I miss the bridge and I miss the beach and I miss the mangroves and and and .

[glitterhammies]

ARTHUR FLECK X READER

Coming home from work and sharing a cute moment with Arthur before falling asleep!

WARNINGS- NONE

JUST FLUFF

You were coming home from work, you spent most of your days working in a tiny bookshop in the nicer parts of Gotham. It made enough money to pay for bills and you enjoyed it enough even if the days were slow the only problem was the commute back to your flat it was long and tiring, especially after a hard day.

Your favourite thought on your journey home was Arthur, you knew he would be at home waiting for you, he used to meet you at the subway station and walk you back to your flat but after Penny needed more looking after he decided to just head straight home and you would meet him there.

You had been living with Arthur and Penny for about a year now, helping spread the bills between the two of you to let Arthur focus more on his stand up career. It was something you didnt mind it meant that you could spend more time with Arthur and experience what it was like to finally own a place together even if his mother was hanging over you all the time.

The trains were long and dragging this particular night, it took ages for you to get back to your station then still you had to walk all the way back to the apartment, by then you were completely exhausted and just needed bed. You opened the door to your apartment and was greeted by a rush of force coming at you. Arthur was there

"Where have you been, I've been sat waiting" he said face full of worry.

He had obviously been pacing back and forth, you could tell by his sweaty forehead and general look of distress.

"Hey baby, I'm okay in right here" you say placing your hands on his cheeks "the trains were delayed it took longer than expected" you kissed him on the nose then stood back to start taking your coat off and hang your bag up.

"Well mother is asleep already, she's been going on about the letters again" Arthur sighed giggling slightly

"Do you really think he will respond" you ask turning around to face him

"He's a busy man, but I don't want to make her unhappy so I just go along with it. One less thing for her to complain about" Arthur said and he took your had and escorted you to the settee.

Since penny had the bed you and Arthur have to play Tetris on the settee each night to get to sleep. Either it's you lying on him or you both top and tail or one of you admit defeat and end up on the floor. Just one more reason why you wished you could move out and have your own space with Arthur.

"Are you hungry, I can put something in the microwave real quick" Arthur asked before he sat down.

"I'm okay just come sit with me"you say pulling him into you, "I've had a long day I just need my Arthur for a bit"

You heard him give a small huffed laugh, he still couldn’t quite grasp the fact that you loved him. He always assumed he would never find someone to love him for who he is and not just to use him. But every time he hears you openly show your love towards him it makes his heart flutter.

Arthur goes to lay down pulling you up onto his chest, your head resting just underneath his chin. “Wish we could stay like this forever” he says into your hair. “Wish we didn’t have to deal with the bullshit out there”

You looked up at him noticing a slight edge to his voice, “bad day as well?” You ask.

“Snothing, just the guys at work making fun on my act, says a clown ain’t funny if he laughs at his own jokes” he recalls

“What” you respond lifting your head up “ but your like the funniest person I know, why do you think I fell for you?”

“Because I’m funny?” He whispers back

“Exactly” you exclaim “ I mean your gorgeous face also helped but I mean who cares about that”

He chuckles under you “ you really think so”

You lean down towards his lips whispering into his mouth “baby I know so, it’s what makes you you and I don’t want that to change…ever”

You lay back down onto his chest relaxing into his grasp now realising how tired you are.

“Baby” you mumble “ tell me some of your new material”

“Are you sure? Right now” he asks

“Mhmmm I want to hear your voice” you mumble back head fully in his chest.

“Okay let me think” Arthur responds, for the next half an hour Arthur tells you his new one liners, some which are sfw some which you giggle at simply because of how violent they seem. After a while he notices you not laughing anymore and a quiet snore coming from you.

He giggles to himself. “Oh my love what are we going to do with you he says to himself”

He kisses the top of your head again “goodnight my love, sleep tight” as he turns off the lap near his head.

Hey !!! Took a little break but I’m back to writing again! If anyone has any suggestions for scenarios they would like to see please let me know. I’m able to write sfw and nsfw whatever floats your boat. Okie byeee

Till next time little hammies!