#snottiest

[willowser]

my mood right now is wanting to grab bakugou by the front of his shirt and pull him so close to me that you can't see him any longer and then all you hear are kissy noises and when i let him go he's covered in lipstick smooches. like in cartoons.

[thistledaily]

thistle day 20!!!!! it is a little crazy to me ive drawn 20 thistles. wdym. STILL. been listening one one snippet of hold them down from EPIC the musical (the one about Telemachus lol dw) so thats. most of the inspiration for this.

[bbgoffic]

Side by side comparison of Tech Bad Batch saying "what is your issue" and Cordelia Chase Bad Bitch saying "what is your mental trauma?"

[chamerionwrites]

99% of farmers' market/craft fair customers are very nice but there's always one dickhead who's either hugely offended that you aren't charging sweatshop prices for hours of labor, or just negging you in some weird nonsensical way.

[kazbiter]

wtf do you mean horrors beyond my comprehension i'm a woman who works in restaurant dining. in america.

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Bonnie: Fashion disaster or fashion master? It could easily go either way

But either way he's still a fashion diva.

[dwellordream]

the hadestown concept album was better sorry

[givelifetoaworld]

today i had a “Karen Moment” - i bought a grossly overpriced iced coffee at a little market in the zoo, charged $7 for it by the 15 year old girl at the counter, accepted this just fine… until my partner and friend checked out and were charged $3 for the same thing right in front of me by the same and one other teen running the counter. i pointed this out like “hey i don’t normally do this but you clearly overcharged me and not them for the same exact thing” and these two teens got so pouty and upset repeatedly saying “we just made a mistake :(“ each time i asked them to correct the charge - they finally did it when i asked for them to call for someone if they didn’t know how because i understood mistakes happen but they need to correct the error instead of trying to shoo me away. this finally got them to do something but they were 1) mumbling angrily loud enough about “rude people” for me to hear it, 2) had the gall to apologize to the person behind me who did not care at all, and 3) refunding me the whole thing (???)…

anyways i don’t like that borderline child labor is like completely normalized to the point where a kid at a register gets close to tears when you ask for a correction in a nice voice and they try to pout their way out of it, and that “Karen” culture has made it so you are the literal devil for asking for what you paid for or to not be overcharged lol

[stevebabey]

sending u a big kiss 🫶💜 @stvharrngton

kiss so tenderly received, thank u honey <3 🥹

[charlespecco]

Trent using that particular Adele song for his Klopp goodbye video like does his socmed team not know I’ve already taken too many hits today 😭

[aiteanngaelach]

this is so miserable

[owlsoap]

calling an insurance customer service help line and getting spoken to like you're the biggest idiot baby in the world for not already knowing the answer to your question about your health insurance like I'm not calling an insurance customer service help line to get help from their customer service.

[foldingfittedsheets]

When deciding who to work for there is a sliding scale of employers that goes from lil mom and pop shops up to corporate monoliths. I have worked at both ends of the spectrum and I can pretty definitively say that tiny businesses are hands down the most insane employers.

The sweet spot is a place that has like 10-20 stores; that’s the best possible work environment. They’ll be polished enough to have protocols that make work structured, but not so bogged down with bureaucracy that nothing can ever get done.

This story is not from that sweet spot. This story is from my time working at Oil and Vinegar. Now, like many little franchise stores, the idea was solid. There was on tap imported olive oil and vinegar and it was really delicious. Top shelf. Unfortunately, each location was like the Wild West because owners varied wildly.

My owner was the human embodiment of Mr. Krabbs. His eyes were just constant dollar signs. Throughout my training he informed me of the price of every single piece of equipment I touched and how much it cost to replace it.

He had cameras set up to watch us, and an app on his phone to access the live feed. He’d call us to ask what we were doing when he’d just checked a camera to make sure we were being honest.

Now, the trouble was he had two locations. His location further south did amazing. It was way more centrally located and got three times the foot traffic. The one I worked in was in the snottiest mall possible in Arizona and consequently the rent was through the roof.

It was not going well for my store. We didn’t get as much traffic, so there was only so much I could do in a day. I could dust, sweep, and wait for customers. I read a lot and was frank when he called to interrogate me. I always asked for additional tasks but he never had any. What could I do to prop up a failing business?

But this man was convinced there was some Secret Reason that the store I was in was doing worse. He crunched numbers, looked at staff, and eventually hit upon the most insane possible solution.

We used too much toilet paper.

We were probably stealing toilet paper! Bleeding him dry one single ply square at a time! How dare we need to use the bathroom?! His south location used half as much toilet paper as we did, we must be thieving little monsters!!!!

Friends. The south location was populated entirely by men. My location had three people on staff who had to sit to pee. It was so blindly transparently the source of the discrepancy but this man was convinced we were making off with toilet paper to bankrupt him.

So he implemented what he believed to be an entirely reasonable response to this base treachery. We were allowed to have one roll of toilet paper. At any given time, one roll was permitted to us. This was so transparently unhinged that we protested but he insisted. If we were low on toilet paper we needed to call him to drop off a roll that he brought from his home. Smiling jovially, he assured us he lived so close by that it would be no problem!

When we needed to call him often for more he started tearing his hair out. What were we using toilet paper for?! Why wasn’t his genius plan to stop our scandalous waste working??!

Finally, the manager, the only man on staff had to pull the owner aside and be like, “Look, man, their bladders are smaller. They need to wipe every time they pee. They need to pee even more on their period. Is this really the hill you want to die on?”

Yes. It was. The manager was fired unrelated reasons and denounced as a traitor. The toilet paper ration lasted until I quit and probably until the store closed six months later.

[thursdaynights]

This moment during the briefing s e n t me

[arminsumi]

growing up with gojo satoru.

NOTE: it's a trash draft abt growing up with gojo and he had a crush on u since ever or smth idk i think it's a potential backstory for a fic?? 👍🗑️

you and satoru have known each other since you were toddlers because the gojo family and your family are very close. he was born just two years after you.

growing up, he was the richest and snobbiest and snottiest. but he could be charming if he needed to be. formal when he needed to be. just not to you, his closest friend. his only friend growing up.

satoru greatly enjoyed picking on you. he annoyed you to death. chasing you down the halls while your parents had tea together. tripping you. ruffling your hair. stealing your sweets and putting them above his head once he had hit that big growth spurt and you could no longer reach them. "accidentally" spilling tea all over your new kimonos. bringing bugs to you just to freak you out.

but that was just all the annoying childhood memories that you dwelled on. if you asked your parents, you'd hear stories of how you and satoru were inseparable; jointed at the hip, the one never strayed too far from where the other was. where you went, he followed without missing a step and vice versa. often you'd be holding hands without realizing. you remember your grandparents laughing and teasing the two of you about that many times, and then you and satoru would throw each other disgusted looks and let go of each other's hands — only to resume that fingerlocking a few minutes later. it was subconscious for him to stick so close to you.

dwelling on the bad memories detracted you from remembering all the good memories.

the times satoru comfortingly slept at your side when you stayed the night during a thunderstorm at his house. all the times he stood up for you and faced off with that brat sukuna. how suguru would console and hug you while satoru threw fists with the other boy; always, always emerging victorious and bearing a triumphant, almost cocky smirk at you. albeit with blood dribbling out of his nose. you remember sukuna always picking on you, but not in the way satoru did; he had a malicious way about it, but satoru's teasing was playful and even cute. he was tasteful with his jokes, never falling victim to crudeness or vulgarity, never genuinely offending you.

and satoru's mother really liked to bring up that satoru had a "boyish crush" on you around the ages 10 - 14. she mentioned it at dinner all the time, when he was reaching the ages of 16 - 18 it really annoyed him.

"i did not have a crush on bugface." he would always deny it. ah, that ancient nickname, the one that still got on your nerves. and it came to be all because a bug landed on your cheek one day at the riverbank and you didn't notice until satoru pointed it out and burst with laughter.

satoru was gifted. you know, a child prodigy. he was the strongest. and growing up with him, he always used his gifts and strength to protect and care for you, whether it was physically or mentally. throwing fists with people who picked on you, acting like your bodyguard at times even if a boy simply wanted to ask you out on a date. studying with you until you aced your papers so that the both of you could go to the same high prestigious high schools.

albeit he was a bit enigmatic with how he showed his care. it was in the little things. helping you out the river when you fell in when you were twelve, confronting sukuna while you cried in suguru's arms about what he had said about your family, or picking blossoms out your hair.

that last one was something he continued to do through his whole life. whenever a blossom or leaf tangled into your hair, or got caught on your clothes, satoru would very gently pluck it off. he did it so smoothly that you never noticed he was doing it. though sometimes, you'd look at him suspiciously and ask why he was standing so close to you. he'd flick his brows up and hum "nothing."

[griefabyss69]

Rituals

Written for @steddiemicrofic!

[ AO3 ] [ Tips post ]

‘PIN’ wc: 388 | rated: M | cw: They're fiiighttiiinnng~ (it gets gay don't worry)

My take on a classic!!!

Steve's knee is between Eddie's thighs but it's not like that.

His hands engulf Eddie's, pin them above his head—not in that way.

Their faces are close, breath mingling, panting as they try to catch it, but, again—it's not what it looks like.

Even though Eddie's shirt has been scraped up to his armpits, even though Steve's lips are wet with spit, even though Eddie can feel his heartbeat in his dick.

"Say it again, I dare you," Steve threatens, softened by the way he's still breathless.

Eddie would, he'd spit it right back in his face, but he can't remember what he’d said, all he can think about is his hope that Steve doesn't look down or press in harder or read his mind and figure out what this is all doing to him.

Visually it reads like a fantasy he'd have while in class back when they were in school. In reality, he thinks he'd maybe get his face punched in if Steve caught wind of anything going on inside of him right now.

Still, he can't keep his mouth shut, that'd be letting him win.

"Make me," he says in the snottiest voice he’s got, grinning at him.

Steve stops for a moment, confused, though his fingers tighten between Eddie's instead of loosen.

"Why would I make you say something I don't want you to?" He asks, and Eddie sighs, rolls his eyes at him.

"So we can keep fighting, dumbass, obviously you're really into it," he says, bluffing his way between danger and trouble like a motorcycle speeding down the interstate during heavy traffic.

Steve's mouth drops open with the intent to speak, he’s clearly offended, but he's got nothing to say to that. It makes Eddie lift one of his thighs just to see, curious.

"Hey! Watch it!" He yells, and at first Eddie only finds disappointment, until Steve goes to shift away and it makes Eddie's leg brush against the inside of his thigh.

Oh shit. Bingo.

"What, you want me to watch your dick, Harrington? All you had to do was ask," he says, wrinkling his nose at him. "Didn't have to pin me all hot and heavy like this."

"Fuck," Steve hisses, and shoves into him with his whole fucking body. "Shut up."

Eddie laughs, licks his teeth.

"Make me."