#so asking the author themself doesn't seem like a good idea

[popkin16]

wayback appears to have Some of rainjoys' mpreg verse but not all of it, and im still running down the list of fma fics from her. the fic list is on wayback, it just appears to be a task of finding out what is saved there and what isnt

I compiled what I could of the mpreg verse here. I know there's some chunks missing though - like, the wayback machine would have "part one", but not "part two", so I didn't add the fic to the google document at all. I'll have to check their master list to see what else I can get...

I'd love to get

'Interlude With Bomb', '

'Two Kinds of People' (I have the two sequels already)

'Asleep and Dreaming/Good Night' (I also have parts 1, 2, and 4 of this series already)

'The Last Day in the Life of Alphonse Elric',

'Love is like Jazz'

I'm missing more than those, but those are the ones I'm like SOMEONE PLEASE HELP

[autistichalsin]

A fic writer's guide to leaving comments

I'm sure you've seen posts from fic writers expressing dismay at the death of feedback culture, and especially lamenting the phenomenon of people making private Discord servers to share fic recs, so that instead of having a chance to stumble on nice comments in the wild on Tumblr, Twitter, etc, fic writers are increasingly less likely to see good comments left about their work.

I also see the comments on those same posts flooded with people with concerns about commenting, so I am writing this as a guide for those new or unsure.

Firstly: some of you are probably asking, "why do fanfic writers need feedback at all? Shouldn't they be writing just for themselves?"

Well... No. Not really. People can and should create things for themself, yes, but that doesn't mean "continue to post content when no one seems to be engaging." Imagine cooking for someone who eats in utter silence and never says a single word about the meal. Imagine putting on a concert and receiving not a single applause, a cheer, nothing at all. It sounds utterly horrifying, doesn't it? Maybe even humiliating?

Writing for oneself means that positive reviews shouldn't be the sole factor in deciding whether to write/post/continue a story, not that a writer should feel obligated to write thousands of words for a story no one really reacts to in any way, especially when the writer sees creators of similar content (edits, fanarts, fanvids, fansongs, etc) get praised effusively for their work without this expectation being placed on them. It is very rare that artists are told they should draw for themselves the way fic writers are.

Further, and this may be a hot take, but I actually don't think it's inherently wrong to make positive reviews the main or even sole reason for writing or making art to begin with. People like being praised for things they do well. It's one of the most basic parts of human psychology. Human beings want to be praised, encouraged, validated, and celebrated sometimes; why do you think we celebrate birthdays? It's not egotistical. It might, perhaps, be setting oneself up for disappointment, but there's nothing inherently wrong with it, anyway.

Basically, all that to say: it's nice to tip your Uber drivers and baristas. It's nice to thank/compliment your spouse when they make you dinner. And it's nice to thank fan artists and fanfic writers when they make arts/fics that you enjoy.

Moving on: I also know some of you have some specific things you worry or are confused about, and those things might be stopping you from leaving feedback. So here is an FAQ of sorts:

Q: What if the story has a lot of chapters/the author has written many stories? Won't it be weird to go and leave so many comments on them?

A: You definitely can review only the latest chapter/fic and future installments if you so choose, but for the record, fanfics aren't like Instagram/Facebook; mass-commenting and kudosing old stories and chapters isn't seen as stalkerish. It's seen as a sign you're enjoying the content we made. Think of it this way: if a new Star Wars came out, and you were new to Star Wars, it would only make sense for you to go and watch (and post about) the previous movies, right?

Q: What if I don't know what to say?

A: That's perfectly okay! I have a guide at the bottom of this post if you need some ideas. But honestly, writers would rather a single ♥️ than nothing at all, so if you really can't think of anything, that's a good last resort.

Q: I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing and upsetting the writer.

A: There is almost no chance that you will say the wrong thing, unless you are giving unasked-for criticism (see below).

Q: What if I don't like the fic? Should I still comment?

A: No, it's definitely better to silently move on when you didn't enjoy it at all.

Note that while in the past, giving criticism was common practice, this has generally become less of something authors enjoy over time (perhaps tied in with the general lack of feedback; getting fewer comments in general can make it far more frustrating to get critical ones). If you are close to the writer, or if the criticism is just a SPAG issue, you can try asking the writer if they'd like to hear it, but otherwise, leave it be unless the author has indicated somewhere they're open to it. But please be nice. Anything you wouldn't say to an artist, don't do to a writer, please.

Q: In the past, I commented and the writer got mad at me.

A: If you weren't leaving unasked-for criticism, then likely the problem was that particular author. Don't let it deter you from commenting on others. Every group of people has assholes, including writers.

Q: I saw an author who requested no comments on their fic/turned off comments on their fic.

A: Not every writer ultimately DOES want comments, though the majority do. Likely that person was having anxiety, or had recently been harassed/received rude comments and didn't want to bother with it.

Q: An author limited comments to registered users only.

A: See above; likely they did this either as a harassment mitigation member or to prevent minors from reading their fics, especially if it was an NSFW work.

Q: I saw a note that a writer had "enabled comment moderation" on their story. Does that mean they don't want me to comment?

A: Not at all! It means they likely have been harassed/received rude comments, or have reason to fear they will (I.E. have recently posted a story dealing controversial themes, or have received such comments on other sites), and are activating a setting where you can comment, but they need to manually approve the comment before it shows up, which will prevent nasty comments from being read. In these cases, a nice comment might actually mean even more to them, because it shows they have support- so by all means, show them some extra love!

Q: Are there any cases where I shouldn't comment?

A: Yes, but these are mostly individual cases, not a hard rule. In addition to the circumstances listed above (author preference or leaving a negative comment), please do not comment if you are a minor and the fic is rated higher than teen (you shouldn't be reading these to begin with, but if you are, please don't make it obvious you did so), or conversely, if you write higher-than-teen-rated fics and the fic is written by a minor. Also, if the author has blocked you on other platforms, do not comment, as this is block evasion.

Q: Is it okay to comment just to ask for an update/to prompt another fic?

A: It depends largely on context, tone, etc. "I hope this updates soon" is 100% fine. Guilt trippy messages, like "it's been two years, I know you have been going through a lot but you have an obligation to your readers" are NEVER okay. Similarly, with prompts, saying "I hope you explore (thing) one day" is fine, especially if you know the author, but if your first comment to them ever is requesting a fic for a completely different scenario, ship, etc than they wrote, with little or nothing about the actual fic you're replying to, it will come across as rude.

Q: Is it okay to ask an author for permission to translate the fic into another language or make another derivative work?

A: Absolutely, but not every author will want this to be done, and you need to be prepared to respect their no if they give one. Think of it like asking a restaurant for one of their recipes. Some will happily give it out, others consider it a personal/guarded secret.

That said, do not even dare ask about feeding the work to an AI. Fanfic writers DO NOT want AI touching their work. Same for artists. Yes, this includes trying to make an ending for an abandoned fic. Do not do it.

Q: The author of this fic has held their story "hostage" by refusing to update until they get a certain number of reviews. What should I do?

A: This is a hard one. Of course, no one owes an author reviews, and this sort of thing is considered cringey, and endlessly mocked, for a reason. However, please try to do some perspective-taking and practicing empathy here. Authors are having to put out PSAs on this site and others just to try and get people to engage with their content. Imagine being a musician, getting on stage, performing song after song, and being met with silence, or maybe a single courtesy golf clap here or there. You'd start to doubt yourself, wouldn't you? You might feel inclined to stop playing unless you start getting an indication people actually care about your music, because performing to utter silence is absolutely humiliating. The manner of doing so is all wrong in this case, but try to show a bit of compassion, and imagine how awful, how utterly crushed the author must have been to do this in the first place.

It is definitely your right to not engage with the fic/author anymore, especially if you had been reviewing before the fic got taken 'hostage' and felt the author wasn't grateful for your comments. But if you wanted to be especially kind, you could take some time to try and lift the author up instead, and show them that even if others are not leaving comments, the fic ultimately does mean something to you. It just might be enough for the author to rethink their position.

Q: Why isn't a kudos enough?

A: It's not that a kudos isn't enough, per se: we all enjoy getting likes. But to continue my metaphor above, well... when you perform music, a cheer does feel very different than a courtesy golf clap, you know? You appreciate the golf claps, they are very kind and always welcome, but cheers, "YEAH!"s, and such are what you really live for. And a standing ovation? That could literally change your entire opinion on your art.

Q: I want to leave a comment, but I'm really scared/don't know how/don't know what to say.

A: That's totally okay. Below, I give some ideas of what to say, but keep in mind that if you really don't know what to say, emoji are totally fine! A ♥️ is still really great and will make us smile. Put some keysmashes! Put in just a ton of exclamation points and nothing else! "AHHH OMG!" Those are all perfectly fine!

BUT, if you want to leave something a little more in-depth, here are some great places to start! Trust me, fanfic writers LOVE all of these and would be delighted to get these comments.

ASK QUESTIONS! "Does this mean x?" or "I'm curious, when x said y, is that a sign that z is at play?"

Tell us how you felt while reading the story/chapter. If we made you cry in a particularly sad scene, PLEASE TELL US FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! WE LOVE THAT!

If you are in a Discord or other space that's talking about the story, tell us what you/your mutuals/your friends are saying about it. This is a great idea for if you don't know what to say! Even just a "we never shut up about this fic in the Discord" is wonderful to hear.

Tell us what drew you in to the fic (did you like the summary? Was it recced somewhere?) and what made you stay.

Say something you found unique/intriguing about the fic. Maybe you liked the characterization, or the author did a really good job of setting the scene. Let them know!

Make a personal connection to the text, especially if the author wrote something that felt very real to your lived experience.

YELL IN ALL CAPS THAT YOU WANT TO HURT THE VILLAIN OR HUG THE SUFFERING WOOBIE OR SMACK THE MAIN PAIRING FOR BEING OBLIVIOUS ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS!

If this story has changed something for you, tell us. If it changed how you see a character, made you ship a ship you never thought of before, changed how you see canon, opened your eyes to a societal issue, gave you a line you think about a lot- please tell us!

Indulgently play along with our cliffhangers. Pretend you don't know that the character will be fine. Pretend that we would actually do it and you're SO SCARED RN for this character.

Wanna know a secret? Wanna know a writer's catnip? Want to know an instant way to make a writer print out your comment for motivation to read later? Quote/paraphrase/reference a bit of text that you loved and tell us your exact thoughts and emotions on it, why you loved it, etc. Quote half the damn chapter back at us in the comments and we will probably propose marriage to you on the spot tbh.

Remember, if you truly can't think of anything to say, just a single emoji still does wonders!!

Hope this guide helps! Happy commenting!

[bi-bard]

You’re Lying, Summer Child - Hannibal Lecter Imagine (Hannibal)

Title: You’re Lying, Summer Child

Pairing: Hannibal Lecter X Reader

Based On: Summer Child

Word Count: 870 words

Warning(s): mentions of past trauma

Summary: Hannibal investigates the true source of why the usually cheery (Y/n) is that way. Nothing is exactly how it seems.

Author's Note: I had to rewrite this whole thing because my dog stepped on my keyboard and somehow deleted the whole thing the first time and I couldn't get it back.

Written in the third person

SUPERACHE - CONAN GRAY WRITING CHALLENGE MASTERLIST

---------------------------

Hannibal should've felt guilty.

Truly, he should've.

The idea of shattering someone's perception of themself and the world around them should cause some level of guilt. Because the world isn't black and white. You can think making someone confront their pain is the right choice but getting them to do that can cause pain. The idea of causing that pain should make someone hesitate.

Not for Hannibal.

Hannibal didn't tend to think about things like that. Curiosity commonly takes the place of what would be defined as right.

(Y/n) had always been the kind to take care of everyone around them. Kind, helpful, forgiving. Almost any kind word could be used to describe them. And (Y/n) would live up to that reputation with a smile on their face.

Nothing caught Hannibal's attention quite like that idea. The smile. Permanent smile. He didn't believe it. Something was there. Hidden just behind the eyes.

"Hannibal?"

He looked up from his desk when a voice filled the office. He turned to face (Y/n), whose head was just peeking through the doorway.

"Sorry," they said.

"No need," Hannibal walked over to guide (Y/n) inside. He shut the door behind them. "I meant to meet you at the door, but I got distracted by this file."

"That one you wanted a second opinion on," they asked. He nodded.

"I blocked the name," he explained. "I just want to know what you think."

(Y/n) nodded, taking the file from him.

They read of a patient that was very clearly falling victim to some people-pleasing behaviors. Countless meetings to help friends, reports of answering non-emergent calls at odd hours of the night, tendency to offer support but not accept it. However, there were no theories of the origins of such behavior.

"Any information on their past," (Y/n) asked, looking back at Hannibal.

"I seem to have trouble getting the patient to discuss the matter," he replied. "How significant do you see it?"

"Oh, extremely," they nodded. "Behavior like this- that's this intense- doesn't just happen without the parents or someone in their early life teaching it to them."

"How so?"

"Emotionally distant parents, parents that placed conditions on love, people showing them that their needs matter more than this patient's," (Y/n) listed. "Take your pick, really."

"This patient," Hannibal hesitated for a moment, eyes studying (Y/n)'s frame. Their back was facing him now, focused on the papers. "Is from a small town, grew up in a complete household, reporting a normal life."

"Well, it can't be completely normal if this behavior had come out."

(Y/n) turned around and saw Hannibal staring at them. They furrowed their eyebrows.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're studying me."

Hannibal seemed to ignore the question. "What do you think is the most likely cause?"

"I can't say if I don't have the history," (Y/n) replied. "Why did you ask for my help on this?"

"I see your intelligence and gentle approach as a good fit to look at this case."

"I don't believe you."

Hannibal wasn't a fan of the look that crossed over their face. A frown with their eyebrows furrowed. Suspicious but nonconfrontational.

Still, he refused to step back.

"What do you think it is then," he asked, stepping forward.

"I... I don't..."

Hannibal tilted his head forward a bit, one eyebrow barely raising at them. (Y/n) looked down at the file.

"This is how you see me, isn't it," they asked.

Hannibal's back straightened as the question came out of their mouth. And his goal was revealed.

"Oh my God," they muttered.

They walked closer to Hannibal, pushing the file back toward him. He took it from their hands.

"That's... That's evil," they continued. "You don't get to dissect my life story. Speculate about my past."

"I did no such thing. You did."

(Y/n)'s jaw tightened before they looked down.

"You've been lying," he said. "Not to just those around you, but to yourself. You need to acknowledge what happened."

"Stop it," they muttered.

It was the first time that Hannibal could say that he heard genuine anger come out in their voice. But he didn't react to it. He just continued talking.

"You can't repress it all forever," he only would've stopped talking if (Y/n) had walked out of the room. But they didn't. "Your current behavior has become harmful to you. Destructive kindness. Finding the cause of that behavior will make it easier to deconstruct."

He placed the file back on his desk before going to stand right in front of (Y/n). He held out a hand to them.

They stared at his hand for a moment, feeling tears fill their eyes.

"I am only trying to help," he said quietly. "But you have to let me."

(Y/n) wiped their eyes, looking away from him completely.

Hannibal was going to speak again but didn't have the chance to. Before another word could be said, (Y/n) quickly moved forward and hugged Hannibal tightly. Hannibal only froze for a moment before hugging them back.

Now, he could properly play the role of the concerned friend. He could have a cover for his curiosity.

Now, he could find the answers that he wanted.

---------------------------

Masterlist (Includes links to All Writing Challenges)

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[gayrobos]

i would fucking love to read your author's-commentary on the stunticon friends comics! maybe not like in the individual update posts but i know spoilers don't really stop me from enjoying anything and it'd be cool to hear about the stuff that can't quite be shown yet :D

WELL OKAY IF YOU INSIST hehe. it's mostly thoughts about people's relationships. and a lot of it is thoughts about people's relationships with motormaster. a nice relaxing 1.5k of authors notes which doesn't contain spoilers for future plot per se.

I kind of think of this comic as being about... what is decepticon culture, and how does it impact people who've been in it and also their adopted human teen. I've joked that the reason the stunticons are here on earth is because they joined the "kick around people who are weaker than you" faction and they were shocked, SHOCKED when someone stronger than them started kicking them around. so they went to a place where nobody's stronger than them ::)

mikki, meanwhile, is in a super weird place about this because they're. not actually strong at all. EXCEPT when they're with the stunticons. so they have this mindset that they're top dog and they can do anything they want but that's not going to be true if they actually leave and they do know this. they know that if they want to maintain the power they have they need to stay with these people who seemed so normal to them and who they are realizing are seriously not normal. who are frightening. who have never been what they seemed to mikki. it makes a teen ask some questions! or stubbornly refuse to ask themself any questions!

the stunticons of course also refuse to do any amount of self-examination. they came out here to do nothing more and nothing less than have a good time at other people's expense. but they're each deeply neurotic in their own special ways, largely but not exclusively because of their time under motormaster's command.

wildrider has always been Like that. as in, needs a lot of stimulation or she will rip up the furniture and chew through someone's face. putting her under the command of a huge control freak like motormaster was kind of a dumb idea, because they were constantly butting heads. except motormaster is four times wildrider's size and can squish her like a toyota corolla. thankfully wildrider has never ever learned a lesson in her life and just kept on antagonizing motormaster forever until she got sick of being beat up for ignoring orders and wandering off to shred things and. you know. impaled her. basically wildrider's injuries were purely physical because she wasn't that afraid of the consequences of defying motormaster or more broadly decepticon command. nobody else got off that easy. (EDIT: I completely forgot to mention how ashamed wildrider is of every time she made a compromise for the sake of her safety. which wasn't all the time, but she sees it as cowardice, not self-preservation. she HAS been altered by motormaster; it showed her a side of herself she hates and now she's got to be even more recklessly aggressive to prove she's not a coward.)

dead end has spent a long time making herself into a tool to be wielded. if you never expect anything good to happen you can't be disappointed! and this doesn't extend just to motormaster, you know? the entire decepticon army runs on "shut up, do what you're told, perform viciousness." wildrider is in some ways the perfect decepticon. dead end sucks at it, but she CAN shut up and do what she's told. she's very good at killing people but she doesn't much like it. I think motormaster has probably told her a lot of times that she's only good for one thing and she's not that good at it. she really really longs to connect with people but she's also terrified of it (for good reason, since she's gotten burned a lot) and in the present she's still pretty withdrawn even from the other stunticons. mikki felt like a safer option because they're just a little alien and if we feed them and tame them they won't be able to leave! and then: uh-oh. dead end caught feelings. she should know better by now.

breakdown, we haven't seen that much of her being neurotic because she's been in a really safe place for four years. the humans can't touch her. she doesn't have to leave her ship. she doesn't even have to talk to the other stunticons if she doesn't want to, mostly. historically she has been a LOT weirder. and we'll see some of that soon ::) to motormaster she was suuuuch an easy target for isolation. you can tell her to always stay in the comms room and she'll just do it! you can tell the rest of your crew to play pranks on her and gaslight her and they will because it's funny and you're decepticons! you can tell her in private that it was their idea! to breakdown, motormaster is THE number one trustworthy person. which isn't to say that breakdown doesn't fear her, it's just that motormaster can't "betray" you. what would that mean. it's meaningless. this is part of why I'm so insane about wildbreak. breakdown is like, yeah, wildrider is violent and kind of unpredictable and she thinks it's funny to torment me, AND she keeps trying to get me to break the rules. the only way to deal with this is to play along enough to get her to keep it a secret. and also she's hot and I desperately want to hurt someone because I feel so angry and helpless all the time. like! the only person breakdown trusts is also the implicit threat whenever she's with wildrider??? the only connection she'll allow herself to have is with someone she truly dislikes and who has never treated her well! neither of them can ever admit they care about each other as more than fight club buddies because their affection is all twisted up in hatred and their clashing personalities and the way they've been intentionally set against each other!!! AUGH

post-motormaster they just hit each other and have sex like regular people. but watch out!

okay and finally we come to drag strip. who as I'm sure you've noticed needs desperately to be liked by everyone and for nobody to be mad at her specifically and also each other. this is a terrible coping mechanism for dealing with motormaster, but it's the one she developed! and it kind of fucked her over because at the crucial moment she didn't join in on killing motormaster. her loyalties were very much divided between the one person who was most important to make happy and the people she intellectually knew were on her side. and now she's always going to be the one who didn't want motormaster dead. and she's always going to be thinking about how everyone else is thinking that. but everything's fine as long as they still laugh at her jokes.

it's been SO fun to plot out the stunticons falling the fuck apart because the foundation of their trust in each other has always been rotten. house of robot usher over here. there's a lot of decepticons out here who feel genuine camaraderie despite (because of!) the way that their military culture encourages them to turn on anyone who isn't performing decepticonness well enough, but, um, that's not the stunticons. living and fighting together for thousands of years just gave them a LOT of beef to pretend they don't have with each other. despite themselves they do all genuinely care for mikki, but their model for caring about someone is "war buddy" which kinda comes down to "do fun shit with them and save their life." and none of them have the capacity to admit (even to themselves) that they have real feelings for someone!! that would be seriously uncool and not macho et c. so you get situations like mikki passive-aggressively going WOW NOBODY HERE CARES ABOUT ME OR EVEN THINKS I'M A PERSON! and getting crickets in response.

whew.

okay, what about motormaster? what's her deal?

funnily enough I've not done that much development on her since she's barely gotten any screentime. so some of what I'm saying here is solidifying for the first time. (I don't really write a lot of notes, just scripts.) like I said, she's a control freak. and an egotist. she needs to claim credit for the victories of everyone under her command, and she's a pretty fucking bad leader which is why she only has four subordinates. but she's unbelievably effective on the battlefield, and that ability transfers well to menasor. a win for the decepticons. truly, what is there to say about her? in this story she's defined by what she does to other people. I won't get into the metaphors that we'll see in stunticomix endgame (teehee), but from a narrative point of view she's literally nothing without them. she's more the spectre of decepticon culture than she is a person, yk?

so the stakes of this story are: can the stunticons overcome millennia of indoctrination, abuse, and generally sucking in order to have a genuine relationship with like 1 person who doesn't have that baggage? can they allow themselves to care about ANYTHING? originally the script I wrote (with arcee's help <3 hi arcee) calls for the answer to be yes, they can pledge themselves to a cause they decided for themselves and yes they can build a community. but you know what? reading all this shit it's really hard to believe that they can do any of that. VOTE IN THE REPLIES will y'all be mad at me if this turns out to be a tragedy. lmao.

[hello-that-happened]

How She-Ra, Wrong Hordak, and I Deconverted in Six Steps

Alright y'all, it's time for my fourth essay exploring how She-Ra and the Princess of Power (SPOP) used Christian themes and parallels to provide a humanist message.

My first post named 9 major messages of SPOP that contradict Christian fundamentalism.

My second gave the historical context of how our generation and Noelle's are growing up to overthrow Christian fundamentalism after it became such a powerful enemy in the U.S.

My third discussed the parallel between Horde Prime’s rage at Hordak’s self-naming and the Christian idea that everyone is an instrument of God’s will.

Now I want to discuss how Adora's and Wrong Hordak's journeys defections from the Horde parallel my story, and potentially others', of leaving Christianity. Adora and Wrong Hordak experience many of the same stages in his journey out of the Horde as many ex-Christians experience leaving Christianity.

My own experience leaving Christianity was a journey into atheism, so I will interpret Adora's and Wrong Hordak's stories through that lens. Plenty of people who left toxic/conservative Christianity behind still believe in God, in heaven, and/or in the value of Christian communities. I do not want to minimize or dismiss their experiences, and I welcome progressive Christians as allies in the fight for LGBT+ rights and social justice generally. But when I watched Adora and Wrong Hordak leave their belief in The Horde behind, I saw myself leaving Christianity behind. I want to tell my story through/alongside theirs. I hope some of you can relate, but it is okay if you cannot, regardless of your religious beliefs or lack thereof.

Deconversion in Fast-Forward

Adora, Wrong Hordak, and I escaped from the organizations that raised us and its worldview in six somewhat-distinct stages:

Multiple major characters' arcs in She-Ra begin with rethinking their loyalty to The Horde. Wrong Hordak and Adora both lose their faith in The Horde after a lifetime of indoctrination into its ideals and goals. Their journey away from The Horde mirrors many young Americans' away from Christianity, with at least one notable exception: time. Deconversion takes multiple years for most ex-Christians, but only takes a few days for Adora and Wrong Hordak. Their de-conversion basically represents a speed run of most ex-Christians'.

Full Breakdown of Each Stage

(tw: mention of depression and suicidal ideation)

Adora takes delight in pretending to beat up an imaginary princess in the show's first scene, and later calls princesses "violent instigators who don't even know how to control their powers." She believes in the ideals of The Horde, and feels excited to rise through the ranks to become Force Captain. Obedience to Horde authorities comes fairly naturally to her, and she even chides Catra for being "disrespectful."

Wrong Hordak consistently repeats his loyalty to Horde Prime throughout his first episode and beyond. Even while being attacked by his fellow clones, Wrong Hordak affirms that "We serve Horde Prime's will." Unprompted in the next episode he happily announces, "I believe in Horde Prime!"

I felt proud, as a kid in Sunday School, that I could answer more questions about the Bible than any of the other kids. My church's youth group was the most enjoyable part of my middle school years especially because I got to hang out with the guy I only recently realized I'd had a huge gay crush on. I started viewing "feeling happy" and "feeling the presence of God" as identical. I wrote in my 2011 "Faith Statement" for my church's Confirmation that "I fell in love with God," and that "I thank God that I was born into a good Christian family and was raised to honor God."

Adora is kidnapped by the Horde's enemies and taken away from her home, separated from all of the voices reassuring her that The Horde is a good organization with a just mission. Shadow Weaver is not around to give her orders or map out her future anymore, leaving her alone with her enemies and her thoughts.

Wrong Hordak's connection to the hive-mind he knew for all of his life is severed. "I am…alone?" he asks in shock, then breaks down and cries, "I am alone!" For someone who grew up living in the same mind as his entire communal "family," suddenly losing that connection to everyone he knew would be traumatizingly shocking. The best equivalent I can think of in human experience is being suddenly ripped away from your family and community and then never seeing them again.

I kept conflating happiness with my faith in God for years, even after my crush moving away drove me into suicidal ideation for a couple weeks in 2011. My mental health recovered for a year before settling into a long-term depression in 2012. Because I conflated happiness with the presence of God, my depression felt like something had taken away the presence of God.

Adora defends the organization that raised her by quoting her highest authority: "Hordak says we're doing what's best for Etheria. We're trying to make things better. More orderly." Glimmer argues against Adora's worldview by showing her (1) that princesses are just people instead of dangerous violent monsters, and (2) what The Horde has done: first the ruins of a village destroyed by The Horde, and then that the village of Thaymor which she was told to attack was peaceful, innocent, and happy.

Wrong Hordak grabs Entrapta by the hair for the crime of "trespassing," and enjoys saying, "Prime shall hear of this, and his punishment shall be merciless." But once Bow’s arrow disconnects him from the Horde’s hivemind, he is simultaneously stranded away from the people who constantly reinforced his belief in Horde Prime’s goodness and stuck with a group of people opposing Prime. For a long time, Wrong Hordak simply pretends that the Best Friend Squad™ serve Horde Prime just like everyone else he ever knew. Every line of his dialogue in “Taking Control” is a quick, snappy motto he took from Horde propaganda, like “I believe…in Horde Prime” and “True nourishment comes from the favor of Horde Prime.” [see footnote 1]

I was well aware, growing up in a progressive suburb, that plenty of my high school friends were nonreligious. After my depression sunk in, I found myself arguing about religion with a brilliant but very smug British friend who consistently refuted my arguments in ways I could not dispute. Searching for arguments to support my pre-existing beliefs, I started reading Christian apologetics, but found nothing my friends could not easily refute. [see footnote 2]

Adora sees the ruins of the site of a Horde attack while with Glimmer and Bow, and at first rejects what Glimmer tells her about what she sees to preserve her worldview: "This doesn't make any sense. The Horde would never do something like this…You don't know them like I do." But when she sees The Horde attack Thaymor, the belief system painstakingly constructed by The Horde and drilled into her over 15 (or so) years comes crashing down. At first she can rationalize away her experiences to preserve her beliefs, but when the evidence of her own senses becomes overwhelming she cannot resolve the cognitive dissonance between her belief in The Horde's goodness and her direct experience of The Horde attacking the innocent town of Thaymor. Her worldview cannot explain what she experienced.

Wrong Hordak keeps his belief in Horde Prime's all-powerful nature for a long time after joining the Best Friend Squad. However, when until the Best Friend Squad catches him in a contradiction. He tells them what he was told: that Krytis does not exist. As soon as they start questioning the contradiction he was fed, he becomes extremely uncomfortable. He maintains his denial of Krytis' existence even after they land on the planet, until he can no longer deny the evidence that Horde Prime is not all-powerful.

I grew up, like many of you, on the Internet. My depression began during the heyday of the online atheist movement—and by “heyday,” I mean “seemingly inescapable presence,” especially on YouTube where I hung out. I kept running into comments asking questions that I could not answer: Why does Christianity seem to promote belief based on internal feelings instead of observable evidence? Why would an all-loving god send anyone to hell forever? Why did I believe claims from Christian doctrine and doubt claims from every other religion? Why has Christianity seemed to cling to the past instead of embracing a progressive future? The questions overwhelmed me. I found myself terrified of my own growing doubts. Eventually, my belief was based entirely on two emotions: nostalgia for past happy experiences I associated with Christianity, and a fear of losing the vague hope those experiences gave me.

The first time that Bow and Glimmer met Adora, they immediately labeled her “Horde soldier!,” and the label stuck through the first three episodes. Adora has always identified herself primarily as a soldier serving The Horde, echoing the messages she has heard for her whole life: “Shadow Weaver said it didn't matter who I was before, that—that I was nothing before Hordak took me in.” The language of “I was nothing” reflects cult dynamics where a group tries to retain someone permanently by making them think of themself as nothing more than their worshipful loyalty to the group. Similarly, it is a common Christian belief that “without Jesus we are nothing.”

After realizing that Horde Prime fes him lies, Wrong Hordak collapsed into a sobbing mess. “Who am I if not an exalted brother of Prime?,” he bawled, still thinking that the only legitimate kind of identity is one based on fully devoted worship of an all-powerful authority. Per Entrapta, “It seem[ed] that Wrong Hordak has begun to question the meaning of life.” She later described Wrong Hordak’s breakdown as an “existential crisis,” which happens “when individuals question whether their lives have meaning, purpose, or value, and are negatively impacted by the contemplation.” Without an all-powerful father figure to value him, Wrong Hordak thought, who would?

I identified myself fundamentally as a Christian for my entire childhood and teen years. I found joy, purpose, and a sense of self in my religion. Leaving my religion behind felt like burning the bridge to who I was behind me. When I de-converted from Christianity, I felt like I was standing at the brink of a void. I thought that without finding goodness in God, I might find no goodness at all. [see footnote 3]

When Wrong Hordak finishes (digitally, but also emotionally) processing the Krytis data logs of Horde Prime leaving in defeat, he explicitly renounces his old loyalties and declares his opposition to the organization and beliefs that he used to believe in with all his heart: "Brothers! Horde Prime lied to us. He is a false ruler. We must rise up against him, and free the universe from his unjust reign!"

After Adora betrays the Horde at the Battle of Thaymor, she pledges her loyalty to Bright Moon in her battle against the Horde: "I’ve seen for myself the atrocities the Horde has committed against the people of Etheria, and I’m ready to fight to stop them. If you give me the chance, I know I can help the Rebellion turn the tide of the war."

I didn't have an explicit declaration statement like Wrong Hordak or Adora. However, on 5/5/15 I arranged a meeting with my very friendly and understanding youth pastor as a last-ditch effort to save my faith. I hoped that he would crush my worrying doubts. Instead, actually encouraged me to become agnostic and to look into non-Christian beliefs on the subject of religion. Rather than feeling terrified of what I might find and wishing that someone could indoctrinate me into my old belief system, I started on a path to discover the truth wherever it might lead me.

Footnotes for Context

Christian fundamentalists’ similarly simplistic snappy phrases have been labeled by ex-Christians as “thought-terminating clichés… brief, highly reductive, definitive-sounding phrases” where “Simple labels are attached to something you like or dislike, and they are the start and finish of all thought on the subject.” Such black-and-white “totalistic” thinking is common in Christian fundamentalism, especially how it labels complex political topics as somehow being merely a cover for “spiritual warfare” between the totally good/Godly side and the totally evil/demonic side.

Specifically, I started reading an “Intelligent Design” propaganda apologetics book by Lee Strobel called The Case For A Creator. A self-proclaimed former atheist, Strobel wrote his The Case For series using my same research strategy: Only do research using sources that already agree with you. Whereas Strobel exclusively talked to other Christian apologists, though, I at least tried talking to atheists. Anyway, I walked into school one day with a confident smile and a copy of Strobel’s book and sat down with some friends. One of them, another brilliant atheist but with a far subtler and humbler personality, noticed it and his face immediately sunk into the expression of someone exhausted by the topic as he braced himself for my bullshit. When I confidently asserted a creationist talking point trying to dismiss the findings of some old experiment, he not only knew the experiment but immediately dismantled my talking point. I had no reply. What struck me most was not just his swift rebuttal, but his weary tone: My arguments were not only bad, but so bad that he was genuinely tired of them.

Around the same time, I became obsessed with the character of Kefka from Final Fantasy 6. To me, Kefka represented what I feared most about leaving Christianity behind — that I would lose any sense of meaning, purpose, or morality in my life. ("Life… Dreams… Hope…Where do they come from? And where are they headed? Such meaningless things!") Edgy, I know, but in my mind that kind of absurdism seemed to be an inevitable result of abandoning my religious beliefs. Fortunately, I came to understand that there is plenty of meaning, purpose, beauty, and goodness outside of the particular religion that I happened to be born into.

[sometimesrosy]

Hello! Do you happen to know any prompt generators? I'm trying to write my main project but have been feeling blocked. Some authors actually say they immediately switch to another project when they start feeling "weird", for a few hours or for the whole day, and then they can come back to their main project with no block at all. I have all the characters and relationships and a part of the plot for the side project but am missing a main plot. So I'm gathering ideas! Thank you!

Hmm. I don't use plot generators because I think I have been randomly picking tropes to move me forward. Oh and I am DEFINITELY using tropes when I ghostwrite. I'm just like, what will happen here? And maybe the client gives me some tropes and maybe I just throw in my own.

Let me put a search into pinterest. I didn't find any in my own pins but there's this from Reedsy:

This one kept popping up. A lot of people seem to like it.

This one has whole bunches of plot generators from characters to worldbuilding to genre specific that you can choose from. Although the one I looked at didn't work. That might just be my internet though.

I actually love using prompts. Because there is no limit to what can happen in a novel, and that can be overwhelming. So to take the challenge of a prompt no longer means that you are struggling to know what to DO, but instead, working to figure out how to fit that prompt into your story.

BUT the reason why I don't use prompt generators for my own work generally is that I want my plot to be guided by my characters needs and goals and flaws and strengths. And while I can often figure out how to do that with generators, it can also take me off track and get me distracted by fun tropes and, like, side quests which don't directly relate to what I'm trying to write.

So how to get the main plot you need?

FIRST you need to figure out what your character's GOAL is. There might be an external goal-- to save the kingdom or get the shipment to the other side of the galaxy without the empire finding out, or to get your crush to fall in love with you, or to solve the murder or escape the murderer or WHATEVER. But there should also be an INTERNAL GOAL. What motivates your main character/s? Is it to find belonging in a family? Is it to make peace with a tragic past? Is it to learn how to love themself? Is it to become strong so no one can hurt you again?

The KEY is to entwine that external goal into the internal goal. The external goal COULD be the antithesis of the internal goal, that would cause a lot of tension. Or it could work with the internal goal. Maybe the heroine's goal of becoming a rock star is going to destroy her inner goal of finding love and acceptance. Or maybe the heroine's goal of learning to become a powerful magic user supports her interior goal of no longer feeling like the weak, powerless orphan. Or not, maybe she thinks it is but really what she needs is to protect others? WHO KNOWS?! That's the fun part actually. Trying to figure out what the characters NEED in order to fulfill the promise of all their struggles.

I guess that's why I don't use prompt generators. Because I want the goals to fulfill the character promises. And yeah I can click a generator enough times to find a prompt that could work. Yeah. That would work. OH, I remember when I was writing fanfic, I would ask people for prompts, and then I would make a list of all the prompts and would CHOOSE the ones that would best fit the story I wanted to tell. SO it wasn't totally random.

As for getting stuck... getting stuck is part of writing. That doesn't mean you need to abandon your story, but it DOES probably mean that there's something you need to address that's not working. The tricky part is figuring out WHAT'S not working. It might very well be something in the story, and if that's the case, you need to go back in your story and figure out WHERE you went off track. If you kept pushing, it might be sentences, paragraphs or even CHAPTERS back. If you are sensitive to that "something's wrong here" feeling, you can start catching it much sooner.

Sometimes you're not stuck because of the story. Sometimes you're stuck because of fear or self esteem or exhaustion or you're disorganized and confused or who knows? Figuring out why you're stuck is one of the challenges of writing.

Good luck and happy writing.