#so i am going to show up right at 7:00 and tell her that being bossed arpund by people who don't even introduce themselves is MY pet peeve

[generalllimaginesss]

"Every morning I question why I moved in with you." Can you write an older Hughes sister one where she moved in with Jack and then Luke when he started with the Devils and they’re always asking her to do things for them. Like waking her up in the morning to make breakfast because only she knows how to make pancakes like their mom used to when they were kids. She pretends to hate it but loves to be able to take care of her baby brothers. I imagine they’d all be obsessed with their sister if they had one.

Hughes sister has a chokehold on me and I make no apologies for it. I hope this is something along the lines of what you were thinking!!

••

It had been a long week at work, major changes in the computer system that your office used was causing you to work overtime, so you looked forward to sleeping in on Saturday.

However, Jim and Ellen both agreed that the youngest Hughes boys could benefit from having their big sister live with them as they adjusted to life without their mom and dad. Luckily you had a job where you could work from home and were able to move to New Jersey with ease. At least with ease regarding your job. Your brothers were anything but ease...

With there being a three year age gap with Jack and four with Luke, they looked up to their big sister, relying on you a little more than they should at their age. Most of the time it didn't bother you, but you just wanted this one morning to yourself.

The sound of pots and pans banging revealed that you had wishful thinking, causing you to groan when you rolled over and saw that it was only 7:00 am.

You could tell that the boys were bickering back and fourth about something, but you would let them work it out like the adults that they were. Or at least the adults that they should be.

The walls weren't thick enough to block their argument out though.

"Dude, no that's not how she did it. She added more flour."

"Are you dumb? We're not making waffles. It doesn't need that much flour."

"Well it doesn't need that much milk. It's pancakes, not soup."

"Go get her, we clearly have no idea what the fuck we're doing."

Footsteps, you determined as Jack's, began to come closer to your room, causing you to put a pillow over your head, wishfully hoping it would suffocate you into a deep sleep that wouldn't be disturbed by your brothers.

Three knocks on your door let you know that your wishful thinking was to no avail. You didn't understand why he even bothered knocking when he barged in and jumped on the bed, landing right on top of you, momentarily knocking the breath out of you.

"Jack, what the actual fuck is wrong with you?!" You yelled, shoving him off the bed, the thud resonating throughout the room.

You watched as he winced in pain, holding his knee as it took the brunt of the fall.

"You realize that I have a job that requires me to be healthy?" He groaned as he stood up, causing you to throw a pillow at him while rolling your eyes.

"Don't jump on me and you wouldn't be in this predicament, now would you?"

"Whatever....me and Luke can't remember how to make mom's pancakes. Can you help with that?" He asked, sitting on the side of your bed and falling back onto you.

"You two are hopeless..." You trailed off as you hit his stomach, trying to get him off of you. He swatted your hand away from his stomach, but moved enough to let you out of bed.

As you walked into the kitchen, Jack trailing closely behind and Luke sitting on a barstool on his phone, you noticed that it was an absolute disaster. There were egg shells scattered across the counter, way more than they should have needed. The flour bag was busted, a trail of flour showed where the boys had carried it around the kitchen. There was now only a half gallon of milk left from a previously unopened jug.

You groaned, wiping the sleep out your eyes as you recalled the way that your mom made pancakes your whole life.

"I feel like kids would be easier to raise than the two of you," You said under your breath, pouring the bowl of goop that the boys made down the drain.

"Jack is supposed to know how to make pancakes," Luke spoke up, not tearing his attention away from his phone.

"You watched her make it the same way we did, Luke," You pointed out.

"Yeah, but I'm the baby. I've got you all to do it for me," He smirked, watching you as your glares sent daggers towards him.

"I don't think the argument of being the baby of the family is valid after the age of 18. If it has to be brought up after that, then something's wrong," You rebutted, measuring out the ingredients and mixing them together.

Jack snorted, finding amusement in his oldest and youngest sibling arguing. He wasn't safe from your attitude though.

"You have no room to be laughing over there, Jack. You're older than him and still have to ask me to cook. It's funny...I've never had to do anything for Quinn," You knew when you said it that they would groan, and they did.

"Why don't you go live with him then?" Jack proposed, trying to sit next to Luke who shoved him away.

"Why the hell would you say that while she's making our pancakes, dude?"

"Trust me, I would get a lot more work done because he wouldn't be bothering me nonstop," You flipped one of the pancakes, a golden brown reflecting back at you.

The three of you were quiet as you finished flipping and plating them. You had made enough for the boys to have three and you two.

"Thank you," Jack snatched the plate from your hands, causing you to snatch them back.

"You will not snatch these from me when you rudely jumped on me at 7 in the morning. Take them nicely. We use easy hands in this house," You didn't budge, not giving him his pancakes until he slowly took the plate back. If looks could kill you would be long gone by the look he was giving you.

"Yeah, Jack, easy hands," Luke mocked, trying to grab the plate you held out to him. You brought it back closer to you and out of his reach, preventing him from grabbing it.

"What do we say?" Talking to him like a child elicited a glare from him as well, but he said his 'thank you' and you gave him his plate.

They ate quickly, mentioning that they were running late for a meeting. When they put their plates in the sink, you realized that they were leaving you with the mess that they had made.

"Who do you two think I am? Your personal maid?" You asked rhetorically.

"Love ya, Sis!" Luke called as he walked out the front door.

Jack didn't bother to say anything, only throwing up a peace sign as he followed Luke.

"Every morning I question why I moved in with you," You muttered under your breath as you rolled your sleeves up to clean the kitchen.

As you went to load the dishwasher, your phone vibrated on the counter, Jack's name flashing across the screen.

"What do you need?" You sighed, knowing he had forgotten something.

"I forgot my suit for the game tonight...can you bring it when you get a chance? Preferably before lunch?" You could hear Luke chuckling in the background.

"What do you say?" You were bound and determined to teach him some manners while staying with them.

"Oh my God, just bring it-"

"Do you want the suit or no? Because I'm not the one that has to wear it tonight..." You trailed off as you rinsed a bowl out before loading it onto the top shelf of the dishwasher.

Jack sighed, causing Luke to laugh.

"My wonderful sister that I love so much, would you do me a favor and please bring me my suit before lunch? With my Air Forces?" Sarcasm seeped from his voice, your eyes rolling in response.

"I don't appreciate the sass, but since you said please I will," He didn't bother saying thank you, hanging up immediately when you finished your sentence. He would learn one day.

You would never admit it to them, but you loved being able to help them. The early mornings and late nights that they caused you were inconvenient in the moment, but you would hate to miss out on the opportunities to spend so much time with them. They were, after all, your baby brothers that you loved so very much.

But unbeknownst to anybody...Quinn was still your favorite.

*

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[hopefulromances]

Long Time Coming I Chapter 13 I The Man

Summary: Being hired as the first female assistant coach in the league was a challenge of it itself. Being a football prodigy and University Football Legend was easy enough. Coaching Jamie Tartt was a challenge all on its own.

Chapter Summary: Reader is given an award. Jamie is supportive

Word Count: 5.2K

Warning: Some sexism hehehe

A/N: Plot plot plot! But there's some of my favorite jamie x reader moments in this one. Next is Amsterdam!!!!

Prologue One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve

I woke up alone. Now this was something I was used to at this point. Ever since Jamie had started doing his early morning runs with Roy, we hadn’t been spending as many nights together. Not that I liked it, but it was something I was getting used to.

My alarm went off at 6:00, as per usual. I did some yoga, showered, then was brushing my teeth when I got an unexpected text from Rebecca. It read:

            Please come to my office when you get in today.

Hm. That was an unusual text to get from your boss at 7:30 in the morning. I racked my brain trying to think of something I’d done to get a talking to. Yeah, it hadn’t been a great month for us, but it wasn’t anything I’d particularly done.

I finished up with my skin care and decided to head into work early to get whatever this was over with. I arrived at the club not much later, waving at the caretaker as I walked in. The walk up the stairs to Rebecca’s office felt excruciating.

But when I arrived there, it wasn’t just her. I opened the door and there was Higgins, Keeley, and Ted sitting in front of her desk.

            “Good morning, guys,” I entered approaching the group. “I didn’t know it was a party.”

            “(Y/N)!” They all greeted in unison.

            “Ah, that wasn’t creepy at all!” I laughed, trying not to show my nerves.

Rebecca motioned to a third seat. “Please, take a seat.”

I took off my backpack as I sat, holding it in front of me. “I’m not getting fired, am I? Oh my god, you’re firing me?”

            “What? Oh heavens, no!” Rebecca dismissed, shaking her hands. “Why on earth would you think that.”

            “Well, its all of you here, and I just walked in and thought it, I don’t know!” I shook my head. “If you’re not firing me, what are you doing?”

They all exchanged looks excitement filling their eyes.

            “Oooo go on! Tell her!” Keeley insisted, clapping her hands.

            “Tell me what?”

            “The anticipation is killing me!” Higgins chimed in.

            “What anticipation?”

            “She doesn’t even know what’s about to hit her!” Ted added.

            “Please just tell me what’s going on before I kill someone!” I was practically shaking at his point.

            “Oh, alright,” Rebecca addressed me finally. “(Y/N), the league is honoring you with Coach of the Month!” 

The group all cheered as I took in the information.

            “We have a press conference this afternoon,” Keeley told me. “We’ll brief you on everything you’ll need to do but we are just so excited for you!”

            “Couldn’t be happier for you,” Ted smiled. “You’re part of what makes this team great!”

            “Of course, she is! I hired her!” Rebecca hummed proudly. “I always knew you’d be great.”

I frowned. This wasn’t right. None of this was right.  They kept talking at me about what was going to happen. An interview, a photoshoot, a magazine cover but all it sounded like I was underwater. I had to get out of this room.

I stood up, grabbing my bag and leaving without so much as a word. I hurried down the stairs and outside into the car park. Why was I so upset? Why couldn’t part of me just be happy about this? I heard the door open behind me and I knew one of them had followed me.

            “Look, now I know emotions are a subjective thing, but I don’t know usually there’s at least a smile when you get a cool award.” Ah Ted. Just the person I didn’t want to see right now.

I shook my head. “Please, Ted. I don’t want to do this right now.”

            “Now, I’m confused. What exactly aren’t we doing?” Ted asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.

            “This!” I shouted, pointing between him and me. “You giving me some anecdote about how I’m good enough and how I earned this because you and I both know that isn’t true.”

Ted furrowed his eyebrows. “What are you talking about?”

            “I know why Rebecca hired you.” The statement hung in the air. The truth behind the whole operation at Richmond. The secret I’d overheard in the coach’s office at the end of Ted’s first season with us. “And it’s the same reason she hired me.” Ted paused, nodding his head. I couldn’t help but let out an ironic laugh at the situation. “We both know that I was hired because she thought it would make us lose.”

Rebecca, so overcome with her hatred of Rupert, hired Ted and Beard and I because she thought it would make the worst coaching team. We would drive the team into the ground ruining Rupert’s favorite team. This was something I tried to ignore but since finding out it seem to legitimize some of people shouted at me on the internet and what Max had said to me before I left. I wasn’t meant to be here. I wasn’t saving the league. I was just a girl pretending to know what I was doing.

            “Now, (Y/N), I don’t know what you think you heard but-“

            “Please cut the bullshit, Ted,” I snapped, cutting him off. “I’ve worked really hard to get past it, but I don’t deserve an award when I’ve done nothing to earn it.”

Ted’s mustache twitched. “You’re right. Rebecca hired both of us to make some point to Rupert. That is true. But something else that’s true is that you’ve consistently proved her wrong at every turn.” I opened my mouth to say something, but Ted held up his hand. “Now, you might not see it, but Beard and I and even Roy, we all depend on you to keep this whole thing afloat.”

I let out a breath and wipe at my lips as I stare at him. I certainly hadn’t been feeling like that recently. Since the West Ham match, we’d been on a losing streak, and I’d been so in my head about all of it that I couldn’t do my job.  

            “I just…” I swallowed hard. “I don’t know what I’m doing here anymore Ted. And this Coach of the Month is just another bullshit excuse for me to know that I’m not meant to be here.”

All I could hear in my head was the sound of my failed dreams and Max’s taunts and the paper missing the bin over and over and over again.

            “Hey (Y/N),” Ted’s voice appeared much closer than I thought he would be. “Do you remember that puzzle metaphor I told you about?” I scrunched my face up, nodding my head. “Well, that metaphor has a lot of different meanings. Maybe you should try to put it together again.”

I let out a frustrated sigh. “Can’t you just tell me what you mean for once, Ted?”

            “I mean,” He chuckled at my frustration. “You’re stuck in a rut, yeah? So, instead of trying to put the puzzle back together the same way over and over again… maybe you were putting it together the wrong way. Maybe you need to… try something new. And maybe…” He nudged me, forcing me to look over at him. “Maybe you should let someone help you put that puzzle together.”

I still didn’t get it. Well not fully. But I think I understood the gist of it. The funny thing was as we were staring at each other, Roy and Jamie came running up. Jamie smiled at Ted and I coming to run in circles around us.

            “Mornin’ Coaches,” He smiled, starting to run in place.

            “Tartt! You’re not done yet! Get to the training room and start lifting.” Roy followed up; a bit slower.

Jamie groaned loudly. “I ain’t even stopped or nuthin’. I were just sayin’ hi.”

            “Go!” Roy barked, pointing towards the door.

Jamie rolled his eyes dramatically before shooting Ted and I a wink. Roy shook his head as Jamie made his way inside, seemingly off to the training room.

            “Mornin’ Roy, good training with Jamie?” Ted asked Roy.

            “As good as it can be,” Roy grunted. “What are you two doin’ out here?”

Ted looked over at me, motioning for me to tell him. I shook my head at him, grunting that I wouldn’t. Ted hummed back that I absolutely would and that we wouldn’t leave until I said it. I let out a huff.

            “The leagues giving me some bullshit title of Coach of the Month that doesn’t actually mean anything but they’re making a big deal out of it,” I informed Roy finally.

He grunted is a way that sounded vaguely positive. “Good for you.”

            “Fuck off.”

            “Alright.”

The day was filled with Keeley throwing me through the PR wringer. What to expect, what to say, what not to say. I wasn’t super excited about it, but Ted’s words were rolling around in my head. I hated puzzles. I’d never liked them. I thought I’d figured out Jamie’s puzzle but now there was another puzzle. When would it end.

            “Okay, the most important bit is the press brief we have this afternoon. They’ll bring in you and some of the lads to talk about you as a coach,” Keeley told me, writing down some notes.

            “What will they be asking?” I questioned, trying to look over her shoulder.

            “Oi don’t be looking over my shoulder,” she reprimanded, shouldering me away. I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest. “They’ll ask you probably your normal annoying questions about being a woman, but also about the team and such.”

I grumbled. “I didn’t hear them asking Pep what it was like being bald why do I have to talk about being a woman.”

            “That’s because no one cares what it’s like being bald,” Keeley pointed out, giggling. “Being a woman is actually interesting.”

            “Is it really?” I rolled my eyes. “So, uh… what guys will be coming to talk about me?”

Keeley hummed as she flipped her notebook shut. “I dunno, I was gonna ask to see who wanted to later. Do you have anyone in mind?”

Yeah. Yeah, I did. “No, I don’t want to force anyone to do it.”

            “Sure. And Ted is gonna introduce you, of course.”

            “And this is all happening tomorrow?” I pushed out of my chair. I’d already waisted the whole day, I at least wanted to get to the end of training.

            “Yup!” Keeley smiled at me. “Don’t stress, you’re gonna be great.”

I shot her a sarcastic smile. “Oh yeah, I’m gonna love it. It’s gonna be amazing.”

…

Later that night, I was resting in Jamie’s lap. I felt goosebumps spreading over my body as Jamie’s hand stroked my stomach lazily. On the TV, an episode of New Girl that I’d seen hundreds of times played but I wasn’t really paying attention.

            “Jamie…” He hummed, letting me know he was listening. “Did they tell you about this… Coach of the Month thing?”

His face broke out into a smile as he looked down at me. “Yeah, it’s great, innit? So, fucking proud of you.” He tightened his grip around my waist, shaking me proudly.

I found myself blushing at his praise. Even though I thought it was kind of stupid, Jamie being proud of me was affecting my happiness a little too much.

            “Yeah… I guess… I don’t know what I think about it,” I admitted, rolling so I was looking up at him. He cocked his head, motioning me to continue. “I guess, I just don’t know if it’s because I’m a good coach or if it’s because I’m a woman or whatever.”

Jamie scrunched up his face pursing his lips in confusion. “What… why would they do that?

            “I don’t know to make themselves look better?” I sighed, lifting myself off his lap and leaning forward. I ran a hand through my hair. “I just… I’m not sure I’m ready to go out in front of all those people and talk about myself.”

Jamie leaned forward so his shoulder was touching mine, stretching his neck so he could try and rest it on my shoulder.

            “What are you doing?” I asked, looking over at him.

            “’m trying to comfort you, you daft idiot,” he explained, rubbing his cheek on your shoulder.

            “You’re acting like a cat,” I crowed, trying to push him off of me. But he wrapped his arm around mine arm pulling me into him, rubbing his cheek all over my shoulder and neck. “Stop!”

He grabbed my legs and pulled them up into his lap, pulling me so I was sitting on him.

            “Look, whatever happens tomorrow, just know that me,” he pressed his cheek into mine. “And the rest of the lads know how amazing you are. Not just as a coach but as a person. But especially as a coach.”

I giggled, pressing back into him. “What about you Jamie? How are you feeling about playing Man City this week?’

He shrugged. “My stats level up against Man City. They’ve played well this year but we’ve got the ability to win.”

            “No, Jamie… I mean,” I turned around, so I was facing him, my legs now straddling his waist. “How do you feel, like you.”

He frowned, his nose scrunching up in a way that was far too cute for one man. “I feel… uh… I feel fine.”

I reached up and rubbed the space between his eyes. “I don’t think you do babes, you’re gonna give yourself wrinkles.”

He rolled his eyes, leaning his neck back. His neck was so exposed, it was so tempting to just… lean forward and kiss his Adam’s apple. I looked up and decided to play a little bit. I leaned forward and kissed him, right on the bottom of his neck where the skin sunk in a little bit. He hummed, the vibrations tickling my mouth.

            “Jamie, baby,” I murmured, kissing up his neck, finally finding his Adam’s apple. He groaned in response. “C’mon, I want you to talk to me.”

            “Can’t talk when you’re kissing me like that,” he croaked, his voice deep and gravely. So, I stopped, pulling away from him completely. “Hey! Wait!”

I started to slide off of him, but he wrapped his hands around my waist and yanked me closer to him. He buried his head in my neck kissing me furiously. I shrieked grabbing onto his hair to tug him back.

            “Jamie, if you talk to me I’ll give you the best blow job of your life,” you waggled your eyebrows at him.

He whined, cracking his neck back and forth before slouching back. “I feel… fine. I guess. Haven’t heard from me dad in a while. It’s not like… I’m afraid he’s gonna be there but not knowing is worse.” I nodded at him, rubbing his collarbones. “But fuckin’ Zava’s probably gonna take the attention anyways.”

I gave him a sympathetic smile. “Well, it’s okay to be worried about your dad but… we’re at home. We’re on your turf. He doesn’t even need to be allowed in if you don’t want.”

            “I’m not gonna ban me dad,” Jamie grumbled. “I just… want to know.”

I nodded again. I gave him a satisfied smile before pulling him down into me to make good on my promise.

He wanted to stay over that night, but I insisted that I wanted to maintain my regular routine for the next day. But laying in my bed that night, staring up at the fan, I wished he was there with me.

I arrived at the club early. Like 6:30am early. The groundskeeper had barely arrived by the time I got there. But I was nervous. I’d been able to avoid press conferences, manage photo events and stay in my lane for the most part but today it was all on me. And why was I wasting a day doing this when we had out Man City game this weekend, I’ll never know.

            “Oh, my god, how long have you been here?” Keeley asked, handing me a coffee as she walked into the press room.

            “Since 6:30, I couldn’t sleep,” I told her accepting the drink gratefully.

Keeley clicked her tongue at me soothingly. “It’s gonna be alright, you’ve got this. I just want you to be yourself up there, yeah? We’re starting with the photo shoot first today, the press conference will be this afternoon, when the boys are free.”

And that came faster than I expected. After a long day of cameras and poking and prodding I was left staring at the door of the press room. I could practically hear it, the flashing of the cameras, I could feel it, the stares of the journalists waiting for me to slip up, waiting for their next scoop. Ted was in there right now, talking me up. I picked at my thumbs, trying to steady my breath but I was struggling to find it. I felt like my head was buzzing, and that my heart was moving at a thousand beats per second. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to drown out the now blinding florescent lights.

Suddenly arms were wrapping around me, holding me so tight. “Hey, it’s okay, I got you.”

Jamie. I immediately latched onto him. I didn’t care if we were in public, I didn’t care if someone from the press room got a peak at this, all I cared about was Jamie’s steady heartbeat helping me regain my control.

            “There you go,” He murmured, lips brushing against my temple. “Just breath, love.” I did as he instructed, finally finding the control of my breathing. I let myself blink my eyes open and look up at Jamie. He smiled at me, brushing some of the hair out of my face. “There she is.”

            “Hi, Jamie,” I squeaked at him, resting my chin on his chest.

            “You know it’s kinda nice seeing you be the needy one for once,” he said to you.

I gaped at him, scoffing. “Don’t say that, I’m having a panic attack and you’re gloating?”

            “I gotta take it where I can find it,” He chuckled. Then he leaned down and kissed my temple, his lips lingering there. “You’re gonna be amazing in there.”

            “What if I’m not… what they want?” I croaked. “What if I mess up or do something stupid.”

            “It would be right funny if you did that!” You gasped and hit his chest. “Hey! That hurt. I’m just sayin that you could become a meme.”

            “Jamie!”

            “Alright, alright, jus’ there’s no way they won’t want you cause… I mean you’re everything there is to want,” Jamie noted, as if it was easy, as if it was simple.

I felt that breathless feeling again but this time it wasn’t because of panic, it was because of Jamie. I smiled with my lips tucked, looking between his eyes before reaching up and kissing him. He kissed me tenderly, softly. In a way that made me hum in contentment. I probably would have stayed like that if it weren’t for the next intrusion.

            “Oi!” Roy’s voice made us jump apart. “If the two of you want to keep this a secret, then you better stop kissing in the fucking hallway.” He growled as he marched towards us. “Tartt, go get changed you’re gotta be in there in 5 minutes.”

I looked over at Jamie surprised. “You’re coming to talk about me?”

            “Obviously?” He stated, rolling his eyes. “Even if we weren’t dating, you’d still be my best friend.” I just about melted at that one.

            “Uuuuuugggggghhhhhhhhh,” Roy groaned loudly, grabbing Jamie by the arm and starting to drag him down the hallway. “Good luck, (Y/N).”

I laughed, covering my face as I watched them go. Then the door to the press room opened and Keeley poke her head out.

            “You ready, babes?”

I watched Jamie disappear into the locker room and I felt that tell-tale flutter in my chest. I felt okay. I was going to be okay.

            “Yeah, let’s do it.”

She pulled me into the room as Ted was finishing up his speech.

            “(Y/N) (L/N) has overcome incredible odds. And she has done it with a smile. So, without further ado, it is my honor to present you with (Y/N) (L/N)!”

I walked up on the stage to scattered applause. I waved hesitantly sitting down in front of the microphone. As I did, they all flooded the stage putting up their own recording devices. My eyes darted around the room at the different reporters until they landed on the back of the room where Rebecca, Higgins, Trent, and Keeley stood. I nodded at them, glad to have some friendly faces in the room.  

            “Uh… hi! I’m (Y/N) (L/N)…” I started, looking around to focus on someone. How did Ted do this? “I’m happy to be chosen as the Premier League’s Coach of the Month. Uh… does anyone have any questions?’ Immediately the room exploded as all their hands raised up. “Um okay you, in the front row.”

            “Hi Ms. (Y/N)-“

            “It’s Coach (L/N).”

            “As a woman, what do you think the league can do to work on intersectionality across the teams?”

I furrowed my eyes brows. “That question doesn’t even make sense.”  

Again, the hands raised, everyone calling out my name. I pointed to someone in the back.

            “Coach, do you think being a woman has enhanced your ability to coach men or made it more difficult to understand the difficulties of being men in sports?”

            “That’s like two questions shoved into one and the answer is no.”

            “Coach (L/N), when you applied for the job here at Richmond did you do it to prove a point?”

            “What? That’s not-“

            “Where do you think the feature of the league is in terms of gender equality?”

This was going about as well as I thought it was going to be. I let out a frustrated sigh as they continued to shout questions at me. In the back of the room a door opened and in walked Colin, Sam, and Jamie. Colin waved at me, crossing his arms at his space in the back. I looked across the back of the room, at Ted and Keeley, Colin and Sam, and Jamie. The people in my life that made this possible. That made me possible.

            “Okay, okay, everyone listen up,” I announced, hitting my hand on the table. The room went quiet. I shot Keeley an apologetic glance before taking a deep breath. “Listen, I didn’t take this job because I wanted to make some big statement about feminism or gender inequality or intersectionality. I took the job because I wanted to play football for money, just like any of the lads on the team.”

“And if you really cared about gender equality, you’d be talking to the many female coaches that coach the women’s league. Or the many female players? Why don’t we talk about the wage inequality when the women win more games? That’s what you should be asking me about!”

I leaned back in my chair and looked around the room. The reporters were all silent until one, Marcus Adebayo, raised his hand.

            “Yeah, Marcus,” I called on him.

            “Coach (L/N), how do you feel about Richmond’s chances against Man City on this weekend?” He asked, pen at the ready.

I paused for a second, let out a huff. “Thank you, you know Man City has kept us down for a long time, but I think our chances look good.”

…

Our chances were not good. The game was bad play after bad play, the boys were just not at their best. You wanted to blame it on Zava, the bastard decided to retire without telling anyone and didn’t even show up to the game. It was depressing and everyone felt it.

            “Yeah… it was tough out there today,” I said to the reporter after the game.

            “You are Premiere League’s Coach of the Month; do you feel like there was something more you could have done to secure this win?” The reporter asked bluntly.

            “That’s somewhat of a redundant question. I’m an assistant coach. I do the best I can, but the boys are the ones who need to win, and they just didn’t have it today.” I replied, shrugging. “That’s all I have time for, sorry.”

I left the reporters with a small smile and started towards the locker room running a hand through my hair. This had been tough, and Keeley hadn’t been able to show up. Something about Shandy and a baby lamb and a lot of poop. I’m sure I’d hear about it more later.  But for now, I walked into the depressing atmosphere that was the locker room.

I looked around the room, the boys sat silently in their despair. Jamie sat on the floor in front of his cubby like he did when he was upset. I glanced over at Bead and Roy who gave me a pair of sad smiles back. I looked over at Zava’s empty cubbies and frowned. I hated Zava. To come here and bring these boys hope then abandon them without a word I’d never be able to forgive him for that.

            “Gentlemen, Hey,” Ted Emerged from the office. “That was a tought on tonight. Okay? Man City has still got our number. That… that’s all right.” The boys murmured a sad response. “We’re gonna get another crack at them later in the season. Uh-huh. Coach,” He addressed Beard. “No practice tomorrow yeah?”

            “That’s right”

            “Okay, well, I’ll see y’all on Monday,” Ted finished starting to turn around.

            “Hey, hey. Hey Coach!” Sam spoke up. “What about Zava? He quit the team.”

I looked back over at Ted, wondering the same question myself. Ted sputtered a moment before answering. “Technically he retired from the whole sport, which does make it feel a little less personal, yeah? You know, like if, uh, your girlfriend runs off with some dude and it turns out they were soul mates.”

Again the boys grumbled a response, something about Gina Gershon was in the mix but it was mostly positive. I thought Ted might end it there, but he didn’t.

            “Look. I hear you, okay? Zava is gone. And You what? I think it’s a good thing.” I perked up, interested to see where he was going with this. “Well, I do! Okay, look. Do I wanna win? Heck yeah? But I also wanna do it with folks that wanna be here.” I nodded, agreeing with his sentiment. “It’s not like we could handcuff him to his locker and make him love us.”

            “We could have tried,” Dani cried from his spot. I could help but let out a chuckle, knowing that he really meant it.

            “Hey, guys, look,” Ted regained their attention. “We got a good thing going here. Alright? We didn’t need Zava. Yeah?” Ted looked over at Jamie who nodded. I felt my heart warm knowing Ted was using Jamie’s words to encourage the team. “All we need to win are the fellas in this room right now. And all you fellas need to do is believe it.”

Just as he spoke the believe sign behind him fell, the torn pieces revealing themselves. The boys all starting clamoring shouting in fear.

            “It’s a sign!” Bumbercatch shouted.

            “That’s it. We’re doomed,” Colin agreed.

In the moment it was hard to disagree with them. Things hadn’t been great recently. And this just felt like the final nail in the coffin.

            “Hey, knock it off, okay? We’re not doomed. No one is doomed,” Ted putting his hands up to calm everyone. “But, Bumbercatch, yes, you’re right. It is a sign. I agree.” He took down the two pieces and ripped them in half. I felt myself reaching out to stop him, not even knowing I was doing it, but surprisingly, Jamie’s hand on my leg stopped me. I looked down at him and he nodded towards Ted. “Belief doesn’t just happen cause you hang something up on a wall. Alright? It comes from in here.” He pointed at his chest. “And up here,” at his head, “ and down here.” At his stomach.

“Only problem is, we all got so much junk floating through us, a lot of time we end up getting in our own way. You crap like envy, or fear, or shame.” I swallowed hard, biting my lip. I knew he was right, I’d been letting my fear and shame of who I was get in the way of my happiness. Of my abilities as a coach. “I don’t wanna mess around with that shit anymore. Do you?”

We all shook our heads, some of the lads responding with a ‘no’, or a ‘no, coach’

“No, me neither. Hell no.  Well, you know what I wanna mess around with? The belief that I matter, you know? Regardless of what I do or don’t achieve. Or the belief that we all deserbe to be loved. Whether we’ve been hurt or maybe we’ve hurt somebody else.”

“Or what about the belief of hope? Yeah? That’s what I wanna mess with. Believing that things can get better. That I can get better. That we will get better. Oh, man. To believe in yourself. To believe in one another. Man, that’s… that’s fundamental to being alive. And look. If you can do that, if each of you can truly do that…” He ripped the sign in half again. “Can’t nobody rip that apart.”

With that he walked over to the middle divider and slapped the ripped-up sign down on top of it.

“See y’all, Monday?”

The whole team responded with a ‘Yes, Coach’ before turning back to their cubbies to get ready to leave. But I stayed there. Staring at the broken sign. I wanted to believe. I needed to believe. And this team, these people, they helped me believe. Come what may, this whole room had my back.

…

I was still thinking about it as I arrived home that night. I didn’t expect Jamie to come over, it’d been a long day and he was waking up early still to do extra training. So, when he knocked on my door, I was surprised.

            “Jamie? What are you doing here.” I asked him, pulling him inside.

            “I wanna tell people about us,” He answered quickly. My eyes widened. “I know why you’ve been wanting to keep it a secret and I get that; I do. But… what Ted said today I just… I believe in us. I believe in you making me a better person and I don’t… I don’t want to hide that anymore.”

I stared at him, unsure of how to respond. I didn’t know if I was ready yet for the whole world to know. For ours to become theirs. I loved Jamie, I really did but what if it changed too much. Or worse, what if people tore us apart. Luckily Jamie continued speaking before I could answer.

            “You don’t have to decide right now. I just wanted to put it out there.” He nodded at me before leaning down and kissing my cheek. “Alright, I’m gonna go now.”

And he was out the door.

Fuck.

Tag List: Taglist:@heletsmelovehim @higherthanheroes @ajax-petropolus-wife @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo @optimisticsandwichgladiator @kno-way-home @sleepy-time @wigglegiggle @skewedcherries @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @snubug @rana030 @ems-alexandra @jaymum @sokkigarden

[scaradooche]

Lovesick

Buzzing, buzzing is what you wake up to. More specifically buzzing from your phone. You pick up your phone all drowsy to see someone calling you. “Hm?” you say waiting for the other person on the line to speak.

“Y/n where the fuck are you right now? Lumine says hastily.

“At my house.” You mumble

“Y/n it’s 7:58 am school starts at 8.”

You immediately hang up without saying another word. You rush out of bed dreading the outcome of the day already.

It’s 8:20 am when you get to school. You walk slow trying to delay your arrival to your first class which is Ap physics with one of the worst teachers. Ms. Cordez. Great. You take the time to actually look at the outfit you’re wearing. You’re wearing black sweats with a gray sweater and a white shirt. The outfit you picked out wasn’t that bad for picking random stuff you saw in your room but it wasn’t exactly something you would normally wear. You stopped, you didn’t know why. It was like your mind wasn’t processing anything your body was doing. You pick up your head from looking at the ground to realize that you’re in front of your class. You take a deep breath and enter the classroom.

You’re not even one step in before you here a “Ah, look who decided to show up.”

“Hello..” you mutter trying to make your way to your seat.

“Not so fast young lady, why are you late?” You hear Ms. Cordick Cordez say.

“Overslept..”

“Give me a full sentence.”

“I overslept.” you state clearly getting annoyed of her. Sometimes you wonder to yourself if she actually has a life outside of school. You could never imagine that. There is reason why she’s a Ms. and not a Mrs.

“Do you think that is a full sentence?” she says in a irritated voice. When looking at her face you notice that she looks as red as a lobster. You find the comparison quite funny. If you really think about it she does have facial features that do resemble one.

“Yes.”

“Oh, so you want to give me attitude now?” She says in the most obnoxious way ever. At this point you just think she’s trying to get under your skin.

“What the hell? I’m not-“ you try to speak before Ms. Cordez interrupts you.

“We do not use this kind of language in this classroom.” She speaks with a pissy tone.

‘You’re being dramatic, you need to actually chill it’s not a big deal.”

“You do not tell me to chill. I am not your friend. I am your teacher. You need to learn some manners young lady. Detention after school.”

You give her a blank stare before walking to your seat. What a pleasant start to your day you think.

3:00 pm, school finally ended and you can see people heading out of there classes. Some heading out with their friends most likely having plans since it’s a Friday others just going home. You pull out your phone to text your friends.

You close your phone heading to Ms. Cordicks classroom to spend two hours of your life doing absolutely nothing. When you get there the first thing she has you do is check in and hand her your phone.

“You’ll get this back after you serve your time.”

You nod your head and find a table to sit at. Once you find a desk you bring out a notebook planning to just doodle instead of doing any actual work. Around 5 minutes later you see more students coming in you hope that none of them sit next to you. You never really liked the fact that she had table with chairs instead of just desks. Another 5 minutes later Ms. Cordez decides to speak.

“Seeing that everyone is here, I would like to say that I’m not going to be in the same room with you while you serve your time here. Instead I’ll be in another room with Mrs. Smith grading work together. I assume you won’t leave this room without your phones. I except you all to be doing work for the next two hours.” She’s says hastily before she walks out.

Once she leaves you see friends that were split up start getting up and sitting together. The news that she’s not going to be in this room doesn’t affect you at all. While you’re doodling you hear someone getting up. It doesn’t bother you since a lot of people are getting up right now and changing their seats. It doesn’t bother you until this person sits next to you. You stop doodling and look up at this person to only realize it was him. The kids older brother. Your “boyfriend”. Childe.

Prev||Masterlist||Next 2.5: Fuck you Ms. Cordick

Fun Facts:

Idk how to write accurate detention scenes since I’ve never gotten detention 😝😝😍😍

Idk how to write so don’t mind my bad writing

Ms. Cordez is my irl teacher I hate her sm praying on her downfall everyday 😍

Next chapter will probably be uploaded today and it’s gonna be majority writing 😝 be prepared for more of my bad writing 😍😍🔥🔥

No character fun facts this chapter 😔😞😣 the first half wants to be bold for some reason pls don’t mind it 😓😓

[thecapricunt1616]

The Bear & His Honey - Chapter 14

♡ Chapter Inspo: The Archer - Lover (TS) ; And I cut off my nose, just to spite my face. Then I hate my reflection, for years and years.

♡ Summary: Winnie has a bit of a meltdown after therapy, this time Carmy is the one to help her calm down.

♡ W/C: 5,444

♡ Posted Date: 03/24/24

♡ A/N: Heyyy all! I am so happy you're enjoying this story! Thank you so much for the love and likes and reblogs!!! This is a 2 part chapter, C14&C15 are kinda twins, it was gonna be one chapter but I think you guys like the shorter ones so each is gonna be 5/6k instead of one thick 12k chapter! I should be posting C15 soon, still polishing it up :) Enjoy!

♡ Warnings for BTC: Anxiety, Panic attacks, Angst, Hurt to comfort kinda thing, Mentions of Domestic Abuse (physical, verbal,etc)

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡

➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡

𝒞𝒶𝓇𝓂'𝓈 𝒫.𝒪.𝒱.🧸

I woke up, warm and comfortable. There was a weight between my legs, my right thigh actually felt numb under it. I yawned big, stretching comfortably, my knuckles brushing the plush of Winnie’s headboard. 

So I did come back here this morning.  

I reach out to my left, in search of Winnie, feeling a light crinkle under my grasp. I opened my eyes, pinching the flimsy paper between my fingers and unfolding it to read.  

‘Went to therapy. Be back by 4:30, please lock the door if you leave…(didn’t wanna wake you, you’re so sweet + handsome when you’re sleeping ♡ ) xoxo - Honey :)’ 

I smiled lightly, my gaze drifting down. I nudged the cat lightly whom had made a comfy bed on my thigh causing it to fall asleep. “Good afternoon- lazybones” I muttered, sitting up lightly and she mews, stretching out comfortably over my legs, begging for attention.  

I snort a laugh. “Y’know? Y’re a lot like y’mother- needy for pets ‘n love” I teased, rubbing her fluffy chest gently. She purred wildly, sitting up and sniffing my fingers before standing up, stretching out, showing off her daggers and flicking her feather duster of a tail and sassily making a show of walking up onto my hip, since I was sat on my side, carefully balancing herself on my ribs. 

She made her way up silently, and started licking the inside of my ear. “Aughh!! Bad! Shoo! Bad fuckin’ kitty! No fuckin’ way, cat!!! ew! Absolutely not nasty!” I swat next to my ear and felt her claws digging in to my side to balance herself, groaning- I shove her off my ribs and she makes a sharp “mrooww!!!” in protest. “Well, fuck off, cat!” I nudge her off the bed. If there was one thing I would not tolerate, Is something licking the inside of my fucking ear. 

I huffed, grabbing my phone and seeing the time was- 4:00?! I raised my eyebrows in surprise,

Great. Now my sleeping schedules all fucked up. Just wonderful. 

I clicked on a notification from Sugar, huffing a laugh at the drastic changes in tone from one text to another

Hey. Meant what I said, she’s good for youuu!!! Kiss and make up!

Check this lady out she’s right 20s are the worst ever bear it’s normal to feel how u do with all the bs 

Don’t have kids. Just had to go down to the school to bring bug home, she threw up. Twice. 

I chuckle, sending her a reply 

Wasn’t planning on it. Twice?? Don’t bring whatever shit she got to the restaurant. Hope she’s ok 

I got up, clicking the link wondering what she was on about, listening to the podcast of some woman go on about how ‘being in your 20’s was the worst period in your life’ I snort, nodding a bit to myself at the sentiment. 

As far as I’d seen, the last 7 years of my life had been the absolute worst- a shit show, a fuckin’ dumpster fire. So, the lady was onto something as far as that went. 

‘Now- I get it, listen- everyone in your life, has been telling you ‘relax, the world is at your fingertips! You just wanna take those fingertips, curl them into a fist- and punch them into a fuckin face!! Cause how- don’t people realize how scary that is?!’ 

I chuckled, starting the shower and grabbing a towel from the linen closet, leaving it on the counter for when I got out. Wasn’t that the truth. I am sick and tired of people telling me ‘just relax Carmen! You’re only 27, look how much you’ve already accomplished?! You’re gonna be fine, everything will be fine, you’re doing fine!’ 

But I didn’t feel fine. Not in the slightest. I felt fuckin’ lost. Ahead of the curve, but severely behind. Worlds ahead of people my age- but yet, completely socially inept. It was fuckin’ exhausting. 

She continued as I slipped off my sweatpants and boxers, pulling back the sparkly white shower curtain stepping under the water. ‘And let me tell you- people who say ‘oh, your 20s are the best time in your life, blah blah fuckin’ blah, no! That is complete, and utter bullshit! It might actually be the hardest decade in your life. There! I said it. So if you just let out a sigh of relief- i just want to say good. Good! It is normal and I just want to read this, this is a submission from a 28 year old listener her name is Candace” 

She went on about how some girl, had graduated from college- and realized that after she graduated, much like after I’d left culinary school, everything just went to utter shit. She lost all her friends, hated her new job, realized she may not like being in the field she was in, realized she had no romantic prospects after breaking up with her long term boyfriend - was constantly fighting with family, essentially everything she’d thought could never go wrong, went wrong, and she’d felt utterly lost. Something I could very much relate to. 

She continued on, ‘Now- Candace let me just say. Yes! And all the people listening and nodding along? I want you to understand, this is the average experience for someone in their 20’s. And let me just pause and say this this is why this decade is so fucking hard’ she goes on as I grabbed Winnie’s shampoo and started washing my hair, listening intently. 

‘Listen, it is the first time in your life- your whole life! That someone isn’t telling you what to do. Just stop and think, there is no playbook! Nothing! All you’ve known, from 0-20- is someone else’s playbook. Whether it be mom, dad, sibling, grandparents- doesn’t matter! For the first 20 years, every single detail had been planned for you. And it was planned for all your peers and friends too. That’s a huge piece- remember, from 0-20 you were all running at the same pace! You had vacations at the same time for Christ sake! ‘ she explained and I hum a bit in agreement to myself. 

I’d never really thought about it that way, it was true. I’d spent my entire life comparing myself. And now it has just gotten even worse since I’d left culinary school. It was my one crutch- but now? I felt like a fuckin loser.

 Everyone my age was married, or having kids, or graduating college. I had multiple offers to go to Technical College after I’d graduated culinary school, but I hadn’t because I was obsessed with chasing awards.It didn’t matter to me that I graduated top of my class-  I had to prove to my mom, to Mikey- that I was serious, that I had really been made in the industry. And the way to do that, was being awarded- not getting a stupid degree.  

 I grabbed the pink wash cloth I’d taken in with me, looking over one of her many different shelves of various soaps and being slightly overwhelmed at all the options, I just settled on the one at my eye level. Most of them were full, which told me she either didn’t like them, or it was too much of a hassle for her to try and reach them so high up.  My choices in scent were Butterfly, whatever the fuck that smells like, Beautiful Day, sounds flowery- so not f’me. And simply relax. I picked up the bottle, Reading the back ‘smells like a dreamy bedside bouquet of lavender and vanilla’ well, I guess that’s what I was gonna smell like today.

By the time I’d gotten out of the shower I heard the front door close and Persephone loudly meowing. “Is that my wittle baby girl? Is Carmy still here? Mmm? Keepin’ y’company miss baby?” Winnie coos. I smiled a bit to myself, slipping on a clean pair of boxers I’d grabbed from my backpack. 

I paused what I’d been listening to, opening the bathroom door. The steam floods into the bedroom - fuck. I didn’t realize the water had been so hot. I grabbed the towel, messily rubbing it over my hair to get rid of the annoying dripping down my back. 

 “Babe?” I called out to let her know I was still here. 

The bedroom door nudged open quickly and Persephone rushed in, circling my legs and mewing loudly. 

“Oh! You didn’t leave? Hey!” The bedroom door nudges open further, and when my eyes met hers my heart cracked slightly. Her hazel eyes were bloodshot, glazed over like she’d been crying. Her nose has been rubbed raw assumingly by tissues. 

“Are- is everything…are y’alright baby?” I asked gently. She nodded quickly, a small, sad smile curling on her lips. 

“Sorry- I must look like shit…” she started and I shook my head, stepping forward to her and pulling her into a hug. She melted into me, resting her head on my chest and took a shuddering breath.

“Never angel, how was your appointment?” I ask quietly, rubbing soothing strokes over her back. 

“Good- I guess..I mean…I guess it’s good when it hurts? I dunno. But yeah we talked um…about you? Well..about me. And about everything.” She sniffled. 

I rest my chin on her head, biting my cheek nervously since my lip was so sore after I’d bitten the hell out of it last night. “Yea? D’you wanna…talk about it? Er?…we don’t have to- but I’m here baby if y’want to” I questioned nervously, gently rubbing my fingers up the seams of her overalls. 

“Yea-if..if you’re ok with it-well I just..” her voice cracked and she clears her throat. “I’m sorry if I- I-if I cry everything is just really raw and It’s not to make you feel bad” she said and I kissed the top of her head gently. 

“You never have to apologize for crying baby. I know you aren’t trying to make me feel bad, I mean…I kinda wish I could let stuff out sometimes- but I can’t unless…” I trailed off sighing a bit, rubbing up her back and pulling her more into me. 

 ”I-I’m- I’m just so..so sorry, Carmy..” she whispered and I brushed her hair back from her shoulder, gently smoothing it out over her back. 

“F’what? F’what..baby?” I gently play with the ends of her hair, weaving the silky strands between my fingers. 

“I-if I ever made you feel like…difficult? y’re not hard to be with..I’m- I’m so fucking sorry…I’m so sorry f’r being so selfish Carmy, I want you I-“ she huffed a silent, shaking sob into my shoulder.

“Baby what? No…no angel it’s ok” I wrap my arms around her, rocking her gently. “No. No you aren’t selfish baby.” I said “i know you want me, i know. Y’didnt do that…I did that, I make myself feel like that” I whisper into her hair, I usually wouldn’t be so honest with my feelings, but my heart was aching. I had to say anything I could to get her to stop feeling so sad.  

I kissed the top of her head gently, she was suddenly feeling much too warm. “C’mon- let’s get outta this, y’re burning up, baby. Wha’s wrong, mm? Y’re not selfish, Win, why do you feel that way?” I led her to the bed, gently urging her to sit.

She looked up at me, her large green eyes tear-filled and red. “I-I-y’re perfect, Carmen. I-I can’t…I couldn’t…I wouldn’t want to d’anything…like to change you-you” she sniffled and I cupped her cheeks, sitting next to her. “I-I-I don’t” she shakes her head “don’t change f’me, because of me” she hugs me tightly. 

I felt tears welling up behind my eyes. All Claire wanted was for me to change. I took a deep, shaky breath at the realization, holding her tighter. “Thank you” I whispered when I managed to swallow the lump forming in my throat. 

She took a shuddering breath and pulled away, quickly unclipping the buttons on her overalls, “too hot” she mumbled, pushing them down to her hips and shimmying them off quickly before clawing off her long-sleeved shirt, throwing it to the floor.

Fuck..She's having a panic attack.

I quickly got up and grabbed her black NASCAR t-shirt she’d thrown in the hamper that she’d worn to bed so many times before, “Here, ye’? This is comfortable right baby?” I asked and she shook her head fervently, walking to the bathroom quickly and shoving open the door without mind, the wood slamming into the wall.

“Baby- let me” she cuts me off

“Where is it, where did you put your shirt?” she asked, rushing over to the hamper when she didn’t find it in the bathroom and mindlessly rifling through it.

“Wha- which one baby- y’re makin’ a mess…” I walked over, running my hand through my hair as she chucked shirts and underwear and jeans every which way.

“The white one carmy? Which other shirt do you wear?” she choked out.

“Oh! Oh- here, c’mere” i told her, walking over to my side of the bed and pulling back the covers, digging out my white t-shirt from the mess of sheets. “This? Right? Ye’ baby?” she nods and takes it from me, sliding it over her head and sinking into her side of the bed, grabbing her blanket and wrapping it over her head and neck, rubbing the silk tag against her lips as she tries to relax her rapid breathing. 

Seph comes up as if on queue, sitting in her lap and laying down, purring loudly as she kneads the blanket over Winnie’s legs. She strokes her tail and closes her eyes, leaning her head against the headboard.

“Sorry…i’m-i-i’m sorry” she breathes out after a few minutes of stroking her tail and trying to calm herself down. I carefully sat down next to her and tuck the blanket back a bit so I could better see her face.

“Why?” I asked gently, looking over at her. She continued stroking Persephones tail, sighing to herself. 

“F’r…For like- I’m sorry for bombarding you like this” she releases a shaky sigh, wiping her eyes and shaking her head. “It’s a lot every time” she said and I nod, taking her free hand and gently pressing it to my lips. 

“I get it, baby. Trust me. That’s like- nothin’ I get so worked up. Y’re really tame” I said and she smiled a bit, lacing our fingers together. 

“Oh no I had a full meltdown at the grocery store too on the way home, this is just the aftermath…they were out of cherry juice and I- I’ve been thinkin about it all week.” She shook her head, looking at her lap and covering her face with her blanket. “And I- I used the money on cranberry instead, and I tried it…and it’s not the same” she said her voice cracking again and she sniffled. 

“Oh sweet baby” I wrapped my arms around her, kissing her blanket covered head. “I’ll make you cherry juice, d’worry” I said soothingly, rubbing her side gently. 

“It’s stupid Carmy. No. Don’t it’s all stupid. Plus I made you upset. I don't deserve my juice anyway” she said sadly, slightly nudging my arms away. 

I pouted a bit at her words “hey, no- don’t say that, Win. You deserve all the cherry juice. That’s all you want, mm? Some cherry juice?” I held her tighter, pulling her into my chest. 

She rested her cheek against my skin for a moment, before nuzzling her cold, cry-slicked nose into my neck and inhaling deeply, causing me to laugh a bit.

 “Mmhmm. I do. But- You took a shower and used my soap, smells good.” She said and I squeezed her waist gently. 

“I did. Can you tell which of your 50 million soaps I chose?” I mused and she giggled a bit, my heart lightening immediately at the sound. 

“Mmm” she hums, taking another big sniff this time in the middle of my throat, but not without nibbling my collarbone gently before pulling away. “Floral. But herby. The lavender one?” She questions. 

“Wow- you have quite the nose. Even when it’s all boogery cause you’re sad about cherry juice” I teased and she looks up at me, pecking my lips. 

“Mmhmm. I have the best nose. So don’t go smooching any girls cause I know your scent mister.” She mused and I hum, a smirk dancing on my lips. 

“You do now? Go on then. What do I smell like?” I asked, curious as to what she’d say. 

“Well, cigarettes- duh. Hmm..like- musky I dunno like in a really good way though. And then a tiny bit of Y’re laundry detergent annddd” she nuzzled her nose right below my jaw and sniffed, humming in a satisfied way that made me chuckle.

“Mmm like…vanilla. But boy vanilla? Does that make sense?” She bites the sensitive skin gently and I bit back a moan. 

“Mmhmm didn’t ask about taste baby” my hand travels around to her stomach rubbing up gently. 

“What do I smell like? You’re the one with the advanced palate chef” she kissed the same spot she’d just assaulted to soothe the sting before running her tongue over it gently. 

“What part?” I let my eyes flutter shut and she giggled into my skin. 

“Ohhh naughty, dirty chef” she nudged Persephone away to which she meows in objection as Winnie took her spot straddling my lap. “Tell me both.” She said softly in my ear, playing with my hair gently. 

“Hmm…bready but in the best way. But it tastes kinda sweet. Like…” I huff a laugh through my nose at the comparison. “Have you ever had…Japanese tea bread?” I questioned and she giggled into my hair. 

“No. What is it?” I gently squeeze her ass with my palms as I explained. 

“It’s- well bread. But it’s kinda salty sweet, the first time I went down on you it’s what I thought of. It’s really good” I said looking up at her. She shakes her head and rests her forehead on mine. 

“Y’know. I think you’re the cutest ever” she said softly, kissing the bridge of my nose before resting her forehead on mine again. 

“Why, cause I think your pussy smells kinda like shokupan?” I snort a laugh and she giggled, her eyes scrunching adorably. 

“No. Well- yes in a way, I think it’s fuckin adorable that instead of being like- all turned on and thinking about what we were doing, you were sitting there being like ‘i know I’ve had this somewhere’ “ she said and I laughed a bit, my hands travelling up to rest on her hips. 

“No. In the moment I was like- I actually was trying not to bust in your face, like- as soon as you went down on me, because Y’re so hot. But- later. I think it was as we were falling asleep. I was thinkin’bout it. And it dawned on me” I said rubbing the backs of her thighs and gently squeezing. 

“My therapist says we’re good for eachother” she said suddenly and it felt like my heart leapt into my throat and I nearly choked on it. 

“Oh?” I ask and clear my throat. “Like- well…yea..right? D-did you think we were bad for eachother?” I questioned, my cheeks suddenly feeling hot. 

“No! No the opposite. I was hoping she was gonna agree we’re good f’r eachother and she…she did. She said that I just- I need to…like…be more open and stuff with how I feel so…yeah that’s why I allowed myself to tell you everything and..yeah..” she said softly, resting her head on my shoulder and wrapping her arms around my neck. 

I felt myself instantly relax at the admission. The affirmation doing wonders for my anxiety. 

“Thank you f’r tellin me, honey” I said softly, kissing her cheek. “I think we’re good together, too” I rubbed her back gently. “Cmon, let me go get the cherrys baby, y’want your juice” I told her. 

“Y’don’t have to make it for me, Carm. It’s..it’s probably gonna be alotta work and..it’s not worth it for stupid juice.” She muttered and I kiss her cheek. 

“Will it make you happy baby?” I asked, rubbing her side gently. 

“ ‘fcourse I love anything you make Carmy but I’m not gonna make you work on your day off” she said and I gently pull her chin up so she looks at me. 

“It’s not work when I’m cooking for you honey, it’s fun. I love cooking. It’s why it’s my job, even though it’s shit. It’s fun when I can do it in a more…peaceful environment I guess” I smiled a bit and she took my hand, kissing it. 

“I’m making you dinner then and you get a massage after” she said, gently kissing over each letter on my knuckles. 

“That sounds like a wonderful deal baby.” I watched her, my cheeks heating at the sweetness of the gesture. 

“Have you ever had- well. That’s a stupid question. You’ve probably tasted everything” she said, gently playing with my fingers. “I was gonna say have you ever had tomate farcies but now I feel..kinda silly cause- why wouldn’t you have had, it you went to culinary school in Paris” she smiled a bit. 

“You speak French?” I questioned and her brows furrowed a bit. 

“I didn’t- I didn’t tell you? Our grandma was from Quebec…yeah I grew up on French. You- you don’t? How did you live over there?” She questioned and I shrug a bit. 

“Uhh…didn’t. Really- I mean…I was either goin’ T’school or working. I went out like 2 times total. I know all the cooking terms those are all I needed…then I moved to Denmark and uh…yeah they speak a lot more English so it didn't make a difference” I shrugged. “I’ve always wanted to learn though, so you can teach me baby” I kissed the corner of her mouth gently. 

“Of course! Well..I’m not the best teacher, I only speak it with my gram on the phone when I call her now- but she raised us a lot of the time, we stayed with her over the summers cause my mom worked so much. I’ll show you what I know, We’ll start when you get back from the store” she pecks my lips before rolling off my lap and I got up, stretching my back that felt worlds better after a good 10 hours rest in her comfortable bed. 

“Sounds perfect. What kinda cherries do you like babe?” I asked grabbing my grey hoodie from end of the bed and slipping it on. 

“Kind of Cherries? I dunno…there’s different kinds?” She giggled and I shook my head with a grin. 

“Yes, there are, honey. How about I surprise you, yeah?” I wrap my arms around her waist, kissing her forehead. 

“Mmhmm” she said and kissed my nose. “Be safe please, there were alotta cops out when I was on the way back” she said and I gently tuck her hair behind her ear.  “Then lock the door behind me please” I told her and squeezed her hips gently.

I got to the grocery store fairly quickly, walking fast due to the rain that was only getting heavier as I walked. By the time I’d gotten to the store, my hoodie was already half soaked. 

I tugged on my hood, pulling it higher as I made my way to the produce aisle, grabbing 3 bags of sweetheart cherries before making my way to the baking isle for some sugar. 

While rounding the corner, since my head was down momentarily I bumped into someone, causing them to drop the boxes of cake mix they were holding “oh! Shit my bad!” I looked up at them, my heart sinking. 

I suddenly felt hot, my sweater felt itchy, my cheeks were flushed. It felt like I couldn’t breathe. I looked her up and down, my mouth dropping in to a gaping ‘o’. I felt bile rising in my throat, my stomach churning with anxiety. 

No. No. Not her. Not now. 

“Bear?” The name coming off of her tongue nearly made me gag. I shook my head quickly, squeezing my eyes shut and pulling my hood up further. 

“P-please. No. I-I’m. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Claire- I” I looked at her, then the boxes of cake mix, then her again. 

“I-uh- have T-T-t’go. Um-I-please don’t um-“ I took a shuttering breath. 

Unless I slice deep, she will keep trying with me. 

“Don’t- I- we can never be together. I-I-im sorry, Claire. I’m sorry” I turned around quickly heading to the registers. 

“Prick” she muttered as I briskly walked away. The word stung, but I surely deserved it. 

I shook my head, trying to brush off the brief unforeseen confrontation, as I rushed I clumsily almost knocked over a display of bouquets with roses and sunflowers, grabbing one before it fell off the shelf quickly, and instead of putting it back, I paused for a moment, looking at it as I thought, before I took them for Winnie and continued my walk to the registers. 

I dropped the cherries and the flowers onto the belt and digging my debit card out of my pocket. 

I need to get back to Honey. Wait, Honey. She’s gonna have honey, her tea- she’s always drinking tea. I didn’t even need fuckin’ sugar anyway.

“Do you have a rewards card?” The teen at the register asks glumly. 

“No, thanks.” I mumbled, putting my card in the reader as soon as he scanned the bags and flowers. 

“Do you want a bag?” He asked, and I looked at him annoyed. 

“Do I-? yes. Yes I want it bagged” 

Like, cmon, kid. lets keep this conversation goin, hm? why doesn’t Claire just get in line behind me right fuckin now? 

I thought bitterly to myself as he bagged the 3 bags of cherries and the flowers handed them to me. 

“Want your receipt?” He asked, but I was already headed up to the flower counter with the bag and the flowers. 

‘If you get a girl flowers, y’always get em wrapped, bear. Er’ y’re just givin’ em work. Simple, but impressive’

Was what Mikey had told me once upon a time. I’d never gotten a girl flowers before now, but they seemed to literally jump at me, and it couldn’t hurt after the day Winnie’s had.

I set the flowers on the counter, “can I have these uh- wrapped?” I asked the older woman tending the flower section. 

She nodded, smiling warmly. “Of course. Beautiful choice, if you’d like- we have cards you can write a message on” she motioned to the little table next to the flower stand. 

I looked over them, reading the different choices. I love you, happy birthday, I’m sorry, Just Because I love you - no. Too much.

I shook my head “no. Just uh- just wrapped, thanks.” I mumble, shoving my hand that wasn’t holding the bag in my pocket. 

“Who are these for, if you don’t mind?” She asked as she removed the cellophane, snipping the ends of the flowers at an angle and arranging them. 

“My- uh. This- she’s...we’re…seeing eachother.” I said awkwardly, biting the inside of my cheek. 

“Ahhh ok. So it’s new love then” she said, placing the flowers atop brown paper. 

My cheeks heat and I swallow thickly. She wasn’t wrong but it wasn’t right to call it love..yet. 

“I-I guess…maybe.” I said and she tied them up with twine around the paper, covering them in a clear plastic bag before sliding them in a brown paper one. 

“Stay dry out there” she told me and I nodded, heading towards the doors. 

“Thanks” I said simply, feeling too anxious to say anything else. 

If it hadn’t been pouring, I’d have taken my cigarettes out as soon as I got outside, but unfortunately for me- my hoodie was beginning to get soaked through, and I was starting to shiver because of the wind that was quickly picking up. 

The last fuckin’ thing I need right now is to be sick.

𝒲𝒾𝓃𝓃𝒾𝑒𝓈 𝒫.𝒪.𝒱. 🍯

I turned back to the tv, paying attention to a random Criminal Minds episode i’d put on in the living room while I cooked, watching as I cored the 8 tomatoes whilst waiting for the rice to finish boiling. 

This would be the only recipe I could bring to the table in our relationship, other than a few very simple dishes from my childhood my Gram had taught me how to cook plus my easy breakfasts, I was fairly lost in the kitchen. 

But I’d felt proud that at least one night he could let someone make something for him. I scooped the cores into the trash, saving the little lids. 

I was feeling much better now that I’d gotten paid and Sephys (as well as my own) food supplies weren’t dwindling. The cost of therapy ate up most of my checks, then rent, then utilities. So at the end of every month I was left pretty dry. I did whatever I could to not call Gram and ask her to spare me some money, it had happened a few times though, each time I did I was near an eviction notice or my lights getting shut off.

Even though she was insistent whenever I called that if I was struggling she’d be more then happy to send money and help out, I knew she kept tabs with mom, and whatever I said could make its way back to her. And the last thing I needed was her thinking I was failing out here, especially her. I’d never hear the end of it. 

I carefully chopped the onion the way my Gram taught me, chopping vegetables was much easier then meat, to me anyway. So my attempt came out much better then the chicken I’d murdered at lunch with Carmy the other day. 

Sephy jumps up on the counter and I gasp “seph! No! Naughty! Carm would have a heart attack” I quickly pick her up, going and putting her down on her cat tree. “You sleep here. You know that missy” 

I sighed softly to myself, padding over to the sink and washing my hands, drying them off quickly on Carmys shirt before going back to the onions. 

By the time I’d gotten the tomatoes stuffed and in the oven, as well as done a little cleaning of the kitchen, 

I’d laid down on the couch, remembering to set a timer for the food in the oven. I found myself getting drowsy, ending up falling asleep for what felt like 15 minutes until there was a soft knock at the door. I woke up, rubbing my eyes and humming happily to myself, going over and looking in the peephole to see darkness. 

I rolled my eyes playfully, “Carmy- c’mon. I know it’s you” I unlocked the door and as soon as I did it was forcefully thrown open, so hard that it left a mark on the wall. I jumped back in surprise and I swore my vision went fuzzy when I saw who it was. 

“I’ve been told you need me again, darling” he shut the door behind him, locking it swiftly.  

I’m trapped. 

“Joe- Joe..Joe…leave. Please leave” I said, backing up quickly, nearly tripping over my shoes in the entry hall. 

“No. No. I told you I tooold you” he approaches me slowly, like a snake hunting a mouse. 

“I don’t belong to you, anymore Joe” I tried to sound confident and menacing, but my voice came out much weaker then I intended. 

“Winnie, my sweet, sweet little Winnie the Pooh” he backs me into the corner of the living room, gently brushing his cold boney fingers over my cheek. 

I hadn’t even realized I’d been crying, until he swipes his forefinger up my skin and brings it to his lips, humming in satisfaction. 

Sick fuck. 

“It’s okay baby, I won’t hurt you unless you try to scream, you remember the rules, don’t you, be a good girl, and I give you what you need” he grabs my jaw roughly, knocking my head back into the wall for good measure. 

“What are the fucking rules, Winnow, say it” he growls. 

I’m never going to escape him. 

“I guess I have to remind you what happens when you don’t listen to me” he seethed in my ear and I felt my body go entirely numb with fear. 

➵ 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡♡♡ ⋙

[ciellunee]

You're mine, just mine

Summary- Itachi always considered izumi more and now you've had enough.

Pairing- Itachi X Reader

You were pissed. Absolutely pissed. He thinks everything is a joke and everyone is as calm as him, news flash it isn't like that. The argument you and itachi had was a long awaited one. Everybody knew izumi was madly in love with itachi, except itachi. He just wouldn't accept it no matter how many times you'd sit him down and tell him how she bats her bedroom eyes at him. He would knowingly hold his hands in public, hug him or cuddle him all the time sometimes even handfeed him making your blood boil with anger.

You were understanding, it was fine if itachi had female friends and their company. You never once tried to control his social life and neither did he but with Izumi it was different. She did it on purpose. Like this time, you planned a dinner date with itachi at this exotic hotel because uchiha boy really deserves fancy date nights. He were to pick you up at 6:00 PM but he never did. It was 7:15 when you got a text from him saying izumi fell and sprained her ankle. She called him crying and he had to take her to the hospital immediately. The text ended with "she's fine now don't worry. I'll call you in an hour let's see if I'll even make it home today, she really is hell bent on me staying with her tonight " No! Nothing about your dinner date, no apology, no 'I'll make it up for it' He didn't even mention the dinner date. He forgot. Hot tears running down your cheeks as your stomach churned. You've not had anything since morning because of the excitement. The beautiful velvet gown ripping your skin into pieces "I fucking hate you".

Itachi returned home at dawn, eyes heavy from lack of sleep. Trying to find the keys while on the porch he remembered the date. He was supposed to pick you up for dinner last night. "Ah! She must be really upset" he mumbled. Entering he came face to face with an absolute messed form of you. Mascara running down your cheeks dried and heavy. Eyes red and swollen as you opened your mouth, " I'm sorry Itachi i cannot do this anymore. " that's all you spoke before getting up and trying to leave the room. The Uchiha looked surprisingly shocked. " I know I've upset you my love but I don't quite comprehend what you meant by that ?" He asked voice laced with anger. " I mean I can't fucking pretend I'm happy with you, you're being inconsiderate towards me and my feelings, past month you've barely asked me if I'm okay! All you care about is your goddamn izumi. I am fucking done with you Itachi Uchiha, I don't want to be with you anymore and I am leaving right fucking now! " you yelled till out of breath. The Uchiha tried stopping you, reasoning with you saying stuff like "baby she needed me she was in pain" or " you know I have no romantic interest in her" but you were too exhausted to hear.

Third day after the unofficial breakup you did what had to be done. Wore a red mini dress with a deep sweetheart neck. Tight on all the right places with indecent amount of cleavage put to show. Your stomach burned with guilt and nervousness but one drink and it was all good. At the bar you met Kakashi who looked extra hot today. " fancy meeting you here " you slid beside him, for a moment he scanned you top to bottom, then replied " glad I am or would've missed seeing you look so sexy in that bodycon. " a lot of drinks and a lot of flirting led to him taking you by surprise for a kiss. You closed your eyes and thought of a certain black haired guy. Kakashi's lips were soft and he was definitely a great kisser but it all came to an end when you felt a familiar chakra. He was here and it's no good if he sees you making out with kakashi. You pulled apart " it was a mistake kakashi I'm so sorry " you mumbled and silver haired man looked confused but smiled and let you go. Why'd you let him go? Why was itachi here and even if he was....you guys were no longer together you could do whatever you felt like doing. "Ugh too much for a night gotta sleep" you mumbled as you got yourself and uber and went home. Reaching, you realised door was unlocked...

" Hello my little slut " itachi hissed as you went inside. He was in the kitchen sharpening a knife. " Oh! Don't worry this is for the man who had the honour of touching you first and last time" voice laced with spite.

" Don't even try itachi keep kakashi out of this "

" pretty little slut scared for her new play toy? Did you forget who I am? Do I have to remind you? " He moved a step closer then another step.

He got you in a tight grip, hands held to the back, face pushed to a wall. " so baby, tell me who do you love? " He said as his hands travelled through the mini dress and reached you ass. He spanked you hard on the right cheek earning a big whine from you.

" answer me!" Another slap.

" you ,I love you " you cried as another slap hit you hard.

" Good girl, who's slut are you? Who owns you ? " another slap

"Y-you" you whimpered

" Will you ever in your life pull this stunt again my angel ? "

"N-NO itachi please it hurts so much stop " you cried again, eyes welled with tears.

" I will stop once you realise YOU'RE MINE, JUST MINE! and if you hoe around I will punish your sorry little cunt and you will let me. I will make you come 10 times and fill you up with my semen so much that you'll forget anything but me and my cock. Am I making myself clear here ? "

"Ye-yes sir!" You stutter as the final slap hits your right cheek. Pussy dripping wet from all the arousal.

" don't think I'm done yet love.....you're going to pay a lot more than just some spanks for the little stunt you pulled......... "

[orangevtae]

A Dream is a Wish [Joel Miller x Reader]

Summary: While being in and out of counsciousness, Joel ends up dreaming of a scenery where everything is normal again, where Ellie is part of your lifes and where Sarah is alive with the three of you, truly the family dream that he always wanted.

Warnings: Fluff but hurt too. Alluring of episodes 6 and 7 of the show so SPOILERS. Blood and injuries. Stabilished relationship.

A/N: i'm gonna post as many Pedro and TLOU content as i can, i will 🥴🥴 enjoy! <3

Joel trembled a little as he heard someone knock on his bedroom door, scaring him out of his deep slumber.

He didn't know what time was it but he could tell that it was early since the sunlight that came from his window shone right down on his face, making him squeeze his eyes and look to the clock on his bedside table. 07:00 AM shone deeply in red on the display of it and that made Joel frown cause there was no way he could have an automatic clock like this one cause there was no more use for it in the scenery where he lived now.

A little atonished by it, he took a look around the room, noticing that he wasn't on his trashy apartment on the Boston QZ with it's crampling walls and barely there furniture, instead, he was back on his old room on his old house in Texas and if he was founding it strange before, he was plenty sure that he had gone nuts now. Everything was the same with the only difference is that his clothes weren't around the room in a mess pile and on the other side of where he was lying, was an empty space that was neatly untouched. He got up and dressed some of his clothes that were gathered around the floor and got out of the room.

He heard some laugh coming from downstairs and he distinguished three different voices, the frown still deep on his forehead as he slowly got downstairs and stopped dead on his track at the scene he found when he looked to the kitchen.

You were making coffe for the both you on his coffee machine, the smell of it almost all around the house. Ellie was on the table, reading one of her comic books while probably waiting breakfeast be ready. And when he looked to the stove, Sarah was there, making her infamous scranble eggs.

Joel felt like crying, his eyes started to burn with unshed tears as he looked to Sarah's back, how her hair would move back and forth while mixing the eggs and ge even rubbed his eyes to make sure he was seeing right, that this wasn't just a trick his mind was putting on him.

"You could help your sister to make breakfeast you know?" you mumbled as pouring the coffe on two mugs.

"Why? i would probably burn whatever i try to touch, at least Sarah can make scranble eggs" Ellie shrug it off and you just shook your head at her.

"I think it's better like that, Ell's the worst at the kitchen and probably would put the house on fire trying to fry bacon" Sarah chuckled and Ellie sent her an mouthed "fuck off" that only made Sarah laugh louder and get back to the eggs.

"I saw that" you mumbled at her and a smirk was present on her face.

Joel quickly cleaned his face for any remanents of tears that could have fallen down without him noticing and got inside the kitchen, making the three of you turn towards him, soft smiles on the faces of three persons he loved most in the world. All together.

"Look who woke up!" you smiled at him.

"I was thinking that you had died in your sleep from heart attack or some other disease old people have" Ellie smirked up at him.

"Ellie!" you hissed at her "Jesus..."

"Morning dad!" Sarah beamed happily, turning the stove off and running to her father's arm, delivering a quick peck on his cheek.

"Good morning ladies, you slept well?" he let out after Sarah got back to the eggs

"We did, honey. Breakfeast ready so have a sit" you beamed at him.

"Mornin' grumpy" Ellie said to him as she got up, giving him a hug as she passed trough him to go to the kitchen.

"Mornin' kid" he hugged her back and walked to where you where at.

"Here" You said, handing him his mug of coffee while he got closer to the balcon on the kitchen.

"Thank you, darlin'" he said, giving a little kiss in your cheek.

"Erm...no pancakes?" Ellie asked as she looked on the cabinet that the pancake mix usually was.

"Ask your dad, he was supposed to buy it" you answered her, taking a sip of your coffee.

"Really dad?" Sarah frowned.

"I'm sorry, i promise i will buy a cake" he smiled at three of you.

It was in that moment that Joel noticed that this day was familiar to him, because that day happened before. That day was the day everything happened, the beggining of the pandemic, the day he had lost Sarah. He ate breakfeast with a frown on his face.

That day started similar to the one he's having now, but at the same time it was different. You and Ellie where on scene now, you reprimanding her and Sarah and Ellie laughing together at some pun she delivered were new things. Even Tommy was there, with the old man jokes. Everything was the same at the same time it wasn't.

The same dialogues where being told and heard with the additions of your and Ellie's comments, the table at the dinning room was full and there was laugh, bickering and...and looked out of picture even though this was right, Joel felt a happy buzz forming on the pity of his stomach.

"Honey?" he heard you mumble "Honey?"

"What?" he got out of his daze, he looked the hand that was on his now with a golden ring above one that had tiny diamonds in it, you got engaged and had an engagement ring? When he had given to you?

"You okay hon'? You seem out today, did you really slept well?" you asked concerned.

"I...i'm okay darling, just zoned out a bit. Nothing to worry for" he smiled at you.

"You sure?" you asked again, just to make sure.

"I am" he grabbed your hand and brought to his lips, delivering a kiss on your knuckles "Have i ever lied to you?"

"You did yes" you let out a chuckle, joking about it "But if you saying so"

"I am" he kissed your knuckles again "I know that lying to my wife means instant death"

"Okay, gross!" Ellie said outloud, she had a funny expression looking at you both.

"Yeah, we just want to have breakfeast without you two smooching each others faces" Sarah laughed, throwing a piece of her egg at you both.

"Hey, don't throw eggs at us cause you guys can't have smoochies" you said, mimicking kisses at both girls and you all laughed about it.

Joel didn't know what was happening but he wouldn't trade it for nothing. He got to see Sarah again, smiling, laughing, well. He got to see you and Ellie making her laugh, telling jokes and be silly. He got to see Ellie being comfortable at the table, like she was belonged to the picture, like she was always meant to be laughing and joking with Sarah.

He took a look around the house and got to see pictures of your wedding with him. How happy the both of you looked on them, how amazing and beautiful you looked on them, just like he imagined that it was going to be.

He decided to not go work, he would stay home with you, while waiting the girls to get back for school while he asked Tommy to say that he fell ill to cover him up. He got out to buy the cake he promised Sarah that day after he left her and Ellie at the school.

He got his new-old pulse clock that was now fixed when Sarah and Ellie got back from school, them saying that they had the money from him but still doing it for him, for his birthday.

When night came, the four of you (plus uncle Tommy of course) got to sing him Happy Birthday with ridiculous party hats on your heads and big smiles on your faces while he blow the candles.

"You wished something dad?" Sarah asked.

"If i tell, it won't come true" he frowned at her.

"C'mon dude, don't be a dick!" Ellie huffed and you all laughed.

"For all the days to be just like this one, with my family, the people i love most in the world" he smiled at all of you.

The night came and with it, Joel's worry. Worry that everything was gonna happen all over again and that he would fail Sarah again, that he would fail Ellie and that he would fail you.

But none of it happened, there wasn't anything going on the whole day, there wasn't police cars or helicopters going back and forward, Tommy wasn't arrested and Joel got to spend the whole night with his family with the four of you all together, just like he wanted, just like he always dreamed. Just like that day was supposed to go as: with his girls slept on his arms, your head resting on one of his thighs as his favorite movie was passing by on tv.

While Joel was dreaming, in and out of counciousness, you and Ellie were worried about him. He had a fever some hours ago and now he had a bit of sweat on his face as he mumbled on his sleep, he was smiling slightly.

Ellie managed to stitch his wound with thread and a needle she found while you runned around to find him medicine and things that could help to not infectionate his wound, it stopped bleeding when Ellie stitched up but maybe there could be an infection and Joel has lost too many blood, his skin has lost it's color and you were worried, the little bit of relief you could have was knowing that whatever he was dreaming about, was good cause Joel never smiled when he went to sleep and usually he had nightmares about the day Sarah died.

Even though you were worried with him and his well-being, you felt relief knowing that his pain didn't achieve him on his sleep this time, you had heard yours, Ellie's and Sarah's name come out of his mouth and you knew that at least for a while, he could be happy with the scenery that was going trough his head, while you and Ellie were trying your best to keep him alive.

[crazy-bi-btch]

Revenge

a/n: anon I hope you enjoy because this gave me sever bi-panic🥵😌

Summary/Pairing: Y/n AKA Tiger and Natasha AKA Phoenix have serious history that leaves her TopGun squadron shocked.

Warnings: angst (as always), grammar errors (maybe),  mentions of death, risky behavior

WC: 2.3k

Phoenix wasn’t new to the egoistic and cocky behavior of her her fellow aviator male coworkers, she knew she was superior than their toxic masculinity. 

But when it came to female aviators, like herself, insecurity was very much present in her. 

Especially with Y/n better known as ‘Tiger’.

It all started back in the Navy strike fighter squadron, Naval Air Station AKA the Black Aces. Before Miramar, their was Lemoore, California- her personal hell.

It was the first time Tiger and Phoenix met, both graduated top of their class, amazing fighter jet pilots. Their superiors agreed, they were just born to fly. It all started friendly during their first week, by the second time they flew, tensions was felt around every time they hopped out their jets, followed by snarky comments that fueled their ‘friendly competition’. One night, back in the dorms, Phoenix had overheard her other female teammates snickering about Tiger and Phoenix. 

“ They are such show offs!”

“ I know but if I where to put money on one of them, Tiger would beat her in milliseconds.”

“ No way, have you seen Phoenix-”

“ She plays it safe, that will get you no where in the real deal.” By this time Phoenix was enraged to say the least. She stormed over to the Y/N door, knocking on her door in a frenzy. Y/N open the door with a playful smirk crossing her arms.

“ Well, whata’ friendly surprise.” Natasha rolled her eyes and with a challenging stance she began her proposal.

“ Words around the Admirals are looking for a team leader.” She cocked her eyebrow, copying Tiger’s stance. Tiger mocked a laugh.

“ Oh really, well what do you want to do about it?”

“ Tomorrow 09:00 AM sharp. The admirals will be in a meeting near the office that has view of our flight.” Tiger frowned, thought for a second, being the team leader would probably be the best thing to rub into Phoenix’s face.

“ Deal.” Phoenix stuck her hand out to shake on it, narrowing her eyes on Tiger. She just stared at her outreached hand and scoffed before shutting the door in her face. Oh it’s on bitch, Phoenix thought.

The dorm’s soon heard about Phoenix’s and Tiger’s planned stunt, bet’s and chaos rang through the shower rooms. Tiger was nervous, not about winning, but of any sanctions she might receive for Phoenix stupid jealousy. Phoenix was full of adrenaline, she could fall off a roof right now and not feel a thing. The only thing was to stun her teammates and admiral’s enough to make her team leader, its all she wanted. She was not going to let stupid Tiger get in the way.

It didn’t take much to bribe their teammates to help set up their flight, most of them stood outside admiring as if  they were about to watch a UFC fight. Two of their fellow classmates volunteer to time them. As they walked out in their flight suits and helmet on, Phoenix and tiger looked at each other with so much hatred, they would both be dead if looks could kill.

Once in their jets, comms began initiating their statues.

“ Any last words Phoney?” Tiger mocked into her mic, Phoenix fumed.

“ Saving them for when I beat your ass.” 

Tiger laughed, “ Oh Phoney, you always know how to make me laugh.”

It didn’t take long before they flew into the sky, reaching 1 through 7 G’s. The admirals paused their briefing as they saw and heard commotion outside their big window, after lifting the blinds, they felt their soul leave their body. They all ran out to find the other fellow aviators cheering and laughing.

“ Someone wants to tell me what is going on here?” Admiral Jones boomed, his face turning red in anger. Once the aviators settled down and saluted respectfully to their superiors.

“ Are those F-18’s in the sky right now?!” Admiral Canary asked looking up at the sky where Tiger and Phoenix raced into the clouds.

“ Guys, hearing from the ground, Admirals are aware.” Comms spoke nervously, everyone was at stake of sanctions just for Phoenix and Tigers’s stunt. This competition just got dangerous for everyone. Phoenix and Tiger ignored the warning, and continued the route they had planned. 

“ Comms, remind me to collect my money after I win.” Tiger teased on the radio, based on the timer, Tiger was 5 seconds ahead of Phoenix, the rage within her fueled as she heard her voice over comms. 

“ Keep talkin’ outta your ass- that’ll just give me more satisfaction once I win.” Tiger tsked over her mic.

“Now, Now Phoney, let’s keep it PG here.” Phoenix snapped while accelerating her speed enough to surpass Tiger, flying over her jet at a dangerous pace that shocked Tiger. 

Back on the ground, their fellow teammates caved into the Admirals orders. Soon it was known who was up in the air. Both of their best female pilots had taken it way too far. In reality, they had noticed and received complaints from the other aviators for both their aggressive and competitive nature. They knew they were the strongest and best of the squadron, but risking government property and their lives over a position was not going to cut it.

Phoenix laughed as she heard comms state Phoenix was in the lead, they were 5 minutes away from landing and completing their agreed route. 

Tiger smirked as she heard Phoenix laugh, she had something up her sleeve. There were no rules installed, besides not killing each other while in the air. On the ground, that’s a different story.

 Tiger made sure to slow down before leveling down enough to fly under Phoenix. Phoenix was too caught up with her sudden urge of victory to realize Tiger was literally under her. Once Tiger had enough space and calculated her time enough she bite her lip, praying softly and blasted forward and abruptly up just in time before Phoenix’s jet got in the way. Phoenix turned a shade of white in fear but soon replaced with red in anger. She saw as Tiger began descending, she was far enough to win.

  “ Comms, I’m ready to land.” Tiger spat, triumph oozing in her voice.

“ Preparing for landing. Phoenix?” comms asked.

“ Shut up.” Phoenix spat, she buzzed with anger and she knew exactly what she would do once she landed.

As Tiger landed 10 seconds before Phoenix landed as well. The teammates who were timing them, stopped the timer. The admiral snatched the timer out their hands and they all stomped over to the the now  parked jets. Phoenix punched and screamed into her canopy before the ladder and canopy lifted. Just as they both hopped off, Phoenix charged after her, ignoring the admirals who where awaiting them to give them an earful about their reckless behavior. 

Tiger was tackled by Phoenix, “ You cheating, sneaking bitch!” Phoenix spat as she shoved her into the ground, Tiger angrily fought back shoving her on the ground as well, toppling over her pinning her down with a smug smirk.

“ Phoney, don’t be a sore loser.” Phoenix growled shoving her again, before the admiral pulled them apart.

“ Ladies! IN MY OFFICE NOW!” 

Both Phoenix and Tiger stood in front of the desk of their superior. Trying so hard to avoid eyesight with anyone.

“ Not only did you put both you lives on line, but also your team. This is government property for god’s sake, do you know the damage we would have? Over a stupid rivalry.” Both girls turned red in embarrassment. “ A disgrace for the squadron, is this what we teach you guys? We are suppose to be a team!” Admiral Canary walked in and dropped off two sets of folders on his desk. He sighed and sat down, it was Phoenix and Tiger’s files. Fear soon took over both  their eyes and  for the first time they looked at each other. 

“ You ladies leave me no choice.” 

Those were the last words they both heard before sent to their dorms. Both of them were sanctioned with disciplinary actions. Neither of them got the one thing the wanted, quite the opposite actually. 

Phoenix was put on cleaning duty for 2 months, and temporarily banned from flying for a month. Tiger on the other hand, since she already had a sanction for sneaking into the men’s dorms during her first week of the Black ace’s, The girl has need, Admiral Canary filed an order to move Tiger to a different squadron. Tiger was in tears, angry tears, as she packed her stuff she vowed to become the best aviator in the world just to avenge stupid Phoenix. 

As the gray bus pulled up at the steps of the dorm, Y/N said goodbye to her dorm mates. Natasha stood arms crossed with a stone cold face. She was glad Tiger was leaving, she still had hope in herself to get back on her superiors good side. It didn’t help that now her squadron were pissed at her. As Y/N stared at Natasha, they both narrowed their eyes at each other, anger and annoyance in their glare.

 She walked over, with one last smirk she snickered, “ We will see each other again.” Phoenix frowned and before she could say anything she had walked away and in the bus.

 Phoenix had nightmares of that day, reliving her loss to Tiger. She prayed she would never see her again. She just couldn’t bare the jealousy and stress Tiger gave her.

3 years had passed, enough for things to calm down in both Phoenix and Tiger’s life. 

Tiger was called back to TopGun for a special assignment, she also had a couple of her long time aviator friends get called back with her. It was exciting especially being back in Miramar. As they made their way to their squadron dorms she settled in quite well to the humid weather.

That night, they all decided to celebrate their arrival back by going to the HardDeck Bar on base by the beach. Tiger and her fellow aviator friends wore their freshly pressed kaki uniform, making sure to walk with stride in to the crowded bar full of aviators as well. It didn’t take long for some of the scattered aviators to migrate to Tiger. She beat some major record over her las 3 years, a reason that she took pride in. Her smirk and laugh rang through the bar. It caught a specific group, by the pool table Phoenix and Bob sat by the pool table, dealing with Hangman’s annoying and cocky behavior. Payback and Coyote drinking a beer as well. Rooster was bickering with Hangman as well standing across from the tables, who was playing against Fanboy. 

Soon the conversations stopped as Hangman caught sight of  Y/N and the amount of attention she received he lifted himself and gave a small smile that made everyone followed his gaze. Phoenix frowned and turned around and practically spit her beer out. 

Y/N was standing around all the kaki dressed aviators in the front of the  HardDeck, all of them basically kissing her ass. She turned around closing her eyes and praying this is just another one of her nightmare. Rooster glanced from Y/n to Natasha who looked completely different from her typical demeanor - almost like she’d seen a ghost.

Tiger soon locked eyes with the familiar back stature of a female with the typical black military bun. She made sure to walk over with a smirk big enough to kill Phoenix. Tiger crossed her arms as she took the steps up to the other gawking aviators and the only that was avoiding her presence.

“ Phoney, is that you?” Phoenix grimaced at the sound of her dramatic voice, yep this is really happening, she opened her eyes and saw that stupid smile. Phoenix looked small and inferior compared to her, especially for the first time to her new squadron. Hangman soon frowned and looked towards both of you. Bob as well, nudging Phoenix to stand up. The tension between them had everyone on edge. 

“ Phoney? Haven’t heard that one.” Hangman chuckled, Phoenix shot a death glare to him before standing up and crossing her arms facing her, stone cold.

“ Well, look what the cat dragged in.” Phoenix gritted  between her teeth, Tiger laughed softly and tilted her head.

“ Last time I checked, I dragged you in the sky, remember?” Tiger mocked Phoenix tone back at her. This only made the situation even more tense.

 Hangman was enjoying this, Coyote nervously watched, Bob fidgeted with his beer bottle watching and waiting for Phoenix to speak up about this ‘situation’. Rooster did not like the way Natasha was being treated and went to by her side.

“ Is there a problem here?” Y/N held her mouth from laughing out loud, Hangman and  Fanboy also held in their laugh. 

“ Oh Phoney, I didn’t know you had knight in shining hawaiian shirt.” She dramatically gasped and ‘aw’-ed at Rooster’s gesture. “ Dude, news flash, the 80′s what they’re pedo-stash back.” That was enough for Rooster to look down at his shirt wondering whats wrong with it as well as touching his mustache and looking at his teammates in confusion. Phoenix closed her eyes trying to contain herself as everyone around her tried containing their laughs at Tiger’s comebacks.

Y/n sighed before glancing at Phoenix’s squadron and back to her. A look that had everyone feel insecure, “ But the question here is, will he save you up in the air?” She smirked teasingly as she point at the the sky. Rooster gave up and walked towards his drink, and sat next to bob, slightly hurt.  Tiger mockingly waved goodbye and turning back to the rest of the bar where her friends all took her to the bar. 

Rooster stood back up, hurriedly towards Phoenix ,who’s jaw looked tight enough it could break, her eyes fixated where Y/N stood once. “ What the hell was that?” Phoenix rolled her eyes, she did not want to talk about this, especially with the squadron she just met. Hangman let out an exaggerated sigh, “Phoenix, didn’t know you had enemies.” Payback made his way over by Rooster curiosity hitting everyone.

“ Phoenix, c’mon, who is that?” Phoenix reached for her beer and chugged it before muttering in annoyance.

“Tiger.” It practically gave everyone chills as they glanced at Tiger who was drinking around her friends, making sure to catch their glances and winking at them. 

Phoenix and Tiger were back at it again, this time she doesn’t know if things will get any better or worse. All she knew was that Y/N did not see this as mission to complete, but as revenge. She could sense it.

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

Get Me to the Church On Time Pt. 2

Series Summary: It's Dean and Julie's wedding day. What could go wrong?

Chapter Summary: Julie is wondering where Dean is and what's taking the boys so long.

Series Warnings/Explicit 18+: Some show level violence, eventual smut, fluff, smidge of angst. Chapters will have individual warnings.

Chapter Warnings: None, Julie's turn to be an anxious bean, fluff.

Pairings: Dean Winchester x OFC (Julie)

Word Count: 527

**I sincerely apologize for putting this series up a second time. For some bizarro reason, Tumblr won't let me edit them, and they don't open properly when I click on them, it's being a giant pain, so I'm hoping if I repost them, I can change what I need and fix the problem. 🤞🏼🤞🏼**

A/N: Dean and Julie are back! Each part will vary between 500+ and 2000+ words. I will be releasing all the parts today, September 15th, as part of my 1K follower celebration! 😊💓

The parts will be released as follows:

Part 1 - 8:00 AM

Part 2 - 10:00 AM

Part 3 - 12:00 PM

Part 4 - 3:00 PM

Part 5 - 6:00 PM ||

*Times are all based on CST*

A/N 2: So, as I stated this mini-series is part of my 1K followers celebration. For the celebration I asked people to send in gif prompts, or requests for me to write, all of which would be posted on my birthday, which is TODAY! 🎉

I only ended up with 6 prompts/requests, so I thought I would mix the prompts in with my own ideas, and I decided to write this little mini-series as well as a (hopefully) special surprise for those who enjoyed Dean and Julie in Green is My Favorite Color.

At 7:00 PM, I will post my last fic for the celebration, the first chapter of my sequel series, I Will Find You in the Dark!

Hope you enjoy my contributions for the day! 😘😘

Both beautiful text dividers, below and at the bottom, were created by @talesmaniac89. 💓 Title card was designed by me.

"Julie," Charlie chided, "you're gonna wear the carpet out."

"Good, it's hideous anyway." Jody answered for her. "Let's put an end to it once and for all!"

Julie stopped and looked back at the two women who made up her bridal party and threw her hands up. "Where is he?"

Both women came to her side to soothe her, each taking one of her hands, Jody on the left and Charlie on the right.

Charlie shrugged. "You know how those guys get, lose their heads if they weren't screwed on. I'm sure they're on their way."

"They were supposed to be on their way already! Julie cried, frustration and fear oozing out of her. "Cas zapped himself out of here to go get them a half hour ago. The motel is ten minutes away! We have a church full of guests out there!"

Jody patted her hand. "Sweetie, it's a dozen or so crotchety hunters, they'll keep."

Julie pulled away from the women to resume her pacing.

"He's not coming. He's talked himself out of it."

Jody shook her head. "Sweetie that man is so besotted with you it's amazing he ever actually leaves your side."

Charlie nodded. "She's right, Julie. Dean is madly in love with you, you're all he ever talks about."

Julie was shaking her head frantically. "No, it was a mistake to separate from him last night. Stupid traditions, can't see the bride before the wedding - idiocy! That man is a flight risk!" She said, throwing her arms up in defeat.

Charlie walked directly in front of Julie and forced her to stop pacing once again. She spoke in calming tones. "Julie, I promise you he's coming."

She took Julie's hand again and began to rub the back soothingly. "Look, he's told me that in the past he walked away from you a few times and hurt you, but that he swore to you he'd never leave you again."

Julie smiled softly. "He told you about that?"

Charlie grinned. "Vodka may have been flowing freely, but yes, he told me. And he tells me often how perfect you are and how much he doesn't deserve you. And when I say he's wrong, he says that it doesn't matter cause unless you ever, 'get smart enough to chuck him'," Charlie said, using finger quotes, "he's staying with you."

She gave Julie a quick, reassuring hug. "He'll be here, sweetie."

As Charlie pulled out of the hug, Julie smoothed down her little, white, cotton wedding dress and tried to breathe deeply. Charlie and Jody were right, of course. Dean wouldn't hurt her like that. Even if he was panicking a little, he'd come talk to her about it. He wouldn't just leave.

A small frown marred her brow again. But then, where was he?

Just as the thought entered her mind, the sound of smashing, screaming and yelling came from the front of the church. The women all froze for a moment before racing out to the sanctuary to see what was going on.

They skidded to a halt as they ran through the door and saw the scene in front of them.

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[sylvieeee5]

it's finally time...

for episode 3!!!

please pardon my lateness- I had family over last week, and then I got the second booster shot and it knocked me out for a couple days!

But we're BACKKKK

And here's a Sonic for your troubles :)

Oh! And if you'd like to support my poor time management skills, I would greatly appreciate if you'd consider donating to my Kofi! haha. i'm. broke

!Warning!! Book/show spoilers ahead!

1:27

"Welp, guess they jumped overboard. Alright, back to dinner, everyone!"

2:38

How'd you get that figure? Did Kate tell you?

"Alright gang, stay calm, we don't want them to hear us. By the way, we're 120 feet over the ocean, so uh... don't look down."

2:47

Down? Shouldn't you have gone up??

3:12

...do you think constance has a evil plan pre-formed in case she ever decides to go rogue?

3:17

she hopped on the ruse train :)

y'all ever hear a good word and decide hm! nice word! i will use it Always from now on

3:47

what do you mean

4:55

Number Two's plan B is biological warfare!! love that for her

5:00

HDSGDJWAKYGASYDGAKDAGK

5:43

I think you can be as judgmental as you want when it comes to his second mind control scheme in as many years

6:12

fambly,,,

6:25

ahahahaaaaaaaa

ha

7:07

UNBOTHERED Q UE E N

8:08

????????????????????

noland HUH

8:20

babies-

9:05

JKUCAKYCAIUCKUICQHWXKKHGAJCSH DACAJHSHASGSAASU

constance wants a taste

9:59

gambling montage hell yeah!!

10:27

смерть или слава.

i absolutely love that they made her russian vsjdaskdf

11:45

GIRLBOSS

i know nothing about gambling so that was. interesting to watch with no context jasfkjs

11:58

please let the pie truck be connected to moocho in some way please pl

12:41

"I'm highly concerned about the lion in this cave. Oh, what's that? I've stumbled upon a pile of meat and am being invited to sit on it? Well, why not?"

12:54

no it ain't, nathaniel

13:57

roll credits kinda!

14:20

YES TRUEEEE

impromptu parenting seminar with ms perumal. we love to see it

15:23

hehehe! same. haaaaaaaah

16:13

gfhjhgfhgh

okay but how is that considered cheating?? it's a strategy!

16:24

and NO SHAME

17:22

i mean... true enough

then again i somehow doubt this is a legal operation so if you're stealing from criminals, two wrongs make a right! /j

17:43

GIRL PLEASE

17:56

kinda thought this guy was risker when i saw the trailer. guess not!

18:25

Ahhh, you can totally take him. You just have to make it outside and them sic Madge on 'im! Just... don't look.

19:25

oh right, international waters. no laws! don't look that up, i promise it's true

19:47

the earnestness of that line awwww

Good job, Reynie. Applejack would approve!

20:04

Those "water polo" players are lucky Martina's not here. You do not besmirch the name of sports in her presence- unlike Kate she won't hesitate, bitch.

20:24

........?

20:35

SURRENDERRRRRRRRRRR

i love cannonball oh my god

21:28

...that line, and referring to his followers as "family" is.... really reminding me of my own experience in a similar organization. Man.

22:14

...excuse me a second

22:19

NO WE DON'T ENLIGHTEN US PLEASE

22:52

.... given what we know about constance that somehow seems competely plausible

23:32

Not so "equal in weight", huh, Atalanta?

rip milligan's luggage :(

23:57

DFKUFUAKJHJKASDGSJSKDAHJASDGKJGFYJSAYGGFSEY

THAT LINE DELIVERY

BLESS YOU FRED MELAMED

24:16

these are children you two

24:28

OOOOOOOOOH

she just called your ship sad. with class!

love that kate really is expanding her vocab- she didn't lie to milligan in ep 1!

25:30

do they not have passports?? did they leave them behind with the adults?

25:37

yoink

25:53

What happened to "Nicholas, I've moved on?"

26:02

if you're going through the grieving process simply say "no"

26:33

Unlike last season, the bright yellow is actually very effective camouflage in a lemon grove!

(also, little bit of trivia- coastal Italy does have the ideal climate for growing lemons!)

26:48

free snacks for the road ayyy

27:02

they sound like they're looking for their lost dog shakjdsl

27:21

sebastian's brokennnnnn

27:54

UH OHHHHHHH

28:03

UH OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

28:48

the engineering on that luggage cube must be insane because the ones on top are essentially floating

29:08

which was not very from your perspective! was that a diss?

29:23

and now i'm laughing bc i'm thinking of the chekhov's gun bit from the goes wrong show s2 ajaskhjh

29:46

And there's an example of one right there!

30:05

"But today I learned that morality is relative!"

so has reynie's "oh no humanity might be evil" arc been replaced with a "humanity's evil so i'm gonna lean into it lmao" arc?

30:31

constance over there like "oh? really? yes a completely figurative saying imagine that"

30:50

highly, highly accurate

and also

31:13

31:40

jeffers was in curtain's drama club in college and curtain couldn't stand him but he was on board for the evil scheme stuff so what can you do.

32:13

aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAA???

32:46

more evidence for the drama club theory. gotta pose dramatically before even attempting to hail one of the numerous nearby cabs to follow them! you go king.

Alright! That was episode 3: A Gold Bar in Fort Knox. I feel like this was sort of a transitional episode, and I'm... not sure how I feel about that. The Shortcut and the people on it were a huge part of the book's journey, and here... it's just used to get from point A to point B, rather than being an interesting stop of its own. With that, I'm gonna have to give this one a 7/10. I really hope they do more with Noland and Cannonball down the line... But I am fascinated to see where the brainwashed Mr. Benedict plot goes...

See you all shortly for episode 4!

[lifeaftermotherhood]

Motherhood Is A Little Bit Of Joy And No Fun At All

The fluffy, soft, comforting feel of my favorite throw blanket under my bare feet; and the aroma of hot chamomile tea brings a smile to my face as Captain Sandy fires someone on the TV in front of me. After a grueling day of motherhood, I finally have a sense of peace come over me as I enjoy a television show that doesn’t include Peppa Pig or some annoying kid YouTube sensation. 

Even thought Below Deck has captured my attention for a few moments, I can’t help but look at the clock as it inches towards 10:00 PM. If I don’t go to sleep now, I’ll be groggy and grumpy when my kids wake me up at 7 AM tomorrow. My life has become a series of trying to squeeze in a few moments of alone time in between breaking up fights, making meals that no one eats, and being a snack whore. 

Parenting...specifically motherhood- is not fun. Actually, it sucks. Here is where you are probably expecting me to insert some lame disclaimer like, “but it’s so worth it!” Well, you’re not gonna find a disclaimer here, sister, There is nothing fun about being woken up in the middle of the night because your kid peed their bed and is soaking wet. There is nothing fun about doing the laundry for four people daily. There is nothing fun about working a 9-5 and coming home to be a servant. There is nothing fun about being a stay at home mom and losing your identity.

No one ever warns you or talks about these things before you have kids. They all tell you about how great it is. The nostalgic look of love comes over a mother’s face as she reminisces about the days when her fifteen year old was an infant. They tell you to enjoy every moment and that you need to cherish these times. 

Yes, I miss the newborn smell...that was a little bit of joy. Yes, I loved seeing my son help a little old man who dropped his change on the floor at the mall...that was a little bit of joy. Watching my youngest put his dad’s boots on and dance around...that was truly joyful. But the trial, tribulations and pain you have to go through on a minute to minute basis just to get to those bits of joy is what makes me wonder if I made the right choice in becoming a mother.

People have said, “if you hate parenting you’re probably doing it right. You're working hard day in day out to make sure you’re raising good, competent, kind, loving humans who respect themselves and others; but even still, these tiny children don’t owe you anything and you have given them everything.

[catsloveandrockandroll]

The witch and the Priest

Hello Everxone this here is my first attemot at a story that I thought about. <what do you think sofar?

Thanks

The Universe is a funny wild thing. She will put you in the most insane situations and just hope for the best. She will lift you up and if you get too cocky she will throw you down so fast that you will not even know what is going on.

I on the other hand had no intention of getting myself into the absolute chaos . The universe had other plans.

I will start with the beginning. I think this way whoever is reading this will understand the shit show a little better.

6 months ago deep in the dark woods in odenwald, Germany.

The spring had come. The morning sun warmed the dew filled grass. Birds singing filled the air as the people in the small town began to start their day. Life was waking up from its long winter slumber.

In one of the small houses, a typical old German Fachwerkhaus home. The house was lovely, the walls were white and the open wooden beams glared in their ruby red pride.  The beams followed each of the floors in the house, they were also diagonal. They created w beautiful criss cross pattern upon the white paint. The house slouched slightly to the left and the wooden framed windows were closed.

Small square stones led the way from the street to the front door.  Inside the cozy home were wooden floors and an open high ceiling.

The home was being cared for by a couple name Emma and Jens Schwarz. A young couple, Emma is 32 and Jens is 35 years old.  They both worked and had no children. Emma a slender dark haired woman with large green eyes and olive skin worked as a legal assistant in a nearby town. Jens worked as a plumber for the city.

Like usual Emma and Jens had their coffee together in their kitchen. Compared to the other rooms the kitchen was small but it was more than enough for the pair.

There were fresh fruit on the marbel counter. Jens noticed that Emma looked tired there were dark rings around her eyes.

Jens said “How did you sleep last night?” Emma looked at him in a dissatisfied stare. “I am fine. I know I look terrible, but I swear I slept through the night. I do not know why I look like shit.”

Jens looked at Emma, his blue eyes looked concerned. He noticed she had not been sleeping well the last few nights. Maybe there was something going on at work.  He did not know. What he did know is that Emma was always beautiful no matter what. He loved her more than anything. He just did not know how to tell her. He told her that he loved her but it did not do it any justice.

“ You look wonderful, as always. I am just worried at you are over stressed and you are not getting enough sleep. What can I do to help you?” Jens said as he sipped from his coffee. He liked his coffee with a little bit of milk and a spoonful of sugar.

Emma lifted her head and gazed at Jens. She couldn’t help but smile. He was always there for her. She knew he loved her and that he always wanted to help.

Emma took her coffee from her right hand to her left and with her right hand she caressed Jen´s cheek.

“Maybe we could take a bath, order a pizza and watch some movies together. How does that sound?” Emma asked.

“Perfect. Can you read my mind?” Jens asked jokingly.

The clock went off. It was 7:00 am. They both looked at the clock and finished their coffee, It was time for the both of them to go to work.

Emma and Jens got into their cars and drove away from their cozy home. Both looking forward to the evening.

50 kilometers away stood a man in black in front of a lake. His hair was blond but greying. He was 43 years and the local priest. He had went for a walk to clear his mind. He loved the like especially early in the morning. The sun was beaming through the trees and there was a light mist coming from the ground. No one was around except for the few animals that ran through the grass enjoying their lives.

These spring mornings were the priest´s favorite time. He could walk around and be closer to nature and in his opinion closer to God. He though about his town, the people who resided in it and the world around them.

He enjoyed the peace and quiet that these small towns provided. He lived in this small town for about ten years now and he knew almost everyone. Of course most of the people did not go to church but he knew most of the people through the small festivities that were held in the town.

He grew to like the people here, sure there was always the gossip, an affair or two but that was it. Most of these people were normal. Well normal in the sense they went to work, spent time with there friends and family and lived their lives.

He looked at his watch. It was almost 7:00 in the morning. He decided it was time to end his walk and head back to town. He wanted to prepare for the day. A wedding was on the list for the day around 2:00pm. He loved weddings, people where always happy to be there. It was a happy celebration something he looked forward to.

It was the evening. Emma and Jens just finished their bath and ordered their pizza.

They were both on the couch. Jens was looking for their first film and Emma was looking at her phone.

The door-bell rang, the pizza was finally there. Emma stood up in her  dark red dress that she wore when she was home, walked to her purse took out money and headed toward the door. A few moments later she arrived with the delisous smelling pizza. The smell of cheese, sauce and delisouness filled the air.

Jens sat up, he had just found an old horror movie for them to watch. The only things that were missing were pizza in his stomach, his cat and Emma at his side.

Just as the though of his cat crossed his mind the little fluff ball jumped out from under the couch. He too awaited for everyone to be gathered at the couch. The cat was from Jens. He adopted his little furry friend about five years ago. He always liked animals. But with his little fuzzy baby it was love at first sight, just like with Emma. The cat was a black tabby. Anyone could see that this cat was well loved. The fur was fluffy and shiny. The reason for the fluffiness was not only due to the elegant black fur but also due to the roundness of his body. This was a well-fed happy cat. His name is Sam.  He was named after a fictional character who Jens loved. A character that was kind, loving, hard working and without him the world would have ended. Yes a volcano was involved in this characters story.

Sam placed himself between Emma and Jens. The purfict place. He would be pet from both sides. Sam is very strategic when it comes to getting pet. He has and always will find the best spot where he knows no one can resist his cuteness.

Jens looked at Emma and at Sam. This was all that he ever wanted. At this moment he knew that he was going to ask Emma to marry him. The question was when and how.

The evening went into night and the pair went to bed.

It was 3:00 am. Jens woke up from the snaring and hissing coming from the bed. It was Sam. Jens popped up with full gusto. Something was very wrong. Sam has never hissed before, at least Jens has never heard him do that. He turned next to him and Emma was gone.

Her side of the bed was cold. That means she had not been in bed for a while. He jumped up, carefully as to not get to close to Sam who still was very agitated. He walked to the light switch and turned on the light. He made his way towards the living room. Maybe Emma went to lay on the couch. She did that when she couldn’t sleep. She would watch TV and fall asleep on the couch.

As he approached  the living room the room was dark and the couch empty. He checked the kitchen, She was no where to be found. Adrenaline and fear began to course through his veins. Where could she be at 3:00 am. He grabbed a flashlight from the kitchen and walked towards the back door. As he approached the door he noticed that it was slightly opened.

He was at the door. And that is when he saw her. She was in the same shorts and Tshirt that she went to bed in. She had no shoes on and she was standing in the middle of the garden, in the dark and she was staring into nothingness. This adrenaline rush began to end. He noticed that it was freezing. <he ran up to Emma and tried to wake her. As he touched her shoulder it seemed that she had been startled awake. She was shaking. She looked at him and began to cry.

He took her into his arms, picked her up and took her to the house. The entire time she just cried. Jens took her to the bathroom where she then proceeded to shower. She was ice cold and her feet were covered in mud.

After her shower Emma went to her side of the bed and layed down. Jens looked at her, he did not know what to say. He felt worry, fear, concern and also relief to see that she was back in bed. At least she was safe for now.

Emma turned to him, pulling the covers to the side. “ Jens, there is something wrong with me. I`m scared.”

He tried to look at her but it was dark. But he could see her laying there. “Don’t worry. Its stress. You haven’t done this before so maybe this was just a one-time thing? If you want, we can call a doctor.”

“ Your wrong. This was not the first time.” Her voice was cold.

“what do you mean this was not the first time?” He replied.

“This has happened to me before. A few weeks ago. And it has happened again. This was the third time this month.” She said quietly.

Shocked and even more worried than before Jens responded, “why didn’t you say anything? You could have gotten hurt.”

Emma turned she was now facing away from him. She was quiet.

“I didn’t want you to worry. Its nothing.” She said to the wall.

He didn’t understand why she didn’t tell him. It is not normal to just suddenly start sleep walking. 

“Please, look at me.” He said. Emma laid there for a moment. After what felt like forever she turned to him.

“Emma. Don’t worry. We will figure it out. We will call a doctor. And we will get through this together. Please don’t hide things like this. You know I love you and I will always be there when you need me. We will figure this out together.” Jen´s words lingered in the night air.

Emma began to cry. Jens wrapped his arms around her and they both drifted into a deep sleep.

It was morning. Jens was in the kitchen. It was 9:00am, on a Saturday. Emma was still sleeping. Jens was looking online for doctors who specialized in sleep disorders. He spent the last hour looking at sites talking about sleep walking, sleep disorders and so on. There were so many things out there. His head began to hurt. He grabbed his coffee and took a sip. It was cold. He got up and walked towards to coffee machine.

This is when Emma walked in. She looked just as tired as the day before.

“Good morning, would you like a coffee?” asked Jens. He turned the coffee machine on and started to make two coffees. He knew what her answer was going to be. She always had coffee once she woke up.

“Yes, please.” She replied tiredly. Her voice was corse but she smiled.

“Are you feeling any better? Where you able to sleep?” He said as he handed her a cup of coffee. As he poured milk into his own cup she said, “Yes I actually did sleep. This coffee is great. Sun is up. Outside looks great lets do something today.”

[mlobsters]

supernatural s10e11 there's no place like home (w. robbie thompson)

shaky over the shoulder pov cam thing in the opening giving me evil dead/army of darkness vibes. campy

SAM You made egg-white omelettes? DEAN Yeah. Breakfast of Champions -- you know, if you're a dork like you.

i got nothing against egg white omelets but gotta admit they are so anemic looking that i prefer egg beaters if i'm goin that route, gimme some yellow colored egg whites :p

SAM And you slept past 7:00. DEAN Yeah, well, until we get answers on this Mark of Cain, I am on a 12-step program not to backslide. SAM 12 steps? DEAN Yeah. Hey, if Cain found a way to live with it after going dark side, then I just got to find a way to keep it in check, so haven't had a drink in a week, eight hours of rack time every night, and . . . now this masterpiece.

taking notes so he has a healthy relationship with alcohol, went cold turkey for a week and he's fine!

DEAN It's crap. Ugh. God. Soon as we get rid of this demonic tramp stamp, I am back on the booze, burgers, and . . . more booze. Tell me you got something.

totally fine!

DEAN What are you saying, Charlie tortured someone? SAM Uh . . . DEAN Our Charlie? Yea high, wouldn't hurt a Hobbit, practically sparkles?

she's just taking on the adopted family business of torturing 🤪

the score here also had this kind of thing in the previous episode, this percussion that slowly accelerates like a heart beat and it's kind of stressful. but when i was a kid, there was something in a show or movie or hell an ad, i don't know, that had this heart beat sound that freaked me the fuck out and i associated hearing a thumpy heart beat with getting increasingly anxious. lol. but, this is a single thump, not an actual heartbeat thump, so that's good at least :P

very pretty shot. ps, tell sam you're struggling with the stabby feelings

SAM (reading from the Charlie’s file) "Anti-authority disorder, clinical depression, violent outbursts." Charlie was, uh . . . DEAN Dude. If a shrink interviewed us at that age, you think the report would be all kittens and rainbows? Come on. She's a good kid. There's got to be an explanation for this, man. There's just got to be.

dean making the excellent points. also kinda violating her privacy but needs must, right? -_-

possessed/soulless/evil twin? i'm reading my summary of s9e4 and like, i barely remember any of oz-related stuff (i didnt write much about it either so that's probably why)

CHARLIE Oh, Sam, you're adorable. You're not gonna hurt me. In fact, that's your problem -- all good-guy code, no bite. What a waste. And you . . . (turning to Dean) Always letting this albatross hold you back. DEAN Okay, all right, you know what? I don't know what's going on here, okay? But this -- this is not you.

--

GOOD CHARLIE She's trying to win me back. Dark Charlie won the war single-handedly. But... She did some truly awful things. But I told her I didn't want any part of her near me again, ever. Going after the person who mur-- mur-- uh...Who took my parents away is her messed-up way of showing me how close we are, or -- or could be. I keep calling her "she," but she's me. I'm the one doing this. DEAN Charlie, that -- that's not who you are, okay? It's -- it's a twisted version of -- GOOD CHARLIE Me.

gee, sounds so familiar! support group for being soulless/darkside embodied/mark of cain

this whole oz/dorothy/charlie plot wasn't good the first time around and really did not need revisiting 😔

this dude again! did a hiky for him in the episode he was in back in s2 (probably my least favorite episode, tall tales)

riverdale - barclay hope as clifford blossom / the killing - barclay hope as michael ames / spn s2e15

brief sidebar about how dumb it is that food is assigned a moral value. he's trying to be extra Good which means eating a bunch of stuff he doesn't like. he can go back to being Bad and eating tasty food later. fatphobia never takes a day off

this sterile "swanky" waiting room with the terrible muzak is giving me hives

a) the last thing dean needs is dark charlie encouraging him to be dark b) he got tricked by dark charlie twice in a row and she stole his car? sheesh, man. off your game

great, now dean gets to feel guilty about beating the shit out of charlie

CHARLIE Yeah, well, there's one thing that you have that he didn't. You're a Winchester. I forgive you, Dean. DEAN Yeah, well, I don't. CHARLIE I know. Kind of your move. How's that working out for you, huh?

tell him, charlie

<3

SAM She's right, Dean. You can do this. We can do this. DEAN Then let's get to work.

yes we can

i'm glad they keep bringing back charlie, i've really come to love her and the dynamic she has with them. but i wish they'd given her less nonsense plotlines

the amount of redhead recurring characters past couple seasons is pretty funny. it's like riverdale, overrun

[timeoverload]

Today wasn't too bad I suppose. It didn't start very well because I slept through all 20 of my alarms. It's kind of ridiculous that I have to set that many as it is but I have a bad habit of hitting the snooze button. I usually get up around 4:30 or 5 but today I didn't get up until 6:15 and that's when I normally have to leave on Wednesdays.

I stayed up way too late last night but I wouldn't have been able to sleep even if I had tried because it was too loud. The neighbors down the street were lighting off super loud fireworks until almost 1 in the morning. I was so pissed and I really wanted to go over there and tell them they were being rude but I'm not a confrontational person. I don't even remember falling asleep but I don't think I got more than 4 hours. I guess having 2 days off messed me up too and I also forgot I had to be there earlier. I work at 7 on Mondays and Tuesdays and 6:30 on Wednesdays and Thursdays.

Luckily I still had time to get everything set up and get breakfast before cases started at 7:30. I had 24 today but I got done with them by 3:00. I had time to sit down and eat my lunch too. It definitely was better than last Wednesday. I had 31 cases that day due to add-ons and there was also an hour delay because one of the surgeries took longer than usual so I ended up having to stay late and I was already exhausted. I was so grumpy after that and Thursday sucked.

I also got mad last week because that creepy guy I work with that won't leave me alone tried hitting on me again in front of a bunch of people and I basically had to tell had to tell him to fuck off. It was embarrassing. After that incident, he left the department for a while and when he came back he was clearly in a bad mood and was banging stuff around. It felt like he was trying to be intimidating or something and he also kept trying to find reasons to talk to me. I told him previously that I thought it was weird that he kept calling me beautiful and amazing and I tried to make it clear that it made me uncomfortable. I haven't shown any interest whatsoever so I don't understand why he keeps trying. I don't trust him. He doesn't seem to show a lot of respect for women. He's very desperate for a relationship and I'm not the only girl he acts that way towards. He cornered another girl in the stairwell to get her phone number. I'm not sure why she gave it to him since she said that she doesn't like him either. I would never give him any of my information. Most of the girls are uneasy around him and he likes to go around trying to get hugs. If he tries to say or do anything else to me like that I'm going to HR. He says he's planning on working there a long time and I can't wait to get away from him. At least I don't have to see him at all this week since he's out of town. I don't want him to come back but I'm happy that I haven't had to see him since he did that.

I got to leave work a couple minutes early so that was nice. I went to the store to get cat food and more snacks for myself. I have been eating so much junk food. I think I have actually gained a couple pounds which is good news. Some of my clothes are fitting better. I hope I can continue gaining weight but I also need to eat a little healthier sometimes. I don't even know how much I weigh right now since I don't have a scale so I guess I will find out when I go to the doctor on Friday. I'm also still planning on asking for her to increase my dosage of lamotrigine to 175mg a day since I've been taking 150mg for a while now. I am going to see if she will give me ativan or something for my anxiety. I have taken anxiety meds before and I don't really like them but lately I'm having a really hard time managing it. I haven't had blood work done in a while so I should probably ask to have that done too.

I'm going to make some dinner soon and get ready for bed. I'm sure I will sleep a lot better tonight and hopefully I actually wake up on time in the morning. I'm glad I only have to work one more day this week and tomorrow shouldn't be too busy. I'm going to do my best to make it a good day.

[mediadiscord]

The Last of Us – Season 1 Episode 7 – Recap and Review

Hey everyone welcome back to my recap and review of another episode of The Last of Us. The show which I'm liking, based on a video game I've never played on a system that that I didn't continue playing after the second generation. As per usual this review will not feature any Easter eggs, because frankly I wouldn't know what one would be if I came across one. This episode really hit me in a nostalgic spot and not just because of where most of the episode takes place. This actually has some amazing music that tells the story that hasn’t been told yet. I might actually get this out on a Sunday night so let’s quit the crap, throw on The Cure and get to the recap and my review/thoughts. Ok, full transparency, I’m currently listening to The Cure’s Staring at the Sea: The Singles 1975 – 1985. The episode picks up right where the last one left off give or take probably an hour or two. Ellie has taken Joel and their horse to someone’s house where the horse is just hanging out while Ellie is tending to Joel who is bleeding out. Joel tells Ellie to go North back to his brother and he’ll take care of her to which Ellie says no. Eventually Ellie gets up and walks towards the door and is about to leave and then has a flashback. Before I get to the flashback, let’s play memory and think back to when Ellie told Joel that everyone she was close to in her life has either left or died. Ok, let that sit in your head as we go through this episode. Ellie is in what looks to be a gymnasium with other people dressed in sweatpants and sweatshirts with trainee on the back. You learn that this is the ROTC for FEDRA and they are training future soldiers. Ellie is listening to what I think is Pearl Jam in a Walkman and a girl knocks it off and tells her to hurry up. Ellie steps up and the girl, who is named Bethany, reminds her that she doesn’t fight but her friend does and she’s not there anymore. Well, if you were looking for a button to push that was the mother of all buttons. We cut to Ellie sitting in an office waiting for what seems to be the principal or guidance counselor of where she is. There’s a brief chat that pretty much paints out Ellie to be really smart but also too smart for her own good. She is promised this life of an officer in her future where she will live it up and not have to do any grunt work. Ellie believes what she’s been told and when it comes down to the what pathway she wants to choose for how her life turns out, she chooses the life of an officer. We then cut to Ellie’s room where we get some throwbacks to past episodes. She is reading the comic she had mentioned to Sam that was she was a collector of. We also see a Mortal Kombat 2 poster on the wall and this harkens back to when Joel and Ellie went to get Joels stash at the market and she gets excited to see a Mortal Kombat 2 arcade cabinet. Ellie looks over at an empty bed in her room and gets frustrated and goes to sleep. A little after 1:00 AM Ellie window opens and a mysterious figure comes in and we soon find out it’s Riley. Riley is her roommate, and she has been gone for 3 weeks, but it’s because she joined the fireflies. This doesn’t sit well with Ellie as her being an office will make Riley her enemy. We learn later that FEDRA recruits are taught to hunt the fireflies. Riley promises that she wants to give Ellie an amazing night and Ellie reluctantly agrees. There is some small backstory about Riley being recruited by the fireflies for her stealth skills and they soon end up at the location where Riley has an amazing night in store for Ellie. Apparently the The Mall was closed down due to infected, but it’s open and when FEDRA rerouted the power they turned on all the power to The Mall. The two make their way in and Riley activated the lights so Ellie can experience The Mall. This is the first big part of nostalgia for me as The Mall was a place that I would frequent all the time when I was younger and for mostly all the same reasons that Riley wanted to have Ellie experience. Riley tells Ellie that she has four wonders of The Mall that she would like to have her enjoy. There’s an extra one added as Ellie is mesmerized by the escalator. The first is an indoor carousel that breaks down during their ride, because those always break down. The second is a fully working arcade with a Mortal Kombat 2 arcade cabinet. Riley has already taken the pleasure of opening the quarter machine and so they spend some time playing. While Riley and Ellie are having fun in what they think is an abandoned mall, an infected hears them and begins to wake up. The third thing she wanted to show Ellie was where she was living/stationed by the fireflies and also gives Ellie a book. It’s the pun books that she has tormented Joel with during their journey. Ellie explores where Riley has been living and find pipe bombs that she has made. Riley explains that they are going to be used on areas where there are no civilians and she would never let anything happen to Ellie. Ellie questions why Riley really brought her there and it comes out that Riley is being transferred to a different quarantine zone in another state and this was her last night. She tells Ellie she wanted to see her and say good-bye, so Ellie tells her she told her and she leaves. As Elie is almost out she has a change of heart and then hears a scream and runs back to where she thinks Riley has been screaming. It turns out the fourth thing she wanted to show Ellie was a Halloween themed store. They hash things out and put on masks and dance on the counter. Ellie stops dancing and takes off her mask and tells Riley not to leave. Riley agrees and then Ellie kisses her. The feelings Ellie has been hiding, but the audience has noticed, finally come out and they are reciprocated. Riley seems to be onboard with this feeling and then an infected decides to join the fun. There’s a skirmish and Ellie kills it with her knife, but the mood goes from happy that they are alive to sad as they both realize they are bitten. At this point Ellie doesn’t know she can’t be infected, but we now see where she got that scar on her arm. Riley is bit on the hand and we know that she’ll be dead in a day or two so they contemplate what they’re going to do. They speak of suicide but Riley says she doesn’t like that and that they should just continue on until the end. Ellie agrees and then it cuts back to her in the house with Joel. Ellie runs to the bathroom and gets some material. She runs to Joel and starts to stitch him up and that’s where the episode ends. As I mentioned before this episode has a ton of nostalgia for me. The soundtrack was all 80’s, which we know in the series is a queue for a bad situation. The song that means most and that’s hidden in a midi format is The Cure’s Friday I’m in Love. This plays, I think, while they are on the carousel. This is a direct reflection of Ellie and her feelings towards Riley. She doesn’t know how to express that she likes Riley as she doesn’t know if Riley feels the same way. Ellie does have second thoughts about what she is wearing when Riley mentions that she’s trying to imagine Ellie in a thong from Victoria’s Secret. The final thing that Ellie seems to take to heart, and the camera kept cutting to it, was when Riley held Ellie’s hand and walked her towards the arcade. Let’s go ahead and get nostalgic for a moment and remember when arcades were a thing. That scene when they were standing in front of that arcade brought back so many memories for me. Let’s also talk about Ellie’s thoughts on material items. When Riley is telling her about The Mall and how people looted it for things they needed, she made a remark about people needing shoes. To me this was her not knowing the need for fancy things, just look at the 80’s Walkman she was using to listen to her music. This evolves her character as she doesn’t know what fashion really is, she was raised in a time where people just wore whatever they could get their hands on. In the last episode we see that bartering isn’t for what looks good, but for what fits. This episode was really great, and I enjoyed it immensely. This probably has to be one of my favorite episodes so far in this series. Read the full article

[thephantomgirl11]

So I'm going to tell y'all a story that's a little weird in my opinion... It's about something strange that happened to me back in I think 2015 when I tried to go to bed... First I'm going to show you an image, but not just any image. This is a scan I found online from a book I used to own. (I didn't throw it away, someone stole it from me ☹️) It's a page from "The Complete Sonic Comics Encyclopedia" by Archie Comics. Here's the page:

Nothing wrong with this page right? Well you're right! But, this exact page has to do with the weird thing that happened. Here's a little bit of backstory that kinda contributes to what happened. In 2015 I got pretty sick, my stomach didn't really agree with me for quite a few years. It all started during the day after Easter. So it was an issue I had to watch for every day and make sure I ate enough and take my pills so it didn't worsen. A few months into 2015, I bought this book because I'm a big fan of the Archie/Sonic comics and I wanted something to distract me from my health issue. I read it the second I bought it (which was around maybe 5:00 pm to 7:00 pm when I got it.) Of course my stomach was pretty upset when I got it, so it took me a little longer than normal to read it. I got around to this page, and then I got ready for bed. I figured I'd just finish the rest of it in the morning.

So, I went to lay down, I closed my eyes and tried to sleep, yes, my stomach did slow down on hurting at the moment, so it should have been easier for me to sleep. But, for some odd reason, one of the characters that's seen on that page, started just popping up in my mind... Like, literally the second I closed my eyes, that specific character, in their same pose as what was in the book, as well as their name, started racing through my head and somehow made it hard for me to sleep! Like, have you ever done something or had something on your mind that has ever made it hard to sleep? Like maybe had a really embarrassing day at school? Or something something similar, that just makes it hard to sleep? Well that was what happened.

Now, it's not the first time I've heard about this character, I've read about them on the Sonic fandom page, so I was well aware of them, so I don't know why It'd run through my mind like a 5 year old being shown a horror movie. Wanna know who the character is? Can you guess?

I'll give you a second...

Well... If you guessed this guy, you are absolutely correct!

That's right, Downtown was literally the character my mind decided to spam me with! I don't even understand how or why this character would give me trouble sleeping that night. Like I said, I already knew all about him, he's not really a "traumatizing" character other than being a crooked mob boss. Basically, when I closed my eyes I'd see his image and here "Downtown Ebony Hare" over and over again. And me having trouble sleeping, would result in triggering my stomach aches, which was something I didn't want to deal with. Which, that unfortunately did happen around 3:00 am. So, I then had to read a slice of bread to make it stop a bit (I had to eat small items constantly to stop the pain back then.) But, when I tried to sleep, it happened again! "Downtown Ebony Hare," over and over again until I finally fell asleep at 5:00 fucking am!

That was literally the only time that's happened in my life. I don't understand why it happened. I wasn't upset about anything, I was actually very calm but also pretty happy I got that book. I felt like my mind was trying to torture me for some odd reason with a one shot character that isn't very threatening. I'd understand if it was a character like, I don't know, Leatherface or something like that. But this character is just a dr*g dealing mob boss from a Sonic comic...

The reason I'm talking about this, is actually because my older sister experienced this phenomenon recently, and asked me about my experience. It wasn't the same character for her, but she still experienced it. She wanted to know what fully happened since I told her a brief summary of it back in 2015. And since it happened her, she wanted to know if it was similar to what she had happen.

Now, my question is, has anyone else have a weird incident like this? What do you think really caused it? Is it something common? Is there a rational explanation for it? Or is it something unheard of? I just know that this incident has made me annoyed with this character lol. Like I didn't really like the character before all that, nor did I hate the character. I actually wanted to see him in more recent comics, but now I'm not so sure about that anymore. I of course, will draw some fan art of him later on, as I feel like he doesn't have really any of him. I'm just gonna make sure I finish it before it hits nightfall. Anyway, that's all I have for now. Hope this was entertaining in some kind of way.

[threadmonster]

I just want everyone to know that it's the year 2022 and I'm a grown adult that is not by any means the person I was in middle school. Tomorrow I am choosing petty chaos because I refuse to be bullied. Will update.