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opal-owl-flight · 3 hours

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TIRED OF WAITIN’ MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND

YEAH ITS ALRIGHT, WE BOTH KNOW THAT YOU WANT IT, DONT YOU BE SO SHY, SHY!

OH MY GOD I LOVE STARKILLER WIDNEKD. I had this idea for Tartar manipulating 3 with words similar to the song…

more abt that below + the piece without the words :]

I wonder if 3, at that point in OE, carry a thought within them... something Tartar can use.

The sanitization is absolute mind control, yes, but it would be neat if it was preceded by a sort of hypnosis; a suggestion that tartar puts out for a victim to bite onto (not that it really matters. The forced body control happens anyway.)

Theres a yearning for the past. That much I know. But I do wonder if Tartar also suggested something else alongside that.

"Ah, the legendary captain of the Squidbeak Splatoon. He probably was the one who pulled you out of that life, hm?"

"...Yes."

"Despicable, this old coot, forcing you to fight a war that ended a century ago. Forcing you to dig up a city your nation already buried.

Making you a weapon in this...disgusting show of continued dominance."

"..."

"Dont you want to end him, right here, right now?"

"...."

"Avenge that younger self, child. Join me, and we will make sure he never hurts you again."

"..."

They look at Cuttlefish. Cod, theyre so weak, their head hurts, they are in no shape to defend themself. Neither is the old man, but...

Their hearts were burning with a feeling theyve been burying for years. A feeling thats gotten stronger and stronger over the long patrol.

This...doubt. Towards the captain they followed the ends of the earth for. Day by day, being pushed to their limits for his continued war. Wanting his approval, wanting to make him proud. Believing that theyre indeed keeping this fragile world safe.

Wanting to...keep being this hero he said they were.

But its getting harder to believe those words now. Not when that Octarian from earlier was such a sweet soul...among others theyve encountered and observed in other patrols.

Their arm burned. It was drenched in that cyan ink the telephone was oozing.

They have no reason to trust this thing that almost killed Cuttlefish and that Octarian that he was with moments before.

Still...

They feel...

Their mind is slipping.

So tired...so hurt...

"Join me. I can give you rest.

Ill bring you...to the promised land."

"...Okay."

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They went fully unconscious for awhile. When they "awoke" (but is still under Tartar's control), they were already fighting 8. And their body hurt even more than before.

They never shouldve trusted him.....

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This baiting rings familiar, doesnt it. Order did it to 4, as well. Much to 3s horror, they were the reason she took that bait. Her desire to be their perfect agent, and their desire to never be hurt or used by anyone like Cuttlefish again...

They wanted her to be strong enough so she can stay safe and live her life the way she wanted to. But their fear spoke louder than their adoration for her.

Hurt people hurt people, cycle of violence, and all that.

#splatoon #splatoon fanart #splatoon octo expansion #agent 3 #sanitized agent 3 #opal owl’s nest #GOD I LOVE THIS ENTIRE THING 3 HAS WITH CUTTLEFISH. FUCKING HELL

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yanderespamton78 · 4 months

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what i find kinda funny most artists will say "oh, ive loved art since i was a toddler, ive always been very passionate about it and it was/is my dream to become an artist" whereas I literally have a date that is The Day I Got Into Art like i hated art with a burning passion until 12th Sept 2022 when i just decided "welp. im an artist now." and ive loved art ever since

#the reason why i got into art is bc i saw a tut for drawing bodies and i used it and i drew smth i was actually happy with #i still have the drawing somewhere #it was actually pretty decent #i used to just have random days where i would be into art for about 5 hours then id try draw smth the next day and itd look bad then id #give up #but after making that drawing even tho i couldnt replicate the skill level the next day i stayed determined and bought a sketchbook #and i practiced and practiced for like 4 months and got better at it :D #so proud of my younger self for doing that

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averlym · 10 months

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fairest of the fair

#hi! im alive and back and etc.#six the musical #six the musical fanart #katherine howard #thinking of that post going 'i think eventually you become the person you needed most' and like maybe that's the thing with my art #this started out as a redraw and <improvement meme> i think i've finally reached the stage where i'm making the things that my younger self #aspired to create. like i can do this now! i've reached That level of technical skill! tiny me would be so proud. it's very gratifying #redraw from august this year actually. i've made a surprising amount of improvement HAHA maybe it was the adamandi stuff getting me #back into digital rendering. i think that obsession has quietly slipped away but yknow. one never truly leaves a fandom. just less intensit #also speaking of old fandoms! we're back with the six stuff haha. as of writing i'm in the midst of blog revamp- figuring out how to chill #multifandom status doesn't mean ditch all the old stuff ! but i do feel much freer and less stressed. i think hiatus has been good for me #notes on this piece particularly: redraw about cutting hair and thinking of the lyric above. also lowkey &j ref + pinterest poem excerpts #of female suffering. and maybe a dash of amanda heng let's walk inspo. this work is really just full of contradictions..#1. the mirror and cutting hair as an act of self liberation 2. the & is part of the lyric but also a nod to &j (in another iteration it was #pink but the white looked better) and like. &j is really all !!! girl power!!! etc. and i was like hmmmm. also matching pink shiny aes #3. the frame as a cage; the mirror as a self reflection idea (ie. saville's propped insp) but also as a sign of vanity. 4. sparkly costume #and pretty pose- read one too many poems about women feeling like they have to be pretty even in their suffering. something i wanted to #explore. and also in 5. the show itself... all you wanna do is. despite all the dancing and pink and sparkly the content of the song is #darker. and even though it's a story of her suffering it's still presented as a shiny fun pop song and ajshdhfhfh ok... 6. the lyrics fall #outside the frame. sort of a caught inbetween. sort of a trapped in the narrative and yet #within the frame it's all. vaguely handwavy breaking free vibes. like i said contradictions?#7. cutting off the long ponytail vs the pull my hair lyric at the end. yeah #8. the blocked off & looks a bit like scissors. positioned to cut right at the neck #anyways yeah irl remains hectic! but if i get around to more doodles they'll appear here :)

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dylanlila · 4 months

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I AM SMART!!!!! i am very smart, i am done with bringing myself down I AM A SMART PERSON... and i am ESPECIALLY smart for medicine.

#i was born to do this i literally just had a mini breakdown but to have so many people look at me #and see that spark in me and for me NOT to see it i am fucking DONE #the only thing that could sabotage me here is my own self #and i am DONE DONE DONE. i am milessss ahead of my younger self in turns of confidence #because this school showed me that there is a place where people like me can belong #and i learned how to do every boring little human thing and i am sooo proud of myself for that #because that is more difficult to me than any exam i could possibly take #it's just. i am good. i am good. this is my place this is where i belong this is MY STAGE #and i am gonna pass these exams. and i am gonna have such tremendous fun doing that #okay. i couldn't breathe for a good while and now i am gonna get stupidly drunk. see you later #jo in the tardis*

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goldkirk · 8 months

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as I'm going back over my past history and items and journals and years, I come across all sorts of things, like the pencil I saved from that so-precious memory from second grade, and a pair of flip flops I've been missing for two years, and [checks notes] the modern-high-school-AU-kidnapped-by-a-serial-killer story I wrote in late high school jdfsjdfsjkjlksfd

#i can't wait to find out what red flags I didn't see in my own self back when I last read this thing in 2015 hfdhfdhjsfd #also. there's gonna be like a good sentence here and there and then CRINGE. the whole rest of everything is just me still trying to copy th #breathing pace (essentially) and ways-of-describing-things of mainstream authors like I thought I was supposed to #so this'll be somewhat painful but also god what a joy and a gift and an honor and a delight to get to hold this close to my heart #and witness it with understanding and empathy and slow reflection and care like my past younger self deserves #i'm so lucky i'm alive to be here and do this #i'm so grateful i'm headed towards welcoming back and embracing the last little girl i was that still felt a lot of things #so excited for her focus and precision and tenacity and constant curious joy and movement to be back someday #i'm afraid people won't like the me i was before rule after rule and then dangers #but my god it'll feel so good to be the fully-flowing energy machine and dance and conduit again how will I have enough bother to care?#people who are good to each others' nervous systems cumulatively feel better and better #if i'm not good for you and yours then you really truly SHOULD go elsewhere and find someone who makes YOUR self feel right and light + war #anyway now that i wrote an essay in the tags as usual [nervous laughter]#personal #add to journal #words n rhythm #WHY DID I FEEL CAPABLE OF UNDERTAKING A STORY LIKE THIS #cradling my past self gently but also BANGING my HEAD against the WALL lmao #i'm proud of myself for writing and sharing this and its creative ideas. even if i don't like it now or feel ashamed or see mistakes.#anything. it mattered that it came to me and it mattered that i explored it and it mattered that i poured myself through it to help shape i #and it mattered that I left it on the internet so that now it still exists. i'm going to honor this story no matter what current me would #objectively think about it if it was written by anyone else.#this is a gift i give myself now.#this is a lot of what I learn and learn to do #trauma evolution #mosswrites

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the-lark-ascending69 · 4 months

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I don't want to see Robin being a good queer mentor to Will. I want her to be so broken inside that all the advice she gives is 1) clearly her projecting 2) sardonically pesimistic and 3) simply bad, terrible advice. I want to see her rambling about her own traumas and end by telling Will the world sucks, that everyone hates you, there's no happy endings and the best thing you can do is crawl into a hole in the earth and cry.

Will feels slightly intimidating watching this weird girl have a mental breakdown in front of him, so he just says "I think I'm gonna go ask Steve"

#steve may be the token straight friend but whatever advice he gave dustin worked #so maybe he's onto something #robin buckley #will byers #the robin-will 'friendship' I want to see is Will as a reflection of Robin's younger self. still a little bit hopeful about love.#only for Robin to realize just how deeply broken she's become through the years as she talks to him and watches horror settle on his face #i think that's more interesting than just having her give him advice to get into mike's pants.#does robin look like the type to give good romantic advice?? does she?? she can't even fix her shit and she's supposed to fix will's #maybe they talk a year or two later after Robin finds herself again. and Will has grown and found his own path. and she tells him she's #happy for him. that he's doing well. that her old english teacher would be proud (will doesn't know who this ''mr. hauser'' is but he #doesn't bother to ask) and that he should hold onto his friends. they're important.#my posts

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weezerlvr228 · 22 days

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flippin boobahs!

#weezer #rivers cuomo #brian bell #patrick wilson #scott shriner #OKAH HI CHAT #i’ve been thinking #this tag will be just a rant not really weezer related #yk laufey ?#i was listening to her song ‘letter to my 13 year old self’ and just started overthinking about myself when i was younger #i just think about my younger self and get so sad thinking about her; i wish i could’ve done more for her #i was a huge introvert and talking to anybody made me super super anxious; so much so that my teacher noticed and had me join a ‘social #emotional learning’ group where we spoke about low self esteem and how to raise it and everything like that #i only left it in 8th grade because i didn’t wanna keep missing class for it; but it made me so sad to think i thought so low of myself #i would wear hoodies all the time and jeans because i used to hate my body a lot #which is awful to do in socal heat!#i think it started because in my family i was always stereotyped as the fat one; yk how mexican families are? they called me gordita for #the longest time; which made me incredibly insecure and only in 10th grade did i start showing my arms 😭 IK ITS DUMB BUT ITS SO WEIRD #i still can’t do it entirely; i’ll wear shrugs and things like that because i still am insecure about my arms sometimes but ive been better #i only really had one friend but she had a different lunch; so i was alone for most of the time on the swings by myself or sitting at the #lunch tables alone waiting for lunch to end and this noon duty came to me a lot and would talk to me since she felt bad i was always alone #while everybody else played with each other ; and i don’t know why i just broke down thinking about how lonely i was at the time #i’d go to the school’s friendship room everyday after that because it was just a teacher who let kids come inside her room to play games if #they didn’t wanna be in the heat and soon i became friends w the teacher and she’d play uno with me everyday; mainly because the room was #relatively empty until they got loom bands! and i was an expert on loom bracelets so i would help others make them and that was a confidenc #e boost; i remember being proud of myself for socializing like that LOL #i just get sad thinking about that time; i like to think that if little Lyss saw me; she would be so proud because i have friends;#a boyfriend ; good grades ; and i’m well liked and regarded. i hope she’s proud of my progress socially because it was such a leap #i wish i could go back in time and tell her how much better things get and how she won’t be lonely forever #…and to not online date. definetly don’t do that one.

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lionblaze03-2 · 4 months

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sometimes I think about writing and singing music not because I’m an incredible singer but because no one has my fucking voice, especially in popular music, and its disheartening to be born a girl, told you’ll only get girl roles or try to voice match other girls, or ‘sing with the girls’ and then only be able to match male voices because you’re a fuckin tenor and not anything higher. I can’t think of any girl Broadway roles I can hit all the notes on. Most songs I love I have to pitch down for myself or use falsetto for singing along to. It bothers me a lot less now because I’m an adult who’s more secure in myself but as a teen in kids musical theatre it FUCKED with me, BAD style. And I know for a fact that even now when I hear people with a voice like mine singing I get excited and immediately invested in their work because they’re like ME, finally, for once. A brother in this world of being afab and having the voice of a recently pubescent boy forever. Maybe I should be that brother too.

#Using randomly gendered words because that’s me now but hey #Regardless of if you were born afab and are a girl 100% or if you were born afab and are someone else #It STILL sucks to always be grouped along with ‘girls’ just because of your voice and realize #You CANT hit that. You can’t hit the mark for ‘girl’. You’ll never achieve that without like. Hrt #Just say THE VOCAL CLASS. Like. Sopranos sing with this. Tenors with this. Bass with this. Etc #Then it doesn’t hurt! But nooo instead they’re looking or ‘sing with the other girls’ and you fucking can’t #And it gives you a crisis at age 14 #Anyway all I know is when other people who were assigned female at birth and aren’t on something they changes ones voice #and just happen to have born with the same deep ass voice as me. It makes me proud to hear them use it #Because not enough people do. It’s like we’re all collectively embarrassed or something #I see so many sad posts from teenagers posting their dream roles and the reason they won’t get it is ‘girl’#and it’s like. I remember being that kid. Never able to get a female lead because of my voice. Never able to get a male lead because of gir #Even though my voice and appearance could easily swing male. Nope! You’re GIRL. So you’re doomed to background forever :)#I got 1 lead role and it was when I was at my most feminine and was also for a villain that was a fat hag #I LOOOOVED playing her im aunt sponge forever. BUT. Never getting one again after that… showed me. Something #More gender blind casting and more songs just written for tenors please #doing just ONE of those things would probably solve the issue #But both please because I’m greedy and I want what I couldn’t have for every kid today #(And also me in the future in adult community theatre. Haven’t had time/too intimidated so far but I WILL go back)#And before anyone questions the language on this post. I STRUGGLED with how to word it #TERFs begone. I love trans people. I am nonbinary and some form of intersex (pcos).#I just word it this way because of like. Where we all start #Whether we stay GIRL girls or realize we’re somewhere in between. It crushes us either way to have the ‘wrong’ voice to do anything #Because it did me at first. And I’m otherwise GLAD to be confusing #I’ve come to love my deep voice it baffles others and they never know what to call me it really helps the whole ‘what am I’ presentation #But. In terms of certain things. Like being in theatre in the deep south #It certainly does not help and can be disheartening #Especially back when I was younger and more self conscious #lion’s lair

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toastsnaffler · 2 months

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love being at the climbing gym like yeah im not that flexible and then constantly doing moves matching my hands n feet on the same holds even when completely unnecessary

#half the pictures ppl take of me i have one leg straight and the other at my shoulder height. okay yeah #just looking thru ones ppl have taken recently of me again.. we love being vain n self obsessed #cant wait to get back there on monday i have so many projects rotating in my mind. im always thinking abt them while im at work #.diaries #i flashed a v4 yesterday that was a kind of manoeuvring all your hands and feet onto the same hold and standing type deal #and it felt rly natural to me n then no one else could do it n i felt bad for calling it easy for a v4 i just forgot i can Bend 💀#its mainly only bc im a little younger than some other ppl. and a bit lighter too... and doing years of resistance training has given me #more range of motion than ppl who have histories of different exercise styles/sports #there are ppl who are way more flexible than me ofc but some of them in the group dont have as much core or power.. different stats innit #i figured out a start to another v4 that i was rly proud of too.. just need to get the rest of it next week #but again no one else could even start it my way which was frustrating bc my fave thing is getting to share smth i figured out w someone #so we can joint problem solve the whole thing n both send it... anyway i think its still useful but theyd have to start on the other side #and go up a little in order to come down into the position i had. since its a weird one to get into from the ground bc ur legs are folded #mmmmm....#im so tired i meant to do so much when i got home from work but zzzzzzz #oh welllllll.. itll be a fun weekend hehe going to visit a friend for a few days <3

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the-trans-dragon · 10 months

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The longer I am alive, the more my brain replays that scene in Lilo and Stitch where the scientist is watching Stitch fret around at night, and the scientist says something like, "poor thing, doesn't even have fond memories to keep it warm at night" or something

As a kid, I didn't realize how comforting memories could be, and I rarely had the luxury to create them.

I am glad I survived. It would have been easier, with fond memories to comfort me during painful times. I have many now, though, and they are indeed good company.

#i wish id sat in more trees and watched more falling stars and snuck out to watch the first colors of sunrise over the river more often.#i wished id understood how to make friends. i wish i could have been vulnerable enough to make friends. i wish surviving hadnt been a #constant struggle. it is what it is. sometimes when i was a kid id wonder if my future self would have more love for me. id ache for it to #be true--for someone to know me and still love me. and i love that younger version of myself so much. they did so good. it all hurt so #terribly but they did so good anyways. i am very proud of them for fighting through the bad things so i could find unimaginable happiness.#like life is still really hard but like...idk. i never knew id ever have a comforting friendship. i never knew someone would love all of me #its so precious to me--to exist here and now with a wife and a partner and a cat. to cherish my body and view it as a ally rather than a #nemesis and failure. this has been a big year for Learning To Be Gentle With Myself and ive found such a quiet restfulness. its peaceful in #my brain when all of the terror settles down and allows softness and quietness and gentleness to exist in my brain.#sorenhoots #and i have memories that are so warm now. they grow like a struggling garden but they grow. someday theyll grow like weeds i hope. ill do my #best to keep planting them.

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shanti-ashant-hai · 3 months

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#found a letter i wrote to my “18 year old self” when i was 10 #god 10 year old me was so full of life #so ready to do things #she was obsessed with getting her way and working for it #now someone tells me to do hard work and i just. stop breathing #and ive fulfilled little me's wish of getting into BHU and still being friends with my childhood friends #but the last line. the last fucking line.#“its ok if you dont do any of that as long as you are happy and mumma and papa love you and are proud of you”#WHAT IF I CRIED #happy? mumma proud of me? what are those but little whims #mere fantasies that can never be fulfilled #10 year old shanti wished for something and did everything in her power to achieve it #she knew she wasnt talented and said “ok then hardwork it is”#19 year old shanti is tired. exhausted. done.#i know im not talented and i'll only get my way through hardwork. and i dont. fucking. want to.#is it even worth it?#im not even as happy as i thought id be #i want to be 10 #i want to run around with scraped knees #to drink glucon-D and laugh with my friends about fart jokes #i want to reverse time #i want my mother to look at me with love #i want her to stroke my hair and feed me my favourite meal and tell me its ok if im mediocre #10 year old me had her fucking shit together and didnt know it #“i love you older me. you're amazing”#thank you younger me. i hope you. atleast. are proud of me.#shanti ki ashanti suno

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shoechoe · 5 months

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I only lurked on the Internet for a long time and still do not post on most websites I visit but it really is nice to have a place where I can talk about things like animated shows and music and other assorted interests without being judged

#personal #i will go on and on and on about the things i like and IRL it makes people sick of me #especially because my friends when i was younger were mean about my interests #i remember one time (i was 13) i was hanging out w/ my friends and we were watching shows so i put on invader zim #and then in the middle they said ''turn it off this show is so stupid'' and the rest of the night they watched superstore #i had to uh... resist the urge to run and jump out the window the rest of the time #people including my parents would make fun of the music i liked since i was like 11 #it would get to the point where i would snatch my headphones out of people's hands and obsessively clear every tab so they wouldn't see it #i would also get made fun of because i was bad at drawing (by my own parents too) and was kind of awkward in general #it made me very self conscious about so many aspects of myself i really wasn't happy #i think i am only starting to get a little better about it #and i'll be honest i'm not innocent when it comes to making fun of people for harmless interests too. the behavior is contagious i think #i try not to do it now i'm not proud of it #not to be too incredibly vent-y. but i really like feeling more comfortable talking about things i enjoy somewhere #i have found more friends that have some similar interests to me now and old friends have apologized and gotten less harsh #which helps. but also posting paragraphs on the internet about random shit helps too

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heyybeach · 4 months

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Maybe I should've figured out I was a lesbian when I was playing "couples dares" in primary school and I was "dating" the boy I had fixated on for literal years of my life, and we were dared to kiss for 30 seconds and I immediately said no. Like maybe that was a telltale sign

#lesbian #times i should've known i was a lesbian #times i should've known i was gay #I remember being all in my head about it being my first kiss #and i regretted it afterwards cause i felt like i missed out on something crucial #but i stopped regretting it a long time ago #honestly I'm just proud of my younger self for not being pressured into doing something i didn't want to do and wasn't comfortable with #still haven't had my first kiss #still regret nothing #i actually tried to take it back afterwards and say i would kiss the boy #but this time he said no #so it was a good learning experience for us both in the end

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myfirstandlast · 8 months

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going through answered asks from when i was 18 wanting to hold myself so tightly