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her-satanic-wiles · 7 months

Text

October 15th

Noncon, Possessed!Swiss x Reader

Masterlist ⛧ Hellish Delights Masterlist

Words: 6.8k

Warnings: Noncon; extreme horror; dead dove: do not eat; explicit use of the word “rape” throughout; public masturbation; exhibitionism; possession; violence; demonic asphyxiation; victim blaming; face-slapping; sexual violence; rape; rape-kink; characters acknowledge that it’s rape; piv; vaginal sex; unprotected sex; pain; degradation; public sex; mind break; underprepared; dacrophilia; unconcious sex; multiple scenes; dubcon; fear play; breeding kink; cum eating; accidental filming via security camera; creampie;

The Ghouls aren't demons in my fic. They're humans who work in the Ministry but they're a different class of profession, somewhere between personal assistants and body guards depending on the importance of Papa's task.

Taglist: @sodoswitchimage @enchantedbunny @bitchywitchygardener @thew0man @sodomiser @the-did-i-ask @copias-sewer-rat @gehrmansbignaturals

🔞 MDNI 🔞

As this is dark fiction, I'm choosing to rate it 21+. Please respect my rating. Thank you.

**WARNING**

This is a work of fiction based in the extreme horror category and should be treated as such. I do not condone the actions the characters make, nor am I actively encouraging others to participate in such actions in everyday life. It also does not reflect the personalities of the performers who play these characters.

The purpose of this fic is to shock, scare, entertain, and make readers entirely uncomfortable. If you are not in a headspace where you can safely read and enjoy this story, or even if the trigger warnings make you uncomfortable, I highly recommend and encourage you not to read this. Your mental health is more important than a work of fiction.

If you are struggling to come to terms with past trauma, please talk to someone and seek professional help.

You deserve to feel safe, loved and cared for. Thank you.

Sometimes rituals went wrong. That was one of the things you learned when you first joined the Ministry. Rituals go wrong and not every demon is your friend. Of course, the more rituals one participated in determined the success of said ritual just down to the fact that experience was a key ingredient and so it was always recommended to bring someone who had experience to every single ritual just to be safe.

Papa Copia’s Ghouls were the more experienced ones in the Ministry, but more specifically Mountain, Rain, Swiss, and Dew. Yourself and Phantom were mere babes in comparison; sweet summer children who knew nothing of life and Satanism, only sex rituals on pentagrams give funny dreams and great orgasms. Because of this, you and Phantom walked into the ritual room with a bit of a pep in your steps, and no worries or concerns whatsoever - not concerning yourselves with seriousness or responsibility. This was just a regular, sex magick ritual surrounded by friends in order to contact the Olde One and get some advice is all. You had done this perfectly before, and you had no reason to think it wouldn’t happen again.

You, Rain and Mountain began lighting the candles in the room, ten of them to be precise. One for each of the pentagram’s corners, and a further five to outline the space in between. Dewdrop, the most experienced of everyone there, was in charge of drawing the pentagram from scratch. The first step was to scrub away the existing paint from a previous Sibling’s ritual.

“Why are we doing this?” Phantom asked as he wrung out the hot, soapy water from the sponge.

Dew sighed, “Did you not pay attention during training, Phantom?”

Swiss was now on his hands and knees next to Dew scrubbing at the red paint with a hard-bristled brush. “Clearly not. Look at those eyes: no thoughts just vibes.”

Phantom threw some of the soapy water at Swiss, in turn earning himself a middle finger. “I didn’t have time to study, remember? I was just thrown straight into life here after Aether…” Phantom trailed off, remembering how so many people in the room weren’t ready to talk about what happened. There was a brief silence while they all cast their minds back to their long lost friend.

“We clean off the old pentagram,” Dew said, clearly exasperated by his Satanic brothers, “because we don’t know what kind of ritual our Siblings performed before we got here. Cleaning the floor allows us to better control the safety of our ritual.”

“What could happen if we don’t clean up?” Phantom asked. “Moreover, what would happen if we just built upon these lines?”

“Oh come on, Phantom.” You said. “Even I know that.” Phantom got on his knees and began scrubbing away the paint on his third of the pentagram. “The cross energy between rituals and magic opens up a gateway for negative energy to come through. Sometimes that energy is just bad karma or bad luck, and you have one hell of a week.”

Swiss, “Literally.”

You continued, “Or it’s the souls of the damned coming through, or worse, demons.”

Phantom, “Has the Dark One ever travelled through these portals?”

Dew, “Probably. But He doesn’t do it often.”

“What I still don’t understand is why demons and damned souls would want to hurt us, we’re all on the same side, after all.”

Mountain, “Catholicism. You give energy to things you believe in, which in turn makes it more powerful, right?” Phantom nodded. “This is why Lucifer Himself wouldn’t come to harm us because we love and worship Him as a friend, a lover, a brother etc. But according to Catholicism, why does Hell exist?”

“To punish bad people after they die.”

“And what do we know happens to these bad people when they spend an eternity being tortured by demons?”

“They become demons themselves.”

“Good boy, have a Scooby snack.” Mountain threw a packet of mini-Oreos at Phantom, who caught it with one hand.

Rain, “Some of those bad people become demons, not all of them. The majority of demons are created by Lucifer as assistants to Him, and they’re usually picked from the petty criminals rather than genocidal maniacs and bigoted pricks. Like Mephistopheles, for example. He was just a businessman before he died. Think Ebenezer Scrooge, but in real life. Stole from the poor to put in his back pocket. In comparison to say, I don’t know, Stalin, he wasn’t too bad of a guy. If Mephistopheles showed up, we would have a great time sending him back. We’d just have to watch our wallets.”

Phantom, “And if it’s one of the dangerous ones, it would be catastrophic?”

Dew, “Absolutely. Papa and the Clergy would have to get involved. Papa would have to contact the Olde One directly to come and drag the beast away. Contacting the Olde One with the ritual that Papa would need could put Papa in mortal danger. So, we clean to save Papa as well as ourselves. So, make sure you get every spot, you hear me?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

That was the first mistake made that night: no one double checked before the paint went down that the previous paint had been cleaned completely. From eye-level, everything looked squeaky. But what none of you realised at the time was there were small, insignificant specs of paint left in Swiss’ third. Insignificant specs, but by no means safe.

The second mistake was that when the candles were being placed on the freshly painted pentagram, one of them wasn’t precisely sat atop one of the points. The candles usually acted as an extra barrier of protection, essentially trapping something inside the pentagram if it came through uninvited. Lower level demons or spirits could still be trapped if the candles weren’t precise, but the higher level ones wouldn’t be stopped.

The five Ghouls were there to conduct the ritual on Papa’s behalf, you were there to provide the energy to allow them to do so. This wasn’t your first ritual and so you had no problems at all getting completely naked in front of the five men you considered to be close friends, and sitting in the centre of the pentagram. You’d been part of these rituals before with them, if you hadn’t already had a few of them balls deep inside you on multiple occasions beforehand. And so when they had all joined hands, you had no shyness or reservations about spreading your legs and exposing yourself to them. This would be the third mistake.

Swiss wasn’t concentrating fully. If you’d have opened your eyes and looked at your friends holding hands around you as they chanted, you would have seen Swiss looking directly at you with his mouth open, watching as you touched yourself surrounded by men. You would have seen that he was concentrating on your hands toying with your clit more than chanting the Latin required to safely perform the ritual. You could have stopped the ritual because of it - but you didn’t. You didn’t know that there was a problem.

Your head was thrown back in pleasure as your fingers worked over your clit. Your body was draining of energy the closer and closer you got to orgasm. In your line of sight, you could see Rain looking back at you but his mouth reciting the Latin he’d learned. You couldn’t see Rain’s eyes, though you were desperate to know what he looked like under there right now. All eyes were on you, and it turned you on so much to know that you were being intensely watched by five masked men as you dipped two fingers into your cunt and began to hit your g-spot.

Masked men, the fifth mistake.

Had they all removed their masks, everyone would have seen the biggest problem in the room: Swiss. Not only had he stopped chanting in order to concentrate on your wetness, but his head had begun twitching. Had he not worn his mask, others would have seen his eyes glaze over and roll back into his head. They’d have noticed the white dimming into pitch blackness. They’d have been able to break the circle and preemptively send the demon back to Hell before it could fully appear in the real world. But as hot as the masks were, and as much as you loved looking at them, they were impractical and unsafe for private rituals.

The air grew thick with an unholy presence, and a palpable darkness descended upon the ritual site. The very ground seemed to tremble beneath your feet as a foul wind swirled around you, extinguishing the candles one by one.

As the ritual reached its zenith, a sudden surge of malevolent force swept through the circle, causing you all to recoil in terror. Swiss let out a deep, yet blood curdling scream causing everyone in the room to stop what they were doing and freeze, yourself included. Your wet hand now removing itself from your core and your body sitting up straight in alarm. By the time you’d focused on him, Swiss had broken the circle and was cupping his head over his helmet, as though he was in immense pain. His screaming continued as he doubled over, bent at the waist and yelling at the floor. Swiss’ voice, now filled with an otherworldly resonance, grew louder and more insistent, his body trembling with an eerie energy. One of his hands began to hit at the mask in an attempt to stop whatever was causing him so much discomfort.

“Swiss!” Dew shouted, running over to his friend. “Brother, focus! Come back to us! Phantom! Go get help, now!”

Phantom nodded and ran out the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

“Swiss, it’s me: it’s Dew. What’s wrong, brother?”

“My… head!” Swiss exclaimed through gritted teeth. “It’s in my head!”

You stood up and dressed yourself, making sure that at least your habit was covering you. All the while, you watched as Dew frantically tried to get answers out of his brother, and figure out what went wrong so he could help. Swiss was still screaming, still trying to escape out of Dew’s grasp.

Then silence.

Swiss stood straight. Still. No more screams of pain, no more frantic Dew. You couldn’t even hear the world outside the ritual room. Just maddening silence that could drive a person to insanity if they were in it for too long. Everyone remained unmoving, fearing even breathing in case it triggered something. You wanted to leave, to escape the room and get help - or even just pull your friends out and save them. But your body wouldn’t move. It wouldn’t respond to your brain’s pleas to get the fuck away.

In that chilling moment, a grotesque transformation overtook Swiss. His voice, now distorted and filled with malice, spoke words that were not his own. It was a demon that had taken hold of him, a malefic entity summoned from the abyss.

The demon had been called forth by all of the mistakes made that night. It reveled in the chaos and despair that surrounded it, relishing the opportunity to wreak havoc upon the mortal realm. With Swiss as its vessel, the demon’s power knew no bounds.

The demon’s dark presence continued to grow, casting a sinister pall over the entire Ministry. Outside of the room, a sense of unease began to spread. Siblings and Ghouls alike could feel the malevolence that radiated from the heart of the Ministry, an unnatural darkness that seemed to seep into their very souls. It was as if the very fabric of reality had been torn asunder, and the boundary between the mortal realm and the abyss had grown thin.

Everyone was simply afraid to speak, to move, to even breathe. There was a comfort in the silence that couldn’t be explained other than Swiss hadn’t attacked anyone or made any movements. You weren’t even sure if Swiss was still in there. No one move, no one blink, no one make any sounds.

Swiss moved first - his head shifting from Ghoul to Ghoul to you as though he were studying you all. He seemed more like a caged animal than a human as he weighed up his options, though he wasn’t entirely registering what he was seeing. Each room was designed with at least some kind of demonic suppressor so you knew whoever had stolen Swiss from you didn’t have the full extent of his powers. But as he’d barely done anything, you still couldn’t gauge just how dangerous he was.

Suddenly, Swiss’ eyes locked onto you and focused on nothing else. Your body was still very scantily clad in your habit, your legs fully on display even though you were hiding behind Mountain. Swiss’ mouth curled up into a sinister smile. “He likes you.” Two voices emerged from his throat, the first being Swiss’ sweet timbre, the second the demonic entity inside of him. “I am in his head. I know. I see.” He took a small step forward. “He has sinned against you. He does so nightly.” Another step. “He imagines things in his chambers when he is alone. He wants to bury himself deep inside you. Even today during the ritual, he considered getting on his knees and taking you in front of everyone.” Another step. That was when you all realised the final mistake: you.

Swiss got possessed because he was watching you masturbate in front of him. He got possessed because he was craving your body, your touch. He got possessed because he was concentrating on how you’d feel wrapped around him and didn’t pay attention to the most important things. You never should have been chosen for the ritual. You never should have agreed.

Swiss spoke again. “I think we should give him what he wants, don’t you?”

“You stay away from her!” Dew shouted. He’d gained enough confidence and bravery to step forward, arms outstretched, and ready to restrain Swiss. Or at least attempt to anyway. Dew was much, much smaller than Swiss, so even when he wasn’t possessed by a demonic entity, restraining him alone would have been damn near impossible. But the added power now coursing through Swiss’ human veins made restraint way more difficult.

All Swiss had to do was lift his hand and Dew was levitating from the ground. A simple push saw Dew flying backwards, his head smacking against the wall and his body falling limp to the floor.

“Dew!” Rain shouted. It was a natural reflex done out of fear and it caused him to lurch forward. The demon, presuming Rain had moved to attack him, copied the motion and threw Rain against the wall too, the sweetest of all the Ghouls now unmoving on the other side of the room.

Mountain still held you behind him and for every step the demon took towards you, Mountain moved you backwards. You could tell he was trying to move you towards the door without taking his eyes off of Swiss. But deep down you both knew that while Mountain was a worthy opponent for Swiss, he was no match for the thing possessing him. All Mountain could do was hope that you at least got out of the room safely especially now that the demon had its eyes on you.

“Give her willingly and your life will be spared.” Swiss’ two voices cut through the panicked silence.

“No.” Mountain said.

Swiss raised his hand into a fist and concentrated on Mountain. Mountain, like the others, was now being raised off the ground, but this time Swiss was being torturous, enjoying the pain he was inflicting internally. Mountain grasped at his throat as if a hand had been wrapped around it, and struggled to get air into his lungs. “___,” he choked out, “go!”

Somehow your body responded to the sound of his voice and you made a break for the door. There was a part of you that knew you’d never reach it - that knew you’d end up in a worse fate than your friends, but you still tried anyway. Maybe if you left, you would be able to find more help to bring. Maybe you’d run into Phantom or Papa, just someone who could come and save everyone. You refused to believe that they were all dead - you would have given up if you thought that. So for all the good it did you, you chose to run. You chose to fight as best you could.

Behind you, Mountain’s body thudded to the floor, but you could hear him gasping for breath. Swiss, who was now focussing on you trying to make your escape, didn’t put the full extent of his powers into hurting Mountain as he did Dewdrop and Rain. Mountain was weakened from the impact but he wasn’t unconscious… yet. But now you had no protection - now you were completely vulnerable.

You managed to get the door open, but by then, it was too late, Swiss had already come up behind you and slammed it shut again. His large hands grabbed onto your waist, thick fingers digging into your flesh and manoeuvring you to where he wanted you. Your own back slammed against the door and you were met with Swiss’ cold, unfeeling mask, glass eyepieces only showing a glimpse of the blackened eyes that had completely stripped away the humanity from one of your closest friends. His once beautiful smile brought you nothing but happiness now evil and no doubt the last thing you’d ever see. You struggled, fighting against the unholy strength that had caught you, but of course, you were no match for him - in fact, he seemed to enjoy you struggling. In your frantic movements, your hip grazed his and you felt his cock now standing hard beneath his Ghoulish uniform. You knew what was coming.

He cackled, the two voices giving a creepier edge to something so joyous. His free hand came to remove the helmet and allowed you to gaze at the face that was going to bring you so much pain. His eyes were, indeed, as black as you’d been told. Veins were popping from beneath his skin, no doubt Swiss straining from the inside to expel the demon from within but failing miserably. Even though you could hear it wasn’t Swiss, and you could see the eyes certainly weren’t his, it was so difficult to differentiate between demon and human. Your brain struggled reminding you that Swiss wasn’t the one who’d hurt your friends; that he wasn’t the one rubbing his clothed cock against your thigh; that his hand wasn’t squeezing one of your soft breasts so painfully hard; that it wasn’t his tongue licking a stripe from your neck to your ear.

You pushed against his large chest trying to distance yourself, but it was as if you were trying to move the Ministry itself. He wasn’t budging. “Get. Off. Me!” You grunted in your exertion.

“This Ghoul wants you - you would deny him? You would deny him after the show you put on for him?”

“There was no show!”

“Really? Because you angled your body to give him the perfect view of,” the hand that was on your breast now moved to your crotch and gripped your vulva tightly - so tightly you screamed, “this cunt. You wanted him to touch you. You were asking for him to take you. Begging for it, were you not?”

“I wasn’t!”

“Lying whore!” He slapped your face hard enough to leave a mark, the bite knocking you off kilter for a second and making the room spin. He grasped hold of your cheeks and forced you to look at him. He took his opportunity to kiss you, forcefully pressing his mouth to yours and using his tongue to lick over your unresponsive lips. Taking this opportunity, you kneed him in his crotch now extra sensitive from all the blood that had pooled there. This gave you enough respite from his attack to push him away from you and attempt an escape. The door was locked shut this time, though. And it didn’t matter anyway, he was faster than you thought.

His thick forearm wrapped around your neck and pulled your body flush against his. “You like pain, hm?” This time, when he spoke, he used only Swiss’ voice. He tightened his arm and began cutting off the air supply to your lungs. “You want me to make it hurt?”

“Swiss!” You choked from his anaconda-like grasp. “Stop!”

“He cannot help you now, little one. But I have made sure he can see everything.”

With one hand on your shoulder, he released you from his chokehold long enough to push you hard to the ground. As you stumbled and collapsed, you felt the skirt of your habit rising up over your bare ass cheeks, which earned another menacing snicker from the demon. “Look at you. The little Jezebel is ready for her master’s cock.”

“No!”

You got onto your hands and knees ready to stand and run, but you felt Swiss’ boot on your exposed backside and stamping you back down flush to the floor. Wasting no more time or effort, he straddled your hips to keep you pinned down and pressed his entire weight onto you. Over the sound of your struggling, you heard his jeans zipper undoing.

“Still some energy in you, I see.” He taunted as he placed his hands where his thighs were and moved further down your body, still fighting you. “I wonder how long that will last.”

You braved a look behind you to see if there was anything further you could do, but caught a glimpse of what Swiss was sporting under his clothes. Now he was fully exposed, you truly saw his length and girth for what it was and dread pooled in your stomach. The pain you were about to feel was beyond terrifying.

“Which hole should we rape?” Swiss asked, lining himself up with your ass and rubbing against the rim. “This one?”

“No! Please! Let me go!”

“Or this one?” He then rubbed over the entrance to your cunt and gasped. “She is wet! The whore is ready to accept Satan’s gift! She wants it even though she deludes herself otherwise.”

“I don’t want it.”

“Ghoul, which hole do you fantasize about the most, hm? Which one do you want us to rape today?” There was silence for a moment and you could swear you heard Swiss’ screams - similar screams to when he was first possessed. “Her tight, little cunt hm?”

He lined up once more with your hole, and you tried again to escape from underneath him. “Swiss! Please stop! Please! No!” Your wriggling proved useless when you felt him press inside you.

The pain was beyond anything you’d felt before, a searing white hot pain that shot through your entire body and only continued the more of him entered you. He wasn’t gentle with his movements, as expected from a demon. He bottomed out almost immediately, hitting your cervix roughly and causing you to scream. “He was right,” Swiss said, “you do feel incredible. This hole was made for cock, no wonder he spent all his time drooling over you.” He pulled out and thrust back in laughing at your pain-filled scream. “I have kept him awake so that he can remember this gift the Unholy Father has bestowed. More material for him to think about in the darkness of his room.”

“Please, stop!” Your voice was high pitched now and tears were staining your cheeks as your hands covered your mouth to muffle your cries. Your distraught sobs caught the demon’s attention, however, and he wanted his gratification.

He wrapped Swiss’ hand in your hair and tugged your face off the floor. Your mouth was hung open from your weeping and your screams escaped every time he thrust in and hit your cervix. “That is right, scream for him. Let him know how good you feel on his cock.” The sound of your cunt swallowing him made him speed up his movements, entirely enthralled by your body accepting him properly. “Show him how you love being raped by his fat cock.”

“P-please stop!”

He groaned. “Keep begging for me to stop. Keep crying for me. You get tighter every. Single. Time.” He thrust between each word, getting rougher and rougher with you.

With his hand in your hair, your head was lifted and you could look around the room. As your body was pushed along the floor by the power of his hips, your tears blurred your vision but you could still see your friends laying lifeless in front of you - spread in all manner of ways. None of them could save you. None of them could help you. If they were even alive. Your thoughts turned to Phantom, outside of this room searching for someone to come and exorcise the demon back to Hell. Your fear became overpowering at the thought of the sweet newcomer walking in and seeing you pinned beneath Swiss, being raped by someone you all used to love and trust. Would anyone else understand that this wasn’t Swiss hurting you? Would Swiss even survive the exorcism?

In a moment of adrenaline from the fear you felt, you shifted your body using all the strength you could muster. You wrapped your legs around his calves, swung your arm to hit his face and proceeded to turn as if you were about to lie on your back. Swiss didn’t anticipate this and so slipped out of you for a brief moment, falling off of you. Wasting no time, your weak legs forced you onto your feet and you ran towards the door once more. Your brain was clearer than before allowing you to unlock the door this time. But as you opened it, once again, Swiss pushed it closed.

“Clearly I have not broken you yet.”

By the collar of your habit, he pulled you back to give him the space to stand in front of you. His hand, now tightly closed in a fist, backhanded your cheek and all you saw was black.

When you came to, your jaw ached so badly. Your vision was blurred and it took a while to come to. Your hands were held above your head as you lay on your back, a large hand holding them together and restraining you. As your head was turned to its side, you saw Mountain and Rain laying next to each other, still entirely unconscious and unmoving. But you were still being attacked.

Now that you were pinned to the floor, and had been out for you didn’t know how long, Swiss had chance to fully savour you. Your habit had been torn town the middle, exposing you completely to the demonic eyes you were now staring into, those very eyes entranced by the way your breasts bounced from the roughness of his thrusts. His cock was now spearing into you much harder than before, the position allowing him to fuck into you deeper. His pubic mound was grinding against your clit as he pounded away, and for the first time that night you were feeling pleasure with the pain.

“I knew you wanted this.” Swiss said from above you upon hearing the small pleasured whimper that escaped you. “I knew you were a whore who loved getting raped. How you would spread your legs for anyone who offered you a bit of attention. I am not wrong, am I?” You moaned again accidentally, this time louder. “Say it. Tell me how much you love it. Tell him that you love it when he rapes you.” When you didn’t obey, he wrapped his hands around your throat. “Say it!”

“I love it!” You shouted reluctantly. “I love being raped!”

Somehow this wasn’t a lie. Since waking up, every hit against your cervix, every drag of his cock against your walls felt delicious. The demonic black of his eyes, the thick hands that held you down had you spreading your legs wider to let him continue abusing your hole. You were getting wetter and wetter with each thrust, more desperate to cum than ever before. You fear dissipated and was replaced with nothing but cock. The weight of it driving you crazy, the way he used you for his own pleasure and revelled in your agony. How he lowered himself to lick your tears away and bury himself inside you over and over again.

“There you go. That was not difficult. You got so much tighter too.”

Your screams turned from pain to desperation. Your mouth hung open in a perfect O. His cock had broken you, stripped you of everything and turned you into his own, personal toy. You sat up as much as you could to see where you both were connected. You saw the base of his cock was rimmed with white where your wetness had turned to cream and stuck in his pubic hairs. Each pull out of you had multiple strings of your own juices forming and snapping. You could feel yourself spilling out of your hole and running down your body, gathering on the wooden floor below you. Fuck! It felt so fucking good.

“Will you cum on his cock? Will you cum on the cock that rapes you?”

“Yes!” You screamed looking back up into his eyes. “I’m gonna c-cum! I’m gonna cum! I’m gonna-!”

The door opened right as your orgasm hit, your mind clouding over and drool dripping from your mouth as you came all over Swiss’ cock. The last thing you remember seeing was Papa Copia’s eyes look into yours in horror as you came like a desperate whore while your close friend took you against your will. Then the world went black.

When you came to, your eyes refused to open at first. Your head was pounding from the physical trauma and there was a deep-seated pain in your core that sent stabbing pains through your legs every time you moved them.You groaned and tried to sit up but your body refused to respond. The heart monitor beside you kept bleeping letting you know that you were, in fact, alive, but also that you were currently in the infirmary. But there was another sound coming from the foot of your incredibly uncomfortable bed. When your eyes finally opened it took you a while to fully process what you were seeing.

Swiss.

In a moment of pure fear, you panicked and tried to move further up the bed, as far away from him as you possibly could. You could feel a scream building in your throat, but your jaw hurt you too much to move it. Even still, your fear didn’t care. Swiss’ eyes were back to normal, and glassy with unshed tears. His face, pale and sickly, stained with the tears he had cried. He looked awful - his veins tinted a little black from the pressure of the demon inhabiting his body.

“Please, don’t scream!” He said quickly. “It’s me again. The demon’s gone.” You wanted to open your mouth and ask him what he was doing there, but your jaw wouldn’t move. “Your jaw isn’t broken, but it’s badly bruised from where I…” He started crying again, burying his head on your bed. “I’m so fucking sorry!” He wept hard, your heart breaking for him every time you saw his shoulders violently shake. “I hurt you so b-bad. I’m so sorry! I d-didn’t want to do any of th-those things. I tried - I tried to stop but it was t-too… strong. It w-wasn’t me!”

Deep down you knew it wasn’t. You knew Swiss would never hurt you like that because he never had. He’d never shown that level of ferocity and violence to anyone or anything. He was the kindest soul in the Ministry - a ray of sunlight the morning after a storm. Before all of this, you would have trusted him with anything, your life included. But even though reason told you he wasn’t the monster that attacked you, your brain still registered him as the attacker. When you saw his eyes before he hid them, you could have sworn for a brief moment they were still black. You wanted to comfort him, to tell him that it was okay and you forgave him even though there wasn’t anything to forgive. But there was such a hesitation. An annoying voice in the back of your head saying “what if”? What if that really was him? What if they didn’t exorcise the demon out? They must have otherwise he’d be in chains in the dungeons right now. So, you reached your hand out and touched his head, gently stroking at his hair. Tears were falling down your face too as your brain replayed the trauma.

When you both had calmed down a little, and Swiss was no longer hiding his face from you, you both sat in silence staring at each other. You were studying his face for imperfections and signals that he was unsafe, and he was studying yours for any hints of fear that should tell him he needed to go. “I know it’s selfish of me being here.” He said. “It only happened yesterday. I’m not supposed to be here. Papa’s going to come and talk to you when you’re feeling stronger, he wants you to decide my punishment.”

You shook your head. You didn’t want to punish him.

“Everyone else is fine. Dew has a broken shoulder but he’ll live. Rain has concussion. Mountain’s up and out of the infirmary with no problems at all.” Your mind cast itself back to yesterday, watching Swiss barrel through them and throw them around like children’s toys. How helpless you felt when he was inside you and they were all in the room, knocked out from his attack. How none of them helped you.

“I shouldn’t have come but I needed to see you. I feel so guilty. I…” he hesitated. “I can’t stop thinking about it. About you. I felt everything the de- he did to you. I heard everything, saw everything, felt everything. And you felt so… especially when… fuck! I know I shouldn’t but I keep remembering and my body reacts. I’ve used my hand so many times since but nothing compares to… I need it. I need you. One more time. Please.”

There was a feeling of dread pooling in your stomach again but you could understand where he was coming from. Since you’d been awake and your mind was showing you the images from yesterday, you were also losing your mind. You remembered everything in graphic detail, especially how good it felt when you woke up on the floor. Arousal began to replace the dread and your thighs rubbed together, making you hiss in pain. But the pain and the arousal seemed to control you, and for some reason unbeknownst to you, you nodded your head.

Swiss didn’t need to be told twice. He pulled back the comforter and climbed onto the bed. He lifted up the infirmary nightgown you were wearing and exposed your abused hole to him. You could see his cock tenting through his own nightgown at the sight of you. You were so broken and vulnerable, and it did things to him he knew he’d feel guilty for later on. But he just couldn’t resist any longer. It was like he was addicted to you. To it. “I can’t promise I’ll be gentle.” He told you. He lifted your gown further up to expose your breasts again before pulling himself free and lining himself up. You wanted to tell him to not be gentle, to disrespect you like he had yesterday, but the words couldn’t come out.

Pushing into you, you felt the same searing pain you felt the first time he did. You were so under prepared yesterday and even more so today. But after a few uncomfortable thrusts, the pleasure returned once more, and your hands, now finally responding, flew to his shoulders and grasped on, digging your nails into his skin.

His mouth had hung open and his own grunts and moans were escaping as he lost himself in the pleasure and the memory of your fear. You were deprived of this yesterday - and you were convinced that if you’d heard how good he felt, you’d have given up fighting long before you did.

“You feel even better than yesterday.” He muttered. His thrusts got rougher and you could feel the infirmary bed moving beneath you, groaning at the weight and the intense movement. “I kept thinking about how wet you got. The way you creamed on my fucking cock. I came twice to that thought alone. Fuck!”

Though your jaw was in pain, you were still able to whimper from the feeling of his fat cock railing you in a similar fashion to yesterday. Your own noises kept spurring him on.

“And when you screamed, yelling out how much you loved me raping you. Fucking hell. I want to hear it again. I want to hear you beg me to rape you over and fucking over. I want to keep you speared on my cock and make you cum on it because I just won’t stop raping you.”

You tightened at the thought, which made him let out a particularly loud moan.

“You want that, too?”

You nodded.

“Fuck. You want me to turn you into a little fucking rape toy, hm? A fuck-slut that’s only good for taking my fucking cum against her will. Have you beg me to stop while also sucking my cock back into your little hole.”

You dug your nails in again which prompted his hips to smack forward and whack your cervix.

“I’ll do it. Shit. I’ll find you when you’re out of the infirmary and I’ll force you to the fucking floor. I’ll take what I want from you when I want. You want that?”

You nodded.

“Fucking hell, I’m gonna cum. I’m gonna cum again. I came inside you yesterday too. They had a hard time pulling me off you. I just kept holding onto your hips and railing you into the floor. I’m gonna keep doing it now. Use you as my fucking cum receptacle. Rape a baby into you too. Show everyone who this hole belongs to.”

You tightened and moaned again.

“I went feral when they pulled me off of you and I saw my cum spilling out. Proof that I’d - fuck I’m cu-cumming!”

Once again he pushed himself as far into you as he possibly could and stilled, painting your walls with his seed.

No one else had ever made you feel that good before. The fact that he was recreating the shared trauma also did things to you that you couldn’t quite explain. You knew he was suffering as much as you were, that the guilt was eating away at him in the same way the fear was. Maybe that was why you willingly spread your legs for him this time, because you needed someone who knew to make you feel good.

When he’d finished, he watched himself spilling out of you. “Fuck…” he lamented. “No tissues. You didn’t cum.”

You wanted to tell him not to bother, that a nurse might show up midway through. You knew how bad it would look that the man who’d raped you had come back for seconds not twenty-four hours after the incident. But even if you could speak, he wouldn’t listen.

He bent down and placed his tongue in your hole, licking his cum out of you. He swirled his tongue around your cunt, trying to find the parts of you that would tip you over the edge. Once he’d determined that you were clean enough, he moved up to your clit and sucked. Hard. It was like he knew that his treatment of you yesterday meant that you needed it rough today too, and so he did his best to deliver. He didn’t let up until you came on his face, your own juices spilling out of you. You did your best to muffle the scream that was threatening to come out of you as you tipped over the edge, hyper-aware of the fact that a nurse could come rushing in to make sure you were okay. Swiss knew this too and so finished up as quickly as he possibly could.

“I’ll see you later, yeah?”

You nodded and watched him press a kiss to your temple, completely juxtaposing his treatment of you both yesterday and today before making his exit back to his own ward.

You watched him leave and let your eyes wander around the room. That was when you noticed it and froze in panic. There was a security camera in the top corner of the room… and it had just captured everything.

Kinktober: Previous Day ⛧ Next Day

Hellish Delights:

Masterlist ⛧ Hellish Delights Masterlist

Previous Part ⛧ Next Part

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royalsweetteaa · 9 months

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Hi! I really like your HC AU. Could you do one of how Cevans characters would react to reader flinching during an argument?

Oooh I love this idea! 🥹💔 Let’s get to it!

POV: Y/N flinches in midst of an argument.

Warning - The following HC contains: angst/fluff, comfort, reader has hinted trauma.

Steve Rogers

Steve would cut himself off and stare at you. “Doll, why did you wince like that?…did I raise my voice too loud? I didn’t mean to if I did but I….you know me…I have never and wouldn’t…” Steve begins to ramble a little with his words as he processes what just happened. “Who hurt you, my love? Please, tell me…I’m worried…this had to have come from somewhere, right?” Steve asks as he’s ready to receive an explanation while pulling you in to stroke your back gently. He listens, already plotting in his head to pay ‘someone’ a visit responsible for your trauma response.

Ransom Drysdale

Ransom raises his eyebrows as he sees you flinch and he furrows, confused. “Kitten,…did you seriously think I was about to hit you just now?” Ransom would ask with his arms crossed. “…Do you think I would steep that low?” A part of him takes offense as he first assumes that’s the whole story, but the pieces pick up slowly that this could have come from a previous encounter. He sighs, realizing he’s handling this poorly. “Darling…I didn’t mean for you to react that way. I hope you’re not scared of me…are you?” He’s relieved when you shake your head, and he decides it’s best if you both take a break from arguing. He comforts you, reassuring there’s nothing to be worried about. He hopes you’ll eventually tell him and explain on your own why you flinched.

Andy Barber

Andy would shut his mouth the moment he sees you flinch, and he would stay still as he processes the moment. When he receives your look of feeling guilty, his face softens, “Oh honey…it’s okay, let’s stop arguing about this and talk about what happened, okay? Did I scare you?” He asks first, not wanting to put much pressure on you. He wants to know right away if it was him who had caused you to flinch, and he wants you to feel safe so he speaks in his most soothing tone. When he sees you’re not reacting negatively to his closeness, he pulls you in to an embrace, making you feel safe.

Jake Jensen

Jake would stiffen, wondering what just happened to make you flinch. “Are you okay? You just flinched as if I was going to…” his heart breaks in a million pieces as he puts two and two together. He carefully takes your hands to give you reassurance. “Baby, what happened? Was it me?…You know you can talk to me about anything…I’m all ears, always.” Jake would reassure as he makes you sit down on the couch with him encouraging a chat about it. This incident would bother Jake for a long time, and he would often catch himself in future mid-arguments asking if he’s not coming across as too aggressive to make sure you won’t react like that ever again.

Johnny Storm

Johnny’s sentence would die out the moment he sees you wince and ask, “What was that?”, distraught and confused. “Did you just…” he doesn’t complete his sentence as he flattens his hands and raises them. “Babe,…I’m never putting my hand on you…my parents, while they died when I was very young raised me good enough to know that’s never okay…I wouldn’t do that even if you called me names or cursed at me like Ben always does!” He makes light out of the situation to distract you and pulls you in to caress you when he sees a small smile form on your lips, already leaving you two to forget about what you were even arguing about.

Ari Levinson

Ari’s response to you flinching would be to take a step back and give space between the two of you. He’s encountered women with traumatic responses before and knows that to deescalate the trigger, he needs to show he isn’t going to do any harm, like raising his hand. He would then say to you in a soothing voice, “Sweetheart,…I apologize if I came off as heated just now…let’s put this aside and think of something else, alright?” He would then crouch down, look up at you and making himself small to further deescalate your trauma response. You would respond getting closer to him and come into his welcoming and warm embrace, as you know Ari’s safe. It’s all forgotten and Ari doesn’t see any point of bringing up the argument again. Your feeling of safety comes first.

Thank you @imyourbratzdoll for helping me out a little on this one! ♥️🥰

Hearts & Reblogs are very appreciated! <3

#cevans characters hcs #cevans characters x reader #cevans characters #ce characters x reader #steve rogers x reader #ransom drysdale x reader #ari levinson x female reader #johnny storm x reader #jake jensen x reader #andy barber x reader #steve rogers x y/n #ransom drysdale x y/n #ari levinson x y/n #johnny storm x y/n #jake jensen x y/n #andy barber x y/n

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via-l0ve · 10 months

Note

Thank you so much for doing my request. I loved it. Could please write abt the Spn boy when they like the reader but reader is dating someone else who they are very happy with. I'm in the mood for angst.

I Love You, So (Please, let me go) {SPN pref!} ❤️‍🩹

a/n: i love angst. unrequited love is so great but i hate it but i love it lolol. hope you enjoy babes!! (title is a song lyric from ‘I Love You So’ by The Walters!) (also i didn’t include crowley bc all i could think about was him killing the s/o LMFAOOO so i decided to not)

warnings: angst, overall sadness lol, drinking/alcohol

Dean:

i think it would be hard for him to accept and grasp

he’d try and distract himself with one night stands with other women, knowing he’d leave them in the morning or in the dead of night

every time he’d see your s/o and you he’d die a little inside

he really thinks he could treat you so much better

he’d flirt with you but you’d shrug it off as just playful interaction and it would be really sad for him to see

but he dosent want to ruin your relationship

if anyone knows how hard the hunter life can be - it’s dean

he’d give anything to have a ‘normal’ life

it just sucks that he can’t have it with you </3

Sam:

sam tries to be unbothered

he gets jealous though

he sees your partner touch you so innocently and his blood boils

but he tries to keep his cool

for your sake

if your partner ever made you upset he would get so protective

always taking your side fr

even if it’s over something dumb or even if you’re CLEARLY in the wrong

sammy will side with you

it really does break his heart though

i think deep down he’d think it’s a good thing bc he’s definitely got some deep rooted trauma from all of his past lovers dying so gruesome

so even though he’s literally heartbroken he’ll deal with it bc he sees that you’re happy

but he daydreams about you and what it would be like to grow old together </3

Castiel:

i don’t think cas would totally get it

but i think he’d understand that he couldn’t make any moves on you

he’d be frustrated

it’s not only bad that he’s feeling this way for a human, let alone a human who can’t even feel the same way about him :(

he wishes he could��ve met you before your partner

you’ll catch him staring at you

he talks about you

too much for it to be normal

just simple things

“did you know how much y/n likes *insert thing*?”

“i watched this television clip and it reminded me of y/n.”

everything reminds him of you

he just wants to be close to you and as important to you as you are to him :(

#love u mwah #thank you sm for this request #castiel #castiel x reader #dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #supernatural imagine #supernatural

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wildemaven · 1 year

Text

Duality Of A Man: Pt. 2

Pairing: Joel Miller/Frankie Morales x F!Reader / AU

WC: 2300

Warnings: T; Mentions of killing, death, birth, birth trauma, food; If I’ve forgotten anything please let me know.

A/N: Firstly, It’s here! Secondly, read part one before reading this or none of this will make any sense to you. I was so worried about having a two part story, mainly because I didn’t want this second part to not contribute to how the first part ended. So I’m really hoping the intensity carried over to this part. Like I mentioned in the first part, this is an alternate universe but I still tried to use storylines from both characters to piece it all together. In it being set in an alternate universe, I fudged the timeline and ages so it made more sense to the Joel’s past— he’s roughly 38 in this verse. Like always, this is not beta’d and all mistakes are made by me! Enjoy!!

Masterlist / Part 1 / Part 3

“Fuck!”

You’re both frozen in the moment. The tension palpable.

A heavy sigh leaves his throat as his head falls forward, a hand scrubbing down his face. The one thing he’s kept from you, now barreling back into his life.

He straightens himself back up. Looking at you, your features distressed and tense. It’s then he notices the faint glimmer of a tear rolling down your cheek.

“Sweetheart, lemme explain.” The heavy silence broken by his thick drawl.

“Joel, what—“ Your hands wiping the at the wetness. “Is that even your name?” You question him.

“No— well, yes technically. But no, sweetheart it’s not. But if you give me a chance I can explain everything to ya.”

He starts to take a step forward, his arms extending out to you.

“I— I need a minute, please.” Your hand shooting up to keep some space between you. “Just—“ You turn and walk to the kitchen, hoping for more time to wrap your head around all this new information.

Joel is not in fact your Joel. He’s married? Your stomach drops at the thought of being the other woman. You catch yourself on the counter, your arms barely keeping your shaky form upright, knuckles white as they grip the edge of the cold stone.

You close your eyes and focus on your breathing, taking a moment to slow your heartbeat.

The shuffle of Joel’s boots against the tiled floor as he enters the room breaks your trance.

“Sweetheart—“ His voice barely above a whisper, pleading for your attention. You wipe the remaining tears that have fallen before turning to him. Leaning back into the counter, arms cross in front of you as you mentally prepare yourself for the explanation he’s about to give you.

“What’s your real name?” You begin to question him first.

“Francisco— Francisco Morales is my real name. Everyone called me Frankie though.” He explains.

You attempt to swallow the lump that’s formed in your throat as you turn your head, glancing out the small window above the sink, life still moving forward outside as yours stands still within these walls. Trying your best to hold back the onslaught of tears that have started to form. Your Joel isn’t your Joel. He’s Francisco, Frankie.

“Who is Kelli and why was she on our front doorstep explaining to me she’s your wife? That she’s been needing to talk to you for years? Fuck Joel! I’m no fucking home-wrecker!” Your voice slightly laced with aggravation at the thought of coming between someone’s marriage.

“It’s not like that sweetheart.”

“Then what the fuck is it like Joel? Huh? What am I suppose to think when I have this woman telling me she’s your fucking wife?! Please explain that to me!”

“I will. I will explain everything to ya. But ya gotta know, I never meant to lie or hurt ya. Ya gotta know that babe.” His jaw shifting, a nervous tick he has when he feels most vulnerable. You want nothing more than to wrap your arms around him, because you still love the man standing before you.

Of all the qualities about Joel, his honesty was one of his best. He didn’t beat around the bush, he always gave it straight. And even now, you can sense the truth is what he’s about to deliver to you.

You nod in agreement, because you know this about him— he would never do anything to deliberately hurt you. He’s a protecter and cares deeply.

“Go on then. Tell me everything. Help me understand, please.” Your voicing cracking, encouraging him to continue.

He props himself up against the counter across from you. One arm crossed, his elbow of the other resting on it, thumb tracing back and forth on his bottom lip. Contemplation and worry weighing heavily on him as he tries to decide where to start.

He looks up at you, and it pains him to see the hurt in your eyes by his doing. He takes a deep breath to steady himself and then tells you everything.

“I joined the army when I was 18. I was shit in school and didn’t think I would amount to anything, so the first recruiter to catch my eye had me signin’ up on the spot.” He hasn’t talked about his past to anyone and now here he is spilling it all for you in your shared kitchen. “Became a helicopter pilot and spent the rest of my time enlisted flyin’”

“Did a few tours after I joined. I was overseas more than I was home at that point. When I got back after my last deployment, I met Kelli. She was a friend of a friend and we’d hit it off. I knew instantly that she was the one.”

You wince at his words, ‘the one.’ This was nearly 15 years ago, but hearing him say that he had fallen in love and married the love of his life is a pain you’d never expected to feel waking up this morning.

“We married after only knowing each other 6 months. We were good— we were happy.” He sounds as if he’s trying to convince himself of this.

“A couple years later, a few army buddies of mine convinced me to do this off the record recce— they needed a pilot. The pay out was hefty and I knew it would help Kelli ‘n I out a ton. She wanted to by a house, but we couldn’t afford it on our incomes combined.”

He takes a minute to let his thoughts sit for a bit. You haven’t said a word since he started talking. He’s not sure if you’re trying to process it all or contemplate how you plan on leaving him when he’s finished.

“We fought about it for a week, she didn’t want me to go. It was in Colombia and I’d have to go silent while I was gone. She said she wouldn’t be there when I got back.”

“The recce was supposed to be a quick in and out— It wasn’t. We had to kill men, bad men, one of them this big time drug lord. We didn’t get the money and lost one of our own on our way home.”

“I’m so sorry Joel.” Your empathic response hits him hard.

“When I got back Kelli was gone, just like she said. I was broke and alone, I hated myself for what I did.”

“Joel—“ Your heartbreaking at his admission. You want to comfort him and show him that despite everything he’s telling you, you’re still here for him.

“No!” It comes out harsher than he means, and he hates the way you flinch at it. “No, let me finish. You need to know everything.”

“The consequences finally caught up to us a year later. Men were after us and we had to go into hiding. We were able to get some strings pulled from some higher ups. Set us up with new names, social security numbers— washed us of our previous lives. Came out here to Texas to start fresh, create a life for myself.”

There’s a pregnant pause, but your intuition tells you there’s more.

“Tommy, he’s not your brother, is he?”

“No.” He shakes his head at your question. “He’s my cousin, on my dad’s side, I was able to get his last name. He let me crash on his couch for a bit until I was able to set some roots down. Everyone just assumed we were brothers so we didn’t see the need in correcting them.”

“And Sarah— Is she Kelli’s?” The question subdued but one he hasn’t answered yet.

“No, Kelli never wanted kids— which is fine, her right.” He sighs, shoulders sagging as the weight begins to lift with each word he speaks. “I met Sarah’s mom not long after I moved here— wasn’t anything serious. After a few months she’d found out she was pregnant. I told her I wanted to be apart of the baby’s life and we planned to try and make it work together, for Sarah’s sake.”

He stops. The pain in his eyes is too much to witness from where you were. You close the distance between you and him, cupping his face with your hand, his eyes flutter closed as he leans into it.

“It’s okay—” You lift his gaze to yours, grounding him in that moment. “It’s okay baby!” He nods in return.

“Her mom died while giving birth. It was the most devastating thing I’d ever been through.” A sob cracks in his throat, the tears streaming down his distraught face. You pull him in close, arms wrapping around him, cradling his head with one hand as he tucks his face into your neck.

He’d never shared what had happened between him and Sarah’s mom, and you never felt the need to pry it out of him.

You both stand there for a while. No words exchanged, letting him continue on his own.

The stereo still filling the room with its static resonance muffling the quiet cries pouring into your shoulder.

“Hey—Hey look at me.” Joel’s head slowly lifting from his place of comfort. Your fingers gently work at wiping away the tears, the pain still lingering in his expression. “I’m so sorry Joel. I can’t imagine having to deal with all that, to then have to shut that part of you out. Thank you for telling me, for being honest about all of this. I’m here though when ever you need to talk about it okay?”

“I should be the one apologizing sweetheart. You’re taking this too well for someone who just had 15 years worth of secrets thrown at them in the last 30 minutes.”

You can’t help the soft chuckle that you give him. Your thumb softly caresses his cheek, “You should know I don’t scare that easily by now Miller. Yeah, it was a complete shock to have this all dropped on me— but I don’t think of you any less. I vaguely remember telling you on our first date 5 years ago, I’m tougher than I look.”

That makes him smile.

“Does Sarah know? About all of this?”

“No, none of it. I’m just dad, grumpy Joel Miller to her and Tommy’s her uncle— she knows nothing different. She knows about her mom though, told her when she was old enough to ask why she was the only one in school with out one. She took it pretty well.”

“She’s a smart kid, she takes after someone I know.”

“Me?”

“No, me!” You swat at his chest playfully.

His eyes roll, but he knows you’re right. You’ve been in their lives the better part of 5 years now. The closest thing to a mother figure Sarah’s ever known. And he’s grateful that you treat her with as much love as you do.

“Okay, so that only leaves one question. Why now? Why come all this way to find you if she’d left you high and dry all those years ago?”

“I’m guessing to have me sign some paperwork. We never officially divorced— legally we’re still married.”

“Hmm. That would make sense I guess. She left her number to give her a call. Maybe sign those papers so I don’t feel like I’m meddling in someone’s marriage.”

That garners a hearty chuckle from him and he agrees to give her a call— officially put his past behind him.

He leans in, his lips crashing into yours, pouring his heart into the kiss. It’s tender, yet you can feel the love he’s trying to convey through it.

The creak of the front door signals Sarah’s arrival home.

“Hey! I’m home!” She announces herself, stopping in the doorway of the kitchen, giving a questioning look at you and Joel still holding each other.

“Did someone die?!” Her hand clasped against her chest and she gasps. “It was Mrs. Adler wasn’t it?! I’m gonna miss her cookies!”

“What? No! No one died!” Joel says as you try to stifle the laugh bubbling in your chest.

“Then why do you two look so— depressed?”

“We’re just having a— moment?” You try to sound confident in your words and you think she’s bought it, but her cocked eyebrow says otherwise.

“A moment? At 10 am on a Sunday—“ She continues looking between the both of you. “In the middle of the kitchen? You two really need to work on your lying skills. I’ve heard a 5 year old sound more convincing than what I’m hearing.”

“Alright!” Joel pushes off the counter, hands clapping together to bring the discussion to a close. “That’s enough outta you young lady. Go on upstairs and put your stuff away, we’re going out for burgers and ice cream in a bit. Make sure you take a shower, wash off that sass you brought home with ya.”

She retreats without a comeback, the ploy of some good food and dessert is enough to get her moving.

You’re both still standing in middle of the kitchen, a comfortable silence washing over the both of you. “We’re okay, right?” He asks you, normalcy already settling back into the present. “Yeah Babe, we’re okay.”

“So— What am I suppose to call you now?”

“Call me? ‘m not followin’.” Confused and unsure what you’re asking.

“Ya know, just wanna make sure I’m screaming the right name later on tonight.” You say with a cheeky grin.

“Is that so?!” He lurches forward, grabbing at your waist as you try to make your escape, but his arms are quicker than your legs. “Woman, you are a menace!” He growls into your neck, gifting you a few nips as he tickles your sides.

Your arms flailing about as you try to hold him off, your head thrown back as you laugh in defeat. It’s his favorite to see you so carefree and happy, he’s grateful he’s the one on the receiving end of it.

Your hands locking behind his neck, pulling yourself up to him. “Yeah, but I’m your menace Joel.” You whisper against his lips.

“Mmmm, that you are sweetheart. I love you.”

“And I love you.”

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #Joel Miller #tlou au #Frankie morales #Francisco morales #Pedro pascal #TLOU #triple frontier #wildemaven writes #tlou hbo #the last of us hbo #hbo the last of us

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f4irycafe · 2 years

Note

Hi could you please write some headcanons for Tarquin and Tamlin, about what they'd do or how would they react if their mates where pregnant.

ofc my love !! thanks for the request. requests are open. COMMENTS AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED <3

pregnant s/o hc’s

characters: tarquin. tamlin.

warnings: none all fluff!

tarquin

his goal (aside from class equality, let’s go king tarquin 😌) has always been to settle down and start a family. so you can imagine his absolute JOY when he found out you were pregnant.

he starts bragging about the baby before they’re even born.

oh he’s just the best. he knows your strong, independent, and capable, so i honestly don’t think he’d hover too much. he knows you can handle yourself, which is one of the reasons why he loves you so much.

all that he ask is if you leave the palace to either take cressida, varian, or one of the guards just in case.

one thing he will do though is make sure you’re eating and sleeping well. he wants this baby to be healthy, so that means keeping YOU healthy.

def talks to the baby at night.

hell lay by your side, his hand rubbing your stomach gently as he tells both of his favorite people about his day and what he has planned for tomorrow.

never leaves u without kissing your tummy first, even when the babe was a little bean.

overall, very excited to bring a sweet new life into the world.

tamlin

did someone say childhood trauma 🤔

please make sure you have someone else with you when you break the news to him, he will pass out and fall over immediately.

i think he’s be pretty freaked out at first. we all know how his own childhood was, and the memories he has of his brothers and father.

hopes for a girl so that they can be like you and his mother 🤍 but would be just as happy with a boy.

once he gets over his initial shock and fear, oh lordssss.

where tarquin was chill tamlin was most definitely the exact opposite.

always fussing. one wince and he’s like “is it the baby? are you okay? what do you need?”

it was sweet at first, but the later you get in the pregnancy the more annoying it gets. you had to yell at him to tell him to just leave you the fuck alone a few times before he started to chill out.

gives you everything you want, even if it’s a whim.

he’s so nervous to be a dad, he doesn’t want to mess up. he also knows the legacy he’s bringing the child into and wants to change for them.

he won’t want them to deal with all the conflicts and petty drama he’s had to go through over the years. he’s make a point to begin to right his wrongs so that that may be a reality for his child.

summary - very stressed someone give this man some tea and a nap

#tarquin cafe <3 #tamlin cafe <3 #tarquin x reader #tamlin x reader #tarquin x you #tamlin x you #tarquin x yn #tamlin x yn #acotar x reader #a court of thorns and roses #acotar #rhysand x reader #azriel x reader #cassian x reader

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sublimecatgalaxy · 2 years

Note

Hi, I hope it's okay that I do another request, could you please write something about the reader having a bad day somewhere new. Like it was her first day and it didn't go as she had hoped. (I had a bad day in a new environment and it didn't go as I had hoped so... yeah?) Anyway, could you please do something fluffy with Jonathan Byers comforting the reader after they come home from wherever and it's all comforting and fluffy. Please and thank you? I hope you're doing okay and your operation went okay and post-op isn't too bad

Finally fulfilling this request because I think it would genuinely help my soul to write and I hope this helps someone else too.

My body is just about to give out by the time my back hits the mattress, my pounding head making my eyes water as I listen to my fan spin on a constant loop.

College was supposed to be fun, a new experience where I learn how to find myself and really dig deep into who I am. But the day started off with me a minute late to my first intro to literature class and the professor slammed the door in my face and made the deliberate effort to lock the door, telling me silently that I wouldn't be welcome in class.

After that, a TA spilled coffee on me as she turned the corner, the scalding drink making a mess of the new sweater I bought just for today. I cried while buying some school merch from the school store, not having enough time between classes to go home and change.

The rest of the events of my day were small enough for me not to remember, other than missing my bus and being forced to walk home a mile and a half in the rain.

I was so excited to move out of Hawkins and to the amazing city of Los Angeles, to attend the school of my dreams and start over. I wanted to get a breath after the years of trauma that Hawkins inflicted upon me and my dearest friends.

And my boyfriend.

My phone ringing beside me snaps me out of my grumpy haze, my eyes tiredly opening to look over at my lit up phone, a smile taking over my expression at the sight of Jonathan's name across the screen. I'm quick to snatch it off of my pillow and answer it without hesitation.

"Hi honey." He hums and my eyes flutter to picture him laying in a similar way that I am, back against his headboard, a fond, excited smile sprawled out across his lips at the sound of my quiet breathing through the phone line.

It's been difficult to get used to the long distance but with Jonathan and I both being very independent people, we've only flourished and our relationship has only gotten stronger. But I'd be lying if I said that, after a day like this, I didn't miss his arms around me.

"Hey, babe. How are you?" I ask, kicking my feet up on the bed and kicking my uncomfortable shoes off at the same time, letting out a breath of relief.

"Good, good. Hopper just left, came over to help Will with some essay." Jonathan chuckles, a small chuckle leaving him as a smirk spreads across my lips.

"Oh, he came just for Will? Not for your mom." I snort, pulling a groaned laugh from my boyfriend as the line breaks up for a moment as he moves.

"Shut up. How was your day?" He asks and suddenly my laughter and happiness is sucked from me at the slight recollection of everything that's happened to me today and shame fills me at the thought of having to tell him how poorly it went. "It was your first day of classes right?" He quizzes with a small sniffle.

"Yeah..." I trail off with a small sigh, shaking my head as my eyes flutter shut. "Would it be already just to say that it was the worst day ever but that I really don't wanna talk about it?" I whisper, my voice trembling a bit and my stomach swirling anxiously.

"Yeah, uh, are you sure you're okay?" He asks, his own anxiety lacing his voice at the thought of me feeling such weighted emotions without him being here to pluck them away, one by one.

"I'm okay now that we're talking. Just tell me something to cheer me up." I laugh, reaching up to bat away any stray tears that have escaped me without permission, my eyes burning.

"Hmm." He hums, clicking his tongue. "I could tell you how much I love you?" He offers and I giggle, rolling over onto my stomach at his cheesiness. "I could tell you how much I missed you today and since you've been gone-"

"Yeah I like this plan." I cheer, a huge grin taking over my flushed, tear stained cheeks.

"Oh yeah?" He laughs, the image of his eyes burning into my mind. "Alright, then stop interrupting and let me make you feel better."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane2828 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi

@crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the-heart @vampviolets@haylee-e@popehaywardssecretgf @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife @smoke-and-fire @officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @smoke-and-fire386 @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @minjix @luvrosee @storytellingwitht

#jonathan #jonathan x reader #jonathan byers #jonathan byers x reader #stranger things #stranger things fic

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fategoflatass · 1 year

Text

final thoughts · fall 2022

since i know there're people who like to read my opinions on the different seasons, here you have my thoughts on this (HOLY SHIT OMG WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON???????????) season.

akiba meido sensou (7.5/10)

so, i never meant to watch this show. i thought it would be just another CGDCT slice of life where maids do their maid stuff, and they have fun... I WASN'T EXPECTING THIS THO. this series is crazy, like, the first ep starts with a maid being shot in the head like ??????? and then ranko (best girl imo) starts shooting this rival maid group along with a cutsie song like ??????????????? i was both confused and charmed. this anime is such a blast, it's filled with twists and turns, random shit that it's bizarre but it also makes so much sense. i can't fully explain it, you need to watch it.

akuyaku reijou nano de last boss wo kattemimashita (4/10)

dear lord the toxicity here is astronomical. the way i was looking for a hamefura replacement and i ended up getting this... i feel scammed. this was meant to be a fantasy romance story, but it ended up being a contest to see who's the most toxic person in the relationship. between throwing someone out of a flying carriage just to see them cry and almost stabbing someone on the crotch because they want to break off their engagement with you... i don't know who's worse. they totally deserve each other.

blue lock (8.5-8/10)

i cannot decide myself on what rating i should give to it. while i do love bllk and think is one of the best sports series i've ever read, 8-bit's adaptation is... interesting. while i did think the first episode was amazing, the visual level just started dropping. some of the hand-drawn animation looks weird, and the cgi sometimes looks like it has been taken from a mobile game. i have mixed feelings with these series; while it's still fun and interesting, it just doesn't kick me as much in the chest as the manga does. if you wanna start bllk, please read the manga first.

bocchi the rock! (6.5/10)

as i said before, i'm not a big fan of CGDCT, and this series is just that. i was into the music part of the series and bocchi's social phobia (which, as someone who went through it, i think it's a pretty good representation), but it's still not my cup of tea. it bores me at times, and i'm the one to blame. it's not bad, it's just not my thing. if you're into this kinda stuff, i fully recommend it.

boku no hero academia 6 (8/10)

NOW THAT IS A GOOD SEASON. this one's adapting one of (if not the) best arcs in the series and hell yeah i'm hyped. in case someone hasn't started it, i won't spoil anything. i'll just tell you to please not worry about the quality: the art, animation and everything in general is being tretaed with so much thought and love. i'm just so happy to see all of them back!

boku no roboco (4/10)

(at this point, i've only watched two eps. my opinion on the series may change) i know the manga is popular, i know it makes a lot of anime references. i wanted to try giving it a chance and oh lord. first, it's difficult to find. second, it isn't even funny. if i'm not dropping it is because the episodes are short and fuck it. but not because you make a shit tone of anime references means that you're gonna be funny.

c danchi (1/10)

chainsaw man (9/10)

i'll just leave this here and go on with my life.

GUYS. GUYS. IT'S FINALLY HERE. BABE'S FINALLY HERE. AND OH LORD SHE'S LOOKING AMAZING. i've been waiting for this series for so long, (since it first got announced like holy fuck the feels). i have the entire part one on my bookshelf and it brings me so much joy (and tears and trauma and—) to finally see it animated. the animation, the art, the music, the voices— everything is just fantastic, perfect even. the op is a banger and each and every ed is just so good (some better than others imo). i'm so happy mappa were the ones that took the project like omg thanks mappa but fr fr. if i'm not giving it a higher note is because i'm afraid that would be my inner fangirl speaking so yeah. my children look perfect, that's enough for me. and fuck those who complain about the cgi istg—

cool doji danshi (7/10)

just a pretty chill slice of life short series about a bunch of dorks trying to survive in the wild. they're all so relatable and idk what to think about it. babe's also pretty absent-minded, so this is pretty comfy to me... is this how #representation feels like? besides that, there's not much to say about it since it's just... that. they exist, and i'm happy they do.

do it yourself!! (5/10)

how many times have i said i don't like CGDCT series? many times, but i still go and watch them. why? because i'm dumb ig. it's just a series about a bunch of girls doing bricolage, that's pretty much it.

fumetsu no anata e 2 (8/10)

second season of "don't get attached to the cast because they're all going to die". at this rate, i think i'm made of stone because i haven't shead a tear in the entire series. i'm also getting use to the show's formula (introduce new character → make you feel attached to them → kill them), so ig that's also why i don't feel that sad anymore? idk, i do feel sad but not that sad yk. anyway, is as good as the first season so you should give it a try.

fuufu ijou, koibito miman. (6.5/10)

i started not liking the series (the male mc was annoying to me and i felt like he would only see the girls by their "personality"), but i ended up getting attached in some sort of way? it's an easy to watch, funny romcom that, even if it's nothing special, will entertain you for the time being.

kage no jitsuryokusha ni naritakute! (5.5/10)

i like the idea, but not the execution. i mean, kinda. it started being a parody of isekai series, but i feel like isekai is slowly but surely eating the show alive. i'm not that interested on the plot and the ecchi scenes and comments are... something. to give you some example: there was this scene where these girls would pose in ways others could check their breasts better and perceive them as bigger than their opponent's. or maybe the many comments they do about the protagonist's dick being a fricking sword????? umm not thank you.

koukyuu no karasu (7/10)

a historical fantasy shoujo series with interesting plot points and a cute romance?? hell yeah, count me in! each and every character is lovable af and trust me when i tell you you'll never get bored. the art is so cute and comfortable (idk how to explain it), and the romance is just... i just want them to date already, am i asking too much? definitely give it a chance.

mairimashita! iruma-kun 3 (8/10)

new iruma season and the first one i'm watching as it's coming out. the children are back and more chaotic than ever in this new arc (the best one yet, from what i heard). i just can't stress enough how this series makes me feel, how comfy it makes me feel. i've connected with the characters in such a way it just makes me smile every time each and every single one of them just appears on the screen. i'm so excited to see who'll win! (no spoilers please)

mob psycho 100 III (8.5/10)

this isn't the last season. no, i refuse to accept it. even though many characters are getting their closures and all this chaos is going on and every wish of them to have a happy life has turned to ash. this is not the end. and that never happened. no. just. leave me alone.

mushikaburi-hime (6/10)

so, they're trying to bring historical shoujos back and while we did get some interesting results (koukuuu no karasu), we also got series like mushikaburi-hime. the series is about a girl who is obssesed with books and a dude that isn't, but because he likes her he's up to deal with that little trait of hers. and... that's pretty much it. the series revolves around their relationship (which sometimes turns a bit toxic due to the male mc). the female mc hasn't progressed in over ten episodes, she won't progress now. if you're interested, there it is. but it's not a series i would recommend.

renai flops (7/10)

i said it before: i love shitshows. this one seemed to be a parody on ecchi, harem series which caught my eye. i mean, the first ep involves the dog scene which is one of the most bizarre scenes i've seen on any romcom. at first, i was gonna watch it for the laughs from how bad it all was, but then the second half happened and it changed my view on the series. from a parody that makes things absurd on purpose to something else. i would recommend anyone who's interested to watch it and please, do not spoil yourself.

shinobi no itokki (4/10)

this show is about a dude who goes to high school and he gets confessed to by a girl he doesn't know. only that it wasn't a confession but a trap, because that girl was a ninja and was trying to kidnap him. but he's able to runaway because he has all these ninja abilities that his mother forced him to learn and never questioned why. and then his mum tell him they're actually ninjas and now he has to go to this ninja school that's literally a high school building in the middle of nowhere like ????? i thought ninjas were discreet???? except no one cares about the school because then someone (don't ask, don't remember) gets betrayed and blames the dude's clan and shit happens and wth is going on????

spy x family part 2 (8.5/10)

part two of this very wholesome but also very fake family! their shenanigans are as crazy as they were in part one, and we got introduced to our queen, fiona. also, the main fake couple are growing closer due to the mission and i think that's pretty cool now get married for real this time.

tensei shitara ken deshita (6/10)

just your average isekai with better than average animation and a wholesome bond between both leads. besides that, i have no much to say about it. i absolutely adore fran and amanda, but the whole idea of fran being op almost from the start is frustrating. i wanna see her grow, but this left me kinda cold.

urusei yatsura (6.5/10)

many people were hyping this show, and i do understand why. after all, it's pretty rough fighting against nostalgia. still, even though the visuals are so cute and the op and ed are pretty good, it just shows the series it's an old one. the comedy falls flat at times along with some characters, although it's still enjoyable. i don't know if i'll keep on watching the second season, but for now i don't feel like dropping it.

uzaki-chan wa asobitai! ω (6/10)

so, uzaki is back. the first season has never been one of my favorites, but i decided to give the second season a try and watch it as it was coming out and... well, it's uzaki. for some of y'all it may be hilarious, but to me it's just fine. it's boring most of the time, although i do like the idea of the mcs dating (please do so for fuck's sake). if you're into this kind of comedy, you should give it a try.

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genezpen · 2 years

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waste it on me

pairing: idol!huening kai × gn!reader

genre: a very angsty one, fluff (hurt-comfort)

warnings: first person pov (reader’s), mention of anxiety/depression, foul words, aggressive hyuka, alternative universe, reader has trauma, softhearted¡reader, passing out, mention of hospital, mention of adoptive parents, etc.. (pls tell me if i missed something)

“why can’t you just trust me?” those words slipped off my tongue almost a whisper in the wind.

my palms against the bathroom door weakened as complete silence filled the room.

the door finally opened after a few minutes. there kai stood inside the bathroom, no trace of tears nor emotions in his eyes. it made my heart sunk.

“what did you say?” his chilly voice greeted me.

refusing to back down like i always do, i chose to step up this time.

“you don’t trust me enough.” i utter in a miserable but trying to hold on tone.

he just stood there staring at me like i was being ridiculous. “what made you think so? no, actually, i don’t wanna know. i’m tired of your drama everytime something happened to me at work, you always ALWAYS has to act like it’s your fucking business when it’s not.”

kai took a step forward which made me walk back a bit. his words shoot to kill that my chest felt so heavy, its like someone punch my thumping heart. he's never been this way, it hurts to the core, tears threatened to fall on my cheeks.

“give me a fucking break will you?” rolling his eyes, he then walked out of the room.

unable to process what just happened, i stood there for a moment frozen.

all i can do after he left is to collapse on the ground as my fist repeatedly punching my chest thinking this would lessen the unbearable pain i was feeling at the moment. tears felt like a water falls blurred my vision until everything went dark.

what happened to my huening?

“y/n, please, wake up already...” i heard a voice calling out to me.

my eyelids flutter as i open my eyes slowly and i was greeted by white walls. beside the bed is huening with his lips against the back of my right hand, eyes tightly closed as if muttering a prayer.

i moved a bit that made him glance at me with a hopeful look. his eyes widened when our gaze met, he panicked.

“babe! oh gosh– babe, are you alright?” kai stood up immediately and his palms landed on the top of my head caressing it gently. somehow, i feel safe and assured.

but what happened to me, why am i in the... hospital? i examined the room one more time before my eyes landed on my beloved boyfriend infront of me.

suddenly, memories from earlier flooded inside my head. i started trembling a bit, i didn’t want to but my body panicked. if it weren’t for huening, i would burst right there and then.

he held both of my hands tightly as he whispered 'i love yous' to my ears assuring me i’m safe in his arms. kai caress my cheek and kiss away my tears.

“i’m sorry... babe, i’m really sorry... forgive me, please...” he looked directly at me, eye to eye, with nothing but pure gentleness and apologies.

“why...” is the first word i muttered under my breath.

“hmm?” he indulge me to speak more never breaking our eye contact.

“d-do you not trust me, kai?” i manage to ask him in a weak manner.

his eyes widened at that. it’s like he couldn't believe i’m asking a ridiculous question.

“of course, i trust you! what made you think that way, babe? i have entrusted my entire life to you, only you...”

i bit my lower lip as i felt my heart booming inside my chest. it distracted his eyes for a bit before looking right back at me.

“then why? if you’re upset or mad about something, why can’t you waste it on me?” almost pleading.

huening rarely let me see that side of him, and i’m so willing to accept it as a whole because i love him unconditionally. but i feel like he doesn't want that.

after i said that, he couldn’t find a word to say. instead, he closed his eyelids slowly as he kissed my temple that made me close mine too. huening stayed like that for some time, never letting go of my cold palms, before his eyes met mine once again.

“why would i want to? do you not see how vulnerable you are to me? you can’t handle me in that situation, babe... i’d rather suffer alone than burden you more. you’ve suffered a lot. that’s already too much, don’t you think so?” so tender, he explained it.

i was reminded of how much i’ve suffered in the arms of my adoptive parents. it brought be trauma, and anxiety but that doesn’t mean i can’t be strong over time. that was years ago, i am not that weak anymore, i want huening to understand that too.

“b-but, you helped me through it and i’m really thankful for that. that’s why i-i want to take care of you this time, why won’t you let me? i’m not the weak y/n anymore, kai!” i could only beg. for him to see my reasons for once.

“you were there for me all the time. when i was at my lowest you didn’t give up on me, you cheered for me when i was at my very best because you said you love me!” this time, i was the one to grip his hands tightly as he’s only nodding at everything i say.

i look like a child wanting to take care of their parents’ problem because they don’t want to see them in a bad situation but as they were only a child, they couldn't really do something about it. it sucks.

“and- and i love you just the same, kai! i want to cherish every version of you, i will accept you as you are just like how you accepted me before. please, let me take care of you...” i cried.

he buried his face on the crook of my neck as i continue to desperately beg for him. i caress his hair gently as i weep.

after a moment of silence, i felt something wet against my collar and that’s when i realized huening was crying too.

little sobs came out of his lips as he hugged me tight, not letting me see his face.

“babe, i love you, too... so very much. gosh! i didn’t know i could fall for you ten times harder than i did before.” his husky tone indicates that he strained his voice trying not to sob louder.

“from now on, i’ll make sure to show you all of me. will you be able to handle upset kai? i don’t want to hurt you in anyway–” he murmurs still not looking at me.

“shh! i said i’m a lot more stronger now. trust me, please.” i pouted.

i felt him smile then bit his lips against my neck.

“of course, i trust you, baby.”

y’all :( no wc available since i wrote it here on tumblr thinking i could just copy it then transfer it to my notes but i cannot. i hope you like this tho ! this is my first txt fic/drabble. tnx n love lots, bff's <3 (don’t be shy to interact/ send asks pls im so lonely in this app :<)

ps. i hope hyuka don’t have to suffer alone now coz he has his members on his side :) i wrote this thinking about the time he usually go to the bathroom to cry alone rather than showing it to other trainees !")#+$?*@-( he’s so strong i wanna hug him 🥺

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matthewmoorwood · 1 year

Text

They really did name this Ep love is in the air and expected me not to be on my clown shit huh.

Everytime I see Athena I just. Feel things. She is so strong hhnngs

HA THAT DUDE IS MANGLED!! this is what u get for fucking skydiving.

SHE WAS GONNA BREAK UP WITH HIM HA HA

THE A+ SIDE YOU ARE SO RIGHT RAVI, can they fucking say his name right please??

RAVI IS A BUISNESS MAN, and the only functional adult of the entire 118, literally the only guy with his shit together

Maddie and Chimney is going to shatter all of my bones. I fucking love them so much and I cannot bear seeing either of them hurt.

SHE FOUND THE RING HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

wait why am I watching Eddie go on clearly shitty dates, like he went golfing?? obviously that is not gonna work out babe golf is the devils sport. OH HA ALL OF THEM ARE ALREADY IN RELATIONSHIPS GET FUCKING WRECKED this is what you get for trying to date whilst being in love with someone else

Maddie being enchanted with the ring is so fucking cute please IT GOT STUCK ASDFHSJDFBASFHASFKLHFGSJALF

buck get the fuck out of that date I hate everything what the fuck. they are not going to revive this Lucy thing? are they? jesus christ.

The claws are out ajfkadsfd

Bro? can they? let the horse go? please?

"you have to let me choose love" babe? you could be bleeding out internally??

Buckley siblings plz. they are so <3

A RING CUTTER BUCK PLEASE KEEP YOUR KINKY SHIT OUT OF THE DAMM KITCHEN

Nah dude Hen is about to be murdered by Maddie ansdlfka

Bobby going after Eddie for dating bc he knows Eddie is already dating someone.

This is a very fucking suspicious woman... though she does seem like genuinely upset, but something about the way Athena is investigating is just a little odd

Ella is disassociating so bad, me too girl, me too.

OK nvm Ella is not evil, and damm Athena gives good advice.

Low empathy makes watching this very awkward, bro I am not involved in your story I literally do not care about Ella, like okay he died?

HOLY SHIT MALEWIFE BUCK

OH GOD TAYLOR?

anyway Lucy is not coming back thank god but this is just reminding me of how fucking insanse bucks relationships are ashfadsfa

Chimney girl why are you trauma dumping on this insurance worker plz

Maddie plz don't beat up hen, i am so scared.

This is a very intense conversation for my abandonment issues.

ok thank god they are not fighting,.

BUck your slut is showing he isn't actually a slut he just falls far too hard far too often

I actually forgot about sperm donor buck ajajas I was like ?? another ??

I AM SO TIRED OF PEOPLE SAYING THEY UNDERSTAND AND SEE BUCK AND THEN PROCEED TO FIND HIM "TOO MUCH" LIKE SIR.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MADDIE PROPOSED FIRST THANK GO D THIGNDSKFHASOFDASAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA i AM LOSING MY FUCKING SHITTTTTTTT

"is there anything you want for your anniversary, aside from dinner?"

"How about you just hold me, and never let go."

YOU CANNOT SAY SHIT LIEK THAT MY BLOOD PRESSUREE??

hmmmm symbolism of Buck constantly giving up his space/comfort for the benefit of others. hmmm.

Okay ep over, I am literally to autistic to be let near this damm show. Like why is this one of my special interests??? idk. but I'll take it.

#9-1-1 on fox #9-1-1 on abc #9-1-1 s6e17 #liveblogging

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greyeyedmonster-18 · 2 years

Note

Grey! Trauma anon or something, back again - this time with a finished not-really-a-review but a bunch of words from the heart:

First and foremostly, Mrs. Potter knowing how Sirius takes his tea and that he prefers peppermint.

The way Sirius “misses” his parents, still, because it’s complicated and there’s no such thing as a clean break. His stance towards Regulus and how he said Remus could never beat him in a duel, yes. The painting.

The way he’s always trying so hard and still gets knocked down sometimes. I distinctly remember writing in my journal one day that I always felt like I didn’t just take a couple steps backwards every once in a while, but that I plummet down, I hit rock bottom and go right back to where I don’t want to be and have to make my way back up again. And again and again. So you can imagine how I felt when he expressed that.

(Babe I just now realised there’s no possible way for me to make this review chronologically, I’ll just hope my best it doesn’t give you whiplash).

It is actually so cute that Peter reads with his hands covering his ears??

When Sirius lit Remus’s blunt with his own cigarette, that did something.

I just want you to know this entire fic felt like a love song to Sirius, I adore him so much. Sirius with a grin, bargaining with a professor for 5 minutes at the Ravenclaw table. Sirius with spirit, giving James a pep talk before quidditch matches and holding him by his scruff whenever Lily’s around - and how he empathises later on, when he realises he wants to do with Remus what James does when he’s around Lily.

The way Sirius thinks he’s inherently insane because of some Black family madness, like they’re the Targaryens or something. I wonder that way too often too. Whether I’m wired or I was just brought up that way doesn’t really matter, because it is a part of me now anyway. And I try everyday to do better, but all of the darkness, it is still me, too. So I actually liked Porter but I hated the way he only wanted the filtered version of Sirius and how he claimed the bits he didn’t like weren’t really him anymore. I love that he realised he wanted someone who loved him unconditionally. I love how all of this makes him hold on to stability and how much Remus appreciates that, especially in the mornings after the full moon.

Sirius beating Mulciber’s fucking face in was just what he (Sirius) deserved, really. Good for him. The flashback to his conversation with McGonagall did hurt though, but in a good way. “We’re just gonna sit here and you’ll have my attention, shall you want it” plEASE i literally teared up and i’m not someone who cries, ever. If someone had said that to me, I would have.

I love that it was Mr. Potter who reached out to him first, about the incident and about the watch. I love that Mrs. Potter grounded him and that that was his something good of the day. And I love that he was able to write with his left hand lmao. And Lily’s pipeline from “man who does tables” to “show me how you set up your tables”.

Polyglot Sirius is canon! English, French, Greek, Latin and Italian and YES!! And James speaking Urdu, so true, bestie.

Actually, make that polymath Sirius. He’s so perceptive and clever and I love the idea of him being knowledgeable in multiple fields (languages, music, arithmancy, etc). The fact he has a red quill for revising James’s papers. Your honOUR i love this mess of a man!!

Also the way Sirius evidently struggles to converse with parental figures and the way he makes himself scarce when he doesn’t know how to communicate and/or emote. How the poshness sometimes comes out and how James and Remus tease him for it (and, on that note, all of Lily’s impressions, I love her dearly). The way he always straightens his posture before taking on anything - from answering a question in class to approaching a serious conversation. It is so dear the way he’s conscious about it too and makes sure to let himself relax when he’s alone with Remus on their ledge.

James and Sirius calling each other “love”. James hating that Sirius smokes and sometimes actively removing a cigarette from his mouth. When the Potters got him the piano for Christmas I was so touched. The flashback from the night he showed up on their doorstep and James being absolutely feral - if you don’t want two sons i’ll go! but he stays! and he gets all the blankets!! Also the marauders’s party for Sirius on his birthday. Being known really is being loved!!

The way Sirius is just so blatantly beautiful that it is nothing but a fact to everyone and nothing to brag about. Yeah, the sky is blue and Sirius is handsome. I love that his attractiveness is not perceived as his greatest attribute, barely as an attribute at all. That he’s aware it draws people in superficially and how he struggles with intimacy because he wants to be more than just a pretty face. I love that his friends use his good looks to make fun of him, rather than placing it on a pedestal. Remus is allowed to gush, though.

Ok, back up, I just recalled they don’t heal all of their injuries after the full moon (and that Remus is not the only one that gets hurt! please!) because some make them look cool. They’re such boys, bless them.

My body spasmed every single time Remus called Sirius a good boy.

All of Sirius’s trauma dumping and using humour as a coping mechanism… yes. That is realistic. Also his hair growing as the story progresses and the way Remus blames the heat in their compartment on Sirius’s shampoo. Oh! AND! Sirius was uninterested in smoking if Remus wasn’t there. Remus and his hand-rolled cigarettes, the pretentious hipster (this is a self call-out). He gets a pass for teaching (albeit not so successfully) Sirius how to roll them. That’s how I flirt too, Remus. And I know he was flirting because no one who wasn’t flirting would just let someone ruin like three rolling papers.

Marlene!! Is precious. I love how much she cares, I love that she bet on “idiot” only once and I love that she reassures Sirius he won’t fuck things up. I wish he’d gotten to see more of them. Strip quidditch and setting firewhisky shots on fire and stuff.

The fact he distinguished his mother’s footsteps from every other sound in the castle is just. spot on. “Mother didn’t ask me a question” walked so “There’s no need to call me sir, Professor” could run.

By the point they share a bed and he-who-never-shares Remus is like take my hand, wreck my plans, that’s my man – and Sirius fucking does!!! takes his hand and rests it on the underside of his cheek. For safekeeping. And Remus not showering in the morning for the chance that he might smell Sirius on him throughout the day?? I love Remus and his mismatched socks and I love that he keeps extra hair ties on his wrist for Sirius.

Sirius organises his sock drawer and shoves people’s faces into walls!! The rANGE! And yeah, this is my mess of a review that is more of me yelling at you about things you already know (cause you wrote the damn thing) but I just wanted to show my appreciation and to tell you how much I’ve enjoyed reading every single word of it! Thank you so much for choosing to share it with us <3

I will be leaving you alone now, mwah!!

....anon. it is blurry, it is misty, a tree landed in both my eyes.

I--

have no words to express how...lovely this review is and how delighted i am that you picked up on every single thing i was trying to articulate (trouble with parental figures, his mothers footsteps, this inherent question of "am i born to be cruel or do i actually have a choice?", posture and mannerisms and the way he speaks, sirius's fluidity--charming,broken,excited,brilliant--all of these things and attempting to reconcile). I just--from the bottom of my heart thank you for reading. Thank you for taking the time to express this. I read this ask like 8x because i was so astounded

(and i also thought literally no one on this earth was going to like or understand this fic and would HATE the writing of sirius and i am...so...relieved? Flattered? Surprised?? That hasnt been the case).

So much love.

#asks #grey answers #no matter the wreckage

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wildernessuntothemselves · 2 years

Note

The only two cents I will be giving about the trigger warning discussion is that taking any ideia to the extreme is not good. What I mean by that is that simply being pro or con the use of warnings, without taking context and other nuances in consideration can be dangerous.

Being completely against trigger warnings and simply disregarding the effect of what you put online can have on others, is just being irresponsible and causing a lot of unnecessary stress for others that happen to be wondering online. On the other side, trying to be overly wary of everything and anything that could possibly trigger or even cause the slightest bit of unrest to someone is, honestly, near impossible - the variety of things peoples fears and traumas can relate to are infinite, and no one could possibly dodge mentioning all of them.

I am not saying that your arguments are in favor of one of those extreme (you have been relatively moderate in your responses). It is however important to remind ourselves to not be so black and white when dealing with those matters, cause when we start reproducing a set idea on automatic, without giving some thought to context, that's when we make the most damage.

I also am aware that you work in the medical field, and so you are probably way more desensitized to bodily fluids and gore-ish elements in general (it comes with the job, that's normal). When something becomes comum on our day to day it can be difficult to remember how much the mere mention or display of an image with it can affect others. I deal with suicide, child abuse and sexual violence on a daily and constantly have to remind myself that despite the fact that me and my coworkers talk about those things unceremoniously (because we have to) among ourselves, for a lot of people those things are taboo, nearly unspeakable, and can be very triggering.

You most probably had no ill intentions, and some of the points you made in your responses make a lot of sense. I am not nagging at you or anything like that. But I also do agree that blood is a fairly common trigger, and maybe in this case it would be better to put a warning or switching the picture for something more campy where blood doesn't look like blood at all (like in 1977's Suspiria where the blood is straight up pink).

Don't stress too much about it, please.

~♡anon

Thank you for giving your two cents babe. It's always appreciated when an expert on the topic gives their thoughts.

As I have said I definitely understand the use of trigger warnings for specific things, and while yes I work in trauma and see horrific things all the time, I'm perfectly aware that things like bones breaking out of your skin or splattered brains aren't something the average person would be okay with seeing and if my picture had been graphic in an even much lesser extent than this, I would’ve put it under the cut from the start.

Again I understand blood itself is triggering to some but I believe it falls under the umbrella of such things like spiders, snakes, etc. Things that could potentially be triggering to a subset of people, but in of themselves they aren't distributing.

Anyway I will probably include a "tw blood" in the future for such images so it could be filtered out for people but those are my opinions on the topic.

#mort talks

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sugarbooger513 · 3 years

Text

JJK Men x Insecure chubby Fem!reader

Today has been hard to think of myself positively, and I have friends who struggle with the same thing, so I thought I could indulge some people with some very loved characters reminding us that, no matter our size, we're perfect.

Characters: Satoru Gojo, Toji Fushiguro, Choso Kamo, Kento Nanami

Warnings: Insecurities, body dysphoria, Toji's gets spicy (sue me), suggestive at the end of Nanami's, tooth rotting fluff.

Satoru Gojo

- Let's be completely honest here, this man rarely feels insecure, if he ever does.

- He wouldn't be able to sympathize, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care. In fact, it makes him care a lot more.

- His comfort methods aren't for everyone either, so be prepared. He's trying, give him that.

- Humor. That's what this man knows. Iykyk, this man deflects any form of trauma with his humor.

- If he notices it isn't working, then he'll come up with something else because he loves you. That love tells him that he has to try.

"Oh sweetie pie, I'm home!" Satoru's voice carries easily through the house, but you can't seem to care at the moment. Your cheeks still feel somewhat sticky from the tears that have fallen the past thirty minutes.

"Honey bun? I said I-" His voice cuts off, and you know you're caught. The bed shifts where your boyfriend lowers himself beside you. "Y/N, why are you crying?"

"I-I don't want to talk about it, Satoru." He removes his blindfold with a small chuckle. "Did your favorite anime character die?" "No." "You sure? You tend to sob when-" "I said I don't want to talk about it."

He freezes at the way you lash out at him. Yeah, something is actually wrong.

"Love," his voice softens in a way that shows how worried he is, "is there anything I can do to help? Anything at all?" You're quiet for a minute, but you eventually scoot closer to him.

"You want me to hold you?" All you manage is a nod before more tears slide down your cheeks. His long arms encase you securely against him. "I can do that as long as you need. I'm here for you, Y/N."

The two of you stay like that, you crying softly into his uniform while he runs his hand up and down your back.

Eventually, your sobs turn into small sniffles, and you finally speak. "I.. I'm sorry for snapping at your earlier, Sato." He smiles at the loving nickname. "No, baby, I'm sorry for joking around. You wanna talk about it now?"

"I just... I was thinking about.. how many girls looks so much better than I do." He scoffs. "You're kidding, right?" "Sato.." "No, I mean that. It isn't a joke. Baby, we've been through this since day one. I. Want. You."

You hide your now blushing face against his chest. "But.. I just don't understand.." "Look at me, baby." When you do, his bright blue eyes seem to shimmer. "You're the love of my life. You're gorgeous, stunning, beautiful, and every other synonym to those that I'll have to get Nanami to teach me because I will remind you everyday until it gets through your thick ass skull."

His hand comes up to rest on your chubby cheek, where he starts to wipe away the drying tears. "I. Love. You. So. Freaking. Much. Y/N." Each word is punctuated with a kiss on a different part of your face, until he eventually meets your lips.

The small giggles you let out makes him smile. "There's that beautiful laugh! Come on, why don't I pop some popcorn and we go watch whatever you want on the TV?" Your shit eating grin makes him snort a bit of laughter. "Even if it ends in a favorite character dying?"

"I don't mind having to hold you a bit longer."

Toji Fushiguro

- This is also someone I don't think can really empathize with you and your insecurities.

- However, when this man falls he falls HARD

- He will do anything in his power to make you feel better.

- Well

- Anything he can do while still seeming nonchalant about it

- Lets talk about how this man would take matters into his own hands, with his own hands, to make sure you know how loved you are. (You couldn't have expected just fluff with him, give me a break y'all.)

"Y/N," Toji kicks his shoes off carelessly at the door, "I'm home." He raises a confused eyebrow when he looks around the house. Plates from your movie night yesterday lay strewn about the coffee table, still.

'She never leaves dishes out. That's weird.'

He starts to walk around the house, worry filling his chest. It just isn't like you to leave a mess, or to not greet him at the door. There's no way someone came and did something to you, right? No one is THAT dumb, surely.

When he hears the small sniffles coming from your shared bedroom, he breathes a small sigh of relief. "Y/N? I'm coming in." He pushes the bedroom door open to see you cuddling his pillow while laying on your side.

His eyes widen at the sight of your body trembling from the small sobs. "Y/N?" He walks around the bed to kneel in front of you. "What happened?"

"N-Nothing Toji. Sorry, I-I know the house is a w-wreck." "Shut up about the damn house. I don't care. Why are you crying?"

You finally sit up, which lets him sit beside you on the bed. "I just.. Bad day." "Who do I need to stab?" "T-Toji?! You can't solve everything by stabbing!" He shrugs a bit. "You can try."

He smiles sweetly when you slap his arm. "That isn't funny." "Hmmm, but it made your cheeks flush." "Toji Fushiguro!" "Alright, alright. You wanna tell me what's wrong now?"

"I just.. looked in a mirror for too long, babe. Don't worry about-" "I'm lost. What do you mean you looked in one for too long?" You sigh, knowing he hates vague answers.

"My body is disgusting me today, Toji." He scrunches his eyebrows and leans in a bit closer to you. Your face heats up from the slight glare in his eyes.

"Looks the same to me." "Toji, I-" "Correct yourself." His already deep voice seems to drop even lower. Your entire body trembles. "S-Sir."

"Good girl. Now, let me get this straight. You don't think you're attractive." You shake your head, suddenly feeling the tears come back to your eyes. "Why not?" "J-Just.. my body.. it isn't.." "Skinny?" The word hurts your heart, but you nod, knowing he expects some sort of answer.

"So? You're exactly what I need, Y/N." You glance up to meet his loving gaze. "N-need?" "Don't play dumb. You know I need you. Now, we have to fix those insecurities."

He stands, offering his hand out to you. When you take it, he pulls you to your feet.

"Now," he groans as he lays back down on the bed, "I've had a tiring day at work. I want you to strip and come take a seat." "A-a seat?" His smirk tells you what you need to know before he elaborates. "I AM rather starved. Come on, I'm pretty impatient."

"To-Sir, I'm too.." "Heavy? Try again. You aren't getting out of this." He snaps his fingers, and the sound runs deep into your core. His eyes watch you hungrily as you start to get out of your pants.

"Now, for every one of your orgasms, I want to hear 'I'm Toji's pretty princess.' Understand?" "Y-yes sir."

You have no idea what posses you, but you finally let out you own witty comment. "You could at least take me to dinner first."

"You cheeky brat, don't worry. I have plans for your meal."

Hope you don't mind being hoarse for a while. You had to repeat just how pretty you were a number of times.

Choso Kamo

- SWEETEST MOTHER FUCKER I SWEAR

- He doesn't see a single flaw in you, honestly.

- Plus, he doesn't really understand beauty standards. All he knows is he loves every inch of you.

- Nothing goes unloved by this big ass baby.

- You crying would probably bring him to tears because he feeds off your emotion.

- But there is no doubt this man will do anything and everything to see your smile again.

- A true king who just wants his queen as happy as she makes him.

He left you for maybe an hour. Maybe. Choso just had to run and pick up a movie from Yuji.

"Angel, Yuji said that we have to-" He drops the movie the instant he sees tears in your eyes. "L-love? What happened?"

He rushes to your side and wastes no time wrapping you in his strong embrace. Your hands grip his shirt in a feeble attempt to pull him closer.

"What happened? Do you need something? A doctor?" His eyes are scanning your body for any signs of pain. His hands running gently over your back, arm, sides, but everything seems normal.

"I-I'm okay, Cho." "No, you aren't. Please, angel, don't lie to me." His own eyes start to fill with tears, but he tries to will them away. He knows he shouldn't be crying, but seeing you in any pain hurts him just as much.

"Cho, I just.. It's stupid." His large hands cup your face so you're forced to meet his eyes. "Nothing that makes you cry is stupid. Absolutely nothing, my love."

"I.. I tried to put on a hoodie of yours because I was cold." He blinks in confusion. "Was.. was it dirty?" "No I.. I stretched it out.." he tilts his head.

"Is that all?" You nod, but even more tears come to your eyes. "I just hate how big I am.. I thought you would find it cute to come home and see me in your clothes but.. I just messed them up.." He stands, suddenly walking into the kitchen. "C-Cho?"

"I bought some of your favorite ice cream. You know, the kind you always crave on your period. I figure we can cuddle and you can enjoy it while we watch a movie."

"I- I don't really want anything to eat." He smiles, still grabbing it and a spoon. "I know, but just in case. Listen," he places the carton on the table next to you, "you're gorgeous. Every part of you just screams beauty. Nothing could ever change that. Not your size, not you stretching out a stupid hoodie, not you crying, nothing."

He opens the carton, only to get a spoonful out and kneel in front of you. "Open up, angel." You do as he says and allow him to feed you the ice cream. You can't help but smile as you eat it.

His index finger wipes a few old tears from your cheeks. "There's that smile I love. Now, I think we need a movie and some cuddles. How does that sound?" You can only nod, absolutely floored by how much Choso truly loves you.

No more negative thoughts came to your mind while you laid against his chest. He even took a few times to feed you more ice cream throughout the movie.

Oh yeah, he totally bought new hoodies in a bigger size so you could wear them around the house without fear of stretching them.

Kento Nanami

- KING ENERGY

- You can't tell me this man doesn't want someone who acts as his pillow. Come on.

- That being said, Nanami knows how it is to be insecure.

- Whether it's over body insecurity or not, that can be argued either way. Still, insecurities aren't something he's ignorant about.

- On days where you can't seem to like your body, he'll do whatever you need.

- Need to be alone? No problem. Need someone to talk to you? Covered. Just need to be told you're loved? He'll tell you as many times as it takes.

- However, he can't help but be blunt. That's just who he is.

- He does it out of love for you, though. He never wants you to believe something that isn't true.

It's really hard for you and Nanami to get the same day off of work, and today was no different. Since you were the one working today, Nanami decided to take up cleaning the house and preparing dinner. He would also insist on doing the dishes, but he knew better. You never allow him to do all of the work.

He watched the clock hit five thirty and smiled. No doubt, that was your car he heard pull into the driveway. Now that you were home, he could surprise you by telling you that he managed to get the next five days off, which matched your schedule.

The front door opens, and he's quick to call out a "Welcome home, dear. Dinner will be done soon." He turns his body, preparing to catch you in his embrace as usual. However, all that happens is you call back, "Thanks, Ken."

His eyebrows furrow, and he quickly takes dinner off the stove so he can go check on you. He's not one to forget anniversaries or anything like that, so his mind is going through any possible reason you just called him Ken.

"Bad day at work, dear?" He wipes his hand on his apron as he comes around the corner. You were already sitting on the couch, eyes on your phone. "Yeah, I guess." "Okay," he sighs and sits beside you, "would you like to talk about it?" When you finally look at him, his eyes widen. Your eyes are puffy, as if you had been crying.

"Y/N.." "It's just coworker drama, Ken, don't worry too much about it." He scrunches his face. Those women you work with always pissed him off. He's noticed them staring at him whenever he brings you lunch. "Well, humor me a bit. What happened today?"

He just knows you can't resist gossiping with him after a work day. "I-I don't want to repeat it, Ken." The worried look in his eyes makes you whimper. "What?"

"I'm not used to you calling me 'Ken' at home." "Sorry, honey. It's nothing you did." He smiles softly and reaches to cup one of your cheeks in his hand. "Are you sure you don't want to tell me?" You do. God, you do because you know you'll cry again and he'll be here to hold you through it.

"They started talking about you." "Me?" "Yeah," you look at your hands, already feeling your chest tighten, "and started laughing at how you're.. settling for someone who is as big as I am.."

Nanami's soft looks suddenly turns harsh. How dare they say stuff like that? What's worse is he's sure they knew you could hear them!

"Really?" When you nod, a tear falls onto your lap. "It just.. really hurt knowing that I'm not the only one who thinks that." "Y/N.." He pulls you into a hug with a soft sigh.

"Don't think like that. Dear, if I wanted anything different than what I have now, you would know it." You sigh and cuddle into his warm embrace. "I know, but-" "But nothing, my love. I love you, only you, forever you. Do you understand?" You glance up and he places a soft kiss on your forehead.

"Yeah.. I love you too, Kento." "I have an idea." "Uh huh?" His smirk has you worried. "Well, we both have the next five days off.." "We do?!"

The excitement in your voice has him chuckling. "There's my pretty laugh. Yes, we do. I'm thinking on your first day back.. you go in with a ring on your finger."

You blink in confusion. "K-Kento, you don't-" "Oh I do. Am I the person to joke about wanting to marry you?" Your eyes start to fill, yet again, with tears. However, these tears make Nanami also tear up a bit.

"Are you... asking..?" "I have a ring just for you in my suit jacket, Y/N. Just say you'll marry me." He isn't really expecting you to jump on him, so when you do, he falls from the couch to the floor. "You know I'll marry you, Ken!"

The two of you share a long kiss, complete with tears and laughter. "Well, now that that's decided. I think we should get a head start on something." "What would that be?"

He stands before securing you in his arms bridal style. "The Prehoneymoon." "That isn't a thing, honey." He smirks before playfully smacking your ass. "For you, Mrs. Nanami, anything is possible."

@katgalle @savonline

#jjk headcanons #nanami kento x y/n #toji fushiguro x reader #choso x reader #satoru gojo x reader #nanami fluff #toji fluff #choso fluff #gojo fluff

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generallybarzy · 3 years

Text

If You'll Have Me Forever.

an: this is the little fic i decided to write based on a dream i had. I wrote it all in one day while I was at my grandparent's house with no internet or computer, so i wrote it all in my notebook and then typed it up on here haha.

warnings: unedited, mentions of past emotional trauma and unhealthy families

word count: 1.7k

You always loved spending time with Mat's family. Whenever there was a break in the season, you two quickly found yourselves on a plane out to Vancouver, holding hands in the airplane and in the car on the way to his parent's house.

It had been like this since your first summer with them. Mat had invited you home with him for part of the offseason, and although you'd only been dating almost a year and were still nervous to meet his family, you couldn't say no. His family had welcomed you warmly, in fact, warm may not even be good enough to describe it. His parents smiled as soon as they saw you- saw you holding their son's hand, saw him smile proudly as he finally introduced you to them as his girlfriend.

Then, they hugged you.

You hadn't come from a loving family, not one where you openly told each other "I love you" or "I'm proud of you", and certainly not one that hugged and had family game nights. After much discussion with Mat and with your therapist, you came to the conclusion that your family had been borderline emotionally neglectful, and you saw how your childhood had scarred you. Mat's family was so openly affectionate and loving towards you right off the bat that it overwhelmed you, to the point of you going upstairs and refusing to come down until Mat had a talk with you. He was understanding, gently told them to be a little more reserved, and helped to slowly ease you into their love. And that just made you love him even more.

Now, it was your first holiday season with them. After spending a good chunk of last summer in Vancouver, you were certainly excited to spend a few days of your winter here with them rather than in your empty little apartment. You and Mat had flown out the night before, and arrived early in the morning, grateful that the team had managed a few extra days off this season- just enough days to make a trip worth it. The whole day had been spent talking and laughing and just catching up with his family about the past year- how things were going with your studies, with your job, how Mat’s season was going, and how your relationship was going. Later in the evening, after a long round of some board game they’d pulled from the closet, the jet lag and overwhelming, unfamiliar feeling of familial love caught up to you. So, in the middle of preparing some snacks to munch on during the next round of the game, you faked a phone call and quickly excused yourself to the snowy back patio, slipping into your coat and snow boots on the way and disappearing out the door.

Mat had been keeping a close eye on you all night.

He knew how you got about affection, you were even still a little shy receiving love from him, and the last thing he wanted to do was let him or his family overwhelm you again. He had gone to talk with his dad for five minutes- about a topic that had him immediately searching for you to go hide away and get some much needed alone time- and when he came back to the living room, you weren’t where he left you with his mom and sister.

“Where’s (Y/N)?”

“Oh,” his mom looked up from preparing the food. “She stepped out back to take a phone call.”

“Yeah?” Mat snuck over to the backdoor, squinting out into the snow and spotting your figure, no phone in sight. He slipped on a pair of shoes and grabbed his jacket from next to the door. “I think the jetlag might be stting in. I’ll be right back.”

He stepped out onto the back patio, the snow crunching beneath his fluffy slippers. You didn’t even turn when you heard the door close behind him, and that’s how he knew something was wrong.

“Baby… what are you doing out in the cold?” He came up next to you, curling an arm over your shoulders. “Were they too much? Should I tell them to back off a bit?” Finally, you turned to face him. Your eyes were wet and red, but you had a soft little smile on your face. “Aw, baby.”

“I love them so much, Mat.”

“C’mere.” He pulled you against his chest, rubbing his hands up and down your cold arms. You curled your arms around his waist, snuggling in under his winter jacket. “Babe, you should be wearing something heavier out here. I don’t want you getting sick.” Still, you stayed where you were, tucked into his jacket with him and hiding away from the snow and the world. “I’m glad you love my family so much. I hope you can tell they love you too. And if they’re too much, I’ll tell them, okay?”

“I know.”

“Just let me know. I know how you get uncomfortable when you receive this much love, but I hope you know you deserve it, okay? You’re absolutely amazing.” At his words, you lifted your face from the comfort of his chest, eyes red and face hot, streaked with tears. Snowflakes melted on impact, and Mat’s thumb brushed away the wetness. “Please don’t cry, baby.”

“I’m just… so overwhelmed. In the best way possible, I promise.”

“That’s good.”

“And I’m getting sleepy.”

“Jetlag finally catching up to you?” You nodded, burrowing back into the warmth of his jacket. He smiled, squeezing you against him. “Let’s go to bed, yeah, sweetheart?”

“Nooooo, I just wanna stay like this.”

“Okay, okay.” He smiled and lifted his hands in mock surrender. “We’ll stay out here for a little, but we gotta go in when you get cold.” Mat knew the reason you didn’t want to go back inside yet. One, because you didn’t want to cry in front of his family, but also because after spending the whole day with them, you were starved of sweet, gentle moments like this, alone with Mat. He knew you loved his family, but God, how you loved him. You’d been holding back all your hugs and kisses today, keeping low on the PDA in front of his family, and you’d gotten needy. He pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to his parents, saying the two of you were gonna be done for the night and wanted a little alone time, and he knew they’d understand and head to bed. The snow was picking up now, so Mat put his phone back in his pocket and pulled you with him against the wall of the house, your arms tucked under his fuzzy coat and holding tight around his waist, watching the snow fall and enjoying the comforting silence of the world.

“Do you know how much people love you?”

“Mat…” You smiled and hid your face shyly.

“No, do you know? Everyone who meets you falls a little bit in love with you. Everyone. You just have this… this loveable nature to you/ You’re the sweetest, kindest, most amazing person I know.” You didn’t respond, but Mat saw the smile on your face and felt the way your arms squeezed around his torso. “Remember how earlier, I was talking to my dad? You know what he was saying? He said ‘the way you look at (Y/N), that’s how I looked at your mom’. And how he still does.” That got your attention, and you lifted your face to look at him, at the pretty, genuine love in his dark eyes. “Hey, there’s that pretty face!” Your hands slid further up his back, and you perched up on your tiptoes, reaching up for a soft kiss that Mat gladly met you halfway for. “I’m serious when I say I love you, okay?”

“I know.”

“I get that you didn’t have the best relationship with your family, and they weren’t the healthiest, especially when it came to showing these types of emotions, but I’m gonna make sure you get used to it. Cause you’re gonna be in my life for a long, long time.”

“Forever?”

“If you’ll have me forever.”

Everything went silent, save for the soft falling of snow, at that whispered promise. The tears filled your eyes again, just so, so happy that you had someone like Mat in your life, and that he was so understanding and patient with you.

“If you’ll have me forever, my family would be more than happy to call you one of us. You could spend all your birthdays, holidays, and celebrations here, and they’d love you. I’d love you. I do. You’d never feel unloved again, if you’ll have me forever.”

“Mat are... Are you proposing?”

He shook his head quickly. “No. Not yet, not officially. Just take this as a… warning.”

You laughed a little bit. “A warning, Mat?”

“No, ugh… um, how about a promise. Yeah, a promise. A promise that if you’ll have me forever, I’ll do nothing but show you how damn loveable you are. I know I can’t erase the years of pain… God, or the trauma that your family put you through, but I promise you I’m gonna try my hardest. You deserve so much better than what they’d given to you, and I’ll give that to you.” Mat saw the tears in your eyes and swooped down to kiss your cheeks repeatedly. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to make you cry, baby.” He could say so, so much more, but he wanted to take care of you first. “Enough of my sappy rambling, yeah? My toes are freezing. Can we go in?” He saw you glance down at his feet and immediately started giggling.

“Nice slippers, grandpa.”

“They’re cozy.” He grinned, happy to see you smiling again. He had grabbed his dad’s shoes to come out, knowing you found his silly dad-fashion funny. “Now, let’s get to bed, sleepyhead.” He pulled you back into the warm, quiet house and led the way up to his bedroom, happy to finally have some time to just cuddle up under the blankets along with you. But as you fell asleep, tucked safely in his arms with a content, peaceful smile, he could fall asleep along with you. Instead, he lay there, watching you for hours, his thoughts filled with his dad’s words from earlier and quietly, secretly, he was writing long lines of phrases he wanted to say to you, phrases that would one day become part of his proposal.

I promise I’ll keep you safe, I promise I’ll keep you smiling and loved... if you’ll have me forever.

#mat barzal #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal fic #op #fic

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