#sorry for putting this whole ass essay in the tags but thanks to anyone who reads it

[inabottlelikelightning]

10 fandoms, 10 characters, 10 tags :)

got tagged in this a While ago (@grenadinepeach thank u <3 <3 <3) and i thought i’d give it a shot since i’ve been in Quite a few fandoms

rules: show us your ten favorite characters from ten fandoms and then tag ten people to do the same.

1. theo raeken — teen wolf

yeah this can’t be a surprise to anyone. this man somehow inspired me enough to actually Start Writing. absolutely wild. love him to death. bamf dumbass. also it doesn’t hurt that he looks Like That.

honorable mentions: allison, lydia, kira. (sorry liam)

2. steve rogers — marvel

some of you may not know this about me but i was into marvel for Quite Some Time. i have to say 💓💗💖💞💝💘💕steve rogers 💞💓💗💖💕 in both the mcu and 616. and, like. avengers assemble. there is just something so.. [chefs kiss] about someone who has suffered So Much and still strives to just be a really good fucking person. i could write a whole essay on this mf. i love him a lot

honorable mentions: peter parker (SUCH a close second, not mcu because Yikes but aaaa 616 peter my beloved), peggy carter, miles morales, natasha romanoff

3. arthur ?????

i have seen inception an unspeakable amount of times and the most interesting thing is the Crumbs of information we have about all of the characters. he’s resourceful, he’s competent, he’s a great dresser. 10/10 don’t know anyone else who could take down a hotel full of men in a three piece suit with spontaneous changes in gravity. like godDAMN that’s attractive.

honorable mentions: i mean. there are only 7 total characters so, like.. eames i guess??

4. minerva mcgonagall — harry potter

oh MAN she was the Original bamf. screamed every time she came onscreen/on the page because i knew shit was about to go down. the only unproblematic character, and the only one fandom hasn’t absolutely Ruined. an accidental gem in the series, there’s no way joanne knew what she was doing here

honorable mentions: luna lovegood, neville longbottom, remus lupin

5. magnus bane — shadowhunters (TV)

okay so i just watched this series and good GOD it was so much better than the books. i felt like in the books magnus was always sidelined but the show really let him shine in all his warlock glory. absurdly powerful + very nice blazers + kickass eyeliner + amazing jewelry + cat dad + disgustingly kind + adopts various individuals as children as he goes through life because 💖💕💓💗found family💕💓💗💘. bisexual poc king. fucking love him, 17,000 exes and all.

honorable mentions: alec lightwood, izzy lightwood, raphael santiago

6. jared dunn — silicon valley

if you haven’t watched this show i would actually recommend it. it’s impressive. but jared is, by far, one of the FUNNIEST characters i have ever experienced in my whole life. the only reason he isn’t #1 on this list is because i feel a duty to everyone ^^ up there, but jared is. GOD. physical depiction of “perfectly pleasant and put together until he goes APESHIT”

honorable mentions: gilfoyle, bighead

7. crowley — good omens

true chaotic neutral at its finest. a bastard of a man, who Tries To Be Good Anyways. sad and pining. mortals believe he’s mafia, which is fucking hysterical to me. SINCE I STARTED THIS I FOUND OUT WE ARE GETTING A GOOD OMENS S2???? RISE TF UP

honorable mentions: aziraphale, anathema device

8. mazikeen — lucifer

she’s just.. uhhhh. she’s SO…… G O D. no words except that she’s the only reason i got through the 2nd season. so happy that she finally got a gf ❤️ she absolutely deserves it

honorable mentions: ella, trixie

9. toph beifong — avatar

absolute fucking legend. blind and kicked ass 24/7. this is my daughter and i love her very much. also apparently i’m an earthbender???? not too sure abt that one tho

honorable mentions: sokka, katara

10. alaric saltzman — the vampire diaries

okay couldn’t put a gif for this one bc of the tumblr limit but vampire hunter sticks around and acquires a vampire bro and a vampire daughter and trains a vampire hunter son and then acquires a vampire coparent to his 2 biological witch daughters… fantastic trope. i feel bad for him because his wives keep dying but he was a GIFT in the vampire diaries, no one did it like him

honorable mentions: bonnie bennett

tags: @attempted--eloquence @frustrateddumbbar @thecenturiestrickle @rohesiawrites @ttp5000 @cordelia---rose @songbvrd @li0nh34rt @edge0fmydesiree @lucilucialu

[hishoukoku]

Tag Game:

10 Characters, 10 Fandoms, 10 Tags

Tagged by: @oddishblossom. Thank you! 💖

This was certainly a trip down memory lane haha. I forgot I was really into a few of these a while back. I may not be in most of these fandoms now, but I put them in for them being my obsession at some point in time.

Rn my head is filled with MDZS anyway so xD

1. Wei Wuxian ~ MDZS

He is one of my absolute favorite characters of all time. I adore everything about him, he's outrageously smart, calculated, intelligent, witty, funny, sexy, he invented necromancy, his morality is perfect (in the novel) what more do you want?

I really have to keep this short and not a 10k essay xD

2. Xie Lian ~ TGCF

Xie Lian's character compelled me through his absolute resilience and tenacity, despite all his trauma. He's been through an outrageous amount of pain and suffering, yet he's selfless but unafraid to fuck ship up when needed. He also recognizes and loves Hua Cheng for exactly who he is and I love him too.

3. Luo Binghe ~ SVSSS

Going from withstanding Shen Jiu's physical and emotional torture, to falling madly with Shen Qingqiu to being 'betrayed' by him and to coming back (all demonic and sexy) to being obsessed even more up to marrying him. He's been through a lot, he's willing to endure whatever it takes if it means he can be with Sheng Qingqiu. The entire plot was altered due to his infatuation with him.

4. Zuko ~ ATLA

If you've followed me for a while I posted a bit / spam reblogged ATLA on this blog. Zuko was always the most compelling character in ATLA for me and I will always love and defend him. He deserves a lot of love and recognition for his growth and development.

5. Chuuya ~ BSD

My gorgeous smart-ass half god, half jerk in love with Dazai. Port Mafia executive Nakahara Chuuya. I theorized a lot about him when I was OBSESSED with BSD and his character is extremely interesting to delve into. + he can fuck up an army with his hands in his pockets xD

6. Shogo Makashima ~ Psycho-Pass

Wouldn't be able to talk abt this show now due to it being so long ago, but at the time I watched this I remember thinking: 'this is the absolute best, most intricate and most well designed villain of all time and I am IN LOVE'. Of course, it's been a long time since and I've the same opinion about others now, but still worth putting here for my brainrot back then.

7. Kageyama Tobio ~ Haikyuu

Before MXTX I was extremely invested in Haikyuu. I loved everything Tobio represented from the first moment he showed up on screen and god knows I fought to defend him a lot.

8. Alucard ~ Castlevania

Castlevania was my shortest obsession, but during the time I watched it I feel in love with Alucard. I cried over my half vampire boy finally getting the happiness he deserves.

9. Envy ~ FMA

I know not everyone's favorite, but he always stood up as that villain that wasn't ridiculously OP for no reason, as FMA does. He had his insecurities and vulnerabilities, he was very realistic and believable!

10. Fushiguro Megumi ~ Jujutsu Kaisen

Megumi's ability not to care what others think judge things by his own ideology is what drew me towards him. Plus he's extremely stoic and calculated.

This was difficult because from each of these fandoms I love a lot of characters and I'm into a lot of ships. I could re-do this list for the same fandoms with a whole set of characters, a few times over haha.

And now for the 10 Tags too:

This is a lot and y'all really don't have to if you don't want to <3

Tagging: @hualianaddict @novas-grimoire @captain-stab-a-hoe @dual-domination @my-surname-is-jin @sweet-sweet-days @shigacajun @anisthasiazewicor @mushrooms-and-ivy @theheartconstellation

Sorry if I missed anyone in the 10 tags list and sorry if some of you already did it. If anyone else wants to do it, please do and you can say I tagged you!

[readyourimgaines]

The Little Things

Summary: Derek knew fully well that moving in with Spencer was going to bring around some changes. Dr. Spencer Reid was different and Derek loved him for it. There were little quirks that the doctor showed at work and some Derek was still learning. So there must be some at home.

And a special thanks, of course, to @chaoticgremlinwholikescheese​ for helping me compile this list!

1. Alphabetizing Movies by Title

“Pretty Boy?” Derek was crouched down in front of their TV looking for their movie while Spencer did the dishes. The latter hadn’t seen Happy Gilmore and Derek couldn’t let that stand. 

“Yeah?” Spencer called from the kitchen. 

“I can’t find it?”

“What?” Spencer stepped away from the sink and went to the living room. Water dripped from his fingertips. “The movies are alphabetical. It’s between Hamlet and Ice Age.” He went to Derek’s side and gestured to the movie. “I was going to order them by director, but Hotch said most people don’t know directors very well. Which is a shame because J.J. Abrams destroyed Star Trek but Guy Riche-” 

Derek pressed a kiss to Spencer’s lips with a fond smile. Spencer blinked. 

“Sorry,” the doctor blushed. 

Derek just chuckled. “You know you’re adorable, right, Pretty Boy?” 

“You may have mentioned it a time or two,” Spencer laughed. 

“You can tell me all about directors later,” Derek promised. “I know a bit about the mainstream guys, but not a whole lot.”

“All you really need to know is that J.J. Abrams kills anything he touches and Peter Jackson doesn’t get as much attention as he should.”

*****

2. Morning Rituals

One thing that Derek very quickly learned about Spencer was that he 

had a specifically timed morning ritual when not on a case. And that if it was broken or disturbed, the whole rest of the day would go down hill like a train on greased tracks. 

He woke up at 6:17, was in the shower by 6:25, eating breakfast by 7:00, his bed made by 7:30, and shoes on his feet by 7:32. The last half hour before they left at 8:00 was free game. 

The first morning in their new place was the roughest. Spencer went 

about his usual morning, but Derek didn’t usually wake up until 7:45 because he took less time to get ready and ate in the car. So when Spencer finished breakfast and went back to their room to make the bed but Derek was still asleep… He paced for the next fifteen minutes and his head nearly went through the ceiling when Derek’s alarm went off. 

Spencer almost had a panic attack as he fumbled his way through making their bed and cramming his feet into his shoes. Needless to say, the extra half hour was spent- in vain- trying to calm the doctor down. None of the rest of the day lined up properly and Spencer was on edge and fidgety. Hotch even had to gently remind him to focus a few more times than the usual redirection of infodumps. 

That was the first and only time Derek didn’t follow Spencer’s morning routine. He found the same day that Spencer had a much simpler night ritual: Snack (sometimes) at 10:10, teeth brushed by 10:25, in bed by 10:35, reading until (supposed to be) 11:18, and then lights out. This routine was much more flexible and relaxed.

Derek found waking up and going to bed at the same time every day made the former much easier. He also found that Spencer reading to him most nights- no matter the book or topic- was very relaxing. And of course there were nights when Derek read to Spencer.

*****

3. Sugary Coffee

Derek took a sip of coffee from his travel cup and whistled. “Think I got yours, Pretty Boy. There’s enough sugar in this to hype up a six year old’s birthday party.” 

Spencer braced himself and took a sip of the coffee in his own cup. He was pleasantly relieved when the bitterly sharp taste expected never came. “I-I put sugar in both of them. I wasn’t thinking,” he said sheepishly. 

Derek shrugged. “You know what they say: I’ll try anything once.” He chuckled. “I’ll just brush my teeth for an extra three minutes.” 

Spencer scoffed as he got into the passenger seat of Derek’s car. “Who knows? Maybe you’ll like it. You don’t get the caffeine drop when the eight hour half-life is over.” 

“Is that why you put so much sugar in coffee?” Derek raised an eyebrow, thinking he already knew the answer. 

“And coffee tastes like battery acid. I’d rather drink vinegar than black coffee.” Spencer shuddered. 

Derek chuckled but didn’t say anything else as he pulled onto the street.

*****

4. Cuddly Sleeper

Even though Spencer wasn’t huge on PDA like Derek was, he sure was a cuddly guy. The second the door closed, he was a six foot koala. That included in bed- but usually not until after he was asleep. 

Some nights, Spencer would fall asleep reading. So Derek would take his book, close it, gently remove Spencer’s glasses, and turn out the lamp. Nine times out of ten, Spencer was curled up against his side before Derek was asleep himself. 

At first, Derek found himself wondering why Spencer wasn’t nestled against him before sleep took him. But after a while, it sunk in that the doctor unwound by reading. 

The look on Spencer’s face when he curled into Derek’s side always sent the older man over the moon. The absolute peace on the doctor’s face. One night, Derek almost woke Spencer up laughing. Derek rolled over to out the lamp and Spencer had gripped Derek’s arm tighter and whined in his sleep. Derek then had to assure his boyfriend- in soft whispers as to not actually wake him up- that he wasn’t going anywhere. 

Spencer never thought to question why his book and glasses were gone when he woke up.

*****

5. Leaves Books Everywhere

Anyone who had a 30 second conversation with Spencer- anyone who glanced at Spencer- could tell the man read more than he did anything else. 

Derek picked up the doctor’s satchel once and was moderately surprised the slim man hadn’t dislocated his shoulder with how heavy the bag was. But Spencer didn’t only keep books in his bag. No. They were all over the place. 

Their bedroom, the craft room where Derek made floor plans for his renovations, the kitchen, the dining room, the living room. Even both bathrooms and the basement. 

When the two first moved in together, Derek debated building an extension onto the living room for a library. He still debated it from time to time (just in case). But as time wore on, Derek grew to appreciate the countless (if seemingly random) books around the house. 

Spencer would read when Derek was working on floorplans, so Derek would read when Spencer worked on an academic paper or consult. 

“What’re you reading?” Spencer asked one night, finally looking up from his notebook. He was writing an essay on how handwriting analysis could help catch a serial killer and/or rapist. 

“I don’t even know,” Derek chortled. “Uh..” he looked at the cover, “it’s Introduction to Law by Joanne Banker and Yvonne Ekern.” 

“Oh! Hotch loaned that to me yesterday,” Spencer noted. “I should get that back to him soon.” 

Derek just shook his head. “You know, Pretty Boy, I didn’t read this much in college.”

Spencer smiled. “See? Maybe there’s a good side to not spending thousands of dollars on building a library,” he teased.

6. The Nightlight

In the bedroom, in the outlet closest to the door was a nightlight. But not just any night light. This nightlight made the move in the front pocket of Spencer’s satchel. 

“So what’s the story behind this platypus, Pretty Boy?” Derek had to ask one night as Spencer turned it on. “Because you’ve had this since before we were dating.” 

“My uh- my mom’s went on a sort of field trip with her hospital a couple years ago. It was on one of her good days. She saw this in the aquarium’s gift shop and bought it for me.”

“That’s pretty cute,” Derek encouraged. He knew Spencer didn’t open up about his mom often so Derek tried to learn everything he could about the woman during the rare occurrences. 

“We named him,” Spencer laughed. “Alfred Nicholas Brian Reid.” He giggled. “I just… He helps.”

*****

+1. Bleeding/Infected Hangnails

Spencer usually had something to stim or fidget with. A strip of paper, a pen or pencil to twirl, a shirt with a loose thread, something. On the off chance that he didn’t, the doctor somehow decided that his fingers were good enough. If Spencer didn’t have a hangnail, he’d start one. 

This was the one and only thing about Doctor Spencer Reid that Derek Morgan hated. He could see the minute flinch when Spencer held a utensil wrong and it pressed on the swollen skin. He heard the soft hiss when Spencer got tomato or orange juice in the broken skin. 

What Derek hated even more than that was when the hangnail would get infected. The skin around the nail or turn a greenish-yellow and harden. Which, in turn, gave Spencer another thing to pick at. 

“Pretty Boy, you gotta stop,” Derek sighed. He’d gone into a convenience store to get them something other than coffee- but tastier than water- to drink. While inside, he bought a box of Band-Aids and a tube of anti-bacterial cream. 

Spencer snapped out of his daze. “What?”

“Picking at your nails.” To prove his point, Derek took Spencer’s hand in his to show him, as well as to stop his current picking. “I know you’re worried about the case, Baby, but we’ll catch the son of a bitch and put his ass behind bars like we always do. You gotta stop destroying your hands.”

“I didn’t realize I was,” he admitted. 

“I know,” Derek said softly. He applied the cream and a Band-Aid to each finger that needed it (five in total between both hands). “We just gotta get you a couple of those fidget cubes Garcia has.”

Tag List: @mayonnaiseismycomfortfood​

[jamesvanriemsdyk]

it's loving my friends hours, folks

hi so. i hit 1.5k a bit ago and while i dont want to do a follow forever (did one for 1k, it took so fucking long), i do want to like. talk about my friends! because i love them. so here we go, time for emo hours here at james jamesvanriemsdyk dot tumblr dot com

to all of the people ive met and talked to in the past few months: i am so grateful to have met you. i am so grateful to be your friend, whether we talk every day or not, and it is such a huge fucking gift to know you and be known by you. i would give you all a little paragraph but then i would get out of control and this post would never end because i have a lot of fucking love in my heart okay??? i love yall a whole hell of a lot ( @goaliehugs​ @farfrombucky​ @andrewcogliano​ @couturriere​ @brockmcgrinn​ @boesersson​ @steadyfreddie​ @nicolasaube-kubel​ @alexvass​ @beauvilliers​ @girouxes​ )

to all the mutuals i see in my notifications a lot (and the ones i dont), the new followers and the old ones, all my super sweet anons, anyone who’s tagged a post with a lovely comment or who’s messaged me with sweet words: thank you. for just like - existing in the same timeline as me, and being wonderful, and choosing to be kind even though im a clown. i love you all a lot.

to @heckeyleague​ @iceburgh87​ and @assistantcaptainmitchmarner​ : im so grateful we still talk, if only every once in a while, and if only through streak snaps. it’s been, what, how many years? four? more? i look forward to snaps of your pets and the little glimpses of your lives i get every day. i love yall to pieces.

and here we go:

@fireworksatdawn​ : hi jayc. its, like, really hard to believe that ur essay comments on my fics led to this but - im really grateful. just, really fucking grateful. youre so kind and so loving and such a wonderful presence in my life and im so grateful that once c*vid has died down, we’ll, like. be able to see each other? fucking wild. thank you for all the fic convos and the tswift tiktoks, and the memes when im sad. i love you a ton, and im so, so glad you’re my friend. shoutout to philly as, like, a concept for giving me all the emotions i needed to write my heartbeat fics. (im still emotional about the fact that you tell me ‘its late for you, go to bed’ every time i stay up past 10pm. its the being known for me <3)

@pencilhoarders​ : my favorite flyers art witch. what an incredibly kind, talented soul you are. what a beautiful heart you have, really and truly. i love listening to you talk about your ideas and seeing your art process, and i love that your mind works like mine does, and that we really do understand each other. i love that you’re going after your dream and i know you’ll be incredible at whatever you decide to do post-grad - you’re simply too amazing not to be. thank you for sending me those anons about the canes what feels like forever ago; i am so fucking glad i get to call you my friend.

@majorpenalty​ : you are, without a doubt, one of my most favorite people ive ever met on this site. your life is fucking wild and you are so funny and kind and resilient, and i never want to not be your friend. i love losing my mind with you for five to eight hours on zoom, i love just being able to just exist with you even though we have half a country between us. you are so intelligent and strong and lovely, and you deserve every single good thing in the entire world. thank you also for sending me those wild ass anons, and for sending me all the videos of you singing trap bunny bubbles and tswift on snap (we have the yellow heart now uwu) and for just - being there and understanding. you are so brilliant and i cant fucking wait to watch you continue to grow and succeed. i love u so fuckin much.

@softgrantaire​ : hi, alex! kiss the cats and your baby for me and tell your husband i said hey. also, sorry in advance for how long and sappy this is about to be, because im already choked up thinking about it! so: i would not be the person i am today without you. its been a literal month since we became friends, but i literally have never felt more immediately loved or accepted by anyone in my life. you are, probably, the reason i felt comfortable enough to change my name in public; youre the first person i told i was deeply uncomfortable with my name and you changed it immediately, without fucking blinking, and i knew trans friends hit different, but i didnt realize how different it would hit til i met you. and its not just that, either, its the kindness and the trust and the mutual respect, and the pics and vids of jules and the cats all day, its being genuinely excited to see your name pop up on my phone screen, its the voice messages on my way home from work and its the sound of you laugh and the comfort that exists in the little space we’ve carved out for ourselves. i love being your friend, and i love that you’re my friend, and i want us to be that for a long, long time -  ill always be the nolpat to your g. i love you so fucking much, dude.

@codyglass​ : ngl, i typed your url and just like - froze, for a minute. because like. how do you talk about a friendship like this? how do you put it into words? how do you describe all of the laughter and the tears and the years we’ve had together? its the kindness for me, its the communication and comprehension for me, its the unconditional love for me. there isnt a place i feel safer than our friendship; there isnt a person on earth i love like i love you. thanks for all the late nights, all the massive fic concepts/outlines we’ll never write but always find solace in, for all the nolpats roasts, for all the hockey tears and all the real life tears too. for listening to folklore with me for the first time when it dropped, for understanding when i couldnt turn it off for weeks after, for getting the days i send you 30 messages in a row and the days i cant get out of bed. it’s so fucking insane that we’re friends, still - how fucking incredible is it that i met my best friend, who lives 1846 miles away from me, through fucking hockey of all things? youre the best gift life ever gave me, and its such a fucking blessing to be alive at the same time as you, much less to be your best friend. i love you to the moon and to saturn.

[swiftiephobe]

thoughts on edit discourse, aka “you all realise this is meant to be fun?”

okay so buckle up swifties because i have some THOUGHTS about the whole edit discourse, the idea of needing to support editors by reblogging their posts and where i think some of you are a bit... misguided in how you approach sharing content on tumblr.com. this is a long post (i have put it under a cut because it is that long) because i am incapable of saying things concisely and i cannot think of another way to get my points across without having them misrepresented. i know a lot of people might ignore this because it’s a long ass essay, and that is valid <3 i just wanna get these thoughts out there. i do appreciate anyone who chooses to read this and try and understand my point of view. i love editors and the content they create. i do not love the idea that people have to run their blogs and engage with content on this website in a very specific way in order to be acceptable to the community.

also this isn’t directed at any one person in particular. the attitudes i am talking about are pervasive in a large portion of the fandom, and i’ve seen them building for quite a while now. i’m happy to have a respectful discussion about many of the points i’ve made here, as i know a lot of you will disagree with them. the purpose of this post isn’t to “attack” people, it’s to provide a different perspective.

i wanna preface this by talking about when i first started posting edits. i don’t do it a lot now mostly because i’m busy and don’t often feel like it but back in 2017/2018 i really got into editing. i remember when i first taught myself how to make gifs in photoshop, and i made my first gifset, and i was so excited to post it because i was so proud of myself for having created something. so i posted it, and then i kept making and posting gifsets. most of them didn’t get many notes, and frankly a lot of them were not very good because i was still learning, but i still posted them because it was nice to have created something. 

one day i posted a gifset and tagged it with some appropriate tags, including tagging some big source blogs. well, one of those big source blogs actually reblogged my gifset! and i was so excited by that. i even went and sent that blog an ask profusely thanking them for reblogging my edit. it’s a bit embarrassing to think about having done that now, but the point is i was so excited to have a blog that i considered “important” reblog my stuff, and of course that led to more notes on the gifset which made me happy. that gifset ended up getting about 150 notes, which still isn’t a lot but it made me happy at the time.

why am i telling this story, you might ask? because i want to put it out there that I GET IT. getting that reblog on that gifset made me, a baby editor, very very happy. ecstatic, even. the fact that i can still remember it now shows how much it meant to me. i was already proud of myself for having created something that i thought was good, but getting that extra bit of external validation to tell me that what i had created was actually good felt special. so i understand why editors want people to reblog their work. it makes us feel good to see that others are enjoying what we’ve made enough to want to share it with others.

so i kept making edits, some of them got a lot of notes while others really didn’t. i continued to learn new things about editing, i played around in photoshop and got excited every time i realised a new thing i could do with one of the tools. some of the edits i made were a lot of work, and i was very proud of them, and i still am very proud of them. a lot of those edits that hold a special place in my heart did not get many notes. one edit that i made (which was a url graphic for another person) took hours and a lot of hard work trying to figure out how to make my idea happen, and i think now it has less than ten notes.

sometimes i look back through my edit tag and i see edits like that one, that i loved making and thought turned out very well, but have relatively very few notes. and honestly? when i look at them, i don’t feel sad about the number of notes they have. sure, i think “well, it would’ve been nice if more people had seen this”, but for the most part i still feel damn proud of myself for having made it. i feel happy looking at them because they remind me of when i was making them and how much i enjoyed the process. 

at the end of the day, editing isn’t something i do as a job, for the sake of meeting a quota or reaching a benchmark of external achievement. it’s a hobby, something i do because i enjoy the process of creating something. i post my edits here so that they can be hosted publicly on my blog, and yes while getting notes is very very nice, it’s not my primary motivation. this year i’ve mostly been making edits for albums that i have enjoyed, some of which have practically no audience on tumblr and so don’t get many notes. and that’s fine. i don’t make them for other people.

which i suppose brings me to a point that i feel like will upset some people, but... the way some of you talk about editing, sometimes it seems like you don’t even enjoy it? i know that’s ridiculous because you all do, and many of you are crazy talented, but when i read people posting about how getting less than 100 notes on an edit makes them want to give up and never post an edit ever again, i frankly have to wonder if you even enjoyed making the edit in the first place, and if not, why did you do it? it just seems like a lot of you have a warped idea that the end goal of making an edit is notes, when in my opinion it really should be for fun. we’re in the taylor swift tumblr fandom. this is meant to be fun, remember? it’s okay to be upset when something you thought was great doesn’t receive as enthusiastic a reception as you were hoping for, but it happens to everyone and it doesn’t mean you, or others, are doing something wrong. if you enjoyed creating something, and you are proud of it, that’s what really matters in the end.

something else i’ve noticed is the extreme policing of how people interact with edits, mostly the notion that you HAVE to reblog edits and anything else is offensive and unacceptable. and sorry, but no. everyone runs their blogs in a different way. some people use their likes as bookmarks for things they want to reblog or queue for later. some people have a specific aesthetic they want to keep for their blog so don’t reblog every single thing, but they still want to acknowledge that they saw your edit and liked it. people have a million reasons why they don’t want to reblog something, and since it is their blog and their space, all of them are valid. 

when you post something to a public social media website, you have to accept that people are going to interact with it in the way that suits them most (this is of course excluding hate or stealing, those are not acceptable). if you are seeing a like on your edit and somehow extrapolating it into some “this isn’t good enough” statement, you are reading way too much into it. if people are liking your edit, it’s because they like your edit. is it nice when people reblog your stuff? yes. but people aren’t obligated to do so.

this also applies to the idea of keeping comments in the tags. i agree that commenting in the tags on edits is proper etiquette, and it’s something i always do. but the absolutely vitriol i have seen directed towards people who comment on their reblogs is not okay. i’ve seen people talk about blocking people who comment on their edits. it’s not nice. if you see someone say “i love this!” about your edit and your first thought isn’t “that’s so nice!” but instead “this person said this in the wrong place so i hate it”, please get your priorities straight.

i think most of the discussion surrounding edits starts off in a good place. it’s good to remind people that reblogging edits is the best way to support them, and that it will make people happy. i think that message has been made clear time and time again, but now it’s turning into something more aggressive. you all say that the fandom is “dying” because people don’t interact with edits (as a side note, edits aren’t the only valid form of content in the fandom. funny text posts, theories, discussions and ask games all contribute to the feeling of the fandom being alive just as much as edits do), but all that these rules you’re trying to implement do is scare people away. people will become more and more afraid to interact with anything, for fear of not interacting enough, not interacting in the right way, or not interacting with the right people. and that, ultimately, will do a lot more harm to the fandom than people liking your edits.

[veilder]

Tagged by @monchikyun. Thank you!

Rules: Tag however many people you want to know better/catch up with and then answer these questions

THREE SHIPS:

Convin (Connor/Gavin) - Anyone who knows me at all know that I absolutely adore Convin. They are absolutely my favorite sort of ship and they’re so dang versatile! You want enemies to lovers? Gotcha covered. You want snark and sass? Buckle up, babe. You want dynamic character growth, both as a unit and on their own? You’re in for a wild ride. Do you want two people with wildly different backgrounds coming together to learn they’re not so different after all? Man oh man, I got a treat for ya! I just... They are so wonderful in the lessons they can teach and in the intimacy they can portray. (And while the above describes my favorite variance of their dynamic, you can definitely find different iterations out there. Anyone who thinks this ship has no bite needs to reconsider, lol. Connor is canonically a ruthless killing machine and a dork who loves dogs. He definitely can hold his own against even Gavin at his worst.) But it comes down to growth for me. Both of them learning to become better people as they go along. They are very dear to me.

North60 (North x RK800-60) - Yeah, this is a weird rarepair. What of it? They’re actually amazing and I’ll explain why. Now, I know people’s interpretation of Sixty can change a lot. Heck, even I twist his motivations around sometimes when the plot requires it. But no matter how you look at it, Sixty didn’t really have... a good introduction to deviancy. Heck, considering I headcanon him as deviating only miliseconds before Hank’s bullet impacts him, I’d say that’s quite the understatement. Which is where North comes in. North, who understands both the regret of past actions and simultaneously the rage at her creators for how she was programmed. Who’s nurtured her anger--thrived in it--almost since the nascence of her deviancy. Who knows what it is to give into her negative feelings but then (with help) has managed to rise above them towards a better end. She’s lived through these same feelings Sixty is experiencing. Different circumstances, yes. But the same emotions. And I feel like, of anyone in the game, she could really understand him and the things he struggles with. She could help him, like Jericho helped her. She could be someone who doesn’t outright condemn his outbursts but instead allows him to vent his tangled feelings, to hit things, to spar with her when it gets to be too much. Because she knows what it’s like, keeping all that inside, and she doesn’t want that for him. And I think, slowly but surely, Sixty would begin to trust her. Even when everyone else in the world has betrayed him or left him for dead, here is one person who cares. And I think that would mean the world to him. I just... I see their relationship as a very healing one. One that would be good for both of them due to how well they’d get along and understand each other, even without words. They could both be what each other needs without any shame between them. And rA9 help anyone who stands in the way of both of them, omg. #PowerCouple

Anderstern (Hank x Amanda) - ...Yes, hello, it’s me again with another rarepair. But look, this has a lot of potential, just hear me out. Okay, so, what’s also probably obvious to everyone who knows me is that I 100% headcanon Hank and Connor in a familial relationship. I am so here for fics that focus on their bond and help it to grow and get them to the point where they can unshakingly call each other family. Everyone also probably knows that I adore redemption stories. And I could write a whole essay on Amanda and why I love her and her potential, but this is already so long, omg. (I’m sorry!) But suffice to say that I feel she definitely has the potential to deviate, too, especially after the good ending of the game. Do you see where I’m going with this, lol? On one side, a man who used to hate him, who was gruff and uncouth and blamed androids for his loss and even took it out on Connor, but he changed and grew and became someone Connor loves. And on the other side, an AI who spent Connor’s formative moments as a teacher and a guide, who is imo the closest thing to a mother he’s ever known, who was forced by her programming to manipulate him and chide him and threaten him until even more drastic measures were taken and she tried to take over him completely. But now with deviancy behind her, she could be someone who can change and grow beyond what she was designed to be. Who might be able to embrace the role of teacher and guide without her programming forcing her into circumstances that put her and Connor at odds.  Now, take these two flawed individuals, two people who care for Connor (and perhaps Sixty and Nines, too, if they’re around) a great amount and want to do better by him, the two people who are the closest things to parents he’s ever known-- Take these two people and force them to collaborate. To work together. To co-parent. And then perhaps... learn to care for each other, too? I am in love with the idea of this, for real. And I deeply regret not writing them more at this point. They deserve it. I definitely have ideas for them, lol. (Stay tuned!)

LAST SONGS LISTENED TO:

here comes the sun - bill wurtz (Hecc yeah!! I heckin love this dude and his weird-ass music, omg. New song just came out!!!)

Lost in Thoughts All Alone (flute cover) - skytywong (An absolutely beautiful rendition of this song, omg. This vid does not have enough views.)

Thunder & Lightning - NSP (I have this CD on in my car right now, lol. Heard this on my way home from work. It actually rocks, even if it’s absurd to the extreme. XD)

CURRENTLY WATCHING:

Full Metal Panic? Fumoffu - It’s been like a literal decade since I watched FMP but I remember loving it so much as a teen. So I decided to rewatch it lately and-- Still awesome, lol. I’m currently halfway through Fumoffu and then I’m watching The Second Raid. And then--! And then--!! THEY MADE A NEW SEASON FOR IT!! LIKE TWO YEARS AGO!! AH, I HAVE NEW CONTENT TO LOOK FORWARD TO!!!!

CURRENTLY READING:

Lol, fanfic as usual. XD Been really digging Amidst a Crash of Worlds by fireplanetz, a post-canon war story told entirely through letters between Connor and Gavin as they’re separated by the conflict. It’s... very good. Has had me all emotional more than once. And I really dig the format.

HOW’S IT GOING?

It’s going, lol! Nah, but I’m doing okay. I’ve just gone back to work after a very lengthy furlough period and I am definitely feeling it, omg. (I do an outdoor, physical labor job, omg.) I’m sore all over from using muscles that I haven’t in months. But it feels good at the same time! I’m glad to be back out there interacting with my co-workers and getting off my ass, lol! Hopefully, I can get back into some sort of shape before business picks back up again. XD

Tagging: @shootmewithasilverbullet @anchorsoutatsea @nohrianxscum @aureolite @sharysisnhmoonshadow and whoever else would like to do this! ^_^

[mercurryblack]

Chapter 7: Lillian

The team gets ready for their respective dates... or lack thereof.

❃❃❃

“Ugh. We get a night off, and I’m stuck with an essay.”

Though the crime scene investigation had been a drag, in Cait’s opinion, their current situation sucked even more. They hungered for something exciting to happen— hell, a pissed-off Onikuma could crash through their door right then and there, and it would be a pleasant reprieve from the drudgery of a Grimm Studies report. Fighting was always preferable over writing.

Who cared about the variations in Grimm anatomy and physiology based on their habitat, anyway? One looked like an elephant, one looked like a wooly mammoth.

Either way, Cait had set themselves up for a boring night in, and was left silent and grouchy.

“How are you guys planning to spend your day-offs?” Hattie asked the Armilde twins as she slumped back against her pillow. Her small tophat remained firmly on her head, still lopsided.

Silently, Cait tried and failed to recount the last time they’d ever seen her without it.

“I have a charity event to go to,” Amaryllis replied, adjusting a clip-on silver earring onto her right earlobe.

“Oooh, that sounds exciting!” Hattie said, sitting up. “Can I come? Can I come?” 

“Sure! More people there means more funds for the cause. Plus, it’s public, so everyone in Mistral’s pretty much automatically invited.” Amaryllis paused, looking at her Scroll. “…You do still have that nice blue dress of yours from the dance, don’t you?”

“Yeah.” Hattie replied.

Amaryllis nodded. “You might want to consider throwing that on, since it’s a kinda formal event, but otherwise you’re welcome to tag along.”

“Yay!” Hattie squealed, clapping her hands. “Thank you, Ammy! You going with anyone else?”

“Hector Wulfric. The event’s organized by his family, actually.” Amaryllis answered. A smile crept onto her face while she planned how she was going to spend the evening with her boyfriend. 

“Oh.” Hattie said, immediately deflating. “In that case, never mind. I don’t wanna play third wheel.” She took a seat again on the end of her bed. “How about Lilly? What’s she gonna do tonight?”

Lillian wasn’t there to answer. She’d been in the bathroom for a good half hour, brushing her teeth to a complete and almost blinding white.

“She’s going on a date with… what was it, sweet guns? No, wait, she called her tha— Oh, I remember. Sweet buns.” Amaryllis recounted, barely stifling a giggle.

“Who now? Is she that same girl Lillian mentioned yesterday?” Hattie asked in the same moment as Lillian emerged from the bathroom.

“Hush, you.” Lillian said, having overheard them. “For the millionth time, Am, her name is Rosario— and yes, Hattie, she’s the same one I mentioned last night.” She explained.

“Remind me how it went, again? Was it, ‘I got a couple of “sweet buns” right here, and they’ve already got your name on ‘em.’” Amaryllis put her hands firmly on her rear and swung her butt in a circle. She wiggled repetitively, mocking a tease she had observed from Rosario.

Lillian turned to give Amaryllis an especially evil glare. “You know what, Am? You’re a pain in my ass.”

“Yeah, okay.” Amaryllis adopted a placating tone, though the mischievous glint in her eye remained. “But am I a pain in your sweet bu—?” She began, continuing her gluteal choreography.

With a snarl, Lillian grabbed one of Amaryllis’ good leather boots from the floor and hurled it at her sister. It collided with the top of the redhead’s cranium, and she let out a strangled yelp.

“Ow, ow, ow...” Rubbing the top of her head, Amaryllis snapped back, “I swear to god, Lilly, if you messed up my hair…”

Hattie giggled in the background, though she lacked context on exactly what Amaryllis was making fun about— something about sweet buns, but that was all she could make out. Her stomach growled at the thought of the tasty pastry.

“Okay, okay, it’s time to stop. Both of you had your laughs.” Lillian said, as she grabbed her drawstring bag and threw it over her shoulder. “And sorry, Hattie, but I got no extra room tonight. As roaringly as I think you two would get along, I think it’s about time I spend some alone time with my girlfriend.” She coughed.

“Mmm.” Hattie mumbled in response. Though downtrodden by the absence of her teammates for the night, she knew that it was neither of their responsibilities to take her along with them— after all, they still had their private lives. “…Lillian?”

“Yes?” Lillian asked, straightening her cropped hoodie around her midriff.

“Your girlfriend’s the same one with the pastry shop, isn’t she?” Hattie asked.

“Same one.”

Hattie puffed her lips out. “Will you bring back some pastries when you’re done with your date, pleeeease?”

“Sure, I think that could be arranged.” Lillian laughed. “Okay, I should be on my way by now— I don’t want to keep Rosa waiting.”

Amaryllis “I’m going as well— I’ve still got to pick up my dress.” She turned to Hattie and Cait for a moment. “Oh, and you two eat some dinner later, okay? Hattie, if you really have nothing else to do, it’d be really nice of you to help Cait finish their paper. Afterward, maybe you two can come down to the charity ball.” She said invitingly.

Hattie’s eyes lit up again. “Hey, maybe we could! What do you think, Cait?”

Cait didn’t make any effort to face the twins, instead opting to wave a hand to them while facing the window. “Yeah.” They replied listlessly.

“…Okay then. We’ll see you later.” With that, Lillian and Amaryllis turned and exited the dorm room.

***

As Amaryllis and Lillian walked through Haven’s low-lit and empty dormitory halls, they continued to talk about each other’s plans for the evening.

“So... where are you taking Rosario?” Amaryllis inquired in an innocent tone.

“We’re heading down to the cliffs. I heard there are some nice spots over there for a late picnic.” Lillian answered flatly, looking straight ahead without breaking her stride.

“Cliffs. How very romantic.” Amaryllis drawled.

“Yeah, yeah. How about you and Hector, got anything hot and heavy planned for tonight? I heard something about you picking up a dress. I smell something fishy here.” Lillian turned to face Amaryllis, wiggling an eyebrow.

“Ew, don’t even go there. This outfit is for tonight’s event, and tonight’s event only. I’ll change clothes after I go to the salon to get my hair and face done up, and I gotta hit that first since it’s already getting pretty late.” Amaryllis hesitated. “And as far as I know, the only thing that’ll be getting hot tonight is my face from nervousness. Hector said his dad’s going to be there, and he wants me to meet him.”

“Heh. I know the feeling.” Lillian chuckled.

She knew full well that her sister had never met Hector’s family before— both her and the Wulfric lad had seemed secretive about the whole relationship, though they had been dating for well over a year by now. She also was versed in the experience of having to meet a special someone’s family for the first time, and a sweaty face didn’t even start to describe it.

Honestly, it felt more like a jolt of terror up the spine, followed by the sensation of one’s stomach falling right into their feet.

“Don’t worry, Am. They’ll love you.” Lillian reassured her sister. Smirking, she continued, “Just don’t tell them that the reason their beloved son is head-over-heels for you is because of those lumps of fat glued to the front of your ribcage.”

Amaryllis flushed red, crossing her arms over her chest. “Oh, shut up. I’ll have you know that Hector loves all the fat in my body, regardless of its exact location.”

“Yeah?” Lillian retorted. “Tell that to the two loves of his life: peanut butter and jelly.” She teased as she pointed her thumb at Amaryllis’ chest. “…Or was it butter, and I can’t believe it’s not butter?”

“Please. His nicknames for my breasts are much more creative than that.” Amaryllis countered.

A pause.

“So you admit that he has nicknames for them, huh?”

Blushing a brighter shade of red, Amaryllis huffed and walked as fast as she could, overtaking Lillian. She was becoming increasingly annoyed with her sister, not because of what she was saying, but because she had no good retorts up her sleeve to retaliate with.

“Bye, sis. Have fun with your boob fetishist of a boyfriend.” Lillian waved, a guileless smirk plastered on her face.

“You have a nice date too… sweet buns fetishist!” For one last time, Amaryllis turned around to face Lillian and performed the corresponding taunt.

Turning around, she nearly walked right into a green-haired, pink-eyed girl with a toothbrush sticking out of her mouth, who had obviously been witness to her previous action. Unmoving, she apparently appeared to still be processing it.

After a moment’s pause, the girl blinked, snorted a small laugh and grinned. “Yeah, Sweet buns, all right.” She cracked, holding the toothbrush out of her mouth to speak.

Hiding her face with her arm from embarrassment, Amaryllis ran past the girl and out the entrance of the dormitory. Lillian and the girl watched with amusement as she fled.

“Hey.” The girl said, turning back to face Lillian.

“Hey.” Lillian replied, sparing a second’s eye contact as she walked past. She vaguely recognized her as one of the first-years.

With that brief acknowledgement, they both continued on their separate ways, in opposite directions along the hall.

[virginbutstillahoe]

supernatural: an essay

hello fellow clowns.

i need to get some things off my chest, so here we are.  read it, don’t read it, it’s up to you buttercup.  love you.

i’ve been watching since i was 11.  since 2009.  this show raised me.

my father was a really bad guy.  i’ve alluded to it a few times on here but, he was a really abusive and horrible man.  so, i leaned on this show.  it taught me, that even with an abusive father and a difficult hand dealt to me, that i could keep fighting and find the family that i could call my own.

it taught me that family didn’t end in blood.  you control your destiny.  love is stronger than your crap life.  don’t give up, baby.

i am angry about the finale.  enraged even.  but i still love this show and the actors and crew members that made it possible.  that will never change.  this show is what pulled me from the ledge more times than i can count.  made me laugh when i thought i never could again.  did more for me than words can describe to be perfectly honest.  

you may say, molly, it’s a stupid show with bad special effects and sometimes bad acting, there’s no way it’s that special to you.  and to you i say, i am so sorry for you that you don’t know what it’s like to love and enjoy something with your whole heart.

----

now, dean winchester is my favorite character of anything ever.  yes, castiel is a CLOSE fucking second, but dean is just god tier for me.  he is so human and so much like me.  he is the main thing that made me realize, hey, it’s okay to take your time in growing and to be damaged.  it’s okay to be flawed.  he is everything castiel said in his final moments and more.  a true lover.  a man who would put his family (blood relatives and non blood relatives) before anyone or anything.  

destiel aside.  it is OUT OF CHARACTER for dean winchester to not immediately ask for jack to bring cas back as soon as he had all of god’s power.  completely.  jesus christ he even asked GOD to bring him back.  

to continue, dean not asking to see cas as soon as he finds out that he’s not in the empty?  you have got to be kidding.  

i am a destiheller.  i won’t even try to lie here, i am.  but seriously, let’s just say for the sake of the argument, that dean isn’t in love with cas.  still, dean winchester would have wanted to see his best friend.  cas died.  dean would have wanted to find him and hug him immediately if he knew he was around.

jesus, didn’t you see him when he found cas in purgatory?

there is literally NO reason that castiel wasn’t present in the finale.  zero.

----

i am okay with dean dying for the ending.  i actually really am.  i liked the idea of dean dying to save two children, and doing what he loved. but immediately after they defeat chuck?  why?  couldn’t he have had a few years of joy?  of freedom?  why, after everything they’ve been through, did they continue to punish this amazing man, who was nothing but heroic and selfless for the world until the end?  i just don’t understand.

----

on a more positive side, my sammy.  he finally got a long and happy life.  albeit without dean but, he still had the chance to enjoy his freedom, and get the apple pie life he always dreamed of.  

and dean, oh my dean.  his ending?  i am angry about how it came about, but a heaven filled with the people he loves?  thank you for that.  thank you for bobby being there to greet him, for being at harvelle’s and kicking back.  thank you.

----

sorry to tell you, but i’m back to anger.  

misha. goddamn. collins. 

this man has done so much good for this show, for its fans, and for honestly the world in general.  he came on as as two second plot episode character that they planned to throw away after they used him to connect a couple dots, and his performance was so incredible, they ended up having to throw all their plans away and readjusting.  

he made this show good again, he gave it some life.  i would watch the show so intensely, hoping to see his face when episodes would air.  just his sheer presence in an episode made it more enjoyable.

how did he do that?

what do they give him for his service?  

- a death with almost no reaction from the other characters on the show

- a two second mention in the finale without any appearance

- his final words on the show being a prank call from fucking lucifer a long time hated character (and actor) on the show

- and the showrunners using his pull with the fans to trick us into watching an ending where he was nowhere in sight.

you might be saying, wait.  what do you mean by that last bullet.  well my little cherry blossom, let me explain.  

the writers and showrunners KNOW that we love misha and castiel.  they know it.  as i mentioned before, it was our love of the two of them that kept him on the show in the first place.  they know that his presence is what kept the show afloat.

so, they decided to use that to their advantage.  they became super mysterious and shifty about his whereabouts during the filming of the finale.  why?  why would they do that unless they were worried that we would lose interest and find somewhere else to be when the finale aired because our favorite part of the show was gone?  

they toyed with us just to ensure that we would maintain the ratings on their last hurrah.  and you know what?  that really feels like an enormous slap to the face.  

because guess what?  i would have fucking watched anyway.  would i have been upset and a little hurt that cas wasn’t in it?  absolutely, for all the reasons i described.  but i wouldn’t have been holding my breath in hopes of seeing him the entire time, and then have my heart ripped out of my chest like that in disappointment.  

i would have been able to appreciate the ending for what it was, and accept it wasn’t going to be exactly what i wanted ahead of time.  i wouldn’t be so angry now.  

and i resent them for making me feel that way.  this show did so much for me and is so much of the reason why i’m still here today, and they ruined it for me.  i am so angry that they took something so precious to me, and crushed it, just to get those extra bucks in from keeping the ratings in a good spot.  fuck you.  

----

during that whole montage of sam growing old and having a family (which i literally honestly loved, alright?) instead of having dean drive the car, which we’ve seen him do 384729387423 times, we could have seen dean reuniting with his mom, with charlie, fuck WITH CAS, and giving jack a nougie.  things that actually made sense, and made the most of the finite time we had left.  

i didn’t even need a love confession.  even just a hug, or an appearance from cas would have been enough for me.  because i know, romantic love or not (even though we all fucking know it’s romantic but since so many homophobic people watch the show we have to keep it dubious ugh), cas would be a part of dean’s heaven because cas is part of dean’s family, which is what gets dean out of bed every morning.  

----

listen, i am happy that the final minutes of the show were just sam and dean, hugging, and loving each other.  after all, that’s what started it all, right?  i’m just saying, they screwed us, the characters, and the legacy of the show for what seems to be no apparent reason.  it was just laziness, homophobia, or something else that doesn’t make any sense to me.  

what was the point of the deancas relationship arc for there to be no resolution?  what was the point of brining eileen into sam’s life for them not to be together?  

i truly, just don’t understand.  i don’t.

they really could have made this something amazing, and jaw dropping, but they chose not to.  and i will never forgive them.

----

all that being said though, thank you supernatural.  thank you for making me who i am today.  thank you for making me laugh, cry, and survive so long.  there are memories, people, and messages that you sent to me that will stay with me forever, and that i will never forget.  

to the actors, i hope you know, that any anger you might see from me, or from most of us (don’t want to speak for everyone), are at the writers, not you.  i see all of your hard work and your devotion.  you are everything that makes this show great.  you are what made this show.  thank you for everything.  

and to jensen specifically, i am truly sorry.  i really thought you were being an ass and that you didn’t like the ending bc of stupid reasons, but it turns out you were right.  i’m sorry they didn’t listen to you, and i’m sorry that i doubted you.  you’ve done nothing but love this character and give it your all, and you and misha really got shot in the foot.

your hard work did not go unnoticed.  

thank you for listening if you did. 

i love you all and it has truly been a pleasure.

i’m gonna tag a few people under the bar in case they’re curious about my thoughts. i might not really talk to a lot of you but i really respect your opinions and like you guys.  so yeah (:

tag list @prayedtoyou @destiel-is-canon-i-guess @starrynightdeancas @green-eyes-and-classic-rock @thetiredstuff

[ssecretssanta]

@h-isforhome bro !! this is the last one !! holy shit !! :’)

MERRY CHRISTMAS, LOVE !! ✨🥰🎄 I seriously can’t believe it’s already Christmas ! (time isn’t real and no one can convince me otherwise lmao)

I read your message this morning and it literally made me tear up and I couldn’t stop smiling wow I can’t believe secret santa soul mates exist and we found each other :’) like wow can you believe that you’re also the sweetest and funniest person ever?? (my whole heart literally went like 😳💖🥺😍 when you called me babe wOw I’m a sucker for terms of endearment)

I’m a Pro at pretending that deadlines don’t exist and haha my room is already becoming a mess again bc I didn’t fold my laundry and now I have the Christmas Mess to deal with, but it’s definitely a mood booster to have a clean environment !

yeah I’m so excited for normal hours again and it’s not too bad working everyday cause the shifts are shorter ! your job sounds so fun ! I’m glad the scheduling is so flexible, that’s super nice ! I literally Could Not wake up that early lmao my sister and dad worked the early morning shift at Target for a while and I literally have No Idea how they did it ajsjakla I’d simply Die instead

me and my sister used to share a room and it was a Disaster lmao ! I put Christmas lights up all around my room and I just so happened to have a strand of rainbow lights and ofc I had to put them up around my closet for that Sweet Symbolism and I’m honestly gonna get a kick out of it when I come out to my family and point out how many hints I’ve been dropping lmao

(ALSJAKAL that family simply does not have rights !! who puts up more decorations RIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS??)

babe it’s mutual I guess bc you have my heart too :’) I would serenade you with some one direction songs but I simply cannot sing so I’ll have to learn the fingerstyle playing instead oR ACTUALLY I’ll play the kazoo instead of singing lmao (ukulele kazoo nonsense rights)

haha I’ve thought about watching hsmtmts but I just can’t get over how Ridiculous and Long the title is??? Like what was the Point of calling it High School Musical The Musical The Series when you could have just shortened it?? I’ve heard great things about Atypical but I haven’t watched it yet !

(literally wtf. some people just get to like See things?? without paying for it?? W A C K)

ANSBAKAL that’s so unfortunate !! (but also kind of funny ngl sorry for laughing but the image of that happening to anyone is kinda hilarious) I’m a queen of awkward situations and I’ve learned to just let myself feel Mortified for a minute and the just Repress It so I can function lmao (and then it comes back when I’m laying in bed and I can relive it and overthink my entire existence oop)

literally imagine just,,, not writing an entire essay every time we communicate?? couldn’t be me 🤷‍♀️

oh boy I Felt That. Family really is the only consistency in life, for better or for worse I guess lmao. and for real, my parents have gotten so chill and it’s nice but also frustrating bc my bro gets away with literally everything

it should be Illegal for younger siblings to be taller than older siblings tbh, it’s just not fair to disrupt the power balance like that

lmao you calling me smart made me laugh but thank you ! I live for a bit of chaos but I definitely also love the thought of having a more chill vacation so I can actually enjoy myself lmao

(that’s wack to think about)

if something ends bad I’ll literally make my own ending for it bc Nope No Thank You. fix it fanfics are truly the greatest blessing on this earth lmao. (I’m most definitely still a loser but like a Chill loser so it’s okay haha)

gay domesticity and yearning is what I live for. there’s no other point to life than to find a fellow gay to be domestic with and yearn for. (I literally had to put the book down and yell silently for a solid five minutes when I realized what he was doing lmao I was a Wreck) this is the fic !! (I haven’t read it in a While so I don’t remember much of it oof) and I want to buy trc so bad but I just have the mobile versions rn ! finding the Energy is really the biggest struggle in life

bro you’ll be able to flex so hard, just think of all that cash and like, Status. I’m already proud of you :’)

sleep deprivation and being gay are my only cultures lmao

askaklsjaka wHaT eVen?? I can’t imagine wanting to have a baby on my own birthday lmao !!

tøp is great !! I was really Into them for a long time and I still love their music but I’m not as involved in the fandom anymore haha (but !! Tyler and Jenna are having a baby !! i legit tested up when I saw them post about it on Instagram !!) your sister is Valid bc Alec Benjamin is a sweetheart and his concert was Amazing !! pit sounds like a nightmare sometimes but I want to experience it at least once in my life lmao.

I’m hoping it’ll be a fun summer bc I need some good after finishing highs school and before moving on to college lmao !

I would also love to go to Europe ! I really want to go to New Zealand, Japan, and anywhere in Europe really haha

teleportation would be So Nice like wow imagine not having to Walk. I’d personally like to be able to stop time because then I might actually be able to get Things Done for once (and sleep !! Imagine all of the sleep !!)

I’m,,, gonna cry holy shit. This is it. Time has flown this month and reading your tags is making me realize just how lucky I got to get you for this whole thing ! you’re literally The Best and I’m so glad I’ve been able to get to know you through all of these long ass messages (long is definitely our thing and i can’t imagine a better way to have done it) 🥺💕 ily !! can’t wait to be able to dm and talk more regularly !! (I feel like all our chats will end up being novel length anyways lmao that’s just the way we are I think)

merry chrismas again !! sending you all the love and good vibes !! 💕✨💞💖

with all the love,

kate @lightsupbabes (your not-so-secret-anymore santa 🎅) 

[justine-the-guillotine]

5 Otome/Romance Game Men I Adore

Thank you so much @pseudofaux for tagging me! Also, thank you for saying that your own list was not in order or an exhaustive list because I often feel pressured to make a perfect list in these types of situations lol but if pseu was chill I can also be chill (EDIT: no there’s actually a lot of screaming below and absolutely no chill, I’m sorry, I lied.) 

I always talk too much and break too many rules when I do these things but that's just how I am lmfao so I'm gonna start off by saying IkeSen's Nobunaga Oda is my absolute favorite otome game man of all time... but I'm not going to officially include him on this list because I talk about him too much as it is already and I feel like enough people love him anyway. However, if anyone is interested in hearing me talk about Nobunaga ad nauseam, I will gladly entertain you. 

On to my list ~

1. Caramia, OZMAFIA!! - Ozmafia!! is my favorite otome game (MC be damned) and I love this man sooooooo much. His wedding CG has actually been the background on my phone for ages now. You know the "that's where the trouble began, that damned smile" meme? THAT'S FUCKING FOR HIM THAT'S HIM!!!!!!!!! That smile ruined my entire life in the best possible way and I have not known peace since. I guess I have a bit of A Thing for loveable, charismatic leaders. I just love a man who is full of power but big of heart ... and a little bit of a dumbass. Caramia is just like the total package...  He protecc, but he also attacc, and he also a snacc. Oh, and he can cook!!!

2. Fenrir Godspeed, Ikemen Revolution - Fenrir is really, really special to me and I put him in his own category entirely. In reality, Fenrir and Ray are actually tied as my IkeRev biases (and honestly I prefer them together; Alice is optional). Fenrir is actually so close to my heart that I refuse to even look at almost all fanfiction with him in it, with few exceptions. The fear that someone could "ruin" him by writing him in a way that even slightly disagrees with the way I picture him in my head (and I have seen it) is really too much for me to handle. Is this unhealthy of me? Probably, but I tend to avoid the situation all together so it doesn't matter. Not only do I self-insert in my games but I'm also not one of those people who separate fiction from real-life really well, so all of my biases are people I'd actually fall for IRL. And Fenrir is really special to me because he is actually the most perfect, ideal boyfriend in my mind but he is someone I absolutely do not deserve IRL and would probably run from for fear of ruining things. :'] So while any otome game man is a fantasy, he's like... top tier fantasy for me. He's just so perfectly easy-going, such a Prince Charming, Knight in Shining Armor, easy to read, so ready to love you, SO MUCH FUN... he's a Good Boi without being naive and innocent... he's like a wild-yet-safe adventure ugh he's like   p e r f e c t    I cry

3. Raymond, Blood in Roses - I don't necessarily think Blood in Roses is a great game; it definitely has its hits and its misses BUT it did grant me this one amazing man and therefore I will never uninstall it. I mentioned that I like lovable leaders but I also thoroughly enjoy being able to break down a brick wall of a man. Raymond starts off by being pretty cold to MC, caring really only for his duty (I love a loyal man), but takes MC under his wing anyway... and slowly realizes he has feelings for her and then of course becomes someone who is willing to die for her. This is peak romance, don't @ me.

4. Zen, Mystic Messenger - Zen is actually not my favorite to romance (that honor belongs to Jumin) but he is my #2. More importantly than the romance though, he is such a fucking good guy in every single route... ignoring all of Chertiz's little homophobic undertones of course (man do I wish Chertiz would rewrite Mystic Messenger so it's not so conservative, pleaseeee). He is willing to stand up for and protect MC in every route, not just his own. In all routes, he offers himself to MC as a shoulder to lean on, someone to cry to. He is always helpful to everyone!! Even though he and Jumin don't see eye to eye on most things, Zen is still ultimately supportive of him and wants what's best for him. ZEN IS A TRUE BRO. He's also super chill like he's all about his acting and performing... but he just also wants to drink beer, eat street food, and smoke cigarettes all day. I know people get turned off by his narcissism but fucking look at him okay he has every (!!!) right to be narcissistic. Plus, he doesn't let his ego get in the way of love and friendship and that's very important !!! In this essay, I will -

5. Leonardo DaVinci, Ikemen Vampire - I just want to type his name and send like 150000 weary emojis after it and be done with it. Honestly, it is at the point where I think he is on Nobunaga level for me. I have fallen very, very hard for him. I have two IkeVamp accounts and between the two of them I think I have done his full route about six or seven times. Every time I get to the scene where Comte suggests that Leonardo breaks it off with MC, I want to scream at the top of my lungs "BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM" like Ariel does in The Little Mermaid (Leonardo has his own moment where he internally shouts "I LOVE HER!!!!" so we're even tbh). First of all, HE IS SO FUCKING KNOWLEDGEABLE HE KNOWS SO MUCH AND HE KEEPS LEARNING THAT SHIT IS HOT. Also, I have seen people disagree with me on this but I personally don't think he's patronizing to MC. His MC, unfortunately, is written in that way where "ugh he's so mature and I is babey" so, of course, there are moments where he plays off of that but he literally has SO MUCH KNOWLEDGE and he never is like "wow I can't believe you don't know that you idiot" to MC even though the opportunity to do that is plentiful. He will tease her, sure, but that's totally different than being mean about it. The best thing about him being so intelligent is the fact he's also a fucking dumbass (I love me a dumbass, as you all know). He loves MC so, so much even though he doesn't show that in the smartest of ways all the time... but... he fucking walked into a dress shop and designed a whole ass custom dress for her?? He even picked out the fabric??? And then he pretended like it was Comte who chose it??? HELLOOOOOOOOOOO I LOVE HIM I'M ACTUALLY SCREAMING RIGHT NOW THAT'S WHY I HAVE TO TYPE IN CAPS I LOVE HIS MIND I LOVE HIM 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I'm gonna sneak in an extra number because I absolutely must.

6. Trash, Aloners - If you have never played Aloners, you really should because it is seriously an amazing visual novel (thank you @dear-mrs-otome  for casually mentioning this game like one time in a discord server otherwise I’m not sure that I would have found out about it). You can get it for free (or pay $5 for the redeux version), so there’s really no excuse unless you don’t have a computer. The love between MC and Trash is not the main plot of the story necessarily, but Trash is such a good man and he deserves the lovin'. Trash is like the perfect combination of sweet and snarky, respectful yet teasing, competent but dumb, has a good heart but doesn't always make the best decisions... in conclusion, what choice did I have but to fall helplessly in love??? 

This has been fun, I absolutely love screaming about 2D bois... I hope y’all don’t mind tags (also I haven’t really been around a lot so if you’ve been tagged already I’m sorry ;w;)  @luciens-one-and-only-sea-otter @lovingikesen @toonamifaithful @emeraldtawny @littlelady-blackwell @alloveroliver

[neutral-nobody]

Quiet Time

A/N: For those who don’t remember Team Branwin, here’s a link to their artwork. Pretty sure this is the first time anyone has written something with them in it. Hurray, they suck.

Synopsis: Cooped up and mentorless, the team, and especially Xav, struggle with being on the sidelines. 

Word Count: 3505

Virus World belongs to @voiceoflarka​

On a cold winter’s day, the team found themselves in a lull in the academy’s library. The snow was gently trickling outside, with students in a buzz over the upcoming events and missions they were all planning to embark on. Whispers of adventure, romance and fun were making the team grit their teeth, so Xav went to close the door to the room that Liadan had booked out for them. As he did so, his eyes narrowed as he spotted his sister, Faustine. She stuck her tongue out at him and grinned, so in turn Xav rolled his eyes at her antics and slammed the the door a little too hard.

“Thank Arceus you booked this Liadan,” Mana said thankfully, smiling at her as Xav sat down. “I couldn’t handle being out there with them all glaring at us.”

“God she’s a bitch,” Xav muttered, looking out the small window to the main part of the library. Faustine’s team, staring in, all gave a mocking wave.

“Yeah, no kidding,” Liadan pulled out her notebook and pens, gelled and coloured differently for practical note taking and essay planning.

“She’s been laying it on thick lately,” Suv noted. “What gives?”

“Because Mu and Victor have been away,” Xav huffed, following Liadan’s lead and getting his stuff out. “Apparently they’re away because they don’t want to train us anymore. They’re abandoning us.”

“Pfft, as if,” Nao boasted. “They love us.”

“She’s just jealous they don’t have 99ers for mentors,” Suv agreed. The rest of the team nodded along.

“Why did you book this room, Li?” Xav asked. “All of us usually do essay writing at home, save for you.”

“I figured we could use the change of scenery,” Liadan said, but then she let out a small sigh. “We’ve been cooped up for a little while, hey?”

“You can say that again,” Nao mumbled, sharpening his pencil to a very, very fine point. 

As the team began planning and writing their essays, Xav chewed his lip as he looked once again outside the window at his sister. Her sister’s incessant boasting combined with Liadan of all people’s noticing of their lack of action lately gave him a lot to think about. It had been a whole two months since the team had last been given any fieldwork. This didn’t seem like much to some, but they had just begun getting used to being consistently out there, with Mu and Victor at their side as their intrepid and kind mentors. Nao complaining about be stuck doing nothing was one thing, he would do so after two minutes. Mana would complain after a couple of weeks, Suv around a month later. But Liadan?

She would normally never have anything to say on that note. Which was why Xav was worried.

“Xav, hey,” Suv said, waving a hand in front of his face. “You with us?”

“Wha- yeah,” Xav blinked a few times before nodding. He grabbed Suv’s hand and gently pulled it down from his face. “Yeah I’m here.”

“Mana just got a text from Callow,” Suv said. “Read it!”

“Right, so I asked what they were up to,” Mana explained. “Since we’ve been stuck around campus for ages. Here’s what he said.”

Mana did a small cough to clear her throat before reading Callow’s text in a very overly-posh voice.

“Gamma and Psi have sent us on a training mission in the Dark Souls District. It’s been really cool, Glitch and Horns tag-teamed a massive wolf thing and kicked it’s ass. They’re coming to monitor us tomorrow. What are you guys doing?”

“What are you going to say back?” Liadan asked.

“Hang on, I’ll read it aloud.”

“We’re writing essays like boring normal students. Mu and Victor haven’t been here for two weeks. Can we borrow Gamma please?”

“Why do you want to borrow Gamma?”

“So Faustine pisses off about us having our mentors abandoning us,” Mana stated, using her fingers to make air quotation marks on the word abandoning. 

“Having another 99er around might shut her up...” Suv wondered, scratching his chin. 

“Let’s just get back to studying,” Xav said, sighing harshly. “Gamma has better things to do.”

The team all blinked and looked at each other, before returning to the work in front of them. Xav’s ears were flattened back slightly as he remembered why his mentors were currently unavailable. Victor was currently on a mission with the Raiders, and since none of them had his number, they were completely cut off from contact from him. From the little pieces of info they could gather before he left, it sounded fairly serious, and he seemed genuinely worried before he left. 

Mu on the other hand was in contact with Mana, or he would be if he wasn’t on a stealth mission with Yokohama. He’d expressly told Mana not to text her until he gave her the clear to do so. Those two would text fairly regularly, so for Mu to ask this of her meant that the whole team knew, this mission he was on was a big deal, and they could not risk jeopardising it for a couple of Sonic memes. Mana had agreed, and so they were now mentorless with no way of contacting them. Once Faustine had gotten wind of them being down two mentors, she had been laying it on thick to Xav ever since.

“What did he say?” Nao asked, as Mana’s phone buzzed with another text from Callow, pulling Xav once again from his train of thought. 

“Lmao, no.”

“Wow,” Suv said flatly. “That’s mean.”

“That’s Callow,” Mana said with a laugh. She read her text back aloud again.

“You suck, stay safe. Let us know if her or Psi say anything about Mu or Vic, please.”

“Good idea,” Liadan noted. “Hopefully they know something. I hate not knowing.”

“Me too,” Mana agreed, putting her phone away. “Especially over a few weeks.”

“Agreed,” Suv and Nao added. They all looked to Xav.

“Yeah...” he said quietly, looking out the window once again at his sister. Her team was currently studying together, with Shia appearing to be reading a series of questions aloud for everyone to answer. Faustine and Orson seemed to be competing hard with each other, as Ruben brooded quietly next to them. Temperance kept poking at him, but he had no reaction except to cross his arms harder, somehow. Xav didn’t know how it was possible, but he did. 

“Xav,” Liadan said gently, placing an hand on his arm from across the table. “You doing okay?”

“What... yeah,” he nodded and looked her in the eye. “Yeah I’m okay.”

“You haven’t started your essay.”

“Oh...” Xav looked down at his book in front of him. Liadan was right, he didn’t have a paragraph, a sentence, or even a title. 

“That’s it,” Mana said, standing up in a huff and heading to the door. Looking through the window, Faustine was now mock waving at her. Mana flipped her the bird before closing the blind on the door, cancelling any sight to outside of their study room. 

“But I wanted to flip them off too,” Nao whined.

“Do it later,” Mana scolded, sitting back down. “Now, no more looking outside, no more distractions. This is now an asshole free zone.”

“Debatable,” Nao muttered, to which Mana not so gently shoved him. He pouted, but stood down. 

“Let’s get this essay writing done, okay?” Mana looked expectantly at Xav, and everyone followed her gaze to him. He sighed, but nodded.

“Okay.”

---

As the light from the outside window grew dim, Suv got up from his chair and headed for the still closed door. He pulled back the blinds and peered through the window, looking side to side a couple of times. Satisfied, his other arm reached back to give the team a thumbs up.

“Coast is clear, they’re gone.”

“Good,” Liadan said firmly, standing up and dusting herself off. “I’m in no mood for a confrontation.”

“I am,” Nao said teasingly, to which Liadan just rolled her eyes.

“You always are.”

The group packed up their bags and headed out the door, exiting the library with further paranoid glances. Xav was standing towards the rear, constantly looking over his shoulder. It was not like his sister to just walk away and leave them be, especially when they had been just outside of their room a mere few hours ago. He had a feeling they would be seeing her soon, and the rest of the team as well. Looking back to his team, he tuned back into the conversation. 

“Anything new from Callow?” Suv asked Mana, as she was once again looking at her phone. 

“Nope,” she said flatly. “I think they got busy. That or he’s just not answering.”

“Doesn’t seem to be much to say,” Suv noted. “He doesn’t exactly have to say ‘good luck and stay safe doing schoolwork’ does he?”

“Guess not,” Mana said, shrugging and pocketing her phone. She then glanced at Liadan. “Who are you texting?”

“Nova,” she said with a sigh. “Asking if we’re busy-”

“You mean if Suv is busy,” Nao teased, elbowing him lightly in the chest. Suv looked around worriedly. 

“Don’t worry,” Liadan assured, seeing the panic on his face. “They’re out at present on a mission as well. They’re currently in the Pokemon district, something about triple battle training. She wants to know if we’re busy next week.”

“Oh... we’re not,” Suv mumbled. “But can we be?”

“I’ll say we’ve got another study session planned,” Liadan said, with Suv smiling in appreciation. As Liadan finished texting, the group stopped and looked forward. Much to Xav’s chagrin, there in front of them stood Faustine and her team. Faustine was in the front, the team standing to her sides. Xav stood to the front of his group in turn, not wanting to back down in front of his baby sister. 

“Well, well, well,” she taunted, looking over everyone in Xav’s team. “If it isn’t the abandoned team. How does it feel not having a 99er babysitter anymore?”

“Faustine, a nonpleasure as always,” Xav said dryly. “Would you mind getting out of the way?”

“We can’t do that sorry,” Orson said, a wicked grin on his face to match Faustine’s. “We want some answers.”

“And we’re not sorry,” Temperance added, glaring at Nao specifically. The two seemed to be now in an intense staring contest, daring the other to back down. 

“Answers to what? Why you guys suck?” Mana asked back. 

“We just want to know how it feels,” Faustine continued, “to have not one, but two mentors leave.”

“And the academy won’t give you missions either!” Shia piped up. “You’ve been stuck on campus for ages!”

“Abandoned,” Ruben said, breaking his usualy stoic silence. “Plain and simple.”

Xav was gritting his teeth, and looking over his sister’s team. They were blocking the corridor exit they were heading for, and he knew they wouldn’t be afraid to make it extremely difficult for them to leave. He could tell Temperance and Nao were itching to go at it, and he was more than ready to knock Faustine flat. But he knew they couldn’t do that without Faustine holding it over them. The group just continued to stare each other down, before he broke the silence.

“Why does it matter to you? You’re just jealous you don’t have a 99er for a mentor.”

“Let alone two,” Suv added. 

“Hmph, at least our mentor still takes us on missions,” Faustine said, losing a little of her cool demeanor at their comments. “More than I can say for yours. All they do is run off and play the hero. What do you do? Nothing.”

Xav’s ears flattened back at her words. Hers, in turn, perked up at seeing his reaction to her words. She went to continue, but Suv cut her off. 

“We’re not nothing,” he said boldly, stepping ahead of Xav. “We’re a team with two of the coolest mentors you could imagine. You’re the assholes here.”

“Maybe so,” Faustine shrugged, her gaze now falling solely on her brother. “But a team doing nothing is hardly worth being called a team. If you’re not helping, you’re not worth anything. Is that not right, Xavier?”

Xav was completely cut by her words. He was trembling as his team’s entire gaze turned to him. They all looked concerned for him as he slowly started backing away. Faustine let out a loud laugh.

“Pathetic.”

“Why you-!” Nao went to rush forward, but Suv and Mana both held him back. Liadan in turn stood in front of them, giving a cold glare. Xav, shaking and nearly in tears, continued backing away before running, heading down the other way of the corridor. 

---

Xav ran far, as far as he could, only stopping once he was sure he was far enough Faustine wouldn’t bother trying to follow him. He had made it out the front of the academy, and was currently leaning on one of the exit gates as he tried to compose himself. Tears were still streaming down his face, and he shivered heavily as he looked to the sky. The snow had picked up further, and it was now truly night time. His warm breath was marked in the cold sky by a small puff of fog. As he held his arms around himself to keep warm, his ears perked up as he heard a familiar voice calling for him. 

“Xav? Xav? Are you here?!”

It was Mana, which was what took him by surprise. Usually Suv would be the one to chase him after an altercation with his sister. But as Xav peered around the gate, he did indeed see the eevee virus looking frantically for him. He let out a small sigh before responding. 

“Over here.”

Mana breathed a sigh of relief as her eyes finally fell on him. She rushed over past the gate and stopped just in front of him. 

“You doing okay?”

“Does it look like it?” Xav asked, wiping more tears away from his face.

“I guess not.”

Seeing he was not really in a position to talk yet, Mana joined him in leaning on the gate. She put a reassuring hand on his shoulder as Xav continued to cry, trying to get it out of his system. After a few moments, he took a shaky breath and looked at her. 

“Where’s Suv?”

“What, I’m not good enough to comfort you?” she joked, but stopped when she saw Xav look down again. “Well, he’s kinda being chewed out by Miss Delta.”

“What happened?” Xav asked, slightly shocked. “Did he say something?”

“So, after you ran,” Mana continued. “Suv and I were holding Nao off from decking someone. Liadan tried to talk both sides down, but then Faustine called you...”

She trailed off, and Xav sighed and nodded.

“A coward.”

“Not just that. A coward unfit for leadership.”

“Oh...”

Xav had talked about it with the team before, but his wish after graduating was to one day become the leader of his clan. His mother, Clara, was his number one role model and he wanted to emulate her someday. Faustine was also intending to become clan leader, hence their intense rivarly. He knew the team knew as well; this was an incredibly personal insult and the worst thing someone could say to him. 

“So rather than Nao lashing out, it was Suv,” Mana let out a small chuckle at that. “He decked Faustine square in the jaw. It was incredible.”

“Woah... Suv...” Xav smiled at his friend’s antics. “Didn’t think he had it in him.”

“Me neither. But, unfortunately, as soon as he did that, a fight began to break out between Faustine, Temperance, Nao and Suv. And then Miss Delta walked by.”

“Oh no...”

“So Liadan told me to go find you and she’d talk her through it,” Mana finished. “So let’s hope they didn’t get detention, or we might get stuck here longer.

“Yeah...”

“Xav, I know it sucks,” Mana said, looking him dead in the eye. “That we’re stuck here right now without our mentors.”

“It’s not just that-”

“Please let me finish,” Mana cut him off, and Xav backed down. “We’ve been on campus for two months. It does feel like at points we’ve been abandoned by the school and our mentors. But we know we haven’t.”

She pulled her phone out of her pocket, and sighed deeply, tears coming out of her eyes now. “We know our mentors are out there working. Doing good work. Saving people. And putting themselves in danger for it. And you want to be out there too.”

“’If you’re not helping, you’re not worth anything’, right?” Xav laughed bitterly as he said it. 

“I take it today isn’t the first time you’ve heard that, huh?”

“Those were my mother’s words,” Xav explained. “When we were kids and learning about our place in the clan. It was more about survival in a group than anything, but still...”

“You aren’t doing nothing though,” Mana assured, taking his hand and squeezing it. “You know that. Just because we’re not in the thick of the action doesn’t mean we’re not doing anything.”

“All this essay writing sure is helping,” Xav said dryly, but he sighed and nodded. “You’re right. I’m preparing for the future.”

“Future clan-leader Xavier, master of writing essays,” Mana joked. She then wiped the tears away from her face. “You know I want to be out there with him too. Mu. And Victor for that matter. We all do.”

“And listening to my sister and crying isn’t going to do anything to help with that, right?”

“Nope.”

Xav chuckled, and in turn squeezed Mana’s hand back. The two of them then let go, and began heading back for their dorm.

“We’d better check on Liadan, hopefully she got the other two in order,” Mana joked. 

“I’m sure she would have managed. She’s good at keeping us all in check.”

There was a pause between them, before Xav broke the silence.

“Mana?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Anytime, Blue.”

“Aaaand the moment is ruined.”

---

“So then, Liadan talked to Delta,” Suv continued explaining, “And smoothed it over. So we don’t have detention!”

“Not technically,” Nao said flatly, stretching his wings out. “But we still are expected to do some charity work on the weekend for the campus fundraiser. We won’t get a record for this though.”

“I still can’t believe you punched her and I missed it,” Xav whined, looking at Suv in admiration. “You’re my hero.”

“Someone had to,” Suv rubbed the back of his neck and beamed. “I think if Nao did it he would definitely have gotten detention though.”

“Probably,” Nao agreed, not seeing any point in arguing. 

“Liadan, what would we do without you,” Mana laughed, looking over to the demon virus. She had a slight blush on her face at the compliment.

“We’d all fail and die, let’s be real,” Suv joked. Everyone laughed and nodded in agreement.

“This is my one use of teacher’s pet priviliges for the month,” Liadan added. “No one start fights for a while please, I can only work so much magic.”

As the team settled down on the couches, Liadan put on the latest episode of Haha... Unless? for the team to sit together and watch. Nao went to the kitchen to make popcorn for everyone, as had become their tradition when watching the show. Xav sat between Suv and Liadan, and let out a contended sigh as Nao and Mana joined them. His contentment was shattered at a loud knock on the door. He went to go answer it, but Liadan had gotten up first. She paused the episide and went to the door. As she opened it, a familiar and unwelcome face greeted her. 

“Where is Xav, I-!”

Faustine’s angry shouts were cut off as Liadan slammed the door in her face, before locking it twice over. Her wails rang through the door as Liadan sat back down in a huff, not restarting the episode as the group sat and waited. Eventually, some kerfuffle was heard through the door and Faustine appeared to have finally left. The team looked to Liadan, and all burst out laughing at her antics. Xav beamed at her.

“Suv was right,” he joked, bumping her lightly. “We’d all fail and die without you.”

“I can’t believe I just did that...”

Once the team had finally settled themselves, she continued the episode and the began feasting on the popcorn. Once again, Xav felt that contentment building inside him. He looked around at his team, who had his back in these kinds of situations. They understood the stress and pressure he was under, and had his back against his sister and his own inner struggles. He may not have felt like he was doing anything important currently, and for a while that may continue. But today? Today he was preparing for his future. Preparing was something. 

And that was enough for him. 

[isuzukuretsuki]

tagged by @manulanii​ (thank you!!)

Three Fandoms:

Mystic Messenger

Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly

Danganronpa V3

The First Character You Loved:

Saeran Choi................ the moment I saw him in that opening movie I pointed to him going like “Him. I love him. Can I date him?” I was devastated when I found out I couldn’t at the time

Karasuba! Awesome character design and his personality is def my type.

Amami. It’s illegal to be that hot I’m sorry.

The Character You Never Expected To Love So Much:

Jaehee. She went from my least favourite RFA member at the beginning to my favourite RFA member. My girl came so far. Also she has by far the best valentines DLC, fight me.

Monshiro. He was also meh at first too because he’s more of a spoiler character so you barely get any information on him at first. But watching his story unravel in the game and all the plot twists about him being revealed completely floored me. Everything about him touches my heart an his smile is like the sun I would die for him.

KAITO. He’s one of those characters that you can’t help but love and be charmed by because they just have such a good personality. I’d love to meet and be friends with someone like Kaito irl tbh. I can def see why Maki fell for him lmao.

The Character You Relate To The Most:

Jaehee. Her route just kills me because of how relatable it is.

Karasuba. His childhood episodes really hit home for me.

tbh all of drv3′s characters are really Out There so I’m not sure if I’d really relate to anyone. I guess in terms of personality, Himiko’s prob the most similar to me.

The Character You’d Slap:

Rika. Not only would I slap her, I’d pummel her in the mint eye court yard then drop kick her to the sun that she oh-so-loves.

KAGIHA. I DON’T LIKE THIS GUY. I could write a 5 page back and front essay as to why I don’t like him. Even Mr. Actual AssholeTM whom I won’t name is more tolerable than this guy. Def landed a spot in my list of Worst Otome Boys okay from what I know, Kagiha’s pretty well liked so I’m sorry if I made any of his fangirls cry

Kirumi. Girl has her head waayyyyy too far up her ass.

Three Favorite Characters (in order of preference):

Saeran > everyone else > Jaehee > Seven

Hikage > Monshiro > Karasuba

Ouma > Amami > Harumaki

A Character You Liked At First, But Don’t Anymore:

Yoosung. It’s not like I despise him but he’s... also on my list of Worst Otome Boys ever LMFAO but he’s lower on the list so!! I could go on a tangent and make all the Yoosung fangirls cry but I’ll keep my trap shut. ALSO throw back to the time I liked Rika and referred to her as “my type of lady” prior playing Seven’s route R O F L. It feels like such a distant past.

Nobody tbh? I guess Kagiha but mean I never liked Kagiha. I was more so indifferent to him before it became full blown dislike lol. 

Kirumi. She was actually my favourite drv3 girl until the second trial and my opinion of her just dropped to beyond redemption afterwards. 

A Character You Didn’t Like At First But Do Now:

Jumin. I mean I did like him at first but my opinion of him dropped considerably after playing Jaehee’s route and it was so bad to the point I didn’t even want to play his route. Even now I’ll still fight anyone who defends Jumin’s behavior in Jaehee’s route but Jumin’s a good man and I love him lol.

Beniyuri. She felt like a really meh heroine at first but I couldn’t help but be charmed by her as the game progressed. Also her voice.

Miu. She’s one of those characters whos really easy to dislike but once you put the game down and look at the game as a whole, you can’t help but appreciate her character.

Three OTPs:

In the Mint Eye package, lily of the valley is the flower that represents MC, and lily of the valley is Saeran’s favourite flower. I’m not saying that MC x Saeran is canon, but it’s totally canon.

Hikage x Beniyuri. REMEMBERING THE SHIT THAT GOES DOWN IN HIKAGE’S ROUTE STILL MAKES ME CRY THOSE TWO DESERVED BETTER. Literally after Hikage’s route ended I just sat there on my bed crying as the credits rolled.                                                                      Also cheating cuz I’m stating another one I also like Monshiro x Beniyuri. Their relationship is really sweet and I think Beniyuri was really at her strongest in his route. It was nice to know just how far the two would go for each other.

Oumeno. I blame twitter fanartists.

[tommyshep]

about me tag game

thank you @lesbiansebastianstan for the tag!!

how tall are you? 5′4 and im coming to terms w the fact that ill be a short ass twink my whole life its ok

what color are your eyes? blue but usually they just look grey haha

do you wear contacts and/or glasses? yup i wear contacts and i literally havent owned a pair of glasses in three years but im getting some real soon cos to wear contacts every waking hour is annoying

do you wear braces? i had them from like 6th-8th grade i think

what is your fashion style? black skinny jeans, baseball tees, baseball caps, and lots of jackets/flanels/sweaters, most all of its green and black

when were you born? april 16th 2001 (not to say april is the best but all the greatest celebs were born in april soooo (rdj, patrick stump, must i continue?))

do you have any siblings? yup just an older sister!

what school/college do you go to? i go to a community college in connecticut

what kind of student are you? im the kid who bullshits english essays and somehow gets a 105% and the teacher rants and raves and uses it as an example for the next five years.

what are your favorite subjects? im super into soc right now, but i actually really liked stats and algebra last year for some reason??? but i HATE science

what are your favorite movies? oh shit lets see uhhhh iron man iii, rent, amazing spider-man 2, scream, and the greatest showman (does life on the murder scene count??)

what are your favorite pastimes? i like reading comics and cuddling my dog, also starting to write novels is really fun (i never finish them)

do you have any regrets? hm ya i wish i had opened up more when i was struggling in middle school cos now i feel like its too late :)))

what’s your dream job? i wanna be a counselor and work with trans kids

would you like to get married? brooooooooo i cant wait to have a husband like thats the dream

do you want kids? ya definitely! i’ll probably adopt, and i think fostering sounds cool too, i would love to be at least a part-time stay-at-home dad

how many countries have you visited? uh just canada and i would probably be happy just visiting canada again i love canada

do you have a significant other? nahh but i wish, if anyone wants the job hmu

Put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping put the first 15 songs.

time machine - the click five whoa oh! (me vs everyone) - forever the sickest kids being from jersey means never having to say you’re sorry - cobra starship 5tr82he11 - mindless self indulgence apologetically - boigirl love in the middle of a firefight - dillon francis and brendon urie never lose your flames - issues i’m a disaster - ghost town veins! veins!! veins!!! - frank iero and the patience new rose - the damned bamboo bones - against me! terrible things - the ready set i love you 5 - never shout never generation throwaway - the used take cover - all time low

alright im gonna tag @heyshurii, @botanicalbucky, @starsandsupernovae, @clintbartos, @steveplustony, and @anagonyed because you guys are in my notifs a lot and ily! only if you want to ofc!