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#sorry for the rant. i know you are just trying to look out for me and i appreciate that
ghostofhyuck · 3 days
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NCT Dream when your boyfriend is a red flag.
AN: ft. bestfriend! Dreamies.
Mark Lee
Mark probably doesn't say much about your boyfriend because he doesn't want to judge your taste on men. BUT when you came to him crying because of a petty fight with your boyfriend, he'll perceived your boyfriend as a red flag. "Seriously you can do better," he said to you. Mark's convinced that you don't deserve to forgive your boyfriend because one time is enough for him to see the signs that he's a bad boyfriend to you. After that, his perception to your bf is that he's a shitty one.
Huang Renjun
Renjun has a hunch that your boyfriend is those 'nice but really manipulative' type of guys. But he just wanted to wait for you to notice it. And as if his hunch was right, you suddenly rant to Renjun one time about your boyfriend. It wasn't a fight but it's more of how his behavior suddenly shifted all of the sudden. You don't know what to do so you ran to your best friend, "I think you should break up with him." Renjun casually said, knowing that what you just said prove to him that your bf is a huge red flag. 
Lee Jeno
"He doesn't deserve you," Jeno told you as he comforts you. You wanted to surprise your boyfriend but you ended up disappointed when he didn't acknowledge your efforts. You didn't have the heart to confront him that's why you ended up crying to your best friend instead. Jeno is ANGRY at your boyfriend because how can be such an insecure loser that couldn't appreciate your effort to him? He thinks that he's such an asshole for doing so. But right now, what's important is you, so Jeno tried to comfort you as much as possible. :<
Lee Donghyuck
Haechan lost count how many times you cried because of your shitty boyfriend. From the start, it was so obvious that he was walking red flag, but you being so in love with him, ignored all of it. You would cry to your best friend but assure him that at the end of the day, you and your boyfriend will make up. "Aren't you tired from crying?" Haechan asks bluntly. You were surprised with your best friend's words but he just wanted to be honest and blunt with you this time. He'll end up telling you that you should just break up with him. 
Na Jaemin
"Is it my fault? I really don't know Jaemin," you let out a sigh. Jaemin hums quietly. "He's wrong, it's not your fault." your best friend answered with all honesty. Deep inside, he was like a volcano ready to explode. He's mad with your boyfriend who gaslighted you that it was your fault that he cheated. What a jerk! Jaemin thinks. He looks at you who's trying to hold back your tears. "Break up with him, he cheated on you yn! Isn't that enough for you to leave him?" but he was only answered with your cry, so Jaemin only rolled his eyes as he pats your shoulder lightly. 
Zhong Chenle
You and Chenle were having a small talk outside the club. You two were a bit drunk and you overshared at how you and your boyfriend fought before you went to the club. "Honestly when I first met him, he's kind of an asshole you know?" Chenle pointed out. "Really? Why didn't you told me?" you asked. "Just want you to discover it for yourself." he explained. You only let out a sigh, thinking if it wasn't for your best friend pointing it out for you, you would've missed how huge of a red flag your boyfriend was. 
Park Jisung
"Yn honestly stop it," Jisung started after you calmed down. It was one am and you're in your best friend's dorm room, crying because you found out your boyfriend was cheating on you AGAIN. It's been going on for so long but you love him that you always forgive him. "Do you know how much it hurts me to see you cry because of that asshole?" Jisung asked with an angry tone. "I'm sorry Ji," was the only thing you could say before tears stream down again. Jisung rubs your back gently, thinking that it's better to comfort you first. 
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bbbuckaroo · 3 hours
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At the end of the day who cares if the buddie shippers have a problem with Tommy and keep making up (annoying) theories. We have to realize they exist in an echo chamber and have done nothing but annoy Tim multiple times. Tim loves buddies friendship but you can clearly tell he’s fallen in love with Buck and Tommy’s romantic relationship, which is why he added Lou into these last two episodes ( which isn’t easy as Lou was only contracted for 4 episodes which means having to renegotiate additional contract). We have got to stop letting them annoy us by trying to bring in the cast and crew as a reason to why Lou is hated and why he’s not sticking around. We have to look at the fact and know that they (buddie shippers) will never acknowledge that Lou has been treated very differently than Bucks former love interests when it comes to the cast and crew already.
• There’s a reason why Lou is being included in behind the scenes content.
•There’s a reason why the official account is following along with the main cast.
•There’s a reason why Tim is posting and responding to messages about him.
•There’s a reason who since 7x06 that the cast (Kenny Ryan and Jennifer) have turned away from taking about buddie (romantically) in official media interviews and have redirected the conversation to BuckTommy.
•There’s a reason why Ryan keeps bringing up buddies platonic relationship and calling Eddie hetero.
Sorry for the long rant but it’s just something I thought of as I was reading your other responses.
Exactly, we shouldn’t and can’t care about what they think. I love your reference to an echo chamber, that’s a great way to put it. I anticipate the more we stop caring and interacting then they’ll end up destroying themselves because they have to get negativity somewhere, even if it’s from each other. You can already see it turning into a Buck vs. Eddie over there.
Tim has literally saved this show, I was honestly terrified going into this season after the dumpster fire of S6. Since he’s come back the show has a new life and he has let the characters truly shine again. And you can definitely tell he is proud of his (and whoever else’s) choice to bring Tommy back. I definitely respect him doing it as a little “experiment” with the two episodes to see how it was perceived and boy did we deliver!
I 100% agree that, among all the other things, we need to ignore their attempts to involve the cast. They know we feel the need defend the cast so they push that agenda. It’s clear they love you and as always it their opinion that matters most!
All those reasons are all the ones I have seen and agree with. This is all very strategic and honestly, the award show reel was what solidified it for me, both having Lou with the fast and having him end it (mostly because we all passed out and they wanted us to see the other cast too)!
Rant away, I really appreciate constructive rants that give others insight into the ship. It really helps us understand the reasons for this behavior which only further helps us ignore it! So thank you for it ❤️
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danganphobia · 13 hours
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Hiii 👋 Saw that you're taking requests. Have you seen the second prompt on the "angry confessions" post? I think it suits laishuro nicely 🙈
"I can't leave you alone for one second without you hurting yourself, can I?" Toshiro grumbled.
Laios laughed sheepishly. "I mean, I'm fine so it's okay-"
"No, it's not okay!" It was nightfall in the dungeon, taking shelter for the night when Toshiro had asked Laios to see the healed wound on his forearm from the golem attack that occurred earlier, taking the party by surprise. Toshiro and Namari saved the day, and if it weren't for them, Laios would've been crushed to a pulp. "Not when I feel like I'm going to go batshit fucking crazy, thinking you've hurt yourself."
Laios went silent, watching Toshiro examine his arm. He nervously glanced at Toshiro's angered face, eyebrows twitching, worrying at his lower lip.
"Ah..." Laios chuckled, a faint blush on his cheeks, scratching his head. "Sorry about that. I really worried you back there."
Toshiro glared at him, unable to fight the urge to reach over and tug on Laios' stupid nose, watching him squirm and whine in protest.
"Worry is an understatement, you fool!" Toshiro hissed, careful to not wake up the other party members. "I'm always running all over the place, saving you, you should be able to save yourself..." He ranted on, and a long exhale escaped his lips. "And what if something were to happen, and none of us are around?"
"Shuro," Laios called his name, his voice so gentle it caught Toshiro off guard. Toshiro gathered the courage to look his nuisance of a companion in the eye, ignoring how it made his chest tighten, his throat dry, and his heart pound. Was Laios' eyes always so captivating, like bathing in pure gold? "I'm never worried when I get hurt, because I know you'll always be there to save me. You protect me, and for that, I can trust that you'll be by my side, right?"
Toshiro opened his mouth, gawking. Laios blinked in confusion.
"Why's your face so red, Shuro?"
"Such nonsense!" Toshiro exclaimed, vexing. "You are a skilled warrior, so act like it, for God's sake!"
Laios laughed. "Aw, thanks! So are you!"
Toshiro could just strangle the man right here. No one would know. That was if Toshiro tried as hard as he could to hide Laios' body. Party members looked out for each other; they protected each other. He couldn't just leave Laios to die, throw him to the wolves. Skilled or not, someone needed to keep an eye on his blindspot.
It just so happened Toshiro had to be his knight and shining armor. If he had told Namari about this, she'd just poke fun at him for pretending he didn't care. You'd save him in a heartbeat and you know it, she had said once.
And it wasn't just her, sometimes, Falin thanked him for protecting Laios every now and then. Marcille as well.
They trusted Laios to be Toshiro's responsibility, and there was absolutely no other way to put it.
Toshiro scooted away from Laios, lying on the blankets, feeling himself grow weary.
"Toshiro," he mumbled, turning to his side. Laios hadn't lied down yet, feeling his presence looming over Toshiro's form. "My name. It's Toshiro."
Laios hummed, before he repeated, slowly. "Toshiro."
"Yes. Toshiro."
"So, then, it's not Shuro..." Laios figured. Then, he gasped, startling Toshiro. "Shit! I didn't realize I've been calling you the wrong name all this time! Why didn't you tell me?!"
"Keep your voice down you imbecile," Toshiro scolded, hearing rustling as Laios got into his blankets, unusually closer to Toshiro than before. After Laios went quiet, he confessed, "I don't know why. Everyone had gotten used to it already..."
"Well, I can get used to Toshiro," Laios insisted, stubborn as always. "Besides, I like Toshiro a lot more. Sounds pretty... Toshiro... Toshiro..." He murmured to himself, trying to memorize every syllable, so it would permanently burn into his mind. He sounded content, determined, as if he had nearly forgotten everything else that happened today.
Another blush blossomed on Toshiro's cheeks in the dark of the night.
send me a prompt and i'll write you a drabble!
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strawberryscorp · 7 months
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albus comes home after having a bad day and collapses into scorpius's arms
scorpius could be doing anything but he'd pause and play with albus's hair while letting him rant about his day
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anthropwashere · 6 months
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I've gotten two letters from my mom since my aunt died last month and they've both been just. So, so aggressively manipulative. Y'all can skip this post. I'm not looking for sympathy likes/replies. I just need a good rant and sometimes it does pay to yell into the Tumblr void.
Still—still!—she insists I have never told her why I refuse to speak to her anymore. She has the receipts on this, going all the way back over a decade ago to my early 20s when I conceded to communicate to her solely through e-mails. That avenue of communication ended with me blocking her pretty much everywhere online after she called me a sociopathic bitch on a public platform family, friends, and coworkers followed me on. Very cool of her, very mature.
(If memory serves she was arrested shortly thereafter. Pity it wasn't for something more serious than, jeez, I can't be assed to remember. Something to do with her driver's license? I know she asked me for a couple grand about it and cussed me out when I told her my baby Airman ass literally did not have the money even if I were inclined to help her.)
Every single letter she sends me includes a brief tangent about how she's been watching YouTube videos about estranged families (both sides! she always includes the both sides!). She always says she wants to understand but she can't because I've never told her why I refuse to talk to her anymore.
How many phonecalls, how many HOURS, have I wasted crying in rage and despair as I try to tell her all the ways she hurt me, physically and emotionally and mentally, before I realized she'd never accept it? That she would always, always try to gaslight me like this? That she'd give me that guileless, wide-eyed and furrowed brow anxious stare and that high, plaintive goddamn voice. That she'd convince me time and time and time and time again that maybe, maybe I'm overreacting?
This most recent letter was a real treat. She went out of her way to say she wasn't trying to guilt trip me, really, but she's JUST lost both her sisters AND her parents in the last year and she's terrified she might die soon next so WHY won't her ONLY DAUGHTER just TALK to her? 😭
So, firstly. I can only speak for myself and my interpretations of what my extended family will feel, but I'm pretty goddamn sure we're all gonna CHEER when she finally fucking kicks the bucket. Ain't nobody gonna miss her when she croaks. Even if her sisters outlived her that'd be the same. My only complaint when she does die is that I'm gonna insist on paying for all of the funerary expenses because she's already leeched too goddamn much from the rest of the family. No way is anyone gonna pay for her bullshit one last time, even if that means paying folks back with interest after I fly back to California. And you can be sure I'm gonna go out of my way to take the cheapest route possible at every opportunity out of spite. This woman doesn't deserve better than the bare minimum. That's all she's ever given everyone else after all.
Secondly, I will concede the fact that yes, she's lost both her sisters in the last year, not even a full year apart from each other. And that sucks! It's extremely fucking sad! My aunts raised me as much as she did, and they both sure as hell paid for more of my childhood needs than she ever did. I was able to afford to go to my younger aunt's funeral last year, but even with the surprise disability backpay I got this year I've been dealing with a lot of owning-a-100+-year-old house expenses (such as replacing the entire goddamn original roof) this year, so I genuinely couldn't make the trip for my older aunt's funeral. Two family members offered to pay for my flight and I just couldn't accept that kindness because I grew up watching my mom take and take and take and take from the family.
THIRDLY HOWEVER.
Her mom, my maternal grandma, died TWENTY YEARS AGO. Her dad, my maternal grandpa, died THIRTY YEARS AGO. And she hated her parents! She fucking loathed them! I spent more of my childhood being her psychologist instead of her goddamn child; ALL I HEARD ABOUT was how much she hated and resented her parents. This is THE first time I've heard her trot them out since I lived with her back in the 00s, and it might damn well be the first halfway-positive mention of them since long before that? This is so transparent an act I can't help but be insulted that she'd think I'd take the bait? Using the LITERAL DEATHS of others to try to goad me into talking to her?
Like. Jesus. Last year at my younger aunt's funeral just about every single member of the California-centric family pulled me aside to ask if my mom was being too much. My aunt's CHILDREN, damn near non-functional with grief, asked if I needed help handling my mom. And there were a couple occasions where I damn near admitted yeah! She's being too much! She won't stop fucking touching me! She won't stop making her sister's death about herself! And here she is, a year later, doing the same goddamn thing again with her other sister's death!
She's a manipulative, gaslighting abuser who refuses to grow up and accept responsibility and/or repercussions for her actions despite being in her late-60s. She gleefully twists the knife into whoever she can get her hands on and acts SO distraught and SO betrayed when people find fault with her actions and behavior. I don't know a single person who knows her to like her anymore once she's shown her true colors, and somehow she's still convinced she isn't the problem.
What a waste. What a fucking waste.
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lystring · 9 months
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just love that amongst all the insane pushback people have been getting lately for talking very openly about fatphobia in our society which is a serious problem people are straight up reblogging posts adding severely triggering images of extremely anorexic people as some sort of Gotcha, like fatphobia Cant be real because Look how mean people are being about this person who is clearly dying from one of the worst diseases born Out Of Our Fucking Society Being Fatphobic im losing my mind what is happening etc
#like i dont think ive ever talked about this on this blog or ever#but i used to be DEEP into proana tumblr back in the day like.#most of us didnt consider ourselves 'proana' or 'probulimia' or whatever but it was a fucking lifestyle and it was a dark hole#that i had to claw myself out of#and im sorry its extremely triggering that people are harping onto posts TALKING ABOUT A REAL ISSUE THEY DO NOT EXPERIENCE#with images of severely diseased women sayin Well Actually Your Experiences Arent That Bad Cus Look#We Also Have It Bad#yeah well#one does not detract from the other#and also Maybe. hmm. there is a correlation...if not even causation........#maybeeeee if fatphobia wasn't such a huge issue....you wouldn't feel the need to...idk avoid experiencing that...#cus like okay I know im only speaking from my own experience but#seeing the way society treated fat people growing up constantly surrounded by people on Diets all the time#trying to Avoid being fat at All Cost#miiight have contributed to my ED and wanting to be skinny#like.#honestly moving away from those spaces and being friends with and following people that experience fatphobia#has heloed me in soooo many ways to just like accept myself a bit more and also realize the enormous damage#that fatphobia does to us through media and social media like#im honestly just ranting rn but god im so mad#I saw like One Too Many posts like that but didn't wanna jump on being annoying so i made my own posr#im sorry for anyone going through it rn being stuck in proana or fitblr whatever hell#because like it wont make it better. it will feel like your only escape because People in your life wont understand#but it will just continue to pull you in until nothing else or no-one else mkes sense#and that is Not Good or okay and yeah#talk to someone outside of this site about this please#don't argue with others talking about their own experiences that you cant relate to because if you somehow#like#see that as an attack on you personally#thats a problem...you need to address that.
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dentist-brainsurgeon · 2 months
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I delayed my haterism for 2+ weeks and honestly at this point I just kinda don't care anymore so I'll just lay it to rest here
Long story short like a month or so back I found out my brother who I haven't talked to in 8 years is a V Tuber through my dad and I was apprehensive watching at first but eventually decided to pop in his streams not logged in just to see how he is nowadays and he seemed better! He's retained his enjoyment of whatever he's playing and who he's playing with while also not getting irritable quickly(like me) like he used to, and he (seemingly) wasn't/isn't a bigot anymore as I noticed he did have queer friends he would play games with, so there has been definite improvement since he's been going to therapy for roughly 10-ish years now, with all the context out of the way, onto why I'm so... Idk
Roughly 2+ weeks ago I drew his V Tuber and asked my dad to send it to him, he did, and for over a week I saw no sembl of a response, so during a call from my dad, I asked him if my brother said anything yet, and no, my brother doesn't respond very quickly, which is believable considering that yeah, while he and our dad are on good terms, doesn't mean that they'll talk ALL the time, so I gave it some more time and still nothing. Sure, maybe he will eventually, and yeah, there's been 8 years where we haven't talked and bad blood, but at the same time, I extended an olive branch in the form of a drawing that comes down to "Hey! I like your V Tuber and what you do!" And while I wouldn't expect anything big, but just.... A "nice." Or "cool." Would suffice, at this point it's clear as water that he saw it and chooses not to say anything. Idk maybe I'm overreacting and overthinking but I just wanted to try and reach out in a way I thought he would like, maybe he'll eventually say something but I honestly doubt it at this point
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fingertipsmp3 · 6 months
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I wish all food service workers who are weird about regulars always ordering the same specific thing and tease them for it a very “please don’t do that”
#was just thinking about when i first started my exchange year & there were basically 2 eateries on campus#i mean one of them was a giant food court with a bunch of options like burgers; sandwiches; salad etc#the other one was just a basic diner. i really really liked the diner because the food arrived fast; it was super good#and it was really close to where i lived. so every time i went in i got a hot dog and fries. and i went there for dinner probably every day#it took maybe about 3 days for the girl at the counter to start recognising me; knowing i was going to get the same thing each time;#and screaming ‘hot dog and fries????!?!!’ at me every single time i entered the building. which; if you’re like me and grew up with a weigh#problem and body image issues; fucking HORRIFYING. like why are you announcing to the whole diner what i’m going to be eating#i kept trying to show up when she wasn’t on shift or ordering something different and then i eventually just stopped going there#i kept going to the cafeteria because i could fix my own plate and the lady who weighed your plate (you were charged based on that)#never commented. but the cafeteria food was SO bad#i ended up going to the burger bar to just get the premade chicken tender baskets but those started to gross me out after a while#so i ordered a custom burger this one time and the guy was looking at me kind of funny for my order (i wanted a grilled chicken burger#with no cheese and just lettuce; onion and mayo on it) and one time when i went in i saw/heard him notice me and immediately start telling#his coworker about how ‘weird’ my order was. like i’m sorry i’m bri’ish and therefore don’t have the american propensity for shoving#a ridiculous and unnecessary amount of ingredients into any given sandwich??? sorry that i hate tomatoes and the idea of chicken and cheese#together horrifies me. i guess.#sooooo i started going to the sandwich bar and they were lovely. i ordered pretty much the same thing every day and the girl acted like it#was brand new to her every day. she also spelled my name wrong in a new and different way every day. and always added a smiley face#one time she put so much tuna mayo in my sandwich that i had to go get a spoon to eat it with. i hope she’s well#i just… i don’t know where i was going with this rant. i just hate being teased about what i eat bro#like whenever i like a food it’s ALL i want to eat for the next three months and i know that’s boring and not healthy but i don’t care!!!#why do YOU care. i don’t care and it’s my fucking body#you can let me eat my hot dog and fries in peace without announcing it to the whole diner. that is something you canndo#personal#*i feel like someone is going to accuse me of criticising food service workers. hiiiiii i’ve been one :)
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hella1975 · 1 year
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happy eurovison!! do your stretches!!!
babe it's been days since i did my stretches at this point im too scared
#in my defence idk WHAT was going on with my sunday shift bc i only waitressed 7 hours and that's a pretty normal shift for me#like im aware compared to a normal person it would be very difficult to just out of nowhere expect them to be on their feet#walking back and forth the entire length of a restaurant regularly carrying heavy things all the while keeping up ABOVE AND BEYOND socially#for SEVEN ENTIRE HOURS with ZERO BREAK like masking that entire time on top of the 7 hour physical workout#like it's insane if u think about it for more than 2 seconds and im really trying to bc every time i falter i beat the shit out of myself#and like? NO? my job is actually very physically demanding and emotionally draining compared to most people's day-to-day activity#it's gonna have impacts sometimes!#so yeah long story short i finished my shift sunday and when i tell you my legs LOCKED UP in bed that night#like mainly my thighs but it was all in my hips and knees and it was so bad that i lay there until 2am before getting painkillers#bc i couldnt hack it#which is SAYING SOMETHING for me bc im normally both quite good with pain and also a hardass for taking painkillers#ive had that happen once before (again after waitressing lol) & never worried about it but my mum recently got diagnosed with arthritis#and ever since ive been like. Looking at my own joints any time they even HINT at playing up#like i am RENOWNED for inhereting all of my mum's medical shit from mental to physical like i KNOW i'll get it it's just a matter of when#and yeah that was sunday it's now tuesday and my thighs STILL feel bruised#and im like. embarassed about it bc it's not like i did anything spectacular? and idk why it's happening?#yeah idk hiiii rori did u like me ranting about my physical health in ur stretch reminder ask sorry do u still think im hot <3#ask
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sarcasticmirage · 8 months
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I'm feeling my fma 03 obsession returning and just putting it out there that if you're a brotherhood prefer-er, who needs to tell 03 fans how much better it is:
don't
mainly please don't just say it follows the manga, I SWEAR that whoever was posting about it already knows that 03 doesn't and I'm also pretty sure that they don't care
#DEATH OF THE AUTEUR#vent rant in tags#this kills me#its so frustrating#i also hate whenever i make 03 content and there has to be someone in the comments talking about how much better brotherhood is#i know its not that serious but it just sucks that i can't even talk about 03 without people acting like i just don't know basic shit#about a show that ive loved for years and made multiple amvs for#if someone is making 03 fan edits or any fan content for 03 they ARE aware of bh#it just sucks when im excited for a comment and i know people aren't trying to be mean or condescending but even stuff like#“while 03 was okay you should really look into bh it's more manga accurate”#oh ill get right on that let me just finish the ties that bind the fifth fma light novel#oh while ur waiting for me to try... what did you call it? Brotherhood? check out my conqueror of shamballa scenario book!#sorry its mostly in japanese but it wasn't ever fully translated#having merch and completionism doesn't make me a better fan#but its really fucking annoying that bh fans always act like 03 fans just dont know better#of course all of this doesn't apply if someone asked#and of course 1 still applies (just making content for 03 isn't permission for you to come in saying how much you hate it)#but if you have to critique 03 to a fan out of nowhere#at least say SOMETHING different#nothings beyond criticism (we can talk abt cyborg archer)#but an adaptation not following the source material is NOT A CRITIQUE on its own#you can say how the changes hurt or even ruin the story in specific ways#BUT THE CHANGES ARE NOT THE PROBLEM THEMSELVES when judging a series as a piece of work#fma 2003#also this is mainly a problem on tiktok not yt for me
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angryscreeching · 5 months
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i love life so much
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...partially considering holding off on posting AWLB part 2 until I've got like, the whole thing written, and re-read/reworked in places fully.
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dethbug · 2 years
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does your mood ever just get completely ruined remembering every embarrassing thing youve ever said
#the amount of times ive made shit attempts at fitting in at work through the mutual teasing everyone does but like#going in way too hard and making everyone uncomfortable#i love when i do that#or when i say something really fucking stupid that makes me laugh but everyone just kinda looks around in silence#also another favorite of mine 💔 FUCK MAN#i know people joke abt being awkward and stuff but THIS AINT QUIRKY#THIS IS EMBARRASSING . AND JUST PLAIN AWFUL#like one time i was messing around and my boss was making jokes abt how hes my favorite or something#and said something abt getting a hug from me (not as creepy as im describing#i really just dont remember specifics)#and i deadass said 'i have never wanted to hug you a day in my life' AND EVERYONE WENT 😶 and i walked away BFJFJG#MF LITERALLY FOLLOWED ME INTO THE BREAK ROOM TO BE LIKE 'hey we're cool right'#LIKE BRO I DIDNT EVEN PICK UP ON HOW AWKWARD IT MADE EVERYONE FEEL UNTIL AFTER I WAS LIKE...YEAH DUDE I WAS TOTALLY JUST KIDDING....#*painful realization of how unfunny it was to say that*#WHICH HONESTLY. unfair bc i can name a coworker specifically thats mean as shit on purpose as a joke and has made fun of me multiple times#LIKE HE SAYS HARSHER SHIT AND ITS LANDED IDK HOW THE FUCKER DOES IT 💔#maybe i should just not try and joke like that#its just so bad idk how to relate to people or. be natural and just hang out#how tf do people just DO THAT.#anyway sorry for the huge rant i just needed to get it out of my system bc holy fuck man 😭 ITS SO BADDD#bug.txt
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jeannedarcgerard · 1 year
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sochilll · 2 years
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appreciatingtokrev · 2 years
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okay so i.. just gotta vent/rant. don’t read if you’re uncomfy? also brief tw! suicide mention in the 2nd last paragraph
i can’t exactly tell you why yet, but god, i’m not okay right now. i’m angry. sad. hurt. i feel played. yk, my ex is abro & genderfluid? i think? at least their insta says that, tho idk how often they update that. but his whatsapp pfp currently has an mlm & a trans flag on it, so, at least rn, they’re trans mlm and i think he goes by he/they? and, like, i’m happy they’re comfy in his identity and all that shit. like, pop off, ig. nice you can be you. but i feel so fucking played by this goddamn bitch. at least i’m now 100% sure that i’ll never ever go back to them no matter what?
when we were in a relationship (that was uh 8 months in 2020/2021, from october until very early june) he basically forced the label 'woman' onto me. back then, they were a non-binary lesbian going by they/she, i think. not too sure about the pronouns, but that doesn’t really matter. the problem was the label lesbian. they knew well before our relationship that i identify as demiboy. and for me, there was nothing lesbian or wlw about that. i identified as omni ace, with a pretty big mlm lean. they knew there was zero girl in me and still identified as a lesbian, saying i’m an 'exception' and all that stuff. tbh, i don’t think he ever saw me as anything that doesn’t include girl or is heavily male. and, idk, i’m just fucking angry. because, now, after a year, he’s fucking gay. they’re identifying as a person that could be attracted to me with labels that i’d be okay with in a relationship. (like, idc if you’re lesbian & attracted to me. kinda contradictory with my identity, idc tho. but as soon as we’re dating & you’re a lesbian, i’m not comfy.) it’s fucking with my head, fr. why?? why could he never be gay for me??? why did they have to be lesbian?? i forced myself to be genderfluid for them. we called our relationship lesbian because he wanted to. i ignored all of me and tried to identify as a non-binary lesbian for them, just so he’s comfy. and now, suddenly, he’s fucking mlm.
i know they aren’t at fault for identifying the way they do, but it fucking hurts. like, i made myself out to be a whole other person for 8 months!!!! eight!! while not comfy at all!! and 4 out of those, i wasn’t even happy, and only stayed bc i was 99% sure he’d go kill himself once i break up and i was so fucking afraid of that!!!!!
i can’t fucking put the shit i’m feeling right now into words. i’m not livid. i’m not bawling my eyes out. i guess i’m just angry. pained. disappointed. hurt. idk. but not happy, not happy at all.
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