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jeonfiles · 3 years

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once more to see you | kth 01

pairing: taehyung x reader ft. seokjin

genre: angst, fluff, unrequited love

synopsis: taehyung is the complete opposite of you, and you're so in love with him. he's not interested in you at all, but he's willing to pretend so he won't be known for breaking the sweetest girl in school's heart. he knows you'll end up hurt either way.

warnings: taehyung is an idiot, a lot of pining, y/n is annoyingly dependent on validation, y/n does a lot of silent prayers, y/n is a track star, childhood bsf seokjin (cute), mentions of deceased family member

music for this chap: she had the world , carry me out

a/n: taehyung will disappoint u in the beginning but hes cute i promise

"I get why you like him Y/N," Sohee swallowed the rest of her sandwich before finishing her sentence, "He's so hot. People say he's interested in you too, y'know?"

Sohee visibly tried to get food out from the back of her mouth using her tongue, and it made you chuckle at the sight. "I don't think he does." You sighed, resting your chin in your palm.

You were both situated at the table in the inner corner of the cafeteria, with a full view of who walks in the door, and sometimes you swore you could see Sohee drool when attractive guys walked in that exact door.

"Hello, of course, he does! Even his friend Jimin told Kang Seulgi from Class 1, who told Go Euntaek in class 3, who eventually told his girlfriend Baek Ho-rang who ran to me to tell me the great news." Sohee gasped for air after rambling, and you rolled your eyes,

"Stories change when that many links contribute." You scoffed, sitting back in your chair and reaching for your juice box on the table, taking a huge slurp, which you knew would annoy Sohee.

"You don't believe me? Guess we gotta ask a link closer to the source then." Sohee stood up from her chair, and you looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Park Jimin, get your ass over here will ya?" She nearly shouted across the cafeteria, and now all looks were pointed at you two, and you felt the urge to just slip down the cracks of the floor tiles and hide there forever grow stronger for each nanosecond.

You sunk further down on your tacky, orange chair, but you could still see Jimin's black locks sway a little over the crowd as he walked over to the table you were sitting at.

"What's up sugar?" Jimin smirked at Sohee, and Sohee didn't even budge, and you had no idea how she did it. He was stupidly attractive and could make any girl drop her pants with a comment like that.

"Jimin my dearest, a little birdie told me that Taehyung likes my sweet Y/N, could you confirm?" She batted her long lashes and smiled prettily at Jimin.

He looked to the left, sucked his teeth, and said, "I can't, I'm sorry." You realized you had grown a little too hopeful, and your heart sunk quite a bit when he spoke.

"Does he think I'm pretty at least?" You spoke up, eyes shining when you looked up towards the standing Jimin, the harsh lights in the cafeteria reflecting in them.

"He hasn't mentioned you much, to be quite honest." He shrugged, walking back to his table, where Taehyung and the rest of his friends sat.

Your heart thumped when he met your eyes, and you looked away in panic. The rest of lunch was just Sohee apologizing and you avoiding eye contact with any of the students at the nearby tables.

Jimin mentioned you and Sohee's name several times, he was a loud speaker, and you were so scared of what he was saying you could probably die right then and there.

Saved by the bell, you picked up your stuff and got ready to start running to your classroom, praying you wouldn't meet any of Taehyung's friends, and especially not Taehyung as you ran Usain Bolt style.

You looked down while running, not thinking twice about leaving your best friend behind, you suddenly fell to the ground with a thud. This was surely not one of your glory days.

When you looked up, you wanted to cry. It was none other than Kim Taehyung, and he didn't look pleased. You gathered your things and muttered "Sorry." under your breath probably about 10 times, and he just watched, disappointingly.

"You're a klutz. Why were you running?" He spoke, and your knees turned into jelly when you tried to stand up, you nearly fell and dropped all your stuff again, but he caught you by the arm, straightening you up like it was nothing.

"Uh... Uhm... Err..." you mumbled, and he rolled his eyes, and not in a joking manner. "Fuck that, why are you going around telling people I like you?"

Your breath hitched, and he stared at you coldly. "I didn't! Gosh, my friend Sohee told me someone had told her that you liked me, and- uh... We asked Jimin, and-" He put his hand over your mouth, making you shut up.

"I don't want you two to go around making up baseless rumors about me, it's incredibly annoying for me to go around correcting people who assume shit just because your little friend speaks louder than a bunch of hyenas at a tea party." Taehyung nearly spat, and you took a step back.

You noticed that people were listening in, their stares burning holes in your back. He was livid, and you didn't understand why, you just smiled, praying to god that this would end soon.

"I just thought you liked me-" You began, and he interrupted you, "You thought I was gonna like someone like you? Get over yourself and enter the real world."

The hallway went silent, your lips trembled as hot tears raced down your face, and like the track star you were, you fled the scene and passed the finish line into the bathrooms.

You stayed till the school day ended, not knowing what was unraveling outside the four walls of the stall.

Sohee 💜: 01:12 pm

Y/N, where are you? i heard what happened :( i hate taehyung im gonna chop his sausage off

Sohee 💜: 01:38 pm

taehyung is fighting w doyoung because doyoung decided to defend you this is hilarious

but fr where are you

Sohee 💜: 01:57 pm

doyoung gave taehyung a black eye damn

doyo is on the verge of tears when taehyung said you liked him and not doyo

taehyung cant not have feelings for you like there must be smth deeper going on

Sohee 💜: 03:39 pm

class just ended i'll wait out back

Sohee always knew when to leave you alone, so she did, partially. You usually shut off your phone when you're upset, but she still sends you texts to update you whenever you turn it back on.

This time, it was quite dramatic, and you rushed out of the icky stall and ran (again) to reach Sohee to get the full story, and as you expected, it was interesting.

"Basically, Doyoung punched Taehyung and Taehyung was a little too OP, so he failed to initiate a fight, so it just turned into Taehyung being an ass to Doyoung for defending you." She shrugged, adjusting the straps of her leather backpack as you walked home.

"Taehyung's rep is so tainted right now, I don't know how he's gonna fix this my dear Y/N, so I guess he got his karma. He's an idiot and I'm glad other people are starting to see."

You nodded yes, pushing out a fake chuckle, while silently you prayed that everything would soon be back to normal and that Taehyung would forgive you for the mess you caused.

Being in love with Taehyung for a year had taken a toll on you, and your best friend since freshman year had noticed too. You were different.

You used to be so independent and optimistic, but now you would strive for validation, and you had turned into one of the most insecure people Sohee had ever met.

Sohee tried to pull you away from him, but to her demise, it only got worse when you tried to meet other guys. She figured that the only way for you to disconnect from him was if you had your go with him, or if he treated you like a complete idiot.

You waved goodbye to Sohee as you entered your house, kicking off your shoes and throwing yourself down on the couch. You wanted to scream, but you saw your brother's and another guy's shoes in your hallway, so you kept it inside.

After having watched an episode of Seinfeld, you could hear the floorboards creak, and your gaze found its way to the hallway, where your brother, Yoongi stood, peeking out from his door.

"Ah, Y/N, you're the one who's home?" He smiled brightly, eyes turning into small crescents, which made you awe at the sight.

"Yuppers." You said and sat back again, pressing play to start the next episode. "Who's your guest?" And as you uttered your last word, another head peeked out from the door, and you couldn't help but feel the happiness brew inside you.

It was Kim Seokjin in all his glory, and this time, he looked even hotter. It had been about two years since you last saw him because he moved to Germany to study medicine.

Seokjin had been your neighbor since you were born, and you pretty much grew up with two older brothers who always took care of you.

No one dared to mess with you, because Seokjin and Yoongi always got to them first. That way, you grew up without a care in the world, protected from all evil.

You had no idea when you fell in love with him. It was somewhere during puberty, where your interest in Brad Pitt and Kim Soohyun from Dream High had grown stronger.

You remember Seokjin was scouted for modeling, acting, and even idol groups all through your childhood. He did a few ads, photoshoots, a popular teenage drama called Double Trouble, and even managed to get his own Wikipedia page.

There was no doubt that Seokjin was an attractive man, and in the two years he had been gone, his face fat was completely gone, and he had defined cheekbones, a slimmer and tighter figure, and you thought he couldn't be any more perfect.

"None other than God himself," Seokjin said smugly, opening his arms to greet you with a hug, and you threw your blanket you were covered into the side as you bolted into Seokjin's arms, legs wrapped around his waist.

He slowly put you down so your feet touched the parquet, and you felt a kind of euphoria as he smiled at you again, the same smile he had flashed you as long as you could remember.

Everything about Seokjin had matured and changed, but his smile remained the same. "What are you doing back?" You sniffled, holding back the happy tears that were forming in your eyes.

"Hey, don't get me wrong, I love Germany, but it's a little bland. I miss ahjumnas complimenting me on the subway and the bomb ass food here in SK." Seokjin grinned as he wiped a tear that fell down your face.

Yoongi was leaning against the door frame, smiling at the grand reunion. You knew he liked seeing you two together, and you had a small suspicion about him shipping you guys.

"Please don't ever leave again." You gripped onto his shirt, digging your face down in his chest, and he said, "I swear to god if you're wearing makeup right now-"

You laughed as you pushed him away, placing your hands below your chin and batting your eyelashes dramatically, "I'm all-natural."

"Naturally pretty." Seokjin leaned forward and whispered in your ear, and your heart did a little somersault.

Seokjin's always been a charmer.

You woke up in your room, pink sheets draped over your half-naked body as tons of messages poured in on your phone, vibrating so much it nearly fell off the edge of your nightstand.

You grab it while rubbing your eyes, and you're shocked to see the messages that had exploded on your lock screen.

Unknown: 08:39 am

Hey, it's Kim Taehyung.

Look, I'm sorry for the shit I said to you and I would love to make it up to you in some kind of way.

Maybe I could take you out?

I get it if you don't want to, but I heard you were interested in me so...

What kinda food do you like? Activities, hobbies?

I really wanna make this right :)

You: 08:43 am

oh hey! I'd love to, you kinda owe me one. if it's your treat, I suppose we could get some sushi and boba...

btw I don't like u like that

Contact made, saved as "taehyung <3" at 08:44 am

taehyung <3: 08:47 am

Okay. Meet me at Nori Table at 6 pm. Don't make me wait.

Your heart was palpitating, and when you pressed your phone up to your chest, you could feel your body heat up from your scalp to your toes.

Maybe Kim Taehyung had no interest in you right now, but he sure would after tonight. You were gonna make him love you, soon enough,

Running to the shower a few hours of Seinfeld later, you scrubbed with all your might with your newest strawberry scrub, did your makeup, curled your hair, and sat down on the couch, outfit draped over the armrest of the chair.

It was an hour till you were leaving, so for the time being you sat with hair rollers in your hair, dressed in pink sweats. Seokjin and Yoongi had been awake all night, you had heard them laugh and play Mario Cart all night, it reminded you of old times.

Old times where you went to bed crying because Yoongi and Seokjin's bedtime was later than yours at sleepovers. Thinking back, your parents made a pretty rational decision, but you resented them for it.

When Seokjin left for school in Germany, during your Sophomore year you cried again. You thought it was so unfair that you had to be two years younger, why couldn't you come with him?

You were painfully in love with him, and you had been probably since you were. A few months after he moved, your feelings faded. You were love-free, only to fall stupidly in love again with Taehyung just a year later.

You were forced to snap out of your train of thought because you heard the floorboards creak again. When you looked over at the dark hallway, you saw a tired, yet familiar face smile at you.

Seokjin looked quite disoriented, hair ruffled and eyes puffy, yet he looked like a Greek god. Sculpted to perfection, he smiled at you like he did yesterday and all the times before.

"Morning." He grunted out, his morning voice prominent. You chuckled when you looked at the time, feeling kind of bad for Seokjin who had slept away the majority of his day, which you knew he didn't like.

"It's 5 pm, cutie. Mom said you guys could order takeout, cause she's working late." You stood up, and Seokjin gave you a good look up and down, and then diverted his gaze to the lavender ruffle skirt and white long-sleeve blouse you had neatly hung over the armchair.

"What's the occasion?" He nodded over at the clothes and then your hair rollers and full-face makeup-covered face. He threw a few walnuts from the little bowl on the coffee table into his mouth.

"It's none of your business, but I have a date tonight," you said smugly, and a walnut flew out of Seokjin's mouth in shock.

"A date? Like a real one?" He frantically asked, and you nodded as you walked away with your outfit in hand.

You came back out minutes later, and Seokjin had to hold his mouth shut so it wouldn't drop to the floor. You had matured so well, a white blouse adorning your waist, and the lavender skirt hugged your curves nicely.

You had decorated your neck and ears with golden jewelry, and you had a pair of Air forces dangling from your left hand. You were beautiful, hair let free from the hair rollers, curls swaying as you did a twirl.

"It's alright, I guess." He pretended not to care, and your proud grin morphed into a frown pretty quickly, and he noticed.

He stood up and walked towards you, standing very close. His tall figure was hovering over you. Seokjin leaned forward towards your ear, not whispering this time,

"You're gorgeous." He pushed your curls behind your shoulder, adjusting your golden necklace as he returned to Yoongi's bedroom.

You were screwed.

The time on your phone showed 6:06 pm. You recall him saying ‘don’t be late’. What a hypocrite. It had started to pour down, so you were squeezed up against the brick wall of the restaurant so the ledge above you would shield you from the rain.

You were shaking from the cold, legs exposed because of your skirt. Sighing deeply, you reached down into your purse to text Taehyung, but when you looked up, you saw him running over to you.

He was holding a bouquet of pink delphinium and peonies. You’d always been interested in flowers, and this small gesture made you all fuzzy inside.

“I apologize for my late arrival m’lady. The flower shop was about to close down for the day, and I had to beg the cashier to let me in, promising to buy a huge bouquet if she did.” He smiled as he stood in front of you.

“No worries sir, I haven’t been waiting for long.” You chuckled, as you accepted the bouquet. His eyes scanned every inch of your body, and he said, “You’re shivering. Let’s go inside.”

This was a side of Taehyung you had barely seen before, caring and warm. This was also the side of him that initially made you fall for him.

The memories of him reading stories for children at the hospital was heartwarming. Whenever you went to visit your brother, who has now passed, you would see him read stories for all the unlucky kids.

Your brother, who was only 7 years old talked about Taehyung like a superhero, and it seemed as if Taehyung’s stories were the highlight of his days at the hospital.

Daejung wasn’t a kid you would pity. In his last months in the hospital he never once cried. You believed that Taehyung was a big part of the reason.

That’s why you fell in love with him. He hadn’t been a superhero in the form of saving lives, but he definitely made a whole lot of sick kids happier.

How could you ever repay him?

Taehyung rested a hand on your shoulder and lead you inside the door, and there stood a beautiful tall woman, black hair to her waist, almond-shaped eyes, and full lips.

She was beautiful. You looked up to see Taehyung’s reaction, and he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking at you. His eyes met yours, and you could’ve sword the whole world stopped.

“Excuse me?” An unfamiliar voice spoke up, and it kicked you right back into reality. It was the pretty woman speaking, an even prettier voice to match her.

“Do you have a reservation?” She questioned, smiling so genuinely from ear to ear. “Yes. It’s on Kim.” Taehyung spoke so confidently.

“Ah, for two. I’ll be your server tonight.” She waved for you to follow her, and before she turned around, you saw her name tag.

Bae Eunmi. A pretty name for a pretty person. Of course, she had to be pretty. Your confidence sunk even lower, and your insecurities grew.

“I’m not interested in her, by the way. I’ve talked to her before. She’s all beauty and no brains. Not for me.” Taehyung whispered into your ear, possibly to reassure you.

You sat down at the table and ordered a huge plate of different types of sushi, maki, nigiri, uramaki, and even sashimi.

This restaurant was fancy, nearly too fancy for your liking. It was huge and flashy, and it made you doubt your outfit choice completely.

The restaurant fell silent since there weren’t many guests here this early. The silence wasn’t awkward between you guys. It was just, too silent, and you decided to break it.

“Do you still write stories?” Taehyung’s face froze. How did you know about the stories he wrote? Had you been stalking him? Was this when everyone would find out how weak he truly is?

“How did you find out... About them?” He asked hesitantly, fidgeting with a small woven basket with bread placed on your table.

“When sun and moon met, moon felt bad. When the moon was alone at night, he cried, because he wanted to shine just like the sun.” You quote his story word by word, it was your favorite paragraph.

He looked at you with a confused look and his eyes told you that he wondered why you knew the story so well.

Before he could speak up, you said, “My brother's name was Daejung. He looked up to you and constantly told me about how he wanted to be like you when he grew up.” You placed your hands on top of his over the table.

Taehyung was speechless. He sat there, body completely frozen as he processed what you just said. The little boy he had mourned for many months was the same flesh and blood as you.

“Daejung told me how he wanted me to marry you because he thought no one else deserved me.” Letting go of his hands, he continued sitting completely still.

First, he felt disappointed in himself. Disappointed of the way he had treated you, how sad Daejung would be if he knew.

Second, he could see him in your traits. Your button nose matched his completely, and your eyes sparkled just the way his eyes did.

Third, he realized he had to take care of you. Fall in love with you, for Daejung. Taehyung had promised the little boy to take care of his friends and family when he has at his worst.

His expression completely changed. It softened, and his eyes looked at you like you were godsent. He believed you were too. It was fate.

join the “once more to see you” taglist

a/n: u guys know the angst isn't over lol u guys r never gonna see the light at the end of the tunnel ! this chapter was originally a bit longer but i have to test the waters and seeing how u guys like it !! pls reblog <3

#taehyung ff #taehyung angst #taehyung fluff #bts imagines #bts ff #bts taehyung #taehyung x you #taehyung x reader #bts v #seokjin angst #seokjin ff #seokjin smut #taehyung smut #fuckboy!taehyung #popular!taehyung #bts x reader #bts x oc #bts

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agusvedder · 4 years

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I DON’T CARE if this doesn’t get any notes. I need to vent.

My name is Agustina, I’m 27 years old. I’m a nonbinary, queer, latinx person, parent of a 4 year old, non-verbal authistic child. I suffer from depression and anxiety.

I’m 9 thousand kilometers away from the woman I love.

I’m not a victim. I am a minority. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

I started watching Supernatural in 2015, you know, being a stay-at-home parent, who dropped her career and her job to live the first years of their child, there wasn’t much I could do in my free time but to watch a show. I caught a few episodes of season 11 on tv and then I decided to start from zero. I always acknowledged how problematic it was in terms of representation, but always saw small threads of light filtering in the message it sent, recognizing how its writers were trying to shed a little light, creating a jenga tower of storylines and new characters, only to be thrown away by poor, useless deaths and the erasure of said characters.

Since my first run on season 1 I related to Dean. I saw myself on him. (I will never be as brave and cool as him tho, never ever, but his personality traits, some of his family issues, his self worth issues, his loneliness, his unaddressed childhood trauma, his growth in a circle of violence, his reticence to address his feelings until he explodes?... Yeah. There are days where my girlfriend makes fun of me saying “Ok Dean”). I kept looking up to Dean in his geekiness, in his way he always put his life on the line to protect the people he loves and put them always first… even in the supernatural side of the storyline, he still was profoundly human and abnegated to the people in his life. Also because I’m deeply in love with Castiel but that’s another subject. Thanks to this show, I’ve found people in my own country who now I recognize as my family beyond SPN, who helped me accept myself the way I am, who are always there for me. My found family, my chosen family. Because family don’t end in blood, because family cares about you, not only for what you can do for them, because that’s what all of us have in common, and why this show resonated as strongly as it did for us. That’s why we found each other and ourselves in the process, in a circle of love, support, non-judgement and willingness to find a family in ourselves when our own blood relatives ignored us, abused us, refused to recognize us. We’ve found love and family. I’ve found the woman with whom I wanna spend the rest of my life with because of this show.

That’s the power of this story. I know my small circle is not the only one who lived this, who continues to live it.

I can talk about this forever, but there’s something I wanna talk about specifically here. When the ending aired.. what I felt was… like a bucket of cold water was thrown over my head. You know when your parents come home, or call you and give you the devastating news that someone you love died? that exact feeling. The adrenaline, the heartbreak, the feeling of loss.

The whole season 15 and 15 years of storyline were completely overturned. The misogyny the writers tried so hard to erase, it was there again, in a faceless woman who was supposed to represent the person a lead chose to spend the rest of his life with, reduced to a lilac dress, a blurry face and a uterus. We never seen acknowledged the existence of Eileen Leahy, Sam Winchester’s romantic interest since season 11, his perfect partner whose disability wasn’t an obstacle for her to be a badass hunter. (BUT COVID!! <- No. Eileen Leahy appeared in two episodes this season without Shoshannah being on set: Last Holiday and Despair. If they wanted to include her, they would have. They didn’t because they don’t give a FUCK). Sam Winchester is an academic, a witch, a leader, a powerful hunter, a kind human being, and the ending that was given to him was living an unfulfilled life, dying at a ridiculous young age, having a son only to replace his dead brother? It was sad. Sammy deserved better. He always did.

My beloved Dean Winchester, who I love so deeply, who taught me a lot about myself, about life, love, family, about *ejem* VICIOUS CIRCLES and the power of breaking free from them, of learning to embrace one’s self, our real tastes, our real identity, to come out of a shadow of being reduced to someone’s caretaker instead of having an identity of our own, to spend life loving family the healthy amount.. well, he was killed in a ridiculous way, on a milk run of a hunt. After being eager and ready to kill himself so many times. After all he’s been through, after saying he’s good with who he is, after considering retirement, after standing up to his dad, saying he already has a family, ready to cut the “I’m Okay” bullshit, address his feelings, his trauma, don’t letting those define him. He deserved better. He always wanted a family, he always wanted to break free from the version of himself he was created to be, “daddy’s blunt little instrument” (For fuck’s sake, he even said it in the same show 10’ before dying, man. If we don’t keep living, the sacrifice the people who died for us did, was for nothing). Are you telling me this man really would refuse his brother to call an ambulance? Refused his brother to get the first aid kit even knowing it was more serious than his brother thought? He was ready to live. He CHOSE life, and at the end his choice was stripped away from him. He clearly was a bisexual man and they never explored it.

Cas. The misfit. The fish outside of the water. Ambiguous gender and sexuality. Finally makes a homosexual declaration of love after all he’s been through. After being brainwashed, used, suicidal, isolated. After telling Sam and Dean he loved them more than once, that they meant everything for him. After confessing he’s been in love with Dean since he pulled him out of hell…. Was erased from the story. Erased, literally. Two emotionless mentions aren’t enough for a 12 year old family member who pulled both brothers out of hell, who died for them more than once, who until 2 seasons ago he didn’t even feel like he belonged there ‘cause he was never told he was loved. No one ever told him “I love you” back. Not Jack, not Sam, not Dean, not Mary. No one. Ever. And still, he died for love. And with his death, he was erased from the finale, being that the first finale Castiel wasn’t in since his appearance on the show. He deserved better.

All roads lead to Rome and you know what we got at the end of that road? a bottomless pit of NOTHING. The building up towards a different end isn’t just in s15. It’s been there for years and years. And if you watch the show, you see it at plain sight.

Sam Winchester hurried to die to reunite with his brother in heaven EVEN WHEN HE SPENT 30 MORE YEARS WITH A WIFE AND A KID he only wanted to die to go back to his brother? it’s insane, it’s ridiculous. That’s not what the show has been about for seasons now. SEASONS. The road was paved towards a healthy brotherly bond, each brother living their future the way they wanted, finally breaking free from the curse John dropped on Dean that Sam’s destiny was in his hands. No no. What was that? Did it ever happen? Was it a fever dream? They really destroyed everything in 38 minutes of the finale?

Stupid.

Representation is important, stories are important. They change lives. You know how it changed mine? After I saw Jonathan Van Ness coming out as non-binary, I started to realize how I never called myself "a woman, a girl" or anything like that, how my "female presenting" aesthetic changes drastically depending on how I feel when I wake up how I always called myself a "person", no gender involved. I realized I was a non-binary person even after becoming a parent. Thanks to Jonathan Van Ness. Thanks to seeing a person like her being unapologetically herself.

Representation matters.

It matters.

It helped my mom understand me when I was 13 and had a girlfriend. It helped my dad educate himself about trans identities. It helped my sister understand about her demisexuality. It helps break circles of ignorance and stereotypes. It helps people process what these characters wanna tell, and realize they're human beings above it all. We suffer, we laugh, we grieve. We love. We exist.

Supernatural missed a chance to be a historical show in terms of representation. And it breaks my heart. I cant believe they decided to erase Dean's sexuality, to erase Castiel after saying loud and proud he's in love with a man, to erase Eileen whose disability only was a disadvantage when they KILLED HER in the most ableistic way in s11, to never show Charlie and her girlfriend again, that they decided to make God bisexual AND a villain, thay they decided to turn the only regular non-binary character of color into the villain too (Billie).

I'm still grieving.

This is why "a stupid show" is so important for me, and for lot of people like me. Cause representation can change lives. Stories can change lives. It certainly changed mine, and I'm not the only one.

Don't let anyone tell you you're just a butthurt fan because you're suffering this ending. Every one of us have a story and this is mine. All of us are valid, our feelings are valid. And we'll get through this eventually

#SPN ending #personal experience #castiel #dean winchester #supernatural #sam winchester #Long post #sorry

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shycabbit · 3 years

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when news is bad and worse...

So... I have had a very stressful 5 days. My husband was once again hospitalized. He feel in the bathroom and went unresponsive. His blood sugar had somehow dropped to 57 even though he had a big supper and even had some sweet tea. When I called the paramedics they tested his bloodsugar and it dropped even farther... to a horrifying 38! They were able to get his sugars back up by the time they got to the hospital thankfully but while there they told us some really scary news.

“I’m sorry Mr. Lane, you have a acute kidney injury. From what we see from the labs and scans it looks like its been bad for quiet some time.” Now Kris has had swollen legs for a about a month but that comes and goes due to his diabetes and lack of movement but its never been to bad till this last week. We didn't think much on it other than making sure he wears his compression socks and elevates his feet. But at the hospital we find out the swelling is due to his kidneys and he has about 12 liters of fluid in his legs and stomach. So they kept him to give medicine to help him drain the fluids. Today before Kris was discharged his new kidney doctor talked to us and told us that Kris will need to be put on dialysis soon due to the kidney damage... it was also the only way for him to be put on a kidney transplant list due to us not being insured (currently unemployed still sadly...).

Kris is only 44 and he is going to be put on dialysis?! We had his bloodsugar finally under control for the past 4 years, our diet at home changed to help him with it. I cant believe it... I tried to not to cry in-front of Kris because I didn't want him to freak out from me freaking out but its so scary.

I know most people don't care about my problems and I’m not asking for anything I just needed to talk about this to help me cope with this crushing anxiety and depression. Sometimes its good to to scream into the void even if you know noone will respond.

If you took the time to read this... bless you.

#personal stuff #health #mental health #shouting into the void

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shuatoyou · 4 years

Text

one last summer - l.c

[day 38 of a tct summer collection]

✗ pairing; chan x reader

✗ genre; fluffy fluff and angsty angst :p

✗ wc; 3900

✗ summary; each day is spent counting down until the end of summer, you do this every year but this time around, its harder to watch the days go down knowing once the count hits zero, its time for him to go.

✗ song; pink skies by LANY <3

✗ a/n; i cant believe this is my longest fic yet ?? i hope u guys like it !! i chose to write for chan kinda on a whim bcos i dont do that a lot and he is just the best angel ... also i thought i should involve a little bit of my signature angst for my first writing collab with my best friends if u wanna see amazing stuff click below to travel to . . .

A TCT SUMMER COLLECTION *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

the alarm ringing at a time you would never find yourself awake during summer, it could only mean you had an important day to look forward to.

today was the beginning of the countdown to the last day of the last summer you had together.

“chan, wake up,” you mumble sleepily at the boy, who was in a deep sleep at the foot of your bed. he scrambled about for a second before going completely still. of course he was back asleep.

you groan at the sight of him cuddling into the blanket, even more in spite of your attempt to wake yourself up and him at the same time. although, it was cuter than you wanted to admit. perhaps your heart went slightly crazy... but that was another issue for another day. or never.

“fine don’t wake up loser, i’ll eat pancakes on my own.”

hearing that, he jumps straight up “i don’t think so.” he glares at you while you sit under the warm blankets amused at his reaction.. he sighs in defeat once he realises it was all a play for him to wake up. of course you wouldn’t indulge in a beautiful breakfast without him.

morning flies by, and before you know it noon comes around. the clock reads three pm and you’re both sprawled over the couch binging ‘a silent voice’ for the nth time. the entire movie makes you sad but after watching it so many times you become immune to the tears.

chan on the other hand, doesn't. like always he finds himself getting teary at the same scenes every time. perhaps that was one of the qualities you adored in him: he never hid how he felt even if he hated the teasing that came with it.

after deciding on a whim you didn’t want to waste the day inside, you switched off the tv and threw a box of tissues at the emotional boy.

“what was that for?” he whines, throwing the tissue box off him.

“wipe your tears. i wanna go out,” you smile cheekily before skipping off to get your shoes on, shortly followed by chan.

“we’re going out in sweats?” he questions, pointing at the lazy attire you had both become accustomed to everytime you were together.

you shrug, grabbing the keys off it’s special hanger. special because it was made by chan himself when you were both in the second grade and making matching key hangers for each other's houses was sentimental you could say. or as your parents said.

when you were both younger, they were convinced you two would grow up together and maybe get married in the future. the two of you became inseparable over a short amount of time - all because of the one day he offered you his juice carton after yours had been stolen by the class bully in the first grade. that was almost twelve years ago now and that same boy was still standing in front of you.

“what are you thinking about?” chan nudges you as the two of you walk down the same road to your usual frozen yoghurt place.

“just some stuff,” you shrug.

“like?”

“pre-school.”

he hums in response, and you take this as an indication to go on.

“our parents really dealt with our crazy friendship the daily playdates... imagine if we ended up how they wanted us to.” you smile fondly, the thought of it all was enough to plaster an expression on your face.

“don’t remind me, they would’ve married us the moment we turned 18 if we left it up to them.” he chuckles. “they think we were meant together”

“do you?” you retort.

“do i what?”

“think that?” you ask not facing him. you would rather not have him fully see the crimson building up on your cheeks.

“i don’t know, i guess. we've been friends for so long, i've never thought about it.”

you nod understandingly and walk the rest of the way in silence, a comfortable one at that. there was never anything else when the two of you were together.

maybe that’s why you didn’t want to let go yet.

“BEACH DAY!”

“ugh, do you seriously have to scream that down the entire hallway, y/n?”

“yes because it’s beach day!” you yell one more time, forcing a reaction out of him but your amusement quickly dies down after feeling the soft impact of your pillow in your face.

“heh”

chan proudly walks out the room leaving you dumbfounded but you quickly scramble back onto your feet and chase after the boy jumping on his back earning a grunt from the much taller male.

“you suck.” he groans

“be careful you are in my territory little boy” you snicker signalling to your house which had been the location of the endless sleepovers for the summer holidays.

“speaking of, i really should go back home and pick up some more of my stuff before we leave for the beach.” he mentions as he lets you down from his back and the two of you take your seats by the kitchen island.

“oh that’s fine, want me to come with you? i miss your mom anyways.”

“don’t you have your own beach bag to pack?” he asks, grabbing a plate which mimics his actions and starts piling up your plate with his favourite breakfast stuff before passing it over to him.

“i can do it later” you smile now making your own breakfast plate. chan looks down hesitating with it.

“nah it’s okay, i’ll be back quick anyways” he mumbles, picking at the food making you lift a brow without saying anything as you delve into your own happily.

he didn't want to upset you but the small little things you had been doing for him had been harder to let go of as time went by.

however it's not long before breakfast is over and chan waves a quick goodbye before leaving for his own home for the first time in ages. it was quite normal for the two of you to spend a large amount of time at one and others houses both families gave up in trying to send you two back to your respectable homes.

meanwhile you spent the time he was gone packing your own beach bag consisting of the usual tower, sunscreen and one of the disposable cameras you bought for summer memories documenting. chan had laughed at the big box that arrived at your house a month ago especially when you told him it was a box of eight disposable cameras.

“you have your phone plus a polaroid camera, why do you need disposable ones?” he asks curiously prodding at the box.

“these ones come out cuter don’t judge. plus i’ll give you one or two that we use during the many adventures for you to process and hang up the pictures in your new room” you look up at the boy hopefully as he sighs in defeat.

giving yourself a little round of applause you open up the box and immediately grab one of the cameras pulling chan closer to get a selfie.

“this one is to mark the start of our summer adventures documented by a disposable camera.”

shaking your head you pull yourself out of your daze right on time as the doorbell rings. you only assume it’s chan and you’re right as you open up the door to the boy with his hands filled.

you take one of the bags from his hand letting him into the house.

“what’s all this?” you ask curiously trying to look at the bags as best as you could through the little openings.

“extra clothes, stuff for the beach and snacks my dad brought back from japan for you. he said he forgot to give them the last time”

excitedly you rush over to the bag he held up to you, japanese snacks were one of your favourite and chan's father had made it a regular occurrence to always bring you back some after his long work trips away in osaka.

which was where the family would be moving by the end of summer hence why the two of you spent each day doing something new counting down the days till the moment he stepped onto a plane without you.

noticing the sad look on your face while you looked at the snacks longingly chan threw an arm around your shoulders.

“what’s with the look? come on we’ve got waves to catch y/n”

“i'm gonna miss you” you pout and his gaze softens pulling you away from the bags and into his embrace allowing you to relax in his arms for a bit. he thought this would happen one way or another but he only expected it when it was the last day.

“are you ready to go?” he whispers while rubbing your back and you almost wanted to say no just to be able to stay like this a little longer but nevertheless you pulled a way nodding beginning to walk over to the bags so you could put them away into the car.

the drive to the beach was only peaceful, which was normal when it came to you two. just endless music and comfortable silence but you knew the tension in the air would not decrease anytime soon due to the nature of this entire summer.

“will we still talk when you leave?” you blurt out, failing to face the boy currently sat in the driver's seat.

“why the sudden question?” his face evidently changed to the questioning look he’s always had when he was confused about something.

you shrug and he doesn’t question furthermore which you appreciated because it would’ve been tough having to explain the endless worries in your mind.

reaching forward for his phone you scroll through his playlists until you find the one song that the two of you often found comfort in when together or apart.

“we have seriously got to get over this song”

‘shut up, i love you’

you laugh at his statement but that doesnt stop the two of you from singing along to the lyrics like it was your own song. you occasionally turned to the other watching him nod along to the song, your heart was in pain. how could you let go of him so soon?

‘you're my best friend’

another morning, another day crossed off till chan had to leave by the end of summer. the thought of him leaving soon made your stomach churn to the point you wanted to scream. so many unexplained feelings and yet you had to act like everything was okay and making the last few memories this summer would be nothing. you had no energy to get out of bed and do anything today even if you knew that the day would just go to waste.

“so what are we doing today? making more memories?” chan asked right on point with your thoughts almost teasingly.

“you ask that as if i have no reason to do this.” you mumble turning away from the boy and nuzzling further into your blanket.

“there's still time before i leave y/n”

“not enough though, chan.” you finally turn back to him, frustrated that he couldn't understand why you were so keen on spending time with him.

“yeah but i don't want to do all this just for the sake of time, i want to do it because we both love spending time together. don't we?”

you nodded pitifully, struggling with the real reason why it was harder to get through summer. your feelings were a factor in it all but you couldn't find it in you to tell him.

“can we just spend today at yours?” you asked softly, scared if you raised your tone it might betray you somehow.

this time it was his turn to nod before moving closer to you, unsure of what he was going to do. you looked up at the boy who only brought you into his embrace once again, causing your heart to do countless backflips.

“you’ve been giving me a lot of hugs recently.”

“mind your own business”

you giggle, letting your breathing steady at the pace of his. your mind drifts to the fact somehow you only felt this way when he was the cause of it.

he couldn't help but smile to himself when you let go in his arms, allowing him to hold you, physical affection was never a common thing in your friendship.

‘i think our hearts are starting to show’

“let's get ready to leave, hm?” he spoke, almost in a whisper as you pulled away and met his eyes. they had that usual sparkle in them. the one you adored.

his house, you were always warmly welcomed by mrs lee who treated you like her own child, perhaps that's why you and chan’s friendship was able to last as long as it had, your families ordered each other as much as the two friends did.

“i was wondering when he would bring you around again, how’s summer been so far?” his mom asked as you took your seat on one of the island chairs like you usually would while chan went to grab a bottle of water for you and him.

“it's been okay” you smiled at the woman now sitting across from you with a kind smile waiting for you to continue. “we’ve just been chilling you know how it is.”

“has he confessed his undying love for you yet?”

“mom! what the hell?” chan exclaims in shock trying not to choke on his sip of water and you sit there stunned.

“i'm joking sweetheart” she reassures the two of you noticing the red on either of your faces, giving you a knowing smile before turning away which lingers on your mind slightly longer than you would have wanted.

it takes a moment for chan to calm down and when he does he drags you out of the kitchen to his game room hoping to get away from his mother's endless teasing.

“god, i'm sorry i hate when she does this.” he runs a hand through his hair expressing his frustration and you chuckle nervously.

“does she say this stuff all the time?” you wonder, taking your seat on chan’s gaming chair making him sit on the bean bags on the floor. but he doesn't seem to pay any attention to it while he recovers from the past events.

“sometimes, it's always stuff like when am i going to ask you out or confess or something crazy you know?” he explains, fanning himself.

something crazy… the words stung momentarily as you thought about anything happening between you guys would be crazy to him. nothing would happen anyways, not now.

he shakes his head while walking over to plug in his monitor, “my mom truly believes we’ll end up dating.” he laughs to himself but you only go red at his statement, turning around on the gaming chair dangling your legs trying to distract yourself.

he frowns at the way you turn around but does not question it any further, instead, he picks up two of his game controllers and puts one in front of you before settling back down into the beanbag.

“what are we playing?” you ask finally turning back around

“mario kart?” he states more like a question though and you agree, leaving the gaming chair to sit beside him on one of the other beanbags.

you couldn't help but think how much you were going to miss this, zoning out as you think of the last time you two played.

“if i win, you have to fulfil one of my wishes, and if you win then… whatever you want.” chan writes it all down on paper kind of like a mock contract and you laugh as he slides it over to you to sign.

“please don't wish for anything crazy or expensive” you beg jokingly.

the only response you get from the boy is a simple wink which directly sends the butterflies into your stomach like every other time he does something.

you guys start your game and immediately the tension rises as the two of you compete for first class, occasionally nudging each other to throw the other off.

“i am going to win this, i promise you.”

your words lose all meaning as the big number two appears beside your character and you huff, mad at the fact you lost to chan once again who had managed to secure first place. it was frustrating how good the boy was at this game.

“what was that?” he lifted his hand to cup his ear teasingly waiting for you to repeat your previous statement.

you shove him away from you and cross your arms still salty at the loss.

“i think i choose to use my wish now.” he looked at you now.

“fine, what is it lee chan?” you kept your arms crossed as you also turned your body to face him.

“i’d like a kiss.”

you never expected to kiss him that night, and even if it didn't make things too awkward afterwards it only made you sure of the feelings that grew for the boy.

“wanna make a bet if one of us wins?”

you look at the boy stunned at his suggestion.

“did you forget what happened last time?” you ask fiddling with your fingers.

“yeah we kissed, no big deal right?” he turned away to turn on the game and you sat with your face evident with disbelief.

“really? no big deal?”

“huh?” he looks at you, puzzled.

“friends dont just kiss…” you try your best to explain but it felt like it was going over his head from the way he looked at you with so much confusion.

standing up, you unwantedly raise your voice “all summer you keep filling your head up with these things like we can never date and all of that rubbish after we literally kissed not so long ago, does that not mean anything to you?”

“it wouldn't matter anyways, i'm leaving. i’ll be gone soon.”

“that doesn't mean we won't stop talking. you said so yourself.” you fretted with a pleading look.

he looks at you saying nothing and you can only scoff feeling all the blood rush up to your head in anger before opening the door to leave. staying would only make things worse and you knew he wouldn't try and resolve anything if you did.

“where are you going?” he calls out as you’re about to go down the stairs with tears of frustration filling up your eyes.

turning around, you respond quietly to the boy, “is that all you’re going to ask?”

“what do you want me to say, y/n?”

you laugh in disbelief and struggle to keep yourself from choking out any tears, “i’ll give you time to think about it.”

with that you make sure to compose yourself enough to wave at mrs lee with a big smile by the time you’re down the stairs and she responds with a pitiful one, she most likely had heard you both. letting yourself out, you also let out the breath you’d been holding, leaving your childhood best friend all alone for the first time this summer.

walking home all alone was the worst part because your overwhelming emotions would not stay inside of you causing you to spill every sadness filled tear onto the pavements you walked on.

you made your way inside your house and without greeting your parents you locked yourself away to wallow in your sorrows for that entire weekend occasionally letting your mom in to comfort you without telling her the reason to your sadness unaware that at one point your parents worriedly notified chan you weren't feeling good sometime, it was only till you heard your mom softly knock on your door to tell you the said boy was waiting for you downstairs.

your heart wouldn't quit racing in your chest as you opened the door to her soft eyes begging you to talk to him after realising whatever happened was something to do with him. so you follow her downstairs, making your way into the living room where chan was sitting uncomfortably on the couch hoping for you to show yourself. you walked as slowly and quietly as you could trying not to notify him of your presence but that didn't work when you heard his voice call out your name making you shut your eyes tight in pain.

“i know you’re there y/n please talk to me”

freezing on the spot you decided not to go further into the room in fear of bursting into a sob at the sight of him. so you sit on the floor behind the wall separating you two.

“im listening.” you call out as quietly as possible.

“i'm assuming you’re not going to come in, that's okay.” he nods to particularly no one, perhaps himself.

it was silent as chan inhaled deeply, thinking about how what he was going to say would change things.

the atmosphere got more awkward by the second which was a new feeling for the both of you, never once had there been such a moment together.

“i'm sorry”

“i’m sorry we never sat down to talk about our feelings much lately. i feel like everythings been about me and the fact i'm…” he stopped mid sentence he was hesitating although it was inevitable one way or another you would be hearing this out loud again.

“i'm leaving y/n and i don't want to leave without telling you that you do mean more to me than just a best friend.”

your eyes widened in shock as you stood up hoping to run away from this situation but chan was one step ahead of you as he held onto your wrist, a gentle but burning touch that pulled you back towards him.

“maybe i'm too late but i'd like you to know later than never. so please say something?” he pleads, searching your eyes for some sort of a non verbal answer while waiting for you to speak up.

“you’re leaving next week… good luck.” you whisper, straining your voice enough so it wouldn't break. “im sorry too.” you pull out from his grip and walk off to your room without making eye contact with your mom who stood by the staircase with a pitiful look, all meant for you and the boy you left standing alone in your own house.

and when he left you knew that was the last time you’d see him.

“chan? you’re home quite early. how was y/n’s?”

he looked at his dad with a blank expression and shrugged his shoulders, his mom hadn't told him she saw y/n leave upset.

“it's going to be tough but i hope you’re both ready to say your goodbyes soon,” he smiled, giving his son a pat on the back.

if only it was like that and if only he could go back to reverse all the stupid things he said.

the blank feeling burdened you also as you caught a glimpse of the photos you had already gotten processed from your disposable camera.

letting go now would make it easier for the two of you when the time came though in your heart he would still be the most important person for a while until he wasn't. maybe in another world something would be different so the two of you wouldn't be where you are right now, instead in a much happier place.

perhaps in that happier place you would’ve said goodbye…

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blanket-hole · 4 years

Text

Im calling this the faberry files cos I feel like a spy when I'm really just very gay

This is just basically timestamps of every faberry moment I could find as I was rewatching season 1-3. I don't know if anyone wants to see it but I just put it here cos why not. I wasn't really planning on posting it but here we are so it features my gay ass commentary. Anyway there u go.

gay ass looks-

-1x04- so far I’ve seen a gay ass look Quinn gives Rachel at 35:36

-1x05-39:50-not that gay but a little bit, also long

-1x09-43:02 she looks so adoring

-1x10-during endless love

-1x11-9:37 voiceover is mean but just look at those eyes and tell me I’m wrong,34:00 she literally looks so adoringly I can’t

-1x12-10:41 pretends not to see her only to look straight (or not) at her

-1x15-35:02 they’re even talking about love at the time and sitting weirdly close for enemies

-1x16-41:30

-1x20-43:06 I can’t really see where she’s looking under those long ass lashes but I think when Rachel does that little giggle she stares at her while smiling, might just be Faberry goggles tho

-1x22-9:05 I think thats like the cutest smile my little gay heart, 14:23 Quinn is fully checking her out rn like not even subtle they’re on stage

-2x04 16:12, 41:48 at Rachel singing

-2x07-23:19 that could in no way be regarded as a platonic look of enjoying the song, especially since its just started

-2x09- 43:04 part of dog days but its just so cute them holding hands also weird since they are still meant to hate each other lol

-2x10-6:03 this could just be my Faberry goggles but im counting it :D, 31:20 staring at Rachel while she looks sad

-2x11-11:04 could be at puck but she was looking at Rachel before when they were further apart so imma take the w also Diana looks really cute in this bit

-2x16- 4:27 is being kinda mean but also the way she looks at her <3<3<3 :DD also 5:21 if u don’t want to wait through a bit of a scene and the look then is suuuuper gay, 43:17 she looks so proud of her girlfriend :DDDDD

-2x18-52:49 she looks like such a proud girlfriend in this bit

-2x21-1:29 its only a quick look from Quinn tho

-3x06-28:26 Quinn gives Rachel the GAYEST lingering look at the end of the song (unless my eyes deceive me but I don’t think they do cos I’ve checked like 3 times :DDD)

-3x07- 25:00 this is possible the outright gayest look from Quinn ive ever seen, its during one of the songs but I had to put it in

-3x08- 41:10 the look of joy on Quinns face when Rachel touches her shoulder is just pure gay energy

-3x14- 17:27 ‘for the rest of my life’ looks at Quinn, ffs just get married already, 24:07 she literally bites her lip like wth how is this not canon

-3x19- 39:08 kind of but Quinn looks really happy when he says Rachel Berryand its so cute

Scenes together-

-before I had this idea- the “eavesdrop much” talk, and a couple of other things e.g. the ru Paul scene and the sweetie scene.

-1x05-41:59 during somebody to love weird foot tap thing

-1x06- 18:34 gay ass looks as well, 22:58

-1x07-21:45, 28:53 (the you obviously have a lot you need to express scene), 32:07 they just get wierdly closer for no reason

-1x09-26:09 not much but still

-1x13-3:06, 11:01

-1x15-34:18 sitting really close together next to each other when they’re meant to not like each other?

-1x20-5:42 they also sit really close and a bit of gay staring

-2x02 35:40 (on left of stage next to mike) they’re seen really close and talking, 38:55 standing unreasonably close and also in weird positions for a conversation, 31:28 Quinn looks really sad when Rachel sings to Finn (could also be a Fuinn thing tho so idk)

-2x04 28:11

-2x08-9:44

-2x13- 30:51

-2x14-8:19 its shortcut the level of gay panic on Quinns face is enough for its own spot

-2x15-0:03 how closeted is it to be the only two in the celibacy club fighting over a guy that neither of them want or need lmao I just think its really funny

-2x16-9:31 the level of gay panic on racehls face when she says she’s right is just a mood, 22:27 I think this is a scene about miscommunication and Quinn blatantly states that she thinks Rachel is much better than Finn and that she believes in her I have a lot of feelings about this scene but ill leave it at that

-2x17-16:20

-2x18-2:38 not much tho, 10:53 they’re being civil and touchy feely also leads into pretty/unpretty, 21:50 when it pans to Quinn it makes it seem like it would be a Fuinn jealousy scene but she doesn’t look jealous at all just a bit sad i think she possibly is worried about Rachel and while she understands (which is why she’s helping) she wants her to feel beautiful in her own skin sorry if I read a bit too far in lol

-2x20-29:42, 33:12, 35:30 I love how finn last episode said Quinn was so closed off with her feelings and then this scene like maybe she can be herself around Rachel idk

-3x01-10:57 Skank Quinn fully checks Rachel out as she’s leaving in this scene also right after a scene where she said she’s not interested in the boys

-3x05-22:55 talking about finchel tho

-3x08-0:00, 21:54, 37:48

-3x11-14:28,20:00 is also a gay ass look but shes talking to Rachel so I put it here

-3x12-13:09 she only taps Rachel tho

-3x13-15:43 Quinn is acting like the stereotypical ‘gentleman’ and its very Faberry canon esque, to put it the best can

-3x14-34:28 this scene I just can’t the way Quinn lights up when she see her and her voice softens a bit and what she said this is the gayest scene no-one can explain it it a hetero way just ahh

-3x15-10:28 they’re holding hands :DD

-3x19-31:48

-3x22-23:12 those tickets cost so much money I swear they should have been way better friends after high school pft, 40:15 Quinn looks so proud of her girlfriend

Possible scenes, could be just drama-

-1x09-29:27 could be at Rachel

-2x10-12:40 kind of about being sad about Finn but could be jealousy?

-2x16- 34:47 could be about Faberry but is framed as finchel or fuinn

-2x17- 37:28 probably just finchel drama but still Faberry jealousy

-2x18-17:16 they say how they’re ‘fighting about Rachel again’ and Im putting it in idc about finchel :DD

-2x19- 23:19 more about Fuinn like always in this category but Faberry jealousy

-2x22-2:27, 3:29, 8:25 finchel/fuinn/faberry jealousy

Sitting really close when they’re meant to not like each other-

-1x15-34:18

-1x19-32:33

-1x20-19:16 in the scene Quinn kinda checks her out but then they stand really close so I put it here

-2x02 23:24 sits really close to Rachel when she dresses in her Britney Spears costume and in the scene Quinn looks like she’s purposefully trying not to look at her and at 29:20 Quinn chose to sit right behind Rachel again, 39:52 seen sitting right behind her again

-2x10- 35:03 standing really close when it would make a difference if Quinn stood anywhere else (e.g. next to her friends or boyfriend) I just think its weird lol

-2x15- 6:28 (before Quinn starts plotting against Rachel, they’re in celibacy club together but all they do is argue so its still a bit weird)

-3x07- 4:54

I dont know where to put this-

-2x17- 35:10 they kinda just look a bit nervous and small interaction I just wanted to add this because I thought it was cute the way they moved around each other idk

-2x20- 14:46 Rachel knows Quinns eyes so well she knows the flower and colour of the ribbon (also gardenias are for secret love which it would surprise me if Rachel already knew)

-3x04-20:26 Rachel isn’t sitting near her boyfriend or anyone she’s even really friends with its a bit weird that shed be sitting in the corner right next to Quinn away from the other chairs

Songs- Ive probably missed a bunch of these but I tried lmao-

-somebody to love

-halo

-ride with me

-no air

-keep holding on

-bust a move

-proud Mary

-crazy in love

-imagine- there is a gay ass look

-you can’t always get what you want

-dont rain on my parade

-my life would suck without you

-gives u hell

-hello goodbye

-like a prayer

-home(kind of)

-give up the funk

-any way you want it

-faithfully

-dont stop delieving

-Empire State of mind

-ice ice baby

-toxic

-damn it Janet

-time warp

-sweet transvestite

-start me up/living on a prayer

-hot patootie

-forget you

-umbrella/singin in the rain

-I think I wanna marry you

-just the way you are

-ive had the time of my life

-Valerie

-the Dog days are over

-the most wonderful day of the year

-welcome Christmas

-heads will roll/thriller

-fat bottomed girls

-sing

-blame it on the alcohol

-tik tok

-do you wanna touch

-afternoon delight

-get it right

-loser like me

-pretty/unpretty

-born this way

-pure imagination

-New York New York

-Fix you

-last Friday night

-hit me with your best shot/one way or another

-I cant go for that/ you make my dreams

-I kissed a girl

-feed the world

-summer nights

-we found love

-gotta be starting something

-Im sexy and I know it

-stereo hearts (not technicaly but a lot of Faberry so I’m putting it in)

-fly/I believe I can fly

-heres to us

-its not right but its okay

-its all coming back to me now

-paradise by the dashboard light

-we are the champions

-tongue tied

-you get what you give

#faberry #rachel x quinn #quinn x rachel #rachel berry #quinn fabray #glee

42 notes · View notes

horansqueen · 5 years

Text

AM Conversations : chapter 45

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30 || CHAPTER 31 || CHAPTER 32 || CHAPTER 33 || CHAPTER 34 || CHAPTER 35 || CHAPTER 36 || CHAPTER 37 || CHAPTER 38 || CHAPTER 39 || CHAPTER 40 || CHAPTER 41 || CHAPTER 42 || CHAPTER 43 || CHAPTER 44

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4k // 4.4k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- if you want to be notified when this is updated, please message me or leave a comment!

- note for this chapter: just extra super fluff for this chapter. soo enjoy? i hope you like it haha! also, i know the song she sings comes out a year later buuuut yea, whatever lol! a few more cute fluff chapters before drama happens sooo yea. i hope you guys like it. i know not many ppl read this anymore and its okay. just know i love you guys for being loyal and reading this story after 45 chapters. your comments and reblogs and likes and asks make me so so so happy i cant explain! keep sending ideas youd like to read too :)

only one request for this chapter but its fluff so :P

Chapter 45 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I felt myself waking up slowly but kept my eyes closed. My lips curled slightly when I heard my boyfriend’s voice from the shower and I forced myself to open my eyes. I sat up in bed and stretched but when I pushed the covers off of me, I felt a shiver run up my spine despite the fact that it was the end of june and that it was most likely very warm outside. I put my feet off the bed and moved my toes on the carpet before breathing in and getting up. The door was ajar and the closer I got, the better I could hear Niall sing. I pushed on the door slightly and leaned against the door frame, listening to his voice as the steam hit my skin and warmed me.

I had never felt so happy in my entire life with someone and even after all these months, I could barely believe we were dating. I crossed my arms on my chest and leaned my head on the frame too, staring at my boyfriend singing and dancing in the shower. After a while he turned to me and saw me staring at him. He smiled back and made a quick head movement but I shook my head slightly. He rolled his eyes with a smile and opened the glass door. His hair was full of foam and he looked cuter than ever, making me nibble on my bottom lip despite myself.

“Please?” he asked, raising his eyebrows and making me roll my eyes.

I took a few steps closer, letting my arms fall on each side of my body, and his lips curled more at my sight. When he was finally able to reach me, he grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me his way, making me chuckle.

“No no, I took a shower last night remember?”

He smirked and raised his eyebrows at me, not letting go. “And then I fucked your brains out, remember?” he replied in a smartass tone. “Come on, you smell like good sex and sweat.”

I laughed at his words and let him pull me with him. He closed the door behind me and I held my breath as the warm water fell on me and soaked my shirt and panties. Niall smiled more and quickly moved his head back right under the stream to rinse his hair. I stared at his naked body as he closed his eyes, running his hand through his hair to make sure all the soap was gone.

Without thinking, I ran my hands on his wet chest and quickly, he moved his head up again and opened his eyes, bending down to reach my smile with his. The kiss was gentle and soft and I felt water drops fall from his hair to my cheek. A wave of well-being washed over me and I pressed my hands more on his chest.

“What were you singing?” I asked, tilting my chin up.

“Something I wrote. I’ll sing it to you when it’s done.”

I smiled and licked my lips, staring at him some more. I felt like Niall hadn’t written anything in months and I knew he was missing it. I loved watching and listening to him when he was playing guitar, or when he was sitting in front of the piano, but it hadn’t happened much until very recently. He was not the type to share and I respected that, but I was curious and interested in everything that made him happy.

“Happy Birthday petal.” he whispered against my mouth. “How does it feel to date a younger man like me?”

I laughed against his mouth and felt his lips curl against mine.

“Feels amazing.” I admitted, still amused. “Better than yesterday, for sure.”

“But not as good as tomorrow, yea, I know.”

I laughed more and felt his hands slip under my drenched shirt, reaching under my breasts slowly. I bit my bottom lip as he stared at me before kissing me again but deeper this time. I could feel my whole body throb until his thumbs brushed under my breasts. I quickly held my breath again, my heartbeats accelerating, but he just slid his hands back down to my waist.

“Mm, come on darling, take a shower, i’ll go prepare something while you do.”

“Nooo!” I complained when he took a step back. “You can’t turn me on and then leave me here alone.”

He laughed and shook his head, pushing the glass door of the shower again and getting out.

“Such a horny girl.” he just let out, clearly amused by my behavior.

I sent him puppy eyes but he just shook his head and closed the door, trapping me in the shower before blowing me a kiss and leaving.

I grimaced but decided to wash my hair and body quickly after getting undressed and when I finally got out of the shower, I grabbed a fluffy towel only to realize it was warm and I quickly wrapped it around me.

“Thanks for putting it in the dryer.” I let out with a smile when I walked back into our bedroom. “You’re perfect.”

He had put sweatpants and a t-shirt back on and I stared at his back as I tried to find a similar outfit in one of his drawers. With a sigh, I took my towel off and dressed up before rubbing the towel in my hair to dry it more. After a few minutes, he turned around and sent me a fond smile and I smiled back until he handed me something.

“This is one of your gifts.” He explained, holding out a box about as large as a book, wrapped in silver and pink paper. “The personal one.”

I felt my heart skip a few beats inside my chest and smiled as big as possible, pressing my lips together. These were the gifts coming from Niall that I preferred. Of course, I enjoyed the trips, the spa days, the jewels and the activities he gave but the gifts with a meaning meant a million times more and Niall always knew exactly what would make me happy. He gave me things I didn’t even know I needed before.

I licked my lips and grabbed it, unwrapping it very slowly as he stared at my fingers. I let the paper fall on the floor when I noticed an old picture of us in a frame. It was the one I told him to bring on his trip and my lips curled more but i noticed something at the bottom and frowned, moving the frame up to have a better look. My lips parted when I noticed what it was and I looked up in his eyes. It was a card that was part of a game Lottie had brought at the lodge. I remembered picking up that card from the “Kiss & Tell” game before rushing to the bathroom and locking myself in it. I hadn’t told anyone what was on the card except Niall. We had been laying in the dark and I had showing him right before telling him it was him I wanted to kiss, but I didn’t have the guts to. I looked down again at the card and read the words. “Kiss the person you love the most in the room.”

“I kept it and I didn’t know why. It was in my wallet all this time. I remember wondering how I would have felt if you had kissed me instead of Harry after picking up that card, you know?” he shrugged and looked down at it. “That night you said you loved me more than anyone else in the world and I said I did too. I didn’t understand back then why it was so important for me but now I do.”

He took a step closer and brought his hands to my waist, waiting until I looked up in his eyes again.

“When we fought a few months ago after my trip, I left you here to get drunk. We both went to bed mad, or at least not on good terms, and I realized how wrong it was. I want to keep this frame in our room, right next to the bed, so every time we fight or argue, we always work things out here before falling asleep. I will always kiss the person I love the most right before I fall asleep. Every single night. I promise.”

I felt myself tear up and swallowed the lump in my throat. I couldn’t talk, I knew that my voice would crack, and without thinking, I crushed my mouth against his, It hurt slightly but he didn’t say anything. He just pulled me closer and deepened the kiss. He tasted so fucking good and I felt tears fall down my face as we kept on kissing for I don’t know how long. When he pulled away, I kept my eyes closed and brushed my lips against his.

“When you said you were romantic I thought you were the type, you know, to give flowers and stuff.”

He laughed and moved his upper body back to look in my eyes.

“There’s a bouquet waiting for you int he kitchen.”

This time, i’m the one who laughed. I turned around and put the frame next to the bed on the small table and sighed as I looked at our younger faces on the picture. I wanted this house to be full of pictures of us, whether they were recent or old.

“Come, let’s go bake that cake of yours.”

I turned back to him with a frown and tilted my head.

“I gotta bake my own birthday cake?”

He laughed and grabbed my hand, pulling me with him until the kitchen and I noticed all the ingredients already out along with a big bouquets of white and purple lilacs placed in the middle of the table.

“The florist said it looked ridiculous and tried to convince me to add other flowers but I knew that’s what you wanted.” he pointed out. “Just in case though, there’s also a bouquet of roses in the living room.”

I smiled more and chuckled, loving the fact that he knew me so well, and took a step closer to him to kiss his lips.

“Aaaand maybe a few tulips next to the piano.” he grimaced before I brushed my lips on his jaw.

“How are you so perfect?”

He searched for my mouth with his and kissed me deeply again. I was not even surprised that his kisses still made butterflies hit the inside of my stomach, even after so many months. I knew it would always be like that.

“Okay, come on now, let’s bake that cake yea?” he said a little louder, getting out of my embrace and turning around to go grab the flour. “We got up late and we have a busy evening and an even busier night!”

“Niall, I said I didn’t want anything big.” I complained with a grimace, letting my head fall back on my shoulders.

“I promise on my life you’re gonna have fun! It’s just a few hours with our friends, and then i’m bringing you somewhere else just the two of us.��

I wanted to be annoyed but the truth was, I was touched and very very curious. I walked up to him as he was cracking an egg, letting it fall in a bowl and I sighed low of happiness.

“Thank you, Niall.”

He turned his head quickly to peck my lips with a light sound and I chuckled.

“Come on, read the recipe out loud will you?”

Quickly, we made the cake mix and ended up having a bit more difficulty working on the icing. I ended up a bit annoyed and searched through his fridge, taking the cream cheese out and putting it on the counter.

“We’ll just prepare the easiest icing ever and pretend we’re amazing bakers, how’s that?”

He laughed and we started working on it in silence right after putting the mix in the oven.

“Just a bit of milk.” I specified. “Do you have vanilla?”

I watched him combine everything in a bowl as I nibbled my bottom lip and added icing sugar slowly to the mix.

“You know, we’re actually a good team.” I pointed out.

I watched him dip his finger in the icing and sticking his tongue out to get a taste.

“Heyy, what about me?” I frowned jokingly before he dipped an other finger in it and wiped the icing on my cheek, making me groan.

“Come here.”

He pulled me closer and licked my cheek, making a shiver run up my spine at the contact of his tongue with my skin.

“You’re right, it tastes amazing, we’re a good team.” he admitted low. “Not just for baking.”

He took the icing again, taking more of it with his finger and putting it on my neck. I held my breath as his tongue ran on my skin and quivered again in his arms.

“I just took a shower, remember?”

“Oh shut up.” he let out, making me laugh, as he grabbed my waist and pulled me closer.

“Can I get a taste, too?”

Without answering, he brought his lips against mine and kissed me deeply but very slowly. I closed my eyes, running my hand in his hair and letting a moan escape my lips. He swallowed it and I felt his fingers slip slightly under my shirt, on the skin of my back. I laughed against his mouth when he broke the kiss and shook my head.

“I meant you know, really taste.”

“Mmhm.” he shrugged, pulling away and taking the icing bowl. “I know that’s what you meant, but you can’t taste your cake before tonight.”

“But-”

“Don’t argue!” he cut me with a smirk. “Go in the living room, i’ll join you, okay?”

I groaned and let my feet rub on the wood floor in an annoying noise as a sign of protestation. It’s only when I reached the living room that my lips curled back again. There was a literal fort made with blankets and cushions and I let out a chuckle of amazement.

“Niall?” I asked loud enough for him to hear.

“Sit down! I’m coming!”

I chuckled and got on my knees, pushing the blanket that acted as a door only to sit on the tiny mattress. I couldn’t believe he had taken the time to make a fort in his own living room and I started wondering how long it took him to plan that. He had placed his tablet on the side and when he joined me, I frowned slightly.

“Why did you bring this?” I asked, pointing it right before a smile reappeared on my face.

He handed me a bowl of ice cream and I started jumping slightly on my ass while still sitting.

“Don’t move too much, it’s not that solid.” he laughed a bit. “I thought we could watch a movie together?”

I sent him a fond smile and tilted my head again before nodding very slowly.

“Great! So I bought your favorite ice cream but added candies, chocolate syrup and caramel, the way you like it.”

“Thank you, Nee.” I let out as he sat in front of me. I moved my upper body closer to kiss him. “Thank you so fucking much.” I kissed him again. “Thank you.” Again. “Thank you.” And again.

“You also get to pick the movie.” he let out with a smile, kissing me back. “We’ll watch anything you want. It’s your day.”

I sat back and looked at him with a smirk, raising my eyebrows as his face changed.

“Now you’re scaring me.” he admitted as I laughed, grabbing his tablet. “Wait what are you doing? Isn’t the movie you want to watch on netflix?”

I held his tablet against me and raised my eyebrows at him again.

“Do you promise we’ll watch whatever I want?”

It took him a few seconds but he finally nodded.

“I promise.”

—

The bar was loud and crowed but we quickly found our friends waiting for us, sitting a bit further with beer and sangria pitchers. I smiled more, a bit excited, and everyone greeted us, telling me ‘happy birthday’ for the first time in person on that day. Louis was the last one and he got up to wrap his arms around me before I hugged him back.

“Happy birthday princess.” he whispered after kissing one of my cheeks and pulling me closer. “I hope your day is perfect, that’s what you deserve.”

I laughed when we pulled away and bit on my bottom lip.

“It is, I have the perfect boyfriend and he made this day perfect.”

We sat down and I felt Niall’s hand slide on my thigh. I quickly put my hand over his and intertwined our fingers, squeezing them hard.

“What did she make you watch?” Louis asked with a smirk. “Back To The Future again?”

Niall’s smile fell and he rolled his eyes, making Louis laugh.

“Which one?”

“Louis, don’t even ask.” Niall argued, shaking his head and making me smile more.

“We didn’t watch Back To The Future.” I pointed out, leaning on the table to get closer to Louis. “I made him watch This Is Us.”

Louis’ eyes moved from me to Niall then back at me and finally on Niall before he burst into laughter, making Niall growl next to me. I squeezed his fingers tighter but I couldn’t help the smile that spread on my face.

“How was it, Neil? To watch a movie with you in it with your girlfriend by your side?” Louis teased.

Niall raised his eyebrows and nose up as he leaned one of his elbow on the table, staring in his friend’s eyes.

“The worst was actually looking at you for an hour and a half, Tommo.”

Louis laughed again and shrugged.

“Guess you’re cursed, mate, because here I am again!”

I laughed and rolled my eyes at their banter until Louis grabbed a glass and poured me sangria. Niall did the same for himself with beer and he finally sighed, the left corner of his lips raising up.

“You know, I can’t really blame her though.” Niall joked. “The girl enjoys looking at me, I just give her what she needs.”

“Oh shut up.” I let out, making him laugh more. “Now what’s so special about tonight? Why are we here anyway?”

I glanced around before meeting Louis’ eyes and he smirked, raising his eyebrows. I didn’t like it and frowned, suddenly a bit scared of what was to come. Julie chuckled and it caught my attention, making me look at her.

“It’s karaoke night.” she explained with a sigh but also a smile on her lips. “And apparently, we’re all going to sing.”

I felt suddenly extremely nervous and without realizing it, I squeezed my boyfriend’s fingers hard between mine.

“Ouch, darling, watch the fingers, they’re important.” he chuckled. “For music and for… you know.. pleasure.”

“Niall.” I whispered, looking down at our hands together. “You know I hate being on a scene. I don’t like attention.”

“You did it a few years ago and you had fun.”

I sent him an annoyed look and sighed, raising my nose up in a grimace. He was right, I had sang a song a while ago at a karaoke night and we always had a lot of fun doing those in someone’s living room, but in public it was a bit different. I was already a bit shy around my friends, so to think i would do it in front of a bunch of strangers made it even worse.

“Here.” Louis let out, pushing the sangria pitcher closer. “Drink up. I’ll go first.”

I swallowed the whole glass in front of me and filled it out again as I watched Louis get on stage and grab a microphone.

“Here’s one of the best written songs in the whole world.” he only explained as the music started.

I held my breath and smiled when I recognized the oasis song and mouthed it with him.

“So Sally can wait, she knows it’s too late as she’s walking on by My soul slides away, but don’t look back in anger I heard you say.”

When he was done and the music stopped, we all got up and started clapping. Liam even whistled loud and I let out a ‘woohoo!“ when he got off stage. He hugged me and bent down to whisper in my ear.

“Do it now, it’s worth it.”

I quickly nodded and he moved away. He extended his hand and I slapped in it before bumping my fist against his.

“Come on, you can do it.” he added as I sent him a smile.

I turned to Niall and I smiled without thinking. I watched him push his glasses on his nose and a bunch of memories of us came back to my mind. I felt so lucky to have him in my life and I chuckled.

“Just for you.”

I didn’t wait for his answer and ran up the stairs as a guy walked up to me to ask me which song I wanted to sing. I told him and he chuckled before nodding and finally left after handing me the microphone.

“I dedicate this to my best friend in the whole wide world.”

The first notes started and I kept my gaze on Niall and when I started singing, I saw him start laughing hard, his mouth wide open. He let his head fall back and clapped in his hands a few times to encourage me.

“Right from the start, couldn’t pull us apart, it just works Nobody else ever gets me as well on this earth Like rock and roll, Marshall’s and telly’s Mac and cheese, PB’s and jellies Some things are better together, and that’s you and me-e

Dude, I love you, bro, I love you Man, I love you You’re my brother from another, 'nother mother You are my favorite, I’m not ashamed to admit Cause I do, dude, I do Dude, I love you, bro, I love you Man, I love you You’re my homie, no one knows me like you know me Like the sun and the moon, all the best things comes in two What would I do without a friend like you?

W-w-w-w-what would I do? Without a friend like you W-w-w-w-what would I do? Without a friend like you?”

I smiled as I sang when I noticed all my friends were standing up and dancing together and when the song stopped, I bowed down quickly and ran back to my friends without really giving them any attention. Niall bent down slightly, his arms open, and I ran to him.. He picked me up for a few seconds and put me back down before kissing me hard, laughing against my lips.

“Good song. Thank you.” he whispered, pulling away. “Now listen to mine, yea?”

I nodded and he grabbed my hand before walking to the stage. When he was far enough, my hand slipped out of his and I just stared at him as he grabbed the microphone. He cleared his throat and licked his lips, making my heart melt in my chest. I sat down but remained on the edge of my chair as he talked.

“For the love of my life.”

It took me literally one note to recognize the song and I held my breath as I felt myself tense. I tried to remember all the words of the song and something twisted in my stomach.

“You’re a falling star, you’re the get away car You’re the line in the sand when I go too far You’re the swimming pool on an August day And you’re the perfect thing to see

And you play it coy, but it’s kinda cute Oh, when you smile at me you know exactly what you do Baby, don’t pretend that you don’t know it’s true 'Cause you can see it when I look at you

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times It’s you, it’s you; you make me sing You’re every line, you’re every word, you’re everything”

I don’t know why but slowly, I got up and walked closer to the scene as we stared at each other. Was it possible for this love story to last forever? Could this love we felt for each other never fade away or die?

“You’re a carousel, you’re a wishing well And you light me up when you ring my bell You’re a mystery, you’re from outer space You’re my every minute of my everyday

And I can’t believe, uh, that I’m your man And I get to kiss you, baby, just because I can Whatever comes our way, oh, we’ll see it through And you know that’s what our love can do

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times It’s you, it’s you; you make me sing You’re every line, you’re every word, you’re everything

So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times It’s you, it’s you; you make me sing You’re every line, you’re every word, you’re everything You’re every song, and I sing along Cause you’re my everything Yeah, yeah

So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la So, la, la, la, la, la, la-la-la, la-la-la”

I didn’t scream when he was done but I heard all our friends do it. He jumped off the stage and cupped my face the way he had done it after playing the song he had written for me and when his wet lips met mine, my eyes fluttered close.

“It’s been six moths but I love you as much as I did back then, maybe even more.” he whispered, kissing me deeply again. “Definitely more.”

“Thank you, Niall.” I breathed out, swallowing hard as I felt myself tear up for the second time that day. “This day is perfect.”

“This day is not over.” he added, smiling more, the palms of his hands warming my already burning cheeks. “Happy birthday Olivia, I love you.”

#niall horan #niall horan smut #niall horan fluff #niall horan story #niall horan writing #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fan fic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan fan fiction #my fanfics #amc #im always super unsure of my chapters but oh well f it #thats it i hope you like it

75 notes · View notes

woos-sweaterpaws · 4 years

Note

i want to get to know you so do 1-50 (except 29) 🌻

This is really really sweet of you anon thank u!!

__________________________________________

1. how many pillows do you sleep with?

I have 6 in my bed rn

and over 20 plushies

its never enough

2. do you believe in soulmates?

yes i do

3. would you ever kiss a stranger?

yes but not if its like total-never-spoke-to-them stranger

4. describe your dream house

i would prefer not a house but a nice penthouse-loft-apartment in a big city with a nice view and big windows

interior would be minimalistic style with light wood and a big double sized bed for me (since i dont think i will have a partner lol)

i would love an apartment with multiple floors or like a half-floor for the bedroom

5. do you usually use cash or card?

card

6. do you enjoy driving in general?

i hate it with a burning passion

7. do you like your name? if not, what would you change your name to?

i dont HATE my name

there are better/prettier ones but i think mine fits me

i would still like a more international name (since mine is kinda weird in the english speaking world) but i dont have smth specific in mind

8. what’s your favorite cuisine?

italian ~

9. how often do you get massages?

i dont o.o i got some a few years ago because my back is fucked but otherwise never

10. do you play video games? if so, what games?

generally chill games like animal crossing, stardew valley and such, the big nintendo titles like mario kart and zelda, binding of isaac

11. do you prefer to color with colored pencils, crayons, or markers?

colored pencils!

12. what other fandoms are you in?

oh boy

okay so apart from all of kpop and thai dramas im in

skam

aftg

trc

the mentioned video games if you wanna count that as fandoms

im probably forgetting a ton rn

13. do you have a signature in your style/everyday outfits?

if its comfy i like it

usually involves hoodies or boys shirts

i prefer if i dont have to worry about showing skin somewhere i dont want to

14. do you have any pets? if not, do you want some in the future?

no i dont have any atm but i had bunnies, birds and a guniea pig before. and yes i want cats when i move out

15. do you give objects you own a name? (car, house, plants, etc)

i named my cactus but it died (plants hate me) i also name all my plushies and random animals on the street

16. do you like the weather where you live?

its okay yea. summers are not too hot but i wish the winters were cold enough for snow :(

17. if you could wear one color for the rest of your life, what would it be?

black! its generally my comfort color in clothes

18. do you like making small talk?

WHO tf likes smalltalk? no!

19. what’s your favorite social media platform?

tumblr 100%

20. have you ever been to hawaii?

no :(

21. name a fashion trend that you absolutely hate

no offence but crop tops

i dont hate them they look good on you guys

but i hate that i cant find hoodies and shirts in womans sections anymore that arent cropped (ive been searching the past 6 months and everytime i like smth its cropped - i especially hated that when looking for oversized hoodies)

i dont wear them myself because cold so it sucks not finding cute clothes

i also fundamentally disagree with mustard-yellow

22. name a fashion trend that you absolutely love

oversized hoodies with ripped jeans and boots was my winter favourite

23. what was the last text you sent?

“okay” in out family groupchat lol

24. when making plans, do you like to organize or go with the flow when the time comes?

i like it to be organized but not be the one who actually organizes it if that makes sense?

25. what do you want to name your future kids?

i dont want kids but i wanna name my cats mochi and (c)leo (depending on gender)

26. do you have a type?

with looks i generally prefer darker hair with pretty eyes but if im comfortable with u it doesnt matter

if u like cuddling, are patient and gentle and love to make jokes that arent funny i probably like u lots

27. when was the last time you kissed someone?

like...kissed kissed? in grade 7 so...2012? my first and last kiss lol

28. how often do you cook?

as often as necessary, as little as possible (i cant really cook except for pasta and stuff so im mostly living of instant meals and “cut up a lot of things and put it in a pan until its browned” kinda stuff)

30. do you always remember your dreams?

no i dont

i had a dream diary once but that was a disaster

31. do you believe in ghosts?

yea kinda

i believe in invisible spirits/souls living with us yea

32. would you ever want to move outside of your country?

sometimes? im too scared to actually do it but there are many nice cities i would love to live in

33. describe your first love

well idk about love...it was always more of an obsession kinda thing and it was never a two-way-thing so i never had a real first love...

34. more peanut butter or more jelly?

i hate peanuts so no pb and only jelly (or nutella if you love me)

35. do your irls know about your tumblr account?

they know i have a tumblr but only my best friend actually follows me (and a high school friend i lost contact to)

my other friends dont have tumblr so they dont care

36. do you prefer hot or cold beverages?

cold!

37. when was the last time you finished a book?

i reread the aftg series last december for the 4th time

38. what would you want your wedding colors to be?

green-white? like a soft bright pastel green? maybe add pastel pink too

39. how long do you let your nails grow?

if i can see them clearly from the inside of my hand i cut them

40. if you could stay at a certain age, what age would you pick?

probably 19 or 7 theres no in between

41. who do you think has it easiest: older siblings or younger siblings?

older siblings because they learn responsibility earlier

i dont have siblings tho so idk

42. how often do you post on social media?

on tumblr daily, on insta never, on twitter occasionally if fun stuff happens

43. do you enjoy big groups?

nope

44. do you like it when you’re awaken by the sounds of birds chirping?

its better than my alarm but waaay too early so nope

45. which hand is your favorite?

left?

46. how many people do you follow?

1152 (yes i might have a problem)

47. how many followers do you have?

359 on my main and 27 on my fandom side account

48. how many drafts do you have?

53 but i use it to save posts i find interesting or that contain links i might need later

49. do you hang or fold your sweaters?

hang because im lazy and it saves space on the clothes dryer rack

50. even numbers or odd?

odd!

6 notes · View notes

thewritingstar · 4 years

Note

1-200 we're all in quarantine so got nothing to do. Might as well ask pls

oo anon you were gonna ask anyways lol. But I did this hella quick during a zoom.....

1. What is your middle name?

-Rose

2. Do you have any nicknames that aren’t derived from your actual name?

-Star

2. Do you have any allergies?

-Penicillin (not really thou), but no

4. What is the longest your hair has ever been?

-Lower back

5. How well can you write in cursive?

-Its readable

6. Name one item on your bucket list.

-Going to all the Disney parks in the world

7. Have you ever been on a blind date?

-haven’t even been on a real date

8. What is the oldest piece of clothing you still wear and how old is it?

-prob like five years ago and its jeans

9. How often do you eat out at a fancy restaurant?

-nothing like I have to dress up but maybe once a year??

10. How grammatically correct are you when you text?

-rules don’t apply in text

11. Can you drive stick?

-hell no

12. What foreign country would you most like to visit and why?

-japan because I think it would be so cool

13. Nutella or peanut butter?

-NUTELLA

14. At what age did you have your first kiss?

-...............ahahhahahh

15. DC or Marvel?

-DC. Harley Quinn owns my ass

16. Have you ever hosted a wild party?

-my parties consist of drinking capri suns and playing cards against humanity and Mario kart

17. Name/author of the last book you read cover to cover. Do you recommend it?

-...ooof haven’t read a book in a while

18. How many of your Facebook friends do you actually hang with?

-my mom

19. Have you ever donated blood?

-I was apart of a cancer study so I used to donate my blood (and pee) to science

20. From 1-10, how much do you like decorating for holidays?

-8 I love to decorate but I’m not allow near the Christmas trees

21. Coffee or tea?

-vaniila iced lattes or raspberry ice tea own me

22. What is your go-to Starbucks drink?

-Vanilla bean frap with extra vanilla

23. Last show you binge watched?

-currently its assassination classroom

24. Dogs or cats?

-puppy’s

25. Favorite animated Disney character?

-Jessica Rabbit, Dumbo, Rey, Tamatoa and Guedo

26. Have you ever cooked a big family meal by yourself?

-mostly baking for my family

27. Favorite winter activity?

-Staying inside

28. Have you ever butt dialed anyone?

-probably

29. Can you blow a bubble gum bubble?

-yes

30. How early in the year do you start celebrating Christmas?

-my mom plays Xmas music year round

31. What emoji best describes your life right now?

-the wilting rose

32. Are you fluent in more than one language?

-nope

33. What is the longest you’ve ever kept a New Year’s resolution?

-I don’t make them

34. Have you ever successfully been on a diet? Did you gain any of the weight back?

-I’m on a diet to gain weight and its not going well

35. Are any of your grandparents still alive?

-only on my moms side

36. How good are you at communicating through facial expressions?

-hahaha my face gives everything away and I can read people pretty well

37. Have you ever gotten a commercial jingle stuck in your head?

-EDUCATION CONNECTION! Get connected for free

38. Have you ever left a movie theater before the movie was over?

-Nope

39. Do you consider rapping singing?

-rapping is in its own ballpark...its why its called rapping

40. Does your home have a fireplace?

Yep

41. Favorite non-chocolate candy?

-sour gummies worms

42. If you could have only one superpower, what would you want and why?

-oooof ummmmmm maybe teleportation

43. Have you ever locked your keys in your car?

44. Do you listen to any religious music?

-noooooooooo

45. Do you drink soda? If so, which one is your favorite?

-I hate soda

46. What was your ACT score?

-do not do me like this (21)

47. Rice or quinoa?

-rice

48. From 1-10, how good of a driver do you consider yourself?

-like an 8

49. Do you like horror movies?

-nope

50. How easily do you cry?

-uh depends on what it is

51. Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?

-no but I want some

52. You are hanging with your closest friends. What are you most likely doing?

-being dumb and quoting tik toks at target

53. Can you handle spicy foods? What is your spice limit?

-not very well

54. Can you play any musical instruments? If so, which ones?

-no

55. Are you more introverted or extroverted?

-middle of the road

56. Last CD you bought?

-Folklore by Taylor Swift

57. Do you like roller coasters?

-yessss but they cant be extremely tall

58. What day of the week is laundry day for you?

-uhhh depends on when I have time

59. Have you ever played spin the bottle?

-uh maybe once but I was in fourth grade and walked away

60. How long have you known your best friend?

-I’ve known my bestie for 16 years (met when we were 4)

61. Can you eat using chopsticks?

-yes!! I usually eat my Chinese food with them

62. Do you have any stickers on your laptop computer? If so, what are they of?

-no because I need to get a case for my iMac and iPad

63. How often do you say y'all?

-every fucking day. Y’all is my go too

64. Favorite flavor of ice cream?

-cookie dough, pralines and cream, blue raspberry sherbert, vanilla, coffee

65. How long was your longest relationship? Are you still with that person?

-my longest relationship was like three weeks in fourth grade with my friends cousin who I saw twice

66. Star Trek or Star Wars?

-haven’t seen either but prob Star Wars cause r2d2 is cute

67. How good are you at math?

-ehhh I’m okay at stats

68. Have you ever acted in a play or a musical?

-used to do the plays in middle school :)

69. How often do you read/pay attention to your horoscope?

-not much my horoscope but just my sign in general

70. What is the shortest your hair has ever been?

-just above my shoulders

71. Have you ever broken any bones?

-my big toe

72. Do you like to go fishing?

-nooooooo I went fishing once and it pooped on me

73. Do you believe in evolution?

-of course

74. Favorite costume you wore for Hallowen? How old were you?

-I was perry the platypus…. 19

75. Real or fake Christmas trees?

-fake!!! WHO WANTS TO CLEAN THAT UP???

76. How many pillows do you sleep with?

-usually 1-2 but like 5 in the winter

77. Do you live in an apartment or a house?

-House rn

78. How many of your friends are of the opposite gender?

-in my close circle, one but I do have many boy homies

79. Have you ever had a near-death experience?

-many times

80. How long have you been at your current job?

-four weeks

81. What kind of car do you drive (year, brand, model, color)?

-white car

82. How flexible are you?

-not super but mama can bend

83. Have you ever ended a romantic relationship?

-haven’t even started one

84. Phrase you say the most?

-“I’m uncomfortable” “Y’all” “I would let J.D from heathers…..”

85. Have you ever kissed anyone of the same gender? If so, did you like it?

-no but I wish

86. Do you own any homemade clothing?

-not that I know of

87. Do you like fast food?

-yessss

88. Have you ever given anyone CPR?

-nope

89. Have you ever learned to do anything from a how-to video on YouTube?

-I fixed my moms glasses yesterday with a video so she wouldn’t have to spend a shit ton of money

90. Describe your sense of humor.

-if Always Sunny in Philadelphia and “vine comp that butters my eggroll” had a baby

92. Favorite cereal?

-no

93. Have you ever auditioned for a reality competition show?

-no

94. Have you ever gotten a TV theme song stuck in your head?

-Sugar, spice and everything nice, these were the ingredients…….

95. Do you believe in ghosts?

-indifferent

96. Do you think there is life on other planets?

-hell yeah

97. Have you ever given money to a street performer?

-yep

98. Your deepest fear?

-lets not go there

99. Pancakes or waffles?

-waffles but I don’t even like them that much

100. Are you still friends with anyone from high school?

-yep, my friend circle dates back to elementary

101. From 1-10, how good of a dancer do you consider yourself?

-7

102. How much of a patient person are you?

-I can be extremely patient. Once waited three hours in a dressing room with my friend and I didn’t have a phone

103. Do you know your IQ?

-no but its prob god level

104. Do you eat meat at all?

-mama loves meat

105. Do you own any clothes from a garage sale or a thrift store?

-I think so

106. Have you ever bought anything from a flea market?

-yess my mom used to take me to flea markets all the time

107. Have you ever quit a job?

-early this year

108. Have you ever gotten a song you dislike stuck in your head?

-many times

109. Any movie(s) you can watch over and over and over again and enjoy just as much each time?

-robots to ratatouille

110. Do you or have you ever worn glasses?

-just sun glasses

111. Have you ever skinny dipped?

-when I was like 6

112. Are your birth parents still together?

-yep

113. Have you ever been in the audience for the taping of a TV show?

-not that I know of

114. Favorite type of cookie?

-chocolate chip or the sugar cookies with the pink frosting on them (I’m a whore for them)

115. Have you ever been broken up with?

-nope

116. How often do you smile when getting your picture taken?

-most of the time

117. Have you ever accidentally dialed 911?

-yes I have and I was 6 and bullied for it for years by my uncle even though my cousins tricked me into doing it

118. Oldest memory?

-throwing a chair at a kid in preschool for stealing my cookie

119. Have you ever been the victim of a nasty prank?

-nope

120. How often do you snort when you laugh?

-uhhhh a lot

121. From 1-10, how good of a singer do you consider yourself?

-5

122. Favorite Disney song?

-uuuuuuhhh Shiny, See the Light, Why Don’t you Do Right, Show Yourself

123. Where do you see yourself 10 years from now?

-hopefully in la

124. What is your Myers-Briggs personality type?

-I’m an advocate

125. Have you ever had a fortune cookie fortune come true?

-I think so

126. Name one thing you wish people would stop posting on social media.

-fascist, racist, homophobia stuff

127. Last musical artist you saw live?

-Jonas brothers

128. Credit cards or cash?

-cash cause I feel like I didn’t spend anything

129. Favorite fandom?

-the powderpuff girls or fairy tail

130. What is your astrological sign?

-Aries

131. Have you ever been fired from a job?

-nope I’m a good noodle

132. Any hidden talents?

-I can do the cinnamon challenge

133. Can you surf?

-nope

134. What motivates you to do well in life?

-the fear of failure

135. Your worst physical feature?

-my acne

136. From 1-10, how much are you like your father?

-mehhhhhhhh like a 4

137. How lucky do you consider yourself?

-I’m a pretty lucky person ngl

138. Name a moment in your life when you were pleasently surprised.

-when I won a coffee maker at my senior grad night raffle

139. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty?

-nope

140. What type of shoes do you wear the most?

-my converse

141. Favorite summer activity?

-getting coffee

142. Favorite song to sing in the shower?

-any Taylor swift song

143. Have you ever lived with a roommate you did not get along with?

-my parents sometimes

144. Have you ever lived on a farm?

-my grandparents owned a cherry farm when I was little

145. Have you ever kept a diary or a journal?

-tumblr is my diary

146. TV show or movie you quote/reference the most?

-Always Sunny, The Office, Gotham

147. How often do you get mad at yourself?

-constantly

148. Have you ever gotten any stitches?

-only in animal crossing (he’s so cute)

149. Have you ever been hunting?

-no

150. Favorite YouTube channel?

-Jenna marbles, try guys, mukbang edit channel, drama channels

151. Have you ever had a pet besides a dog or a cat?

-I had a mouse once

152. From 1-10, how well do you work with others?

-9

153. Are you friends with any of your exes?

-I don’t got exes

154. Apple or PC?

-I have an Apple Mac rn but I think I loved my pc so much so I’m getting used to the format

155. Do you collect anything?

-what don’t I collect? Funko, pins, so much stuff

156. Have you ever seen any Broadway plays or musicals?

-I saw Newsies and A Music chorus

157. Any missed opporunites you wish you had taken?

-I’m not too sure

158. Have you ever uttered a spoken hashtag?

-yes

159. Do you have a pool at your house?

-nope

160. What is the longest you’ve gone without sleep?

-like 24 hours and it was hell

161. Last thing that made you laugh?

-a meme 20 sec ago

162. Disney or Nickelodeon?

-Disney

163. Name one celebrity you wish was still alive.

-Billy Mays (Oxyclean dude)

164. From 1-10, how much are you like your mother?

-maybe a 6

165. Your best physical feature?

-my hair

166. Earbud or earmuff headphones?

-earbud

167. Have you ever wished you were born the opposite gender?

-..hmmmm sometimes I think it would be cool but I’m pretty content with being a girl...

168. Do you have any piercings anywhere besides your ear lobes?

-my nose

169. How often do you wash your hair?

-every other day usually

170. Showers or baths?

-I love a good bath but I take showers more

171. Have you ever been a bridesmaid or a groomsman?

-noooo but I wanna be

172. Bottled or tap water?

-bottle

173. What was your favorite TV show when you were a kid?

POWERPUFF GIRLS

174. Any guilty pleasures you’re willing to discuss?

-watching glee

175. Favorite video game?

-Mario kart

176. Have you ever gotten a New Year’s kiss exactly at midnight?

-nooooo why are there so many questions about kissing

177. How many of the United States have you visited?

-four, ive passed over a few more in a plane

178. Have you ever given money to a homeless person?

-yes

179. Have you ever gotten a surgery?

-no

180. Your least favorite food?

-cheese

181. From 1-10, how competitive are you?

-depends. I’m like a 6 but I can be pushed to a 10 when motivated

182. Do you like wearing hats?

-only a snap back occasionally

183. How much of a jealous peron are you?

-ehh not really

184. What was your SAT score?

-900-1100 (stop nationwide testing doesn’t work and I didn’t learn eveything)

185. Have you ever voted for a reality competition show?

-no

186. Does anyone in your family currently serve in your country’s military?

-my cousin

187. Snowboarding or skiing?

-I don’t do snow

188. What celebrity would you most want to play you in a movie about your life?

-jack black

189. Have you ever been a Boy or Girl Scout?

-hell no

190. Have you ever dyed your hair?

-many times

191. From 1-10, how good of a cook do you consider yourself?

-7

192. You have just opened up a web browser. What is the first site you visit?

-this cursed site

193. How many things can you do with your weaker hand?

-a lot

194. Were you involved in any academic clubs in high school?

-honors i guess

195. Have you ever played hooky from school?

-like twice

196. Are you comfortable with watching rated R movies?

—-not with my parents

197. Do you root for any sports teams?

-bold of you to assume i do sport

198. First thing you do when you wake up in the morning?

-pee

199. If you could take home any one animal from the zoo, which one would you choose?

-a lizard

200. Tell something about yourself most people don’t know.

-uhhh ummmm (I have a tik tok with 7.5k followers)

2 notes · View notes

hardforbenhardy · 5 years

Text

~ prompt list ~

if you ever send in a request, feel free to add in a prompt for the list!! just send the number with the request in reference to this list vv

1. I swear its like you’re losing brain cells by the minute

2. Wait… stay.

3. You really want to know what I’m thinking?

4. Could you stay out of this, for once?

5. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out

6. And then there were 2

7. In the bathroom? really?

8. Were you born this way or is it something you just work on every day?

9. You don’t clear your history do you?

10. It’s like I’m living in the stone age

11. How long have you been standing there?

12. Stay on your side

13. It’s all over the walls

14. I swear, she’s clueless

15. A year ago I would’ve been terrified

16. Have you changed that pillowcase once?

17. She sure is smiling tonight

18. Now, I know what this looks like, but we’re gonna laugh about it soon…

19. It was his idea

20. You couldn’t go three days without me

21. It’s only 4 feet

22. Let me go

23. After you

24. You couldn’t be more blind if you were actually blind

25. It’s different with you

26. Mmm, bubblegum flavour

27. Fetch me one, peasant

28. That’s not how it sounded last night

29. Breathe into your body

30. You bought all 10?

31. I’ll always look after you

32. That’s what you’re wearing?

33. If only I had some inspiration…

34. I’ll clear your head

35. I swear you bring out the best/worst in me (50/50 right there)

36. I’m way too sober for this

37. I need somewhere to stay

38. You really don’t remember?

39. For you, anything goes

40. The doctor said it’s normal

41. You bought WHAT?

42. You can’t stay in there forever, unlock the door

43. That is a terrible idea perfect for a time like this

44. And after all these years, why today?

45. Use your words.

46. What happened to your face?

47. I will always love you

48. You are going to be the death of me

49. Please come over

50. You flinch again, and I bite

51. This is illegal?

52. We are not getting married!

53. Stop following me like a lost puppy

54. Can you two stop embarassing me?

55. I can’t believe you would do this to me

56. You don’t always have to be in control

57. They’re going to kill you when they find out you...

58. Your tutor is pretty hot

59. Why have you been so secretive lately?

60. I’m dying

61. Don’t push me away anymore

62. How come you’re the only one who can see me?

63. I just wanted to hear your voice

64. You’re a nightmare

65. I’m not helping you babysit

66. Just so you know, this isn’t a date

67. Did we sleep together?

68. How long are you going to keep blackmailing me?

69. I’m not taking you to hospital just because you stunned your toe

70. If you won’t do it - I will

71. I can’t remember anything

72. You’re telling me how to do it?

73. I tested positive

74. If only I had some motivation…

75. You can’t go- not now.

76. We’ll find a way

77. Bite me

78. Shouldn’t you be with her/him?

79. It wasn’t your fault

80. Did you need something?

81. You cant handle me

82. I could never do that to you

83. Promise me.

84. You’re going to catch me, right?

85. You lay one hand on her and I will end you

86. This has got to be illegal

87. Somewhere deep down in you, I know you agree

88. I’m sorry, I thought you knew…

89. Don’t stoop to his level

90. You can’t be in here

91. I just want to help, let me help

92. Are we there yet?

93. Carry me!

94. You’ve known all this time?

95. Are you wearing my shirt?

96. I cant hear my thoughts over you’re weeping

97. This has to be a prank

98. Wanna bet?

99. Why would you do that for me?

100. Wow you really don’t pick up on hints, do you?

101. Prove it.

102. I wont allow this, I cant accept it.

103. Quit staring.

104. You bought me what?

105. I think it’s backwards

106. Wait, you’re allergic?!

107. Jinx

108. Get comfy, because this is gonna take awhile

109. You’re going to regret this

110. Truth or dare

111. Well would ya look at that? You were right.

112. Go ahead, hit me

113. Ever heard of knocking?

114. Im banned from there

115. Get down from there before you hurt yourself

116. Did I stutter?

117. I heard you say it in your sleep

118. Who’s bra is that?

119. Hold me. Just hold me.

120. This isn’t how I planned on telling you, but…

121. This was a bad idea

122. I cant do anything right.

123. Please don’t cry

124. Why are you awake right now?

125. Why are you lying to me?

126. Forget it, you’re a fucking asshole!

127. Don’t you ever do that again

128. Do you even still love me?

129. Nobody’s seen you in days.

130. I’m worried about you

131. Can you shut up for once in your life

132. Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know

133. If you don’t hug me right now I think I’ll fall apart

134. Just get home as soon as possible okay?

135. I told you not to fall in love with me!

136. Go with me? As long as you hold my hand

137. Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?

138. Have you seen my hoodie? Nooo. You’re wearing it, aren’t you?

139. OH you’re jealous!

140. Can we stay like this forever?

141. Please just kiss me already

142. I think you might be my soulmate

143. Sleep over? Please?

144. Are we on a date right now?

145. I think I’m in love with you

146. Are you flirting with me? You finally noticed?

147. Am I your lock screen? You weren’t supposed to see that

148. I wish we could live with each other already

149. They’re so cute when they’re asleep

150. I just wanted to let you know you’re beautiful

151. You take my breath away ... you know, like the song haha

152. Quit touching me, your feet are cold!

153. Sharing is caring, now give me the hoodie

154. Did you seriously just get your foot stuck in a toilet? Maybe

155. If I die, I’m haunting you first

156. But I’ve never told you that before

157. Stop being grumpy, it’s lame

158. Can we please stop running, I think I’m going to die

159. Can you please... hmmm I don’t know, maybe put a shirt on?!

160. You come here often? Well I work here so I think I’d have to say yes

161. Aren’t we supposed to be working?

162. You’re insane! You love me. Not right not now I don’t

163. Give me attention

164. YOU SAID TO BE HONEST, STOP HITTING ME!

165. Okay, so maybe I didn’t see that coming

166. I’m too sober for this. You don’t even drink. Maybe I should start

167. You met me yesterday. Yes, and I would die for you, next question

168. I’m telling you, I’m haunted

169. Well, that’s tragic

170. She’s hiding behind the sofa

171. I’d kill for a coffee... literally

172. What do you mean she’s my new partner? She tried to kill me last week! Sounds like a you problem

173. Good thing I didn’t ask for your opinion

174. I’m bulletproof, but please don’t shoot me

175. It’s six o’clock in the morning, you’re not having vodka

176. No. Regrets

177. How drunk was I?

178. How is my wife more badass than me?

179. It’s your turn to make dinner

180. They’re not your kids, back the fuck off

181. I could punch you right now

182. Welcome back. Now fucking help me

183. I’m not buying Ikea furniture ever again

184. That was kind of hot

9 notes · View notes

caws5749 · 5 years

Text

This took SO LONG thanks @natthisback

1: Name Madison

2: Age 21

3: 3 fears spiders, not becoming a doctor, becoming like my parents

4: 3 things i love marvel movies, my blanket (whoops), and scrunchies

5: 4 turn ons compliment me, be chivalrous, (idk if this means sex turn on too or not but) moaning my n- ANYWHO uh and the last one definitely like showing you want me

6: 4 turn offs someone who only talks about themselves, being like wishy washy, being arrogant/cocky, complaining about the same things

7: my best friend that would be shea @cloversofshea

8: sexual orientation lesbian

9: my best first date okay SO this like isn’t a first date but it was my first like nicer dinner date so I’m gonna count it. It was just this past weekend actually and i just i loved it so much it was amazing

10: how tall am i 5’2

11: what do i miss honestly, feeling like i was good at things

12: what time were i born 11:14am

13: favorite color purple, although it’s slowly been turning to like a baby light pink

14: do i have a crush yes yes i do and i likes her a lot

15: favorite quote “Truth is a matter of circumstance. It’s not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I.”

16: favorite place Chicago or New York City

17: favorite food SALMON

18: do i use sarcasm yes, but i feel like i don’t use it as much as i used to

19: what am i listening to right now Christmas pop playlist on Spotify

20: first thing i notice in new person whether they only talk about themselves

21: shoe size 8 or 8.5

22: eye color blue

23: hair color right now, it’s a brown that goes to blond at my ends

24: favorite style of clothing so if this means like fav style to wear daily, definitely athleisure. If it means in general, i love love love preppy looks? But not super preppy.

25: ever done a prank call? Absolutely, many times

27: meaning behind my url i explain this in my about me page (linked in bio!)

28: favorite movie captain America winter soldier

29: favorite song i don’t really have favorite songs but rn it’s prob December night by Michael buble

30: favorite band i don’t really have fav bands

31: how i feel right now it’s really hot in here, so warm. I feel okay

32: someone i love i love lots of people but ill stick with @cloversofshea

33: my current relationship status I’ve answered this so many times literally just look at the ask game tag

34: my relationship with my parents um yikes

35: favorite holiday Halloween

36: tattoos and piercing i have i have 6 tattoos! “Breathe” on my right inner ankle, a heart on left shoulder, heart w equal sign in it behind right ear, basically an ecg on my left inner ankle, Aquarius symbol on right bicep, and caws 5749 on my left side. And my ears are pierced.

37: tattoos and piercing i want definitely the black widow symbol in the same place Scarlett got her og6 tattoo, an amino acid tattoo that spells out “wah” , definitely more little tattoos! And maybe more ear piercings idk

38: the reason i joined tumblr so, I’ve had a tumblr for many many years. I originally joined bc my best friends at the time had them, and i was like sure! Ive deleted that personal blog since, and started my new personal blog a few years ago. I also have a studyblr that i started i think back in high school, and i just started this blog back in the end of July!

39: do i and my last ex hate each other no, I’d say far from it bc i likes her a lot

40: do i ever get “good morning” or “good night” texts yes from her and i fucking love it, it used to be a bigger thing almost every day and i loved it

41: have i ever kissed the last person i texted lmao no and for those who were wondering it is @cloversofshea

42: when did i last hold hands LMAO WITH @michelinaamour WHEN I WAS STUMBLING HOME DRUNK IN HIGH HEELS

43: how long does it take me to get ready in the morning it depends, anywhere from ten minutes to an hour and a half

44: have you shaved your legs in the past three days no! I am super lucky and have really light colored hairs on my legs and so i dont’ have to shave very often. Also i just want to say that i personally love shaving my legs and it is my choice to do so.. girls, you do not need to shave!!

45: where am i right now so i started answering this in the research lab, but i am currently sitting at one of the dining places on campus finishing it

46: if i were drunk and can’t stand, who’s taking care of me LMAO DEFINITELY @michelinaamour because she’s done it ALREADY FOR ME MULTIPLE TIMES

47: do i like my music loud or at a reasonable level it depends, in car trips, definitely blast it. But just driving around or listening in doors, definitely reasonable level

48: do i live with my mom and dad nope i live with @michelinaamour

49: am i excited for anything yes, I’m excited for lots of things. I get excited easily

50: do i have someone of the opposite sex i can tell everything to no. I used to

51: how often do i wear a fake smile this is a really interesting question. I don’t consider smiles i give to random people like ordering food or something to be fake, so i would say fake smiles are when I’m not okay and trying to hide it. Which happens less often now bc I’m just much happier of a person

52: when was the last time i hugged someone I think it was @michelinaamour two days ago but i think i hugged @cloversofshea that day too so

53: what if the last person i kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me I’d be heartbroken tbh

54: is there anyone i trust even though i should not yes, certain adults in my life

55: what is something i disliked about today my hair won’t do what i want it to :(

56: if i could meet anyone on this earth who would it be probably Chris Evans or Scarlett Johansson

57: what do i think about the most tumblr and everything with that, or probably her or school stuff definitely

58: what’s my strangest talent i don’t think i have any lol

59: do i have any strange phobias yes definitely haha, I’m terrified of stepping on worms

60: do i prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it i think a few years ago i would have said behind, but honestly I think I’d love to be in front of the camera now

61: what was the last lie i told i actually don’t know. Maybe this past weekend as to like the fact that i was going out on a date instead of just going out with a friend

62: do i prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online I’d say talking on the phone bc then they cant’ see me lmao

63: do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Yes and yes

64: do i believe in magic? Yes, or at least, that’s what i tell myself

65: do i believe in luck yes

66: what’s the weather like right now snowy!

67: what was the last book I’ve ever read The Butchering Art, it’s about the history of surgery

68: do i like the smell of gasoline omg yes yes yes yes yes yes

69: do i have any nicknames yes, madz, madi, girl who lives by the kitchen, queen (a new one) and clown (also a new one) thanks @natthisback

70: what was the worst injury I’ve ever had back in freshman year of college, i did something stupid and my foot swelled up like hell and hurt so bad. There were no fractures detected but the swelling stayed for a really long time, as well as the bruising and pain, and it never returned to normal

71: do i spent my money or save it SPEND IT BABY

72: can i touch my nose w my tongue no I’m not that talented

73: is there anything pink in 10 ft from me. Hmm part of my backpack? And my rings are pinkish bc they are rose gold. Oh and my scrunchie is pink, as well as my iPad

74: favorite animal cat

75: what was i doing last night at 12am i was still at work In the emergency room!

76: what do i think satan’s last name is uh honestly Jim lmao (it’s demons Jim! @cloversofshea )

77: what’s a song that always makes me happy when i hear it so good by dove Cameron

78: how can you win my heart suggest we watch a marvel movie, and I’m prob straight up in love. There are other things too but they’re pretty general, like compliment me, show you want me ya know

79: what would i want to be written on my tombstone haha, as a joke, “so realy its very thing. Just to keep everyone guessing.” But idk something funny

80: what is my favorite word i have no idea, maybe like sophisticated or something like that or aesthetic , champagne is a good one too

81: my top 5 blogs on tumblr ooh! Okay so @markiplier @lesbian-deadpool @americasass-romanoff @lesbianmariahilll @shining-rey-of-sunshine but i love so so so so so many more, and i have a lot of top blogs

82: if the whole world were listening to me right now what would i say fuck trump also I’m gay as hell and I’m growing tired of hiding it from people

83: do i have any relatives in jail not that i know of

84: i accidentally eat some radioactive vegatables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super power of my choice! What is that power lmao this question is great. Prob same powers as Wanda

85: what would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on any weird fetis- JUST KIDDING. Do you still think about them?

86: what is my current desktop picture so on my laptop, it’s fall flowers. But since that’s broken af, i use my iPad and that background is one of the apple ones. It’s just a beach idk why but I’ve never changed it

87: had sex WHY IS THIS IN EVERY SINGLE ASK GAME WTF

88: bought condoms nope i am gay as hell bye

89: gotten pregnant nope i am gay as hell bye

90: failed a class nope, definitely come close though

91: kissed a boy yes

92: kissed a girl yes

93: have i ever kissed somebody in th rain honestly, probably at some point, but I’ve never had one of those romantic kisses in the rain. I really really want to though and i think about it a lot

94: had job yeah, I’ve had three true jobs

95: left the house without my wallet probably

96: bullied someone on the internet no bc I’m not a fucking douche

97: had sex in public not yet

98: played on a sports team yeah, played softball and basketball in middle school

99: smoked weed yeah, but i didn’t get high

100: did drugs nope

101: smoked cigarettes nope, i think i asked drunk once if i could smoke, but my friend was like “really?” And i was like uhhhhhh just kidding haha

102: drank alcohol lmao i drink fucking all the time i mean. I literally have drunk writing nights , I’m drinking tonight too

103: am i a vegetarian/vegan i was a vegetarian for a while, and then an aspiring vegan, and then vegetarian, and then pescatarian now!

104: been overweight no

105: been underweight yes

106: been to a wedding yeah, but like not for a long time. I was like 4 and the flower girl. Oh WAIT. Does playing a wedding count? I played cello at a wedding so i was there???

107: been on the computer for 5 hours straight hell yeah, how would i function not doing this with class and relaxing

108: watched tv for 5 hours straight lmao definitely

109: been outside my home country yeah

110: gotten my heart broken yeah

111: been to a professional sports game yeah. I don’t really do sports though , so when i go it’s usually in suites and I’m just there for the food

112: broken a bone nope!

113: cut myself this is...a. Really deep question but bc i want to be able to speak about mental health on here, the answer is yes.

114: been to prom yes! I went to my junior and senior proms!

115: been in airplane too many times

116: fly by helicopter no, I’m not sure if i want to do this or not

117: what concerts have i been to I’ve been to lots. So first off, I’ve been to hundreds of classical concerts (and performed in them). As for pop, Bruno mars twice, maroon five like three times. Selena Gomez. Josh groban. American authors. Definitely others that i don’t remember

118: had a crush on someone of the same sex yes I’m fucking gay

119: learned another language so if this means fluent, no. I took a decent amount of French and am learning Russian right now!

120: wore make up absolutely. When i choose to wear makeup, its because i fuckign love makeup haha. Most days I’m lazy though and like to let my skin breathe and be natural

121: lost my virginity before I was 18 no

122: had oral sex yeah

123: dyed my hair many times

124: voted in a presidential election okay i think so but honestly can’t remember. But I’m pretty sure i did.

125: rode in an ambulance no and i never want to.

126: had a surgery no and i never want to haha. Well i cant say that. Depending on how my life plays out, I might freeze my eggs or something.

127: met someone famous yes, several I think, but probably Henry winkler was the one I remember most.

128: stalked someone on a social network yeah

129: peed outside nope don’t think so and definitely don’t want to

130: been fishing yes I have been ice fishing and regular fishing

131: helped w charity i have!

132: been rejected by a crush I’ve been not liked back but i don’t think I’ve ever made like a move on a crush and been rejected

133: broken a mirror ooh i don’t think i have actually

134: what do i want for birthday nothing bc i dont’ like my bday

#madison speaks #ask game

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snkpolls · 5 years

Text

SnK S3E22 Poll Results (Manga Reader Version)

The poll closed with 305 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated! And we apologize for the delay in getting the results posted!

Please note that these are the results of the manga reader poll. Anime only watchers are suggested not to read if you do not wish to be spoiled about certain events! Anime only viewers, click here to view your poll results!

RATE THE EPISODE 290 Responses

The final episode received mid to high ratings overall, with 74.5% of participants rating it at a 5. No doubt the anime staff did a great job closing the season.

Greatest ending of a season ever.

i cant watch the ocean scene without crying so id say it was a pretty good ep

This episode was beyond boring and the ending was captivating, but still not enough to make up for such a boring episode.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS THE MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT? 299 Responses

Several of the preferred moments in the episode took place at long-awaited ocean. 40.1% of participants were most impacted by Eren’s despairing words while looking across the sea. 18.1% enjoyed seeing exchanged smiles between Armin and Mikasa, and 14.7% most loved the first time the Survey Corps laid eyes on the ocean.

Rarely have I seen a scene so beautiful that had so much episodes of set-up. The ocean scene lived up to the hype. EMA finally got to the see the Umi

The ocean scene was more beautiful than I could've imagined.

Floch was spitting FIRE!!

At this point I'm just glad they did justice to everyone finally seeing the ocean. The scene seemed to fall a little flat in the manga - not too badly, but enough that it didn't hit me the way I thought it would. The extra build up the anime added, along with seeing it in motion and hearing the voice acting, gave the anime version a lot more punch.

DID PIXIS AND HISTORIA MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION BY CHOOSING TO REVEAL THE TRUTH TO THE PUBLIC? 298 Responses

Pixis and Historia decided it was best to share the truth of the outside world with the public, no matter the response. 93% of participants believed this was the right call, while a smaller percent thought otherwise or were unsure.

They did it, but it was just kinda spilled to the public and caused a lot of uproar. I dunno if letting the newspaper report on it was the best idea.

WHO DO YOU THINK WROTE THE “INTENTS FOR THE FUTURE” EXCERPT IN THE EYE CATCH? 294 Responses

The mid-episode information card showed an entry about “Intent for the Future” in response to the truth of the world. 49.7% of participants believe the talk of diplomacy implied Armin was the author, whereas 16.3% believe it was Hange. 13.9% think the contemplative tone may have been Eren’s doing.

I think the "intents for the future" is written by Hange, since it says "watashi" and only they have "the duty" to come up with a better plan than the rumbling.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO FIRST IF YOU’VE NEVER SEEN OR KNEW ABOUT THE OCEAN BEFORE? 294 Responses

Had there been no prior real world awareness of the ocean, 60.9% of participants would choose to slowly dip their feet in the water during their first encounter. 17.7% would rather observe the strange discovery from afar, and 11.2% would contemplate the meaning of life.

WHOSE INITIAL REACTION TO THE SEA WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 299 Responses

The characters’ first reactions varied upon their initial encounter with the sea. 30.4% of participants most enjoyed Armin’s marveled gaze at his most anticipated dream, while 22.7% liked Mikasa’s surprised reaction the most. Eren’s less impressed and discouraged expressions were most favored by 18.1% of participants.

Armin and Mikasa at the ocean scene was one of the BEST THINGS EVER.

I thought the animation in the first half was a little weak, but damn, I could watch Armin gaze fondly upon the ocean for hours. The animation there was on point.

Armin and Mikasa were so cute in the ocean scene, smiling and blushing!!! Seeing Armin's happy tears after finally seeing the ocean was really moving too!! <3 I'm sad though Eren couldn't enjoy it the same way as them...

HOW WELL DID THE ANIME TEAM ADAPT CHAPTER 90? 295 Responses

The episode only covered chapter 90, but a majority of participants believed the anime did a faithful adaptation of the manga, with 78.6% saying it was near perfect.

It was fucking perfect and I even dare to say it was better than in the manga. Animation, background music, characters expressions, seiyuus - these made this episode so great. I really cried when I watched and listened to Eren talking about freedom and enemy, what didnt happen to me when I read it. I could feel his deep sadness and it was better shown how much he's changed. Kudos to everyone at studio WIT involved in snk and especially this episode

The pacing was a bit too slow. They could’ve picked up the pace a bit by maybe adding one more anime only scene. Also, they should have left off with Falco.

HOW WELL DID THE ANIME DEPICT THE FIRST MOMENT OF SEEING THE OCEAN? 296 Responses

Finally seeing the ocean animated in full color, 54.7% of participants thought the moment exceeded the manga version with the captivating visuals and awed expressions. 38.2% compared it equally emotional as the manga version while 5.1% were pleased but preferred the moment in the manga.

They made it look so wholesome I nearly forgot Eren’s suffering

Idk I didn't see because there was water in my line of sight. That happens every time since the episode that broke my heart.

It felt so unreal, they did an incredible job of transcribing from the point of view of the characters and I think I felt at least as upset as they were by discovering the beautiful graphics of the ocean.

It was underwhelming and I didn’t care for the scene at all

IN THE ANIME, EREN GETS OFF OF HIS HORSE AND TOUCHES THE IMMOBILE TITAN. WHAT’D YOU THINK OF THIS CHANGE? 299 Responses

The anime altered the moment Eren sees the immobile titan by including him dismounting his horse and physically touching its head. 74.9% of participants thought the moment properly captured Eren’s newfound sympathy for the titans as fellow compatriots. 9.7% believe it made him look more sympathetic than in reality, and 5.7% didn’t think the change was needed.

It made more clean to the audience that Eren new target/enemy are not the titans anymore, now feeling pity for their compatriots. And his templance and tone remind us Kruger/Grisha presence on him, his hatred for Marley.

I was pinned on the spot, and I had to look at this passage several times to be sure of having seen well. Wow, Eren touched a titan and considers him "one of theirs". This passage was made without special emphasis, as if it was normal that Eren had compassion for a titan, and it really shaken me.

I think it was a rly nice addiction but I dont think its about Eren symphatizing with the titans, rather to me it shows Eren's melancholy of facing the truth about the titans. He wasnt feeling sympathy or pity for that titan, just the truth that it was once a person, the truth outside the walls, beyond the ocean.

it was an odd change but it kinda illustrated just how much of an impact memories/paths are having on eren’s mind

It was a bit cheesy

Eren is now the titan whisperer

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT THE FEW FRAMES OF THE ATTACK ON LIBERIO IN THE END CREDITS? 297 Responses

The ending credits revealed some scenes of the Attack on Liberio and its aftermath. 64.3% of participants felt the inclusion was a good way to build suspense for the final season, while 24.2% think the scenes were too subtle for anime viewers to react and specifically catered to manga readers.

As for the ending itself, it's a good thing they released extra pics, but the main issue; if you follow the anime, is this: the screencaps don't show where it's located, not when these events take place. It could take place on Paradis, it could mean the mean Marleys are attacking in full force again, or if we're this far in the manga, it could be assumed the characters at the sea have no choice but to become monsters to fight the monsters of the outside world... which goes against what the manga portrays when you take into account there's been 9 chapters dedicated to show the POV from the other side of the ocean.

THERE ARE A COUPLE SCENES IN THE END CREDITS THAT HAVEN’T BEEN ILLUSTRATED IN THE MANGA. DO YOU BELIEVE THESE ARE FUTURE PANELS THAT WILL APPEAR LATER IN THE STORY? 297 Responses

There were a few scenes in the credits that were not illustrated in the manga. 53.2% of participants believe these will be future panels in the upcoming manga chapters, but 38% aren’t quite sure. A smaller 8.8% think the scenes are just for show or anime only and will not make a comeback in the manga.

WHO IS THE GIRL STUDENT IN THE UNIFORM? 296 Responses

One of the unillustrated scenes showed a girl in a school uniform among other students. 37.8% think the student is an Eldian, and 35.8% think she is Marleyan. 19.6% believe this is the future depicting a modern-day student. Will she be shown again? Some believe this is someone we already knew.

Also, I'm leaning towards the theory that the girl in the uniform is Lady Tybur when she attended a private school.

The girl student in the uniform is likely Ms Tybur (the Warhammer titan), as the school looks quite prestigious, and they are the only high class characters of importance in Marley. I hope this means that we might get a bit more on her character in the anime adaptation.

WITH THE PV CONFIRMATION THAT THE 4TH SEASON WILL BE THE FINAL ONE, WHAT’S YOUR GUESS FOR WHEN THE MANGA WILL END? 298 Responses

The brief preview announcement of the 4th season set to release confirmed it would be the anime’s final season. With the release date in the fall of next year, 44.6% of manga reading participants believe the manga series will conclude in mid to late 2020. 22.8% think the manga will end early in the beginning of next year, and 14.8% believe Isayama and the animation studio will work together to release the finale of both the manga and anime around the same time. As of recently, Isayama thinks he has about a year left to complete his story, but only time will tell when it actually ends.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Not your usual beach episode lol. Wished the stinger is they show Falco looking up on sky in Fort Slava, but maybe it's too revealing for anime onlies?

I can't believe we've come this far already. Everything was beautifully done, the end credits were just absolutely poignant and the extra scenes have only made me more impatient for more Manga chapters.

It's probably the episode of Snk that caused the most emotion in me. Eren's seiyuu especially, but also Armin's were really excellent. The melancholy of Eren's voice, and the hope so fragile and so beautiful of Armin, appeared to me strikingly thanks to that. The separation that prefigures in EMA trio, and the dreams that break as they face what they had sought from the beginning pierced me.

That piano score that played throughout the end credits...Sure Sawano you can tear out my heart, this show's gotten me used to it anyway…

Also can I just say Mikasa in the ocean was really fucking adorable? Because she was. I've always had this headcanon that she would love the ocean because the half of her that isn't an Ackerman is from the ""East Sea Clan"" and so I would think coastal life and seafaring would be in her blood. This episode has only strengthened this headcanon for me. :)

I miss Erwin. I don't think that'll ever change, but duuudes Floch made me cry every harder. He's such a lost kid and he's alone in his grief. No one should be alone 😭

years of waiting and god has finally gifted us with a masterpiece.

The anime-only scenes were a very nice touch, and added to the emotion of the arc. Considering what's become of Eren and Floch (ugh) now, the scene where Eren touches the Titan, followed by Floch hanging behind for a moment, seemed quite telling. Can't wait to see the next season (and all the death and destruction that unfortunately accompanies it).

Honestly this season, and potentially the entire series was ruined for me because of how they handled Uprising. It was an alright adaptation, with some admittedly outstanding scenes, but the first part of the season really killed my hype for the second part.

Mikasa’s smile to Armin was the only part of this episode I thought was done more effectively than in the manga. She’s been through so much; it was sweet to see her out of her element in a GOOD way, WITH her family there. This scene cemented her as my 3rd favorite character.

I picked up on the little, subtle changes, and I really enjoyed them. WIT did an amazing job on this episode, and it was fairly lived up to.

There wasn't much filler, but I liked what they did with adding Grisha's distorted facial expression and how they conveyed Eren's at the end of the first half. Also nice Floch filler where he asks why the SC doesn't cull that titan lol.

Hitch broke my heart ;-;

I’m not ready. Somebody save us! I don’t want hobo Eren yet!

Truly amazing. It was really refreshing to see the characters taking a break from all the gore and enjoy the moment. Great ending.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 284 Responses

Thank you to everyone who participated!

#snk poll #snk polls #snk s3 #poll results

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greymuse · 5 years

Text

Witchy QnA

1. Are you solitary or in a coven?

Solitary!

2. Do you consider yourself Wiccan, Pagan, witch, or other?

Witch, or Enchantress if I wanna sound fancy

3. What is your zodiac sign?

Leo sun, Aquarius moon, Leo rising

4. Do you have a Patron God/dess?

Nope

5. Do you work with a Pantheon?

Nope

6. Do you use tarot, palmistry, or any other kind of divination?

Tarot sometimes

7. What are some of your favorite herbs to use in your practice? (if any)

Im just starting to get into more physical items. I was raised to do most things mentally.

8. How would you define your craft?

Im not sure? Green but a lil eclectic

9. Do you curse? If not, do you accept others who do?

I dont think of it as cursing. More so protection from certain people.

10. How long have you been practicing?

I found out about what I was already doing as being Witchcraft a couple months ago. But Ive been using Tarot, using kitchen Witch spells, as “prayers” as spells since I can remember

11. Do you currently or have you ever had any familiars?

Nope. I hope to have one soon though

12. Do you believe in Karma or Reincarnation?

Absolutely believe in karma. Reincarnation, possibly. Its definitely something I think about

13. Do you have a magical name?

Nope.

14. Are you “out of the broom closet”?

My whole moms side practices casually, so I mean I guess? But I havent referred to myself as a Witch or something like that.

15. What was the last spell you performed?

I enchanted a ring I got. Also, a money spell that worked but uhh its definitely showing me that I need to work harder.

16. Would you consider yourself knowledgeable?

Im pretty decent. Most of what I look up is common knowledge to me

17. Do you write your own spells?

I havent yet, but I also dont do many spells verbally. I more so visually manifest

18. Do you have a book of shadows? If so, how is it written and/or set up?

I do, Its just a plain lil notebook, I have just some basic reference sheet type things in it.

19. Do you worship nature?

Absolutely

20. What is your favorite gemstone?

rose quartz. or tigers eye

21. Do you use feathers, claws, fur, pelt, skeletons/bones, or any other animal body part for magical work?

I dont particularly enjoy using animal/ human materials. I use natural things, like dirt and water.

22. Do you have an altar?

Not so much a physical Altar, but my bed is definitely my safe space and I can clear my mind here the easiest.

23. What is your preferred element?

Water, but fire always make me wide eyed and curious. definitely curious. but its destructive potential scares me.

24. Do you consider yourself an Alchemist?

Not art all haha

25. Are you any other type of magical practitioner besides a witch?

Im not sure!

26. What got you interested in witchcraft?

realizing that I had been practicing for my whole life and I hadnt known before

27. Have you ever performed a spell or ritual with the company of anyone who was not a witch?

yeah, with my mom and her mom. I just didnt know at the time. We do protection spells often.

28. Have you ever used ouija?

yup! with my mom and her mom. Its just a family thing we do every time we all get together. I grew up thinking it was completely normal.

29. Do you consider yourself a psychic?

My mom says I used to be. I used to dream about natural disasters before they happened as a kid. I dont think im too good anymore. just empathetic.

30. Do you have a spirit guide? If so, what is it?

I dont think I do. If anything, I do feel a feminine energy? dark (like a shadow, not negative) and watery is the best way I can describe it. But its not a human entity. Just energy.

31. What is something you wish someone had told you when you first started?

That not everyone believes what you do. And its totally okay! Just maybe dont loudly announce your Ouija board antics with your science teacher in middle school.

32. Do you celebrate the Sabbats? If so which one is your favorite?

I havent before, but im going to try to this year

33. Would you ever teach witchcraft to your children?

Absolutely. I want my son to grow up the same way I did around magick. Itll be normal for him.

34. Do you meditate?

Sometimes! its definitely something im trying to do more often.

35. What is your favorite season?

Fall and Spring! Theres so much change

36. What is your favorite type of magick to preform?

Im not sure yet! Ive only just started branching out and actually considering what ive been doing all my life as magick.

37. How do you incorporate your spirituality into your daily life?

Daily affirmations/ protection spells, I manifest me and my sons happiness and safety every day.

38. What is your favorite witchy movie?

I dont think Ive seen any haha

39. What is your favorite witchy book, both fiction and non-fiction. Why?

The Darkest Powers books by Kelly Armstrong. More supernatural (vampires, werewolves, stuff like that) but I loved it growing up.

40. What is the first spell you ever preformed? Successful or not.

Knowingly, a protection spell from someone who had hurt me

41. What’s the craziest witchcraft-related thing that’s happened to you?

Im not sure! I can see auras if i really focus and can tune into someone, so maybe when i saw a family member with a pure black aura? That was freaky

42. What is your favourite type of candle to use?

I dont use candles! Bonfires or fires in fireplaces usually, to burn a paper if needed. Again, I dont trust myself with fire very much.

43. What is your favorite witchy tool?

My crystals and my tarot. They all have vibrations. Everything does but especially those, because im so connected to them

44. Do you or have you ever made your own witchy tools?

I want to! Havent yet

45. Have you ever worked with any magical creatures such as the fea or spirits?

Spirits, yes. I can call on family that Ive known in person for protection. Been doing that as long as i can remember

46. Do you practice color magic?

I used to! i dont really anymore.

47. Do you or have you ever had a witchy teacher or mentor of any kind?

My mom, aunt, and grandma!

48. What is your preferred way of shopping for witchcraft supplies?

Dollar store, thrift store, antique stores (though im always hesitant to use something that belonged to someone else. If there isnt a close emotional attachment, there wont be any noticeable vibrations.

49. Do you believe in predestination or fate?

I think theres a general way that things can happen. More like a decide your fate book. There are multiple options, it just depends on what you choose.

50. What do you do to reconnect when you are feeling out of touch with your practice?

Meditate, or go to the lake.

51. Have you ever had any supernatural experiences?

ohhhh boy. I got stories.

52. What is your biggest witchy pet peeve?

People thinking theyre better bc they have a crap ton of materials, thinking im less than because I visualize easier than with material items.

53. Do you like incense? If so what’s your favorite scent?

I do, I just cant very often. I have a child and very smell sensitive people livingg with me

54. Do you keep a dream journal of any kind?

I rarely ever remember a dream, so no

55. What has been your biggest witchcraft disaster?

Im not sure ive had one yet

56. What has been your biggest witchcraft success?

I havent seen who i dont want to see since protecting myself

57. What in your practice do you do that you may feel silly or embarrassed about?

Everything, haha. I think thats why I enjoy visualizing instead of rituals or verbal stuff.

58. Do you believe that you can be an atheist, Christian, Muslim or some other faith and still be a witch too?

Absolutely!

59. Do you ever feel insecure, unsure or even scared of spell work?

yes, I feel like it //can be// kinda like a genie in a bottle type thing. Itll work, but not without a price.

60. Do you ever hold yourself to a standard in your witchcraft that you feel you may never obtain?

Nope

61. What is something witch related that you want right now?

A cauldron to mix and burn things in haha

62. What is your rune of choice?

I dont know yet! Runes are something Im looking into

63. What is your tarot card of choice?

My birth card, the Tower.

64. Do you use essential oils? If so what is your favorite?

I love lemon and eucalyptus

65. Have you ever taken any kind of witchcraft or pagan courses?

nope!

66. Do you wear pagan jewelry in public?

Nope

67. Have you ever been discriminated against because of your faith or being a witch?

No one that would feel that way knows anything about it

68. Do you read or subscribe to any pagan magazines?

nope

69. Do you think it’s important to know the history of paganism and witchcraft?

Yes. Its like knowing world history and us history, We need to learn from the past.

70. What are your favorite things about being a witch?

I feel powerful, and connected and accepted by nature.

71. What are your least favorite things about being a witch?

having to tiptoe around things around certain people

72. Do you listen to any pagan music? If so who is your favorite singer/band?

Nope! ill have to look into it

73. Do you celebrate the Esbbats? If so, how?

I havent fully figured out what i want to do for the moon cycles yet, but I definitely want to. the moon and water are so closely related

74. Do you ever work skyclad?

No, but i mean.. maybe one day?

75. Do you think witchcraft has improved your life? If so, how?

I feel like i have more control of how im able to use my emotions and feelings

76. Where do you draw inspiration from for your practice?

The energy i talked about before.. It gets more intense and stronger sometimes, and i know i need to put more time and effort into my practice

77. Do you believe in ‘fantasy’ creatures? (Unicorns, fairies, elves, gnomes, ghosts, etc)

no, but i do believe in energy. not ghosts per say but definitely energy

78. What’s your favorite sigil/symbol?

I try to make most of them myself. I have one for protection while driving that i use for me and my boyfriend a lot. And one for the safety of my son.

79. Do you use blood magick in your practice? Why or why not?

Not as of right now. I did bleed onto my tarot cards on accident though..

80. Could you ever be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t support your practice?

Theres a difference between “doesnt understand and doesnt care to” and “fully doest support and refuses to let you practice safely”. I dont mind the first, but wouldnt stay with the second.

81. In what area or subject would you most like your craft to grow?

Reading auras, and tarot. Also just connecting with nature more

82. What’s your favorite candle scent? Do you use it in your practice?

I love fall scents! but no, i dont really use candles

83. Do you have a pre-ritual ritual? (I.e. Something you do before rituals to prepare yourself for them). If so what is it?

Meditate and protect

84. What real life witch most inspires your practice?

My mom honestly lmao. i dont think she views herself as a full witch though.And my aunt

85. What is your favorite method of communicating with deity?

I dont worship dieties. But i like to just be in natural and connect emotionally, nonverbally to this energy Im somehow connected with.

86. How do you like to organize all your witchy items and ingredients?

In this lil wooden box my mom gave me for my birthday to hold the tarot cards my grandma gave me haha.

87. Do you have any witches in your family that you know of?

my mom. aunt, and grandma. I know my grandpas grandma was a voodoo witch too.

88. How have you created your path? What is unique about it?

I havent seen much about nonverbal, mostly mental witchcraft. So i guess thats one unique thing.

89. Do you feel you have any natural gifts or affinities (premonitions, hearing spirits, etc.) that led you toward the craft? If so what are they?

A couple things. Feeling vibrations, the connection to nature, auras, growing up surrounded by it.

90. Do you believe you can initiate yourself or do you have to be initiated by another witch or coven?

I believe you can initiate yourself. I dont feel the need for someone elses validation is i know my connection with nature is real

91. When you first started out in your path what was the first thing or things you bought?

crystals, lmao

92. What is the most spiritual or magickal place you’ve been?

The southern oregon coast. honestly everywhere in oregon feels so alive and vibrating so heavily with energy. The water and the lush greenery is perfection.

93. What’s one piece of advice you’d give someone who is searching for their matron and patron deities?

I have no idea, I dont follow a deity

94. What techniques do you use to ‘get in the zone’ for meditation?

quiet, listen to music i like and that help calm me, slightly cool, a breeze is good. the sound of real water flowing from a lake or ocean. recordings of water dont help me. sometimes white noise if theres too much noise

95. Did visualization come easily to you or did you have to practice at it?

visualization is the easiest thing for me. ive always daydreamed so heavily that itll be like im dreaming with my eyes totally open and tracking.

96. Do you prefer day or night? Why?

early mornings, right as the sun is coming up.

97. What do you think is the best time and place to do spell work?

I like doing spell work before bed, when the moon is bright enough to light up what im doing

98. How did you feel when you cast your first circle? Did you stumble or did it go smoothly?

I dont know if it counts as casting a circle? but i visualize a swirling white ball of energy, starting out like a strawberry size in my hands, and every time i breath in, it gets bigger. Its a protection circle. i learned to do it at like?? 3 years old?

99. Do you believe witchcraft gets easier with time and practice?

Yup!

100. Do you believe in many gods or one God with many faces?

If i had to guess, id say multiple gods/ goddesses. one entity shouldnt have that much power imo.

101. Do you eat meat, eggs and dairy?

Ive been trying to go vegetarian, and i eat minimal eggs and dairy.

102. What is your favorite color and why?

dark, smokey colors. grey, black, dark muted purples, navy, smoky pink.

103. What is the one question you get asked most by non-practitioners or non-pagans? How do you usually respond?

I dont have many people im even slightly into that stuff, let alone a witch. So usually just “how do i cleanse my house? i think its haunted” type stuff

104. Which of your five senses would you say is your strongest?

Feel, haha, physically and emotionally.

105. What is a pagan or witchcraft rule that you preach but don’t practice?

Always properly cleanse new materials, haha

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angelofavarice · 5 years

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Answer all of them fool

I suppose fairs fair

1. Virginia

2. 17

3. January

4. Cap babey!

5. Cobalt blue

6. Six! My lucky numbers six

7. I have cat dog dog cat

8. I am from Delaware

9. 5’5

10. Size Seven

11. I think i have six pairs of shoes

12. I dreamed this package ive been waiting for for a month came

13. My talent is making other ppl understand stuff like that shit teachers are supposed to do

14. I am not psychic i have no intuition

15. Madman by zero authority or All or nothing by elliphant or reflaugh by hungry lights

16. Avatar or Nerve or Bedazzled or probably all three

17. Someone who will eat pickles and doesnt kill spiders

18. Hell fuck yes i want kids

19. No cuz i dont want a wedding

20. Not really

21. Yea i went when i was little for surgery and i pretty much lived there a couple years ago

22. Nah cuz they cant catch me ; o p

23. My sisters gonna b on tv does that count

24. Always showers

25. Blacc socks

26. Ive never been famous but im popular and well liked among my peers which is basically the same thing

27. I would never wanna b a celebrity i hate being popular and well liked among my peers

28. I listen to metal punk and jazz w a lil soft spot for really electric pop

29. No

30. I sleep with as many pillows as i can get for i believe in living life comfortably

31. If i dont sleep on my stomach my shoulders get really fucked up so

32. Not

33. I would rather die than eat breakfast even tho i love breakfast foods

34. Why would i have any desire to fire a gun

35. Ive done archery a bunch

36. Glib

37. Whore

38. I dont think ive been more than like 23 hrs without sleep

39. Regrettably yes

40. If ive ever had a secret admirer i wouldnt know cuz theyre secret boom next question

41. I can b a good liar

42. Absolutely not i still dont have any intuition

43. I can do a bitchin southern accent

44. I speak mostly gen american so no

45. I love me a good drawl, its a soothing voice to listen to

46. Everytime ive taken the myers briggs test ive gotten a different answer and it’s probably bc im not a person

47. The most expensive piece of clothing i have are my platform boots which isnt really saying much but like i saved for them for a while

48. Yes? Idk i feel like everyone shows me this does it a different way

49. Innie (thanks surgery from earlier)

50. Right handed

51. I am still technically afraid of spiders but im working on just not bc theyre cool and awesome and deserve life

52. Mnms i cant stop eating them its such a problemmmmmm

53. Idk if this counts but pot stickers HIT also channa masala is fukin good

54. I am messy in personality. So very, very messy

55. Probably “that/it fucks”

56. Fuck fucking fucker i do not hav a wide vocabulary

57. It takes me 14 minutes to get ready in the morning but to properly get ready more like 26/7

58. My ego is so large it cannot be comprehended by mortal minds

59. Both

60. All the time it never ends ppl who drive next to me see me yelling at myself and think me a weirdo

61. Also yes

62. No one has ever heard me so theyre not allowed to say one way or the other

63. Oof no skip

64. I try not to b

65. I dont really watch dramas cuz they make me mad ( does sharknado count? Pacific rim? Now that im thinking abt it idk wat constitutes a drama)

66. On me, long hair, on others, doesnt matter

67. I still have the state song from second grade memorized so FUCK YES

68. Biology! I love biology! Chems also pretty cool but its makin me wanna die a little

69. Ambivert

70. No

71. Bitch everything but mostly new situations

72. Not really im scared of not being able to see and falling and busting my ass

73. Sometimes yes sometimes no i hav social intelligence and kno when u shouldnt b nit picky

74. Who isnt

75. Yea but i dont think ive ever started a rumor abt a person

76. I always naturally end up in some sort of leadership position and its annoying as hell

77. Yes

78. Technically

79. Thats a very difficult question to answer

80. Three

81. No i take french

82. If i type fast i type wrong

83. I can sprint pretty fast but anything more than like a minute is a no go i dont b egg of sizing

84. Brown and pink

85. Brown and not pink

86. Bitch everything thanks del river- the environment, most sunscreens, immunity boosters like airborne, ibuprofen and advil and i have a slight cross sensitivity to aleeve

87. Yes its the only way i remember things

88. Their best

89. No

90. Currently my band teacher hes a cunt

91. I guess? Like im used to my name now so i dont have any problems with it but ive always liked the idea of being called angel

92. Not having baby, not naming baby, am adopt thank u

93. I want a kid for a child

94. I work my ass off

95. I work my ass off to the point where i dont stop and im left sitting in the crumbling shambles of my metal stability

96. Movie

97. Really doubt it but i couldnt b certain

98. Still yes they have not faded from my skin

99. One is brown other is purble

100. One is yellow the other is white

101. I nominate myself for the “never having to think deeply abt ur existence ever again” challenge thank u and goodnight

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